Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

~Dedicated to my Mommy & my best friend, Marlene Dawn Immelman (20/11/47 to 07/05/23) You taught me to love reading and to adore romance! I, quite literally, wrote these stories for you. I miss you every day. Always & Forever~

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The pain in her eyes tore at his heart, but it made the gaping wound already there throb with satisfaction because she was was feeling his pain, his loss.

Finally she would know just how much it hurt.

Ian leaned in closer to the vapid, unsuspecting blond he was speaking to and relished the jealousy reflected in Roz's gaze.

Ian wanted her back.

Nothing else mattered.

Since the day she had ended their two and half year relationship, a month before, he had been dying inside, a little more every day.

He loved her.

More than he could bear and certainly more than he could show.

She held a fascination for him which had never lessened with intimate knowledge. In fact it had only increased the longer they'd been together.

Her voice, her touch, the weight of her gaze on him - it was everything.

She was in every memory he had, his childhood was littered with images of Roz and he had hoped that it would be the same in the future.

Roz was his life.

Ian felt no shame in wanting her as he did.

Their relationship had been real to him and yet she had dismissed it easily, as though it had been a game they'd been playing, and all because Tom couldn't keep his fucking dick in his pants.

Ian wanted to kill Tom for that.

He had cheated on Lil, Ian's own mother.

But what the fuck did Tom's indiscretion have to do with him?

Roz had ruined everything in her bid to set him free.

Ian didn't want to be free, he only wanted to be with her.

He left the boring, faceless girl and went towards the beautiful woman he wanted more than life itself.

Regal, statuesque and so fucking gorgeous, she stared back at him, an intimate all seeing gaze which revealed far more than she'd like.

He wanted to run his fingers through her short hair and feel her breath on his face. He wanted to feel her gasp of pleasure as he cut off her air with his tongue. He wanted her body pressed against his.

Fuck society's rules, fuck propriety, fuck anyone but them.

He knew her so well, just as she knew him.

They were entertwined together, endlessly looping each other into eternity.

Every glance spoke volumes.

She had tried to severe the bond they shared, but to no avail, for it wasn't something you could destroy by denying its existence.

He picked up his beer from the table beside her and took a long swallow.

"Where's Mum?" He asked, his voice deceptively casual and aloof.

Roz shifted slightly, her eyes dropping away from his for a moment.

"She went home."

She felt bad for her best friend, feeling her loss as if it were her own, despite her own sons happiness with Mary. She knew that Lil loved Tom, just as she loved Ian.

"Retired hurt." He said sarcastically, his tone venomous.

Roz lifted her eyes to his again,

"If you like."

"I don't like." Ian hissed, his eyes filled with rage and burning need.

He sat down on the chair opposite her, his gaze holding her captive.

"Why did you want to ruin everything?"

Tears filled Roz's eyes, "I didn't want to."

Ian's handsome face twisted in bitter agony for a moment before he hid it behind a mask of indifference.

The faceless blond smiled at him from across the room, her wide eyes filled with admiration and invitation.

The need to force Roz to react sent Ian to his feet, his gaze returned to Roz for a moment, a challenge there, one she couldn't take.

You want me to move on and live my life?

Watch me, his eyes told her and she felt her heart break into a thousand pieces.

Ian sauntered towards the eager girl, his lazy surfer boy grace intensely attractive.

Roz watched helplessly as he leaned in and whispered something into the girls ear.

It was an invitation.

One which the nameless girl accepted eagerly, with a smile thrown at her friend who giggled in response.

Ian didn't look back.

He was set on revenge.

Roz wanted him gone.

Now she would experience firsthand what it was like to get her wish.
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Ian found Hannah nice enough, but she lacked everything he craved.

She was too nice, too young and too eager.

She wasn't poised or knowledgeable, nor was her body lithe enough.

She wasn't Roz.

He went through the motions, blanking off his mind as he kissed her in the back seat of his car.

His first instinct had been to take her to the beach, but every part of him had rebelled at the very thought of this stranger there where only Roz belonged.

The beach was their sanctuary, his and Rozs'.

Hannah was loving and happy at this morose and handsome boys attention, she noticed nothing amiss because she didn't know the real him.

She didn't know how happy he could be in the right company, or how his smile lit up his entire face when he was with the woman he loved.

The brooding stranger was enough for her, he was all she knew.
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Ian left Hannah soon afterwards. He called a halt to their making out and pushed her away as gently as he could manage.

Afterwards he dropping her off at home without much explanation.

He was drawn despite himself, to the house above the beach. It was like a homing becon.

He knew that Roz would be home now from the wedding.

He felt remorseful and unclean after his encounter with the girl; like he had cheated on Roz.

He climbed the familiar stone steps towards her bedroom, the sea crashing wildly behind him, heralding the coming storm within and without. The clouds overhead raced with the wind, revealing the moon intermittently, in an eerie display of celestial light and brooding darkness. 

He hesitated for a brief moment before he knocked softly on the door before trying the handle.

It was locked.

Fuck.

"Roz."

He tried the door handle again.

"Roz, you there?"

Silence greeted his calls.

"Let me in." Ian pleaded, somehow knowing that she was there.

Inside the darkness of the bedroom, Roz sat up on the bed, her heart pounding wildly.

Ian was there, he had come for her.

She couldn't let him in, she had never been able to deny him anything when he was determined.

Tears fell unheeded down her cheeks as she heard the boy she loved tug on the flimsy door which was all that separated them from all they wanted and needed.

Roz was torn apart with guilt; for allowing their affair to begin at all, for wanting Ian so badly it hurt to be apart from him and most of all for setting him free when that was the one thing he didn't want.

She was trying to let go of him, sacrificing him to show her solidarity with Lil, but it was killing her inside.

Watching Ian leave with that girl had laserated what little was left of her heart.

She knew that she had pushed him away and that his act of revenge had been justified, but still it hurt more than she could ever remember anything hurting in her entire life.

So she had come home and lain sleepless on her bed, trying in vain not to imagine Ian having sex with that random girl.

The rattling stopped for a moment and Roz leapt off the bed about to open the door and run after him.

Don't leave, her heart pleaded silently. Don't give up on me.

The intermittent moonlight outlined his figure on the other side of the curtain which hung on the door.

His hands were in his hair, tugging on it, tormented.

Roz bit back a cry as he tried to open the door again, rattling it with such violence that Roz feared it would shatter.

"Roz! Let me in!" Ian shouted, past caring who heard him.

And then, a soft, broken whisper; "Please, Roz, I need you."

She could hear that he was on the point of a breakdown.

Slowly she reached for the key, her fingers trembled as they touched the cold steel.

If she opened the door everything would change.

But she couldn't leave the boy she loved outside like this.

She would just have to firm with him and tell him that they were over.

Lifting her chin resolutely, she turned the key and pushed the door open.

Ian turned swiftly at the sound of the door opening, his face at once disbelieving and tormented.

Roz didn't say a word, she stood there bare foot, in the rumpled dress she'd worn for the wedding, her face streaked with tears, blatantly showing him just how much pain she was in.

He was magnificent as always, white shirt pulled apart at the neck, tanned skin on display, dark blond hair a mess from careless fingers.

Ian didn't speak, simply moving closer until he was so close she could have touched him.

She moved aside to let him in, her senses going wild at the sight of him in her bedroom.

The same place they had spent so many days and nights naked and entertwined on the bed, against the wall and even on the floor.

No space had gone unchristened, with their pleasure in each other so intense and gratifying.

She shouldn't have let him in, she knew that and yet how could she leave him outside?

"I think you should go." she said at last, staying beside the still open door. "This is a mistake."

Ian turned to face her.

"Don't say that. Nothing between us has ever been a mistake. Don't shut me out, Roz, I need to speak to you. We need to fix this."

"You've just been with her...that girl...it's over Ian, we're over, and it's as it should be, because we should never have allowed this to start."

Ian paced away from her towards the wide window overlooking the sea below, he had no intention of leaving now that she'd let him in.

Roz admitted defeat.

She closed the door and stepped away from it, her hands clasped tightly together to stop them trembling.

"I love you." He said quietly and there was no doubting his sincerity. "I'm sorry about Hannah, I wasn't really interested in her..nothing happened...it was only to..."

"...Hurt me." Roz finished for him. "I know."

Ian came towards her slowly, his hands at his sides.

When he reached her, he touched her face.

He wiped at her tears, his large hands dancing along her jaw and lips, as if she were infinitely precious.

He cupped her face and lifted it to his own with a self assurance which hadn't been there in the beginning of their relationship. It was forceful. It made her heart pound.

Roz tried to pull away, but just like history repeating it's self, Ian wouldn’t allow her to withdraw.

"Don't." She said, firmly, her hands coming to rest on his forearms.

She meant to push him away but instead she found herself pulling him closer.

Ian leaned in and kissed her, his lips passionately clinging to hers, their breathing all at once harsh and broken.

Roz was lost.

At the first touch of his mouth on hers, her resolve crumbled.

Ian slid his tongue into her mouth, parting her lips expertly, hungrily igniting the ever present fire between them.

Roz tried to recall why she didn't want Ian to touch her, but she forgot it all as his tongue slid along hers.

Nothing mattered except them.

Ian wanted to consume her.

The insatiable hunger deep inside his gut driving him on as he held Roz impossibly closer.

He held her immobile as he plundered her mouth. He explored secret places, tasting very part of her.

He walked her backwards towards the massive bed against the far wall.

Ian gave Roz no time to think, he only wanted her to feel.

He wanted her to remember how good they were together, how they fitted together just like corresponding pieces in a puzzle.

Here they were perfect, behind closed doors, away from prying eyes and society's rules.

Their gazes locked as Ian pushed Roz down onto the wide expanse of her bed, speaking without words as he reached for her dress and lifted it over her head.

Roz watched him closely, her gaze memorising every muscle and sinew as he stripped off his white shirt revealing the perfection beneath.

Then he lowered his body over hers.

They were skin on skin, the spark ignited and they were lost in the deluge.

Ian kissed her deeply, worshipping her mouth like a starving man. He tasted each hidden part of her, savouring the taste of her on his tongue.

Their gazes clung to one another and they moved together, restlessly shifting together looking for the bone deep connection and delicious friction they had always shared.

Ian kicked off his trousers and settled between Roz's spread thighs with a groan of contentment.

This was home and it felt so fucking incredible to be back where he belonged.

Ian flexed his hips against her heat, causing her to whimper with need.

The scrap of fabric separating them, was torn away by Ian's eager, impatient hands.

She was slick, heated flesh, needing and wanting him to claim her just as he always had.

Together they were perfect, infallible, whole.

Nothing else mattered at that moment except them.

They'd have to work out the question of what would happen now that they were back together again.

Because Ian had no intention of letting Roz go now that she was back in his arms, where she belonged.
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Chapter Text

Roz hated family gatherings as much as she loved them.

Even after all these years it was hard to see Ian.

He was still with Hannah and they had a daughter. Things had moved along nicely, except Ian had never asked Hannah to marry him.

He was strangely aloof from his own family and Roz ached with the knowledge that maybe she had broken him permanently.

Ian had been happy with her, he'd loved his job and her.

Their relationship had been full; loving, sensual and exciting.

Roz now knew that being worried about holding him back and Ian losing interest in her as she aged had all been all wrong.

Ian would have been very happy with her, come what may.

As long as they were together, he'd asked for nothing else.

Both boys were coming to spend the long weekend with them, bringing their women and children along too.

Roz braced herself to hide all the emotions Ian made her feel, she would shield her gaze and act like the perfect grandmother.

It would never do for Hannah to notice just how much the air crackled with electricity every time Ian and Roz were in the same room.

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They were on the beach, it was late afternoon and the day had been filled with sunshine and sea water.

The girls were swimming, Lil and Tom frolicked in the surf with the children.

Roz sat on top of a sand dune watching her family from behind her sunglasses, desperately trying to ignore the fact that Ian sat beside her, not two feet away.

Her gaze was drawn to him, again and again.

Thankfully, she could hide that fact behind her sunglasses.

The years had only added to his allure, he had not changed much at all. Except there was a new maturity in him.

He was all man.

His body was hard, muscular, lithe - a surfers body.

His dark blond hair slightly too long and as messy as always.

His handsome face was slightly sullen as it usually was these days.

Roz could remember all too clearly how it felt to touch his hair, its messy length between her fingers.

Memories flashed through her mind without warning.

His hard body between her thighs, his substantial length inside her, stretching her deliciously, his mouth on hers devouring every blissful sound she made, his tongue buried inside her mouth, almost as deeply as his cock inside her...

At that thought, liquid heat flooded her body, the runoff pooling between her legs.

She was instantly aroused and mortified.

Why couldn't she forget him?

Ian took a swig of his beer, the bottle dangling loosely between his fingers, his gaze fixed on her.

"Take off your glasses." Ian said abruptly, breaking the silence. "I don't like you hiding your eyes from me."

Roz froze, like a deer cornered by headlights, her heartbeat wild, her mouth dessert dry.

She didn't want him to see her eyes, they'd always revealed too much about how she felt.

Ian knew her too well, even after all these years.

She'd carefully hidden behind her sunglasses for the entire day, how like Ian to challenge her about her crutch.

Without waiting for permission, Ian reached over and lifted the glasses off her face.

Roz stared at him, their eyes meeting in an intense, silent conversation. The warm beach air came alive with electricity.

It was impossible to breathe.

Just for a moment, Roz let her guard down.

She smiled at the boy she loved.

She allowing all the soul destroying yearning she felt so keenly to show itself in her eyes, before she slid the glasses back onto her face and turned away from Ian's knowing gaze.

He didn't say a word, he didn't have to.

Because in that moment, everything he'd long suspected had been confirmed.

Nothing had changed.

Roz still wanted him, just as he wanted her.

Always.

They were perfectly in tune in that shared moment, invincible.

Ian took another long sip of his beer, at peace for once, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

It had been a long time since he'd smiled like this.

Roz was still his.

Just as he still belonged to her.

Nothing could change that.

No one ever could.

Chapter Text

Roz was fuming with Harold.

He had applied for a job in Sydney without so much as a by-your-leave.

Who did such a thing without at least consulting their family?

She didn’t want to leave their home -this place was all that was good in her life, all she loved was here.
The ocean had always been her favourite place. Tranquil or rough, it soothed her soul, calmed the insanity and made her feel whole.

After Harold left for Sydney, Roz donned a swimsuit and practically ran towards the beach.

Lil was still at work and she wasn’t sure where the boys were.
She loved the rush of bubbly turquoise water as it swirled around her legs just before she dived into the surf, eager for oblivion.

The weight of Harold’s revelation was lifted as she swam through the warm water towards the floating dock they all loved to use.

Roz pulled herself up the short ladder with the ease of familiarity and froze.

Ian was there.

Alone.

“Oh! I didn’t know you were out here.” She exclaimed, pushing the water off her face and hair. “Do you mind if I join you?”

Ian regarded her with a minuscule smirk, squinting up at her against the glare of the sun through his thick, unruly blond hair.

“No, of course not.”

Roz sat beside him gingerly, eyeing his cigarette.

“Mind if I have a drag?”

Ian smiled at her request, slightly puzzled, although he handed her the cigarette.

“You can have a whole one, if you promise to behave yourself.” He teased.

Roz took it from his fingers, her own were wet and slightly sticky from the salt water.

“A drag will do.” She assured him, inhaling a lungful of smoke - her first in twenty years.

Ian watched her closely, his intense gaze making her heart beat faster.

“I didn’t know you smoked.”

Roz grinned at him, taking another puff before handing it back to him.

“I don’t, I gave up years ago.”

Ian watched her mouth move as she spoke with an intensity which made it impossible to breathe 

“Now I feel really sinful.” She said grinning widely.

Ian looked amused by her flippant comment.

“Nothing wrong with that.” He assured her, his gaze unreadable and intent.

Roz rolled over onto her belly, trying to stop the delicious flip-flop which was caused by looking into Ian’s electric gaze.

This boy did strange things to her, he had for some time now.

She found herself having to think of Ian as Lil's son constantly, lately, just to remind herself that he was off limits to her.

It was shameful and just plain wrong how attractive she found her best friends teenage son.

Ian was no ordinary teenager, not that this excused her growing obsession with him.

His personality bordered on tempestuous, he was passionate and often sullen, mature well beyond his years.

Roz had known him his entire life, but somehow all of the morality in the world couldn’t stop the drowning sensation she felt each time her eyes met his.

Ian watched her getting comfortable on the hard wood decking, admiring her lithe, beautifully toned body.

“How are you?” he asked quite out of the blue, like he truly wanted to know.

Harold never asked her things like that, he just wasn’t interested.

Roz's eyes flickered towards Ian’s briefly, as long as she dared.

“Fine.” She replied, laying her head down.

She truly didn’t know what else to say when her belly was a chaotic mess of butterflies.

Ian lay back too, his body right along side hers.

The distance between them was so small, mere inches.

God, he was beautiful.

Roz allowed herself to visually feast on his golden, surfer boy charms while his eyes where closed against the glare of the afternoon sun.

Suddenly his eyes opened. He turned towards her, their eyes met and Roz stopped breathing entirely.

He had caught her staring.

She was deeply embarrassed, but she couldn’t look away.

Her mouth was dessert dry as she stared at the boy she wanted with an ever growing ache.

She would have to be strong and resist temptation.

She was after all a married woman and Ian was her best friends son. 

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Later that day Roz, Ian, Lil and Tom sat on the veranda of Roz's house drinking wine and talking the way they usually did.

With Harold gone, things were more relaxed, they all felt it.

Roz sat beside Ian, while Tom and Lil shared the other side of the table.

“You might want to say yes, Saul is a well set up bloke.” Roz said to Lil - they were discussing her ardent beau, the stalker Saul.

“It doesn’t mean I have to go out with him!” Lil laughed.

"Ahhh, can't he take a hint?" Ian groaned, laughing while raking a sip of his beer.

"Evidently not." Roz replied sarcastically.

“I have a suggestion,” Ian told his mother, “Tell him to go fuck himself.”

They all burst out laughing.

“What if he doesn’t know how?” Lil joked, her gaze sliding over to Tom as the music changed.

Tom was watching her intently, his dark eyes filled with something she couldn’t quite name.

It made her feel alive in a way she hadn’t felt before in her entire life.

“I love this song!” she said getting up to go and dance.

Accepting Lil's silent invitation, Tom followed her into the living room.

Lil was full of girlish high spirits that afternoon. She and Tom messed around as they danced, flirting casually as they usually did on days such as this, when wine lowered their inhibitions.

It was all harmless fun and Lil knew it would have to stay that way.

After all, Tom was her best friends son and completely off limits.

But that didn’t stop the flirting. They both seemed to enjoy it, Tom as much to blame as she was.

Tom had an intense gaze which made her feel light headed and happy.

She had been single so long, she had almost forgotten how intoxicating it could be to be wanted by a man.

Tom’s light touches, intense looks and banter brought it all back and it made her feel reckless.

Roz watched her best friend dance with her son and she laughed at their antics.

She was happy tonight.

“That is the worst dancing I’ve ever seen.” Ian remarked grinning.

Roz laid a hand on his arm, which lay on the table. It was a casual gesture, she was laughing so hard, she didn't notice it and yet it sent a shock wave through Ian’s body.

He couldn’t help looking down to see her skin on his, somehow seeing it made it more real, tangible.

Roz touching him like this held a familiarity he secretly loved.

He didn’t move away, he stayed still, hoping to prolong the contact.

She withdrew her hand after a moment or two and Ian felt the loss of her touch instantly.

He laughed as he lit a cigarette, hiding from the wind inside his t-shirt.

He had barely taken two drags before Roz noticed that he was smoking.

“Can I have a drag.” She asked, sliding her fingers along his to take his cigarette.

Ian allowed it, revelling in the intimacy of it.

Without asking, Ian lit himself another cigarette, giving Roz the one she had taken off him.

She smoked while watching Tom and Lil dance.

Ian didn’t realise that he had become the object of her attention until he looked at her and froze at the expression in her eyes.

He had caught her giving him a serious eye fuck.

Ian had sometimes thought he’d seen a flicker of something resembling attraction in Roz's eyes, but until this very moment he’d thought it was just wishful thinking on his part.

Ian thought Roz was a stunningly beautiful woman.

She was pin up gorgeous and the fact that she was his best friends mom didn’t change the attraction he felt towards her.

The years had not lessened the school boy crush he’d had on her since he was twelve, instead it had developed into something even stronger.

He glanced away briefly, to see if he’d imagined it.

But when he looked back, Roz was still staring at him with heart stopping intensity.

His entire body reacted to that look.

He smiled at the dancers idly, his mind in turmoil.

Maybe it was time for him to take things between them to the next level.

The thought of actually showing Roz how much he wanted her made his stomach twist with fear and excitement.

Could he do it?

How would Roz react if he came onto her?

Ian knew he would have to be bold enough to find out or the not knowing would drive him insane.
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The entire time it took to put Tom to bed, Ian was thinking of Roz.

He was uncertain and more nervous than he could ever remember feeling in his life.

What if she pushed him away?

What if she was angry?

But no, there was no mistaking the heat in her glances or the way she looked at his body when she thought he wasn’t looking.

Ian was willing to risk it.

Tom fell asleep fast, the excessive amounts of wine he’d had today knocking him out like a blow to the head.

Ian left him and went to the room he always used when he stayed over.

He could hear Roz in the kitchen, tidying up after their little party.

He waited, his body trembling with nervous excitement, his heart beat in overdrive.

He heard her pass his room and without weighing the consequences any further he opened the door.

Roz paused when she saw him.

He was an absurdly gorgeous sight bare chested, with only his board shorts slung low on his hips. His blond hair was a mess as usual, his face set determined lines.

“Do you have everything you need?” she asked, trying not to stare at him like a freak.

Ian hesitated only for a moment before he pushed himself forward into action.

“No.” He said, shaking his head.

He stepped closer to her, right into her personal space and she didn’t move away.

Ian leaned down and kissed her quickly.

It wasn’t much of a kiss at first, a dry press of lips, no more.

Roz seemed to freeze, but she didn’t pull away, her breath hitched in her throat.

Ian kissed her again, this time his tongue swept along her lips asking for entrance.

Roz kissed him back and Ian’s entire body reacted.

Roz knew that this was wrong, but it felt so good to finally kiss him.

The ever present attraction between them had only been a prelude to the explosive, decadent electricity which surged through them now.

Their kiss deepened and Roz's body melted into Ian’s, her hands on his chest. His skin was heated and smooth beneath her hands, her fingertips coming alive at the feel of him.

Their breathing was harsh filling the silence of the house.
She pulled back slightly, staring at him hard, trying to remember why she should stop this now, before it was too late.

Ian watched her wrestling internally with the moral ramifications of whatever this was between them, but he didn’t want her to think, only to feel.

She tasted sublime, of wine and a hint of tobacco and her own unique flavour.

She felt just right in his arms and he had no intention of letting her come to her senses.

Ian put his arms around her and pulled her closer, kissing her again.

Roz whimpered with desire as he thrust his tongue shamelessly into her mouth, heat pooling between her thighs as desire took over completely. 

Roz's hands were in Ian’s hair tugging him closer, as she finally kissed him back, their tongues duelling in erotic savagery.

She pushed him away for another brief moment as she tried desperately to recall why this was such a bad idea, but Ian didn’t let her think for even a moment.

He pulled her back into their kiss with growing insistence and finally hunger took over completely.

There was no thought given to stopping now, their bodies melded together as closely as possible while still fully dressed.

Ian slowly walked Roz backwards into his bedroom, she didn’t resist.

The door was pushed shut and they were in the privacy of a room for the first time.

Roz allowed Ian to push her onto the narrow bed, his muscular body coming to rest between her thighs.

Ian drew back from the kiss briefly, his gaze locked with hers in a deeply intimate surrender.

He wanted to show her just how much he wanted her, no one else.

Roz was aroused more than she could ever recall being before, her entire body was thrumming with delightful electricity.

Ian sat on his haunches, between her thighs and boldly reached for the button on her denim shorts.

She held his gaze mercilessly as if she were reassuring herself that this was what he truly wanted.

Ian didn’t flinch or shy away from the probing intimacy of her gaze, instead he kept eye contact as he undid her shorts and pulled them off.

Her tiny lace panties were next and then every one of his fantasies came true as he slid his body down along hers.

Her soft thighs lifted around him and instinctively he flexed his hips against her velvet heat making them both groan loudly.

Roz was beyond rational thought, as Ian’s hard body came to rest against her. The unbearable knot of need wound tighter when he thrust against her.

Her hands fell to his board shorts, stroking the smooth tanned flesh just above the waistband.

How many times had she secretly thought about doing exactly this?

Too many to count.

But the reality was so much better than the fantasy.

The scent of his skin, salty and wild, the heat of his superbly muscled body pressed up against her, it was everything.

Ian urged her to push his shorts off entirely and then he was kissing her again, his tongue in her mouth, driving out all rational thought.

His aroused body was against her and then inside her and Roz cried out as he filled her completely.

Ian was no virgin, that much was obvious, as he began to move against her, stealing her breath and making the ache deep inside her build deliciously.

Roz had never felt this was with Harold, indeed with anyone else.

Ian and Roz moved together, their hunger for each other perfectly matched.

They were soul deep kisses and bodies moving together in perfectly synchronized rhythm towards completion.

Their cries were carried away on the gentle sea breeze as their bodies shattered into one another, creating a bond which was unshakable.

Chapter Text

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The first time the four of them went out in public together since they had become couples, was a revelation to say the least.

Roz and Lil were completely open with each other about what was happening with their sons. Their unethical foursome was unconventional, but it seemed to be working for them.

Roz felt a twinge of uncertainty the first time she’d actually seen Tom kiss Lil and Lil had confessed to Roz earlier that same day that seeing Ian with her had been awkward at first.

The unease was soon forgotten though, mainly because they were all so relaxed with each other.

Tom told his mother that he had always liked Lil and thought she was drop dead gorgeous, he had simply used her affair with Ian as an excuse to make a move on her friend.

Ian told her that he loved her, just the thought of his tempestuous, almost morose declaration brought a smile to her lips.

Despite being married to Harold, Roz knew that she had genuine feelings for Ian.

Roz knew what she had to do about her marriage.

She discussed the proposed move with Tom and neither of them could bear to leave their home or Lil and Ian.

The answer was plain to see.

Roz wasn’t sure why the thought of ending her twenty year marriage didn’t bother her more than it did.

Had she ever been in love with Harold?

That night, they decided to go to a nearby restaurant for dinner.

To any onlookers, they were a perfectly normal group.

Two friends and their sons out for a meal.

It was only on closer inspection that the truth could be guessed at and then abruptly dismissed for being ridiculous.

The boys asked for nothing more than their significant other’s company, they were looked after and content, both physically and emotionally.

They spent time with their friends, but they preferred to be with their women.

Of course, to an onlooker, this would seem strange.

Why would two handsome boys prefer to spend time with their mothers rather than in the company of the teenage girls who gathered around them like rabid fans on the beach or at school?

There really was no answer to this riddle, unless you looked below the surface and followed all the unlikely clues.

Ian would lean in close, when he spoke to Roz, his arm slung possessively along the back of her chair.

Tom was more relaxed, but just as attentive to Lil, their body language intimate without even trying to be.

They relaxed as they drank wine, their laughter carried away on the warm evening air as conversation flowed easily.

Suddenly and inexplicably, whatever tension had been between them vanished and they fell into their usual roles, it was as light and easy as breathing the warm sea air.

For them, this adjustment was natural, as if it had always been meant to be.
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The first time that Roz felt out of her depth in her relationship with Ian was the day he decided to go down on her.

Literally.

They had been having sex for a few weeks at this stage and their connection had grown to such proportions that they were perfectly in tune, both in and out of bed.

Ian was extremely territorial with her, which she secretly loved.

Despite the fact that she was still married to Harold, their idyllic, secret world seemed secure.

Mainly because Harold’s impending return was not for another week.

Lil now knew about Roz and Ian, as did Tom.

Roz still wasn’t sure how she felt about Lil and Tom’s budding affair.

But she could hardly talk, now could she? When she found it impossible to resist Ian’s advances.

Ian was far from physically innocent but until now his relations with Roz had a respectful edge which she found rather endearing.

But with their intimacy growing in leaps and bounds, things were bound to evolve.

Ian found Roz busy in her kitchen one evening, Tom was at Lil's, leaving them all alone.

She barely heard him before he was there.

He stood close behind her, his lips on the nape of her neck while his nose was buried in her short hair.

A shudder of the purely sexual kind ran through her as Ian’s hands slid around her waist, stroking her belly through her short dress, before reaching upwards to cup her breasts.

Roz moaned softly, leaning back into Ian’s body in surrender.

It had become a routine that he come to her house as soon as the sun set, where he stayed all night.

Here, away from prying eyes, they could be submerged in their own private world.

“I missed you.” He told her, directly beside her ear.

“I missed you too.” Roz sighed lifting her hands to his hair.

Ian turned her around and kissed her deeply, causing her knees to grow weak.

He lifted her onto the counter behind them, pushing his way between her legs, hands lingering and caressing her skin as if he was worshipping every inch of her.

Roz was passed self recriminations about her relationship with Ian.

It was so good to be with him, it drove rational thought from her mind.

Ian was like drug to her starved senses, this thing between them was everything.

Never in her life had she experienced such physical pleasure and it was completely addictive.

Ian unbuttoned her dress as they kissed, pushing the offending fabric off her shoulders eagerly.

She wore a burgundy bikini underneath the dress, from her swim earlier that day.

Ian tugged the halter neck straps undone and bared her breasts to his avid gaze. Her nipples pebbled at once, begging for attention.

Roz could feel every inch of him against her, he smelt of salt, sea and boyish deodorant.

His aroused flesh was cradled between her thighs, directly against her heated flesh.

Her eager hand lifted Ian’s white t-shirt off over his head, before sliding onto his chest.

Roz could feel his heartbeat in her fingertips, their gazes locked in true intimacy, nothing hidden. She felt like she was drowning in him and he felt his whole body react to her touch.

She was beautiful, he thought, his lips following the trail his fingers had taken, admiring her body with his lips and then his tongue.

He loved the sound Roz made, somewhere between a sigh and a breathless moan, whenever he touched her.

Her nipples were hard buds between his lips as he laved them with his tongue, the need to make her cry out loud drove him on as he pulled her bikini bottoms off.

Ian adorned the taste of her and he had been dying to show her just how much.

Not letting her protest, Ian sank to his knees between her spread legs.

She was the perfect height perched on the counter top. He held her knees apart and kissed his way along her thigh.

Roz tried to hold him off, once his goal became clear, but he refused to let her.

To say she felt uncomfortable with this was an understatement.

Harold had never done this!

Their marriage had always been uninventive and bland.

Harold had never shown the inclination to ... oh god!

Roz moaned and shuddered as Ian’s mouth touched her so intimately.

He had always wanted to try this and he’d never found the need to do it to his two previous girlfriends.

But Roz was another matter, Ian wanted to worship her with every part of himself.

His arousal built with each moan and whimper from her mouth, only to spike to an all new high when he looked up and caught Roz watching him.

Roz had never been more mortified and turned on in her life, this was Lil’s son on his knees giving her unimaginable pleasure with his lips and tongue.

The sight of him doing just that while watching her was too much for her body which began to tremble wantonly.

Her hands were in his hair, her body moving of it’s own accord against Ian’s undoubtedly talented mouth.

The coil inside her tightened unbearably and then shattered, leaving her free falling back to earth.

Ian didn’t hesitate to rise to feet and lift her down.

Together they stumbled through the kitchen and down the passage way to the spare bedroom, where it had all begun between them. Their lips locked together passionately, Roz could taste herself on his tongue.

Once in the bedroom, Roz pushed Ian down onto the bed, before straddling his prone body.

He guided her body onto his with a groan of pleasure.

This was them together, this was coming home.

Chapter Text

Roz and Lil were both feeling a bit uneasy about the boy’s visit which was happening later that day, but both for completely different reasons.

Roz always found it hard to be around Ian, even now after all these years. Breaking it off with him had been the hardest thing she had ever done in her life and those scars still ran deep.

Ian had always blamed her for treating their relationship like a game, instead of the nearly three year long relationship it had been.

Ian had asked her why their relationship had been linked to that of Tom and Lil – why did what Tom did have anything to do with them? She still couldn’t quite answer that question.

Roz recalled her original intention of standing unified with Lil, their solidarity was the only thing she could offer her friend when Tom had broken her heart.

But now, five years later, she couldn’t bear to think of her foolish decision to let Ian go.

Ian appeared to have moved on, but Roz knew differently.

He had never asked Hannah to marry him, despite having a child with her.

He was strangely aloof from his own family, keeping a distance emotionally, like perhaps he was still waiting for something or rather someone.

He still looked at Roz, when he thought no one was watching, with a hunger which was startling. Mainly because she felt alive to the tips of her fingers when she saw it.

The connection, the intimacy between them was always there.

Roz had never been so attached to any other human being in her entire life.

She would never admit it, but she missed him dreadfully.

There had been no one else since Ian, how could there be?

Because Roz was still completely in love with him.

Despite their age difference, or maybe because of it, they had been absurdly compatible sexually. Sex with Ian had always been a soul shaking event which had cemented their passionate relationship.

There was no replacing Ian, not for Roz. She had a strange feeling that he was it for her, her soulmate.

She had never told him that and sometimes she wished she had.
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Lil was happy and nervous about Tom being here with his wife and daughter.

She hadn’t seen him in a few months even though he still lived with Roz in between jobs. He was often on the road for his plays.

They were due to stay for the long weekend at a bed and breakfast not far from where Roz and Lil lived.

Mary didn’t like to visit much, although she tried to hide it.

Something about the way that Tom and Ian related to their mothers bothered her a great deal, although she couldn’t put her finger on what it was.

Hannah shared her lack of enthusiasm for these visits, but neither of them could put it off forever.

There was something about the two older women which made Mary and Hannah feel like outsiders, intruders in their own families.

Tom and Ian however were the exact opposite, they were completely relaxed and happy being home and it showed in their attitudes.

Mary had long since noticed how familiar Ian was with Roz, there was none of the usual deference or respect someone would have for their mothers best friend. He spoke to her with a casual familiarity which was confusing.

Of the two young women, Mary was the conniving, astute one, where as Hannah was sweet and gentle.

Mary watched their interactions, forming her own conclusions. But, she was so completely focused on the mystery of Ian and Roz, that she ignored the exact same behaviour between her own husband and Lil.
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After a sun soaked day on the beach, they had dinner together at Roz’s house.

The little girls were put to bed by Lil, who read them their favourite story and kissed Tom’s daughter, Alice, lovingly on the forehead. She loved her own granddaughter dearly, but, away from prying eyes she often dreamed impossible dreams of Tom’s daughter being her own or at the very least, of Mary vanishing and leaving her to raise Toms child.

Lil went home early, making her excuses and saying her goodbyes.

She kissed Mary before she left just so that she could kiss Tom, without causing comment.

Lil felt her belly flutter with excitement as Tom’s gaze darkened as their eyes met.

“Will I see you before you leave?” she asked, feeling ridiculously breathless.

Tom smiled, her favourite lopsided smirk, his gaze intense.

“Yeah, I hope so.”

Lil left with a pounding heart and a soft smile on her lips.

It was an hour later when Tom made his excuses to go for a walk to sober up.

Roz had called him on the amount he’d had to drink and he had used it immediately to get away from them all for a little while.

His eagerness to go alone made Ian look at him suspiciously, his face unreadable, his curiosity piqued.

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Ian followed Tom as he made his way down the familiar road towards Ian’s childhood home.

Anger built inside Ian as he walked, each footstep as loud as a drum beat in his head.

He knew he was about to witness something he wished he didn’t have to see.

There was only one reason for Tom to be sneaking off to see Lil.

It was so obvious, he wondered why he hadn’t seen it sooner.

They'd never stopped. It had all been a lie.

Perversely, Ian had to see it with his own eyes, despite knowing what Tom was doing with Lil in the dark house, he needed to witness their betrayal for himself.

The wound left in his heart by Roz throbbed mercilessly, never fully healed, it felt like she had stopped their affair minutes before, instead of years ago.

Ian felt enraged, the anger pulsed through him dangerously obliterating all else. But his mind was clear and focused as he paused out side the glass sliding door which led into his old home.

There was no need to step inside.

The curtains were open and Lil and Tom were illuminated by a beam of moonlight, as if they were on some macabre stage.

Tom had Lil on the desk, she was wrapped around him while he fucked her hard.

Their mutual moans and groans reaching Ian through the glass.

They were oblivious of their audience, until Lil opened her eyes briefly, her gaze meeting that of her son.

She gasped and froze alerting Tom to their predicament.

Ian didn’t wait for them to speak, he whirled around and half ran back to Roz’s house.

He could barely contain his anger.

Roz had originally stopped their affair because Lil and Tom had stopped theirs.

Tom had been getting married for fucks sake!!

And yet he was still fucking Lil, while Ian had lost Roz, the only woman he wanted!

Ian knew he had to see Roz, he needed to tell her – they had broken up for nothing.

The pathetic waste of it all, the years without her, left a bitter taste in his mouth. He felt like he was going to vomit.

He barely registered the confused faces of Hannah and Mary as he marched up to Roz and demanded to speak to her in private.

He didn’t care about them.

They were unimportant to him.

Roz took Ian to her bedroom, unthinkingly taking him to the place they had always been comfortable.

The rage inside Ian escalated when he saw Roz sit on the edge of bed gingerly, she was gorgeous and he wanted her.

Fuck, how he wanted her!

Her beauty caused his gut to clench with ever present desire and that made him angrier, why couldn’t he forget her? Why couldn’t he stop loving her?

She should be his!

If it weren’t for Tom and his fucking lies!

“I’m gonna fucking kill him!!!” Ian shouted, beyond caring who heard him. “They really took you for a ride, didn’t they?! You’re telling me you never suspected them? How could you have been so stupid?”

Ian was lashing out at Roz, he was watching himself, as if from the outside. It was like watching a train wreck happening in slow motion and being unable to stop it.

Word vomit, Ian felt he couldn’t keep silent any longer. For too long he had been silent, keeping the unimaginable pain inside. It had been festering like a wound with gangrene for over five years now and the pain threatened to choke him.

“You made us stop, when we didn’t have to.” Ian told her, watching the self control Roz used like shield dissolve before his eyes.

Pain filled her eyes along with tears.

“All the time they...Tom, who was getting married and should have stopped for fucks sake, they were just stringing you along and pretending, laughing at us behind our back and having sex whenever they felt like it!”

Roz suddenly realised that Mary and Hannah had come into the room, their faces curious.

“Ian, we’re not alone!” Roz warned him soft and urgent.

But Ian was beyond reason and well beyond caring.

“What the fuck difference does it make?!” He shouted and Roz flinched, she had never seen him so angry, so broken.

She realised that she had been right all along – Ian had never moved on and this was his breaking point.

Mary watched Ian warily, as she came further into the room.

“Ian, what are you talking about?”

Ian turned slowly to face Mary, his face set, emotionless. His mind was made up instantly, this farce would stop now.

“I just walked across the street and found your husband fucking my mother.” He said his voice devoid of emotion.

Mary blanched, her lips growing pale with shock.

“What?”

“You heard me.” He said harshly, some perverse side of him enjoying her pain, Tom’s wife should know what a dick she had married.

“Ian.” Roz whispered, her soft tone desperately pleading with him to stop this.

Ian felt the anger bubble up again, choking him with acid.

“Don’t fucking ‘Ian' me.” He said with familiarity and venom.

Mary watched him share a loaded, intimate glance with Roz, seeing more than she ever had before.

“As far as I’m concerned, this is all your fault.” Ian told Roz brokenly.

Hannah spoke for the first time, tears in her eyes, her heart broken for Mary.

“How is this her fault?”

Mary smiled without humour.

“Don’t you see, Hannah, they’re lovers as well.”

Hannah stared at Ian, shock and hurt on her face.

“Ian? It’s not true is it?” she pleaded, desperately looking for a denial even though her heart told her it was true.

Everything made sense now.

Ian didn’t reply, he went to stand as far away from his girlfriend as possible, lounging casually against the wall of Roz’s bedroom, like he belonged there.

“Not anymore. She put a stop to it “ he told her, his tone calm now, spent.

Hannah’s face crumpled as hot tears escaped.

“I don’t understand.” She whispered brokenly.

Mary hadn’t moved, her face set in rage and betrayal.

“It couldn’t be simpler, my husband has betrayed me and lied to me from day one. I’m going to go get Alice and leave and I never want to see any of you, ever again.” She turned on Hannah, “If you have any sense, you’ll come with me.”

Hannah looked at Ian hopefully, as if she was waiting for him to beg her to forgive him, maybe she thought he’d ask her not to go.

Ian looked at her tear stained face dispassionately.

“Well, go on then.” He told her, giving her permission to leave.

It didn’t escape her that Ian showed no sign of leaving himself. He was clearly going to stay with her.

Hannah had always found Ian’s strange attachment to Roz a little off, now it all made sickening sense and she felt ill just thinking about them together.

How could he?

With a woman who had practically raised him!

Suddenly Hannah recalled all the times which Ian had said Roz’s name in his sleep, the many times he had mentioned her throughout their relationship.

Hannah turned to leave.

There was no point in staying, because Ian clearly didn’t want her there. In fact, it was becoming glaringly obvious that Ian had never truly wanted her at all.

It was as if their whole life together had been a stopgap for him, a farce.

His heart had never been hers.

“Well, I hope you’re proud of yourself.” Roz told Ian once they were alone, her tone hopeless, broken.
Ian finally looked at her face and felt his heart stop, just as it always did for her.

“I just told the truth. Someone had to.” He shrugged, his arms folded defensively.

Roz rose to her feet and faced him, “No one had to, unless they wanted to cause as much damage as possible, especially to Hannah.”

Ian shrugged again.

“Wasn’t going anywhere anyway, it was best to make it quick...and merciful. “

Roz scoffed incredulously.

“Was that your idea of merciful?” she shook her head angrily, everything was coming undone, first Lil and Tom and now Ian throwing everything away...it was too much.

Her heart felt like it would explode with pain, it had all been for nothing. Her sacrifice of Ian, all these years without him had been for nothing.

The only thing which had made it all bearable was knowing that in giving Ian up, she had set him free so that he could have a family and be happy with someone his own age.

But it was plain to see that Ian had only ever wanted her and Roz’s heart ached with the thought of all the pain she had inadvertently caused by throwing their relationship away as if it had been nothing more than a casual affair.

He was right!

It was all her fault.

Roz felt hot tears fall down her cheeks as she left Ian there and went to say goodbye to her grandchild.

Mary wouldn’t let her near Alice. Alice held out her little hand.

“Granny!” she called, delighted.

“Goodbye darling.” Roz said, waving as the car bearing Tom and Ian’s families disappeared into the night.

Roz found Ian had left, she cried harder, finding herself sitting on the top step to her bedroom, waiting for Tom.

She didn’t have to say anything, or to explain what had happened.

Tom came home alone, looking haunted and sober, his lower lip cut and bruised.

Clearly, Ian had gone back to see him.

“I don’t think their coming back.” She told her son.

Tom nodded, for once devoid of snarky humour.

“Yeah, I know.” He said sitting beside her. “I’m sorry.”

Roz ignored his apology, too angry to speak.

Tom was well acquainted with his mothers ways, he knew he would have to wait a while before she could speak to him.
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Ian had driven out to the cliffs above their beach, he was so messed up about everything, he wasn’t sure how to deal with it.

He had punched Tom after he had left Roz’s bedroom.

They had come face to face on the pathway down to the beach and Ian had just hit him.

It had been reflexive, unplanned, it just was.

Tom had not even tried to fight back, he had taken it and then stood there wiping at the blood oozing out of his cut lip.

He didn’t apologise, what would be the point?

He couldn’t apologise for loving Lil, he would do it all again.

Mary had only been a curiosity to him, a new toy whose shine had quickly diminished.

Lil was everything to Tom. He now knew that he should have married her and not Mary.

Ian and Tom stared at each other, silently acknowledging the mistakes they had both made.

And then Ian left him there.

Ian sat watching the crashing surf below, his gaze blurred with tears.

He had lost everything and yet all he could think of was Roz, even now she was the centre of everything.

He wanted her back.
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Roz allowed Lil to tell her what had happened between her and Tom the next day.

She still didn’t fully trust herself to speak, so Roz remained silent.

Roz felt like she was broken, and despite everything which had happened, it was Ian’s declaration that he blamed her for all of this that hurt the most.

Roz listened to their story and felt her heart break even more.

Tom and Lil had been lovers all along, with only a short break just after Tom and Mary had been married.

Roz thought of Ian’s anguish when she had ended it between them, she relived it all, as she listened to Lil’s story.

Roz recalled just how crazy she had been over Ian, once their unconventional relationship had blossomed into something more.

She had given it up all for nothing.

Silently she cried, while Lil finished her story and then she left her friend and went for a walk on the beach.

For the first time in her life, she couldn’t bear to look at Lil.

Lil followed her as she walked, carefully keeping a distance between them.

She knew that Roz was wrestling with herself and needed space.
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Weeks passed and the boys were home.

Tom didn’t have any new projects until the new year and Ian quit his job in the city and moved back home and Lil welcomed him back to their family business.

Tom made no secret of the fact that he and Lil were together now.

He took her out to the pub, a restaurant and the theatre, holding her hand in public and even kissing her when he collected her from work.

Mary sent him divorce papers, which he signed happily. They would share custody of Alice, which was fine by him.

Lil couldn’t hide her happiness. It glowed in her face and shone from her eyes, making her unbearably lovely. They didn’t care what anyone thought, Lil was finally free to simply love Tom.

Tom spent nearly all his time at Lil’s house which drove Ian crazy.

Their once easy friendship continued to be strained, despite apologies being made and accepted.

And Roz was distant with them all, she retreated into herself in order to heal and forgive.

But she found she couldn’t truly move on, because all she truly wanted to do was be with Ian.

It was wrong, even now that he was a man, the age difference was too great.

How would he feel when she was old and grey and he was still young?

Her insecurities were magnified by the fact that Ian now avoided her.

Except for their daily swim at dawn, where they all congregated on their floating dock, Ian had not approached her since the fateful night when he had ended their farce.

Each day they swan to the dock and lay there absorbing the glorious sunshine and each day Ian would appear last and lay down beside her, as if the years between had never happened.

He never touched her, although the heat from his body burned her more than a physical touch ever could have.

Roz was excruciating aware of Ian, his every breath, the way he’d slick back his too long hair as he climbed out if the water, his gaze when it touched her.

It seemed as if they were back to being in the same old limbo, just like in the old days, but unlike the old days, Roz now knew how he felt and how he tasted.

Things could never be the same again.

Hannah sent Ian a letter, telling him how broken hearted she was and that, despite everything, he could see his daughter whenever he wanted to.

Ian accepted this and told her so, carefully avoiding the subject of her broken heart, for he had no intention of giving her false hope when his heart belonged to another.
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Roz and Ian found their way back to each other the same way their relationship had begun.

It was as easy as breathing.

It was three weeks after the debacle when Ian walked across to Roz’s house.

He was barefoot, wearing only a pair of board shorts and a old band t-shirt.

He marvelled briefly how much he loved walking along the road in this direction, for it was only then that he felt like he was home.

He found her cooking, her back to him.

It brought back so many poignant memories that Ian found himself smiling for the first time in ages.

Roz heard his footsteps and turned uncertainly.

Ian thought that she had never been more beautiful. Her blond hair was slightly longer now, her face just as fucking gorgeous as he remembered it.

He stopped for a moment, his eyes meeting hers. A frisson of excitement rushed down his spine at the intimacy of her gaze, as always, it had the power to move every part of him.

Roz felt her belly flutter to life as thousands of butterflies took up residence.

Ian was here.

He had come to find her.

She wasn’t sure what to do or think.

He looked the same, slightly more mature but undeniably handsome.

He stepped closer and she put down the spoon she had been holding. The soft clatter echoing oddly through the silence of the room.

At last Roz found her voice.

“Ian I...”

He held up his hand, to silence her and he took a few more steps towards her. This was not a time for words, explanations would be made later. For now, Ian just had to kiss her.

He was so close now, she could see the stubble on his face.

His gaze was focused on her, breathtaking and intense. 

Before she could say or do anything to stop this, Ian closed the gap between them and cupped her face with both hands.

He lifted her face to his with an self assurance which hadn’t been there six years ago.

He silently commanded and she acquiesced.

Ian kissed her softly, his mouth lingering over hers for a heartbeat before he deepened the kiss.

Roz’s entire body melted into his.

He smelled of the ocean and sunshine, manly and delicious.

Roz kissed him back, her arms going around his neck eagerly, all protests forgotten.

Because nothing was as important as this, them.

The ever present chemistry between them ignited and they both moaned softly at the wonderfully decadent feeling of touching again.

Roz cried as they kissed, her fingers found Ian’s hair and held him closer.

She loved him, she always had.

This was it for her, this was coming home.

Chapter Text

Roz could not remember being so happy, so perfectly content. She was conflicted about the reason for her happiness, although that didn’t diminish her elation. It had been two weeks since Ian had kissed her. Two weeks of bliss had followed. Of course she had fought it to begin with, it was scandalous and just plain wrong. Yes, she had been attracted to Ian for a while, but she had never dreamed he felt the same.
When he had kissed her that fateful night, she had been swamped with desire, hunger and conflict.
This was after all Lil’s son. Roz had seen Ian grow up, from an adorable baby to the handsome young man he now was. She had always been close to both of the boys, half raising Ian herself.
Roz couldn’t recall the day it all changed, but slowly and surely she stopped seeing him as a child. Her body reacted on it’s own accord, flooding her senses with delightful electricity each time Ian touched her.
One day, while they were just spending time together, the flirting began. At first it was fairly innocent, but then Roz realised quite belatedly, that she had begun to crave Ian’s company far more than she should.
Ian was a willing participant, that much was obvious, although Roz thought at the time that it was just a matter of him trying his charms out on her. Some sort of adolescent crush which would soon pass.
But once they had crossed that invisible line, it was impossible to stop.
Roz had tried to send Ian away, after that first time.
But Ian would have none of it. He was determined not to lose Roz, now that he’d had her and Roz found him impossible to resist.
And now, an entire week had passed. A week where each night was an adventure spent in Roz’s house, the curtains drawn, the two of them completely absorbed in each other.
Roz found her level of guilt seriously lacking too. She had not given Harold much thought at all.
Yes, Roz was happy.
Lil had suggested earlier that they go and gave dinner and drinks at their favourite restaurant. It was above the beach on the rocks. With stunning views across the bay.
Roz was hesitant. This would be the first time they had been out together since they had become more.
She was assured by Lil, no one would suspect a thing. They were all just as they had always been. What went on behind closed doors was no ones business but theirs.
Roz still wasn’t convinced, but she agreed anyway.
Earlier that day Roz had dropped by Lil’s place, as she had a thousand times before and she had caught Tom leaving.
Of course she knew about Tom and Lil, but seeing it had been very different.
Tom had obviously decided not to pussy foot around his mother knowing about Lil. He had greeted his mother, while still pulling on his shirt, grabbed an apple off the kitchen table and pressed a long kiss onto Lil’s lips before leaving with a cheeky smile and a wave.
Lil had tried to hide the dreamy smile of pure contentment she wore, but failed miserably. Any resentment Roz might have felt left abruptly when she realised that she felt exactly the same way about Ian.
What was the use of hiding their happiness from each other?
Roz found it a totally new experience to be with Ian. He was possessive and attentive and yet still kept the necessary public distance. He leaned in when he spoke to her, his gaze intense, eyes filled with an expression she was beginning to know all too well. It made her belly flutter with awareness and excitement.
The restaurant was far enough from their home for them to be amongst strangers, with hardly any chance of being spotted by someone they knew.
They were still cautious, but after a few drinks they became slightly more relaxed and allowed small liberties. Tom’s hand rested on Lil’s thigh under the cover of the table cloth, his foot placed firmly on the bottom rung of her chair. Ian rested his arm along the back of Roz’s chair, staking his claim in a completely male manner, as he sprawled in the chair beside hers. He was gorgeous; all surfer boy sex appeal, messed up blond hair and a lazy smile. For the first time Roz was glad that he was hers.
Other girls and women alike eyed Ian, like children in a candy store, but Roz knew that none of them interested him.
He had eyes for no one but her and that knowledge filled her with pride.
The tension which existed at the beginning of the evening evaporated in the first hour and they all relaxed and laughed together as they always had.
Roz had not felt this happy in her entire life and she could tell that Lil felt the same.
The boys seem to have overcome the anger they had felt towards each other. More realistically, it had been Tom who had been angry, but now he seemed to have forgotten all that.
When they left the restaurant, there was a moment when Ian had taken Roz’s hand in the dark parking lot. It was a simple enough gesture and yet it made her heart pound. She was terrified of being seen by someone they may know and at the same time she was overwhelmed and excited by the casual intimacy of the gesture.
After all they had done together it seemed odd that such an innocent thing, like holding her hand, would have this effect on her and yet it did.
It was as if they were admitted to the world that they were together and that scared her.
It also made Roz feel light headed knowing that Ian wanted to be with her.
She allowed Ian to tangle his fingers with hers and they walked the short distance to their cars.
Ian was driving Lil home, just as Tom would drive with her.
Ian looked at her meaningfully, “Bye.” He told her, releasing her hand with a squeeze. But of course it wasn’t goodbye at all and they both knew it.
Ian would come over as soon as he had dropped Lil off at home.
Their little deceit was reprehensible and far more exciting than it should be.
Roz felt a rush of desire as she thought ahead to when Ian would walk through the door, his intent clear.
She drove home leisurely, with the windows down, the warm sea breeze ruffled her short blond hair and sent a shiver down her spine.
Tom was unapologetic about his liaison with Lil, he was happy, his wide grin was testament to that.
Roz thought briefly about Harold’s return and she knew that leaving here wasn’t even an option.
She asked Tom about his opinion on moving to Sydney to further his career. He was adamant that he didn’t want to leave their home, especially now.
If they left, it would not only mean leaving their idyllic home, but also Lil and Ian.
Neither of them could bear to do that.
And so it was agreed between Mother and son that they would break it to Harold upon his return.
Roz knew that this would catapult them into uncharted territory, because she knew Harold and she knew he would not give up on this fancy new job. This would mean the end of their nearly twenty year long marriage.
Her heart fluttered with shameful exhilaration at the thought of Harold leaving permanently. Thoughts of Ian and how it would all be so easy with Harold gone filled her usually sensible mind.
Roz would have denied it if she had been asked, but the truth was that she was falling madly in love with Ian.

Chapter Text

Ian knew shit was about to go down between him and Tom. Harold had left for Sydney, soon after arriving home and Ian knew it was because Roz had told him that she and Tom would not move to Sydney with him.
Tom would be furious. It was bad enough that Tom knew of Ian and Roz’s affair, but now it had cost him his family. For Ian had no doubt that this thing between him and Roz was the reason for her decision to stay.
Besides her love for her home, Ian knew that their passionate fucking every single night was too new and damn exciting for either of them to jeopardise.
In the beginning Roz had protested a little, but there was no denying the electricity between them. Ian had known, for a while before they had kissed, that Roz was as attracted to him as he was to her.
It had taken guts, no fucking doubt, to be the one to make the first move. He could still remember how his heart had pounded against his ribcage, how dry his mouth had been and how he had almost felt sick from the tension and yet nothing would have stopped him from sampling Roz’s luscious lips.
Her lips had driven him crazy for so long, full, pale pink and begging for him to explore them, they had haunted his dreams.
Her startling blue eyes had held a curious blend of curiosity and desire each time they were alone. Ian had wanted to take the next step, kiss her, hold her against his body and just sink into her in every way imaginable.
Roz was a beautiful, sexy woman, with pin up curves and a stunning face. In fact Ian thought she was perfect. Way too good for Tom’s father, too good for any man...except him.
The first time Ian had realised that his love for Roz was not innocent was when he was twelve years old. He had been staying over to watch movies with Tom. The boys had gone to sleep on the living room sofas and Roz had come to tuck him in. She had clearly not thought anything of it, of course why would she? Ian had been a pre adolescent boy, a child. But Ian could recall exactly how she smelt when she had leaned over to kiss his cheek. The feel of her lips on his skin had been too much and yet not enough. His heart rate had shot up instantly and he found that he had an embarrassing problem, which he had hidden under the sheet which had been covering his body.
From that day on Roz had been far more to him than his best friends mom. She had been his fantasy come to life, his dream woman. Until the night he made that dream become a reality.
Now, Roz was everything to him. In two short weeks it had all changed.
Ian now knew how her naked body felt against his, he knew how her lips tasted and how her body encased his, driving him to the brink of insanity. He fucking loved the sounds she made when he slid inside her, the way she came undone while looking into his eyes.
No, Ian didn’t feel the need to apologise for his feelings for Roz.
Shit did go down, just as he had expected. The same day Harold left to head back to Sydney, Tom attacked him while they were swimming. Tom was far angrier than Ian had thought.
“I’m going to fucking kill you!”
Tom grabbed Ian and tried to drown him, holding his head under the waves with very real intent. Ian panicked and tried to come up, but Tom refused to let him. That’s when survival instinct had kicked in and Ian bit into Tom’s leg, hard, until he tasted blood.
Tom quickly released him.
Ian was furious himself, Tom had tried to kill him.
“You fucking cunt!” He yelled at Tom.
Tom tried to grab at his injured leg under the water. “Your fucking insane!” he spat, hating Ian in that moment.
Ian walked out of the water breathing had, still shaken from his almost death experience.
Of course Roz and Lil had seen their fight from the beach, they came towards the boys together, but they separated and each went to their lover, instead of their respective sons.
Back at Roz’s house, the tension was so thick you could have carved it with a butter knife. Tom refused to speak to Ian or to apologise and Ian found he was tired of pretending like he gave a shit what Tom or anyone else thought.
Harold was gone. Thank god for that.
Ian came to a decision while they sat awkwardly at the table trying to eat lunch while avoiding the elephant in the room. Enough was enough, Ian was not going to pretend like he wasn’t with Roz. Tom would just have to fucking deal with it.
He at least had not started an affair with Roz out of spite or a misguided sense of revenge, Ian actually loved her.
He had always loved her.
Ian stood up abruptly, leaving the table.
Roz watched him curiously. “Where are you going?”
Ian turned to her, his face unreadable. “To your room.”
Roz looked stunned by his audacity, while Lil rebuked him; “Ian!”
He saw Tom throw him a look of utter loathing, but he didn’t give a fuck. Tom was after all sleeping with his own mother. What room did he have to talk?
He didn’t stop, he went to Roz’s bedroom and threw himself down on her bed.
He must have dozed off for a while, because the sound of the door closing startled him awake.
“What am I going to do with you?” Roz said softly from the foot of the bed.
Ian looked her with bleary eyed intensity, he didn’t reply, he simply stared at her.
She was so fucking beautiful.
Ian held out his arms to her, Roz hesitated, looking guilty.
“Come here.” Ian said, softly.
Roz looked over her shoulder as if she half expected Harold to be standing there.
Lil had gone home to Tom and Roz knew they were quite alone.
Roz slowly kicked off her sandals, before sliding onto the bed tentatively.
Ian was laying on his back, legs spread apart, in a completely manly sprawl. Roz crawled up the bed until she was kneeling beside him.
Ian reached for her, his hands cradling her face, pulling her down into a kiss.
A delicious thrill shot through them both at the first contact of their lips. Ian took advantage and rolled over until Roz was beneath him.
Mine, he thought.
And she was

Chapter Text

It was a beautiful afternoon, the golden sand glistening in the bright sunlight as turquoise waves chased each other towards it. There was the inevitable rush and then a soft sigh as the water reached its destination only to be pulled away once again in its never ending cycle. Roz bit her lip hard, the faint taste of blood on her tongue a warning to ease the pressure. Her nerves were drawn so tightly they were on the verge of breaking.

What was she doing here? How had this ever seemed like a good idea?

Ever since she had reconciled with Ian she'd been dreading this very moment.

The moment of truth. It was Ian’s birthday, his twenty-fifth to be precise and she was his date. The awkwardness of the situation was not in any way made easier by her best friend openly being with her own son. Lil and Tom made no secret of their relationship now, in fact one could say they flaunted it.

The truth was that Roz still felt decidedly awkward being with Ian even though she'd never loved him more. The fact that people would see her as the inevitable Mrs Robinson galled her endlessly. It was trite how people fell into old assumptions so easily without ever knowing the truth.

All that had led them here, to this moment, was heart-rending. They deserved this surely, after so much heartache? Years of self denial and lies had finally ended in a happily ever after. Roz was unrepentant for that, she had to be with Ian, that much was clear by now.

It was only two weeks since Ian had taken those first steps to fixing what she'd broken. This was still new - not hiding, being together.

Ian squeezed her fingers - which were interlaced with his own. She knew exactly what had put that shit-eating grin on his handsome face. The half hour stop at a lay-by high above their beach had once again pushed Roz out of her comfort zone, delicious urgency had pulsed through her entire body as Ian had shown her exactly how flexible she could be in the front seat of her SUV.

Ian was unconcerned with their neighbours' reactions to their new status as a couple. He seemed to be revelling in the very act of claiming her as his and this made her glow from the inside out, despite her protests. Roz's heart skipped a beat as she fell head long into Ian's dark and mysterious green gaze, his happiness was contagious and his smile made her knees weak. He was undeniably handsome tonight, his surfer boy charm blatantly obvious. His tanned skin contrasted starkly with the white shirt he wore, his dark blond hair long enough to fall into his eyes. His effort at appearing smartly dressed was somewhat lost with all his innate savagery just beneath the surface. Roz knew all too well that he was as unpredictable as a summer storm, his moods mercurial and his personality tempestuous. A smart shirt and trousers couldn't hide the man beneath, he was as wild as the waves he loved to ride. She'd always had a way with him, even as a child his moodiness had confounded Lil while Roz had always been able to calm him. Ian's only anchor was her. He tugged her even closer, into his side, until he was all but wearing her on his skin. Roz watched dry mouthed as he lifted their intertwined hands and placed a lingering kiss on her knuckles, inhaling deeply. She knew how he loved her scent.

Her pulse quickened as she recalled his ability to reduce her to mush. There really were no boundaries with them anymore and it showed. She'd never felt so physically connected to another human being in her entire life. Roz suddenly felt safe as Ian tugged her up the stairs to his mum's house. They were so close it was almost impossible to tell where one ended and the other began and Ian would have it no other way.

Lil had thrown this party for her son, but Roz knew it also had the dual purpose of revealing their new relationships and silencing the local gossip.

People stared. Particularly Saul. He openly gaped at Lil, who was oblivious. Tom stood behind her at the bar, his arm around her while he smoked with the other. Roz nodded at several people somewhat stiffly, before hugging Lil one armed because Ian refused to let her go. Lil laughed good naturedly and kissed her best friend's cheek.

"You look stunning." She told Roz, before leaning up to kiss her son. "Happy birthday my darling." She said.

Their interactions were observed keenly by almost everyone at the party. Roz felt her belly tighten in unease.

Ian greeted his mother, shook Tom's hand and then pulled Roz onto the makeshift dance floor. She laughed in protest, but the laughter died as Ian’s arms closed around her and the ever present electricity between them was ignited. The music was slow, with a sensual latina vibe which allowed for close contact. Ian took full advantage of her very low-backed dress, his fingers danced along her spine, all the way from just above her buttocks until they reached the nape of her neck just under her short hair. Her eyes turned tilt, safe from detection in the semi darkness, she was breathless and already aroused but desperate not to be.

The highly sexual nature of her relationship with Ian would hardly calm the gossips! Indeed it would only add fuel to the fire.

"I don't fucking care." He murmured beside her ear, correctly interpreting the look on her face. His heated breath washed over her skin, causing her hair to dance. A shiver of the most sexual kind swept along her entire body leaving her nipples hard and her body filled with longing. Ian was undoubtedly her kryptonite. She was powerless to stop the drowning want she experienced each time they touched. It was like a drug.

Roz pulled herself together with a deeply fortifying breath of cool sea air. The sun was beginning to set and the temperature dropped along with it.

"You should care. I do."

Ian pulled back to study her face, his expression playful and decidedly unrepentant.

"I was forced to live years without you. I won't go a moment longer pretending like you're not mine."

Roz sighed, he was right. Did it really matter what these small minded people thought?

They would invariably talk, no matter what they did; Roz was Ian’s mothers' best friend. She'd watched him grow up! There would be questions. Their age difference alone was enough to fuel gossip for decades to come.
She could imagine the topic of their debates; how long had she been sleeping with Ian? Had she molested him as a child? Had she seduced him during one of those sleepovers with her son? Roz was sick to her stomach at the thought of those sickening insinuations.

"Happy birthday." She said instead, to change the subject.

Ian watched her, his gaze enigmatic and then he smiled. It was slow and sensual, designed to infiltrate her composure. "Thank you. This is the first birthday in a very long time that I truly feel happy."

Roz looked at him with a reluctant smile. Ian leaned in suddenly to claim a kiss. It was brief and chaste compared to the kisses they usually shared, but her heart leapt, threatening to jump right out of her chest.

There was a lull in the conversation around them and Roz could feel everyone staring.

Ian pulled back from the kiss and tilted her chin upwards with a single finger, not allowing her to focus on anything but them.

"I love you." He told her simply and she couldn't doubt it, everything else paled in significance. "I love you too." She whispered and her entire being sang with the sincerity of it. The joy of being with Ian was indescribable. It was as if Ian had been made especially for her. Harold had been nothing in comparison, a waste of time really. The only reason she couldn't regret the entire marriage was that it had brought her Tom.

Tom walked past at that moment and handed a beer to Ian.

"Happy birthday, mate." He said with a cheeky smile, all animosity long gone.

Ian accepted the drink and took a very large sip before saluting his old friend in thanks. The conversation around them resumed, a few whispered conversations openly censored their involvement. Words like 'intolerable' and 'scandalous' reached Roz's ears but she chose to focus on Ian. They could say what they pleased, she knew there really wasn't any option but this. Because she couldn't live without him, she'd tried and failed.

They danced a lot that night. They spoke to everyone and ignored the curious glances and even the more penetrative stares. There was cake and Lil took plenty of photos, acting for all the world as if it were only natural for her best friend to be dating her son.

Roz left with Ian around midnight, their footsteps muted by the still warm sand. Roz sighed in relief as the sounds of the party died away.

Ian didn't ask permission, he merely took her car keys and drove. The headlights cut a sharp beam through the inky blackness along the winding road. The trees rushed by, making Roz sleepy, although her entire body was alive with expectant excitement. Her hand rested on Ian’s thigh, her fingers stroking lightly along the muscular expanse of flesh beneath the smart black trousers. Her small finger occasionally brushed the hardness at the apex of his thighs. She watched his profile, admiring his large hands gripping the steering wheel and changing gears. There were thick, colourful woven bracelets on his wrist, lending a bohemian edge to his otherwise pristine image.

They weren't going home, that much was clear.

Ian stopped the car and cut the engine leaving them in darkness. He got out of the car and Roz found herself breathing hard, anticipating what was to come. He was there moments later to pull her out. She didn't hesitate to follow where he led, she was eager, indeed, desperate, for the taste of him.

They didn't speak, the silence loaded with a million emotions and needs too multifaceted to voice.

She could hear the faint thunder of the ocean as well as a storm brewing miles away. Ian took her to the front of the car where he lifted her into the heated bonnet with ease. Her gasp of surprise was cut short by his mouth, driving need and urgency in each swipe of his lips and tongue. Roz's belly flip flopped wildly as Ian took control and she let him.

Chapter Text

Ian loved the sensation of holding her. It had been years since he'd allowed himself to think about it, but his favourite thing in the world was the feel of Roz draped all over him - naked. Right at that moment she slept along his right side, plastered to his body, her leg between his, her head on his shoulder. He inhaled deeply, memorising the scent of her hair. He was completely happy, blissed out in fact. Although a nervous feeling lay heavily in his gut. He was going to do it. Today. Now. He was going to propose to Roz.

There was nothing he wanted more than for her to be his wife. It was the perfect day for it too, it was her birthday. Their birthdays were only three weeks apart, a coincidence of fate perhaps. He smiled as she moved slightly, stretching before her dark eyelashes fluttered and then parted to reveal the most remarkable eyes he'd ever seen. As blue as the ocean, arresting and downright unforgettable. She moved him in ways which should be illegal.

Ian smiled at her and his heart skipped a beat when she returned it with a sleepy smile. Her lips were innately kissable, full and defined, they were perfect. With his arm around her shoulders, he slowly lifted her until their lips met in blissful sweetness.

"Good morning." He murmured. The velvet smoothness of her skin was like a drug to him.

Roz returned his kiss with an expertise which left him breathless. His experience with other women had never come close to this. No one had ever made him feel this way. With Roz there was this insane desire to become one with her in every way possible. He wanted to breathe her in, taste and touch every part of her. The sound of her pleasure gave him a darkly addictive twist of excitement which often drove him on to truly blow her mind.

He left her briefly to make coffee and a small tray of her favourite fruit. Roz never ate a full breakfast. Clad in only a thin nightgown she stood by the floor to ceiling window admiring the view. The early morning sunlight was bright and it left nothing to the imagination which made Ian smile wolfishly.

Roz chuckled at his expression and then her own softened as she took in the tray with the early morning offerings alongside a hastily picked yellow rose from the garden. Ian spoiled her and she loved it.

"Happy birthday, beautiful." He said, as he placed the tray on the small table beside the window and took her hands in his. With deft tug he pulled her into his arms and was rewarded with a sultry laugh. Her voice did indecent things to his body, it always had.

"Thank you." She whispered, kissing him slowly, as if she were savouring the moment.

"Marry me." He said without any warning.

Roz blinked at him, her lips parting in shock.

Fuuuck, she was just so goddamn perfect - so beautiful. Ian’s heart raced as he waited for her answer.

"You don't have to do this." She said after a moment's hesitation.

That wasn't the answer he'd been looking for.

Roz pulled away from him slightly, her face serious. "We're together, we're happy, we don't have to be married."

Ian cupped her face. "I want to marry you, more than anything."

Roz stared at him, her expression pensive. "What we have is so much more than marriage. Trust me. I've done marriage and it isn't what you think it is."

Ian shook his head. "I have no idea what marriage is supposed to be or mean, I just know that I want you to be my wife. I love you Roz and I want us to belong to each other in every way humanly possible."

She bit her lower lip and then smiled at him, her eyes warm. She was unbelievably touched. Ian watched her, his heart in his eyes. He was sick with the thought of her refusing him. He needed this, for Roz to belong to him in every way imaginable.

Moments passed, which felt as long as hours. Ian didn't move or pull away from her, holding her like his anchor. She was what grounded him, she always had been. He knew her so well, he could see the thoughts and emotions play out in her expressive gaze.

She looked terrified. And then, like a wave washing away debris on a beach, the fear was gone and in its place was serenity. He wondered briefly what had brought about that change, but then, it didn't matter.

"Yes." She said simply. "I'll marry you."

Ian grinned at her as she slid her arms around his neck. "Really?"

"Yes, really."

Ian kissed her, deeply, his happiness too overwhelming for mere words.

He dropped to one knee before her and took out the ring he'd bought for her seven years ago, soon after they'd first begun their illicit affair. When he'd been a stupid teenager desperately in love with his best friends mother. But he'd never found the right time to give it to her. The time hadn't been right and then it had been too late.

He'd always kept it with him, even after Roz had sent him away five years ago. Hannah had even thought it was for her at one time, when she'd found it while packing away laundry. He'd sidestepped the issue and made excuses at the time, anything to deflect her interest in the ring. He couldn't have given it to her anyway, because it had always belonged to Roz.

It was platinum, simple and yet costly, with a single, large uncut sapphire in the center. He'd worked all summer to afford it. No other ring would do for the woman he loved, because it was the colour of her eyes.

Roz looked down at him, her face raw with emotion. These emotions were written across her face plainly for him to see.

He took the ring out of the box and slid it onto her finger. It fitted exactly.

Ian's heart actually summersulted, he was ecstatic.

"If you marry me, I'll make you the happiest woman in the universe." He vowed, kissing her finger and the ring reverently.

"I already am." Roz said softly and there were tears in her eyes.

Ian quickly got up and walked her backwards towards the bed. Their lips met and time ceased to exist. The addictive sensation of wanting took over and there was just them.

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Hannah hated this situation. She hated Ian for what he'd done to them. Why had he done it? She still didn't understand.

Roz was undoubtedly a beautiful woman, but Hannah still couldn't get over the fact that Ian had known her his entire life. It was so wrong it bordered on incest.

Although she would never admit it, she found Roz intimidating. There was a regal self assurance about the older woman which made Hannah feel gauche and young in a stupid, unbecoming way.

Today was a pivotal moment. The first time that Hannah would take their daughter to stay with her father since they'd split up. Ian had of course been to see his child, always alone and presentable. Hannah had made it plain that she wanted him back, but Ian ignored this and her less than subtle overtures. She didn't dare ask about Roz. Since the dreadful night when Ian had revealed the disgusting and shameful truth about his relationship with his mothers best friend, Hannah had not spoken her name nor asked about her in any way.

Ian had of course moved back home and Hannah was more than a little hesitant to take their daughter there. But it was not something she could avoid forever, no matter how much she wished she could.

The scenery stole her breath as she drove down the winding road towards the beach house. It looked the same, although everything had changed since she'd last been there.

Ian walked towards the car as Hannah parked, but he came from the direction of Roz's house. Hannah felt irrational anger threaten to choke her. Where had he just come from?

Sophie jumped up and down in her seat as she saw her father. "Daddy!" She cried, her face pressed up against the glass.

Hannah sighed and drew in a deep, fortifying breath. She could do this.

Ian pulled open the door and unclipped the seat belt, releasing a wildly excited Sophie into his arms. He laughed and kissed her all over her face. He was a devoted father and she knew he would never let any harm come to their daughter.

Hannah got out hesitantly, not really knowing what to say. This was so unbearably awkward.

"I'll drop her off on Sunday." Ian told her with a small smile.

She nodded, tongue tied.

"Do you want to come up?" Ian asked, gesturing to the house.

She couldn't help herself. "Why are you there?"

Ian squinted against the light, he looked undecided.

"It's Roz's birthday." He told her.

Of course they were all one big happy incestuous family again, Hannah thought scathingly. She had an urge to take her child and run.

Curiosity got the best of her. "Yes, I'll come up."

Hannah realised that she'd not once asked Ian what his relationship now was with Roz. Were they together?

She felt sick to her stomach but forced herself to follow as Ian led the way towards the house where Hannah had discovered the true reason Ian had always been so distant from her. That memory had overshadowed everything.

Hannah was an innocent woman, the kind to go through life meekly doing what she thought she ought to. She'd always been much less experienced than Ian in many aspects of life. Particularly in bed. This had never bothered her until she'd learned where he had acquired that expertise. Imagining Roz and Ian together made her feel a jealousy like she never had before in her life.

Ian placed Sophie on the ground and laughed as she raced ahead to the house. She flung open the door and disappeared inside. There was a squeal of joy as she ran straight into her grandmother, in Roz's kitchen. Ian followed closely and Hannah far more hesitantly.

Roz was there with Lil and Tom. They all looked very relaxed. Hannah greeted the room at large, deliberately not using their individual names. They greeted her in return. Sophie sat on Lil's hip already holding an ice lolly.

Roz lifted her glass and took a long sip, cradling her glass like a talisman against evil. Hannah was struck again by how lovely she was. Her hair had recently been cut and styled and she looked chic and very poised. She was wearing a short dress which showcased her slender body to perfection.

"I should be going." Hannah said, needing to escape. Now that she was here she couldn't think why she had wanted to.

Hannah took one last look at Roz and froze, her gaze riveted on the ring, on the third finger of her left hand. It was the ring. The one Ian had carried around for years.

Why had he given it to her?

"Why is she wearing your ring?" Hannah said in a choked whisper.

Ian shifted his weight from on foot to another and crossed his ankles nonchalantly. "Because it was always meant for her." Ian said blandly.

As if on cue, Lil and Tom quietly excused themselves and left the kitchen, taking Sophie with them. Roz stayed, which was significant.

"I'm not trying to hurt you." Ian continued. "But I think you need to know the truth."

Hannah lifted her chin and gripped her car keys tightly, anger was her only defense.

"I've asked Roz to marry me and she said yes." Ian said with unmistakable happiness in his voice.

Hannah stared at him as if he'd lost his mind.

Roz said nothing, wisely staying out of it while still being supportive to Ian.

"Do you have any idea how ridiculous this is?" Hannah said harshly, her heart in tatters. Ian had never asked her to marry him. The ring she'd presumed was for her at one point had actually been for Roz. Bile rose in her throat until she thought she'd choke on it.

Ian and Roz exchanged a glance which was familiar and absurdly intimate. They were communicating about her, she just knew it.

Hannah was overcome with jealousy.

"What you think, doesn't really matter." Ian told her firmly. "We're happy."

"Im taking my daughter home with me! I won't leave her here with you! You're both sick!" Hannah spluttered.

"No, you're not going to take Sophie." Ian said calmly. "I'll get a court order if I have to, Hannah. We aren't doing anything wrong. Our relationship doesn't break any laws."

Hannah blinked rapidly to stop the tears from falling. He was right, they were doing nothing illegal, although morally it was all kinds of wrong.

"We thought it best not to hide any of this from you." Roz said at last, her somewhat husky voice calm and sensual.

Hannah felt like a fool.

"I'm going to go." Hannah said stiffly, trying desperately to hold herself together.

She walked out blindly, not bothering to say goodbye as she started the car and reversed.

In her rear view mirror she saw them standing on the wrap around verandah. Ian stood to one side with his hands in his pockets watching her leave. Roz walked up to him and slid her arms around his waist, her head on his shoulder. Their casual intimacy made her feel even worse.

Hannah had seen enough. The wheels spun as she accelerated far too fast.

She had to get away from them. Her heart was broken. She knew now that she'd lost Ian for good. Any hope of getting him back was obliterated by the sight of him and Roz.

They were getting married.

Hannah sobbed, tears rushing down her face freely.

It was all over.

It had to be.

Chapter Text

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Ian shuddered as Roz raked her short nails across the skin of his chest and stomach. His body twitched as he tried to control his insane reaction to her.

But it was useless, no matter how many times he tried he was helpless to resist her seductive touch.

He fell apart every time she took control like this. It was his fantasy come to life, to have this beautiful woman make love to him.

Roz watched him closely as she hovered over his prone body, her hand stroking his turgid length slowly. She was long passed trying to rationalise her intense attraction to Ian, he was her fiancée now and she was allowed to drive him to the brink of insanity.

Ian's impressive abdominal muscles contracted fiercely as Roz lowered her mouth to his erection. He groaned loudly as his hands went to her head.

He gathered her short hair in his hands and pulled it off her face so he could watch her...watching him.

Her ocean blue eyes practically glowed, back-lit by the early morning sunlight. Ian was spellbound.

There was no embarrassment or shyness between them, just a deep connection which was addictive.

He didn't urge her to move, he simply let her take the lead. Ian had always been all too willing to follow anywhere Roz led him. Her hands found hidden places which drove him to the brink of madness while her mouth took him in until he hit the back of her throat. He jerked into her spasmodically, unable to hide his reaction.

She didn't stop. Not until she tasted his release.

But Ian didn't allow her to be unsatisfied. He lifted her up until she sat on him, his length already hard and willing beneath her.

Roz eagerly obliged, rising slightly to sink down into him, a gasp of pleasure on her lips as he filled her to the brink of insanity.

She rode him slowly, savouring each sensation; the feel of his skin, his hard length deep inside her, the light golden hair that dusted his chest and abdomen, which she caressed with her fingers as she rose and fell over him.

Their lovemaking often took hours when they had nowhere to be. Their insatiable need for each other was as addictive as an illegal substance.

Ian watched, mesmerised, as Roz rode him. Her body sublime in the light streaming through the window. Perfectly toned and beautifully shaped, she was every one of his teenage fantasies come to life.

Her small breasts were perfect, nipples hard and proudly erect. He wanted to taste them and so he did, sitting up until his lips could feast on her flesh. Roz cried out, her back arched as Ian's mouth ravaged her breasts.

They rocked together, faster with each stroke until their mutual cries filled the room.
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They swam at the cove. It was Roz's favourite spot to swim.

It held wonderful memories as well as being the perfect swimming beach. They frolicked in the surf, oblivious to the world at large.

Ian dragged Roz under the surface several times while she swam. But Roz was a strong swimmer and she soon got her revenge.

Eventually they made it to the floating dock where they often met with Lil and Tom.

But today it was just them.

Roz stared at her hand as if mesmerised, while laying on her belly. The rocking of the dock had lulled her into a half awake slumber. The ring on her finger sparkled brightly and she smiled softly to herself. Ian watched her through slitted eyes from his position beside her. It was as if she couldn't quite believe that they were engaged. Her smile made his heart miss a beat.

"Do you regret it?" He asked, stroking along her spine.

Roz turned her head to face him completely.

"No." She shook her head somewhat ruefully. "Maybe I should, but I don't. I only worry that you'll regret it eventually."

Ian looked serious as he brushed the hair off her forehead.

"That's impossible."

Roz rolled onto her side, her head balanced on her hand, while the other one came to lie on his chest. The ring sparkled with the movement.

"I can't give you children." She said softly. Regretfully.

Ian returned her smile, his hand covering hers.

"I have a child - but even if I didn't - all I need is you."

He leaned in and kissed her, savouring her petal soft lips.

Roz looked unconvinced and yet accepting. She didn't want to think of the future. It was here and now she preferred to focus on. The years without Ian had made her appreciate every moment they spent together.

They spent the entire afternoon on the dock, swimming and just making out. It was blissful. Eventually they made their way back to the shore. The sun was beginning to set and the sky was splashed with iridescent scarlet and moody violet.

Walking back towards the house they hesitated to hold hands. Old habits die hard and it was still new to them to be able to show public displays of affection.

Ian was usually the one to initiate such things. Roz allowed it but never made the first move. But today she found herself longing for the close contact. She craved the deeper meaning of such a small, innocent and yet remarkable gesture.

Resolutely, Roz reached for Ian's hand, her gaze already on his face as his eyes flashed to hers. With a small smile his fingers tangled with hers eagerly and her belly gave a flutter. He pulled her into his side, closer still.

She fit perfectly under his arm.

They walked home like that. It felt good to be able to claim Ian as hers.

Roz was happy, in a way she never had been before.