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Jesse finished folding his last shirt and tucked it away in a dresser. Whenever they went away together on long-term Official Business, Hanzo insisted on fully unpacking as long as they had the amenities to do so. That didn’t change for vacations either, apparently. An amused little smile had been pasted on Jesse’s face from the moment they had arrived in their hotel room in the Maldives, and Hanzo had not noticed it when he immediately began unpacking his bag with his usual singular focus. Naturally, Hanzo had finished first and now lurked at the window looking out to their private beach. His shoulders were up and tense – Jesse slid up behind him and ran knuckles down the valley of his partner’s spine to make him unclench. He leant in to plant a kiss on Hanzo’s ear from behind as well before pulling him into his chest.
“You like it?” Jesse asked.
“Yes,” Hanzo purred.
“Everything you wanted?”
“And then some.”
“Good."
They remained in place for a while longer, passively enjoying the view as well as the first moment of true and complete privacy they’d had in months. Though they had their own quarters, the threat of an interruption for casual or professional reasons always loomed. Not a goddamn thing was going to bother them here. Jesse had been by turns stoked and nervous about that fact for weeks before the trip. For...Reasons. He snuck another kiss to the side of Hanzo’s neck, making his partner arch and chuckle low and rumbling just the way Jesse loved most.
“We haven’t even been here an hour,” Hanzo chided, but Jesse could tell it was half-assed at best.
“Correction: we’ve been here a whole thirty minutes. We only have twelve days here, sugar, and I wanna break the bed at least once without a shade of guilt about it.”
“You thirsty bastard,” Hanzo replied, laughing as Jesse followed up by blowing a raspberry against his neck. He turned in Jesse’s arms to swat at him properly before contenting himself with touching their foreheads together. “Well then, make your demands,” he continued, voice husky and hips swaying. But Jesse didn’t reciprocate the invitation to dance in place and suddenly grew quiet, almost...sheepish. Hanzo smoothed his hands up Jesse’s chest in reassurance.
“What’s this? Since when have you ever been bashful?” he asked, deliberately gentle, but Jesse nonetheless hesitated in their embrace – now Hanzo was genuinely concerned. “Tell me, love. What is wrong?”
“Nothin’, nothin’,” Jesse mumbled, head down and staring towards the floor at nothing. “I just...I do have a request. I thought if I came at it with a running start, I’d do better asking, and uh...I didn’t.”
“You know there is nothing you cannot tell me, Jesse.” Hanzo backed off just enough to take Jesse’s hands and hold them to his chest in emphasis. “It is only you and I, here. Whatever you wish, I will endeavor to make happen. I love you; I would never--”
“I kinda wanna be spanked,” Jesse spat out almost too fast for Hanzo to understand him. Hanzo leant back, face scrunched in concentration as he caught up.
“Really?” Jesse certainly loved being submissive, but anything corporeal had never come up before.
“Uh, yeah,” The pitch of Jesse’s voice rose. Too weird. This was a mistake. “I-if you’re not down for that, of course--”
“Anata. Calm yourself.” Hanzo added a touch of his strict affect usually reserved for active domination. Jesse hadn’t been this thrown asking for something in an exceptionally long time. “When have I ever not listened to you?”
“Last week when I told you the toaster was still hot, and your dumbass thumb paid the price.”
Rather than be miffed by the sassy contrarianism, Hanzo laughed. That seemed to help, as Jesse’s tense shoulders pulled away from his ears a little. Hanzo reached up to comb at Jesse’s beard to soothe him further.
“I can see why you waited to ask. This is a good place to experiment.” Hanzo offered his partner a sweet smile. “And perhaps still break a bed or two in the process.”
The skin Hanzo’s fingers brushed as he continued to card Jesse’s beard grew a little warm in a flush. A shy smirk lightened Jesse’s face at last, and he nodded.
“I feel kinda stupid for feelin’ kinda stupid,” Jesse confessed and pulled Hanzo in for a full hug; Hanzo kissed his jaw and shook his head.
“Don’t worry about it. I would be delighted to indulge in a new way to leave you utterly undone.”
“Aw shucks, sweet pea,” Jesse giggled and nudged his nose against Hanzo’s to meet him in a lingering kiss. Some anxiety would likely pop up again as they tried to follow through, but Jesse had made his request and he could content himself knowing that, when needed, Hanzo would be right there to bring him back down again. That was the greatest gift of his partner’s place in his life: understanding and anticipating Jesse’s few personal reservations he never shared with anybody else. In learning to forgive himself, Hanzo had also learned not to judge others like he had in his spoiled youth. He’d seen the rock-bottom of toxic self-blame, and overcoming it had grown within him a healthy bloom of empathy.
Jesse loved it, and loved him all the more for it.
Their kiss deepened, and Jesse’s hand not-so-sneakily began to wedge into the back of Hanzo’s pants. Unexpected texture met his fingertips, giving him pause. Embroidery.
“You little shit, ” Jesse rumbled.
“Surprise,” Hanzo replied with a wicked smile and reached down to squeeze Jesse’s jeans between his legs. Jesse’s grin only widened as one hand retreated, took one of Hanzo’s, and guided it to untuck his shirt. The flash of pink just over the top of his jeans tipped Hanzo off, and his eager fingers brushed similar, semi-rough embroidery.
“Oh.”
“I love you, you sneaky bastard.”
“We certainly are a pair, aren’t we?"
“Soulmates, even.”
“I’m not sure if another pair of people in the history of man have ever or will ever after come to that realization by learning each independently tried to surprise the other by sneak-wearing lingerie before vacation, but...I don’t know how else to describe it,” Hanzo finished with a self-effacing shrug.
Jesse burst into laughter hearty enough it aborted his attempt to kiss Hanzo again. His giggle fit, however, was involuntarily finished for him by Hanzo, who got to work unbuckling his belt and opening up his jeans.
“Do you have everything on?” Hanzo asked.
“Everything but the top. The skirt thing ain’t work too well under a button-up. You?”
“Stockings and all.”
Hanzo pulled Jesse in by his belt loops and ground them together, sealing it with a kiss that finished with a slow, firm bite. Jesse shivered a little against him and moaned.
“Finish dressing,” Hanzo commanded.
Jesse heel-turned for the dresser, unbuttoning his shirt as he went. Inside the top drawer, he dug up the final piece of his lacy ensemble he’d sequestered in his shirts. Since its maiden voyage months previous, Jesse had gotten quite a bit of use out of it.
Hanzo shed his outer shell of clothes and took his rightful place on the king-size bed. The warm island breeze from the open windows felt energizing after such a long day of travel. However the bright-white sand beach and lapping waves could not possibly hold his eyes’ interest when Jesse was right there in front of him and moments from pleading with want.
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Hanzo watching, stretched out on the bed and chin propped up on a hand. God, he was stunning in all that deep green. Hanzo caught on to the staring and drew his knees up to bend and spread them wide. His hand slid over the obvious bulge of his dick underneath the lace and toyed with it, thrusting his hips in place as well as making the outline of his dick shift under his hand.
Two could play at that goddamn game. Jesse decided to make a show of his own out of it and turned away to slide off his jeans in one low bow, ass on display and wiggling. He dug his thumbs into the lacy cuffs around his thighs and snapped them against his skin, partially to wind Hanzo up, but also stretch them out a bit after wearing them all day. That left the top, which he slid on and snapped closed behind him with practiced ease. A single twirl made the tulle drape flutter, and Jesse tacked on a cheeky wink as a last flourish. Hanzo’s appreciative smile grew downright predatory. He beckoned Jesse with a finger.
Jesse obeyed in a clambering mess of limbs to get on the bed and slide over Hanzo where he lay. They fell into a series of progressively heated kisses, hose-covered legs sliding against each other just so to add delicious texture to their little bit of bump-and-grind. When Hanzo instinctively reached around to squeeze Jesse’s ass, however, Jesse inconveniently remembered himself and the plan. He slowed and backed off. The source of the anxiety wasn’t hard to guess; Hanzo guided them both to sit up and gave Jesse’s shoulder a soft kiss.
“You’re beautiful, anata.” Jesse smiled down at his lap, making Hanzo’s heart utterly melt. “But you do not need to try anything new right now, if you prefer.”
“It’s stupid as hell to hesitate in a getup like this,” Jesse gave up a self-deprecating laugh. Hanzo took his hand.
“Tell me what makes you hesitate.”
“Ain’t any one specific thing. Just...kinda feel like a jackass for asking. And I mean...thinking about it in any capacity outside of pulling myself off makes me feel like it, too.”
“Ah. Is this how you made your discovery? Thinking too much while I am away?” Hanzo asked low and lascivious to entice him, but kept hold of Jesse’s hand in silent reassurance that Jesse could retreat at any time.
“Yeah,” A smile bloomed once again on Jesse’s face despite himself. “You know me. Can’t let me alone for ten minutes, much less a week. I get up to trouble."
“But I love your trouble,” Hanzo whispered up against Jesse’s ear. He nudged in to draw the very tip of his tongue in a silky line under his partner’s ear, ending in a tug of the lobe with his teeth. A responding arch of Jesse’s neck encouraged him to continue. “Tell me what made you come.”
Shit, Hanzo was just too goddamn good at this. Directing him. Easing him out of his anxieties. Hanzo made for an excellent dom, but he had never once controlled Jesse to his selfish ends – every effort was about guiding Jesse to the exact place he wanted to be, and Hanzo pulled his gratification from that.
“You marked me up ‘til I was tender and fucked me ‘til I cried,” Jesse whispered back. A wash of relief joined his pooling lust as Hanzo yanked him urgently over for a breath-stealing kiss. Everything felt a little more permissible. Of course it was and always had been, but Jesse needed more than just the personal understanding. And...there was more. He kept close even when the kiss ended, hiding against Hanzo’s jaw, where he traced a hesitant line with the tip of his nose.
“That’s what I want, but.”
Hanzo let Jesse’s hesitant silence sit for a moment before beginning a long, patient cycle of stroking down Jesse’s back, and he didn’t look him in the eyes. Comfort and space were needed, he could tell.
“Go on.”
“I-I ain’t...” Shit, he didn’t know how to explain this in a way that wasn’t ridiculous. “I ain’t bad. I don’t...”
Jesse grew more frustrated, and Hanzo couldn’t help cupping Jesse’s jaw to make their gazes meet. He was a little lost, to be honest. Bad? Nothing about the love of his life was-- His puzzled expression smoothed out with belated understanding. Oh. Once all context was appreciated, everything made sense. Being bad, or even more cloying, naughty. That was the common scenario, after all. To the point of parody. But Jesse...had enough uncomfortable emotions attached to a past of being actually, materially quote-unquote bad. Hanzo had no trouble imagining how his partner would find that kind of play a complete non-starter. So, then, time to flip the script.
“I would never, darling. Never once have you ever been anything other than perfect,” Hanzo replied so softly as to be almost inaudible, lips dusting Jesse’s skin for how close they were. A little overwhelmed gasp eked from Jesse in perfect comprehension.
“I love you,” Jesse said.
“And I, you. Come lay on my lap and let me adore you. And if you ever need...”
“Yeah, I know, baby.”
“Please, Jesse. Do not hesitate to use our safe word. This is new,” Hanzo stressed as he pet his thumb over Jesse’s cheek.
“I will.”
Jesse moved first, urging Hanzo back towards the headboard to sit. Once settled, Jesse didn’t lie down right away, and instead stood on his knees straddling his partner and swayed a bit in place. It was a simple little enticement more to embolden himself than entertain Hanzo, though he did loose Hanzo’s topknot and let his hair fall over the shaved side for him to pet. The attempted confidence boost wasn’t lost on Hanzo; he acknowledged it silently by smoothing his hands up the backs of Jesse’s thighs and stared at his undulating hips, all clad in the fine pink lace he so loved.
“What’s that phrase you use? I’ll gas you up?”
Jesse giggled and nodded. Hanzo could feel new heat radiating off his partner’s skin as he nibbled at his pulse. In return, Jesse spread his palm wide over Hanzo’s lacy, low-rise panties and squeezed to earn a gritty sigh from him.
“I adore your touch. Give me more.”
Jesse ran his hands up Hanzo’s silky, emerald legs from ankles to hips. Beyond that, Jesse began to question every possible next choice he could make. Lie on his back? No, that would be stupid, Hanzo wouldn’t be able to reach his ass. More striptease? But he had just put this whole thing on. Nothing sounded good. Still , hesitance lurked in the back of his head. Why did he need to doubt again? He reclaimed his seat on Hanzo’s lap, but was too self-distracted to put much emotion into his hands wandering Hanzo’s chest of their own accord. Hanzo naturally noticed; he took Jesse’s hands and kissed the curled fingers.
“I am being foolish.”
Jesse balked a little, face pinched in confusion. Was he doing that poorly?
“How do you mean?”
“It’s my mistake asking you to think. Work. You need care.”
All of Jesse’s reservations abruptly lifted. Hanzo was right; in trying to give Jesse agency to act at his own pace, he’d become overwhelmed instead.
“It’s okay. I thought...”
Hanzo shook his head and when he spoke again, his voice was warm but hard, like a rod wrapped in velvet. It always impressed Jesse how effortlessly Hanzo could just...turn it on like that.
“No, my job is to anticipate your needs before you feel them. Come here,” he said. Gentle and inviting, yes, but didn’t even suggest the possibility of debate. The hottest drop of growing lust yet slid down Jesse’s throat to his gut, thick and slow as molasses.
Jesse slid away, flushing violently for the command he’d been given, to spread himself across Hanzo’s lap in prime position. Rather than jump right in, Hanzo pet his hand down Jesse’s whole torso, neck to thighs, soothing the tension he could feel just under the skin.
“Better. Just lay and be beautiful. You will be attended to.”
Underneath, against Hanzo’s legs, Jesse’s hips squirmed in anticipation – a good sign. Encouraged fingers kept up their petting in slow, firm drags across tulle and lace. He lingered his touch particularly along the cleft of Jesse’s ass, just hard enough to dig in a little and get Jesse wiggling again. Soothe, then unsettle just a little. That went on for a while until Hanzo felt the last bit of tense resistance give in the small of Jesse’s back.
Another pass of his hand swept down, and when it came up again presumably to cycle through once more, Hanzo instead kept it aloft for half a second before bringing his whole palm down in one snap of a forceful swat, right onto the meatiest curve of his partner’s ass. Jesse jolted heavily in his lap and let out a high, surprised little bark as he fisted the sheets aside his head. Hanzo brought all the sudden tension right back down again with soothing pets where he’d struck.
“Just what you need, right darling?”
“Yes. More, please,” Jesse gasped, rough and desperate with his face half-buried in the mattress.
Another hearty thwap fell. Hanzo found he rather enjoyed the way it made Jesse’s ample, full cheeks tremble in response. It helped, too, that he could feel Jesse’s dick growing hard between them. He drew his teeth over his lower lip as his mouth watered. Off to his left, he could see Jesse’s fingers no longer fisting the sheets, but teasing it with searching fingertips.
The soft rake of 1000-count fabric combined with Jesse’s growing sensitivity in a perfect cacophony of sensational static. He sighed in delight and indulged in more gentle shuffling in place, teasing his already-eager dick where it was trapped. Christ, Hanzo had been right; just let him take over and let Jesse sink into what he’d asked for. The hand struck again and Jesse arched ass-up and shivering.
“My...m-my hair,” Jesse sputtered.
As willed, Hanzo began teasing Jesse’s hair with stubby, calloused fingertips, and Jesse immediately melted with a soft groan. When the next strike fell, Jesse didn’t jump as hard for the soothing pets providing distraction. It was so effective, Jesse almost didn’t notice the slide of Hanzo pushing the last layer of fabric down his ass to bare skin until the last millisecond, when Hanzo’s hand flew up and landed again with a much sharper-sounding smack. In exact time, Hanzo’s free hand fisted Jesse’s hair in a soft tug; Jesse gave up a long bleat that drifted into a sob. Tingling filled in where the hand left off in the most tender parts of him. Just as it began to fall off, it reasserted itself in another smack , and his previously-fretting hands began to claw and grip the sheets more desperately.
“Yes, enjoy yourself,” Hanzo rumbled and smiled as Jesse rutted harder into his lap. Another strike fell, this time earning a delicious full-throated wail from his partner. “Nothing makes me happier than knowing you’re so well-tended, you cry.”
Jesse tightened up in Hanzo’s hands – not out of any reservation, but straining joy. He just wanted to be doted on, sometimes. Hanzo not only understood and provided, but spoiled. Jesse may have submitted, but Hanzo gave, and gave selflessly. Until they’d met, Jesse had never asked for a goddamn thing in his life, so to be given to in this volume, and with such preternatural understanding...sometimes it threatened to destroy him in the sweetest possible way.
“Shall I ruin you, anata?”
Jesse couldn’t wrangle language at the moment, so he nodded frantically where he lay.
One rapid-fire heartbeat separated Jesse’s wordless reply from the next strike. Then two more, smack-thwap, right one top of each other. Jesse was panting into the mattress and pressed his hot cock hard as he could against whatever convenient bit of Hanzo he could. A cool hand soothed across his friction-hot skin, making him shiver and drift further away in mental-static bliss.
As Hanzo stroked, he took his time admiring his work. The whole of Jesse’s ass was bright pink, now, and just beginning to truly redden at the peak. Sweat had gathered at the small of Jesse’s back; Hanzo drew two fingers firmly down the length of Jesse’s spine to sweep it up at the end. Jesse was so large, laid out across him like this. Pink and freckled and thick. The tulle drape had been pushed up while Jesse had wriggled and Hanzo worked, so Hanzo took the time now to put it back in place, tugging it here and there to his exacting tastes. Elegant. When all that was done, at last, his hand came up again.
The next smack landed so unexpectedly, Jesse emptied his lungs in a shriek of a sob. The sting ran up his spine and spread across his chest like fire. A second hit chased it before he could draw another full breath, and all at once he fell completely apart. Tears dampened the sheets beneath him, but everything – sting, throb, heat, and crying alike – was cathartic to the greatest degree.
Hanzo stopped the moment Jesse began to truly cry and switched to carding his hair again. When he shifted how he sat, Jesse’s cock, heavy with want, rubbed against him again, lace on lace. Though he was certainly beginning to need , Hanzo had too much to mind right now to let himself get carried away. Minutes ticked by, and Jesse’s sobs grew more elongated and softer. Eventually, a belated and enthusiastic grind of Jesse’s hips gave renewed permission to continue, but rather than strike again, Hanzo chose to pinch his ass instead, right at the darkest-colored point with slowly-increasing pressure. A long, tear-ragged moan climbed in octave along with it, until a twitch gave Hanzo the cue to back off and immediately pet the intensity away.
“Lovely,” Hanzo murmured, drawing gentle, aimless lines across Jesse’s skin.
Jesse was barely listening. His senses were far too preoccupied by the tactile.
“H-harder,” he rasped. “And when I’m ready, fuck me like you mean it.”
Hanzo had to take a deep, steadying breath. Jesus Christ. Just under Jesse’s damp, stringy fringe, Hanzo could see the corner-fold of a smile marring the leftover teartracks on Jesse’s jaw. The little shit. All he wanted to do in that moment was roll Jesse over and mount him hard and fast as possible.
Instead, Hanzo landed his firmest slap yet on Jesse’s ass. A thick clap from the effort of his elbow put behind it. The ensuing twin rush brought by Jesse’s howl and the bodily jolt pressing just so against his eager dick made Hanzo’s eyes roll back. He pinched again, tighter and more merciless.
“You love making me wait. But not too long, anata. I must have you.”
A sharp gasp kept Jesse from replying right away. His hips shifted restlessly as the sensation came back down and remembered how words worked again.
“Get me ready.”
Mouthy boy – very well. Hanzo reached for the lube he’d left on the sidetable and patiently slicked up the fingers of his right hand. Upon sliding them in to begin circling Jesse’s hole, Hanzo delighted in the radiating heat from the skin he’d worked so hard to mark up. It was tender, too; his usual firm approach seemed to be too much for Jesse this time, as he flinched a little in reaction. Hanzo eased up on the pressure and teased Jesse’s hair with his free hand to soothe and apologize.
“All this work has softened you up so well. You’re lovely when you’re rough, but it is a particular indulgence to make you so pliant.”
All Jesse responded with was a long, weighted sigh that reverberated in his whole body.
“You should allow yourself this more, anata. Your thick skin and tough face don’t have to be used here, between us,” Hanzo continued quietly. “You taught me to rest. Reserve some for yourself.”
Jesse let out another gentle sob. He loved this man so much. He parted his thighs more where he lay to accommodate Hanzo as he continued fingering him. That stretched the panties where they had been pulled down to his thighs; the tension made him shiver anew. As soon as the first fingertip made entrance, the physical need swept over Jesse in one great cresting wave. He had never so desperately craved dick the way he did now in his whole-ass slutty life. All the emotion and slow-burning arousal boiled over – his hips rocked in place, urging Hanzo’s touch in that tiniest bit more. Little whimpers, almost inaudible given his faceplant into the sheets, began escaping him and left the fabric hot and quickly growing damp from breath and a touch of needy drool alike.
“Fuck me,” Jesse begged.
“Soon.”
Seeing his partner so wound up made it hard to concentrate, and Hanzo noticed how thorough the damp spot had become that marked where Jesse’s dick was. His need was becoming unmanageable, too. Since Jesse had obviously acclimated, Hanzo put more pressure behind his fingers; the extra sting made Jesse keen. By the time Hanzo graduated to three fingers, they were trembling against each other with desperation. For good measure, he reeled a hand back and slapped Jesse’s pink ass one last time.
“You said until I cried, yes?” Hanzo rumbled.
He freed himself from underneath Jesse’s legs and pulled his own dark green panties down enough to tuck the waistband behind his balls. No time for a full disrobing, and anyway, it would look so much better. He spread over Jesse’s back with all the haste his shaky limbs could muster. Hung over Jesse’s back and propped on one forearm, Hanzo took his heavy, damp cock in hand and sank slow and firm into his partner. The whole of Jesse beneath him, spine to fingertips, lengthened in a sated, cat-like stretch. Hanzo lay down, leaning to one side so he could knot the free hand tight in Jesse’s hair and pull . Already, a fresh tear track shone on Jesse’s cheek; Hanzo swept it up with a kiss from behind and began canting his hips.
One uneven yank on Jesse’s ragged hair and he was gone, eyes rolled up in his skull and jaw agape, tongue lolling and all. Hanzo’s dick was, of course, a delicacy he was a glutton for, but the radiating heat and soreness from the spanking added everything he’d hope it would. A spike of pain, just enough to incite but not uncomfortably overwhelm. And a duller, constant halo of feeling that never let him go. Consumptive in its experience, and all given by the one human being on Earth he trusted implicitly.
Jesse had needed to learn to live with being ridden hard and left out wet by life at a young age. He was an expert at coping with it. That also meant he approached any attachment with a fair degree of hesitation. Expectation of loss was the rule, not the exception. Life would not relent in its rough handling of him. With Hanzo, however, he could embrace the harm in his life more completely. See it, acknowledge it, and find all the things he’d wanted but denied himself because of his fear of it. That’s what his request and the sex that it led to meant to him now: no harm ever came from his partner. Jesse could extend his hand into the nebulous pieces of himself, and whatever he pulled out from it was something Hanzo would help him understand and protect him from, if necessary. That included pain itself.
In that moment, Jesse had never been so in love, felt as loved, or felt as thoroughly and satisfyingly fucked.
Hanzo was so focused on his rhythm that Jesse’s sudden, belting wail made him start in surprise. Any brief hiccup in thrust didn’t appear to bother Jesse in the least, as he kept up howling, though it was broken by each heavy pass of Hanzo’s dick back and forth inside. Hanzo tugged harder on Jesse’s hair to hold his head up from the mattress and nipped a few kisses on Jesse’s neck where the tendons strained from his gaping jaw and bobbing adam’s apple.
“Perfect. That’s what you are. Mine, and perfect,” Hanzo hissed and put all his core strength into one brutal thrust. Jesse’s jaw snapped back shut as another gritty sob slipped past his bared teeth. Pitched ahhs matched Hanzo’s increasingly-staccato thrusts. Fists balled up the blankets tight enough to make Jesse’s knuckles white. Neither of them were going to last much longer.
“Ma--” Jesse wheezed.
Hanzo yanked at Jesse’s hair again to get their heads as close as possible.
“Tell me, love.”
“Make...make me your husband,” Jesse rasped between broken, dry sobs. “I’m yours. Keep me.”
Good thing they were both on the edge of coming, because if Hanzo had been any less consumed, he’d have been stopped mid-thrust in surprise. Instead, he let go of Jesse’s hair so he could hold him tight around the shoulders and bury himself as deep as he could in desperate strokes. Anything to imbue the potent, pure emotion coursing through him. Lust, shock, confusion, soul-deep adoration, all at once. He mashed his mouth into Jesse’s sweat-slick and freckled shoulders, half-kiss, half-bite. Jesse’s grip huddled up in kind to hug Hanzo’s arms around him. Judging from Hanzo’s strained breaths, Jesse could tell he was close, so he rut into the mattress, hard and fast enough it would probably chafe, but right now, it was the exact kind of rough feedback his battered senses needed. He came, shrieking, into one of Hanzo’s forearms.
Hanzo’s own orgasm hit so hard, he actually did bite into Jesse’s meaty shoulder with a vicious grunt. Both collapsed in exhaustion; Jesse, facefirst into the sheets, and Hanzo, buried into the crook of Jesse’s neck.
“I will,” Hanzo croaked to answer Jesse’s question at last. “I will. I must.”
Jesse’s body stuttered weakly against him from new, exhausted sobbing. Hanzo eased himself out and tossed aside any consideration of cleaning up in favor of caring for his partner. He lay beside Jesse to nuzzle at the side of his head and kiss the edge of his beard. Though there were so many questions circling his head too, they had to wait. This was some of the most intense sex they’d ever had – Hanzo himself was having a tough time keeping a hand on the wheel, emotionally speaking.
“Come here, Jesse, let me hold you.”
He’d never seen Jesse move so fast before; he flipped and burrowed right into Hanzo’s chest in a heartbeat and wrapped him in arms so tight, it was a little difficult to breathe. Real concern drove Hanzo to gently comb his partner’s hair where just minutes ago, he had ruthlessly pulled. Crying was fine, but Hanzo wasn’t sure what the tears were for at this point. Was it grateful release, or something much more serious?
“Are you all right?” Hanzo asked.
Jesse nodded against him rather than speak, and Hanzo finally relaxed enough to finally enjoy his afterglow. They laid that way, tangled in each other, for a long while. The sea breeze was wonderful on their damp skin. It was surreal to imagine that eight hours ago, they’d left Gibraltar under dim, overcast gray skies and foam-capped breakwater on the cliffs. Sun, silence, and solitude were a panacea. To call it paradise here was rather an understatement.
At length, a deep breath announced the end of Jesse’s fit, but still he didn’t speak. Hanzo could feel his hesitant tension. Surely, he didn’t regret speaking his mind?
“Did you think I would refuse you?” Hanzo sfinally allowed himself to feel and express his worry, now that Jesse was mostly whole again.
“No, baby, no,” Jesse rasped. Their session had really put his voice through the ringer – it was lower and more ragged than usual. “I just...it’s not that I haven’t thought about it, but...I didn’t put a lot of importance on it before now. But you...you did all this for me, and I got so...so overwhelmed, I guess I want it more than I realized.”
Hanzo had taken to holding Jesse’s face in his hands and petting the reddened skin with his thumbs in comfort and adoration. That always made Jesse smile, no matter what. He leant in to press a happy, reassuring kiss on Hanzo’s lips in hopes of passing that smile on.
“D’you mean it?” Jesse asked at a whisper. “Would you?”
The smile hadn’t been contagious; in fact, Hanzo appeared deadly serious, eyebrows and mouth in rigid, severe lines.
“Jesse, there is nothing I will not do for you. When I tell you I love you, that is forever. I cannot do anything else. Any official, legal recognition has been a distant second in my mind, too. But if it is important enough to you to become my husband, there is no question. When I say I must , that’s what I mean. Your fulfillment is mine.”
“You’re so fuckin’ dramatic,” Jesse giggled, rough and still thickened with emotion. The tease did get Hanzo to lighten up and smile at last, however.
“Earnest,” Hanzo corrected. “A trait you bestowed upon me.”
They kissed again, longer and sweeter.
“Mmkay. Let’s...let’s get married, then,” Jesse said, lips brushing a dimple aside Hanzo’s mouth.
“Yes.” Hanzo pressed more butterfly kisses to Jesse’s hair line. “Tomorrow? The next day?”
“Wait, here?”
“Certainly. Why not? I doubt we are the first two lovesick morons to decide as much. They probably keep someone on retainer at the main resort.”
Jesse had to conceded to that truth, but as he gibbered, Hanzo’s eyes dipped low and away.
“Here. On the beach. Just us, the way it always has been. We can celebrate plenty with everyone when we return home, if you wish for that. But what I have to tell you in any vow is for you. No one else.”
“Done,” Jesse replied warmly. “Just you and me.”
“I...will be clumsy. But you will hear how I feel properly. I know you see, but it is beyond time for me to actually say.”
Jesse hauled himself up to roll Hanzo onto his back and capture him in a deep, grateful kiss.
“It comes from you. That’s all it needs to be, clumsy and all,” he reassured.
Hanzo framed Jesse’s face again with adoring hands.
“I love you.”
“Love you, too, sweet pea. Tomorrow, then.”
“Tomorrow.”
And then, the rest of their lives.