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Published:
2022-07-10
Updated:
2022-07-12
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2,229
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2/3
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black out days

Summary:

“-owever, so you need to come with me or this whole fucking thing will blow up in our faces.”

Klaus blinked. “Sorry, what was that?” Five’s mouth turned up in a comical ‘o’ shape as his eyebrows drew together.

“Were you listening to a single fucking thing I just said?”

...

The knife was cold against his skin.

Klaus felt the man's arm tense as he straightened the gun towards Five’s head.

He shoved away the arm around his neck and ignored the stinging pain as the blade scratched his throat.

or

Klaus has a habit of forgetting useful information. Or any information, really. Unfortunately, when he unconsciously omits to tell them he can't die, they have an understandable freak-out when he is fatally shot. Luckily he pops back to life, followed by an angsty, long-overdue discussion about his worth to their messed up family.

Notes:

alrighty so this is fuelled by salt'n'vinegar chips and rage and i wrote it at 4am this morning. it's actually my first ever fic so please don't be mean i am 14 and struggling and very tired and i just want to die so uwu i guess

i know the house isn't *geographically* correct and the rooms are in the wrong place but don't nitpick i only realised after that it's the wrong place but its 11.00 and i'm not fixing it so just let it be

thank you so much for reading this disaster of a story and if you can hit the kudos if you like it you will be my favourite person everrrr! you can even have a bagel!!!

and yeah, did i google useless gun facts for this fic? yeah i did so what

chapter title: 'as the world caves in' my fav version is matt malteses'!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: as the world caves in

Chapter Text

Klaus didn’t know exactly what time it was, only that there was no light shining through the basement windows above the counter. He could hear Luther’s horrendous snores even though there were two floors between them, and the vague sound of the shower running somewhere in the mansion. The lights were off except for the lamp in the far corner, casting a warm yellow light over the empty kitchen.

The chair opposite him was occupied by Ben. A book rested in his translucent hands, almost looking like it was floating if it weren’t for the vague outline of his figure. Of course, Klaus could see him perfectly, but he knew that if someone else walked into the kitchen right now they would just see a book being held up by nothing unless they looked closer. The blue illuminating his hands and Ben’s body was flickering like lights in a power surge as Klaus struggled to not fall asleep in the warm, dim kitchen.

He jumped as a blue flash illuminated the scene and there was a thud as the book fell through Ben’s hands and onto the wooden table, Klaus’ concentration lost by the distraction of his brother’s appearance.

“Klaus?” Five said, peering at him through the dark haze of the kitchen. “What was that for?”

Klaus was puzzled. “What was what for?”

“Why’d you throw that book?”

“I didn’t – oh. That wasn’t – that wasn’t me – Ben, he -”

Five cut him off with a glare. “I swear if you say Ben threw it, I will teleport you to the top of the Eiffel Tower and drop you off it. You can’t blame everything on your maybe-hallucination.”

Klaus couldn’t even be bothered to argue anymore. It was too late. “Alright. Want some coffee?” He pushed the half-empty coffee jug over the scratched table to Five. His younger-older brother was looking very stressed, and in Klaus’ experience caffeine was the ultimate fix-all. It was like ultimate frisbee. But without a frisbee.

Unfortunately, Klaus was very used to hearing his siblings’ problems. They seemed to think him as carefree as Luther did, when he confessed drunkenly before going out and leaving Klaus to chase after him although he didn’t deserve it, setting into orbit a whole new problem in Klaus’ already busy schedule of fuck nope I’m too sober for this shit. As a result, his siblings seemed to think they were free to discuss all their problems with him. Man, they didn’t even pay him.

He turned his already wavering attention back to his little/big brother who was standing haughtily at the head of the table, looking so much like his dad that Klaus had to turn away for a second lest he flinch at the onslaught of memories attacking his caffeine-addled brain. He recognized the pose though and forced himself to listen to Five as he continued talking.

“-owever, so you need to come with me or this whole fucking thing will blow up in our faces.”

Klaus blinked. “Sorry, what was that?” Five’s mouth turned up in a comical ‘o’ shape as his eyebrows drew together.

“Were you listening to a single fucking thing I just said?”

“Well, yeah, you said something about – like, going with you or something – very Terminator, by the way, ‘come with me if you want to live’ sorta thing-“ He stopped as Five’s face turned from comical disbelief to barely-contained rage.

Maybe he should listen – Ben certainly thought so. He felt rather attacked, sitting there in flared jeans and a tucked-in vintage tee proclaiming ‘MISO HUNGRY’. Both his brothers, alive and dead, were glaring at him. He began to feel that maybe listening was something he should do. Above him the shower turned off and footsteps padded the carpet above his head. Allison, then. Her room was above his – kinda – and she had a bathroom that everyone (except Klaus) stayed out of because of the multitude of hair and makeup care products occupying every surface.

Five took a deep breath. He looked as though he was trying not to punch someone. Klaus may have only had him back for a few days, but he was so signing him up for some anger management classes when this whole apocalypse thing was over.

“I was at Griddy’s Donuts the other day- “

Klaus gasped. “Oooh! You were behind that whole murder-thing, weren’t you? I was almost worried there was a serial killer on the loose, but it’s okay, it was just our very own psycho assassin!”

Now Klaus was seriously worried he was going to punch something. “Oh my god Klaus. Someone is going to break into the house!”

Klaus stopped talking. Ben questioningly looked over at him as he stared at Five. “Is this like, a friendly visit, or is it like a friendly visit but not to us?” He thought of something. “With guns?”

“With guns.” Five confirmed desolately.

“Damn.” Klaus was quiet. “And how do you know they’re going to break in?”

“Because I went to Griddy’s Donuts and intercepted the message, and I know they’ll just send another one even though I took it, and people will still come. With guns, Klaus. So we have to go, because they’ll literally be here any minute. I don’t think I properly conveyed the urgency of this situation, Klaus. We need to get out of the house.”

Above them the sounds of shouting were starting, followed by rapid gunfire.

“AK-47’s.” Klaus muttered absently.

Five glanced at him. “What?”

“The – the gun. An AK-47. The sound it makes, it – it almost sounds like pattering feet mixed with the gun echo in the lobby. Doesn’t matter,” he said at Five’s strange look, “are we going or not?”

Five reached out a hand and Klaus looked at it disdainfully.

“Can I at least finish my coffee first?” he asked, cradling the lukewarm cup of coffee with his free hand.

“Oh, for fucks – give me your goddamn hand, Klaus.” He said, snatching his arm, and they disappeared in a flash of blue light.

Chapter 2: but strangely he feels at home in this place

Summary:

Five was out of blinks. Klaus could see it in the way he was slumped, even as he tried to pull his arm free; he was exhausted. The path was open – they were nearly out the door and nobody had noticed, too preoccupied with their own fights.

Klaus shoved himself up and ran towards Blue and Five, jumping onto the man’s broad back.

The man hissed, pulling his gun from the holster on his belt and aiming it at Klaus.

He pulled the trigger.

or

We love Klaus, but he is an idiot sometimes, you have to agree. Like, a good idiot... but still an idiot.

Notes:

klaus hasn't told his family that he *can't die* yet (oops) but right now i'm full of rage and an urge to create literature so lets go!

also, i can't write fight scenes so sorry but argh

my headcanon is that since his powers weren't super useful in battle, he was better at hand-to-hand-combat than the others, because he didn't have any superpowers or advantages to fall back on. and living on the streets would have helped hone those skills till he was like a super badass 😤👊

chapter title: 'this is home' by woodkid

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Klaus stumbled and almost fell over as he landed on the cold marble of the lobby. Around him, the gunshots had gotten louder, now mingled with the sounds of fighting. He looked over to his left at the living room and saw Allison nursing a lump that was already starting to swell on her jaw. It was obviously hindering her rumouring abilities, which was probably what the lady in the pink mask had been aiming for, but Allison was still an intimidating blur as she lethally whipped through the air, perfectly manicured hands scissoring towards Pink’s abdomen. A gun lay discarded a few feet away. The contents of the magazine were spilled over the floor.

Luther was swinging towards Pink’s head, but she was fast. A knife came out of nowhere, and Klaus looked up to see Diego on the staircase, throwing the knives that were scattered over his body and around him on the steps. She dodged every one. Klaus charged towards her and delivered a sweeping kick, pulling her legs out from under her. She landed on her back, winded. Diego and Luther both stared at Klaus – (did they think he could be homeless for almost half his life and not know how to fight? Or did they think he’d forgotten the gruelling hours of hand-to-hand combat as children?) – and launched themselves at Pink.

She spun, dodging Luther’s shove and Diego’s fist, and twirled right into Klaus’ fist. He pummelled her stomach, leaving her hunched, and landed a solid kick on her lower spine. She was sent spinning to the floor.

Dragging her hand across the centre table, she pulled herself up with a wheeze. Luther ran towards her like a bull, but she dodged and used her momentum to shove Klaus into the wall, hitting his head. He watched dazedly as Five, who had been collecting Diego’s knives for him, blinked into the space directly above Pink’s head. He dropped onto her upper back, pulling them both towards the floor, and blinked out of the way before her head connected, the mask making a resounding crack.

Five was already off running towards Viktor, who was doubled over, the large man with the blue mask advancing towards him. As Klaus watched, he blinked towards the man and landed behind him. He winced as Five skittered around him, teleporting on all sides and landing a hit before disappearing to another side of the man. But Blue predicted where he was going to go and grabbed his arm, and although Five was strong, he was in his 13 year old body and couldn’t pull his arm out of Blue’s firm grip. He struggled as his arm looked like it was almost wrenched out of his socket. Blue pulled him towards the stairway, towards the door that Klaus knew led to a hallway eventually connecting with the alley outside.

Five was out of blinks. Klaus could see it in the way he was slumped, even as he tried to pull his arm free; he was exhausted. The path was open – they were nearly out the door and nobody had noticed, too preoccupied with their own fights. Luther and Diego were still battling Pink, but Diego was almost out of knives again, and Luther couldn’t do much because of how fast the lady was. She weaved through the attacks sent her way like a fish in water. Allison was lying by the staircase, unmoving; she had clearly been thrown there, and Viktor was crouched over her, trying to wake her up and shielding her from the gunshots still scattering throughout the lobby.

Klaus shoved himself up and ran towards Blue and Five, jumping onto the man’s broad back. He knew it was a dumb move but he couldn’t think what else to do – they were almost out the door and then it would have been practically impossible to find Five, without the briefcase the man was clutching. The man growled and tried to shake him off, letting go of Five, who dodged the man’s flailing arms and started trying to punch him. The man flung himself backwards, sending Klaus crashing to the ground, but he immediately got back up and started trying to pummel Blue. His head pounded and he could feel blood trickling down the back of his neck. He thought about his funny shirt, which was probably now ruined.

The mask splintered and the man hissed, pulling his gun from the holster on his belt and aiming it at Klaus.

He pulled the trigger.

Pain ripped through his leg and Klaus collapsed, holding his hand to the blood gushing from the perfectly round, agonising hole in his leg.

“Shit! Klaus!”

Five dropped to his knees beside him, trying to stem the flood, but the man pointed the gun at him and jerked the barrel up. Five slowly rose to his feet, and Klaus almost saw his face go red at the knowledge that he couldn’t blink away. He glanced down at Klaus, already pale from the blood loss, and backed away. The lady in the pink mask had finally been pinned by one of Diego’s knives and the boys were advancing on her, Luther glancing to the side at Allison as she lifted her head towards Blue, confusion clouding her eyes. Klaus saw the moment she registered what was happening and she pulled herself up on the wall, leaving a streak of blood behind.

“Stop!” shouted the man. His gun was still trained on Five, Klaus bleeding out at his feet. “Stop now!”

All the siblings in the room froze when they saw Five held at gunpoint. They knew he wouldn’t kill him, because they needed him, but he had all the time in the world to heal, didn’t he? Really, there was nothing stopping him from shooting him in the gut and just fixing him later, leaving him incapacitated in the meantime. The man reached down and grabbed Klaus’ arm and pulled him up, forcing a pained breath from his lips. Blue aimed his gun at Klaus’ head, his arm around his throat. Klaus watched his family with a practiced eye as their backs stiffened minutely and their fingers flexed into a fist, as Pink finally yanked Diego’s knife out of her jacket and stalked over, holding the sharp blade to Klaus’ throat.

“Don’t.” the man growled as he saw Allison open her mouth. “I’ll shoot.” Diego’s fingers twitched towards his knife tucked into his sleeve. “DON’T!” Blue roared.

Five’s hands curled into fists. The blue glow that always accompanied the jumps was starting to accumulate around his white knuckles. But he needed to gather all his energy to jump, which took more time, and those extra split seconds served as a warning to Blue.

The knife was cold against his skin.

Klaus felt his arm tense as he straightened the gun towards Five’s head.

He shoved away the arm around his neck and ignored the stinging pain as the blade scratched his throat.

He jumped into the bath of the bullet singing towards an unprepared and unprotected Five.

His chest hurt.

He didn’t think about what that meant.

He heard yelling, and two dull thuds as the assassins dropped to the ground, knives embedded hilt-deep in their hearts.

A short burst of pain, and then everything rushed towards him, and the blackness consumed him.

Notes:

thanks for reading :) i know everyone says this but IF YOU HIT THE KUDOS AND COMMENT, EVEN JUST A SMILEY FACE, I WILL TELEPATHICALLY SEND YOU A GLAZED BAGEL (or whatever you prefer i don't judge judge free zone nope no judging here)

probably one more chapter coming! get ready for some ANGST!

Notes:

okay that was a shitshow

im sorry you had to see that

alrighty probably no schedule for now, like i said, exams, but this will probably be 2 or 3 chapters long? i'm sorry but i'm sleep deprived and dehydrated and surviving solely on microwaved reheatable macaroni and praise

comments are suuuper appreciated so i can feel validated as a human and i will try to reply to every one because honestly it will make my day i've never put my writing on the internet before, also feel free to be mean, if i make a spelling or grammar mistake or get something wrong PLEASE TELL ME IT WOULD MAKE ME SO HAPPY TO BE CRITIZED PROMISE I WON'T BE MAD

i am deep into my tua phase and outraged at klaus' character arc and writing fix-its to stem my grief at all the lost potential he had after s2. no one can stop me now. not even god though she can try

okay bye pls sub so you can get updates and i swear i'm actually a better writer than this i'm just v tired and v done