Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’d been two hours. It’d been two hours since Chiron came down from Atlanta. Two hours since he first got to see Kevin after all those years and one hour since he told Kevin that he’d been the only man to touch him with no one ever since. An hour.
When Chiron made the confession, he honestly didn’t know what he was expecting. He didn’t know if Kevin would accept him. If Kevin wasn’t ready, rejected him, Chiron knew to put on his armor and protect himself and his feelings. Something he wasn’t able to do when he was younger. Something he learned to do as time and streets hardened him. Kevin didn’t reject him though. In fact he embraced him with open arms and a warm smile. He walked over to Chiron and wrapped his arms around him. They had stayed like that a while. Kevin sighed into Chiron’s neck and inhaled, taking his scent in, placing palms on a sturdy back, running them over tense muscles. Kevin kept doing it until he felt the muscles relax and give in to his pleading hands. How long had it taken Chiron to sculpt himself so beautifully? He thought to himself. Kevin let his brain wander, losing himself in Chiron and the embrace. He forgot that he was tired after a long work day. He forgot about the tea he’d set on the stove. Chiron just made everything seem unimportant.
“Look, Chiron,” Kevin said, pulling away, “I… Ion know what to say, man.” He said scratching his head and looking down.
“You ain’t gotta say nothing.” Chiron said shrugging, indifferent. Kevin looked at him, bewildered.
“Naw, man. I didn’t mean it like that. You know… I just don’t know where to start. I wasn’t able to stop thinking about you since you left, man.” Kevin leaned against the countertop, putting his head down as if that would help the blockage going on in his brain. “There were so many things left…unsaid.” Chiron nodded, remaining silent.
“When you left, Chiron… I didn’t think I would ever have this opportunity. To tell you how sorry I am. To tell you that…I fucked up… I really fucked up, Black.” Kevin let out a breath and waited for Chiron to say something. Anything. He clenched his fists out of worry. Chiron hadn’t said a word to him yet. Just looked at him in that silent way of his. The look made him want to just reveal himself to Chiron. It made him just want to crack his soul open to him. He didn’t know how to do it with just his words, since it was physically impossible to do what he wanted. He needed Chiron to understand. But understand what? The water began to boil at last, offering some relief. Kevin jumped to go get it, offering a small, shy smile as he poured the water into a mug. He made a gesture for Chiron to sit down at the table. He brought the tea to Chiron and set it in front of him, Chiron nodding his head in thanks.
“I told you that I don’t be drinking that shit, man.” Chiron said quietly, fiddling with the mug. Kevin gave him another look.
“Well, you told me you got a headache, man. I ain’t gon’ have you moanin’ and groanin’ all night.” Kevin paused, smiling. “You a lightweight forreal, man. It’s probably all the alcohol that you couldn’t taste.” He said. When Chiron chuckled, he looked up surprised. Chiron quickly intercepted the look but Kevin didn’t notice. He still needed Chiron to forgive him. Needed him to get how awful he felt, losing all those years with him.
“Kev…it’s okay, man. We straight. There’s nothing else to say or do. All we got to do now is make up for lost time.” Chiron said. He didn’t want to dwell on the past. He just wanted time with Kevin, time to rekindle and spark whatever they may have had and he wanted to do it soon. Kevin looked at him, searching for any hint of doubt or something else that could’ve betrayed the words he so smoothly delivered. But he found nothing. All he saw in Chiron’s eyes was mystery and honesty. He nodded slowly, swallowing what had seemed like a hundred cotton balls. He cleared his throat and turned his attention to Chiron’s tea once more.
“You really gon’ leave that tea here, huh?” He said shaking his head in fake mourning. Chiron pushed the mug away from himself and nodded.
“I gave you warning, man.” He said and smiled again. He looked down quickly, eyes always avoiding Kevin’s gaze. Kevin got up, taking Chiron’s mug and setting it on the counter. He walked back over to Chiron.
“Come on then, Black,” Kevin said while walking away, “I’m pretty sure you tired now. I’ll show you where you can sleep tonight.” Chiron stood up, putting his hands in his pockets. He followed Kevin. He still had some leftover clothes in the car from when he went to visit Teresa and stay with her for a few days. She often liked his company and he tried to visit whenever he could. As a habit, he always left some clean clothes to stay in. He absently wondered if he had some sweats to stay in. He didn’t want to sleep in his boxers in Kevin’s home, didn’t want to reveal himself like that yet.
The room looked comfortable, still faintly smelling of paint and fresh linen. As if no one had the time to give the room the scent of being lived in. There was a full size bed with thick blankets and a ton of pillows, which Chiron knew would be discarded as soon as his nightmares came to visit. He could only hope that Kevin wouldn’t bear witness to any of them.
“It’s small, but it’s something that’ll keep you warm and safe.” Kevin said looking around once more. Chiron nodded again and Kevin paused, looked at Chiron and chuckled.
“What?” Chiron said looking down. Kevin wished Chiron would stop hiding his beautiful eyes from him. They were constantly filled with questions, always searching. Kevin wanted to respond with kisses on his dark skin, wanted to lay Chiron down and make him forget all the wrong, wanted to make him scream his name until he went hoarse and couldn’t speak or scream anymore. Kevin felt the electricity in his body, felt the warmth pooling in his stomach and knowing what that signified, he quickly veered away from his thoughts and focused on an appropriate response.
“Ima need you to start saying more to me, Black. You’re driving me crazy not knowin what’s going on in that head of yours.” Kevin said. Chiron looked down again and kicked a foot out, watching the carpet color change from light to dark to light again.
“You got any clothes witchu? I know you not about to sleep in them jeans.” Kevin said pointing to his guest’s uncomfortable bed wear.
“Nah. I got some clothes in the car. I just gotta go grab them.” Chiron said. Kevin nodded and followed Chiron out.
Finally, when all was said and done, Chiron changed into his sleepwear for the night. Black sweatpants and a gray wife beater. Deciding that it was too hot for even a wife beater, Chiron peeled it off and threw it amongst the pillows. He walked slowly over to the light, looking at everything again, really wondering if he were about to sleep in Kevin’s home. Once grasping that everything around him was tangible, he flicked the light off and got under the covers. The smell was comforting, the darkness was even more comforting. The man he had an intense passion for. The same man who made Chiron really understand who he was that night at the beach was there with him, in the same home. Even then, Kevin understood. For years, Chiron pushed that night to the back of his mind because he didn’t think that he’d ever have the chance to see Kevin again. The memories were sometimes too painful. But every night, Chiron had one of two dreams. He’d either see his mother, screaming, while she pumped herself full of drugs, for Chiron to get away from her. Her eyes were full of disgust. The only thing she ever looked at with longing or love was a syringe. Sometimes, Chiron wished he was the syringe just to get a feeling of the love his mother hid away from him so well. If the dream was really bad, she’d chase him and try to pump him with the drugs too, saying, “Don’t you wanna be numb, baby? Huh, Chiron…?” She’d laugh and her eyes would look glassy. Seeing but not seeing at the same time. Chiron feared being numb. Life was painful but feeling it, made him stronger. He didn’t need to run away from anything. He’d wake up drenched in sweat, tears never surfacing to express the fear, the hatred and the love he had for his mother. She was trying to get better but his head wouldn’t forgive her, generating the same reason as to why Chiron should hate his mother. Every night.
The other dream he had was at the same beach where Kevin showed him what it was like to be desired. To be wanted and appreciated. He was grown in that dream, and Kevin, he maintained the look he had currently with his caramel skin and plump lips. Always ready to give a smile. Chiron would be sitting on the sand and staring blankly into the ocean, darkened by the night, wishing it would take him away. Perhaps to another life, perhaps to Kevin. He never really knew. He’d be there for a while before Kevin actually showed up. Kevin always showed up. He’d smile at Chiron and sit down next to him, somehow knowing that he needed silence. They waited, watched the ocean together, watched the moon and maybe the stars if they were available. Eventually Chiron got tired and would lie down on the sand. Kevin would look at him and smile and he’d keep on looking until Chiron would smile, look away and quietly ask what’s up.
“You a real beauty, Chiron. Damn.” He’d say while sucking his teeth and shaking his head. True to real life, Chiron would be quiet. He took the opportunity to breathe, to relax.
“Forreal, man. I just wanna…” Kevin stopped himself and looked out into the water. He laughed while shaking his head. “Nevermind, Black.”
“Whatchu wanna do? Huh, nigga? You goin’ soft on me?” Chiron would ask, teasingly. Kevin looked down at him in mock appall.
“I see you still have that smartass mouth, huh?” He said. Chiron stared back, smiling.
“I’m still tryna figure out what you wanna do.” Chiron said, not knowing where his bravery came from. Kevin grinned and climbed over his body, straddling him.
“You wanna know that badly?” Kevin asked. Chiron shrugged, still acting nonchalant, when really his heart was racing and threatening to run out of his chest. Kevin kept looking but Chiron kept his silence. “Oh, so you can act big but you don’t know how to speak, huh?” Kevin said. “That’s okay, I’m sure that I can get something out of you.” He made eye contact with Chiron again before going for his pants. He skillfully unbuttoned Chiron’s jeans and pulled them down. Chiron’s mouth slightly opened but he bit his lip again, in anticipation.
“You gon’ say anything yet?” Kevin asked while grabbing ahold of Chiron’s hard length. He saw Chiron’s abs clench through his dark blue t-shirt as he tried to control himself. Lip still held down by his teeth, he shook his head, arms by his side, grabbing the sand as Kevin slowly stroked. Kevin stuck his other hand up Chiron’s shirt, rubbing his stomach.
“Take that off,” he said quietly pulling Chiron’s shirt. “I wanna see you.” Chiron sat up, Kevin still in his lap and pulled his shirt off in one movement, making sure to lay back slowly onto the sand. Kevin groaned low and Chiron instantly recognized the sound. It was hunger. Kevin swooped down for a kiss, slow and passionate, savoring everything that was Chiron. He sighed into the kiss and felt Chiron’s hands cup his face. He pulled away and pinned Chiron’s hands above his head, swollen lips forming another smirk.
“Ah, ah, man. You’re not using your words, so don’t use your hands neither.” He went back to stroking Chiron, making sure to look him in the eyes. Chiron fidgeted, mouth slipping open. He looked at Kevin’s hands working him, going fast, trying to bring him to the edge. He started to arch before he could control himself.
“Come on now,” Kevin said, “I wanna hear you, Chiron.” Chiron whimpered, breathing quickly, finding himself trying to run away from Kevin’s grasp, his eyes, his lips. He didn’t want to come quick. He wanted to be in the moment forever.
Kevin stopped, removing his hands from Chiron’s body. Chiron gasped at the loss of contact and instinctively grabbed himself. Kevin batted his hands away not even a second later. He started to remove his own clothes and got off of Chiron. He positioned himself between Chiron’s legs and gently spread them. He leaned down and whispered to Chiron.
“I know you wanted to get close, but you’ll speak when you want it bad enough.” He kissed his neck and pulled away. He pointed two fingers to Chiron. “Suck ‘em.” Chiron did without question or protestation. Kevin had to close his eyes to block out the sinful sight of Chiron with his fingers. After what seemed like forever, he pulled them away, almost coming at the sight of Chiron’s plump open lips glistening, eyes filled with submission. He positioned his fingers at Chiron’s entrance, slowly entering, watching Chiron’s face for any discomfort. Chiron immediately tensed up, arching his back. He tried to work his hips, get used to the feeling. Kevin placed a hand on his stomach, stilling him.
“I know. I know, Chiron. Just relax, man. I’m tryna make it good for you.” Kevin said softly. Chiron couldn’t help but be grateful. Even when they were teenagers and they were at the beach the first time, Kevin always made it about Chiron and only him. “So damn tight.” Kevin muttered to himself and breaking Chiron out of thought. He felt his face heat up and he concealed a smile.
Eventually the two fingers started to feel good, Kevin added another and Chiron found himself spilling out moans. He threw his head to one side and tried to get more. More of Kevin. More of this euphoric feeling. He looked up at the stars and again at Kevin, who was positioning himself against Chiron’s entrance. He looked at Chiron to confirm that it was okay and Chiron nodded.
The stretch felt good. It wasn’t too much for Chiron. He knew that Kevin was trying to control himself. He tensed without meaning to and Kevin immediately dropped his head down, groaning.
“You can’t do that shit to me, Chiron,” he said panting from the effort of controlling himself. It took every ounce of willpower to not just plow Chiron into the sand and make him come over and over and over again. Chiron arched up, moaning as Kevin went in deeper. It was a connection that he’d long been waiting for. He finally got it, was getting it in the place that started it all. It meant so much more to him for that.
“Kev…” he half sighed and half moaned gripping nothing but sand, “More. Gimme more.” Finally, everything was becoming too much for him. He spoke. Kevin looked unsure at first, perhaps hesitating for too long because Chiron wrapped his legs around him and brought him in roughly, mouth dropping open. The sensation was so overwhelming, Chiron was letting out broken moans, repeating Kevin’s name over and over again. Kevin, trying to clear the fog that was his brain, clumsily grabbed for Chiron’s length once more and worked Chiron with quick strokes. The heat in his stomach was so intense. He was so close, but it was about Chiron. Always about Chiron.
“Come on, Chi, come for me.” Kevin said thrusting hard and fast. He pulled Chiron closer, and leaned down. Chiron’s eyes were closed tight, grabbing sand roughly. His stomach contracting beautifully with every breath he took. Kevin kissed his jaw, going down to his neck and sucking hard. Chiron bared his neck to get more, grabbed onto Kevin’s shoulders and started to see his vision spot out with pleasure.
“Kev…Kevin,” he swallowed and another moan was punched out of him as Kevin went impossibly faster. This man was on a mission.
“Come for me, Chiron.” Kevin moaned, thrusting erratically, a signal that he was even closer. Chiron grabbed at his back and pulled him closer to close the distance between their chests. His eyes rolled back and he arched up as waves and waves of pleasure consumed him. He didn’t know what to do, he felt so good. He clawed at Kevin’s back while streams of come painted both their stomachs and Kevin’s hand. Kevin kissed his neck through his orgasm and whispered words of praise in between in each kiss. “You look so beautiful when you come. So beautiful, Chiron.” He stopped thrusting hard into Chiron because he didn’t want him to be overstimulated. He knew that pleasure would soon turn into pain if he did. He took slow, long thrusts, hoping not to disturb the peace too much. Chiron was still recovering, still panting. Sweat beads glistened on his neck and chest.
Kevin came not too long after Chiron. He’d already been so impossibly close but he held out for Chiron. His arms were supporting him, palms flat against the sand.
“Oh, shit.” Kevin groaned, going rigid. Chiron whimpered underneath him at the sensation of being filled so much and so quickly. He clenched around Kevin which forced another choked moan, and reached up to pull him down before he got too weak and fell on top of him. Kevin twitched inside of Chiron, letting out small sounds as he emptied himself into him. He was breathing hard, his sweat covering his stomach in a thin layer along with the rest of his body. They laid there in silence for what seemed like a long time. Kevin’s voice interrupted.
“Mmm…damn.” He said gently pulling himself out. He rolled off of Chiron, wrapping an arm around to bring him too. Chiron was flush against his chest, breathing normally again.
“Chiron that was…” Kevin said letting out a huge breath. Chiron weakly chuckled.
“If this is how it’ll be, I’ll never speak again.” He mumbled.
“Man, shut up,” Kevin chuckled softly, “You’d be gettin' it anyway.” They both laughed, Kevin wiping the sand off of Chiron’s back, dusting him off until they fell asleep under the stars, traces of dawn making its appearance.
*********
“Yo, Black, you good?” Kevin called into the dark room. Chiron was on his back but he started quickly, hearing Kevin’s voice. He turned around so he wouldn’t see his erection and laid on his side, blankets covering him.
“Yeah.” Chiron said, voice cracking. Kevin smiled before starting to close the door, unaware of Chiron’s jumpiness.
“If you need anything, I’m right down the hall.” He said before shutting the door, leaving Chiron with his thoughts again. As if that worked out the first time. Chiron groaned and tried to will his ‘friend’ away. Now was certainly not the time. He heard, Kevin’s room door close and he sighed before closing his eyes.
“Shit.” He said aloud. What had he gotten himself into?

Chapter Text

When Chiron woke up, it wasn’t because of a bad dream. It wasn’t because of a good one either, the kind that would leave him sticky and lifeless as if he’d been doing it while he was awake. He woke up because he smelled…pancakes. He blinked a few times before actually sitting up in bed. He sighed, throwing the covers off of him. The room was bright in the best way. Sunlight flooded in, warmed Chiron up. He hesitated slightly going down the hall. He didn’t know why. Maybe it was because he wasn’t used to it. Yeah, that had to be it. He stood up and stretched, pulling muscles taut before putting on his discarded wife beater. He opened the door to meet the intoxicating smell face to face.

When he entered the kitchen, he saw Kevin in a plain white shirt, with red plaid pajama bottoms, flipping the fluffiest pancakes Chiron had ever seen. His stomach growled in appreciation. The view was nice too. He started to feel a tinge of sadness that he’d have to be leaving tomorrow morning. He licked his lips before clearing his throat. Kevin turned around, offering his billion dollar smile.

“Aye, what’s up, Black? You sleep a’ight?” He asked, taking out two plates. He gracefully put the first set of pancakes on them before moving to the remaining batter, pouring into the pan. Chiron watched in awe. Kevin, not hearing a response turned back and watched Chiron eye the food.

“Chiron,” he repeated. He watched dark eyes snap to his own and he laughed. “You sleep good last night, man?” Chiron shook his head rapidly, embarrassed that he was too focused on the food to pay attention.

“No, yeah, I slept great. Thanks for having me, Kev.” He said smiling, eyes fluttering down like they always did. Kevin nodded, chuckling.

“You look like you tryna tear this food up.” He said. Chiron looked up. “You always got jokes, man.”

Kevin smiled. “Didn’t I tell you I was a part time comedian?” he said, smile getting bigger when Chiron looked up, questioning yet skeptical with his eyes like he always did.

“Nah. I’m just fuckin witchu, man.” Kevin said before letting out a loud laugh. The sound was beautiful to Chiron. He wished he could make him laugh like that all day. Laugh until he was clutching his stomach and clapping his hands in that way of his.

“Sit down, though. Food will be ready in a minute, I promise.” He said to Chiron, gesturing with his eyes for him to take a seat. Chiron grabbed a chair and sat down.

“Actually, you know what, Kev, I uh…gotta go brush my teeth first.” Chiron said getting up. “You ain’t got no spare toothbrush by any chance do you?” he said fidgeting. He should’ve remembered his.

“Yeah of course. I always buy a spare for lil man whenever he comes over. Should be in the bathroom cabinet. Hope you don’t mind dinosaurs and shit.” He said chuckling. Chiron walked out of the kitchen and into the bathroom, making sure to look in the mirror and eliminate any possible imperfections. He washed his face with cold water, jolting himself awake. He looked in the cabinet and grabbed the toothbrush, ripping it out of its package. Kevin was singing in the kitchen and the clatter of pots on the stove comforted Chiron. Sounds he missed as a child. Sounds that made a house feel like a home. He quickly brushed his teeth and rinsed off his new T-Rex toothbrush, tossing it on his bed as he made his way back into the kitchen.

“You know what, Chiron? It feels good to be waking up with someone in the morning.” Kevin said taking out the maple syrup and the orange juice. He placed it on the table and walked back to the stove, turning it off, sliding the last of the pancakes onto the two plates. Three for each. Chiron felt his heart skip a beat a little. Kevin liked having him here? He retook his seat at the table and drummed his fingers on it, nodding at Kevin to continue.

“It gets lonely out here sometimes, man. Especially when I don’t have lil’ man around. I don’t get to see him often anyway.” He said sliding in the seat across from Chiron, handing him his plate. He also handed him a knife and fork, tucked neatly in a napkin. Chiron was impressed.

“You real fancy, huh?” he said lifting up the napkin. Kevin looked at him before starting to chuckle.

“Yeah, whatchu thought, Black?” he said unwrapping his fork and knife. Chiron toyed with him a little more.

“I eat my pancakes wit a spoon.” He said putting the napkin down. Kevin looked up from his fork, about to take a bite. He put it down and gave Chiron a look, eyebrows raised.

“You eat pancakes with a spoon, nigga?” he asked. Chiron kept the serious face on. Kevin sighed and got up. “That’s the first time I heard some shit like that.” He said shaking his head. Chiron laughed, shaking his head.

“Don’t judge me, man. You don’t know my shit.” He playfully retorted. Kevin huffed in fake annoyance.

“I’ll stop judging you when you learn to eat pancakes with a fork and knife like everybody else.” He rifled through the utensils.

“I’m just fuckin’ witchu, Kev.” He said, starting to cut his pancakes. Kevin sucked his teeth.

“You still a smartass, huh? Quiet but with the smallest hint of playful. That was always who you were.” Kevin said quietly coming back to his seat, he shook his head and nodded at Chiron’s plate, still untouched except for the cut he started making.

“Go on, Black.” He said encouraging him. “I ain’t poison it, or nothin’.” He smiled and Chiron shot him one back.

“You on one.” He said before cutting his pancakes all the way.

He watched Chiron take his first bite. Watched his eyes widen the slightest bit as he gave his nod of approval. Watched his throat move as he swallowed and moaned in delight.

“Good shit.” He said looking at Kevin, whose mouth was suddenly dry. Kevin cleared his throat and plastered on a smile.

“Of course it is. It’s my cookin’ ain’t it?” he said diving into his own plate, trying to distract himself. It was hard to though, seeing Chiron’s shoulder muscles always moving, arm looking like it was constantly flexed. He had to control himself and chill for a minute. He didn’t want to fuck anything up but damn, it was hard when all he wanted to do was shove the pancakes aside and have Chiron go down on him like he did with the pancakes.

“You got work, today, Kev?” Chiron asked, starting his second pancake. Kevin blinked twice before he could process what Chiron was saying.

“Uh, nah. I got the day off. I can tell Julio and Ana to lock up tonight.” He said pushing his plate away. He’d only eaten one pancake and he was stuffed. He had his appetite on other things, things like Chiron’s thighs, his stomach, neck, his length... He shook off the thoughts, scolding himself for not having more control. He got up and trashed his last pancakes, putting his plate in the sink. Chiron protested angrily.

“Wasting good food right there, Kev.” he said, shoveling the last half of the pancake down. Kevin rubbed his stomach.

“I was just full, Black. That’s all.” He said. Chiron rolled his eyes, getting up from the table and putting his plate in the sink to wash it. He washed Kevin’s plate too before shutting the cabinets and putting the maple syrup away along with the orange juice.

“Wasn’t you the one complaining about some tea last night, though?” Chiron said bumping into Kevin’s shoulder, laughing.

“Watch it.” He said pushing him back and making his way to the bedroom. “I slaved over that shit for you.” He called over his shoulder. Chiron smirked.
Chiron fiddled with his fingers again and ventured back into his bedroom. He fixed his bed and arranged his pillows immaculately. He sat on the bed and laid back sighing. Two seconds later, Kevin came into the room, towel hanging low.

“Hey, man, you haven’t seen my comb around here, have you? I usually bring it in here because the mirror is better than the one in my room.”
Chiron was mesmerized. Kevin completely did this on purpose. The towel was just low enough to reveal the beginning of his V line, the light trail of hair from his bellybutton tempting Chiron to fantasize about nasty things. He licked his lips absentmindedly, propping himself up to get a better view.

“…Nah, Kev… I ain’t seen it.” Chiron said lying back down. He had to take some breaths until he heard Kevin softly pad out of the room. He wasn’t the only one feeling the tension was he? Kevin had to be feeling it too.

*******
After both the men were showered, they decided not to take the car and go for an old fashion walk. Chiron hadn’t been running or exercising lately and Kevin decided that it would make room for more conversation.

“Chiron, Chiron, Chiron.” He said shaking his head and wincing against the heat. “Where do I even start with you, man?” he looked at Chiron waiting for his expressionless face to reveal something. When it didn’t, he kept talking.

“There’s so many things that I never got to know about you.” He said stopping under a tree for some temporary relief. Chiron shrugged. He was starting to shut Kevin out. He didn’t like getting emotional, didn’t like opening up. Emotions only led you down one path and that was destruction. Even if it was all good at first, heartbreak seemed inevitable. Chiron would pass up the opportunity gladly whenever he got the chance. Kevin really stared into him this time, trying to pull an answer out of him.

“Am I sayin’ somethin’ wrong, Black?” Kevin asked. It was so earnest, so caring that Chiron couldn’t help but feel ashamed for treating Kevin the way that he did.

“Nah, Kev. I uh, I’m sorry man. It’s just a lot of shit you don’t wanna know.” Chiron said, taking a step away from the shade to continue walking. Kevin followed, silent, trying to find a way to veer the conversation into something less…bad? He never really started a topic an Chiron had his guard up. Chiron confused him.

“I uh… heard that Paula’s getting better.” Kevin said, patting Chiron’s back, encouragingly. “That must make you feel real good.”

“Can’t really be too happy about it because of the… nightmares I have sometimes…a lot of times.” Chiron said, ducking under a particularly saggy branch. Kevin looked confused.

“Nightmares? Aye, uh, I didn’t know, about that man, I’m...” Kevin said grimacing, kicking himself. Paula of all people, was the worst person to talk about. He felt like he was cornering Chiron and forcing him to tell his secrets, and that wasn’t fair. “Listen, we can walk in silence if you want, just enjoy the nature, maybe pick up a movie and kick it when we get home.” Kevin said. Chiron kept walking, confirming Kevin’s suggested plans.

They walked through a park, engaging all of their senses. Delighted shrieks of children and dogs barking playfully at other dogs, was a missed sound by Chiron. He didn’t really get to have the chance to just walk around and take everything in. The trap life had a rigid schedule. Had to do everything on time, in a certain way or he could fuck something up, get himself or someone hurt. Hands in pocket, he walked. He liked walking with Kevin. Actually, he loved it. Had to be in his company to feel good, like a drug. Being back in Miami was different. When Chiron was little, it was a big place to be feared, a place where no one accepted who he was. Not a lot has changed but he definitely wasn’t scared now. He could handle anything.

He turned to look at Kevin. He was so kind, so understanding. Chiron still had to pinch himself to make him believe that he was really with this beautiful man. He wished that he could truly show him how he felt, like in the dream that often haunted him, but something just...made him afraid. Just then, a soft breeze made itself welcome in the scorching Miami heat and Chiron let his head back, so that it could caress his neck, which started to moisten. He heard Kevin sigh in relief.

“Breeze is nice. It’s hotter than a mug out here.” Chiron offered, making Kevin chuckle softly in agreement.

“Ain’t that the truth?” Kevin replied, wiping at his neck with the back of his hand. “Maybe we should’ve taken that car after all, huh, Black?” He laughed to himself. Chiron smiled.

“Yeah, maybe we should’ve of.” He said.

“You wanna stop for lunch somewhere?” Kevin asked Chiron. He got a nod in return. “Any idea where?” he pressed.

“Ion know man, anywhere with a burger is good.” Chiron shrugged, pointing to a burger joint past the few shopping outlets they saw. “How ‘bout over there?” Kevin nodded in agreement and they crossed the street, watching cars bump the latest rap music and seeing other men shout their salutations to the others. Women walked, children trailing loosely behind while they picked up rocks and threw them at the passing cars. Shouts of annoyance rang in the air, causing the mothers to shoot a look behind them, trying to find if their child were the culprit. Chiron smiled to himself, remembering when Teresa would bring him to the corner store to buy light groceries. He had to visit her before he left for Atlanta again. If Chiron behaved, which he always did, the trip would end with ice cream and some pocket change. When they got home, Juan would laugh, seeing Chiron who was known as “Little” at the time, covered in ice-cream. He’d grab him by his waist and clean his mouth and hands off, jokingly saying, “Don’ speak much, but you can sure get yourself sticky, Little.” Juan would then shove his hands in his own pockets and make Chiron pick a hand, giving him whatever bill he pulled out. On rare occasions, Chiron got as much as fifty. He’d give a small smile and put the money in his pocket, sitting next to Juan to watch whatever was on as Teresa cooked. Often times, he’d find himself nodding off. When Juan noticed, he’d pull Chiron in closer and let him sleep. Chiron was still iffy about being touched too much but whenever Juan pulled him close, it made him want to sleep for a thousand years. He couldn’t sleep much at home anyway, with his mother laughing loudly with the men she brought home, things clattering and ringing. Sleep evaded him most nights, tip-toeing when it was time to be awake. That was the worst part.

Kevin grabbed Chiron’s arm and led them to a table. “You day-dreamin’ on me, Black.” He chuckled. Chiron let himself be led and they sat down at the table for two. The food joint was slow, with only three other customers eating there. Chiron took a deep breath. The place was cool, air conditioning making their skin rise up into bumps.

“Hopefully the food is good, here.” Kevin said grabbing a menu. “Think they just put this place up a few months ago.”

“Can’t no one mess up a burger.” Chiron said. Kevin raised his eyebrow.

“Is that so? Guess you’ve never been to MaryAnn’s then, Black. That woman can’t make ice.” He said in a hushed tone behind his menu. Chiron laughed, throwing his head back and putting his menu down. Kevin followed along with him.

“Damn…that bad, huh?” he asked in between chuckles. Kevin nodded.

“That bad. Probably worse.” Kevin said shaking his head in disgust. Chiron widened his eyes.

“Ah man, that’s crazy.” Chiron said, still chuckling. Just then a waiter came over, pen and notepad in hand. She looked unusually happy, something in waiters that always unnerved Chiron.

“Hello, my name is Patricia and I’ll be serving you gentlemen today. May I take your orders?” she asked looking at both men.

“Uh yeah, may I just get a steak and cheese with some fries please?” Kevin asked. The waiter nodded.

“Anything to drink?” she asked leaning to one side.

“Just a water, please.” Kevin said. She nodded before turning to Chiron.

“What would you like?” she asked, smiling at Chiron.

“Just a burger wit fries, thanks. Water for a drink.” He nodded, putting the menu down. She wrote everything down and perked up a little.

“Comin’ right up, cutie.” She said, throwing in a smile and a wink. Kevin gave her a look as she walked away.

“Mm. Chiron, she wants some, man.” he said smiling. “Whatchu gon’ do, player?” he said leaning in and giving him a fake smile. Chiron sucked his teeth, leaning away.

“Nothin’.” He said drumming on the table and looking away. Kevin leaned back too, doing his own drumming. He didn’t like the waiter. Trying to come onto Chiron. He felt anger bubbling up in his chest but he had to cool down and remember that Chiron didn’t want her. She was probably one of the hundreds of women who wanted him. Wanted to feel his weight against them, pushing and pulling and bringing them down the road to ecstasy and intimacy. Kevin swallowed, shifting in his seat. How badly he wanted to let Chiron experience something he hasn’t in over a decade. Wanted to let him experience his touch and his only, the push and pull of his hips, make his sweaty body shake in pleasure. He thought of Chiron leaving tomorrow morning, opportunity going with him. Kevin had to act fast. Had to let Chiron know how he felt.
They sat in silence for about ten more minutes before the waiter came back with their food. She lingered at Chiron’s side, leaning down extra low to reveal her cleavage, uniform freshly unbuttoned. She smiled at him again and Kevin cleared his throat.

“Thanks.” He said nodding his head, mouth set in a straight line. She got up quickly, giving an embarrassed giggle before telling the men to enjoy their food.

“Man…” Chiron said shaking his head before taking a bite into his burger. He nodded in approval. “This is good, man. Told you they couldn’t mess it up.” Kevin pointed at his own food.

“Nah, this jawn right here…that’s good.” He said pointing to his steak and cheese sub. He put his sandwich down after another bite and wiped his hands on the napkin at the table. “So, uh, what’re your plans from here on out, man?” he asked. He was really hoping Chiron didn’t mention leaving. He wanted him there but it would take a miracle for Chiron to stay. He was a man of his word. If he planned to do something, he’d do it.

“I gotta leave tomorrow. But I plan on visiting Teresa on my way back.” He said. Kevin winced at the thought of waking up the day after Chiron leaves, to an empty house, a long workday awaiting him. Hopefully he could accomplish something with Chiron, get something done. Something that would let him know how he felt.

“I wish you could stay man, I like the company.” Kevin said sighing and staring at his water. Chiron felt his heart flutter.

“I know, Kev but I gotta get back, man. I got things that won’t handle themselves over there.” He said looking down at his burger. He took another bite before calling the waitress over for a to-go bag. She gave him another smile, this time a mischievous one and went to go get the bill. Chiron pulled out his wallet. Kevin intercepted and shook his head.

“I got it, Black. You’re my guest.” He said pulling out thirty dollars and putting it in the folder containing the check. The woman came back with the to-go bag and wished the gentlemen a nice day. Chiron started to put his burger in the paper bag but when he opened it even more, he noticed a white piece of paper in it. He pulled it out and it was the waitress’ number and her name. Patricia. In parentheses she put "Patty." He sucked his teeth, trashing the paper on the way out, looking over to Kevin to see if he noticed. He didn’t. He was too busy looking over his phone. He held the door for Chiron and they walked together to go see about a movie they could rent.

Chapter Text

The day was coming to an end, Chiron and Kevin satisfied with the day’s activities. They went to the nearest shop and bought a movie for cheap. It was a comedy, however, Kevin didn’t plan on paying much attention to it. It was just a way to get closer to Chiron, be able to feel his warmth, take in his beauty, his cologne, which made Kevin’s mouth water whenever he walked by.

Kevin walked through the gates, holding the door for Chiron. He thanked him and they continued into the apartment, Kevin sighing and kicking off his shoes.

“Man, I have never walked so much in my life.” He said throwing the movie onto the kitchen table.

“Don’t you walk everywhere else, bruh?” Chiron inquired. “That should’ve been nothing to you.” Kevin rolled his eyes, unbuttoning his shirt.

“Yeah I walk, but I take the bus too, Black. Today was nice though. I had fun.” He smiled at Chiron, taking off the shirt and just staying in his wife beater. “I thought was gon’ melt though, forreal.” He said fanning himself with the shirt and walking to his bedroom.

Chiron sauntered into the living room, taking the movie with him. He let himself sag into the couch and rubbed his face over with his hands. He sighed and stared at the blank television in front of him, waiting for Kevin to come back so they could start. Chiron was actually looking forward to it. Hearing Kevin’s soothing voice, listening to his laughter and
light touches.

Oh, Kevin! Always making him shiver in appreciation, sending electricity and lust through his veins. Always being so damn sexy without ever knowing it. Chiron hated him for that. He hated how Kevin made him feel like a school boy, constantly fighting urges, fighting steamy images that came to mind whenever he did something. It could’ve been something as simple as a lip bite and it would send Chiron’s mind into overdrive, coming up with a hundred different things that he could do with Kevin’s lips. Chiron sighed again, clenching his jaw. Damn, he had it bad.

Kevin walked in again, light gray sweatpants on with a plain white tee. He looked at Chiron.

“Those clothes are too heavy to be wearing in Miami, man, especially tonight. If you thought today was bad, wait till it hits midnight or so. Temp’s supposed to be one of the hottest this year.” He shook his head and sat down, fidgeting with the movie. “I’ll wait for you to change, Black. Get this movie set up.” They both got up, Chiron heading to the bedroom, Kevin for the television.

When Chiron got to the bedroom, he rifled through his duffel, grabbing a black, plain t-shirt. He dropped his jeans and traded for the same sweats he had on the night before. Sweats were still hot to Chiron but he hadn’t packed any shorts. Probably wouldn’t wear them anyway.

He went back out into the living room, which was darkened, the beginning of the movie on pause. Kevin smiled warmly and patted the spot next to the couch. “Come on, Black, right here, man.”

Chiron sat down and leaned back, knees touching Kevin’s. He noticed that Kevin had the two other pieces that completed the couch set, but he wanted Chiron next to him. He smiled to himself while Kevin played the movie. This could be an interesting evening, if fate took over. Chiron pleaded that she would.
***
Thirty minutes into the movie, Chiron started to doze off, head constantly jerking back and forth. Kevin noticed and with a small smile said, “Go on, Black. I understand if you tired.” Chiron shook his head.

“Nah man, I’m good.” He cleared his throat and adjusted himself on the couch determined to stay awake. “It’s just the heat.” Kevin still stared, not believing him.

“I know you probably have to leave early tomorrow morning. It’s getting late.” Kevin said, trying to figure out where he wanted to go with what he was saying. He had to let Chiron know that he wanted him, maybe even needed him. He couldn’t let him go without a fight.

“Yeah, but I’m cool, Kev.” Chiron said, protesting when Kevin paused the movie. “I’m fine, don’ trip.” He rubbed his forehead with four fingers and scratched his arm absentmindedly, waiting for Kevin to respond.

Kevin sucked his teeth and sighed. He had to be blunt with Chiron. Just tell him how he felt.

“Chiron, listen…I don’t want you to leave, man…” Kevin said turning to face him. Chiron got wide awake then, sitting up straight to meet determined, fiery eyes. His fear made him try and find excuses.

“I mean…I enjoyed the stay, Kev but… you know, the trap life don’t stop man, never take a break…” he said moving his arms in an explanatory manner. Kevin rolled his eyes.

“That’s bullshit, man.” he said shaking his head. “I… ion know how to say this but…I want you, Chiron. I need you. Seeing you after all those years made me question how I stayed sane without you. Made me realize how much I miss you, appreciate you for showing me who I was. I was dumb back then, only looking for ‘bitches’ to hit and quit. But you Chiron, you were different. For the first time in a long time…you made me want to stay… and I don’t know what to do about this feeling you give me. Your eyes, your lips, your body… you just drive me crazy.” He finished. Chiron was looking down at this point, taking all the information in. He didn’t know what to say, or how to say anything at that point.

“Kev…” he began. Kevin quickly interrupted.

“Don’t say anything, Black. You don’t have to.”

“I…want you too.” Chiron pressed on. He knew that Kevin was fearful of rejection, and he wanted to prove to him how much he meant. Kevin looked up, eyes heavy. “I feel…stuck when I think of you, Kev. Stuck in this feelin’ that for some reason, I’ll never be good enough, what you need…” he said. He still wasn’t looking into Kevin’s eyes, afraid of what he’d find there. Kevin instinctively moved closer, wrapped his arms around Chiron, who was shaking, something Kevin wouldn’t have noticed if the moment didn’t heighten all his senses

“Chiron…” he sighed, “You have no idea how badly I needed you to say that, man.” He tightened his hold on Chiron, running timid hands on the strong back. The movie had stopped playing completely by then when it had been stuck on pause for too long. The blue screen was illuminating the rough skin of the men, mingled, while quiet sighs and sniffles filled the air.

It was Kevin who pulled away first. Quietly, he gazed into Chiron’s glossy eyes, hand moved to his neck, feeling his heartbeat drum wildly, begging for release. When Chiron began to look down, Kevin’s gaze too much for him to bear, he was stopped by reassuring hands, bringing his face back up.

“Come ‘ere,” Kevin whispered, eyes flickering to Chiron’s lips. He obliged, leaning in to meet Kevin’s hungry, soft mouth. It was slow, tentative, but there was a fire burning inside of Chiron, desperate waves crashing against him wanting more and more of Kevin. His hand went up to grab Kevin’s shirt, grasping it, not letting go, in fear that he would open his eyes and it would all be gone. He sighed in content, mouth slipping open, Kevin taking the opportunity to slip his tongue in and explore. Explore the beautiful place where Chiron sparingly let words flow from. He groaned low in his throat, grabbing Chiron by the neck to steady him, bring him closer, keep him there.

Chiron moaned softly before pulling away, resting his head on Kevin’s neck, panting, t-shirt still grasped firmly in his hand. Chiron’s hot breath against Kevin’s neck drove him crazy. It made Kevin want to throw Chiron against the couch and take him there, make him beg for more of Kevin to fill him up, devour him, claim him. He felt soft kisses being planted across his throat, his Adam’s apple, light suction near the jugular vein while he was lost in thought. He let out another moan before pushing softly against Chiron to no avail. Now that Chiron had what he wanted, he wasn’t going to let up. Kevin felt himself harden at the feeling, little puffs of breath escaping his lips.

“Chi…ah…my…bedroom…” Kevin said breathlessly, pushing against Chiron again. He felt the suction let up and Chiron looked at him through hooded eyelids and swollen lips. Kevin growled, standing up and pulling Chiron with him, stumbling to the bedroom, drunk off of lust and pent up desire.
When they got there, Kevin’s bed was in comfortable disarray, the soft color of the room putting Chiron at ease. He was pushed onto the bed, Kevin quickly climbing on top, kissing his neck, behind his ear and letting his hands roam over Chiron’s body. He moaned, feeling himself harden, the fire in his stomach sparking.

“Shit,” Kevin said, feeling Chiron’s member underneath him. He looked at Chiron, lips glistening and spread apart, panting, eyes on fire. “That’s what you packin’, huh?” He whispered, grinding down experimentally. Chiron arched, sucking in a sharp breath. Kevin did it again and Chiron groaned, pulling the sheets. Kevin leaned down to kiss him again, making sure to press against Chiron’s hard length. He hissed to himself at how good it felt. Chiron spread his legs, hand travelling down his body and into his sweats to take hold of himself. Kevin growled, taking his hand away.

“Nah, Black, you all mine now. I’m gon’ take my time.” He said, lifting Chiron’s shirt up taking the opportunity to let his eyes and hands wander. “Damn…” he says, letting his fingernails lightly scratch across Chiron’s nipples.

Chiron lets out a breath, feels his face and neck get hot, embarrassed even though Kevin is admiring him. Everything is hot, heart running so fast, he thinks it might burst out of his chest. Kevin swallows, his chain dangling from his neck as he stares. Chiron wants to grab him, kiss him again, and move against him. Anything to get the burning feeling that felt so good.

“Kevin…” he says and moves his hips. Kevin looks at him, as if lost in a trance, then realizing what Chiron wanted, chuckles.

“I know whatchu want, Black, and Ima give it to you, don’t worry.” He says while slipping confident fingers into Chiron’s waistband, pulling teasingly.

“Come on, Kev, stop teasin’ me.” Chiron says, clenching fingers impatiently. He lifts his hips up as a sign to Kevin to take everything off which Kevin does. Chiron sits up and takes off his shirt while Kevin does the same. He exhales, abdomen contracting, making Kevin bite his lip all over again.

Kevin takes ahold of Chiron’s member, making the beautiful man underneath him throw his head back in pleasure. He takes his time stroking Chiron, making it so torturous that Chiron doesn’t know whether to cry or to curse.

“That feel good? Huh, Chiron?” Kevin asks softly, drinking up Chiron’s expressions. Every little movement he made fired Kevin up. The pull and arch of his hard, black body, the small sighs, the shifting of his hips to let Kevin know that he needed him to extinguish the fire that was slowly consuming him. Everything.

“Ah…” Chiron hisses, “Whatchu think?” Kevin smiles continuing his slow strokes, leaning down to capture Chiron’s lips in another kiss. Chiron claws softly at this back, bucking into Kevin’s touch. Kevin lets him go and spreads Chiron’s legs, leaning into his ear to whisper.

“You sure you want this, Black?” he asks, kissing his neck to punctuate his question.

Chiron looks up, unable to keep his eyes off of Kevin’s lips and throat, wanting to suck and leave marks so the world knew who he belonged to. He nods and Kevin, noticing his stares, chuckles and kisses him again. He reaches into his bedside drawer and pulls out the lubricant, squeezing it into his hand. Chiron, still a bit breathless watches his every move, not believing that Kevin was going to be his first. The first to claim him in such an intimate way, full of love, full passion, full of raw want. Kevin slips one finger in, quickly making it two and then three. Chiron hisses at the third one so Kevin takes his time, lets Chiron get the hang of it, catch his breath.
Chiron finally nods at Kevin, giving him the green light to do what he’s wanted ever since they first sat at the beach, hot skin and smooth fingers patiently drawing out soft whimpers and heated breaths.

Kevin lies in between Chiron’s legs, his chain once again dangling, lightly running over his chest. Chiron whimpers and when Kevin looks down in between their bodies, he realizes that Chiron was leaking with anticipation, holding on for Kevin’s first move. It makes him want to come right there.

“I gotchu, Black…” he said softly, “Don’t worry.” He positioned himself at Chiron’s entrance and pushed in slowly, taking in Chiron’s beautiful sounds.
Chiron sucked in a breath and bites his lip, arching a bit at the pain, his throat gorgeously exposed. Kevin kisses him and pauses, waiting for Chiron to let him know when it was alright again.

Gradually, Chiron relaxed around him and Kevin slid in deeper, moaning at the wet heat surrounding him.

“Shit…” Kevin sighed, finally all the way in. Chiron grabs at his back feverishly when he feels Kevin wrap his hand around him once more, slow thrusts and fast strokes.

“Kev, I…” Chiron began, gasping. Kevin planted sloppy kisses on his chest.

“You close? You gon’ come, Chiron?” Kevin asked, slightly picking up his speed. “Hmm?” he asks again rolling his hips while he thrusts. Kevin throws his head back, on fire, burning because of Chiron. Chiron nods, mouth open, eyes closed tightly, small moans pouring out. His chest rising and falling with the quick breaths that he takes. Kevin was shaking above him, his hips being pulled and pushed back into Chiron as if possessed. He lets his face fall onto Chiron’s collarbone, trying but failing to stifle the sounds he makes as he loses control. His hips stutter and he stops to jerk Chiron off.

“Come on, Chiron. It’s okay to come.” he says softly, slamming his hips against Chiron’s body again. He earns a particularly loud groan from that and when Chiron starts to shake, muscles tightening beautifully, Kevin knows that he is going to come any second. He kisses his jawbone, feeling Chiron clench it and suddenly he was being pulled closer, his hand having to come out from stroking Chiron to support himself on the bed.

His thrusts were downright messy and Chiron gives a shout, biting down and breathing through his nose roughly before Kevin feels the sticky heat hitting his stomach. He keeps on going and Chiron twitches under him, still emptying himself out. Before he knows it, Kevin is coming too, gasping from the force of his orgasm. Chiron groans softly at the sensation, arching for a second before falling limp under Kevin, who kisses his parted lips before slowly pulling out. Chiron whimpers and Kevin falls beside him, quickly pulling him closer, letting Chiron’s breath ghost over his neck again.

“Chiron…” he sighs, feeling his eyelids get heavy.

“Hmm.” Chiron replies, still buzzing all over, fire finally put out.

Kevin rolls over, getting out of bed and getting a protest from Chiron. He disappears into the bathroom before coming out with a wet towel. He sits on the bed and gently cleans Chiron off, who was quickly dozing off.

“Damn, Black…” he says softly, as he cleans off Chiron’s stomach, watching as his breath evened out.

Chiron, lost to the world, only turns his head to one side, giving a small mumble in response. Kevin cleans himself off and goes back into the bathroom before returning to Chiron. He comes in from behind, the minor disturbance causing Chiron to turn around to face Kevin, head against his chest. In that moment, the world didn’t matter. Nothing mattered to Kevin as he held Chiron tightly, his heartbeat thundering in his ears. The world could end that same night and it’d find them entangled in each other’s arms.

Chapter Text

Kevin woke up burning, on fire…and it wasn’t because of the predicted weather. It was Chiron. He was burning up, sweating and shaking. Kevin, still disoriented laid still to try and assess the situation but it became evident quickly as to what was wrong. Chiron was having a nightmare.
He was panting, clutching onto his pillow, small noises from the back of his throat escaping his lips. Kevin, arms still wrapped around Chiron, ran his hands down his chest, his stomach, soothing him.

“Chiron,” he called out, still rubbing his hand down to his stomach, where he paused, “Chiron, wake up. It’s a’ight, I gotchu. Come on, man.” When his groggy attempts didn’t work, Kevin sat up, kicking his legs out of bed and putting on the sweatpants that had been tossed with reckless abandon just hours earlier. He left the bedroom to get a glass of water for Chiron, coming back to set it on the drawer beside him. Kevin reached out to touch Chiron, lightly shake him to help him escape the dark atmosphere that tightly gripped him. Before he could even touch him however, Chiron was shooting up, wheezing, instinctively feeling behind him for Kevin, who was ready, hands up to comfort him.

“Aye, man. You was just havin’ a nightmare.” He said, taking his time to sit on the bed next to Chiron. Beads of sweat raced down his neck, disappearing into his collarbone. He wiped them off harshly before throwing the covers off of his still naked body.

“Chiron, it’s okay…here.” Kevin offered, grabbing the water quickly off of the drawer. “Drink,” he said when Chiron pushed the glass away. Kevin held Chiron’s arm down and put the cup to his lips, eyes filled with concern. More sternly, “Drink. You damn near sweat everything out. You're not dyin' of dehydration on my watch.” Chiron does, taking three gulps before pushing the glass away from him again. Kevin grabbed a towel from the bathroom and came back to dab Chiron’s face and neck with it, eventually moving to his back. Chiron sighed and Kevin’s heart broke at how tired he looked, nightmares taking away a comfort, a way to escape life’s realities.

Chiron didn’t talk about it, and Kevin didn’t ask. His only task was to make sure Chiron was alright. He’d share if he wanted to, but for now, the content remained kept away.
When everything was put away and Kevin slid into bed beside Chiron again, he was putting his sweats back on. After Chiron did that, he remained seated, fiddling with his thumbs.

“Chiron,” Kevin said softly. He reached out, pulling Chiron’s arm, heavy body giving in easily, head meeting chest once more. Tense. Kevin closed his eyes, made his hands chase away the tension from Chiron’s muscles but they were unwilling, guests who overstayed their welcome. Chiron let out a heavy breath.

“Thanks, Kev…” Chiron began. Kevin shushed him, kissing his forehead lightly.

No one was ever there to help Chiron. Whenever he’d wake up, breaking free from the grasp of a nightmare at last, he’d wake to darkness and heat, a lonely, drug-filled day awaiting. When he dipped his face in ice water, he desperately wished the pain away, hoping it would numb him. Not permanently, but just so he didn’t have to bear the weight of loneliness so often. With Kevin by his side, the weight already seems lighter.

Kevin didn’t sleep that night.

***
When Chiron woke up again, he felt well rested considering everything else. Strong arms were still wrapped around his moist torso. He shifted, wanting to face Kevin again because they had changed positions overnight. He didn’t want to leave the bed. He didn’t want to leave Kevin either, but something about being so exposed, so vulnerable scared him, stunned him into a silence. He didn’t want Kevin to think he was weak.

“You awake, Black?” Kevin asked, squeezing a bit tighter before letting go and turning around to stretch. Silence. Kevin looked over at the clock. It had only just turned six. He took a deep breath, wondering if he could pull off letting Ana and Julio closing the diner again. Probably not.

“Chiron, it’s okay…to be scared, you know? It’s me.” he said sitting up. “You want something to eat? Drink?” he continued, sighing when he still didn’t get a response. Chiron got up from the bed, walking out of the room and into the bathroom. Kevin could hear the water running, Chiron brushing his teeth. Kevin threw the cover off of himself and padded into the bathroom, trailing behind him.

He found Chiron staring at himself in the mirror, eyes snapping to Kevin in panic when they met. Before he could find a way out of the bathroom, Kevin wrapped his arms around him for what seemed like the hundredth time to Chiron, not that he was complaining. Kevin kissed his spine, each shoulder, and the back of his neck, rubbing his chest with soft palms. When he looked up to meet Chiron’s reflection in the mirror again, he was crying, tears rushing down his face to meet their demise in the sink. Kevin spun him around, forcing him to meet his gaze.

“Listen, Chiron, I’m real. Your nightmares, your fears…they may feel real, in fact, incredibly real but they’re not. I’m here for you, lean on me when you can’t, Black. I gotchu. I do.” He said grabbing Chiron by the waist. He wished somehow his words could penetrate through his mind, instantly making him forget all the pain, all the trouble, the heartache, but he knew that it would take time. Maybe a lot of time, but he was willing to be there every step of the way, until the nightmares faded into nothing but sweet dreams. Chiron nodded, finally responding to something.

“I know, Kev.” Chiron said, voice cracking. “I know.”

“Stay with me a little longer, Chiron.” Kevin said. “I need you, Black.”

Light kisses raining on Chiron’s shoulder, he forgets about his reality. Forgets about his nightmares, just for a quick minute, but a minute seems like years at this point. For now, he’ll stay in this dream with Kevin, hoping that he’ll never have to wake up.

“I will.” He says, bending down to greet soft lips.

Chapter Text

Chiron is staying, but first he has to leave, has to get things settled back in Atlanta. It was Wednesday morning, but he planned to go Friday afternoon. He doesn’t know how long he’ll be staying for, but he’s sure that it’ll be for a while. There’s just something about staying with Kevin that makes him comfortable, willing do it for a long time. He’s not looking forward to the almost ten hour drive he has to make back to Miami. It’s too much time for him to think, maybe convince himself otherwise. He needs two days in Atlanta though, to figure everything out. Two days away from Kevin.

Kevin was due back at work in a few hours. He had to be there by eleven. It just turned seven thirty. Chiron was back in Kevin’s bed, drained from his nightmare, drained from struggling to keep his feelings in. When he finally got them out, Kevin was still there. He hadn’t left. He held onto Chiron with all he had and Chiron loved him even more for that. Kevin was lying next to him, facing up, hand on his stomach.

“You hungry, Black?” he asks, while lightly drumming on the bed. For some reason he doubted that Chiron was happy about giving himself away, obviously he wasn’t, but Kevin just hoped that Chiron trusted him. Trusted him enough to be vulnerable. To break away from being the “hard” man that he had to grow up to be.

“Nah, man…” Chiron says sighing. He’s facing away from Kevin, suddenly cold without his arms around him. He wishes Kevin would take him in his arms, hold him close and just forget about the world. He couldn’t help feeling a tinge of anguish knowing Kevin would be leaving him soon. He decided that he would take the time, visit Teresa and see how she was doing. He couldn’t wait to see her, catch up.

“You sure?” Kevin says, voice gliding through the silence. Chiron wanted to melt into Kevin’s soft voice. It was so soothing, so velvety smooth but with a hint of something else that Chiron couldn’t put his finger on. He decides to be the brave one and turn around to face Kevin.

“Yeah. I’m sure. I know you got work in a few, Kev. You should rest up some more.” Chiron says stretching. Kevin sucks his teeth, sitting up. He looks down at Chiron.

“I ain’t tired. I’m up now.”

“I’m sorry I…”

“Chiron, man. Stop with all that apologizing.”

Chiron is quiet. Now it’s his turn to fiddle and drum on the bed.

“I just…” he tries to explain. He’s silenced with a kiss. He inhales in surprise and when Kevin pulls away, he smiles shyly.

“What was that for?” he asks, looking down quickly. Kevin smirked.

“You gotta pretty mouth, Chiron but you’re using it for the wrong reasons.” Kevin says. Chiron gives a questioning glance.

“I don’t mean it that way, Black,” Kevin begins, but reconsidering he adds, “But it is certainly open for interpretation.” He grins.

"I mean, you could do the interpreting if y’want…” Chiron trails off, lying on his back, Kevin’s laughter bursting through the air. Kevin lies back down and looks at Chiron, wondering how he got so lucky, memorizing his beautiful dark skin, taking everything down with his eyes, every line and gentle curve, etching it into his brain.

“Whatchu always starin’ at me for, Kev?” Chiron asks looking away.

“You so damn beautiful.” He says, exhaling, warm breath hitting Chiron’s cheek.

“Ah, come on, Kev.” He says, embarrassed by his praise. Kevin chuckles, grabbing him.

“Nah, you come on, Chiron.” He says leaning forward to pepper kisses on Chiron’s neck.

Chiron pushes him off, climbing on top. “You’ll do a lotta that.” He says taking the opportunity to run his hands over Kevin’s chest, down his stomach. Kevin watches his hands, trapping plump lips between white teeth.

“Mmm, do a lotta what, Black?” he asks, thoroughly enjoying Chiron’s movements. Chiron makes a sound, low in his throat.

“Comin’.” He says before leaning down to suck on Kevin’s pulse, feeling the man underneath him arch up.

“Chiron…” he moans, grabbing his waist.

“Shh. I gotchu, Kev.” Comes the confident reply, voice deepened by lust.

Chiron had him alright.

***

Kevin woke up to hands running down his back, slow and glorious. He squints his eyes against the harsh sun that was invading the room. He swallows and turns around, the clock now reading that it was nine thirty two. He lets out a long breath, still internally debating whether or not he should go to work.

“You up?” Chiron asks, hands still running.

“Yeah…damn, Chiron,” Kevin says softly with a chuckle, “You knocked me out.” Silence.

“Glad you enjoyed, it.” Chiron says, absent mindedly, focused on the soft skin underneath his fingertips. Kevin shifts to lie again on his back, grabs Chiron’s hand and kisses it before sitting up to stretch.

“Aye, come on, Black. I’ll make you something to eat before I go to work.” He says already kicking his legs out of the bed. Chiron looks him up and down, watching as he back muscles quiver and flex as he takes a deep breath. He feels his insatiable hunger for him stir up again, wanting to do nothing but make love until they were nothing but sweat, skin and soft pants. He clears his throat and follows Kevin, who’s already making his way out of the room, tossing on his shirt.
Kevin takes a frying pan out of the bottom cabinet, and rinses it in the sink before calling over to Chiron.

“You excited to see Teresa? How long has it been?”

“Ah…a few months now. I always love seein’ her. She was the mother I never had.” Chiron says, making his way to the fridge. Kevin nods, trying to skirt around the subject of mothers. “Whatchu makin’?”

“Just some omelets. Nothin’ special.” Kevin says pointing to the fridge, “Would you pass me the eggs, the cheese, the red peppers, and a lemon?” Chiron pauses.

“Lemon? Hmm.”

“Yeah, man. Never heard of that?” Kevin asks, resting the pan on the stove top. Chiron shakes his head, lips jutted out.

“Nah, never.” He says, passing the ingredients to Kevin before sitting down.

“Well, good thing you with a cook now, huh?” Kevin asks, throwing a wink Chiron’s way, smiling coyly.

Chiron sucks his teeth making his way to Kevin, leaning against the counter. “Man, please. I throw it down in the kitchen too.”

“Oh, is that right?” Kevin asks, eyebrows raised, laughter dancing in his eyes. “I bet you can’t even crack an egg, bruh.” He says, letting the laugh out. Chiron squints in mock anger.

“Now you just bein’ disrespectful,” he replies, snatching an egg from Kevin, “Gimme that. You just gon’ be embarrassed when I prove you wrong.”

Kevin steps back, hands up in surrender. “I’m watching.” He says, grabbing a bowl. “Matter o’ fact, forget even cracking the egg, jus’ make me breakfast.” He says. “How about that?”

“Now you wildin’, Kev, on some real shit.” Chiron says laughing, cracking the egg into the bowl. He cracks another, then another before carefully sliding the bowl to Kevin.

“How you like that right there?” he asks leaning back against the counter. Kevin walks over to examine what Chiron’s done. He looks up, lips puckered, shaking his head back and forth.

“What?” Chiron asks incredulously, “I did good!”

“Nigga, there’s more shell than egg here. Whatchu tryna do? Kill us?” he asks. Chiron rolls his eyes, tossing the egg shells in the trash and wiping his hands.

“Whatever, Kev.” He says sitting down. “I guess I’ll leave it to you then, Mr. Chef.”

“If you wanna see another birthday, I suggest you do.” Kevin says over his shoulder. “You can’t cook for shit but your looks compensate for it.”

***
After breakfast, Kevin showers, Chiron following suit. It was gonna be a long day but Chiron’s veins were thrumming with excitement about seeing Teresa. He doesn’t remember who he heard it from but he there was a rumor going around that she started seeing someone and it was quickly becoming serious.

The business that takes place as Kevin and Chiron get ready is comfortable. It feels so natural to Chiron. He imagines a hundred mornings just like this one; Kevin running around, smelling like clean linen with a dash of cologne, searching for a comb, a brush or a pick to do his hair, cursing when he doesn’t find one. His t-shirt isn’t tucked in and his pants aren’t buttoned and a thin sheet of sweat is already making itself known on his neck, his forehead. Chiron scoots over, steps aside when Kevin, in a flash is preparing himself. All he needed to do was put on a normal outfit, jeans and another plain shirt. He helps Kevin look for something to do his hair with, sucking his teeth and rolling his eyes when he finds a comb, fallen just beside the dresser. He brings it to Kevin who’s buttoning up the shirt at last and feels a thousand butterflies flapping their wings in his stomach when Kevin looks at him like he’s the best thing in the world. He takes a napkin from the counter and wipes Kevin’s face and neck with it while he’s doing his pants. Kevin sighs.

“Thanks, Chiron. You keepin’ me sane this morning.” He says, stooping down to put on his shoes. Chiron throws the napkin away and sits down, playing with his keys.

“I’m jus’ glad you don’ have to walk. Sun’s killin’ me from inside the house. Can’t imagine how it is outside.” Chiron says. Kevin nods in agreement.

“That’s a fact.” He says, standing up. The time was ten twenty five. Kevin usually showed up an hour early for his shifts because sometimes he had to walk and take the bus and he tried to anticipate traffic.

“You ready to go?” Chiron asks, standing up with him. Kevin nods, grabbing his backpack, which had things to keep him busy on his break, like books and newspapers.

“Aye, one more thing, man,” Kevin says digging in his backpack for the house keys, “If you come home earlier than me, feel free to let yourself in, rest up, eat, watch a movie…whatever.” He puts them into Chiron’s side pocket and pats it before walking out the door. Chiron follows, shutting the door behind him. 'Home,' he thinks, smiling to himself, loving the sound of that. He wishes Kevin would say it more often.

Once they get into the car, Chiron blasts the air conditioning and Kevin immediately throws his head back, groaning in pleasure at the sensation. Chiron swallows, internally cursing the fact that Kevin had no idea what he did to him. He felt like a schoolboy, getting turned on by the slightest things that Kevin did but after all those years filled with wanting and imagining what it would be like if things ended up different, Chiron didn’t know what to do with his newfound reality.

The drive was silent, but pleasant. They didn’t need to speak and it wasn’t awkward. Chiron let the wind, the music do their job of relaxing them. Once in a while, Kevin would tell short stories like the time he forgot his bus money, having to walk thirty minutes back home to grab it and being over two hours late for work, or the time a strange lady followed him from work, trying to strike up conversation about religion. After a long day, Kevin let her down quite harshly and he winces at the memory now but people weren’t to be trusted. Especially if they started following you.

Chiron laughs at Kevin’s uneasiness while explaining the story, pulling up to the diner. Kevin lets out a breath and grabs his things.

“Well…I guess this is where we part ways for today.” He says. Chiron nods.

“Thanks for the ride, Chiron.”

“No problem, Kev. I’ll see you later, alright? What time you get off?” he asks.

“I don’t know. Sometimes I stay later because it’s busy. It depends. I’ll call you though.” He says. He starts to get out of the car but suddenly gets back in. “Oh, shit, I forgot something.” He says.

“What’s that, man?” Chiron asks.

“This.” He says swiftly kissing Chiron on the lips. He winks smiling at Chiron’s expression and gets out, shutting the door and knocking on the window twice to wish Chiron a safe travel to Teresa. She was only thirty minutes from the diner, so it wasn't bad. He watches Kevin walk in, with that cool way of his and he shifts gears again, reversing the car to back up.

Chiron feels like he’s floating as he drives away.

Chapter Text

The highway stretched for miles and miles under the blazing Miami sun, seeming barren. The radio was on low, a random song dropping the bass, a quick verse being spit out. He was feeling everything but nothing at the same time, enjoying the buzzing sensation that was running through his veins, rendering him peacefully numb. He drummed on the steering wheel with his thumb, running over his beard with the other hand. Chiron was in a purely euphoric state. Nothing could’ve brought him down at that moment. He couldn’t wait to reach Teresa.

Teresa. With her warm smile and persistently open arms. She loved Chiron. She clothed him when he had nothing to wear, bathed him when he was dirty from the other kids pushing him in the mud to beat him up and call him a “faggot,” and brought his spirits up when reality became too much of a burden to bear. Life couldn’t take away her smile, even after the death of Juan. Chiron didn’t understand how Teresa could handle so many broken souls and bad news, but it just seemed to attract her. That was just…always who she was. He hoped that no one would ever take away her smile and that life wouldn’t wear her down too much.

Quickly taking his thoughts off of Teresa, he wondered about Travis. How was he doing back home without him? Chiron hoped he was getting those stacks, setting people straight, holding it down. When he would go back to Atlanta, he hoped too many things weren’t in disarray. Travis would probably fuck something up, though. He was too skittish, couldn’t take a joke, it’s like the guy just gave off a nervous air. He would get destroyed. Chiron shook his head, already calculating things he would have to try and fix, everyday staying in Miami was probably money out of his pocket, but for Kevin, it was worth it.

The highway started to dwindle and die as Chiron took the next two exits, fading into the outline of Chiron’s city. Teresa’s house was only five minutes off of it. As the familiar houses started to blend in together, Chiron took a deep breath when he saw his own. He looked away, unwilling, unable to see it. Arriving at his destination soon after, he parked while she was just coming out, looking like she was about to go somewhere. Signs of light aging made themselves apparent on her face. She still had the same petite figure though, her beautiful hair crowning and surrounding her delicate features. She turned around to lock the door behind her, not even noticing Chiron’s car parked in front. He beeped the horn lightly, making her turn around and shield her eyes against the sun’s assaulting glare.

Her mouth immediately turned up into a smile and she jingled her keys in excitement as Chiron stopped the car and got out.

“Chiron…oh boy…” she said, ending her sentence to step into his embrace. He squeezed tightly, not wanting to let her go. So many memories came flooding back with the soft scent of lavender soap and vanilla body spray. There’d been so many times where Chiron would find himself in her embrace, the same way, focusing on breathing everything in, shutting his eyes to avoid the fall of tears. She pulled away from him, still holding him at shoulders’ length.

“Boy, why’d you take so long to come see me! I’ve been missin’ you!” she said, searching for his eyes when Chiron smiled, looking down with embarrassment.

“I’m sorry. Things have been…busy, back home.”

“Well were these “things” holding your hand back from pickin’ up a phone?” came the playful reply. Chiron chuckled now, looking up to meet her eyes, light dancing off of them.

“Nah, nothin’ like that.”

“Then what’s it like, Chiron?” she said nudging him. Chiron is quiet for a moment and she sucks her teeth at him.

“Mm. Don’t even try to lie neither,” she says as she unlocks the door, “Get in here, boy.”

Chiron steps in and peers around the kitchen, everything still the same, save for some new curtains and tablecloth. He takes a seat facing the front door, remembering what Juan said about being able to see everything. He’s especially taken it to heart with the line of work he’s in now.

Teresa put her keys down, going over to the fridge to open it. “You want anything?” she calls over her shoulder.

“Nah, I’m good. Thank you, though.”

Teresa sizes him up, in disbelief. “I know you’re hungry, Chiron. All you did when you came over here was eat.” She said. Chiron smiled. Teresa could bring the devil himself to his knees begging for her food. He swallowed when his mouth watered at the thought of her lasagna, her rice, her chicken, along with the warm soft cookies that melted in your mouth that she often served for dessert. He let his fingers trace over the squares of the plaid tablecloth, birds chirping their songs enthusiastically from outside.

“Well if you ain’t hungry, at least make me happy by drinkin’ some lemonade.” She says taking the pitcher from the fridge and grabbing a cup from the cabinet, rinsing it off. Chiron knocks on the wood twice and nods in resignation.

“Anything for you.” He says, earning an eye roll. He thanks Teresa when she hands him the cup. She sits down across from him, leaning on her forearms to watch him drink. As Chiron takes a sip, she begins speaking.

“You know, it’s funny because Kevin called a few days ago, askin’ about you.” She begins. Chiron nods, silent as he puts his cup down. “I’m assuming you’re here for him?” she presses on gently.

“Yeah…I, uh, stopped by at the diner he was workin’ at, we talked and I been…been stayin’ at his place for a few since then.”

“Oh, it’s been a few days? How nice.” she says softly. He runs his fingers over the mouth of the glass, nodding slowly while tracing its circular opening. Teresa smiles, understanding and not wanting to pry too much.

“That’s nice. Enjoying each other’s company,” she says, “That’s what it’s all about. Good times and good vibes.”

“Yeah. Makes me forget… ‘bout all the years I’ve missed with him.” Chiron falters. “Sometimes it feels like we was never apart.” Teresa smiles and grabs his hand.

“I’m glad Kevin makes you feel that way.” She says, rubbing her thumb over the back of his hand. Chiron clenches his jaw and he tears his eyes away from Teresa’s gaze to peer into his lemonade, watching the pulp float carelessly around in the drink. He got a flashback to when Teresa and Juan were sitting with him at the same exact table, telling him he didn’t have to know who he loved, that it didn’t matter who he loved. Now that he knew, he wasn’t sure if was ready to make it explicit although he knew some part of Teresa was definitely concrete on the fact that his heart belonged to Kevin.

Chiron never really brought his love life to Teresa. Mostly talked about school, his mother and such…if he was even in the mood to talk.

“Whatchu been up to?” Teresa says, sighing and leaning back into her seat.

“It’s only been a few months, Teresa. Still doin’ the same ol’ thing.” Chiron says grimacing when he sees her face at his response.

“It felt like so much longer,” she says. “Excuse me, Mr., You know you not too old to get smacked upside the head.” Chiron laughs.

“Really though? Forgive me then. I meant no disrespect.” he says putting his hands up. Teresa purses her lips and stands up to take Chiron’s glass.

“What about you though, Teresa? Whatchu been doin?” he asks after a moment. “Heard you’ve been seeing someone? Getting serious?”

Teresa scoffs in annoyance. “Boy, please. They talkin bout that man, Deric Johnson. I never so much as batted an eyelash at that man. He thinks he’s it with a nice sports car and a lot of money, donating to impoverished schools here,” she puts the cup back in the cabinet, closing it roughly, “I see right through that man. These women out here can have him cause I don’t want him.” She sits down again, face in her hands and sighs. “Ion even know why people believe we’re together. Think someone said something about a comment he made about me. Saying I’d be his and all. I shut it down real quick but people love rumors.” She smiles dryly.

“How’d you even meet him?” Chiron asks, curious.

“Ah…I stopped at church one Sunday to catch a sermon. Don’t really go often, but he was there. He was giving a testimony that I didn’t really pay attention to,” she scratches her arm, trying to remember, but failing, she continues, “anyway, this man’s eyes meet mine and you would’ve sworn somebody lit a fire in his pupils. Like I said…wasn’t interested though. Not even from the jump.” She laughs. Chiron shakes his head. “My life’s been pretty much the same though. Nothin’ too extreme.”

“Yeah.” Chiron says. “You were goin’ out before I came, I’m sorry I didn’t…” Teresa shakes her head.

“I was just gonna take a walk. Keep my mind busy. Stop at my cousin’s house or something.” She pats the table. “I would have you here anytime and I’d certainly pick you over my cousin Denise,” she says laughing, “That girl knows how to talk…but she’s a great listener too.”

“So overall, nothin’ new?” Chiron asks. Teresa shakes her head.

“Nothin. I know you got news but…you’ll share when you’re ready.” She says winking and standing up. Chiron was shocked. Teresa definitely knew something, but how could she tell something significant had happened between Kevin and himself? Was it the way he talked about him? Chiron doesn’t confirm or deny anything. He stays quiet, rising with Teresa.
They go to the living room, get even more comfortable and Chiron listens to Teresa’s stories for hours. He listens about stories about Juan, stories about himself, how he made Teresa feel like a mother, an opportunity she never got to have with Juan. At some point, she started to get teary.

“You know, if life weren’t so unfair…me, you and Juan could’ve been a great family.” She says, “What I’d give to just be able to make dinner for y’all again and talk about absolutely nothing. Given, you didn’t say much but your presence was always valued, Chiron,” a pause, “I love you. Don’t you ever forget it.”

Chiron leans in for another hug into which Teresa gladly gives. She sniffles. “I love you too, Teresa. I’ll never forget.” He swipes a thumb across her cheek when they pull away and she chuckles.

“Thanks, baby…” she sighs. They sit in a comfortable silence, letting the atmosphere bathe them in things better left unsaid.

***
Chiron leaves Teresa’s house feeling light, fulfilled. It felt good to reconnect. Even though it’d only been a few months, Chiron started to feel heavy when he didn’t get to talk to Teresa. She knew the things he wanted to say only by looking into his eyes and she reacted exactly how he needed her to. A hug, a soft word, a kiss. Whatever it was, Teresa was always in tune. Kevin proved to be somewhat the same, but he was more of Chiron’s rock, something sturdy to lean on when he got weak.

The time was already five thirty, Chiron presumed the latest Kevin would be home is ten thirty to eleven. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do at the house without him. He pulled out his phone, dialing Travis’ number. Might as well squeeze in some business while he was driving to Kevin’s house.

“Hello?” came the reply.

“Yo, what’s up, man?” Chiron asked.

“Nothin much, man. You know, vibin’, vibin’. Always.” Travis responded.

“The streets. How they lookin? Anybody tryna play smart? Fuck you over?” he asked, clenching the steering wheel. He really hoped Travis wasn’t acting stupid.

“Nah, never that, nigga. I’m holdin shit down out here, you know what I’m sayin? It's all good. But whatchu doin’ in Miami, bruh? When you comin back?”

“Don’t worry about me. Worry bout you and my money and them drugs. Don’t go fuckin’ things up, you hear, Travis?” he says, annoyed.

“Chill, man, chill. I gotchu, baby, you already know what it is out here. Sorry to cut you off, but it’s some bitches from down the block and ion wanna keep them waiting, you feel?” He says. Chiron can hear the smile through the phone.

“You better be worrying about my money. Or it’s your ass.” He says, hanging up and tossing the phone in the passenger seat. He turned up the radio just as his favorite song began to play. Jidenna's song. Classic Man. It wasn't even his favorite until he started associating that night with Kevin with the song. The highway stretched and for some reason, the ride felt longer than before.

***

Back at Kevin’s place, Chiron had eaten and gone to lay down before having to pick Kevin up. He ran a hand over his stomach tiredly. He was back in the guest room, not wanting to lay in Kevin’s room without him. It was hard not to think about sex. Chiron chuckled at himself. Was it that good? That it had him enslaved to these sexual thoughts? Definitely. Without a doubt. With Kevin, it wasn’t about the obvious goal of sex which was to get pleasure. It was about loving. It was about reciprocation and feeling appreciated. When he was with Kevin, he saw stars, couldn’t get enough of the pleasure that seemed to overwhelm him, threaten to burst out of his skin. He didn’t think anyone else could make him feel like that if they tried. Not that he ever wondered about it. Chiron didn’t want to wear it out though. He wanted every time to feel like the first. He had to control himself although he wasn’t sure how he could. When he and Kevin laid entangled in each other’s sweaty arms, out of breath and still shaking, it was the safest he felt.

He couldn’t wait for Kevin to come home.

Chapter Text

Chiron woke up with a start, blindly reaching for his phone with a panic. Kevin. What time was it? Had his shift ended? Was he stuck without a ride? When he finally felt the cool device under his palm, he yanked it up to his face, turning it on and squinting his eyes against the glare. It was ten thirty. Kevin called twice. One phone call was made ten minutes ago, the other several hours ago. Chiron figured he was on his break, wanted to talk to him. He sat up quickly, feeling light headed for a brief second, calling Kevin back through his foggy vision. The phone felt like it took ten years in between each ring.

“Chiron?”

“Kev, I missed your call, man. My fault, you a’ight? You done for tonight?” Chiron asked. He tried not to sound like he just woke up from a deep nap but his deepened voice was surely giving it away.

“Yeah, man. I’m straight.” Kevin said. Chiron immediately noticed that he didn’t sound right. Almost like he was struggling to catch his breath. Wheezing.

“You a’ight, Kev? You sound like you just took a run, man.” Chiron said, pressing the phone closer to his ear. He swung his legs over to the side of the bed, stepping around for his shoes. When he found them, he quickly shoved them on, standing.

“Yeah, Black. I’m fine.” Kevin said, clearing his throat. “So I’ll see you in a bit, right?”

“Yeah, no doubt.” Chiron said, unable to rid the weird feeling he had in his stomach. He was unconsciously walking faster, the house darkened save for the moonlight bathing the kitchen. The keys were on the table as Chiron had left them before taking a nap. He grabbed them, opening the door and stepping out into the warm night.
The car was still hot when he got in, warming the back of his thighs almost instantly. He turned the vehicle on, opening the windows before shifting gears and speeding down the road. For some reason, he felt like he was doing everything too slowly, felt like the roads were filled with traffic when there was only two cars ahead of him in the left lane, felt like he didn’t turn fast enough, felt like he didn’t step on the gas hard enough when the blare of the red light turned green. Maybe he was overreacting though, just reading into things too much. Kevin was probably fine. He trusted Chiron. He would’ve told him if something was up. As he approached another red light, Chiron opened the dashboard, felt around lightly for the gun he kept there. Just in case he was wrong.

‘Hope you straight, Kev.’ Chiron thought to himself stroking his beard roughly.

Chiron distracted himself the rest of the way there, thinking of things he had to handle back in Atlanta. He made a mental checklist, visiting his mother more or less at the bottom.
He sighed in relief when the diner finally came into view, speeding up and recklessly turning into the lot. He shut off the radio, not even realizing that it was on. Perhaps that’s why all his thoughts were jumbled. He scanned the parking lot for Kevin, beeped once or twice when he didn’t see him and waited. When Kevin still didn’t show up, he grabbed his cell, rushing to dial his number.

“Chiron, man…” came the voice Chiron had so desperately wanted to hear, “I was jus’ takin’ out the trash. I’m here.” Chiron ended the call and watched Kevin saunter over to him, examining him quickly. Chiron didn’t notice anything off right away but upon closer examination, he saw that Kevin was missing the top button of his uniform, the same button that Chiron remembered Kevin fumbling with, cursing until Chiron got it for him. Chiron didn’t want to seem weird to Kevin, noticing such a small detail, so he waited. Maybe Kevin would reveal something else to solidify a reason for his concerns. When Kevin got into the car, he slung his backpack into the back seat and extended a hand to dap Chiron up.

“I appreciate the ride, man.” Kevin said, breaking the silence after a while. Chiron nodded to him, mumbling an unintelligible response. “How was Teresa? Did y’all enjoy catching up?” He said, curious about Chiron’s silence. Chiron nodded again, still distracted. Kevin sucked his teeth.

“What’s good with you, Chiron? You back to noddin’ again?” he asked turning to face him, a smile in his eyes, not daring to make itself present on his mouth.
“It was nice, Kev. We talked a lot.” Chiron said, locking eyes with Kevin for a brief second. “How was the shift? A’ight?” Kevin exhaled, allowing himself to sag in his seat. He had his hand on his ribs, but Chiron didn’t notice.

“Tiring. It was busy because it was extra nice out. People love to stumble in, bring friends, family…but overall it was good, man. Real good.” A sigh fills the car. The rest of the ride was quiet.

***

When they get to the house, Kevin gets out rather slowly, opening the door behind the passenger seat to get his bag. Chiron gets out too, neck moist despite having the windows open. He hated the heat. It was all over his body, making everything slippery, everything uncomfortable and while it didn’t get into his bones like a chill would, he felt suffocated.
The quiet scuffle of their feet on pavement was one of the only noises Chiron heard except for the chirping of crickets and windows being shoved open by other hot and bothered residents.

Inside was cooler than outside, despite Kevin having a busted up air conditioner. He’d spoken about how he tried to fix it multiple times but gave up after a few minutes each time, annoyed. He would just take his shirt off and sit in the kitchen, windows open, soft music playing in the background, doing nothing.

Chiron discarded his keys on the table once again, Kevin trailing off to his bedroom to take his clothes off and go shower. Chiron leaned against the counter. The soft breeze coming from the window prompted him to take his shirt off, dabbing his stomach and neck with it. He kept it clutched in his hand for a moment, listening to the soft whir and clunk of the fridge as it settled. Eventually he got bored and went to go to Kevin’s room, thoroughly cooled off.

“Shit…” Chiron heard Kevin say. He was in the guest room so Chiron redirected his steps and walked in, confusion swiftly turning to anger and concern. Kevin had bruises on his ribs, one on his left collar bone and another one forming just under his jaw.

“Yo, Kev, what the fuck is this?” Chiron said crossing the room in almost two steps. He grabbed Kevin a little too roughly by the shirt. Kevin winced, pulling away.

“Ah…” he said, gently trying to pry Chiron’s hands off of his shirt. He could feel him shaking with contained rage. Though Chiron wasn’t one for much eye contact, he was burning holes through Kevin at the moment. “It’s nothing, Black. Just a couple of niggas that got riled up…”

“Bullshit!” Chiron spat, closing the distance between them once again, helping Kevin peel off his uniform. “Who did this to you and why’re you hiding it from me? I thought you trusted me, Kev!”

“I do, Chiron. It’s nothing though, forreal…shit…” he said again. Chiron didn’t hear him though, he was already in the kitchen, digging through the freezer for ice. He found a napkin and a plastic bag, quickly arranging a makeshift icepack. He brought it to Kevin who was sitting on the bed at this point, shaking his head.

“Ion even know what happened, man. I was just closing the diner for the night and next thing I know, these niggas are jumpin’ me. Probably thought I had some money but the cash registers were all locked up at that point.”

“Well, I’m gon’ find them…” Chiron said beginning to pace. Kevin rolled his eyes, reaching for the icepack. Chiron, forgetting about it, jumped to his side, gingerly putting it on his ribs. Kevin sighed.

“For what, Chiron? I didn’t even see what they looked like, man.”

“Don’ worry bout that. I’m strapped. I’ll find ‘em, Kev.” Chiron said softly, paying attention to Kevin’s facial expressions as he applied more pressure with the ice.

“Nah, fuck that, Chiron. So whatchu sayin’, man? Huh? You gon’ find these guys in Miami, shoot em’ up and go back to jail?” Kevin shook his head, standing up. Chiron grabbed at his wrist and Kevin pulled away. “You not goin’ to jail for me is whatchu not gon’ do. Take a minute, cool down. Shit like this happens all the time. I’m just glad they didn’t do worse.”

Chiron was silent. This time it was Kevin’s turn to drill holes into him. Who would do that to Kevin? Chiron felt the anger rushing through his veins. He would hate to separate from Kevin after just reconnecting but he grew to be impulsive. If you got messed with in the hood, you found the men who did it and you would do them in. No hesitation, no doubt. It was a constant game of tag, in a fatal way.

“You know, you look good when you mad, Black.” Kevin said softly, smiling. He took the ice from Chiron’s long dark fingers and pressed it against his moist neck. Chiron shied away from it, batting Kevin’s hands away.

“Cut that shit out, bruh.” He said quietly, looking down, smiling along with Kevin. “You lucky you talked me out of it. Makes sense. For now, though.” He said, standing up to wrap an arm around Kevin, dropping a kiss to his cool, wet neck. “If you ever recognize anyone though, even if it’s just a suspicion, lemme know and I’ll bang ‘em out. No questions. No hesitation.”

“Nah, I’m straight, Black.” Kevin said laughing, making sure not to move his ribs too much. “You on one.”

“Yeah. I guess I am.” Chiron said, placing his hand over the one Kevin was using to hold the ice.

He would make sure this didn’t happen again. Kevin didn’t want to mess up his probation. It was why he didn’t fight back, but Chiron would make sure he didn’t have to.

Chapter Text

“Man cut it out, Black.” Kevin said pushing Chiron's roaming hands away. “That shit’s sore.”

“Chill out, Kev. I ain’t even pressin’ that hard.” Chiron replied, softly.

“Nah you said ‘light pressure’, I feel like you tryna make my lungs collapse, man. Damn.” Kevin took the opportunity to lie back down on the bed, holding his hands up to block Chiron from following.

“Aye man, forreal. I’m done with your lil’ form of therapy. A’ight?” Chiron sucks his teeth and throws the icepack on the bedside drawer.

“You jus’ gettin’ soft on me, Kev.” he says teasingly standing up.

“Man, please.”

“You need anything else, though?” Chiron said, pausing to look back at Kevin who was already closing his eyes.

“Yeah, man. You.” He says. “Do what you gotta do and get back in here.” He pulls the blanket up to meet his waist and lays a hand on his chest.

“Yeah, I’ll be back. Imma just wash my face and change my clothes.”

“If you don’t hurry up, you might jus’ lose your place.” Kevin says, chuckling to himself.

“To who?” Chiron asks, hanging onto the door frame. Kevin sucks his teeth, looking at Chiron as if the answer were obvious.

“Me, nigga. Shit, you should know I’m a bad sleeper by now.” Chiron laughs. It was true too. Kevin was quiet, shy and reserved during his waking moments but in bed, when he was knocked out…that was a whole other story.

***

When Chiron was in bed with Kevin, they weren’t talking. Chiron listened to the sound of Kevin’s soft, slightly wheezy breath, the sounds of people talking beyond the gates on the sidewalk, and the sounds of crickets singing their nightly song.

A few breaths later, Kevin rolls over to face Chiron. He was staring at the ceiling intensely, gnawing on his bottom lip, hands under his head, in deep concentration. He was definitely a sight for sore eyes. The way the light illuminated his already gorgeous features made Kevin want to blink and ask if Chiron really belonged to him. Something he’s actually done more times than he could’ve counted. He took his thumb and swiped it gently across Chiron’s bottom lip, freeing it from the grasp of his teeth. Chiron looked over to him, a question in his eyes, searching Kevin’s for answers. He began to tap his fingers on his stomach when Kevin held his gaze for a second too long.

“What you thinkin’ about, Black?” He eventually asks.

“That’s a loaded question, Kev.” He says chuckling, dryly.

“I’m here, ain’t I?” Kevin replies. “Aye,” he says, grabbing Chiron’s chin when he finally looks away. “You see me goin’ somewhere anytime soon?” Chiron was silent for a few seconds, but it was a few seconds too long for Kevin.

“Do you?” he persists. Chiron shakes his head.

“Nah, Kev. I don’t.” he says.

“Cause I mean… I could do a pretty good job of convincin' you otherwise.” He tries, getting a chuckle out of Chiron. He feels relief at this, thankful that whatever he was thinking about didn’t grip him too hard.

“Play too much, man.”

“So what’s up then, Chiron? You a’ight? Talk to me, man.” Kevin pleads.

“It wasn’t anything much. I was just thinkin’ about something Teresa said earlier.” Chiron says, trapping his bottom lip between his teeth once more. “Ion know, Kev. Life would’ve been so much…better with her. You know?”

“Yeah. I get it, Chiron. Life just has a funny way of fuckin’ you over.” Kevin says, hand resting on Chiron’s bare and smooth stomach.

“But I’m just imaginin’ what it would be like if life had gone differently. Be doin’ that shit a lot.” Comes Chiron’s murmur.

“But it didn’t.” Kevin soothes. “Right here, right now with you man, I’m glad it didn’t go any different.”

“You right.” Chiron says, "But..." He gives up and sighs after failing to find the words, shaking his head. "You right, Kev."

“Nigga, ain’t I always?” He sits up, throwing his legs over the side of the bed, tapping Chiron’s stomach. “Come on. Let’s go.” He says standing. He readjusts his chain and stares back at Chiron.

“Where we goin’? It’s late.” Chiron asks. He gets up anyway, throwing his white shirt on along with his sweats. The bed looked real good to him in that moment.

“You’ll know for sure when we get there.” He says over his shoulder as he walks out. Chiron scratches his face, walking faster to catch up with Kevin. He had his sneakers on by the time Chiron made it to the kitchen. The house was dark and still save for a consistent humming from the fridge. Chiron grabs his sneakers from in front of the door and shoves them on before walking over to the front door and waiting for Kevin.

When Kevin is settled, the door opens and he grabs the keys off of the kitchen table. Together, they walk out into the humid night time, streetlight and moonlight meeting as one. Chiron looks down and sighs, trying to focus on the sounds their feet made as they hit the sidewalk. They walk for what seems like two seconds because it was back and around Kevin’s house plus a little farther down. The sidewalk gives way to grass and the grass gives way to sand. Chiron knew immediately what Kevin was doing. They walk deeper and deeper into the beach, the ocean looking black and unforgiving.

Chiron began to feel like the walk was gonna last forever if Kevin wanted to walk across the beach like he was doing. Just as he was about to protest however, Kevin stopped, looked at Chiron and sat down, legs out and crossed in front of him. When Chiron didn’t sit down right away, he patted the warm sand next to him.

“Sit down, Black.”

Chiron sat down but he was confused. Why did Kevin take him here? To talk? They could’ve done that in bed back at his place. He didn’t speak right away. He wanted Kevin to take the lead. Maybe he’d clarify. They stared at the ocean for about ten minutes before Kevin said anything. Chiron was leaning back against the sand, supporting himself with his arms. He busied himself by grabbing onto the sand roughly, then releasing it and running his hands through it.

“I was in the spirit to reminisce.” Kevin says quietly. “Never really came back here after what happened...”

Chiron listens patiently, leaning up and off his arms and putting his hands in his lap. When Kevin looks at him, unsure, Chiron nods for him to continue.

“Ion really have anything to say. Jus’ wanted to be back here.” He explains somewhat sheepishly, beginning to pick at the sand himself. His embarrassment made Chiron smile. He found it endearing.

"Nah, man. I get it." Chiron says.

“Yeah. I knew you would.” Kevin says smiling. “But this is the place that started it all, Black. Whatchu think?”

“It’s crazy…” Chiron looks lost as he gazes into the ocean. It didn’t occur to him until that moment that this was the place he often visited nightly, even when he wasn’t in Miami. His dreams took him here. Nothing looked out of place. He could only faintly make out Kevin’s voice, the ocean drowning him out. Chiron was mesmerized by the waves. The soft pushing and pulling of the water as it came and left made him think of Kevin’s hips, covered in sweat as he pushed into him. The sounds the ocean made as it gently crashed before it could hit shore made him think of the hot and wet feverish kisses that were placed on his body. Chiron licked his lips and swallowed, shaking his head to clear the steam left behind by the images. He looked over at Kevin to see if he noticed him in his daze. He did.

“I know.” He said with a smile that matched his words.

“Know what, man?” Chiron asked.

“I know what you thinkin’ about.” Kevin said, looking away to stare into the ocean as well. “I’m thinkin’ about it too.”

“Ion know whatchu talkin’ about, Kev.” Chiron says.

Kevin turns to face Chiron again, and reaches out for him. He grabs his shirt softly and gives him a small tug. Chiron leans in and lets Kevin plant kisses on his jawbone, his neck, going down to his throat and Adam’s apple. He gets to his pulse and lingers, sucking hard until Chiron lets out a soft grunt. Kevin stops, pulls away and looks Chiron in the eyes.

“I’m sure you’ve caught my drift by now, Black.” He says in that sultry voice of his.

“Nah, not really, Kev.” Chiron says with a smirk in his voice. Kevin smiles back but the look he gives tells Chiron that he isn’t going to help him refresh his memory anymore.
Chiron gets closer to Kevin before standing up to push him softly onto the sand. Kevin smiles up at him, softly.

“Whatchu want, Black?” he asks, knowing where this was going and exactly what Chiron wanted.

“You ain’t gotta ask me.” Chiron says quietly, bringing himself to straddle Kevin and rub his finger on the bruise near Kevin’s neck. He leans in, lips hovering above the other man’s bruise. “You already know…”

Kevin grabs Chiron’s hips, lets him devour his lips in sloppy, open mouthed kisses. Chiron is careful though, making sure not to press on his injuries. Kevin reciprocates just as hungrily, humming in approval. When Chiron shifts a bit on his lap trying to get dangerously closer, Kevin swears that he loses vision for a second. He moans, hips jerking up involuntarily, the tips of his fingers tingling with pleasure.

“Fuck…” he says, gasping for breath. His flailing hands finds Chiron’s small waist again, squeezing. “Shit, Chiron.”

Chiron doesn’t answer though. He just continues to grind on Kevin, both of the men rock hard beneath their sweatpants. Kevin’s eyes start to flutter, roll back and his grip begins to loosen on Chiron. The ocean begins to sound louder and louder as he concentrates on the intense feeling of lust and pleasure attacking him, crashing over him, consuming him like a ball of fire.

Chiron’s hips stutter roughly and he cries out brokenly, gripping the sand. He closes his eyes and breathes harshly onto Kevin’s neck. He was close. He stops for a minute, peppering kisses on Kevin’s mouth, exhaling when the man beneath him opens up, inviting him in. They kiss for a while, only coming up for air once and it’s pure bliss to Chiron, getting to kiss the smooth lips again and again. The breeze hits his hot back and the crickets are still chirping from a place unknown to them but he doesn’t care, obviously. Kevin snakes a hand between them and delves into Chiron’s pants, grabbing his hard member. He starts to jerk hard and fast and at first, it’s too much for Chiron. He breaks the kiss, biting his bottom lip so hard, Kevin begins to worry he’ll gnaw it off. His eyebrows are knit together and every time Kevin strokes him, he moans low in his throat.

“Kev…” he says, shaking his head in protest as his body begins to tremble. Kevin knew that Chiron's shaking was a surefire way to know he would come soon.

“Come on, Chiron…” Kevin says, holding onto Chiron’s shaking arm.

“Ah…no…you first.” He says struggling to take Kevin’s hands out of his pants. Kevin wouldn’t have it though. He pushes Chiron’s hand away.

“Wouldn’t wanna miss the moment.” He says, jerking faster. Chiron shakes harder as he tries to control himself, arms starting to give in. The most beautiful sounds were pouring out of his mouth. Kevin shifts so that he’s able to sit up. His chest connects to Chiron’s, hand still working in between them.

Chiron grips onto Kevin’s arm as he comes, a gasp knocked out of him. He tries to stifle his moan into Kevin's shoulder. Kevin keeps stroking until Chiron feels like he’s going to explode. His loud, choked moans turning into whimpers as electricity runs through his veins. He puts a hand on Kevin's chest, weak.

When he finally catches his breath, he looks in between himself and Kevin and sees the mess he made.

“Shit, I’m sorry, Kev.”

Kevin just smiles.

Chapter Text

“Chiron…aye…get up, man.” Kevin whispered softly, putting a hand on Chiron’s moist chest. Half an hour later, they were still at the beach, post-orgasm bliss still lingering in the air. Chiron was lying on the sand, eyes closed, breathing deep.

“Gimme a minute, Kev…” He sighs, brushing sand off from the creases of his abdomen. The wind that bounced off of the ocean came back cool, making them shiver.

“What? You still recoverin’? Kevin laughs, rubbing his arms to rid them of the goose bumps forming there. Chiron laughs.

“Sure.” He offers, voice still holding onto its dreamy, husky sound. He usually sounded like that when he was just waking up. “Thanks, Kev…for everything, man.” Kevin rolls his eyes, chucking a small amount of sand onto Chiron’s stomach.

“Stop thankin’ me, Black. Shit, if anything, I owe you.”

Chiron sits up for that remark, staring at Kevin. His jaw was clenched. Kevin doesn’t need to look him in the eyes to know what emotion lies there. It’s anger but it’s fleeting.

“You don’t owe me a damn thing, Kev. Look…what happened between us in the past, it’s gone. I don’t give a fuck about it anymore. I ain’t here for it.”

“Man, I know…” Kevin says softly, “But it’s just that…”

“It’s just like what, Kev?” Chiron asks. No response. It’s the first time Kevin goes quiet, fidgeting under Chiron’s intense gaze. The ocean runs up to meet them, falling a few feet short of contact. The cool air blasts them again, Kevin trying to control his shivering. The moon was running away from them, the men not realizing how quickly the night was ending.

Chiron gets up after a pause, brushing his sweats off, quickly, harshly, before extending a hand to Kevin to help him up. When Kevin’s up, Chiron uses the opportunity to envelope him in a hug, feeling the other man’s apprehension.

“It’s good, Kev. We good.” He says. After a second, he feels Kevin’s arm wrap around him. They stay like that for what seems like a long time before Chiron pulls away, grabbing Kevin’s head and planting a swift kiss on his forehead. Kevin is in awe, though his heart feels like it'll beat out of his chest.

“Let’s go.” Chiron says coolly, picking his shirt up and shaking the sand out of it before sweeping it across his back He finally let it rest on his shoulder. He starts to saunter off, shoulders up in that mean way of his.

“I’m down.” Kevin says softly as he begins to walk after Chiron. Though he’d made Chiron upset, he felt comforted that Chiron wasn’t holding an internal grudge against him. That he didn’t care about the past and wanted to move forward… with him. Even though he said it when they first met again, he couldn’t help but have that skepticism in him. After all, Kevin was the reason that Chiron retaliated against Terrel. He was the reason why Chiron was shipped off and never seen by him again for a decade. He couldn’t let go of the guilt he felt, but he’d try to for Chiron and he would gladly spend the rest of his days trying to make up for the lost years.

They walked quietly, turning their heads only when they heard a loud laugh echoing in the air or people blasting their music as they drove down the road. The rest of the street was quiet and dark.

When they reached the house, the both shed their clothes, reaching over to help each other brush sand off where the other couldn’t reach. Kevin flicked on the kitchen light with a middle finger, the night time still making the atmosphere slightly gloom-like.

“Damn. All this sand, man. I have to take me another shower.” Kevin said kicking off his shoes so he could finish taking the rest of his sweats off. He began to itch his stomach, running his hands through his hair. The sand was embedded in his curls making it almost impossible for him to get it out without thinking about spending a good hour and a half going through them with a fine-tooth comb. It was also going to be painful which made Kevin want to give up altogether before he even started.

“Lemme go first, Kev.” Chiron said already taking a step towards the bathroom.

“Hell nah, nigga. This sand is all in my shit right now.” Kevin said, also taking a step to block Chiron.

“I’m the guest, bruh. You really gon’ make me wait?” Chiron asked, thumbing the waistband of his boxers.

“Man, please. You ain’t no guest.” Kevin said putting a hand on Chiron’s chest to stop him when he kept moving forward.

“When’d you decide that, Kev?” Chiron asked, licking his dry lips.

“Think you know the answer to that.” Kevin said, looking down. Chiron felt his cheeks heat up, eyes fluttering.

“Guess I know a lot of things, huh?” He asked. Kevin grabbed him by the waist, dropping a quick kiss to his shoulder.

“Come on, Black. Ion mind sharing a shower if you don’t.” He said, hooking a finger in Chiron’s boxers and pulling him forward. Chiron didn’t protest and allowed himself to be led.

***
Back in Kevin’s room, both men were lying on their backs, exhausted but euphorically so. The light smell of soap clung to the air and out the window, if Chiron looked hard enough, he could see the sky begin to transform into the pink and orange haze, bringing morning with it.

He turned over to Kevin, whose eyes started to flutter. He watched as he wiped a hand across his face and yawned. Sleep was beginning to win him over. Chiron could tell by the way his breaths deepened. Tired brown eyes met his own and Kevin gave a sleepy smile.

“Night was wild, huh?” he said. He shifted and the bruises on his stomach contorted as he rolled onto them, still staring at Chiron through hooded lids. There was quiet. Chiron swallowed, still looking at Kevin.

“Yeah,” he said, voice slightly hoarse, “I liked it a lot, Kev.”

“I could tell.” Kevin said, smirk in his voice. He reached over and pulled Chiron to him, the other man shifting so that his back was against Kevin’s chest. He ran his palm down Chiron’s stomach, then back up, repeating the motion listening to Chiron’s sighs.

“Day’s over now, though,” Kevin said. “Relax, Black.”

“I will, Kev,” came Chiron’s mumble. Kevin’s warmth consumed him, comforted him. It was odd how he always seemed to do the right thing, no matter how or what Chiron was feeling. His eyes started to feel heavy, body relaxed.

“Chiron?” Kevin said, voice a tired murmur.

“Yeah,” Chiron said. It was so quiet that if Kevin weren’t listening, he might’ve missed it.

“I just… I wanted to tell you that…” Kevin started, swallowing, hesitance in his voice. Chiron’s ears perked up at the silence, waiting for Kevin’s beautiful voice to fill it once more.

“Tell me what, Kev? You aight?”

“Yeah, no, man, I'm okay. I just wanted to let you know that I…I love you, Chiron.” His hand was frozen on Chiron’s stomach, afraid to make another move. Both men were silent, listening to a stray bird’s first call. Chiron was opening his mouth but no words wanted to come out. He swallowed, throat tight, desperately wanting for his vocal cords to coordinate the sounds that would tell Kevin he loved him too but they froze, not knowing how to say these words. He turned around and faced Kevin, eyes feeling lighter. Words still made no attempt to escape his lips but Kevin was patient though, not forcing anything and certainly not making Chiron feel uncomfortable. His soft brown eyes made Chiron melt. When he finally spoke, he was surprised to find tears in his voice.

“I love you too, Kev.”

A beat, then an exhale.

“Shit, Black. Thought you wasn’t gon’ say it back for a minute.” Kevin said exhaling, the knot in his stomach shrinking. Chiron chuckled, a single tear running down his cheek, despite his previous effort to blink it away. He's dreamed about this moment before. Thought it would happen much sooner but fate obviously had other plans. Kevin leaned in and kissed the tear, travelling down to Chiron’s lips next, taking his plump bottom lip softly in between his teeth. Chiron made a sound low in his throat and Kevin released him before kissing the soft lips again.

“I'll never get tired of them lips.” He said, pulling Chiron closer. Chiron murmured something unintelligible sighing into Kevin’s throat.

“Yeah, Black...same here” He said laughing softly, closing his own eyes.

***
As the light pink and orange began to mingle, the mesh of colors solidifying into a light blue, Kevin awoke still gripping onto Chiron who was breathing softly against his chest. Kevin moved his arm slightly and felt a soreness there from keeping it in one position for so long. He didn’t want to move though. Chiron looked so beautiful as slept, so careless with the way his arm rested on Kevin’s waist.

He was leaving tomorrow. Had to settle business in Atlanta, perhaps visit his mother. Kevin assumed he’d be staying there for the weekend, maybe more to get things settled. He wanted it to be so that he would wake up to Chiron every morning, face pressed against him and arm around his waist. He wanted to be able to kiss his lips whenever he pleased, drawing soft sighs and bringing about wandering hands. He wanted to make love to him until he went hoarse from yelling out Kevin’s name, shaking, gasping and clinging onto him like he’d lose him, falling asleep in a postcoital daze. He wanted to make Chiron laugh with no reserve at his crazy stories, watching as he threw his head back exposing white teeth and a blinding light in his eyes. Kevin just wanted Chiron so bad that it made him wince to think that he almost didn’t have him. Almost didn’t have this opportunity. He could stay here all day. He only wished Chiron would sleep all day so he could fulfill his desire.

When Kevin got out of his minor daze, he noticed that Chiron was gently clawing at his back, breath quickening and brows furrowing. Kevin watched, hoping it wouldn’t turn into anything serious and when it didn’t, Chiron was settling down again, not yet showing his eyes to the light that pierced through the window.

For a while, it was just silence…and Kevin. It was Kevin and Chiron. It was love and peace. It was happiness. Everything seemed to be frozen for a moment in this perfection. Like all good things though, it didn't last.

Chiron slowly released him and rolled over. For a moment, he laid there, turned away, looking at the window and just breathing, taking in the outside world waking up. Kevin could hear him cracking his knuckles, the bed springs creaking as he coordinated his rippling muscles to put him into a sitting position, softly groaning as they moved.

“How you doin’, Chiron?” Kevin asked, gravel-smooth voice filling the air.

“Mm,” Chiron said, rubbing his eyes, “Good, Kev…you?”

“Same.” Kevin said, rolling over to get out of bed. “You leavin’ me tomorrow, Black.”

“Just to handle some business, Kev. I’ll be back.” Chiron said, standing up and walking over to him. He lightly ran his hands on his collar bones, pressing on the dark mark there. He stared and stared at the expanse of Kevin’s light skin, beauty interrupted with the bruises that laid littered there. “Shit makes me angry.” Chiron said softly, chain twinkling in Kevin’s eye.

“Nothin’ you can do bout it, Black. Told you to leave that shit alone.” Kevin said with an air of dismissal, wrapping his hands around Chiron’s wrist to make him stop poking and prodding. “Come on, I’m hungry as hell right now.” Guiding Chiron into the kitchen, he released his wrist and went to the cabinets to look for pots and pans.

“Whatchu gon’ make today, Chef Kev?” Chiron asks, voice still deep from waking up.

“What do you want?” Kevin tosses over his shoulder, as he washes pots and dishes leftover from the night before.

“Ion know. Whatever you make, I guess.”

“Nigga that ain’t no answer.”

Chiron walks over to the fridge, opening it up. He loved Kevin’s pancakes but he was sure omelets were the best way to go. He brings the carton to the counter, grabs a bowl and prepares to crack an egg.

“You really goin’ for the eggs again huh, Chiron You want pancakes again?” Kevin inquires, smile in his voice.

“I only need to watch once to get it, Kev. Trust.” Chiron says, hand hovering above the glass bowl. Kevin shrugs, up to his forearm in soap and suds.

“Aight…” he says. “Don’t fuck up.”

Chiron grins, cracking four eggs into the bowl before pushing it over to Kevin to inspect his work. Kevin leans over, staring for a bit before looking up at Chiron and nodding, impressed.

“I think you got somethin’, Black.” He says.

“Yeah…told yo’ ass too.” Chiron says grabbing the bowl back. “Don’t mean I know how to make omelets though.” Kevin washes his arms and shuts the water off, going to take over the bowl.

“Omelets? So that's whatchu tryna eat, huh?” Kevin asks, grabbing peppers and cheese. “Shit…my omelets are ‘bout to rock your world.”

Chiron sucked his teeth before taking over the dishes, warm water sprinkling on his stomach as the faucet came alive. "Maybe I could make you somethin' sometime, right Kev?"

A pause. Then laughter.

"Yeah, aight, Black."

"Don't laugh, nigga." Chiron says, acting like he's about to fling water at Kevin.

More laughter as the eggs get beaten and the dishes get cleaned.

Yeah, Chiron could get used to this.