Chapter Text
Freak. The word echoed in Drew's mind like a mantra.
The sky was an ombre—orange bleeding into purple—with rays of sunlight entering the halls of RoseMeadow High School through the windows. Each step he took echoed within the empty halls, a silent reminder of what shouldn't have been.
Drew told himself that it was nothing. That the word meant nothing to him. To Jake.
The boy buried his hands in the pockets of his jacket just to pick on his skin without disruption—well, that was stupid. No one was around, who was there to judge?
But, god, no one knew better than Drew that those thoughts were bullshit.
So why did he call him that? Did he start considering Jake as one of those music freaks now, too?
He fucked up. Of course, he knew that—
Drew bumped into someone. The contact bristled his thoughts just slightly, but enough to bring him out of them.
He didn't look up—didn't bother to. "Sorry," he muttered, eyes downcast and unwilling to look anyone in the eye. He continued to walk—maybe to go up the rooftop, maybe to go home.
Actually, he didn't want to go home. Not yet. Not when his thoughts were all jumbled up, and anyone talking to him for more than just a second seemed to make him zone out.
Maybe he just kept on zoning out on his own. His senses were all messed up, his vision blurring like water over his glasses—no, like guilt on repeat—
A hand found its way around Drew's wrist. When did that happen? Just now? "Drew? Are you even listening?" Who—
Drew looked up—his magenta eyes too tired to look mad—and was met with a familiar shade of pink. Why was Milly here? Didn't he tell her not to talk to him in public?
She looked mad. At him, probably. Lately, everyone's had their rounds at shouting at him. The pink-haired devil sighed, "Look, I know you don't want people to know we're cousins, but just listen to me."
"Don't say it aloud," Drew wanted to say—yet such words didn't come to him. They were stuck in his throat, as though scolding her would hurt more than calling his friend a freak.
Milly tugged at his arm—watching him zone out, bags under his eyes darker than Sadie's hair. It was all too unnerving to her. With another sigh—she's been doing that a lot 'cause of him lately—she dragged him with her when she realized he was too out of it to listen to what she had to say.
"You look like shit," the girl sighed, worry seeping into her otherwise flippant tone despite her efforts to conceal it. "Anyone told you that yet?"
A shallow laugh—though Drew meant to scoff—escaped his lips. It seemed he finally snapped out of his thoughts. "Too many times," he muttered, the corners of his lips curving into a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.
"Where to?" Drew asked.
Not asking why, but when—because it didn't matter. Drew trusted Milly enough not to be paranoid around her. It always ended in bickering, after all.
Milly, who was leading the way outside of school, looked back at him, "Wanna go home?"
Drew shook his head—it was small, a little action anyone wouldn't have caught, but Milly understood.
"Figures," she muttered.
Absentmindedly, the boy lifted his gaze from the floor to the girl who was pulling him by the wrist—her grip firm, unrelenting, but not cruel. Never.
He didn't deserve such kindness. Not when he bullied her in front of others.
Why did she tolerate his behavior, anyway? She always called him a stuck-up asshole in front of her friends. Does she really think of him like that?
Drew stopped in his tracks, arm twitching in her hold and feet suddenly stuck to the ground.
Realizing he had stopped walking, Milly glanced at him, eyebrows furrowing in something deeper than irritation. "Hey, why'd you stop—"
She couldn't continue. Seeing the look on his face, scrunched up and tears welling in his eyes—it was all too vulnerable. Her hand, once wrapped around his wrist, dropped to her sides.
"...Sorry," his own voice surprised him—it was weak. So much weaker than he allowed himself to be. Drew faced the ground and stared at his feet as if they had wronged him in his past life—looking at anything else except Milly.
The pink-haired girl didn't speak. Not immediately.
Don't—stop. Don't look at me like that. Don't look at me like I matter to you.
Silence engulfed the already empty halls, and all Drew was focusing on was the way their shadows grew longer with each passing minute.
"What for?" She drifted her gaze, unwilling to look him in the eye. It was too... unsettling. To see him so upset. He was only ever like this whenever his parents were around.
The tears in Drew's eyes just kept on welling—like water on a dam that was on the verge of breaking. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, feeling the wetness of his tears on his hand...
It wasn't an unpleasant feeling. Honestly, it felt like shit to cry in front of someone you've been an asshole to your whole life—but it was the only thing that kept him aware. The only thing that made sure he wasn't floating in his head.
"For everything. For—fuck," he caught his breath, stumbling on his own words and stuttering like it was too much effort to force the apology lodged in his throat.
Drew turned his head away, covering his trembling lips with his hand—as if that did anything to hide his weakness.
"For calling you a freak. For bullying your stupid—your friends and calling them talentless. You all are fucking good at music and I'm—sorry, okay? Just—just... stop looking at me like that," like I'm an alien, is what he left unsaid.
Truth be told, Drew never apologized to anyone. Not to his friends, not to Jake, not to Zoey, and especially not to the victims of his bullying.
And, god, the weight of his words—too cruel to be humane—was starting to hit him like a truck.
And Milly? Milly—she simply stared at him. Too astonished to speak, like it was rocket science to comprehend his words. Was he that much of an asshole that an apology from him was like a different language to others?
Why won't she speak? Did she finally realize how mad she should be at me? Why did she go quiet?
Milly sighed—an action that made Drew's skin crawl—as she leaned closer to him.
"You're stupid," the pink-haired girl spoke, voice breathless as if her lungs were betraying her.
Drew's eyes widened. In fear or shock, he didn't know.
"W-What?" He faced Milly, only to be faced with a shit-eating grin. It almost felt comical—how different their expressions looked in comparison. One smiling, one nearly crying.
Maybe he was stupid. If this was her way of taking her anger out on him, he didn't mind.
It stung, but not enough to make him cry. Never—because he didn't deserve to. Not when he's hurt too many people to count. He couldn't just ignore that part of his life. That part of him—
A flick to his forehead made him snap out of his thoughts.
Drew yelped, flinching back as his hands shot up to massage the stinging spot. His eyebrows furrowed as he glared at Milly, "What the hell was that for?"
"So, so stupid," she shook her head—and suddenly it felt as if all the kindness he thought she had dissipated, or at least he thought so. "You're stupid if you think I haven't already forgiven you."
"...What? Hey—"
Milly grabbed him by the wrist again, dragging him along as she talked, "It's good that your head's out of your ass now, enough for you to apologize."
"Excuse me?" Drew scoffed, the tears in his eyes now gone as a slight smile replaced his distressed expression.
He'd never admit it, but he found more comfort in their banter rather than talking about his feelings aloud. Something was soothing about hiding his feelings in insults, apparently.
"You shouldn't be apologizing to me. Save that for when you encounter the music club again—no, for when you meet Jake again." The mention of his name made Drew flinch—what the hell?
Milly glanced back at him, expression more relaxed than before, "Look, what I'm saying is that I get it. You don't gotta spill your guts out for me to understand, because we both know I'd hate to clean up the mess."
For once, Drew was grateful he didn't push her away. If it were anyone else, it would've ended in more than hurtful words and insults he didn't mean.
For once, Drew was glad someone stayed.