Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Karolina is walking back from a supply run when she hears Nico’s excited chatter ringing from one of the rooms. She stops at the door, backpack on one shoulder and a paper bag filled with food clutched against her chest. The tiredness that has been creeping in Karolina’s bones slowly seeps away as she listens, caught up in Nico’s enthusiasm.

“The dude was like a body builder covered in tattoos, all glaring and angry and then Gert walked in with Old Lace—”

Karolina catches herself walking towards the sound of Nico’s voice. She stops, shakes her head, and turns the other way. Karolina walks to the kitchen and sees Alex on his new(-ish) laptop (borrowed, not stolen). Karolina almost freezes in her tracks.

“Oh, hey Karolina,” he looks up, pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, “I thought that was you I heard at the door.”

“Yep,” Karolina responds lamely. She tries to smile in return but she’s so nervous it ends up looking more like a grimace.

Alex’s expression contorts into one of worry, “Trouble?”

“Nah,” Karolina shakes her head and takes a deep breath. She feels herself becoming a little more grounded, “Nothing I couldn’t handle.” She offers him a small smile.

“Oh, well, that’s good.” Alex still looks confused. Karolina feels an all too familiar guilt gnawing at her. 

“Just leave the stuff you got on the counter and I’ll fix ‘em,” Alex offers, “I’m already here anyway.”

“No, that’s okay, I—”

“It’s cool, Karolina,” Alex waves a hand, dismissive but kind, “You’re probably tired, and anyways, you should go check up on Nico.”

Karolina doesn’t respond. She swallows but her throat feels dry. Alex gives her a look like he’s measuring her and Karolina wonders if it’s just her imagination so she tries to push her worries down.

“Are you sure?” she doesn’t stutter even though she felt breathless.

“Yeah,” Alex smiles. For a moment they just stare at each other. Karolina feels like Alex is sizing her up. She wonders if she’s the one sizing Alex up. Karolina has liked Nico for a long time— helplessly and, for a time, hopelessly. But Alex has liked Nico for a long time as well (maybe even longer than she has), and even though the choice was out of his hands (because it was in Nico’s), Karolina hated that she hurt him anyway. 

Nico chose me, Karolina thinks. Still a little out of breath, still a little in disbelief. Nevertheless, pride rumbles in her chest at the thought, stomping down the guilt that has gnawed at her heart, making her stand taller.

“Don’t keep Nico waiting,” Alex laughs softly after what felt like eternity. 

Karolina sounds as breathless as she felt when she replied, “Right.”

“Okay.”

Karolina puts the paper bag on the counter, “Thanks, Alex.”

The thanks sounds more genuine and grateful than necessary for a simple favor like arranging supplies.

“No problem.” The smile on Alex’s face is small, accepting. Karolina wonders for the nth time if there’s any meaning behind it or if she’s just overthinking it again.

Karolina’s attention is on Alex even as turns around to leave the room. She pauses by the door, out of sight, and breathes. There is a guilt, one that has attuned itself to Alex, steadily building in Karolina’s chest. She hears his fingers on the keys of his laptop, a pause, then she hears the soft scrape of his chair against the floor. Footsteps, then the rustling of the paper bag and wrappers as objects are removed, the dull thuds against the counter. A cupboard creaks as it opens. 

Karolina hears Alex sigh.

(There is more weight to that sigh than Alex will ever want to admit, out loud or to himself.)

Karolina shakes her head, releases a sigh of her own. She starts walking towards the living room. Nico’s voice becomes louder, her excitement more palpable. It draws Karolina closer.

“Until that point I’d never heard a grown-ass man scream so…”

Nico’s back is turned against the door, sitting on the floor and talking as animatedly as Karolina’s ever seen her. Molly notices Karolina entering the room and grins at her. Chase briefly looks away from Nico to glance at Karolina. Even Old Lace lifts her head up, ever so slightly, in greeting. Karolina holds a finger to her lips. Despite her earlier mood, she’s already grinning. Chase’s attention is dragged back to Nico. He nods vigorously at something she says. Gert fluidly masks the wave she’s about to send Karolina’s way by reaching out and stroking Old Lace’s head. Molly looks back towards Nico and engrosses herself back in the story.

Karolina watches for a while. In light of standing against their parents and turning their backs against everything they’d ever known (or thought they knew), they found a family in each other. Karolina moves carefully, removing the bag on her shoulder and setting it on the floor quietly. 

The rustle of Karolina’s skirts as she kneels behind Nico goes unnoticed by the goth who’s caught up in her own story. There’s a fond smile dancing on Karolina’s lips. Her arms go around Nico’s waist, Karolina tucks her chin against Nico’s shoulder. Nico doesn’t flinch, doesn’t falter in her story. She relaxes against Karolina like it’s where she has belonged all along. It’s comfortable, easy.

“I felt kind of bad after, but it was hilarious. I wish we could’ve recorded the whole thing and…”

Karolina kisses Nico on the cheek. She listens.

Chapter Text

“Chase, what the fuck happened to you?” 

Alex’s tone is so sudden, so incredulous, and so caught off-guard that it makes Gert look up from her book. She’s greeted by the sight of a very drenched, mildly confused looking Chase Stein.

“Hurricane Nico happened to me,” he flings his arms out towards Alex, sending droplets of water flying in his direction. Gert doesn’t miss the concerned look beneath his impish mirth.

Instinctively, Alex jerks his laptop away. He glares at Chase, “Very mature.”

Chase smirks, he opens his mouth to retort but Gert cuts him off before he can start another argument and they’re veered off-topic, “Hurricane Nico?” she asks.

“Yeah,” Chase turns his attention to Gert (Alex keeps his eyes trained on Chase warily). Chase tilts his head, confusion resurfacing (is he pouting?)— The expression on his face reminds Gert of a forlorn puppy. 

“She looked really pissed about something.”

“And you thought it was a good idea to approach a pissed Nico?” The image of the puppy sticks in her imagination and Gert tries to keep the amusement out of her voice. Judging from the smug expression Alex was trying to smother, however, she clearly wasn’t doing a very great job.

“It just looked like she needed to talk,” Chase answers defensively, crossing his arms in front of him. He shivers, but he doesn’t seem to be entirely conscious of the action, “And we were talking, until…”

He trails off. Gert watches as Chase’s expression contorts into one of genuine concern. (And speaking of concern, she should get Chase out of those wet clothes before he catches pneumonia.) 

“Until?” Alex prods.

“Until I mentioned Karolina,” he shakes his head in mild disbelief (cue image of puppy). “Then she blasted me with water, and just walked out on me.” (Chase notes to himself, Never bother Nico especially when she has her staff.)

“Ah,” is all that Alex manages to say. His expression shifts into something Gert can’t read. She doesn’t miss the way Alex pretends to busy himself by fixing his attention on his laptop.

“What does that mean, Wilder?” Chase’s tone is a bit more bitter than Gert expected it would sound. When Alex doesn’t respond (he doesn’t even bother looking up when Chase flicks more droplets of water in his direction).

Chase visibly deflates. “Is this about last night?”

Alex still doesn’t respond. He’s impressively convincing at looking completely engrossed by whatever it was on his laptop’s screen. Still, Gert can see how tense he’s become.

“Come’n, Wilder, say something,” Chase pushes, frowning. “Even you have to be worried about—”

“Chase,” Gert interrupts, taking her eyes off the tick in Alex’s jaw to meet Chase’s gaze meaningfully, “How about you change before you get sick?”

Chase suddenly flushes, “I, uh,” he clears his throat, embarrassed (the sound is actually enough to catch Alex’s attention, though briefly).

“You’re out of fresh clothes,” Gert deadpans. Alex almost laughs.

“I got distracted working on the Fistigons,” then he gestures, rather ridiculously, towards Gert’s general direction, “And other stuff.”

Alex actually snorts at this, earning a glare from both Gert and Chase.

“How ‘bout we try and beg Nico to poof you dry,” Gert says, placing a hand on Chase’s bicep and attempting to drag him out of the room in search of the aforementioned girl.

“No!” Chase exclaims, looking rather horrified. “The next thing I know, my ass is frozen or my hair is on fire. No,” he shakes his head, dramatically, “We steer clear of Nico for now.”

Gert sighs, “We’ll figure something out.” She shakes her head in an attempt to erase the image of forlorn puppy Chase from her mind.

“I’m sure we will,” Chase grins. His expression is innocent enough, but something about his tone belies this innocence. Gert narrows her eyes at him even as anticipation runs down her spine. Chase’s expressions turns mildly sheepish, “What?”

Gert, despite herself, smiles.

Alex shakes his head as he watches the exchange. The small smile that graces his lips vanishes when he thinks of Nico and Karolina. Alex sighs when he remembers what had happened last night. Another close call. They were usually careful so they didn’t have a lot of those, if at all. But last night they were careless. They split up, thinking they were safe. They fell for a trap instead and unfortunately, the cops that cornered them were a little trigger happy.

The bottom line was: Karolina had a habit of putting her life on the line for the team, and they (sans Nico in this context), in turn, had a habit of letting her; inevitably pissing Nico off in the process. Alex hates pissing Nico off, for more reason than being on the receiving end of her magic (Alex would still argue it’s science).

Alex remembers the look of sheer panic, the utter terror that overtook Nico. He remembers her ferocious, almost desperate determination as she tried to go back for Karolina. Nico would always fight to keep Karolina by her side, Alex realizes, accepts.

Despite her biting words (“If it was you in her place … but it’s not.”), Alex knew that Nico would at least try to do the same for the rest of them. But— Alex thinks of how broken Nico sounded despite how hard she fought to appear in control, demanding and pleading in the same breath. None of them would (could) ever cause that.

In his mind’s eye, Alex sees Nico’s shoulders falling, the quiver of her lips, the unshed tears shining in her eyes; remembers the look of defeat and resignation slowly burning through Nico’s stubborn determination. The image is vivid, and the memory evokes a sharp pain in his chest. Alex is hurting for Nico, not because of her. He’s hurting not because she chose Karolina over him, but because Karolina’s good heart and her tendency for acts of selflessness had the potential to hurt Nico. Because when all is said and done, he still loves Nico, and he loves her more than he’ll ever care to say. 

“Alex?” The two raps against the doorframe almost drowns out the soft voice that breaks his reverie. Alex looks towards the sound, feeling dazed. Karolina stands by the doorway, framed by the streaks of afternoon sunlight that filters through the window.

“Hey,” Alex hears his own voice, but it sounds distant. He feels hollow, somehow. Lost and unsure. He wonders if he would ever look at Karolina and not hurt.

“Has Nico talked to you?” Karolina is tentative. Her words come out carefully and soft like a whisper. 

Alex shakes his head, and offers instead, “Chase tried talking to her.”

Karolina winces, “I saw.” She sighs. 

Sorry about that. She doesn’t say, but Alex hears the apology anyway.

The conversation is halting and awkward. Most days, Alex is trying to be better, kinder, but he doesn’t always know how to be around her without sounding so hostile. Antagonizing Chase is easier because their entire relationship, even before Amy’s death, has always been built around bickering and grudging agreements. Trading scathing retorts (mostly receiving them, to be honest) with Nico is simpler because, well, it’s Nico; and, for the most part, Nico’s first language is snark anyway.

Karolina is a different matter. She may be at the crux of his bitterness, but that didn’t mean he found any sort of satisfaction in having her caught up in his hostility. Karolina is genuinely good in ways that most people rarely were anymore. Molly, for all her optimism and whatever innocence she still possesses, is likely the only person that Alex knows matches this genuineness.

“Karolina, can we talk?” Alex says, drawing the syllables out, his voice sounding more like his own with each word that passes through his lips. They’re already talking, but he has to ask anyway.

Karolina stiffens, senses the change in the air. She shakes the anxiousness creeping up her spine and forces herself to relax. She remains rooted in place, not wanting to cross the threshold. Thankfully, Alex doesn’t ask her to sit down. Karolina leans against the doorframe instead.

“Sure, Alex,” she answers after a beat.

“It’s about Nico,” he says like it wasn’t already obvious.

“Okay.” Alex barely hears the response. He offers her a smile that he hopes would ease her. Karolina smiles back, as she always does.

The silence that comes doesn’t last long, barely a breath long, but it felt like an eternity.

Alex has opened his can of worms, he may as well push through. If he doesn’t speak now, he won’t have the courage or the strength to do so next time. Alex is aware that this might be the only chance he’ll get, but everything he wants to say is caught up in an ungraspable storm. Words and truths are tantalizingly suspended before him; taunting him as they come close before flying out of his reach. And so, frustrated and grasping, he blurts out the only thing he was absolutely sure of—

“Nico loves you.” Alex hates the way the words taste in his mouth.

The statement, the bluntness of its delivery despite Alex’s stifled grimace, catches Karolina off-guard. She jolts against the doorframe, the edge of the wood digs into the skin of her shoulder. 

Nico loves you. He says it so casually, so surely it’s almost annoying (especially when neither she nor Nico has ever said it to each other, I love you. Not out loud anyway.). Karolina doesn’t doubt Nico cares about her or (a subtle thrill runs down her spine) that Nico wants her. She’s still entirely in awe, caught in a breathless wonder and heart-racing delight, and still entirely in disbelief. Karolina, for her part, reciprocates the caring and the wanting. The childish infatuation she once felt for Nico had transformed entirely. It had nestled itself in her chest, a wealth of warmth and love and longing.

Karolina loves Nico and—

“Nico loves you,” Alex repeats in a softer tone, rueful smile painted on his face. Then, firmly, he adds, “And I love Nico, so—”

It’s not a threat but Karolina bristles anyway. “Get to the point, Alex.”

“I love Nico,” Alex doesn’t back down, he courts the danger he sees flashing behind Karolina’s eyes. Alex continues, “I hate seeing her get hurt.”

Karolina doesn’t quite glare, but Alex feels the intensity of her gaze nevertheless, “And you think I enjoy it?”

Alex doesn’t answer, instead he says, “Imagine how losing you would destroy her.” 

“She’s not going to,” Karolina eyes narrows, her voice edged like steel, “I intend to be with her for as long as I can.”

Alex swallows, doesn’t doubt the sincerity of Karolina’s words. He pushes on, “That’s not good enough, Karolina,” he sees her raise an eyebrow, she doesn’t say anything so he continues, “You’re selfless and you’re reckless. That’s never a good combination.”

Alex waits for Karolina to respond, to tell him that he had let her be reckless. He waits for Karolina to tell him how he’d willingly left her to get to safety. Karolina doesn’t say anything and Alex can see her grinding her teeth. He softens, his shoulders sag (more with guilt than anything else), he tells her, “As long as you can may not be long enough for Nico.”

Karolina startles, her eyes widen and her lips part as though she would speak only for silence to come instead. Alex relishes this second look of surprise he’s elicited from her.

“Are you asking me to walk away from her, Alex?” This time, Karolina does glare. Frustration and indignation is evident in the quiet tremble of her voice, “What, so you can sweep in?” Her tone becomes harder, more determined, “Because I’m not going to. You can’t threaten me or guilt-trip me into—”

“No, that’s not what I’m trying to do,” he cuts her off, voice weary, “I’m not trying to pick a fight with you, Kar. That wasn’t— I was— fuck.” Alex sighs gruffly, breathes. He shifts gears, “I couldn’t do anything to save Amy and,” the words get caught in his throat, “And, afterwards, I didn’t do anything for Nico I—”

“I know,” Karolina is quiet again, her voice carries with strength but she no longer sounds angry. “I was there. I tried,” she stutters, “I tried to be there for Nico, but—” a pained and sardonic smile flitters briefly on her lips, “Eventually, I got pushed away and,” Karolina averts her gaze, eyes darkening with regret, “I let myself be pushed away.”

This time, it’s Alex who’s caught off-guard. And then, rather bitterly, he supposes he’d never stood a chance against Karolina after all. He had hurt Nico trying to drown himself in his own guilt. The rift (which he’d  been the one to carve) between him and Nico was immense (and Karolina had managed to carve a spot beside Nico where he would never reach).

Alex smiles, tired and sad, “You did more than I ever bothered to.”

Silence. A sigh. Alex pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, speaks—

“I want to make up for never doing anything.” For never saying anything, Alex thinks to himself. Karolina remains silent, nods ever so slightly, and waits for him to continue.

“Our lives aren’t simple or safe,” his voice is soft in its prostration, Karolina almost has to strain to hear him, “But I want to make it safe enough so Nico doesn’t ever have to be scared that she’s lost you too.”

 The night has settled into a peaceful calm when Karolina finds herself standing in front of the door to her bedroom. Well, her’s and Nico’s. And she feels anything but calm. Her heart is hammering in her chest and she feels like bolting (but to where? Her room is just behind the closed door). 

Nowhere but forward.

Karolina pauses, a slight frown on her face. She shakes her father’s voice from her head. Nowhere but forward. It was a catchphrase from one of his movies. It had quite a number of sequels she used to hear it a lot when he was at home and practicing his lines. Or when Karolina would have a little stumble and he’d urge her on,  grinning, Nowhere but forward. (Karolina tries not to think about him most days. It still hurt to think that he’d also betrayed her. That he’d put her and her friends’ life at risk. She tries to understand him, or pretends she does. Maybe he thought he was doing it for the right reason, maybe— She stops. This is why she doesn’t want to think of him most days, it would drive her crazy if she did. But that’s most days, for now, for now, she would listen to his words.)

It doesn’t fill her with a lot of courage (at least, not as much as it used to, she doesn’t think it ever will) but it’s enough to get her to knock. Two and a half of the jerkiest, most awkward sounding knocks. She sighs and steels herself.

Inside the bedroom, Nico is on the bed with a book. She hears the knock but she doesn’t move. She fights the urge to even glance at the door as she tries to keep her focus on the book (the Iliad is weirdly fascinating). After a rather long pause, the door finally opens. Nico fights the urge to frown or flinch. Her expression remains deceptively neutral, eyes glued to the pages of her book, but only barely. 

When the door finally swings open, Karolina remains glued on the spot. Nico doesn’t acknowledge her presence (or she does, if the barely noticeable frown on her face was any indication). Karolina opens her mouth, attempts to say something, stops. Rooted on the spot, she stares. Nowhere but forward, she tells herself, but her feet doesn’t want to obey.

The silence is taut with awkwardness. The tension in the air so palpable that both girls can feel it grating against their skin. Karolina tries to say something again, but Nico beats her to it.

“This is your room too, Karolina,” her voice is somewhere between a growl and a whisper. She sounds annoyed, but Karolina could hear the anxious tremor in her voice, “Just get in and close the door.” Nico doesn’t take away her eyes from the book in her hands. She’s now openly scowling at the pages.

Karolina doesn’t move at first. This time she doesn’t really feel like she’s stuck on the spot, just stubborn. She wants Nico to look at her instead of whatever she’s reading. The page turns. Karolina waits too long.

“Well?” Nico asks through gritted teeth, brows furrowed and eyes still trained on the Iliad.

Karolina finally relents. She enters with a sigh, pushes the door closed. She stops again, just stands there, observing. Karolina’s expression softens when she sees how rigid Nico’s posture is and the white-knuckled grip she had on the book’s cover (The Iliad, Karolina notes with some interest), good thing the book was hardbound. The book couldn’t be that interesting, could it? They needed to talk and—

“Nico,” Karolina finally says, almost begging, sadness and trepidation making her voice waver.

This time, Nico flinches. She doesn’t say anything, still doesn’t look up.

Karolina sighs again. When she speaks, her words are heavy with resignation, “Look, I know I’m not your favorite person right now—”

She doesn’t get to finish the statement. “You are.” Nico interrupts, feeling the need to assure her girlfriend (she swallows, there’s a flutter in her chest that she’s trying to ignore, because she’s supposed to be mad but her insides are turning into mush). Nico looks at Karolina, finally, her stare is intense. 

Karolina loses track of whatever she was going to say, “What?”

“You’re still my favorite person, K.” Nico’s expression turns gentle. She offers a small smile, not quite We’re okay, but somehow Karolina knew they would be.

“I am?” She chokes on the question.

“Always,” Nico’s smile widens imperceptibly. She finally puts the book down, Karolina finally moves. She stops close to the edge of the bed, Nico’s side. Then, Nico averts her gaze again, she glances sidewards, stares pointedly at the book’s cover, “Did you know that Achilles wanted to go home?”

“What?”

“Achilles. Trojan War. Killed Hector. The Iliad. Ring any bells?” At least her confusion drags Nico’s gaze back to her, eyebrow raised and all.

“No,” Karolina says at first, then “Yes. I know the story. What—”

“He wanted to go home,” Nico repeats, as if it explained everything.

“Okay?” Karolina replies, her answer trailing into a question.

“After Agamemnon takes Briseis from him, Achilles removes himself from the battlefield,” Nico narrates. Her tone is unreadable. She sounded, as far as anybody was concerned, like they were two normal teenagers talking about a reading for school “He started preparing for a voyage home.”

“I know,” Karolina says, because she does know what happens in the epic. She’s read the Iliad before, for class. “But what—”

“It’s funny,” Nico cuts her off, “Because all this time I thought Achilles was just some petty, vengeful, angry dickhead.” There’s a wry smile on Nico’s face and something akin to dawning realization. Karolina is still confused, but Nico continues, “I used to think he was a monster for going as far as he did, dragging Hector’s corpse in front of his people.”

“Nico…” Karolina trails off, not really knowing what to say, she sounded tired but willing to listen.

“In my defense, I only saw that movie with Brad Pitt,” Nico is sheepish and incredulous when she says this. She picks up the book, “And it was far off from this.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“I think I’m beginning to understand Achilles,” Nico says by way of explaining, as though Karolina hadn’t just ask her a question. “You know what else?” Nico asks, wry smile back in place, “I think Achilles had wanted to leave that war way before Agamemnon offended him. Briseis was just the final straw,” Nico pauses, contemplative, then continues in a mock voice which Karolina assumed was Achilles’s, “‘What’s the point of toiling in war day in and day out,’ he asked, ‘because it’s the same for the person who fights hard and the person who just hangs back anyway.’” Nico’s tone and expression becomes more serious, “They all die.”

Karolina bites the inside of her cheeks. She doesn’t say anything and Nico is clearly not done. She listens, heart clenching at the distress hidden behind Nico’s words.

“Did you know he was adamant about going home, Karolina?” The question is like a punch to gut or a knife twisting in her chest, it hurt. “He’s all, ‘I want glory!’ But then he also says he doesn’t care if he loses his honor for quitting the war and sailing home.” Nico laughs, incredulous and angry, “He knew about the prophecy, right? Because his mother told him. He stays, he dies. He leaves, he gets to live a long life. So he chose to go home and he didn’t want to be persuaded to stay.”

Karolina remains silent, hating that she doesn’t know what to say.

“Do you know what happens?” Nico’s voice is quiet again, she sounded like a little kid, lost and scared.

“No,” Karolina answers, even though she knew. “Tell me.”

“Patroclus—” Nico suddenly cuts herself off, “By the way, not Achilles’s cousin.” She scoffs and rolls her eyes, “Honestly, that movie was a lie.”

On a normal day, Karolina would smile teasingly at Nico and say something like, I know, Nico. I’ve read the book. We had it for English lit, remember? Nico might say something like, You read it, I watched the movie. Not everyone is good and responsible like you, K. But it’s not a normal day. And even if Nico’s talking to her now, she knows they’re still “fighting.” And, anyways, even if they weren’t, Nico had that fire in her eyes that told Karolina not to interrupt. The present moment had a gravity to it that Karolina couldn’t quite yet place but was already tugging at her mind.

“Anyway,” Nico continues, “Patroclus approaches him. And Patroclus was selfless and compassionate and it hurt him to see their allies suffering badly at the hands of the Trojans without Achilles and his forces. So, he goes to Achilles, and he’s mad. He practically curses Achilles, mocks him. ‘Damn you for being so petty and stubborn. You’re so strong and brave and glorious but what’s the point if you don’t help our men even when you see them dying?’”

The tone she uses for Patroclus is bitter and furious. Karolina can feel the weight of those words pressing down on her as Alex words from earlier echoes in her head. You’re selfless and you’re reckless. That’s never a good combination.

“But then, you know, Patroclus is Patroclus. Ever so nice and caring. So he tells Achilles, ‘If you’re scared because of some prophecy of your death, then at least let me fight. Let me wear your armor, let me lead your men. Let me fight in your place so maybe I could scare the Trojan’s into thinking I’m you. Maybe I could give our allies hope, give them some breathing space so they can push back.’” Nico sounds subdued by the end of it, still bitter, still annoyed, but more tired.

Karolina aches with the desire to sweep Nico into her arms and whisper sweet nothings to her. She doesn’t. She barely twitches, holds her breath. Karolina is afraid of shattering the moment.

“And it’s so stupid,” Nico’s voice breaks, she grits her teeth and continues, no longer looking at Karolina, “Because Patroclus is so fucking compassionate and unselfish that he practically begs Achilles to send him to his death. And you know what’s even dumber?” If Nico’s voice wasn’t angry, the question would have come out as a snarl. Instead it’s a whisper, harsh and raw, and Karolina feels the impact of it gnawing in her chest.

When Nico doesn’t continue speaking immediately, Karolina realizes Nico is waiting for an answer, “What?” She barely manages to force the question out.

“That Achilles lets him,” Nico is breathless, but the frustration makes her voice louder, “I mean, he didn’t just know Patroclus could die, he knew that he would. Because that was the prophecy,” Her tone shifts to incredulity again, laced with irritation, “And it’s really fucking stupid because Achilles would probably give in to Patroclus anyway. No matter what. Because he knows he can’t deny his dumb friend’s big heart. Because he knows Patroclus probably would’ve risked himself anyway even if he begged him not to, and it’s, just, so fucking annoying,” Nico spits the words out haltingly and through gritted teeth, glaring and pleading at the same time. Karolina flinches.

“And then Patroclus gets killed,” Nico stops, swallows, looks away, “And finally Achilles decides to fight,” a sullen smile finds its way on her lips, she continues, “Everyone thinks it’s because he’s really mad at Hector and wants to avenge Patroclus, and he probably was, but that can’t be the only reason. You know what I think?” Nico meets Karolina’s gaze again.

Karolina shakes her head quietly, voice lodged in her throat.

“I think Achilles was more angry at himself,” Nico’s expression turns sad, infinitely sadder, “I think Patroclus’s words probably haunted him. What was the point of being so powerful when he couldn’t even protect his people, his best friend?” There’s a pause, “Homer called Patroclus someone Achilles loved above all other men and as much as his own life. And that was the person that he couldn’t save.” There is a desperation behind Nico’s dark eyes, now shining with tears, and it begs to be understood, “Achilles went into that fight not really giving a shit about Agamemnon’s up-sized gifts. ‘Just let me fight,’ he says. Going home and living a long life be damned. He doesn’t care whether or not he dies. Because he’s already dead anyway. He’s already lost Patroclus.”

Karolina feels the pain in those words as clearly as if they were her own. Nico feels like an extension of her a soul, a half of her heart, so Nico’s pain might as well be hers. It twists in her heart and churns in her guts. Karolina is kneeling by Nico’s (their) bedside. Nico is crying. Her tears fall down her cheeks unabashedly, she does nothing to stop them or wipe them away. The pause is long enough to last forever. Nico and Karolina’s hands are clasped together tightly. Karolina realizes she’s crying too.

Finally, Nico speaks again, “You know what I think?”

“Tell me.”

“I don’t think it was Achilles’s quest for honor or glory or whatever that doomed him,” Nico offers a shaky smile before her expression darkens again, “I think it was his love for Patroclus,” She pauses, the words are heavy with meaning. She looks at Karolina, who nods, I understand. 

Nico sighs, continues, “At the end of the day, Achilles was cruel. Dragging and parading someone’s corpse in front of his loved ones after you’ve just murdered him is horrible and inexcusable. But, I get it, in a way. Going mad the way he did, the pain he must have felt after losing the person he loved. It’s terrifying because—” She chokes on the words. Her hand squeezes Karolina’s tightly it nearly hurt.

“Because,” Nico tries again, “Because I don’t really want to think about losing you.”

Karolina shakes her head, bows and kisses Nico’s hands, her eyes shut tight futilely against her tears. Something that Alex had said earlier, before they parted, echoes in her head. If you die, it would kill Nico. Or maybe Nico would die trying to protect you. Your life is not just your own anymore. Take care of yourself, Karolina.

Karolina disentangles their hands long enough so she could get in bed and wrap her arms around Nico. She kisses Nico on her temple, I love you, then on her cheek, I love you, and finally on her lips, I love you. They stay like this for a while, arms wrapped around each other, tears falling. The silence that stretches between them is punctuated by their sobs, but it’s not uncomfortable.

After a moment’s eternity, Karolina speaks.

“Hey, Nico?” She whispers shakily against the other girl’s temple, “You know I’m here to stay, right?”

“Are you?” It’s teasing not accusatory. Karolina smiles. We’re going to be okay.

“I am,” She confirms, nodding sagely. She tries to keep her tone light and teasing, but she can’t help the somberness and the fear that pervades it, “Until you don’t want me anymore.”

“Never,” Nico shakes her head. She presses closer to Karolina.

“Then you have me forever.”

Chapter Text

Nico is used to nightmares. 

Sometimes the memory of the nightmare is fresh in her mind, chasing her in her waking consciousness. Other times, she would wake up, nightmare forgotten, but her heart would be hammering in her chest, hard and fast enough to ache. She would be shaking and breathless and sweaty. And utterly fucking terrified. 

Today is different. When Nico is jostled awake by the monsters in her dreams, she finds herself waking in the calming presence of Karolina rather than the cold and lonely darkness of her room. Somewhere in the night they had turned, facing each other, Nico tucked perfectly into Karolina, arms wrapped around each other. Nico finds herself bathed in this tender sense of belonging. She’s happy. And utterly in love. Nico nuzzles closer to Karolina, careful not to wake the other girl up, she breathes in sweetness and starlight. Karolina smells faintly of the city and detergent, and something else that reminds Nico of raspberries. She sighs, contented.

Nico closes her eyes again, not in attempt to fall asleep but just to revel in the moment. However, with their part of the world still enfolded in quiescence and the sun still hours away from coloring the sky with its rays, sleep reclaims Nico into its arms. Her nightmare is replaced by a sweeter dream, one that invokes memories of Karolina’s fingers tracing her skin, of her lips pressed against the inside of her thigh, and her voice raspy with desire. The dream is vivid, a terrifyingly encompassing verisimilitude that jolts Nico back into wakefulness just as her body is about to explode in pleasure.

It’s disconcerting and entirely too frustrating. Suddenly, Nico is very widely awake, chest heaving and blood rushing to her ears. She’s aware that she’s trembling. She can feel almost as much as she can hear the way her heart is thundering against her ribs. Later, when Nico is inwardly debating on the pros and cons of untangling herself form her girlfriend’s arms and sneaking off into the bathroom, Karolina shifts. Realizing that she’s waking up, Nico tries to keep as still as possible, to even out her breathing, and pretend that she’s asleep. It was hard to focus on the ruse because Nico was much too acutely aware of the way Karolina’s body arched against her as she stretched.

Unseen to Nico is the small smile that graced Karolina’s lips. She looks at Nico’s form fondly, relishing the weight of the other girl in her arms. Karolina knows Nico well enough to know she was awake. “Hey,” Karolina mumbles sleepily, voice beautifully husky, “Did you have another nightmare?”

Nico doesn’t answer. Fuck. She can feel every syllable as Karolina spoke, feel her gaze as surely as a gentle caress. Nico is far too painfully aware of the heat radiating from Karolina's skin to be comfortable, feels the heat seeping through their clothes like the beginning of a wildfire. She swallows, throat suddenly feeling dry.

“Nico?” The concern was honestly touching but Karolina’s voice was distracting her. It wasn’t fair that dream-Karolina’s sex voice sounded so much like real-Karolina’s sleepy voice— especially when the dream was currently replaying in her brain.

“Nope,” Nico finally croaks, muffling her response against Karolina’s shoulder, “It wasn’t a bad dream.”

The only nightmare at that moment was how inappropriately turned on she was. Karolina chuckles like she knew exactly what Nico had been dreaming about. Nico feels the vibrations of her laughter crawling against her skin, turning into delightful goosebumps. She shivers and tries to squirm away.

“No,” Karolina whines, complaint drawn out adorably. Her arms tighten around the smaller girl. Nico manages to successfully extracts herself from Karolina anyway, though not entirely. One of Karolina’s arms is still lazily draped on her waist. Nico takes in the sight of Karolina in the moonlight: with her heavy-lidded gaze and her lazy but fond grin, and the way her hair falls in gentle waves. The way the blue of her eyes put the best of the morning skies to shame. Even at this hour, with most of the city still sleeping, in the quiet of their room, Karolina is radiating her unmistakeable brand of strength and grace. She is captivating and Nico is in love with her. Loves her, plain and simply.

Nico reaches out, fingers brushing against Karolina’s cheeks meekly. She pushes some strands of blonde hair away from Karolina’s face. Nico hand ends up resting against her cheeks. Karolina raises her head slightly, and leans into the warmth of Nico’s hand. They look at each other affectionately.

For a moment, Nico simply admires Karolina. You’re strong and beautiful, and I love you. Then she leans in and presses a kiss against Karolina’s lips. It’s gentle at first, prodding next, then deeper and more languid. Nico feels Karolina smiling into the kiss. She smiles too.

When they pull apart, Karolina grins mischievously at Nico, “Would you like to tell me about that dream?”

Nico licks her lips, beginning to smirk. She disentangles herself completely from Karolina, only to straddle the taller girl. “I think I’d rather show you.”

Chapter Text

With magic you could never be bored. At least, that’s what Nico thought. 

She was wrong. 

Okay, no. 

Technically, she wasn’t wrong? 

Magic was fun, it’s just that the gang is supposed to be lying low, being inconspicuous, unseen, blending in, keeping their heads low, [insert other synonyms here], and all that jazz. No flashy science-ing, Nico. At the sound of Alex’s voice echoing in her head—an irritating blend of cautious, taunting and sensible—Nico blanches. First of all, it’s magic not science. Maybe Alex, her mom, or whoever else wanted to call it science, and maybe it was also sort of science, but she was going to call it magic.

Second of all, not flashy wasn’t fun especially when Nico wanted to be as melodramatic as possible.

(Side note: The tiny-ish explosion from two days ago was not her fault. It definitely wasn't because Chase dared her to tamper with the wiring of an annoying neighbor's car from the safety of their safe house.

The good ol' days.)

“I’m bored,” Nico grumbles to no one in particular. She’s lying on the floor, flat on her back, staring at the particularly boring ceiling.

“We’re all bored.” Even without looking at him, Nico can feel Chase rolling his eyes.

“You’re bored?” She shoots Chase a meaningful glance, eyebrows waggling, his face was at least more interesting than the off-white paint job she’s been staring at for the past couple of minutes, “I thought you were keeping your hands busy.”

“Me?” he asks, hand on his chest, one eyebrow raised, smirk dawning on his lips “I thought that was you, Nico.”

Before Nico can respond, Alex chimes in, “I’ve watched the same cat video for the thirty-seventh time.”

There’s a slight pause in the flow of their conversation. A tiny nudge of awkwardness that makes Nico purse her lips. She and Chase stare at each other for what felt like an eternity until finally, he says—

“Thirty seven’s not an impressive number, Alex,” Chase gets off the couch to walk towards the table where Alex set camp. “You should see what people do with Vines.”

“I can’t,” Alex deadpans, he doesn’t take his eyes off the screen, “Vines are dead.”

The response elicits a very, overly dramatic gasp from Chase, “I didn’t raise you to be this way.”

“You didn’t raise me at all!” Alex suddenly explodes, cat video forgotten. He jumps out of his chair, whips around and faces Chase.

Nico drags herself to a sitting position. Okay, what the fuck?

It’s like watching the cheesiest stand off in the worst Western movie in history.

“You’re right!” Chase shouts back, aggressively pointing at Alex and totally in character, “You were adopted!”

“I always knew you were too white to be my mother!”

Chase gasps dramatically. Hand to chest. Alex has his hands on his hips, staring down his now-adoptive-mother Chase. Nico doesn’t know if she wants to laugh or quietly slink away from the room. This was weird, even for her, and that’s taking into account she can actually do magic, her girlfriend is an actual rainbow, and they have a dinosaur for a pet. Nico wonders if she was hallucinating or if she was that brain-dead bored she accidentally conjured this weird-assed vision of Chase and Alex.

Nico hears footsteps walking towards the living room. Well, at least that might confirm her am-I-hallucinating-or-is-this-real dilemma.

“Are they okay?” Karolina stops abruptly, just before the entry way. She’s staring at the Alex and Chase, clearly gauging if the fight is serious. Okay, definitely not a hallucination.

“Nope,” Nico’s gaze flickers towards Karolina, she shrugs lazily. A tiny smile finds its way to her lips.

Before Karolina can even ask, Gert interrupts coming at the heels of Karolina, “The better question is: Is Old Lace okay?”

Karolina rolls her eyes, a grin on her face. She makes way for Gert, Old Lace, and Molly to enter the room. Nico looks at Karolina in askance but this time it’s her girlfriend who shrugs. Molly heads over to the table and pulls out a chair. Karolina remains at the doorway, leaning against the frame and watching the scene in front of her. Old Lace rests on the floor beside the couch where Gert just threw herself on. 

It got weirdly quiet. Like Alex and Chase were stuck in their own weird movie and everyone else was waiting for Nico to respond.

“Uh,” after a beat, Nico tears her eyes away from her Karolina, watching Gert throw herself on the couch. “What happened to Old Lace?” she asks.

“Uhm…” It’s Molly who answers, sheepish and a touch pleased, “I kind of… got into a wrestling match with her?”

Chase and Alex are surprisingly unbothered. They have begun circling each other.

“Are you supposed to be wrestling with a dinosaur?” Nico frowns, mostly distracted by Chase and Alex circling each other like frat boys in a playground.

It’s Gert who speaks up, “I think what you meant was: Was Old Lace supposed to be wrestling the kid who can bench press a truck?” Old Lace, for her part, lets out a snort. Her head moves from side to side, as if shaking her head.

“Are you okay, Molly?” Nico asks, completely unsure, because Gert wasn’t wrong about the truck thing. But Old Lace is still a dinosaur. But still…

“Molly’s totally fine,” Gert waves a hand, she reaches out and pets Old Lace, “Old Lace got the worst of it, din’t’cha, girl?”

Old Lace throws her head back and groans dramatically, as if to agree.

“See.” 

Nico does not see.

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic,” Molly says. Nico doesn’t know if it was directed to Gert or to Old lace. “We were just playing.”

“Most kids don’t play with dinosaurs, Molly,” and before anybody can point out the obvious, Nico adds, “Not real ones anyway.”

“Most kids don’t have real dinosaurs,” Molly points out. Karolina steps away from the door way and moves to sit beside Nico.

“Most kids don’t have super smart bioengineer parents who created a dinosaur with an empathic bond with their daughter as a failsafe if joining an evil cult blows up in their faces,” Gert delivers the whole thing with a bright smile. Old Lace is nodding beside her.

“Most kids have dogs,” it’s Karolina who says this. Nico throws her an incredulous look. Karolina just grins impishly right back at her (which would have been annoying if she wasn’t so cute). Karolina throws an arm around Nico, pulling her in for a quick peck on the lips. 

“Don’t act cute with me,” Nico pokes Karolina on her side.

“Bold of you to assume I’m not always cute.”

True, Nico thinks. But she doesn’t say it out loud. Instead she wraps an arm around Karolina’s waist and snuggles closer.

“Hey,” and just like that, Nico’s attention is back to Gert, “Old Lace is a puppy. Look at her.”

Nico looks. Old Lace is… grinning at her? Suddenly, she’s wondering why a dinosaur bearing her rows of dangerously sharp teeth looked cute. “She looks like a dinosaur with very sharp teeth,” Nico manages to deadpan.

“She’s harmless.”

Old Lace whines dramatically before rolling over, tongue lolling out.

“Until you piss Gert off,” Molly mutters.

Nico can feel the last threads of sanity slipping away. At that moment, Chase chooses to shout— 

“You are grounded, young man! No more cat videos for you!”

“You can’t tell me what to do!”

How are they even still in character?

“I can and I will,” Chase suddenly lunges for Alex’s laptop. He actually manages to get it. “From now on you can only watch Vine compilations!”

“Nooooooooo!!!!”

“Hey, OL, wanna play fetch with Alex’s laptop?” Chase asks an evil grin plastered on his face.

Alex breaks character, “Chase, don’t you dare.”

Old Lace is up on her feet, butt wagging excitedly. She and Chase stare at each other for a beat. And then suddenly Chase is bolting out the door, laptop in hand, Old Lace on his heels.

“Molly, come on, you gotta help me wrangle, Chase,” Alex looks stunned for a moment, then he’s running after them, Molly following after him, confused.

“Don’t you mean Old Lace?”

Even though they’re out the door, running off to goddesses know where, Nico still hears Alex’s response, “No, I definitely meant Chase. I am going to—”

"Old Lace does have impeccable manners," supplies Gert to no one in particular. She doesn't make a move to get out of the bed.

There’s a crash somewhere in the house.

Nico looks at Gert, “Aren’t you going to save your boyfriend?”

There’s another crash. So much for lying low.

“Nah,” Gert shrugs, turning away from Karolina and Nico and settling in for a nap.

Chapter Text

Nico is dead.

No.

Not dead..

Karolina refuses it to be true. Nico wasn’t dead. She can’t be dead. She can’t.

Yet the proof lay there in front of her. Or rather, it was the fact that nothing lay in front of her that was  the problem. The complete absence of Nico from the spot where she had just been standing was just as damning a proof as a dead body would have been. 

Nico was gone.

“What did you do?!” Karolina’s scream is punctuated by a shot that Jonah manages to deflect in the nick of time. This only serves to frustrate Karolina more and she hurls a series of shots one after the other. Each shot wilder and more reckless than the previous, and stronger somehow despite Karolina’s steadily depleting energy. There is tremendous anger and loathing directed towards Jonah and simultaneously seeping into her skin. She throws everything she has behind every shot. The pain of losing Nico and having never told her she loved her. Grief that she’s truly gone. Hopelessness.

Karolina is alone.

She screams. A furious and futile gesture. Karolina’s sight is blurred by tears and the colors dancing to the tune of her erratic heartbeat and ragged breaths. Everything glows brilliant and blinding like an aurora trapped within a raging storm. Slowly and surely, everything goes dark. Karolina tries to fight off the dizziness and the dimming in her vision but she has spent all her energy and she’s losing the battle. Jonah, out of breath but composed like Karolina’s barrage did nothing to him, powers down to conserve his own energy. Drained, Karolina falls to the ground on her knees, her shoulders still shaking as her body is wracked with sobs.

“What did you do?” she asks again, voice weaker. An expression akin to pity and sadness flashes on Jonah’s face before disappearing into a cold mask. He schools his expression into one of indifference, and when he speaks his voice is void of emotion. “Remember this pain, Karolina,” he says walking closer, kneeling in front of her and staring her in the eyes. His daughter glares back at him through her tears. “This is what happens when you stand against me.”

Karolina grits her teeth together, an angry snarl painted on her face. Her eyes are bright with loathing. Karolina’s glare follows Jonah as he stands up, in the distance the sound of sirens can be heard. Now standing, Jonah dusts himself off. Moving calmly, methodically, he adjusts his cuffs, his collar, then the buttons on his jacket. He looks around him, looks down on the rest of his daughter’s remaining friends, gloating like they were all beneath him. And they were. His victory today proved that. Jonah’s controlled facade is broken only when his lips curl into a contemptuous sneer. Jonah watches them as they, in turn, glare at him with open defiance and cautiousness.

Karolina does not say anything to Chase when the boy helps her up, choosing instead to squeeze his hand to express her gratitude. Behind her, Chase’s entire body is taut with tension, ready to jump at Jonah if he ever tried to put a hand on Karolina or on any of their friends, broken fistigons be damned. Alex and Gert keep their eyes trained on Jonah as they move to help Molly away from the wreckage she was thrown into earlier in the battle. Molly, exhausted and lightheaded, leans onto her sister for support. With Old Lace leading in front of them, protective and with her lips curled and teeth bared at Jonah, the group move to join Chase and Karolina.

Jonah scoffs at the pathetic display. They stood before him, battered and broken, nothing but a group of recalcitrant children.

“Your stubbornness will get you nowhere,” he says to all of them. “You cannot win.” Then to Karolina, he says, “Give up now while you’ve only lost one person.”

He says it like Nico was perfectly expendable. Like they hadn’t just lost her or, like Nico didn’t have a life ahead of her that she’d deserved to live. Like Karolina never loved her.

Jonah is too impatient to wait for a response. “Well?”

“Never.”

Karolina’s voice is barely above a whisper but it carries, not with volume but with weight. It makes the group stand straighter and Jonah sigh. He shakes his head. They were a pitiful bunch, all far too stubborn and too naive for their own good. He should have expected that answer. Karolina was his daughter. Of course she wouldn’t play easy. However, Jonah was confident he could match her stubbornness and come out as a winner. He would take away all of Karolina’s friends, rip apart their little group, if that was what it would take to have Karolina cowed into submission.

The sirens grow louder. Jonah cocks his head, listening, then as though nothing had happened, his entire demeanor changes. He smiles.

“You and your friends should leave now if you don’t want to be caught by the police.” Jonah even had the gall to sound like a caring father, his expression contorts into a far too convincing display of concern that makes Karolina’s skin crawl. Jonah turns to leave, arrogant and dismissive. He is completely unaffected as the gang glares daggers into his back as he walked away.

The silence that follows Jonah’s departure is deafening. Nobody moves or speaks. The stillness is punctuated only by the sound of their breathing and the approaching police cars.

“We need to go.”

It’s Alex who speaks first. Everybody but Karolina looks at him. Chase and Gert nod almost imperceptibly. Molly is almost completely passed out again. Karolina’s gaze is rooted on the spot where Nico was standing mere minutes earlier. No trace of her remains, neither shred nor speck. Nico was just gone.

Darkness starts creeping in around Karolina’s vision, more insistent this time.

“Karolina?” The voice sounds so far away, muffled like she’d just been submerged underwater. It could be Gert, or Chase, or Alex, or—

For a moment, Karolina wanted to believe that it was Nico who had just called her name.

She wanted to believe that Nico would come running in where Jonah had just exited. That she somehow managed to teleport herself away and she was safe, unharmed, and

Alive.

But she wasn’t.

Whether or not Karolina wanted to believe that Nico was dead seemed inconsequential. A part of her wanted to cling to the hope that Nico didn’t die in the blast, but how would she know for sure? Her father didn’t seem to be the type to half-ass such things. The world starts spinning. Karolina feels like she’s going to puke. Gone in the blink of an eye was supposed to be a saying, an exaggeration at best. Of all the times that it wasn’t, it just had to be now. Nico was gone in the literal blink of an eye. Karolina wasn’t granted the chance to say goodbye or to even think that she needed a chance to do so.

A few hours ago they were just in their room. Everything was fine and they were alone together in a world of their own creation. They were cuddling on their bed and watching Big Hero 6. Tadashi’s death hit Nico hard and they had to pause the movie because she was crying. When she managed to catch her breath, she told Karolina, rather pointedly, “This is why I hate needless heroics. Tadashi didn’t have to die like that.” Nico’s embrace tightened, clinging to Karolina like she could disappear; not realizing that she was the one who—

Karolina remembers how it felt, the dulcet sort of comfort brought about by simply being with Nico, or  being around Nico. She remembered it so acutely it hurt. The ghost of Nico’s warmth wrapped around her taunts her.

(Karolina does not know this, but in that moment, Nico had known herself to be a hypocrite; because if it came to Karolina, she would have made the same decision Tadashi had made.)

Karolina loses herself in the memory. When Nico’s embrace finally loosened, Karolina wriggled out of her arms to turn around and face the other girl. She kissed Nico then, gentle but prodding. Languid like they had all the time in the world. How wrong she had been. Karolina realizes, for the first time, that that was the last time she would ever kiss Nico. And that the closest she ever got to telling Nico she loved her was: “I love how beneath all that tough girl thing you’ve got going on Disney movies can still make you cry.”

Funny how quickly things fall apart.

Karolina wished the encroaching darkness would swallow her wholly and completely, and take her to wherever Nico was. The world tilts out of place, then, the ground is rushing up to meet her with open arms. Karolina is falling, but this time, Nico isn’t there to catch her.

Chapter Text

“I can’t believe you managed to find a place like this in the middle of the city.”

Nico only grins in response, entirely pleased with herself. The research and the planning that led up to tonight was more than worth it. There’s a bounce in Karolina’s step as she looked around, and seeing her genuinely excited (even if it was about a vacant lot) was nothing short of amazing. Nico didn’t miss how reserved her girlfriend has been for the past few days. She was, in fact, more than painfully aware of it. It was an unnerving sort of silence, sad and laced with homesickness. Like an invisible wall grew around Karolina and alienated her from everybody else. She was so withdrawn that sometimes, when Nico drew near, Karolina shied away from her. More than once she’s flinched away from Nico and even if it was completely unintentional, Nico couldn’t help but feel hurt. She wanted nothing more than to ease some of Karolina’s pain.

The product of that endeavor was tonight’s little outing.

The lot was close enough to their hideout that it wasn’t too much of a liability. Furthermore, it was situated close to the outskirts of the city where barely anybody ventured. The place has been abandoned and unused since the building that stood there went up in flames. The area surrounding it wasn’t exactly known for being the safest neighborhood either and, to top it all off, because of the fire many people believed the place was haunted. All in all, it meant that the lot was perfect for getting up to whatever shenanigans the gang wanted to do.

Creating a blizzard in the middle of a summer in a place where it’s technically always summer? Check.

Molly and Old Lace wrestling? Check. Chase blowing up some stuff with the fistigons? Check. Alex practicing with a handgun? Waste of bullets, but check. Karolina practicing how to use her powers, learning how to fly, and just glowing the brightest she can be without fear of being discovered by anyone? Fucking yes, check— 

Especially since Nico has something else up her sleeves to add to the convenience already provided by the lot. 

Although, to be fair, Nico allows, the place was kinda creepy. Especially at night. But, when you’ve been declared fugitives by your serial-killing parents who are part of some fucked up, cult-like group technically, sort of, kind of worshipping, in a weird and totally not normal way, Karolina’s biological dad— what even is creepy, right? Also, Nico has magic and Karolina has super powers. And if the place really was haunted, ghosts would be totally cool.

“You wanna know the best part, K?” Nico waggles her eyebrows as she’s bringing her staff, twirling it it extends with a flourish (she’s been practicing that for days and from the impressed look on Karolina’s face, she’s finally allowed to be smug about, and in Alex and Gert’s words, “going full anime magical girl”). The ghosts of the creepy lot can wait. For now, Nico couldn’t wait to make her girlfriend beam even brighter at the other news she’s got (pun intended).

“Is the best part me getting to spend some alone time with my amazing and beautiful girlfriend?” Karolina asks, her voice dropping to a suggestive huskiness. Her head is tilted questioningly, innocent expression plastered on her face even though the tiny smile on her lips contained just the perfect amount of suggestion.

“I,” Nico stutters, face turning red. I’m sorry, is my girlfriend into exhibitionism now? The look on Karolina’s face turns just a tad bit smug. Nico scowls, she files this little tidbit of information and tucks it somewhere in her brain to be examined later. She clears her throat. “Excuse me, babe, could you just let me finish?”

“That’s what she said.” The statement is muttered under Karolina’s breath, whispered through her teeth as she remains grinning innocently.

“Karolina.”

“Sorry,” Karolina’s tone is sheepish but she doesn’t look apologetic. “You were saying?” Karolina tries to  do her best to look positively innocent.

Nico rolls her eyes but continues anyway. “The best part is this,” she points her staff towards Karolina, “Take off your bracelet.”

Karolina complies, now more curious than before. Instinctively, Nico reaches out as Karolina starts to be enveloped with light. But because Karolina’s more than an arm’s length away, it’s Nico’s staff that’s lightly grazing Karolina’s skin. She doesn’t exactly realize that she’s doing this, her staff trailing down Karolina’s arm. Nico is distracted enough not to notice Karolina’s slight shiver. Nico is completely mesmerized by the way the colors danced on Karolina’s skin. She doesn’t think seeing Karolina like this could ever become any less beautiful.

“Okay, what’s up?” Karolina asks, finally breaking Nico’s trance. Then, smirking, she adds, “Do we need another kink talk?”

Nico abruptly yanks her staff away from Karolina. The contrast of Nico’s current clumsiness from her earlier gracefulness makes Karolina laugh. It was adorable. Nico, on the other hand, tries to glare at Karolina while uselessly ignoring the heat making its way to her cheeks. “Shush and let me concentrate.”

Karolina nods, smirking, and waits. Nico takes a deep breath and lets it down slowly then, finally, she waves her staff, activating the spell she’s been working on. Nothing really overt happens but magic doesn’t always need to be showy.

“Babe?” Karolina’s looks at Nico confusedly. “Is something supposed to happen?”

Nico responds by pulling out her phone and snapping a picture of Karolina.

“Nico, I swear, if you took an embarrassing photo, I—”

Karolina stops speaking the moment Nico shows her the phone’s screen.

“I’m…” she trails off. Karolina walks closer to Nico and swipes to check if there were any other photos and Nico was just messing with her. There weren’t any other photos. She stares at the picture a beat longer before turning around to make sure the picture on Nico’s screen was of the view of the lot behind her. It was.

Finally, Karolina asks, “I’m not on the picture?”

“Nope.” Nico grins at Karolina proudly.

“But I’m not invisible?” Karolina looks at her arms and feet, then at the faint glow her lights were casting on the ground and on Nico. Yep, she was still there and very visible. “How?”

“Magic,” Nico twirls her staff again (fuck she was getting good at this). “Spell only works on phones and other stuff— which means nobody will be able snap a picture or take a video of you as long as the spell’s active.”

Karolina’s eyes widen, expression transforming from confused to impressed, “How did you do it?”

“I’m a genius,” Nico shrugs like it wasn’t big deal. In reality, it took her weeks to figure out how to finally make the spell happen. She practiced casting it for months to make sure it was perfect and that she could sustain it easily. Honestly, the whole staff twirling thing was child’s play compared to all the leaps and bounds she pulled to get the spell to work flawlessly. “Also I made Chase exercise his brain a little bit to help me pull it off. Alex is always going on about how the staff is science and not magic so I figured I’d apply a little science.” 

It was definitely a whole lot of effort and it, of course, begged the question—

“Why not just make me invisible? Wouldn’t that be easier?”

“Uhm,” Another blush creeps its way on her cheeks and Nico tries not to choke on her response. “Yes.”

It’s one word. How do you choke on one word?

“And?” Karolina prompts.

“I,” wow, is it hot out here or is it just me? My face is red enough for a tomato commercial, isn’t it? “I didn’t” pause. swallow. “want to, uh, to” stutter. choke. “not be able to see you?” Nico forces the words out haltingly, voice becoming smaller until the last word comes out as a squeak. 

A beat passes, then another. Nico fidgets uneasily. Finally, Karolina grins and pulls Nico into a tight hug. She leans down and kisses Nico gratefully, “You are adorable and amazing and smart and I—” love you “am utterly impressed by you.”

“Yeah, well, I gotta keep up with how blindingly awesome you are so…” She trails off. Nico wants to say she wasn’t preening but she definitely was. It definitely didn’t hurt that she liked basking in Karolina’s praise. “Go on, practice flying and shiz.”

With one last peck on Nico’s lips, Karolina untangles herself from Nico and takes off running. When her feet are no longer touching the concrete, Karolina lets out an exhilarated, gleeful squeal. She’s a little shaky at first but she manages; then, Karolina is flying. Every dash and turn and loop she makes is entrancing to watch. At first, Nico is dumbfounded by how easy Karolina makes flying seem to be. She’s comfortable and graceful and wow. Seeing Karolina flying is like watching the unfurling of freedom. It makes Nico feel light. Like she could fly. Like she is flying. (Hey, maybe she’ll come up with a spell that’ll let her fly alongside Karolina.)

Karolina paints the night sky beautifully and Nico’s pissed she can’t save any of it on video. Damn herself for making such an effective spell. Sometimes it sucks to be good at what you do. Well, whatever. They’ll have more moments like this, Nico thinks. She’ll have more days where she’ll watch Karolina illuminate the dark skies, or put sunsets and sunrises to shame. Whichever. Sure, they’re on the run now and their lives are caught up in a conspiracy theorist’s wet dream, but Nico’s sure they’ll always get moments like these: where the world is quiet and Nico’s enveloped by Karolina’s laughter and her heart is beating wildly even as her gut fills with complete content. Because there’s no way any of the fucked up, crazy situations they’ll probably get into wouldn’t be bearable and beautiful as long as she has Karolina by her side. 

Perfect moments are riddled with the worst imperfections, but that’s what makes them perfect, right? That things could still be pure and wonderful even though everything else looks like they’re about to fall apart. 

Nico found the most exquisite view she has ever seen thus far in her life, right there in a creepy, abandoned lot found in a neighborhood neck-deep in crime. There before her is a shooting star burning brighter and more vibrant than anything she’s ever seen; not at all falling but filled with the boundless potential to fly. Despite everything that’s happened (and anything else that’s probably going to come barreling their way) Nico doesn’t have any more wishes to make. Karolina made her dream come true (without even realizing it) when she summoned up the courage to kiss her. Sure, shit went downhill pretty fast after that, and for a moment Nico thought she had lost Karolina for good, but that was a landslide Nico would dare ride again. 

Maybe it was the timing, or the circumstances, or maybe it was fate. Regardless, Nico fell hard and fast and

“I love her.”

The realization comes out as a whisper, breathless like she’d been sucker-punched, but it was a good kind of impact. Nico is filled with so much love and affection it almost feels as though she could shatter with all that she contained within her; but there was no fear or shame to be found in her self-shattering. Because every fragment of her shattered self would gravitate towards Karolina, and with her is where Nico will be anchored, every fragment converging into itself, making her whole again. It’s a sublime coming undone, awe-inspiring and beautiful.

Nico is in love and it’s amazing.

“Earth to Nico, hey?”

Nico’s thoughts are dragged back to reality, when Karolina calls her name. Her eyes focus on Karolina who was floating (horizontally, like the air was her freaking bed or something) right in front of her and very, very close. Nico juts her chin forward just a bit and places a soft kiss on Karolina’s lips before responding.

“Yes, babe?”

“I asked you if you wanted to fly with me.” Nico can’t see through Karolina’s literal glow up, but she’s at least eighty-seven percent sure Karolina is blushing (the left over thirteen percent is just in case Karolina’s cheeks are already flushed from all the flying).

“Nah,” Nico shrugs, mostly teasing, “I don’t wanna fall.”

Karolina scoffs and waves a hand dismissively, “You won’t.”

“No.” 

“Please?”

“No.” Nico tries to suppress the smile forcing its way onto her lips.

“I promise I won’t let you fall.”

“You say that as if I haven’t already fallen for you,” Nico finally smirks, proud of the set up. There’s an expression on Karolina’s face that matches the one she gets when she blushes at Nico’s teasing, lips pursed but eyes shining with mirth. 

Then, Karolina’s expression transforms into a huge smile almost smug enough to be a smirk. “You say that as if I didn’t catch you.” She says that as if Nico didn’t catch her first.

Karolina plunged first, headlong towards Nico’s arms despite the uncertainty of whether or not those arms were open to catch her. 

Nico, too, took the plunge, propelled herself towards a love all at once unknown and familiar. 

They catch each other, and they fall, arms entwined; and because they are together, they fly.

I caught you.

So you did.

Nico laughs, feeling breathless and carefree. Karolina laughs with her, swaying in the air to the music of  their laughter. They fall silent, the quiescence is pregnant with meaning and permeated by unspoken adoration. A beat passes where one or both of them are holding their breaths. Finally, Nico blurts out,—

“Hey, can I tell you something?”

“Of course.” Karolina’s smile is gentle. She floats down, vertically this time, her feet as close to the ground as it could be. She hovers close to Nico, their gazes meeting.

Nico takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. She waits for another beat, simply looking into Karolina’s eyes, wondering why she’s never talked about this before. “I was never unsure with you,” Nico begins to say, “not really, at least not like I was unsure with Alex.”

Karolina’s lips part with surprise, eyes widening a fraction. Her heartbeat was way too loud in her ears, yet, still, Nico’s voice was ringing louder. “Kissing you felt nothing like kissing him.”

“Please tell me I was the better kisser.” Karolina says this to diffuse the giddy tightness in her chest, maybe give herself time to stop blushing.

“You are,” Nico grins, “By far, I promise.”

“Nice.” A shy, little exclamation.

“Now, hush. Let me continue.”

“Sorry, go on.”

“When you kissed me for the first time—” Nico begins to explain, the memory of their first kiss flashes in her mind and suddenly she was feeling parched. She clears her throat. Once. Twice. “When you kissed me for the first time, I thought,” Nico pauses again, trying to figure out how to phrase the next part of her sentence without sounding overly sappy before throwing her cares to the wind because this was a sappy moment anyway. “The first time you kissed me, I thought, Is this what princesses feel like?”

Karolina can’t help herself, she giggles, her giddiness bubbling up her throat and spilling from her lips unbidden. She stifles her laughter, finally managing to say, “Somehow that sentence didn’t go the direction I thought it would.”

Nico gives Karolina a light but chastising look that quiets the blonde girl. Karolina’s expression turns sheepish as she nods for Nico to continue.

Nico sighs, but she continues. Is this what it feels princess feel like? Because “It felt like being woken by true love’s kiss.” The memory makes Nico smile. She pauses again, this time just to take in the way Karolina looked after hearing those words, all loving and a curious, standing there before her with lights and rainbows illuminating her skin. 

Nico feels at home in Karolina’s gaze.

“I felt alive, and whole. Everything in my brain just went quiet and all I could think was how soft your lips were, how you tasted like, how your breath felt on my lips.” Embarrassed, a tinge of pink makes itself apparent on Nico’s cheeks. Nevertheless, she says, “When I kissed you, I just knew.”

“Knew what?” And Karolina’s question is phrased with the same sort of breathlessness that forced out the words I love her from Nico’s mouth.

“That I was going to fall in love with you,” Nico cups Karolina’s face with both her hands and pulls her closer (Karolina is still floating, and for a moment she wonders if she can get Karolina to kiss her upside down. But that’s stuff for later). “And I knew,” she carries on, “that I was going to love being in love with you.”

It’s not quite the I love you Nico wanted to say but the sentiment was the same regardless.

It was the perfect moment for Karolina to say, I love you too, Nico, but the words don’t come out. Because the syllables are stuck in her throat, Karolina opts, instead, to show the sentiments behind those words. Bursting with happiness and adoration, she kisses Nico. Unlike the soft kisses they’ve been giving each other so far, this kiss was deeper, warm but not quiet inflaming, at least not yet. But it comes. Warmth turning into heat turning into—

Nico feels herself literally being lifted off the ground. She wraps her legs around Karolina’s waist (Holy fuck, they were making out a few feet off the ground), her fingers entangling themselves into Karolina’s blonde curls. Nico bites down softly on Karolina’s bottom lip. Somebody moans between the two of them and

Suddenly, Karolina’s lights are dimming and she’s falling on top of Nico. The breath gets knocked out of their lungs with a loud oomph and they’re sprawled on the uncomfortable concrete.

Karolina props herself up on her elbows, rough cement going unnoticed as it digs into her skin She’s looking down at Nico with a loopy smile on her face.

“I fell.”

“You did.”

“And you caught me.”

The expression on Nico’s face is soft and filled with fondness, the ghost of a smile gracing her lips, “Always.”

Karolina wakes up with Nico’s name on her lips and an emptiness slowly creeping in as her dream faded into her unconsciousness. She finds herself nestled in someone’s warmth. It’s comforting and soothing enough that, for a moment, she tries to convince herself it was Nico holding her. Karolina doesn’t open her eyes and tries to distract herself from the despairing thoughts trying to claw its way to the forefront of her brain. She focuses on the arms around her and channels the memory of the first night she fell asleep cuddling with Nico.

She remembers feeling saved, not just because the group had come to her rescue but because the reality that Nico hadn’t pushed her away was finally sinking in. Karolina focuses on what it was like to have her chest filled with so much hope, of feeling beloved by Nico. Karolina tries, but the attempt is meaningless as it does nothing to quash the emptiness sitting in the pit of her stomach.

Karolina opens her eyes. The van (probably, definitely hot-wired and to be ditched somewhere inconspicuous) is blanketed by a silence reeking of melancholy. 

Alex is driving. He’s sitting alone in front, hands gripping the steering wheel tight enough to make his hands shake. Old Lace is curled in the back and asleep, leaving Karolina, Chase, Gert, and Molly crammed in the middle. Nico is nowhere to be found. Of course she isn’t. The false sense of calm Karolina tried so hard to cling to shatters. The storm sets in, roiling and smothering, as reality crashes down around her. Karolina tries to stamp down the onslaught of feelings trying to force its way out of her chest. Her throat is tight with a stinging pain, making Karolina take in a shuddering breath.

Instinctively, Chase’s arms tighten around Karolina, voice laced with concern, “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Like crap.” Karolina forces the words, the understatement of the century, out with a croak. She doesn’t try to extract herself away from Chase. She was too tired, and right now he was perfectly comfortable.

“I hope you’re fine with Chase as your pillow.” Gert says, craning her neck to look at Karolina, a worried looking her face. Gert’s arms are draped around Molly as the younger girl slept.

“Ride’s bumpy,” Chase explains, “We didn’t want you to be jostled around and Molly’s already latched onto Gert pretty tight.”

“I hope you didn’t mind me stealing your boyfriend,” Karolina murmured. Despite trying to make her tone light, her attempt at joking falls flat.

“It’s fine,” Gert replies, the rest of her words are spat out hurriedly they’re almost toppling over the other, “Technically, you can’t ‘steal’ him away. Chase is a really good cuddler, and you probably—”

“Gert.” Alex interrupts, looking at her reflection on the rearview mirror. 

“Sorry,” Gert winces, pursing her lips, chastised. The apologetic look she throws Karolina’s way is met with a smile that was kind but tired.

Alex pulls out a bottle of sports drink from somewhere and passes it to the back, “Could you please give this to Karolina?”

“Sure.” Gert reaches for the bottle, uncaps it without completely removing the cap and passing the drink to Karolina.

“Thanks,” Karolina mutters as she receives the drink, then a little louder, she adds, “Thanks, Alex.”

“No problem,” Alex answers, weariness evident in his voice. There’s a small smile etched on his face, directed at Karolina even though the girl couldn’t see him.

After that exchange, everything falls silent again. Nobody acknowledges the presence of the gaping hole in their packed car. Trying to swallow down the scream clawing its way out of her throat, Karolina chugs the sports drink, finishing the entire bottle with big, desperate gulps. She manages to screw the bottle shut before letting her arms fall to her lap, bottle gripped loosely in her hands.

After a beat, Karolina drops the bottle and shifts positions. She angles her body towards the window as much as the limited space allowed. Karolina opts to curl into herself, her back pressed against Chase.

“Chase, can I stay here for a bit longer?” she asks without looking at him.

Chase nods wordlessly, Karolina buries her head against her arms. She starts to cry. Eyesight blurred, cheeks wet, shaky breaths, and body trembling. Karolina wished unconsciousness would just take her back into its arms, but it doesn’t. Rather, she’s assaulted by the memory of Nico disappearing before her eyes. 

Chase can pinpoint the exact moment his heart shatters in sympathy for Karolina and in grieving for Nico. His arms tighten around Karolina, feeling both concerned and protective. Chase wished he didn’t feel so powerless because it fucking sucked. The thought of losing Gert was, alone, terrifying for Chase. He couldn’t imagine what Karolina must have been feeling now, only that she didn’t deserve what she was going through. Nico didn’t deserve to die. Jonah had no right to take her away from them.

On Gert’s face is etched a profound sadness. Her heart clenches in her chest as she listened to Karolina’s soft whimpers. It could have been any of them in Nico’s place tonight. Gert tightens her embrace around Molly and kisses the top of her head. Molly stirs, nuzzling closer to her sister but otherwise remaining asleep. Gert wished she could turn back time and figure out a way to save Nico. The next time she saw Jonah, she was going to sic Old Lace at him and make sure he was deinonychus food.

Alex keeps his eyes on the road. He doesn’t dare peek a glance at the rearview mirror and tries to block out the sound of Karolina subdued sobs. Alex furiously wipes the tears on his cheeks with the back of his right hand, his left hand remained clutching the steering wheel with a death grip. He’s tired. His heart is aching and his throat is swelling shut. Like Chase, Alex felt powerless. He tries to push the other thoughts away from his head and tries to focus on ensuring he got everyone back home safely and in one piece. They’ll recuperate, they’ll train harder. Next time, they’ll do better and—

A sharp intake of breath from Karolina reminds him that “everyone” now no longer included Nico.

This is the echo that reverberates: Nico is gone.

Finally, Alex lets himself take a look at the reflection of his friends on the mirror; seeing Karolina’s crying form as well as the forlorn expressions on Chase’s and Gert’s face made him seethe with determination. He drags his eyes away from the mirror and directs his glare at the road. They were going figure out a way to bring Nico back. There was no way Nico was dead. That wasn’t wishful thinking, it was logic. There was no way Jonah would have actually risked killing her. Nico was leverage especially after what he’d done to Amy. Even if he had some other leverage over the Minorus, (the videos, for example), Nico was at least an assurance that the Minorus would not betray him. Nico couldn’t be dead. It just didn’t seem plausible and Alex didn’t want to be wrong.

Jonah’s words to Karolina loom over the heads of all the occupants in the car: Remember this pain … this is what happens when you stand against me.

The world decelerates and ceases moving. Everything stagnates into an oppressive stillness. The gaping void left by Nico’s apparent death sucks the life out of the air, making everything too thick and too heavy to breathe in.

More familiar sceneries begin surrounding the van as they draw closer to their safe house, their way back takes them to a part of the neighborhood that had managed to endear itself to Karolina— the vacant lot where she and Nico (and the rest of the gang) occasionally hang out in was situated in that particular area. Karolina, no longer crying now, keeps her eyes rooted on the passing views outside the window. They don’t exactly pass by the abandoned lot but knowledge of its existence (and of the memories it carried) taunted Karolina. 

The safe house comes into view minutes later. Then, finally, their van comes to a stop.

We’re home.

It’s the thought echoing in everybody’s head, tainted only by the knowledge that not all of them made it back.

Chapter Text

The adrenaline wore off nearly half an hour ago. His heart was as steady as it could be for an athletic, healthy, nineteen year-old. Still, Chase didn’t feel so calm. The memory of his heart throbbing in his ears and pounding against his chest is too clear, too loud to be a mere echo. 

The safe house is shrouded in an eerie sort of silence, a thick and oppressive silence that Chase desperately hates. He can feel the precarious peace hanging in the air as surely as he felt it trying to scratch its way beneath the surface of his skin. The anxiety is familiar. Chase recognizes the calm before the storm, the moment right before everything explodes and the world tilts out of balance.

All around him, everything is quiet, but Chase is sure the calm isn’t going to last. The storm that’s going to set in is one that has been in the making for several months. They all tried to ignore it, and that was their mistake: going on like there wasn’t a tempest brewing in the horizon. 

A long-winded sigh escapes his lips, leaving him almost breathless. He’s just tired, Chase thinks, too tired. Swirling thoughts and jumbled memories. High strung yet weary. Frustrated and numb. Nothing is happening yet but it already feels like too much. I need to get ice. He reaches towards the handle of the freezer. Contact. Cold, unfeeling metal against a not-particularly-warm hand. Clammy hand. Slightly trembling hand. Chase’s grip tightens around the handle. Tightens, tighter. White knuckles. He yanks at the handle hard. Too hard. The refrigerator shakes as the freezer door swings open. Chase wrestles to loosen his grip. He sighs again. Stares at the near-empty freezer like it offended him personally. He squeezes his eyes shut. Breathe in. Hold. Out, slowly. Repeat. Once, twice, three times. Close eyes. Inhale deeply. Hold. Exhale slowly. Chase opens his eyes. I am okay. 

We are okay.

‘We’ meaning all of them.

‘All of them’ meaning not including Nico.

He winces at the thought. He sees the storm in the corner of his eyes ready to explode. How long has it been? Six months? Seven? Nico has been dead for close to seven months. They should have talked about it instead of letting it fester like an open wound. He can feel the rot crawling in his bones, dancing against his skin, burying in his muscles. Why didn’t they ever talk about it? Nico deserved to be talked about and remembered and instead they went on pretending like everything was okay.

Chase grabs the bag of frozen peas, it’s the only thing sitting in the freezer. It has been sitting there for months forgotten. Nobody ever really stashed anything in the freezer unless one of them was feeling particularly decadent and bought a tub of ice cream. So there it was: a lonely bag of peas. 

It was Nico who bought it.

Nico we don’t need peas.

Yeah, nobody likes peas.

You won’t be saying that when you have a bruise and you need a bag of peas.

Why can’t we just use ice?

Trust me, we’re going to need the peas.

Funny how Nico’s ghost could haunt him via the presence of expired vegetable. But she was right, after all. Someone had a bruise and they needed the frozen peas. 

Chase closes the freezer door, gentler this time. He’s been crying this whole time, he realizes. He wipes away the tears with the back of his hand. Breath in, his breath shudders. Hold. One, two, three… breath out, slowly. Repeat. Bag of peas in hand, Chase walks out of the kitchen and to the living room.

Old Lace follows Molly out of the living room, sensing Gert’s urging and the worried glance that she throws her sister’s way as Molly stepped out. They pass by Chase in the hallway. Old Lace is sensitive enough, familiar enough with Chase, and bonded enough with Gert, to know that something was wrong (even if the red eyes and slightly wet cheeks weren’t signs enough).

She nuzzles against Chase’s chest, purring as if to console. 

Chase chuckles in response, he pets Old Lace appreciatively, “I’ll be fine, girl. Go ahead and follow Molly.”

Old Lace moves her head, as though to nod. Chase steps in the living room and she follows Molly upstairs to her room.

The door to Molly’s room is left ajar in anticipation of Old Lace. The deinonychus pushes the door open and walks in and toward Molly’s bed side. Molly was lying on the bed, curled into a tight ball and crying. Old Lace rests her head on top of Molly’s legs, purring again. Absentmindedly, Molly reaches out and strokes Old Lace’s head.

If Old Lace could speak, she would ask Molly what was wrong. If Molly didn’t feel too choked up to speak, she would tell Old Lace how difficult and painful it was to see Karolina running headlong into danger like it didn’t matter if she was throwing her life away. She would talk about how frustrated and angry she felt and how Karolina doesn’t get to rush off headfirst to her death like losing her won’t hurt the team. She would say how terrified she’d been seeing Karolina’s unconscious form being laid down on the couch by Chase. She would tell Old Lace how horrible it felt like to wake up and realize one of your best friends was dead. Because that’s what happened to her the night that Jonah killed Nico. She was unconsciousness, lying in the pile of debris she helped create when Jonah blasted her away.

But Molly is too angry to speak. She’s angry enough that there’s no more fight left in her and all she can do is cry and lie limply on the bed. The weight of Old Lace against her legs, the sensation of Old Lace purring, and the feel of the ridges on the deinonychus’s head beneath her hands was a comfort, grounding her so it doesn’t feel like she’s about to float away.

Molly doesn’t need to say anything because, to a degree, Old Lace understands. She feels what Gert feels and so she knows how empty longing felt like. She recognizes the skewed balance and the uneasy stillness hunched over her humans, sense their pain in the air. Nico’s absence is a loss to her too, and not just because Gert misses her.

Old Lace perks up, sensing a change in Gert’s mood, a flare of something not entirely good. She lifts her head up slowly so as not to startle Molly. She cocks her head slightly, trying to get a feel if Gert was reaching out and calling for her presence downstairs. 

“Is it Gert?” Molly whispers, voice hoarse and catching in her throat. Old Lace turns her attention back to Molly, who’s now sitting up and wiping her falling tears. “Should we go to her?” A hiccup makes her stutter.

Old Lace shakes her head no. Even if it felt like Gert was distressed, Old Lace could also sense the girl’s desire for her to stay with Molly. She remembers the worry radiating off of Gert seeing how rattled Molly had been when Karolina was knocked unconscious. When they’re both needed downstairs, Gert would call for them, but for now, Old Lace stays with Molly. She nuzzles herself against Molly the way she did with Chase earlier, prompting a hug from the other girl. 

If Old Lace could speak, she would tell Molly that everything was going to be okay eventually, and that, for now, it was okay for Molly to grieve and be mad.

If Molly could hear Old Lace, she’d believe those thoughts to be true.

Chase lays Karolina down on the couch carefully even though she’s completely passed out. She’s caked in soot, mud, and blood that’s both hers and isn’t. Gert kneels beside the couch and checks Karolina for cuts they may have missed and needed to clean, bruises that were already forming. Wordlessly, Chase brings her a basin filled with water and a hand towel. Gert thanks him quietly as he mumbles an excuse about getting some ice. 

Gert watches as Chase exits the room. His tensed posture and clenched fists doesn’t go unnoticed. Gert sighs. She bows her head down and brings up a hand to massage her forehead. After a moment, Gert finally dares to bring her gaze to Karolina’s prone form. A breath hitches in her throat, turning into a lump that seems to make her throat constrict. Gert swallows it down, ignoring the knife twisting in her chest and choosing to focus on the fact that Karolina is breathing. That she’s still breathing. That’s she’s not dead. Gert takes a deep breath, deeper, letting it all out with one shuddering sigh. She takes a hand towel and wets it. Gert begins to work on cleaning the dried blood and mud on Karolina’s skin. She works silently, methodically; focusing on getting Karolina cleaned up instead of the cuts and bruises. Carefully, she lifts Karolina’s shirt to check to check the blow she took to her ribs.

Gert winces at the sight. Karolina’s ribcage were, unsurprisingly, bruising; it’s an angry mismatch of blue, black and red on the left side of her body. That’s what happens when a 260 pounds of pure muscle barrels into you.

“I’m gonna go to my room.”

Gert jerks, head whipping towards the sound of Molly’s cracked voice. Her eyes were glued to Karolina’s injury. Suddenly, she’s guilty for getting so caught up in her own musings that she forgot about her sister still being in the room. 

“Molly?” Her sister doesn’t reply, merely looks at her with a downcast and tired expression. Gert suppresses the urge to sigh, saying, “She’s going to be okay.”

“I know,” Molly replies softly, mouth cast in a tightlipped smile . The sisters look at each other for half a beat longer before Molly starts to walk out of the room. Gert, worried about her sister, urges Old Lace to follow her.

Chase walks into the room a few seconds after Old Lace and Molly exit.

“I have frozen peas,” he says, holding up the bounty he freed from the freezer. There’s a small smile on his face and he’s less tensed than earlier and it makes Gert relax a bit.

“We definitely need it,” she says.

Chase catches sight of the bruises as he passed the bag of peas to Gert. He grimaces, taking in a sharp intake of air. “Damn, K, what have you gotten yourself into this time?” he murmurs softly. To Gert, he asks, “Do you think she broke a rib?”

“Hopefully not,” Gert sighs. They were low on medical supplies and they hadn’t had the time for a supply run because Karolina had been determinedly fucking up Jonah’s extensive connections. Sabotage a lab here, undermine a firm there, blow up a warehouse here, etc. Of course, out of all of them, Karolina had been the one to use up most of their medical supplies. If Gert knew any better, she’d say the girl had a death wish.

Maybe, she does.

There it was again. The tightness in her chest, the lump in her throat, the blurring at the edges of her vision, the memory of Karolina’s screaming and crying the night Nico died all coming together in one blasted cacophony.

“Gert.” It’s Chase, there’s a note of concern seeping into his voice. He’s kneeling beside Gert now, hand firm on her shoulder. “You okay?”

Tightlipped smile. Nod. “Yeah.”

Focus. Gert tells herself, gritting her teeth. Sensing the turmoil, Chase leans in and presses a kiss to her temple. Gert leans in, breathing in the air around them (Chase smelled like an oddly complementary mixture of sandalwood, smoke, and something distinctly electrical— literally like an overloaded circuit board. The last part is technically unsurprising considering they did blow something up earlier).

Banishing the panic edging into her gut, Gert concentrates on the contrast of heat and cold emanating from Chase and the bag of frozen peas. Most importantly, she focuses on taking care of Karolina. Breathe in. Hold. One, two, three… Exhale. Slowly, gently, she places the passable (hopefully temporary substitute) ice pack on Karolina’s bruised ribs. The blonde girl stirs, groans, but doesn’t wake. 

A whisper teases its way out of Karolina’s lips. Gert thinks it sounded a lot like Nico’s name and it saddens her. A combination of heartache and wistfulness settles across her shoulder like a blanket that was all weight and no comfort. She misses Nico, her little jibes, the teasing smirks, and her surprisingly animated way of telling stories. Gert misses having someone who could match her deadpan humor and sarcasm, and someone who could match her barbs without flinching. It hurt to miss Nico and Gert couldn’t imagine what that pain even meant for Karolina.

Gert sighs.

“Where’s Alex?” Gert asks, snapping out of her reverie.

Chase frowns, “I don’t know.” He looks at Karolina again, drawn to the pained whimper that escapes her lips, before bringing his gaze back towards Gert. 

As if on cue, Alex enters. Alex’s strides are long and heavy. Jaw set tight and glaring behind his glasses. He heads towards the table without any preamble. He drops the paper bag on the table haphazardly before turning around and heading straight for door again.

Gert and Chase speak at the same time: “Alex where—” “What—”

They’re cut off by Alex’s growl, “Medicine.”

Alex walks out of the room without turning around. His stomping footsteps echo in the empty hallway. Then, there’s a door slamming somewhere in the house. Gert winces. Chase sighs. Karolina remains sleeping.

Karolina has not slept in her bedroom in months, choosing, instead, to make the living room her permanent residence. [Redacted: It has been months since Karolina has slept in the bedroom she used to share with Nico.] So-called permanent residence is rarely used by Karolina regardless; and so the living room is empty until she staggers in after hours of being outside doing god knows what. Karolina sleeps too late and wakes up before the sun rises (which is entirely too early for her morning meditations). She rarely sleeps but for whatever reason she has managed to stay upright, alert (as much as a wounded and cornered animal can be), and simply barrels through whatever mission they’ve got going on. It’s impressive if not worrying. Alex doesn’t ask. There’s no point in asking when you already know the answer. Neither has he bothered talking Karolina out of her dangerous and rash antics. Clearly, Alex thinks as guilt wells in the pit of his stomach, he should have.

The living room has become Karolina’s space, a barred cage that nobody knew how to unlock. With walls erected by Karolina that nobody knew how to penetrate. When Karolina is in the living room they leave her there to brood on her own (as much as it can be called “brooding” when it comes to Karolina, at least). She has successfully isolated herself from everybody else: all smiles and sunshines that are just a bit too fake and a bit too dull. I’m fine, she would say even when they could all hear the lie from a mile away. 

Maybe the reason why they’ve all simply given up on getting through to Karolina is because none of them knew how to get through to themselves either. How do you help Karolina deal with losing Nico when you have no idea how to deal with it yourself? At least, that’s what Alex thought. Right now, looking at Karolina’s sleeping form, the question is yet again running through his mind. He still doesn’t have an answer. All Alex knew for sure was that he needed to do something about it before the group comes apart. Karolina getting injured as badly as she had gotten today was the last straw, at least, it’s the last one before everything goes to shit; so Alex decided he wasn’t going to wait for the camel’s back to break before he makes a move.

Karolina has always had a touch of recklessness to her, one that Alex has criticized a million years ago. But that recklessness was born out of selflessness, of her desire to protect her friends. Her recklessness now was different. It was, as far as Alex could comprehend, self-flagellation and, at worse, a death wish.  

Self-harm isn’t always blades and fire and shit, Alex.

I know that, Gert.

Do you?

I spent years blaming myself for Amy’s death. I know.

Karolina’s lights haven’t quite dimmed but they’ve turned gray, and it terrifies Alex. Jonah barely has any color when he calls forth his powers. And Jonah was— What if Karolina ends up—

Alex shakes his head. No. Karolina was different. There’s no way she would— Alex wasn’t going to let Karolina become anything like Jonah; if not for Karolina’s sake then for the sake of Nico’s memory. Fuck. Alex inhales sharply. Jonah was arrogant, selfish, and cruel. Karolina was grieving. Suddenly, Alex is awash with horror and shame for even making the association. Before he can delve into his thoughts further, his musings are interrupted by Karolina stirring, a sound that’s halfway between a strangled shout and a drawn out groan comes out of her lips.

Alex jumps out of his chair instinctively, body taut with tension and ready to help Karolina. Even after it becomes apparent that Karolina’s not waking up yet (even after the loud scrape of his chair against the floor or the loud thwack that comes from his knee hitting the leg of the table), Alex remains standing. He waits for two beats longer before slumping back down on the chair. He buries his head in his hands and sighs. He stays in that position until he finishes counting from fifty down to zero, then he straightens up, slowly, as if he’s terrified he would wake Karolina up (or terrified he was going to fall apart).

One. Two. Three. Four. Five… Alex lifts and pulls the chair closer to the table. Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen… He sets his arms on the table, resting his head against them. Twenty. Twenty-one. Twenty-two. Twenty-three… Alex releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, relief washes over him like a tidal wave. Thirty-three. Thirty-four. Thirty-five… He’s not ready to confront Karolina just yet, he realizes. Fuck. What do I even say?

Alex lifts his head up an inch, brings his gaze back towards Karolina. Even unbidden, his brain begins replaying what happened nearly five hours earlier: 

Molly’s face crumpling when the muscled henchman’s fists connected with Karolina mid-flight. Old Lace pushing against Chase who was ready to throw himself against the man who’d just pummeled Karolina to the ground. The raw panic and the distress in Gert’s voice when she screams Karolina’s name. And Alex… 

He’d stood there, gun clenched tightly in his fist, all at once frozen with fear and numbed by shock. He saw Karolina go down and all he could think of was—No! Not her too!—something in his brain just clicked into place, then, in the next second, he has his gun pointed at Muscles and he’s pulling the trigger. Even after the bullet hit Muscles squarely in the shoulder, he didn’t flinch. He kept walking towards them, not exactly menacing, just dispassionate. Alex was pissed and had been close to throwing the gun in Muscles’ direction but before his body could even follow through with his brain’s impulses, Muscles was already being thrown off his feet by a blast coming from Karolina. Alex managed to breathe again, relief and concern mixing and roiling in his gut.

She had managed to get up, flying two feet in the air, eyes bright and skin blinding. It was a terrifying sight, but at the same time, awe-inspiring. By some miracle, Karolina had managed to knock Muscles out cold. She remained floating for half a minute, chest heaving, wincing, then faltering in the next second. It was Molly who caught Karolina before she crashed. Karolina had managed to mumble a quiet ‘thank you,’ before fainting. Alex pretended he couldn’t see the way Molly had gritted her teeth or how the muscles in her jaw worked. 

Karolina hasn’t woken up since then. Injury or not, she needed the sleep.

Alex tears his gaze away, closes his eyes, and brings his head back down to his arms. He was going to talk to Karolina. He needed to. He will. He wasn’t going to let Karolina push him away anymore. But for now— Alex’s shoulders sags, all the tension flowing out of his body. He’s tired. He’s just so fucking tired.

Alex pretends he’s going to feel better after waking up.

Nico would die trying to protect you.

The words have become distorted, becoming a cacophony of shrieks crashing into one another and against Karolina’s cranium. Louder and louder the words become, a cruel taunt grating in her ears and placing an enormous pressure on her chest.

Nico died trying to protect you.

Karolina jars awake. She bolts upright, with her blood ringing in her ears, and her heart beating painfully against her bruised ribs. Alex words, twisted as her mind had made them, were still haunting her. Her chest heaved, her breathing labored, but it felt like inhaling sand. Suddenly, Karolina is filled with the urge to claw at her throat. She was in pain. She felt like she’d been ran over by a truck ten times and then the truck backed up for good measure every time. There was a burning sensation in her ribs, a sharp ache that was intensified with each labored breath. Karolina tries to tell herself to breathe easy—You’re okay. Breathe.—slower, deeper, more carefully; but the more she tells herself to calm down the more the panic blooms in her gut.

It's Alex who finally calms her down.

Karolina didn’t really notice Alex being in the same room as she was until he’s suddenly beside her, kneeling on the ground, one hand placed gently against her back and another hand offering her a glass of water to drink. He’s speaking in hushed tones, there’s almost something rhythmic in the way his words were tumbling out of his mouth. It’s oddly comforting. When Karolina finally gets to the point where she doesn’t feel like clawing at her throat anymore, she takes the glass and chugs the water down, pointedly ignoring her pained ribs. When it’s emptied, Alex takes the glass without a word, stands up, and puts it down on the table.

Karolina thinks she hears Alex say something along the lines of Wait here, she scoffs (she thinks she did), as if she could go anywhere in her condition anyway. Karolina doesn’t say anything to him and Alex simply walks out of the living room, less than a minute later his back with an ice pack in his hands (the bag of peas is out of commission). He gives the ice pack to Karolina, who gingerly places it against her ribs. She sighs against the cooling sensation. Alex props the pillow behind her and helps her get more comfortable. Karolina mumbles an incoherent noise that vaguely resembles a ‘thank you.’

After a while, Alex finally speaks.

“How are you feeling?”

“Probably worse than how I look.”

“Good.”

Karolina rolls her eyes. “Impressive bedside manners, Alex.”

“I wasn’t the one who decided to fly into wall made of muscles.”

“I flew into someone’s fist.”

“My bad.” Alex glowers at Karolina, but the look he gives her goes ignored and unseen. 

“What are you doing here?” Karolina asks, finally looking at Alex. There’s no hostility in her voice, just curiosity.

“I needed to talk to you,” Alex answers honestly. “And, anyway, Gert didn’t want you to be left alone so I volunteered to stay here while they sleep.”

“You need to sleep too.”

Alex jerks his thumb towards the table behind him, “I did fall asleep, actually.”

They pause, a bit of awkwardness is hanging in the air. They’re both unsure of how to continue.

“Didn’t know you cared, Alex,” Karolina finally mutters. The words are uttered softly, almost bitterly.

Alex frowns at her, confused, taken aback, and clearly hurt. “Of course I do.”

Karolina ducks her head and avoids his gaze. She swallows in an attempt to stamp down the guilt rising in her chest. “Sorry,” she says, because she doesn’t know what else to say.

“You know we all care about you, right?” Alex asks her, there’s an edge to his voice that Karolina can’t place. She think it sounds like Alex might be on the verge of tears. She’s never heard him speak with a tone that soft or that unsure.

“I know.” Karolina’s heart clenches in her chest and she gives in to the guilt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…” she trails off. Alex looked so sad and lost and Karolina has no idea what to say.

Alex looks away, lost in thought. Karolina can see the warring emotions in his eyes in the minuscule twitches on his face—anger, confusion, sadness, helplessness, guilt—he swallows. Karolina doesn’t realize Alex isn’t wearing his glasses until his hand goes to his face to push the missing glasses up the bridge of his nose. Even Alex looked surprised for a moment before finally sighing and letting his arms drop to his side. He looks back at Karolina, holding her gaze, his eyes desperately searching for something Karolina has no idea how to give. Then, Alex blurts out—

“I’m sorry.”

Karolina is about to ask what he means but Alex speaks first, evidently forcing the words out of his mouth. “I made a promise and I couldn’t keep it. I’m sorry.”

There’s an edge of desperation in his voice, laced with panic and regret, and this time, Karolina can see the tears welling in his eyes.

Karolina is about to ask what he means, when it hits her. Her nightmare, Alex’s words (Nico would die trying to protect you), becoming distorted (Nico died trying to protect you).

The words, Alex’s promise, hang over them uneasily. A conversation from a lifetime ago echoing in Karolina’s mind.

Our lives aren’t simple or safe but I want to make it safe enough so Nico doesn’t ever have to be scared that she’s lost you too.

“I promised to protect both of you, I couldn’t—” Alex cuts himself off. “This isn’t— I’m not—”

Karolina gives Alex time to compose himself. Not knowing what to say, she simply watches as he brings his hand up to his face to pinch the bridge of his nose. Alex inhales, shuddering, on the verge of tears, then he sighs.

“Please stop trying to get yourself killed, Kar.” Alex looks at Karolina helplessly. His voice is barely above a whisper, trembling, and hopelessly scared. Alex sounded like a terrified little kid. “I can’t— We can’t—”

Karolina winces. Looks away. “I’m sorry,” she says again. She’s not sure if she’s apologizing for having jeopardized herself over and over, or if she’s apologizing because she knows she can’t promise Alex to stop doing it.

“Karolina, we can’t lose you too. Let us help. You’re not the only one who’s—” We’re all grieving her. “Please.” Alex is searching her face for any hint that she understands. Karolina only nods mutely, not trusting herself to sound sincere. “Nico,” Alex begins to say, his voice cracking, “Nico wouldn’t want you to throw your life away like this. She—” he breaks off again, choking. Alex brings his hand up to wipe away his tears.

Karolina counts the seconds that pass before Alex speaks again; and when he does speak, his voice is calmer and more even.

“If you die,” he says, “If you wind up getting your self killed, Nico will have died for nothing.”

The words are like a knife to her chest, aching harsher than her bruised rib.

“You’re being cruel, Alex.”

“I’m only telling you the truth.”

Karolina has no idea how to reply because, fuck it, he’s right. He’s right.

Karolina was angry that Alex was right. She was angry with Nico for leaving her, and she’s angry with herself for feeling that way. But that was their truth now and Karolina had to deal with it. She was angry with Jonah for taking Nico away from her, for parading what he did over their heads. She was angry at their parents for ever colluding with Jonah and for complicating their lives. Karolina wanted to be a normal teenager. She wanted to worry about things most teenagers worried about. She didn’t want this. She didn’t want any of the pain pouring in and settling in her gut like concrete. She wanted Nico.

Once upon a time, Nico told her about Achilles and Patroclus and, fuck, she thought she understood what Nico had been talking about but she never fully realized the gravity behind those words until they’d become true for her. Nico’s fears became her reality and it wasn’t fucking fair to any of them.

Patroclus gets killed, and finally Achilles decides to fight. Everyone thinks it’s because he’s really mad at Hector and wants to avenge Patroclus, and he probably was, but that can’t be the only reason. I think Achilles was more angry at himself. I think Patroclus’s words probably haunted him. What was the point of being so powerful when he couldn’t even protect his people, his best friend? Homer called Patroclus someone Achilles loved above all other men and as much as his own life— and that was the person that he couldn’t save. Achilles went into that fight not really giving a shit about Agamemnon’s up-sized gifts. ‘Just let me fight,’ he says. Going home and living a long life be damned. He doesn’t care whether or not he dies, because he’s already dead anyway. He’s already lost Patroclus. I don’t think it was Achilles’s quest for honor or glory or whatever that doomed him. I think it was his love for Patroclus.

Chapter Text

“Hey, babe.”

Karolina’s eyes shoot wide open, head whipping towards the direction of the voice, “Nico?”

“Yeah,” she groans, plopping down beside Karolina and leaning against the other girl’s arm, trying to get warm. Why did early mornings always feel so cold and wet?

“What are you doing here?” Karolina asks, surprise coloring her voice, “I thought you went back to sleep.”

“Couldn’t go back to sleep without you,” Nico mumbles without opening her eyes.

I feel like I should be sleeping, Nico thinks. Seventy-five percent of her consciousness is off away in dreamland it’s almost a wonder how she hadn’t fallen off the roof trying to get to Karolina. She can’t even remember how she managed to drag herself out of the bed and all the way to the roof. Nico files ‘knowing-where-my-girlfriend-is-even-when-I’m-mostly-unconscious’ under her list of talents. 

Nico can feel Karolina looking at her, she smiles a little bit when she hears the fondness in Karolina’s voice. “You look like you’re about to drop dead,” she teases.

Still without opening her eyes, Nico pouts, “I feel like I’m about to drop dead.”

It felt like she should be dead. Nico is not a morning person. She was an I-can-stay-awake-until-the-morning person, but definitely not an I-like-to-wake-up-early-in-the-morning person. She groans again for effect, a loud and exaggerated sound that could put most zombies to shame. Nico is rewarded by the soft laughter that Karolina makes. Nico’s smile grows bigger despite how crappy and grumpy she felt. Her entire body felt sluggish and she was too scared to open her eyes because everything was just too bright (she wasn’t kidding about dropping dead, she felt tired as shit it wasn’t even funny). Nico could feel a headache teasing to bloom behind her eyes—nope, wait, no, there it is, a lovely fucking throb like Satan herself was knocking at her cranium—and her entire body felt like Old Lace decided to use her as a chew toy. 

“Did you have a nightmare?” Karolina asks, her voice comes soft as a feather that Nico almost doesn’t hear her. Karolina kisses the top of her head.

“Nah. I just missed you, s’all.”

And she did, Nico realized. She missed Karolina like they’ve been apart for the better part of forever. It felt as though a great distance had torn open between them  and they became utterly disconnected from each other. Nico feels this yawning emptiness, a sense of having had a piece of her soul ripped from her, even as Karolina sat there beside her.

“Why do you have to be solar powered, K?” Nico grumbles, trying to displace the discomfited pang in her gut with a joke.

“Probably because you kept calling me your ray of sunshine, so it finally came true?” Karolina’s tone is teasing, light. It makes Nico smile despite the groan that tumbles out of her lips. She tries to burrow herself further into Karolina, seeking more warmth from the cool morning. 

“Careful, Nico,” one of Karolina’s arms darts forward to steady herself, the other wraps around Nico. “You’ll knock us both over.” 

Ah, yes, there was that ever pressing problem of accidentally falling off of the roof. You can fly and I know you won’t drop me, is what Nico wanted to say but her tongue was in the mood to be ten times thicker than it usually was that all she managed to get out were unintelligible noises. Ugh, falling off a roof wouldn’t even be a problem if they were in bed.

And clearly, her girlfriend has just added mind-reading to her super powers because Karolina then asks, “Do you want to go back to our room?”

Or maybe it was just common sense?

Either way, at her words, Nico (with a lot of effort) extracts herself from the most comfortable shoulders in the world, cranes her neck, and cracks open an eye to peer at Karolina (goddesses, she knows she’s staring at Karolina, and Karolina was sunshine and rainbows personified, but why was it was so fucking bright?) 

“I want to,” Nico tells her, “but you need to do your photosynthesizing.”

Cool. Her tongue actually made the words sound like real words. Nico manages a lopsided grin before leaning back against the world’s-most-comfortable shoulders. Karolina sighs, not even trying to argue that she was meditating and not photosynthesizing (not that the argument was necessary in the first place because she wasn’t a plant). With her eyes still closed, Nico reaches out for one of Karolina’s hands (the one that wasn’t currently planted against the roof to ensure they weren’t going to needlessly fall off). Karolina meets her halfway and intertwines their fingers together. Arms feeling heavy, and her movements sluggish, Nico brings Karolina’s hand to her lips. “Thank you for being patient with me,” she whispers as she dropped their hands back to her lap.

“Of course,” Karolina squeezes Nico’s hand, “Always.”

A comfortable silence settles around them. Nico can feel the tenderness radiating off Karolina and seeping into her body, overcoming the pang of longing that was churning in her gut. The moment stretches an eternity and Nico finds herself pleasantly lost in Karolina’s presence. It’s a curious sensation, but Nico swears she can feel the world crawling to a halt.

“K?” she whispers, trying to fight off the drowsiness.

“Yes, Nico?”

“I really like you.”

“I know.” Even without looking at her, Nico could tell there was an impish grin plastered on Karolina’s face. 

Nico knew they shouldn’t have done a drunk Star Wars marathon last night (granted, her current lethargy  and banging headache should be the clearest evidence against staying up late binging alcohol). “You’re not allowed to pull a Han Solo on me,” the words come out slurred. “I haven’t even said ‘I love you’ yet.”

Karolina raises an eyebrow.

Wait. 

Nico sort of freezes. Panics.

She just said it, didn’t she? 

Holy fuck, she just said ‘I love you’ to Karolina. 

It counted even if the three words were a part of another sentence. The sentiment was the freaking same!

Fuck. Wait. Wait. Wait. Did Karolina say it back? Was she too shocked? Why wasn’t she replying? Did she reply? What if Nico didn’t hear her? Oh, crap, what if she said it too soon? Or too carelessly? What if Karolina didn’t— no, that’s absurd. There’s no way Karolina didn’t love her back, right?

Right?  

Holy flying fuck, what if— (wait, now that’s a curious image).

Damn it, now is not the time to think about flying fucks.

It is totally the time to think about flying fucks.

Fucking while flying? Flying and fucking? Totally appropriate things to think about after sort of saying ‘I love you’ to your girlfriend who just so happened to know how to fly.

Welcome to the mile high club, we did the do whilst flying not-onboard-an-aircraft. Unless you argue that my girlfriend as an aircraft, in which case I was totally riding h—

What the fuck was she saying?

Nico wasn’t panicking.

Of course not. 

She wasn’t panicking at all.

It wasn’t like she’d just blurted out, via mostly incoherent garbles, that she loved Karolina.

Well, she did.

Okay, so, Nico was sort of panicking.

She was panicking a lot.

Holy flying f—

She was not going there again.

Then came the dawning realization: either she was freaking out really hard or she was more tired than she originally thought because it felt like she just completely dissociated from her body. Nico couldn’t exactly feel her body. The sensation didn’t feel at all like she was numb or paralyzed. It was more like she was consciously trying to get her arms and legs and whichever body part that could wiggle to wiggle but they all seemed to be currently nonexistent. They weren’t not functioning. They just weren’t there. 

But, for whatever reason, she could feel exactly how much worse the pounding in her head had gotten. To top it all off, her nausea was worsened by the sensation of floating in nothingness. Nico felt like she knocked herself out so hard she turned into the living personification of a hangover.

How was she even still conscious? Vaguely conscious.

“Nico.”

She recognizes Karolina’s voice, tone heavy with worry and something else Nico couldn’t place. She tries to follow the sound of the voice but it felt so far away. She tries and fails to say Karolina’s name. Oh, right, personified hangovers didn’t have bodies that could produce sounds.

I love you. The three words echo over and over and over again, growing louder and more desperate with each iteration.

From out of the seeming nothingness, a soothing warmth reaches out for Nico as if it were trying to swathe her in its protective embrace. It suffuses the void in which Nico found herself in, pervading everything around her and overfilling her until she knew nothing else but the unmistakeable sensation of coming home.

Chapter Text

Nico’s eyes shoot wide open. It is as sudden an awakening as any. Her back arches away from the bed, she lurches forward with all the force of a wandering soul finding its long lost body and finally plunging back in place. Nico’s eyes have yet to focus and the dark spots swimming in her vision have yet to completely disappear; for now, the only thing she is surely aware of is the kaleidoscope of lights dancing before her. It’s Karolina, and she’s sure of this because there was no one else who could glow as such (Jonah has always been devoid of colors); and anyway, the warmth of Karolina’s presence (of the hand tightly wrapped around hers) is unmistakeable. Then, a bit more confounded by the dawning realization, Nico thinks, I’ve missed her.

I can’t believe you’re actually here. Relief crashes all around Karolina. The violent, guttural sound that Nico makes as she gasps awake sounded like the most beautiful music she’s ever heard—it was a sign of life—Nico is alive. Nico is alive - the thought echoes in her head, resounding rather than diminishing. Nico squeezes her hand like she knows exactly what Karolina is thinking. Karolina chokes on air, on the incoherent and disorganized words bubbling up her throat, and on her breathless, teary laughter. You’re alive. You’re okay.

This is real. Alex is staring at Nico like he has just witnessed a miracle (he has): eyes wide and wet and shining, lips parted, awe-struck. He feels lighter, he thinks, impossibly lighter. He is Atlas relieved, the heavens have been lifted off from his shoulders. From the corner of his eyes he can see Karolina glowing, brighter than ever, a rainbow made flesh. Even with his eyes trained on Nico, Alex could see all the color seeping back into Karolina’s skin; a wide grin comes to his face unbidden. We really found her.

Holy actual fuck. Gert goes from leaning (she twisted her ankle earlier) to sagging against Old Lace with visible relief. There is a smile on her face, wide and unclouded by grief or worries. For a moment she forgets that they’re deep in the heart of their parents’ (redacted: their enemies’) little kingdom, that there is still danger lurking in some turn or corner. Nico is finally safe, saved. And it’s nothing short of a miracle— even if she already knew Nico wasn’t dead, even if the whole point of this mission was to bring Nico home— fuck, I can’t believe we’re all coming home, and, damn it, Gert was going to fight tooth and nail to make sure they all were.

Old Lace, for her part, is also very visibly happy—tail wagging just so, bearing her sharp teeth in a gleeful grin—and not just because Gert is overfull with excitement and Old Lace is there to catch all of the spilling emotions, but because she too recognizes Nico’s return: the sheer reality of Nico being alive. Old Lace nuzzles Nico’s leg with unbearable gentleness seemingly out of place for an eleven-foot long, carnivorous predator. She hasn’t stopped purring happily. 

It’s adorable, Molly thinks as she tears her eyes away from Old Lace and Nico, to let her gaze settle on Karolina. She’s feeling more than a little winded, but seeing the way Karolina’s entire demeanor brightens and relaxes makes her thrum with more energy than she ever thought was possible. It isn’t just relief, Molly realizes with a start, but also a sense of security that’s blooming in her gut. The world (their world, in particular) is far from okay or fixed but— But Nico’s here. We didn’t lose her and Karolina’s going to be okay and we’re not going to lose her too and and and and and and We’re going to be okay. Her thoughts are a jumbled mess but the gentle warmth that settles across her skin is a constant. Chase slings an arm around her shoulder, she throws her arm around his waist. They hold each other like that, each one supporting the other and both shaking.

Chase is crying. He’s laughing and he’s crying and he’s at least half sure he sounds a little bit mad but that’s okay. He’s just so fucking happy and utterly relieved and gods it’s so nice to cry about something nice for a change. Chase feels giddy enough he won’t mind giving Jonah a (really, really, really hard) pat on the back if he ever enters the room in the next thirty-seconds. He feels invincible enough he wouldn’t mind hurling a fistigon into Jonah’s face instead of actually using it as he’s supposed to. He lets out a whoop that fills the room, it’s accentuated by the pained groans of Pride goons and followed by his friends’ shaky laughter. Only Karolina remains silent, deathly still (but bursting with life), and held in awed shock.

“Feels like,” the words come out slowly, hoarse, pained but edged with amusement, “I missed a lot.”

It’s only until Karolina hears Nico that all the nervous energy welling in her chest comes out, starting out as a choked sob, then melting into shaky laughter. It gains momentum, louder yet still tearful and breathless. Nico can’t tear her eyes away from the way Karolina’s hair cascades behind her as her head is thrown back in careless laughter. Her eyes roam and devour every single detail. The way Karolina’s shoulders are shaking, the way her nose is scrunched up, the crinkles by her eyes; try as she might, Nico can’t see past the look of utter awe painted on her girlfriend’s face, actualized further by her body language. 

Karolina feels wonderfully free and giddy with relief as she finally closes the small distance that separates her from Nico. She sweeps the other girl towards her, cups her face, leans down, and lets their forehead touch. 

A calm quiet descends upon them. It is a silence unbothered by externality. It is a quiescence that emerges from within and stretches to without to encompass everything in its soothing stillness. It is in this moment of eternity that Karolina whispers to Nico:

“I love you.”

And pauses. 

Karolina does not kiss her, not right away. She waits, looking into Nico’s eyes and savoring the fact that she can, that the warmth beneath her fingers are real and she has not lost Nico (not yet and, hopefully, not for a long time).

“Before this,” Nico begins to say, voice just above a whisper, “I dreamt of saying I love you.”

Karolina can’t help the way her eyebrow arches as she pulls away just a bit. She ignores the chuckles coming from their friends. “Should I let you go back to slee—”

She doesn’t get to finish the question because Nico is already grasping at the lapels of her jacket and pulling her close and kissing her.

“I love you,” Nico tells Karolina for the first time. “I love you too,” she says again, and this time Karolina’s the one leaning in and kissing her; lips crash together like waves to the shore. 

Someone clears their throat. “We need to get out of here.” 

Nico groans. Karolina laughs and so does everyone else.

“Did you really need to ruin the moment, Wilder?” Nico’s words are dripping sarcasm but there’s a fond glint in her eyes as she looks at Alex.

“Unfortunately,” Alex rolls his eyes. He’s smiling. “We promise to give your bedroom a wide berth for an entire week.”

Karolina can feel her face reddening as she helps Nico off the pod.

“That’s not necessary,” she mutters just as Nico is saying, “You’re only saying that because you can hear us from your room.”

“Nico!” Karolina squeaks at the same time Alex murmurs, “My poor ears are traumatized.”

“You don’t hear me complaining about Gert and Chase,” Molly says under her breath, to which the two accused respond with indignant sputtering of their own: “Molly!” and “We’re not as bad as them!”

And then they’re all laughing (Old Lace making happy noises of her own). Karolina intertwines her fingers with Nico's and squeezes her hand.

It was good to be together again.

Chapter Text

“How did you know I was alive?”

There was a pause, pregnant with uneasiness and hesitation.

“I didn’t.” Another pause, shorter than a beat, “Alex did.”

“Alex?” The surprise is evident.

“He didn’t know exactly, he just didn’t want to believe that you were—” Karolina chokes before she could spit out the word ‘dead,’ opting instead to say, “I guess, maybe, clinging to some hope you were alive was a bit too morbid for me, you know?”

Nico places her hand gently on Karolina’s fidgeting fingers, “It’s okay, I understand.”

Karolina stills completely at Nico’s touch, there’s a pause, long enough to stretch to infinity, before the tension drains away from her body. Karolina slumps forward, head resting against Nico’s shoulder.

“I missed you, Nico,” Karolina’s words felt like a breathless caress against her exposed skin, there’s a wetness accompanying it, “so fucking much.”

“I’m sorry you had to.”

“I’m sorry I was too stupid to realize my father wasn’t aiming to kill.” The raw bitterness with which the words were spat out comes as a shock to Nico, colder than iced water on her skin.

“Hey, no,” Nico’s hands come cup Karolina’s face in them, she brings their faces close together, eyes searching the other pair for understanding, “Goddess, no, babe. Being blinded by grief doesn’t make you stupid.”

“I know— I just—” Karolina jerks away as the images flash before her eyes: Jonah lifting a device that looked like a low-budget sci-fi gun. The gun lighting up. Jonah pulling the trigger. Nico jumping in the way of the beam. Nico disappearing. Jonah’s smug expression when he tells them to give up while they’ve only lost one person. Karolina’s angry at Jonah for tricking her but she’s more frustrated with herself for not realizing, of course, he wouldn’t kill his own daughter. Maybe he’d abduct her and brainwash her. Maybe he’d even implant false memories. But he wouldn’t kill her. He wouldn’t— damn it. She should’ve, “Nico, I just wish I—”

“I’m here now.” The three words come, a powerful and soothing salve against Karolina’s still aching wounds. “Wish for something for the future.”

“A date!” Karolina blurts out before she can think about it. Nico looked amused, and Karolina offers a sheepish smile.

“We’ve gone on several dates?”

“A proper one, Nico,” Karolina explains softly, leaning in again, “When things settle down.”

“And if it doesn’t?” Underneath the teasing is a note of anxiety that leads Karolina to stroke Nico’s cheek with her thumb. Her girlfriend leans into the touch.

“Go on a date with me anyway.”

Nico’s lips quirk into a half smile. “Okay.”

Karolina grins and, for a moment, Nico thinks it’s the brightest she’s ever seen Karolina. Then Karolina’s kissing her and everything really does explode into a medley of lights behind her eyelids as they flutter close. The kiss was sweet despite the saltiness of their tears.

They pull away and settle on their bed. Their bed. Karolina didn’t miss how hard the sofa had been those nights Nico was gone.

“Hey, Nico?”

“Hm?”

“I fucking hate the Iliad.”

Chapter Text

“I can’t believe multiple universes actually exist,” Gert says excitedly after Nico and Karolina recounted their adventure.

“Maybe it was just a weird side effect from Nico’s spell,” came Alex’s skeptical response. His brows are furrowed, already deep in thought before he can finish his sentence or hear Chase's resigned sigh as he mutters, “I can’t believe our parents are still assholes though."

“Wait!" Molly suddenly exclaims, her eyes shining with the dawning of a new idea, "Who do you think would win a race between the two Old Laces?”

“Rowr,” answers Old Lace with a determined grin. The growling purr being the best approximation of Obviously, me that a deinonychus can make. Molly turns to her with a grin, nodding as if to agree.

After a while, Nico got tired of fielding their questions. She looks up to nowhere in particular, sending a prayer to whichever goddess was listening to save her from her friends' curiosity. Alex pulls her back with another jab about her magic somehow malfunctioning she was sure he only said to antagonize her. Instead of answering she only glares at him.

Then, inwardly groaning, she remembers Karolina excusing herself, distracted and effectively abandoning her to their friends' pestering. Nico can't be blame for the way her brain short-circuited when Karolina suddenly kissed her. She didn't realize what the taller girl was saying until she was already out of the room.

"Guys, I'm tired. Let's continue this tomorrow." Nico tries for dismissive, but she can hear the undertone of whining in her voice. "Anyway, I need to check on Karolina."

Despite the gang's protest, and Molly, Chase and (not even weirdly enough) Old Lace's pouts and puppy dog eyes, Nico speed-walks out of the room with one last promise of "Tomorrow!"

Nico doesn't expect the very loaded question Karolina throws her way when she stepped into their room. Compared to that, the interrogation she'd just walked out was cakewalk.

“Are you worried, Nico?”

A simple question laden with meaning and anxiety.

Nico wipes the deer-in-the-headlights look on her face, turns around and closes the door. For a moment, she remains standing there with her back against Karolina.

Was she worried?

Nico takes a deep breath, fortifying herself. Slowly, she turns around, “About… them?”

“Yes." Karolina chews at her bottom lip, eyes shining with worry.

Nico shrugs, her answer noncommittal for now. Karolina looks disappointed by her lack of a better response. To avoid her girlfriend's downcast expression, she walks toward their dresser and begins methodically removing her accessories, laying each piece on top.

If Nico is worried, it’s only because she cares too much not to. She cares about her future with Karolina, and she doesn't want to overthink what could have happened to them if certain circumstances had been different. She fidgets uselessly with the ring on her index finger. She thinks about that other world, those other versions of themselves. There are a thousand things running through her head, worries that are turning her guts into mush.

After a long moment of silence, Karolina speaks again.

“Nico,” she nudges, “What if—”

That What if crashes into Nico harder than all her thoughts combined, and when she cuts Karolina off, her response is forceful. “They don’t matter.”

Karolina watches Nico's shoulder rise and fall as she sighs. She can only imagine the expression on the other girl's face.

Finally, Nico removes the ring, tosses it on the dresser, and faces Karolina. Her expression is bright and determined.

They don't matter. It’s more an answer to the voices in Nico's head than an answer to the question she knew Karolina was about to ask.

"We're not them." Nico states without faltering, walking towards Karolina with slow, sure steps. "Their problems aren't ours to worry about."

"I know, but—" Karolina cuts herself off before she can finish the sentence. She isn't naïve. She knows things could have gone differently for them, but it didn't. There was no point in agonizing over things that didn't happen.

Nico, it seemed, was thinking the same thing.

"So, maybe there are worlds out there where I don't choose you," she begins to say, tone harsh and expression pained. "Or you choose someone else. Who cares?"

Nico stops in front of Karolina, kneeling in front of her. She takes Karolina's hands in hers, gripping it like a lifeline. Karolina holds her just as tightly.

"Those worlds don't matter, because in this one I did choose you," Nico continues shakily. "And in this world, I'm the one you love," her gaze softens a bit. A crooked half smile finds its way to her lips as she reaches for Karolina's hand. "I don't care how many worlds are out there."

"Neither do I," Karolina whispers, a hopeful smile spilling onto her face.

"Our life isn't peachy and all, but whatever happens we'll deal with it together." Nico bows her head and kisses Karolina's knuckles.

"Together." Karolina echoes as Nico meets her gaze. She takes Nico in, the way her expression is tender but her eyes are alight with fierce protectiveness. She leans forward, pressing her forehead against Nico. An eternity passes in that moment.

"You know I would always choose you, right?" Nico asks, voice soft and nearly pleading. "There would be nothing but regret for me in a world where I don't."

For one last time, Karolina lets herself think about Karrie. Some other me living with what she's got. Karolina doesn't doubt the love Karrie has for Julie. She saw this profound sort of tenderness in Karrie's eyes whenever she would look at Julie, or talk about her. Karrie loves Julie. This is fact. What isn't any less true is that Karrie loved Nico too, or loved her still in her own way. A longing that refused to be acknowledged wholly. 

Karolina sighs and banishes all thoughts of the other world from her mind. Nico's right, Karrie's regrets, if there were any, don't belong to her.

Still, Karolina thought it needed to be said. Because Nico gave her piece, she should tell hers too.

"Even if there were worlds where I loved other people, or worlds where we parted ways," she says softly, but with no less certainty, "I believe you would always be my greatest love."

Karolina pulls Nico up, and towards her. They fall together on the bed in a clumsy embrace, they laugh and kiss and embrace some more.

They end up in another universe because an idiot decided he was Michael Crichton's demented heir and literally brought back a fucking tyrannosaurus rex that's somehow too big to be normal (as far as genetically raising a t-rex can be normal) and without any of the forethought to bond it to someone sane...  or anyone really. Just one, gigantic assed, unhinged t-rex that would give even Godzilla a pause.

The particular circumstances of how exactly the fucking t-rex ended up wreaking havoc in the streets of downtown New York is a blur. It's somewhere between, "obviously it got too big and the facility could no longer contain it" and "it just appeared out of fucking nowhere." Nico knew that life on the run with serial killer parents part of a murderous cult didn't particularly spell "long life, died of old age in her sleep," but she never thought she could die at the ripe old age of barely-nineteen as dinosaur chow.

She has no idea where everyone is. Last she saw they were threatening Insane Dollar Store Michael Crichton and now she's alone with Karolina, out of breath in the worst possible way, and running faster than she ever thought was possible in her attire.

Nico prays to every deity that could be listening that her friends were working to find a way to reverse engineer the whole shit show before doing the next most logical thing she could think of: opening a portal to whichever place that was currently t-rex free. She looks at Karolina one last time. The other girl nods at her, determined expression set on her face. Hands clasped tightly together, they jump through the portal, hoping for the best.

Lo and behold, welcome to the t-rex free zone.

Also, lo and behold, Karolina kissing another girl.

Nico preferred the t-rex.

Nico has no idea who the girl kissing Karolina is. Her hair is long and blonde, but not as long as Karolina's and definitely a shade darker. Nico has to look beside her to make sure Karolina (her Karolina) is still beside her (which is stupid considering the fact that they’re literally holding hands). Karolina (still Nico’s Karolina) for her part, looks just as astounded and maybe even… horrified?

The strangled sound that comes out of Karolina’s throat is what finally tears the two lovers (?) away from each other. (Really, as if the sound of New York screaming over a fucking t-rex, said t-rex screeching like it swallowed an over-sized banshee, or a portal tearing through space-time wasn’t loud enough.)

“Nico?” says Karolina 2.0.

“Karolina?” says unknown blonde girl.

“Karolina?” repeats Karolina 2.0.

“Unknown blonde girl?” Nico offers because she wants to know who the fuck was just kissing not-her-Karolina.

“Julie,” answers no-longer-unknown blonde girl, “Julie Power,” she adds, like it should mean something. It doesn’t, Nico thinks, but maybe it will, maybe they’ll meet this other girl. Maybe she— Fuck, no. Nico shakes the thought out of her head. Maybe she should've made a Shrek joke instead of asking for Julie's name.

"Right, hello," Nico purses her lips and decides to throw subtlety and tact out the window. "So you two are..." she doesn't bother finishing the sentence, instead resorting to gesturing with her free hand.

“Julie’s my girlfriend, Nico,” replies thankfully-not-her Karolina. Something about the way she said that, maybe the volume of her voice or the inflection, sounded weird to Nico's ears. The girl who just spoke was technically Karolina and yet she's never heard her name sound more foreign in someone else's mouth.

She sees Karolina stiffening beside her from the corner of her eyes. The taller girl squeezes her hand. "And Nico's my girlfriend." There's a scowl in her voice that makes Nico smile. At least her girlfriend sounded just as indignant as she felt.

K2 seems taken aback by the undercurrent of vehemency in the other girl's statement. Nico can see her expression shatter into something almost akin to jealousy. Almost.

"Right," Julie says, visibly uncomfortable. K2 doesn't move beside her, face completely shuttering and shoulders tensing.

Karolina clears her throat, feeling awkward. Weirdness was their constant companion but even this seemed more bizarre compared to the rampaging t-rex they just left behind. Julie's face contorts into one of distrust and... something else? Just a hint of curiosity, Nico observes, mars her features. And there, blazing in her eyes is an evident surge of possessiveness (or maybe protectiveness?) and she's suddenly (though subtly) in front of Karolina (her Karolina). Still more interesting are the emotions flashing in K2's eyes. There's something there bordering regret and maybe... yearning?

Before Nico can muse any further, Julie pipes up, “So, who are you two again?”

“Nico.” Did she have to be such a smartass about it?

“Karolina.” Okay, at least Karolina has her back on the smartassery.

K2 rolls her eyes. “That much is obvious, we mean—”

“Hopefully, we're from another version of your universe," Nico interrupts, the words coming out of her mouth were a ball of anxiousness that she needed to get rid of. She looks between Julie and K2. Julie seems to be sizing her up while K2 seems to find the other Karolina very interesting (that or she's doing everything to avoid Nico's gaze).

Nico clears her throat, "Just to be clear," she says, catching K2's attention, "The two of us, we've never..." she wags her fingers between the two of them.

Nico isn't sure if it's her imagination or if there really were a split second where Julie's expression darkened.

Meanwhile, K2 shakes her head, "Never," and there it was again. In that almost-a-sigh response was that hint of regret and yearning. Nico wants to ask but knew it was inappropriate (and maybe there was something about her bias informing her observation) and, anyway, before the question can solidify in her mind, she's overcome by a sense relief that has her exclaiming, "Thank fuck."

Karolina makes a noise at the back of her throat that Nico reads as the taller girl taking offense. She looks at Karolina with a sheepish shrug and said, "What, I thought we broke up."

"Hey!" The offense turns into alarm as Karolina tugs at her hand, more obviously indignant and definitely scowling this time. She leans in and whispers in a voice that was both quiet and harsh, "Don't be stupid. There's no way I'd break up with you."

Nico wanted to argue the point just because there was no way anyone could see the future and maybe she'll muck things up somewhere down the line—but fuck. She doesn't like the thought of that. She'd fight to be by Karolina's side. She'd fight to remain worthy of her love everyday. There was no way in hell she was mucking up her relationship with Karolina just because the Nico of this world had somehow been dumb enough to let her slip through her fingers.

Karolina sounded like she's on the verge of panicking, and she is panicking. She's just utterly, freaking confused because she's staring at a girl who, by all means, is her and she's dating a girl who isn't Nico. It's weird and it's terrifying. Karolina feels as though she's suffocating. What if she loses Nico? (Again?) What if, what if, what if...

Obviously, it's not impossible that they'd drift apart somewhere down the line.  When that happens they could fall in love with someone new. That was a reality Karolina never thought to think about. That she and Nico could break up and, if they do, the world would simply keep turning. Eventually, she would have to move on and so would Nico. And blah blah blah

But fuck. She doesn't want to fall out of love with Nico. The mere suggestion of it is freaking horrifying. Karolina doesn't want to entertain thought, and, and, and,

And suddenly, Nico is pulling her away. She thinks she may have heard her say something like, "Excuse us for a moment," but Karolina isn't too sure.

When they're more than an earshot away, though not completely out of view from other-Karolina and Julie, Nico pulls her down for a kiss. It's desperate and calming all at once. And, if Nico's being honest, just a way to somehow flex at the other couple.

Eh, she doesn't know. Just felt like she really needed to do that somehow. When Nico pulls away she's grinning and Karolina looks a lot calmer.

"They're not us." Nico tells the other girl firmly. "We're not them."

The fierce tenderness in Nico's gaze makes Karolina relax completely. And, that's it. She doesn't need to say anything else anymore. The look on her face is enough to reassure Karolina that they're going to be alright. Nico kisses her again, this time more gently. There is a sureness there that Karolina basks in. She believes it.

No matter what happens, they're going to be okay.

When Nico meets Nico 2.0 she ascertains two things. Firstly, this universe's version of her is damned amazing too. Unsurprisingly, of course. Well, except for the part where she's not dating Karolina. That part was crap. And that's the second thing. The whole not-dating-Karolina thing obviously sucked for the other Nico. You'd have to be blind not to recognize even a hint of the pain dancing behind the girl's eyes when she watches Julie and Karolina together. Nico can't blame other her, really. Not being with Karolina is the worst feeling ever. Seeing her with someone else must have felt even worse.

The two Nicos bond. Teaching each other spells the other person didn't know, trying to outdo each other with their staff twirling like they were rivals in the Wiccan Baton (Staff?) Twirling Competition. They talk about each other's worlds and the differences and similarities to be found. Nico observes how N2 dances around the Karolina question. She asks every question but that (the girlfriend question), like she's trying to figure out the story through the surrounding details instead of tackling it at its core. It makes Nico's heart ache for her double but she doesn't press.

Instead they decide to annoy the ever living shite outta Chase. If they'd somehow, nearly singed off all of, and Nico quotes, Chase's "silky, smooth golden locks," then she wasn't going to divulge how exactly that happened. Only that she and her double got too competitive about showing off their respective skills.

Their bonding lasts all of one hour. One. Hour. Somehow, in the span of sixty minutes, the two Karolinas had managed to find identical articles of clothing and somehow... decided to practice talking in sync because they could hear, according to them, the obvious differences in their speech patterns. And, afterwards, copying what they considered to be each other's difference in mannerisms and gestures. As if any of that had been particularly different when they were, technically, the same people.

The two girls practiced on Julie... because of course, Nico thinks, dripping with sarcasm, who else would know Karolina (or at least one version of her) the best?

It was incredibly uncanny to say the least. Like they just discovered there was a Karolina Dean Impersonation Contest and decided to join because... why not? What a... bizarre use of give-or-take three thousand and six hundred seconds.

Whatever gave them the idea was beyond Nico but at least it was

"Better than burning my head off!"

(Cue Chase screaming as he exited the room, still evidently mad about his precious, mostly untouched hair. Honestly, Nico doesn't remember Chase being this vain?)

Molly enjoyed playing guessing games with the two Karolinas. Gert walked in the room, saw what was up and just noped the fuck outta there because, "I have a headache. I don't need this."

It all boiled down to the two Nicos because, it turned out, this had been the two Karolina's plan all along.

Well, fine. That's fair. They're the only other person with a twin to test. So...

Nico, the one that belonged to the universe they were currently in, was the first to be tested.

She did atrociously, if her frustrated yells (which could still be heard from where Nico was lounging) were anything to go by. She stomped out of the room to fetch her double, to take her to where the Guess the Karolina Dean contest was happening.

The two Karolina's bonded over triumphantly confusing everyone. Even Julie would get confused if she stopped paying attention long enough. N2's frustration was entertaining to watch and either they managed to thoroughly confused her or the girl really was that bad at guessing games.

The two Karolina's were entertained and Julie felt somewhat smug about it. She figured the other Nico would be the same if her double's attempt was anything to go by.

She was proven wrong because, eventually, Nico walks in, herded by her still grumbling twin. Nico ignores her grumbling, eyes flitting back and forth between the two girls. She says, simply, "Karolina."

The two girls, in perfect and uncanny unison, greets her but Nico doesn't even falter, barely pays attention to her double's bitterly muttered "good luck." She simply walks towards one of them, softly greeting her with a "Hey, babe," and pulls her down to kiss her.

Julie's heart starts speeding up in her chest, thudding against her ribcage in a desperate frenzy to be set free. She hates the way jealousy and panic washes over her. Suddenly she doesn't care if Nico was dating her own universe's Karolina because one of those girls was still her girlfriend and if Nico mistakenly kissed her girlfriend then—

Karolina is kissing her back! The alarm bells are clanging in Julie's brain. It's like she's been submerged underwater and the only thing she's aware of is the blood in her ears and the visceral way her heart is thumping against her chest. Despite all of her thoughts calling for her to rip the two apart, Julie remained rooted to the spot, eyes glued on Karrie's face. (And it has to be Karrie, she thinks with some desperation. Because if it isn't then...) She doesn't know how to read the expression twisting and churning there. Julie isn't sure she wants to know.

She registers the vaguest sense of hurt and dread crawling up her spine.

The kiss breaks. The Karolina who'd just been kissed looked stunned and flushed.

Julie thinks she hears Nico say, "I'm going to get some juice," but she can't be sure because it all suddenly seemed absurd. Juice? She watched the unkissed Karolina watching Nico walk out the room and before she can register what she was feeling in that moment the other Nico, who was still in the room, suddenly blurts out—

"Holy fuck." 

And, really, that's about as articulate as Nico can get.

She’s impressed by the sheer audacity of her double but she’s also mildly horrified because what if Nico had gotten it wrong? Not only will she have kissed Karrie in front of Julie (which in itself is already pretty bad), she will have done so in front of her own girlfriend as well. The thought swells and explodes in her mind and suddenly Nico finds herself tracing the face of the girl her double had just kissed.

Her cheeks are flushed prettily and her lips are parted in obvious surprise. Her eyes are glued to the doorway the other goth had just walked through. There is fire there and satisfaction. And the only thing Nico can coherently process is: this, this is how Karrie looks like when she's been kissed. Thoroughly and by someone she loves.

The moment her gaze lands on Karrie is the moment she knew.

The thought doesn't fully materialize in her brain until she looks at Karrie who seemed just as stunned.

It's a brief moment, a mere drop in the vast expanse of time but when her gaze falls on Karrie (and she knows it is Karrie this time, no more lingering doubts), she sees fear painted there. Fear of what, she doesn't know. But in that split second, it hits her, that blooming recognition of something she had been terrified of naming. And now it was trying to burst to the surface, her attempts to stamp it down be damned, teeming with a pain so keen she felt physically suffocated.

Nico's gaze remained locked with Karrie's. From the corner of her eyes, she sees the other Karolina bring her fingers to her lips. She is more than hyper-aware of how breathless and awestruck the girl sounds when she whispers, "She knew."

And, now, Nico thinks it's utterly absurd how the two girls could have fooled her. Because now, now she sees it, the minute details that tell her who Karrie is and who she isn't. 

Nico, with all the conviction she didn't feel before, declares. "Of course, she knew."

Karrie's eyes widen just a fraction, still unable to look away.

Nico pretends she can't feel Julie's eyes burning holes through her head. She doesn't care if her expression gives away the confused turmoil of regret and yearning wrecking her. The only thing that mattered in that moment was Karrie, and the way Nico felt reality shift and reorient around her and towards her.

Finally, Nico tears her gaze away from Karrie, resolutely avoiding Julie as she addresses Karolina. "I'm gonna go congratulate your girlfriend for saving face for all the Nico Minorus in the universe."

She tries to sound flippant, like she's talking about Nico guessing right at her first attempt. But really, who was she trying to fool?

Nico hovers in the hallway leading to the kitchen, just out of view from the doorway. She doesn't know what to say, or if there's anything to say at all. She's one part overwhelmed and another part incredulous. The last thing she expected when she woke up today was experiencing a paradigm shift that would make her entirely off-kilter. That's on her, really. With the life she has, she should've expected at least one existential crisis per month.

That the month was ending with barely anything truly life-threatening should've been the clue.

Of course there's a version of her out there brilliant enough to accidentally cast a universe jumping spell, and end up turning everything she knew upside down.

Regret and yearning. Nico can deal with that. They've always been there even if she'd refused to admit they existed. What she doesn't know how to deal with is the jealousy snaking its way around her throat. It's a disgusting, acid emotion she has no right to feel.

So, what if she can't kiss Karrie the way the other version of her could kiss Karolina?

She had her chance and she blew it worst than Chase with one of his more chaotic inventions.

Nico wonders, then, if the other her even knew how easy she could have lost Karolina. She wonders how close Nico had come to that moment, if she ever did at all.

"I'm running out of orange juice here, Minoru." Nico startles out of her reverie. It was odd hearing the faux annoyance in her own-other voice. 

Nico sighs and shakes her head, finally stepping into the kitchen. There's a small, half smile ghosting the corner of her lips. "Sorry. I was trying to come into terms with how dumb I was."

"I bet." There's humor in her tone, but her expression was anything but. This other-world version of her looks thoughtful, nearly knowing. Nico thinks she ought to feel uncomfortable, but she doesn't. She's too tired. And anyway, how could she hide from herself?

"How did you know?"

"Know what?" Her twin asks and takes a sip of juice. "To kiss the right girl? Or that I loved Karolina?"

Nico's breath hitches in throat, her posture goes rigid despite her best attempts to remain unaffected. She doesn't reply for a moment. This almost-but-not her waits patiently, lazily swirling the remaining orange juice in her glass. Finally, Nico sighs. "The second one."

There's a twitch of an almost smile on her double's lips that she hides behind her last sip of juice. She hums, then, "I had my hang ups about Alex. I was sure I still wanted him until I wasn't."

"But you still love him." 

"Yeah. But not in the way I thought I did."

"So, what happened?"

"We had a big fight. I was furious with Alex. I felt betrayed. I think that was the moment the illusion shattered." Nico watches this mirror image of her gesturing as she speaks, sounding almost bored. She's silent for a moment, pensive. "Wanting Alex was easy, simple. A feeling, a memory I could cling to.

"It was different with Karolina." She pauses, expression growing fond. She's smiling, gaze far away, when she says, "We kissed."

We kissed not she kissed me. Nico thinks, with a pang, that that's the fundamental difference for the two of them. "That's how you knew?" She asks. To her surprise, the other Nico shakes her head.

"Not then. Not yet. We didn't really get to talk about it. We kissed, and then I almost lost her." Her expression turns grim, she purses her lips and takes a deep breath. It's evident the memory haunts her even now. "I didn't realize how much I cared about her, how much I could care until I almost lost her."

The other goth looks at Nico, searching for understanding on face. "She was always there, you know? Even when we weren't talking, she was always there. She's Karolina Dean. Even when you don't want to be, you can't help but be aware of her. And she'd always been this bright spot in the crowd, you know? Way before she discovered her powers. The thought of losing her forever terrified me."

Nico nods, looks away. "I get it."

It's weird, watching someone who looks exactly like you talk about a life you've never lived. Painful too. 

"I know you do."

Nico is itching to get back to her own world. It's only been two days but she's already terribly home-world sick. She doesn't regret kissing Karolina the way she did. One, it's her girlfriend. Two, she's still irrationally bothered by the existence of Julie Power. And, three, well, why not? She likes kissing Karolina. So, no, she doesn't regret doing it even if she does feel a bit sorry for the can of worms she unexpectedly opened up.

Julie and Karrie have gone missing (they're still somewhere in the house, at the very least in the general vicinity, she just doesn't know where).

Nico 2.0 has a profoundly miserable expression on her face. 

Really, she didn't know kissing her girlfriend would end up rocking somebody else's world but... hey.

Here they are.

It's unsurprising how relieved she felt when they finally discover a spell that would bring them back to their own world. Nico tries her best to pretend like she's not aware of the wide berth everyone has been giving Julie and Karrie. Meanwhile, the other her is obviously doing her best to pretend like her attention is entirely spent on making sure the spell doesn't go awry.

Julie is missing when the portal opens. Before they stepped through, Karrie pulls Nico aside to talk to her. Karolina looked curious, but stays by the portal just out of earshot. (Nico definitely notices the other her avoiding Karrie the entire time.)

"How did you know?" Karrie asks, expression intense and gaze so searching that Nico feels like squirming.

Talk about dèjà vu.

"You mean how did I know I was kissing my girlfriend and not some random girl?"

Karrie winces at that. Nico admits she could've phrased that better, maybe a bit gentler.

Karrie just shakes her head and sighs, "What gave me away?"

Nico shrugs, "You don't look at me the same way she does."

Blessedly, thankfully, by the time they return to their world the t-rex has been dealt with. The only thing they had to contend with was everyone's panic over their disappearance, the initial distrust that they may be imposters, and then all the interrogation, and yadda yadda yadda

And finally, they’re under the sheets, cuddling, facing each other and 

“How did you know I was me?” Karolina asks, marveling at the way the shadows dance against Nico’s cheeks.

"I keep getting asked that." Nico says with a chuckle. She reaches towards Karolina, brushing her fingers gently against the other girl's cheek and then leaning closer to kiss her. "How could I not?" She kisses Karolina again, this time on the side of her mouth. "I'd always know it was you."

“I know,” Karolina whines, mostly to tease Nico into answering, “But how?”

“Because when you look at me,” Nico begins explaining, trying for nonchalance and entirely unable to keep herself from grinning. “I feel safe and loved.”

“That sounds corny,” Karolina says with her nose scrunched up, grateful for the dim lights because of the blush now painted on her face.

“Okay,” Nico rolls her eyes, “Fine. You had that adorable little half smile on your face that’s uniquely you,” then, grinning wider, she adds, “The one I know you reserve just for me.”

“That’s so presumptuous.” Karolina huffs (nevertheless knowing that Nico was probably right).

“But true.” 

Despite knowing the evident reason for the difference, Karolina still chooses to muse over a moot point. Empathically saying, “Karrie and I are literally the same person,”

“But she’s not the girl who loves me,” Nico nudges her, “you are.”

“I am. I do,” Karolina nods, a goofy grin makes its way to her lips, “I love you very much.”

“And that’s why I’d recognize you in a sea of Karolinas,” Nico murmurs softly, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. “Because when I call your name you’ll look at me and when I meet your gaze, it’s going to feel like coming home.”

Chapter Text

It starts like this: very innocently. 

As usual when Nico wakes up, Karolina is no longer in bed. Even with her sleep-addled brain, Nico finds this unsurprising. Karolina was probably already out meditating under the (still rising) sun—or so Nico thought, about to settle in and go back to sleep. However, it becomes clear soon enough that this isn’t the case, because the next thing she knows, her girlfriend has placed a sweet kiss against her cheek and is telling her good morning.

The kiss knocks Nico’s brain a degree more awake than it had been a few seconds ago. Meanwhile, her heart stutters in her chest. One beat, then another. Nico wonders, silly smile forming on her lips, if Karolina would ever stop affecting her in such a manner.

Fondness washes over Nico, followed by confusion; both emotions having been brought about by her girlfriend’s presence in the room. Sleepily, she asks Karolina if it’s already late, thinking that maybe she’d woken up later than she had previously thought and it was already time for breakfast.

Karolina’s response passes over Nico’s head, hearing her voice and the affection lacing it but not precisely her words. So, for good measure, Nico tries to get out of bed, becoming entangled with their blanket as she sits down, tipping forward against Karolina. The other girl catches her, shaking with quiet laughter. 

Karolina wraps one arm around Nico’s waist while her other hand reaches out to brush Nico’s hair away from her face. “You’re always adorable in the morning.”

Nico scoffs, burying her head against Karolina’s shoulder, “I’m always adorable.”

Without getting up, she looks at Karolina through bleary eyes, enjoying the sight. Karolina is beautiful, always beautiful—whether she was carefree and laughing or crushed and crying, whether they were arguing or fighting for their lives or sharing a moment of peace—there simply wasn’t a time when Karolina didn’t look beautiful to Nico. But there was something about the early morning, with its soft and golden light and its lulling quiescence, that somehow painted Karolina softer even as the gentleness served as a contrast to make Karolina’s fierceness shine through.

Karolina is breathtaking, plain and simple. Nico wasn’t a morning person but she would gladly greet the early morn if only to watch Karolina rising with the sun.

Nico admires Karolina, messy hair and husky voice and all, “I like you in the morning too,” she whispers softly, lips turning at the corners.

“Just in the morning?” Karolina teases, grins.

“Always,” and after a pause, adds, “I love you always.”

Nico’s smile transforms into a full and loopy grin when she sees Karolina’s expression melting into tenderness. Suddenly she’s held in awe by Karolina’s eyes, which were bright like the sunlit sky at dawn. Karolina takes Nico’s face into her hands, leans forward, and places a gentle kiss against her forehead. “I love you too, Nico.”

(They say those words a lot nowadays. It helps that they’d almost been robbed of the opportunity to have done so. Even if they weren’t, the first instance they’d utter those words had shattering, and the tide that came afterwards was unstoppable. I love you. I love you. I love you. It never fails to make either girls fill as though the sun had shown its face, unabashed and shining in all its glory for them, or as though they’d been lit by a blazing wildfire from within.)

There’s a pause and Nico feels something distinctly shifting in the air.

Karolina places another gentle kiss, this time on the corner of Nico’s lips. It’s a question, Nico knows, because Karolina’s aware of Nico’s reservations about kissing before she’s able to brush her teeth. But Nico doesn’t mind, right now, that Karolina doesn’t have morning breath when she does. She only wants to kiss her girlfriend a bit better, so she nods, and then, Karolina’s kissing her on the lips, softly at first and then  more prodding. It’s a kiss asking for better purchase, which Nico gives.

Nico likes being woken up like this, her brain tries to think, in between the kissing and Karolina’s heated hands dancing against her skin. 

Nico has only just begun entertaining the idea of asking Karolina to skip meditation for today (or if they can just skip breakfast altogether) when, suddenly (and, rather rudely), Karolina’s already pulling away.

The whine that finds its way up Nico’s throat makes Karolina chuckle. Apologizing, she ducks her head, saying she has to meditate and “See you at breakfast, Nico,” and just like that, Karolina’s already out the door before Nico can protest any further.

Nico doesn’t bother trying to get up or to chase Karolina, simply remained sitting and staring at the door with slightly parted lips, very wide awake, confused, and a level of frustrated that shouldn’t be allowed this fucking early in the morning.

She throws herself against the bed with a groan and tries to bury her head in the pillows in an attempt to fall back asleep. It doesn’t work because the covers smell too much like Karolina. With another groan, Nico pulls herself completely out of bed and trudged out of their bedroom to a sad journey to the bathroom.

Once inside, she opens the faucet, splashes her face with cold water. She closes the faucet and glares at her reflection for two beats before grabbing her toothbrush and aggressively brushing her teeth. Once done with that and everything else, Nico decided to drag someone down misery lane with her and barges in on Alex. His room was the most un-Karolina place to be.

It was also the safest because (1) nobody wants to walk in on a naked Gertchase, or, worse yet, (1.5) Gertchase while they’re going at it, (2) nobody wants to wake up a sleeping dinosaur, and (3) Molly is a wonderful cinnamon roll undeserving of a rude awakening.

To Nico’s disappointment, Alex was, already, unfortunately, awake. He invites her to make breakfast with him for the gang. Grudgingly, but with only mild grumbling, she follows him into the kitchen.

(Alex was, at least, good for a distracting, if not infuriating, conversation.)

And, so, breakfast.

Breakfast is somehow simultaneously worse and better.

Karolina’s fingers are trailing places where they shouldn’t be, just there, tracing patterns on the inside of Nico’s thighs (thank whoever made shorts a thing) inching upwards until they’re deliciously pressing against her—and right in front of our fucking friends, Karolina, what the fuck. Nico is so very glad she’s good at schooling her expression because Karolina is a fucking pro at being subtle with her movements.

When Nico’s breath hitches in her throat, she covers it with a cough, pretending she’s accidentally choked on whatever it was she was chewing on at the time. 

From the corner of her eyes, she sees Karolina smirking.

She’s not sure if she’s imagining it but Alex is raising an eyebrow at her, does he know? Fuck. She bares her teeth at him at what she hoped was a smile.

Languid and steady strokes, Karolina keeps her fingers pace as such. Nico’s ready to drag Karolina in the next room and ask her to, please, just fuck me properly already, and the next time she felt an urge to moan, Nico covers it with a sneeze.

“You okay, Nico?” It’s Chase who asks.

“Mh,” she almost gasps, “hmm,” she throws a glare Karolina’s why, who only shrugs a shoulder ever so slightly.

Alex chokes back his laughter, and for a moment, Nico wants to sock him. He fucking knows, doesn’t he? Shit.

But, honestly? Nico’s only slightly complaining. Everything’s an uphill battle and this is a fucking mountain she’s enjoying to climb. The thrill of being caught (of already having been caught?) was part of the fun and—

Then breakfast is done, and Karolina is away from her completely and despite already feeling overheated, Nico still missed the heat coming from Karolina’s hands. 

Nico is left in a complete dazed but she still manages to wonder how she managed to eat without making a complete scene.

Nico steals a look towards Karolina’s way. Her girlfriend looked unaffected. Or, perhaps, unaffected wasn’t the right term to use. Maybe it’s more like Karolina’s really good at pretending she wasn’t just about fingering her girlfriend right in front of their friends while they’re all having breakfast. Karolina’s managed to paint a convincingly innocent look on her face but she doesn’t look unaffected. There’s a light blush staining her cheeks all the way down to her (unfortunately, Nico muses) covered chest.

Nico just… stares at Karolina. She doesn’t stand up even as everybody starts moving.

Alex starts clearing out the table. Molly starts leading Old Lace away for a morning walk. Chase and Karolina are going to the kitchen to wash the dishes. It’s all effective synchronicity, Nico thinks, feeling like a cog out of place. She doesn’t notice Karolina urging Chase to go to the kitchen before her until a kiss is being pressed against her temple. “Close your mouth, babe.”

Nico does, her cheeks darkening. So apparently she was gaping. Well, she reserves the right to gape. She huffs, and then says, with an expression a cross between a scowl and a smirk, “You’re blushing, Karolina.”

“So are you.”

I know. Nico doesn’t let the tiny smirk on her lips disappear. “Can we—”

“Later.” And Karolina’s voice carried a definite promise of more, Nico’s just not sure when later is going to fucking come.

Before she can muse any further, Gert is already tapping her on her shoulder and asking her if she’s ready to go out and buy some stuff because yaddayaddayadda but Nico’s not listening. She mumbles a quick, “Let me just get ready,” so as not to be rude, and then runs out of the dining room.

And, so, outside.

Gert is making small talk or, at least, she’s trying to. Nico appreciates it anyhow, needing all the distraction she can get. She’s still, surprisingly, able to answer. They take a leisurely pace and everything’s going fine until the first text that Karolina sends.

It’s a selfie. Karolina’s making a face at the camera. It’s adorable.

And then it’s not.

And it just… devolves from there. 

The following images become more and more risqué and Nico’s face, in turn, becomes redder and redder.

If Gert notices, she doesn’t say a word. In fact, she doesn’t say anything at all. Nico doesn’t notice her falling silent, far too enraptured by the images Karolina is sending her.

Honest to all that is fucking unholy, Nico has no idea where Karolina got that red lingerie she’s wearing.

The texts don’t really stop until they get back home. Thankfully, they do get back home without any incident except for Nico’s impending bisexual explosion. 

The first thing she’ll do when she sees Karolina is kiss the ever living starlights outta her and— okay, well, realistically, she’ll have to wait for Gert to leave. When they get back, Karolina is waiting for them by the hallway. Probably seeing the (admittedly hungry look) on Karolina’s face (she’s trying to be subtle but the look Nico returns her is practically smoldering so) Gert excuses herself, no doubt in a hurry to get away from the palpable sexual tension (and they say she and Chase were bad).

Even before Gert’s out of earshot, Karolina says, “I missed you.” 

Nico doesn’t have to listen to closely to hear the fire burning behind those words. “I could tell.”

There’s a pause, both girls are holding their breaths, waiting to see who would continue their little dance.

“Couldn’t you have waited?” Nico finally says, “I was gone for less than an hour.”

“A lot can happen in less than an hour.” Karolina bites on her lower lip to stop herself from smiling too much.

“Did you…”

“Touch myself?” Karolina tilts her head, “Yes.”

Technically, Nico doesn’t have to ask. She has pictures (and videos) sitting in her inbox as proof.

“And did you…” Nico trails off again, waiting for Karolina to continue again.

Karolina shakes her head a fervent “no.” Of course she didn’t cum. Nico hasn’t given her the permission to do so just yet. 

“You know if you keep this up I will have to punish you, right, Karolina?” The smirk on Nico’s lips grows.

“Yes.”

“Is that what you want?” Nico muses, as if she doesn’t already know, her smirk stretches into a predator grin, “To be punished?”

Karolina’s response is another “yes,” this time more breathless than the last.

Nico waits, and after half an eternity of silence, she says, “Kiss me.”

Karolina obeys. She pulls Nico close, gentle lips serving fiery kisses. She lifts Nico up and presses her against the wall, Nico steadies herself by wrapping her legs around Karolina’s waist. Nico likes this. She likes that Karolina is this strong but is still malleable beneath her fingers. She enjoys that Karolina relinquishes control, loves that she’s the one being trusted with such vulnerability. 

(Neither of them are worried about being walked in on. Gert knows better than not to warn the rest of the gang about Karolina and Nico.)

Karolina breaks away briefly only to trail kisses than Nico’s neck. She starts alternating between sucking and biting. Nico moans, suddenly gasps, “Karolina if you give me a hickey, I swear—”

Karolina kisses her on the lips again, surprising her. Her hands dance close to everywhere but against the places Nico wants them to be. Before Nico can make a demand, Karolina’s letting her down slowly.

Panting, Nico manages to give an order. “Against the wall, Karolina. Face it and spread your legs.”

“Mhm,” Karolina nods, follows. Nico manages a small grin at the fact that Karolina looked just as disheveled as she felt. And, also, thank fuck for skirts.

Nico presses against Karolina, her hands coming between the other girl’s legs. She let her fingers drag  across Karolina’s damp panties. Despite the lightness of Nico’s touch, Karolina lets out a soft mewl. She shudders, almost grinding against Nico’s lightly rubbing fingers.

“That’s enough.”

Karolina’s hips halt stutteringly.

Nico grins, “Remove your underwear. Give it to me.”

(To say that Karolina’s underwear was damp is an understatement.)

And that’s how Karolina goes the rest of the day: in her not exactly long skirt, with her definitely long legs, and with positively no underwear. For a while, Nico herself wondered if she should go the rest of the day the same way too.

And, so, the rest of the day Karolina goes like this: whenever Karolina gets the chance to steal Nico away, she does so. She leaves as quickly as she comes (ha, or not comes).

When dinner time rolls around, Nico feels high strung enough to snap if so much as a feather grazes her head. That was fine, Nico thinks, looking at Karolina, she wasn’t the only one who need a long and slow fuck to bring her down from her high.

It’s during dinner that Nico gets her revenge on Karolina for pulling her little stunt during breakfast. Thankfully, this time, they’re all done eating and only Karolina and Nico remain at the table. This time, it’s Nico’s fingers dancing along Karolina’s legs.

Gert and Molly are cuddling on the sofa, watching something on the TV. Old Lace lying down close to them, seemingly engrossed by whatever the sisters were currently watching. Chase was in the kitchen with Alex, the two boys working on some machine or another (another one of Chase’s little experiments that Gert refused to be a part of since the last one exploded).

And speaking of explosions.

This time, at least, nobody has an inkling of what they’re doing. Nico, on the other hand, is aware of nothing else but Karolina’s heat wrapped around her fingers. She moves, languidly, steadily. Her face is resting against her other hand as she watches Karolina through hooded eyes. 

“Breathe, darling,” Nico murmurs softly, “You don’t have to hold your breath.”

Karolina tries to tell Nico to shut up but her words come out as a garbled groan. Karolina may be good at being subtle when she’s the one doing the touching but she’s bad at staying quiet when she’s the one being touched. Case in point, unlike Nico during breakfast, Karolina isn’t sitting still, she’s grinding to the rhythm of Nico’s thrusting fingers. Her eyes are closed, her lips are parted, and her chest is heaving. Anyone who could see them would know exactly what was going on.

After half of forever Nico feels Karolina clenching around her fingers, sees her shoulders shake, her breath hitching, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc… just another stroke and

“Karolina, are you okay?” Molly asks, ever innocent, ever (and thankfully) unaware of whatever it is Nico and Karolina are sometimes up to. Neither of the girls who’d been sitting at the table realizes that Molly had gotten up to get a drink.

“She’s fine, Molly!” It’s Gert who replies with a squeak, suddenly, from the couch. Her eyes are wide and her face is red. (She knows.)

Karolina’s face is still red, and she’s still panting. Nico hasn’t moved an inch, which was the problem because two of her fingers are still buried knuckle deep in Karolina. She throws Karolina a warning look which the other girl returns with a panicked one. Nico winces inwardly. Gotta pull the bandaid off fast and shit like that, right?

So she withdraws her fingers in what she hoped was one swift movement.

Karolina chokes on a moan. (She tries to salvage the slip with a cough but—)

Gert’s face turns redder.

Molly looks like she’s about to ask again so Nico says, “Karolina was just telling me about how she wanted to go back to our room to rest.” 

The meaningful look she sends Karolina is unnecessary because the other girl is already bolting from her seat, half from mortification and half from excess excitement, as soon as the sentence was over. Nico gives it a few minutes, then, after a while she excuses herself and follows Karolina to their bedroom. 

Gert manages a weak thumbs up. Nico manages a grin. Molly manages not to look confused.

When Nico finally enters their room, she finds Karolina perched on the bed with an expression that somehow manages to combine a satisfied smirk with an innocent look. Patient. Karolina looks like she’s been waiting patiently, but Nico could see the excitement radiating off of her skin—a little flush here, a little tremble there, the slightly uneven breathing she’s trying to put a rein on.

Even if she had just been fingering Karolina, Nico decided to play.

A look passes between her and Karolina. A pause, a beat, a breath, then—

“What the hell was up with you today?” Nico asks, scowling as she shuts the door close. She doesn’t walk closer to Karolina, not yet.

“Nothing,” Karolina bats her eyelashes. Her expression is innocent but her tone is gleeful. “Is it wrong to shower my girlfriend with affection?”

“It is,” Nico says with a huff, “when you get her frustrated.”

“So,” Karolina tilts her head just so, even without changing her tone Nico can hear the challenge, “What are you going to do about it?”

“I’d say I’d spank you, babe,” when Nico grins, it’s almost predatory, almost, “but I think you’d enjoy that.”

Nico sends a quick prayer to whoever was listening, and brings out her staff.  She twirls around her staff with easy grace, adopting an unaffected expression.

“Strip, sweetheart, and lay on the bed,” Nico orders gently. Karolina shifts, she shudders. Nico’s tone leaves no room for an argument. Karolina, who’d only been wearing her bra, a tank top and a skirt, makes quick work of them. She’s almost completely naked in less than a minute. She’s about to lay on the bed when Nico lets out a displeased sound.

“The lovely bra has to go too, K.”

Karolina turns her back against Nico and somehow manages to make a show out of removing her bra. A pleased moan tumbles out of Nico’s lips, making Karolina smile as she turns and faces Nico. When she’s completely naked, Karolina lays on the bed. Nico follows all of Karolina’s movements carefully, hungrily.

“Arms above your head. Spread your legs.” 

Karolina doesn’t have to be told twice to follow. Then, with a flourish of her staff and a few soft utterances, Karolina’s tied to the bed, spreadeagled, like Nico’s been wanting her since breakfast. She vanishes her staff and admires Karolina.

“You look beautiful,” her voice comes out as a purr, entirely too pleased and especially reverent. Then,  without losing the reverence in her voice, Nico asks, “Just so we’re clear, you’re okay with this, right?”

“Yes, Nico” Karolina grins, testing the ropes tying her to the bed, “I consent to this a hundred percent. I know our safeword. And just in case you’re in the mood to gag me tonight, I know what to do then too.”

Karolina’s series of comments makes Nico scoff. She chuckles, “If you’re too loud, which I’m sure you’re going to be, I will have to gag you so Alex doesn’t come here rattling our doors down like last time.”

Karolina winces and flushes red, “That was a definite mood killer.”

“It was,” Nico nods empathically, before asking, playing again, “Now, where were we?”

“I think you were about to come here and kiss me.” 

Nico decided that she was going to very much enjoy Karolina coming undone. Neither the little smile nor the composed look on her face was staying there for very long, so Nico lets Karolina wear them for a few moments longer. She walks closer and sits on the side of the bed. “Such a demanding little sub, aren’t you?”

“Yes, ma’am.” The words are spoken with a smirk still painted on Karolina’s lips.

Cheeky, Nico thinks, “We’ll have to work on that, won’t we?”

Karolina’s breath hitches in her throat, anticipation colors her words, “Yes, ma’am.”

Nico straddles her girlfriend. 

For now, she was going to remain clothed (it was time to do her laundry anyway). She bends down and kisses Karolina full on the lips. It’s heated, carrying the weight of each and every little touch and kiss that they’d been sharing between them the whole day. She bites down, gently, on Karolina’s lower lip causing the other girl to moan into the kiss.

Nico’s unsure why, maybe she’s just giddy, but she finds herself laughing softly, “You’re really into that whole biting thing, K.”

“You really talk too much,” Karolina says, whining, struggling against the ropes binding her. 

“My girlfriend and her smart mouth,” Nico murmurs wryly, in between kisses against Karolina’s neck, “You think we can find other uses for it?”

“Strip and find—AH—o…ut” Karolina teasing retort is reduced to a whimper when Nico starts grinding her thigh against her groin, (but at least Karolina had the decency to moan out a soft, “ma’am”).

“Karolina,” Nico says, voice lilting. She pulls away slightly but the ministrations her leg was applying against Karolina doesn’t abate. Karolina, for her part, is grinding against her too. “You know I won’t be allowing you to cum so easily tonight, right?”

Karolina shudders making her hips buck unevenly, “Yes, ma’am.”

“I’m going to use you for my pleasure instead.” 

“Yes, ma—aaaaa,” without preamble, Nico grabs one of her breasts in her hands, then with her fingers, pinches Karolina’s nipple. Nico lets her hand trail down Karolina ribs, enjoying the feel of skin against skin.She grinds against Karolina a little harder, “Are you already about to cum?”

“I, yes, we, outside, we were—”

“You mean, outside when we were at the dinner table and I was fucking your cunt?” Nico murmurs harshly against the crook of Karolina’s neck.

“Yes,” she shivers, hips undulating.

“Are you about to cum, Karolina?” 

“Y- yeeeess,” when Nico feels Karolina tensing, she stops moving, Karolina doesn’t.

“Still your hips, Karolina. Didn’t I just say you couldn’t cum?”

With a whine, Karolina stops moving. “Yes ma’am. Sorry, ma’am.”

Nico gets off the bed entirely, produces her staff again and magics her clothes away. The sight makes Karolina whimper.

“Like what you see then?” Nico’s bravado falls a bit, suddenly shy. 

“Always, Nico,” despite herself, Karolina manages a loopy grin. After a pause, she adds, “Ma’am, will you please get back here?”

This time, it’s Nico who obeys. Her shyness melts away as it always does before Karolina. With a silly grin of her own, she says, jokingly, “Clearly, I’m doing something wrong if you can still be this demanding.”

They have time, Nico thinks, to be out of character. They have time to indulge. They have time to be together. She was going to make sure of it. Karolina was going to fight for it to be true. 

For now, however, Nico knows only one thing for sure, that tonight was going to be very long. They weren’t going to get any sleep but that was okay, they had time. 

(Also, Nico thinks smugly, Alex wasn’t going to get any sleep either.)

Chapter Text

Nico is twenty. Twenty. Two Zero. Twenty.

Oh my goddess, she’s reached her twenties.

Wow.

Wow.

She looks over at Karolina, still asleep beside her. Today is one of the rare mornings where Nico is awake before Karolina. The sun has yet to peek through the horizon, even without looking at the clock, Nico knows it’ll be a few minutes more before it does. Their room is still dark, barely illuminated by the lamp post outside, its light barely filtering through their curtain.

Despite only having snagged a few hours of sleep, Nico felt well-rested. She’s mostly filled with restless energy. Today is her birthday. She’s twenty. Cultish parents, being on the run, being hunted down, getting kidnapped and being put under an induced coma, like a hundred different life-threatening scenarios, opening a damned portal to another universe (?!)— all things considered, Nico didn’t think she’d get to twenty.

Twenty.

Unholy mother of—

She’s no longer a teenager!

Nico couldn’t help but let out a tiny gasp. She looks at her hands, turning them over and back as if waiting for something to appear or change. She turns back to Karolina, still asleep and looking ever peaceful. A fond smile creeps its way onto Nico’s lips, she reaches over to touch Karolina’s face, fingers grazing her cheek with a featherlight touch. She cups Karolina’s face gently, careful not to wake her. 

Three years.

They’ve been together nearly three years.

Wow.

The way the realization settles in Nico’s chest, blooming with so much warmth and wonder, had her eyes filling with tears. Nico Minoru is twenty years old, and she’s been with the love of her life for three years. Her thumb lightly caresses Karolina’s cheekbone. The other girl leans into the touch, a sleepy half-smile forming on her lips. Nico kisses her on the forehead, smiling when she hears Karolina sigh happily.

She settles back under the covers, snuggling closer towards Karolina. The taller girl lets out a happy hum, arms easily taking her in a loose embrace. Nico smiles, closes her eyes. For a few minutes longer, she basks in warmth and tranquility.

Everything is good with the world.

Things are not good with the world.

“Of course not,” Nico grumbles, scowling at the beginnings of chaos playing out before her. “They really couldn’t have picked another day to take over the world?”

Karolina chuckles, slinging an arm around her shoulders and pulling her in a half hug. “Happy birthday, babe.”

“Hey, at least this is more fun, right?” Chase offers, grinning and gesturing with one gauntleted hand.  “Last time we had to deal with a bunch of Ultron knock-offs. Major pain in the ass.”

“So, what,” Alex snorts, looking at the incoming troops of alien forces. “You prefer knock-off Chitauri?”

“Excuse me,” Molly interjects with her best expression of mock offense. “They’re called Krechyans.”

“Yeah, didn’t you watch their broadcast?” Gert asks, trying for serious mom voice and failing when she ends up clearing her throat to stifle a giggle.

“See when you say that it makes them sound more like NPCs from Papers, Please,” Alex commented, overhead the loud droning buzz of incoming aircrafts can be heard. 

Alex looks up, everyone follows his gaze.

“Maybe let’s help people evacuate first, and then discuss this later.” Karolina declares, decisively already scanning their immediate vicinity for any possible advantages they can use. Then, with a tiny smirk, she adds, “Anyway, they look more like knock-off Skrulls to me.”

“How’d you get from Chitauri to Skrulls?” Nico turned to her, looking genuinely flabbergasted even as she summons her Staff, twirling it with practiced, almost absent-minded ease.

“I mean, look at their tech!” Karolina gestures, the tips of her fingers beginning to glow as she gesticulates. “Looks a bit sleeker, but doesn’t the design remind you a little bit of Skrull tech?”

“Huh.” It’s Alex who replies this time, squinting in the general direction Karolina had gestured at. “You’re right. Yeaaaaah, I can see it.”

Somewhere in the distance, an explosion reverberates through the city.

“Right.” Chase clears his throat, rolling his neck and shoulders. “Evacuation.”

“I’m on it.” Gert nods, reaching towards Old Lace through their bond, then turning to Alex, asks, “Alex, you good?”

He nods, taking his gun off its holster and turning its safety off. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Chase nods at the two of them, then turns to Molly. “Molly, you’re with me. Help me distract their ground forces.”

Molly grins, cracks her knuckle, and gives him an excited grin. “I’ve got your back.”

“Karolina and I will take care of the smaller aircrafts.” Nico points towards the sky with her staff.

They all nod at one another, each sharing a determined look. 

“We’ll regroup in a bit.” Karolina finally says just as they started heading towards the direction they were most needed.”

Before they’re completely out of earshot from one another, Alex shouts, “Karolina, find me a ship!”

Karolina, now entirely lit up in bright light and a dizzying array of colors, gives Alex a thumbs up. She doesn’t bother looking at him to see if he saw her response, she doesn’t wait for him to speak either. She doesn’t need to. He knows she’ll get it done. They work well together, that’s why they’re a team.

Nico and Karolina take to the sky, ready to take down a few birds.

Karolina and Nico find themselves huddled in the safety of an alley maybe half an hour after the chaos exploded and began unraveling throughout the city.

Nico is assessing Karolina for any injuries, and Karolina lets her without complaint. If anything, she’s got a dopey smile on her lips while Nico’s hands and eyes roam all over her face and body. 

She enjoys having Nico fuss over her. 

After a while, Nico lets out a sigh of relief, satisfied that Karolina’s more than fit for another round of fighting. “We’ll need to disinfect this gash later and ice your shoulder so it doesn’t bruise too badly. But you’re fine.”

Karolina’s dopey smile widens into a grin, “I know I’m fine.”

Nico tries to look stern but Karolina’s sunny expression is infectious. After a while, she concedes with a small smile of her own and a roll of her eyes. “Yes, K, you are fine.”

Karolina grins even wider, then with a sober yet still fond expression, she goes and starts fussing over Nico too. It’s hardly fussing, she’s a bit less intense than Nico had been (or maybe intense in a different way). She checks Nico for injuries, and when she’s happy Nico is okay, minor bruises and scrapes considered, she lets her hand rest against Nico’s face.

She marvels at the warmth and softness of Nico’s cheek pressed against her palm, the sheer there-ness of Nico. She’s grateful for this–even this one, small moment, here in this awful smelling, very cramped, barely safe alley–Karolina is grateful. After having nearly lost Nico, Karolina cherishes all the moments that tell her that Nico is still there, alive and well and breathing.

Imagine how losing you would destroy her.

Karolina thinks back to the months she thought she’d lost Nico forever, remembers the way she threw herself into every fight like it would be her last (remembers thinking every time she wanted it to be her last). She thinks of the anxiety of separation that curled and clawed in her chest long after they got Nico back, the nightmares and trepidation she tried and failed to hide.

Karolina doesn’t want Nico to experience any of that. 

Sure, maybe she’s still a tad reckless and more than a bit self-sacrificing. And maybe those are traits she’ll never rid herself of completely. But she will fight her damned hardest to return to Nico’s side, to remain there.

Karolina leans, presses her forehead against Nico.

All around them a cacophony of car alarms, explosions, humans and Krechyan alike screaming.

For a brief moment, none of it matters. 

Nico kisses Karolina, chaste but tender. “This won’t be the last we’ll ever be together.”

They’re serious for only half a beat longer. Karolina scrunches her nose and bites her lower lip in an attempt not to laugh. “Did you just quote Prince of Persia?”

“I was hoping you wouldn’t notice,” Nico answers sheepishly, cheeks slightly red.

“Don’t worry,” Karolina’s are twinkling with affection and sincerity. “I still think it's kinda romantic.”

Neither of them notices their friends arriving. Not until Gert exclaims, “Oh my god, can you gays stop being so melodramatic.”

Nico laughs, pulling away from Karolina but keeping their hands intertwined. “This coming from the girl who re-enacted an entire section of Casablanca?”

“That’s different!” Gert waves dismissively. “That was distraction!”

“Honestly, I was more impressed Chase knew all the lines.” Alex pitches in, give Chase a few hard pats on the shoulder.

“W- well,” Chase stutters, defensive and turning a distinct shade of pink. “Gert likes the movie!”

“Awww,” Nico, reached for Chase’s cheeks and pinches him. “He was trying to be romantic”

They all laugh. Chase swats Nico’s hand away, muttering something incoherent under his breath.

“Guys! We’ve spotted three new ships.”  Molly comes running from the opposite end of the alley, Old Lace trailing closely behind her. “It’s bigger than the ones we were just dealing with.”

“Relax, Molly,” Alex says, as Molly comes to a halt in front of them. “It’s like, just another Thursday. How many of these we get in a year?”

There’s an explosion somewhere not far off.

Molly glares, “So not the point.”

“Alright, alright.” Gert concedes, briefly she gives her sister a one-over to check for any bruises. “We’ll decide later who the mushier couple is.”

Another explosion, this time closer.

A group of Krechyans start filtering through the alley, from both ends and from the top of the buildings.

Old Lace begins growling, ready to pounce.

“I’ve got this side!” Chase announces, sending a blast of light beam towards an incoming contingent of Krechyans. Molly is there, backing him up, catching and throwing a Krechyan that tries to get Chase from his blindside. 

Gert, Old Lace, and Alex start heading off in the opposite direction, tearing through their attackers there. Meanwhile, Karolina and Nico take the fight up to the Krechyans dropping down from the roof.

“Literally, how are there still so many of them?!” Nico screams in frustration, blasting a straggler off the roof. 

Just as Karolina blasts a group of aliens, an aircraft whizzes past them. Karolina and Nico freeze, staring at the smoke the ship left in its wake. It was headed, as far as Nico knew, towards a densely populated area of the city, where the evacuated civilians were being directed to the subways.

She and Karolina look at each other.

“That’s not much bigger than a quinjet, right?” Karolina asks, already sizing the ship up and wracking her brain for approaches to take it down.

“Uh huh.” Nico hums, nodding. She peers over the edge, looking for Alex. “Wilder we found you a ship!”

“Cool, please don’t—” Alex picks up a piece of debris and whacks a lone Krechyan across the face. “—destroy it!” 

“We’ll try!” Nico shouts back, half-teasing. Alex gives her a brief scowl, throws her a middle finger and an eye-roll, before rushing towards the Krechyan that slipped past Old Lace and barreling towards Gert.

Karolina watches a moment longer, then when she’s content Alex’s got things taken care of, she places a hand on Nico’s shoulder, taking care not to startle her. “You go high I go low?” 

Nico turns to Karolina just as Old Lace snaps her jaw shut on the Krechyan Alex had just tackled. Nico suppresses a wince, yeah that guy’s dead, instead giving Karolina a smirk. “You really like me on top, don’t you?”

Karolina winks, smirking indulgently, “Most of the time.”

She flies off in pursuit of the ship, leaving Nico behind, caught off-guard and the. laughing at her antics. Nico shakes her head, makes a show of jumping off the ledge and flying in the same direction as Karolina with her staff. 

Nico trails behind Karolina, biding her time. Karolina reaches the ship, speeds past it from under, sending a continuous beam of energy towards its belly. It doesn’t do a lot of damage against the hull, it isn’t meant to, but Karolina’s attack is powerful enough to rock the ship. It gives Nico enough time to surround the front of the ship with a force field that momentarily stops it in its track.

Nico can feel the ship’s attempts to break free and strains against it. “Karolina, up here! There’s a hatch!”

“Got it!” Karolina flies up, sees the hatch Nico is referring to, and goes to it. A well-aimed shot blasts the hatch open. Nico keeps the ship as still as she can, allowing Karolina to dive through the opening without a scratch. Nico sees flashes of light, hears the guttural scream of Krechyan in pain.

The commotion stops. The ship is suddenly still, turning into three-thousand kilograms of deadweight. Nico strains for a few seconds as she reorients her hold on it, heart thudding against her chest when Karolina doesn’t fly out immediately after the lull.

“Karolina!”

Nico feels the ship move, just the barest hints of tremor, like something was thrown against its walls inside.

A few seconds later, Karolina flies out, no less brighter than before. Nico let’s out a relieved sigh. “You good?”

“Yeah. Ship’s all clear and functional.” Karolina says with a smile, gesturing at the Krechyan aircraft. “I’ll go get Alex.”

Nico nods and Karolina flies away, “And I’ll bring this up a bit higher.”

Nico had debated putting the ship on the ground. It would be easier, less effort for her. But Alex might have difficulties taking off on a street filled with debris. So, bringing it up seemed smarter. Less chances getting ambushed by the Krechyans on the smaller, low-flying aircraft too.

Karolina scans the area as she lands beside Alex. “Where’re the others?”

“Chase spotted a building filled with trapped people.” Alex said, pointing towards an apartment complex a few blocks away. “He and Gert headed are headed there to try and help.”

“I stayed behind as back up,” Molly adds. Then, she looks at the building Alex had just pointed to. “I’ll go check on them now. We’ll regroup in the evacuation zone?”

“Yeah,” Alex confirms, reaching to give Molly’s shoulder a light squeeze. “Be careful, okay?”

Molly smiles, giving a thumbs up. “I will, no worries.”

They give her a nod, watching her back as she runs off. When Molly disappears from view, Karolina turns to Alex,  “Come’n, Alex, let’s get you up there.”

“Let’s g–AH!” Alex yelps loudly as Karolina (literally) sweeps him off his feet, carrying him bridal style as she flies up and back towards Nico and the ship.

“Could’ve used a little warning.” Alex grumbles, clinging to Karolina with one arm and holding onto his glasses with his other hand.

“Next time.” Karolina laughs giving him an good-natured, awkward pat. Through the gust of wind, Karolina thinks she hears Alex grumbling don’t drop me, I’m too young.

“Hey, you’ve brought our bride.” Nico greets as they approach, smirking at Alex who sticks his tongue out.

“Ha. Ha. Just tell me how I can get in.”

Nico’s smirk turns evil, “Drop him down the hatch, K.”

Alex wraps both his arms around Karolina, locking his fingers together as if the tall girl might actually drop him. “Do not fucking drop me anywhere.” 

Karolina laughs, shoulders shaking. Alex tightens his grip instinctively. 

They past through the hatch with ease. Karolina puts him down carefully. Alex lets out a tiny sigh of relief. He starts exploring the cockpit, Karolina hangs back just in case Alex can’t pilot the ship. 

“It’s like playing a video game, it’s like playing a video game…” Alex mumbles under his breath as he looks around. He fiddles with the board around him, flipping and clicking switches and buttons. It looked random to Karolina, but less than a minute later Alex is exclaiming, “I think I’ve got!”

“I’m letting go in three!” Nico shouts, her voice sounding far away from inside the cockpit. Still, she sounded so clearly belligerent. “If you crash, that’s on you!”

“Ye of little faith.” Alex mutters to himself as he straps himself to the pilot’s seat. He fiddles with the control board some more, and the ship’s engine roars to life, settling into a steady hum. Alex smiles to himself, satisfied. Then, to Nico, he shouts, “Let go!”

The ship lurches forward, dropping a few feet and then ascending rather shakily. Karolina, who hasn’t had time to hold on to something, is nearly thrown off her feet. When she regains her balance, she opts to just float a few inches in the air. It takes a few seconds more for Alex to get the ship to hover steadily.

There’s a thud above them, making Karolina look up. Nico’s there peering from the broken hatch. Their eyes meet in passing as Nico tries to look at their would-be pilot. “You good in there, Wilder?”

“Worried about me, Nico?” Alex asks cheekily, head inclined and lips quirked into a smirk.

“Worried about you accidentally killing my girlfriend more like.” Nico retorts, rolling her eyes. 

“They’ve got a map here,” Alex says instead of responding to Nico’s statement directly. He taps the edge of the screen to his right, “I think the dots here are their airborne troops.”

“You go take care of that,” Nico nods, then she looks behind her shoulder in the general direction of the alley way they’d last regrouped. A short pause, then, Nico looks at Karolina with a tiny smile. “I’ll check on the others. Karolina you wanna come?”

“Uh huh.” Karolina nods, sporting a smile of her own. She floats up towards the hatch,

Nico blinks, a weird sense of déjà vu washes over her, warm and insistent. She’s belatedly aware of the gasp that escapes her as disbelief and awe all at once crash in her chest.

Three years. Nico’s thoughts from earlier echoing louder. I’m twenty and I’ve been with Karolina for three years.

“Something on my face?” 

Without missing a beat, Nico answers, “A beautiful smile.”

Karolina blinks, confused for a moment, and then her cheeks flush red. Still, the smile the breaks onto her face is radiant. 

“Yep, there it is.” Nico laughs, grin so wide her cheeks hurt.

“Nico that’s—“

“Better than quoting Prince of Persia?”

Karolina laughs at that, but before she can respond, Alex screams from inside the cockpit, faux annoyance dripping from his tone and laced with playfulness.

“Can you lesbians flirt later when the world isn’t ending?!” 

Nico snorts. “I’m bisexual!”

“World still ending!” As if you punctuate his thoughts, there’s an explosion somewhere below them.

“When you said you wanted to celebrate your birthday with a bang, this wasn’t how I imagined it.” Karolina laughs, threading her fingers with Nico’s and bringing her hand up to her lips for a kiss. Then, she peers into the cockpit.  “I’ll take Nico to the building Molly headed off to.”

“Yes, please.” Alex drawls, dramatic and with a lot of emphasis. “Save the day now, flirt later.”

Nico’s laughter is hearty as she and Karolina begun floating off the ship’s hull, “Don’t crash, Wilder.”

Then, moments later, when she and Karolina are well out of Alex’s range, Nico turns to her girlfriend with a cheeky grin and waggling eyebrows. “You know we could still celebrate with a bang after all this.”

Karolina looks at Nico with an expression close to disbelief. “You need to spend less time with Chase.”

Lost in the sky, above the clouds is their laughter intermingling, delighted and bright as the sun in the horizon behind them.

They enter the building from the top floor, through someone’s balcony. The sliding door has been left open. There’s an ash tray on the floor in the corner, with three cigarettes hastily put out. There are two bottles of beer near the tray, one of them looks newly opened. Nico side steps a third bottle and a puddle of nearly dry, spilt beer.

Nico imagines what might’ve happened. Three friends, housemates, a family, or, hell, a freaking throuple just enjoying a nice conversation over beer and smokes, and suddenly aliens descend from the sky.

Nico sweeps her eyes over the living room as they past through. It’s an intrusion, she knows, and she wants to keep her eyes pinned to the door but she can’t. The apartment isn’t really big, but the living room alone has more things than all the rooms in their current safe house combined.

Everything’s been left as is, cluttered and messy, but not the kind of disarray you’d expect from people hurriedly leaving their homes when threatened by otherworldly invaders. With the exception of the spilt beer outside, everything in the apartment is left as though the people there had merely stepped out for a few minutes, maybe to go on a run or to grab another pack of beer.

It becomes increasingly clear—as she and Karolina search the building from top to bottom, from apartment to apartment whose front doors were left unlocked or slightly ajar—that, for many of the people who live in this building, it is just another Thursday.

The only place where there were any significant signs of struggle was the basement storage and maintenance area. Nico deduces the building management likely has evacuation plans for these sort of emergencies, explains why the people who lived were able to leave their homes mostly chaos free.

Nico follows the maze of things strewn about the floor, imagines the fight that predicated it. 

There’s a metal toolbox, torn open at its hinges, one of its corners is crumpled—Molly’s handiwork, probably. The recipient is a now unmoving Krechyan lying flat on its faced, the back of its helmet shattered and oozing dark, purplish goo. Somewhere else, there’s an overturned shelf and two dead Krechyans. One has gash on its abdomen, the other has a hole burned through his chest. Nico imagines Gert overturning a shelf to slow down their two pursuers, Chase and Old Lace lunging in for the kill after they’d stumbled.

The basements empty and there are no human casualties. Nico breathes a sigh of relief. They got out. Hopefully, they got to the evacuation zone—the subway systems which have been the go-to safety zone whenever a bunch of dickish aliens decided to wreck havoc on the city overhead—safely, all alive, and well, and none too injured. 

They really need to invest in some working comms. Their last one they were using got fried and they hadn’t thought to replace it. That should’ve been the priority. Shit was always happening and—

“There’s no one here.” Karolina declares, snapping Nico out of her thoughts with a jolt. “We must’ve missed them.”

Nico blinks at that.

Karolina is suddenly all too aware that Nico’s staring at her. She feels her cheeks turn hot under Nico’s intense gaze. She laughs, nervously, starts rambling, “I mean. Obviously no one’s here, except for them, but they’re very dead, and they’re n—”

Nico kisses her.

It’s more the suddenness than the actual kiss that silences her. It’s awkward, their front teeth clack together, and Karolina nearly bites her tongue from the impact. Still, the awkwardness is worth it, because Nico is laughing so hard, eyes wet with tears, and clutching her arms to keep herself steady.

Nico is leaning against her when she settles, face resting against Karolina’s chest, arms circling her waist, as a wistful sigh escapes her lips. “Sorry, not my best moment.”

Karolina can’t see it, but she hears the smile in Nico’s voice. She rests her cheeks against Nico’s head, wrapping her in a loose embrace. “You’re in an awfully good mood for the end of the world.”

Nico is silent, nearly still save for the rise and fall of her shoulders as she breathes. After a moment she raises her head, leans back enough to look at Karolina, and lets her eyes wander across the curves and planes of her face. In Karolina’s eyes she sees ocean and sky, to fall into and to fly towards.

Nico loves her. The sentiment is so simple, yet so profound, and Nico loves her with every fiber of her being. Loves her with a certainty that warms her soul and makes her feel as though she were lit from within.

When Nico’s hand caresses Karolina’s face, the taller girl leans into the touch, eyes closed and serene smile on her face.

“Let’s deal with the end of the world, and then we can end this with a bang,” Nico tries for cocky, but knows she probably sounds more giddy and fond.

It doesn’t matter, because Karolina is endlessly indulgent. 

“With a bang, huh?” Karolina chuckles lightly. Her expression is warm, and then then steely with determination in the next. The transformation is a sight to behold. “I’ll go and make sure Alex doesn’t crash.”

“And, I’ll go find the others. Make sure they’re okay,” Nico agrees, reaching for Karolina’s hand to give it a squeeze. Be careful.

“Be safe, Nico.” Karolina squeezes her hand back, a flash of worry in her gaze.

Nico offers a smile, and a kiss, a languishing promise of later to come. “Kick ass, babe.”

They grin at each other.

Yeah, sure, fucking aliens have decided to invade the earth again. But it’s Thursday, and it’s Nico’s birthday, and she’s sure there’s more to come in their lives.

Hehe.

More to come.

Yeah, today’s definitely ending with a bang.