Chapter Text
Rhodey stares at Strange the entire time he is here. Tony finds it hilarious. Of course he knows why he's staring. He knows exactly what he's wondering. He keeps catching Tony's eye and silently asking if they are actually related or not. It's a fair question, if you know who Tony's other brothers are. Or one in particular, as the case may be.
Still, what fun would it be if Tony answers him outright? So he keeps smirking at him instead. Let Rhodey bear take from that what he will.
JARVIS announces the pizza has arrived and Rhodey jumps out of his chair to go get it. Obviously he has taken the smirk for a confirmation and decided to escape while he can. Just as long as he comes back with the pizza, Tony is fine with that.
“Why do all of your friends keep staring at me?” Strange asks.
Tony shrugs innocently. “Who knows how their minds work. I have strange friends after all,” he smirks, pleased with himself.
“Hilarious,” Strange drawls, “What's the real reason?”
“You mean you don't believe me? Why ever not?” He gives him his best puppy eyes.
Strange snorts. “Besides all the warnings I have received before I started working with you?”
“Rude. People are so rude,” he complains.
“How about the fact you look more like a toddler then a puppy when you use that look? And anyone knows to be wary when a toddler uses that look on you.”
“See? Rude. Everyone is so very rude to me. Why is no one nice to me anymore? Doesn't anyone love me?” he asks.
“Just because we love you doesn't mean we don't know what you're like,” Pepper says as she walks in with Rhodey, both carrying pizza boxes.
“Food!” Tony cheers and goes to grab a box for himself.
The others roll of their eyes and give each other knowing looks. He ignores them in favor of his food. He'll talk to his friends again when his friends stop being so mean to him. What has he ever done to deserve this? Then again, he probably doesn't want an answer to that.
“I see what you mean,” Pep comments, looking Strange over.
“Oh for the love of-” Strange throws his hands in the air, “Will someone please tell me why you assholes keep looking at me like that? Is it the cape? Something on my face? What?”
“Levi is awesome,” Tony says between bites, “They're just jealous of your awesome facial hair. We're the Awesome Facial Hair Bros remember?”
“I hate you,” Strange grumbles.
Tony takes another large bite of pizza in answer.
“Is that bros in the literal sense or in Tony talk?” Rhodey ask cautiously.
“Literally?” Strange scoffs, “You think I'm related to this idiot?”
“Love you too pumpkin,” Tony says obnoxiously.
“It's Stark speak for he's jealous I pull it off better,” he smirks.
“Lies,” Tony denies, “It's all lies and slander. I have the trademark on the look. You're just lucky I don't sue you for copyright. But I won't because I'm nice like that. Unlike some people,” he says pointedly.
“So definitely not related,” Rhodey asks, just to make sure.
“No,” Strange says firmly, “Should I be worried?”
“Depends. You clearly haven't met the other one yet,” Rhodey teases.
Strange frowns deeply, looking rather concerned at this news. “Other one? What other one?”
“Both of them actually,” Pepper adds, “Although one is much more enjoyable than the other.”
“True,” Rhodey agrees.
“You better not be talking about who I think you're talking about,” Tony glares at them. Because if they are, his friends aren't just rude, they have no taste as well.
“I wish you people would make sense,” Strange complains, “Do you mean there's more than one Stark running around?”
“Don't be ridiculous,” Tony tells him. After all, there can only be one true Stark in the world. And the other two have a different last name anyways, so technically speaking, there is.
“But feel blessed for not knowing,” Rhodey adds, “You really don't want to meet the other one.”
“If you think one is bad, two is worse,” Pepper continues.
“And adding the third is enough to cause explosions,” Rhodey smirks.
“Hey!” Tony protests.
“What other one ?” Strange asks exasperated.
“You know, the other one ,” Rhodey teases.
“I hate you all,” Strange informs them, taking a bite of his own slice of pizza.
Tony nods. “I told you people are rude.”
“Shut up Stark.”
Chapter 2
Notes:
This.. didn't go at all like I was planning. What is this? How did this even happen? Might be a mess, but here it is.
Chapter Text
“You know that you can't actually kill someone by glaring at them right?” Tony says casually as he continues typing on his phone, not bothering to look up.
“I am Sorcerer Supreme. Watch me.” Strange sounds rather aggravated right now.
A quick side glance tells Tony that yes, his expression matches his tone perfectly. Tony, being who he is, snickers instead of doing anything helpful. He's not really worried about the threat. It's not as if he hasn't courted a surer death than this before. And if he actually succeeds? Well he has a line of people who are willing to avenge him.
But then he sighs, not really in the best of moods himself after everything that has happened lately. “Look I'm sorry I had to keep canceling on you these last few weeks, but I told you, it was a family emergency. As much as I love you Potter, family comes first.”
Strange's glare does not lessen. Or at least that's what it feels like. Tony doesn't actually look up to check. Still it feels like a safe bet. “I'm not stupid you know.”
“Of course not,” Tony murmurs reassuringly and then snorts at the reply he just got.
“I know that you three made up some imaginary brothers to make fun of me.”
“What?” Tony blinks, looking up at that, “Made up my...” he snorts a laugh, unable to help himself, “Strange, honey, I know you think that I have nothing better to do with my time than snark at you-”
“Because that's all you do when we get together,” he interrupts.
“ Oh as if you are any better,” Tony rolls his eyes at that, “But really, there are so many better jokes that I could have come up with than making up my brothers . Like how about everything ?” He shakes his head.
“Then why have I never heard of them before then?” he challenges, “I know Howard Stark only had one child – you.”
“Correct,” Tony turns his attention back to his phone, “I'm the only child Howard had – that we know of that is. Who knows if there are any other women he knocked up that never spoke up. Or dumped the kid his his lap and left essentially.” He shrugs his shoulders as if it no big deal. Neither his biological Mother or Father were especially thrilled to have him around. So what? He has his brothers.
Strange blinks as if he was expecting an argument. “Half brothers then? How very convenient of you.”
“And now you're just reaching,” Tony huffs, “Just because I don't have a family portrait in front on my fireplace doesn't mean that they don't exist. Pick a new topic because this one is getting old.”
“You don't have a fireplace,” he says, and then, “What? Scared to be proven wrong?”
“No, tired of you sounding like an ass.” Of all the things he has been accused of in life this is certainly something new. Something unspeakably stupid of course, but something new. But now it's old so he's done.
“Tell me,” Strange's smirk is audible in his voice, “how can you stand to hear yourself speak then?”
“Ha, ha, you're hilarious,” Tony deadpans, “Don't quit your day job.” He sends three texts in rapid fire succession and waits.
Strange lets out an aggravated sigh. “Are we going to actually work today or are you going to be on your phone the entire time. Who are you even texting?”
“My imaginary brother's husband.”
There is a pause and then another sigh. “Really Stark?”
“Not my fault you don't believe me,” Tony shrugs, “and I can multitask thank you very much. It's not as if we're going to do brain surgery or muck about with alternate universes. I can handle two things are once.”
“Has anyone told you recently what a joy you are to work with?”
“Right back at you sweet cakes.”
“What are you two arguing about now?” Rhodey asks as he walks in, sitting next to Tony on the couch.
Tony immediately leans against him. “Hi platypus, welcome to the party. Oh you know, just the usual – how annoying I am, how bitchy he is, how we made up my brothers to because apparently we're in middle school again.”
“What?” Rhodey pauses and then laughs, “Oh my god Strange, he's right. That is so middle school. Why would you even think that?”
“Middle school? I do believe you two overestimate your maturity level.”
“Hey, what have I told you about being rude?” Tony asks, insulted, “Rhodey is fifteen at least.” Tony knows better than to argue what his mental age might be.
“Thanks for the support Tones,” Rhodey says dryly.
“No problems sugar plum.” He's distracted by the reply John sent.
“Everything okay?” Rhodey asks.
“Yeah,” Tony nods, “it was touch and go for a while, but everything's fine now.”
Rhodey throws an arm around Tony's shoulders and pulls him closer still. “That's great news. I know between the two of you being shot usually isn't a cause for concern, but this time it was serious.”
“Shot?” Strange asks, no longer sounding as if he wants to continue his argument, “Where was he shot? What does he do that this isn't the first time?”
“Detective,” Tony says, leaving out the consulting part. Really that would be too big of a hint. He is still having too much fun with this, even if he was worried, “And in the chest. He flatlined twice on the table before they were able to stabilize him.”
Strange clears his throat awkwardly. “I am glad he is recovering then.”
“Thanks,” Tony flashes him a smile.
“And Stark,” he adds, “if you really are making him up after this, I am going to kill you.”
Tony laughs.
Chapter 3
Notes:
Much happier with this one. Cause you know, this is what I was going for in the first place. (Still a little iffy, but eh, whatever. It's done.)
Chapter Text
“And then of course the git has to say 'prove it' as if we aren't about to be in the middle of a shoot out.”
“Really John,” Sherlock groans, “why do you have to make it sound so dramatic? I was merely trying to point out-”
“No, you were merely trying to get the both of killed. Again.” John glares at him.
Sherlock waves him off. “Oh please, as if any of them could have hit the broad side of a barn.”
“We were surrounded!”
“Did you see the way they were holding their guns? We would have been fine. Shouldn't a former soldier know this?”
“That is beside the point and you know it. You can't keep mouthing off to people with guns. Or have you already forgotten your last encounter?”
Tony, Rhodey and Pepper are watching with varying degrees of amusement and sympathy. Tony can tell that his two friends are leaning more heavily toward the latter, relating to John more than Sherlock. He can practically see the wheels turning in their heads, comparing the two of them. Rude.
Tony on the other hand just wants to eat popcorn while he watches because this is some high class entertainment here. He is also the first one to notice the portal forming in his living room, but not by much. Soon it has the room's attention. Tony grins. Oh this is going to be good.
Strange steps out of the portal. “Stark I-” but then he stops when he notices the others, “Pardon me, I didn't realize...” he trails off when he registers who is exactly in the room.
Tony cackles. He falls against Pepper's shoulder and hugs his stomach in pure and utter joy at Strange's expression.
Rhodey and Pepper handle it slightly better, not laughing, but he can tell they want to. They are going to be so happy they got to see this.
“Stark,” Strange growls.
“Y-yes honey bunches?” he manages in between laughs, “can – can I he-help you?” he howls at Strange's continue glare.
John looks at Strange, looks at Sherlock and then rolls his eyes at Tony. “John Watson,” he introduces, “and my husband Sherlock Holmes. Nice to meet you-?”
“Doctor Stephen Strange, Sorcerer Supreme.”
Sherlock takes one look at him and announces, “John is an army doctor, much better than a magical neurosurgeon.”
John just sighs, resigned to it all by now.
That doesn't help Tony calm down at all. Quite the opposite in fact.
“I'm sorry what?” Strange sputters.
“Hey Potter, nice of you to call,” Tony says grinning widely, but able to control his laughter now, “Meet my imaginary brother and imaginary brother-in-law. Quite the set huh?”
“Imaginary?” John frowns.
“Are you sure you two aren't related?” Rhodey asks with his own grin.
“I am certain that I have no biological twin,” Strange assures them, still eyeing Sherlock cautiously.
“They say every person in the world has a twin,” Pepper says as if trying to be helpful. Here's a hint: she actually isn't.
“It's like Ross all over again,” John mutters to himself.
Sherlock makes an inquiring noise in the back of his throat. “Army?”
“Army,” John confirms, “it was an interesting two weeks, believe me.”
“Didn't you almost get kidnapped because the two of you looked so much alike?” Rhodey asks.
Now John turns his glare onto him.
“Yeah,” Rhodey nods unphased, “I know who you're talking about. Man was Air Force before he got pulled into another section.”
Which is code for some kind of black ops. How very mysterious. “Wait, why haven't I heard this story before?” Tony pouts, “The two of you are holding out on me. I demand details. Now.”
“Wait is this the brother that has just been shot?”
“It was only a flesh wound,” Sherlock protests.
“Of all the times to decide that you are going to remember a pop culture reference, it had to be that one,” John sighs.
Sherlock grins. “I was high on painkillers and you let me watch it. You have no one to blame but yourself.”
“I didn't think you'd actually keep it in that mind palace of yours. Hell, I didn't think you'd remember it at all. You were higher than a bloody kite.”
“Thus my enjoyment of the drivel,” Sherlock says with a smirk.
“If it's drivel why haven't you deleted it yet?”
“And miss out on your reaction? Come now John you know me better than that.”
“Mind palace? Delete? What on Earth are you talking about?” Strange frowns at them.
“Trust me,” Rhodey says, “you're better off not asking. But really man, are you sure you aren't related?”
“I hate you,” he glares at Tony as if it is his fault.
“Love you too Lucky Charms,” Tony flutters his eyes at him.
“Something in your eyes?”
“Only your beautiful, shining face.”
“So much hate,” Strange mutters.
“Rude. So very rude. Isn't he Lock?”
“Couldn't agree more Ant,” Sherlock nods.
Strange groans.
“At least the third one isn't here,” Pepper says.
There is both horror and annoyance on his face at the mere thought of it. “It's too early for this. I'm going back to the Sanctum.” Strange opens a portal and does just that.
Tony starts cackling again.
