Chapter Text
Hear me.
You claim to hear me screaming, but why? Why can you hear me screaming when I silence it with white lies and cover my tears up with a façade of laughter and pasted smiles?
Are you sure you hear me screaming? Hear me screaming out loud in the deepest parts of my mind never to surface out loud even if it's all I hear in my ears, it's like they're filled with water that I can't shake out and it makes my vision cloudy and my sentences slurred into what I think is the truth when really it's all a lie.
Is it me screaming you hear or is it really the screech of car tires as you stop it hastily, seeing my blood covered lifeless body in a pool of tar in the rear view mirror, getting out only to find I'm not there but in the back seat crying.
The car locks and its silenced. I'm in there screaming, but I'm also out there telling you I'm okay.
I'm screaming out of fear, anger, desperation, despair, everything that I can to get someone to notice, but you don't and never do.
You don't hear me screaming, you hear me laughing at my innermost self that's crumbling apart, you see this fake me I've sent out to fool you because if I'm discovered for who I really am, I'll never be able to go back.