Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

To most people, soulmate tattoos were exciting, or romantic, but to Adam, his was just annoying. To be fair, other people who had them had lovely little inscriptions scrawled on their wrists. Adam had once known someone who's read "I'm sorry to bother you but you have a beautiful smile" and while this was a bit long, he would much rather see a cute message about his smile than be reminded daily that his supposed 'soulmate's' first words to him would be, "FUCKING SHIT GANSEY", in all caps of course because the universe felt that was 100% necessary. Adam had no idea of course who Gansey was and he really did not want to know. He had taken to wearing a bracelet to cover his tattoo so he didn't have to think about his soulmate. Whoever she was, Adam was fine without her.

Ronan was pissed off. This wasn't particularly odd considering he was always pissed off, but today was one of those days he just needed something to be angry about. He decided on his soulmate tattoo. It was easy to be angry directly at it as opposed to other things as it was permanently stuck on his body against his will and read simply "lampshade". He didn't believe in soulmates but he still had that stupid word inked on his wrist. He twisted his leather bracelets around his wrist as if they could wipe it clear, but of course they couldn't. Ronan couldn't change anything.

Gansey was tucked away in a secluded corner of the school's library, knowing very well that there was a very small chance of his being interrupted. Not that he didn't like people. Gansey was generally considered a people person. He just needed time to pore over his notebook and, though he wouldn't admit it even to himself, mope at the lack of any new leads leads. Gansey was not aware that Ronan was looking for him, and even if he was he probably would have stayed in the library. It was the kind of day where Gansey needed to indulge in his complete obsession with Glendower. So he sat there, completely blissful and unaware. And he stayed.

Ronan was still pissed, and now he wanted to rant to Gansey about it. He didn't know what he was going to rant about but he wanted to. Tattoo, yeah. He would complain about that again. After all, Gansey didn't have one, most people didn't, and that would give him fuel.

Where was he?! When Ronan found him he was going to get an earful.

Through a doorway down the hall Ronan caught a glimpse of a boy who looked like Gansey and heard a very long word that Gansey would have used.

Got Him.

And he made his way to the door.

Adam was sitting in his class waiting for it to start. There were only three people in the room, so after he answered a history question for one of them he busied himself by doodling in his notebook and trying to look involved. The other two boys in the room were having an in depth conversation about what the taller boy was going to wear to his date that night.

"I don't know man, she's all into fashion and shit, so I have to wear something good." He raised his arm and dramatically displayed the shirt that was draped over it, apparently an option for his date, or possibly a piece of his great grandmother's curtains. "What do you think?" His friend shrugged

"What do I know about fashion?" The guy glared at his friend and, much to Adam's chagrin, turned his attention to the back of the room.

"What about you new kid? Be honest, how do I look?" He said draping the shirt over himself.

Adam decided that for this guy's own good he would tell the truth.

"You look like a-"

"FUCKING SHIT GANSEY"

"Lampshade."

Chapter Text

Chapter 2

Gansey was floored.

Literally.

One second he was sitting at a table in the library innocently looking over the ley lines on a crinkled old map, and the next he was laying face down on the abnormally clean library carpet.

“Where the hell have you been?”

Gansey was very suddenly and thoroughly reminded that he and Glendower were not the only two things in existence.

He really needed to get out more.

“Here…” Gansey checked his watch, thinking that ‘where he had been’ was pretty obvious considering Ronan had come to him, and realized that he had only ten minutes left of his free period before his next class started. “Have I done something wrong?

“Well for starters-”

“He’s just embarrassed.” Noah practically floated into the study room. “See, he thought this new kid was you, it was pretty funny actually cause this guy-”

“Do you not enjoy having your limbs attached to your body?” Ronan was seething. Noah ignored the empty threat and continued.

“Something about a lampshade, I don’t really know, not important, but Ronan bursts in, and anyways you didn’t do anything.”

“Noah did you just say la-”

“Shut up Dick.” Dick shut up.

Shutting up however did not mean Gansey would refrain from quietly laughing at Ronan’s expression. Maybe he was a bad friend, but he couldn’t help it. Ronan, the unshakeable Ronan Lynch, was embarrassed to meet his soulmate.

o-o-o

The first time Gansey learned about Ronan’s tattoo was by complete accident. Ronan never would have said anything if he were in his right mind, which of course he wasn’t. He was instead trying to drown his sorrows one shot at a time, not that he was measuring.

Gansey had decided that night, over a year ago now, to stay with Ronan as he drank. Something about his body language seemed worse than normal and he didn’t trust him not to do something stupid.

“You know, you’re kind of annoying right?” Ronan spoke after he had slowed down a bit. “What are you even doing here? Though I’m sure you are very well qualified, I don’t need a babysitter.” This didn’t particularly bother Gansey, he probably was kind of annoying. He also knew that Ronan was kind of annoying so it just kind of worked out in the end.

When Gansey didn’t respond he grimaced like a child being ignored. He fidgeted uncomfortably and twisted the leather bands at his wrists like they were shackles constraining him. Round and round they went until one finally snapped and plummeted to the ground. Ronan regarded it as if it were a trusted friend that had betrayed him after years of knowing one another. He twisted his wrist, checking to see if any others looked close to breaking.

That was when Gansey saw the writing. He couldn’t make any of it out at all, just see the letters snaking in between the remaining leather bands.

Ronan fidgeted more now, twisting the bands faster and more angrily. He looked like he was challenging them to break, like someone so without hope that they just waited for the next bad thing to happen that would validate how terrible they felt.

Another band snapped.

He continued again even angrier than before, twisting and wrenching the bracelets around. His wrists has started to become an angry red color.

Another snapped.

“Ronan.”

Snap.

“Ronan.” Gansey put his hand over his to him. Ronan made a face at him similar to that of a mocking toddler, but he let his hand relax.

Gansey looked once more and saw now a full word.

“Lampshade.” Ronan snorted. “What absolute shit.” A soulmate tattoo, Gansey realized. Ronan had a soulmate tattoo. “The powers that be decided that when I meet my soulmate-” He said the word soulmate like it was the most laughable thing he could think of, and at the same time like it burned on his tongue. “That when I meet my soulmate, the first thing he’s gonna say to me is ‘lampshade’. Bullshit.”

He

Gansey suddenly thought back to all the time he had spent desperately searching for Glendower. Had he not been paying attention to his own friend? How could he not have known? With rising panic he wondered if he would never find Glendower if he couldn’t even figure out his best friend was gay. He then felt incredibly ashamed of himself that his first thought, his first worry was about Glendower and not Ronan. Gansey didn’t realize how uncomfortable not worrying about Ronan was until he stopped worrying about him, even for just a moment.

…

When Ronan woke up the next morning he practically ran Noah down in his attempt to confront Gansey.

“You saw it didn’t you.” He looked angry, but not at Gansey really.

“The tattoo? Yes I did see it.” he looked up sleepily at Ronan, knowing he wouldn’t be able to hide the truth.

“Damn it. Damn you. Don’t watch over me like that anymore, Christ’s sake.” He looked less angry now and more nervous, or confused maybe.

“On the bright side it could have been in a much worse place. Really, for the both of us I’m relieved.” Ronan rolled his eyes, still looking uncomfortable.

“That’s- that’s it though right?”

“Sadly yes, or maybe happily. I’m not sure I would have wanted to find out you’d taken up interpretive dance and have had to sit through a demonstration. So, nothing embarrassing if that’s what you mean. I’ll have to find some other way to blackmail you now.” Ronan rolled his eyes again.

“Whatever Dick.” But he looked relieved. He spun out of the room then, grumbling as he went.

Gansey hadn’t lied, not really, it wasn’t embarrassing. All he had done was withhold a portion of the truth. Gansey didn’t care that he was gay, he just figured losing one secret might be enough for Ronan that night.

o-o-o

Adam was not at all sure how he felt.

As if having to pretend like he belonged at Aglionby with a host of obnoxiously rich boys wasn’t enough of a confusing ordeal, he had had the knowledge thrust upon him that one of those very same obnoxiously rich boys was apparently supposed to be his soulmate. It was off putting in addition to learn that one was bisexual not from personal experience and understanding of oneself but by the universe nudging you and whispering it in your ear.

No, it was not a whisper. It was quite literally a yell. Part of him felt cheated, that he had not gotten to experience this sort of thing like everyone else. Part of him also felt incredibly relieved. He wasn’t sure he was the type of person who had the luxury of figuring that sort of thing out happily on his own time, there was a very real worry in him that he might never have realized it. His experiences with love in all its forms were warped and tainted to the point where he wasn’t even sure he could recognize it.

Love. He hadn’t even spoken to this boy, not really, except to stammer out the rest of his confused sentence, and already because of a stupid tattoo he was using words like love. This boy, this wild and angry boy was supposed to be his soulmate. And despite it all, despite all of Adam’s best intentions, he felt almost excited. He dreaded having to see him again, what would have to happen, of course, but he still felt a flutter in his stomach he couldn’t make go away.

He sighed. All this and he still didn’t even know who the hell Gansey was. He was in for much more than he had bargained for.