Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The club's lights were dim, the atmosphere thick of sweat, and the dance floor was full of men, old and young, all enjoying the beat of the music. 

Kurt loved it. He took a sip of his scotch, watching dozens of hot men dancing the night away, under the influence of booze and probably of running away from something. 

"Hey there, killer," a vaguely familiar voice came up behind him. Kurt turned around to see, the one and only, Sebastian Smythe. 

"Oh fuck you." Kurt spat as he downed his glass in one go. 

"Hey hey, I don't have bad intentions. You just look really, really hot from where I was looking." Sebastian winked. "But really. It's been a while." 

Kurt squinted at him, but decided to give the man benefit of the doubt. 

"Do you want to dance?" Kurt offered. "I mean, might as well do it while we're here." 

Sebastian smiled as he finished his beer. "Why, I thought you'd never ask." He took Kurt's hand in his and kissed the knuckles, then led the shorter man to the floor, immediately getting his hands all over Kurt. 

They danced for quite a while, people came and went, the music changed, and they were still on the floor, grinding at each other, hands all over, as the air got hotter between them. 

"Maybe you're not that bad after all," Kurt whispered to his ear as they grinded along with the music. 

"Oh boy, I am bad." Sebastian whispered back, while nibbling on his ear. "I can be really bad." 

Kurt moaned. He'll never tell the man, but damn if he didn't have a soft spot for ear biting. 

"I take you like this?" Sebastian continued to nibble on Kurt's ear, his hand traversing to Kurt's back down to his behind, squeezing a handful as he kept biting his ear. 

"Seb— ah, fuck," Kurt clawed on his arm, grinding even harder, pressing his body closer to Sebastian. 

"Bathroom?" Sebastian took his hand. Kurt could merely nod as the next second he realized, his pants were puddled around his knees and Sebastian was below him already. 

This wasn't how he wanted his night to end, but he wasn't complaining. Sebastian really did give a great head. 

Chapter Text

It was Friday evening, just before he locked in for the day, when Kurt got the text. 

Incoming - from Unknown

5:24 PM

Hey there, killer. Remember me?

Kurt smiled. Of course he remembered the best weekend he's ever had the past few months. 

Outgoing - to Unknown 

5:26 PM

I don't know, what did you do exactly for me to remember you? 

He didn't check his phone again until he plopped on his couch at his small flat, with hot chamomile tea on the table and a rerun of America's Next Top Model on the tv. 

Incoming - from Unknown

5:31 PM

Aw, don't go and hurt my feelings.

Right, he hadn't changed the name. 

Outgoing - to Meerkat

7:12 PM

You have feelings? 

Incoming - from Meerkat

7:15 PM

Naww :( 

7:16 PM

I was wondering 

Uhh 

Outgoing - to Meerkat 

7:16 PM

Yes? 

Incoming - from Meerkat

7:17 PM

Would you like to go out tomorrow? 

Just coffee and lunch

7:18 PM

You don't have to say yes

Kurt smiled. He was going to stay inside anyway. 

Outgoing - to Meerkat 

7:21 PM

Actually, I was going to say why not. 

Where and when? 

Incoming - from Meerkat 

7:22 PM

Really?? 

I mean of course you'll say yes, no one can resist me

Umm

Katie's Shop? It's a small shop a few blocks away from CP. Hipstery but it's probably the best Italian coffee you could ask for in Manhattan

Incoming - to Meerkat 

7:24 PM 

Don't make me take my words back. 

But yeah, I think I know that. 11 good? 

Outgoing - from Meerkat

7:25 PM

Kuuuurt. 

7:27 PM

See you tomorrow then. 

Kurt wouldn't tell this too, but he went to bed with a huge smile on his face. 

***

"It's just Sebastian, Kurt. He would barely give a damn. Don't fret." 

Kurt was mumbling as he straightened his shirt for the third time. After a few hours, he finally chose a navy shirt with black skinny jeans, black boots and a white scarf. 

He already called Elliott frantically at eight because he didn't know what to wear. It was bad to the point he nearly cancelled, but his friend finally calmed him down and told him to lay low for this time. 

"Okay. Okay. It's just coffee. It's not a date. I'm not dating Sebastian Smythe." Kurt mumbled over and over as he took his bag and bolted out the door. It was half past ten. He's going to be late. 

***

Kurt did run late. His phone read 11:13 when he opened the door into the shop. It wasn't hard for him to find Sebastian as the man was sitting next to the door, his face covered behind his silver laptop. 

"Hey, thanks for waiting," Kurt said as he sat down at the table. 

"Huh?" Sebastian abruptly looked up from his laptop. "Oh, yeah, no biggie. I was busy with this anyway. Why don't you go get some coffee while I finish this up? I've told Katie you're with me." 

"Okay," Kurt shrugged as he lined up to order his coffee. When he came back, Sebastian were still busy with his laptop. 

"You know, if I'm disturbing you we can always postpone," Kurt said as he sipped his coffee. It was really good. 

"No, no! It's just a case I just closed yesterday. Just a few words and... yeah, done." Sebastian closed his laptop. "Sorry, I'm still a junior associate. Everyone still drops their paperwork at me." 

Kurt nodded. "I thought you're almost 30?" 

"31, actually. I didn't have a quick start at this. I just started about four years ago." Sebastian said as he put his laptop to a backpack on his feet. 

Now Kurt felt underdressed. Sebastian was wearing a light pink button down with a black coat, blue tight jeans that wrapped around his legs at the right places, and his hair was immaculate. 

"You look good," Kurt said without thinking twice. 

"Huh? Oh. It's nothing. I just put on random stuff that works." Sebastian shrugged. "You look better," he winked. 

If Kurt didn't feel blood rushing to his cheeks, now he felt it. 

"So, what's up for the past ten years with Kurt Hummel?" Sebastian started. "I think I've heard of your name once or twice since I'm in this city." 

"I work at Vogue. Blogger. I was married to Blaine for a year then it didn't work out again. And now I'm on a coffee date with Sebastian Smythe." Kurt took a big gulp of his coffee. "You?" 

"Well, I work at my family's law firm. I'm still at the bottom of the chain though. Ummm... you mentioned Blaine?" Kurt nodded. "I was dating him up until three months ago I think? It wasn't long. I couldn't stand him. I can't believe I had tried so hard to woo him in high school." 

Both of them snickered. "But you, though. I regretted not trying to woo you. Because damn if I am not captivated with the person I'm talking to." Sebastian winked again. 

"Aaaand here I thought you have changed." Kurt let out a loud sigh but he still smiled. Sebastian laughed for a while. 

"I did change to a better looking man." He winked. "But I think compared to who I was in high school, I've actually changed." 

"Well considering I let you touch me, I think so too." Kurt squeezed Sebastian's hand on the table as he took another sip of his coffee. 

Kurt expected the other man to pull away, but instead he squeezed his hand back. They stayed there in silence, holding each other's hands, sipping their respective coffee to the bottom. 

"It's a cold day." Sebastian mumbled. 

"What? Is little Sebby afraid of a little cold?" Kurt teased. He was met by an eye roll and a stifled laugh. 

"No, I had a plan to go on an Italian restaurant that would fit well to eat outside." Sebastian said as he fiddled with his phone, his other hand still holding Kurt's tightly on the table. 

"What about Wong's Wok? They serve a mean fried noodles." Kurt offered. 

"Nah, I just had that for my lunch yesterday." Sebastian shrugged. "By the way, where do you work?" 

"I just told you, Vogue." Kurt rolled his eye back. 

"No, I mean, Isabelle's Vogue? Or is there any Vogue that I don't know in New York?" Sebastian put his phone down and looked straight at Kurt.  

"Um, yes. Isabelle Wright is my boss. Why?"

Sebastian shook his head as he continued fiddling with his phone. "Nah, just wondering." A quick pause, "Have you ever tried rendang?" 

"Ren what?" Kurt looked at him weirdly. 

"Rendang. It's Indonesian. You've never heard of it? It's divine. As long as you can stand the spice, of course." Sebastian looked as if he was explaining the food from heaven as his hand was grabbing at his backpack. 

"Uhh?" Kurt scratched the back of his head. "I know it's a country somewhere?" 

"Jesus Christ, Kurt. Where have you been? Okay, I'm taking you out for rendang. Trust me, you'll love this. I know a place." Kurt's hand Sebastian was holding was suddenly in the air as Kurt was being pulled outside by Sebastian in a hurried manner. 

"Hey hey hey, chill out! My legs aren't as long!" Kurt scolded. 

"Oh, I didn't realize I was pulling you that hard," Sebastian shrugged and took his hand away. "Sorry. We're just going to the parking lot behind." He pulled out car keys from his pockets, pressing the unlock button to hear an answer from a black Jaguar. 

"You drive a Jag." Kurt commented. 

"Yes. XJ, 2014. Come on in." Sebastian held the passenger door open for Kurt. It wasn't long for Kurt to wait inside until the car owner comes in. 

"What's with the look?" Sebastian asked while placing his bag under the behind of his seat. 

"Huh? It's just, whoa. I've never been in one of these before." Kurt said meekly. 

"Wait until you hear her." Sebastian winked as he turned the engine on. A roar came from the engine and Kurt did look as if he had the best head in his life. 

"Oh come on, you're not that easy to get are you?" Sebastian teased as he pulled away and into the streets. 

"What?"

"You just said her sounds make you feel like you just had the best blowjob in your life, Kurt Hummel." Sebastian smirked, "You would know, because I just gave you exactly that a week ago," and winked. 

How many times have Kurt blushed today, again? 

"Shut up, Smythe." 

***

“Okay, this is the best food I’ve ever had.” Kurt moaned as he licked off the remaining sauce on his spoon.

“You have only tried one food, Kurt. This place has thirty something more.” Sebastian snickered as he finished his own plate. “I noticed you haven’t even drank your tea.”

“Huh?” Kurt looked over to the right side of the table. “Oh, yeah. I don’t really drink in the middle of eating.” He took a sip of his tea and his eyes were opened to better choices in life, to say the least. “Oh my god.”

“See.” Sebastian winked as he took a big gulp of his own tea. “Asians, man. They make better food than us. We should thank them.”

Kurt finished half of his glass and put it down a little too hard on the table. “Maybe I’ll consider a rendezvous to Indonesia now and eat every food they have.”

“Will you consider a partner to get lost with?” Sebastian asked.

“What? Oh, yeah, maybe a stray cat I’ll befriend there and we’ll go on an adventure together. Food adventure.” Kurt slumped on his chair, behaving un-Kurt-ly, tapping his full belly like he’s not going to eat more for the rest of the year.

“Oh, come on. I’m better than a stray cat.” Sebastian frowned playfully.

“A friendly meerkat is probably on the same level as a stray cat.” Kurt slapped the other man’s arm and scoffed, but it was clear he was nowhere near being annoyed.

“A friendly, rich, handsome meerkat? I’m probably more on the disobedient house cat level.” He winked and finished his tea. “Ready to go?”

“Wait, wait! The tea is too good to be left alone!” Kurt immediately took big gulps of his tea and followed the other man who has already went to the front door.

“What was that tea again? I’ve never had anything like that.” Kurt grabbed Sebastian’s arm and absentmindedly held his hand.

Sebastian was shocked at first to have someone’s hand in his, but it didn’t take long for him to get used to it. He even tugged Kurt’s hand so the other wouldn’t take it back. “Javanese black tea.”

“Isn’t that where coffee comes from too?” Kurt asked.

“You do realize that one place can make more than one great things, right?” Sebastian asked back.

“Ugh, I hate you.” Kurt pinched the other man’s arm. “Where are we going now?”

“I’m going to take you home, then I’ll go home.” Sebastian squeezed his hand. “Maybe I can stay over for a little snack before I go?”

“Okay.” Kurt tried to hide his disappointment for not having more time to spend with Sebastian. Sue him if you must, but he did enjoy this Saturday.

Chapter Text

Sunday came and went and on Monday, Kurt was stuck on a line for his coffee before he went to work.

Outgoing – to Meerkat

7:42 AM

Help. The line isn’t moving.

It was a split second decision to text Sebastian, but he couldn’t stop it. It also didn’t take long for the other man to answer his text.

Incoming – from Meerkat

7:44 AM

Sucks to be you. I got mine by asking the people to deliver it to my office. :p

Outgoing – to Meerkat

7:45 AM

Fuck you.

Incoming – from Meerkat

7:47 AM

I thought you’d never ask. When and where?

Kurt rolled his eyes, fingers ready to type a reply, when the person in front of him finally moved and he was face to face with the barista. Thank fuck, he thought.

The text was left forgotten as he ran to his building and his floor, barely 30 seconds before 8. He let out a big huff of breath. Back to work, he supposed.

***

At around 1, after enjoying a carton of Wong’s Wok and an enraged fangirl, Tina the receptionist went in the room with a huge bouquet of flowers.

“Guess who got flowers!” Her sandy blond hair waved behind the flowers that were engulfing her face, but no one could best her squeaky voice, especially when a gossip was around.

“Marisol?” Kurt called.

“Jamie!” Someone else said.

“Nope!” Tina let a giggle out. “Kurt is seeing someone! Look how huge this is!” Tina said as she put down the bouquet on Kurt’s table.

“Wait, what?” Kurt raised an eyebrow, confused. Who would send him flowers? Flowers this much and this big? He searched for a card and finally found one hidden between the colorful roses.

I thought you’d like this. S

“Oh.” Kurt could feel blood rushing to his cheeks once again and smiled. It wasn’t long until his face fell and he realized he didn’t reply Sebastian’s text. “Fuck.”

Outgoing – to Meerkat

1:01 PM

HEY

I love the flowers!

Sorry I missed your text, I was running late

Thank you so much though :)

“Soooo, who’s the lucky guy?” Tina sat on top of the table, shoving some note books aside to not ruin any project Kurt had.

“No one.” Kurt looked at Tina’s eyes flatly, though it didn’t need an expert look to see that he was hiding it.

“Mmmkay, say what you will.” Tina flipped her hair as she turned around back to her station.

When Tina finally was out of his sight, Kurt inspected the flowers and smelled it. It was good. He took the bouquet and went to the pantry, looking for anything to put it in and bask it in some water.

Maybe Sebastian was a good date candidate after all. Even if he didn’t get any text yet…

Chapter Text

Over the course of a few weeks, they exchanged texts and calls, often at weird times just to cheer the other up, and they went to the movies once.

This day though, there were barely any contact since Kurt was pulling an all-nighter at work, and Sebastian was nowhere to contact him. That is, until…

“Hey, Kurt? Someone is looking for you. Someone hot. Really hot.” Tina said a little too loud. A sleep ridden Kurt, doing some finishing touches, meekly told her to let him in.

“Shit, you look awful.” A familiar male voice greeted him afterwards, the smell of spices reeking from the plastic bags he put on Kurt’s table.

“Fuuuuuck. Smells good. I need food.” Kurt moaned and immediately scrambled for the food even before Sebastian could ask for somewhere to sit down. It actually took Kurt a full five minutes to realize his guest was standing around like a sore thumb. “Oh! Shit! Uhhh, you can take that spare chair,” he pointed a little frantically.

Kurt could hear Sebastian snicker as he grabbed the chair he was pointed at and sat down. “It’s fried rice. Another best food from your future rendezvous.” Sebastian said calmly as he took the other carton and ate his own food.

“How did you get in? It’s not lunch time yet.” Kurt mumbled in between scoops.

“Kurt, its fifteen past twelve. I’m pretty sure it’s lunch time anywhere in the city.” Sebastian gave him a glare. He checked his computer. Right…

“Sorry, I was just….” He motioned at his computer. “How do you know my work place anyway?”

“Isabelle Wright’s Vogue, as I like to call it, sits nicely just two floors below my firm.” Sebastian smiled. “Rings a bell?”

Kurt’s eyes went wide. “Myka and Michael? That’s one huge firm.”

Sebastian nodded. “Yes, it is. Myka is my sister. Michael’s my uncle. Put them together and apparently, they made a huge ass firm.” He took a huge spoonful of rice. “And right there,” he motioned to Isabelle, emerging from her room, “is a family friend. Aunt Belle!”

The older woman looked at their direction, and was as surprised to see Sebastian there. “Oh my god, Sebastian!” They had a long hug with big smiles on their faces.

“It’s been too long! What are you doing here?” Isabelle asked.

“I know, right? Silly to think that we work in the same building. I’m just courting that beautiful employee you have over there.” Sebastian pointed at Kurt who was face deep in fried rice.

Isabelle let out a loose laugh. “I see that you have tainted him with your obsession for Asian food.”

“It’s justifiable and I have made an essay on that, Aunt Belle.” Sebastian frowned. Isabelle laughed again and gave the taller man a kiss on the cheek.

“As great it is to see you again, I have a business lunch to go to. Enjoy your time with Kurt. I like him.” She nudged at Sebastian’s side and waved at Kurt. “See you!”

Sebastian plopped back at the chair next to Kurt and continued eating his food. “Man, I love her.”

“Who doesn’t?” Kurt snickered. The other man merely shrugged and joined having lunch again. “You seem to be really close to her.”

“Oh? Yeah,” Sebastian munched on his food, “ever since my mom passed away she’s kind of my own surrogate mother.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.” Kurt put down his food.

“Chill. She was sick and all that so I was expecting it. But without Aunt Belle I’m pretty sure I would’ve turned out worse.” Sebastian smiled, but his eyes were a little watery than before.

“What happened?”

“Cancer. In her brain or something. She was a really great professor in French literature, but one day she fell while in class and one of her students rushed her to the campus’ hospital. There was already a huge ass tumor in her head and it already spread. Blah blah blah, sick sick sick, then dead.” Sebastian shrugged. “I’d be glad if we don’t talk about this now. I just want to have lunch with someone that I’m interested in.”

“Sorry…” Kurt held his head down. “I mean, I know how you feel.”

“I know.” Sebastian pinched Kurt’s cheek. “I’ve heard the story. I could imagine it was worse for you, being still a little child and all. At least I had the chance to grow up with mine.”

Kurt scooted his chair closer to Sebastian and laid his head on his shoulder. “I guess we’re in the band of ‘fuck I miss my mom because she was sick’ now?”

“I like ‘fucked up kids who lost their moms by fucking cancer’ but that can work too.” Sebastian placed a kiss on Kurt’s hair.

“Hey! No messing with my hair!” Kurt pushed himself away and frowned. Sebastian only laughed as he took his food carton again and continued eating. Kurt smiled and followed suit, both men eating their lunch in comfortable silence with little teasing here and there.

Chapter Text

Kurt was ready to clock in for the day. Yesterday’s frantic effort to finish up before deadline comes was, well, frantic, and he was happy enough to go home albeit a little late than what he had hoped for. He was going down the stairs of the train station when a sudden buzz in his coat surprised him.

Incoming Call – Meerkat

“Hey? I thought you’re staying late.” They had a sleepover date at Kurt’s place, but Sebastian texted 10 bubbles of sorry when he realized he had to fix a messed up case file made by a previous associate that already moved. Kurt of course was upset, but he understood.

“Sebastian?” Kurt called again when no sound was coming from the other side. “Did you butt-dial me?”

“Hmmmmph, fuck, fuck, Kurt, fuck, hhhhhhh….” Kurt was met by loud grunting—not the kind you get when you were aroused, but the kind you get when you’re shivering and… fighting something?

“Sebastian!” Kurt yelled, already running upstairs back to his office building. “Are you okay? I’m going there!”

“Oh fuck shit Kurt is that you oh fuck oh fuck no no no don’t come you’ll hate me fuck off!” He could hear Sebastian’s disheveled voice, still shivering, still grunting.

“Too late, fuck,” Kurt inhaled a deep breath, “I’m already going to your floor. 17^th or 18^th?”

“Shit. 18^th.”

“Okay. Stay there.”

Kurt was tapping his feet the whole way up, pacing here and forth in the cramped elevator, wondering if he was too late and something bad was happening to Sebastian, and he couldn’t help him in time…

When the ding of the elevator came, Kurt bolted out of the small space and into the maze that was Sebastian’s firm. “Sebastian!” He called loudly.

“Kurt?” A reply, although not so loud, came from second to right door. “Is that you? Did you really come?”

Kurt ran to the room and found Sebastian curled beneath his table, papers thrown wildly on top of it, and drawers partly opened. Sebastian was looking for something, it looked like. Kurt knelt in front of the trembling man and offered his hand. “I’m here.”

Sebastian slowly peeked out his head from where he was hiding it between his knees, red eyes and tears showing, messy hair, trembling lips… Kurt couldn’t help but shed a tear. “K-Kurt.” Sebastian sobbed as he threw his weight at Kurt’s chest, scratching and squeezing and wheezing, generally, a mess.

“Sebastian, Sebastian. I’m here, I’m here.” Kurt wrapped his arms around the younger man, hugging him, patting his back. “I’m here. I’m going nowhere.”

“K-Kurt. Take me home. Take me home. I need—” Sebastian wheezed, but didn’t continue. Kurt was really itching to ask but he refrained and instead asked, “Where do you live? I’ve never been there before.”

Sebastian pushed himself away and looked at Kurt’s eyes. “What?”

“Yeah, you’ve never taken me there before.” Kurt said. “You always said you want to wait.”

Sebastian only looked at Kurt, then he wrapped himself in a curl again. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck shit I did wrong fuck fuck oh God help me fuck fuck fuck shit fuck this is wrong this is wrong fuck fuck fuck!” His hand tugged at his hair, strongly to the point some strand were pulled with it.

“Sebastian! Stop!” Kurt took the hands away and wrapped them on his chest. “Stop. It’s okay. Do you have your address written somewhere? I can always Google it and take you there.”

There were probably a dozen or so wheezes before Sebastian pulled his phone from his lap and unlocked it, then giving it to Kurt. “I don’t remember where b-but I’m pretty sure I wrote it somewhere.”

“Okay.” Kurt pulled—with all strength he had—Sebastian to his arms and rocked him back and forth as he looked around for his address. “Harlem?” He felt a nod on his chest. He copied the address to his own phone and googled the directions.

“Okay, found it. Come on, up. We’ll go home.” Kurt pulled Sebastian up from his hiding place. When the taller man came up, he looked around at his station.

“Oh fuck… This is not good… Fuck… This shouldn’t happen….” His hand ran around the thrown papers and opened drawers.

“It’s okay, I’ll help you with this tomorrow. Let’s just go. Do you have anything you want to take with you?” Kurt asked.

“M-my backpack.” Sebastian reached for the black bag hiding at the corner of his station, grunting as the weight of the bag hit his back.

“I can carry it for you if it’s too much.” Kurt tugged at the bag only to get Sebastian dismiss him off. “Okay.”

It was an hour drive, a very uncomfortable one as he kept checking the man next to him, whether he was getting worse or better. If anything, Sebastian was numbly sitting there, staring at the void, only turning around to see the lights and then went back to looking blankly at the dashboard.

“We’re here. Where do I park?” Kurt nudged the other guy.

“Huh? Oh.” Sebastian pointed at a hazy basement opening, pulling a white card from his pocket. “Swipe this thing at the swiping thingy. Floor 4, unit 87D.”

Kurt nodded and followed Sebastian’s words. He parked the car and helped Sebastian up, holding his… friend? Lover? The other man’s hand in his, squeezing every time they were rising up in the elevator. “Floor 4.”

87D was the easternmost unit, right at the end of the hallway, so it took more time than Kurt had wanted because Sebastian was practically dragging his body instead of walking properly. There gone the Sebastian he knew; this was a completely someone else, and yet still the same person that introduced Kurt to an unknown Asian food excitedly like a child in Christmas.

When they finally entered the unit, Sebastian all but bolted inside and messed up with the drawers in his kitchen. Kurt inhaled a deep breath as he locked the door and took his time taking his shoes and coat off. When he joined Sebastian in the kitchen, there were 3 pills in Sebastian’s hand and a bottle of water.

“What are those?” Kurt asked as Sebastian downed all three pills in one go and gulped the whole bottle at once. When Sebastian was done, he only looked at Kurt as he pointed at three yellow prescription bottles at the counter.

Antidepressants.

“Oh.” Kurt placed them back at the counter and stood next to Sebastian. “Were you looking for these three at work?” He could feel swoosh of wind as Sebastian nodded on top of him.

“I, uh.” Sebastian scratched the back of his head. “I usually keep two bottles of each, one in my place and one at work. I was—I was getting an episode and I realized the ones in my office was empty. So… well… that happened. I’m so sorry.”

Sebastian abruptly fell on his knees and sobbed against his palms. “I’m so, so, sorry, Kurt, I’m so sorry, I ruined your day, I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry….” It continues on and on, sometimes he would gag on his tears, but the apologizing wouldn’t stop.

“Sebastian, Sebastian. It’s alright.” Kurt wrapped his arms around Sebastian, but the wailing only got louder. “It’s okay. I don’t mind. I’m here for you. You have nothing to apologize for.”

“I’m sorry… I’m a mess… I shouldn’t drag you in this… No one should… Please go, it would be better for you…” Sebastian sobbed against Kurt’s chest, looking lost even when he’s at home.

“I’m staying.” Kurt kissed Sebastian’s hair. “I’m staying.” His fingers ran through Sebastian’s hair, trying to calm the other man. “I l—uh, I’m staying.”

It took some time, but finally Sebastian calmed down enough to take them to the living room. “This is why I don’t want you to see my place,” he said, motioned at the messy room. “I just… I gave up after several times messing up this place that I spent five hours meticulously cleaning, so I just left it… like this.”

Kurt squeezed Sebastian’s hand. “It’s alright.”

“I guess you’re going to ask me why this happened.” Sebastian looked down at where their hands were holding and intertwined their fingers.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Kurt leaned up to kiss his temple. “I’m here.”

“Nah, I don’t want to waste your time, so why the fuck not.” Sebastian took a deep breath. “Remember the story about my mom? Well, she died when I was serving in Iraq.”

“Serving?” Kurt sat up straight, his eyes confused.

“Umm,” Sebastian scratched his nape. “After I graduated high school, I went to Harvard Law. But I didn’t immediately become a lawyer afterwards. I joined the Air Force, became a part of the reserves, and when the war with ISIS and stuff happened, I was deployed. I was a part of them for, I think three, four years?” He shrugged. “Anyway, I was there, fighting those bastards. We were going to attack them from behind when my CO got the call from my father that mom was gone. I… I only had one chance to see her even when she was sick. It was a quick, ‘Hey mom, I’m here, but I can’t stay for long, I love you’ and several Skype calls, but at the end, I lost her even before I could tell her how much I loved her.

“I tried to shake it off my head, because I still have a fight to do for the remainder of my duty, but our attack failed. The opponent had been tipped off about our attack and were readier than any of us were. We lost a good bunch of people. I lost a few friends.” Sebastian sighed deeply. “It was too much for me to handle. I requested an early quit and spent a year moping around my house in Ohio, often spending time in my parents’ room, just inhaling everything that was my mom. I would be all over my father and my sister when they come around to the point they were sick of it and dragged my ass to New York and literally pushed me into a shrink.”

“They weren’t sick of you. They were worried.” Kurt said softly.

Sebastian scoffed. “Yeah, well, you’ll be sick of me too if you were in their place. I don’t blame them. Anyway the shrink prescribed me those three little shits and now I’m dependent on them to be Sebastian Smythe again. Yay!” He clapped.

“With or without the pills, you are still Sebastian Smythe, Sebastian.” Kurt put his head on Sebastian’s shoulder hesitantly, waiting for a nudge, but he got no such thing, so he snuggled against the bigger man. Sebastian didn’t seem to mind either, as he wrapped his arms around Kurt’s shoulder. They sat there, in each other’s arms, in silence. Sebastian were about to doze off when Kurt shook him. “Hey, you should move to your room. I bet your bed is better than my head.”

“Too far… too cold…,” Sebastian pouted, “it’s warm here with you….”

Kurt sighed but pulled Sebastian up. “I’ll be around for a while.”

“Until tomorrow morning?” Sebastian still had the pout in his lips although he was leading them to his room. “Please? We don’t have to do anything.”

Kurt looked at the disheveled man and relented. “Okay.” He reached up to kiss Sebastian’s cheek, “I’ll stay.”

“Thank you.” Sebastian caught him in a big hug, almost squeezing the life out of him.

“Okay, okay, c’mon. It’s late. We need rest.” Kurt giggled as he tapped Sebastian’s shoulder to let him go. He stripped down to his undershirt and boxers, folding his clothes neatly and put it on top of the bedside table and got comfortable on the bed. Sebastian only stood, watching him. “O-oh. I’m supposed to sleep outside? Okay, I, uh… Sorry.”

“Wait, wait, no! That’s not—I didn’t mean to stare. I was just… wow. You’re really beautiful.” Sebastian said, pulling Kurt’s hand and wrapping his arms around the smaller man.

“Oh.” Kurt mumbled.

“Oh.”

They both snickered and left each other’s arms; Kurt snuggling under the comforter again and Sebastian stripping down to his underwear.

“Goodnight, Sebastian.”

“Goodnight, Kurt. Thank you again.”

Chapter Text

Kurt woke as the sun glared between the shades of the bedroom. It took him a couple of blinks until he realized he wasn’t in his own place; a roll around gave him the sight of a sleeping Sebastian and he smiled.

He sat down on the bed and stretched his body, getting the sleepiness away, and relieved himself before going to the kitchen to rummage anything that he can make.

At the end he found some ingredients that would be perfect to be made into an English breakfast. It wasn’t necessarily the healthiest food, and he wasn’t exactly looking forward in messing up his diet, but he was too lazy to make a run for food outside in an area that he’s not used to.

The place’s resident woke up exactly as Kurt was frying some bacon. “That smells great. Please be my cook.”

“Nope.” Kurt put his tongue out and kept on cooking. He soon felt a pair of arms around his waist and a warm puff of air on his neck. “Okay, maybe I’ll reconsider.”

“Yay.” Sebastian whispered against Kurt’s neck, kissing him tentatively as his grip around his waist tightened. “Fuck, Kurt.”

“What?” Kurt raised an eyebrow as he flipped the bacon, cooking the other side. “I’m up if you want to make a mess.”

Kurt could feel the snicker on his neck. “No, no. It’s just…,” Sebastian burrowed his head on Kurt’s shoulder blades, “this feels nice.”

Kurt smiled and raised a hand to pat Sebastian’s cheeks. He wouldn’t lie; it did feel nice to have someone wrap his arms around him while being domestic. Even if that someone is Sebastian Smythe. Actually, especially when it’s Sebastian Smythe.

“Okay, breakfast is served.” Kurt nudged at the sleepy guy behind him as he carried two plates of their breakfast. “Where do you want to eat?”

“The couch. We can watch something while we eat. And cuddle.” Sebastian snatched one of the plates and half-jogged to the living room, stopping as Kurt heard a loud thump from the sofa. He snickered.

“You’re really useless in the morning, aren’t you?” Kurt teased as he got comfortable cradled in the other man’s arms.

“Only because I’ve got company. I would usually jog around the block and get some breakfast from a deli in Saturday mornings.” Sebastian mumbled between scoops of food as he switched between channels, finally deciding to stick with a Planet Earth rerun.

They finished their breakfast in silence, the sound of David Attenborough narrating a wildlife documentary and the sound of them munching on food the only things that filled the void.

“So, Seb.” Kurt cleared his throat as he put his empty plate with Sebastian’s on the coffee table. “What are we?”

A second after the question, Kurt cursed himself for asking such thing, because the other man abruptly stood up and cleaned up the dishes. He could hear the dishwasher—of course Sebastian has a dishwasher—running and for a split second it looked like Sebastian was not coming back. But he did.

“What answer do you want?” Sebastian muttered as he plopped on the couch next to Kurt, but not wrapping his arm around the other person as he did just mere minutes before.

Kurt sighed. “I… I don’t know. Boyfriends? Exclusive? You’re the only guy I’ve been seeing for nearly two months now, and I can’t put a word for you—for us.”

Sebastian sighed, too. “I don’t know. You’re too good for me to fuck up.” He buried his face in his hands.

“I’m… sorry.” Kurt said, softly. “It’s unfair to ask that after last night.”

“No, no.” Sebastian pinched the bridge of his nose and looked at Kurt’s eyes. “It’s unfair for me to make you wait this long.”

The smaller male merely cocked his head to his side, confused. His confusion was answered with a quick swoop of kiss, as Sebastian pinned him down on the couch.

“Fuck, I’ve wanted to do that for a long time.” Sebastian muttered as he pulled himself away, but only slightly, as he still hovered on top of Kurt.

“What? Pin me down on a cushion?” Kurt teased and got another kiss.

“That, too, but really, I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long.” Sebastian confessed. “It’s a surprise I held out this long,” he laughed nervously.

“Why did you?” Kurt asked, raising a hand to play with the other man’s hair. “Wait this long, I mean.”

“I don’t know.” Sebastian shrugged. “I just don’t want to fuck this up.”

“Well, you’re not. Not yet. We can fuck, though. There’s no complaints in that.” Kurt said as he pulled Sebastian down for another kiss.

***

Kurt woke up to Sebastian’s head on his chest. As he played with Sebastian’s hair, he checked his phone. “It’s two pm already.”

“Mmhmm.” Sebastian mumbled, but quickly rose up. “You need to go, don’t you?” Kurt could hear the disappointment in his voice.

“Rachel and some other girls are coming over for a sleepover this evening.” Kurt sighed.

“Okay.” Sebastian sat up at the edge of the bed. “We can, we can see each other next time.”

“Hey.” Kurt wrapped his arms around Sebastian’s waist, trying to snuggle his way around the other man’s arms. “I’m always here.”

“You don’t have to.” Sebastian sighed.

“Sebastian.” Kurt’s voice sounded stern. “What’s wrong?”

The green-eyed man looked straight at Kurt’s eyes before burrowing his head in his hands again. “It’s just, I don’t know. I’m scared that I’ll open my eyes and you’re gone. That this is just a dream. You’re just too good for me.”

Kurt smiled meekly and wrapped his arms tighter before pulling away. “I’m still here and I’m not planning to go anywhere. I am, though, in need of a shower, and I see a really good one next door.”

Sebastian looked at Kurt. “Can I join?”

“Catch me first.”

Chapter Text

A big bouquet of flowers suddenly came to view as Kurt opened his door early Sunday morning. The girls were fast asleep in his bedroom and he wasn’t expecting anyone, so it clearly was a surprise to hear the bells ringing this early.

“Seb?” Kurt called as he took the flowers. True enough, behind was Sebastian Smythe dressed to the nines while also looking like a lost child.

“Your question kept me awake last night.” Sebastian said quickly. “And I realized it’s unfair for both of us if we’re still in this weird relationship limbo where we’re both each other’s and not.” He finally got the courage to look up to Kurt’s eyes. “And damn if I didn’t want to strangle that coworker of yours that never stopped trying to get in your pants even in my presence.” A sigh, “So that I get the right to punch him in the face, and other guys in the future that tries to get in your pants, let’s be exclusive.”

Kurt smiled at the sweet advances. “Is this the real, actual, living, Sebastian Smythe, asking me to be his boyfriend in a Sunday morning, not forgetting to dress impeccably?

Of course he had to tease.

“Okay, I’m heading out. This was a mistake.” Sebastian immediately turned around to the general direction of the stairs, but Kurt pulled his arm so to stop him from going. “This is the only time I’ll ask, Hummel.”

“I know, I know.” Kurt stifled a laugh. “It’s just too perfect to be true. But yeah, let’s be exclusive.” He stood on his tiptoes and gave the other man a quick peck.

“Nice.” Sebastian smiled to the kiss as he pressed for more, but the shriek of a female behind Kurt’s back stopped them to go further.

“For fuck’s sake Berry, shut up for once.” Sebastian gave a shocked Rachel a death glare while still holding Kurt.

“What the hell is going on?” Rachel raised a hand to cover her mouth dramatically. Sebastian rolled his eyes as Kurt turned around to face his friend.

“I’m just kissing my boyfriend here.” Kurt nudged Sebastian’s side, who was currently flustered, and twirled the bouquet still in his hand.

“How come you never tell me about this?” Rachel shrieked again.

“I did. Last night.” Kurt deadpanned.

“I’ll let you guys sort this out on your own…,” Sebastian took little steps backwards, “Kurt, I’ll take you out for lunch?”

“Yeah, okay.” Kurt reached up to give Sebastian a kiss on his cheek before reentering his apartment, consoling his shrieking friend while bubbling of joy for the newfound relationship status between himself and the man he’s been pinning for months.

That visit to the club was never planned to go this way, but Kurt didn’t mind. He minded Rachel’s nonstop nagging, though.