Chapter Text
[Chapter opens in the hotel. Lute stands infront of the group.]
Lute: Soo. I have an announcment to make...Well, two actually. Not even Adam knows it.
Katie: What? She didn't tell you anythin'?
Vaggie: But she tells you everything...What happened? Did you guys break up?
Adam: No. We did not. We're not breaking up.
Lute: My good news is...We're going...To Earth!
[Everyone looks at Lute if she's crazy. And they just blink.]
Tom: Uhm...You realize that...We're dead. We can't go to the living world? Only hellborns and fallen angels can?
Lute: Well, Lilith gave us the nod of approval. Here's proof. [She takes out a stamp with Lilith's fave on it as she gives a thumbs up, with the words "Hell Queen approves, don't say no bitch" around it] It's so cool. And she even gave me a temporary Asmodean Crystal to go to Earth, and back down here. It's only temporary, cus she can't exactly jus tgive it to us, it's hers, she got it from Asmodeus as a gift.
Vaggie: Woaaah...I gotta tell Vox. [She runs off happily.]
Lute: Take care Vaggie!
Adam: Honey, are you sure about this? I mean. I haven't been on Earth for...thousands of years! You were never even on Earth, and the others...Well...Huh. They seem happy about it...But im not sure if we'll-
Lute: Im sure we'll enjoy things. You guys need this after the whole battle thing.
[A few minutes later, Vaggie is pulling Vox into the room.]
Vox: What is all of this about?
Lute: Oh fuck, Vox. Yeah. We are going up to the living world. And we even got human disguises. Didn't Vaggie tell you?
Vox: No. All she said was "Vox, come quick", then pulled me out of my room by my arm, she tried my leg, but it didn't work.
Lute: Oh. Well that's okay. Now you know about this, and you are coming with us. And im not gonna be taking no for an answer.
Vox: Alright. I'll go too.
Lute: Yayy!
Adam: Im still not sure...
Lute: It'll be alright Adam, im sure of it. Cheer up. We'll go up there, check out a city, and be out of there like a flash. It will be nice...
Adam: [He sighs, not wanting to say no to the love of his life] Fine. I'll go as well.
Lute: Yay!
Vaggie: When are we going?
Lute: Tomorrow. At 6 in the morning.
Katie: Why the fuck that early?
Lute: Well, i heard humans nowadays have to wake up early.
Katie: Yeah. Especially students. Poor kids and teens.
Lute: Yeah...Anyways. Pack your stuff, we'll be on Earth for a week. So pack your jammies.
Adam: I love when she talks like that.
[The next day, everyone is ready to go.]
Lute: Oooh. I can't believe im using this for the first time! [She uses the crystal to open a portal, and she looks thru it] Woah. Look at all the trees! [She steps through as everyone else follows her] They're so colorful!
Angel Dust: Probably cus it's fall.
Lute: Wow! So pretty!
[Vaggie tries to run off, but Katie picks her up]
Katie: Not going anywhere tiny.
Vaggie: Ah fuck!
Lute: Who taught Vaggie how to cuss?! Nevermind. Let's go check into our hotel rooms. And let's go have somd fuuuun!
[A little while later, Adam puts everyone's bags down]
Katie: Do we have rules?
Lute: Yes. First off. No wandering off from the group. We can go to bars, but only if we stay together. Vox: That's a very good point. [Everyone nodded in agreement and looked at Lute, waiting for any more rules she might have.] Lute: Okay, second rule, everyone stays in human disguises. [She looked at the group, making sure everyone was understanding and agreeing.] We don't want anyone to panic seeing demons walking around. Lute: It's for our own safety and the safety of the living humans around here.
Vaggie: Sooo...Does that mean no killing or causing chaos?
Lute: Exactly. We're just up here for fun, to take a break and have a little vacation. We earned it. We're not here to cause trouble. And if we do. Lilith will NEVER allow us back here. It took me WAY too much time, effort, and convincing mom to let us here.
Katie: And what if someone pisses us off?
Lute: If someone pisses us off, we walk away, okay? We try and deescalate the situation. We're gonna be in human disguises. So, you gotta act like it, okay?
Katie: Alright fineee...But what if-
Adam: We are NOT killing anyone.
Vaggie: Damn it...
Lute: And the last rule, this is THE most important rule...no getting super drunk. We don't wanna get a hangover while we're up here. And that gors mostly to you Tom.
Tom: Hey!...Fair enough...
Adam: That rule will be broken eventually. You know, especially Tom and Angel.
Lute: Yeah, you're right...But...Just pleaseee. Guys. DON'T break the rules!
Tom: No promises. But fine.
Vox: They're gonna get so drunk. I can already see it.
Lute: We can take care of them! I know it! They'll behave!
Vox: Great!
Adam: You'll be the babysitter.
Vox: Excuse me?
Adam: You heard me.
Lute: Let's go eat now. We can order pizza.
Vaggie: I want some!
Angel Dust: Hell yeah!
Vaggie: I want pineapple pizza!
Angel Dust: You're no longer my friend.
Vaggie: Why not?
Katie: You don't say pineapple pizza infront of an italian.
Vaggie: Oh...
Lute: I'll go get everyone their pizza. It won't be too long. Adam, come on.
Adam: I'll be there in a minute. Wish i was allowed to bring my harpoon here.
Lute: But you can't, all you can have right now is a pocket knife. [She hands Adam his brand new, shiny golden cased pocket knife!]
Adam: Thanks baby.
[Lute walks out of the room and into the lobby. She sits down on a couch in the lobby as she waits for Adam, and a man sits down next to her]
Lute: Oh, hello sir!
Man: Hello doll.
Lute: I don't like being called that...
Man: Why not? Are you shy?
Lute: No. I just don't like being called that. Makes me feel weird-
Man: I can make that feeling go away.
[The man slowly reacher to touch her boob, but a hand grabs him by the face.]
Vox: I advise you stay away from her. If you value your life.
Man: And who are you? Her boyfriend?
Adam: No. But i am! [He takes out his knife.]
[Vox drops the Man as he runs off after seeing the knife]
Lute: Thanks guys...But how did you know?
[Adam points at the cameras.]
Lute: oooh...Right...Vox and cameras. Ookay...I remember now.
Adam: Now let's go get those bitches those pizzas they want.
Lute: Yeah! Vox. Come along as well. We might need a thrid to carry those boxes. Haha.
Vox: Alright.
Adam: A question, sweetie. Who's gonna watch over the others?
Lute: Oh...Shit. I didn't think that through. [A few seconds of intense thinking.] Oh. I know! The most responsible of those guys is most likely Katie and Tom right now. We could ask them to watch over the others.
Adam: Seriously? Tom and Katie? The depresso espresso duo?
Lute: Worth a shot.
[The three walk out of the hotel, and out into the city streets...yayyy...]
Lute: [She waves to people around] Hello ma'am! Good afternoon sir!
Adam: Lute. You don't have to say hi or hello to everyone.
Lute: But you know i love to do that!
[Adam and Vox roll their eyes at Lute's overly friendly behaviour and waves to strangers.]
Vox: You're gonna end up talking to someone sketchy again, dear.
Lute: Oh hush it, Vox, i can handle it!
Adam: Reminder that a man literally tried to touch you in a not apropriate way.
Lute: I know but...Nevermind.
Adam: I swear, when she gets overly friendly, she always attracts attention from the wrong people.
Vox: Exactly, dear first man. This might be like that dude she was just talking to in the lobby. Seemed real friendly than turned out to be a freak.
Adam: Yes...But Lute's too innocent to see when people have ill intentions. She sees the good in others.
[Vox shakes his head in agreement. Which is rare, considering he's talking to Adam.]
Vox: Seriously. One of these days, someone is gonna take advantage of her good-naturedness. Especially now that we're on Earth.
Lute: I wonder how the others are doing?
[Cut back to the hoteeeeelll (cliché cutaway timmeeee).]
[Tom, Katie, and Angel are sprawled out on the floor, watching a horror movie.]
Tom: This is boring.
Katie: You were literally just saying how much you missed scary movies.
Tom: I changed my mind.
Angel Dust: Oh shush. You two love watching those damn horror movies.
[Vaggie runs around the hotel trying to steal the brooms, and cleaning suplies from the staff as the hotel staff are frantically trying to stop Vaggie from stealing their cleaning supplies.]
Broom Guy: Miss! You can't take those!
Vaggie: Watch me!
Tom: [He sighs and stands up. And walks away and catches Vaggie as she runs.] Not so fast tiny.
[Katie laughs at the sight of Tom catching Vaggie.]
Vaggie: Let me go! I want those cleaning supplies!
Tom: What're you gonna do with them? Mop some floors?
Vaggie: Yeah!
[Tom rolls his eyes and looks at Katie.]
Tom: Is she really that serious?
Katie: You know how extra she gets. She wants the floors and windows of any place we are at to be sparkling clean for some reason. I don't know why.
Angel Dust: Only Vox knows, probably.
[Tom looks at Vaggie like she's lost her mind.]
Tom: You realize we're only here for a week, right?
Vaggie: I don't care! Those floors need to be spotless before those three come back!
Tom: They don't have to be.
[Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. Angel groans and gets up to answer.]
Angel Dust: Who is it?
[Katie perks up from their movie.]
Tom: Who the hell could that be? Lute, Adam and Vox aren't back yet.
[Angel opens the door and sees the hotel manager.]
Hotel Manager: Hi, there's been complaints of a woman stealing from housekeeping. Did you people happen to see her come through here?
Tom: [He hides Vaggie behind his back.] No. Why do you ask?
Hotel Manager: [He notices Vaggie.) I knew it. Ma'am, I can see you behind his back. I'm gonna need you to step forward.
Tom: Oh Vox is not NOT be overjoyed when he hears this.
Katie: Angel, Mouthgag.
Hotel Manager: What?
[Back to Lute and the other two men that protect her.]
Lute: Pizza! [She excitedly rushes into the place as the patrons there look at her in shock, cus all they see is a 20 something year old woman just bursting into the place all happy.]
Lute: Hi! Hello! [She walks to the counter] Hi. I wanna order uh...[She starts counting on her fingers] 1...2...3...4...Uh...Katie...Me...Tom...Angel...Vaggie...Vox...
Adam: 6 pizzas. I want ribs. I don't want pizzas.
Lute: Okay. 6 pizzas then! [She smiles happily]
Worker: Uh...There's a line...
Lute: Oh shit! Im so sorry!
[A little while later after waiting]
Lute: Alright. So. 6 pizzas. One of each of these; Hawaii, Italian, Double Cheesed crusted pizzas. And 2 pepperoni pizzas. Vox, what do you want?
Vox: Breakfast pizza.
Worker: It's 1 in the afternoon. We don't serve breakfast foods after 9 o'clock. (Im so sorry, im basing time from MY timezone, i don't know alot of them.)
Vox: I said. I. Want. Breakfast. Pizza.
[The worker, scared, nods at Vox and rushes to the kitchen.]
Vox: Cool.
Adam: Im gonna get my ribs.
Lute: Take care sweetie!
[About an hour later, of boring waiting, they finally get their pizzas (I used the word pizza so many times. Im gonna find some other verbs for it.) And Adam waits for them outside with 2 small boxes of Ribs.]
Adam: Hi guys. [He eats a rib like buzzsaw, classic Adam) as he smiles at Lute.]
Lute: Heya. [She gives 3 boxes to Vox. As the they walk back to the hotel they are staying at.]
[Inside of their room, Tom breaks a few cameras and Katie deletes the videos.]
Katie: There. Done and done. Vaggie no! You don't kill anyone!
Vaggie: Aw maaannn...[She releases the knife she was holding at the manager.]
Tom: Now let the guy go. He'll just think he's dreaming. [Points at the manager, who Angel mouthgagged and accidentally hit him on the head.]
Angel Dust: Fine, i'll let him go.
[Just as Angel walks out with the body, the three appear holding the boxes]
Lute: We're baaaaaccckkk!..What's with the cameras?
Tom: They broke.
Adam: Uh-huh. Im not believing you.
Lute: Anywaysss. Let's eat! [She and Vox puts the boxes down to the table.]
Vaggie: Yayy! Lunch!
[Chapter ends here.]