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Chapter Text

Hogsmeade was already covered in snow, but it didn't stop the weather to add a little more powder sugar to the view. It was snowing again, not that anyone would mind in the village. The shop windows were full of with reindeers, Santa Claus and fairy lights. The streets were filled with Christmas carol and the smells of freshly baked gingerbread. These little things inevitably reminded everyone that there were only a few weeks left until Christmas.

Severus Snape wrapped his hands around his mug. He took a deep breath, and his nose the smell of cinnamon, orange, clove filled his nose; It was Rosmerta's perfectly made mulled wine.

He held his mug a bit tighter. The hot what was coming from the mug warmed up his fingers slowly. He was still wearing his fingerless gloves. It even surprised himself how much he loved this piece of clothes. It was a present from Minerva last year. He hated to wearing gloves. He hated that he couldn't move his finger freely; he felt lame, he couldn't make a simple task in gloves, like opening the door or use his wand properly. So he didn't wear gloves, but in the cold his skin got dry, and his hands turned to red. He also hated it. When Minerva gave him these fingerless gloves, he was unsure about it.

"It's a win-win, Severus" explained Minerva "It's like you wearing something, but your fingers are almost free."

And it was true. Of course, these gloves didn't keep his whole hand warm, but it was better than nothing.

He took a sip of his mulled wine and watched the people. Outside two boys, who were wearing Hufflepuff uniform, were kissing and giggling. They certainly didn't need to hold a mug of hot drink to warm themselves up.

"Severus?"

A soft, lovely, oldish voice brought Severus back from his thought, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the young couple. They were tossing and pulling each other, throwing snow in the other face, and then laughing and kissing. They were so happy, so enviable. Severus hated to admit, but he envied them. Before he could be lost in his thought again, somebody gently squeezed his hand.

"You're thinking about him again, aren't you?" asked Minerva quietly. She also saw the happy couple outside. Who doesn't? They were a cheerful picture.

Severus sigh and he finally managed to look away. "Is it that obvious?"

"Oh no, only for me," She chuckled "Have you talked to him yet?"

Severus shook his head. No, he hasn't. That would be the first step, but this little step terrified him. Because speaking carried the possibility that he would be rejected. And Severus would rather face the Dark Lord again than to hear 'No'.

"Why don't you invite him to dinner? Surely, he wouldn't say no for that"

"I don't want to disturb him. I heard, these days, the Aurors have a lot of work. They are overworked and exhausted."

"Yes, I heard that too, and that's why you should ask him. I'm sure he's dying for a quiet evening. Take him to your favourite restaurant."

Severus shook his head again. "He'll say no, I know."

"You don't know that, Severus." said Minerva seriously "Besides, if you never try, you will never know. You have to start somewhere, and I think dinner is a good start. Harry respects you, Severus. He won't say no for a dinner invitation."

Yes, It's the respect why he wouldn't reject him, but that wasn't enough for Severus. He didn't want to spend an evening with Harry just because he didn't want to be impolite to say no.

"Are you finished with your mulled wine? Great! Let's go, help me find the perfect present for Poppy."

"She is your best friend Merlin knows how many years now and it's the same story every Christmas... What to buy for Poppy?"

"Because It's so hard to find a gift for her!"

"Then buy nothing" suggested Severus while he was paying for their drinks.

"That would be rude!"

Severus was so grateful that Minerva had this special ability to distract him. Sometimes the distraction annoyed him, but he didn't mind it. While he was busy to listing all the gift ideas for Poppy, he hasn't been thinking about that he would rather wandering with someone else on these streets.

They were so deep into their conversation in the whole time, and they didn't even notice that someone overheard them. A woman, with brown hair, watched the other two leave the place. Her eyes were burning in a maniac, insane fire and she was rubbing her hands together. There was a kind of sly smirk on her face; even the Devil would step out of her way.

Two days have passed since his meeting with Minerva and Severus couldn't get out of his head what she has said. A dinner... Actually, a dinner wasn't a bad idea. But... Severus couldn't picture himself as he walks into Harry's office and says: Are you free tonight? Because I'd like to invite you to dinner. Please say 'yes' 'cause I won't survive your 'no'!

Pathetic! It was pathetic! He was pathetic!

He slapped the phial down on the table, thanks to the protection he didn't crush it. He leaned over his cauldron, and he was surprised to see that the potion was green. It was supposed to be red at this stage... Did he messed up, or did he created something new? Did he put the dried lizard tails in it? What the hell was he doing in the last half an hour? Certainly not what he should have to... This whole thing was slowly driving him crazy. Severus sighed deeply; he needed to concentrate. He began to examine what was in his cauldron; it looked like he has created a new potion. Excitement washed over him, and the world ceased to exist.

That was the reason why he didn't see that somebody was behind him, pointing a wand the middle of his back. The spell hit him unexpectedly. He fell on his knees; his hands were tied together behind his back. Before he could turn around to see his attacker a hand grabbed his hair and pulled his head back. A spell forced his lips open, and his mouth was filled with a potion, another spell forced him to swallow it. He immediately recognised the taste of the potion; it burned his throat. He wanted to scream but...

"You can thank me later!"

That was the last thing what he had heard; then something covered his mouth and eyes.

The world turned black and dangerously quiet around him.

Chapter Text

"Hey, Harry! We're going to the Two Tiger to have a pint. Would you like to join us?"

Harry looked up from his paperwork, in his door Mark was standing. He was the youngest member of his team, and he reminded Harry about Colin Creevey. He was hyperactive, vivid, cheerful and in the first week Mark couldn't even speak in Harry presence, but after a while, he learnt that Harry was as human as the rest of us, so he chilled down.

"Thanks for the invitation, but I can't. I have much more paperwork than you have, guys."

"That's bullshit!" he said but as soon as he spoke his face flushed. Harry wasn’t their team leader, but they respected him as he was.

“Sorry, but you know that’s bullshit. Come on! Have fun with us!”

“Maybe next time. Don’t drink too much!” Harry smiled, Mark rolled his eyes and walked out of the office.

Harry liked hanging out with his friends but as the night moves further they drank more, and there was always a certain point where they wanted to find a man for him. He put away his paperwork, Mark was actually right, he hadn't got much more work, but today he didn't feel like for partying.

He stepped out of the building of the Ministry of Magic and walked into a blind alley. He pointed his want to the brick wall, and the secret passage to the Diagon Alley has appeared. He went through the passage and stopped on the other side to admire the view.

No matter how was the weather, Diagon Alley always looked so magical. Harry felt silly to call the main street of the Wizarding Community magical, but he couldn't find a better attributive. The snow-covered street looked like just a perfectly made postcard. It was heavily snowing, Harry pulled his coat tighter and started to walking across along the street. Christmas fairy lights were running from door to door made the whole scene more surreal.

Harry was grateful for the snow because he had a reason to hide behind his scarf. Keeping his eyes down, manoeuvring through the mass he looked like just one of the wizards who was doing their daily or Christmas shopping. But this time he wasn't interested in shopping, he was walking straight to the last shop of Diagon Alley. The building was standing empty for a long time because right next to it the Knockturn Alley has started. After the war, the Knockturn Alley wasn't that dark and dangerous, but it was still the heart of the crimes. That's why it was the perfect shop for Severus Snape. The front door was on the Diagon Alley that suggested that the shop was safe - which was true - and there was a back door in the dark allowing to do some not exactly lawful business.

Harry stepped into the shadow of the doorway and looked up to the shop. It was renovated seven months ago but still looked like an old house; wizards like to keep their buildings to look like ancient. The poison green painting perfectly matched with Severus' taste and letters in the shop name - The Prince's Potions Lab - reminded Harry of Severus' potions book. Harry looked up at the signboard; it was simple but elegant. Silver-grey background, green letters with white highlights. The emblem was a drop shaped phial with a label TPPL on it. Many people didn’t notice, but there was a little bolt shape on it. Harry, at first sight, saw this little sign, but he didn’t really know what does it mean.

He perfectly remembered that day when he ran into Severus, and the man told him he has difficulty with the Ministry. Actually, Harry remembered every single time when they met. At such times even the longest corridor seemed only two steps long and the half an hour break was only five minutes. No matter when was the last time they had talked they could continue where they left. But there was always a certain point – when Harry break was over, or they reached the end of the corridor – they just looked at each other, and they didn’t know what to say. At those moments Severus always cleared his throat and said the same thing “It was a pleasure to meet with you, Mr Potter, take care of yourself.”

Usually, Harry didn’t interfere in Severus’ life, but when he heard that there are some idiots, in the Department of the Magical Liquids, hinder the shop opening, he got furious. He rushed into the department and started to yelling with everyone that Severus Snape is a war hero and they cannot treat him like this. The next week the Ministry gave Severus green light to the opening.

Harry studied all the windows, but everything was dark. Generally, he spent around 15 minutes hiding in the dark and watching the man closing his shop, but this time he arrived late. Severus has already gone home, and Harry missed the opportunity to admire him secretly. He sighed sadly and apparated to home.

On that evening, Harry was sitting on the couch and enjoying a glass of perfectly made blueberry elf wine when he heard that his front door opened and closed. He wasn't particularly surprised; there were only a few people who knew where he lived and they had the right to walk in Harry’s house without knocking. So it was perfectly normal, but when he hadn’t heard any approaching footsteps he called out, but there wasn’t any answer.

“Ron? Is that you?” he called out. Some strange noises caught his attention. It was like somebody tried to get up and fall back to the ground He drew out his wand and took a step closer to the door.

“Ron, I swear to Merlin, if you’re drunk again I’m gonna hex you so badly.”

He took another step forward slowly. He knew that at his home he was safe, but he was an Auror, and the war had taught him to be ready for any attacks. He took a deep breath and stepped out of the living-room ready to face with anything.

He was prepared for everything, really, but not for that.

Severus Snape, half-naked, wearing only a black boxer, was on his knees, his hands were tied behind his back, and his mouth was covered with a green ribbon. There was another green ribbon what was running along his legs, and arms ended up a big bow on his chest. Harry just stood there half mesmerised half terrified by the view, and he didn’t really know what to do. Severus seemed to sense that somebody was watching him, he lifted his head, and his eyes met Harry’s. In his eyes, there were fear, panic, and shame and he started to shake his head when Harry stepped closer. But Harry couldn’t stop himself; he wanted to help the man even if he perfectly understood that Severus didn’t want anyone to see him in this state, so he rushed to his ex-professor and moved the ribbon out of his mouth.

"Who did this with you?"

"Granger," Severus said and immediately tried to move away from Harry, but the front door stopped him. As Severus leaned back, Harry saw a little card what was attached to the green bow: 'Enjoy your gift, Harry!'

Harry was kneeling in front of his ex-professor, he felt his face flushed. He was totally embarrassed by the fact that he has a friend who was capable do something like this. He looked up at Severus, who tried to lean as far as he can from Harry. He was still shaking his head, and he looked at Harry despairingly, like a horde of Dementor was behind him.

Harry looked into Severus' beautiful onyx eyes, and he immediately knew that something was terribly wrong. Severus' pupils were too big, and he was glancing up between Harry's eyes, but he couldn't really focus. Harry leaned forward, cupped Severus' face and gently pulled him closer.

"Your eyes..." he whispered and caressed the soft skin "She gave something to you, right?"

"Yes"

Still holding Severus' face and didn't break the eye contact Harry tried to find the answers to his unasked questions. What happened that made Severus that terrified and vulnerable? When Harry spoke again, his voice was barely above a whisper.

"What did she give to you?"

"My own Veritaserum."

Chapter Text

"What did she give to you?"

"My own Veritaserum."

Shocked by the answer Harry released Severus' face; he felt completely helpless, he leaned forward, and rest his forehead on Severus' left shoulder.

“Do you have the antidote?”

“No,” Severus whispered, his breath tickled Harry’s neck.

“Can you brew it?”

“Yes, but it takes hours to make. The potion’s effect will wear off before I finish the brewing.”

The silence that settled on them was heavier than Hagrid’s winter coat. Moments have passed, and nothing changed. Two bodies leaned against each other, two rhythmically beating hearts, soft breath dancing on the other's skins, and the massive silent. It could have been perfect, but the anger has raised in Harry, and he unexpectedly hit his fist into the door with full force. Severus jerked away from Harry’s outburst of anger.

“Sorry,” he mumbled and studied his hand. Luckily, the loud crack noise was only the door. After making sure his hand wasn't broken, Harry moved closer to Severus and tried to untie the knot on his wrist. First, he tried with simple muggle way; untie it with his hand but when that didn’t work he decided to use magic. It was also an unsuccessful try.

"It won't work. It linked to the potions. When the Veritaserum wears off, my hands will be free again."

Harry huffed angrily, and for a moment Severus thought he’d hit the door or the wall again, but Harry stood up and helped Severus to stand too.

“Alright then, let’s make you feel a bit more comfortable, shall we?”

He stepped back, pointed his wand at Severus’s chest and the green bow disappeared. While the purpose was to make Severus relaxed, this little action even made Harry distracted too. Now, Severus was more naked, wearing only his black boxer what was perfectly fit on his body. Harry blushed when he realised that he was eyeing Severus and his gaze was fixed on his hips. He turned his head, pointed his wand at him and cast a clothes summoning spell. From the corner of his eyes, he saw that nothing happened. He turned back and cast the spell again and again, but he didn’t make any progress. He summoned one of his t-shirts what was big enough for Severus and tried to put on him, but when the cloth got near Severus, it fell on the floor.

He threw his hand in the air, “Let me guess. This is also linked to the potion.”

“I think so.”

Harry turned to the hall cabinet, and he was resting his hand on it. There was a vase with dry flowers and a glass ashtray with some coins on it. Severus, unfortunately, knew too well this posture. This is when you don’t know what to do because of the helpless anger. Harry sighed, and Severus hoped that he wouldn’t reach the point where he started to break things – like Severus usually did – but when Harry’s hand twitched he knew what would come. He tried to move his hand to stop him, but it was useless. Harry swept off the vase, and the ashtray from the cabinet, both of them flew across the hall to slammed into the wall.

“Potter,” said Severus in a calm voice when he saw that Harry was trying to throw the cabinet too. Harry sighed again and looked up at Severus; his eyes were on fire.

“What the hell is wrong with that woman? he shouted, “Why did she do this to you?"

"Because..." said Severus but he immediately closed his mouth. The pain spread through his body and he clenched his teeth. ‘I can resist. I can resist’ he chanted to himself, but he perfectly knew that he wasn’t strong enough. No one was strong enough. He has perfected the potion; he made it to be stronger, to be irresistible and now he learnt it from the horse’s mouth how success he was. He silently fought against the potion, but the soreness was getting unbearable, he fell back on his knees and cried out in pain.

"Don't answer it!" ordered Harry and kneeled down next to Severus. But the potion wasn't working that way; you can’t command it not to work. The question was asked, and it needed to be answered. Severus began to retch from the struggle; he didn’t want to scream or answer.

"Does the - Does the Draught of Peace contain moonstone?"

"Yes," sighed Severus in relief.

Harry was surprised that trick actually worked. He waited until Severus’ breathing was steady again and helped the man stand on his feet. He summoned one of his robes, made it big enough for Severus and covered the other man’s body. When he made sure that only Severus' feet are visible, he stepped back and looked puzzled at Severus. 'And now what?' Harry thought. Before the silence became awkward he blurted out, "Are you hungry?"

"Yes," said Severus immediately and he blushed and Harry just watched him like he was some kind of miracle. Severus sighed and turned his head. When he spoke again, his voice was broken.

"Yes, I'm hungry. I missed lunch because I was working on a potion and I didn't think..."

"It's okay," interrupted Harry "I have some chicken left from my lunch if it's ok..." and with that Harry turned around and walked into the kitchen. Harry didn't want to be impolite, but he was actually afraid to speak with the man. He was afraid that he would say something and the potion in Severus' system would force the man to talk.

Severus hesitantly looked from the front door to the kitchen. He was glad that Harry tried to act calm and maturate in this situation and didn't even think of taking advantage of him, but eating in a state like this was something that Severus couldn't picture. He walked after Harry and stopped at the door. In the kitchen, Harry was already taking out plastic boxes from the fridge onto the kitchen counter.

"Maybe you've already forgotten, but my hands are tied up."

Harry turned back and shyly smiled at Severus.

"We managed to win a war; I think we could manage to eat dinner even like this"

Severus stepped into the kitchen and expected that the stone floor would be cold, but it wasn't. He knew that Harry was a caring person and he always imagined that in a relationship he would be attentive with his partner but Severus wouldn't have thought that Harry would pay attention, such a little thing like, to warm up the kitchen stone floor. He walked to the table, pulled out one of the chairs with his foot, sat down and watched how Harry was preparing their food. Cutleries, napkins, two glass of wine and a jug of water were flying to the table. After two minutes’ silence work, Harry put a plate on the table and sat next to Severus.

Severus didn't recognise what kind of food was on the plate because all he can saw was Harry's hand; how he picked up the fork, put a piece of meat on it, and offered to him. Severus's face immediately turned to the deepest red that ever existed in the World; he wished the ground would swallow him up. During his life, he saw many things and experienced even more, but he never felt this embarrassed before.

"It's so humiliating" he murmured as he bowed his head.

Harry put down the fork and gently touched Severus' arm, "I'm sorry..."

"Don't apologise; it's not your fault."

"But it is."

"Why? Did you ask Miss Granger to drug me, kidnap me and wrap me as a Christmas gift?"

"Merlin! No! But she's my friend."

Severus lifted up his head and saw that Harry was sitting head down, although he saw only Harry's neck, it was slightly pink, it was obvious, he was embarrassed too. They could sit here in the most awkward silence, or they could eat dinner in a bit more pleasant atmosphere and maybe talk. So Severus took a deep breath and turned to Harry. Because of he couldn't reach out to the man and lift up his head. Therefore Severus put his foot on Harry's.

"Harry, everyone is responsible only for their actions. What your friends are doing it's not your problem," he said and smiled at Harry who straightaway looked up when he heard his name.

"So tell me what are we eating, because it smells really good."

Chapter Text

"So tell me what are we eating, because it smells really good."

Severus didn’t pay too much attention what Harry had put on the table, but after the mouth-watering scents, he looked down. It wasn’t just some reheated leftover on the plate. It looked like a master chef put all the food there, like in a fancy, romantic restaurant where usually couples go on Valentine’s day.

Harry smiled shyly and picked up the fork again and pointed to each food as he described them.

"Well, this is stuffed and rolled up boneless chicken legs wrapped in bacon and fried in olive oil. This is a cheese sauce and here are some grilled vegetables. It’s really nothing, just something simple what I cooked yesterday."

Severus raised his eyebrow. ‘Something simple’ Harry said... This wasn't simple... When he cooked something simple, it was spaghetti with tomatoes sauce, but stuffed chicken and cheese sauce weren't simple for Severus.

"You are telling me that you cooked this?" Severus sounded a little bit of too surprise as he wanted to. Harry nodded.

"Hm... Now I'm curious. Let me taste it."

Harry put the piece of chicken on the fork and dipped into the cheese sauce and lift to Severus’ mouth. He tried so hard not to stare the man's lips when the fork disappeared in his mouth. Severus closed his eyes and silently enjoyed the first bite of his dinner.

"This is delicious," he said, "Who taught you to cook?"

Harry smiled at him and put another piece of chicken on the fork, then he lifted to his mouth and ate it. Severus felt his mouth went dry. When Harry began to put vegetables on the fork, Severus knew it was for him, and soon his lips would touch the same thing what was in Harry's mouth just a moment ago. He almost moaned to that thought, and he was happy that his lower body part was hidden under the table. His face started to burn when Harry offered the vegetables. It was just like they had kissed, and because of this thought, Severus wanted to giggle and then wanted to slap himself for being a sentimental lovesick idiot. Luckily, Harry didn't notice anything about this.

"Molly. She always goaded on me to learn cooking, but you can imagine. I was young, and I had just won a war; I thought that I could do anything, and cooking wouldn’t be that hard. After my graduation, I moved in; everything was perfect in the first two weeks because I didn’t eat at home. I grabbed some takeaway on the way home, or I ate somewhere in the city. But once I had a quiet Friday evening, and I felt like I want to eat an omelette for dinner. A simple four egg omelettes, what could go possibly wrong? Well, everything…"

Harry pointed to the ceiling with the fork, Severus looked up. Above the stove, there was a rather big black spot.

"What happened?" asked Severus curiously.

"Honestly? I don’t know. I put the fry-pan on the fire and poured a little oil in it, as I remember, and then I turned around to prepare the eggs. The next thing I remember was the smoke and when I turned back half of my kitchen was on fire."

"Did you get injured?"

"Almost. I was just standing there in shock and didn't know what to do, but Kreacher saved me. Although, he was in Hogwarts his magic is still connecting with the house, and when he sensed that something was wrong, he came here. He just snapped his finger two times, and all the smoke and fire was gone. He wanted to clean the wall too, but I asked him to leave the black spot there to remind me of my stupidity. Next day I dashed into the Burrow, and I demanded Molly to teach me everything."

Severus smiled, he knew how Harry could act when he really wanted something.

"And then?"

"Well... Do you remember my first potion lesson?"

"Yes, it sometimes haunts me in my dreams that you almost cut down your finger," said Severus immediately. Suddenly he felt embarrassed how openly he answered, he turned his head to hide his flushed face, but luckily again, Harry didn't notice or didn't want to notice Severus' reaction.

"Let me tell you I was as incompetent in the kitchen as in the potions classroom," admitted Harry smiling and began to tell how Molly though him how to hold a knife, how to cut meats, vegetables, or what's the difference between cooking, steaming, and boiling. He told Severus about his first omelette what he made utterly alone, and how he became Molly's little helper during the Sunday's Weasley meals. Harry just talked and talked, one story after another and Severus only interrupted him when he asked for a glass of wine or water or the napkin. After a while, Severus also began to tell stories about how Albus convinced him to go to the Order meeting.

"He knew me too well. Sometimes it was enough one comment about what Molly would cook, and Albus knew that I would be there," laughed Severus.

Harry was still feeding themselves with the very same fork, one bite to Severus and another for himself. As the food was disappearing off the plate, so the atmosphere was turning to more light. When they ate up everything, Harry poured another glass of wine themselves and suggested to move to the living-room. Severus' embarrassment slowly faded away, he didn't know it was because of the wine, or because he felt safe in Harry's company, but to be honest, he didn't really care. First, he thought this evening would be a disaster, but at that moment, it seemed to be a rather pleasant one.

They went into the living-room, and Severus noticed that the floor was also warmer here. Harry took a sip of his wine and put the glass on the table next to Severus'. When Harry sat back, he caressed his barefoot to Severus', who thought it was totally accidentally. He was waiting for Harry to blush and apologise, but Harry smiled at him softly and continued tenderly stroking Severus' foot. Moreover, he started a conversation as nothing has happened.

"You said you were working on something when… So when this happened to you. What are you working on nowadays?"

"I’m researching for the St. Mungo," answered Severus quietly, he wasn't sure how his voice would sound like loud when Harry was playing with his foot fingers like that. "I’m a part of a team who try to find the cure for the Banshee Virus."

"I’ve never heard about that."

"It’s a childhood disease and unfortunately very common in the Wizarding World. You didn't hear about it because usually, it affects children who were raised up in wizardry community. Luckily there's a cure for it, but it’s a long and complicated process. The potion is rather easy to make but… Well, try to convince a sick toddler to drink a disgusting potion," Severus smiled, "But we have already made some progress. I successfully create an extract that you can mix in the food, so they don’t taste the potion. However, the main goal is making a potion for prevention."

It was good to see that there were more and more people who trusted Severus knowledge and they could leave the past behind. Working for the St. Mungo was a good advertisement, and Severus truly needed that.

This was the moment when Severus thought he would turn the table. He pulled out his leg from Harry's and now it was him, who was gently caressing the other. There was only one tiny second when the shock appeared in Harry's eyes, but the next moment it was gone.

"What do you like more, creating a new potion or finding the cure?"

"Finding the cure," replied Severus without hesitation and he leaned a bit closer to Harry.

"But why? Creating something new, something unique what nobody has ever done before... Isn’t it more interesting?" asked Harry and he also leaned closer.

"New things usually were created by a mishap. Did you know the invention of the champagne was only an accident?" Harry shook his head "Well, yes Dom Pérignon was just lucky, and I also when I've ever created a new potion. It was just because I accidentally mixed up something and instead of blowing up my lab there was a good result. But finding a cure… It’s different. You make research, theories, and test them. You know the diseases, you know the symptoms, and you’re taking it slowly apart. You examine every little detail. Every tiny part is a little mystery what you have to solve. It’s more interesting and exciting than randomly mixing things in a cauldron."

Harry knew for the first time he has ever heard Severus talking about potions that Severus was obsessed with this topic, in the good sense of the word. It wasn't actually true he didn't like Potions in school. He didn't like the brewing part, but he could have listened to Severus for hours as he speaks about ingredients, preparing and cutting, methods, and all the other stuff.

"This is why you like brewing potions?" asked Harry after he listened to Severus almost 20 minutes talking about his achieved results.

"Yes, and because brewing helps me think."

"But Severus, you are brewing all the time!" laughed Harry, "What can you think about so much?"

"Usually, I’m thinking about..."

"What’s the emblem of the Slytherin house?" interrupt Harry

"A snake."

Harry stood up and began to pace up and down in the living-room, he was muttering something under his nose, but Severus didn’t understand what he was saying. He wasn’t sure, but maybe he heard that Harry said ‘idiot’ in a few times. After two minutes, when Harry has already walked a path in his rug, Severus timidly ask what happened.

"Harry? What’s wrong?"

Harry stopped and looked up at Severus as he has just asked the stupidest question ever.

"What's wrong? Everything! This…" Harry made a gesture with his hand pointing at Severus and then maybe at himself, but Severus wasn’t sure because Harry threw his hands in the air. "This is wrong! So wrong! I’m an idiot. How can I be that stupid? I forget... I thought everything is fine, but you’re not fine! This is not fine!"

Severus did his best to follow Harry’s maunderings, but all he has understood was that suddenly Harry thought sitting on a couch with him was wrong. He opened his mouth to ask Harry to calm down, but Harry held up his hand.

"Don’t! Just don’t! I shouldn’t have… You have no idea how much I want this, but not like that! I want you to smirk at me, I want your mysterious half-answers, and I want your 'no's and 'maybe's. Do you understand? I'd like to get to know you bit by bit, but this... I don't want like this! I'm sorry!"

Severus like a trapped, scared little animal was looking at Harry. The younger man was only within arm's reach, and he wanted to reach out for him, pull him back to next to him, hugged him and never let him go, because at that moment somehow Severus had the terrible feeling that he’s about to lost Harry forever. But the damn curse and rope held his hand tightly together behind his back.

"I think, it’s better if I go, you just stay here until… You know until…"

"Wait!" said Severus devastated, but Harry didn't hear that he ran out of the room upstairs to his bedroom. He shut the door and threw himself on the bed. The mixture feelings of self-hate, angriness, and sadness washed over him, and he began to sob like never before. He let himself believe that they were just having a nice dinner together, talking like friends, or maybe more than friends, and he hated himself for forgetting the fact that Severus was cursed, and he didn’t answer all his question because he wanted to.

Eventually, Harry fell asleep, and it was already after midnight when he woke up. He went downstairs; the whole house was deadly silent. In the living room, he found their two glasses of half drank wine, next to them there was a rope what came off Severus’ hand when the potion’s effect wore off. Harry sat down on the couch and started to cry again.

Chapter Text

Minerva stepped out of the gate and patiently waited for the school's protection to be whole again, then she started to walk down to Hogsmeade. Everything was covered in snow and the way to the village she was crooning some Christmas songs. She was in a good mood, not just because the holiday was just around the corner or because - thanks to Severus - she found the perfect gift for Poppy. No, she was in a good mood because she was going to meet with Severus. It was only a few days ago when they had their usual weekly meeting, and this morning Severus sent a message that he wanted to meet again. It was good to see that Severus wanted to be more sociable.

She walked into the Three Broomsticks and happily waved to Rosmerta. Severus was sitting at their usual spot, he seemed a bit jumpy, but that was normal because he was acting like that when he was alone in a public place.

"Hello Severus, it's good to see you again," She greeted him and sat down, "I was so surprised - " Minerva stopped talking when Severus held up his hand, he cast a spell, and the pub's noise faded away. Minerva raised an eyebrow and gave a questioning look to Severus when he cast a shield.

"That's enough!" said Minerva in a teacher tone and put her hand on Severus' when he started to cast a third protecting charm, "What's this all about?" she asked.

Severus put down his wand and looked around. He let out a long sigh and looked at his friend who was watching him worryingly. In his head the plan seemed so easy: Invite Minerva to the Tree Broomstick, and ask her if she slipped out your secret and if yes, why. But in reality, it wasn't that easy. Deep down at his hear he knew it wasn't Minerva, because she swore on her Gryffindor heart that he would never tell anyone, but Severus couldn't convince himself. Because there was this what if! What if it was her? He wasn't afraid to ask; he was scared of the answer because he knew, he couldn't forgive to Minerva even if her intention was good and he didn't want to lose his only close friend.

"Minerva, you are my friend, and I know you care about me. So I promise I’ll try to understand your motives if it was you…" he paused and held his breath in. Minerva eyebrows were even higher, then Severus breath out and asked,  "Minerva is it possible that you told anyone, accidentally or directly, that I have feelings for Harry?"

"No, of course not!" snapped Minerva a bit louder than she planned, "Sorry. You know, I don’t gossip, and I didn't tell anyone as you asked me. Not even Poppy, who is my best friend."

Severus took a few deep breaths. It wasn't Minerva. It WAS NOT Minerva! The relief washed over him, but the joy only lasted a minute. But if it wasn’t her, then how Ganger found out? He hasn’t told anyone. Was this just a prank? Was this just a Gryffindor revenge because he was terrible with Harry and his friends at school? But if it was revenge why was Harry so gentle with him all along?

"I thought you trust me" she added sadly.

"I do, Minerva, but I had to ask."

"Why? Did something happen?"

Severus closed his eyes and sighed, "I was kidnapped a few days ago."

"WHAT? How and why? Did you get hurt?"

Minerva almost stood up to check if Severus has injuries, but the man stopped her.

"Only my pride," said Severus sadly and began to tell the story how Ganger broke into his laboratory, drugged him and everything. He told Minerva how Harry reacted, how caring he was and how he made Severus feel safe. He also told her about the dinner, and the talking in the living-room, even the barefoot touches. Minerva listened and got more terrified as the story went by and now she understood why Severus put up protection spells around their table.

"But there’s something I don't understand," said Severus after one-hour talking. "Everything was perfect until a certain point; I was talking about my recent research when Harry interrupted me with a stupid question and started maundering about how wrong was that He and I were sitting on his couch, and then he ran out of the room and left me there. I don’t understand what have I done to upset him?"

Minerva smiled softly at Severus. He was great in many things, making potions, doing researches, fighting and being a spy, and even in teaching but with emotions and relationships, he was like an amateur. But Minerva couldn't blame him. He only got a little love in his life, and Severus often suspect that people want something from him if they are kind to him. Minerva remembered how hard she had to fight for Severus' friendship and she remembered clearly how shocked was Severus when he realised that he has feelings for Harry. He was scared, and he wanted to rid of his feeling magically, but luckily he didn't succeed.

"I think when Harry said 'this is wrong' he meant that you were talking about yourself when you were under the effect of the Veritaserium, and he was afraid that you said something unwillingly."

"But I wasn't! I mean I was, but I didn’t mind to talk about my job."

 “Yes, but he didn’t know that! Maybe during the evening, he forgot what happened, and maybe you were more open than your usual self, and it reminded him what situation you were. And perhaps he felt that he took advantage of your situation and that’s why he ran off."

"Do you think so?" asked Severus and he was immediately lost in his thought, he turned his gaze to the door while he was thinking.

"Maybe you're right," he said after a few minutes of silence, "because Harry is…." Severus gasped, "here."

"What?"

"He is here! For Salazar sake, I can’t face him right now. I’m not ready to face him!" Severus panicked and picked up the menu from the table and hid behind it. Minerva turned around in confusion, and she saw how Harry nodded to Rosmerta, ran through the room, and disappeared in the back of the pub. It was unnecessary for Severus to hide. Harry was more upset to see anything or anybody; he didn’t even look around.

"Let's go!" said Minerva and pulled up Severus off the chair and started dragging him to the back of the pub. There were the storage and some private rooms for meetings. They arrived at the corridor just in time to see which door was slammed.

"What are you doing?" asked Severus after Minerva pushed him behind a wine barrel.

"Finding answers!"

She cast a spell on the wall, and it turned to invisible; they could see what was going on the room, but the others didn’t know that. Severus didn't want to spy on Harry, but when he saw Granger in the room along with Weasley he cast a spell to hear what they were talking about.

".... hell is wrong with you?" roared Harry. He was pacing up and down in the room;  Severus has never seen the other man this angry. Even the windows were shaking a bit. But it looked like Hermione didn’t hear Harry’s roar, or she didn’t want to hear it.

"What's going on?" asked Ron looking back and forth between Harry and Hermione.

"I've got bored of Harry’s wailing," Hermione said and waved with her hand saying 'oh it's nothing special'; she crossed her legs and continued in a chat voice, "so I gave him the best Christmas present ever. Considering the bags under his eyes, he enjoyed really much. This is what are friends for, or not?"

She smiled and gave Ron the 'I know and do everything right' look what Severus hated the most when he used to teach the girl. Severus felt his stomach flip, and he was afraid that he would throw up into Rosmerta's perfectly made Blueberry wine because of the disgust and anger. It looked like, Ron also wasn't impressed by her.

"What did she give it to you?" he asked, and Severus could see that he was already afraid of the answer. Harry stopped walking, looked at Ron and pointing his finger at Hermione.

"She! She kidnapped Snape, drugged him with his own Veritaserum! And it wasn't enough she undressed and tied him; she put a fucking green bow on him and left him in my hall with a note 'Enjoy your gift'!"

"Bloody hell!" Ron turned his gaze to the woman; it was impossible to tell what emotions were playing on his face because it changed to fast.

"So, did you enjoy it?" asked Hermione curiously with a mystifying smile.

"No Hermione, I didn't!" shouted Harry and the water jug on the table exploded, "I haven't slept in days, because I keep myself busy to not think. Because if I have a free moment I saw the man who I love and respect the most kneeling in my hall, helplessly with fear his eyes! I cried myself to sleep every night! You ruined everything!"

"Oh Come on!" Her voice was annoyed like when somebody didn't know how to do their homework, "He is interested in you. I heard when he was talking about you with McGonagall. All you had to do was just ask him. He couldn't have denied it, that's why I gave the Veritaserum to him."

"Do you hear yourself when you are talking like this?"

Hermione just sighed, "Okay, maybe I overstepped the line a bit."

"A bit?" snapped Ron, "A bit? Do you understand who did you kidnapped? Snape is a Merlin First Class awarded War Hero! You could be arrested and spend the rest of your life in Azkaban if he reports this to the Aurors. Oh, and don't forget that he was a Death Eater. May he didn't want to do things in lawfully way. His revenge could be painful and horrible; in the end, we will find your remain piece in a matchbox."

Severus smirked in the dark. Ronald’s idea wasn't far from the truth, except that Severus wouldn't bother with the matchbox.

"Don't be overdramatic, Ron; he won't do that. Not now, when he knows he has a chance with Harry. We just have to find out our next move."

Harry clenched his fist and tried to calm down his magic, which seemed impossible, even Severus could feel Harry’s pulsing magic in the corridor. Somehow he managed not to blow up the room and Hermione.

"We are not finding out anything together! I’m done with you! You don’t understand, do you? You think, just because you are clever and you have read more books than the rest of us you can do anything and you know everything! You think just because everybody calls you Miss-Know-it-all - which is an insult, not a compliment - you have every rights to interfere with others life or give them advice! You know perfectly how much he means to me, how much I care for him and how long I… Argh… I don’t even know why I’m trying to explain this to you. It’s clear that you don’t understand because if you did, you would not ruin everything. Your next and only move will be to get the fuck out of this room and my life too!"

Harry wasn’t yelling; his calm, deep voice and his pulsing magic made him more dreadful. Even Severus, who watched him grow up, taught and trained him and perfectly knew what he was capable shivered in the dark. But Hermione only tilted her head, watched Harry for a long moment, and she resentfully walked out of the room.

When she stepped out to the corridor Minerva stepped in front of Severus; it wasn't clear if she wanted to protect him or stop him from attacking Hermione. They silently watched Hermione's leaving, and they would surely watch the empty corridor for some time if a heart-breaking sob didn't get their attention back to the room.

In the room Harry was sitting at the table, he buried his head in his hands, and his whole body was shaking from the crying. Ron was sitting next to him and woodenly hugged him. For tiny moment jealousy washed over Severus, but when Ron spoke, he let himself relax.

"Don't worry mate; we will fix this."

“How Ron? How? This is unfixable."

“Unfixable, is that an actual real word?" teased Ron, he hoped that his humour would cheer Harry up.

"Who the fuck cares?! Can you imagine, how terrible was seeing him like that? I have never seen even his wrist, and now he was in front of me completely naked… He will never speak to me again. Maybe he will never leave his potion lab again!"

"Does he have a good body?" joked Ron again, but it didn’t work.

"You are not helping!"

"I know. I'm sorry mate; I'm terrible at comforting."

Ron patted his friend back. He wasn’t like his mother, who always knew what to say to sad people.

"Do you think he will report Hermione?"

"Honestly? I don’t know, and I don’t care, but if he does, I won’t stop him."

Ron nodded in agreement.

"You know it could be possible that she might be right," said Ron carefully, “You know how she always had a good sense of figuring out other’s feelings and... Maybe Snape really has feelings for you."

Harry pushed his friend away and looked at him like he had lost his mind.

"Ron, my life is falling apart! Can you stop protecting your girlfriend? I know this situation is suck, but I need my best friend right now."

"First of all, I’m not protecting her. Second of all, she isn’t my girlfriend anymore, and third - "

"What? You broke up?" Harry was surprised. Ron was so in love with Hermione since he was 13 and he forgave a lot of things, and Harry thought that he would never make that step.

"Yes."

"Why didn't you told me?"

Ron apologetically smiled,  "We were a bit busy in the last few weeks. Catching that maniac serial killer seemed more important than my pathetic love life."

Harry placed his hand on Ron's shoulder, he really wanted to say 'I'm sorry, mate' but the truth was he wasn't sorry. Ron deserve better, and there was a time when Harry thought that Hermione would be the best for his best friend, but those time passed after the war.

"But how and when?"

"Three weeks ago or so," Ron shrugged his shoulder, "We were in a restaurant and the middle of the meal she turned back and started to giving relationship advice to a couple who, of course, wasn't too happy about the lecture. The dinner turned into a disaster. The man was shouting at us, Hermione kept telling them that their pathetic sex life is the reason why their relationship isn't working, and I was standing between them. I apologised to the man, the restaurant owner, I paid double, and on the road to home, I told her that I had enough of her attitude. When I said I want to break up with her I thought she would cry, but no. She just walked away. And guess what? A few days later she told me that she heard that Lavender is single again and I should ask her out... She is completely mental."

Harry let out a little laughed and he looked away. His gaze wasn't fixed on anything he was just looking into the nothing, and suddenly the silence became heavy. After all the shouting and loud crying, it looked like the world stopped moving. Severus stepped out from behind the barrel and took one more step forward. In the room, Harry closed his eyes, took a deep breath and trying to hold back the tears. He thought he didn't have tears to cry, but he was wrong. As long as his heart was hurting his eyes were making more tears. He looked down, and suddenly millions of salty drops were rolling down on his face, but no sound left his mouth. His silent crying was more horrible than his sobbing and Severus felt his heart broke to as many pieces as tears were flowing down on Harry's cheek.

Minerva gently grasped his elbow, and she started to pull Severus away.

"Come," she said softly, "You will sleep in the Castle tonight."

Chapter Text

Severus did spend that night in the castle and the next one, and another one. It looked like, Harry was right, and he didn't want to place a foot outside.

He didn't remember too much after Minerva pulled him outside the pub. He let himself guided to the castle, to Minerva's guest room. Minerva pushed him down to the bed, took off his shoes and told him to sleep. It wasn't too late, but he took off his robe, lay down and fell asleep in his clothes.

The next morning when Severus woke up, he decided not to think about what happened, but when he realised that he slept in his clothes, the memories came back. Minerva's knowing smile, Granger's impertinence, Ronald's support toward Harry and Harry's anger, shouts, and cry. He closed his eyes, and he clearly saw how Harry was sitting at the table, helplessly crying. Then he remembered how Minerva pulled him through the snow-covered Hogsmeade and pushed him down to the bed, told him to sleep and Severus just like a well-behaved child obeyed. He felt his face flushed. Who would have thought that living with emotions would be this complicated?

He took a shower and cast a refreshing charm on his clothes so now they looked and smelled like they were freshly washed. He called for his favourite house-elf, but he wasn't sure the creature would answer for him. When Minky appeared in the room and recognised who called, she forgot all her rules and ran to her old master and hug his leg. Severus leaned down and petted the little elf's head. He asked for breakfast, and Minky fell on her own feet trying to fulfil her master's request.

While Severus was eating his breakfast, what was enough for half of the Weasley clan he listened to the little elf's talking about the news and the latest gossip in the school. By the end of the meal, Severus knew that Hufflepuff has the most house points, and Slytherin won the last Quidditch match, but their new head of the house is a looser and not as great as Severus was. The new Professor didn't do house meetings or talk with his snakes, and he didn't have time to brew potions for the Infirmary because he has so much to do. But according to Minky the young professor always had time to go out and drink.

So that's how he found out that his old potions laboratory was unused. After the breakfast, he locked himself up in there and started to brew potions for Poppy. This is how he spent the last three days. Hiding, brewing, eating, brewing, sleeping, brewing, brewing and no thinking! He refused to think.

On the fourth day, Minerva had enough of Severus' behaviour.

"Go home Severus," she said as a greeting when she walked into the lab. Severus put down the stirring rod and looked up.

"Are you throwing me out?"

"No, of course not," she said defensively, then she looked around in the room. When she saw twelve new stoppered potions in a box, she shook her head, "You know what? Yes, I do!"

"You said I'm always welcome here."

"And it's true! You are welcome here if you need to use the library for research or if you want to talk or need anything. But you cannot stay here for hiding."

"I'm not hiding. I heard that your new "Potions master" is too busy to make potions for the Infirmary, so I'm just helping Poppy out."

Helping Poppy out means Severus had brew enough potions for the next years too. Poppy even needed to add an extra cupboard to her storage.

"Is that so?" she asked and curiously peeked into the cauldron, "And what are you brewing now?"

"This? Oh, it's my newest experiment!" said Severus excitedly," I try to make a potion that decreases the vampire's bloodlust. I have this idea awhile that the bitter beetroot extract mixed with unicorn tears could calm down their hunger. Did you know that unicorn has…" Minerva gave a stern look to Severus who blushed and threw his hands in the air, "All right! I'm hiding. Are you happy now?"

Minerva sighed; no, she wasn't happy. After the war, she promised Severus that everything would be fine. That people soon would realise he wasn't an evil man. She was glad how everybody slowly opened up to him, how his business was blooming but moreover, she was pleased that Harry still supported Severus; he did it silently, from the shadow. He was the first person who started to order from Severus and telling everybody at the Auror Department his potions are the best. Minerva looked down at the table. Besides the two cauldrons, the phials and many ingredients, there was an empty matchbox.

"You don't plan to make painful revenge like Mr Weasley has imagined, do you?"

Severus looked at the box too and smirked, "While the idea, to reminding Granger why I was the most feared Death Eater once, is tempting, but no. I have changed."

Minerva transformed two empty cauldrons into armchairs and conjured some tea and biscuit too.

"Let's sit down, and talk, all right?"

"Is this the part, where you are going to ask a lot of question, and I will feel uncomfortable?" he murmured. Severus put a charm on his potion and accepted the tea what Minerva made. It was chamomile with berries; after the first slip, he felt a little bit better.

"Now tell me, will you press charges against her?"

"No."

"Why Severus? She kidnapped and drugged you! You cannot let her get away with this!"

"She is still Harry's friend."

"As I recall Harry has said 'get the f- ahem... get out of my life'. Maybe they won't lock her up at Azkaban but she needs medical care, and until somebody won't report her, she will continue doing this rampage."

During the war, the Trio saw too many death, blood, cruelty, and the suffered too much. Once they were captured and tortured, according to Harry, Hermione behaviour started to change after that. But they were on the run and didn't have time to think about what happened or how to cope with it. Hermione and Ron got together, and it helped, and they were there for Harry, and the Trio healed themselves. After the final battle, only Harry had health and magical check-up. He almost died in the fight, and the Healers kept him in the St. Mungo for a whole week. Nobody was allowed to visit him, and he got no news about what was going on the Wizarding World, and it was the best for him because the people went crazy. The wildest theories appeared in the Daily Prophet about Harry's magical abilities, ancestors and everything else. The people looked at them -not just Harry, but Hermione and Ron too- as they were Gods or something. While Harry and Ron blushingly accepted every compliment and tried to sneak out every Ministry event as soon as possible, until Hermione loved the whole hype. She enjoyed being in the centre, talking about what she has read and loved that finally, people started to realise how smart she was. That was the time when she turned into this maniac who thought that she needed to solve everybody's problem and everyone wanted her advises.

Severus took the biscuit from the table and leaned back in the comfortable armchair.

"If I report this to the Aurors," he said, "I have to tell them what happened, which is going to be embarrassing and I don't want to share any details with any strangers. But the main reason is that it will end up in the Daily Prophet, and people will be interested in why Granger thought that I would be the best Christmas gift for Harry. Only a few people know his sexual preference, and I don't want to him coming out just because of the pressure of the press."

"Oh, I see. Well, it's understandable. But why are you hiding? Are you afraid that Miss Granger would try something again?"

"No," said Severus quietly and as he turned away his cheeks became pink, "I'm afraid to face Harry."

"Why?" asked Minerva; then she made an annoyed face. In the last few days, she felt like a parrot who repeated the same question all the time. Why? Why did Granger what she did? Why was Weasley so supportive toward to Severus? Did he know something? Why did Harry think this is the end? Why was Severus hiding? Why? Why? Why?

She put down her teacup and leaned forward, "What we witnessed four days ago is the proof that Harry cares about you, that he has feelings for you too."

"Yes, and this is what scares me."

"I hate that I have to ask this again, but why?" Minerva groaned, if she ever has to say 'why' again, she will hex somebody.

"Minerva, the only thing I'm good at in relationships is how to screw them up, and I don't want to lose him. Having Harry in my life as, well let's say, as a friend it's better than nothing. I never thought, but the fact that I might have a chance with him is much more terrifying than hear his rejection."

Minerva smiled at Severus; sometimes she really wanted to pull the younger man into a bone-crushing hug and patted his head. But She knew that the only reaction what she would have from his friend was a nasty hex.

"Just because you had messed up one friendship, when you were young, doesn't mean you will mess up this too. Should I remind you that we are friends for Merlin knows how many years now, and I'm still by your side," Minerva pointed out "Harry is not his parents, and you are no longer that teenager, Severus. I know this whole thing scares you, but now you have to be the one who makes the first step. I'm sure Harry is also confused and scared, and if you keep hiding, he will think that you're angry at him. Just go and talk to him."

Minerva stood up, vanished the tea and the rest of the biscuit and transformed her armchair back to the cauldron. In the door, she turned back.

"If I found you here at dinner time, I'll drag you to Harry by myself!"

Severus sink more into his armchair. He hated when Minerva was right, and it was so annoying that the old witch was always right if it was about emotions. Severus knew since he left Harry's house that he should be the one who made the first move, but he didn't know how. That was the other reason why Severus went to meet with Minerva four days ago, but he didn't think that their meeting would end up eavesdropping Harry and his friends. After that, he was more lost how to talk to Harry.

He walked back to his potions, it looked ready, but it needed to be tested. He bottled the potions and sent a letter to his vampire friend, Draven to ask for his assistance. He cast Tempus; there were 3 hours left until dinner. He had three more hours to brew and pull himself together.

After brewing an extra dose of Pepper-Up potions for Poppy (what was completely unnecessary), he said goodbye to Minky and apparated in front of Harry's house. He lived in a two-storey building in a muggle part of London. The house was similar to the Grimmauld place, but it didn't look like a haunted place.

'You can do this!' Severus encouraged himself. 'You will just talk, it's not like saving the World.' Severus snorted. Talking! He would rather duel with Harry than talk. Oh, how he loved to duel with Harry when they were training. He was so good at it, and that bright smile what appeared on his face when he managed to hit Severus with a hex!

Severus shook his head. There was no time for dreaming. He took a deep breath, walked to the door and knocked.

A few moments later Harry opened the door. The surprise in his eyes immediately changed into worry.

"Severus? Did she -"

"No! I'm here by my own free will."

"Thank Merlin! I was afraid she did something again."

Harry leaned against the door, and his worried look changed into something else. His eyes softened and sparkle like the fairy light in Hogsmeade's street. He gave Severus his bright smile what always made the older man knees weak.

"Can I come in?" asked Severus and scanned the hall. Harry was wearing jeans and a green T-shirt, he looked like he was about to leave or he just arrived home. Maybe he was waiting for someone, or he wasn't alone? "If you are not busy," Severus added.

"Yes... Yes, of course. Sorry."

Harry stepped aside and let Severus into the house who, of course, checked how many shoes and coats were in the hall, but luckily he saw only Harry's stuff. Harry quietly closed the door and walked to Severus. They stood silently in front of each other. Harry turned his head in the direction of the kitchen then looked back at Severus with a questioning look. Severus started to panic that Harry wasn't alone, otherwise, why would he check the kitchen?

"I have to tell you something..." said Severus quietly. He won't chicken out right now; he will tell Harry that he wasn't angry and he would leave the man alone with whoever was waiting for him in the kitchen. "I was at the Three Broomsticks with Minerva a few days ago."

Harry looked at him with open mouth, and all Severus could think was how adorable he looked right now.

"You were so furious; you didn't notice us when you passed next to our table and, I... I heard everything that you said to Ganger."

"No way! I used Muffliato charm in the room!"

Severus smiled at Harry. "You forget that I invented that spell, Harry. I know how it works, and how to modify."

Harry blushed and turned his head in the kitchen direction again "You heard everything, didn't you?" he asked quietly.

"Yes, and I apologise for eavesdropping on you, I didn't mean to. Actually, it was Minerva who started, but it's not important. When I saw who you were with I couldn't help myself, I needed to know that you all right. You were so upset."

While Severus was talking, Harry was looking between him and the kitchen and Severs felt the panic was rising in his chest. What if Granger was sitting in the kitchen?

"Harry, I'm here because I'd like to tell you that I'm not angry -"

"Severus," interrupted Harry "Can you excuse me for a minute? I'll be back, I just need a moment, okay? Don't go anywhere!"

Harry ran into the kitchen, and the paranoid mode in Severus switch on. He was sure Granger was in the kitchen! They made this wicked and humiliating plan together, and now they are going to all laughing at him because he thought Harry cared about him! Severus listened, but he didn't hear any chatter from the room; instead, there were some noises what was similar than a door opening-closing sound. Was it an oven door?

Severus walked into the kitchen, and it was indeed the oven door. Harry has just taken out the pan from there. Severus took a deep breath; the room was filled with amazing smell what promised a delicious dinner, and his heart started to ache when he acknowledged that Harry was waiting for someone.

"Oh... I should have known," he murmured "You have guests for dinner, haven't you? I think it's better if I go and let you finish the preparations."

Harry closed the oven's door and put the oven pan on the stove.

"What? No. It's for me. Nobody will come. You know, cooking. Make me relax and help me think."

Severus leaned against the door frame and smiled at Harry, who smiled back. Moments passed in silence, they were looking into each other eyes; the whole scene was perfect. Until Harry thought he would take off the cover from the pan, but he didn't want to break the eye contact, so he reached to the back still smiling at Severus and gripped the handle.

"No!" Severus shouted but it was too late, Harry has already touched the hot pot, but in the next moment he cried out in pain. Severus was immediately on his side, grabbed Harry's hand and put under the cold water. Harry's skin turned red and blistered in no time.

"Shit! Shit! It hurts."

"Of course it hurts, you idiot! Keep your hand in the water!"

"But it hurts!" complained Harry and lay on the kitchen counter. He closed his eyes and tried to keep his hand under the cold water. Severus conjured a bowl from the table, he cut down a piece of Harry's aloe vera, what was in the window and Accioed several other ingredients. He started to crush and mix everything together in the bowl.

"Potter, you are not going to faint, are you?"

"Huh? Maybe? Everything feels strange. Why I've got pins and needles in my legs?"

"Because there are millions of nerves in your body." Severus gently pulled Harry up "Try to stand, okay? Breath steadily, and keep your hand in the water."

Harry leaned on Severus and rested his head on his shoulder. He took deep breathes to calm himself and kept his hand under the cold water, but Severus saw Harry was at the edge of fainting. After a few minutes, Severus finished the potion and looked down. He gently stroked his hair and almost placed a kiss on his forehead, but at the last minute, he stopped. He turned off the tap.

"Harry," he whispered and caressed his cheek, "You need to place your hand on the counter, the potion will help you."

Harry murmured something but did what was told. He opened his eyes and looked down to the bowl. There was a light blue, jelly-like material what had a strange smell.

"Huh? You made a potion in 10 minutes in my kitchen? How?"

Severus leaned closer and whispered into Harry's ear, "Let me tell you a secret, Mister Potter. I'm a Potions Master!"

Harry gasped dramatically. "Really? I would have never thought!"

Severus laughed lightly. He began to apply the potion to Harry's hand. No matter how careful Severus was Harry hissed so many times, but as soon as the potion started to work, he looked much better. While Severus was working, he used every opportunity to touched Harry, so when the younger one hissed Severus softly caressed his arm.

"Didn't Molly tell you that what you take out of the oven is usually hot?" he teased.

"Ha-ha, very funny! She told me."

"Then, pray to tell me, why did you decide to take off the cover with your bare hand? You're a great wizard Potter, but you aren't fireproof!"

"Believe me, I know that, but sometimes when I'm with you, I can't think straight," said Harry and blow down his head, his face flushed.

"It's because you're not straight."

Harry jerked up his head and laughed, "Ten points to Slytherin for the word-joke."

"How generous, Mr Potter!" purred Severus and held Harry's hand a bit more tightly, but Harry hissed since his hand was still aching. Severus apologetically looked at him and continued to apply the potion. After a few minutes, Harry's right palm was wrapped in a bandage and resting in a shoulder sling.

"I suggest to rest your arm and keep the potion on it for overnight. It should be fine in the morning but if not, see a healer."

"Thank you. Would you stay? I mean would you like to stay? For dinner, I mean." Harry sighed "As a thank you, can I invite you to dinner?"

Severus felt the excitement rushed through over his body. A dinner. Dinner with Harry, something that he has been dreaming of. They would be alone; nobody would bother them; it was better than going to a restaurant. He needed all his self-control not to grin.

"Yes, I'd like to," he said with a little shaky voice. "What did you cook?"

Both of the men look at the pan. Severus didn't see Harry's face, but he knew the younger one blushed; his neck and ears turned red.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?"

Harry turned back, his face was still a little pink, "Well I just put together what I found at home. "

"So it's like an experiment?"

"Yes, we can call like that," Harry smiled, "But I don't know how is it. So if it tastes terrible, we could order something."

"Well, I'm sure it will taste better than my experiments. Is it ready?"

"Not yet, I wanted to grill the cheese on the top."

There was grated cheese on the counter. Harry reflexively tried to grab the dishtowel with his right hand, and it surprised him that he can't. He sighed and took out his wand of his pocket with left-hand, but he held it so unsure; not really knowing how to cast a spell with that hand. Severus placed his hand on Harry's.

"Let me do this, alright?"

Harry nodded. Severus removed the top with a dishtowel, paying extra attention not to burn himself. As soon as he lifted the lid, the fantastic smell filled his nose and he sniffed in the air. In the oven pan, the food looked like art. Potatoes in rows making little squares and in each square, there was a meatball, and the whole thing was poured down with something creamy sauce. Severus didn't expect this. He put the cheese on the top and put the oven pan back to the oven. When he turned around, he saw that Harry was trying to take out the plates from the cupboard, but he wasn't really good doing things with left-hand, and he almost dropped them. Severus was immediately on his side and helped him. Harry blushed and murmured something that sounds like 'Usually I'm not that pathetic', but Severus decided not to hear it. After that Harry opened another cupboard and realised that he couldn't take out the wine glasses, he gave up and just told Severus where he found the other things in the kitchen. By the time they set the table the food was ready. Severus took out the pan, and they sat at the table.

Harry silently watched how Severus served the food on his own plate. He helplessly looked from Severus to his plate and down at his hand. He realised he has to eat with his left hand, but before he had a chance to touch his fork another cutlery appeared in front of his eyes. Severus was offering him a bite from their dinner. Harry blushingly accepted the offer. He didn't really know how was the food's taste, all he could think was that the whole situation was a big déjà-vu, except it was him who couldn't eat. He couldn't help, memories of the past few days were coming back. Severus tied up, kneeling in his hall, naked, the most awkward dinner what he ever had, the panic and the fear that he betrayed Severus trust and the quarrel with Hermione. The fight... Severus mentioned earlier that he heard them, but Harry wondered what exactly Severus heard. Did he hear everything? Did he understand Harry's word how Harry meant them? Did he know how Harry feel?

"Severus... What you had heard-"

But Severus didn't let him finished; he held up his finger to Harry's mouth.

"Not tonight," he said quietly, "Can we just enjoy this dinner, and talk about feelings at next time?"

"There will be next time?"

"I certainly hope so."

They smiled and lost again in each other eyes, then Severus cut a piece of meat for himself and taste Harry's cooking.

"Hmm...", He almost moaned loudly, "Harry, this is delicious and certainly tastes better than my last experiment."

"I'm glad you like it," Harry laughed and took a sip of his wine, "So what's your last experiment? Is it about the childhood disease? I'm sorry I forget the name."

"No, it's not that. I haven't made any new progress yet on that project. I had an idea how to decrease the vampire's bloodlust, and I've just brewed my first try."

"Decrease the bloodlust? Sounds interesting. Tell me about it."

And then again Severus found himself talking about his research, potions and answering Harry's endless question flow. The topics changed easily, from potions to foods, books, and movies, and the atmosphere was light and pleasant. After the dinner, Harry said that he has dessert too, and although Severus was already full, he didn't want the evening end, so he said yes for the dessert. They shared Harry's one slice of chocolate cake.

To how and when they started to hold hands during the meal they didn't know, but they just did. Playing and caressing the other's fingers.

Severus was sure he could talk with Harry until the sunrise, but chimes infiltrated through the window and reminded Severus that he should go home. He thanked the dinner, and they walked to the door hand in hand. Letting go Harry's hand was harder than he thought. Severus opened the door and stepped out of the street. It was snowing, not too hard, but he could see the snowflakes in the streetlights. He was ready to walk home, but he couldn't make the first step. He was anxious to make one more step forward, it just felt like a mistake. They haven't talk yet. It was Severus who said that they would speak at the next time, but what if there won't be? What if he walked away now, he would walk away from his only chance? He suddenly turned around. Harry was standing at the door with an unexplainable look on his face. Hesitant, thinking, shy.

"Harry, I -"

But this time it was Harry who held up his finger. "Not tonight," he whispered. He stepped closer and looked into Severus' eyes. "Not tonight," he said again, and with his free hand he reached out to Severus' and gently squeezed it, and then his hand wandered on Severus's arm and stopped on his heart.

"Can you just give me a goodbye kiss and elegantly walk away? And please, please don't look back so I can giggle like an idiot teenager girl."

There were times when Severus was thankful for his Occlumency skills and poker face, but this wasn't that one. At that moment he let all his emotions appeared on his face and in his eyes. He knew he blushed because he felt the heat on his skin. He smiled because he didn't want to hide anymore how happy he was because Harry wanted a goodbye kiss. And he just hoped that Harry saw all his feeling in his eye what he knew he couldn't put into words.

He placed his hand on Harry's, what was still resting on his heart, and then slowly moved up to Harry's face. He caressed the soft skin and smiled even wilder when Harry leaned into his touch and sighed happily. With his other hand Severus pulled Harry closer until their noses were touching, he didn't break the eye contact. He leaned forward slowly, only take a millimetre closer at one time. He wanted to remember this moment forever. Harry was looking into his eyes; his emerald eyes were shining as Severus has never seen before. He smelled like a fresh spring night after the rain mixed with chocolate and wine. The distance was invisible to the naked eyes between their lips, but their skin didn't touch yet. Severus felt Harry's breath and the heat what was coming from his skin. Under his hand he could feel Harry's heartbeat in his neck; It was beating crazy. He knew that his own heart was beating like that too. When Severus was sure, he stored all the important details about this important moment he closed the micro distant. Lips on lips. Skin to skin. Fireworks exploded in his heart, and suddenly the world became a brighter place.

But it wasn't enough, they wanted more, just a little more. So, when both of them opened their mouth at the same time, none of them was surprised.

If Severus were a drug addict, Harry's taste would be the perfectly mixed heroin for him, and he knew he could easily get attached to it. A minute ago Harry looked timid, but his kiss was anything but not shy. His tongue chased Severus' and demanded more and more attention. When Severus pulled a little away just to catch his breath, Harry reached after him and nipped his lower lips. Severus didn't care that his lungs were screaming for another dose of oxygen and started another sweet attack against Harry. It's a shame that the human body works with oxygen, so, unfortunately, Severus needed to stop and pull away. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath; he heard Harry's chuckle.

"You are giggling," he pointed out.

"Oh I'm sorry," Harry tried to control his face but it seemed impossible, "I should have wait until you turn around the corner."

Severus didn't reply just leaned closer again and caught those sinful lips again. This time he didn't hesitate, he didn't wait for an invitation, his tongue slipped between Harry's lips and the next moment their tongue was in an erotic dance again. Even the feeling was incredible Severus felt, he wanted more, just a little more. One of his hand was still resting on Harry's waist, so he pulled the man closer, but Harry's injured arm was trapped between their bodies, and as much as Harry tried to ignore the pain when Severus crushed their bodies together, he groaned and pulled away a bit.

"I'm sorry," Severus whispered.

"Don't be; I like your strong arms."

Severus chased away the pictures of what he could do with his so-called strong arms. He buried his face in Harry's neck and placed a few little kisses there.

"Are you free on Friday?" Severus whispered.

"Yes."

"Can I take you out for dinner?"

Harry stepped back just to be able to look at Severus' face; he tilted his head.

"Is it…. Is it a date?" he asked timidly.

"Would you like to be a date?"

"Yes," Harry breathed.

"Then," Severus leaned closer again and placed a kiss on Harry's cheek, "It is," he placed another on his nose, "A date," and he kissed his mouth softly.

That innocent soft kiss immediately turned into a heated one. Harry grabbed Severus' robe and pulled the man closer but he lost his balance, and they fell to the doorframe. Harry groaned in the kiss but didn't want to stop. Severus took over the control of the kiss and slowed it down. When they parted both of them were panting heavily.

"I should go before I cause more damage to you. See you on Friday, right?"

"Can't wait."

Severus clenched his fist; he needed to be patient and calm, he couldn't lose his head now. One more deep breath to remember Harry's fragrance and one more soft kiss to kept him warm while he walked home.

He kissed Harry one last time, "Good night, Harry."

"Good night, Severus."

Severus turned around with swirling robe and started to walk away. His pace was steady, his back was straight, and he really walked elegantly just how Harry asked him. There were a few cars on the street and Christmas music was coming from one of the house, but he heard perfectly clear how Harry was giggling at his doorstep. When he turned around the corner, he stepped into a dark doorway and leaned against the stone wall. With a shaky hand, Severus touched his lips. He kissed Harry, and he asked him out. In his dark hiding place, he let himself giggling for a little.

Friday couldn't come fast enough.

Chapter Text

The next evening Severus floo called Harry, just to make sure his hand healed properly, and it was a good excuse to talk to him. Harry reassured Severus that his hand was healed and even a Healer saw it, of course, Severus knew that, after all, he made the potion, he knew it would work. The quick checkup easily turned into a two hours talking, and if the clock, on the wall, didn't announce loudly that it was late, they would have talked until dawn.

After that day, Severus didn't find a good excuse to talk to Harry, but he didn't even have too much time either. Because of his hiding in Hogwarts, he had a lot of orders, and the brewing kept him busy until Friday. In the morning, when Severus checked his calendar what orders he had to make, he was surprised to see that it was already Friday. At noon he realised he hadn't told Harry where and when they would meet, he sent an apologetically letter with the restaurant's name and the time.

Severus arrived five minutes before seven. He was surprised to see Harry was already in front of the restaurant. Harry was wearing black trousers with a dark brown coat, and his Gryffindor scarf was wrapped around his neck. His hands were in his pocket, and he was watching two suspicious strangers on the other side of the street. Severus smiled when he saw him and speed up, but after a few steps, he almost stopped. He slowed down his pace and started to think: How do you greet somebody who you kissed once? What should he say? Good evening? No, sound too formal. Hi? No, sound childish. Or Hello? Should they do something else? Handshake? Absolutely not! Hug? Kiss? Kiss on the cheek, on the mouth? Is it too much?

While he was thinking, his leg carried him to Harry, who already notice Severus and timidly waved to him. Harry was smiling, like always, his nose and ears were red. Severus rejected the idea of any physical contact and decided to go with a simple greeting. He looked into Harry's green eyes, and he forgot what greetings he had chosen. Was it the Hi or the Hello? It was surprising to him that because of a pair of green eyes his brain stopped function properly.

"Harry," he breathed out quietly in the end. It seemed Harry was also having trouble what to say. Now his cheek joined his red body parts. Before the situation got more awkward, a waiter opened the door, "Good evening Sirs, would you like to come in?"

Severus sighed in relief; he was glad the waiter saved the situation, "Yes, thank you. We have a reservation." he said.

"Great! Hurry up; it's warm and cosy inside."

They stepped inside, and indeed, the temperature was much better there.

"Can I have your name, sir?"

"Snape."

"All right, let me see..."

While the waiter was looking the list Severus took off his coat, and he saw Harry was doing the same, but one of his hands stuck in the sleeve and he was struggling to take it out. Severus stepped behind him and helped him out, make the younger man blush again.

"Here it's, " said the waiter, "Snape, table for two at 7 o'clock. Follow me, please."

Severus smiled at Harry, gently touched his back and gestured to him to follow the waiter. He was resting his hand on Harry's back, while they walked to their table because Severus wanted to make sure Harry was alright because he was awfully quiet.

They sat down, and the waiter went to fetch the menus for them. Harry looked around. They were in the muggle part of London. The restaurant was in a not too popular, quiet area; that's why it wasn't full. It was elegant, but not that luxurious type. The brick walls and the real fireplace gave a cosy feeling for the guests, and soft music was coming from the hidden speakers. There was a single tea candle on their table, and Harry noticed that several others were hanging around in the room. Harry found the restaurant really romantic.

The waiter came back with the menus. Severus watched how Harry took the menu with shaking hands.

"Are you cold?" he asked when they were alone again. For Harry's questioning look he added, "Your nose is still red, and your hand is shaking."

Harry shook his head and smiled wanly, "I'm fine," he said, but his voice was unsure. Severus knew that tone; it was what Harry uses when he doesn't want to talk about something. Avoiding more question Harry picked up the wine card, but Severus was sure he didn't read a single word. Minutes passed in complete silence, and when the waiter came back to take their drink orders, Harry looked at him like he didn't understand what he wants. Severus asked for more time; the waiter smiled at him understandingly.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

Harry was already hiding behind the wine card again desperately tried to find something to order. Severus took the card out of his hand.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, everything is fine."

Severus gave the 'Don't lie to me, Potter!' look, and Harry turned his head. He watched the other happily eating, chatting and laughing couples. He felt Severus' eyes on him, so he turned back and took a deep breath, but when he breathed out, he blew away the candle on the table. This little action didn't help him to feel more comfortable.

"I'm nervous," he said quietly and looked down at the table.

"Why? We are eating dinner, something that we have done before, except now both of us can use our own cutlery. Unless…," Severus stopped for a minute. The silent made Harry lift his head up again and look straight into a pair of dark eyes; Severus was smirking, "Unless, you want me to feed you."

Severus never flirted before, and he always imagined it would be fun, otherwise, why would people do that, but he just made Harry more red and uncomfortable.

"Honestly Harry, what's bothering you?"

"You said that we would talk at the next time, and this is the next time, and I thought…"

"Thought you what? That I'll show up with two feet long parchment filled with questions and demand you to answer all of them and then I want you to pour your heart and soul out for me?"

"Well, I didn't expect the parchment; I know you can memorise a lot," Harry mumbled.

"He didn't expect a parchment, he says!" Severus shook his head, he reached across the table and took Harry's hand. "The last thing I want is to make you feel uncomfortable and force you to talk about something that you aren't ready. I'd like nothing else just you and me spend a nice, quiet evening together with eating and talking about topics that don't make you uncomfortable. I'd like to know you better, but I don't expect you to tell your deepest secret at our first date."

"I thought you already know me."

"I learnt things about you as your ex-Professor and mentor. I know for example that you are hopeless in Potions but great in Charm and fighting, but I don't know everyday things about you. Like, I don't know, your favourite books or what you do in your free time."

Harry looked away again. Across the room, there were two men holding hands just like they, but those two were entirely lost in their own little world. If Harry wanted to be honest, he envied them; they were already beyond the embarrassing situations, the awkward silents and the over-thinking part. He didn't notice, but he started to caress Severus' hand and to play with his fingers. He was still avoiding Severus' gaze when he spoke again; his voice was bit shaky.

"I waited for this so long. After you asked me out, I couldn't stop thinking about what will happen today. I was thinking about what will you ask and what I'm going to answer. I was making up conversations and playing it over and over again in my head to make myself (and Ron too) crazy; I started to worry about things I didn't even know. But what worried me the most was that I show up here and I mess up everything. The thought that I could destroy everything made me physically sick. I don't want to mess this up. I don't want to lose you before I even have a chance to get you. I don't want to lose you at all." Harry was whispering the last sentence. Severus squeezed his hand, make him finally look in his eyes.

"I can believe I say this, but how about you stop thinking? Just be yourself."

Harry laughed a little and nodded. Severus locked their fingers together, and now they were holding hands on the table just like that couple on the other side of the restaurant. He moved his other hand above the candle, lit it up again, and then opened the menu.

"So, this is one of my favourite places. I have been here a few times with Minerva and Poppy. The chefs are Italians; all the pasta are home-made. Last time I ate carbonara it was delicious, Poppy had a lasagne it was also great, and if I remember correctly Minerva had... What?"

Harry was staring at Severus with open mouth.

"You-You lit up the candle with just a wave of your hand. Without any words or a wand."

Severus never thought somebody would be that amazed just because he did a little wandless magic. He felt his face started to burn.

"Err... Yes, I can do a few things without a wand."

"Wow! It's impressive. Who taught you? Or did you learn it by yourself? Are there any books about it? Is it hard to learn? Do you think I can learn too? Can you teach..."

"Harry!" Severus interrupt the question flow, "I'm hungry. Can we order first and then I promise I'll answer all your question."

In the same moment, the waiter showed out of the nowhere to asked them if they were ready to order. Harry chose the carbonara and Severus decided to eat the lasagne, they also order the bottle of Rosé wine and were still holding each other hands until the food had arrived. Severus, as he had promised, answered all of Harry's question. Harry wanted to try to do wandless magic immediately, but Severus didn't let him. As easy as it shows, it could be very dangerous too. As the first try usually two things could happen; either nothing or you blow up something. But Harry was so eager to learn, and he wanted to learn from Severus, so they agreed that when they have more free time, Severus will teach Harry.

Dessert followed the main course, and the wandless magic topic changed to free times. At the end of the dinner, Severus had learnt that Harry likes watching action movies, reading comics and taking long walks. After the delicious meal, Harry asked if Severus would like to walk around a bit in the town and he said yes without hesitation.

They wandered around in the city, but they paid attention to stay in the Muggle part. They found a little Christmas market what was open despite the late time and when Severus smelled the mulled wine in the air, he grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him toward the market. He was happy when he noticed that Harry didn't want to let go of his hand. So Severus' wish, to holding Harry's hand and walking in a snow covered market, came true.

No matter how slowly they were walking eventually, they reached Harry's home. Harry stepped on the second step and pulled Severus on the first one. He knew they were in the protection of his house so nobody would see them. Severus hugged Harry and sighed when Harry buried his head in his neck.

"Tonight was amazing; I had a great time. Can we repeat again?" Harry whispered.

Severus moved his head to Harry's ear and placed a soft kissed there, "I'd love to," he said and started to give soft little kisses to Harry, moving slowly forward to his mouth. The kiss was bit hesitant, but welcome and tasted mulled wine and Tiramisu. When they parted Harry touched their nose together and rested his forehead on Severus'.

"What's your plan for the weekend?"

"I'm going to test the bloodlust potions," said Severus and kissed the edge of Harry's mouth.

"How do you usually test the potions?" Harry asked curiously as he also kissed the edge of Severus' mouth.

"Well, in that case, I'll give to a vampire and write down the effects."

Harry was about to kiss Severus' nose, but when he heard the answer, he pushed Severus away.

"Wait a minute! You are going to meet a hungry vampire and watch what effect your potion make on them?"

"Yes."

"Absolutely not!"

Severus chuckled; It seemed Harry wasn't only caring, but he was overprotecting too.

"You have nothing to worry about; I'll be sa-"

"I'm going with you!" Harry interrupted and gave the most suborn and adorable look to Severus, who had to smile.

"Harry..." Severus cupped Harry's face and put a small kiss on his nose, "Don't give me that look, please. Draven not particularly fond of the Aurors and he's starving himself for me."

Severus caressed Harry's cheek with his thumbs and placed another kiss on his nose, "I'll be fine."

Harry looked down, but Severus could see his face was flushed, "Can you floo call me when you arrive home?" he whispered. He sounded like a child who was afraid their mommy wouldn't pick up them from the kindergarten. Severus' hands were still on Harry's face, so it was easy to lift his head again and made Harry look at him. Severus kissed him slowly and tenderly.

"I will, but you don't need to worry. I can handle a hungry vampire."

Harry buried his face in Severus' neck again, took deep breaths, hoping that the smell of Severus' cologne would wash away his worries but it only made him hug Severus more tightly.

"I know," he said after a while, "You're brilliant in fighting, but I'm always worried about you."

For that statement, Severus kissed Harry so passionate that Harry moaned into the kiss and grabbed Severus coat and pulled the man one step up. No matter how much Severus would like to spend the rest of the night exploring Harry's mouth, hearing those sweet sound what he made, and let himself drag inside, Severus knew this time hadn't come yet. Severus slowed down the kiss and slowly pulled away. Both of them were panting; their breathing was visible in the night. Harry's face was red, and Severus wondered if it was because of their kiss or the cold, but when Harry's lips started to shake and turn into a purple shade, he knew the answer. After all, they have walked around in the cold winter night for almost two hours.

"You're cold, aren't you? You should have told me." Before Harry could have protested, Severus kissed him quickly. "Thank you for tonight; it was indeed amazing. Now go inside, you silly, before you catch a cold. I'll call you tomorrow."

With one last kiss, Severus let Harry go and walked to the end of the street where he turned left and hid at the dark doorway like last time and spent more than ten minutes to calm down his racing heart.

~*~

Severus had survived the weekend, but unfortunately, his invention didn't work. Draven was already sick because of the hunger, and the potion only made it worst. The poor vampire was lying on the ground in pain, cursing Severus and sworn that he would kill the man if he can walk again. But a few litre fresh blood cured and calmed down Draven, who said he would help Severus next time too.

Severus called Harry in the evening, and Harry demanded to know every little detail of the meeting. Severus had to tell five times that he was alright and Draven didn't mean the killing part seriously.

On Monday Harry showed up in Severus' shop with handmade sandwiches and asked if he wanted to eat lunch with him. Severus' also had his own lunch, but it was quickly forgotten in the fridge, and he gladly accepted Harry's offer. The uncertainty was in the air just like at the beginning of their date, but this time Harry saved the situation. It was Severus who suggested to Harry to be himself, but Severus also had the problem how to act. But Harry took the advice, and he was his usual self, energetic, chatty and smiling. They shared lunch talking about Severus' customers and what idiots Harry had to deal with as an Auror. Bringing food for Severus became Harry's habit, and he showed up in Severus' shop three or four times a week. Sometimes even Ron showed up to ask if Severus need anything or saw anything unnatural. It made him happy that Ronald was friendly with him; he knew the Weasley clan acceptance was important for Harry. Besides their lunch meetings, they spend a lots evening with dating, eating out, going to the cinema, theatre, or they just wandered around in the town. The awkward 'how to greet the other' situations slowly faded away and the touches and kisses came naturally.

They easily fit into this routine, and although they still avoid the emotions topic or talking about what's happening between them, they silently agreed on one thing. They wanted to make things slowly, get to know the other better and see how can they spend time together. They wanted to make sure they can build a relationship, (or maybe even life) and they wanted to build it on a solid foundation.

This routine after a while was so natural for them that one evening when they were sitting in a Chocolate house and drinking their special hot chocolate, Harry asked Severus what he would do on the weekend he was surprised when Severus informed him that was already Christmas.

Harry put down his hot chocolate and reached out to Severus' hand.

"Do you have plans? I'm sorry, I already promised to Molly that I'd be at the Burrow to help her with the cooking and I agree to stay there until New Year, but I can cancel it. I'm sure she will understand."

"It's not necessary; I won't be in the city. Minerva invited me to spend the holidays with her and Poppy at her weekend house in the countryside."

Harry moved closer to Severus and locked their fingers together. This also became one of their habits; they always held hands when they were talking.

"That's great. I wouldn't bear the thought that you spend the Christmas alone."

"You worry too much, Harry. I spent most of my Christmas alone; I can survive one more."

Harry leaned even closer and kissed Severus softly, "That because I wasn't a part of your life, but I am now, and I'll make sure you will only have wonderful holidays."

It always surprised Severus that sometimes Harry said the sweetest thing that Severus ever heard so easily. Severus was sure Harry didn't even know what effect made his words on him. He couldn't deny it that he loved the attention of what Harry was giving him. Harry always paid attention to what Severus said, and he remembered every little insignificant nothing: like Severus once mentioned that he never ate Indian food before; Harry did a research to find the best Indian restaurant in London and took Severus there, Or he baked muffins for Severus because he said he'd like to eat. Or he sent little messages to warn Severus if the weather was awful and remind him to take his scarf. There were hundred other things; Harry remembered all Severus' customers and their annoying habits, Severus' last research or what potions he made. For Severus, it was normal to remember things like that, because he was just like that and other people was always amazed that Severus could recall a lot of things. He thought that Harry was just like him, but Harry forgot meetings, and dates or what other people had said, and it melted Severus' hear when he realised that Harry only remembered things that were important for him. Ergo Severus was important to Harry.

After another soft kiss, Harry buried his head in Severus' neck; he liked to stay there. Sometimes they sat and talked like that. Severus one hand wrapped around Harry's waist, another locked together. He rested his head on Harry's whose head was resting on Severus' shoulder, nose buried in the neck. They could talk in that positions for hours, giving kisses on the neck or ear between words.

"Severus?" Harry murmured.

"Yes?"

"At Christmas people exchange gifts, but... I don't know what to buy for you. Is there anything you would like to get? I know if you tell me the magic of surprise is gone but I really don't have any idea."

Severus ran his hand through Harry's always messy hear, "You don't have to buy me anything."

"But I'd like."

"Harry, it’s really nice from you, but I don't want you to buy anything. Let's skip the gift exchanging this time, alright?"

Suddenly Harry lifted up his head and looked into Severus's eyes, the expression on his face was unreadable. Before Severus could ask what happened Harry leaned closer and kissed Severus. It wasn’t a soft kiss what they usually shared in public. Harry actually attack Severus’ mouth, slipped his tongue between Severus’ lips and demanded attention. Severus, who was terrible to resist when Harry was kissing him like that happily let his tongue chased around. When they parted both of them were panting.

"What was that for?" Severus whispered.

"It was your Christmas gift, but if you don't like you can give me back," replied Harry with an innocent smile and Severus thought that smile would be a death of him.

"Oh…I think I'll give it back. Not because I don’t like it, but I think you should keep it."

Severus flashed a wicked smile and pulled Harry back to same intensity kiss.

"But I insist you keep it," panted Harry when they broke apart for air.

"In that case, you should give it back, don’t you think?"

Harry smiled and leaned forward again. This kiss was a bit slower and less passionate, but Severus was afraid that if they didn’t stop this, they would reach the point where their behaviour would be unacceptable.

While they were playing this little ping-pong kissing game, two girls passed by their table and one of them was watching them and she was giggling.

"Becca! Becca! Look!" said the giggling-girl and started to hit her friend to pay attention.

"Jesus, Helen! It hurts! Stop hitting me!"

"But loooook!" She almost pointed at Severus and Harry, but the other girl, named Becca, grabbed her hand.

"Don't do that! It's rude to point at people," Becca sighed and looked at the direction where Harry and Severus were sitting, "Honestly Helen! Why do you have to do this, every time? You know what don't even start! Yes, I can see them. Two men sitting in a café, hugging, kissing and try to enjoy their date if a creepy girl, like you, wouldn't stare at them. Oh, and yes, they're cute. Did I miss something?"

It seemed like they had played this conversation many times before.

"They're super cute," Giggling-Helen was still staring Harry and Severus, who decided to act they didn't hear what was going on.

"Wish I had a date like that," said Helen dreamingly.

"I brought you here, didn't I? Stop staring! I want to eat hazelnut muffin. Let's go!

Giggling-Helen was still staring, and she needed a few moments to notice that her friend left, and a few more to understand what she had said.

"What? Becca! Becca, wait! Is it a date?" She ran after her friend who was already watching the cakes.

Harry chuckled and lifted up his head to look after the two girls.

"You heard that? She thinks we're cute," said Harry, now he was giggling too.

"I'm sure she meant that you are cute."

"I think you are cu-"

One finger landed on Harry's mouth, and he couldn't finish the sentence, "Don't you dare use that adjective on me. I'm not!"

Harry smiled and kissed Severus' finger, "Alright. If I'm the cute one, you are the...Hmm... Is sweet out of the game too?"

"Absolutely!" said Severus horrified.

Harry leaned back and pushed his glasses up on his nose while he was thinking. Severus turned his head to the direction of the counter. The two girl was looking at the cakes. Helen stopped giggling, and now she was talking about something intensively, and the other girl, Becca was just smilingly listening to her. Then Becca smoothed one lock of hair behind Helen's ear, and she stopped talking and just stared at Becca. Severus smiled at them and didn't notice that Harry was watching him.

"How about handsome?" asked Harry suddenly. Severus turned his head back with wide eyes, his face flushed.

"I-I don't think. I'm-"

It was Harry turned to silenced Severus with one finger, "Yes, you are," he said and kissed Severus, "You're handsome and adorable when you blush. "

~*~

On the second day of Christmas, a brown owl landed in front of Severus while he was drinking his usually second morning coffee in the living room. The owl was caring a little package and a letter too. Severus recognised Harry's handwriting and right away took the message from the animal.

Dear Severus,

I know we agreed on not to exchange gifts, so THIS IS NOT A CHRISTMAS GIFT! Ron bought me plastic bonbon forms for Christmas, and last night I can't control myself; I ended up making bonbons. At the box, you will find my first experiments. I've never done anything like this before. I hope the taste is tolerable.

We have a lot of snow here and the Burrow is full as always, but we have so much fun.

I hope you have a great time too with the Ladies. Tell them I say hello!

See you in January.

Harry

Severus opened the box; inside there were a cube and round shaped little bonbons. They weren't shiny or decorated and definitely looked like home-made sweets. He carefully took out a piece and examined it. The dark chocolate smell promised delicious taste. After the first bite, Severus was sure; the bonbon tasted perfect. It was smooth, rich chocolate cream, and Severus could taste a little whiskey in it.

"Hmm... Chocolates. Who sent chocolates for you, Severus?" asked Minerva.

"It was Harry; he said this is his new experiment. Would you like to try it? It's delicious."

Minerva and Poppy also took one-one pieces of the box and Severus also chose another one. It was the round one; It also had chocolate cream inside, but it was with nuts. The next moment the only noise was in the room the three people satisfying humming.

"He definitely has the talent for cooking. Well, I volunteer myself for trying any of his experiment for the future," said Poppy.

"Yes, me too," chuckled Minerva; Severus rolled his eyes. He closed the box, he wasn't a sweet-mouthed person, but he felt he could it the entire box in one sitting. He went to the table and wrote a reply.

Dear Harry,

Like everything, the sweets making also needs a lot of practice, and if you need somebody to try your experiment, these two chocolate-addicted old Ladies are volunteer themselves for being your tester. (And I also don't mind being your experimental 'rat' in the future.)

The bonbons are delicious. Thank you.

It's quiet here, luckily no annoying neighbours. I spend my days with reading (I'm prohibited to brew potions.)

See you soon.

Severus

Severus gave the letter to the owl and petted before let it go its way. He picked up the box again; there were 15 more pieces inside. He quickly counted that if he ate two pieces every day the box would last until he met with Harry, then he could ask him to make another. He put the box in his room and went back to the living-room reading his potions magazine and tried to avoid the two old ladies' twinkle eyes.

The first day of the New Year brought more snow to Scotland, but Minerva didn't mind at all. She was sitting in his cosy living-room near the window with her favourite book. The cracking fire made pleasant background music, and Minerva stopped reading time to time just to admire the view. Her house was located on the top of the hills, so she had a perfect view to watch how the snow cover the town and the lake. She was grateful that Poppy convinced her to keep the house what she had heritage from her uncle; they spent so many great Christmas and summer vacations here. A firm knock brought Minerva back from her thought. She frowned her eyebrows and wondered who would visit her on this day. She knew a few wizard families were living in the town too, but she didn't keep in touch with them. Poppy also gave him a questioning look, but she struggled her shoulder, maybe the neighbours would like to wish them Happy New Year. Minerva went to open the door expecting a local, holding a pie or something but she wouldn't have thought she would find a red-nosed, tired looking, smiling Harry Potter on her doorstep.

"Mr Potter, what a nice surprise!"

"Happy New Year, Professor McGonagall!" said Harry hoarsely but smilingly.

"Happy New Year to you too, but what happened to your voice?"

"I was celebrating the New Year at the Borrow, and after midnight Ron, I and a bottle of whiskey had a meaningful conversation about Molly's cooking skills, and we both agreed on that she is an excellent chef, mother, woman. The whiskey convinced us that we should thank her everything, so we decided that we would like to give her a serenade."

Harry stopped for a moment to clear his throat, "Let me tell you, Professor, drinking cold champagne outside in the snow, singing loudly at three in the morning is a bad idea. Never do that!"

"I doubt I'd ever had the desire to do something like this but thank you for the advice," Minerva laughed, "But why are you here? Do you need Poppy?"

"No, I think a few cups of tea with honey will cure my throat. But can I speak with Severus for a minute, please?"

"Of course. He's in the kitchen, making tea or secretly brewing potions, I don't know. Second door on the right side."

Minerva stepped aside and let Harry in, she walked back to the living-room and smirked at Poppy who gave her another questioning look. Five minutes later Harry walked back to the entrance, but before leaving the house, he stopped at the living-room and cheerfully waved to the two old women. "Happy New year to the Ladies!"

Minerva and Poppy looked at each other and chuckled. After a few minutes, Severus has arrived with their tea, he put down the tray on the table but didn't start serving the drinks. Severus sat down on the couch, his face was a bit red, his eyes were dreamy, and he was utterly lost in his own thought. It was Poppy who broke the silence, "Severus, what did Harry want?"

Severus tore his eyes away from the fire and looked at his friends. It seemed he forgot that he wasn't alone in the room.

"I'm not really sure," he said after a while, "He came here just to kiss me," and he touched his lips like he was searching for any evidence that the kiss really happened.

"Did you know," Poppy said smilingly, "they say what you do on the first day of the new year will be what you do on the most of the year?"

"...ooh..."

Severus's white cheeks turned pink and then red, he looked back to the fire in embarrassment and touched his lips again. He forgot his tea, his reading and the two women who hid their happy smile behind their teacup.

Chapter Text

The New Year didn't only bring the promise for more kiss to Severus but also brought scandal, sadness and first fight into their blossoming relationship. While Severus didn't report or tell anyone (except Minerva and Poppy) what happened just for avoiding the questions and protect Harry's private life, Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zambini weren't that charitable.

Blaise Zambini was sixteen years old when on a rainy, grey autumn day he realised he was in love with his classmate, Pansy Parkinson. But before he had found his courage to tell his feeling, a war was going on and pretending to be a good little Death eater puppy and try to survive was more important than love. After the war, Blaise thought he lost his only chance because Pansy's parents wanted an arranged marriage but, from Draco, he had learned that Pansy wanted to marry because of love. So Blaise started to secretly court Pansy in the traditional wizarding way because he knew for a pureblood family like the Parkinsons the traditions were important. He couldn't believe his luck when after a few letter exchange Pansy told him that she fancied Blaise for a while now. They started to meet, and everything was like in a fairy tale.

After six months of secret dating, Blaise decided to make an official introduction and ask Pansy's hand in marriage. He knew his show up has to be perfect otherwise Pansy's father would never agree to the wedding. Blaise contacted Draco for advice, and they met in a coffee where Blaise told all his fears, and Draco gave useful tips to his friend. If Severus had seen them, he would suggest using Muffialto, Protego and six different shield charms around their table, if they speak about private life problems in a public place, because someone has a bad habit to eavesdropping on people. But on their misfortune, they didn't know that, and that's how a certain brown haired girl heard everything and immediately decided to help out her ex-classmate.

The Parkinson parents had a party in January where Blaise was also invited. He showed up wearing his best outfit and looked more handsome as ever. He waited for the best moment to talk with Pansy's father. When the time has come, he walked to the man and introduced himself. He started to talk about how much he loves Pansy, how he adores her skills in Transfiguration and so on. The women's heart around them melted from the way Blaise was talking about the young lady. Everything was perfect until the certain point when Blaise asked permission to marry Pansy, and he started to talk about how much he wanted to make a family with her. Which was fine but he went into details about baby-making, and it seemed he didn't notice what he was talking about. Pansy and Draco warned him, but Blaise was just talking and talking. When Blaise climbed up on a table to sing a song about Pansy's perfect body, Draco hexed him into conscious to stop him, but it was too late. Pansy's parents and the guest were furious.

When Blaise woke up, he didn't remember anything. Draco called the Aurors and a medi-witch because he was sure somebody had attacked his friend. The medi-witch found a rare and difficult potion in his system; Tell-what-your-heart-desires-the-most. Blaise admitted that on the way to Pansy's manor there was a moment when he stumbled on the street and the next moment he felt a strange taste in his mouth, but he thought it was just because of the nervousness. Looking through Blaise's memories, the medi-witch found out the somebody modified it. They called an Unspeakable, and with his help, they restored Blaise's memories. First, all they could see was a female hand covered Blaise's mouth, but after a few watching, somebody has noticed a woman's reflection on the show-window. She had pale skin, bushy brown hair and brown eyes.

Hermione was arrested on that evening; she didn't even deny what she did... All she cared about was if her plan had worked or not. After the questioning, Aurors realised that Hermione wasn't a criminal she was just sick. She believed what she did was right, and this is her job to help people to get together. Hermione was locked up in St. Mungo.

Blaise spent the rest of the night talking with Pansy's parents, apologising, begging and talking about his true feeling. Pansy's father said that her daughter's husband has to be a strong man and not somebody who can be easily drugged on the street by a woman. In the end, they let him courting Pansy but, Blaise had to prove that he was capable of protecting their daughter.

Harry and Ron were aware of Hermione's arrest and the whole thing the next morning. They went to their boss, and both of them distanced themselves from the investigation. Neither Harry nor Severus mentioned what happened, although Severus wanted to ask Harry how he feels, they were still avoiding the emotional topic.

And the scandal? Well, it was bigger than you thought! Of course, Rita Skeeter was also at the party, and the whole case was on the front page of the Daily Prophet. Severus was praying to every God, Saint, Power of the Universe that his name didn't appear in the newspaper. He was lucky, but Harry wasn't. It was enough to mention Harry Potter once, and everybody was talking about him again. And of course, the question was: Does Harry Potter have a love life?

On the street people stopped and watched him what he bought or which shop he went into. There were pictures of him doing his job, or shopping and of course the papers were full of with wild speculation.

Most of the time Severus and Harry managed to sneak off the prying eyes. They went to muggle restaurants or left the theatre earlier, but after a while, Harry got tired of this, and he refused to hide. He planned their next date in one of his favourite wizarding restaurants. The moment when they stepped into the building the people froze, like if the time had stopped. Everybody was watching them. The waiter greeted them politely, just like any other guest. That's why Harry loved this place; nobody had every treat him differently.

Severus was patient during the food choosing and the first course. He tried to pay as much attention as possible on Harry and very minimal on the rest of the restaurant, but it was hard when you know thirty people were watching you. During the main course they were talking about dinosaurs (they saw the Jurassic Park movie a day before) and if it was possible to bring them back to life. Severus was just about to share his opinion on how stupid they were in the movie when the waiter stepped to their table.

"Excuse me, Mr Potter. I know you don't like favouritism, but the manager asks if you would like to move to the private dining area?"

Harry put down his fork and smiled at the man, "It's really nice from the manager, but I'm fine here."

"But Sir..." the waiter didn't know how to finish his sentence.

"Mr Snape said the lamb is excellent tonight. Can you give our compliments to the chef?"

"Of course Sir. Sorry for the disturbing, enjoy your evening."

Severus had to control himself not to snore. Enjoy... The waiter went back to the kitchen and Harry smiled fondly at Severus.

"Where were we? Oh yes, the T-rexes. They look so funny with their tiny hands, don't you think?", And Harry was talking again like nothing happened. Yes, Severus thought the lamb was excellent. It was soft, friable and the seasoning was perfect, but it was getting harder to swallow it.

The waiter went back to the kitchen, and ten minutes later the manager came out. He looked around in the restaurant, and he sadly discovered the waiter was right. Nobody was eating, only Mr Potter and Mr Snape were enjoying their evening. Well, they were trying to. He also read the gossip in the Prophet. The Wizarding community desperately wanted to know with who was Potter dating. And maybe Snape and Potter were here on a date, but the manager didn't care about that. He knew that Potter was a returning guest, that's why he told this staff that Mr Potter is nothing more than a regular guest. He didn't want, and he wouldn't get any different treatments. His eyes met with the pianist; the man silently asked with his eyes what to do because nobody paid any attention to his play. He even hit the piano's keyboard with full palms, but besides two people there wasn't any reaction. The manager sighed and waved to the pianist to keep playing, and he decided that he would speak to the guests and asked them nicely to stop starring. Before he could make the first step something strange happened above Mr Potter's table.

At the table Severus gave up; he put down his cutlery and sighed, "I can't do this, Harry! Let's go home."

Harry looked up at him and shook his head, "I won't go home just because some people don't know the etiquette."

"Nobody is eating, just us..."

"...their loss, this food is only good when it's fresh and warm..."

"...and I'm sure that woman in the yellow dress is counting how many times you chew your meat..."

"...Did you know that we should chew it 30-35 times before swallow it? Who the hell counts this?"

"Harry! Please!"

Harry put down his fork and lowered his head, "You feel uncomfortable, don't you?"

"You have no idea...I feel like I'm choking. I can't eat like this."

"I know. Let me try one thing and if it doesn't work we go home, okay?"

Severus nodded hesitantly. Harry took his wand out of his pocket and laid on the table. He opened his mouth to say something, but the pianist hit the keyboard with full palms, and Severus winced. He turned to the pianist to give him a questioning look, but the man was making eye contact with another man.

"I want you to look at me exactly the way you looked when you found me in the corridor at my third year."

Severus remembered how ridiculous Harry looked like in his big pyjamas and how cheeky he was with him. He had to smile at the memory.

"I'm certainly sure you weren't smiling when the map was insulting you," Harry commented, and Severus change his facial expression. Harry nodded, "Much better." His expression also changed, he was serious, maybe a bit angry. Severus only saw this face once, the day when he defeated the Dark Lord. Harry waved with his wand a bit, and bright blue letters appeared above their table. Surprisingly, this made an effect on the people because some of them gasped.

LET ME CONFIRM YOU!

YES, YOU SEE IT WELL. IT'S ME, HARRY JAMES POTTER, THE BOY-WHO-LIVED, THE SAVIOUR OF THE WIZARDING WORLD. AND YES, THIS IS SEVERUS SNAPE, POTIONS MASTER, THE OTHER SAVIOUR OF THE WIZARDING WORLD.

Severus couldn't stop not to smirk. The bright letters faded away, and new ones appeared.

I WOULDN'T HAVE THOUGHT THAT IT WOULD BE THAT SHOCKING FOR YOU, BUT... YES, EVEN WAR HEROES NEED FOOD. THAT'S WHY WE ARE EATING.

In the corner of his eyes, Severus saw that some of the guests smiled. Were they actually so stupid, that they don't recognise the sarcasm? He really wanted to get up and hex them, but he also saw the mischief light in Harry's eyes.

BUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW IT'S ANNOYING, IMPOLITE, AND MAKE US UNCOMFORTABLE. EVEN A CHILD KNOWS THAT IT'S RUDE TO STARE. SO, I KINDLY ASK YOU, TURN YOUR ATTENTION BACK TO YOUR FOOD.

Harry put down his wand and started to eat again. Moments passed in silence but nothing had changed, the people were still staring them. Harry murmured something under his nose and picked up his wand again. He turned his head to the other guests. He let his magic run through the room make the windows shake, and the lights vibrate.

DO I HAVE TO REMIND YOU THAT IT WAS ME WHO DEFEATED VOLDEMORT? I WARN YOU ONE MORE TIME! PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR DISH OR I SWEAR I BLOW UP THIS DAMN...

The lights were vibrating as Harry's magic was lashing out in waves. Severus heard a voice of cracking windows.

"Harry! Calm down!" he warned him, "You will lose the control over your magic. Concentrate on my voice. Close your eyes and take a deep breath, think something calming."

Harry turned his head back and took a deep breath, the closest windows next to them cracked. He started to think about flying, cooking, Severus' cutting potion ingredients. His breathing slowly got back to normal. Finally, his little action made some effect on the people who were looking at them with frightened eyes, then they turned back to their food and not to surprisingly they all have found it cold. The manager laughed out loud and waved to the pianist to start playing something happy, he cast a spell, and everybody's food was warm again.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done this."

Severus lifted up his hand to take Harry's, but he stopped in the air. They only made physical contact when they were in the muggle world.

"Don't apologise. Sometimes it doesn't hurt to remind them, who you truly are."

Harry looked around in the restaurant, now everybody was eating, and nobody dared even lift up their head to their direction. He knew that their dinner date would end up in the Daily Prophet, but Harry came here almost 3 or 4 times a month with different friends, so it was nothing new.

"Do you want to go?" he asked Severus quietly.

"No. It looks like they have understood your message. Cheesecake for dessert?"

Harry smiled, and they continue their talking about the dinosaurs. Rest of their stay was enjoyable, and the atmosphere only froze when they stood up to leave. At the door, the manager stopped them and apologised and expressed hope that they will come again, but Severus assured him that a few impolite people couldn't keep them away from an excellent kitchen.

The little snow, what London had, melted after New Year and the weather forecast said a storm would clean the city. It was sure because the heavy rain clouds had already arrived and the sky was starless. Severus and Harry began to walk on the street, but at the next corner, Severus pulled Harry inside a dark alley. Before Harry could ask what was happening, he found himself in an alcove under the protection of a few spells.

"Shield? Why do we need protection? Are we in danger, Severus?"

But there was no answer, only two soft lips on his, and a passionate kiss. Severus pushed Harry to the wall and slipped one of his leg between Harry's thigh and began to loosen the scarf around his neck. When Harry's neck was free, Severus moved there and started a sweet attack on the soft skin. Taking slow their relationship meant playing safe. Licking, biting and sucking the other's neck wasn't a safe playing, but Severus had the urge to do this, and he didn't even really understand why. Harry, who had no idea what was happening and why just weakly gripped Severus' coat and tilted his head back.

The lightning lighted up the dark alley for a tiny moment, followed by thunder what swallow down Harry's loud moan. Another thunder shook the windows, and the rain started to pour down like somebody opened every tap in the clouds. Harry was gasping like there was no air in his lungs. It was like Severus sucked out all the oxygen and energy of his body with every kiss. Severus stopped kissing his neck, and Harry thought he had a minute to collect himself or catch his breath but the next moment Severus's sinful lips covered his mouth, and Harry really thought he was going to collapse. It was a torture. Sweet torture and Harry wanted it, even if he felt like he was about to die. Another lightning flashed, and thunder shook the city reminded them that this is not the time nor the place where they should do this. Severus leaned back a bit, and Harry was panting like he came up from the bottom of the Black Lake.

"We should go," Severus murmured in a deep lusted voice.

Yes, we should - Harry wanted to say, but he wasn't sure if he could even make one step. His legs were shaking; his fingers turned to white because he held Severus so hard and he was sure the whole alley was spinning. The wind has intensified too and slammed the cold rain to their faces, so Severus hugged Harry and apparated them in front of Harry's home. Harry hesitantly looked at Severus. Invite him inside or not? But Severus answered his unasked question; he kissed Harry one last time, "I'll call you," he said and gently pushed him toward the door. Harry turned back from the entrance to smiled at Severus and stepped inside. He closed the door, leaned against it and sink onto the floor. He had no doubt, one day Severus' passionate kisses will kill him.

~*~

Usually, people recognised how time flew when they started a new month in their calendar. For Severus, there were only two things what defined his days: what potions he has to brew and when will be his next date with Harry. But even for Severus, it was surprising to see that they had already started the second month of the year. Around Valentine's day, his shop always became busier. Half of the customers wanted Amortentia or Veritaserum; the other half wanted the antidote for these or Calming Draught. Harry also became busy because he had to deal with Severus' lawbreaker customers.

They didn't have time to meet for a date, and their lunch break meetings were limited too. Harry was overworked, and sometimes they called him in the middle of the night. After a few crazy days, Harry looked worse than after the Battle. He showed up in Severus shop unshaved with sandwiches, but he fell asleep in the middle of their lunch. Severus let him sleep for an hour. Before letting him go back to work he gave him a dose of energy potions. Usually, he didn't like using energy potions because it was like using drugs, but when Harry was tired he became unobservant, and he was an easy target, and giving him a potion was better than visit him in the hospital.

Severus felt so happy when the kitschy heart decoration disappeared from the shop windows, and his usual customers came back. He missed Harry so much; they haven't spent an evening together for two weeks. When the clock announced the 6 o'clock he closed his shop in record time, he took a quick shower and at 6:20 he left his home. He needed all he strength no to run on the street. He had a terrible day, and all he wanted was spending an evening with Harry, and complaining about idiot people and listening to him telling the same.

They were meeting on the Tower Bridge, Severus knew a muggle confectionery in the area, that has little boxes so they could hide and cuddle there. He arrived at the bridge in ten minutes and felt the excitement ran through his body. All he had to do is just cross the bridge, and on the other side, Harry was waiting for him. Severus began to walk really fast he was almost running. The bridge was full with tourist, but luckily none of them paid attention that another Londoner was running somewhere. Severus easily spotted out Harry in the crowd. He was leaning on the bridge railing, and he was watching the river. Severus speeded up his footsteps. Just a few more minutes, and he will hold Harry in his arm. At any minute, he would sense Severus' presence, and he would look up and smiled at him as he usually did. Severus got closer and closer to Harry, but he didn't move; he didn't even look up when Severus stopped next to him.

"Harry," said Severus and touched the younger man's shoulder, "Are you all right?"

Harry sighed deeply and shook his head. "I visited her today," he said quietly. It was needless to say the name; Severus knew to whom Harry was talking about. Severus moved his hand from Harry' shoulder to his back and tried to pull him up in a hug, but Harry was watching the Thames.

"I shouldn't have to go there, but after everything had happened, I still care about her. It's crazy, isn't it? But I wanted to make sure she's doing okay. I feel I owe her so much."

Harry sighed again, "After we rescued her from the troll I thought we would be friends forever and through the years I had no doubt. Did you know it was her who set fire on your robe during my first Quidditch match? We desperately believed that you wanted to kill me." Harry laughed bitterly, "Oh God! How young, reckless and stupid we were! How many crazy things we did together and I dragged them with me to my idiot adventures, and they came willingly. We stuck together, and we supported each other, and I thought it would last forever. She was my best friend."

Harry stopped for a moment. He turned his head to try to hide his face from Severus, but Severus leaned closer and saw Harry's mouth was shaking; he was fighting back his crying.

"When I walked into her room, she smiled at me, and for a second I thought everything was all right again… But-But I was wrong… You know what her first question for me was? 'Harry, have you fucked Snape yet?' I couldn't bring myself to answer or just say anything, I turned around and walked out of the room. There was a nameplate next to her door: Hermione Jane Granger. I looked at the name what I knew once; then I looked back at the door."

Harry's voice was trembling; it was harder to fight back the tears. Some of them already escaped from his beautiful eyes, and Severus thought his heart would break from the sight.

"Inside that room was a woman with the same name, but I don't know her anymore. I realised... At that moment I realised, I lost my best friend forever, and it hurts. It hurts damn much, Severus!"

In the end, Harry was sobbing, and even the noise of the tourists couldn't suppress his loud crying. Severus wrapped his hands around Harry and hugged him tightly.

"Why do I have to lose everyone?" Harry sobbed as he buried his head into Severus' coat. "What have I done that life hates me that much? Why does everyone leave me?"

"Shh... You know it's not true," Severus run his hand through Harry's messy black hair. This was the past of the comforting when people usually promised to the other everything what wouldn't come true. But Severus didn't want to say such sentimental fool things, so he remained quiet and held Harry tighter. After ten minutes of heart-breaking sobbing, Harry managed to calm down a bit. Severus still held him, gently stroked his hair and glared to everyone who dared to stare at them.

"Did you speak with the healers?"

"They said they would keep her there for a long time. I guess you don't mind it."

"Don't say that."

"Why? You hate her, or don't you?"

"I don't."

Harry let out a bitter laugh, "You don't have to lie to me just to make me feel better."

Severus tried to push Harry a bit away so he can look into his eyes, but Harry didn't want to corporate, he kept his face buried in Severus' coat. Severus sighed sadly, "I've never lied to you before; do you think I'll start now?"

Harry didn't answer so Severus continued, "I don't deny I was angry at her; moreover I was furious, and I also don't deny there was a time when the idea of painful revenge was tempting, but I had time to think. I was angry at her because I didn't understand her motives. After she drugged me, she didn't bring me to you immediately. I had ten minutes tied up, lying in the dark and thinking about why she was doing this. The variety of the reasons were endless, and the option that you might be interested in me wasn't even on the list."

Harry stepped back and turned to the river. His vision was blurred; all the night lights looked like an oil painting. He whipped away with his last tears with the end of his coat. Severus sighed deeply, how can he make it better for Harry?

"I should have cancelled this date. I'm a mess." Harry said quietly.

"It's okay."

"No, it's not! I'm sure you have a better program than listening to my whining."

Severus cupped Harry's face with both of his hand and lifted up his head. He placed a soft kiss on Harry's forehead.

"Harry, do you think I only want to be with you when everything is well and good? I want to be there for you in the hard times too."

But it seemed Harry didn't even heart what Severus said, he turned his head toward to the river again and took a step forward to the railing. Severus hugged him behind, caressed his hand and placed little kisses on his neck.

"Let's go, okay? The confectionary isn't far away, and I think what you need right now is a hot chocolate and an amount of cake what I normally wouldn't allow you to eat."

Harry didn't say anything, but he let himself guided. They didn't speak on the way to the confectionary. Severus wrapped his hand around Harry's waist and kept him close. In the confectionary, Severus asked Harry what he wants to eat, but Harry just struggled his shoulder, so Severus ordered two dark hot chocolates and two raspberry-chocolate mousse cakes.

Harry was still awfully quiet; he sat next to Severus with bowed head, and he was staring the table. Severus held his hand and gently caress it with his thumb. He wanted to say 'Everything will be all right.' But will it be? And what will be the all right in that case? If they keep Granger in the hospital for the rest of her life or if they release her after a while? There was no doubt that woman was insane, but can the mind-healers cure her? And if yes, will Harry and Granger's friendship be the same? Severus knew how important was Ron and Hermione in Harry's life. Ron was his first friend ever, Hermione was the second, and they were his best friends. They were the golden trio, and Severus couldn't recall a single moment when the three of them were separate. Could Harry forgive Hermione? And if yes will it affect Severus and Harry's relationship? Severus wondered if he could tolerate Granger's presence if she were a part of Harry's life again.

The waiter arrived with their orders, and Harry finally looked up. When their eyes met Severus saw nothing but brokenness, sadness and loss. He sadly smiled at Harry, hoped that the other would understand that he wasn't alone with his problem. Harry bowed his head down again and took a deep breath; he exhaled really slowly. Then he lifted up his head again, but all the emotion what was in his eyes before disappeared and only the emptiness remained there.

"How was your day?" he asked quietly.

Severus studied Harry for a few minutes. Was Harry really interested in his day or he tried to avoid the more talking about Granger? Was it all right to talk about Severus' day or should he force Harry to talk about his feelings?

"Boring," answered Severus and sipped into his hot chocolate, "But… I have a new contract with the St. Mungo."

"That's great," said Harry with a forced smile. Yes, it was great, and Severus was dying all week to tell about it to Harry, but now he didn't know if he should talk or not about this. "Tell me about."

Maybe talking about something else would help Harry to feel better, so Severus began to talking about the healers who got interested in his bloodlust potion and how they convinced the director of the Department of the Potions and Magical Medicines to support their work. How Draven offered his help too and how he convinced other vampires to take part in the research. In the beginning, Harry was only listening, but after a while, he started to ask questions and eating his cake. Severus hoped he helped on Harry' s mood, and there were moments when he thought he succeed, but as soon as they ate and drank everything Harry said he wanted to go home.

"I walk you home," Severus offered.

"I prefer the apparition this time."

Severus nodded, and they walked into an empty street. Severus hugged Harry at his shoulder and apparated them to the closest alley. They walked to Harry's home in totally silent. In front of the building, Harry stepped on the stairs, and Severus followed him, then Harry turned around in confusion. Severus held Harry's hand and didn't want to let it go because when Harry stepped on the stairs, Severus realised they haven't even kissed yet. Severus slowly pulled Harry closer and kissed him. There was a tiny moment when Harry was just standing there completely frozen then he kissed back. But it was strange. Severus couldn't find the right words; it just felt wrong. Like he was kissing somebody else. When they parted, he saw the emptiness in Harry's eyes again.

"Thanks for the cake, it was delicious."

"Harry…"

Harry pushed his lips on Severus' again; it wasn't a real kiss, just a quick touch to silence Severus.

"Good night, Severus," said Harry and he walked into his home.

Severus didn't know what to do. Something was terrible not right here, but should he go after Harry? He looked up to the building, at the second floor the light switched on, maybe that was Harry's bedroom. The light was on about 4-5 minutes, then the curtain moved a bit, and the window was black again. Severus looked around; there was nobody on the street, so he disapparated home.

The next morning, when Severus woke up, all his bones were hurting. He was sure he had nightmares, but he didn't remember any of it. Severus checked the clock on the wall; it was too early for opening the shop, so he made a large cup of black coffee for himself and sat in the living room. He was thinking about Harry and their date. Harry was such a mess yesterday. It wasn't the first time he had seen Harry crying, but it was the first time when the younger man cried in his arms. He saw him crying during school years, after Sirius's death or after the Battle, but it was never him who had to comfort Harry; he always wanted too, but he wasn't sure if he did the right thing yesterday.

He was lost in his thought, but thankfully his clock reminded him that he has a shop to open. In the shop, Severus first checked the potions that he let rest for the night. They were looking great; he stirred some of them. Then he checked who will pick up their orders today and he put them at the counter. After that, he turned the table to open and began to chop, measure and packed the potion ingredients. It was a usual quiet day. Customers came in, they bought a few things, ask idiot questions and annoyed him.

Around noon the door opened again, and Ronald Weasley walked in.

"Hello Sir," the redhead Auror greeted him nervously.

"Mr Weasley, nice to see you. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

Ron curiously looked around the shop, and his cheek started to get pink.

"I- Well… I'd like to ask if… Is it possible that maybe… Maybe Harry is here?"

Severus put down the knife, wiped his hand, and he came out counter.

"He isn't, but why would be here?"

Ron was getting more and more embarrassed.

"Well… I just thought he might be here. You know… Sleeping or making breakfast or something…"

Severus folded his arms, "You do realise Mr Weasley, that I do not live here?"

"Yes?" it was more a question than an answer. Ron nervously played with his Auror robe while he was looking everywhere but not Snape. He knew Severus was watching him with that kind of look that could make a child piss in their pans. He wasn't even blinking as he watched Ron, who couldn't take this studying look any longer.

"For Merlin's saint balls! Could you please not stare at me like that. I know you have a home, all right?! Listen, I know you and Harry had a date last night, and he didn't come to work at this morning, so I thought that maybe you two make the… you know… the next step. We're going to have a meeting at one, and I just wanted to ask him if he comes or not, because if he isn't, I have to find a damn good excuse why he isn't there."

Out of Ron's babbling, all Severus could have got it that Harry was missing.

"He didn't go to work?"

"No."

"Did you floo called him?"

"Honestly Snape! I know I'm not the smartest bloke in this country, but I'm not a troll. I checked, he isn't at home."

"Was everything normal?" he asked impatiently.

Ron sighed and said, "I haven't seen anything extraordinary."

"Did you check the protection? Was there any damaged on it? Did you scan the house for magical activity? And the street?"

"I'm not an Auror for nothing. Relax, okay?"

"RELAX?" Severus roared, he crossed the room and grabbed Ron's arm, "Harry is missing, and you're telling me to relax? And what kind of Auror you are? A member of your team didn't show up in the morning, and you wait 4 hours to start looking for him?"

"Excuse me that I didn't run to my best friend's home in the morning and kick down his door and ruined his possible chance to get laid by the guy he had waited for years!!!" yelled Ron. Severus grabbed his other arm and shook him.

"What if he was kidnapped?"

Ron let out a laugh and shook his head, "For fuck's sake, Snape! You're really paranoid! The war is over, remember?"

"I was kidnapped three months ago, remember?" asked back Severus sarcastically.

"And Hermione is locked up in St Mungo!" said Ron furiously.

Severus let Ron's arm go and stepped back. He looked horrified. "Granger," he whispered, "He visited Granger."

"What?"

It was Ron's turn to get surprised.

"He visited Granger yesterday," said Severus worried, "He was crying in my arms. He said everyone wants to leave him and he thought that life hates him."

Ron cracked his neck; it was one of his bad habits what Harry hated the most. Harry always said it sounded like he broke his bones.

"I see," he murmured and looked at Severus who still looked terrified, "I think Harry's fine."

"We have no idea where he is! How can this-"

"Okay, he isn't fine, but he isn't in danger," interrupted Ron, "Listen! No offence but I know Harry longer than you and I think I understand him a bit better. He just needs time now. He doesn't show or speak about it, but what happened with Hermione made him upset and not just what she did to you this whole situation. Fuck! We have been friends for more than ten years. It isn't easy for us!" Ron looked down at his watch, "Bloody hell, the meeting! I gotta go! Don't worry about Harry; he is fine!"

Before Severus could do or say anything, Ron rushed out of his shop and disapparated from his doorstep.

'Relax and don't worry! That Weasley lost his mind. How can I not worry when Harry was missing?' Severus thought. He ran upstairs threw floo powder into the fireplace and stood into the green flames.

"Harry Potter's home," he said clearly, but nothing happened. Damn protection! He stepped out of the flames and tried to make a floo call. He shouted Harry's name a few times, but he didn't get any answers. He ran back downstairs, and he was just about to leave his shop when a customer came in. Damn Shop! Severus served the customer and decided as soon as she would leave the shop, he would close and go to find Harry. But before the client could leave another one came in and after another. It looked like the customers were giving the door handle to each other. Of course, it has to be the busiest afternoon of the week! Severus didn't have a quiet moment for an hour.

Harry! If you get this letter, contact me immediately! Severus

After one hour of madness, he had two minutes to jot down that sentence and sent it away.

The afternoon was crazy. I seemed everyone in the Wizarding world decided to buy potions and ingredients on that damn afternoon. When there was somebody in the shop who Severus quite knew and trust a bit, he asked for a moment and ran upstairs to try another floo call, but he didn't succeed. He summoned his patronus, "Harry, are you all right? Please contact me!" His silver doe turned into a ball and disappeared. Severus went back to downstairs just to find three more customers to waiting for him. What the hell is happening here?

While he was serving his buyers, he was thinking about what Weasley said to him.

Harry needed time? For what? Thinking? Thinking of what? And why he wanted to be alone? If he has problems, why didn't he talk to somebody? Surely Harry knew he had friends to turn to and he had Severus too. Bullshit! Weasley was wrong; Harry was kidnapped! What if he somebody is torturing him right now? Severus would kill anybody who ever dared to lay a finger on his Harry!

For the last thought, Severus' hand stopped in the air, and another thing what Weasley had said came into his mind.

'To get laid by the guy whom he had waited for years' this is what Weasley had said. What if it was what Harry wanted yesterday and not cakes? What if he made a mistake when he didn't follow Harry into the house? What if now Harry was in another man's arm to get a good fuck to forget his problems? It can't be. Harry wasn't that type of guy, or was he? Severus didn't know because they haven't talked about this kind of things.

Severus gave back the change to the customers, and he saw the man said something, but he didn't hear anything. He was staring into the nothing. Did they take it too slow? Should he already have to make a move? Was that even slow? Three months with dating, holding hands and kissing and nothing else. Of course, teenagers would jump in bed in the first week but they weren't teenagers, and Severus didn't want just a quick round. His anxiety mixed with jealousy and anger. But he didn't know if he was angry at himself or some random stranger who had touched Harry or at Harry himself.

As the time went by he managed to suppress his jealousy and he convinced himself that Harry was missing because he was kidnapped. This is how he spent his afternoon: He sending letters, patronuses, trying to call Harry as many times as was possible and convincing himself that Harry was safe and sound and wasn't with another man. When exactly 6 o'clock a new customer stepped into his shop he needed to calm himself not to hex her. He served the woman as quickly as possible, threw his apron to the corner and closed his shop in no time. He apparated to Harry from his shop's doorstep.

Severus showed up the closest alley; he quickly looked around to make sure no one saw him. He ran to Harry's home, checking the street with every move, but it seemed quiet, and nobody was watching him. He stopped in front of the house, he looked up the building, but everything seemed normal. He knocked on the door. He decided if Harry didn't open the door after the second knocking he would go inside. He knocked again, and he heard that somebody was coming to the door. A moment later Harry opened the door. He looked unharmed, Severus sighed in relief, Harry was really fine. But then he noticed that Harry was wearing faded sweatpants and a large T-shirt. It was something like that you pick up when you dress up in a rush. He looked at Harry's face; he looked exhausted and tired, his hair was messier than ever. Severus' jealousy came back immediately and got angry too. So he was right, Harry really did spend the day with somebody else.

"Where have you been??" Severus almost shouted. His voice was demanding, close to something he used to use in the classroom.

"Well, good evening to you too," Harry said as leaned against to the wall.

"Answer me!"

Harry folded his arm and tiredly sighed, "What's this? Interrogation?"

"Drop the act, Potter and answer!"

"I didn't know I have to report all my movements to you!"

Severus lost his patience, he grabbed Harry's t-shirt and pulled the man closer, "Yes, you have to! Especially when your best friend, who - may I add – is your Auror partner too, shows up in my shop and asking me if you sleep in my bed because you didn't go to work! Then I tried to floo call you, sent you letters and two damn Patronus messages, but nothing! No answer and I worried myself sick, thinking that something had happened to you. The Death Eaters or a maniac serial killer captured you That you are lying in a cave half dead! So, yes Potter, you have to tell me!

Harry freed himself from Severus' hand and pushed him away.

"Oh, really? Is it how is going to be? I have to tell you where I went, with whom I talked and what I did? What else should I tell you? Should I floo call you at every evening and tell you that I washed my teeth? Do you want to know how many coffees I drink in one day? Hmm? I ate my vegetables at lunch, or you don't care about this? I AM NOT A CHILD ANYMORE, SNAPE!" yelled into Severus' face.

"THEN STOP ACTING LIKE ONE!" Severus yelled back.

"Fuck you!"

For Harry this conversation was over, he turned around and began to walk away, but Severus reached out for him, grabbed his elbow and yanked him back, "Don't turn your back on me when I'm talking to you!"

Harry swept away Severus hand again and pushed a man on his chest.

"I'm a grown-ass man, Snape! I can do whatever I want!"

"You know what, Potter! Do whatever you fucking want, I don't care!"

Through the disapparating Severus heard as Harry shouted 'Great' and slammed the door.

Chapter Text

One week.

Exactly one week had passed since Severus talked to Harry.

After Severus had arrived home, he destroyed his hall and the table in the kitchen. While he was wrecking his furniture, he was shouting and calling Harry all the names he could. His rampage lasted two hours, and when there weren't any plates to break, he went to sleep.

The next morning, Severus went to work and left his home as it was. In the shop, he brewed potions, packed ingredients and only talked if it was necessary. He stayed in the shop late, just not to think. He spent the next three days like this. On the third day, he cleaned up the mess he made, but only because he needed his coffee mug.

On Saturday he opened his shop what was unusual because he usually didn't work on weekends, but he needed something to do so, brewing and sorting ingredients seemed a good idea.

Severus didn't know what to think about what had happened. His mood was changing like the whimsical weather. Sometimes he was angry and calling Harry a stupid, arrogant, liar in his head. Those times Severus usual smashed what was in his hand. Then sometimes his anger suddenly changed into confusion and he just starred to the wall for hours and thinking about why Harry ran off to another man and didn't he talk to Severus about his problem? Why did he get anger instead just answer Severus' question? Severus knew he was a bit harsh when he 'attacked' Harry demanding answers, but Severus was just worried. Harry should have known now that Severus had a bad temper. And to why ran off with somebody else? Severus would give anything to Harry, even this, especially this. Although he decided to take everything slow and Severus thought they weren’t ready to be intimate, he would have broken his own rules for Harry.

After spending hours thinking about these questions and not finding any answers, his confusion turned into sadness. This was the worst part. He was familiar with anger and confusion, but sadness and emptiness were new for Severus. He missed Harry. Missed his voice and smile, his energetic vibes and his silly jokes. He missed his hugs and kisses and even in his worst state he couldn't hate the man.

The only thing he refused to think about that with whom Harry was. Severus hadn't had a good night sleep since that evening. He had nightmares about Harry being with somebody else. Harry choosing anybody in the world just not Severus. One night he even dreamed about that Harry chooses Voldemort instead of him. Severus woke up, screaming Harry's name, and he immediately threw up.

On Sunday afternoon (It was the fifth days that he hadn't speak or see Harry) a grey owl dropped a letter in front of him and flew out of the window. Severus eyed the letter for twenty minutes. There wasn't addressing on it, nor curses. Was it from Harry?

After twenty minutes of watching, what was utterly pointless, Severus realised if he didn't open the envelope he would never know what inside, so he tore open the paper. It wasn't from Harry, but he recognised the writing. It was from Ron, and the letter contained only one sentence.

He was in Godric's Hollow.

Severus felt that the letter in his hand became heavier with each moment. He was sitting on his coach, starring the wall and felt numb. How could he be that stupid? How could he think those horrible things about Harry? How can he suspect that Harry was shagging with somebody when he was only visiting his parent's grave?

Severus leaned back, rested his head on the sofa and closed his eyes. Behind his closed eyes he saw Harry. Harry as he was sitting next to his parent's grave. Severus wondered if Harry spent the whole day there? Maybe the night too. He remembered the curtain moved a bit before the lights went off in his bedroom. Maybe Harry waited for Severus to leave and he also left the house? What if Harry spent the whole night there? What if he hasn't slept all night, just sat there and cried? When Harry opened the door, he looked deathly exhausted.

Severus felt terrible. All, that Harry needed, on that day was a shoulder to cry on, a hug, emotional support, somebody who comfort him. But what Severus did? Imagine things that didn't exist and attacked Harry because of jealousy.

He hated himself.

That night Severus did something that he had never done before. He curled up in his bed, held his pillow close, and he was crying all night, calling Harry and saying sorry many times in the dark.

 ~*~

The only reason why he went to work on Monday was that he knew he would do something utterly stupid if he stayed home. Cutting and sorting ingredients always helped him to calm down, and brewing helped him to think. He needed to collect his thought because he planned to visit Harry in the evening.

Around noon, he closed his shop and went to the closest bakery to buy some lunch for himself. On the way back to his shop he spotted Harry in the crowd. He was wearing his Auror robe, his hair was messy as usual, and he was looking at Severus direction. Did he see Severus through the mass of people or not? Severus felt they were looking into each other eyes, but it was impossible, there were too many people moving down on the street. Severus took a few steps ahead, but Harry turned around and started to walk in the opposite direction. He could see Harry's figure when he stepped next to the wall and disapparated away.

People, all around him, was running like ants before the rain, but Severus was standing on the middle of the street, and he felt like somebody has cast a Body-Bind Curse on him.

Harry had run away from him.

No, it can't be. Maybe he hadn't even seen Severus on the street. It was crowded, so it's possible that Harry didn't even know Severus was there. But he turned around as soon as Severus started to move toward to him. Maybe he got an urgent message; after all, he was wearing his Auror robe.

It was like two Severus was fighting in his head. One was the optimist, thought Harry was working, he was busy and had something to do that's why he turned around. The other one was the pessimist. That part of him thought that Harry ran away because he didn't want to speak or see Severus anymore. Minutes passed, and Severus was still standing in the street, and maybe he remained there for the rest of the day if somebody didn't tell that he is blocking the way.

Severus walked back to his shop. He put his lunch in the kitchenette, but he lost his appetite. He turned the sign to open on the door and stand behind the counter.

'Don't think!' He warned himself, 'It's better if you don't start analysing what you saw. Not now. You will do it, when you're home, alone… Now, just focus on your job. Customer. Greeting. Answer the questions. Give the product. Tell the price. Take the money and give the change.'

And just like a robot, he spent the rest of his day like that. He only focused on his job and nothing else. At 6 o'clock he closed his shop. While he was casting the usual protection spells the feeling of being watched washed over him. Severus looked around. Other shopkeepers were closing their shop too; fewer people were walking on the street, they were walking home from work, but he didn't see anything unusual.

Severus sighed and began to walk home. He wasn't sure what to do. Should he visit Harry and try to talk to him or should he just go home and try to forget him. Forget… He would never forget him, and even if he could do that, he would never ever love anybody else. There was a time when he thought he would never fall in love, but it happened, and now he couldn't picture himself loving someone else. Of course, Severus noticed the handsome men on the street, but they were just good looking. He loved Harry because Harry was… Well, Harry was Harry, and that's why he loved him. And he knew it sounded ridiculous in his head, but it was the truth. With Harry, he felt safe, and not just because they were powerful together, but Harry made him feel whole. Harry made him feel, it's okay not to be okay, or it's alright to be sentimental, romantic, vulnerable. Harry made him smile, laugh and even brought out Severus' playful side what he didn't know he had. In the last three months, Harry began to fix Severus broken soul and showed a life what he didn't think he could have.

But it was gone now.

Severus felt the first tear-drops were rolling down on his cheek. He didn't want to anybody see him crying on the street so apparated home. Then, in the safety of his home, he didn't hold it back anymore. He sank to his knees and sobbed out loudly.

  ~*~

Severus woke up on the carpet. He was slightly panicking and confused, but then he sat up and looked around. When he recognised his living-room and noticed he was still wearing the same clothes as yesterday, he assumed that during his break down, he fell asleep. He went to the bathroom and took a shower. Severus felt embarrassed that something like this could happen to him. Sleeping on the carpet… Pathetic! He was wondering if he reached the point, where he should call Minerva. She always said Severus didn't have to deal with his problems alone. Surely Minerva would encourage Severus to talk to Harry, but Severus couldn't bear the thought that Harry might say, 'I don't want to see you ever again.'

He began the day in the shop by filling the shelves with ingredients. It was a quiet morning, and he absolutely didn't mind it. Some customers came to pick up their orders, and others gave him new ones. Severus felt numb all morning. It was surprising for him; he was waiting for another breakdown or burst of anger. His mood was still changeable.

Before noon he turned sign to close. Behind the cash register, there was a corridor with two rooms, one storage on the left side and a kitchenette on the right a little further. At the end of the corridor, there were the stairs to the basement where he had his laboratory and another storage room. Severus wasn't hungry, but he went to the kitchenette just to drink another unreasonably big portion of coffee. While he was making his coffee, he noticed a brown paper bag in the corner. He didn't remember to see it in the morning, but regarding what kind of night he had, he wouldn't even have noticed a troll. The paper bag was familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. But when Severus opened, he remembered. Inside, there were his muffins from yesterday what he just threw at the corner after seeing Harry. Severus forget his coffee, he leaned against the door and watched the corridor while he was holding the half-dried muffins.

A memory came back, and he saw Harry at the end of the corridor. Bright smile; snowflakes in his hair, and he was holding a similar paper bag. Severus saw himself to walked to him and kissed him.

"Something smells really good here. What's in the bag?"

Harry looked up at him and smiled, "I baked muffins for you."

Severus remember the warm feeling that spread in his chest for the thought that Harry did something just for him. He felt it again.

Harry lifted up his right hand, "I tried to make salty ones too. These have cheese and bacon chips inside," Harry lifted up his other hand, "These are chocolate with hazelnuts."

Severus tried to take one of the bags, but Harry pulled away.

"Uh-huh! You have to pay for it first," he said in a playful voice.

"Oh, and how much does a muffin cost?"

Harry tilted his head like he was really calculating a price then he said, "Well the sweets are two kisses, but the salty ones only cost one kiss because they're in the testing period."

Severus grabbed Harry's waist, pulled him close and kissed him passionately. When the parted Harry was close to fainting.

"What do you think how many muffins I earned for a kiss like this?"

"I haven't baked enough for this."

Severus leaned to Harry's ears and whispered, "I think we will be able to make a fair deal," then he kissed Harry's neck.

The memory was too sweet, too happy, too perfect and Severus couldn't bear it anymore; he threw the bag across the corridor what landed in the storage room broke some of his phials. The tinkling sound of the breaking phials clicked something inside him, and he knew his rampage came back. Severus rushed to the storage room and started to smash the phials, cauldrons and papers to the wall. He didn't care if they were empty or not, he wanted to break everything. He destroyed the only happiness he had ever had why shouldn't he destroy everything? Job? A shop? Happiness? A life? He didn't deserve all his.

He was a failure! A mistake, how his father told him every time he saw him. And after a while, Severus believed it. He thought that he wasn't worth it, wasn't enough, he was always everybody's last choice. He was a mistake.

He was a failure, nothing more! He hated himself because he kept repeating the same mistake over and over again.

Severus pushed over the table making his carefully organised research papers to flow up in the air. He picked up another phial from the shelf, and he was about to threw it when he heard the front door opened and the little bell above the door ringed.

"I'm closed!" Severus barked out of the storage room and smashed the phial to the wall. He immediately picked up another one. His hand was in the air when a familiar voice spoke behind him.

"I know, that's why I came in."

Severus' hand stopped in the air, he turned around and starred the man in front of him. It wasn't a dream nor an imagination. It was real, Harry with his messy hair, beautiful green eyes and with a curiously look was standing right in front of him.

"Harry," Severus breathed, shocked.

"What's going on here?" Harry asked as peered behind Severus. The room was already half-damaged.

"I'm destroying my storage," admitted Severus entirely honestly. Harry only hummed and looked from the room to Severus's hands and finally up into his eyes. Harry looked tired; his skin was pale, there were black bags under his eyes, and he looked skinnier than a week before. He looked as terrible as Severus. Harry was wearing a green shirt with a black tie and black trousers, he looked elegant, but his whole appearance screamed that it was forced.

"Would you like to have lunch with me? I bought ham and cheese sandwiches; we can grill them if you are hungry and not too busy doing… Well, whatever you were doing."

Lunch? At that point, Severus would do anything with Harry. He didn't even care if they spend the rest of their life just standing next to the half-destroyed storage and staring each other. But Severus couldn't say anything; he only nodded and watched Harry as he stepped into his little kitchenette. Severus leaned against the door and looked down his hand; he was still holding the empty phial what he wanted to smash to the walls only a minute ago. He heard, in the kitchenette, Harry started to unwrapped the sandwiches. So that's it? Are they going to have lunch as nothing happened? They will talk about their day and avoid the emotions again or the fact that Severus destroyed one of his room? No, Severus decided. This time he would do it differently. Even if Harry didn't want to talk about this right now, Severus needed to say something. If nothing else, at least an apology, but he needed to say it.

He placed the phial on the first free spot he saw and turned around to run into the kitchen what was only a few steps away. After the first step he heard the phial fall off and broke, but he didn't care. One more broken glass didn't matter.

As he wanted to step into the kitchenette, Harry decided to turn around to ask something, the next moment they bumped into each other. Severus automatically wrapped his hand around Harry to make sure he wouldn't fall. Harry looked up at Severus a bit in confusion. Green eyes met with the blacks, and it seemed the World stopped spinning. A little voice in Severus' head reminded him that he had to say an apology, but then again Severus had to realise that those green eyes could make his brain stop functioning properly.

"Harry, I'm so-" Severus began, but he couldn't finish.

Two hands slipped up to his neck; Harry stood on tiptoe, "I know," he whispered before he kissed Severus.

He knew? What did he know? He knew how Severus regret that he thought those horrible things about Harry? How he woke up screamingly every night from nightmares? How he hated himself when he found out the truth? How was he crying and calling Harry in the dark? These were the questions that Severus didn't get the answers. What he got was a bit hesitant, slow, tender kiss.

Harry was pulling Severus closer and closer with every moment and deepening the kiss. It seemed Harry wanted to melt into Severus, became one with him through the kiss.

Severus rational thinking part was screaming only for 2 seconds to stop the kiss because they needed to talk, but Severus' heart won this battle. What Harry meant when he said he knows didn't matter anymore, because Harry was here. He was in Severus' arm again, and Harry was kissing him. And Severus was kissing Harry, and they were so close that Severus felt Harry's heartbeat.

When Severus started to feel a little dizzy, he knew that his lungs didn't get enough oxygen, but the thought to break apart from Harry's lips was so painfully. It seemed he wasn't the only one who thinks like that because when he tried to lean back just to get a little dose of oxygen Harry's lips was immediately following his and caught them. Between kisses, they tried to get oxygen from the other's mouth, but in the end, they only made themselves panting, and their kissing became a mess.

Severus was close to losing all his self-control. Like every other time when he was kissing Harry, he felt it wasn't enough. After one week, not knowing if he could taste Harry again he was on the edge of his patience. He wanted Harry. Ha wanted to touch, kiss and feel every little part of his body. He wanted to claim Harry. Wanted to bite into his sensitive skin, put a mark on it, so everybody could know Harry was taken.

Severus moved his hand from Harry's waist to his stomach, search for the gap between the buttons and when he found it, he slipped one of his fingers in, to feel Harry's warm skin. He knew all he had to do is move his finger up and the button would give up and then he could slip his whole hand in.

But before he could move, Harry's stomach decided to growl loudly.

The sound surprised Severus, and his eyes snapped open. He leaned back and looked at Harry, whose cheek turned to impossibly red and he hid his face into Severus' chest.

"Oh, God! It's so embarrassing!" Harry murmured. Severus couldn't help, he chuckled and kissed Harry's neck lightly.

"Would it make you feel better if I say I'm hungry too?" Harry shook his head, and the only thing Severus could do just smiled fondly, "Let's eat those sandwiches what you brought, okay?"

Severus' finger didn't stop stroking Harry's skin. He heard at every little movement made Harry sigh and shake a bit. An inappropriate picture came into Severus' mind, what if he would move his hand down, just a little. What sound would Harry make? But Severus controlled himself, and with one last caress, he released Harry, who immediately went back to the sandwiches.

"So, these are ham and cheese sandwiches, but I made a few modifications. I hope it's okay. I used smoked cheese, and…. Well, the butter isn't traditional either. I put some spice in it; I hope you don't mind. I haven't tasted it yet… Maybe it tastes awful and…"

Severus hugged Harry from behind and rested his head on his right shoulder, "Stop babbling, Harry! You perfectly know I adore your cooking, so I'm sure I'll like whatever you made."

Harry turned his head to Severus, their nose touched, they both smiled, but the next moment Harry gently kissed Severus again. Severus sighed happily; it seemed Harry had a hard time to stay away from Severus' lips. He turned around in Severus embrace and leaned them to the counter. Harry took over the dominance of the kiss, made it more sensual than innocent. Severus hands from Harry's back moved down to his bum, and he lifted up Harry to sit on the top of the counter. Harry wrapped his legs around Severus' waist and began to leaning back make Severus almost lay on him.

It was obvious, Harry wanted more, but he wasn't sure what. He was pulling Severus closer with his legs, keeping himself in half lying position with his stomach muscle and with his hands. Severus lost all his self-control when Harry rolled his hips. With one hand he grabbed Harry's waist and thrust between his legs. Harry moaned in the kiss, and it made Severus wilder. This time his fingers easily found the gap between the buttons and with a quick move Severus' hand was on Harry's stomach. He grabbed Harry's waist again, dug his fingers in the soft but muscled skin and thrust again. Harry broke the kiss and moaned out loudly.

Severus was slowly rubbing their body together, while he was moving from Harry's lips to his neck, leaving hot kisses on the way. When he reached his neck, Severus dig his fingers again in Harry's skin, hold Harry in place and thrust again. That sweet sound what Harry made, would make wild any man or woman in the universe and Severus knew he was the edge of his good manners.

But then Harry's stomach growled again, but Harry acted as nothing happened. He tilted his head back to make more free space for Severus, but what he didn't see was the cupboard behind him. As he leaned his head back he hit the cupboard so hard, the cups clattered. Severus laughed out.

"Ow!" Harry groaned, "I'm pathetic. Sorry."

Severus leaned back, pulled Harry with himself back into the sitting position and ran through his hand in his hair, rubbing his head where Harry hit it.

"You are not pathetic. It's just not exactly the good time, nor place for doing such things as this."

Severus gently kissed Harry's forehead, then his nose and in the end, he kissed him on his mouth. This kiss was slow, tender, nothing sexual. As painful as it was Severus knew he had to let die his arousal. They needed to talk. But first of all, they needed to eat and get back to their jobs. Severus stopped the kiss and looked into Harry's eyes.

"We should eat," he said quietly.

Harry wickedly smirked at Severus and gently bite his lower lips, "I'm eating."

"Chewing my lips doesn't count, and it certainly doesn't contain all the necessary vitamins and minerals what you need."

"Are you sure?"

Severus almost snorted and said 'Yes Potter, I'm sure.' but he just rolled his eyes, "Come on, let's grill those sandwiches."

But when Severus stepped back, Harry reached out, pulled him back and hugged him. Severus stand completely frozen in Harry's embrace, and he really didn't know what was happening. Harry's back was shaking a bit, and Severus couldn't decide if Harry was silently crying or still panting from their kissing. Did he overstep a line what he shouldn't have to?

"I've missed you so much," Harry whispered.

Severus hugged Harry and placed a kiss into his messy hair, "I've missed you too, Harry."

He knew Harry wouldn't let him go, so he stepped closer to the sandwich maker, and he pulled Harry with himself. Then with one hand he opened the already heated machine and put two sandwiches in it, after that he went back to rubbing Harry's back and hugging him. Two minutes later a green light lit up, and the sandwich maker clicked. Severus took out the bread and put in another two ones. He waved his hand, cast a cooling charm and squeezed Harry's arm.

"Harry, the first two is ready. Let's eat, okay?"

Severus helped Harry down from the top of the kitchen counter and gave him one of the sandwiches. His shirt was hanging out from his trousers, and Harry tried to tuck in back with one hand, and Severus tried to pretend that he didn't stare.

The silence became uncomfortable, so Severus asked the first question that came to his mind, "So what's your new case?"

"My new case?" Harry asked back in confused.

"What you have the meeting of."

"How do you know I'll have a meeting?"

"You're wearing a tie."

Harry' mouth was full with the third sandwich, what he ate in record time, and all he could do was just hum and gave a question look to Severus.

"You only dress up this elegantly when you have a meeting. And you only have meetings when you have a new case. You look great, by the way."

"Thank you," mumbled Harry blushingly.

"So what is the case? Or is it Ministry secrets and you cannot talk about it?"

"I don't have a new case," said Harry as he reached for his fourth sandwich and opened a bottle of water, "But you're right, I'll have a meeting. I'm going to meet with my trainees."

"With who?"

"My trainees. Ron and I got promoted to be trainers. Do you remember Mark in my team? That hyperactive young browned hair boy who reminds me of Colin. He had an exam, or test or something, and the Ministry thinks he learnt the most since he left the Academy, and they think it would be better if the freshly graduated Aurors were pair with well-trained wizards. So we can protect them, teach them things that they can't learn in the school and things like that. The Academy had chosen a few Aurors to be trainers. It's in the testing period, but if it's successful, they will make it permanent."

Severus dropped everything that was in his hand and hugged Harry, "That's amazing, Harry! Congratulations! I'm so proud of you!"

"Thank you," said Harry in embarrassed, "But it's only temporary."

"But it's still a huge thing! Did you celebrate it?"

"Well… Ron and I had a butterbeer on the Ministry's steps."

"A butterbeer? What a celebration!" Severus shook his head, "We have to celebrate this properly with champagne and dinner. Tomorrow, perhaps?"

Harry looked up at Severus, his cheek was red again, but his eyes were shining, "I'd love that," he said shyly. And then again the silence came back again. After a few minutes, Severus spoke again.

"Is that mean you will have less free time?" He asked curiously. He really wished after what happened he had a chance to spend as much time as he used to with Harry.

"I don't think so. Usually, newbies get easy cases. I think first we will only patrol around in the city. Checking out dark places and looking for illegal business at the Knockturn Alley."

They ate the rest of the sandwiches, and Harry asked Severus if he saw anything suspicious lately in the area. Severus heard about a woman who died because overdosed some kind of drug, but in Severus' opinion, she was killed. Harry promised to check it up when he got back to his office.

At one o'clock Harry sighed when the clock on the wall rang. Severus hugged Harry and gently pushed to the door.

"Go, don't be late! The first impression is always important, and be strict, or they will never respect you."

"In that case, can I borrow your black robe?" asked Hary.

"My robe? Why do you need my robe?"

"Because then I can spring open the door, storm in with floating cloak and say, 'There will be no foolish wand-waving'!" said Harry with a mischievous smile.

"Cheeky brat!" Severus laughed and kissed Harry's cheek, "I'll call you in the evening. Now go, Mister Auror Trainer Potter!"

Harry took a few steps forward then he suddenly turned back and kissed Severus fiercely. When they parted, he looked like he wanted to say something but the next moment he ran out of the shop. On the street, he cast a spell on himself to fix his clothes and turned back. Harry cheerfully waved to Severus, and then he disapparated.

~*~

After Harry left, Severus spent the rest of the day half working, half dreaming. At home, he realised how nervous he was to call Harry what was ridiculous because they had just spent one hour with talking (and almost making out) at noon, so what could possibly go wrong this time? With shaking hands, Severus threw the floo powder into the fire and called out Harry's name. A few moments later Harry came in the view and sat down in front of his fireplace

"Hey there," he said in a tired voice. He wasn't wearing his elegant clothes, but a faded big t-shirt and pants. He was resting his head on his knees.

"I couldn't reserve a table for tomorrow evening," said Severus nervously, "They only have free tables on Friday, so I booked one for that evening. Is it okay?"

Minutes have passed; Harry was staring into the fire and didn't say anything.

"Harry?"

"Huh?"

"Is Friday all right for you?"

"Yes. It's perfect. Friday is perfect."

"Is everything okay?" asked Severus, worried.

"I'm so tired," said Harry as ran his hand through his hair, "I've got too much information in too little time, and I feel my brain will explode."

Severus laughed a little, "Then I suggest you put your cute little brain in a bed."

"Do you think my brain is cute?" Harry asked, but his eyes were already closed.

"It's the cutest. Harry! Open your eyes! Don't fall asleep on the floor; you will catch a cold.

Harry opened his eyes and smiled at Severus. He was sleepy Severus could see it.

"Good night, Sev,"

Severus watched as Harry walked out of the room, he waited for a few minutes then closed the floo connection. He sat on his couch and watched the flames in the fireplace. Friday.

On Friday they will fix this. On Friday he will make sure to have that talk.

Chapter Text

On Friday evening, at half-past six, Severus was waiting for Harry before his shop. He carefully planned their evening, and he found it perfect. All he had to do was stick with it, and he was great following plans. Especially brilliant ones and, of course, his plan was that.

Harry was punctual, what was also important to make the evening successful.

"Hello," Harry greeted Severus with a shy smiley, "Where are you taking me?"

Severus took Harry's hand, "It's a surprise. Ready?"

Harry nodded, and Severus apparated themselves to a dark empty alley. They looked around to make sure nobody was there; then Harry pulled Severus closer for a kiss.

"Hi," Severus whispered between the kisses, then they both giggled like teenagers.

"We have to go. If we're late, they will give our table to somebody else."

Holding hands, Severus began to lead Harry, who was looking around curiously to figure out which port of the city they were, but the neighbourhood wasn't familiar.

After a few minutes walking Severus stopped near a rather high glass building.

"We are here," he said shyly.

"The Sky Tower?" asked Harry, stunned.

The Sky Tower was one of the most popular and exclusive restaurants in London. It was unique because it was on the top floor of a skyscraper and the view was breath-taking. There were rumours that you have to pay even if you want to book a table.

"Yes," answered Severus softly, but Harry's reaction wasn't what he expected.

"No, Severus. No!" Harry stepped back, and tried to pull Severus away from the entrance like he was afraid if they went too close they would get stuck inside, "This is too much! Too expensive, too elegant. I don't deserve this."

"Harry, please. You have achieved something brilliant, and it's a good place to celebrate it."

"But! I've got promoted to be a trainer not the Ministry of Magic!" Harry protested.

"Please, Harry, don't fight with me, not tonight. I always wanted to come here, and I know you too, this is just a perfect excuse to have dinner here."

"But it's so expensive," Harry shook his head, "I don't want you to spend that much money on me."

"Once in a while, I can afford a little squandering, and anyway, the business was really good lately. So, please, don't worry about that." Severus kissed Harry and then held his cheek in his hand, "Have dinner with me here, my little lion."

Harry blushed and nodded, "Well, then lead the way, my Prince."

Just to hid his pink cheeks Severus hurried to the entrance. In the elevator Harry was squeezing Severus' hand, he got more and more excited as they were going up.

"It won the best restaurant price five times in a row, and the critics love the kitchen, and everybody says the staff are super friendly."

Severus just smiled; Harry was acting like a child on Christmas morning. After the elevator had stopped, they stepped out in the hall of the restaurant. Harry with wide eyes and opened mouth looked around, and all he could do was gaping like a fish.

"Excuse his behaviour," said Severus to the host who greeted them, "I think he's in a shock now."

"There's nothing to worry about, Sir. Almost every second guest has the same expression. May I have your name?"

"Snape. Table for two, at seven."

"Oh, yes. Follow me, please."

Severus had to drag Harry trough the restaurant because he was just staring at everything and always stopped moving. Their table was near the window. When Harry stood close to the window, Severus' heart skipped a beat. He was never fond of the high, which was a bit weird because he could fly without a broom, but it was different. He always had to take a double dose of Calming Potion before every Quidditch match.

"Look Severus; we can see the whole city from here! There's the London Eye, and if I stand on my toes, I can see the Big Ben too."

Severus hugged Harry from behind and pulled away from the window, "Please don't stand there, it gives me creeps."

"Sorry, I forget you don't like the high."

At that evening for the second time, Harry found himself in Severus' embrace, and he absolutely didn't mind it. Before they could kiss, a tall, handsome blonde guy, stepped to their table, he looked a bit embarrassed. They encouragingly smiled at him, and they sat down.

"Good evening Sirs, my name's Nick, I'll be your waiter tonight."

"Nice to meet you, Nick. This fine young man here," said Severus and he pointed at Harry, "got promoted last week. Can we have two glasses of your special champagne for celebrating?"

"Certainly Sir. I'll be back in a minute. Here are your menus, on the first page you will find the Chef's special offer, which I highly recommend."

Harry opened the menu and almost closed it again; the prices were higher than he expected.

"Are you sure about this dinner?" he asked.

"Positive," answered Severus not even looking up from his menu. Harry sighed, he felt he really doesn't deserve this. The waiter came back with their champagne, and when he put it in front of Harry, he politely congratulated for Harry's promotion.

"What's special about this champagne?" Harry asked. His drink looked as usual as it could be: yellow liquid with bubbles. Severus held up his glass and swirled it. Along the bubbles, little golden things were floating in the champagne.

"Do you see those tiny golden laminas? Those are real gold pieces."

"Woah! Really? Is it safe to drink it?"

"Yes, this is the new trend."

Harry lifted up his own glass and swirled it, his golden laminas came alive too and now they were happily swimming in his glass. "What crazy things can people make!" he thought, and then he suddenly started to laugh. Severus looked up from his menu and rose his eyebrow.

"What's so funny?"

"If I drink this," said Harry, "I really will be the Golden Boy."

Severus also laughed, but he didn't do it because of what Harry had said; he admitted it was funny too but what made him smile was Harry himself. The way he was sitting and joking like they were used to do. Severus thought it was a good sign and he was more determinate to stick with his plan.

They clinked their glasses, Severus congratulated Harry again, and they had chosen what to eat. Then Severus asked about Harry's meeting and the trainees, and Harry asked about potions and the business. The conversation flowed easily, like fluffy clouds on the blue sky, they held hands, and Harry was making Severus smile during the whole eating. The night was perfect, and Severus felt more and more confident. He thought if they couldn't manage to talk this evening, then they never will.

Harry had chosen brownie for dessert, it was delicious, but after the first bite Harry put down his fork and fished his wand out of his trousers. A disguise, a shield and a muffilato spell were around them before even Severus could ask why Harry needed his wand. The next moment a blue ball turned up next to their table, and it started to speak in Ronald Weasley familiar voice.

"Harry, mate, I'm sorry, but we really need your help right now, because I don't remember if we have ever learned anything about dragon-lions in Hagrid' class."

"It's a Chimaera, not dragon-lion!" shouted another voice.

"I bloody don't care what's called, when it-," the rest of Ron's sentence vanished into a dreadful roar, "Harry, we are in the red factory building where we caught the diamond thief. Sorry to drag you here, but Robertson isn't here and –" there was another roar, "we need you!"

After Ron's shining ball disappeared Harry immediately stood up, and he was ready to leave, but at the corner of his eyes he caught Severus' look; it was between shock and anger.

"You're on duty tonight," Severus' voice was dangerously quiet, but Harry could hear out that he forced down his temper. 

"Yes," said Harry quietly as he sat back.

"But you have said Friday is fine! Why did you say that if you knew you had to work?"

Harry bowed down his head and watched the tablecloth. He couldn't bear Severus' angry look.

"Why?" Severus asked angrily.

Harry lifted up his head and looked into Severus' burning eyes. "Because I wanted to be with you again," he said softly. Severus' expression softened, and when Harry reached out to take his hand, he didn't pull away.

"I've missed you so much and that week was hell," Harry continued, "When you mention the dinner, all I could think was that I could spend time with you again. I was already half asleep when you asked about Friday. The next day I realised my mistake, but I didn't want to call our dinner off because I didn't want you to think I don't like spending time with you, or I don't like you anymore. I told Ron, and he said, he would cover for me, and he will only call me if it's emergency. I’m sorry Severus! Truly. Please, don't be mad at me! I was hoping nothing would happen and we can spend time together again like we used to… Please."

Severus squeezed Harry's hand, then he waved with the other, so the disguise was gone. Then he pulled Harry up and hugged him.

"Go now," said Severus as he placed a kiss in Harry's black hair. He couldn't say he wasn't angry, because he was or maybe anger wasn't the right word for it. Severus was disappointed. "Your team is in danger. But I warn you, Potter! If you managed to hurt yourself tonight, I'm going to heal you, and then I'm going to kick your ass so hard that you cannot sit on a broom ever again."

"Don't worry; I'll be careful," when Severus raised his eyebrow, Harry added, "okay, more careful than usual."

Nick, the waiter, stepped to the table, "Sirs, Is everything all right?"

Severus kissed Harry's cheek, "Go, I'll take care of this," he said then he turned to Nick, "Bring me the bill, please."

Harry ran out of the restaurant, and Severus turned to the windows; he knew the other guests were watching him. It was already dark outside, and from up there London looked stunning. Well, if you have a perfect plan, but it involves other people you have to make sure they also follow the steps. Finding out that Harry should have been on duty tonight definitely wasn't the part of his plan. Severus sometimes wondered if it was their fate, no matter how much they wanted to be together it looked like the rest of the world didn't want them together. Before he could have been lost in his pessimist thought somebody grabbed his elbow to make him turn around. Harry was standing in front of him again.

"Come with me!" said Harry.

"What?"

"Come with me," he repeated, "I have never faced a Chimaera before and I, to be honest, have no idea what to do, and I'm sure one more wand won't hurt in the fight. So come with me!"

In the same moment, the waiter came back with the bill followed by another man who looked like the manager.

"Good evening Sirs, I'm Parker Lowery, the manager. May I ask why do you want to leave so suddenly?" he asked.

"Mr Lowery, sorry for making a situation like this in your restaurant. We had a great time here, but we are police officers, and you see, criminals don't care if you have a date or not.

We got an urgent call, and we have to leave immediately. Everything was perfect, the champagne, the duck, and, oh my God, I loved the brownie. Thank you for everything, we will definitely come back another time; hopefully, we can stay longer to enjoy your hospitality." sputtered Harry; he knew all the other guest were watching them, while Severus was paying the bill.

The manager didn't have a chance to reply because Harry grabbed Severus' hand and they ran out of the restaurant together. They jumped into the elevator and pushed the button to go down, but downstairs the doorman only found an empty elevator; Harry and Severus disapparated away as soon as the door closed behind them.

They had landed in front of a rusty dark red building. According to the faded company sign once it was a yarn factory. Severus could smell the water in the air, so he assumed they weren't far away from the Thames. With a flick of their wand they both changed their clothes to something that was more suitable for fighting, Harry was wearing his Auror robe, and Severus was wearing his usual black outfits with his floating black robe.

They stepped into the building. Outside there were the street lights, but inside it was darker, the only light was the moonlight what can come through the broken windows. Harry couldn't decide it would be good to cast a Lumos or not.

"How are we going to find them?" he asked.

"We're going to listening," said Severus and lit up his wand. Harry wanted to complain, but Severus already held up his hand. They were waiting for something, but Harry could only hear his heart what was beating in his ears. He wanted to run, but he knew the factory building was big with a lot of corridors, and it was easy to get lost, but he was panicking. Ron was in danger! What if they had arrived late? He couldn't lose Ron, his best friend, his brother and he couldn't lose his team. Mark, he was so young, Justin had just moved in with his girlfriend, and Alex had just announced that he would get married at the next summer. They were so young with full of life; Harry couldn't let them die. He had to save them! He almost snapped at Severus, but then he heard the Chimaera' roar. It was coming from the right side of the building. They started to run in that direction, through tumbledown corridors and broken doors. The roar was getting louder with each step.

"When we enter the room cast the Patronus charm," said Severus.

"Why? Is it working against Chimaera too?"

"No, but our patronuses look like something what they normally eat in the wild. It will confuse them, and we can win a little time for ourselves."

"Oh, okay. Good idea." Harry was chewing his lips while they were running. Severus saw that he was more lost in his thought what would happen if they hadn't arrived in time, than thinking about the fight.

"Potter!" said Severus seriously, "Pull yourself together! We're going to save them!"

Hearing his last name in a voice that Severus only use when the situation is serious made Harry stop asking the umpteen 'What if' question and concentrate. They heard the roar again; it was more clear this time. Severus turned right at the next corner. At the end of the corridor, there was a two-winged door, and they knew, behind that they would face the beast. They exchanged looks then nodded; then next moment they kicked the door and shouted "EXPECTO PATRONUM" at the same time. A stag and a doe busted out of their wand and began to run to search for the dementors what they were supposed to chase away.

Their shout and the silvery-grey shining light got the attention of the Chimaera, but Severus and Harry saw surprised that there was not one, but two beasts in the room. The trick worked, but there was no time for gapping; they didn't know how long would their patronuses last. They ran to Ron and Mark, who took advantage of the opportunity to hide behind some half-broken furniture.

"Where are Justin and Alex?"

Mark, who was sitting on the ground, and he had difficulty breathing lift up his hand and pointed to the other side of the room. Harry swung around and wondered how he didn't notice that a giant plant took up the half of the room. It has many tendrils, and Justin along with Alex was stuck in there.

"Devil's snare," stated Harry.

"It fears of the light and the fire," continued Severus, who already lifted up his wand.

"But not this one," Ron cut in "It's a mutant, or I don't know. It only makes it more aggressive."

"That's not possible."

Before one of them would have spoken again, a panting whistle sound turned back their attention to Mark. Harry kneeled down next to him and gently shook him.

"Mark, what's wrong with you?"

"He's allergic to cat's fur, and the Chimaera is half cat, he has seizures," answered Ron.

"It's- It's three-quarters a cat," corrected Mark between panting.

"And no matter how bad his condition he still can be a geek," Ron shook his head.

Severus also kneeled down and pulled out a phial of his pocket, he opened it and held it under Mark's nose, "Take deep breathes, it will help you to breathe normally again, but it's only temporary." Mark did what he was told, and after the second deep breath his whistling breathing was dying away, but there was another thing to worry about. Suddenly the room became darker, and they didn't need to turn around to know the patronuses faded away. The dreadful roar made it clear the beasts were after them now. Two Chimaeras was slowly walking in their direction.

"We tried everything," said Ron and pointed his wand one of the Chimaera, "but nothing worked. Justin and Alex are 'safe' up there because until they don't move the Devil's snare doesn't do anything with them and it doesn't let the beasts near. My Plan B was to catch ourselves with the plant too until you arrive."

"These are strong magical creatures only special caretaker can stop them and killing them is almost impossible. They have a magical aura that's why the spells don't work on them, but ... I've got an idea," said Severus and pulled out other phials of his pocket.

"How that is possible that he always has potions in his pocket?" asked Ron, stunned.

"I have no idea, mate. But it's so sexy, isn't it?" said Harry, who was watching between the beasts and Severus. He has an amused smile on his face.

Then Ron smacked his fingers in front of Harry's face, "Mate, concentrate!" but Harry just smiled at him.

Severus opened the bottles and made the liquids fly in the air; then he turned them into two balls.

"These are strong sleeping potions," he said, "Now we just have to figure out how to make them swallow it."

"We can fly," suggested Harry, and the next moment his Firebolt was in his hand, "I fly with my broom, you can fly without it." Harry turned to Mark, "Can you run just a little?"

"I can try," said Mark. His breathing was normal again.

"Great! Ron and Mark start to run into two different directions, the Chimaeras will chase them, and it will keep them busy so they won't notice when we fly close to them. When they open their mouth, we throw the potions."

"I don't think it's a good idea," protested Severus.

"There's no time for Plan B! RUN!" shouted Ron and pushed Mark to the opposite direction.

A moment later one of the Chimaeras jumped exactly on the same spot where they had stood. The Chimaera who jumped there immediately started to chase Ron; the other one was after Mark because Severus turned into his black smoked flying form. Harry jumped on his broom and flew after Ron.

"Severus, throw the potion," shouted Harry. A shiny little ball was flying in his direction from the black smoke. Harry easily catch the ball, like he was playing Quidditch. Harry saw Ron was running into a dead end; the Chimaera was about to jump on him. Harry knew this was a perfect time. He flew with incredible speed to the beast and when it opened his mouth to roar he threw the ball into his mouth. For a moment, it shocked the animal, but it only shook its head and was about to attack Ron again.

"It doesn't work!" he yelled. He flew to Ron who was already trap between broken furniture and the wall. Ron lifted up his hand and Harry grabbed it, then he threw Ron behind the pile of furniture. Unfortunately, with his little action, he drew attention to himself and the Chimaera jumped after him and caught the end of his broom. Harry lost control over his broom and flew into a cupboard. He landed on the floor with a loud puff, and his broom had fallen a few meters further. Harry automatically lifted his hands to cover his face; he was waiting for the Chimaera to jump on him, but nothing happened. The next moment he heard a thump and the factory building became silence. Harry lifted up his head; the Chimaera was sleeping only a few centimetres from his leg.

"Ron?" Harry shouted.

Behind the pile of broken furniture came Ron's tired voice, "I'm fine. Mark?" But there wasn't any reaction. "Mark?" Ron yelled again.

Harry immediately sat up; it made him dizzy. He looked at the other side of the room, "Severus?"

Severus was back to his human form, and he was kneeling next to Mark, who was lying on the ground.

"He's going to be fine, just fainted because the potion effect wore off and he had another seizure," Severus informed the others then he levitated Mark's body far away from the beasts.

Harry pulled out his wand and cast a spell; a blue square appeared in the air.

"It's Auror Potter speaking! I need reinforcements in the old Yarn Factory in east London! We need Magical Creature specialists; there are two sleeping Chimaeras and a modified Devil's snare. We also need healers and the St. Mungo's ready for three injured Aurors. And if anybody sees Auror Robertson tell him to move his lazy ass here too!"

After Harry finished speaking, he tapped his wand to the blue square, and it vanished. He went to Severus, who was curiously watching the Devil's snare. Whenever he stepped closer to the plant, it started to move, squeezing Alex and Justin more.

"I've never seen a plant this aggressive," said Severus.

"How are we going to free them?"

"I don't know. Devil's snare only lets its victim goes if there's light or the victim is dead."

Harry took a step forward, and the plant became vivid, but as soon as he stepped back, it was calm again.

"What if we cast Petrificus Totalus on them? They will turn into a 'rock' and maybe the plant will sense them as dead."

"Hmm… Actually… That's not a bad idea; maybe it won't work but worth to try it. After we cast the spell, and the plant starts to leave them, immediately start to levitate them because if they fall they can get seriously injured. Ready?"

Harry nodded and took a step closer to Severus.

"Petrificus Totalus," said Severus in deep calm voice and Alex's body froze. One minute passed in tense silence. Harry couldn't believe his eyes when the Devil's snare slowly began to loosen up around Alex's body. They cast the spell together and carefully levitated Alex next to Mark. Then they turned back and repeated the process with Justin too. When the two men were on the ground safely, they cast Finite on them. Alex and Justin were shocked and confused at first, but Harry and Ron were at their side to comfort them. Severus went back to Mark to check on him.

"I'm sorry," Harry said to his teammates, "It's all my fault. I should have been here with you, guys."

"No! Robertson should have been here, he's our team leader!" said Ron.

"But you always say I’m the true leader of this team. What kind of leader left their team behind just to have dinner with -"

"With somebody who's important to you!" interrupted Justin.

"He is right," said Alex, his voice was hoarse, "We all know Snape is important to you, so stop it! We all wanted you to make up with him, and we all agree on let you go tonight. It's not your fault."

Severus tried to pretend not to hear what Harry and his teammates were talking about, but it was impossible, they were too close. He didn't know that Harry's colleagues support him that much.

"Soooo…," said Justin wickedly smiling, "How was your date?"

"It was beautiful," murmured Harry, he knew that Severus could hear them.

"Where did he take you?"

"To the Sky Tower."

Justin whistled, "Blimey! That's something!"

"Damn! I'm so hungry!" moaned Ron. All of them laughed loudly.

The sound of several apparitions cough their attention, and although neither Justin nor Alex was able to lift up their head they saw on the other's face, the reinforcements had arrived. There's was only a moment of shock on the Magical Creature caretaker's face then they immediately began to cast a magical cage for the Chimaeras. Two healers rushed to them, one kneeled down next to Mark and examined his state. Severus answered all her questions and hand over the potion what Mark was breathing in. After the healers apparated away with Mark, Severus stood up and touched his upper arm, his face expression immediately changed. Harry watched the whole scene; he excused himself from the others and walked to Severus.

"Severus, did you get hurt?"

"I'm fine."

"That’s not the answer for my question. Is your arm hurting?"

"Yes," said Severus and stopped Harry, as he tried to check Severus's arm, "You don't have to worry about this. It's nothing, really. I'll take a potion when I get home."

"Go with the healers, for me, please. I want somebody to check on you."

Severus fondly smiled at Harry, and gently caressed his cheek. There was nobody else in this World who was as thoughtful as Harry and Severus almost forgot how does it feel to be in Harry's attention.

"You're doing this again. Stop worrying and think, that I was made from porcelain. You know I've survived much worse things than hitting my arm."

"But…" Harry locked their finger together and sadly looked up, "It's my fault!"

"Do you think I wasn't aware of what danger we have to deal when I came with you. Stop blaming yourself something that you can't control."

Still gently caressing Harry's cheek, he put his another hand around Harry's waist and pulled him closer. Severus knew there were a lot of people around them, but he really wanted to kiss Harry right now. He lowered his head, but then somebody started shouting Harry's name from the other side of the room.

"Potter! Weasley!"

A middle-aged man was walking in their direction. He was wearing Auror robe too, but there were several badges on his uniform make it perfectly clear that he was a leader. Severus had never seen Harry's boss before, and Harry didn't speak about him at all. Once Severus asked, and Harry's answer was short and straightforward: 'He is an asshole'. The way how the man, Robertson, walked through the room, giving orders and leaving nasty comments here and there made Severus agree with Harry's opinion.

Harry stepped away from Severus, next to Ron and they were waiting for Robertson when said man stopped in front of them, they saluted for him.

"What the hell happened here, Potter?"

Harry hadn't had the slightest idea how Ron and the team ended up in the factory, so he looked despairingly at Ron.

"We've got a warning that somebody noticed illegal magical activities in the building, so we came here immediately, but all we found here was the two Chimaeras and the Devil's Snare."

"Did you check the warning authenticity?"

"No, sir."

"And why not?" shouted Robertson into Ron's face.

"This is a popular place among the criminals, sir. We already caught a thief here once," said Harry immediately, tried to protect Ron.

"You SHUT UP, Potter! I didn't ask you!"

Severus's wand twitched in his hand. Robertson turned around, watched the other people then suddenly turned back.

"The rest of the team was lame enough to end up in the hospital, so you two have to write the reports. What I want to see on my table tomorrow morning."

"But..." tried Harry and Ron in the same time

"How about you two don't start whining and I don't report to the Head of the Department that Potter left his duty and dragged a civil with himself? Don't look at me like that, Potter! I know, you weren't with the team. Reports. On my table. Tomorrow morning. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Sir!"

Robertson took a few steps ahead then he turned to Severus.

"And Snape, I want a report from you too."

"I'm not an Auror!" Severus snapped, he didn't even try to be polite.

"Yes, but you're here, involving yourself in Auror business. If I don't find your report on my table, I'm going to arrest you for blocking an investigation, and I don't care what medal you have at home."

"Asshole!" wasn't Severus the only one who said that after Robertson disapparated.

The caretakers also finished with the work, the two Chimaeras were in their cages, one of them was already waking up, and they managed to block the Devil's Snare. Ron along with Severus and Harry apparated to the St. Mungo for a checkup. Severus let the healer examined him, just to make Harry relax. While he was sitting on a bed and waiting for the other to finished, he noticed that there was a gap between the two curtains and he could see Harry. He was also sitting on the bed without his upper body clothes. Severus' mouth went dry when he saw Harry's well-trained muscular body. Two days ago, that body was in his arms, his fingers dug into that skin, and he was kissing and biting Harry. He never let himself wonder what possibly could have happened if Harry's stomach didn't growl on that day. How far would they have gone? They never did anything like ordinary people used to do. How will be their first time? Rushed? Making out on the table? Back of the storage? Next to the wall? But what was concerned Severus more: Will they ever reach that point?

Severus managed to turn away his gaze before Harry could notice that he was staring at him. All of them got potions for their injuries, and the healers informed them the rest of the team would be alright too. They went to the Ministry to fill in the reports. The building was empty at this late hour; it was already after midnight. None of them talked as they walked in the corridors. After they arrived at Harry's office, a place where Severus had never been before, Ron went to the kitchenette to make coffee for themselves. Severus looked around in the office; there were two tables in the room, and Severus could see there were three more in the other place. The desks were untidy; there were folders, papers and boxes everywhere. The wall had several white square spot, looked like once there were pictures. It was clear that Harry and Ron were packing up all his things to move to another office.

Harry closed the door behind them, and as soon as they were alone, he went to Severus and kissed him.

"Go home, Severus. I'll write your report too," said Harry between kisses.

"Don't be absurd; I can fill out a paper."

"But it's not just like that."

Harry was gently rubbing their nose together; they were looking into each other eyes and smiling fondly. Then Harry kissed Severus nose; it made the man chuckle.

Ron cleared his throat

"Is there a problem Mr Weasley?"

"No, but you two are disgustingly cute together, and I haven't had a good shag in weeks so stop this and let's start writing the reports."

Harry always whined about how he hates filling reports, and Severus always thought Harry only hates them because it reminded him to write essays, what Harry hated the most in school. But after Harry explained to Severus what he has to write in his report, Severus understood why Harry hates this.

It wasn't just writing down what happened and why. It was more complicated. First of all, they had to list all the spells that they had used in the order of the use; then they had to write down where they were, why they went there, what happened, why they used that spell, why they thought it would be good to use? Who injured and why? Who is the responsible for the other teammate's injuries? Who gave orders and why?

The questions were endless, and after ten minutes Severus felt his mind would explode. In the beginning, Severus just listened to Ron and Harry. Ron was telling them how they ended up in the factory building and Harry was writing down every word what Ron was saying. Severus assumed Harry still felt guilty to left his team behind. When Ron finally reached the point where Severus and Harry joined the story Harry also began to work on his own report.

Severus didn't join their conversation. He sat at Harry's table, and he was silently writing his report. Sometimes he looked up just to watch Harry. He was chewing the end on his quill as he usually does when he was thinking. He pulled up one of his legs on the chair, and he sat like a cat. Severus couldn't stop watching Harry, his untidy hair, his vivid green eyes, the curve of his face. It was all perfect for him, and Severus knew he would never love anybody else in his life again. He needed Harry. He wanted him, and he swore to himself that he would do anything that he can to keep Harry as long as it possible in his life.

It was already 5 in the morning when they finally finished their reports. Harry walked over to Severus and took the paper from his hand.

"Severus, what's this?"

"My report."

Ron looked over Harry's shoulder, "Is it in German?" he asked.

"Yes," answered Severus with the evilest smile on his face, "He said I have to write a report, he didn't say in which language I should write it."

It was Ron who laughed first, "Bloody hell, Snape! You're evil! This is hilarious! Sweet Merlin, he will be so mad!"

"You know he can translate this with a simple spell?" asked Harry.

"Oh, thank you for reminding me on this." Severus pointed his wand at the paper, "Now he can't."

Shaking his head and laughing, Harry went to Robertson's office and left the reports on his table.

"One more tea before we go?" he asked when he went back to his office.

"No thanks. I want nothing else just my bed and sleep for a week," Ron said while he was taking on his jacket, "Good night, or morning, or... Whatever. Bye!"

Harry happily waved after his friend until two strong arms hugged him behind.

"Tea?" asked Harry as he leaned into Severus' embrace

"Yes, but not here. Come."

There were already a few workers in the building, but Severus didn't mind who see them together. He knew half of the people were still sleeping so they would think they had a strange dream. When they stepped outside of the Ministry Severus looked around.

"Where are you going to take me, this time?" Harry asked.

"You will see."

Severus wrapped his hands around Harry and apparated them on the top of the Ministry's building.

The city was rather quiet, almost everybody was still asleep, and there were only a few cars on the street. Harry looked around on the roof and turned his head to the cold wind what was coming from the direction of the Thames. Half of the sky was still dark, but from the east side soft light was coming, changing the dark blue into lighter shades. Severus took Harry's hand and guided him to the East side of the building. He waved with his wand and pillows appeared next to the wall. Severus sat down and pulled Harry with himself, who sat between Severus' leg, leaned back and rested his head on Severus' shoulder. A blanket also appeared, and Severus wrapped themselves inside.

"What are we going to do here?" Harry asked as he took one of the mugs what also showed up next to them.

"We are going to watch the sunrise."

"Oh... It's really romantic."

Severus took a sip of his tea and pulled Harry closer.

"Why have you never told me how you team-leader was treating you?"

Harry sighed, "I  usually don't complain, and I didn't want you to think, I'm act childish."

"What's going to happen with the rest of your team after Monday?"

"They are going to work in other parts of the Auror department. After we've got promoted, we talked a lot, and they decided to change the department. I think Robertson doesn't know. He will be surprised to find out he no longer has a team."

Harry put down his mug and snuggled closer to Severus.

"Severus?"

"Yes?"

"I'm truly sorry that I messed up our date," said Harry.

"You're forgiven Harry, but please next time tell me if you have to go to work. I know you don't have a 9 to 5 office job, and I understand, sometimes you have to work on the nights too. I promise you, I won't get mad if you cancel our date because of work, just tell me, and we will find another time to spend together."

"Thank you."

The sun was still hiding under the horizon, but it had already painted the sky in different shades of orange, pink and purple.

Harry sighed again, "We have this unique power inside ourselves. We have wands; we can cast spells, brew potions, and do both amazing and terrifying things with magic. But look at this! I think this is pure magic!"

"Yes, you're right. Nature is the biggest wizard in the World."

They sat in silence and waiting for the first rays of the sun. Under the blanket Harry was playing with Severus' fingers, gently touching and stroking them. When the first ray showed up over the horizon, Harry smiled and squeezed Severus' hand.

"I used to think; sunrise is the proof that I've survived another night," Severus said quietly.

"And what are you think now?"

"Ever since you are a part of my life, I think of it as a new chance. Every new day is a blank new page, and it's up to you how to fill it. You have the chance to start it over, change things or try again, and sunrise is the first sign of the day. It's like, it tells you that now, here is your beautiful fresh new start."

"I've never thought about it like that, but I like it. A chance to make things right again."

There was a long silence, and both of them felt that their avoided topic was in the air. Severus felt the weight on his tongue; it was there. He knew he had to say that little sentences, 'We need to talk' but he couldn't. He sensed, Harry was also tense, Severus could feel it in the way how Harry was breathing and sitting. The rays of the sun were reflecting from London's glass skyscraper as if they were watching not one but many sunrises at the same time. It was painfully beautiful, and Severus couldn't bring himself to ruin something that magnificent with a heavy topic. So he just wrapped his hand around Harry more tightly and snuggled closer.

"Severus?" said Harry quietly.

"Hmm?"

"I've never watched the sunrise before. Thank you for showing this to me. I'm glad I have my first time with you."

Severus locked their fingers together under the blanket and kissed Harry's neck. Severus watched many sunrises but he was all alone, it was his first time too when he could share this with somebody, and he was also happy that person was Harry. They silently watched how the sun was moving upper on the sky making the World wake up. After a while, Severus felt that Harry didn't hold his hand that strong than before. The young Auror fell asleep in his arms, but Severus just smiled. Another first experience.

Harry didn't sleep too much. After five minutes, he started muttering under his nose and moving his head. At first, Severus wasn't sure if he heard correctly when Harry whispered his name but after a few times, it got brighter and louder. Harry was having a nightmare, and Severus was about to wake him up when Harry sat up out of the blue and cried out Severus' name.

"Harry," said Severus his name softly.

Harry suddenly turned around, "Severus," he breathed. He held Severus' cheek in his hands, "Severus, you're here. You're alive."

Severus hugged Harry, "Oh, Harry I didn't know you're still having nightmares of the war. Shh... I'm here, and there's nowhere else I'd rather be. You defeated him. We won that war together, and you saved me, remember? We're safe now."

Harry was clinging on to Severus like he was afraid Severus would vanish if he let him go. Harry's whole body was shaking, and he was silently crying. Severus kept talking until Harry's body stopped shaking and his breathing was normal again. Then Severus made Harry look up at him; he gently held Harry's face in his hand.

"Feeling better?" he asked, as he tenderly stroked Harry's cheek. When Harry nodded, he kissed his nose, "Good. I'll take you home."

"Can we stay here a little longer?" Harry asked, "Just ten more minutes. Please."

Harry was already pulling up the blanket on himself and cuddle into Severus' embrace.

"I like being in your arms," said Harry sleepily when he buried his face in Severus' neck,

"And I like holding you," Severus whispered, but Harry didn't hear that. He was already fast asleep. Ten more minutes wouldn't hurt anybody Severus thought, so he fixed the blanket around Harry and placed a kiss on his temple. Severus leaned back, rested his head against the wall and listen how London was waking up.

The next time when Severus opened his eyes, the sky was covered with heavy rain clouds, and the sun was nowhere to see. The wind carried up the city's busy noises; cars and buses were honking, people were talking on their phones and running somewhere. Severus checked the time; it has already passed noon. He looked down. Harry was still peacefully sleeping in his arms. Severus, with light touches and soft kisses, began to wake up Harry, who was muttering in his sleep.

"Five more minutes," Harry begged.

"I can't give you five more minutes, Harry. We have to get up."

"Why can't we stay in bed all day?"

"You see, this is the problem. We aren't even in a bed," Severus laughed.

"Huh?" Harry sat up and confusingly looked around, "But... What? Why? How? Where is the sun?"

"Are you always this adorably confused whenever you wake up?" Severus kissed Harry's cheek and stood up and pulled Harry up with himself and gave him another kiss. "We have to go. It has already passed noon, and I'm not even sure if it's legal to come up here."

Harry, who was still searching for the sun, just nodded and let himself apparated to home.

Chapter Text

To be honest, Severus didn't sleep too much after he took Harry home. He was waiting for the Aurors to show up and took him to Robertson. Severus knew technically he didn't do anything illegal but writing a report in German and putting a spell on it to be untranslatable wasn't a good idea. But when he heard how Robertson was talking with Harry, and how he treated Severus too, he wanted to take revenge. It was already late evening when he managed to fall asleep, but during the night he woke up three times as if he heard the sound of the apparition, but no Aurors visited him. His Sunday was also quiet. No one came, not even a certain black-haired Auror who wouldn't have minded if he showed up on his doorstep, but Harry didn't come.

Severus knew Harry would be busy in the next few days with moving his things into his new office, meeting with the trainees, and starting the work together. During their Friday dinner, Harry mentioned that the first week would be hectic, and Severus understood that, but he still missed Harry so much.

On Wednesday morning Severus found a tired, worried-looking Harry in front of his shop. He was waiting for Severus, leaned against the wall, holding a brown paper bag, that Severus was sure, contained freshly baked croissants.

After he opened the door and let Harry in, he was immediately wrapped in a trembling embrace. Harry was hugging him like the world could fall apart at any minute. Severus closed the door with his leg and pulled Harry to one of the seats what was near the shop-window for customers who had to wait for their order if the shop was full. Severus sat down and pulled Harry on his lap. He took the paper bag out of Harry's hand and ran his other hand through Harry's hair.

"I'm scared," Harry muttered with shaking lips. Severus automatically put the second shield around his shop and held his wand firmly in his hand.

"What happened? Were you attacked?"

Harry shook his head, "I'm scared to be a trainer," he said and looked up, "I can't do this. I can't!"

Severus pulled Harry closer, kissed his head and gently rubbed his back."

"Harry…" Severus began, tried to calm Harry down, but the younger one cut in.

"What if something will happen to them?"

Severus sighed, "They wanted to be Aurors, I'm sure they understand what risks this job holds."

Harry didn't respond. He bowed down his head and played with the buttons on Severus' coat. Severus somehow knew this problem was more complex than it seemed.

"There's more, am I right? You're not just worried about your new teammates. It's about... It's about Granger, isn't it?"

He was afraid to bring up the topic, considering how Harry acted after he had met Granger.

Harry nodded and kept playing with the buttons. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet and filled with sadness, "If she hadn't come with us for Horcrux hunting she wouldn't have been in that state. It's all my fault."

Suddenly Severus felt the anger rose up in his chest. How can Harry blame himself for something like this? He grabbed Harry's chin and forced him to look at him, "It's not your fault. You hear me! It is not your fault. Say it!"

Harry tried to shake his head, but Severus held him firmly.

"Say it," Severus repeated sharply.

"But It's my fault!" Harry shouted. He wanted to get off Severus' lap, but Severus grabbed his waist and forced him to stay still. Harry went on, "I should have been there to protect her. I should have done something. Anything! It should have been me... They wanted only me. Nobody should have been hurt... I should have been faster, stronger, and brave and - mph."

Severus couldn't listen to Harry any longer. He grabbed his hair and crushed their lips together. Harry was shocked only in a moment, and when Severus licked his lips, he opened his mouth and kissed back with the same intensity. After they broke apart, Harry was panting. Severus leaned forward and touched their forehead together, he placed a little kiss on Harry's nose and slowly stroked the back of his neck.

"Harry, you did everything that you could. You were strong and brave, and you still are. For Merlin's sake, you were only seventeen! You have to forgive for yourself."

"But I can't," Harry whispered, "I feel guilty all the time when I think about her; when I remember the others who died or got hurt. I'm terrified that somebody will be attacked just because they're friends with me."

Harry went back to playing with Severus' coat, who tolerated for a while, then he locked their fingers together and gave an encouragingly squeeze it. Harry let out a shaky sighed. He only noticed that he started to cry when big, hot tears fell on their hands.

"What if I can't protect them?" Harry asked, his voice was barely above a whisper.

"You can't protect everybody even if you want to. If in danger, they're waiting for you to save them, then they're not suitable for being Aurors. But I'm sure if something like happens you can handle it. I was your mentor; I taught you. I know what you're capable of, and Ron will be there with you too, and if it weren't enough, I'm only a Patronus message away."

Harry lifted up his head. The tears were still leaking out of his eyes and rolling down on his cheek, "You would come?" he asked in amazement. Severus smiled fondly and took of Harry's glasses and began to wipe off the tears of his face.

"In a heartbeat, Harry, in a heartbeat. You can call me for anything, not just for missions or when you're in danger, but even when you want to talk, or you don't want to be alone. I told you, I want to be there for you in the hard times too, and I meant it."

Harry slowly lifted his hand, gently stroked Severus' cheek and captured his chin and pulled the man closer to a soft kiss, "Thank you," he whispered.

After a few brilliant kisses, Harry noticed that it was time to go to the Ministry. He left the freshly baked croissant for Severus, and he promised him that he would call him in the evening if they didn't finish too late.

Severus made a large, strong, and the blackest coffee that ever existed in the country for himself and sat down to the kitchen table. While he was tearing his butter croissant into little pieces, he couldn't get shake off the feeling that something important had happened that morning. Harry came to him for reassurance. He would have sitting there for hours if his clock didn't remind him that there was a shop he had to open.

Severus' suspicions that something had changed increased in the following week. Harry called or visited him almost every day, and he talked more about his work, problem and often asked for Severus' opinion. Sometimes their conversations got more serious and the topic from free time activates turned into solving everyday problems. Severus felt the peace was coming back in their life and it filled his heart with happiness.

Harry's worries about his trainees faded away after a few successful mission. It seemed his trainees weren't actually dunderheads, and they were good at following orders. Derek, Jacob and Ewan were good guys, with a good sense of humour and thirst for knowledge. They quickly became friends, but when they were on a mission, they knew Harry was their leader. They respect both Harry and Ron, and never questioned their decisions.

It was true Harry had more free time in the afternoons and the weekends, but his daily routine changed and what Severus missed the most was spending his lunch break with Harry. Sometimes when their days weren't too busy, Harry and his team had coffee breaks in front of Severus' shop, and they had time to talk, but it wasn't the same.

~*~

It was one of those rare days when Harry had a free lunch break, he ran through to the crowded Diagon Alley and cheerfully waved for those he knew. The sign on the shop door already turned to "close", but Harry knew the door was open.

"Severus!" He called the other man happily. He closed the shop door, put his coat on the counter and walked at the back of the shop where the kitchenette was, "You won't believe this! I have a free-"

Harry stopped talking at the moment when he stepped in the kitchenette. Severus was leaning against the kitchen counter, he looked shocked. In one hand he was holding a paper, and Harry immediately recognised the St. Mungo's logo on the top, the other was resting on his neck; exactly the same spot where Nagini had bitten him.

"What happened?" Harry asked, but Severus didn't even move his head. Harry walked to Severus and gently touched his arm.

"Severus, talk to me, please. What's wrong?"

Finally, Severus looked up into Harry's eyes "I failed again..." he whispered, "The Merlin knows how many tries of the bloodlust potion was ineffective again. They had just sent me the result, and it's not working."

Harry slowly exhaled the air what he didn't know he was keeping inside. It was just a letter, not a medical report.

"What if the St. Mungo gets tired of my crazy ideas and terminates the contract?" Severus continued, "What if they make me pay for all the rare and expensive ingredients what we used for my suggestion? I probably should sell my flat to pay it back. I'll end up on the street... Do you think, I can change one of the storages into a bedroom?"

Harry placed his finger on Severus' mouth.

"Don't talk nonsense, please. You made a contract with the researchers; they perfectly know that experimenting and creating new potions means that sometimes you fail. If they didn't want to use the ingredients what you had suggested, they would have told you before. And Sev? Do you really think I would let something like happen to you? If they would make you pay back the money, I'd volunteer to do that for you, but I know you. You would probably say no to my money, but I would never let you sleep on the street or in your shop. I have enough room for you in my house."

Severus put the paper at the counter and grabbed Harry's sweater and pulled him close. He buried his face in Harry's neck and took a deep breath.

"Severus…"

"You always smell so good."

Harry ran his fingers through Severus' hair and smiled at the comment, "You know, there's this little thing that I do every morning. It's called showering, maybe you heard about it."

"Naked in the water with shower gel. Yeah, I heard about it."

Harry felt his face was burning because just one comment was enough to picture Severus in the shower under a spray of water. He shook his head a little; it wasn't the time for sexual fantasies.

"Can I help you somehow?" Harry asked, still stroking Severus' hair.

"Do I really look so desperate that you voluntarily offer your help with potions?"

"To be honest, you looked so lost when I stepped in. You scared me. For a moment I thought they had sent you a health report that you're sick or something."

Harry placed a kiss on Severus' neck where he had his scars.

Severus sighed, "Don't worry. I'm healthy, and you can't get rid of me that easily."

"Good, because I'm planning to spend a long, long time with you. Tell me what I can do for you? I want to help if I can. I know I'm not a potions expert, but I don't know, I can read."

"Sometimes I doubt that."

"Hey!"

"As I recall, two days ago it was you, who tried to pull the restaurant's door when PUSH was written on it with large red letters."

"That doesn't count! You really can't expect of me to think properly when you say such stupid things, like 'sucking the inner thigh muscle helps with headaches'!"

"It's not stupid! Severus protested, "I've read about it."

"You know what? Let's test your so-called scientific theory! Next time when you have a headache call me, and I will suck - "

Harry covered his mouth with his hand, and his face turned impossibly red.

"Yes, Mr Potter?" smirked Severus, "Go on, finish that sentence."

Harry playfully punched Severus' shoulder, "You git! You did it on purpose, didn't you? You, cunning Slytherin!"

Severus laughed out and pulled Harry back in a hug and kissed his cheek. Harry, as usual, rested his head on Severus' shoulder and enjoyed how Severus was playing with his hair.

"Maybe it's time to give up on experimenting," Severus sighed.

Harry squeezed Severus' hand, "Please don't. I know, usually, your second or third try is working, and now you feel that you failed, but it's not true. If there's anybody in this World who can find the solution for illnesses and diseases is you. You're so clever, Severus! You always think so differently than the others, and that makes you so special. And to be honest, you are the only one who has ever put effort into thinking about finding a cure for these kinds of things, like the Wolfsbane potion, and now this. Decreasing the bloodlust; this is a brilliant idea, Sev!"

"Thank you."

Harry kissed Severus' neck, where were his scars from Nagini's bite, then his cheek. A butterfly-light kiss on Severus' lips and one on his nose. "The solution is here," Harry kissed Severus forehead, "and I know you will find it."

Severus tilted his head and studied Harry for a long minute in completely silent.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Harry asked shyly.

"I'm thinking about how can you be the solution because lately, the only thing what's fill my mind is, you." Severus took Harry's hand and lay on his heart, "And this place too."

"Oh..."

Severus leaned forward to kiss Harry but the shop's door opened, and the little bell above the door rang.

"Mr Snape? I'm sorry to disturb you in your lunch break..." said a quite old grandma type voice.

"I'll be back, " Severus whispered and gave a peck on Harry's cheek then stepped out of the kitchen. "Good afternoon, Madam Baxter!"

"Oh, Mr Snape, thank Merlin! I'm really sorry to disturb you, but I'm in a rush, and I won't have time to pick up my order in the afternoon. I hope it's not a big problem if I pick up now?"

The only reason why Severus was able to smile was that Madam Baxter was his constant weekly customer and the old witch had already left a little fortune in Severus' shop.

"It's absolutely not a problem, Madam." Severus picked up one of the brown paper bags from the side table and gave it to the lady, who paid for it and the next moment was already out of the shop. Severus walked back to the kitchenette where he found Harry leaning against the counter and was lost in his thoughts.

"What are you thinking about?" asked Severus as he held Harry's waist and turned themselves around and now Severus was leaning against the counter.

"You will be very pleased to hear, but right now I'm thinking about something smart."

Severus looked up at the ceiling and lifted his hands too, "Finally, Salazar heard my praying! Don't keep me on edge, Mr Potter, and tell me what made the rusty little gears working so hard in your brain."

Harry threw back his head as he laughed. "You," he said, "I'm thinking about you."

"Hm... Definitely better topic than Quidditch."

"Now that you mention Quidditch," Harry leaned back and looked down on Severus, "You would look so good in a Slytherin Quidditch uniform. Maybe, I'll dress you up."

Severus started kissing Harry's neck and lightly biting his skin. He knew now it was something that Harry liked. It wasn't the way how Harry's breathing became faster or the way how he quietly sighed; it was how he reacted. Every time when Severus' lips touched Harry's neck, he immediately tilted his head to make more room for Severus, who of course, took advantage of the opportunity of eating Harry.

There was another thing that Severus had learnt about Harry; his ear was so sensitive. And Severus also suspected Harry had a thing for his voice, but he wasn't sure. One time he whispered Harry's name into his ear and Harry moaned out so loudly that Severus thought he came just because of his voice.

Severus had learnt these two little things after their fight. Something was definitely changing between them. The jokes became filled with sexual hints, the hugs became longer, the touches braver and the kisses more heated. It was getting more difficult to hold themselves back.

"If you want me to dress up in Quidditch uniform," whispered Severus into Harry's ear, making the younger man moaned out, "You should undress me, first. Don't you think?"

And now, just like every other time, Severus knew he was playing with fire. There was a part of him who really wanted to see how Harry looked like when he lost control and wanted to push the younger man to make something utterly Gryffindorish, but his other half wanted to be good, play by the rules and wait for that talk.

The way they started to kiss would make anybody blushed. Harry moaned into Severus' mouth, and with trembling hands, he tried to unbutton his clothes.

They parted for oxygen, and when Severus looked into his eyes, he almost got shy. Harry's brilliant green eyes turned into dark green, filled with lush what Severus had never seen before.

"Close the shop for the rest of the day," said Harry in huskily voice and started a sweet and torturer kiss attack on Severus' neck. After a few unsuccessful tries, Harry gave up to on the buttons and move his hand at another area on Severus' body.

Severus gasped. Now he got what he secretly wanted, he managed to push Harry at the edge of his good manner, and he was losing control. Harry was moving his hand upon Severus' thigh, digging all of his ten fingers into his skin and Severus felt every touch through his trousers. When Harry reached his hips, Severus knew he wouldn't stop. Harry's left hand moved up to Severus pulsing cock and rubbed it. His other hand moved to the button of Severus' trouser, and with a little movement, it was open.

"Ha-Harry," Severus stuttered when he felt that his zipper was pulled down. Harry's two fingers of his right hand had already found the way down to the not so little treasure what was hidden there. His hand was moving too slowly, his kiss was too passionate, and Severus knew that in any minute he would reach the point where he would beg for anything loudly. Severus bit into Harry's left shoulder and...

"Mr Snape?"

Somebody, a man, was in the shop again and was looking for the owner. Harry pulled his hand away like Severus' skin burned him and horrified looked at the door. At first, Severus didn't understand what was happening, why Harry stopped.

"Are you here, Mr Snape?" The man asked again.

Severus cursed himself because he didn't lock the door after Madam Baxter. He took a few deep breaths, but when he spoke his voice wasn't the usually quiet, cold, calm tone, "Yes, just a minute."

Harry stepped away and buried his face in his hands; his ears were scarlet red. Severus flicked his wand to fix his clothes and with a cooling charm vanished his flushed face. When he stepped out of the kitchen, he looked just like his usual self, but it was only a good mask.

"I'm terribly sorry to disturb you on your lunch break, Mr Snape, but I'm quite in a rush," said the man who looked a bit terrified. Severus couldn't bring to self to be polite, he just nodded and went to the table to find the man order. Why was everybody running all the time? Severus found the man's potion, gave it to him, took the money and tried to not glare at the man when he started ranting about how busy was his day.

Finally, the man left, and Severus was alone in the shop again, his arousal was also gone. Severus stepped back to the corridor that led to the kitchenette, but before the room, he stopped and leaned against the wall. It was pathetic, but suddenly he felt shy to go in the there.

"I'm fully dressed," Harry said from the room, "I thought to let you know if this is why you afraid to come in, finding me laying naked on your table."

Severus groaned. Why did Harry need to put such pictures in Severus' mind? He heard the approaching footsteps, then Harry stopped in the door, leaned against the frame, reached out for Severus' hand, and they stood there in silence. Severus pulled Harry out of the kitchen into his arms and hugged him tightly.

"I'm sorry if I crossed a line..."

"You don't have to apologise."

Lately, they were dancing at the edge of that line, and it was a matter of time when one of them would cross it and pull the other one too.

A little bell rang above Harry's head reminded him, there were only five minutes left of his lunch break.

"We hadn't had lunch, I'm sorry," said Harry.

"You're apologising again," said Severus and kissed Harry's, "Thanks for encouraging me with my research."

They said their goodbyes and Harry went to work. Severus stood in the middle of his shop, and he was thinking about how long they were going to play this game. He stepped back to the kitchen, he looked to the spot where they were standing five minutes ago, and he felt his face heated up. Severus turned around to open his shop again. He wasn't that hungry after all.

Chapter Text

The answer of Severus' question had arrived faster than he could think, and not exactly the way he would have planned.

Ewan was one of the youngest trainees in Harry's team. He was energetic and curious; and if he wanted to know something he would ask without any shame. He didn't' know a little question like 'How long have you been together?' what could cause.

It was an ordinary day, nice weather, not too much idiot customers, looked like nothing could go wrong a day like that, then Ewan dropped that question out of the blue.

Harry with his team was standing in Severus shop, spending their afternoon coffee break there. Severus and Harry were utterly lost their little world. They were talking about a play what they saw the night before. Harry's hand was resting on the top of the counter, Severus' hand was resting on Harry's, they were talking, smiling and didn't break the eye contact not even for a second.

Then, Ewan who was suspecting something since their first visit felt he was going mad if he cannot ask about them. He was also a huge fan of romantic stories and the way Severus and Harry looked each other was promising the most beautiful one.

So, on that ordinary day, he dropped the bomb, "How long have you two been together?"

The air froze immediately in the shop. Ron stopped eating his muffin, Derek and Jacob spat their coffee back their cup, Harry and Severus looked up in shock.

While gaping like a fish, Harry tried to come up with a good answer, but all he could say was, "We..." Severus wasn't even trying to answer; it looked like his brain stopped working. He was looking at Ewan like he asked something shockingly inappropriate. Ron who was usually good at saving awkward situations was also helpless.

Then Merlin heard Harry silent pray for a miracle and the door opened.

"Excuse me, but are you open?" asked a woman stepped into the shop. Severus recovered from the shock immediately and went to his new customer.

"Of course, Madam, come in. What can I get you?"

The old lady took out a list of her bag and began to tell Severus what potions recommended her to the doctor.

"Alright guys, let's move. Don't keep Mr Snape any longer," said Ron and pushed the others toward to the door. Surprisingly Derek and Jacob agreed and hurried to the door, Ewan was also following them not really understanding why they had to leave suddenly. Harry was the last one who left the shop. At the door, he looked back because he felt Severus gaze was burning a hole in his back. Their eyes met, and the same question was running in their mind: Are we together?

Ewan's question opened up Severus' eye. That was one thing that they were avoiding the talking topic, but they were spending a lot of time together, and soon there would be more question like this. They can't gape all the time when somebody asks about their relationship status, and there wouldn't be old ladies everywhere to save the situations.

Harry dropped by Severus' shop two days later asking him about their weekend program. He was acting as nothing happened and Severus knew he was doing it on purpose, but this time Severus wouldn't let this slip away.

"So what do you want to do on the weekend?" asked Harry.

"I thought we could cook something together at your place on Saturday afternoon."

Harry stopped playing with the quill on the table when he looked up at Severus he knew Harry fully understood why.

"It's time, isn't it? We can't avoid it anymore," said Harry quietly.

Severus stepped in front of Harry and took his hand.

"No, we can't. But this is what you want too, no?"

Harry turned his head, "Yes, just..."

Severus kissed Harry lightly. "Trust us," he whispered.

Severus knew Harry was scared and nervous; he was too. Although their action clearly says what they were feeling, Severus also felt he need this to move further.

So they agreed on a date, eight o'clock on Saturday. Severus changed his clothes five times. Five bloody times and he still wasn't satisfied with the result. In the end, he realised no matter what he would wear (black shirt with green tie, or green shirt with black tie) he would be still extremely nervous; what was ridiculous because it was him who wanted this talking.

In the end, he chose the black shirt - green tie combo and exactly eight o'clock he knocked on Harry's door.

"Hello," Harry greeted him with a shy smile. He was wearing a white apron with a large written on it: 'Eat, Quidditch, Sleep, Repeat'. Severus rose his eyebrow.

"Just a silly gift from Ron. Come in." Harry stepped aside, and Severus walked in.

"Please tell me I don't have to wear anything like this."

Harry laughed and closed the door, "Don't worry, I have a simple black one too."

There was a moment of silence then Severus remembered he brought something for Harry.

"This is for you," he said and held out something to Harry what was long and wrapped in paper. It looked like a flower, and after Harry blushingly accepted it, indeed was a flower. A rose to be specific. But it wasn't an ordinary one. Severus ordered it from a special magical flower shop. The rose had red petals, but the end of the petals was covered in gold. The end of each green leaves was also covered in another colour, but it was silver.

"Holy shit, Severus. It's beautiful!"

"Language!" said Severus automatically.

"But fuck! Where did you buy it? I've never seen anything like before!"

"I said language, Mister Potter!"

Harry finally looked at Severus, but just because he was taking so formally.

Harry wickedly smiled. "If I swear again will you take points from the Gryffindor?"

"No, but I have some dirty cauldrons in my shop if you want to spend the night scrubbing them," said Severus also smirking.

"Tsk-tsk... It looks like somebody doesn't want to try my freshly made bon-bon tonight."

The smirk on Severus' face froze and slowly disappeared, it made Harry laughed even more.

"Be a good boy and..." As soon as Harry said the words he realised how bad it sounded. He blushed and covered his mouth. Now, the smirk was on Severus' face again. He stepped closer, wrapped his hands around Harry and kissed his cheek.

"I'll behave like a perfect little angel, Mr Potter," he whispered into Harry's ear, then he stepped back because this night he really wanted to behave well.

"Does this flower need water?" asked Harry suddenly.

"No, it's magical. It's... It doesn't need anything just keep it in a glass box."

Besides its beauty and uniqueness, the flower had another ability, but Severus decided he would tell that Harry another time. Harry went to the living room to find a place for the flower. Severus, after he took off his coat, walked into the kitchen, where Harry had already prepared some ingredients. Harry joined him after a minute and gave him a black apron what was luckily free from any nonsense writing.

"So, what are we going to cook?" asked Severus as he was eyeing the ingredients, but he didn't get an answer to his question. Harry was standing near the table back to Severus. He walked to Harry and hugged him from behind. Harry's breathing was fast.

"Close your eyes and take a deep breath," he said, and Harry did that, then Severus whispered, "Just trust us."

Harry nodded and let the warm of Severus calm him down. After Severus kissed his neck, he asked again what they were going to cook. Harry let out a long sigh, "To be honest I have no idea."

"We are going to experimenting together?"

Harry let out a nervous laugh, "Yes, you can call it like that. Here's this recipe about a stuffed chicken breast. I like the idea, but I don't like the stuffing so I thought maybe we could use another one from this recipe," Harry pulled a magazine in front of them, "It looks really delicious, but I think it would be better with potato instead of rice. I'd like to make Duchesse potatoes."

"A what?" asked Severus.

"Duchesse potatoes." Harry opened another magazine and showed a picture to Severus. There were several little golden heaps on a plate. They look delicious, but Severus suspected it wasn't easy to make.

"Are you sure about this dinner, Harry?"

"Yes, but If something goes wrong, we can order a pizza."

"We are not going to eat pizza."

Harry laughed again. Severus wasn't fond of fast foods. He ate pizza once in a year, and this year he already had twice with Harry, so he knew Severus would never eat pizza again in this year. Harry kissed Severus cheek, and they split up the tasks and began to work. An awkward silence filled the room at the beginning but Severus kept asking Harry about his days, and soon Harry was more relaxed, and the atmosphere became more lightly.

After one hour of cooking, laughing and joking around they managed to finish their dinner. Everything looked exactly like in the magazines and surprisingly they also taste amazing. After dinner, they moved to the living room, and the awkward silence came back. Harry reached out for his wine again just to do something with his hands, but Severus grabbed him.

"I think you don't need more wine for tonight."

"I'm sorry," Harry mumbled and let his hand carried away from the glass. Severus knew Harry wasn't planning to get himself drank, he was just nervous, just like Severus.

Moments passed in silent and Severus wish Harry would say something. Anything, but the younger one stayed quiet. Severus reached out for another bon-bon just to do something, but when he grabbed it, Harry caught his hand in the air.

"If I can't drink more wine, you can't eat more chocolates."

"You do realise that this won't affect my judgement?" asked Severus.

"Yes, but you only want to eat chocolate because you have no idea how to start this talking."

Harry took the bon-bon out of Severus's hand.

"Give me back my bon-bon, Harry."

"No!"

Harry lifted his hand up when Severus reached for it. Severus tried to catch Harry's hand for a few times, but he was unsuccessful, then Harry dropped the little chocolate in his mouth, held it between his teeth and grinned at Severus.

Severus smirked. Did Harry really think this would stop Severus for trying? Faster than a predator he jumped on Harry, make him lay down on the sofa, and pressed his mouth to Harry's. Harry, in surprised, bite the bon-bon in half. One landed in Severus' mouth, the other stayed in Harry's, but Severus wasn't satisfied. He pushed his tongue between Harry's lips, searching for his treasure but when Harry started to protect the bon-bon what was already half melted, they ended up in messy, passionate kissing.

It didn't take too much to forget the fight over the sweets and continues the chocolate-taste kissing. Harry's slowly moved down his hand on Severus' back and pulled his shirt out of his trousers. A soft touch on his skin; shiver was running up and down on Severus' spine, and he needed all his strength not to moan into Harry's mouth.

'You need to be good. Play by the rules. Follow your plan. You have to be good.' A little voice was chanting this in Severus' mind. Harry was pulling Severus' shirt upper, and when the cold air hit his back, he finally came back to his sense.

Severus broke the kiss, touched their forehead together, and whispered, "We have to stop this."

"No! Please. I don't want to stop."

Severus tried to push himself back in sitting position, but Harry wrapped his legs around his waist and grabbed his shirt and pulled Severus down, who helplessly fell back on Harry.

"Harry, please…" murmured Severus into Harry's neck.

"There's nobody else just us. I closed the door, locked the Floo, nobody can interrupt us. Only you and me, Severus. You and me. Please. We don't have to stop.

"Yes, we have to."

"Why?"

"Because we have to talk."

There was it. After, three months of avoiding this topic, it was finally out.

Severus felt Harry's grip eased, and he was able to sit up again, but instead of doing it he lay down next to Harry. There was a little chocolate at the edge of Harry's lips that Severus gently kissed away. He linked their fingers together and smiled at Harry.

Harry closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, I shouted with you," said Harry quietly.

Severus wasn't expecting this, and first, he didn't understand what Harry was talking about. "That was a month ago, Harry."

"I know, but I didn't apologise for my behaviour, did I?"

"You didn't want hot chocolate and cake on that day, right? I made a mistake there because you wanted something else."

"Yes," admitted Harry honesty, but he added, "but you didn't make any mistakes. You tried to help me the best you can. It was my fault that I've never talked about this, but... You know it's hard to admit when you're weak."

"You're not weak, Harry."

"Yes, I am. Sometimes I am, just like any other people. Sometimes even the great Harry Potter needs a hug too. I need to hear I'm not alone anymore."

"But you are not alone, Harry. You have friends, and you surely know, I'm here for you."

Harry smiled at Severus and kissed him tenderly, "I know it, but sometimes, when terrible things happened to me, my mind gets twisted, and I feel like I'm still that lonely boy, with broken toys and no friends in the cupboard. When I'm broken, and my demons manage to escape of their prison and they whispering lies in my ears, I'm not strong enough to make them shut up. I should have told you about this. I should have told you that I'm still not recovered from the war fully and maybe I never will. I still have nightmares, I doubt myself a lot of times and I sometimes I have breakdowns."

Severus ran through his hand on Harry's spine, and whispered in his ears, "Tell me what to do next time."

"Just make me talk about what's bothering me. It always helps. Ron usually does this, sometimes he needs to force me, yelling with me, but in the end, I give up the protest and I talk. So just do this, even if you see it's hurting me and I don't want to speak. Even if I cry and beg you. Because if I don't talk, my demons mess up mind, and well you have already seen how it is, "Harry nervously chuckled a little, "That evening when I saw you, half of me was happy that you finally there and the other half was screaming with you, but everything was already chaotic in my head."

Harry paused for a moment, "That day I was in-"

"You don't have to tell me where were you," Severus cut in, "You have every right to do things that don't involve me, and you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"I was in Godric's Hollow."

Severus sighed, "I know," he admitted. When Harry gave him a questioning look, he added, "Ronald sent me a letter. I felt even more terrible after I learnt where were you. To be honest, I also wasn't too mature. I demanded your whereabouts like a jealous lover."

Harry tilted his head, "Were you? Jealous?"

"Yes," said Severus quietly and closed his eyes, "I thought you were ignoring me because you were with somebody else."

Severus felt a light kiss on his lips and opened his eyes again. Harry was looking at him seriously, while he was gently caressing his arm.

"I'm not that type of guy, Severus."

Yes, he knew that now, but back then he was so sure Harry went to... No, Severus shook his head. He didn't need that thought in his mind. Harry moved closer to him, buried his face into Severus' neck, into his favourite spot. Severus smiled into the mop of black hair and hugged Harry tightly.

They lay there in silence, just enjoying the other presence.

Then Harry murmured, "I want you," and Severus froze in the movement. He wanted Harry too, of course, he wanted him, but... But somehow Severus still felt they needed to wait for that, but he couldn't really put in words why he felt like this. Harry sensed something was wrong because he looked up into Severus' eyes.

"I'm not talking about sex, but I wouldn't mind if you have your wicked way with me," he said cheekily, and he winked.

"I'm talking about you. Us. This," Harry gestured with his hand between Severus and himself, "I don't understand why you want this talking. I thought my actions say it loud and clear what I feel, but I think you're a bit like me and there are things that you need to hear. So here it is: I want to be with you. Relationship, boyfriends, lovers, partners. Call it whatever you want, I don't care. I don't care what label we put on it, until if it means you and me are together.

Severus wanted to say something, but his brain was still processing the information.

Then Harry went on, "I know we will fight and shout or drive the other crazy. Merlin knows maybe we will hex each other, but I want that too. I want you to tell me I'm stupid, childish, or a dunderhead when I'm acting like that, and I want to call you a bastard then I want to apologise. I want the sweet make-up sex after every fight. I want to spend my free time with you, go to restaurants or watching movies, exploring cities where we have never been before. I want to make you laugh every day, and I want to be there for you every time when you need me."

Harry reached out for Severus' hand and lifted up to his mouth and kissed it. "I want to kiss you every day, hold your hands in public and proudly tell the world that I belong to you; that we belong together."

Harry sat up and looked down at Severus who was still laying, and his brain was still working on to understand Harry's words. The shadow of sadness appeared in Harry's eyes.

"But I'm scared, Severus. I want to do all those crazy things with you, but in the meantime, I'm terrified that it won't be enough for you. I'm afraid that you want somebody who isn't collecting comic books and can appreciate the beauty of operas. I'm terrified; I won't be enough for you."

Severus also sat up, took Harry's hand in his. "You," he whispered, "I want nobody else but you, with all of your mistakes, crazy hobbies, annoying friends and terrible taste of music. You're everything that I've ever dreamed of. No, you 're actually, more than that, because I've never imagined that I can have something like this."

Severus leaned forward and kissed Harry. He just wanted to confirm what he had said with a kiss, but Harry turned it into a heated one, and Severus had to stop Harry again.

"Why are you stopping me again? You said you want me and we talked... We are together, aren't we? Don't you... Don't you want me?" asked Harry sadly.

Severus cupped Harry's face and made him look into his eyes, "You have no idea how much I want you, Harry Potter. How much I want you to drag to your bedroom and how did you say? Have my wicked way with you. But... You aren't the only one who's scared, Harry," Severus stopped for a moment and looked away. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet and broken "My entire life is a perfect example of how to make bad choices, screw up friendships and losing people. With you, I don't want to make these mistake. Because I want to be with you until my heart stops beating."

Harry took Severus' chin and turned his head back. He wanted to kiss Severus again but didn't want the man to think all he cared about is sex, so he pulled Severus into a tight hug. They sat like that for a long time, neither of them knew what to say. After a while, Harry's breathing became more slowly, and Severus knew he was closed to fall asleep. And he could understand that. After all, it was a tiring and exhausting day.

"I think, it's time for me to go home."

Harry nodded sadly, and when Severus stood up, he pulled his legs up to his chest and hugged them. Severus went out to the hall, took his coat and with a soft click he closed the front door. He took one step forward, but it felt so wrong.

Severus knew the rules, good plans and followed orders made him survive during the two wars. It always helped him to go further and to understand what's happening around him. He always made plans, and he followed its steps. No matter if it was for research, or for a fight or just for a simple weekend. He always made plans, sometimes he even write down the steps, and when he completed a point he ticked it off. The plan for today was easy: Go to Harry, Behave like a Gentleman, Talk with him, Go home.

However, Severus learnt something during these three months. His plans never work with Harry. Never.

Waiting for being intimate felt right, but leaving him here somehow felt terribly wrong. So Severus ticked off the first 3 points on his list and crossed out the last one and turned back.

"Did you left something here?" called out Harry when he heard the door opened again.

"I'm an idiot!" said Severus when he rushed back to the living-room.

"Don't say that!"

Severus put his coat on the couch, sat down and took Harry's hand, "But I am an idiot. I'm not sure I can explain but... I just... Don't you mind if I stay? Just for sleep? I still feel we should wait to be intimate but... The thought of going home feels like a mistake, and I don't want to make a mistake with you. I promised I wouldn't make mistakes! And now it feels wrong. So it's a mistake, isn't it? I know you want more, but can we just mph..."

Harry silenced Severus with a kiss.

"Never do that again! said Harry seriously after they parted, "Babbling doesn't suit you, and of course, you can stay, Severus."

Harry kissed Severus again, "How about, I clean up the mess that we have left in the kitchen, and you go and take a shower?"

Severus silently nodded. His excitement and sturdiness seemed to fade away. The next twenty minutes were spent separately in silence. Severus went to the upstairs, summoned everything that he would need for a staying the night and took a shower. Harry cleaned up the kitchen then he also took a shower and changed into his sleeping clothes. When he went to the bedroom, he found Severus sitting on the right side of his bed, wearing a black T-shirt with a black boxer and he was reading a book what he found on Harry's nightstand. Harry went to the other side of the bed and sat down. Severus put back the book to the nightstand. None of them dared to move, and the silence slowly became unbearable.

Finally, Harry spoke, "We are acting stupid."

"Yes, like virgins on their wedding nights."

Harry laughed out, put his wand under his pillow and reached out for Severus, "Come here."

Not to surprisingly Severus also put his wand under his pillow and he lay down. They were facing each other from their own pillow.

"You don't think I'm old-fashioned because I want to wait?" asked Severus.

"No." Harry smiled and found Severus' hand under the blanket. "You know I thought we would rip off our clothes at the first opportunity and to be honest; I was a bit disappointed when it didn't happen. But then I understood that you wanted more than a good shag, that you wanted to get to know me. The real me. It made me incredibly happy, Severus. So I tried to hold myself back but lately, it was getting a bit difficult. Especially the way you kiss. Just promise me I don't have to wait until our wedding night..."

Severus chuckled, "You don't have to wait that long. I only ask for a little more time; then I promise I'll make it up for you the waiting."

"Just for the record, I have been waiting for you for years."

"Hm... Is that so? Then I'll do my best to fitful my promise."

Severus snuggled closer to Harry, released their locked hands and moved to Harry's waist and slowly pulled him close and the meantime he kissed him deeply. But Harry stopped a kiss and started to giggle

"What?" asked Severus, confused

"I just can't believe you're finally here. In my bed and...You're my boyfriend." answered Harry happily.

"I think I'm a bit old for that title."

"You're not old, and you're my boyfriend so please do shut up!"

"As you wish, Mr Potter!" smirked Severus and went back to that deep kissing what he had to stop. He knew what he was doing right now was a bit of torture for Harry, so Severus slowly broke the kiss. Harry was smiling; his eyes were shining in the dim lights, he looked handsome than ever.

"Severus, I lo-" Harry began, but he didn't finish. He suddenly sat up and starred to the other side of the room. Severus in confused reached up to Harry's back and gently touched it.

"What's wrong?"

Harry turned back; he was still smiling.

"Nothing."

"You wanted to say something. Say it."

Harry shook his head and still smilingly lay back, but not next to Severus; he was half laying on him.

"I changed my mind. I'm going to say this on that night when you're going to show me how is when you're not behaving like a perfect little angel."

Severus laughed and wrapped his hand around Harry's waist, kissed him again. Although Severus wanted to wait, his body didn't want to cooperate, and for Harry, it was hard to ignore Severus' growing and pulsing erection. It also didn't help that his fingers slipped under Harry's t-shirt and they were wandering up and down on Harry's spine.

Harry broke the kiss, he was panting, "I'm trying to be patient, Severus Snape. But if you keep touching me like this, I swear to Merlin, I'm going to tear your clothes and beg for you to take me."

"Apologies," mumbled Severus and Harry decided the best if he let this go. He lay next to Severus, snuggled closed to him and buried his face into Severus' neck.

Harry sighed contently, "And the best thing is that you will be here in the morning."

Severus fixed the blanket around them, and with a wave of his hand he turned off the lights in the room.

"Would you like to start your wandless magic lessons at tomorrow?" he asked as he pulled Harry closer and kissed the top of his head.

"That would be great."

They were laying in the dark, and although both of them were tired, none of them wanted to sleep.

Severus always thought living a life was like being on the road. You choose a path, and you walk on it no matter how hard it is. Of course, sometimes you have a chance to leave that path an take a new one, and there are times when you walk more than one at the same time. Occasionally, your road cross others. This was when you met new people, make friends or got new enemies. Some people would lead you, others would follow, and there are those rare who would walk by your side. They are the rare ones, faithful friends, and honest love. Severus saw himself how his road crossed Harry's more than once in their life. Sometimes they were on the same road just in the different time far away from each other; then they meet again.  Last time, Severus was roughly pushed to the crossroads where he met Harry again, and instead of walking in the different direction they started to walk on the same path at the same time. They were already tiptoeing in front of the start line, both of them afraid to cross it.

Severus held Harry's hand.

"Together," Severus whispered in the dark.

"Together," Harry agreed.

They were on a path called 'Love', and Severus knew soon it would change to 'Lifetime together' and he would happily and confidently step over that line with Harry.