Chapter Text
Of all the people in this world, Yoo Joonghyuk was the last person Han Sooyoung wanted to be seen in public with. Not because of any possible scandal or gossip that could arise from the situation, but purely because she liked him about as much as she liked picking gum off the bottom of her shoe.
"You know you want to," said Han Sooyoung.
“I don’t.” Yoo Joonghyuk made a show of checking the time on his phone like the asshole with the personality of mouldy gum he was. “You have five minutes.”
“Why are you in such a rush? If I recall correctly, aren't you currently unemployed?” she asked, idly stirring her iced latte with her straw. The ice in her glass was already half-melted from the thirty minute wait she had endured before he finally graced her with his presence. “Come on, I’ll even buy you a coffee. What kind do you want? A flat white? Americano?”
Yoo Joonghyuk’s reply was muffled by the black face mask covering half his face. “I don’t drink coffee.”
Han Sooyoung’s cheeks were starting to ache from the force of holding up her smile, and she pinched her leg under the table to keep herself going. “Life is all about meeting new people and reconnecting with others, Yoo Joonghyuk-ssi,” she said in a saccharine voice. “And love, don’t forget that. To love and to be loved is a crucial part of one’s journey on this mortal plane. Say, don’t you ever get tired of the bachelor lifestyle? Don’t you want to meet the love of your life, the light of your heart, the fruit of your loins—”
"I'm not going on your show, stop asking. You have four minutes left."
"Why not?" Han Sooyoung demanded. "It's not like I'm asking you to sell your body for views. Just think of it as a month-long vacation! You get to live in a beautiful mansion for a month free of charge, and I'll even throw in an all expenses paid trip to Jeju Island." Yoo Joonghyuk narrowed his eyes. "Meanwhile, I'll get a teeny-tiny boost in viewership from your fans. It's a win-win scenario."
"Shouldn't there be monetary compensation if you’re going to use my name for marketing?" he pointed out coldly.
Ah, shit. Han Sooyoung's smile froze on her face as her mind whirled in search of an adequate response. Coffee splashed onto the table as she channelled her growing irritation into her stirring. "Come on, Yoo Joonghyuk-ssi, you know I can't afford your actual rates! This is my directorial debut, I don't exactly have an unlimited budget."
"Then go ask one of the other people you blackmail. Don't you have a lot of victims?"
“My best friend is already coming on the show, thank you for asking. Speaking of him, he's the one I told you about who wanted to meet you, remember?"
"Three minutes."
“How rude. I thought we were friends,” she lied. “I really felt like I bonded with you backstage during the fashion show last—”
“Shut up,” growled Yoo Joonghyuk.
"One of the guests is totally your type," Han Sooyoung tried desperately, but she already knew it was a lost cause. She wasn't sure if Yoo Joonghyuk had a libido or was even capable of maintaining an erection for another human being. Knowing him, he probably jerked off to his Corsair K70 Lux keyboard every morning. "From what I've seen, she's a very kind, intellectual woman—a bit too intellectual for you, but you'll manage—does that not get your dead heart pounding?"
“Two minutes.”
“How the hell are you keeping time? There’s no way a minute goes by that quickly.”
“One minute.”
Damn him for being this difficult, she cursed internally. He was definitely going to die alone at this rate, just like the other bastard she knew. Forget about trying to set up a meeting; she could just bury them together once they were both dead and call it a day.
"There will be minimal interference from the production staff so you can do whatever you want on set!" Han Sooyoung blurted out. "I swear it won't get in the way of your daily activities. Not that there's much to get in the way of, considering how you're currently unemployed,” she added, unable to resist making the jab.
"If you're going to keep wasting my time, then you can leave. Twenty seconds."
Did this asshole think she was bluffing? It was time to pull out her trump card. “It seems as though our negotiations have fallen apart, Yoo Joonghyuk,” she said darkly, pulling out her phone. “You were the one who forced my hand, so don’t cry about what happens next.”
Yoo Joonghyuk just glared at her.
“Your teacher’s name is Namgung Minyoung, right?" Han Sooyoung sneered. "Her contact information isn’t that hard to find if you know where to look. She’ll be receiving an interesting email filled with very interesting photos tomorrow—”
"Enough," he snapped, slamming his palm down on the table. "I'll do it. But I'm not going to play along with your scripts, so don't even bother trying."
"I would never even dream of it," Han Sooyoung said in a solemn voice, pressing her hand to her heart. She secretly clenched her other hand into a fist underneath the table and pumped it in victory. "Thank you so much, Yoo Joonghyuk-ssi, I will never forget your kindness! I'll go delete your photos right now."
***
Han Sooyoung’s sudden appearance at Kim Dokja’s doorstep was a welcome distraction from his work on this lovely Saturday afternoon, but that novelty quickly wore off when she revealed her purpose for the visit. Kim Dokja couldn't think of a single thing in this world he wanted to do less than appearing on a dating show in front of the whole nation. There was a reason why he chose to write under a penname and refused to attend any book signings, and he wasn't about to reveal himself now, especially after the reception to his last book had been...mixed, to say the least.
"No one will realize who you are," Han Sooyoung assured Kim Dokja as she flopped down on the couch next to him. "You can just say you're a writer without mentioning what you've written. And if you do decide to tell everyone what your pen name is, I'll edit that part out of the final cut. Besides, all the staff members have signed NDAs, and it's not like they have the guts to cross me anyway." She raised her chin arrogantly.
"I'm not questioning your ability to keep a secret, I'm just acutely aware of the fact that I don't have a drama-stirring personality," Kim Dokja replied. "I'm sure there are plenty of people out there better suited for reality TV than I am."
She slung her arm across his shoulder and pulled him in. "Don't worry, I have an eye for these things, so trust me when I say you'll fit in perfectly."
"That isn't the compliment you think it is," Kim Dokja told her, shrugging off her arm and turning his attention back to the laptop on his lap. "Besides, a dating show is kind of..." An exhibitionist exercise in self-flagellation, or something like that.
"What's wrong with proactively searching for love, huh?" demanded Han Sooyoung. "How can you expect to meet your soulmate if you never put yourself out there?!"
"There are other ways of 'putting myself out there' that don't involve humiliating myself on national television."
She waved her hand in dismissal. "Please, you're not that embarrassing. Besides, aren’t you also currently unemployed? So it’s not like you have anything better to do.”
“I'm in-between works,” he corrected, not looking away from his laptop screen. The blinking cursor on the empty word document seemed to be mocking him as well. “And what do you mean by ‘also’? Did you lose your job when I wasn't looking?”
Han Sooyoung rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t be here if I lost my job, I’d be out looking for a new one.” Then, before he could stop her, she leaned over and peered at his screen. “Pfft, you only wrote 225 characters today? What happened to your famous typing speed?”
Kim Dokja pointedly turned his screen away from her prying eyes. “I’m still searching for inspiration.”
“How can you find inspiration when you’re cooped up in your condo every single day?” she asked dramatically, clutching her hand to her chest with an exaggerated look of pain. “Maybe that's why your last book was a flop.”
“It wasn't a flop,” Kim Dokja argued. “Not every book can be <Unbreakable Faith>, and that’s perfectly understandable.”
“You really need to get outside and see the world before your creativity dries up,” said Han Sooyoung. That much was objectively true, Kim Dokja conceded. “--Which is exactly why you should come on my show!” she declared, which was objectively not true.
“Han Sooyoung–”
"Listen, this is a win-win scenario for both of us,” she said, steeling her features into an expression of grim determination. “You get to find a girlfriend, and I get to save on production costs. I swear on my bank account that this is ten times less embarrassing than any of the matchmaking events I dragged you to in university. And,” she added, “I've also personally vetted all the guests, and I can assure you that they're all nice people you'll get along with. Well, most of them."
Kim Dokja sighed. There was really no good way to get out of this when she was this deadset on something. "I'll be seeking compensation for any psychological damage sustained during filming," he warned.
"I'm sure you'll be fine," drawled Han Sooyoung. She could barely hide the aura of smugness radiating off her in waves now that she knew that he knew she had won. "Don't you write romantic subplots into your webnovels all the time? You're practically a modern day Casanova."
"I only do it because my editor forces me to."
Han Sooyoung slid the contract across the table to him. "Sign it, Kim Dokja," she said gently. "It'll be a life-changing experience for you. Trust me."
At the end of the day, he did trust her with his life.
***
A few months and many suspiciously-worded contracts later, Kim Dokja found himself standing on the front steps of a beautiful sprawling mansion with large glass windows that spanned all the way from floor to ceiling. Glancing around the corner of the mansion, he could see the sprawling green tail of a garden full of carefully curated flowerbeds. Everything looked surprisingly high budget, meaning Han Sooyoung had been clearly exaggerating all those times she complained about financial difficulties.
As expected of Director Han Sooyoung, Kim Dokja thought to himself, torn between feeling proud of her and annoyed.
The sound of someone clearing their throat brought him out of his thoughts. Looking up, he saw his assigned cameraman waggling his eyebrows meaningfully at him.
“Okay, I’ll head inside,” said Kim Dokja after successfully interpreting the dance of eyebrows. “Am I the first one here, or have the others already arrived?”
He and the cameraman stared at each other in silence for a moment, until it dawned upon him that the cameraman wasn’t going to respond.
Kim Dokja sighed. “I see how it is. So I’m supposed to pretend you guys don’t exist, right?”
The camera nodded up and down eagerly.
Reality shows didn't have the same suspension of disbelief books or TV shows automatically commanded from their audience, so anything that broke the spell of plausible deniability was to be avoided at all costs. Under the camera’s watchful lens, Kim Dokja rang the doorbell. When he didn’t hear the sound of someone making their way over, he opened the door directly and walked inside.
The inside of the house was as lovely as the outside, its white walls adorned with soft, warm-hued decorations that matched the varnish on the wooden floors. There were a few suitcases and bags sitting on the ground of the hallway, breaking up the beige monotony with an explosion of colours. Standing in the foyer, he could hear muffled voices drifting over from where the living room presumably was. He clearly wasn’t the first or last one here, which was just what he had planned for when he headed out thirty minutes late this morning.
One, two, three pairs…that’s three out of eight. I wonder where they hid the staff members’ shoes?
Kim Dokja looked up at the sound of approaching footsteps just as a man and a woman emerged into the hallway before him.
"Hello," Kim Dokja greeted, toeing off his shoes at the entrance and sliding on the slippers provided by the house.
"Welcome! You're the fourth person here," the woman said cheerfully. Her long hair was tied in a loose braid draped over her shoulder, and her eyes were bright with curiosity as she discreetly looked him over.
Kim Dokja smiled at her. "That's good to hear. I was worried I would be late," he lied.
“Of course not!” the man, who was built like a soldier, assured him hastily. "Oh, um, and it’s nice to meet you. I'm Lee Hyunsung."
Kim Dokja nodded back at him politely and shook his hand. "Kim Dokja."
The woman introduced herself as Yoo Sangah, and the three of them headed inside after he set his suitcase down beside theirs. The third guest was sitting on the sofa in the living room as they entered, and he glanced up at them with a look of blatant disinterest plastered across his artfully sculpted features.
Looks like this is where Han Sooyoung’s budget went, Kim Dokja thought begrudgingly.
There was something vaguely nostalgic about that handsome face, like a movie Kim Dokja watched on a lazy Saturday a long time ago, or an old photograph stashed between the well-worn pages of a favourite book. Maybe the guy was some kind of model or actor? Either way, Kim Dokja was certain he had seen him somewhere before, probably on some billboard or YouTube ad he forgot to skip. With a strange tightness in his chest that he attributed to his burning curiosity, he took a seat next to the man on the couch.
"I'm Kim Dokja," he said, offering his hand in a universally friendly gesture. "You are...?"
The look of disinterest melted into something indistinguishable as the man stared back at him in silence.
Kim Dokja's back prickled at the unexpected reception, and his smile faltered. “Is something wrong?” he asked.
Their staring match lasted for almost an entire minute before the man finally tore his gaze away from Kim Dokja’s face. "Yoo Joonghyuk,” he said through gritted teeth, ignoring the offered hand.
What the hell was this guy’s problem? Kim Dokja stuffed his hand back into his pocket. “It’s nice to meet you, Joonghyuk-ssi,” he said carefully. “I heard you were the first one here today? I hope you didn’t have to wait for long—”
Yoo Joonghyuk stood up before he could finish his sentence and stormed out of the room.
“Is he alright?” Yoo Sangah asked the cameramen standing around them, who seemed equally clueless as to what was going on.
“I’ll go check on him!” A particularly young-looking staff member quickly got up from where she was sitting cross-legged on the floor and sprinted out of the room.
The three guests left in the room traded identical looks of confusion. Kim Dokja was starting to doubt Han Sooyoung had properly vetted the guests, or ‘incarnations’ as she called them—this Yoo Joonghyuk guy clearly had undiagnosed or undisclosed anger issues. He deeply pitied the person who would end up with him in the future.
“The weather is so nice today,” Lee Hyunsung offered in a pathetic attempt to steer the conversation away from the Yoo Joonghyuk-shaped elephant in the room.
“Indeed,” said Kim Dokja. He racked his brain for something interesting or inoffensively funny to say that wouldn’t be psychoanalysed to death by bored netizens in the future. Damn it, this was why he wasn’t suited for reality TV shows. “You can really taste the summer in the air.” Did he just say summer? “I mean flowers. Smelling the flowers.”
“Did you mean the wisteria blossoms out front?” Yoo Sangah piped up. “I agree, their scent is lovely. And rather strong too, now that I think about it.”
Kim Dokja was relieved that she didn’t point out his awkward turn of phrase. “I guess Han Sooyoung does have good taste.”
“Han Sooyoung…? You mean the director?” asked Lee Hyunsung, eyes wide. “Do you two know each other?”
“Well—”
Once again interrupting him in the middle of his sentence, Yoo Joonghyuk returned to the room and sat back down beside Kim Dokja. The collar of his shirt and the tips of his hair looked wet, as though he had accidentally splashed himself in the face while washing his hands. The staff member who had chased after him was back as well, and she said something to one of the cameramen before stepping outside the room with her phone, presumably to call Han Sooyoung.
“Are you not feeling well, Joonghyuk-ssi?” Yoo Sangah asked with a concerned frown.
“No.” Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t even spare her a glance. Instead, he leaned his head back against the couch and directed his gaze upwards towards the ceiling fixtures.
There were a few seconds of silence as the rest of them exchanged forced smiles. Yoo Joonghyuk's eyes remained fixed on the ceiling, as if he were silently praying for death to take him now.
Looking around the room in boredom, Kim Dokja noticed that there were rules written out on a whiteboard in the corner. "Dinner every day will be prepared in pairs of one man and one woman," he read out loud.
Yoo Sangah looked just as relieved as he was for the distraction. "Can you cook, Dokja-ssi?" she asked, sounding interested.
"I can cook some simple dishes, but nothing fancy," he replied. "How about you, Hyunsung-ssi?"
Lee Hyunsung rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish smile. "I'm not really good in the kitchen, sorry."
"That's alright, your partner can help you out."
Lee Hyunsung flushed and ducked his head, scratching at his neck awkwardly. Han Sooyoung was right; if this was what his competition was like, then Kim Dokja was practically Casanova in comparison. Well, he thought as he snuck a glance at Yoo Joonghyuk, that was if this guy stayed grumpy the whole time.
"What are your favourite dishes?" asked Yoo Sangah, folding her hands over the cushion she was cradling in her lap. It was amazing how she managed to carry the conversation through the valley of death on sheer willpower alone.
Kim Dokja’s mind blanked when he tried to think of an answer. "Any rice dish is fine."
"Rice is good," Lee Hyunsung said lamely.
"Yes," said Yoo Sangah. "It really is."
Silence again. Kim Dokja tried not to stare too obviously into the cameras glaring holes into the side of his face. When on earth were the other 4 guests going to get here?
"Yoo...Joonghyuk-ssi, do you have any preferences for dinner?" he asked, turning to the uncooperative man sitting beside him. Maybe he's just shy, Kim Dokja mused. He's obviously not acting like this on purpose to annoy you, don't get ahead of yourself.
"No," said Yoo Joonghyuk. He shifted away from Kim Dokja on the couch and closed his eyes, effectively ending the conversation.
Although Kim Dokja couldn’t care less about an asshole's opinion of him, it was kind of irritating how this man had such an obvious issue with him. Was this because he was talking to Yoo Sangah earlier? Damn, maybe this show was more cut-throat than he thought.
One of the cameramen cleared his throat and whispered, “Joonghyuk-ssi, please don't sleep until it's night."
The frown on Yoo Joonghyuk’s face deepend as he opened his eyes to glare at the offender, and the cameraman shrunk back in fear.
Thankfully, the sound of the doorknob turning broke through the suffocating atmosphere. Lee Hyunsung, Yoo Sangah and Kim Dokja shot to their feet in unison, eager to get away from the dumpster fire of a scene.
Two women had arrived together at the mansion, and they ran through a round of introductions again before settling back on the long sofa together.
"I'm Jang Hayoung," the younger of the two said in a melodious voice. With her smooth skin and delicate features, her face was almost on the same level as Yoo Joonghyuk’s, and Lee Hyunsung seemed to blush when she sat down next to him.
"Jung Heewon," the other woman said curtly. She gestured at Jang Hayoung. "We ran into each other earlier at the front gates."
"This house is so pretty," gushed Jang Hayoung. "I can't believe the director managed to book a place like this for us! Have you guys seen the backyard yet?”
Jang Hayoung was the talkative type, and conversation flowed relatively smoothly after her arrival. Even though Yoo Joonghyuk was still doing his best to cosplay as the statue of David, he did show some signs of life when addressed directly, even if his responses were still curt and unfriendly.
It was clear that both Jung Heewon and Jang Hayoung were intrigued by Yoo Joonghyuk’s tragic mix of flawless looks and bitchy personality, though luckily Yoo Sangah didn't look interested in him at all. The thought of having to send a romantic text to a stranger in a few hours was still daunting to Kim Dokja, but at least he and Yoo Sangah seemed to be getting along rather well. She was currently the person he liked the most in the whole house, while Yoo Joonghyuk was dead last on the list.
After another thirty minutes, the last two guests—an elegant-looking woman named Lee Seolhwa and a young man named Kim Namwoon—arrived. Kim Namwoon was clearly the youngest out of all of them, and his edgy personality made him a strong contender for the title of Kim Dokja’s most disliked person. When Lee Seolhwa introduced herself, Kim Dokja noticed that Yoo Joonghyuk actually seemed to pay attention for once. Even rocks could bloom into flowers, huh.
While everyone else was making small talk, Kim Namwoon was staring at Yoo Joonghyuk with a pinched look of concentration like he was trying to piece a difficult puzzle together.
"Wow, the bedrooms here are also really nice!” Jang Hayoung marvelled as they made their way upstairs to tour the rooms. "Seolhwa-ssi, do you usually sleep on the top bunk or lower bunk?"
"Lower bunk, but either is fine."
"Then I'll sleep on the top bunk!"
"There are two rooms for the men and two beds in each," Lee Hyunsung reported back after checking inside them. "We should probably split into pairs?"
Kim Dokja glanced at Yoo Joonghyuk from the corner of his eye, and their gazes met in mid-air. They immediately looked away from each other with matching grimaces. “Lee Hyunsung-ssi,” he began, “do you—"
"Holy fuck, you're YJH!" yelled Kim Namwoon, slamming his fist into his palm. Beside him, Jung Heewon plugged her finger into her ear with a look of annoyance. "The Supreme King! I knew I recognized you from somewhere, I went to the world championships last year—"
"Careers aren't supposed to be revealed until tomorrow night," one of the cameramen hastily cut in. "Please refrain from discussing such topics right now."
The name YJH sounded really familiar, but Kim Dokja couldn't remember exactly where he had heard it before.
"World championships?" Jung Heewon repeated, raising an eyebrow. "You have fans, Joonghyuk-ssi? Interesting."
"'Supreme King' is such a lame title," Kim Dokja couldn’t resist saying.
Yoo Joonghyuk shot him a death glare. "Shut up." It was the first thing Yoo Joonghyuk had said to him since their introduction, and Kim Dokja couldn’t help but think of it as a minor victory.
Kim Namwoon was still staring up at his idol with a look of awe. Said idol’s face was expressionless as always, but upon closer examination, he seemed a bit unnaturally tense.
"You know, you two should room together," Kim Dokja said innocently. "It'll be a pleasant experience for both of you, I'm sure. Lee Hyunsung-ssi and I can share a room."
Lee Hyunsung looked incredibly flattered. “Sure!”
If looks could kill, then Yoo Joonghyuk would be jailed for first degree murder. "Kim Dokja..."
"I'd be honoured to, Yoo Joonghyuk-ssi," Kim Namwoon said seriously. His voice sounded a little choked with raw emotion. "I have so much I want to talk about with you, like what you think about the new meta—"
"Like what the staff members said, let's save the discussion for another time," Lee Seolhwa interrupted with a calm smile. "Shouldn’t we decide who's cooking dinner tonight first?"
"I can cook for us!” Shifting gears immediately, Kim Namwoon leaned against the wall in what he obviously thought was a cool way. It was not. "Lee Seolhwa-ssi, do you—"
"I can help out too," said Jang Hayoung. There was an eager spark in her eyes, and she was already rolling up her sleeves. "Do you want to head downstairs together? I want to check out the ingredients in the kitchen."
Kim Namwoon looked dejected for a second, but he quickly recovered and smoothly held out an arm. "Ladies first," he declared, purposefully lowering his voice in what he obviously thought was a cool way. It was not.
Yoo Sangah and Lee Seolhwa winced, and Jung Heewon face-palmed. Jang Hayoung just laughed and disappeared down the stairs, with Kim Namwoon trailing after her dejectedly.
Eventually, the six of them made their way outside to check out the beautiful backyard Jang Hayoung kept bringing up. Kim Dokja naturally fell into step beside Yoo Sangah as they walked, and he learned through their conversation that she had a charming laugh and a remarkably stubborn side. It was rather soothing to talk to her, but that was about the extent of his ‘feelings’ towards her. Did all romantic relationships begin with this level of indifference? He wasn’t sure, but luckily, he had a whole month to figure things out.
Yoo Joonghyuk, on the other hand, was the complete opposite of Yoo Sangah. Talking to him, even briefly, was like squeezing toothpaste out of an empty tube or banging his head against the wall. Kim Dokja had no idea why Han Sooyoung chose Yoo Joonghyuk for the show when he couldn’t go five minutes without saying something rude, but he supposed that the man's handsome looks made up for his horrible personality. Surprisingly, Lee Seolhwa didn't seem to mind said personality, and she actually managed to engage him in productive conversation.
Jang Hayoung called them inside for dinner after an hour or so, and they filed back into the dining room. Kim Dokja found himself sitting opposite Yoo Joonghyuk, and fought the urge to step on his foot under the table and claim it was an accident. That would be too petty, even for him.
"I made the pork belly, chicken wings, eggs, and vegetables," said Jang Hayoung, pointing at the plates one by one. She hesitated as her eyes landed on the mysterious pile of char that looked like it belonged in the compost bin. "And Kim Namwoon-ssi made, uh, that."
"It's my secret stir-fry noodle recipe." Kim Namwoon had the audacity to look proud of the abomination he birthed unto this world. "Enjoy."
Kim Dokja stared at the disastrous dish in front of him, and it stared back at him. It was oozing a weird burnt scent that was starting to make him lose his appetite. He secretly pushed it towards Yoo Joonghyuk's side, and the man pushed it back with a glare.
Out of respect for Kim Namwoon's efforts, all of them except Yoo Joonghyuk took a token chopsticks-worth of the disaster after he insisted they try it.
"It has an...interesting taste," said Lee Seolhwa. She held up her hand in front of her mouth as she valiantly tried to keep the mouthful down. "The texture is very crispy."
Kim Dokja, Yoo Sangah and Jang Hayoung nodded in agreement. Lee Hyunsung didn't say anything, clearly unsettled by his companions' expressions of pain.
Jung Heewon was the one to break it to him after she spat out her mouthful into her napkin. "This tastes awful," she said bluntly, chugging down half of her glass of water. Kim Dokja admired her straight-forwardness. "We should ban him from the kitchen, seriously."
Kim Namwoon scowled at her. "I'd like to see you do better," he sneered.
"Oh yeah? I could do better than you in my sleep."
"Let's not get into an argument at the table," said Yoo Sangah, placing a placating hand on Jung Heewon's shoulder. "Kim Namwoon-ssi, I’m afraid you may have overcooked the noodles a little this time, but I really appreciate you cooking for us. It was really kind of you two to offer."
Kim Namwoon leaned back in his chair with a huff, but he seemed appeased. Jung Heewon rolled her eyes.
After dinner was the dreaded texting event and simultaneous highlight of the show, where they were required to send a text to someone else in the house anonymously. The women retreated upstairs to their room, while the four men headed to the living room once again. This time, however, Kim Dokja chose to sit far, far away from Yoo Joonghyuk.
Somehow, all the words and phrases seemed to evaporate from Kim Dokja’s mind when faced with the blank screen of his phone. He knew he wanted to text Yoo Sangah, but what on earth was he supposed to say to someone he barely even considered a friend? Across the room from him, Lee Hyunsung looked like he was struggling as well, so at least he wasn’t alone in this.
Finally, Kim Dokja finished composing his text and pressed 'send'. Task successfully accomplished, he leaned back in his chair and let out a long exhale. It would be a little embarrassing if he didn't receive any texts tonight in return, but he wouldn’t be on this show if he didn’t think he could tolerate that level of minor embarrassment. When he turned his head to the side, he noticed that Yoo Joonghyuk was staring at him again, and he sent him a defiant glare. Yoo Joonghyuk looked away.
***
[Constellation Observatory]
"And now, it's finally time–for our predictions!" announced Bihyung, tapping the huge blackboard at the head of the table with his tacky pointer to get their attention. "Let's start with the four gentlemen first. Who do you think Lee Hyunsung will text tonight?"
"I think he'll choose Jung Heewon," Uriel suggested, folding her hands under her chin with starry eyes. "They seemed like they got along with each other well earlier tonight."
"But he blushed when Jang Hayoung sat down next to him," Sun Wukong pointed out.
"I do remember that moment, but they never spoke to each other again after that, and Jang Hayoung seems much more interested in Yoo Joonghyuk. So, I still think it's Jung Heewon!"
"It's the interaction that matters," Yi Sunsin said wisely, stroking his beard. "I agree with Uriel."
Sun Wukong scratched his ear idly. “You know what, that makes sense. Let’s just put Jung Heewon for today.”
Bihyung drew an arrow from Lee Hyunsung to Jung Heewon on the chalkboard with his blue chalk. "Moving on! Any guesses for Yoo Joonghyuk?"
"Lee Seolhwa," said Asmodeus, leaning back in his chair with a lazy grin. "She's the only one he's even remotely interested in."
" I think he was far more interested in Kim Dokja than anyone else in the house," Uriel argued.
Yi Sunshin and Sun Wukong shot her exasperated looks.
"I agree, it's definitely Lee Seolhwa,” said Yi Sunsin.
“Same.”
Uriel’s mouth turned up into a pout, but she didn’t protest when Bihyung drew his blue line across the board.
"Next up, Kim Dokja," declared Bihyung. “Personally, I think he's pretty hard to read this episode. It's hard to tell which one of the ladies he likes better."
"I think it's Yoo Sangah," said Sun Wukong, perking up at the sound of Kim Dokja’s name. "They were talking to each other the whole time during that walk before dinner, and she's also the first person he met."
Yi Sunshin tapped his knuckles against the desk, looking deep in thought. "If we're going by that logic, then he also spoke to Jung Heewon quite a bit tonight. And he clearly agreed with her when she called out Kim Namwoon's cooking, so that's also a possibility."
Uriel looked like she wanted to suggest someone completely different, but thought better of it and closed her mouth. "I guess I agree with everyone, it’s probably Yoo Sangah."
"Then I'll put Yoo Sangah down for him. What about Kim Namwoon?"
"Lee Seolhwa," Sun Wukong said in a solemn voice.
“Lee Seolhwa,” said Asmodeus.
"Poor child," said Yi Sunshin.
Bihyung chalk scratched across the board as he drew a long, pathetic arrow from Kim Namwoon's picture to Lee Seolhwa's.
"Question," Uriel said brightly, raising her hand. "Are you allowed to send a text to someone of the same gender?"
The other constellations stared at her in confusion.
"I don't think so," Bihyung answered cautiously. He glanced at Han Sooyoung who was standing in a corner of the room for confirmation, but she just smirked at him. "And, uh, I really don’t think it matters. Anyway, moving on to the ladies now. Any guesses for Yoo Sangah?"
"Kim Dokja."
"Jung Heewon?"
"Maybe Lee Hyunsung? I'm not sure, she's also a difficult person to read."
"It's Yoo Joonghyuk," Asmodeus said wryly.
"Why?” asked Uriel, frowning. “She spent the most time with Lee Hyunsung tonight."
"She was clearly interested when Kim Namwoon almost revealed our guest's occupation," came the haughty reply. "However, I doubt the interest will last; he doesn't seem interested in her in the slightest. Which is understandable."
Uriel narrowed her eyes at Asmodeus, but once again refrained from saying anything.
"I agree with Uriel, I think it's Lee Hyunsung,” Sun Wukong insisted, kicking back in his chair and propping his feet on the table. "I can tell there's something between them, and my eyes are never wrong.”
"Alright, the vote count is 3 to 1, so I'll put Lee Hyunsung down for her.” Bihyung drew his customary line with a gender-stereotyping pink chalk. “Next up, Jang Hayoung."
"Probably Yoo Joonghyuk, she's been sneaking glances at him all night long."
Sun Wukong clicked his tongue. "That guy’s really popular with our female guests, huh?"
“His face is truly unparalleled.”
"And lastly, Lee Seolhwa," announced Bihyung.
"Yoo Joonghyuk as well." Sun Wukong sighed and scratched his head. "This is looking to be an absolute mess. Only Kim Dokja and Yoo Sangah aren't implicated in the love polygon right now, but that might be subject to change next episode."
Bihyung’s chalk scratched across the board one last time, and thus the diagram of unrequited love was complete. He set down his chalk and dusted off his hands before clearing his throat. “Great job, Constellations! Now, let’s head to the mansion and see how our guests are faring."