Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“There was a time above, a time before. There were perfect things, diamond absolutes. But things fall, things on earth. And what falls, is fallen.”

-Bruce Wayne, The Batman

The Parisian coroner descended the steps down into the subway station, pleased to see the officers had already cordoned off the area. The head inspector was the one to let him into the crime scene, and he could tell from his tired eyes that the man hadn’t gone home in a while. Once they were on the platform, the coroner was greeted by a grisly blood splatter on the far wall of the station and a stopped train blocking off one of the tracks. He figured he didn’t have to ask but did so anyway, “What is it this time?”

The inspector took a sip of his coffee cup and answered, “What it looks like Jean. Witnesses say that some guy got mugged up on the street. Suspect ran down here where he was caught by…”

He paused, which wasn’t good news for him. He really hoped it wasn’t another one, “Any suspects?”

“Who do you think?” the inspector frowned then gestured towards the edge of the platform, “Do your thing. I have a few more witnesses to speak to. Public place like this in the middle of rush hour? Everyone with a camera on their phones? The whole world saw.”

The coroner nodded and made his way to the crime scene, climbing off the platform and onto the train tracks to see the eviscerated remains of the victim - there was just enough to make out bits of brain, skin, tissue and bone were splattered all along the rails going about twenty feet. He sighed and knew his work was cut out for him. This was the fourth death related to one of Paris’ guardians this month. What the hell did that mean for Paris?

Chapter Text

“Madness as you know is like gravity. All it takes is a little push.”

-The Joker

One Month Before...

It must’ve been chance that woke up Ms. Dupain-Cheng, as she realized just seconds away from sleep that she forgot to turn off the ovens in the bakery downstairs. She hurried out of bed, trying not to stir her husband as she tiptoed downstairs into the bakery. In her half awake state, she barely noticed the lights on in the bakery or the voices coming from beyond the door. 

She only registered it when it was too late, when she heard a loud bang and a sharp pain in her chest.  All her energy drained out of her body and she felt herself falling backwards, her body going limp from and the world growing dark.

“What are you doing?”

“She startled me!”

“Damn it, this was supposed to be easy!”

“What do we do!? I still haven’t opened the register!”

“Grab it and go!”

“What?”

“Grab it and run!”

She could hear hustling footsteps, some leaving out the door which chimed with each person and others coming down the stairs. She opened her eyes through the pain, turning her head to see her daughter coming down the stairs while her husband raced down to check on her. She was happy to see his face, and smiled at him while he pleaded. She couldn’t make out what he was saying, but she knew he could be such a worrywart. With great effort, she put a hand on his chest, “It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay. Everything will be okay.”

It wasn’t okay. Marinette stayed with her mom as she slipped into unconsciousness, riding with her as the ambulance took her to the hospital. She was only separated from her when the nurses and doctors said they’d be taking her to surgery. Her memory started to blur after that - unable to remember whether minutes or hours passed. All she could remember was when the surgeon came back outside to deliver the bad news. The bullet hit her in the stomach - she hadn’t died from blood loss. She’d died from the stomach acid that leaked into her abdominal cavity. 

Devastation. Desperate. Loss. Anger. Rage. Fury. 

At some point, Marinette found herself running out of the hospital. She wasn’t sure when, but it was as Ladybug. She’d transformed. How could this happen? Why did this happen? To her mom of all people? Was this a punishment? Had she done something wrong? 

The Next Morning...

Adrien made his way into class with Nino, happily chatting with his friend and glad to see he would be just on time for once. He took his usual seat at the front with Nino just as the bell rang, relieved to know he’d made it. He also noticed the seat behind him was empty. Their homeroom teacher hadn’t quite arrived yet so he turned to talk to Alya one row behind him, “Marinette running late?”

“Probably,” Alya smiled, “You know how that girl is. It’s no big. I’ve got her notes covered til she shows up.”

She never showed up. During lunch, Alya tried texting her but they got no reply. So the resolved to stop by her family bakery after school was out. Adrien had a modeling gig after school so he offered them a ride if his body guard would let him. He had to plead with the driver to be lenient and let them on, but eventually gave in and drove them to the bakery. But none of them expected to find the door marked off with police tape. 

As soon as the car stopped, they all jumped out to the protests of Adrien’s driver. Alya peered in through the windows, “I don’t see anyone inside. Is that a blood stain?”

“Dude, what happened?” Nino asked, adjusting his glasses to better see the inside the bakery window glass. Adrien felt his heart sink - wondering what had happened and fearing the worst for one of his few friends. While they were busy staring in through the window, Alya proceeded around the back towards the side entrance leading to the apartment above the bakery. Alya has let herself in hundreds of times to visit the Dupain-Cheng’s but none of them were prepared for the blood stain left on the staircase. It looked like a vague outline had been left behind in the blood. And going by the size-

“Oh, what are you doing here?” 

They turned to we Marinette’s dad standing there with a solemn look in his eyes. He was alone and looked lost when not in his baker’s apron. He glanced once inside before asking, “I suppose you’re looking for Mari?”

They nodded and his gaze went down, “Me too. The police are looking too now.”

“M. Dupain, what happened?” Alya asked, voice shaking. He glanced once inside, looking at the stain on the stairs before breaking down into tears. He couldn’t bring himself to say it but the tears and sobs told them enough. They didn’t have to figure it out. Adrien helped the man back onto his feet, “Let’s get you inside.”

He heard his bodyguard grunt aloud, trying to get his attention because of the photoshoot but he didn’t care about that right now. Right now, his only concern was for Marinette and her father. 

Chapter Text

“That’s how it starts. The fever. The rage. The feeling of helplessness that turns good men cruel.”

-Alfred Pennyworth

Marinette sat atop the Parisian rooftop with her knees to her chest, eyes just barely looking over her arms at the street below. As the cars drove by, her mind raced with different thoughts. Should she have gone after the men who did it? Could she have used her powers to save her mom? Not without transforming in front of her parents. But did her secret identity even matter if the people around her were just going to be hurt anyway? The one that lingered the longest was why did she freeze? Why, of all times, was that moment the one where she panicked? Where her mind went blank and all she could do was freeze. Why then was she so helpless?

She was Ladybug! The hero of Paris. And for all her heroics, for all her bravery, the one thing she couldn’t do was anything to help her mom. And now she was gone. What kind of hero was that?

What good was she if she could save all of Paris, protect its people…but not her own mom. Was she even doing enough? She and Chat Noir always did their best to help protect the people of Paris from HawkMoth and the Akumatized. But was that enough? How many other things were she and Chat Noir not acting on?

How many other people besides her mother had suffered? How many more were going to suffer? 

For the first time in a long time, the weight of responsibility as Ladybug felt heavy. She tried to bring herself to move, but couldn’t.

“Marinette?” Tikki asked from beside her, “Are you okay?”

No she wasn’t. Of course she wasn’t okay. Her hands tightened on her knees.

“Marinette…please say something. I’m your friend. I’m here for you and want to help. Please. Please?”

She buried her face into her arms. She wasn’t sure Tikki could do anything to help. Some part of her wondered if Hawkmoth was sending an Akuma her way at that very moment. And if he was, would she even be able to resist it?

She could feel Tikki trying her hardest to hug her, to comfort her and assure her everything would be alright. That this wasn’t the end of the world. But it sure felt like it was. 

A sudden loud scream from below grabbed her attention and she looked up to see a bus speeding its way down the street around cars and pedestrians. A police car was giving chase, but was keeping its distance. She wasn’t sure if it was the guilt over her mother, or the call of others in need that finally snapped her out of her stupor. But people were in trouble and she wasn’t going to stand idly by.

Not this time.

“Marinette!” Tikki said worriedly as she finally stood up. She said the familiar words and leapt into action, “Tikki! Spots on!”

She stopped a carjacking. Or rather a bus jacking. Some guy thought it was a bright idea to take a bus full of people hostage and order the driver to keep moving until his demands were met. But she saved the day.

Like she always should have, leaping in through the window and using her yo-yo to tie the man up before he could get a shot off. Afterwards, the bus stopped and everyone rushed off - leaving the man and Ladybug. As she went to drag the man off, she noticed his face.

The blood rushed to her head with anger and her heart pounded so hard she could hear her own heartbeat in her ears. She could never forget the face of this man. The one who’d run out of the bakery last, turning to look back only once while she knelt at her mom’s side as she died. This man was with the others who robbed her bakery. Before she could do or say anything to him, the police were on board to arrest him themselves. The man cursed loudly as they dragged him off, but she didn’t register any of it. She didn’t even register the police thanking her for saving so many lives. The only she heard was one of the officer’s answer when she asked, “Is it alright if I talk to him alone for a moment?”

“I can’t really let you do that, Ladybug. We have our own procedures to follow in this instance,” the officer answered. She put on her biggest smile, “It’ll be real quick. I promise! I helped save Paris so many times! Can I please get this one teensy little favor?”

The officer scratched his head for a second, obviously contemplating what he should do before nodding and whistling for his colleague’s attention. They stopped short of putting him in the back of a car as he called, “Hang on a second, boys. Ladybug wants to talk to him?”

“Are you serious?”  one asked incredulously. The man looked at her with a great big old grin, “I think she likes me.”

She’d never felt so revolted in her life. After a moment, the officer pulled him back out of the car and dragged him over to her, “Make it quick.”

“I will,” she answered, grabbing him by the collar of his jacket. Before any of the officers could stop her, she jumped up to the roof of the nearest building - a four story apartment complex looking over the street. The cops were shouting after her but anything they had to say was drowned out by the man screaming, “HEY! HEY! LET ME GO! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?”

She didn’t know what she was doing. Right now, all she felt was anger. Rage. At this man she had brought up to roof with her. If it wasn’t for the handcuffs he had on, he’d probably be trying harder to resist her. At least until she realized she was holding him precariously over the roof’s edge by his jacket. The smile was gone from his face, replaced by a look of surprise and fear.

The thought crossed her mind briefly of simply letting go. Letting him fall. But that wouldn’t bring her mom back. It wouldn’t undo what had been done. So why was she still holding him there? The police were still down below, shouting up at her but she couldn’t hear them properly.

“What do you want?” the man finally worked up the courage to ask. What did she want? Why was she doing all this?

She took a moment to calm herself and breathe, trying to think before she did anything she’d regret. After a moment, she asked “Last night, you robbed a bakery. I want to know who helped you.”

“Look, I don’t know anything about a bakery,” he spat out angrily. She felt her grip loosen. Had she been mistaken? Was this the wrong guy? No, it had to be him. She couldn’t ever forget that face, “I know you were there!”

Her grip loosened a little more so that the guy fell backwards a little. He looked over his shoulder at the ground below, then looked back at her with a small grin, “You can’t do it. You’re Ladybug! The hero of Paris. You’d never kill anyone!”

Her grip weakened again. He was right. What was she doing? 

“Besides, take it from me, Ladybug. Fall from this height. Ain’t gonna kill anybody.”

She looked up at him, locking eyes with him for the briefest moment. He could see that mocking smile. That grin on the face that would haunt her forever. The man who took her mom away from her. And the anger came back. So the fall wasn’t going to kill him? 

“Good.”

His eyes widened as she let go. His mouth shot opened as he screamed, falling several stories until he landed on his legs with a sickening crunch. He screamed in agony, legs shattered just below his knees. Her heart was racing again. It was satisfying to watch him fall, to watch him hit the ground like that. She used her yo-yo to grab him by his arm and hoisted him back up - this time dangling him just above the street, “I’m not going to ask again.”

“Okay! Okay!” the man said, holding up a hand to shield himself, “It was supposed to be practice for another job! Rehearsal! I don’t know any of the other guys. None of us did. We all got the same call - we don’t know his name either.”

She let her yo-yo slide a little and the man panicked, “Wait! Okay, look. He gave me a burner phone! You can use that! He’s the only contact!”

He reached into his jacket and produced an old flip phone. She hadn’t seen on.e like that in ages and lifted him back up to take it out of his hand. Once she had it, she lowered him back down to the ground and dropped him off in front of the police. They quickly surrounded him to check on him, one of the officers stopping to look up at her with a look of mortified terror.

She didn’t want to do that. She wished she didn’t need to. But just looking that man in the eye made her so…

And she couldn’t deny there was a certain feeling of satisfaction in seeing him get what he deserved.  He took her mom from her. She took his legs. But all of that lasted for a minute before she realized she was smiling. Why was she smiling? The sinking feeling of mortification hit her like ton of bricks. It snapped her back to her senses just long enough to realize what she’d done. She looked down at the phone in her hands and the guilt washed over her. What was she doing? Had she really done that? Scared and panicked, she used her yo-yo to get as far away from here as she could. What was she doing? What was she becoming?

Chapter Text

“With great power, there must also come great responsibility.”

-Benjamin Parker

When Adrien finally got home, he went to his room and made sure to start playing his music behind him. Plagg finally came out of his hiding spot to ask, “Ditching homework to go look for your friend! I’m glad I’m becoming a bad influence on you!”

“She’s missing, not answering her texts, and her mom just died,” Adrien said as he opened his large window, “I’ve...been there. I get it. And I’m going to make sure she gets home safe. Plagg! Claws o-”

He was interrupted by a notification from his phone, stating breaking news. He opened it to find a new video from local reporter Nadja, “Don’t be bemused. It’s just the news! With me, Nadja Chamack! Surprise and shock as Parisians videos leak online of Ladybug dropping a man off a building earlier today. We warn everyone at home that the following video contains disturbing content.”

Adrien watched in silent horror as the video played, showing Ladybug indeed holding a man against a ledge, before letting him go so that he would fall. There was a sickening crunch as his legs broke on impact and he screamed in agony before being pulled back up to the roof. Nadja went on to add, “The man has been identified as a suspect in a bus jacking earlier today. Police have yet to provide comment but witnesses express a mix of shock and surprise.”

Adrien put the phone away. That couldn’t be right. Maybe it was an illusion by Volpina? Or a trick by Hawkmoth. The Ladybug he knew would never do this. Plagg was there to add his own comment, “Sounds like your friend isn't the only one having a bad day.”

“It can’t be real. I’m going to look for Marinette first. We’ll find Ladybug later! Plagg! Claws out!”

Marinette landed in a quiet alley and transformed back into her normal clothes. She needed a moment to catch her breath and clear her head. What had she done? Had she gone completely insane? It was wrong! It was awful! That was the kind of thing Hawkmoth or Lila would do. Maybe Chloé on a really bad day. But her? What was wrong with her?

And worst, part of her enjoyed it. She enjoyed watching people squirm and suffer. She looked down at the phone again - the only clue she had to finding the others responsible. How could something so small feel so wrong? And right at the same time. She flipped it open and started going through the call logs. All the calls were from the same number. Maybe the contacts? But the only thing there was a single number. Who was on the other end of this number?

“Marinette? Can we talk about what happened?” Tikki asked. Marinette jumped at the sound of her voice, closing the phone but still holding out in front of her. She didn’t want to talk about this. All she wanted was to find the ones responsible. She started walking, “There’s nothing to talk about, Tikki.”

Tikki flew out in front of her and stopped her in her tracks, “You dropped a man off a roof!”

“He lived,” she said dryly, averting her eyes to avoid looking the Kwami in the eyes. But she moved to say in her line to sight anyway, “That’s not the point, Marinette!”

“I saved the people on the bus, right?” She snapped back angrily, feeling her hands shake. The last thing she needed right now was to be berated. To be told off. She didn’t want to hear that right now. But her anger cooled when Tikki‘s eyes sank, “You’re not supposed to use your powers like that!!!”

“He ones where the others were and he wasn’t talking,” she knew she was grasping at straws to justify what she did. Maybe, if she could find the right reason, Tikki would leave her alone. But the little Kwami floater there silently with her big sad eyes full of disappointment. She couldn’t bare to look at her any more and started walking. The little Kwami began, “Marinette...I understand why you’re doing this. I really do.”

Marinette turned on the Kwami, annoyed now, “Oh, you do? Then you also understand how important this is to me.”

Tikki stared at her solemnly, her big eyes fixed on her sadly, “Marinette. You’re a miraculous holder. You have a responsibility to use these powers in-”

Marinette has already heard enough and cut the poor bug off, “Don’t talk to me about responsibility right now Tikki. Please...not right now.”

The Kwami still went on, “You’re hurting, Marinette. I get it.”

Marinette felt something inside her snap, “How would you get it, Tikki? You haven’t lost anyone before!”

The little kwami stared at her silently - the way a parent does when a child has done wrong and they expected the child to figure that out. Marinette averted her gaze again, “I’m sorry.”

Tikki flew right up to her face and hugged her cheek, “Don’t be. Because you’re not the first. And you won’t be the last.”

It was a grim reminder of the fact that she wasn’t the first Ladybug. But Tikki’s voice seemed ready to crack. The little kwami was thousands of years old but hardly ever talked about the past. And now here she was just as ready to cry as Marinette was, “What?”

The little kwami nuzzled her cheek, “Marinette, there’ve been countless ladybugs before. All of them using these powers for what they thought was best. But not all of them got...happy endings. There’ve been so many before you who...turned out wrong. I just don’t want to see that happen to you. I’ve lost enough lady bugs. I don’t want to lose another. Joan was burned at the stake, Mulan committed suicide, Hippolyta was killed by...please Marinette. Don’t do anything that’ll make you be like them.”

There was the guilt again. This time it was for worrying her partner and she hung her head in shame. What was she doing. She put the phone away in her pocket and hugged her little partner, “I’m sorry.”

The two held each other for a long time until she heard a voice overhead. Tikki retreated into her purse and she looked up to see Chat of all people, “Marinette. There you are. Where have you been? Everyone’s worried sick about you!”

Marinette froze, staring at the cat themed hero as her mind raced. So much had happened in so little time that she wasn’t sure what to say. Between everything that happened since last night, where would she even begin? Hey Chat! My mom dad and I threw one of her killers off a roof! It was strange how moments like these brought out a sense of self reflection that wouldn’t be possible otherwise. She must’ve been quiet for a while because Chat went on, “Look, I know about what happened. I’m...I’m sorry.”

No, she should be sorry. Her father was probably worried sick about her. But...how could she see him knowing what she did? Who would she ever be able to tell about what she did? It was all just too much. And for the first time since this mess began, Marinette let the tears roll from her eyes. Chat Noir held her close into a hug, letting her use his shoulder to cry on as she wept. 

Chapter Text

"So many lives lost because I held back. When I should've used all my power."

-Clark Kent, The Superman (Injustice: Gods Among Us)

Fear. Doubt. Guilt. Rage.

Such powerful negative emotions called to Gabriel Agreste like a flame to a moth. And like the proverbial moth, he was drawn by its allure. But this...this was different. Normally he would akumatize them and sick them on Ladybug and Chat Noir. The negative emotions though, were growing. Festering. Like a tumor too early to detect.

But worse was the cause. Loss. Of a mother. A wife. And it reminded him of his own wife sleeping deep beneath the house. It caused a feeling not unfamiliar to Gabriel - empathy. He wouldn't act on these feelings. Not this time. It would be like akumatizing his own son. And he couldn't do that to him. Time would heal this wound, and he would let it pass.

But if a time came when the emotions would be too strong to ignore, then he wouldn't hesitate. A negative emotion too strong for even Ladybug and Chat Noir to conquer. How could he pass that opportunity?

Adrien stood there, letting Marinette cry into his shoulder as Chat Noir. For the first time since he'd known her, she seemed so small, so...fragile. He'd never seen her like this before - maybe frustrated the first time they met after the misunderstanding with Chloe. But this...she was broken. And he had no idea what to say to his friend as she sobbed and sobbed into his shoulder until he could feel the tears start to soak into his clothes.

And he couldn't blame her for it either. He knew exactly where she was coming from - his own mom had simply vanished from his life. He had no idea if she was alive or dead, if she was okay or not. But Marinette did. And it devastated her. All he could think to do right then was try to be a good friend. The one she desperately needed right now.

Once her cries died down, he tilted her head up to look at him and said, "I'm going to take you back to your dad, okay? He's worried about you. So are your friends, Alya and Nino."

She nodded silently and let him carry her in his arms bridal style as he leapt across the Parisian rooftops to her room above the bakery. He escorted her inside through the balcony and guided her downstairs into the living room where Nino and Alya were still talking to her dad. Upon seeing her, Alta was the first one to hug her, "Girl. I'm so sorry."

"Me too," Nino joined the hug. Marinette was quiet, almost in a daze as she stared at her dad coming to hug her, "Marinette. Please don't scare me like that again."

She didn't answer. And it was worrying Adrien. Everything about this was wrong - Marinette was not okay. She was far from it. But what could he do? What could he say? Probably nothing as Chat Noir. But as Adrien Agreste? But that would have to wait. Marinette would be fine for now as long as she had her dad, Alya, and Nino.

Right now, he had to find Ladybug and figure out what the hell happened. He crept his way back to the door but stopped when Marinette finally spoke, "Chat."

"Yes?" he paused to offer her a small smile. She nodded, "Thank you."

"It's nothing. Just doing what heroes do," he winked before stepping out onto the stairs. He stopped at the foot when he saw the hood stain still there. From her mother. The one who was no longer around. He glanced back up the stairs, wondering if he should stick around a little longer but decided against it. He could check on her tomorrow at school. As he continued on, Alya ran out and called after him, "Chat Noir!?"

He looked back and smiled at her, "Hey there Miss Ladyblog."

"Marinette. Thanks for finding her," she said after catching her breath, "Where was she?"

"A few blocks from here. She seemed...lost," he explained quickly to conceal the fact that he was looking for her, "She started crying the moment I found her. I figured whatever happened, she needed to be with her family."

"She really does," Alya nodded, looking back up at the bakery grimly. He took a bow, "Look after her. The last thing she needs right now is to be akumatized. I have to go find m'lady and ask her about what happened!"

He took off quickly before she could say anything else, hoping to avoid an awkward conversation about throwing things off roofs. Unfortunately, he never found Ladybug. After days of looking after school or when he had a free day, it was like she disappeared. He worried about what he would do if she wasn't around when an Akuma attacked. Or worse, what he should do if whatever compelled her to throw a man off a roof led to her akumatization. Hopefully, it wouldn't come to that.

Alya and Nino spent the night, calling their families to let them know where they were and just trying to be there for Marinette and her dad. Marinette wanted to say something to her dad. To Nino. To Alya. Her best friend. But the words just kept getting choked up in the back of her throat. And they could tell she wasn't alright.

Her dad called her off school for a couple of days, which was good because she wasn't sure she could face her classmates at the moment. Alya came over every day after school to visit and drop off her homework, but the pile just kept on growing because Marinette couldn't bring herself to face it either. Most of her time at home was spent lying in bed staring at the phone quietly. It hadn't rung once since she got it. But her mind kept coming back to it - Who was on the other end. Why her? Why did it have to happen to her family!?

Whenever she put the phone away, it was just to go back to sleep. The world could wait now. The world would have to. Ladybug didn't want to come out. Sometimes she wondered if an Akuma would come after her. But one never did. But it didn't bring her relief. In fact, all it did was make her tired.

Whenever she could find the strength to get out of bed, it was usually just to eat or to use the bathroom. But that felt more like a routine than a need. She was barely hungry anymore. All she felt was tired. Tired and guilt for what she had done. And what she had failed to do.

Helping her dad out in the bakery helped to clear her head, but it was just a distraction for her. And even that didn't last long because all it did was remind her of the fact that her mom wasn't around anymore. Still, she had to endure. She tried to endure. The busier she kept, the easier it would be to distract herself from these thoughts. Even talking to customers on busy days seemed to help.

At the end of an exceptionally busy day, she started closing up the bakery when she noticed Master Fu of all people standing across the street - watching her. Her heart began to sink as he gestured with his finger for her to come outside, her throat becoming dry and palms sweating.

Against her better judgment, she went outside to meet him, "Master Fu."

"We need to have a very serious talk, Marinette," he said quietly, turning to lead the way, "We can walk as we talk."

She looked back at the bakery that was still half closed. She didn't want this conversation now but it seemed Master Fu wasn't giving her a choice. Quietly, unsure of herself, Marinette followed obediently while fiddling with her fingers. He didn't say anything for the longest time and that made her mind race in fear. Was he going to take the Miraculous? Punish her? What was he here to do?

"I'm sorry about your mother Marinette," he finally said, "I heard about what happened. I'm truly sorry for your loss."

That couldn't have been the only reason he was her. She was sure of it. And he continued, "But I also know about what you did. The Miraculouses are tools to inspire hope and bring change for the better. What you did was an indulgence for yourself."

He was right. It was. But that man deserved it for what he did to her mother. Surely Master Fu could understand that? She murmured, "It was justice."

"That's not justice, Marinette. That's revenge," Master Fu answered sternly, his eyes hiding the smallest trace of sadness behind their disappointment, "Justice was when you stopped him and let the police have him. Revenge was when you dropped him off a roof. And the Miraculous must never be used for that."

He was right. She knew he was right, "I'm sorry."

"This is a difficult time for you, but that makes it all the more important that you be careful. You mustn't allow yourself to be akumatized like Chloe was. If the holder of the Ladybug Miraculous were to be akumatized…nothing would stop them," Master Fu added quickly. She paused, feeling like a failure and terrible for being reminded of her short comings. The she felt him place a hand on her and squeeze gently, smiling calmly, "We're here for you, if you need us Marinette."

"That's what I've been trying to tell her."

She looked down and saw Tikki poking her head out of her purse, "Tikki?"

Tikki floated up to hug her cheek, before disappearing back down into her purse, "I'm glad you're at least talking now. You've been so quiet for days. I was worried."

"I'm sorry I haven't been myself. I just…can't stop thinking about what happened. It just keeps playing in my mind. Over and over again," she answered sheepishly. Master Fu went on to add, "I understand, Marinette. But there are people who care about you. People who worry. Don't fret so much. And don't forget that they're here for you if you need them."

He paused again before sighing, "However, I think it would be best if you gave the Miraculous to me for the next few days while you deal with your loss."

Marinette's eyes widened, "But Master Fu-"

"No buts Marinette. We can't risk you being akumatized while you possess a Miraculous," Master Fu countered.

"But…I don't think I can do this without Tikki," Marinette added quietly, her eyes shifting back down to the little kwami. The small creature nodded and floated back up to greet Master Fu, "Master, I think I should stay with Marinette for now."

Marinette was surprise to see the kwami take her side, remembering what she said about the other Miraculous holders before her. The old man looked between the two, hesitating for a moment before agreeing, "Okay, I'll trust you two. But if anything happens, I won't hesitate to take the Miraculous. Tikki, take care of Marinette. And Marinette…feel better."

He gave them one last hopeful smile before turning to leave. Marinette felt her smile vanish. Would she feel better? Would this…hurt…ever go away?

Chapter Text

"But I know the rage that drives you. That impossible anger strangling the grief, until the memory of your loved one is just poison in your veins. And one day, you catch yourself wishing the person you loved had never existed so you'd be spared your pain.."

-Ra's Al Ghul (Batman Begins)

Alya scrolled through her blog at the list of questions that had been piling up for a while now. Ever since story broke about how Ladybug stopped a bus jacking and then dropped the criminal responsible off a roof, her blog had been overwhelmed with people asking the same thing: why? And she wished she could answer their questions. She was the girl who'd gotten to personally interview Ladybug more than once, including taking photos of her activities around Paris.

But she couldn't get Ladybug on demand. And Ladybug had practically disappeared afterwards. No one had seen her since. People had sighted Chat Noir, but always without Ladybug. And if he was asked, he could only say that she wasn't answering his calls. All of her journalistic instincts told her to look into it more. But how could she focus on this when her best friend was in need? Especially today? After all, today was her mother's funeral.

"Marinette? It's almost time to go. Please...get ready," her father called from beneath the hatch into her room. She reached for her phone from under the covers to find messages from her friends saying they'd be there soon. She'd been dreading this moment. Today was the day of the funeral. Time seemed to just be passing her by and she hardly noticed. Her father added, "I'll be waiting in the living room. I'll check back on you in a few minutes."

"You really should go Marinette!" Tikki said.

She didn't want to go. She had to. This would be the last time she'd see her mom. Ever. She had to be there. It took a moment for her to find the energy to get out of bed. It took a moment longer to find the will to get some clothes together and head for the shower. All through her shower and getting dressed, she felt nothing but drained. It was only with help from Tikki that she was able to make herself look presentable. Once she joined her father in the living room, she found her friends there waiting: Nino, Alya, Alix, Rose, Juleka, Myléne, and...Adrien?

She was surprised by his presence, but was barely able to get a smile out for them. There was an awkward silence between them as they helped her outside.

The funeral was quiet - only a few family members and close friends. Even though it was supposed to be a sad day, the sky was bright and clear. In movies and TV shows, they usually set funerals as somber against the rain or cloudy skies. But this was a day like any other. Bright, sunny, birds singing in the air playfully. It was like the world was mocking her by being happy on this day of all days. If it weren't for Alya there beside her, she wasn't sure she'd be able to handle it.

Then came the time to see her mom's body one last time before they closed the casket. She seemed so peaceful, so calm. But seeing her brought back memories of her mom's horrible, painful death. Then the gunshot, the loud bang, echoed in her mind. Again and again, followed by memories of her mom laying at the bottom of the stairs. Her heart raced and tears swelled. She couldn't do this. She couldn't be here.

She had to be here. For her dad. To say goodbye to her mom.

It took all she had to keep from running away. If Alya didn't take her hand and squeeze it, she was sure she would've. When the time came to finally bury her mom, she buried herself into Alya's shoulder. It was becoming too much. Her mom was gone now.

After the funeral, all of Marinette's friends accompanied her and her dad back to the bakery. She still couldn't bring herself to talk to them or to say anything to them. Remembering her mom died reminded her that she'd thrown a man off a roof. And she still had his phone in her room. What was she going to do with a phone number?

Her friends spent the afternoon to make sure she was okay, and she could hear them quietly wondering if either of them would be the next Akuma. That thought drowned out anything else they said. Part of her wondered if being Akumatized would make this hurt stop. She still couldn't bring herself to talk to them. In fact, by the time she heard what they were saying, it was because she realized Alya had been hugging her from behind, "Marinette, you know you can talk to us. We're your friends. We're here for you."

It was only now that she realized her Adrien was kneeling in front of her with a hand on her knee. The look he was giving her was pitying. It was ironic. She'd always wanted Adrien's attention and now that she had it, it seemed like it was only because he felt sorry for her. And meeting his gaze hurt. What would he think if he knew what she did?

Her eyes went down again to avoid their gaze. Then she heard music - a happy beat. It was her favorite song. Nino had brought over some speakers and was playing her favorite song on them. He pumped his arm in the air, "Aw yeah. Here we go. You've been so down lately, Mari. Thought you'd need something to cheer you up!"

"What, like a dance party? Hardly the time," Alix answered.

"That's not a bad idea, though," Alya said, approaching the console and starting it up, "How about a round of Ultimate Mecha Strike III?"

She nodded. Alya passed a controller her way and they started playing. At first, she felt nothing - mindlessly pressing the buttons as her character fought on screen. Normally, winning would've come naturally but this time she was out in the first thirty seconds. Alya cheered, "Alright! My win!"

Marinette looked from her cheering friend to the tv and smiled, "Rematch."

"Oh, it's on girl!" Alya said. They played a few more rounds while the boys cheered them on. With each round, Marinette got a little bit more of her confidence back until she was playing on at least even ground with Alya. Alya still beat her but Marinette was at least lasting longer than she normally would. And, for the first time since in a while, she found herself laughing and giggling with her friends. She felt happy, in a way she hadn't felt in a while.

That night, Marinette lay in bed - thinking of the day her friends gave her and quietly wishing it didn't have to end. Even Tikki noticed, "You're smiling again, Marinette."

Was she? She looked at the mirror and hardly noticed a difference. Then again, she was feeling more motivated after the day she had with her friends. Despite the sad beginning. Then her attention turned to the mountain of school work piling up because she couldn't bring herself to do it. The longer she ignored it, the bigger it would get. It wasn't due to laziness but a lack of any motivation to actually do it. Or anything.

But how long could she just sit around feeling sorry? She couldn't do it forever, could she? What would her mom say if she were here? She'd encourage to get up and do it. Maybe now was the time to do just that. She sat at her desk and began her work while Tikki asked, "Marinette? Are you thinking of going back to school?"

"Tomorrow…or maybe the next day," she said quietly, beginning to go through the papers. She noticed Tikki smiling at her fondly, "What?"

"I'm just happy you're not moping in bed any more," Tikki said cheerily, "I'll help! Here! Let's start with this one. I think it says history?"

History…is that all that happened was? History? Something so long ago that she could just forget? Then the fire returned. The bitter resentment.

"Or maybe not."

She noticed Tikki hanging sadly and took a deep breath to calm herself down, putting on her biggest smile, "No, I'm sorry Tikki. Let's get started."

Marinette left early to finally go to school and be on time for once. She felt nervous going back, and the school never seemed so far and so big before now. When she finally arrived at the steps, the sight of it daunted her out of walking through. She'd been coming to school here for years but she felt like a stranger standing outside the school.

"It'll be okay," Tikki said from her purse, "Don't run. I'm right here."

Marinette nodded. She could do this. She was Ladybug, after all. So why couldn't she take that first step. And why were the steps so high? Just as she was about to break out into panicked sweats, she felt a warm hand on her shoulder and a soft voice, "Marinette?"

She jumped, not expecting to encounter Adrien first thing in the morning, "Welcome back."

"Hi," she smiled nervously, now feeling more anxious than she had been before. But the fear that would normally have compelled her to stammer her words and run in a panic instead froze her where she stood. Adrien offered her a calm smile, "Here, let me walk you inside. Everyone's going to be so happy to see you back."

Before she could say anything, Adrien took her hand and pulled her up the stairs and through the school entry way. Her heart started to race as all of her senses focused on the warmth of Adrien's hand, the smoothness of skin, the gentle way he held her hand.

"MARINETTE!"

She broke away from warm thoughts of Adrien's touch to see Alya throwing her arms around her in a big hug, "Welcome back!"

She hugged Alya back, relieved to see her and feeling calm now that she had her there. It only lasted a moment when she saw the rest of her class coming to see her: Nino, Rose, Juleka, Mylène, Max, Ivan, Nathaniel, Kim, and Alix. Even Sabrina and Chloé approached although they kept their distance. Then there was Lila - she was saying something about being sorry and how she could talk to her if she needed to. She wasn't sure exactly what but she could tell it was a front for the others. And whatever it was suddenly got lost in a sea of noise.

They all started talking to her and it made her heart race. Her head spun. There were too many people talking at once. Too much noise. There was too much going on. Breathing started to hurt. She was suffocating. There were too many people. She wanted to go away. She would make them go away. She only snapped out of it when Adrien and Nino pulled her back, "Whoa dudes! Give her space!"

"Come on. I'll walk you to your locker," Alya offered, helping to push her out of the crowd. She was glad she had them. She would've had no idea what she would've done if she stayed there.

Adrien watched Marinette ascend the stairs with Alya to the lockers, wondering aloud, "Do you think she came back too soon?"

"Yeah, bro," Nino adjusted his hat to better glimpse them as they disappeared. She hardly stumbled or tripped as she made her way to her classroom. She was not okay. Marinette had always been…awkward around him. But the way she'd been the last few days…especially now, freezing up in front of the school and now having a panic attack around her own friends. That cemented it in his mind. She was not okay, "Maybe someone should talk to her?"

"I can do it," Lila offered. Adrien wasn't sure she was the best choice - she and Marinette didn't really get along. Having Lila of all people talk to her, especially now, might make it worse. He pocketed his hands, "I was thinking I should."

"Don't waste your time Adrikins," Chloé said, tapping her foot impatiently. That remark took them all of guard and even Sabrina had to call her on it, "Chloé, that was mean."

"It wasn't mean. It's the truth," she stated matter of factly, becoming annoyed at the dirty looks she was getting. She rolled her eyes, "Look. Her mom was killed in front of her. She's not okay. What she should do is get her stuff and head back home. It's for her own good. And before any of you get mad at me, Sabrina and I weren't the ones who smothered her. Maybe you should all think about how you're acting before you get mad at me. Maybe you all should be more considerate! Hmph!"

She crossed her arms and turned to walk away, stopping only to wait for Sabrina to catch up. It was a rare thing for Chloe's snobbish and rude remarks to be so on the nose. There was a still calm among them until Alix grunted, "She's such a brat."

Max adjusted and added, "She's correct, though. Marinette has experienced a traumatic and life changing event. And she's still recovering mentally. We may want to shower her with affection to placate her distress but recovery comes at its own pace. It would be best to give her space until she's ready to be approached by us."

Adrien glanced towards the lockers one last time before sighing and making his way up there. There he found Alya helping Marinette sort out the things she would need for class that day. He did the same, trying to avoid bothering her as he sorted through his own stuff when there was a loud slam behind them. Marinette gasped and jumped, locking up in place as her breathing got heavy. Alya tried talking to her to calm her down while Adrien looked towards the offending noise to see Kim shrugging apologetically, "Sorry."

He'd closed his locker too hard. Adrien could only imagine what must've been racing through her mind. Max was already trying to drag him out of there despite his protests so that he could apologize but it wasn't helping. Adrien finished grabbing his things and gently closed his locker, making sure not to startle her before helping to push Kim out, "Let's go."

"Come on! I said I was sorry!"

The noise echoed inside her head over and over, bringing back the memory of that night. It just seemed to get louder with each shot, the image of her mother lying in a pool of her own blood coming back to her. It only stopped when she felt someone's arms around her and she heard Alya's voice saying, "Marinette! It's okay. It's okay! Everything's okay!"

It took her a moment longer to become aware of her surroundings and she realized she squeezing her locker door so hard that her knuckles were white. As white as the phone she squeezed in anger. She let the locker go and Alya said calmly, "I'm right here. Everyone's safe."

She nodded her understanding, closing her eyes and taking another moment to calm her thoughts, "I'm okay."

"Girl, you're not okay," Alya said, "School hasn't even started yet and you've locked up twice! You should head home!"

"I'm fine!" she insisted, closing her locker slowly, "Let's just get to class."

She was fine. She would be fine.

They made it to class before the bell rang and she noticed right away that everyone seemed to be trying their hardest to pretend she didn't just freak out in the main area. Trying because everyone kept glancing at her, if only briefly. Whether it was out of concern or morbid fascination, she wasn't sure. She wanted to ignore it, but the staring just made her more uncomfortable. It was like trying to ignore a blinding light staring her straight in the face. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe she shouldn't have come. It was obviously too soon and she wasn't well enough to come back.

"It can trace a phone number backwards and find the point of origin of the call!" Max said ecstatically, "It's still in early beta but Markov and I think it's very promising. Of course, the only reason we're researching this is for phone number masking. You know, stop those annoying robocalls that come from one person. After all, you can only do it so much if they can all get traced."

Marinette looked over her shoulder at Max. He could trace phone numbers? She could feel the wheels turning in her head as she gave it a lot of thought. She knew what she wanted to do…but should she? Would she? No, she needed to let it go. And she needed to get after them. Was this right? No, of course not. But what if she did nothing and someone else died? Could she live with that? No! Of course not. She assured herself that this wasn't revenge. This wasn't payback. It was taking action to prevent more death. She was Ladybug. That was what a hero would do.

Chapter Text

"Is it better to be feared or respected? I say, is it too much to ask for both?"

-Anthony 'Tony' Stark, The Iron Man

As soon as school ended, Marinette quietly made her way out. Alya planned to walk her home, worried that her friend wouldn't make the trip home safe by herself. At least she tried to until they found Adrien waiting for them at the school entrance, "Hey Marinette!"

The sound of her name had her jumping again, this time out of surprise that Adrien was calling out to her with a smile. She felt Alya nudge her forward from behind and the boy asked, "I was wondering if you'd like a ride home? You've been jumpy all day so I thought maybe you shouldn't be walking home by yourself."

"That sounds like a good idea, Adrien. I was planning on walking her but I think a ride would do her some good," Alya answered for her, once again pushing Marinette forward. She forced a smile. Normally, Marinette would've jumped this chance but…not like this. She wanted to hurry home as fast as possible. She already had a plan but…no, maybe she should take the ride? When else would a chance like this come up?

She nodded quietly and Adrien smiled, "Okay. My driver's waiting."

There was something about seeing his smile that calmed her, even if she felt a little selfish and guilty. She was practically taking advantage of his kindness like this. That wasn't her. Was it? Right now, she wasn't sure of anything about herself.

She tried to focus on the thought that maybe her mom was happy for her right now. But part of her knew her mom didn't feel anything, even after everything that happened. When they got to his car, his bodyguard was holding the door open for him with usual stern demeanor. He raised an eyebrow upon seeing her and grunted his disapproval. However, Adrien offered his explanation, "My friend just needs a ride home. It's on the way to my next photo shoot so we'll still get there on time in case that's what you're worried about."

The driver looked at her with a grim frown, weighing the wrath of Adrien's father versus doing him a small favor. After what she was sure was a torturous mental battle, he nodded and let her in. Adrien guided her in, silently mouthing a thanks to his driver before closing the door. They rode in silence for the first part of the drive, trying her best to stay calm as Adrien kept shooting looks her way. It seemed like he wanted to tell her something, but wasn't quite sure how to say it.

And the fact he wasn't saying anything made it more awkward. Any other time, she would've wanted to talk to him. But she couldn't bring the words out - her thoughts still racing between her plans for later and her mother. After the longest time, he finally began, "Marinette, I understand what you're going through. I think I get it better than anyone else. My mom…well, she's not around. I'm sure you figured that out. I don't know if she's alive or dead. If she's okay or not. And I'm sorry. For what you're going through."

He paused again. Looking out his car window anxiously before stammering out, "I'm your friend, Marinette. And I want you to know that I'll be here for you if you need to talk."

She remembered he mentioned his mother went missing some time ago. She was so wrapped up in her own mother's passing that she'd forgotten all about how Adrien must've gone through something similar. Was still going through it - because he didn't know what happened to his mother. Was it better to have some hope that his mother could still be alive, or worse because that hope was meaningless if she already was. It was terrible. She wouldn't wish this kind of sadness or despair on anyone. But this wasn't the time to dwell on that. The silence lingered a little longer she tried to think of what to say and in the end she could only manage, "Thank you. For everything."

They stopped at her home and she let herself out quietly, unsure of what else she could've said but happy she got to spend at least a little time with Adrien. But there wasn't time for that now, and she hurried upstairs to her room and made sure to lock the trapdoor behind her. Once she was sure she was alone, she opened up her purse and Tikki flew out, "I know what you're thinking Marinette. Please don't do it. Please. Just don't."

"I have to Tikki. If anything like what happened to me happened to anyone else, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I need to do this," she answered definitively, retrieving the phone from her bedside table he shouting, "Tikki! Spots on!"

As soon as Adrien was done with his photo shoot for the day, he thought to go out and find Ladybug again. No sooner after he transformed and took off running through the Parisian rooftops, he received a message on his staff. From Ladybug. His heart raced as he listened, "Chat. I'm sorry I haven't been around. Meet me at the Eiffel Tower."

Help with what? He adjusted his staff in his hands and used it to pole vault to the next roof, wondering just what his lady had in mind. He knew he would give her a piece of his when he found her. He found her atop the tower, the place where they would usually begin and end their patrols as they protected the city. And he found her with an unfamiliar look he hadn't quite seen on her before, "Hi Chat. It's been a while. How are you?"

"Me? What's going on with you? You dropped a guy off the roof and vanished! What happened? Where were you?"" he answered quickly, realizing he'd never spoken to her like this.

Her expression didn't change, continuing to survey the city solemnly as she answered, "I'm sorry I haven't been keeping in touch Chat. I needed some time alone. But I'm here now."

That didn't really answer his question, "Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head, "It's personal."

"Is that why you dropped a guy off a roof?" he asked, still trying to prod her in the hopes of getting an answer out of her. She didn't answer this time and that just bothered him more. He knew she had her secrets - especially when it came to her identity and information about the Miraculouses. But dropping a man off the roof? The least she could do is talk to him about it, "M'lady, you know you can talk to me if anything's bothering you."

"I'm fine, Chat," she insisted. That was enough for him, "No, you're not! M'lady, you don't show up for days after dropping a guy off the roof, and now that you're back, you won't tell me where you've been or what's going on! We're partners, aren't we? So talk to me! Tell me what's wrong!"

She turned away from him, continuing to look down at the city. She was avoiding looking at him, and that was worrying. Then she asked, "Do you think we do enough to protect the people of Paris?"

That question struck him. After all, she wasn't her usual cheery self, "Well, we are superheroes.. We deevilize Akumas and help the people of Paris on the regular. And we do it all on school nights! Uh, not that we go to school or anything. Not that it's a bad thing. What I'm trying to say is I think we do a lot!"

"But is it enough?" she asked again, putting a lot of emphasis on the last word, "People get robbed all the time in Paris. People get hurt all the time. People die! We're superheroes aren't we? Shouldn't we do more than just fight super villains and help people cross the street?"

"Well, we did catch all the animals after they got out of the zoo that one time. And that time we stopped the run away bus. And then there was that time-," he stopped listing things when her frown persisted. That wasn't the answer he wanted to hear. She repeated, "Is that enough?"

He didn't know how to answer that. He thought it was enough but she didn't seem to think so. What had come over her? She readied her yo-yo and added, "I don't think it is."

"Where are you going?" He asked, worried for his lady and suspecting she was about to engage in another bout of violence. She spun her yo-yo and threw it out towards a nearby building, "To visit a friend."

Adrien swallowed a growing lump in his throat. He couldn't let her go off on her own. Not with the way she was. She might hurt herself. Or, more realistically, someone. He took a few steps back to give himself a running start and leapt into the air after her. They ran from rooftop to rooftop, silhouetted by the setting sun until they reached a familiar apartment block. The home of one of his classmates, Max Kanté. He could see Max through his bedroom window, tinkering on a phone with his robot friend connected to it through a series of cables. Now he was more alarmed - she wasn't thinking of throwing him off a roof too, was she?

Before he could even ask, she leapt off the rooftop and proceeded towards the window, landing with all the grace and skill of a trained acrobat. Unfortunately, their landing was far from quiet as Ladybug tapped on his window and Max leapt our of his chair in a panic. She gestured at him to open the window, something that he hesitated with. Whether it was fear or respect, Adrien wasn't sure. What he was sure of was that Max had never looked at her like that.

"Ladybug? Chat Noir? What're you doing here?" he asked once he finally found the nerve to open the window and let them in. Before she even set her foot on the floor, she produced a cellphone from...where did she keep that? An old flip phone that was bigger than anything either of them owned. She offered it to Max, "I need your help tracing a number on this phone."

"Phone? Tracing? What do you need that for?" He asked curiously.

"I think Paris is in danger and this phone is our only lead on finding out who and why," she answered. Max turned the phone over in his hand, "I'd be happy to help but what kind of danger?"

"I'm not sure yet," Ladybug answered, crossing her arms, "But the sooner we find out, the sooner we can stop it."

"It just so happens that I was working on such a project and this would make an excellent test," he declared, bringing the phone to his computer and connecting the two devices, "Markov! Launch the tracer!"

"Already on it Max!" the bot declared, humming along as the machines worked in tandem, "Hm…interesting. The number is a vine."

"What's a vine?" Adrien leaned in closer to inspect the screen but was unable to make sense of anything flashing across the screen. Just random numbers and lines tracing themselves across the map. The robot answered, "A vine is a masking technique to prevent tracing. Trace this number and it branches to ten other numbers. Trace those numbers and you get more. Whoever is on the other end of this line really doesn't want to be found."

"Where did you get this?" Max asked Ladybug. Once again, she didn't answer the question. She stared at the screen intently before asking, "Can you break the vine and find the source?"

"No, but I can give you the phone's ping history - a list of all the cell towers it connected to and their history," Markov answered, continuing to hum before it stated, "It looks like it spent a lot of time around two different locations: a cell tower in a residential area-"

"Probably where the guy lived," Ladybug said.

"-and a cell tower in the warehouse district."

"That's where we're going," Ladybug said, disconnecting the phone and heading back for the window. Adrien grabbed her hand to stop her, "M'lady, shouldn't we tell the police about this? Or…y'know, bring back up?"

"We're superheroes. We can handle it," she insisted, pulling her hand free. She wasn't listening and he called her name, "Ladybug!"

"WHAT!?" she snapped back. She was angry. She'd been frustrated with him before, but always in a friendly and playful manner. Never angry. And that look he gave her - the same look his dad would give him if he were being disobedient. He steeled himself, "We're not going to drop people off rooftops are we?"

She didn't answer and continued out the window, "If you don't want to come, you don't have to."

He watched her swing off into the darkening Paris. Behind him, Max asked, "What's going on with her? First the roof, now this. Is she okay?"

"I don't know," he answered, "Thanks for your help Max. I'd better go with her before she gets herself hurt."

Chapter Text

"You can't justify murder by masking it with a cause!"

-Steve Rogers, Captain America

Marinette reached the warehouse district just ahead of Chat. She was surprised that he followed her after she snapped at him. She didn't deserve him as a partner or as a friend. She promised herself quietly that she'd apologize once they were done here. She scanned the surroundings for anything amiss but could only see people working to load trucks and transfer cargo around.

Chat stopped beside her, "Ladybug, what are we looking for exactly?"

"Something…anything," she answered, continuing to scan the many cargo holds and warehouses for something amiss. It was getting dark out now, and a few times they had to move to a better vantage with more light. It was made harder by the fact that it was getting darker with every second - until even street lights were coming on. Chat followed her quietly, still humoring her search and keeping his jokes to a minimum. She wasn't sure whether it was avoid drawing her ire or to help her feel better. The fact that he was helping her at all meant so much. He really was a good friend.

So far, nothing really was amiss. Maybe she was wasting her time coming here? Or maybe Master Fu was right - she was indulging in vengeance. No, she wasn't going to do that. She was going to find the people who killed her mother, capture them, and bring them to the police. That wasn't vengeance. That was justice. Between her and Chat Noir, what could go wrong?

KLANG!

"Watch it! We're lucky none of them blew up!"

She and Chat Noir turned their attention towards a group of men busy unloading a cargo hold and transferring its contents onto a truck. One of the crates was on the ground, its lid broken open to reveal a pack of grenades and what looked like bricks of clay. One of the men hurriedly tried to gather the spilled contents and return them into the crate while the other continued yelling, "THIS IS WHY THE BAKERY JOB WENT BAD! IF YOU'D QUIT DROPPING THINGS-"

"Keep it down!" a third man shouted, smacking the shouting man over the back of the head. That sealed it for Marinette, and she felt a twinge of anger. They were talking about their robber of the bakery like it was nothing. She took a moment to cool herself down before commenting, "That's a lot of explosives they've got there."

"Looks like we found our mystery trouble makers," Chat Noir nodded in agreement, "Normally, people use explosives for fireworks at celebrations or light shows."

"I don't think that's what these guys have in mind," Marinette answered, trying to calm her growing anger.

"Okay, let's take them down," Chat said, his staff extending outward as the two of them leapt off the roof towards the group of men. They took a vantage point atop a nearby stack of freight and surveyed the situation more carefully. There were at least seven of them: one in the driver's seat of the truck, another in the driver's seat of a car, two busy unloading the freight, another checking off a check list and the last two were keeping watch to make sure no one came looking.

Chat whispered, "How do you want to do this m'lady?"

She tried to think of this analytically but that was proving almost impossible for her. As she gazed down upon these men, memories of her mother came flooding back into her mind. She tried not to think about it. These men needed to be brought to justice. Capture these men so they could handed over the police. Justice would make things fair. They killed her mom. The only fair judgment was death.

No!

There would be no killing. That wasn't her. That wasn't who she was. She wasn't going to be that person. No matter how appealing it was and no matter how badly she wanted them to suffer. She took a moment to calm herself with a deep breath before reexamining them. It was hard to tell if they were armed, but they were hiding it well if they were. She stated, "Quietly. We stop the drivers first so they can't get away. I'll go for the truck, you take out the car."

He sighed, "That's a relief. I honestly thought you were going to say we kill them. I'm glad that's not the plan. So let's do this!"

He leapt out on to the street below, leaving her there stunned. Is that what he thought she was going to do? She'd only dropped a man off a roof! Sure she'd been upset about it at the time, but she was a long way from killing people. Even if the thought had crossed her mind a few times. Now wasn't the time to get distracted. She had to focus.

She took a few steps back and took a leap down to land on the truck. Both her and Chat Noir's entrance took the men off guard, "What the hell?"

While she landed next to the truck to get a hold of the driver, Chat decided to land on top of the car with his staff dug into the ground. If the car tried to get away, it'd have to back out of the way of the staff first. One of the men pointed out, "It's Ladybug and Chat Noir!"

"Good evening gentlemen! Mind if we paw-ruse your cargo? Just curious about what's inside," Chat Noir opened with, waiting a moment before adding, "What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?"

"Not now, Chat!" Marinette grumbled, using her yo-yo to smash through the window of the truck and pull the driver out. The man screamed as he was pulled through, cut on the shards of broken glass along the window. She hadn't intended to do that, only pull him out of the driver seat before he could try to drive away. And now he was on the ground screaming with shards of broken glass all over him.

She looked up at Chat Noir staring at her with his mouth wide open. He was so surprised, he didn't even notice one of the men running at him with a crowbar, "Well, they say curiosity killed the cat!"

She reacted purely on instinct, pulling on her yo-yo still wrapped around the man in glass and throwing him straight at the new attacker. The two men flew onto another crate, breaking it open to reveal more explosives. Chat Noir's snapped out of his stupor, "More grenades? What are you guys doing with all this? Are you planning on having a blast?"

As soon as he said that, another guy charged at him with a knife out. Just as he got close enough to try and stab him, Chat leapt over him and kicked him straight into the car. The man banged his head against the door, falling unconscious. That was three down with four more to go. And one was trying to get out of the car but couldn't get the unconscious man off the driver's side door. The three remaining men dropped the remaining crates and picked up whatever they had lying around to attack.

That was all the invitation she needed and she leapt into action, using her yoyo to wrap one of the attackers and pull him towards her. All it took was one punch across the jaw and he flew back into another crate. Chat grappled with the other two, throwing one aside and trading blows with the other. In the middle of all that, the driver trapped in the car managed to push the unconscious man off the door and get out. Marinette watched him reach into his coat and retrieve a gun, aiming it at the oblivious Chat.

"No," she gasped.

Her heart raced, pounding so hard that she could hear her heart beat in her ears. Any restraint and self-control she had flew out the window as she flung her yoyo around his hand, pulling it so hard that she heard a definite crack. The gun flew out of his hand as he was pulled her way. She wound up another punch and struck him straight into the ground. She pulled her yoyo free, his hand falling limp and at an angle no hand would have normally. She didn't care for that though. All she cared about was that this man had tried to pull a gun on her friend and partner. And that she wouldn't forgive. Never again.

Never.

Again.

She got down on her knees so that she was straddling the man and punched his stupid, disgusting, worthless, horrible face.

Then again.

And again.

Again.

Again.

Again.

AGAIN!

She hit him so many times and so hard that her knuckles started to hurt. How dare he try to take Chat from her. How dare he think to rob her of someone so important again. Not this time. Not on her watch. She wouldn't let it happen again. She would kill him before she let anyone else die. She would make him know. Make them know. Do not hurt the people she cared about.

"LADYBUG!"

She stopped when Chat grabbed her fist before she could punch him again, snapping her out of her rage. She looked down at the man on the ground - his face so beaten in and swollen that he was unrecognizable. If it wasn't for the steady rise and fall of his chest, she would've assumed he was dead. It was a good thing he wasn't. And it was good that Chat was there to stop her before she did kill him.

She stood up, taking a moment to collect herself and take in her surroundings. Most of the men were on the ground unconscious, two of them were awake and groaning in pain. And Chat. He was just staring at her in wide eyed horror, "Ladybug, what's gotten in to you? Are you crazy!? It's like you were trying to kill that guy!"

She was. And she almost did if Chat hadn't pulled her off. And she was still angry. Angry enough to ignore Chat's horrified expression, and make her way to the first conscious man she could find. She dragged him over to the nearest wall and slammed him against it - throwing him against it so hard that it left an impression on the wall, "Why were you bringing explosives into Paris?"

The man was too busy yelping in pain to answer her. She punched the wall next to him, her fist going straight through the brick, "I'm not asking again!"

The man answered between pained and panicked breaths, "Some guy…he contacts us…paid us to move the shipment in…I don't know why…Said it was for the job…we don't even know…what the job is…none of us do!"

"WHO!?"

"I don't know."

"NAME! HE'S GOT TO HAVE A NAME!"

"I swear! I don't know!"

"Ladybug!" Chat pushed her back. Her grip slipped and the man slid down to the ground, "That's enough! I thought we were just going to catch them for the police!"

"They brought explosives into Paris, Chat!" Marinette scolded, turning back to the man on the ground. His eyes were wide with terror as she dragged him back up onto his feet and pinned him to the ground, "The explosives! Where were they going?"

"Drop off," the man managed, "Other side of the city."

"WHERE!?"

"Stadium!" the man gasped out, "Supposed to take…to stadium. Football stadium! I swear! That's all I know!"

At least she knew where to go next. Maybe someone there would know. But there was one more thing on her mind. There was no way there were this many people in her family's bakery that night, "How many of you are there?"

"I don't know."

She was getting really sick of hearing did he know? Well, maybe there was one thing he would know, "A while ago…there was a bakery…it was robbed. One of the owners was killed. Were you there?"

"What?"

She slammed him against the wall, "Were you there!?"

"Yes! Yes I was there!" the man shouted. He was there. He watched as her mother was killed. She knew he wasn't the one who pulled the trigger. But that didn't make her any less angry. It pissed her off more. She raised her fist, "I'm leaving you for the police. They'll take you in. And you better hope they lock you up forever. Because if I find out you aren't, then you will wish you were locked up forever! Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be watching you!"

He looked at her, wincing in pain as he struggled to breathe. Then he smiled at her. Mockingly. He laughed, "You don't scare me."

All she could was red. Red from anger. She didn't even know she'd punched his face until he was on the ground, screaming in pain as he held his nose. It gushed with blood, dripping down onto the ground as he backed away. Chat Noir dragged her back, "That's enough. We're calling the police as soon as we leave - assuming they're not already on their way. They'll pick you up. Ladybug, we need to talk."

He tried pulling her away but she resisted - preferring to walk without the attempt to hold her hand. This wasn't the time for that. All she could think about now was the stadium.

Chapter Text

"Men are still good. We fight. We kill. We betray one another. But we can rebuild. We can do better. We will. We have to."

-Bruce Wayne, The Batman

Officer Roger Raincomprix stepped out of his car once he arrived on the scene but he wasn't sure his eyes weren't deceiving him. He was coming to answer a call about a fight, so he was mentally prepared to have to break up a small brawl. But this…this wasn't result of a brawl. It was too...vicious was a good word. Horrifying even. One man's face was so beaten in that he was barely recognizable. Another was lying on the ground covered in shards of glass, clutching at his cut flesh and whimpering in pain. One more's nose was broken so badly that it was draining blood out onto the ground. Not dripping, draining - like a faucet left on.

He put the call in for an ambulance before going to check on the victims. Then he saw the gun. And the grenades scattered out of an open crate. He stopped, turning on his light to get a better look at the contents of the crate, then at the explosives everywhere. It was a miracle that whoever did this to them didn't set any off. Especially more miraculous was that any of them were still alive. The one whimpering from the glass was still conscious and he made his way to the man, "Hey!"

The man turned, shaking and eyes wide with terror. Roger lowered the light to get it out of his face and asked, "Who did this?"

The man was silent, eyes fixed on Roger's badge. Then he saw the man's eyes dart up. He followed the man's gaze upwards with his flashlight towards a rooftop. Where Ladybug was perched. As soon as the light was on her, she turned and vanished. He looked back down at the man, stunned and at a loss for words.

There were so many questions. Was Ladybug serving vigilante justice now, going after people smuggling weapons? Had she just gone rogue and violently attacked men transporting military cargo? Whichever it was, this was a level of brutality he hadn't seen before. And if it was, did the Parisian police have the ability to enforce justice on Ladybug?

…

Adrien dragged Ladybug against her will back up to the rooftop. He spun around to face her, trying to maintain his composure while also horrified of the blood dripping from her fist and demanded, "What the hell was that!?"

"We needed to know what they were planning," she answered, arms folded and gaze shifted away, "Now we have a lead."

"You punched that last guy's face in. And then you broke that other guy's nose! I don't think that's all blood coming out of his head!" he practically screamed in a panic, looking back down at their handiwork. Her handiwork. The guys he took out were unconscious and would probably wake up with headaches, but at least they weren't...whatever Ladybug did to the others. One of them was cut up with glass and still groaning in pain, another's face was beaten in so bad that it looked like a blood pulp, and the last's nose was broken and bleeding. This was not the Ladybug he'd fallen in love with. This...this was something else. And she didn't seem the slightest bit bothered by it.

But there was one other thing bothering him, "And what was all that about a bakery!? What was that about?"

"Nothing."

"Ladybug! If this is about Marinette...she's my friend too but you don't see me going around breaking people's noses! This isn't going to help her! What she needs are the people who care for her to be there for her. Not...this. If she were to see this, she'd probably feel guilty that you did all...this...for her!" he tried explaining to her. She seemed unmoved, "Or she'd wish you'd let it go."

Adrien didn't know how to answer that and insisted, "She wouldn't want this!"

"And how would you know that?" she said back, poking him in the chest, "What makes you think you know her so well?"

He didn't like that accusation and he answered, "She's my...friend."

"Oh, your friend?" she responded with air quotes. He pressed on anyway, "What makes you think you know what she wants? I've never seen you two together! Do you even know who she is!?"

That seemed to strike a nerve with her, "Why? Are you stalking her now? I know her better than you ever will! So stop acting like you know anything about her!"

Adrien was stunned. He didn't know what to say that. How could she claim to know anything about his friend? Did he really not know Marinette as well as he thought he did? The more he thought about it, the more he realized he only spent time around her if Nino was spending time with Alya and Marinette just happened to be around. Up until recently, he hadn't really spent any time with her that didn't involve a class project or something related to his father's fashion business. Maybe she was right. Maybe he didn't know her as well as he should've.

No, he did know her. He knew she was crazy into fashion. He knew she had her heart set on becoming a designer like her father. He knew she loved her friends and would do anything for them. He also knew that extended out to complete strangers that she'd happily help without batting an eye. She was a genuinely good person. And he knew she was hurt. Broken in a way that he had never seen before.

His fist tightened, "I may not know her as well as you think you do, but she's still my friend. And she wouldn't want this."

"Don't pretend you know what she'd want," she turned away, moving towards the roof's edge. As she reached for her yo-yo, she added, "I'm going across town to the drop point. Go ahead and do whatever you think your friend would want."

Maybe he would. And what she needed was a friend right now. He leapt off in the other direction, towards Marinette's family bakery. It was getting late now and the last thing she would need was a surprise night visit from Adrien Agreste. But Chat Noir knocking on her window? Weird, but he was a super hero after all. He could happily say he was just checking on her.

It didn't take long to arrive at her family bakery, where he found her dad quietly going about his business in the bakery. He couldn't imagine what was going through his mind after losing his wife - especially since he knew how loss affected his father. Gabriel Agreste had practically shut down after his mom…vanished. But that wasn't who he was here to see.

Where was Marinette? The light was on in her room, a good sign that she was still awake and he leapt over to her window, peering inside. Nothing. It was empty. Maybe he was wrong and he jumped down to the floor below to check the living room and kitchen.

Again nothing. He hadn't seen her in the bakery. Maybe she was in the bathroom? He decided he would wait a while in case she returned and leapt back to the building across the street - being careful to keep an eye on her bedroom window so that he'd see her come back in.

Then he noticed someone inside that he hadn't before - Luka. He was sitting at her desk chair, quietly strumming his guitar. He missed him because of the angle but was relieved to know Luka didn't notice him either. Why was he there? As much as he wanted to know, he couldn't think of a reason to be inside that wouldn't he come off as suspicious - especially since it may give away his secret identity. Chat Noir has no reason to visit Marinette this late at night. And he was sure the last thing she wanted was rumors about secret midnight rendezvous with one of Paris's heroes. Unless...

No that idea was impossible. But it would explain Ladybug's sudden fixation on avenging Marinette's mother. And that realization bothered him. If Marinette had been getting quiet visits from Ladybug, then was it possible that Marinette had asked Ladybug to do this? He didn't like that line of thought and tried to convince himself Marinette was not that kind of person. But now he was unsure.

Marinette arrived at the stadium to find it emptying out for the night. It seemed there had been a game and now crowds of people were making their way out. But why here? There were too many people here! Someone was definitely going to notice that a bunch of weapons were being traded. She used her yo-yo to swing above the crowds, relieved to know everyone was too busy focusing on the game to notice her. As she swung around, she eventually found a loading bay where four men were milling around a van. They didn't seem to be doing anything suspicious. But then why were they here and not at the game? What were they up to? That was reason enough to be suspicious. She had to stop them no matter what it was. She had to stop whatever they were planning before they hurt anyone else. No one else was going to die - no one else would know the pain of loss like she did. She would never allow it.

She wasn't going to wait. She leapt down in front of them, making her presence known before they could react. One of the men pointed her out, "Hey, is that Ladybug?"

"Hey! Ladybug! Can we get an autograph?"

"Play it cool, dude! You're looking like an idiot in front of Ladybug!"

"She's a lot cuter in real life!"

"Dude! You're like forty! For all you know, she's fourteen!"

She didn't quite register what they were saying. It didn't matter. All that mattered was that she stopped them. And hopefully they'd know more than the last guys. She didn't know what she'd do if they didn't. She reached out her yo-yo and spun it in place.

"Whoa! Gonna do a yo-yo trick!?"

"Uh, she doesn't look happy."

"You're being paranoid."

"No yo-yo trick starts with a glare!"

"Calm down! She's a super hero! What's she gonna do? Attac-"

She didn't hear the end of his sentence because threw her yo-yo so hard that it struck him in the head. There was a loud crack as he jaw came off its hinge and he fell backwards. Then she wrapped it around another guy's leg. She pulled it as hard as she could, knocking the guy on his back and dragging him towards her. One swift kick was all it took to send him into another man. The other two were caught off guard and completely unprepared.

The fight was anything but - especially with the power of her miraculous. She was faster. She was stronger. More importantly, she could out fight them. She moved out of the way of their punches and grabs, stepping out of the way of their attacks so that they would tire themselves out before goin back on the offensive.

The next man who's jaw she bashed was getting back up now and charged her. But she countered him by grabbing his arm and bending his arm in the wrong direction. He screamed in pain and Marinette found a certain satisfaction in that. She twisted his arm around so that it dislocated his shoulder too before kicking him into the next man. The guy after them seemed to realize things weren't going their way and tried to run. But she was faster and her one good throw of her yo-yo hit his head. He fell face down on the ground, unconscious.

The last guy desperately tried crawling away on the ground but she stepped on his hand before he could get too far away. He yelped in pain, "AAAH!"

"I know you're waiting on the weapons. They're not coming. Why are there weapons in Paris?" she demanded. He looked up at her with terror in his eyes, "I don't know what you're talking about! What weapons?"

"Wrong answer!" she stepped on his hand so hard that she heard something snap under. He screamed even louder, and she let go of his hand just to watch him cradle it - as if he could mend whatever broke by holding it. She lifted him up into the air and growled, "Who's bringing the weapons into Paris!? What's the plan!?"

His eyes widened in terror, "Please! We were just watching the game! We were heading home! If this is about Francois, I'm sorry about what he said! He's an idiot! And a little socially awkward! Please!"

"Weapons!" she snapped.

"I don't know anything! I swear!" he answered.

"Then why are you parked over here!?" she roared.

"Bernard! Bernard snuck us in! He works security! He gets us in all the time! We'll buy tickets next time! Please! Just stop!" the man begged. His reaction was different. Everything about this was different. This wasn't like the man on the roof or the guys at the warehouse. He genuinely didn't seem to know anything. And it made her so…angry. And before she knew it, her fist was on his face - striking hard enough to draw blood and knock a few teeth out, "YOU'RE LYING! WHAT AREN'T YOU TELLING ME!?"

The man yelped with each hit - each strike - all the while smiling and refusing to answer. She didn't know how many times she'd hit his face. But she knew that all she could see was red.

It only stopped when she heard a gasp from behind her. She expected another fight, but she didn't expect to see a family. Two parents and a child they were hiding behind them. That was enough to snap her out of the red haze that had blinded her and she looked back down at the man before her. His face…if one could still call it that…looked like it had been beaten in. And they had seen her do it - but what if they were telling the truth? What if they weren't involved in that plan? Then she had just attacked a bunch of innocent men.

And now a crowd of people was beginning to gather - some with their phones out to take pictures and record what happened while others were calling the police. Just like when she'd stopped the bus-jacking. But now there was no ambiguity about her actions.

Chat was right. Master Fu was right

She acted too rashly. She'd let her anger and her frustration lead to her make the wrong choice. And after a night like tonight - everyone was going to know. She was so angry - at not knowing what was going on, at herself for being so careless, at these men for what they had done. And at herself for letting it get this far. She shook with an anger she hadn't known in a long time before using her yo-yo to swing away.

She wasn't a bad person. She kept trying to assure herself of that. She was not a monster. She was still good. But then what had she done? There was no way to justify or explain that. Right now, all she wanted was to go home and curl up in bed and just…not be here. What was wrong with her? What was she doing?