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When they told you a surgery won’t really help, you gave up on the idea: why bother? You focused on learning sign language and how to read lips; you had to since you’re one of The Joker’s trusted bodyguards. How else are you going to communicate? You can’t have people yell at you all day long in order for you to kind of understand what is being said.
At first, you had a hard time controlling your voice; you were unable to really hear yourself anymore so you kept on being loud without wanting to be. J used to pucker his lips and say:
“You’re giving me a headache!”
You knew why.
“Sorry, Mister J,” you would apologize and took it down a notch. However, his complaints helped you control the tone and intensity of your voice until it wasn’t a problem anymore.
Frost was the one that volunteered to learn sign language from you. The Joker ordered you to teach him. What’s the difference?
Jonny said:
“Y/N, can you teach me too?”
The Joker said:
“Y/N, show me how that crap works. NOW!!!!”
Your boss forbade anybody else in the crew to learn sign language besides him and Frost. He believes this is an ability he can use for his own gain and the less people know, the better it is. Comes in handy, that’s for sure. You are a skilled, resourceful woman, renowned for being fierce and untamable; you don’t take shit from anybody. Except from your boss, of course. Because, you know, he’s The Joker.
And even him got used to your way of dealing with things; you are so direct and impulsive. It doesn’t even bother him anymore. But it used to.
In meetings, Mister J has Frost usually stand behind him and you stand behind the guests, scrutinizing and watching things, making sure nothing bad happens. You always discretely sign him what you notice and he signs back when he wants something done.
“Two guns and one knife on each,” you sign him right now, seeing some extra weapons on his three guests you are not too comfortable with.
“Keep an eye on them,” he signs back since the guys are counting money, too immersed in their task to care about anything else.
“Say, Mister Joker,” Nex grins, smelling a bundle of hundred dollar bills, “she’s not so tough anymore, ha?” and that stupid wink he gives Frost and J displeases both recipients. You can’t see because you are behind the three assholes; that’s why they are trying to make fun of you now.
The famous Y/N, not that perfect anymore.
“Deaf as a door knob, hm?”
You realize Jonny and your boss suddenly changed their facial expression: they seem annoyed.
“Shut your mouth!” Frost utters through his clenched teeth and you can’t read his lips since they are not really moving.
“Wha’, she’s your girlfriend or something?” Jason teases. “Sorry, I didn’t know.”
“Y/N !!” The Joker raises his hand a bit and snaps his fingers to get your attention. He has a plan that involves him doing nothing and the rude guests will still pay for the offense. Plus, it will be a fun show to watch. It always is.
“Yes, sir?”
The Joker speaks and signs in the same time:
“Nex here says you are deaf as a door knob. Is that true?”
“What?!” you crack your neck, irritated.
“Yes, they are all laughing at your…unfortunate disability. I wasn’t aware you had one,” he wickedly smirks while he sees the jerks squirming in their sits: they didn’t expect that. Since you’re the only woman there, the idiots assumed all the guys will get together and laugh at your expense. Stupid newbies have no idea The Joker doesn’t like others ridicule things he doesn’t consider funny. You being practically deaf is not on your boss’s “funny list”.
“I’m not deaf as a door knob!” you step towards the three men, rotating your fighting rings on your fingers. “I just can’t hear, alright?!” They didn’t even have time to distinguish the sarcasm before the first punch landed. Last thing they saw was The King of Gotham signing something to you. They didn’t know what I meant, but you did:
“Told you those will come in handy.”
– Yes, the fighting rings. Your boss gave them to you last week when you went to the penthouse to pick up ammo for a robbery.
“Here, Doll, these are for you. They will create more damage in a fight,” J slid the rings on your fingers: 3 on the right hand and 2 on the left hand.
“Mister J, can you please stop calling me Doll? It sounds really close to “Dull” and I’m not boring,” you whined and he hated it.
“You’re pissing me off, Y/N!” he muttered and you couldn’t read his lips because of his clenched jaw.
“Huh? What was that?”
And before he repeated you examined your rings and had another complaint:
“What’s with the shiny stones?!”
He lifted your chin up so you can look at him.
“They’re diamonds.”
“I don’t like diamonds, Mister J, you know that,” and that didn’t go well with him.
“I don’t care, OK?! It is an honor to receive a gift from me so stop your bickering!!!!” J yelled so loud you sort of heard the words. “They’ll come in handy so stop aggravating me!!”
Yep, it was time to shut it down and you did.
But he didn’t stop calling you Doll. Every time he calls you that, his lips say Doll but he signs for “Dull,” this way he can tease you, aware there is nothing you can do about it.
You have to admit you kind of brought this one upon yourself…
***************
You are driving J back to the penthouse in his favorite silver SUV. Frost and the others stayed behind to clean up the mess after you were done with the pricks; he helped kicking their ass also since he got really mad at what they implied about his best friend. The Joker kept the money and the merchandise. Who would dare question that? Not the three moron newbies.
You watch The Joker in the rear-view mirror. He’s thinking about something, staring at the darkness outside the window. You really like that white suit on him; he rarely wears the color.
No better time than now, you conclude and slowly pull over, coming to a halt.
You get up and squeeze in between the sits to go in the back and stay at his feet, this way you can see him better.
“Are we being followed?” he turns his head and you didn’t hear him, of course. You see his Adam’s apple move so you know he’s talking.
You slightly touch his face to turn it towards you.
“I can’t hear you, sir.”
“Are we being followed?” he repeats and now you understand.
“No, we’re good.”
“Then why did we stop? I’m tired, I need to get home.”
“I have to talk to you, Mister J.”
“About what?” he inquires, intrigued.
“Sir, I’ve been watching you for a while…”
“Yeah, that’s your job, Y/N,” he interrupts, licking his teeth.
“True. But there’s another reason.”
The Joker glares at you, suspicions, and you continue.
“You know I’m picky with men…”
“You don’t say!” he sarcastically scoffs, aware of your reputation; the stories out there, plus what he witnessed himself.
You crawl a few inches closer to him. Now your long, rainbow colored hair touches his knees.
“I know I’m pretty…”
“You are, so?!” he cuts you off again, more and more puzzled about where this is going.
“Here’s the thing, Mister J: before my biological clock starts ticking, I would really like to have about 4 kids. I believe I would be an awesome mom.”
“Huh?!” he grinds his jaw sideways, completely lost.
“After careful consideration, I think your DNA and chromosomes are the best I can find. I want you to be the father of my children. What do you think?”
“What… … … the hell, Y/N?” he frowns, taken aback by this new idea of yours.
“Is that a yes?” you smile, hopeful for the confirmation.
“No, it’s not a yes ! Where do you get these insane concepts from?!” The Joker rolls his eyes, and starts signing also in order to emphasize his feelings.
“Ummm, but what am I supposed to do? Die childless ?! You’re the best candidate: you’re handsome and a genius; I’m smart and pretty. Our kids would be amazing, don’t you think?”
J sighs, shaking his head in denial. His face comes really close to yours, fed up with the speech:
“Just drive, Y/N, and leave me alone. I’m not very patient tonight.”
You sulk, hurt by his rejection and silently creep back in the driver’s sit, twisting the keys in the contact.
So like, he’s not going to land his DNA and chromosomes to anybody?! Or he just doesn’t want to land them to me? you think, upset.
“Wow, that was a trip. Crazy Doll,” The Joker mumbles in the back sit and you didn’t hear it, of course.
You are both aware your stubborn ass won’t let that go easily.
*****************
Yep, since you decided you want his DNA, you watch him like a hawk. Suddenly, after being around him for so long, you find yourself jealous at any other woman that tries to flirt with The Prince of Crime. It didn’t bother you before.
– You circle the VIP room, glaring at Nessa who had the nerve to flutter her eyelashes at him all night. The Joker left for a few minutes in order to finish some black market transactions on his laptop.
You abruptly go and hop on the table in front of her, trapping Nessa in between your legs.
“If you keep on looking at the father of my children that way, you’re not going to make it to your car after you get out of here,” you threaten with a murderous sparkle in your eyes.
“What?! What are you talking about?” and she turns around to see if there is anybody else in the room. Nope, just you and her, no help coming.
“I can’t hear you,” you forcefully turn her mug towards you again. “What did you say?”
“Wh-what are you talking about?… I didn’t know you and Mister Joker had kids.”
“We don’t !!” you shout; you don’t have to hear yourself in order to go up a few octanes.“Not yet! But we will, so keep your junk at home or I swear I am going to kill you. You know me, I don’t fuck around!! Understand?!”
Nessa gulps, confused and startled. You dig your nails in her flawless face and she winces in pain.
“Got it, got it,” she sniffles as The Joker comes back in the VIP room.
“What’s going on?” he signs you and you sign him back, jumping off the table:
“Girl talk, just catching up.”
– He knows. Rumors are spreading around and now you exert your possessiveness even in front of him. Last night, for example, you were circling the hideout while he was conversing with Jenna. She’s a smuggler that J uses from time to time. She was giggling at everything he was saying, shamelessly flirting and oh my God, she dared touch his jacket in order to fix his collar!!!!
You were so fast slamming her against the wall, totally took the both of them by surprise. You started choking her with your elbow, pressing your body against hers as she was wiggling to escape.
“This is the father of my children, you bitch! Why are you touching him?!”
Your boss had to forcibly pull you away from Jenna and she slid down to the floor, coughing up her lungs.
“What are you doing, hm?” he cupped your face so you can look at him and read his lips.
You were panting, enraged and not glad he intervened; didn’t make a sound, just stared at him, frustrated.
“Are you done now???? YES??? I am ordering you to cut it out and stop telling people I’m the father of your children, ok?” and J got really mad. He would have loved to break your neck, yet you are so useful.
So he didn’t…
But that hurt your feelings. Badly. All because you want his DNA and chromosomes.Otherwise, you wouldn’t give a damn.
– When The Joker ended up at Arkham, of course the whole crew and the extra muscle you hired went to get him out.
“Where is the father of my children?” was the question you asked every single security guard that you found alive after the carnage.
“W-who?”
“I can’t hear you, look at me!!” and they had to do as told.
“Who?!” and you were able to read the lips.
“The father of my children: The Joker!!!!!!!!!!!! Where is he?!”
“Th-that way!” someone finally pointed in the correct direction. Your boss wasn’t very far and he heard you screaming all over the place. He actually banged his head against the bars, vexed.
“Stop calling me that !!!!!!!!” he yelled but of course you didn’t hear him.
His anger melted a bit when you ended up in front of his cell with the eeriest smile he ever saw. (besides his, of course)
“Hello, sir!” you signed instead of talking.“How’s your DNA? All good?”
“Uhhhhh,” J exhaled, resigned, tightening up the string to his Arkham sweatpants. “Give me a break, woman!”
He heard the steps of the mercenaries getting closer and he saw how eager you were to get him out of there.
“My DNA is fine,” J decided to humor you and signed back with the answer. You smirked, relieved:
“Thank God!”
***************
You were captured by Gotham’s police while on a heist with your crew and they took you in for briefing. They wanted to transfer you over to Belle Reve in the morning but they never fulfilled their plan.
The Joker came to get you. Frost and his henchmen cleared the path and he had to ask the ones that were left alive:
“That woman that requires my DNA, where is she?”
“W-who?”
“Y/N !!!! Where is she?”
“Th-that way!” somebody signaled and he found your incarceration chamber. You kind of jumped when you saw him standing there; you didn’t hear a thing from the entire ruckus.
“Hi, Doll,” his lips uttered but his hands signed for “Dull”.
“Hi, Mister J,” you approached the bars, pretending not to notice his taunting and that strange smile flourished on your lips.
“Stop being creepy, woman!” he eyeballed you, gesturing for Frost to come over with the electric saw.
***************
You don’t feel well. You are trying to tough it out at the meeting but it’s hard to pretend you’re OK. The Joker noticed and signed you to go sit down. You just signed back:
“I’m alright,” but your uncomfortable grimace of pain shows otherwise.
Cassidy saw J using the sign language to communicate. As always, you are behind the guest so he turns his head towards you, checking you out for a few seconds then faces your boss again. Just the three of you in the room.
“Mister Joker, is it me or Y/N gained a few pounds?” he leans over and whispers.
“You can talk normal, she can’t hear you,” J bites on his lip but the fool can’t get the warning. “And if you don’t turn towards her she can’t read your lips.”
“I know, but one can never be too cautious,” Cassidy winks and persists with his crap.” I personally don’t like it when somebody gains weight, especially a woman. Deaf and with a few extra pounds,” he snickers, accomplice with J. Or so he believes.
“And why the hell do I care if she gained a few pounds?! Her skills are the same, that doesn’t affect what she’s capable of,” The Joker mutters and you can’t read his lips because they are not moving too much.
The Joker doesn’t like others ridicule things he doesn’t consider funny. The fact that you gained a bit of weight is not on your boss’s “funny list”.
“Strange…For being who she is you would think she would take better care of herself,” the fool laughs, thrilled at his own comments.
“She’s pregnant,” J informs, sucking on his teeth. “Of course she gained a few pounds.”
“Holy… SHIT!” Cassidy’s jaw drops to the floor. “Are you serious?!”
J nods a yes.
“Fuck me, she’s so feral and crazy!! Who the hell can handle her? Who’s the son of a bitch that would dare impregnate her?! I feel sorry for the…the… the…” and Cassidy starts stuttering when The Joker gives him the most psychotic stare he can muster. Cassidy freezes. “Oooh…Oh…” he finally gets it. “ I’m so, soooo sorry, Mister Joker, I had no idea that…”
“Hey, Y/N !!!” J raises his hand and snaps his fingers so you can focus on him. He begins signing and talking in the same time. “Cassidy here says you’re fat !” J maliciously grins and the prick squirms in his chair, starting to sweat. He didn’t expect this twist.
“What ?!” you crack your shoulders, pissed.
Your boss doesn’t have to do anything else now except relax and enjoy the show. He always likes it when you lose control.
Last thing Cassidy sees is The King of Gotham signing something to you. He doesn’t know what it means but you do:
“The asshole said you gained weight on top of being deaf too.”
The last thing Cassidy hears is your angry voice in his ear:
“I got the best DNA I could find for my kids and nobody is making fun of that!!”
“Damn right!” The Joker huffs, placing his legs up on the desk.
The last thing you see before you start is J saying:
“Another one with no manners, Doll,” but his hands sign the word “Dull.”
You really have to admit you brought this one upon yourself.