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“Okay, Mike, I’m happy to report you’re in perfect health, although there is just one last thing on the agenda,” Dr. Paulson says. “I wouldn’t normally do a rectal exam on a man your age but—“
“Wait, what?” Mike thinks his eyebrows may have actually disappeared into his hairline. “Is that really necessary?”
“In your case, I’m going to say yes, because, as you well know, there’s history of prostate cancer in your family. So do me a favor and humor me. I’d just like to make sure everything feels normal and healthy. There’s nothing to be alarmed about. And the procedure itself is quick and painless.”
Sighing, Mike squints up at the multi-colored diagram of the male reproductive system on the wall to his left. He knew this day would come eventually – even if he figured he had at least another decade before having to submit to the humiliation.
“Slip off your underwear, turn around, and bend over the exam table.” He’s already in a gown so it’s easy enough to drop his boxers to the floor and kick them away with his foot. He follows the doctor’s instructions, grimacing at the embarrassing necessity of this singular invasion of his privacy, and braces his elbows on the table. “Good. Now squat down a little.”
Keeping his eyes fixed on the wall in front of him, Mike tries not to listen to the sound of lube being squeezed from the tube, nor to the doctor’s running commentary.
“That’s right, just relax,” the doc says, and that’s it, Mike’s body is being breached for the first time in his life and what a weird fucking feeling, not unpleasant but definitely not natural, and he knows he’s clenching tight around the finger, tense with discomfort, and then—
“Oh my God,” he blurts out.
And then he groans.
Because the spot Dr. Paulson just hit inside him, the very spot the doctor was aiming for, the spot the doctor is now currently stroking with his finger, has given Mike an instantaneous erection. His cock is fully, achingly hard, and it got that hard within the space of a second, it got hard so quickly Mike couldn’t have held in that deeply inappropriate groan if his life had depended on it. It’s mortifying how helplessly loud Mike’s groan was, as evidenced by Dr Paulson’s equally helpless burst of laughter. The fucker then tells him it’s perfectly normal but Mike can tell he’s full of shit because no way a doctor of his age and experience would be moved to laugh at something “normal” because that’s just unprofessional and Jesus fucking Christ what is this heavenly sorcery, this immense, outrageous pleasure, this wonderful glorious sensational bliss. The doctor’s massage feels so good Mike can’t bring himself to care that he’s thirty seconds shy of coming all over the inside of his gown. It’s probably a fortunate thing for everyone involved that the doctor removes his finger before that can happen, although all Mike feels is regret the exam is over.
And a little shame at that regret.
But mostly he’s just anxious to get the fuck out of the doctor's office so he can find the nearest restroom and jerk off.
~
It takes Mike one whole day before he caves to temptation, ducking out of work at the unacceptably early hour of six without so much as an explanation (he’ll deal with Harvey’s disapproval tomorrow if and when he finds out). He’d spent his lunch hour researching anal masturbation on his phone and come to the conclusion the best instrument for the job would be one designed specifically for such a purpose, as opposed to anything he already has in his possession, so he stops at Babeland on his way home and buys a prostate massager and some lube. This is the first sex toy he’s ever purchased – although not the first he’s played with. Rachel had a few vibrating dildos and he used to thoroughly enjoy getting her off with them. It amazes him they never even thought to try one of them on him, but he’s going to rectify that oversight very shortly.
His skin is already prickling hot with excitement, so he strips off all his clothes the moment he enters the bedroom, before perusing the apartment for the ideal place to do the deed. He decides the couch will work nicely: he can kneel up on it and brace his body against the back while he fucks himself with the dildo. Following the advice of the shop clerk he rolls a condom onto it before lubing it up, and then he slowly, slowly works the toy into his asshole.
Jesus.
There it is, that’s the spot. Nothing has ever felt this good before.
He wonders if the neighbors can hear his groans.
It takes no more than five minutes before he’s overtaken by the most intense, earth-shattering orgasm of his entire life. He literally sees stars. Drugs suddenly hold very little appeal.
Mike’s found his new hobby.
~
Things get antisocial after that. The next few months involve as much alone time as he can fit into his busy schedule, which, given his ridiculously long hours, allows him to get in only a few really good sessions a week. When masturbation involved mere jerking off he could be done within a few minutes, but now it usually takes him longer to climax – although the orgasms are approximately a thousand times more powerful and last much longer. They also leave him in a state not conducive to sleep – heart racing like he’s high on drugs, feeling fantastic and a little dozy but not exhausted or sleepy. The one time he decided to enjoy some late-night weekday rectal-love, he was done by midnight but couldn’t fall asleep until after two in the morning. So, sadly, he can’t get away with anal masturbation every single day, tempting as it always is.
Sometimes he uses just his fingers and thumbs, and he makes himself come like that on occasion, but while he enjoys the way that special little nub feels beneath his fingertips, the angles are a little awkward and it really is much easier with one of his toys. The best of which is the wall-mounted dildo he purchased on his third trip to Babeland. No more arm cramp, just kneeling on the floor and fucking himself on a dick – which, okay, is a little weird given his sexual orientation but man, straight guys the world over should get the hell over whatever dick-fear they might have because dick-shaped really is the way to go, and it’s just plain sad so many heterosexual men are missing out on the best sex they’ll ever have because they’re afraid getting fucked by a fake cock makes them gay.
He keeps his newfound obsession a secret from everyone but it’s a secret not without issues. As good as all the orgasms feel, it’s a pretty lonely hobby. The closest he gets to sharing it with another person is when he watches porn on his laptop while riding the dildo. Okay, it’s a pretty sad hobby. And he really does miss having sex with women.
There hasn’t been anyone serious in his life since Rachel left. After they gave up on trying to make things work long distance, Mike dealt with his broken heart by at first sleeping with as many different girls as he could find. When that didn’t make him feel better he went back to focusing entirely on work. And then, after a pep talk from Harvey, he made a conscious effort to strike some kind of balance.
Casual sex with an endless stream of random strangers is not an option for Mike the way it is for Harvey, because it leaves him feeling even lonelier than he did to start with. But drinking with Harvey once every couple of weeks, and going on dates with women he actually likes isn’t such a bad way to live. Mike’s good at dating – he enjoys getting to know new people and women generally like his company. So while most of the dates don’t progress beyond one evening, he probably ends up getting laid about fifty percent of the time, sometimes he’ll even get a second date out of it, and on very rare occasions he’ll find a new friend.
But since Mike’s fateful visit to the doctor two months ago he hasn’t been out with Harvey or gone on a single date, and it’s getting to a point where he’s starting to crave human company again.
What he really needs is the touch of a woman, so he hits on the cute barista who recently started at the coffee house down the block from his apartment. Fortunately he still remembers how to charm women and she soon agrees to go out with him.
The date goes well – she’s smart, pretty and good company. She’s also frank and forward, suggesting they go back to Mike’s place the moment the check’s paid.
He fucks her, and it’s nice. It’s really, really nice.
But it’s just not the same. It’s not as pleasurable, not as satisfying, not as good.
He likes her though, so he sees her a couple more times, and the third time he sleeps with her he asks her if she’ll finger his ass. Her reaction is not encouraging.
“Ew. Why would you ask me to do that?”
Funny how you can go off a person in the space of a sentence. “Because it feels good?”
It’s just awkward after that and Mike wonders if he’ll ever find a woman who’ll be willing to fuck him. Christ he misses Rachel. She’d have been up for it.
Hell, maybe he should just have sex with a man.
He’s at work when this thought occurs to him, walking up the stairs towards Harvey’s office, and it halts him in his tracks. Sitting down on the top step of the stairwell he contemplates such a proposition.
He’s not sexually attracted to men, but they do have the right equipment so regardless of attraction the sex would feel incredible. He likes the idea of another person being responsible for his pleasure and he likes the idea he could make someone else feel wonderful too. He’s always liked that about sex. But could he do it? Could he go through with it? Does it matter he’s not turned on by the male form? Theoretically he could shut his eyes and think about breasts and vaginas while the guy fucks him, but maybe that wouldn’t be fair to the guy. Then again, maybe the guy wouldn’t care – Mike knows he’s attractive and that there are tons of gay men out there who enjoy fucking straight guys, so it’d probably be relatively easy to find someone willing. The trouble is, finding a guy Mike would be willing to have inside him. There’s probably only one guy in the whole world Mike wouldn’t mind doing this with but that’s really not an option so he should probably just put this whole thing out to pasture and figure out some other way to combine his sexual needs with his attraction to women.
~
That Friday Harvey takes Mike out for drinks.
“What’s been going on with you?” Harvey says the moment the waitress has delivered their beers to their booth, a little accusation in his voice like he knows something’s up and is already sick of it. It’s not like Harvey gives much of a shit about the ins and outs of Mike’s private life, usually only enquiring after Mike’s well-being when it starts to affect Harvey in some way. Which is not even the case at all here – Mike’s work hasn’t suffered one bit – so maybe Harvey should drop the attitude.
“Nothing. Why would you think something is going on?” Can’t they just do what they usually do and have a drink together without sharing anything personal or meaningful with each other?
Harvey doesn’t answer with words. He just gives Mike a hard look – and yeah, who the fuck is Mike kidding? Harvey’s known something’s up since something came up, he just didn’t query it until now because he was hoping whatever it was would just go away.
“It’s embarrassing,” Mike says with a sigh. “I’m not telling you so quit looking at me like that. How about those Knicks, huh?”
But Harvey’s expression has morphed from irritated to intrigued. “Embarrassing,” he repeats, sounding a little bit too delighted. “Then we’re definitely not leaving here until you tell me.” Harvey’s smile is so arrogant and mischievous Mike can’t help but laugh.
“Then we’re gonna need more drinks,” Mike says.
The subject gets dropped for the time being, but after beer number two and whisky number one, Harvey says, “Tell me your secret.”
“Fuck,” Mike says, grinning despite himself. He shuts his eyes and shakes his head, a fizz of excitement bubbling in his belly. Truth is, he’s been dying to talk about this with someone, and even though no doubt Harvey will laugh in his face at least it’ll mean Mike can laugh about it too. “Fine.” He looks up at Harvey. “A few months ago I went to the doctor for a physical. And he, um…” Mike starts laughing. This is so fucking ridiculous.
“He what?”
He’s laughing as he says the words. “He gave me a prostate exam.”
Harvey’s eyes have widened a little but they’re still confused. “And that’s funny because…?”
“Harvey.” He lowers his voice to a half-whisper and leans forward, prompting Harvey to lean in too. “He…when he touched my prostate with his finger, I fucking groaned. I’ve never felt anything like it in my life. My dick got instantly hard and I swear to God, if the exam had gone on even ten seconds longer I would have come.”
“Jesus,” Harvey says, head reeling back slightly, mouth falling open.
“And I know I’m weird because the doctor laughed at me.”
Harvey begins to chuckle, but not in a mean way, and Mike feels a weight lifting. “I can’t believe your doctor laughed at you.”
“I probably would have been angrier about that if he hadn’t just shown me the time of my life.”
That makes them both laugh for a while, and when Harvey recovers his composure he says, “You know what, I’m actually envious. Prostate stimulation does not have that effect on me.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not exactly complaining, although it’s obviously not something I’ve been able to talk about with anyone else. Anyway, that’s why I’ve been kind of distracted the past few months. I’ve been…spending a lot of time alone, if you know what I mean.”
“So that’s what you’ve been doing.” Thankfully Harvey’s grin doesn’t contain a trace of judgment. In fact, there’s so much curious interest in his eyes Mike feels comfortable continuing his confession.
“Harvey, the orgasms. They’re so intense, nothing like…the normal kind. Sometimes they go on and on. And I don’t even need to touch my dick.”
“Wow. So you’ve been-“ Harvey stops, apparently considering his phrasing. “Fucking yourself.”
“Yep. Mostly I use a wall-mounted dildo, but I can get off with just my fingers – although it’s a little awkward. Thing is, I started dating this girl recently and the sex just wasn’t as good as it used to be, because all I could think about was how much I wanted to get fucked, how much better it feels, how much stronger the orgasms are. Only when I asked her to finger me she freaked out, so…”
“She freaked out about putting her finger in your ass? Lame.”
“Right?! But it makes me reluctant to ask for it again. Basically I want to find a woman who’d be willing to fuck me, but I can’t ask for that until I know her fairly well, but I don’t want to get to know someone and risk feelings developing between us until I know she’d be willing to fuck me.”
“That’s quite a catch-22.”
“Yeah.” Mike sighs. “Don’t judge me, I know this is crazy, but I’ve been considering maybe having sex with a man.”
“You are full of surprises today. Have you ever been attracted to a man?”
“Not in a ‘I want to sit on your dick’ kind of way, but the thought has become more appealing of late. Masturbation is all well and good but I miss the human connection you get from sex with another person, and even though I’m straight…I know for a fact it’d feel amazing.”
Harvey’s lips are pursed in amusement. “Mike, are you hitting on me?” His face breaks into a grin.
“What?” Mike laughs. Then he stops, trying to figure out how serious Harvey was being. Okay clearly it was just a joke so Mike starts laughing again. Or was it? He stops laughing, starts laughing again, stops and starts, and he honestly can’t fucking tell so he’s just going to have to ask. “Why, are you offering?”
And still in that same soft, teasing tone of voice, the inscrutable smile making it impossible to tell quite the extent to which Harvey is messing with Mike’s head. “You want me to fuck you?”
Well shit. No point lying to such a direct question. “If I had to choose anyone, it’d be you.”
Harvey’s smile fades, his eyes darken, he licks his lips. “Is that so?”
Face hot, cock stirring in his pants, Mike takes a slug of whisky and avoids eye contact until Harvey speaks again.
“I must admit,” Harvey says. “My curiosity is piqued.”
“What does that mean?”
“The responses you’ve described.” Harvey gestures towards him. “That’s something I’d like to see.”
This is getting confusing. Is Harvey offering to fuck him or just to watch him masturbate?
“Are you serious? You want to…watch…me…”
Harvey goes annoyingly quiet then, looking off into the distance, fingers of one hand stroking a circle on the back of the other. He’s contemplating something, and Mike needs to know exactly what that is so he doesn’t lose his damn mind.
“Harvey?”
“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Harvey says.
“Why not?”
“I’m your boss.”
“I don’t care about that. We break rules all the time. That’s how we do.”
“I know. But there are some lines we shouldn’t cross.”
“So let me get this straight. If you weren’t my boss you’d fuck me?”
If Mike’s not mistaken, Harvey just squirmed involuntarily in his seat, as if Mike’s words maybe turned him on just a little bit.
“Not the point.”
But now Mike’s interest is piqued. “Have you fucked men before?”
“None of your business.”
“Jesus Harvey I just told you the single most personal thing about myself, it’s your turn.
“Yes, I’ve been with men.”
Huh. Mike would never have guessed.
“And yes, if I weren’t your boss I’d fuck you."
Whoa. Okay then. For all intents and purposes they just admitted out loud they want to have sex with each other, even if their reasons for wanting it are still somewhat ambiguous. But the admission is out there. The one person in the world Mike would like to be fucked by has just told him he’s attracted to men, attracted to Mike, and would totally fuck him under different circumstances.
And now Mike’s dick is hard, because sometimes just the promise of pleasure is all it takes; also this being a terrible, dangerous idea that could backfire on them both in catastrophic ways, is making the prospect of it that much more appealing. “Should we go back to your place?” Mike says, because Harvey’s protests are laughable at this point. There is no way this is not going to happen.
“Mike, we can’t. Just forget I said anything.”
“Please, Harvey. I need to try it once with a human partner. We don’t have to make a big deal out of it.”
Harvey sighs. “Once,” he says, shaking his head.
“Yeah, once. We go home together tonight, tomorrow, we go back to being just friends.” Mike waggles his eyebrows at Harvey until he gets a laugh out of him.
“Okay listen. Tonight only, and then we never talk about it again.”
“Deal.”
Harvey pays for their drinks and then they go outside to hail a cab.
~
When they get to Harvey’s place, Harvey ushers Mike into the bedroom and tells him to get undressed and lie facedown on the bed. He doesn’t even try to kiss him which Mike feels mostly relieved about. Not because he’s not curious about what kissing Harvey would be like but Harvey is a guy and this will definitely be easier if they don’t get too intimate. If they just stick to the mechanics of it and avoid any and all things romantic then Mike might even be able to forget he’s having sex with a man and just enjoy the sensations Harvey’s maleness affords him.
Mike also finds it somewhat comforting Harvey hasn’t taken his clothes off. He’s nervous about seeing Harvey’s dick, and about what being naked with Harvey will mean – but Harvey’s apparently sensitive to the fact that Mike hasn’t been with a man before, and is doing all the right things in order not to overwhelm him.
Naked, Mike lies facedown on the bed and shuts his eyes. He’s no longer hard – his nerves on the ride home took care of that – but he lets out a sigh of pleasure when Harvey places a hand on his ass and begins to rub in gentle circles, squeezing the flesh, teasing the crack with his fingers. “That feels nice,” Mike mutters into the pillow.
“Spread your legs for me,” Harvey murmurs, and it’s so direct, it’s such a sexy thing to say Mike’s dick starts to stiffen again. He spreads his legs, moaning when Harvey’s fingertip skates over his hole. “Do you need to me to stretch you open with my fingers first? Or do you want my cock straight away?”
“Fuck, Harvey.” Now he’s hard. He considers Harvey’s question. He really doesn’t need fingers first – he fucks himself too regularly for that to be an issue, and anyway he likes the way it feels to start with a dildo; the stretch that sometimes almost burns a little is so fucking good he very rarely warms up with fingers when he’s on his own. “Your cock.”
Harvey sucks in a breath of air through his teeth. “That’s what I thought.”
Now Harvey’s undressing and Mike doesn’t dare take a peek. But when the bed dips again and nothing else happens, Mike opens his eyes and finds Harvey right there, lying next to him, a small smile on his face. He strokes Mike’s cheek with the back of his index finger.
“You should look,” Harvey says, indicating what he means with a pointed glance down at his own body.
“I know,” Mike replies, taking a deep breath. Harvey’s right – if Mike’s willing to have something – someone – inside his body he should be able to look at them.
Dragging his eyes away from Harvey’s face he lets his gaze travel down Harvey’s chest and belly until it reaches Harvey groin. Mike can hear himself breathing, surprised to find he’s actually excited by the sight of Harvey’s penis.
It’s already half hard, long and thick – a remarkably similar size to his favorite dildo actually – but unlike the toys Mike uses, it’s made of flesh, and it’s attached to a person he cares about.
“Touch it, Mike. Get it hard.”
Mike nods. It needs to be hard if it’s going inside him and that’s something Mike really wants, so touching it is a necessity, plain and simple. Harvey could do it himself but why should he? This is a favor to Mike and if Mike wants to be fucked he needs to give something back.
He reaches down and picks up Harvey’s cock, giving it a couple of firm squeezes and then he starts to move his hand back and forth. It’s not so alien, really. Harvey’s cock works just the same as Mike’s does – the more he strokes it the stiffer it gets – and even the angle is familiar after all those months putting condoms on dildos and applying them with lube. The first time he elicits a throaty noise of pleasure out of Harvey Mike feels both triumphant and aroused. Mike might be straight but there’s no doubt about it – Harvey is sexy as hell and Mike is thoroughly enjoying making him feel good.
And Christ. Mike’s own erection might have wilted but he’s so excited about the thought of Harvey’s cock going inside him he’s just broken out in a fresh sweat. “Are you ready?” Mike asks.
Harvey drags a thumb over Mike’s bottom lip and nods. “Yeah, I’m nice and hard now. Are you looking forward to this?”
Mike groans, whispers, “Yes.”
Harvey rolls a condom down over his cock and then slicks it up with a little lube. “Move to the edge of the bed and lie on your back with your legs spread and your knees bent,” Harvey says.
“Really?” Mike frowns. He assumed he’d be on his hands and knees.
“Yeah, really. I’m going to make you come by fucking you and I want to see that. If we do this front to back I won’t be able to see your face or your cock, which defeats the entire purpose.”
“Right, okay.” Makes sense. Mike shifts to the end of the bed and assumes the position.
Harvey slips off the bed and walks around it until he’s standing between Mike’s legs, drawing patterns on Mike’s taint and ass cheeks with the head of his cock. “Fuck me,” Harvey whispers, face slack with arousal. Mike strains forward, trying to get Harvey to do it, to just get inside him already, but Harvey seems to enjoy making Mike thrust his hips towards him because he keeps pulling back, just so Mike’ll do it again.
“Please, Harvey,” Mike chokes out.
He circles Mike’s hole with his cockhead for a few seconds. “You want it?”
“Yes. ”
Either he takes pity on Mike or he can’t hold back a second longer, pressing forward, and holy fuck the head of Harvey’s cock just entered him, opening Mike up, penetrating his body, slowly, slowly filling Mike’s hole. “Oh fuck,” Harvey says, staring down at himself as he pushes in deeper. “Fuck me.”
When Harvey hits the spot, Mike tips his head back and wails, pleasure rocketing through his body, causing him to seize up, hands curling into fists and hips rising off the bed.
“Jesus, Mike,” Harvey says, and when Mike is able to open his eyes again and find out what Harvey was commenting on, he sees Harvey gazing down at Mike’s belly, at his cock, which a second ago was mostly soft. Now it’s hard as a rock and leaking fluid, and every time Harvey’s cock hits that sweet, sweet spot Mike moans, groans, gasps, the bliss so immense, so intense he can’t fathom why he’d ever doubted sex with a man was the way to go.
Especially because Harvey knows exactly what he’s doing, moving in and out of Mike’s body in a perfect rhythm, fucking Mike’s ass like he was born for it. Mike’s orgasm has already started even though they’re only a minute or so in, gripping him faster than it usually does because Mike can’t hold back, and going by the hungry look in Harvey’s eyes Harvey wouldn’t want him to. Cream spurting from his cock onto his belly and chest in burst after burst, wave after wave, and thank fuck Harvey knows how to prolong it. He just keeps pounding inside, working Mike’s prostate with that incredible cock of his, making Mike come and come and come.
He’s stupid with it, unable to control the sounds he’s making, helpless against the pleasure, the orgasm going on and on, Harvey moving faster and harder, and it’s not until Mike is genuinely spent, his cock milked dry and his asshole so sensitive all he can do is whimper, that Harvey lets himself go, beautiful face twisting with pleasure as he comes with a series of breathy moans.
Harvey pulls out and falls forward, catching himself on his hands either side of Mike’s shoulders. Panting hard, he stares at Mike’s mouth and Mike wonders if he’s about to get kissed. But Harvey takes too long to decide so Mike cranes his neck and quickly kisses Harvey on the mouth before slumping back onto the bed. Harvey follows him though, catching his lips in another kiss, opening up Mike’s mouth with his tongue and not letting up until they’re both gasping for breath. They make out for a few minutes and it turns out kissing a guy is just as enjoyable as kissing a girl. And then Harvey pushes himself up to a standing position and peels the condom off his dick.
Once he’s tied it off and disposed of it in the en suite bathroom, Harvey returns to the bed, pulls back the covers and climbs inside, indicating Mike should follow suit. Eventually, he says, “Well?”
Mike smiles, feeling happier than he can ever remember feeling. “Amazing. By far the best sex I’ve ever had with another person.”
“Good.” Harvey looks pleased. “How does it compare to being alone?”
“Way better. Having someone share the workload helps, but also feeling connected to someone else is really pleasurable. I came quicker than I normally do.”
“I did wonder.”
“Did you, um…”
“Did I what?”
Mike frowns, feeling self-conscious. “Did you enjoy it?”
“Are you kidding? Yeah, I enjoyed it. The way you responded to my cock…Jesus Christ.”
Mike smiles. “Cool.” He’s not quite sure what he should do now though – Harvey invited him to get into bed so he supposes he’s allowed to stay the night, which, while more intimate than he was expecting, would be preferable to making the long journey back to Brooklyn. And he figures if Harvey really did enjoy it as much as he says he did then Mike is within his rights to impose.
Except he feels a little tense so maybe he should just go. No way will he be able to sleep until he knows Harvey’s okay with him being there.
“Do you want to stay the night?” Harvey asks.
“I don’t know.”
“You should. I’d like you to.”
This is new. A gentlemanly side of Harvey Mike had no idea existed but that makes a weird kind of sense. Normally Harvey would have no compunction about kicking Mike out of his house the moment he was done with him, but apparently he’s a lot nicer to the people he has sex with. For whatever reason knowing this makes Mike feel warm and safe, and attracted to Harvey in a whole new way. “’Kay,” he says, burrowing deeper under the covers, and closing his eyes.
The last thing he feels before drifting off to sleep is Harvey’s hand on his head, stroking his hair.
~
Waking up in a strange bed next to a naked man is about the most disconcerting thing that’s ever happened to Mike. He bolts upright and stares down at his bedfellow, lying on his front and facing away from Mike, still sleeping soundly.
Mike’s first instinct is to get up and dressed as quickly and quietly as possible, and get the fuck out of dodge, but he soon accepts this would not be an appropriate response to the situation he’s found himself in. The last thing he wants is for things to be awkward between him and Harvey and bailing without so much as a ‘goodbye’ would be a sure-fire recipe for uncomfortable tension come Monday morning.
Not that whatever morning-after conversation they’re going to have at some point soon isn’t going to be weird as fuck, but still, better to get it out of the way today than to let things stew the entire weekend. What Mike needs now is a moment or two on his own to think, and – he gives one of his armpits a quick sniff – a shower.
Naturally, Harvey’s bathroom is the fanciest Mike’s ever had the pleasure of using, so he makes the most of his time in there. He borrows Harvey’s electric toothbrush, and then spends about half an hour in the shower, sampling every single product on the shelves – Harvey has the nicest smelling body wash and of course he uses hair conditioner as well as shampoo. When Mike emerges from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist and his skin flushed from all the steam, Harvey is no longer in bed. Mike drops his towel on the floor and pulls on his clothes, before heading out of the bedroom in search of Harvey.
The smell of fresh coffee permeates the air and clues Mike in to what Harvey is up to. Following his nose, he finds Harvey in the kitchen, in a t-shirt, sweatpants and bare feet. Mike takes a seat at the bar and thanks Harvey for the coffee placed in front of him.
“Enjoy your shower?” Harvey says, pouring milk into Mike’s mug.
“God, yes. The water pressure in this place is out of control. I could have stayed in there all day.”
Harvey doesn’t reply but he looks vaguely amused.
“I’ll get out of your hair in a second.”
“No rush. You want some breakfast?”
“Nah, I’m cool. Thanks.” In his desperation to make as quick an exit as possible without being rude, Mike manages to burn the roof of his mouth on his coffee, and then nearly trips over his own feet when he hops off the stool to leave. Thankfully Harvey doesn’t walk him out, he just says, “See you Monday,” and when Mike mutters out a mortifying, “Thanks…for…everything,” Harvey just rolls his eyes.
~
Freedom.
Now Mike has escaped the Den of Awkwardness, he can reflect on the previous night’s shenanigans at his leisure.
He had sex with a man.
He had sex with Harvey.
He had sex with Harvey who also happens to be his boss and his closest friend.
Harvey fucked him.
Harvey fucked him well.
And he hadn’t been kidding when he told Harvey it was the best sex he’d ever had with another person.
Does that mean he should continue having sex with men? He may not be psychologically oriented that way but his body certainly prefers it. It’s almost like his mind is straight and his body is gay which seems unfair but it is what it is. The problem is, the thought of being with another man holds little to no appeal. He’d happily sleep with Harvey again, because he trusts Harvey and for a dude Harvey is extremely attractive, only they’d agreed that wasn’t an option. Apparently they’re just going to forget it ever happened or some shit.
Oh well. At least he still has his dildos.
~
Apart from a brief period of shyness on Mike’s part, things with Harvey on Monday morning are basically fine. Harvey is still Harvey – he treats Mike to a glimmer of a knowing smile then swiftly moves on to barking orders at him like absolutely nothing is different.
Phew.
On Wednesday night after work, Mike decides to have a session with his dildo. It’ll be the first time he’s played with himself since Friday and he’s practically giddy with anticipation. He groans as it fills him up and the pleasure is as overwhelmingly wonderful as ever, but it gets even better about halfway through when he pulls up a picture of Harvey in his mind, the exact way he’d looked when he was fucking Mike, pounding into him with his perfect cock and Christ almighty now Mike’s coming, rocking back on Harvey’s cock and coming hard all over the paper towels laid out on the floor in front of him.
~
By Saturday evening Mike’s both horny and restless, and while he knows a good, long session with the dildo would alleviate most of that pent-up tension, he’s stopped from indulging by a disturbingly insistent urge to see Harvey instead. Even though he just spent the past five days with him at the office.
Calling is not an option because there’s a good chance Harvey will have no interest in talking to him on the phone, so, ill advised as it probably is, Mike jumps on his bike and cycles to Manhattan, locks up the bike outside Harvey’s apartment block and heads upstairs.
He’s probably not even home. Harvey often works through the weekend, although he gave Mike the weekend off which suggests he’s not at the office because he generally insists on Mike being there whenever he is. Mike knocks on the door, heart pounding, and waits forty five seconds before going in for a second round. He’s got his fist hovering in mid-air when the door swings open. And there’s Harvey, casually dressed in jeans and a navy blue Henley, wearing his patented ‘what the fuck are you doing here?’ expression, that Mike has come to expect every time he turns up on Harvey’s doorstep unannounced.
“Hey, can I come in?” Mike says, walking past Harvey without waiting for an invitation.
“Be my guest,” Harvey says, following Mike into the house.
Mike stops, turns around and waits until Harvey is standing in front of him, within touching distance.
“What are you doing here?”
The words come out slow and measured, mostly because Mike hasn’t remotely planned what he’s going to say. “I just wanted to talk to you about something. Maybe propose something to you. I know we said some stuff the other day and I, you know, I agree with the sentiment completely, because I think it’s really important that whatever happens we maintain a successful working relationship because what we have is special and I would never do anything to jeopardize that and I know you wouldn’t either because you’re smart and experienced and hey, I still have a lot to learn from you, I’m well aware of that believe me—”
“Spit it out Mike.”
“Sorry.”
Harvey just raises an eyebrow and waits.
“I want you to fuck me again.”
“Mike,” Harvey says, a note of chiding in his tone, but he hasn’t moved away and he doesn’t look uninterested.
“I tried it with the dildo the other night and it’s just not the same. It’s not as good.”
Harvey’s lip quirks up to the side. “I should hope not.”
“Harvey,” Mike implores, keeping his voice soft and breathy for effect. “I need it. What am I supposed to do?” Throwing himself at Harvey’s mercy, framing his plight in the terminology of addiction, is a play he knows will totally weaken the resolve of an egomaniac like Harvey.
“You need it, do you?” Mike can hear Harvey breathing.
“Please. I know we said it was just a one-time thing, but I’m going out of my mind here. I really, really need it.”
“What do you need, Mike?”
Mike steps forward, leans in until his cheek is nearly touching Harvey’s and murmurs into his ear, “I need your cock.”
Harvey grabs him by the scruff of his t-shirt and shoves him back a few paces. “This is way too complicated, Mike. You can’t be coming over here whenever you feel like it, begging for sex.”
“I know, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again, I promise.”
“You promise?”
“Yes.”
“So this is the last time. Okay?”
“’Kay.”
“Okay then.” Harvey nods towards the bedroom. “Go.”
Mike is so excited he has to force himself to walk instead of run, and as soon as the door is shut behind them he strips off all his clothes in record time and bends over the bed, one knee up on the mattress, the other foot on the floor, his thighs spread wide in invitation. He wants Harvey inside him now and he’s so turned on he’s already moaning with anticipation.
There’s a hand on the small of his back. “Mike, stop.” Harvey sounds amused. “I'm not a piece of meat. I need a little foreplay.”
Sheepish, Mike turns around. “Oh. Sorry.”
“Don’t be. Come here.”
Mike shuffles forward until he’s seated on the edge of the bed, his legs dangling over the side. Harvey grips the side of Mike’s neck and stoops down to kiss him on the mouth.
Turns out kissing Harvey before they have sex is a markedly different kind of fun from the lazy post-sex make out session they partook in the other day. Where before it was about rounding off the experience by sealing it with a kiss, this is all about intensifying their arousal, something Mike wouldn’t have thought possible he’s so goddamn horny, but the way Harvey responds to Mike’s kisses, the way he gets more and more into it, opening his mouth wider, pushing his tongue deeper into Mike’s mouth, breathing heavier and louder and faster, a knee up on the bed to get closer to Mike’s body…it’s all so fucking sexy Mike can’t imagine why a few minutes ago he didn’t want any foreplay. Harvey pushes Mike onto his back and straddles him, still fully dressed but apparently unwilling to stop kissing, and he seems to like the way Mike arches his body against him and grinds his bare dick against Harvey’s denim-covered crotch.
“Look how desperate you are,” Harvey says, teeth scraping over Mike’s throat. “Love how much you need my cock.”
They roll around on the bed for a while, and it’s not so different from fooling around with a girl except for the part where Harvey doesn’t have any breasts to fondle – but as far as Mike is concerned the lack of breasts are more than made up for by the big cock Harvey has between his legs, that Mike rubs at through the rough material whenever he gets a chance.
Mike tugs at Harvey’s shirt, helping him pull it up over his head and down his arms. Then he attacks the fly of Harvey’s jeans. Got to get him naked. Got to get him inside.
Stroking Harvey’s bare cock is not so daunting the second time round. It feels great in Mike’s hand actually – exactly like everything he’s been wanting every second for the last seven days, and now he’s finally got it, and it’s hard and hot and the tip’s all dark and wet and swollen, and ready to rock Mike’s world. God Mike hopes he’s ready.
A hot whisper in Mike’s ear, “How much do you want it?”
“Fuck Harvey, please. Don’t fucking tease me.”
“Tell me.”
“I want it. I want it so badly I’m losing my goddamn mind.”
“You better earn it then.”
“What do you mean?”
“You need to show me exactly how much you want it.”
“How?”
“Suck it.”
Mike gulps, pulls back his hand and stares up at Harvey. “I, um…” He’s not sure he can do that.
“What do you think this is, Mike?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well it’s not a free hand-out. I want those pretty lips of yours around my dick. I want you to show me just how much you love having my cock inside you. Is that going to be a problem?”
If he can touch it, if he’s willing to have it up his ass, he should be able to put it in his mouth. And hell, if he sucks Harvey’s cock then there’s a good chance Harvey will suck Mike’s, which would be no bad thing. Mike shakes his head.
“Good.” Harvey reclines on his back, legs splayed open.
Scooching down the bed until Harvey’s cock is at eye level, Mike holds it in his hand, gives it a good hard look and considers what he’s about to do. The crazy thing is he actually really wants to suck it, although he’s not sure if that’s more about desire, gratitude or submission. He might rather fantasize about cunts than cocks but the appendage currently throbbing in his fist is responsible for Mike’s ultimate pleasure and he feels uncommonly attached to it. It also turns him on how much Harvey wants him to do this; and being ordered to, having it used as ransom – if Mike doesn’t suck Harvey’s cock Harvey won’t fuck Mike’s ass – is making the prospect of getting up close and personal with male genitalia for the first time exciting in ways he’d never have anticipated.
The first lick across the silky, swollen head leaves Mike lightheaded with lust. He can hardly believe he’s actually doing this – this is so much gayer than getting fucked, Jesus – and is turned on by it. It helps that the sound Harvey makes in response to Mike’s tongue is so sexy, as is the way Harvey puts his hand on Mike’s head when Mike dips down further, taking as much of the length into his mouth as he can. He gets a rhythmic bob going, relishing the sensation of the thick, smooth rod sliding over his tongue, leaving a trail of salt and bitter, the head hitting the back of his throat again and again and again.
Harvey grunts and sighs, whispers, “Uhh that’s good…so fucking good…fuck me you’re a natural…don’t stop…” and it’s okay, Mike won’t stop, because he’s actually enjoying himself. Because getting Harvey off is almost as fun as the reverse. Squeezing Harvey’s balls in his hand, teasing his taint with his fingers, Mike releases Harvey’s cock from his mouth and then proceeds to lick every inch of it. He wants to show Harvey just how much he appreciates that big cock; that he loves it so much he’ll smother it with wet kisses, give it the wettest, messiest tongue bath imaginable. He’s feeling so amorous he even sucks on Harvey’s balls, before hooking Harvey’s legs over his shoulders, spreading his ass cheeks with his fingers and dragging his tongue over Harvey’s puckered hole.
This apparently excites Harvey too much, because he grabs Mike by his arms and hauls him up the bed, before climbing onto his back and thrusting his cock up and down between Mike’s ass cheeks. “Fuck you’re driving me crazy. Gonna fuck you now. You’ve earned it. Make you come so hard for me.”
And then he’s off Mike’s back and a second later Harvey’s face is buried in Mike’s crack and Mike can feel the wet rasp of Harvey’s tongue swirling around his asshole, the tip pressing inside. There’s a finger entering him now too and that’s it, oh jesus, Harvey’s stroking the spot and Mike can hear the noises he’s making but he can’t control them at all – they’re like some delirious combination of groaning, sobbing and choking – nor can he control his hips which are moving non-stop, desperately fucking back onto Harvey’s mouth and fingers.
When Harvey breaks away and Mike’s left empty he calls out, “Hey!”, twisting his head around in outrage. But there’s no need to panic because Harvey is donning a condom and slicking himself up like he’s on a race for his life. And then he’s on Mike’s back again, pushing his cock into Mike’s ass.
God Mike’s going to start coming soon and there’s nothing he can do about it, especially not with the way Harvey is sliding in and out of him with these long, slow, hard strokes that pound against his prostate, sending lightning bolts of pleasure through his groin. Harvey’s mouth is on Mike’s neck, and he talks breathlessly, “You feel so good…you feel so fucking good…god you’re amazing…are you coming yet? Oh fuck me I need to see it…”
With that, Harvey pulls out and orders Mike to straddle him and ride his dick. Better this way so Mike can control the pace and he and Harvey can see each other. Almost the moment he sits down in Harvey’s lap, his ass filled to the brim with Harvey’s big, beautiful cock, come spurts out of his dick and lands on Harvey’s stomach. The bliss of orgasm overtakes him and Mike loses all sense of time and place, it’s just him and Harvey, his ass and Harvey’s dick, the unbearable pleasure that refuses to stop as Harvey bucks up and up and up, talking Mike through it, telling him he’s perfect and fuck that dick and come all over me and my sweet gorgeous boy. And just as Mike thinks he’s going to pass out from the intensity of the pleasure Harvey gasps out, “Oh fuck I’m coming,” and he’s coming too, his head thrown back and his eyes squeezed shut.
Harvey cleans up quickly and returns to bed, settling in and engaging Mike in a lengthy, leisurely make-out session. This time Mike doesn’t wait for an invitation to stay, he just wraps his body around Harvey’s and says, “I’m allowed to stay right?” To which Harvey responds, “Of course.”
~
Things the next morning are much more relaxed than last time. Mike doesn’t feel awkward or freaked out, and he accepts the offer of breakfast without hesitation. The only reason he leaves as early as he does – just after eleven – is because he doesn’t want to outstay his welcome, not because he actually wants to go.
~
And that’s it. Mike didn’t think he’d ever fall in love again after Rachel left, but it’s starting to look as though that thought might have been premature. Since meeting him Harvey has never been too far from Mike’s thoughts but this is different – now Harvey’s all he can think about, now he’s obsessed with the man. Okay it’s partly a sexual thing – sex has never been this transcendent – but it certainly doesn’t hurt that Mike loves Harvey as a person, as a friend, because it means that when the sweat dries he’s still in the company of his favorite person in the whole world. In the days following the weekend Mike wakes up excited, giddy about the prospect of seeing Harvey, and about the possibility that at some point soon he and Harvey will end up back in bed.
Not that that’s allowed, of course – technically Saturday was the last time they were supposed to have sex. But Mike’s pretty damn certain they were full of shit when they agreed to that, and that seducing Harvey again will be like taking candy from a baby. Mike’s got a photographic memory, he can relive every second of his recreational time with Harvey whenever he wants to, and there’s no denying Harvey loved fucking Mike. Which means, no matter what he might have claimed, Harvey will want to fuck Mike again.
Mike lets things simmer until Wednesday and then corners Harvey in the elevator after work.
“Where you going?” Mike asks.
“Home.”
“Okay.”
“Okay what?”
“Okay I’ll come home with you.”
“I don’t recall extending an invitation.”
“You didn’t. But I know you want me to.”
Harvey is fighting a smile and losing badly. “Don’t you have work you should be doing?”
Yeah but he’s really not in the mood. “I figured you could have a word with my boss.”
“You don’t think he’d understand?”
“No way. He’d probably want to punish me for leaving work so early.”
“Hm. Well if he wants to punish you it’s likely because you deserve it.”
Mike nods. “Point.” The elevator doors open at the ground floor and neither of them budges. Mike gives Harvey a meaningful look and speaks in a low voice. “I do deserve it.”
“You better come with me then.”
They exit the building side by side.
~
They don’t go straight to bed when they get to Harvey’s, they eat together and talk about their day, and then, before Mike has even considered making the first move Harvey walks over to him and takes his hand. “Come on,” Harvey says, leading Mike to the bedroom, this time without paying any lip service to the whole stupid ‘this is a bad idea and we need to stop’ meme that Mike is so completely done with at this point.
And, hallelujah, Harvey seems to be as well, because on Friday evening it’s not Mike who suggests they go home together. Harvey stops by Mike’s cubicle on his way out of the office, and says, quiet and deadpan, “My place?”
Mike nods and quickly gathers up his things.
Doesn’t leave Harvey’s apartment for the entire weekend.
It continues like this – two or three hook-ups per week – and after a month Mike is thinking of Harvey as his boyfriend. Not that Harvey would tolerate such a provincial label so Mike keeps that to himself.
Harvey’s more affectionate than Mike would have predicted him to be, but he’s still an unsentimental prick, outright refusing to admit to Mike’s face they’re in a serious relationship. Not that Mike doubts Harvey’s feelings for him – Harvey sucks at telling but he’s gifted at showing – because while Mike’ll probably never hear those three little words come out of Harvey’s mouth, when an envelope containing a key to Harvey’s apartment reaches Mike through internal mail, with a note scribbled on a post-it attached to the envelope that says simply, “it’s your turn to buy milk” Mike knows exactly where he stands.
They’re as discreet as possible at work although tongues are definitely wagging. Mike doesn’t care.
Because on the nights he spends with Harvey not only does he get fucked within an inch of his life, he gets kissed and cuddled and petted. He gets dinner and wine and conversation. He gets laughter and friendship.
He gets love.
~fin~