Chapter Text
"So many lives lost because I held back. When I should've used all my power."
-Clark Kent, The Superman (Injustice: Gods Among Us)
Fear. Doubt. Guilt. Rage.
Such powerful negative emotions called to Gabriel Agreste like a flame to a moth. And like the proverbial moth, he was drawn by its allure. But this...this was different. Normally he would akumatize them and sick them on Ladybug and Chat Noir. The negative emotions though, were growing. Festering. Like a tumor too early to detect.
But worse was the cause. Loss. Of a mother. A wife. And it reminded him of his own wife sleeping deep beneath the house. It caused a feeling not unfamiliar to Gabriel - empathy. He wouldn't act on these feelings. Not this time. It would be like akumatizing his own son. And he couldn't do that to him. Time would heal this wound, and he would let it pass.
But if a time came when the emotions would be too strong to ignore, then he wouldn't hesitate. A negative emotion too strong for even Ladybug and Chat Noir to conquer. How could he pass that opportunity?
Adrien stood there, letting Marinette cry into his shoulder as Chat Noir. For the first time since he'd known her, she seemed so small, so...fragile. He'd never seen her like this before - maybe frustrated the first time they met after the misunderstanding with Chloe. But this...she was broken. And he had no idea what to say to his friend as she sobbed and sobbed into his shoulder until he could feel the tears start to soak into his clothes.
And he couldn't blame her for it either. He knew exactly where she was coming from - his own mom had simply vanished from his life. He had no idea if she was alive or dead, if she was okay or not. But Marinette did. And it devastated her. All he could think to do right then was try to be a good friend. The one she desperately needed right now.
Once her cries died down, he tilted her head up to look at him and said, "I'm going to take you back to your dad, okay? He's worried about you. So are your friends, Alya and Nino."
She nodded silently and let him carry her in his arms bridal style as he leapt across the Parisian rooftops to her room above the bakery. He escorted her inside through the balcony and guided her downstairs into the living room where Nino and Alya were still talking to her dad. Upon seeing her, Alta was the first one to hug her, "Girl. I'm so sorry."
"Me too," Nino joined the hug. Marinette was quiet, almost in a daze as she stared at her dad coming to hug her, "Marinette. Please don't scare me like that again."
She didn't answer. And it was worrying Adrien. Everything about this was wrong - Marinette was not okay. She was far from it. But what could he do? What could he say? Probably nothing as Chat Noir. But as Adrien Agreste? But that would have to wait. Marinette would be fine for now as long as she had her dad, Alya, and Nino.
Right now, he had to find Ladybug and figure out what the hell happened. He crept his way back to the door but stopped when Marinette finally spoke, "Chat."
"Yes?" he paused to offer her a small smile. She nodded, "Thank you."
"It's nothing. Just doing what heroes do," he winked before stepping out onto the stairs. He stopped at the foot when he saw the hood stain still there. From her mother. The one who was no longer around. He glanced back up the stairs, wondering if he should stick around a little longer but decided against it. He could check on her tomorrow at school. As he continued on, Alya ran out and called after him, "Chat Noir!?"
He looked back and smiled at her, "Hey there Miss Ladyblog."
"Marinette. Thanks for finding her," she said after catching her breath, "Where was she?"
"A few blocks from here. She seemed...lost," he explained quickly to conceal the fact that he was looking for her, "She started crying the moment I found her. I figured whatever happened, she needed to be with her family."
"She really does," Alya nodded, looking back up at the bakery grimly. He took a bow, "Look after her. The last thing she needs right now is to be akumatized. I have to go find m'lady and ask her about what happened!"
He took off quickly before she could say anything else, hoping to avoid an awkward conversation about throwing things off roofs. Unfortunately, he never found Ladybug. After days of looking after school or when he had a free day, it was like she disappeared. He worried about what he would do if she wasn't around when an Akuma attacked. Or worse, what he should do if whatever compelled her to throw a man off a roof led to her akumatization. Hopefully, it wouldn't come to that.
Alya and Nino spent the night, calling their families to let them know where they were and just trying to be there for Marinette and her dad. Marinette wanted to say something to her dad. To Nino. To Alya. Her best friend. But the words just kept getting choked up in the back of her throat. And they could tell she wasn't alright.
Her dad called her off school for a couple of days, which was good because she wasn't sure she could face her classmates at the moment. Alya came over every day after school to visit and drop off her homework, but the pile just kept on growing because Marinette couldn't bring herself to face it either. Most of her time at home was spent lying in bed staring at the phone quietly. It hadn't rung once since she got it. But her mind kept coming back to it - Who was on the other end. Why her? Why did it have to happen to her family!?
Whenever she put the phone away, it was just to go back to sleep. The world could wait now. The world would have to. Ladybug didn't want to come out. Sometimes she wondered if an Akuma would come after her. But one never did. But it didn't bring her relief. In fact, all it did was make her tired.
Whenever she could find the strength to get out of bed, it was usually just to eat or to use the bathroom. But that felt more like a routine than a need. She was barely hungry anymore. All she felt was tired. Tired and guilt for what she had done. And what she had failed to do.
Helping her dad out in the bakery helped to clear her head, but it was just a distraction for her. And even that didn't last long because all it did was remind her of the fact that her mom wasn't around anymore. Still, she had to endure. She tried to endure. The busier she kept, the easier it would be to distract herself from these thoughts. Even talking to customers on busy days seemed to help.
At the end of an exceptionally busy day, she started closing up the bakery when she noticed Master Fu of all people standing across the street - watching her. Her heart began to sink as he gestured with his finger for her to come outside, her throat becoming dry and palms sweating.
Against her better judgment, she went outside to meet him, "Master Fu."
"We need to have a very serious talk, Marinette," he said quietly, turning to lead the way, "We can walk as we talk."
She looked back at the bakery that was still half closed. She didn't want this conversation now but it seemed Master Fu wasn't giving her a choice. Quietly, unsure of herself, Marinette followed obediently while fiddling with her fingers. He didn't say anything for the longest time and that made her mind race in fear. Was he going to take the Miraculous? Punish her? What was he here to do?
"I'm sorry about your mother Marinette," he finally said, "I heard about what happened. I'm truly sorry for your loss."
That couldn't have been the only reason he was her. She was sure of it. And he continued, "But I also know about what you did. The Miraculouses are tools to inspire hope and bring change for the better. What you did was an indulgence for yourself."
He was right. It was. But that man deserved it for what he did to her mother. Surely Master Fu could understand that? She murmured, "It was justice."
"That's not justice, Marinette. That's revenge," Master Fu answered sternly, his eyes hiding the smallest trace of sadness behind their disappointment, "Justice was when you stopped him and let the police have him. Revenge was when you dropped him off a roof. And the Miraculous must never be used for that."
He was right. She knew he was right, "I'm sorry."
"This is a difficult time for you, but that makes it all the more important that you be careful. You mustn't allow yourself to be akumatized like Chloe was. If the holder of the Ladybug Miraculous were to be akumatized…nothing would stop them," Master Fu added quickly. She paused, feeling like a failure and terrible for being reminded of her short comings. The she felt him place a hand on her and squeeze gently, smiling calmly, "We're here for you, if you need us Marinette."
"That's what I've been trying to tell her."
She looked down and saw Tikki poking her head out of her purse, "Tikki?"
Tikki floated up to hug her cheek, before disappearing back down into her purse, "I'm glad you're at least talking now. You've been so quiet for days. I was worried."
"I'm sorry I haven't been myself. I just…can't stop thinking about what happened. It just keeps playing in my mind. Over and over again," she answered sheepishly. Master Fu went on to add, "I understand, Marinette. But there are people who care about you. People who worry. Don't fret so much. And don't forget that they're here for you if you need them."
He paused again before sighing, "However, I think it would be best if you gave the Miraculous to me for the next few days while you deal with your loss."
Marinette's eyes widened, "But Master Fu-"
"No buts Marinette. We can't risk you being akumatized while you possess a Miraculous," Master Fu countered.
"But…I don't think I can do this without Tikki," Marinette added quietly, her eyes shifting back down to the little kwami. The small creature nodded and floated back up to greet Master Fu, "Master, I think I should stay with Marinette for now."
Marinette was surprise to see the kwami take her side, remembering what she said about the other Miraculous holders before her. The old man looked between the two, hesitating for a moment before agreeing, "Okay, I'll trust you two. But if anything happens, I won't hesitate to take the Miraculous. Tikki, take care of Marinette. And Marinette…feel better."
He gave them one last hopeful smile before turning to leave. Marinette felt her smile vanish. Would she feel better? Would this…hurt…ever go away?