Work Text:
“Medicine.”
Jeff handed the bottle to Clint, who opened it and poured the blue liquid between Ben’s chapped lips.
The boy lying on what appeared to be a bed arched, clenching his fists on the grey sheets, his whole body stiffening under the pain. The veins of his neck and his arms were standing out against his paper-thin skin, and a terrifying, grief-struck scream escaped his dry mouth.
Clint closed his eyes shut and frowned as if he were in pain himself as the howl echoed through the shack and the whole Glade. There was no doubt everyone had heard it.
The former Builder suddenly stopped screaming and curled up on himself, shaking, mouth open in a silent scream of terror. Clint finally opened his eyes and muttered darkly:
“I thought it could work.”
His co-worker walked to him and grabbed the flask from his hand and set it down on the shelf. He turned around to face the Keeper of the med-jacks, and said softly:
“We’ve already given him the injection. There’s nothing we can do more to help him go through the Changing, you know that.”
“Of course I do. But I can’t stand watching him suffer like that. It’s my job to ease his pain, Jeff!”
“You tried, Clint. That’s also your job.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Clint mumbled.
He glanced at Ben, whose eyes were wide open and yet weren’t looking at anything, and let out a defeated sigh.
Jeff was silently watching him, a grave look on his face. Of course he understood how he felt. He couldn’t stand being so helpless to the Changing either.
They should have grown used to witnessing the casualties and horrors being a med-jack threw their way, but taking care of a stung Glader wasn’t trivial. The only other one had been Gally, and he still hadn’t fully recovered. Jeff was afraid he might actually never do. Therefore it wouldn’t be a surprise for Ben to end up like him. That’s what Clint feared: that he might not be able to save him.
That’s why he would spend so much time trying to create a drug to ease his pain, to prevent Ben’s mind from breaking completely, even if it meant staying up all night mixing potions and grinding herbs.
Jeff had no skills in herbal medicine and admired the Keeper, he truly did, but watching him try so hard to eventually fail made his heart ache. His efforts were vain and it wasn’t fair. The only thing Jeff had then decided he could do was to support and help Clint no matter what, no matter how. And judging by the boy’s gloomy expression, support was definitely what he needed right now.
Jeff crossed his arms and ordered:
“Clint, go to sleep. I’ll look after Ben for tonight.”
The Keeper jumped as he was already dozing off, and before he could protest Jeff added:
“You’ve been up for two nights straight, how can you even hope to achieve anything in your state? Just…let me do it, okay?”
Clint sighed and scratched his head, rubbed his face and mumbled:
“Yeah… Thanks, Jeff.”
He turned back once he had made his way to the door, glanced at him as if he were about to add something:
“Jeff-…”
“Yeah?” he quirked an eyebrow, waiting for that stubborn kid to finally go to bed.
“…’night.” the Keeper finally answered, although it didn’t quite sound like what he had wanted to say.
When Clint came back the next morning to check on how the night had gone, the first thing he saw was Ben quietly sleeping on the bed. His pale, almost translucent skin showed his dark blue veins, and he was awfully skinny, but at least his eyes seemed to be closed in a rather peaceful way.
His gaze then wandered around the room, and stopped at Jeff’s shape sitting asleep against the wall. The Keeper moved slowly towards him, he didn’t want to wake him up because the boy’s face looked so serene, his head resting on his right shoulder, all his muscles relaxed.
Clint approached a bit more and knelt down so he could put a hand on Jeff’s shoulder, when his co-worker suddenly woke up. Jeff flinched noticing how close he was, then ran a hand through his hair and cleared his throat before apologising:
“H-hum, sorry, I think I fell asleep…”
“Yes, I saw that.” Clint tried to joke but to Jeff it sounded like a reproach.
“But Ben’s alright, I assure you!” he defended himself. “Actually it seems that your medicine took effect thirty minutes after drinking it. He calmed down and-…”
Jeff cut himself off when a relieved smile appeared on Clint’s face. Yes, it had worked, and Clint could be proud of himself.
“I knew you could do it.”
“Thanks…” Clint nodded, trying not to stare at the bright smile Jeff was giving him.
“Your efforts are finally paying off-…” Jeff’s words died on his lips when Clint grabbed his wrist, looking at him as if he was about to talk.
But as he opened his mouth, a loud noise rumbled through the whole Glade, startling both of them. The Keeper released his grip. Jeff blinked:
“It’s the Box.”
They rushed out of the shack, forcing the events of the last minute to the back of their minds, focusing on the crowd that was gathering around the large hole and on the siren that suddenly shut off when the Box reached the ground level.
They unconsciously stayed away from each other while the Greenie was pulled out of the hole.
Jeff was checking on Newt’s limp when the blond asked:
“Where’s Clint?”
“I have no idea.” he replied soflty.
“You don’t know where he is?” as if that was weird.
“Should I?”
“…Did you argue or something?” Newt inquired, suspicious.
“Why, no, we didn’t…”
It was indeed not like they had. But Jeff knew he looked awkward, because he himself wasn’t sure of what had actually happened. He didn’t feel comfortable being around Clint right now.
“You’re done, shank?” Minho was waiting for Newt at the door.
“What are you, my mum?”
“No, but I kinda want to hold you like that.” he brushed off as he slid an arm around Newt’s shoulder and helped him stand better.
“You shuck-face.” his friend retorted although he couldn’t help a grin from curling his lips.
The med-jack had a slight smile at the obvious couple, and a scream burst out from the upper floor.
He rushed to Ben’s room, Minho and Newt in tow.
The former Builder was no longer sleeping. His fists were so clenched that his dirty nails were digging into his palms, the muscles of his neck tensed to the point of rupturing, and he was screaming, his body shaken by uncontrolled spasms, excruciating pain carved on his face as if by knife stabs.
Jeff and Minho forced Ben to stay down on the bed from which he was attempting to get up, only moved by this teeth-gritting pain, while Newt was tying the bed straps around his wrists.
“What the shuck is going on-…!”
Clint entered the room, froze for a split second before rushing to the shelf and frantically scrambling for the right bottle. He was about to have Ben drink it when they heard a noise come from downstairs, and Newt ran to stop the Greenie who was climbing up the stairs.
“No Thomas, you can’t get in! I don’t bloody care if you heard a scream, it’s none of your business! We’re busy in here-”
But the Greenie didn’t listen and peeked through the door. Ben saw him.
It seemed to act on him like an electroshock. His eyes rolled furiously in their sockets as if they were going to fall out, and he violently punched the bed frame with his free hand, breaking wood. Minho released him to force Thomas away, leaving the two med-jacks in control of the situation.
Clint didn’t waste a second and poured the blue liquid into Ben’s wide-open mouth then tied the remaining straps around his free limbs to finally have him immobilised.
Ben had stopped screaming from exhaustion. He was now whimpering, tears running down his cringing face.
Clint took a deep breath, wiping sweat from his forehead. Jeff glared at him:
“Where have you been?”
“Doesn’t matter.” the Keeper dodged but his co-worker wouldn’t have it.
“For shuck’s sake it does! I-…we needed you here!!” he insisted. “You’re the Keeper, aren’t you?!”
“Yes, and you’re a med-jack…” Clint held a hand to his forehead. “Listen, I’m sorry. I should have been here. But I think you handled this very well.” it wasn’t like Jeff had needed him there.
“…Whatever.” Jeff now looked embarrassed to have been so upset, and shuffled his feet.
“So” he hesitated, “I’ve found some herbs I was hoping to experiment with so it could knock Ben out right after he drank it.”
“Okay.”
It wasn’t like he was needed for that kind of task. Clint was the expert on making medicine, and Jeff was specialised in treating physical injuries. They complemented each other, but there was nothing Jeff could do to help Clint with what he was already the best at.
“…So I was wondering if you’d like to…lend me a hand?” Clint tried.
“Really?” Jeff’s eyes widened in surprise.
“Yeah, I thought you could, uh…learn about it and stuff…” he scratched his head.
“I’d like to. Are you sure it doesn’t bother you?”
“No problem. I’m sure you’ll be of great help.”
“I’m here for that after all, ain’t I?” the smile Jeff gave him made his heart skip a beat.
They then had found themselves sitting at the same table with plenty of herbs, empty flasks and scissors ready to be used. For a while, Clint showed Jeff how to separate the useful parts of some plants from the others, teaching him what to look for and how to use the scissors in a way that wouldn’t waste too much of the ingredient. Jeff was docilely taking all the information in, although he couldn’t help but shoot side glances at the Keeper regularly. The boy always looked very focused and calm when he was working on his remedies, and Jeff smiled fondly at that sight.
Clint was focusing on properly cutting a long root when Jeff, coming to sit back down, accidentally dropped the mixture Clint had asked him to fetch onto his face.
“Oh shuck!” he quickly apologised to the now green-faced boy. “I’m so sorry Clint, I’ll get you cleaned up and-…why are you laughing?”
“It’s ok, it’s ok! It’s just, you’re acting like I’m going to have the skin ripped off my face by this stuff!” Clint was holding his sides in response to the panicked med-jack. “I made it, there’s nothing dangerous in it.”
Jeff sighed in relief and quickly brought a wet rag that he applied to the Keeper’s face.
“Still,” he added as he wiped up a tear of laughter from his eye “did you trip or something?”
“No!” Jeff dodged, still embarrassed and holding the piece of cloth away from his face for a moment. “I was just a bit…distracted…”
“By what?”
“Nothing!” he brusquely covered Clint’s eyes under the rag to avoid his gaze, and silence fell between them as he rubbed the mixture off his face.
But he couldn’t keep doing that forever, and once he was done Clint was staring at him. He grabbed his wrist and his co-worker averted his eyes.
“Hey Jeff, it’s okay. I’m not mad at you or anything, really.”
Jeff wanted to scream that it wasn’t why he was avoiding him, but he bit his lip. He was feeling very stupid. So he just did a stupid thing: he splashed the wet rag onto Clint’s face.
“SPLAT”
Removing the cloth that had just slapped him in the middle of his face, Clint blinked profusely before curling his lips into an evil grin:
“You meant to do that, didn’t you?” and he threw the rag back at Jeff.
One minute later, they were both fighting like children, grabbing and tossing various bottles at each other, staining each other with powders and laughing out loud. They paused a moment to catch their breath and stared at each other’s face before bursting into laughter again. They were covered in some green-ish, gummy substance, looking absolutely ridiculous.
Their eyes met, and their laughter died as they both swallowed hard, Clint biting his lip, and Jeff eventually gave in:
“S-shouldn’t we work..?”
“Y-yeah…” Clint agreed once he had recovered the capacity to speak.
They then returned to some more serious work, trying to ignore their hearts beating fast in their ribcages.
When he woke up the next morning, Clint thought he was still dreaming. Jeff and him were still sitting at the same table, several ingredients pushed aside so they could rest their heads on the wood. They apparently had fallen asleep after a few hours of work.
The Keeper smiled at his co-worker’s sleeping face, when he remembered what had happened earlier. He bit his lower lip, trying to put it out of his mind. In front of him stood a bottle full of a clear reddish liquid, and he also remembered:
“Jeff!” he shook the boy up. “We did it! We’ve found a cure for Ben!”
He didn’t wait as Jeff rubbed his eyes, shaking off the sleep, and he dashed to the first floor, dragging him by the wrist.
When he opened the door, excited to use their new-found painkiller, horror dawned on him. Turning back to Jeff, who was still confused, he looked at him with panic in his eyes and a knot of fear in his stomach.
“Ben’s gone.”
“You’re okay?” Clint was sombre.
“Are you?” Jeff asked in the same tone.
“Never felt this bad.”
The Keeper let out a deep sigh and rubbed his arms as if he were cold. The past hours had been the worst of his life.
After attacking Thomas, Ben had been banished. They had forced a Glader, one of their own, into the Maze knowing fully he wouldn’t stand a chance. Knowing he would die. And it was their fault. The exact opposite of what a med-jack should do.
And Jeff apparently felt the same, judging by the dark look on his face.
“Clint…” he mumbled, and yet averted his gaze.
“…Yes?”
“I think that… I should quit being a med-jack.”
That made Clint flinch.
“What are you talking about?” his voice shook, and Jeff hung his head.
“I can’t make remedies. Yesterday I completely messed up and distracted you. I fell asleep when I was supposed to look after Ben, and I’m of no use to you.”
Clint shook the red bottle under his nose.
“Jeff, we made this together! You’re the one who knows all about anatomy and who’s always tending wounds! You’re learning so fast and-…”
“Stop it!” Jeff clenched his fists. “Stop it, okay? I-… It’s my fault Ben is dead.”
The Keeper’s heart sank.
“What are you talking about?”
“I-…I shouldn’t have fallen asleep with you last night, I should have had kept an eye on Ben, I should have-…I should have…” Jeff gritted his teeth, eyes bright with angry tears.
“Jeff, no…Come on,” Clint pleaded. “I’m as guilty as you. And I’m the Keeper, so I’m even more responsible.”
“I’m not of any help to you, there’s no denying it.” the boy smiled sadly. “I’m a bad med-jack.”
“No.” the Keeper grabbed both of his wrists. “No, I cannot let you say that. You’re everything but that, Jeff.”
He forced himself to look at him in the eye and firmly asserted:
“You’re the one who knows how to disinfect and treat wounds, how to tie and change bandages, how to put a cast, how to heal a broken bone.” Before Jeff could object, he continued and he couldn’t believe he was saying that aloud: “You’re always there for me. You always have my back. It’s you who gives me courage to stay up all night. It’s you who makes me happy to work. Because you’re here, I can do things I wouldn’t be able to if I were alone. I need you to stay here, Jeff, I-…”
As he was speaking, he had seized his co-worker by the shoulders and his face was now three inches apart from his. He didn’t even care about how awkward it was, he had only spoken the truth. He didn’t want Jeff to go, to leave him alone.
His heart was pounding loudly in his chest, and it wasn’t only due to the energetic speech he’d given. Jeff was so close it made his ears ring and his mouth dry. He could feel his warm skin under his fingers, his soft breath on his lips, his dark eyes watching him in a gaze that made his head spin.
Clint clenched his jaw, praying for the other not to notice how hard he was staring at his lips.
Jeff looked confused and embarrassed, eyes running from the Keeper’s face to his hands, he whispered:
“Clint…”
“W-what…?” he stammered, trying to focus on something else rather than on how fast his stupid heart was beating.
“Thank you.” the med-jack smiled and Clint felt butterflies flutter all over his stomach.
“…No problem.” he managed to mumble, far too aware of how sappy he had sounded.
He had to bite his lip when Jeff flushed a bit and stuttered:
“And-…”
“Whoa, am I interrupting something?”
A mocking yet surprised voice cut off, and the two med-jacks jumped away from each other to glare at Minho who had entered the shack without them noticing.
“Don’t be a shank,” Clint snapped, feeling extremely disappointed “What do you want?”
“Whaat, were you two busy?” the Runner grinned. “Whatever. I wanted to tell you we’re having a meeting tonight, y’know, all the Keepers. Be there, shuk-face.” he looked at Clint.
The Keeper glanced at Jeff who had frowned and crossed his arms, probably vexed to be left out, and he gave Minho a brief nod.
“Well,” Minho smirked, enjoying this far too much. “Imma leave you two alone now, don’t worry.”
“Minho?” a voice came from behind him and Newt stepped in. “What are you doing here?”
“Just passed by to warn Clint about the meeting.”
“I was going to!” the blond clicked his tongue. “That’s my job!”
“Yeah, but I run faster.” Minho teased, and Newt gave him a slap on the arm.
“Let them be.” Clint stopped Jeff who was about to separate the two who had started bickering like an old couple. “They’ll argue a bit then make out a lot… What?” he asked at the med-jack’s startled face. “Isn’t that what couples do?”
“You sure do know a lot about being a couple.” Jeff mocked him as Newt and Minho left out the shack already holding hands.
“Oh, because you do?”
“Neither do I,” he admitted “Though I wish I did…”
Jeff wanted to slap himself.
“It’ll eventually happen to you someday-…” the Keeper carelessly reassured him, before realising how stupid it was.
And Jeff apparently thought the same, judging by the puzzled look on his face.
“I mean, uh… There must be someone who likes you, uh… Probably…”
Clint wanted to disappear right that instant! Why wouldn’t the ground open up and swallow him, he thought in despair. But Jeff only buried him deeper in his embarrassment as he seemed to blush and replied with a light chuckle:
“Thank you… I guess?”
“So, uh…” Clint ran a hand through his hair, feeling like a pathetic twelve-year-old unable to flirt-…flirt? “…Did you change your mind? You’re staying?”
“Yes, thanks to you.” Jeff smiled.
“Well, I’m… I’m glad you’re staying.” the Keeper spoke before he could think. “I mean, I wouldn’t have liked working without you…Err, I mean, it would have been too much work for me, no wait-…”
“Clint.” the other suddenly cut him off, and Clint was relieved he didn’t have to keep on digging his hole deeper. “What you said before…you know, when I said I wanted to quit…You, uh…meant it?”
“Y-yeah, I did… I guess…” Clint averted his eyes.
“I didn’t know you cared about me so much.” Jeff noted, and before his co-worker could protest, he added: “I mean, that’s fine by me…! I-it kinda touched me actually… So, uh…” he hesitated, fiddled with the hem of his shirt. “I will do my best to help you.”
Clint jumped at those words, and their eyes finally met. Jeff cracked a smile: “Thank you.”
Surprisingly, Clint didn’t die right away. Instead, he felt as if a silent, deep message was exchanged between them.
A few days went by. And with them, discrete, small, quite insignificant things.
Clint resting his head on Jeff’s shoulder a little longer than necessary. Their fingers brushing more often when Jeff handed Clint a bottle of medicine. Their eyes meeting more often even though they weren’t talking. Their silences filling with more embarrassment and impatience. Jeff finishing Clint’s sentences without even concerting. Their faces blushing at each other’s smiles.
Insignificant yet meaningful little things to Clint, who couldn’t have helped but think about his behaviour. He liked Jeff, he really did. And they were working so well together, everyone told him, the Keeper and his med-jack. But was he seriously flirting with him? Granted, he liked seeing the boy blush whenever he smiled at him, the way Jeff had to make his heart skip a beat whenever he glanced at Clint, how he bit his lip whenever they were too close-…
“Clint, how about I mix those?” Jeff’s voice cut him off, startling him.
“Ah, uhm…” Clint glanced at the med-jack who was holding two bottles of blue and green medicine, then frowned once he had pulled himself together. “Wait, why would you do that?”
“You know, I thought it could be something to drink to build up stamina in the Maze. Maybe the Runners would need it.”
“Oh, yeah, sounds like a good idea. But you have to be careful with the dosing.”
“How much? I’d say about 5 fl oz, is that right?” Jeff brandished the blue bottle.
“Wait…” the Keeper quickly closed his eyes to count. “Yeah, exactly! How did you know?”
“Guess I’m good at maths,” the med-jack shrugged.
“You’ve improved a lot. I’m impressed.”
“Oh, uh… Thanks.” he ran a hand through his hair, and Clint found him adorable. “But I’m still no match for you.”
“Please, you’re as good as I am, and I couldn’t manage without you.”
“I’m just doing my job.” Jeff seemed to blush and averted his eyes. “I’m your co-worker…”
“Sometimes I wish you were more than that.” the Keeper muttered to himself.
“What did you say?”
“Nothing, I’m an idiot.” he mumbled and raised his gaze.
“No, you’re not. What makes you say that-…” Jeff’s words were blown away when he realised Clint was intently staring at him.
“I…can’t help but think about you all the time.” Clint began before he could think. “And I’m really…glad that you’re here, but… It’s not what I actually…want. Shuck, that’s pathetic.” he let out an apologetic laugh.
“I mean… I like you, Jeff. I really do.”
And although he had been staring at him this whole time, he hadn’t noticed Jeff was still holding the bottle. Bottle that he dropped to the ground in surprise. The sound of the glass shattering made him realise his fingers were now slightly bleeding.
The Keeper rushed to him, and looked around for something to press the wound with. But they were on the second floor, and all the band-aids were kept downstairs. Having failed to find anything, Clint eventually chose to rip the lower part of his t-shirt and applied it to the cut.
Jeff finally blinked and whispered:
“Clint…”
“Nevermind that.” he abruptly cut him off. “That was stupid.”
“Clint.”
“Here, hold that.” he ignored as he let go of the piece of fabric to head downstairs.
“Clint, for shuck’s sake.”
Jeff’s voice froze him in his tracks. He didn’t want to turn around, though, his face was burning with embarrassment and he felt his throat starting to close up.
But the boy walked to him and stopped in his back. He could hear him near his ear:
“It’s just a cut. Don’t get so worked up over it.”
Clint smiled weakly. He wasn’t the expert on injuries! Still with his back to him, he muttered:
“Sorry. I just really thought I had messed up.”
“You didn’t mess anything up.” Jeff slid over to face him. Clint timidly looked up at him.
Neither of them knew how they had found themselves that close, but there they were, staring deeply in each other’s eyes, their burning, hesitant breath on each other’s skin, and their hearts throbbing so loudly in their ears it was impossible to ignore.
Clint reached out a tentative hand to his friend’s face, and Jeff didn’t step back. Everything seemed frozen in time and yet it couldn’t have felt any more vivid. They weren’t aware of anything beside of the other in front of them, of the butterflies in their stomachs, of the silent and deep tension linking their bodies so close yet so far.
Words were unspoken, because they weren’t of any use. There was nothing more to say when Clint kissed Jeff.
And as soon as he touched those soft, warm lips, it became obvious that they had both wished for it for so long. Butterflies flew away and changed into fireworks as the Keeper grabbed the nape of the boy who was no longer just a co-worker, whose arms circled his shoulders, and Jeff started to kiss him back.
They weren’t only med-jacks anymore, but it would still always be the two of them.