Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Friday night finds Oikawa at a bar, chatting amiably with a cute stranger.

His name is Tsukasa, and he’s a recent college graduate who majored in finance. Oikawa isn’t particularly interested, but Tsukasa sure thinks that finance is something you make small talk about in a bar.

He also thinks that his joke about how he learned Spanish in high school, and did Oikawa want to go home with him because “Mi casa es Tsukasa,” was peak comedy.

Oikawa finds that a little endearing.

And besides, he’s not here looking for a boyfriend, he wants a hookup. He wants the casual hookup he never had the courage to try in college.

Iwaizumi is sitting a few tables away, messing with his phone. He came as a safety precaution: Oikawa has had some rotten luck with cruising for a hookup. In fact, since he started this endeavor, he is zero for four.

(The first guy got too pushy and Oikawa wanted to back out, but he had continued to pressure Oikawa and even threatened him and Oikawa had to run to the bartender for help. That’s why Iwaizumi comes with, now.

The second guy had discovered Oikawa was trans and explained exactly how disgusting he thought Oikawa was.

The third guy had kissed Oikawa at the bar and been such a terrible kisser that Oikawa called the whole thing off.

And the last guy turned out to be not a guy at all, but a very butch lesbian, who thought Oikawa was also a lesbian. That one was awkward for everyone.)

Why was this so difficult? It was never this hard for Iwaizumi. Back in college, Iwaizumi definitely got enough action. Was it because he was so much more masculine than Oikawa? Was it because he had the “right” genitals?

Oikawa had been lucky enough to have incredibly supportive parents, and he started his medical transition at fourteen. Graced with the small-boob genetics of generations of women on both sides of his family, his top surgery had been a keyhole and left almost no visible scarring.

At twenty-four, a solid decade of testosterone in his system, and years of competitive sports lending him an athletic physique and his impressive height makes him, by most estimations, definitively male.

But the Lesbian Misunderstanding, as he’s been calling it, has stirred up his old fears. Why had she thought he was a woman? Were his hips too wide? Were his shoulders not wide enough? Was it the shirt he was wearing? His hairstyle? He thought he had laid these fears to rest years ago, but here they were again.

Was this why he could never find a boyfriend in college? Why he couldn’t find a decent hookup now?

Tsukasa has already invited him back to his place, so Oikawa decides to reveal his “situation” to him. He isn’t a huge fan of doing it at the bar, but he needs to make sure Tsukasa is safe to go home with, and if not, he needs Iwaizumi around to bail him out. So at the bar it is.

“So, you ready?” Tsukasa asks.

“Yeah, I just want to tell you something before we leave,” Oikawa says, painting on his most charming smile.

“Oh, alright, go ahead.”

“I just… I’m trans, you see, so I don’t have the same equipment you might be expecting. Is that still okay?”

“Oh, that’s fine. I’m actually bisexual,” Tsukasa says.

Oikawa makes a face. “Why does that matter?”

“Well, because I’m into pussy, too.”

Yikes. “It’s just, the way you said it sounds like you don’t see me as a man. Like you said you’re actually bisexual, so you’re also attracted to women.”

“Well you’re kind of a woman, if you have a pussy. Don’t worry, I think it’s hot.”

Double yikes. Triple yikes. Infinite yikes.

Oikawa sighs. “Okay, well that’s actually really gross.”

“What?” Tsukasa scoffs indignantly. “How is that gross? I called you hot. I like pussy.”

“No, you called me a woman. And that’s incredibly rude. Also stop saying ‘pussy’. I’m sorry, Tsukasa, but this isn’t going to happen.”

Oikawa starts to walk away, when Tsukasa grabs his arm.

Dammit.

Fortunately, Iwaizumi sees everything, and he’s there in an instant, before Tsukasa can say whatever nasty remark he had planned.

“Oikawaaaa,” Iwaizumi fake-slurs. “I’m sooooo drunk, Oikawa. Will you take me home? I wanna go home.”

“Oh, Iwaizumi,” Oikawa sighs, as though this is a terrible imposition. “Why did you drink so much? I’m not cleaning up your vomit.”

“Speaking of vomit, I think I’m gonna…” Iwaizumi says, and he pretends to gag a little bit and turns in Tsukasa’s direction.

Tsukasa has something of a brain after all, it seems, because he doesn’t want to get thrown up on, and so he scurries away. “What the hell, man?”

Iwaizumi fake gags again.

“I’m sorry, I’ve gotta take him home. He’s a real mess when he’s this drunk,” Oikawa says.

“Whatever, asshole. Stop leading people on, in the future, yeah? It’s a real dick move,” Tsukasa says, and leaves.

Iwaizumi drops his drunkard act immediately. “A dick move? He’s one to talk. I didn’t hear everything, but I saw body language and your face. Yours was not the dick move tonight.”

“He told me it was ok that I had a pussy because he was bisexual, and when I told him that was poorly worded he got mad at me for not taking his compliment,” Oikawa explains.

“Eugh, gross. I’m sorry this happened again,” Iwaizumi says. “You wanna stay or just go home?”

“Let’s go home. I’m not in the mood to be out anymore.”

Iwaizumi pays for his drink and they leave. The walk home is quiet, despite Iwaizumi’s attempts to lighten the mood and distract Oikawa from his disappointment.

When they get home to their apartment, though, the dam breaks.

 “It’s gotta be me, right? Like I’m doing something wrong. What am I doing wrong?” Oikawa says, tears falling against his will.

“No, Oikawa, you’re not doing anything wrong. People are assholes. You didn’t do anything wrong at all.”

“But this happens to me all the time. You didn’t have this problem back in college! You wouldn’t have it now, either, if you were looking for someone. It’s me. I’m the problem.”

“No, you’re not. And it’s not like I never struck out or got rejected or found out someone wasn’t safe either. You just didn’t hear about it.”

“Yeah? Name one time someone turned out to be dangerous to go home with.”

“Did I ever tell you about Pill Girl?”

“What? Who’s Pill Girl?”

“I went to a party with Mattsukawa, second year, in maybe January? February? Anyway, it was cold out. I was getting ready to go home with this girl and when we got our jackets, she pulled out a bag of pills.

“I was taken aback, obviously, and asked what they were for. She said they were ecstasy. Said we should take them all and see what happened. There were at least thirty pills in the bag. No way would that have been anything but lethal. I panicked, tried to take the bag from her because I thought she was actually going to do it.

“She just started laughing. I think she must have already taken one before, or something. Anyway, she wouldn’t give me the pills and I didn’t know what else to do. So I went and found the host of the party, told them what was going on. And I left.”

“Damn,” is all Oikawa can say.

“Yeah. So I get that it sucks, but it’s not you.”

“It’s just sort of feeling like I’m never going to find anyone, you know? Like, I lowered my standards so much, but it seems ‘civil human being who treats me as a real man’ is too high of a bar.”

“It’s really, really not. Look, maybe you need to look outside of bars and stuff.”

“Like where?”

“I don’t know, take a yoga class or something.”

“Ugh, pass.”

“I’m just trying to help.”

“Yeah, well…” Oikawa sighs. “Did I ever tell you about the only time I ever had sex?”

“Not in any detail, no. Like, you said you weren’t a virgin, but…”

“It was terrible. Like, honestly everything about it was awful. I wanted to do it so bad because I felt like I was falling behind, somehow. Everyone else was having sex, and I wanted to, too. But I wasn’t even really turned on, and the guy was super rough. It hurt.”

“Didn’t you say something?”

“Honestly? I was embarrassed. So I ended up faking an orgasm so he would stop.”

“Oikawa!” Iwaizumi exclaims. “No, if someone is hurting you, even by accident, you have to tell them. And never let someone get away with bad sex! If they’re bad, you tell them! Don’t fake an orgasm so they think they’re actually doing something right.”

“Yeah, yeah. But I just thought it was my fault, you know? Like I wasn’t into it. So that was my fault.”

“No, dude, that was definitely his fault. If you weren’t even turned on, that’s his fault. He needs to work harder.”

“Whatever, I’m still probably bad at sex. How can you be good at something if you’ve never done it? I mean, I know I’m naturally talented at a lot of things, but…”

Iwaizumi chuckles. “The good news is, with the right partner, ‘skill’ doesn’t matter so much. You’ll talk things through, tell them what feels good, what doesn’t, that kind of thing.”

“Yeah but…What if I meet a great person and then I’m bad in bed and they ditch me!”

“Then they’re an ass for not being patient enough with you.”

“But what if something’s wrong with me?”

Iwaizumi sighs. “Oikawa, what is this about?”

Oikawa curls his knees up into his chest and doesn’t reply for a moment.

Iwaizumi waits, though, and eventually Oikawa caves. “I just… I’m twenty-four and basically a virgin. I just feel like I should have a decent sex experience at this point in my life. But thanks to my situation,” he says, gesturing at his crotch, “I can’t just go find someone at a bar. Because every time I try, it doesn’t work out.”

“But what’s the rush?”

“I have needs, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa says, smiling a little sadly.

“So what, you want you want lessons or something?”

Oikawa snorts. “Are you offering?”

There’s a beat where Oikawa realizes that Iwaizumi’s not taking his comment as a joke. Iwaizumi wasn’t joking.

“I mean, you trust me, right? And I’m not normally one to brag, but I think I’m pretty good in bed,” Iwaizumi says matter-of-factly.

“You would deign to sleep with me?” Oikawa doesn’t quite believe this conversation is happening, but he’s not exactly upset that it is.

Iwaizumi deadpans at Oikawa. “Let’s not pretend like you’re not incredibly good looking. It would not be a hardship on my end.”

“Yeah, but if I’m really bad…”

“Then we’ll talk it out. And figure things out. It’s really not rocket science,” Iwaizumi shrugs. “I think you can figure it out.”

“With your expert guidance, of course,” Oikawa teases.

“Hey, you said it, not me.”

They stare each other down for a minute: Oikawa, trying to gauge how serious Iwaizumi is being, and Iwaizumi trying to prove to Oikawa with the slow raise of an eyebrow that he is, in fact, dead serious about this.

“Okay. Okay, yeah, let’s do it,” Oikawa says finally.

“Cool,” Iwaizumi says with a smirk. “You mean like, right now? Tonight?”

“No, get your planner out, let’s compare schedules,” Oikawa bites sarcastically. “Yes, now. You only had like one drink at the bar, and I’m completely sober. Let’s do it.”

Iwaizumi shrugs. “Your room or mine?”

“Hmm, yours. That way it’s your bed that gets messy and not mine.”

“Ok sex rule number one,” Iwaizumi says, putting a hand up, “is be considerate of your partner. You are absolutely helping me clean up afterwards.”

“Fine, fine. But still, your room please.”

Oikawa doesn’t want to admit it, but the truth is that he doesn’t want to associate his own bed with this.

Either this is going to go very poorly, and he’ll have to fall asleep every night in a bed rife with embarrassing memories of failure, or it’s going to go well, and he’ll have to fall asleep every night in a bed rife with arousing memories of sex with his best friend.

Both outcomes are going to give him memories, and he wants his room to be separate from all that.

Iwaizumi doesn’t seem to care, or at least he doesn’t say anything, so Oikawa follows him to his room with a nervous bounce to his step.

Unsure what to do when they get there, though, Oikawa lingers by the door.

Iwaizumi opens his top drawer and pulls out condoms and lube.

“Whoa, we don’t need lube,” Oikawa says. “No butt stuff. I have another, uh, avenue and I’m not interested in that.”

“We should have lube, even for your ‘other avenue’,” Iwaizumi says, not without a trace of amusement. “First, you’re nervous, and so you might not be as naturally lubricated as if you were totally relaxed. Secondly, you’ve been on T for years. That makes things drier, too. So we are going to use lube, okay?”

“Why do you know about vaginal atrophy?” Oikawa asks in disbelief.

“Maybe I’ve done some research,” Iwaizumi says haughtily.

“Unbelievable,” Oikawa whispers to himself.

“What, it’s unbelievable that I’ve done research on how to have sex with a trans person? Rule number one, Oikawa. Consideration for your partner.”

“You’ve had sex with a trans guy before?”

“Well, no, but I’m uh, prepared for the event anyway.”

Oikawa narrows his eyes. “Do you even know any other trans guys?”

Iwaizumi won’t look him in the eye. “I’m not… It would be rude for me to… I mean…”

“Holy shit!” Oikawa laughs as it clicks into place. “You’ve thought about having sex with me before tonight, haven’t you?”

Iwaizumi splutters and turns bright red. “No! Shittykawa! Why would I think about having sex with you?”

“Because you think I’m hot, obviously. You already told me that much,” Oikawa says giddily, finally abandoning his spot plastered to the door to skip over to the bed.

“I can rescind my offer at any time,” Iwaizumi threatens.

“No!” Oikawa yelps. “I mean, no, please. It’s okay, I mean I’ve… It’s not like I haven’t had a sex dream or two about you. So we’re even, right?”

(It’s definitely been more than a dream or two, but Oikawa isn’t about to admit that.)

“I fucking knew it,” Iwaizumi grumbles. He takes a deep breath and sighs it out. “Are we still doing this or what?”

“Yes, please. Teach me how to be as successful in bed as Iwa-chan-sama,” Oikawa says, sitting up on his knees.

“Why am I chan and sama?” Iwaizumi asks, rolling his eyes.

“Well you’re always Iwa-chan, but I’m trying to follow rule one and be considerate.”

Iwaizumi barks out a laugh. “Whatever. Ok, so before we begin, anything you’re either very interested in doing or very not interested in doing? You already said no ‘butt stuff’, and I’m not planning to do anything crazy, but just in case.”

“Um… I don’t think so? I don’t really know, to be honest.”

“Alright. Well then just speak up if something is uncomfortable for any reason. Or good, you know, so I can do it again.”

Oikawa nods, but he’s starting to get a little nervous again. “Actually, um, there is something?”

“Yeah?”

“Can we… Before we do anything, can we like, kiss?” Oikawa asks, fidgeting with his fingers. He adds in a rush, “because like, the guy I was with, he absolutely refused to kiss me, and it just felt really… clinical. Detached. I don’t want that.”

“Of course. I’m a fan of kissing, actually: it’s good foreplay.”

Oikawa lets out a sigh of relief. “Okay, yeah. Great.”

“And maybe if we kiss enough, you’ll fucking relax. Here’s rule number two: sex is supposed to feel good. Sure, what ‘feels good’ means to different people varies a lot, but if you’re anxious and freaked out, it’s not gonna feel as good. So I want you to remember that, okay? We’re doing this to feel good. To have fun. Relax.”

Oikawa offers a wobbly smile in return. “I’ll try.”

Iwaizumi jerks his chin at Oikawa, who is still sitting on the bed, to indicate that Iwaizumi wants him to move up.

Oikawa decides to try to follow rule two, so he flops back onto Iwaizumi’s bed, bouncing a little as the springs protest. He wriggles into the pillows with a shy grin.

Iwaizumi looks at him fondly and wriggles out of his jeans before joining Oikawa on the bed. “I’m not trying to rush things, I just don’t like wearing my jeans in bed.”

“Yes, I know about your pajamas only policy, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa says. They settle in, on their sides, facing each other.

“Glad you understand,” Iwaizumi tells him. “So, you ready?”

“There’s only two rules? Be considerate and feel good?”

“No, dumbass, I just don’t have like, a pre-written list. I’ll tell you the rules as we go. Hands-on learning,” he adds, waggling his eyebrows at his attempted pun.

“That was awful,” Oikawa laughs.

“I’m sorry, I’ll put my mouth to better use,” Iwaizumi says, leaning in.

Oikawa sucks in a quick breath, and then Iwaizumi’s lips are on his, and they’re kissing.

Oikawa is no stranger to kissing, and even considers himself fairly good at it, if the comments of his past kissing partners are anything to go by. (He briefly considers that they were lying just to get something out of him, but figures he can’t be that awful.)

Iwaizumi, it seems, is no stranger to kissing, either. He sets the pace, gentle but firm, his broad hand on Oikawa’s jaw, guiding the angle of his head.

It doesn’t take too long for Iwaizumi to open his mouth, and Oikawa eagerly does the same. Iwaizumi’s tongue darts into Oikawa’s mouth, just little flicks at first, as they get used to each other and set a comfortable rhythm.

As they go, Iwaizumi begins to push deeper into Oikawa’s mouth, his tongue sliding over Oikawa’s own, tasting his whole mouth.

And then Iwaizumi sucks on Oikawa’s tongue, and Oikawa can’t help but let out a surprised noise. Iwaizumi shifts his attention to Oikawa’s lips, sucking on the upper one briefly and then tugging and nibbling at the lower one.

He does this a few times before he pulls away completely, sighing contentedly. “That’s called a preview kiss,” Iwaizumi says smugly.

“A preview?” Oikawa asks, a little dazed from the intensity of the kissing.

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi says with a wicked grin, “for when I eat you out later.”

Oikawa’s jaw drops. How is Iwaizumi so casual about this? Oikawa had said “butt stuff” and called his genitals an “avenue”, like some prudish parent resorting to euphemisms while giving the sex talk to their child.

“How dirty, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa stutters out finally.

Iwaizumi laughs. “That’s gonna be rule number three: sex isn’t shameful. Say what you want.”

“Easy for you to say,” Oikawa mutters.

“Yeah, it is. Because I refuse to feel like, grossed out by something that’s totally normal and healthy. This isn’t some bodice-ripper novel, there’s no… I don’t know, trembling members and italicized mentions of ‘down there’. Just say what you mean.”

Oikawa bursts into laughter. “’Trembling members’? What kind of drivel have you been reading, Iwa-chan?”

“Shut up,” Iwaizumi says playfully, putting his hand over Oikawa’s mouth to prove his point.

Something flashes in Oikawa’s eyes, though, at being physically shut up.

He freezes and stares wide-eyed at Iwaizumi, and Iwaizumi doesn’t miss the way his pupils dilate.

“Oh, well then. Jotting that down for later,” Iwaizumi chuckles darkly, and he removes his hand to replace it with his lips once more.

The kiss is a little more urgent, this time, and Iwaizumi’s hands start to roam all over Oikawa’s back and sides. He drags Oikawa’s shirt hem up with hot fingertips, touching smooth skin.

Oikawa is more than pleased with this development, and easily mimics the action on Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi’s hands drift down to cup Oikawa’s ass, next, and yeah, that’s definitely doing something to Oikawa.

He breaks away, breathing a little harder than he’d like to admit, and realizes that Iwaizumi’s no-jeans-in-bed policy was a good idea. He rolls away from Iwaizumi to fumble the button and zipper open on his jeans, wriggling his way out impatiently.

“Good idea. I didn’t want to pressure you or anything, but jeans in bed is never a good plan,” Iwaizumi states.

Flinging his jeans across the room somewhere, Oikawa rolls back towards Iwaizumi and pulls his face to his own.

Iwaizumi picks back up where he left off, running his hands down Oikawa’s back. He trails his nails lightly across Oikawa’s skin. Oikawa smiles into the kiss, pulling back just enough to whisper, “that tickles.”

“Does that mean stop or do it harder?” Iwaizumi says, his voice low and a little husky.

“Mmm, harder,” Oikawa breathes.

Iwaizumi digs his nails in a little harder, scraping his way down Oikawa’s back in a way that might leave faint scratch marks. Oikawa thinks he might like that.

Iwaizumi’s hand continues its exploration, travelling down to his thigh to hike Oikawa’s leg up over Iwaizumi’s hip.

Their hips are flush against each other now, and Oikawa can feel exactly how much Iwaizumi is enjoying this.

However, thinking about Iwaizumi’s dick also makes him think of ‘trembling member’.

He bursts into laughter.

“What?” Iwaizumi demands.

“Trembling member,” Oikawa explains through his giggles.

“God dammit,” Iwaizumi swears, but he’s trying not to laugh now, too.

After a moment, Oikawa gets himself under control, and though he’s still smiling, he kisses Iwaizumi’s cheek and jaw.

They settle back into a rhythm, and Oikawa decides that he really likes the way he can feel Iwaizumi against him, so he shifts so that he’s straddling Iwaizumi fully.

Iwaizumi accepts his weight with a sigh, and now that he has two hands free, both of them palm at Oikawa’s ass and scratch at his back.

“Can I take your shirt off?” Iwaizumi asks in between kisses down Oikawa’s neck.

“Only if you take yours off too,” Oikawa says.

Iwaizumi somehow sits them both up, with Oikawa now in his lap, and they break their kissing only to get their shirts up over their heads.

Oikawa has always appreciated how well-muscled Iwaizumi is: when they were younger, a lot of it was jealousy, because Oikawa wanted muscles to make him look more masculine, but he just didn’t like weight-lifting that much, and so his muscles are lean and long.

Iwaizumi isn’t bulky, per se, but he’s athletic and has good definition. Even now that they’re not playing competitive volleyball every day, he’s kept in shape.

Now that he’s allowed to openly look, Oikawa gets his fill.

“Right back at you,” Iwaizumi says, noticing Oikawa’s ogling.

“Oh please, your body is amazing,” Oikawa says.

“And so is yours. We have different builds, but I like your body.”

“Different builds, yeah, or different chromosomes,” Oikawa mutters, mood slightly soured.

“Okay, that’s rule four: no self-deprecation during sex. And that includes being jealous of your partner. Don’t compare yourself to me. I told you before we started this, you’re really good-looking. I honestly think that. And I’m flattered that you like the way I look, too. But trust me, okay? Your body is great. It’s… it’s perfect, because it’s yours.”

Oikawa buries his face in Iwaizumi’s neck. “Sap.”

“I’m just being honest, alright?”

“Still a sap.”

“Fine, I’m a sap. Can we get back to things, or are you going to mope some more?”

“No, I’m done moping,” Oikawa says, and his smile is only a little fake.

“Good,” Iwaizumi says, and captures Oikawa’s mouth again.

Slowly, as if he’s worried about scaring Oikawa off, Iwaizumi starts to roll his hips. Oikawa isn’t quite sure if he’s supposed to be moving in tandem with Iwaizumi or what, so he sort of experiments with different rhythms until he finds something that works.

What works, in Oikawa’s opinion, is plastering his pelvis against Iwaizumi’s as much as possible, moving in time with Iwaizumi’s rolls so that they never separate.

After a couple minutes of grinding, Iwaizumi pulls back to ask breathily, “you ready to move on a little?”

“Move on?” Oikawa asks. “Like… towards the actual sex part?”

“Yeah. Like, I could follow-through on that preview I gave you earlier.”

“You were serious?”

“I never joke about oral sex,” Iwaizumi says seriously.

Oikawa laughs. “Um, yeah, okay. I mean, no one’s ever… I’ve never… But we can try it.”

“I think you’ll like it,” Iwaizumi says.

“Confident in your skills, are you?”

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi says simply, and it’s not what Oikawa was expecting so he just nods dumbly.

Iwaizumi maneuvers Oikawa onto his back, and with a quick kiss, hooks his thumbs in the waistband of Oikawa’s underwear and tugs gently.

Oikawa lifts his hips up, and then he’s naked.

Naked, in his best friend’s bed.

Things just got suddenly very, very real.

Oikawa has only been fully naked with someone else once in his life, and he doesn’t exactly have pleasant memories of it.

This is a chance to over-write that bad experience, which Oikawa desperately wants, but there’s still that voice in the back of his head that says there’s plenty of time for this experience to go wrong, too.

He takes a deep breath.

“You alright?” Iwaizumi asks.

“Yeah, it’s fine. Just… nerves. I’m relaxing. Rule number two,” Oikawa says, voice tight.

“Good,” Iwaizumi says, and kisses him briefly on the mouth.

Satisfied that Oikawa is alright, just a little nervous as he said, Iwaizumi begins trailing kisses down Oikawa’s body. A couple on his jaw, a few on his neck, some scattered across his collarbones and shoulders, his chest, his ribs, his stomach, his hips.

The further down Iwaizumi goes, the more Oikawa wants to relax, but he’s just really not sure what’s it’s going to feel like. Can you be bad at receiving oral sex? Is that possible? If it is, Oikawa is certain he will be. Bad, that is.

Iwaizumi sucks extra hard at the skin on Oikawa’s hip, and Oikawa looks down at the sharpness.

“You still with me?” Iwaizumi asks.

Oikawa nods noncommittally.

“We don’t have to do this, if it’s too much or whatever,” Iwaizumi says gently.

“No, I want to, I really do,” Oikawa replies earnestly.

“You don’t really seem into it. Not like when we were kissing, at least.”

“I just don’t know what it’s gonna feel like. So I’m like, imagining things. I don’t know. Can you just… do it? The anticipation is what’s killing me.”

Iwaizumi laughs gently. “Yeah, alright. That should be rule five: speak up. Advocate for your own pleasure. If you want me to move things along, say so. Good sex requires communication, not you freaking out silently over who-knows-what.”

 “Got it. Please continue, Iwa-chan-sama,” Oikawa says, trying to bring some humor back to the situation.

“Your wish is my command,” Iwaizumi says, and he gently pulls Oikawa’s legs apart and positions himself so his face is level with Oikawa’s crotch.

In the second before Iwaizumi’s mouth touches him, Oikawa feels at least a hundred different versions of disaster flash before his eyes.

When Iwaizumi’s tongue makes contact with his clit, though, the only thing flashing before his eyes are sparks of pleasure.

“Whoa,” Oikawa gasps, and Iwaizumi takes that as encouragement.

He takes Oikawa’s clit in his mouth, working his lips and tongue over him.

Iwaizumi is not shy as he continues to suck and lick and tease at Oikawa. He swipes his tongue broadly across Oikawa’s slit, ending in a long, slow kiss to his clit.

And it clicks.

Iwaizumi is doing the same thing with his tongue that he did when they were kissing earlier.

Oikawa’s processing too many physical sensations to do much more with that information, but he files it away for masturbation inspiration later.

Oikawa’s breath is escaping him in hiccupping sighs. He tries to take deeper breaths, shuddering as Iwaizumi continues to absolutely devour him.

And then, Iwaizumi starts to hum. It’s low and rumbling and completely overwhelms Oikawa in the best way. His legs are starting to shake, clenching around Iwaizumi’s head. His hands scratch and claw at the sheets.

Holy shit.

And then Iwaizumi stops.

Oikawa whines at the loss, but it seems that Iwaizumi stopped for a reason.

“Can I finger you?” he asks.

Oikawa whimpers.

“I need an actual reply, please,” Iwaizumi reminds him.

“Yeah, sure, holy shit, just please keep going oh my god,” Oikawa babbles. He’s honestly kind of surprised at himself for being able to form a coherent sentence.

Iwaizumi kisses the inside of Oikawa’s thigh first, and then returns to Oikawa’s clit, literally slurping it into his mouth. That noise should, by all accounts, be disgusting, but Oikawa doesn’t really care. He throws an arm over his eyes, unable to process both visual and physical input.

And then Iwaizumi slowly pushes a finger into Oikawa, and Oikawa absolutely groans at the sensation.

He barely moves the finger at first, letting Oikawa get used to the feeling first. He licks gently at whatever he can get his mouth on, and slowly beings thrusting his finger in and out, working Oikawa back up to that earth-shattering feeling. It’s like nothing Oikawa has ever experienced: the heat, the gentle friction, the pull of Iwaizumi’s lips.

“More,” Oikawa breathes, and Iwaizumi adds a second finger.

Oikawa has never been a huge fan of penetration, not even during masturbation, but he also doesn’t think he’s ever been this turned on, and so instead of it just being boring at best and painful at worst, he’s honestly enjoying it.

Iwaizumi increases the pace of his fingers, continuing to work his lips and tongue all over Oikawa.

The leg-shaking is back and Oikawa realizes he’s about to come. Is he supposed to tell Iwaizumi? It seems polite, at least. He’s not sure he can form a sentence, but he can probably manage one word.

“Hajime.”

Well that’s not exactly the word he meant to say—something like “coming” would have been more useful—but hopefully it serves as enough of a warning, because it’s too late to try again.

His eyes scrunch closed, as his orgasm seizes his entire body, and he fights to breathe. He sucks in a desperate gasp of air as Iwaizumi coaxes him through the aftershocks. He removes his fingers but continues to lick at Oikawa, lapping up his come.

That probably tastes disgusting, Oikawa thinks distantly, but it feels good so he’s going to try to ignore it.

When his breathing slows down enough that he doesn’t feel like he’s heaving, Oikawa opens his eyes. Iwaizumi has settled in on the pillow next to Oikawa, and he’s staring openly with a huge grin on his face.

“How do you feel?” Iwaizumi asks after a moment.

“Wow,” is all Oikawa can say. He swallows against the dryness in his mouth from panting so much.

“That good, huh?” Iwaizumi says, and he looks just a little bit smug.

“Yeah,” Oikawa says simply.

“You want to keep going or did I kill you?” Iwaizumi asks.

“Keep going?” Oikawa asks incredulously. “You just…What?”

“Do you want to do anything else?” Iwaizumi asks.

Rule one: be considerate of your partner. OH.

“I’d be happy to uh, help you get off too. Reciprocate, you know?” Oikawa says.

“I’d like that,” Iwaizumi says with a smile. “What are you up for?”

“Do you have a preference?” Oikawa hedges.

“Yeah, but I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”

“Oh my god, just tell me. That’s one of your rules, Iwa-chan. ‘Advocate for your pleasure.’ Follow your own advice, please,” Oikawa teases.

“Alright, fine. You’re right. But you’re still free to say no if it’s too much.”

“Geez, what kind of freaky shit are you into?”

“It’s not kinky, I just… I want to fuck you.”

Oikawa stares. He feels like he’s short circuiting. Sure, they started this because Iwaizumi was going to give Oikawa some tips in bed. And then he went down on him like a professional. And now he wants to keep going, instead of just leaving well-enough alone. He wants to fuck Oikawa.

“But obviously, if that’s too much for tonight, given that you look pretty wrecked already, we can do something else,” Iwaizumi adds when Oikawa doesn’t reply.

“No! I mean, yes. I mean, no, I’m not that wrecked. And yes, I want to… do that.”

“Rule uh, what number was it? Three? Say what you mean. No shame here.”

Oikawa huffs and crosses his arms. Iwaizumi waits.

“Fine, I want you to fuck me.”

“I should make you dirty talk,” Iwaizumi teases.

Oikawa blushes fiercely. “Iwa-chan!”

“What? It’d be hot. Say ‘fuck me’ again.”

“Fuck you,” Oikawa laughs.

“Eh, close enough. So you’re up for it?” Iwaizumi smiles.

“Um, yeah. I’m curious to see what else the great Iwa-chan-sama can offer me.”

“I’ll do my best,” Iwaizumi promises, and he’s so earnest that Oikawa can’t even tease him about it.

“I don’t doubt it,” Oikawa says instead.

Iwaizumi leans in, and Oikawa closes his eyes and waits to be kissed.

“You don’t mind kissing me still, right?” Iwaizumi asks.

Oikawa’s eyes fly open. Oh, right. Iwaizumi’s mouth had been all up in Oikawa’s crotch. Is that gross?

Oikawa shrugs. It’s definitely gross, but sex is a little bit gross, he guesses.

“It’s fine. I want to kiss you, so…”

“Good,” Iwaizumi says, and he seals his lips over Oikawa’s.

They start slow, but the kiss is deep. Oikawa can taste himself on Iwaizumi’s tongue, and he finds he doesn’t really mind that much.

Oikawa is still naked, and Iwaizumi takes full advantage of this as they kiss. It feels like his hands are everywhere. And then Iwaizumi’s fingers dip into his hole, still a little wet from earlier.

Oikawa inhales sharply at the unexpected intrusion, but it feels good, so he relaxes into it. He rocks back onto Iwaizumi’s fingers subconsciously and realizes that he’s letting out little breathy sighs.

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi says, “that’s it.”

Iwaizumi stops for a moment, withdrawing his fingers. “Hang on,” he says. “Just getting a little lube to make sure it’s nice and comfortable, okay?”

Iwaizumi coats his fingers with lube and then prods at Oikawa’s entrance. Oikawa gasps at the coldness, but it soon turns into a moan as Iwaizumi adds a third finger and uses his thumb to play with Oikawa’s clit.

He kisses Oikawa’s neck so that Oikawa is free to pant and gasp as much as he needs to. Iwaizumi sucks hard, and Oikawa thinks he might leave a mark. That’s really hot, for some reason, so Oikawa decides to invoke rule number five.

“Mark me,” he whispers. “I want it.”

Iwaizumi hums, and sucks harder, working his teeth into Oikawa’s skin, too.

Yeah, that’s definitely going to bruise.

Nice.

Oikawa realizes that once again, he’s the only one who seems to be getting pleasure, though, so he reaches down between them to palm at Iwaizumi’s cock.

He’s still wearing his boxers, which Oikawa decides is deeply unfair and is actively in the way, so he tugs at the waistband.

They have to untangle a moment, so Iwaizumi can get them off, but soon enough he joins Oikawa in being fully naked.

Oikawa tries not to stare, he really does, but it’s been a while since he’s seen a dick in person – though he’s seen plenty unsollicited dick pics on dating apps—and he wants to see what he’s working with.

Iwaizumi’s cock looks… well, Oikawa is of the opinion that genitals aren’t really that attractive, but his cock looks nice. It’s flushed with arousal and curves gently upward. It’s also not horrifyingly large, but still enough to satisfy. Oikawa is relived.

He was a little concerned about the whole penetration aspect, given the general dissatisfaction with it he had experienced in his previous encounters, but Iwaizumi has certainly known what he was doing so far, and Oikawa had every reason to believe that would continue.

Deciding to take action instead of just gawping at Iwaizumi’s dick all night, Oikawa reaches down to touch Iwaizumi.

It’s hot to the touch, the skin soft and smooth. Oikawa likes the way Iwaizumi fits in his hand.

Iwaizumi reaches for a condom and the lube again. He rolls the condom down and, taking Oikawa’s hand, pours some lube into it.

He offers a reassuring smile. “Get me nice and slick, yeah? Gonna make you feel good.”

Iwaizumi’s fingers are back in Oikawa, stretching him gently so he can take Iwaizumi’s cock.

Oikawa does his best to spread the lube up and down Iwaizumi’s shaft, until he starts to wonder what position they’ll do it in. He kind of wants things simple, just to fuck in missionary, but he thinks he’s heard that taking it from behind can be easier.

Does he ask? Does he just trust that Iwaizumi will know what’s best? Maybe he can do both.

When he’s fairly certain Iwaizumi is ready, he presses a wet kiss to his lips and asks, “How do you want me?”

“Hmm, I was thinking we should just start with you on your back, and we can move around if it’s not comfortable or whatever. Sound good?”

“Mmm,” Oikawa replies, kissing Iwaizumi again.

“You ready, then?”

“I think so. I feel good,” Oikawa says.

“Good, just do your best to relax. If it hurts at all, say so, and I’ll finger you some more or add some lube to get you there, alright?”

“I trust you,” Oikawa says.

“Good,” Iwaizumi smiles. “Alright, here we go, yeah?”

Iwaizumi gives his cock a couple of pumps, as if to check that there’s enough lube, and then he lines himself up. Oikawa brings his knees up to give Iwaizumi more room.

He kisses Oikawa once, letting go with a wet sound, and then he pushes the head of his cock in against Oikawa’s hole.

Oikawa knows this is the hardest part, that the head is the widest and it’ll feel better once it’s passed, so he closes his eyes and breathes deeply and slowly. On the exhale, Iwaizumi pushes just a little more, fingers playing with Oikawa’s clit to distract him.

After what feels like way too long, Oikawa’s body finally gives, and Iwaizumi slides in almost all the way with a groan.

“Alright?” Iwaizumi asks.

“Yeah,” Oikawa says honestly.

The last time he tried this had definitely been difficult and painful, but the lube and the fact that Iwaizumi had worked him open before seem to have eliminated the problems.

Relieved, Oikawa wraps his legs around Iwaizumi’s lower back.

“See, you know what to do,” Iwaizumi laughs breathily.

“Ha ha,” Oikawa deadpans. “Speaking of knowing what to do, are you going to move? Or—”

Iwaizumi thrusts lightly and Oikawa lets out a shaky sigh.

“Don’t sass the guy with his dick inside you,” Iwaizumi says.

“Is that rule number six? Because I think you actually like my sass,” Oikawa says.

Instead of admitting anything, Iwaizumi thrusts again, a little more forcefully this time.

Slowly, the individual thrusts build into a steady pace. Oikawa can’t say it’s as pleasurable as Iwaizumi’s tongue and fingers were earlier, but it’s showing promise.

Iwaizumi seems to be into it, though, if his labored breathing is anything to go by. True, he’s doing most of the work, but Oikawa thinks he’s into it.

“Tooru,” Iwaizumi pants. “Talk to me.”

“About what?”

“Tell me if it feels good, tell me what you want. I want to hear you.”

Is this a dirty talk thing? Iwaizumi had said it was hot to hear Oikawa say he wanted to be fucked earlier, so he decides to test the waters.

“You feel so good,” he says. “I want you to fuck me, just like you said you would.”

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi says, picking up his pace.

“I didn’t know a dick inside me could feel like this.” Oikawa feels a little stupid saying it, but it’s true enough.

“Yeah, and how’s it feel?”

“Hot,” Oikawa says. He means it literally, but he supposes it’s open to interpretation.

“Fuck, I’ve dreamed of this, Tooru, I’ve dreamed about fucking you like this, it’s just as good as I thought; no it’s better, I—Shit, you feel so good, so good for me, wanna make you feel good, too.”

Iwaizumi seems to be into this whole dirty talk thing. It’s not particularly turning Oikawa on—though he’s plenty aroused by the attention Iwaizumi is paying him—but it doesn’t bother him and it’s clearly something Iwaizumi wants. So Oikawa squashes down as much embarrassment as he can.

“You think I haven’t thought about this too? I have, Hajime, I’ve thought about you fucking me, too. Thought about how you would look, sweaty and straining over me, fucking me so nice into the mattress.”

“Fuck, yes,” Iwaizumi says. His thrusts are getting erratic, and Oikawa is proud of himself for getting Iwaizumi to this state.

Oikawa’s also a bit surprised to realize how close he himself is to coming again. He never would have dreamed he could come from penetration, but then again, Iwaizumi is also working his clit. It’s a real one-two punch.

“Come on, Hajime, that’s it,” Oikawa urges. Trying not to think too much about the words, he adds, “Fucking me so good, nice and deep like that.”

 Iwaizumi grunts again. “Shit, Tooru, I’m close.”

“Good, that’s good, me too, I’m close too.”

Iwaizumi moves a hand to Oikawa’s hip, and he presses his fingers in hard. Oikawa digs his heels into Iwaizumi’s back, and the slight shift in angle is exactly what he needed.

“Hajime, oh my god, I’m—”

Oikawa inhales, exhales, and he comes.

“Tooru,” Iwaizumi sighs, and oh, he’s coming too.

Iwaizumi fucks into him a couple more times, and then all but collapses on top of Oikawa, spent.

He heaves a few breaths, and then drags Oikawa’s face to his own and gives him a brutal kiss.

When he breaks the kiss, he pulls out slowly, and Oikawa can feel the absence of him. Iwaizumi disposes of the condom and sinks back into the mattress next to Oikawa.

Oikawa closes his eyes, willing his heart rate to slow down. Iwaizumi nuzzles against his cheek, and Oikawa smiles.

“I think you’ve made me a believer,” Oikawa says after a couple minutes.

“A believer in what?”

“In sex.”

Iwaizumi laughs. “What, you didn’t think it was real before?”

“No, silly, I didn’t think it was all that great. I mean, I guess I mostly thought I was doing something wrong, but this… This was really… good. Fun. Easy.”

“Easy, for you, maybe. I did all the work,” Iwaizumi says.

“I know and thank you. The sweaty, straining muscles really worked for me,” he says with a smirk. “But I meant like, it wasn’t this big crazy ordeal. It wasn’t complicated.”

“It sounds like you had a bad experience and you built your idea of what sex was on that bad experience,” Iwaizumi says. “Clearly, you figured out kissing just fine. Sex is just a more complicated version of that. Learning what to do and when, what feels good and what doesn’t…”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. And really, um, thank you for this. I had a good time.”

“Good, I’m glad. Me too.”

There’s a pregnant pause.

“So was this—” Oikawa begins.

“Are you—” Iwaizumi starts at the same time.

They laugh a little awkwardly.

“You go first,” Oikawa says quickly.

Iwaizumi sighs. “I was just wondering if you were maybe interested in doing this again. Or if it was just a one-time deal,” he says quietly.

“That’s actually what I was going to ask. I mean, there’s still things I don’t know about. Iwa-chan-sama has to teach me how to give a good blowjob.”

“Hmm, that’s true. You’ve got a great mouth for it.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means I think you’d look pretty with a cock in your mouth.”

Oikawa flushes fiercely. “Iwa-chan! You can’t just say things like that!”

“Just did.”

“I can’t believe you,” Oikawa splutters.

“Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m interested if you are.”

“Yeah, I’m interested.”

“Good. Now, here’s your last rule for tonight. Rule number seven—”

“You actually counted the no sassing the guy with his dick inside you as rule six?”

“Yes. Now rule seven is this: post-sex cuddles. Very important.”

“Naturally,” Oikawa agrees.

“I call little spoon,” Iwaizumi says.

“That’s because Iwa-chan is so short!”

“No, it’s because being big spoon sucks because there’s no good place to put your other arm. Also, shut the hell up.”

“Mean, Iwa-chan!”

“You like it.”

“Yeah, maybe I do.”

Chapter Text

Seven times.

They’ve had sex seven times now.

In a little over a month.

The second time had been awkward at first, because while they had both agreed they were interested in having sex again, Iwaizumi seemed to want Oikawa to be the one to initiate, and Oikawa kept chickening out.

After nearly two weeks, though, Oikawa decided to invoke rule 5 and speak up.

“So, remember how you said you’d teach me how to give a good blowjob?” he’d blurted over dinner one night.

Iwaizumi coughed on his food but recovered quickly. “Yeah, I remember.”

“Did you maybe want to uh… follow through on that?”

“Sure.”

“Tonight, maybe?”

“Alright.”

After dinner, Iwaizumi cleared the dishes and Oikawa fretted.

He brushed his teeth, then closed the door hastily before experimentally shoving a few fingers in his mouth, trying to figure out how to approach his impending blowjob.

He had done it twice before, and he had no idea how good it had been either time, so he was assuming that it was bad, but not so terrible that his partner had felt obligated to tell him about how bad it was.

Iwaizumi knocked on the door, asking if Oikawa was alright.

“Fine! Everything is fine!”

“Are you freaking out in there? We don’t have to do anything you don’t—”

“I know, I know, Iwa-chan! But I want to, I just don’t know how! So I might be mildly… contemplating… how this is going to go…”

“Why don’t you come out of there and we’ll talk about it?” Iwaizumi suggested.

Oikawa came out of the bathroom, sheepish, but they had their talk, in low murmurs and in between kisses. Oikawa really needed to practice rule three of saying what he wanted and stop using so many awful euphemisms, but by the end of their talk, Oikawa was actually looking forward to giving this blowjob.

He was a little over eager, and had definitely watched too much porn, but he did get Iwaizumi off with just his mouth, so he’s pretty proud of himself for it.

The third, fourth, and fifth times were slow and fun, full of laughter and pleasure and followed by a much needed shower each time.

The sixth time was a quickie, just hands in the middle of the night because Oikawa couldn’t sleep, and he wouldn’t stop annoying Iwaizumi.

“Will you shut up if I get you off?” Iwaizumi had asked.

“Why don’t we find out?” Oikawa had snarked back.

(He shut up.)

And the seventh time, that had finished about thirty seconds ago and prompted this realization in Oikawa…

It had been the best by far.

They’ve started to get to know each other’s bodies, the ways to make the other tremble and gasp, the ways to giggle and follow Iwaizumi’s guidelines to good sex.

In fact, they’ve added two more rules to their list:

Rule 8: Slow and steady is better than too much too fast. (Implemented after the first blowjob attempt.)

Rule 9: No matter how much you trust your partner, use a condom until proven clean. (Implemented on the fifth time, when Oikawa tried to convince Iwaizumi that it’s supposed to feel better.

“It already feels good, dumbass. No test, no bareback.”)

This most recent time, though, the kisses had been deep and wet, the sex had been slow and soft, and the cuddles, currently in progress, were a little sticky but comfortable.

Iwaizumi is the big spoon this time, because Oikawa said it was only fair to alternate. He’s muttering something into Oikawa’s hair, but Oikawa isn’t really listening, too caught up in his thoughts.

 “Did you hear me?” he asks, licking gently at Oikawa’s jaw.

“Mm, no,” Oikawa says with a breathy laugh.

“I asked if you wanted to shower with me.”

“In a few.”

Seven times.

Was that a lot? A little? How frequently do people have sex?

And more importantly, how frequently do friends with benefits have sex?

“Is this normal?” Oikawa asks after a moment.

“Is what normal?”

“This. Us. Seven times. Maybe it’s weird that I’m counting, but we’ve had sex seven times now.”

“Have we? Okay.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Oikawa pouts, rolling over to face Iwaizumi.

“Is it normal for us to have sex seven times?” Iwaizumi asks, eyebrow raised. “I mean, I guess not. Given that we’ve been friends for literally two decades and this just started what, a month ago? Us having sex is not really the norm, no.”

“That’s not what I meant, smart ass. Are we having too much sex?”

“’Too much’ is relative. If you think it’s too much, we can slow down. If you think it’s not enough, I could be convinced to do it more often, too. The beautiful thing about sex is that you get to basically write your own rules.”

“Maybe you’re right.”

“Pretty sure I am,” Iwaizumi chuckles. “C’mon, I feel all sticky. Shower time?”

They roll out of bed and Oikawa starts the shower up while Iwaizumi gets fresh towels.

When the water is the temperature Oikawa likes it, he steps under the spray, and a moment later, Iwaizumi joins him.

They squeeze together under the water and kiss a little, hands running through hair with the double purpose of it feeling nice and helping get their hair wet.

Oikawa reaches for the body wash and soaps up Iwaizumi. He likes to tease Iwaizumi’s nipples with his slippery, soapy hands.

Iwaizumi claims this does nothing to him, but he always shivers just a tiny bit.

They’ve not had sex in the shower, but Oikawa doesn’t mind. In fact, he likes this routine the way it is. It’s intimate and sensual, and not everything has to be strictly sex.

Of course, they never showered together before they had sex, but Oikawa likes to think it’s its own thing.

It’s only been about a month, but already their friends with benefits arrangement has proven to be a positive change.

At first, they had just said they were interested in continuing this newly developing sexual relationship, and they kind of left it at that for the first three weeks.

Last week, though, Oikawa had wondered what exactly it was that they were doing.

“So like, is there a term for what we’re doing?” Oikawa had asked during their post-sex cuddle session after the fourth time.

“Pretty sure this is called Friends with Benefits,” Iwaizumi had said after a moment. “Unless you have other ideas.”

“Oh, yeah, uh, sounds good,” Oikawa had replied awkwardly. He regretted asking.

Was friends with benefits what he wanted? Was this how it was supposed to go? Is that what he even wanted?

Given the choice between continuing to have sex with Iwaizumi and going back to the way things were before, he definitely wanted to keep going.

And after all, he was initially looking for just a hookup so he could get some experience.

What’s wrong with that hookup being his best friend?

Now, in the shower, Oikawa shakes his head, putting his confusion aside for when he’s alone.

Now, he’d rather be in the moment, taking full advantage of Iwaizumi’s gentle smile, his soft, smooth skin under the hot spray of the shower, and that very, very skilled tongue.

After the shower, Oikawa is drying his hair while Iwaizumi begrudgingly folds a basket of laundry that they’ve left on the couch for too long.

In front of the mirror, Oikawa studies his face. Is it his imagination, or are his lips pinker and fuller than usual? Is it his imagination, or does knowing that it’s from kissing his best friend send a delicious shiver down his spine?

He touches his lips gently, replaying the heated kisses from earlier in his mind.

Friends with benefits is, in all honestly, exactly what they’re doing. Oikawa should be fine with that.

But there’s a little nagging feeling in the back of his mind that says he might not be content with that.

That there might be something different lurking in his chest.

Like hell he’s going to tell Iwaizumi, though, so best to just… squash those feelings down.

That seems healthy.

Yeah.

Things carry on over the next month. They have sex five more times. (Twelve in total. Yes, Oikawa is still counting.)

Something else starts happening at the end of their second month as FWBs, too.

They start just, casually kissing.

Iwaizumi’s leaving the apartment to go to work? Quick kiss goodbye.

Oikawa takes care of the dust bunnies that have been growing to alarming sizes under the bed and setting off epic sneezing fits in Iwaizumi? Quick thank you kiss.

Wake up in the morning after having slept together the night before—no sex, just sleep—and just feel happy to see the other there? Quick good morning kiss.

In between the sex, it feels like this arrangement is bleeding outside the bedroom too. Is that normal? Do friends with benefits kiss each other? Is that treading into different territory? Should they talk about it?

Oikawa thinks the answer is probably yes—he can hear Iwaizumi’s voice telling him ‘If it’s bothering you, that means it’s worth talking about. Stop comparing us to other people’—but he has no idea how to bring it up without scaring Iwaizumi off.

He figures he can sit on it a little longer. He’ll wait until he’s got a little more confidence, until he has the right words.

He’s played the conversation out in his head at least six times now, and he’s still not sure how to bring it up. Nothing he thinks of seems casual enough: it always sounds like he’s trying to get out of the arrangement or that he’s trying to declare his undying love for Iwaizumi.

Neither is what he’s going for.

But it’s kind of like they’re dating, or at least, it seems that way to Oikawa, and he doesn’t think friends with benefits do that.

FWBs don’t kiss without it being a prelude to sex.

FWBs don’t share a bed just to cuddle and then sleep.

FWBs don’t flirt over dinner at a nice restaurant, just because they wanted to treat themselves.

FWBs don’t… but Oikawa and Iwaizumi do.

When the dirty snapchats start a couple weeks later, Oikawa realizes they might really need to talk about this.

Especially when he gets his cell phone bill and he sees that he’s used nearly twice the amount of data as usual, therefore doubling his bill.

“Oh, fuck me,” he whines when he clicks on his online bill.

“Maybe later, if you’re good,” Iwaizumi says casually over his book.

Oikawa sputters indignantly. “Iwa-chan!”

“Yeah?”

They lock eyes.

“Race you to the bedroom.”

“Fuck that, let’s just do it on the couch,” Iwaizumi says with a smirk.

“Fine, but you have to go get the lube and condoms,” Oikawa shoots back.

“You mean these?” Iwaizumi asks, opening the side table’s drawer to reveal the items in question.

“You’ve got lube there? You pervert!”

“Not perverted, just prepared,” Iwaizumi reasons.

“Ugh, I hate that you’re right, and I hate that this is turning me on.”

“Hmm, that’s not very hard to do,” Iwaizumi teases. He makes an obscene gesture, imitating oral sex.

Oikawa makes a pitiful little moan and rubs his thighs together in a futile attempt to calm the spike of arousal he’s feeling.

“See?” Iwaizumi laughs.

“Mean!” Oikawa says. “Make it up to me immediately.”

“Ask me nicely,” Iwaizumi says.

“Please, Hajime.”

That seems to work, since Iwaizumi drops to his knees in front of Oikawa.

Oikawa quickly divests himself of his shorts and boxers, and Iwaizumi eases his legs apart and tugs his hips toward the edge of the couch to get a good angle.

Iwaizumi has gone down on Oikawa a few times now, and knows what Oikawa likes, what makes him tremble with want.

He also knows how to tease the shit out of Oikawa.

In a few minutes, Oikawa feels like a puddle, boneless against the couch. Iwaizumi’s lips and tongue and fingers are bringing him to the brink, but Oikawa has learned that Iwaizumi will probably not let him come just yet.

He’s right. Iwaizumi raises himself up from his knees and climbs up Oikawa’s body, pushing his shirt up out of his way as he goes, mouthing along Oikawa’s heated skin.

Iwaizumi pulls Oikawa’s shirt over his head, and quickly removes his own. He presses Oikawa into the couch, kissing him deeply, but Oikawa decides to mix things up a little, and flips their positions.

He straddles Iwaizumi triumphantly and they both need a moment to catch their breath.

Iwaizumi grinds his hips up against Oikawa, and while leading is new to him—this is all still pretty new to him—he’s learned enough that he can tease Iwaizumi right back.

He grinds back against Iwaizumi, leans over as though to kiss Iwaizumi’s lips only to pull away at the last second, leaving Iwaizumi to chase him.

Oikawa laughs, unabashedly, and teases a couple more times before Iwaizumi just grabs the back of Oikawa’s neck and forces their mouths together.

“Come here,” Iwaizumi mutters through their kiss, and Oikawa laughs and laughs.

He never knew that sex could be so light-hearted. It’s not all just dirty talk and staring into your partner’s soul: it can be silly and fun, too.

The Oikawa of three months ago would have called you an idiot for just suggesting it.

The Oikawa of today thinks it might be his favorite way to have sex.

Iwaizumi was right, after all: he spent so long building up the idea of sex in his head—what it was supposed to be, how it was supposed to feel—and then he had his disastrous first time and immediately wrote off all future encounters as terribly serious and bad.

Much as he hates being wrong, he’s relieved that he was.

When Iwaizumi starts to squirm under him, he thinks he might need to take pity on him.

“What do you want?” Oikawa asks.

“Take my pants off, let me feel you.”

“Hm, feel me how?” Oikawa teases. Steeling himself, he adds, “do you want me to ride you?”

He’s still easily embarrassed by dirty talk but he’s getting better at using his words, at least, and he knows it turns Iwaizumi on like nothing else. In the context of merciless teasing, Oikawa has learned how to rile up Iwaizumi just enough.

“Fuck, yes, please,” Iwaizumi nearly begs, grinding up against Oikawa again.

Oikawa slides off Iwaizumi’s lap to grab a condom and let him take his pants off.

He climbs back on when Iwaizumi is naked, settling on his hips and grinding there a little to relieve his own situation.

Iwaizumi, for reasons that Oikawa does not understand, really enjoys lubing them up, so he passes the bottle to Iwaizumi who gets to work fingering Oikawa a little more and stroking his own cock.

When they’re ready, Oikawa lines himself up with Iwaizumi’s dick. He sinks down slowly, but when Iwaizumi is fully inside him and they’re ready to start moving—

Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock.

A distinct pattern.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

“Come the fuck on,” Iwaizumi groans.

“Shh,” Oikawa hushes him. “If we’re quiet, they’ll just think we’re not home and they’ll leave.”

They wait, frozen, Iwaizumi still fully inside Oikawa.

“Come on fuckers,” Hanamaki’s voice floats through the door. “I can see your location on Snapchat, Oikawa, I know you’re there.”

“Plus, I texted like twenty minutes ago and you didn’t respond, so it’s time for direct action,” adds Matsukawa.

“Fuck,” Oikawa hisses.

“You didn’t turn that feature off?” Iwaizumi asks incredulously, voice low. “That’s like, one of the worst features Snapchat ever came out with.”

“You can turn it off?” Oikawa whispers back.

“Yeah, I can show you.”

As if it had somehow slipped their minds, they look down at where their bodies are joined and share a giggle.

“We should uh…” Iwaizumi says.

“Get dressed, I gotta go to the bathroom.”

“What? Don’t leave me with them! I have a boner!”

“And I have lube inside me, so you will think of Coach Irihata in a speedo and answer the door,” Oikawa whisper-shouts.

“As soon as we get rid of these hooligans I’m making you pay for this.”

“I’d like to see you try,” Oikawa says, stepping in close.

The look they share smolders, but there’s another harsh knock at the door.

Oikawa settles for kissing the tip of Iwaizumi’s nose instead and runs to the bathroom with an armful of clothes before Iwaizumi can do anything else.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming,” Iwaizumi calls to the apartment door as he gathers up enough clothing to be presentable.

“That’s what she said,” Hanamaki and Matsukawa chorus from the other side.

By the time Oikawa feels not disgusting enough to greet his friends, Hanamaki and Matsukawa have already wriggled their way past Iwaizumi and are sitting on the couch.

The same couch that Oikawa and Iwaizumi were about to fuck on, but of course neither of them is going to say that.

(Though privately, Oikawa admits that it would be hilarious to see their faces.)

“So, what brings you two chuckleheads over on a Wednesday evening?” Oikawa asks as naturally as he can.

He’s definitely trying to check if Iwaizumi is still hard.

“Well if either of you would respond to your phones,” Matsukawa says archly, “you would remember that we all agreed to go out for dinner tonight. Since we haven’t hung out in ages.”

“We’re all like, adults and stuff. No time for friends but on Wednesday evenings. Pathetic,” Hanamaki laments.

“Oh shit, that’s today?” Oikawa says.

“That’s exactly what Iwaizumi said,” Hanamaki pouts. “I don’t like this depressing hive mind you two have going on.”

I don’t like this depressing cock-blocking you two have going on, Oikawa thinks privately.

“Well, I guess I should go change into actual clothes,” he says aloud, indicating his sweatpants and ratty t-shirt.

“Yeah, and hurry your ass, because I’m hungry,” Matsukawa says.

“We’ve been trying to get you to join us for like forty minutes,” Hanamaki adds.

“Excuse you, this text is time stamped from twenty-three minutes ago,” Iwaizumi says, brandishing his phone. “So you can stop that bullshit. Give us five.”

Oikawa goes to his room to change, but sends a quick text to Iwaizumi: rain check?

Iwaizumi’s reply is nearly instant: after dinner fake a headache or something ; )

Oikawa stifles a laugh. Oh it’s like that? He replies, throws on a pair of clean-looking jeans and finds a fresh t-shirt.

The four of them head out to dinner. Hanamaki and Matsukawa insist that since they had to wait for their friends, they should pick the restaurant.

Oikawa admits that’s fair enough and doesn’t put up his usual protest.

 “Wow, Oikawa’s not gonna bitch about getting yakiniku?” Hanamaki teases.

“No, you’re right. We made you wait, you can pick tonight.”

“Who are you and what have you done with our Oikawa?” Matsukawa demands, a lazy smile blooming across his face.

“I can tolerate your protein party one night,” Oikawa grumbles.

“Protein is important,” Iwaizumi adds, making pointed eye contact with Oikawa. There’s a twinkle in his eye that Oikawa doesn’t quite like. “Good for stamina.”

There it is. Oikawa feels himself blush at the same time that he’s horrified that Iwaizumi is bringing this up.

“What do you need stamina for?” Hanamaki asks, faking innocence. “You got a hot date coming up, pretty boy?”

Matsukawa pokes at Oikawa’s face at the blush, and Oikawa swats his hand away.

“No, I do not have a hot date,” he bites.

“So why the blush?” Matsukawa insists.

“It’s nothing,” Oikawa tries again.

Iwaizumi just laughs.

“Mean, Iwa-chan! All of you are so mean. And these are my friends…” Oikawa tuts.

“You chose us, you’re stuck with us,” Hanamaki grins.  

“Can we just get dinner?” Oikawa complains.

“Fine, fine,” Matsukawa agrees. “But don’t think this conversation is over, young man. You know that anyone you date has to pass our test.”

“Are you my father?” Oikawa splutters. “Besides, I’m not dating anyone.”

Matsukawa and Hanamaki turn in unison to Iwaizumi. “Is this true?” Hanamaki asks.

“Why are you asking him?” Oikawa exclaims.

“We trust him more than you,” Matsukawa says simply.

“Rude,” Oikawa pouts.

They arrive at the restaurant and get seated, and Oikawa thinks he might be free from this line of interrogation, but Hanamaki insists.

“You’re positive he doesn’t have a secret girlfriend? Not even a booty call?”

“Guys, there’s no secret girlfriend,” Iwaizumi assures, and Oikawa is grateful that Iwaizumi can hide the smirk from his response.

Oh, yeah: Oikawa isn’t out to Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

They don’t know he’s trans, and they definitely don’t know he’s gay.

All they have to go on is the flimsy relationships he faked back in high school, and his “girlfriend” from college. (They served as each other’s beards: she needed an alias for her conservative family, and he didn’t mind keeping up appearances for himself, either. They’re still pretty good friends, actually.)

 He’s considered coming out to them as gay for a while, but honestly, without a partner, it didn’t seem worth the hassle. Why bother when he’s already been faking it his whole life? If it became relevant to his current life, he’d tell them.

Or at least, that’s what he’s been telling himself.

With all this muddling of his and Iwaizumi’s relationship, nothing really feels that safe. He’s sort of worried everything is going to come out, and he really, really doesn’t want to deal with that.

He and Iwaizumi haven’t really talked about this yet. Iwaizumi knows that Oikawa isn’t out to their other friends, and he’s not going to out him without permission. But their friends with benefits status involves Iwaizumi directly, so if he wanted to tell his friends about the action he’s getting… Well, he’ll have to be very careful not to out Oikawa in the process.

Oikawa trusts him implicitly, but he does feel a little conflicted at making Iwaizumi hide this. Iwaizumi has always been very open about his romantic interests, and that’s not what they have—it’s not, alright?—but maybe he wants to be more open about this too.

Sure, the teasing would be obnoxious, but Oikawa wishes that Iwaizumi could tell his friends if he wanted to.

Ugh, this sounds like something they have to talk about.

Despite Oikawa’s degree in Applied Linguistics, he is not very good with words, sometimes.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa seem to have bought Iwaizumi’s assurance, and Iwaizumi has turned the question back on them.

“It’s been a minute since either of you were dating. There a reason for that, or are you just too obnoxious for any girl to ever want you?” Iwaizumi taunts.

“Oi, oi, I’ll have you know that I went on a date just last week!” Matsukawa objects. “With a lovely girl—Mayumi.”

“Megumi,” Hanamaki corrects. “You told me her name was Megumi.”

“Shit, really? No, hang on, she put her number in my phone, it’s Mayumi.”

“Oh my god, you don’t even know her name? Chivalry truly is dead,” Iwaizumi deadpans.

Matsukawa finds her contact in his phone and shouts triumphantly. “Mayumi! Suck it!”

He shows the whole table his proof.

“Alright, so you know her name. What’s she like? Are you gonna see each other again?” Oikawa asks.

“Someone’s thirsty for deets,” Hanamaki teases.

“It’s because poor Oikawa doesn’t get any action,” Matsukawa adds solemnly.

I get plenty of action when you two aren’t cock-blocking me! Oikawa thinks.

“I’m perfectly happy with my situation right now, thank you very much.”

“And you, Mister Bisexual Bachelor?” Hanamaki asks, turning to Iwaizumi. “Are you ‘perfectly happy’ with your situation right now?”

“Yeah, I think I am,” he says simply.

He keeps his gaze steady on Hanamaki as he responds, but he reaches under the table and squeezes Oikawa’s thigh and Oikawa can feel himself blushing again.

Are they middle schoolers? What is this coquettish schoolyard flirting they’re doing right now?

“You’re both going to die alone,” Matsukawa says, rolling his eyes.

“No they won’t,” Hanamaki says. “They’ve got each other.”

Hanamaki laughs as if he’s shared a joke, but Oikawa feels a shiver of warmth in his chest.

Yeah, they do have each other.

Oikawa wouldn’t be mad if he never had someone else.

As long as he had Iwaizumi, he’d be just fine.

…

Oh, shit.

Dinner conversation eventually shifts away from dating life and they talk about work projects, Hanamaki’s mother’s upcoming birthday and thus his imminent trip back to Miyagi, and of course, the latest memes that have caught the group’s attention.

Oikawa tries to keep up with conversation, but considering he’s usually the one dominating it, he wouldn’t be surprised if the others notice something is off.

Iwaizumi certainly does, but at least he knows why.

Oikawa thinks he’s maybe gotten away with it – they’ve paid their bill, they’re walking back to their building—and then Matsukawa speaks up.

“You alright, Oikawa?” he asks. “You’ve been almost quiet tonight. That’s not like you. Like, at all.”

“Yeah, I kinda thought it was too easy to get a word in tonight,” Hanamaki adds. “What’s up?”

Oikawa is not about to admit to realizing his romantic feelings for his best friend slash fuckbuddy during their meal, but he’s not really sure what else he could say, until he remembers Iwaizumi’s text from earlier: fake a headache.

“I have a headache,” Oikawa grumbles. It’s not even that much of a lie, to be honest, since he’s feeling very muddled and confused.

He’s not supposed to have feelings for Iwaizumi. That’s not how this works.

His life is not a rom-com, and Iwaizumi definitely doesn’t have those feelings for him, because otherwise why would he suggest this ridiculous arrangement after all?

But then again, there’s something there, Oikawa knows there is.

The dinner dates, the cuddles, the bed sharing without sex, the kisses for no reason, the fact that Iwaizumi—Iwaizumi—has started using heart emojis in their text messages…

It has to mean something.

Which means they need to talk.

Fortunately, Hanamaki and Matsukawa buy the headache excuse, and they don’t insist on continuing the evening in their apartment, right across the hall though it may be.

(They have long ago accepted that if Oikawa isn’t feeling well, Iwaizumi will not just leave him. He will play nurse to Oikawa for the most minor of illnesses unless Oikawa asks to be left alone, which he almost never does.)

Safe behind their locked door, Oikawa and Iwaizumi breathe a collective sigh of relief.

“Do you actually have a headache?” Iwaizumi asks. “You’re not usually that good of an actor.”

“Maybe a little,” Oikawa hedges.

“Too bad to pick back up where we left off earlier?” Iwaizumi says, that irresistible smirk on his face.

Oikawa thinks about it.

If he insists on talking first, they might decide that sex is not a good idea anymore, if Iwaizumi doesn’t want to bring feelings into it.

What’s wrong with one last hurrah?

“Nah, it’s not too bad,” Oikawa says, and steps into Iwaizumi’s space to kiss him long and languorously.

 They’re still in the front hall, so Oikawa presses Iwaizumi softly against the front door.

Iwaizumi lets himself be positioned how Oikawa wants him, hands on Oikawa’s hips, tracing faintly upwards and riding up his shirt to brush against his skin.

There’s no rush, now that they know they won’t be interrupted, so they kiss for long minutes just because they can, and because it feels nice.

Eventually, Iwaizumi pushes against the wall and starts to walk them both towards Iwaizumi’s room. They break apart because it’s just not practical to walk while kissing, no matter how nice it is, but Oikawa takes Iwaizumi’s hand and leads him down the hall.

When they enter his room, they both remove their shirts and pants, an unspoken agreement and a testament to how in sync even their trysts are.

They climb onto the bed, boxer-clad, lying on their sides to face each other.

Iwaizumi smiles softly at Oikawa, and Oikawa grins back.

They resume their kissing, a little more insistently than before, and soon enough, they’re grinding their hips together in a smooth and practiced motion.

They’ve been side by side for twenty years now. Two entire decades, dedicated to each other. It’s  little dizzying to think about.

Oikawa knows in his heart that he will never have a closer or truer friend than Iwaizumi, and in this moment, he thinks desperately that this cannot be the last time he has this: kissing Iwaizumi’s throat, feeling Iwaizumi’s erection against him, hearing Iwaizumi’s heavy breathing as he gets more and more worked up, touching his bare skin wherever Oikawa wants to…

He knows they need to talk, but he’s going to tread oh so carefully.

Because he needs this side of Iwaizumi in his life, too.

He needs this intimacy, this touch, this depth of understanding and this feeling of being known.

The thought of having to start over with someone, to have to rebuild those first two decades of a relationship… he can’t stomach it. Not when he could have this.

He shakes his head lightly to clear away these thoughts as best he can; he needs to be in the moment.

He wants to see and hear and feel everything, every little reaction Iwaizumi gives him.

Iwaizumi rolls over and gets the lube and condoms out of the bedside table, putting them on the pillow above their heads for when they’re ready for them.

Oikawa reaches into Iwaizumi’s boxers, not really pulling them down, and grabs Iwaizumi’s cock.

He strokes it coyly, looking back at Iwaizumi through his eyelashes.

Iwaizumi grabs at Oikawa’s ass, getting a firm pinch in before he pulls at the waistband of his boxers to take them off.

They scramble to remove their underwear, Oikawa getting his down his legs and then flinging it across the room.

Iwaizumi maneuvers Oikawa onto his back, spreading his thighs apart with reverence. He adds a little lube to his fingers before beginning to play with Oikawa’s clit, and dipping first one, then two fingers into his slit.

Oikawa sighs, the rush of pleasure that had been building before dinner coming back full force.

Iwaizumi isn’t rushing the foreplay, but he’s not lingering, either. This suits Oikawa just fine, since he’s not looking to be teased any more, either.

He moans softly as Iwaizumi picks up his pace, and tries his best to paw at Iwaizumi’s dick, but the position isn’t ideal.

Oikawa sits up impatiently and shoves Iwaizumi down onto the bed, climbing on top.

This position is much better, Oikawa thinks, and he gives Iwaizumi’s cock a few pumps.

“You think you’re ready for me?” Iwaizumi asks, voice rough.

“Yeah, I’m ready. Give it to me, Hajime, I’m tired of waiting.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault,” Iwaizumi laughs.

“It’s your fault you’re not already in me right now,” Oikawa huffs, though he’s grateful that Iwaizumi didn’t just try to shove it straight in.

The more regular penetration has helped Oikawa get used to it, but it still feels tight and a little uncomfortable at first, so he’s glad that Iwaizumi is always gentle at the beginning, even if it gets a little rougher as they go.

Iwaizumi puts the condom on and adds a bit more lube and then Oikawa slowly sinks onto him, ready to ride Iwaizumi like they had tried before.

Oikawa takes a few deep breaths to adjust, and he can feel Iwaizumi tensed with holding still but does so anyway, waits for the okay.

“Let me start,” Oikawa says, and he slowly grinds against Iwaizumi in a little circle, just letting himself feel the full length of Iwaizumi’s dick inside him.

After a moment, he braces himself against Iwaizumi, hands on Iwaizumi’s shoulders, and lifts his hips up and brings them back down experimentally. He’s never ridden Iwaizumi, but he likes the idea of being more in control now that he’s got some experience behind him.

 He lifts and lowers himself a few more times, going a little faster each time.

Iwaizumi is gripping Oikawa’s hips like his life depends on it, and the physical reassurance feels nice.

Iwaizumi is muttering something, and even though Oikawa can’t hear what he’s saying, he blushes anyway, knowing by now that it’s something dirty.

Iwaizumi sees and smiles. “So fucking beautiful,” he tells Oikawa.

“I know you are, but what am I?” Oikawa teases back, sitting back down forcefully on Iwaizumi’s length.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you miss an opportunity to call yourself beautiful until right now,” Iwaizumi laughs.

Oikawa leans down to kiss him quick and dirty on the mouth, and while he’s bent over, Iwaizumi thrusts up into him, hard.

Oikawa moans into the kiss and after a bit of fumbling, they coordinate enough that both of them are fucking into each other.

They’re getting a little sweaty from the exertion, and it just adds to the experience, in Oikawa’s opinion.

He’s close, he’s so close. Oikawa leans back, and the angle shifts just right and with a shout, he’s coming.

Iwaizumi slows his thrusts to let Oikawa ride it out.

“Can we keep going?” Iwaizumi asks after a moment.

“I’m… holy shit, I’m done being on top. Let’s flip over,” Oikawa says, swallowing thickly.

“Sure,” Iwaizumi says, and helps Oikawa lie back comfortably. 

When they’re comfortably rearranged, Iwaizumi slowly begins to fuck into Oikawa again, building up steadily before slowing it back down, keeping either of them from going over the edge.

 Oikawa grasps at Iwaizumi’s back, short nails digging into his skin. He’s tired and a little sensitive, but at the same time it still feels amazing, so he directs Iwaizumi’s mouth to his own and lets the sensations wash over him.

They kiss open-mouthed, and it’s sloppy and hot and Oikawa can’t get enough of it.

Iwaizumi rests his forehead against Oikawa’s, thrusting slow then fast then slow again.

Iwaizumi begins murmuring in his ear—“you’re so good, so good for me, Tooru, fuck I need it, c’mon”—and Oikawa feels drunk with how badly Iwaizumi wants him.

“Hajime,” Oikawa whines. He didn’t think he’d be able to come a second time, but it’s looking more and more like he will, if he could just get a little more.

Iwaizumi picks up his pace, his hips slapping against Oikawa erratically.

“Fuck, Tooru, I’m gonna—”

He slams his hips into Oikawa hard and comes.

Oikawa touches himself to push himself over the edge, too, and they claw a little pitifully against each other for a few moments.

Iwaizumi pulls out, eventually, and tosses the condom into what Oikawa distantly hopes is in fact, the trashcan, and not just the floor.

They roll onto their sides, facing each other. The only sound is their breathing and the low hum of the ceiling fan.

“Fucking kiss me,” Oikawa says with a shy smile.

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes but leans forward and kisses Oikawa, soft and sweet, as though they hadn’t just been fucking.

When Iwaizumi starts to pull away, Oikawa wraps his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck, clinging a little longer. He presses his lips hard against Iwaizumi’s, slipping his tongue in and doing his best to not let the kiss end.

Because when it ends… they need to talk.

And Oikawa isn’t quite ready to burst that bubble just yet.

Iwaizumi breaks their lip-lock to kiss at Oikawa’s jaw and cheeks, and then he pulls back entirely to look at Oikawa.

“You’re gorgeous like this,” Iwaizumi says softly.

“Like what?”

“Your cheeks are all pink, your eyes are a little glassy, your hair is a mess”—he ruffles Oikawa’s curls and gets an indignant squeak—“and your lips are puffy. You look perfect.”

“Perfect or like I just got my brains fucked out?” Oikawa laughs.

“Both.”

“Well, I think it’s a good look for you, too,” Oikawa says shyly.

“Yeah? What’s my best post-sex feature?”

Oikawa thinks a moment. “Your forehead.”

“What? C’mon, I gave you a real compliment.”

“I’m serious! You always have your eyebrows all scrunched up, or you look like you’re trying to solve some puzzle or math problem… except after sex. Then your forehead is all smooth and you look relaxed and peaceful and happy.”

Iwaizumi’s expression shifts to one of genuine surprise.

“It’s my favorite Iwa-chan-san face,” Oikawa says, and kisses Iwaizumi’s nose quickly.

They snuggle in together, Oikawa wrapping around Iwaizumi’s waist and burrows his face into Iwaizumi’s sweaty chest.

The first time they cuddled like this, Oikawa made faces and complained about how gross it was, but now he settles in and breathes in Iwaizumi’s smell and tries to come up with the words he still hasn’t figured out.

“Y’know,” Iwaizumi says, breaking the silence. It could have been thirty seconds or thirty minutes; Oikawa has no idea.

“Hmm?”

“I was just thinking, if you had told high-school-me that one day we’d end up here, I think he would have spontaneously combusted.”

Oikawa snorts. “High-school-you would have hated this that badly?”

“Oh, come on, like you didn’t know.”

Oikawa lifts his head to try to get a read on Iwaizumi’s face, but his eyes are closed, and his expression is neutral. “Didn’t know what?” Oikawa tries.

“That I thought you were the greatest thing since sliced bread. That I would have done anything for you in a heartbeat.”

“But that doesn’t… why would us having sex be that horrible to you, then?”

Iwaizumi sighs. “It wouldn’t be horrible at all. I would have exploded from how not horrible it would’ve been.”

Oikawa’s brain short-circuits.

“I mean, I’m glad we didn’t get together back in high school,” Iwaizumi continues, seemingly unfazed. “Both of us had a lot of growing up to do, let’s say. And since you didn’t even tell me you were into guys until university, you probably weren’t thinking about it anyway.”

Oh, Oikawa had thought about it. Before he was willing to admit that he was gay, Iwaizumi had always been in the back of his mind as “if I had to pick a dude”.

And when he did finally admit to himself that he was gay, he figured it was normal to think about things like that with your best friend, especially when that best friend was insanely hot.

By the time he had come out to Iwaizumi in university, Oikawa had already forced himself through the seven stages of grief and convinced himself that it was never going to happen with Iwaizumi, and that they were really just friends, anyway.

He’s lived the last five years of his life utterly convinced that he and Iwaizumi were just not going to end up together, and that he was fine with that, because Iwaizumi was still his best friend and his roommate and he was fine with that.

Until three months ago. When this started.

Oikawa realizes it’s been too long since he said anything, and he needs to make this Not Weird fast.

“So…” he tries. Very eloquent, idiot, he berates himself.

“So I’m glad that we got our shit together a little first,” Iwaizumi says. “This whole ‘Friends with benefits’ thing has been… I dunno, eye-opening maybe. Like, I feel like I have a better understanding of what I want, now.”

“A-and what’s that?”

There’s a lead weight in Oikawa’s stomach as he waits for the response.

Iwaizumi finally opens his eyes, and sinks down to be on level with Oikawa’s face. “I want to start dating.”

Dating. Iwaizumi wants to start dating other people? Being with Oikawa has been so awful that he’s realized that he wants to date someone???

“Tooru?” Iwaizumi’s voice cuts through the fog. “Hey, talk to me.”

“No, if you want to start dating, I… I won’t hold you back. That’s fine. Yeah, fine.”

Iwaizumi laughs. He laughs. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. Let me rephrase: I want to start dating you.”

“Oh… OH.”

“Yeah, dumbass. I mean, we’re already kind of dating… Wait, are you—Is that okay with you? Like, do you want to be my boyfriend?”

“Do I want to… God, I’ve been going over like fifteen different ways to start this conversation all day. Yes, I want to be your boyfriend.”

They’re both grinning like idiots before they collide in their most uncoordinated kiss to-date.

They kiss a few minutes, a little messy but it’s good, Oikawa can’t get enough.

“Round two?” Iwaizumi teases.

Hm, round two does sound good, and maybe now that they’re official, Iwaizumi will let him leave marks on his neck, and—oh.

“Wait, wait, we uh, still need to talk,” Oikawa says, grabbing Iwaizumi’s hands to still them.

“About what?”

“This—us. I um, I mean, I’m not exactly out, not even to Hanamaki and Matsukawa, and…” he trails off.

“Oh. And you don’t want to come out still?” Iwaizumi asks gently.

The truth is, no. He doesn’t. Because aside from the inevitable teasing, he’s scared. He’s scared that finding out he’s gay will make them question other things, and even a decade of passing as a guy doesn’t reassure him.

“I’m… nervous,” he says at last.

“I can understand that,” Iwaizumi says, and hugs Oikawa close. “Coming out can be scary, even to people you know are safe.”

“It’s just… and look, I know that this isn’t entirely logical, but I’m nervous that coming out to them as gay will make them question other things.”

Iwaizumi frowns. “You mean like they’re going to somehow guess that you’re not cis?”

“Yeah. Like, if I like boys, then why didn’t I just stay a girl and be straight…”

“Well, I know that you know this, but I’m gonna say it anyway. Gender and sexual identities are separate. No one questioned my gender when I came out to them. No one who mattered, anyway.”

“People thought you were trans?” Oikawa gasps.

“No, but I got called ‘girly’ and other shit when some people found out I was into guys, too,” Iwaizumi says. “Like I said, not anyone who mattered.”

“Oh god, I can’t…”

“Hey, look at me,” Iwaizumi says, fixing Oikawa with an earnest and open gaze. “You don’t have to come out right now. You can wait. You can just come out to Hanamaki and Matsukawa and we’ll tell them not to tell anyone else. You decide.”

Oikawa swallows visibly and nods weakly.

“I am in your corner, a thousand percent,” Iwaizumi continues. “I will help you come out, if that’s what you decide to do. I… I can’t say I’d be thrilled if you said you never wanted to come out, but I want this, with you, so I can wait. I can wait as much as you need.”

Oikawa nods again.

He kisses Iwaizumi’s cheek, draw back to look him in the eye again, and kisses his lips. “I… I do want to come out. At least to Makki and Mattsun. Just. Not yet. Maybe once we’re more settled in, like, as a couple. And we know it’s gonna work and we’re serious. Maybe then, I could.”

“Okay,” Iwaizumi says. “I can agree to that. And if you want to talk it out, whatever you need to feel more comfortable with telling them, I’m here. I’m yours.”

I’m yours.

Oikawa likes the sound of that.

Chapter Text

Oikawa is sort of hoping for that whole “nothing really changed” trope after they decide that they’re a couple, and he finds that he is wrong.

Wrong, but in the very best way.

The little cloud of doubt that hung around the back of his mind whenever they would do anything that could have been construed as romantic is gone. He doesn’t have to wonder if that little cheek kiss was okay, if he was crossing a boundary, if it meant something. Now he knows that it’s okay, and that Iwaizumi wants him to do it, and that they’re together.

The comfort of knowing what they mean to each other has Oikawa feeling more at ease than he can remember being.

Iwaizumi seems more relaxed, too, like maybe he’s more at ease now that he can be open with his affections. His forehead wrinkle is still there quite frequently, but Oikawa notices its occasional absence even when they’re not post-coital. It makes Oikawa feel like he’s doing something right.

They still bicker and banter, because they’re still Oikawa and Iwaizumi and that’s one of the defining tenants of their relationship, but if the banter turns more flirtatious now, well, neither is complaining.

Oikawa had told Iwaizumi he wanted to wait until they were settled in and sure about how serious their new romantic relationship was going to be, but he finds that even after just a couple of weeks, he feels incredible settled.

Oikawa hasn’t had a real relationship before – he doesn’t count dating girls because his feelings were not actually invested – and Iwaizumi has only seriously dated one person, to Oikawa’s knowledge. So, he had anticipated some initial awkwardness or negotiation of what kind of couple they were or something.

Except he sort of forgot that they’ve been best friends for twenty years, and they’ve already gotten over the physical intimacy awkwardness some eight or nine weeks ago, so there’s not much awkwardness to get over or boundaries to negotiate.

Still, he wants something tangible to change, because he’s pretty sure that’s how starting a new relationship goes. There has been a shift, adding a romantic element and all, and it feels like something is missing.

“Hey Iwa-chan,” Oikawa says one evening at the grocery store. “You should give me a cute nickname, since we’re a couple now.”

“I don’t do nicknames, and you know that,” Iwaizumi replies. “Why can’t I just call you Tooru?”

Oikawa sputters. “So intimate!”

“That’s the point, dumbass. It’s Tooru or Shittykawa, take your pick.”

“That’s hardly a choice at all!” Oikawa complains. “But see, you do do nicknames. Just mean ones. Fine, call me Tooru. Ugh, does this mean I have to call you Hajime?”

“You did last night,” Iwaizumi says smugly.

Oikawa sticks out his tongue and crosses his arms. “I reserve the right to still call you Iwa-chan too, though.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way. Now, what else are we missing from the list? My feet hurt, and it feels like we’ve been shopping for an hour.”

They pick up the last item on their list and head to the checkout line.

When they’re back at their apartment and the groceries are unpacked, Oikawa starts on dinner, since it’s his turn. Iwaizumi keeps him company in the kitchen though, and Oikawa even gets him to chop a few vegetables for him while he handles the fish.

 “Wait,” he says, a thought occurring to him suddenly. “When’s our anniversary?”

Iwaizumi pauses in his chopping to look at Oikawa, confused. “Huh?”

“Our anniversary! You know, when we got together. Are we counting the three months we were hooking up, or are we starting from when we like, talked about it and officially called ourselves boyfriends?”

“Oh god, are you gonna be the type that makes us celebrate every tiny milestone? ‘First time we take the bus as a couple’, that kind of thing?”

“No, Iwa-chan, please. I’m just saying, when we’re, y’know, out, people will ask how long we’ve been together. Are we counting the three months?”

Iwaizumi smiles, and Oikawa is certain it’s because he had mentioned their relationship coming out of the closet. Iwaizumi hasn’t said a thing—he had promised he could wait, and he’s so far been amazing about that—but whenever Oikawa mentions a future where they’re not hiding their relationship from everyone, Iwaizumi looks incredibly happy.

“I don’t think we can really count the first three months as dating,” Iwaizumi says after a moment. “That was the whole reason we had to have that conversation, y’know?”

“But you said it was like we already were dating,” Oikawa insists.

“But we weren’t because we hadn’t talked about it. Let’s count from that conversation,” Iwaizumi says.

“Okay. So almost a month together, then?”

“Yeah. Almost a month.”

They smile at each other, and Iwaizumi can’t resist stealing a kiss from Oikawa, the skillet popping in the background.

When they pull back, Iwaizumi’s face turns serious. “But if you make us celebrate our one-month anniversary or something I’m going to hit you.”

“Abuse! Domestic abuse!” Oikawa shrieks. 

Iwaizumi wraps his arms around Oikawa’s waist from behind and nuzzles into his neck. “Hmm, is that abuse?”

Oikawa remains resolute and quiet.

He kisses Oikawa’s neck. “And this?”

Oikawa melts a little, but then the skillet pops and he stands upright. “Get back to your vegetables, you menace.”

Iwaizumi smirks, but does as he’s told.

Their one-month anniversary comes and goes, and neither insists on celebrating it other than having sex that night. It had been nearly a week since they last had sex, anyway, so it was just a convenient excuse.

Oikawa gets a text from his college ‘girlfriend’, Kumiko, that she’s back in town after meeting her girlfriend’s parents for the first time and wants to tell him all about it. Oikawa figures this is a good opportunity to tell someone about his and Iwaizumi’s relationship without having to make it about coming out, since Kumiko already knows.

He runs the idea past Iwaizumi, just to make sure it’s fine with him, and Iwaizumi is all for it.

“I think it’ll be good for you to tell someone,” he says. “I mean, she already knows you’re gay, so it’s less pressure. But also, she’s a good friend, and it’s nice to be able to talk to someone about a new relationship.”

Oikawa’s excitement to see Kumiko sinks. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly.

“Hey, no, that’s not what I meant,” Iwaizumi says. “I mean, yeah, I want to be able to talk about us with my friends, but it’s… different. I said I can wait, and I really mean it. Just means when I do have the chance to talk about us, I’m not gonna shut up for a long time.”

Iwaizumi strokes his thumb across Oikawa’s cheek and tilts his forehead down so he can kiss it.

“Tell Kumiko all about us,” he assures Oikawa. “Tell her hi from me, too.”

They meet up at a café, because Kumiko has the worst caffeine addiction Oikawa has ever seen. She’s dressed casually, in cropped sweatpants and a loose mint-green sweater. Her long hair is covered in part by a forest-green beanie, but otherwise hangs freely. She’s dyed it a sort of orangey-auburn color, probably in deference to her new office job.

(Since Oikawa has known her, Kumiko’s hair has always been a non-natural color. When they first met back in university, it had bright red stripes in it, which she had bashfully explained was an “experiment gone wrong”. Since then, Oikawa has seen it platinum blonde, hot pink, a horrible brassy yellow, and, memorably, grass green.)

They greet each other warmly, and an employee comes to take their orders promptly.

“So first,” she says, “it’s been far too long. And I feel like that’s mostly my fault, because I’ve been kind of all over the place, so I apologize.”

“Oh it’s fine, Kumiko. I’m just glad to see you now!” Oikawa smiles. “So you just met… Tatsumi’s parents? You’re still with Tatsumi, right?”

“Hah, yes, still Tatsumi. It’s kind of looking like she’s stuck with me, if you know what I mean.”

Oikawa raises a brow. “As in she’s officially stuck with you?”

Oikawa grabs at Kumiko’s hand to look for a ring, but she swats him away.

“No, no. Not yet… but we’re kind of, um. Headed that way, I think. Probably. We’ve talked about it.”

“Look at my little Kumiko, growing up. How long have you been together now? It’s gotta be over a year?”

“Just shy of two years, actually. Her parents are like, super chill with the whole dating-a-woman thing, so it was a very interesting weekend,” Kumiko laughs. “I was like, ‘wait, you’re her parents? And you want to meet her girlfriend? Sounds fake.’”

“I can imagine, given your own parents, that it would be… jarring.”

“Yeah, but obviously, Tatsumi had explained my family situation to her parents and we were all kind of on the same page. Though, I think they were a little over the top with the ‘we love and accept The Gays’, like they could somehow make up for my terrible childhood.”

“Honestly, I think that wouldn’t be so bad. I mean, you know how my parents have been, like, clueless yet reluctantly supportive. When I asked them to let me medically transition they were like ‘if this will make you happy, sure, but we are not explaining this to your grandparents’. So, I get it.”

“And when you told them you were gay?” Kumiko prompts.

“Ah, I actually… never told them that. Didn’t seem pertinent, since I’ve basically always been single.”

“Tooru, I’m crushed. Did our relationship mean nothing to you?” Kumiko laughs.

“I’m sorry, Kumiko-chan, it just wasn’t meant to be.”

They giggle.

“So, last we chatted you were lamenting your misery in trying to find a hookup. Any luck on that front?” Kumiko asks.

Oikawa blushes hard and fast.

“Oh, shit, that’s a yes,” Kumiko grins. “Tell me about him!”

“I need a promise of a judgement-free zone, Kumiko,” Oikawa says. “Because I know you’re going to give me shit.”

“I’ll do my best, just tell me!”

“So, um, you remember my best friend? Iwaizumi Haji—”

“SHUT UP,” Kumiko interrupts. “You did not hook up with your best friend!”

Oikawa lets the silence speak for him.

“Oh honey, that never ends well! Is it super weird? Are you doing okay?”

“Relax, Kumiko. It um, actually worked out. It worked out really well. We’re sort of dating now.”

“’Sort of’ dating?” she asks, a bit incredulous.

“Fine, we’re dating. We made it official about a month ago.”

Kumiko makes a high-pitched squeal. “I’m so fucking happy for you. Tell me everything. How did this not end in a dumpster fire? I need to know.”

Oikawa spends the next forty minutes explaining how he and Iwaizumi accidentally ended up hooking up, their agreement to do it again, the subsequent doing it again, and the evolution into an official romantic relationship.

She interrupts to ask questions, oohing and ahhing and tutting at appropriate times.

When he’s caught her up to the present, she just sits back and shakes her head. “I’m so happy for you but I have to say, if you two were literally anyone else… I can’t believe it worked out so well for you.”

“I know. We’re… lucky.”

“Very,” she agrees. She finishes off her coffee—her second—and props her chin on her hands. “So the whole coming out thing? Are you gonna follow through with it?”

Oikawa sighs. “I want to. I really do. At least to Makki and Mattsun, because honestly, it’s a miracle we haven’t been caught yet. Iwa-chan is so handsy.”

“Naughty, naughty.”

Oikawa shoots her a look and continues. “I just don’t know how to bring it up without it seeming like some sort of horrific betrayal of their trust or something.”

“I take it they’re straight?”

“As far as I know. Which, I mean,” Oikawa gestures to himself, “could be false. Who knows. You know we flock together, us LGBT people.”

“Well, as much as this might suck, you’re probably better off telling them sooner rather than later. Instead of ‘oh yeah we’ve been secretly dating for a year’ it’d be ‘it’s only been a month and a half’, which seems much less likely to be construed as ‘lying’ and more like ‘taking it slow’.”

“That’s probably true,” Oikawa agrees. “Yeah. I’ll talk to Iwaizumi, I guess, see what he thinks. How we should um, approach it. Or something. He’s at least out to them, already, so we know that they’re super chill with the whole ‘not straight’ thing.”

“That’s good,” Kumiko says. “Well, keep me posted, Tooru. I wish you the very best. Now, do you want to see the cat Tatsumi and I are trying to adopt?”

When Kumiko has to get going, they hug briefly as they say their goodbyes on the sidewalk in front of the café.

“It was really good to see you, Tooru,” she says, squeezing his arm. “We should do this more often. Not just unflattering snapchats, yeah?”

“I’d love to, Kumiko,” Oikawa says honestly. “Get home safe.”

“You too!” she smiles, then leans in close. “Don’t want to keep your man waiting, eh?”

“Well, don’t keep your lady waiting, either, then!” he teases right back.

Kumiko slaps him gently, then waves one last time as they part ways.

Oikawa sighs contentedly and jams his hands into his pockets for the walk home. It’s getting close enough to winter that he really should be wearing something more than a t-shirt, but Oikawa is stubborn and it’s not that cold. Yet.

He’s walking up the stairs to his apartment, looking at his Snapchats, when he nearly runs into someone.

Two someones. Blocking the landing to his floor.

“Where have you been, young man?” Matsukawa asks in a ridiculous falsetto.

“Your mother and I have been worried sick,” Hanamaki says.

“Oh my god, what is this?” Oikawa asks with an eye roll. “Will you let me into my apartment?”

“Only if you give us the deets,” Hanamaki says.

“Look, you can’t be my parents and ask for deets. It’s creepy and weird. And secondly, what deets?”

“We saw you with the girl at the café,” Matsukawa explains. He pokes Oikawa accusingly in the chest. “C’mon, share with the class. Who is she?”

Oikawa sighs heavily. “She’s a friend. My ex from college, actually. Kumiko.”

“You had a coffee date with your ex? Holy shit, did she like, have a secret child that she never told you about and now you owe child support?” Hanamaki asks excitedly.

“What kind of soap opera bullshit is that?!” Oikawa asks. “No, there is no secret child. We’re actually friends still. We text all the time. She just got back from a trip out of town and wanted to catch up. That’s literally it.”

Oikawa finally muscles past his friends and jams his key into his apartment door.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa follow him.

“So you’re just friends who used to bang and now you hug and whisper sweet nothings on public sidewalks,” Matsukawa says.

Oikawa can’t help it: he laughs, because he and Kumiko most certainly never banged.

“Yes, we hugged, and then she teased me about something. That’s normal. It’s fine. You idiots have hugged me, and we certainly aren’t dating.”

“Someone sounds defensive,” Hanamaki says.

“How’s Mayumi, Mattsun?” Oikawa asks with fake innocence.

“She’s fine, thank you for asking. We are not pretending to just be friends,” Matsukawa grins.

“I’m so happy for you,” Oikawa drawls.

“Where’s Iwaizumi, anyway?” Hanamaki says. “He’s actually who we were looking for.”

“Oh sure, I see how it is,” Oikawa teases. “Don’t care about me at all unless you can harass me about my love life. And Iwa-chan is at the gym. He’s got some crazy work thing that’s got him all stressed; said he needed to work it off.”

“You know what else helps with work stress?” Matsukawa says, waggling his eyebrows.

“Herbal tea?” Oikawa says sweetly.

“Boy needs to bone,” Matsukawa says.

Oikawa very nearly wants to tell Matsukawa that Iwaizumi is having amazing sex roughly three times a week, thank you very much, but he knows he’ll be mortified if that is how he comes out to his friends.

“Listen, sex is not the answer to everything, you… You cavemen!”

“But it’s so much fun to rile up our favorite little prude,” Hanamaki laughs.

Oikawa sputters. “I’m not a prude! I have sex!”

This statement is met with resounding silence and four incredulously raised eyebrows.

“Not that it’s any of your business,” Oikawa says, flopping down on the couch in a pout.

“What the hell did I just walk into?” Iwaizumi says, and all three of them jump at his sudden appearance.

“Well that wasn’t suspicious at all,” Iwaizumi grumbles.

“I didn’t hear you come in, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa says.

“We’re just teasing Oikawa about his lack of lady lovers,” Hanamaki says. “Very innocent stuff. Not at all suspicious.”

Iwaizumi scoffs. “Are you in middle school or something? Jesus, grow the fuck up.”

“Ouch, Iwaizumi. That’s rough,” Matsukawa says.

“Sorry,” Iwaizumi says. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m… that workout didn’t really help, now I’m just tired and stressed, instead of just regular stressed. It’s not an excuse, I just…”

Oikawa instinctively goes to Iwaizumi’s side, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and squeezing gently.

“Why don’t we watch a movie or something?” Oikawa asks, grabbing Iwaizumi’s gym bag from his hand and tossing it to the side. “Take your mind off of it for a little. I’ll even rub your back, if you want.”

“God, that sounds amazing. Let me rinse off first, though.”

And then Oikawa’s blood freezes, because Iwaizumi looks like he’s about to kiss Oikawa, and no, not in front of Hanamaki and Matsukawa, not like this, not after that conversation. But then he catches himself, passes it off as a weird cough kind of thing, rubs his eyes, and high-tails it to the bedroom.

Oikawa slowly turns back to Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

“Geez, he’s really stressed, isn’t he?” Hanamaki asks quietly.

“Yeah,” Oikawa says. “They’ve been talking about laying off a bunch of people if this project goes south, and he’s already working so hard, but… It’s hard not to worry.”

“Damn,” Matsukawa says. “Should we go home? Like would us staying for the movie be too much? He had promised to look at our game system since it started wigging out, but it can totally wait.”

Truthfully, he’s not sure if Iwaizumi would want them to stay, but he wants to be able to kiss Iwaizumi, to comfort him, to tell him things he doesn’t want Hanamaki and Matsukawa overhearing, so it’s mostly out of selfishness that he tells them to go home.

“But when he’s up for it, we should do a movie night, all four of us,” Oikawa suggests, to assuage his guilt.

 “Yeah, for sure. Let us know,” Hanamaki says.

“You know where to find us,” Matsukawa smiles.

Oikawa walks them out and watches them walk down the hall, open their own front door, and wave as they step inside.

Oikawa closes his front door, locking it, and goes to set up a movie that Iwaizumi will enjoy but not one that he’ll be too awfully invested in.

It’s a delicate balance, but Oikawa thinks he’s found something that fits the bill: a film they had both enjoyed a couple months ago, but that wasn’t so spectacular it would demand undue amounts of attention.

A few minutes later, Iwaizumi comes out, still toweling his hair, dressed in only navy-blue sweatpants.

Oikawa looks at him, his muscular upper body on full display, and sighs a little wistfully.

“Where’d Makki and Mattsun go?” he asks.

“They didn’t want to be overwhelming,” Oikawa says. “They want to do a movie night sometime, though. When you’re up for it.”

“I could’ve…”

“No, it’s fine,” Oikawa says quickly. “Tonight, just let me take care of you, okay?”

Oikawa grabs some lotion from the bathroom to use as he massages Iwaizumi’s back, neck and shoulders.

Iwaizumi groans appreciatively, and Oikawa drops little kisses on his skin wherever he can.

He whispers to him about how dedicated Iwaizumi is, how smart and hard working and deserving of good things he is, how kind and patient he is. That his efforts will pay off, the project will be a success thanks to Iwaizumi’s dedication.

The movie plays softly in the background, and slowly, Iwaizumi’s tense muscles relax, and his forehead smooths out.

Mostly.

Iwaizumi is like putty in Oikawa’s hands, and Oikawa makes sure to treat him as perfectly as he can.

Oikawa can’t give him everything, but this he can do.

Nearly a month later, the project at Iwaizumi’s work is finished, the boss is impressed, and Iwaizumi’s job is safe.

Iwaizumi invites Oikawa, Hanamaki, and Matsukawa out for drinks to celebrate, and it’s one of the best nights Oikawa has had in a long time: seeing Iwaizumi so relieved, so carefree after being stressed out for so long makes Oikawa’s heart swell.

It’s also good to be with Hanamaki and Matsukawa, listening to them get progressively drunker as they warble through karaoke, and discussing everything that comes to their minds, from politics to the chemical properties of pop rocks to arguing over how difficult making a conlang would be, and then actually constructing the beginnings of a conlang (or trying to, at least).  

Oikawa is the only one with linguistics training, so he bravely takes the lead on writing out syntax and phonetic rules, while Hanamaki and Matsukawa just yell out gibberish and say that their garbled string of sounds means “thank you very much” or “another round of drinks for my friends”.

Oikawa whines that they’re not paying any attention to their phonetic patterns, to parts of speech, or anything resembling a grammar, but he dutifully writes down their antics on a growing pile of cocktail napkins.

Iwaizumi is quieter, but not in a way that worries Oikawa. They exchange glances throughout the evening, and Iwaizumi still talks to Hanamaki and Matsukawa, but he doesn’t talk to Oikawa much.

Oikawa isn’t worried.

He’s not.

By the time they stagger back to their building around 1am (god, when did 1am start to feel so late?), they wish Hanamaki and Matsukawa a good night and get into their own apartment.

As soon as the door closes, Iwaizumi captures Oikawa’s mouth in a heated kiss.

It’s open and wet, and tastes like beer more than a little, but it’s good and Iwaizumi’s hands are everywhere.

Oikawa moans quietly into the kiss as Iwaizumi pushes his tongue into Oikawa’s mouth.

“Been wanting to do that all night,” Iwaizumi mutters through the kiss.

“Me too,” Oikawa tells him as soon as he can speak.

“Sorry if I was distant, I didn’t trust myself to talk to you without…giving us away.”

“It’s fine,” Oikawa assures him, and while it was a little disappointing earlier, he has Iwaizumi’s full attention now, so he’s determined to let go.

They walk as quickly as they can to the bedroom –technically, Iwaizumi’s, but it’s the only one that’s been used for over two months now.

They take off their shirts quickly, and Iwaizumi collapses gracelessly onto the cold sheets, giggling a little as he shivers at the relative chill.

Oikawa joins him shortly, not quite trusting himself on top and so opting to lie next to him.

“You’re so pretty,” Oikawa tells Iwaizumi. “I know people usually say I’m the pretty one, but it’s you.”

“We’re both the pretty one,” Iwaizumi says, ducking in to kiss Oikawa and missing his mouth by several inches.

He kisses Oikawa’s cheek sloppily and then laughs. “Meant to do that.”

“I’m sure you did,” Oikawa says, not believing him in the slightest.

They find each other’s mouths, and kiss long and slow. They’re too drunk to do anything else tonight, but it feels good to just be in each other’s arms, to be kissing each other.

Eventually, the kisses slow down, and they just rest their foreheads together.

Before they truly fall asleep, though, one last thought occurs to Oikawa.

“I want to tell them,” he whispers.

“Hmm?”

“I want to tell Makki and Mattsun about us,” Oikawa says. “I’m ready. I love you, and I’m ready.”

“M’love you,” Iwaizumi says in a way that tells Oikawa he didn’t really hear the rest.

Oikawa sighs fondly, and then kisses Iwaizumi’s forehead.

“We’ll talk in the morning,” Oikawa promises. “Sleep well, Hajime.”

In the morning—the late morning, mind—Oikawa wakes first, a rare occurrence.

Iwaizumi had drunk a lot more than Oikawa, so he supposed this wasn’t that bizarre, but Oikawa takes a moment to appreciate Iwaizumi’s zonked-out expression.

He looks peaceful, but he is making an undoubtedly ugly face, and there’s more than a little drool.

Oikawa carefully reaches for his phone and takes a photo of it, snapchatting it to the group chat of the four of them.

“Sleeping beaut—er, Iwa-chan” is the caption he decides on.

He goes to the bathroom and wanders back to the bedroom, slipping back into bed.

Iwaizumi stirs a little, muttering something incoherent and reaching an arm out.

When he finds Oikawa’s thigh, he grabs at it, trying to pull him close.

Oikawa’s heart melts a little, and so he complies with his sleeping boyfriend’s request.

He wishes he could get back to sleep, but he can tell he won’t.

Instead, he thinks about what he told Iwaizumi last night—that he’s ready to tell Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

How does one go about that conversation?

He knows he doesn’t want to have to sit them down and make it seem like a big formal to-do, but he also doesn’t want to come at it from such a subtle angle that they don’t get it or worse, that they think it’s a joke.

Maybe he could bring up Matsukawa’s girlfriend – were they even official, yet?—and then segue into his and Iwaizumi’s relationship that way…

“You think too loud,” Iwaizumi mutters into Oikawa’s shoulder.

“Better than not thinking at all,” Oikawa sasses back.

Iwaizumi squeezes his arms around Oikawa’s stomach. “Morning.”

“Good morning, Hajime,” Oikawa says, smiling. “Sleep alright?”

“Like a rock.”

“Had a good time last night?”

“Mm. Thank you.”

“For what?” Oikawa asks.

“For being patient with me. That whole project… I feel like I wasn’t very nice to be around.”

“Iwa-chan, don’t be silly. I’ve stuck around through worse than that. And so have you, for that matter. I’ll always be there for you, but especially when you’re struggling.”

Iwaizumi kisses the back of Oikawa’s neck, and Oikawa squirms to turn around in his arms and kiss him back.

Morning breath be damned, he is kissing his boyfriend.

“Hey, Iwa-chan? Do you remember everything from last night?” Oikawa asks.

“Think so,” Iwaizumi replies. “Something in particular you’re thinking of?”

Oikawa kisses him again. “I love you.”

“Yeah, I remember that for sure,” Iwaizumi says. “Did I manage to say it back before I passed out? Or did I dream that?”

“You kind of mumbled it,” Oikawa says with a light laugh.

“Ah. Well, allow me to be clear. Oikawa Tooru, I love you, too.”

Oikawa kisses Iwaizumi hard and hooks a leg around his hip.

Iwaizumi grinds back, grabbing Oikawa’s ass with one hand to keep him close.

The kiss is deep, and Iwaizumi’s other hand is on Oikawa’s neck, moving him to exactly where Iwaizumi wants him.

Things are turning heated quickly, and this wasn’t exactly what Oikawa had planned—he wanted to talk about coming out to their friends—but they’ve already waited over two months, so what’s the rush?

Iwaizumi’s hands are already diving under Oikawa’s waistband, and Oikawa spreads his legs to give better access.

Iwaizumi is always careful to start slow, but Oikawa wants him to move it along.

He grabs Iwaizumi’s wrist and presses it into his own crotch. “Come on, more,” he says.

Iwaizumi rolls them so that Oikawa is on his back, and he sits back on his knees to pull off Oikawa’s sleep pants and underwear.

He pushes his own underwear out of the way, midway down his thighs.

Oikawa reaches for him and pulls him back.

“Let me blow you,” Oikawa says, enjoying the way Iwaizumi’s breath catches at the openly sexual language. “I want you in my mouth, Hajime.”

“Shit, yeah, okay,” Iwaizumi manages, and lets Oikawa pull him closer so he’s basically sitting on Oikawa’s collarbones, dick right in his face.

Oikawa grips the base of Iwaizumi’s cock with one hand and directs the tip into his mouth.

He starts slow, working his lips around and moving his hand to cover the rest of Iwaizumi’s cock until he can get more of it in his mouth.

With his free hand, Oikawa guides Iwaizumi’s hips. Oikawa is effectively on his back, and it’s a weird angle to suck a dick at. Iwaizumi seems to recognize this and begins to roll his hips gently.

Oikawa looks up at Iwaizumi, whose head is tossed back in pleasure.

He pulls off Iwaizumi’s cock and says, “watch me, Hajime. Watch me suck you.”

“Fuck,” Iwaizumi says emphatically, but does as he’s told.

Iwaizumi gently fucks Oikawa’s mouth as they make eye-contact and Oikawa is so ridiculously turned on that he reaches down to touch himself, too.

After only a minute or two, Iwaizumi pulls back, breathing heavily.

“Can I fuck you? Please, let me fuck you, Tooru.”

“You sure you’re gonna last long enough to fuck me?” Oikawa teases.

“I’ll finish you off after if I don’t, c’mon, you know I will. I’ll finish you however you want.”

“I know, I know,” Oikawa laughs, and Iwaizumi scrambles for the condoms and lube.

Oikawa spreads his thighs apart, and Iwaizumi positions one of Oikawa’s legs on his own shoulder before pressing a lubed-up finger into Oikawa’s slit.

 It’s a little tight, because they haven’t had penetrative sex in a while, so Oikawa guides Iwaizumi’s hand slowly and plays with his clit to keep himself relaxed.

 They build up to two fingers, then three for a short time.

“Alright, alright,” Oikawa says as he feels his orgasm building. “Get in me.”

“So demanding,” Iwaizumi laughs. “Good thing I love you.”

“I love you too,” Oikawa says breathlessly. “Now would you please fuck me, Hajime?”

Iwaizumi puts the condom on as fast as he can and slicks himself up with the extra lube on his hand.

He sinks slowly into Oikawa and it feels a little uncomfortable and then Iwaizumi’s hand is back on Oikawa’s clit and then it’s feeling fine—more than fine, actually.

“Tell me what you need,” Iwaizumi says as he begins to pump his hips into Oikawa slowly.

“Just like that, keep it slow but deep,” Oikawa says.

Iwaizumi makes sure to sink all the way in on each thrust before pulling back sharply and returning to the slow push.

Oikawa’s breathing goes a little shaky as Iwaizumi builds on this rhythm, all the while his thumb staying firmly on Oikawa’s clit.

The breather they took to get Oikawa ready helped bring him back from the edge of his own orgasm, so he’s building up again in time with Oikawa.

Iwaizumi is saying something, but Oikawa can’t quite figure out what he’s saying. It’s the same phrase, though, repeated again and again.

It’s more articulate now, and louder and—

“Love you, I love you, I love you,” Iwaizumi pants.

Oikawa flushes suddenly, impossibly hotter and turned on. Was this some kind of weird kink he was only now discovering? Ridiculous.

He doesn’t have much time beyond that to process things, because Iwaizumi is coming hard, sighing out with the relief of it.

As soon as he’s pulled out and tossed the condom in the trash, he immediately sets to work to bring Oikawa over the edge, too, as promised. His thick fingers replace his cock, and he plays with Oikawa’s clit mercilessly.

It’s overwhelming in a way, but Oikawa thinks that in context, it’s perfect. He feels safe and loved and wanted and adored, so it’s alright if he’s a little lost.

His legs are trembling, he’s clutching at Iwaizumi as though his life depends on it, and then finally, finally he’s coming.

 When he comes back to his senses, Iwaizumi is running his hands along Oikawa’s sides and chest.

“You did so well, you always look so good when you’re coming, god, how did I get so lucky? To have this with you, to be in love with my best friend?” Iwaizumi mutters.

Oikawa smiles softly. “Probably best not to question it.”

“But if I know what it was, I can keep doing it so you stay with me forever.”

Something in Oikawa’s chest clenches at the word ‘forever’. It’s certainly not the first time he’s thought he’d be together with Iwaizumi for the rest of their lives, but with this only two-month-old relationship, it feels new and exciting.

Oikawa stretches up and kisses Iwaizumi soundly on the mouth. They kiss softly for a few moments before settling into a comfortable cuddling position: Iwaizumi resting his head on Oikawa’s chest, his arms wrapped around Oikawa’s waist and his legs intertwined with Oikawa’s.

Oikawa plays with Iwaizumi’s hair a little bit and lets them bask in the afterglow a bit.

“So, do you remember the other thing I said last night?” he asks finally.

Iwaizumi is quiet a moment before replying. “You want to tell Makki and Mattsun.”

“Yeah. I mean, assuming that’s still something you want.”

“Absolutely,” Iwaizumi says, looking up at Oikawa earnestly.

“I was thinking about it, like how to bring it up? And I don’t want to make a big deal out of it, you know?”

“Sure, I understand. Did you have any ideas?”

“I was thinking we could like, ask Mattsun about Mayumi, see if they’re official yet, and then just like, drop in that we’re official now, too.”

Iwaizumi nods. “That sounds good. Casual, but in the context of a somewhat serious conversation. I like that. Do you want to be the one to say it, or do you want me to?”

“I hadn’t really gotten that far. Do you have a preference?”

“I would be happy to tell them about my amazing boyfriend,” Iwaizumi says, giving Oikawa a squeeze. “But this is your coming out, so if you want to be the one to say it, I won’t take that from you.”

Oikawa considers it. He’s not usually shy, but about something that he’s kept secret for a very long time now, he’s definitely hesitant. It might be easier to have Iwaizumi say it, but would he regret not coming out directly and for himself?

But if Iwaizumi says it, maybe it would be treated more seriously—both because he is already out to their friends, but also because Iwaizumi is simply a more serious person, particularly about romance.

But if Oikawa says it…

Ugh.

“Let me think about it?” Oikawa says eventually.

“Of course,” Iwaizumi says. He sighs. “Shower time?”

“You mean you don’t want to spend the rest of the day sweaty and disgusting with me?”

“Hmm, I’m gonna pass on that incredibly tempting offer.”

*

Hanamaki knows something is up, he’s just not quite sure what it is. Can’t put his finger on it, if you will.

They’re finally having the promised movie night, five and a half weeks after it was originally proposed, but it’s happening, dammit.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa’s Xbox is still glitching, so they’re at Iwaizumi and Oikawa’s apartment across the hall. Hanamaki is sitting on a pile of pillows and blankets on the floor, Matsukawa is in the arm chair just behind him, and Iwaizumi and Oikawa are squashed onto one half of their generous-sized couch.

Something is going on.

It’s the little things: Oikawa called Iwaizumi “Hajime” twice last week (and Iwaizumi called Oikawa “Tooru” three times, though the third time he tried to cover it with a “Shittykawa”); Iwaizumi is more gentle, physically; Matsukawa swears he saw them holding hands in the hallway on Tuesday; and Oikawa complimented Iwaizumi’s outfit without the slightest hint of teasing.

During movie night, he has the advantage of being out of Iwaizumi and Oikawa’s line of sight, so he decides to text Matsukawa his plan.

(Yeah, he’s two feet away. But this plan requires stealth and time is of the essence.)

To: Mattsun

So what do you think is going on with those two? Something’s weird

A moment later, his phone buzzes with the reply.

From: Mattsun

Lol in the movie? Idk dude it’s probably some cheesy manufactured romantic subplot

Hanamaki sighs.

To: Mattsun

No, dumbass with Iwaizumi and Oikawa

They seem different, right?

From: Mattsun

They sure look cozy

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

To: Mattsun

Indeed

Hanamaki hatches his plan: he and Matsukawa will pretend to drink a lot – Iwaizumi had said there was a handle of rum that they were welcome to – so they’ll just make a bunch of virgin rum and cokes, and say that they’re too drunk and comfy, and can’t they please stay the night?

This is a gamble, because their apartment is literally across the hall, but they’ve managed it before.

Matsukawa is a notoriously heavy sleeper when drunk, so he’s their ticket. (If Matsukawa gets to stay, then Hanamaki can turn on the puppy dog eyes and be allowed to stay, too.)

So Hanamaki announces that he’s gonna dip into that rum after all, and Matsukawa asks for one, too, and the plan is in motion.

Six “rum” and cokes later, Matsukawa appears asleep. Hanamaki isn’t entirely certain he didn’t really fall asleep, so convincing is his sleep.

Hanamaki has been making increasingly annoying (and loud) comments during their third movie of the night, and as it comes to a close, Iwaizumi sighs.

“Damn, Matsukawa’s asleep?” he grumbles.

Oikawa mutters something that Hanamaki can’t quite hear, but he does catch “it can wait”.

Hanamaki’s eyes narrow.

Time to seal the deal, though.

“Do you know how many rum and cokes poor Mattsun had? And it’s Friday, so it was a long week, and we’re old men, oh god, we’re all going to die soon, aren’t we? We can’t even get drunk and stay out clubbing until like, four in the morning anymore, death is imminent…”

“Makki, when did you ever stay out clubbing until four in the morning?” Oikawa laughs. “You were always the first one to leave when we tried to go to a club.”

“Yeah, I don’t like clubs, but I should have the choice to not like clubs, not just, not like them because I’m old and dying.”

“And here I thought you were the dramatic one,” Iwaizumi teases Oikawa, shoving him playfully.

And yet, the shove is soft? Somehow?

Curious.

“I don’t think Mattsun’s waking up any time soon,” Oikawa says. “I’ll grab him a blanket, I guess.”

“Ooh, me too, I want a blankie, can I have the mahug… mahamongy… the dark red one?” Hanamaki says. He’s laying it on a little thick, but he’s usually dorky enough that this is probably working.

God, he hopes its working.

“Wouldn’t you rather sleep in your own bed instead of our couch? Go home, Makki,” Iwaizumi says.

“But I wanna have a sleepover! With Mattsun! And you guys!”

“Mattsun’s passed out,” Oikawa states. “And we’re not sleeping out here on the floor.”

“Oh come on, please? Just let me stay, it’s so late and I’m already here, and how will I fall asleep without hearing the dulcet sounds of Mattsun’s gentle snoring?”

“Never tell me that Tooru and I are too co-dependent again,” Iwaizumi deadpans.

There it is again! The given name thing!

“I only state facts,” Hanamaki says, trying to keep up the guise.

Come on, come on, just agree!

“I’m sleepy, let’s just… leave him. Whatever. Gnight,” Oikawa says.

Victory!

“Alright. Gnight, I guess,” Iwaizumi agrees.

Iwaizumi and Oikawa walk down the hall, bumping into each other.

Oikawa heads into the bathroom and brushes his teeth, Iwaizumi goes to his room.

Iwaizumi enters the bathroom, Oikawa leaves and goes to his room.

Hanamaki will just have to wait. For what, he’s not sure, but he’ll know it when he sees it.

An hour later, when the lights are off, the doors are closed, and Matsukawa is complaining that he really will fall asleep if he has to pretend he is for any longer, they decide it’s time.

They go down the hall to listen at the doors to see if everyone’s asleep.

Oikawa’s door is first, and when Hanamaki leans his ear against it, the door isn’t latched.

Luckily, it doesn’t squeak or anything, and Hanamaki and Matsukawa take a risk and peek inside.

Oikawa’s room is empty. The bed is made. Suspicious.

The bathroom is empty, and no one was in the kitchen or front hall.

Conclusion: Iwaizumi and Oikawa are both in Iwaizumi’s room.

They check that Iwaizumi’s door is actually latched before they press an ear to the door.

They’re… talking quietly. Then a giggle.

Then—that sounded kind of… wet? Like kissing.

Hanamaki slaps a hand over his mouth. ARE THEY KISSING?

He and Matsukawa exchange a look of wild excitement and disbelief.

He knew something was weird, but somehow this conclusion had not occurred to him?

They press their ears back to the door, eager to confirm what they’ve heard.

“Hajime, don’t, Makki and Mattsun are right outside!” Oikawa says through the door, giggling.

“Then you’ll have to be quiet,” Iwaizumi responds, voice low and dare Hanamaki say it, kind of sexy.

Conclusion: they’re totally about to get it on.

And Hanamaki and Matsukawa really don’t need to stick around for that.

They retreat back to the living room and sit on the couch, trying to process what they just observed.

“Well,” Matsukawa whispers, “we were right. Something was going on.”

“Yeah,” Hanamaki replies. “But like, why would they hide this? I mean… we’re nosy, sure, but like, they’re our best friends.”

“Well, isn’t—or maybe wasn’t—Oikawa straight? Maybe he’s having a gay panic.”

“Mattsun, come on.”

“I’m serious! Maybe this is like, Oikawa’s first big ‘oh shit I’m not straight’ moment. And they’ve been like, dancing around each other for weeks or months or fuck, years even. They’ve always been close, you know.”

“Are you implying that they have had the big homo for each other for years and are only now acting on it? Oikawa, for one, does not have that kind of impulse control.”

“True,” Matsukawa hums. “Well, I say we make ‘em face the music tomorrow. But like, in a ‘we’re your friends and safe space’ kind of way.”

“Exactly.”

The next morning, Hanamaki wakes up to the noises of someone in the kitchen – almost certainly Iwaizumi – making breakfast.

“Oh, good morning,” Iwaizumi says. His hair is messy, but he probably just woke up. It’s not sex hair, Hanamaki tells himself. Don’t think about your friend’s sex hair. Especially when it was caused by your other friend.

Weird.

“Morning,” Hanamaki coughs.

“Not too hungover, I hope?” Iwaizumi asks. Eggs sizzle in a frying pan.

“Nah, I’m alright.” He pokes at Matsukawa until a disgruntled noise comes out from under the blanket. “Oi, wake up.”

A few minutes later, and Iwaizumi is setting down three omelettes on the table.

“Not gonna make Oikawa’s breakfast too?” Matsukawa asks.

“I’ll make it when he gets up; cold eggs aren’t good.”

“Why don’t I go wake him up?” suggests Hanamaki, a shit eating grin creeping onto his face.

“No, it’s fine, just let him sleep. It’s the weekend, and you know how he gets about his beauty sleep,” Iwaizumi insists.

“But it’s breakfast! The most important meal of the day!” Hanamaki sings, and waltzes down the hallway.

He knocks on Oikawa’s door, still unlatched, and the door swings open.

Iwaizumi is looking a little pale.

“I wonder where Oikawa could be?” Hanamaki says theatrically.

“I can um, explain?” Iwaizumi says, and he looks like he’s trying to pass a brick. He absolutely knows he’s been caught, and Hanamaki couldn’t be more delighted.

Hanamaki repeats the show at the bathroom door, and then arrives at Iwaizumi’s door, and knocks twice before dramatically throwing the door open.

Sure enough, there is a mop of Oikawa-colored hair sticking out the top of the bedsheets, and an Oikawa-sized foot hanging off the side of the bed.

“Ohoho! What’s this?” Hanamaki cries out, half laughing. Matsukawa rushes over to see first-hand, too.

“Ohoho!” he parrots.

Oikawa isn’t a particularly heavy sleeper, and as intended, he wakes up at the commotion Hanamaki is causing.

He sits up, the sheets falling off his torso, and he rubs at his eyes. “Whasshappening?” he slurs drousily.

His chest is sporting two fresh-looking hickies, clearly being shown off by his shirtlessness.

“Oh shit! What are those?” Matsukawa asks, pointing.

“Is it 2015 again?” Hanamaki laughs. “But no seriously, what are those, hmm? Where did those come from?”

Oikawa seems to wake up all at once. He shrieks, pulling the blanket up over his chest. “Iwa-chan!” he whines. “How could you?”

Iwaizumi’s chair scrapes the floor as he pushes back to join the ruckus happening in his own bedroom.

“They moved too fast, I didn’t realize what was happening until there was no good explanation…”

“No, I’m talking about the marks!” Oikawa complains.

Iwaizumi’s entire demeanor shifts from bashful and apologetic to grumpy hothead in a flash.

“Hang on, what? You said I could leave marks!”

“I said where they weren’t visible!”

“Well if you wore a shirt, they wouldn’t be visible!”

“But then you let these savages come into our room while I was sleeping and helpless!”

“Our room?” Hanamaki and Matsukawa say together.

Iwaizumi and Oikawa freeze.

They look at each other.

Oikawa sighs.

“So much for the plan,” Iwaizumi says, laughing humorously.

“Oh, shit, there was a plan, Makki!” Matsukawa giggles. “What was the plan?”

“Can I get dressed, please?” Oikawa squawks indignantly.

“Yeah, come on. Out. Let Oikawa get dressed, and we’ll uh, explain.”

The three of them return to the kitchen, closing the door behind them to let Oikawa get dressed.

Iwaizumi busies himself with cooking up a fourth omelette for Oikawa, and when Oikawa emerges from the bedroom a few minutes later, a bit shamefaced, he sits silently at the table.

They eat a few bites together in awkward silence, before Hanamaki decides this is stupid.

“So how long have you two been doing the do?” he asks as casually as one can ask such a question to people you’ve known for a decade.

“Oh my god, Hanamaki,” Iwaizumi groans.

Oikawa slams his fork down on the table. “Matsukawa, how are you and Mayumi? Are you official yet?”

“Very subtle subject change,” Hanamaki mutters.

“Uh, yeah, like a week ago we decided to like, do the boyfriend-girlfriend thing,” Matsukawa replies.

“Great!” Oikawa says, with too much strain to seem sincere. “Iwa-chan and I are official, too.”

Hanamaki coughs on his omelette. “No shit?”

“That’s how I was going to bring this up, until you two so rudely interrupted my beauty sleep,” Oikawa grumbles.

“So you’re not just hooking up? You’re like. A thing?” Hanamaki asks.

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi says simply.

“For over two months,” Oikawa says proudly, and then realizes that he maybe shouldn’t be bragging about not being able to tell his close friends about this for nine solid weeks.

“Ok but to be fair, a month of that I was like, a stress-zombie,” Iwaizumi says.

“How did this even happen? Like, last we heard, Oikawa was straight and you were both single and happy about it,” Matsukawa says.

“Um… Well, the last you heard we technically weren’t together yet?” Oikawa says.

“Meaning?” Matsukawa asks, arching a brow.

“We hadn’t had the relationship talk yet,” Iwaizumi steps in, “but we were um, kind of together already.”

“That means they were boning, dude,” Hanamaki says.

“Yes! Alright, we were hooking up for like three months first,” Oikawa says. “And I’m not straight, I just… I’ve never dated a guy, and I figured why come out if there’s no one in my life? And I had had girlfriends because I thought that’s what good manly men do, they have girlfriends, so I just… kinda let people think I was straight.”

“He’s not actually out to anyone except the people in this room,” Iwaizumi says, “so mind what you say.”

“Plus Kumiko, but yeah. I’m not really out.”

“Wait, Kumiko, your ex?”

“We weren’t actually dating,” Oikawa clarifies. “I trust you’re familiar with the concept of a beard.”

Hanamaki and Matsukawa nod.

“She had uptight, homophobic parents and a girlfriend to hide, I was still trying to keep up straight appearances… it worked out.” Oikawa shrugs. “But now we’re friends, she and her girlfriend are very happy, and now I’m happy with my boyfriend, too.”

He sits up a little taller.

“Well shit, dude, I’m sorry for teasing you about girls all the time. I mean, like, I hope we didn’t make you too uncomfortable,” Hanamaki says.

“No, I wanted you to think I was straight. I was… I knew you handled Iwa-chan coming out just fine, but he’s bi and I’m not, and I worried that you would… I don’t know, treat me differently, somehow.”

“Dude, never!” Matsukawa exclaims. “Well, I mean besides we’d tease you about dudes instead of chicks, we wouldn’t treat you any differently.”

“Sometimes anxiety around coming out isn’t rational,” Iwaizumi says. “He’s not saying he actually thought you would treat him bad, it’s just… It’s a fear a lot of people have before coming out. You think you know how people will respond, but you don’t know until you do it.”

“Well, thanks for taking the leap, then,” Matsukawa says after a moment.

“Yeah, we appreciate the trust,” Hanamaki adds.

“Thanks, guys,” Oikawa says. Iwaizumi squeezes Oikawa’s hand, and they exchange a look so full of love that Hanamaki can’t look at it, it’s too … nauseatingly cute.

“But don’t think we’re not gonna tease the shit out of you for this,” Hanamaki says.

“Yeah, don’t think we didn’t notice you given-naming each other, and Iwaizumi, my dude, you’ve gotten soft,” Matsukawa grins.

“I’ll show you soft,” Iwaizumi says, and punches Matsukawa’s arm as hard as he can across the table.

“Iwa-chan, please. It’s like nine thirty in the morning; can’t we save your barbarianism for later?”

Iwaizumi kisses Oikawa square on the mouth. “Love you too, babe.”

Oikawa squawks, but kisses him back.

It looks so natural, Hanamaki can hardly believe he didn’t realize sooner.

These two have been together for most of their lives.

And by the looks of it, they’re going to be together for the rest of their lives, too.