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Chapter Text

When Jayesh broke a string on his guitar with a loud twang, Kari looked up from the picture book she was reading to her toddlers. Jayesh stared at the string, then bent his head over the instrument with a sigh.

It had been a quiet evening in their apartment. Jayesh was home after a long mission in Old China, and Kari had done everything she could to keep things quiet and peaceful. Their children, Connor and Stephanie, 5 and 2, had been overjoyed to have their daddy home at last. They had spent the day following him around like a pair of shadows, showing him toys and drawings, and generally courting every drop of attention he would give them.

Kari was impatiently waiting for bedtime, when she would finally have him to herself. Something was wrong, she could tell. Jayesh thought he was so good at hiding things, but she knew him too well - the way his smile didn't quite reach capacity, the way the blue Light that sparkled in his eyes was barely visible, the way he busied himself with the children to avoid talking to her. She went through the motions of meals and making sure his gear was sent off for cleaning, but something was off. He didn't communicate, and Jayesh always talked to her. After a mission, he was usually so lonely for her, he didn't stop talking for hours.

"What's wrong?" she asked over the book.

Jayesh lifted his head with a quick smile, his teeth bright in his dark-skinned face. "Just wound the string too tight, is all." He began removing the broken string, his movements controlled and too careful.

Kari went on with the story, but her sense that something was wrong with her husband grew stronger.

When she reached the end, she closed it and said, "Bedtime for munchkins!"

Connor and Stephanie protested.

"Daddy will be here the rest of the week," Kari promised them. "You'll get to see him as much as you want. But he's very tired and it's bedtime for everyone."

She caught Jayesh's grateful look as she shepherded the two to bed. Connor went to bed with his ghost, Varan, and Stephanie snuggled up with a plush ghost, since they didn't know if she was a Guardian yet.

Then Kari went into the kitchen to put away the last of the dishes. It was an excuse to compose herself, really. Whatever her husband was hiding would probably wreck her life for a while, the way he'd so often done before.

"Traveler," she thought, leaning against the kitchen counter, "grant me extra Light. I can't do this alone."

The Traveler was a mechanical sphere the size of a small moon that floated above the Last Safe City. It emitted a power called Light that the Guardians drew upon for power to fight the enemies of humanity. It had also created the Ghosts, little robots with healing powers and the ability to resurrect their bonded Guardian.

Jayesh had been teaching Kari to reach out to the Traveler for extra Light. The machine - or entity - or whatever it was - responded to her request every time.

This time, her ghost, Neko, appeared at her shoulder. He wore a royal blue shell with a rampant lion across it - a Titan shell for a warlock's ghost. He swept her with a healing beam. It seemed to reach inside her, strengthening and settling her, giving her the resolve she needed to face the unknown.

"Thanks," she thought to Neko.

"Consider it a gift from the Traveler," he replied in her mind. She had had her ghost for more than a century, and their neural symbiosis was deep and strong. They shared thoughts and feelings, particularly strong feelings. And right now, she sensed his jealousy of Jayesh and concern about what he might be concealing.

"Don't," she thought, poking the jealousy. "You know I hate that."

Neko struggled to hide it from her. "I'm sorry, I know. It's just ... he's going to make you upset."

"Do you know what's up with him?"

"No. His ghost hasn't spoken to me since they got home."

Another bad sign. Jayesh's ghost, Phoenix, always told his brother Neko all the news. If they were both keeping quiet, something was definitely up. Kari tried to imagine what it might be, to prepare herself. Jayesh had been stationed in the outer planets? He'd been shot with a weapon of sorrow and had days to live? He'd accidentally murdered their fireteam?

Kari brushed her dyed purple hair into place and drew a deep breath. Then she went into the living room.

Jayesh was in the middle of adding a new string to his guitar and didn't look at her. Kari sat down on the sofa across from his chair. "So ... what's going on?"

"I'll tell you once we're in our room," he said, attention fixed on the string.

Kari waited, a sense of doom weighing on her. "Is someone dead?"

The corner of his mouth lifted in a smile. "No, nothing like that."

"Did you lose your Light again?"

"No."

"You're keeping quiet about something. I'm just going to assume the worst."

Jayesh finally met her gaze over the neck of his guitar. "Nobody is in danger and I'm fine, lovelight. I just ... have a decision to make."

Kari drew a breath and closed her eyes. "You're seeing another woman?"

"No!" This came with an incredulous laugh. "How could you even think that?"

She opened her eyes and found his attention entirely fixed on her now, earnest and anxious.

"You're acting so weird," Kari said. "And you won't tell me what's wrong."

Jayesh laid the guitar in its case, the string still flopping loose. Then he got up, crossed the living room in two strides, and took her hands. He pulled her to her feet and kissed her, both arms around her waist.

Kari sighed and leaned against him, wrapping her arms around his neck. His kiss was tender, yet upset, conveying so much in just that simple touch. He whispered against her cheek, "I would never do that to you, lovelight. I promised." He tugged her toward their room. "Come on."

Kari allowed him to lead her into the bedroom, turning off the lights as they went. Once they were safely inside with the door shut, Jayesh kissed her again and seemed to drop his reserve. "Ugh, it's been a day. I've been dreading this."

"You've been dreading this?" Kari exclaimed, watching him begin to unbuckle his heavy combat robe. "You've been a wall of ice since you walked in the door. Did the Vex take the Traveler? Just tell me!"

Jayesh faced her and drew a deep breath. "Uh. Okay. First, the Vanguard wants to send our team to Ganymede."

"Ganymede?" Kari said, pressing a hand to her mouth. "What in the world?"

"There's been a lot of Fallen activity there, lately," Jayesh replied. "Especially down in the jungle valleys, where the Golden Age bone yards are. They want us to investigate."

Kari processed this. Not exactly wonderful news, but not terrible news, either. Not enough for him to close himself off the way he had. She scrutinized him as he pulled off his robe and hung it from a hook in the corner.

"That's not all, is it?" she said.

Jayesh stood with his back to her in his thermal undersuit. She saw him sigh. Then he reached into his robe's pocket, pulled out a folded sheet of paper, and held it out. Kari took it and unfolded it.

A hand-written letter. Neat and clear. Her question about another woman flickered uneasily in the back of her mind. Then her gaze settled on the signature at the bottom.

S.

Kari threw the paper on the floor as if it had turned into a poisonous snake. "Light burn him!"

Jayesh turned. "Did you read it?"

"No. Shin Malphur tried to kill you. What's he doing writing you letters?"

"Read it," Jayesh said wearily. He sat on the bed to pull off his boots.

Kari picked up the letter with a thumb and forefinger and shook it out straight.

Shin Malphur was an assassin who hunted Guardians who abandoned the Light and had fallen to the Darkness. But he did this by baiting Guardians with weapons of sorrow: twisted, hungry guns and swords made of sapient bone that whispered to the user and fed upon death. Jayesh had taken this particular test and passed - barely.

The letter said that Shin respected Jayesh after their last encounter, and yet had a favor to ask. The original weapon of sorrow, Thorn, the cursed hand cannon of serial killer Dredgen Yor, was locked up somewhere and had been for years. Shin was offering it to Jayesh - either for Jayesh to purify, or to destroy. But Shin wanted to move on, and he wanted to be rid of the weapon.

"Why does he offer this to you?" Kari said, throwing the letter on the dresser. "I swear, he's trying to corrupt you so he can kill you for good. I saw how you looked when you came back from fighting him. You were almost dead and so was Phoenix."

Jayesh sat on the bed in his undershirt, stroking his ghost at his shoulder with two fingers. Phoenix wore a bright red and yellow shell, and leaned into the caress like a puppy, closing his blue eye.

"That's what I was afraid to talk about," Jayesh replied. "I didn't know how to even bring it up. 'Kari, remember that crazy guy who tried to kill me and my friends? Yeah, he's not really evil, and he needs my help.'"

"He mercy-killed you," Kari murmured.

Jayesh met her gaze steadily. "It turned out all right. I found my Sunsinger power."

"He shot you like you were a horse," Kari exclaimed, rising to her feet, fists clenched. "And he has the nerve to offer you the most evil, Light-eating weapon of all time? He'll show up and kill you again. Only this time it'll take. I can't do it, Jay. Don't make me go through this again."

They gazed at each other a long moment. Kari wanted to punch him, she wanted to cry on his shoulder, she wanted to kiss him frantically. So she did nothing but stand there, controlling herself the way she controlled the Arc Light that crackled through her veins.

Jayesh held out one arm. "Come here."

She sat beside him and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, holding her close. His familiar smell enfolded her, warm and earthy. He was a little too warm, his Solar Light flickering near the surface with his own tension.

"It's been two years," he murmured against her hair. "I haven't threatened to die on you in that long. Don't you trust me, lovelight?"

She buried her face in his neck. "I trust you. But I feel like my heart is all scarred from seeing you hurt. I can't go through it again. He'll murder you. He's a killer, just like Dredgen Yor was."

"Not this time, I don't think," Jayesh replied, stroking her hair. He kissed her temple. "Rumor has it that he's retiring. Passing the torch to the next generation of Guardians. If I were Shin, I'd be looking for a Guardian to dump Thorn on, just to get rid of that particular baggage. I don't think he'd care what I'd do with it."

"What would you do with it?" Kari asked, sitting up and studying his face.

Jayesh's features were all clear, clean lines, speaking of his Indian ancestors. He always brushed his dark hair up into spikes, but tonight it had settled into waves across his forehead. The blue Light had returned to his eyes, not a glow, like the Awoken race had, but a reflected sparkle that had no natural source. He had a strong jaw, but his mouth was sensitive and often gave away his feelings. And right now, he was worried and tired.

"I don't know," he said at last. "Burn it with Light, probably. Scrape the bone off and see if the gun beneath can be salvaged. Bit of a modding project."

"If it didn't feed on you," Kari said.

Jayesh nodded. "There is that." He met her eyes. "Would you come with me when I go find it? I don't want to be alone. And ... I don't want Nell and Grant around any weapons of sorrow. Nell's so susceptible to them."

Kari's heart leaped. He wasn't pushing her away - he was including her, asking for her help, as he had before they were married.

"Of course," she said. "I'll ask Naomi to watch the kids for a day." She kissed him on those expressive lips, seeing the Light in his eyes brighten. "I may be busy at home, Jay, but I'm still a Stormcaller. I've been working out at the Tower gym. I've got your back."

His arm tightened around her and he kissed her hard, his joy and relief conveyed through the contact. "I'm glad," he whispered. "You don't know how glad." He kissed down her cheek and along her neck.

Kari closed her eyes, running her hand through his thick hair. "If Shin is waiting with a sniper rifle somewhere, he's going to have trouble. I owe him a couple of bullets for what he did to you."

"Mm," Jayesh said against her neck. "You're hot when you talk about revenge."

"Avenging you, more like."

"That's what's hot."

She smiled and reached for him.

Chapter Text

"Is Daddy sad?" Stephanie asked the next morning.

Kari was helping her dress. While Stephanie was a precocious two-year-old, with long black hair and huge, expressive eyes, her motor skills weren't quite up to the challenge of navigating a shirt.

"Why do you think Daddy's sad?" Kari asked, turning the shirt right way up. "This is the head hole, honey."

Stephanie successfully pulled the shirt over her head. "Daddy's eyes look sad. And he plays sad songs."

"They were supposed to sound sad," said Connor. He had already dressed and was bouncing on his bed instead of making it. "Dad said it's called a minor key." He hurled himself into space and tried for a three-point landing. Instead, he hit his face on the floor and bloodied his nose. His ghost immediately flew to him and healed him. Connor didn't bother crying about it. He hadn't cried since he was two months old.

"I'm going on a little trip with your Dad today," Kari told them both. "You get to stay with Naomi and play with Reuben."

"Yes!" Connor punched a fist in the air. "He has those cool Fallen toys. We can play Twilight Gap."

Stephanie danced around the room, arms over her head. "I'm the Traveler! Look at me go!"

"The Traveler is a big white ball," Connor replied. "You just look like a balloon."

Stephanie didn't miss a beat. "I'm a balloon! Look at me go!"

Kari watched them both, smiling. These small people had brightened her life in ways they would never know. As she picked up their shoes, she had a sudden, powerful wish that Rem could have met them - could have met Jayesh - could have seen how she'd rebuilt her life. A lump formed in her throat. She swept up Stephanie into a hug, and spared an arm for Connor.

They hugged her back, giggling. Kari kissed them both, forcing away those treacherous tears and all thoughts of her first husband. "Time to put your shoes on."

She was in the middle of tying laces when Neko said in her head, very softly, "You still miss him?"

"Yes," Kari thought.

"Even now that you have Jayesh?"

Kari didn't answer. She couldn't find the words, not when wrestling small shoes onto even smaller feet.

But when she returned to the living room, where Jayesh still sat at the kitchen table in a bathrobe, drinking tea and reading a book, she detoured to run her hands through his hair and kiss the line of his jaw.

He tilted his head to one side and closed his eyes, enjoying this. "Mmm, good morning to you, too."

Kari wanted to say something about how she wanted to love on Jayesh because losing Rem had made Jayesh even more precious to her. But she couldn't string the words together in a way that wouldn't sound like she was comparing them. So she simply smiled and began tidying the living room.

Jayesh set his book down and watched her. "Will the kids be all right?"

"They'll be fine," Kari replied. "Naomi and I trade babysitting duty. She and Charles go out on dates while I watch Reuben. I'll owe her for however long we're gone."

"Right," Jayesh said with a grin. "Guess I better get dressed." He got up and shuffled to the bedroom, still drinking his tea.

Connor and Stephanie ran in, and Kari took them out of the apartment, down a flight of stairs, and along a dormitory hallway to Charles and Naomi's.

Charles was a Guardian, but his wife was not. Due to her fears about him leaving her, he worked only in the Tower, staying close to home. They welcomed Kari, Connor and Stephanie. Their son Reuben, who was slightly younger than Connor, jumped up and down with excitement. The three children raced to his room to find his toys.

"How're you doing?" Naomi asked, giving Kari a hug. She was a short, curvy woman with long brown hair and a knack for making her own dresses. Kari admired her current one.

"Off to help Jayesh on a mission," Kari replied. "If that tells you anything."

Charles, nearby, arched an eyebrow. He was teaching Jayesh to play the guitar, and had sandy hair and an open, friendly face. "Jayesh giving you trouble again?"

Kari could have laughed and said yes, of course, that's what Jayesh was best at. But she had a pact with herself to never run him down to anyone. So she only said, "I haven't been on a mission in ages, so I jumped at the chance to get out of the Tower."

"Well, run along, then," Naomi said with a laugh. She knew about Kari's pact. "The kiddos will be fine."

Kari made her way back to their apartment, relishing the thought of spending time alone with her husband. They hadn't been off-world together in months and months. She'd get a chance to practice her powers - one did not use Stormcalling indoors.

The apartment felt empty and quiet without the kids. Kari made her way to their room. Jayesh was in the shower, so she took her time about changing into her sealed thermal undersuit. She put it on, made sure all the seals were tight, then pulled on her armored robe, the standard Vanguard uniform for warlocks. While sometimes she envied Titans their heavy armor, warlocks had to dress a little lighter, owing to their ability to use the Light to float through the air. One didn't float so well when packing an extra sixty pounds of metal.

She brushed out her hair and pinned it back, examining the purple dye. It had set all right, more of a dark plum than straight purple, as her hair had been red-brown to start with. Her complexion was fair, almost too fair - she sunburned easily, which was especially problematic on Mercury missions. Sometimes she had come home with the shape of her face shield scorched into her skin.

Even though she'd be wearing her helmet most of the day, she applied a little eyeliner and blush. Although she saw herself in the mirror every day and didn't think she was remotely attractive, Jayesh thought differently. He appreciated the effort she put in to make herself look nice, and an appreciative husband was a happy husband.

She was in the middle of this when Jayesh emerged from the shower, clad in a towel and drying his hair. "Hey," he greeted her, and went to the sink to shave.

"Doesn't feel like a very urgent mission," Kari said.

"No rush about this, really," Jayesh replied. "We're just picking up an evil,  soul-devouring weapon that killed hundreds of Guardians. Watch me drag my feet a little harder."

"When's the Ganymede mission?"

"Thursday. Three days from now."

No rush about that, either. Kari patted his bare shoulder. "It'll be fine, you'll see. We'll lift Thorn with tools and never actually touch it."

He flashed her a relieved smile over his shaver. "I'm so glad you're coming."

"You don't worry about me being corrupted?"

Jayesh shaved in silence for a moment, frowning at his reflection. "Well ... you're not going to touch Thorn, and neither am I. And I think if we're together, we can stave off the whispers." He put down the shaver and wiped his face. "Light, Kari, now I'm having second thoughts."

"Don't," she said, stroking his smooth face. "I know all about corruption and whispers. Compared to that Hive infection, this will be cake."

A few years earlier, Kari had contracted an infection from the death-cult aliens known as the Hive. Her body had begun to wither and transform into something similar to a Hive Thrall's. The aliens had whispered corruption and insanity to her mind. Her ghost had sacrificed himself in a suicidal bargain with the Traveler to save her.

Jayesh ran his hand down her right arm and clasped her hand, entwining his fingers through hers. He gazed at her hand a long moment, thinking about this. Then he pressed his lips to her hand, then her wrist. "I almost lost you before I ever met you."

"I pulled through," Kari said, stroking his damp hair with her free hand. She stepped up to him and kissed him slowly. "Don't worry about me. You're the one with the scars." She ran a hand down his bare chest, tracing the faint outlines of long, thin scars, like old knife wounds. But they had been made by the teeth of a foul monster from a higher dimension.

Jayesh held her close for a moment. "I'm healed now, lovelight. I should be able to handle this. But ... I'm so worried that I won't."

"Don't worry," Kari told him, pulling away and picking up her boots. "You're a Sunsinger now. You've been through literal fire and came out stronger. If Thorn whispers to you, burn it."

Jayesh began dressing, smiling a little. "That's the answer to everything, isn't it? Kill it with fire."

Kari pulled on her boots and secured the seals to her suit. "Or lightning. Lightning kills things very effectively."

"Guns do, too," Jayesh added. "But in this case, killing a gun with fire sounds like the best option."

Kari was suited up and ready to go, but Jayesh paused to meticulously rub gel in his hair and comb it into spikes.

"You'll have your helmet on," Kari pointed out. "Why bother?"

"It's the principle of the thing," Jayesh replied. "And you like my hair like this."

Kari did. She had suggested it in the first place. The idea that he would style his hair for her, even though it would be mashed flat under his helmet, made affection warm her through.

Once he was finished, they picked up their helmets and summoned their ghosts. The little robots were always with them, but they stayed dematerialized when their Guardians obviously wanted to be alone.

"Ready?" Kari asked Neko.

He twirled the two halves of his blue shell. "Always."

Nearby, Jayesh lifted Phoenix out of the air and scoured a bit of grime off his red and yellow shell with the corner of his sleeve. "What is this stuff?"

"Jelly," Phoenix replied. "I was playing with Connor and Stephanie."

"Ew," Jayesh said, leaning close to his ghost and making an exaggerated face.

"Ew," Phoenix mimicked, flying into Jayesh's face until his glass eye bumped Jayesh's nose. They both laughed.

The two Guardians and two ghosts left the apartment together. They climbed the stairs from the dormitory levels to the top of the windy Vanguard Tower.

It wasn't much of a tower anymore, however. During the Red War, Tower North had taken severe damage. The Vanguard had relocated headquarters further down the wall, centered around the auxiliary hanger, which was now the main hanger since the old one had collapsed. Now the offices and little shops that used to fill Tower North had reappeared all along the top of the wall, in what was informally called the Tower Walk.

Jayesh hesitated at the top of the stairs, and Kari nearly bumped into him. "What's wrong?"

"Do you think I should report this mission to the Vanguard?" he asked. "Ikora ought to know if I'm dealing with another weapon of sorrow."

Kari's instinct was to keep it secret. But then, if things went wrong, somebody ought to know what was happening. She sighed. "That'd be best."

They made their way along the Tower Walk in the cold autumn wind, weaving under staircases, down covered passages and out into little courtyards or landscaped living areas. Other Guardians moved out on business, alone or in groups, accompanied by their ghosts. Humans moved about, too, working, running businesses, serving alongside their Lightbearer brethren.

The Vanguard was a military organization that had come about as the City grew beneath the Traveler. When the Traveler had first arrived in the solar system, enriched humanity with Light, and terraformed the other planets, humanity had entered a Golden Age. But then the Darkness had attacked, causing the Collapse of human civilization, and severely damaging the Traveler. As it sank into a coma, it sent out the ghosts to find people, living or dead, who would use the Light to fight for the Traveler and humanity.

But the humans that the ghosts resurrected had their own bent toward Darkness, seeking power at the expense of everyone and everything. These Risen became the Warlords, and their rule was known as the Dark Ages.

The Warlords were toppled by the Iron Lords, a group of Risen who saw that humanity was teetering on the brink of extinction. The Iron Lords began construction of the Last City, gathered in survivors, and restored order. The Risen they trained formed the Vanguard - Risen sworn to protect humanity, not exploit it. They eventually became known as Guardians. Most Guardians joined the Vanguard, which was still undermanned after losing a war on the moon. Their numbers had been further decimated in the Red War, and the Guardian population had not yet recovered.

Kari had been resurrected just over a century ago, and had seen some of these conflicts. Jayesh, on the other hand, had only been around about nine years, and as Guardians went, was considered quite young. But he'd faced enough conflict on his own that he was seasoned in combat. Kari had full confidence in his abilities.

Ikora Rey was the Warlock Vanguard, overseeing their education, training, and cooperation with Titans and Hunters. She was a stately woman of African descent, dressed in regal violet robes that set off her dark skin. Her office had a wide balcony that overlooked the Tower Walk and had a fine view of the Traveler in the distance. She was indoors, out of the cold wind, working at a computer with her tablet beside her, when the two warlocks entered her office.

Ikora swiveled her chair to face them across the cluttered table that served as her workspace. "Hello, Guardians. What brings you here?" Her sharp gaze rested on Kari, especially her battle robe. "Come to report in, Kari? You're still listed as being on maternity leave."

A Guardian's maternity leave lasted ten years. The Vanguard valued children and the family unit highly enough to let a soldier raise their children.

Kari smiled. "Not exactly. Jayesh asked me to accompany him on an ... excursion."

Ikora raised one eyebrow at Jayesh.

His brown cheeks flushed a ruddy color. "Uh, well, it's like this. Remember my little run-in with Shin Malphur two years ago?"

Ikora said nothing, but her brows drew down in a scowl.

Jayesh plunged on, "He's retiring, and he contacted me. He's looking for someone to ..." He hesitated and gulped. "... to take the original Thorn."

Ikora's scowl deepened. "And he contacted you."

Jayesh nodded.

Ikora leaned back in her chair and gazed out the balcony doors at the cityscape and hovering Traveler, misty and blue in the morning light. Kari's hand found Jayesh's and gave it a reassuring squeeze. He held onto her, sweaty with nerves.

Ikora turned back to them, fingertips pressed together. "Once the weapon is in your possession, what do you intend to do with it?"

"Scrape the bone off, first," Jayesh said. "See if the frame underneath can be salvaged. If not, I'll burn it."

Ikora nodded slowly. "You know weapons of sorrow and how they work, Jayesh. But be aware that this weapon fed on the Light of hundreds of Guardians. It is a weapon of sickness and corruption. Your Light is strong, and I think you could handle it. However." Her gaze shifted to Kari. "You have been out of the field for five years, now. The battle hardening fades quickly. Of the two of you, you are the one most at risk, here."

"I can handle it," Kari replied.

Ikora shrugged. "Maybe you can. You certainly have history with the Hive. However, Jayesh." She turned back to him. "You are placing your wife, and by extension, your children, all at risk with this venture. If either of you return bearing the sickness of Thorn, it will spread to those most vulnerable."

Kari's stomach twisted at this thought, and she thought she might choke if she tried to speak.

Jayesh drew a deep breath and squared his shoulders. "Kari will never touch it, Commander. I'll bear the whole burden myself. That includes any corruption. And if that happens, I ... I won't return to Earth."

Kari looked at him sharply. Her lips formed the word, "What?"

Ikora smiled dryly. "That is noble of you, Jayesh. However, I'm not interested in a repeat of last time. I advise you to destroy Thorn and return at once. You still have your Ganymede mission coming up."

"Yes, ma'am," Jayesh said.

Ikora turned to Kari. "Now, Kari. I understand your need to leave the Tower. But if anything happens to you - or him - your children will be orphaned. Have you made arrangements for that?"

Kari nodded and found her voice. "We have a will on file. We have friends who would take them in."

Ikora nodded. "Good. You have my permission to go find Thorn ... and destroy it. And for the Traveler's sake, don't bring it near the Tower."

She dismissed them shortly afterward. Jayesh and Kari retraced their steps along the Tower Walk toward the hanger. Jayesh walked in silence, eyes down, frowning.

When they reached the hanger, Kari broke the silence. "What do you mean, you wouldn't come back to Earth?"

Jayesh gave her a sideways glance, then studied the concrete floor. "If the corruption takes hold, and I ... I change ... I'll need you to kill me."

Kari threw her hands in the air. "That's worst case scenario and probably won't happen! Will you get your head on straight? I swear to the Traveler, you are not leaving me for a gun."

That last jibe caught him off guard and he laughed. He laughed all the way to where Kari's ship was docked, far down the secondary landing bay. Her ship was a cruiser with a galley and sleeping quarters. Jayesh's ship was a single-pilot jumpship and not suited for team missions.

"You got me there," he said, still chuckling, as Kari keyed in her access code on the hanger console. "I'll try not to be such a wet blanket."

"More of a wet mop," Kari replied. "Dragging along the floor. Man up, Guardian."

Their ghosts transmatted them aboard the ship. Transmat was Golden Age tech where matter was converted to data and reassembled at another point. But it required a network set up, and Guardians couldn't do it in the field. Their ghosts could move them in and out of their ships, and transmat weapons and supplies from a ship, but that was the extent of it.

The ship's cockpit was wide and shallow, owing to the ship's box-like shape. Kari took the pilot seat and Jayesh took copilot. As she cleared their takeoff with air traffic control, Jayesh had his ghost input their destination coordinates into the ship's computer. Kari glanced at it as it calculated. Old Switzerland in the European Dead Zone.

"Of course, Malphur's sending us there," she muttered, working the controls to taxi the ship to the nearest hangar exit. "He baits Guardians out there with the Shard and picks them off one by one."

"I haven't been there since the forest fire," Jayesh said, sorting through his stored weapons on his ghost's projected holoscreen. "Haven't wanted to go near the place."

Kari didn't blame him. He'd tried to save a fellow Guardian from Malphur and been executed, himself. Being a Guardian, his ghost could resurrect him, but it had been a little different that time. While some Guardians didn't mind dying over and over, Jayesh hated it. Even Kari didn't mind it as much as he did.

"I wish I could have seen you," she said as they cleared the hanger and flew into the blue sky. "Phoenix's footage didn't do you justice, turning into a fire tornado like that."

Jayesh grinned sheepishly. "And I have no plans to do it again, either."

Chapter Text

Kari gained cruising altitude and allowed the ship's AI to choose a course across the Atlantic. It would be a few hours' flight, so she settled back in her chair. "How about a game?"

They played a few rounds of virtual poker on their helmet heads-up displays, their ghosts joining in. It was like the old days, Kari reflected - back when she and Jayesh were only teammates harboring a secret mutual crush.

"I always kicked Rem's butt at poker," Kari remarked. "He couldn't keep his face straight. You're harder to read."

"Helps that my helmet's on," Jayesh said, reclined in his chair with his hands behind his head. "You're hard to read, too, when we play in person. You get this scary expression."

"Scary how?" Kari laughed.

"Scary like ... when you're channeling lightning. Your eyes get all distant and intense."

"You never told me that."

"What, that you intimidated me as a Guardian and a person? Light, Kari, don't make me remind you of what it took for us to get together. I'm a coward."

Kari rubbed his shoulder. "You're not a coward. I'm just ... not as receptive as I could be."

They played games all the way to the European Dead Zone, enjoying the time alone and just being themselves. But as the Shard of the Traveler appeared in the distance, Jayesh fell silent, tense.

The Shard was a huge crescent of metal and nutronium plating that had been torn out of the Traveler during the Collapse. The size of a toppled skyscraper, it reared above the forest like a curved fang, clouds and lightning billowing from its southern side. They kept well away from it.

The forest around it had been corrupted by the endless terraforming power the Shard had leaked into the ground. The trees had died and new species had grown from their roots, mutated and strange. But Jayesh's companions had burned the whole forest to ash by accident. The forest fire had consumed thousands of acres across Old Switzerland for months, but as there were no humans living there anymore, the Vanguard had let it burn.

In the two years since, the forest had regrown, especially around the Shard. It was even stranger now, the trees growing interlaced, fungus-like leaves, all dappled with glowing blue spots.

Shin Malphur's letter directed them to a cave in the Shard's mutant forest. Kari and Jayesh climbed the hill toward it, guns drawn, watching for attack from the aliens called the Fallen, which were known to haunt the Shard in their hunt for salvage. But the forest was quiet that day. They located the cave without incident. Inside it was a small metal box, tucked into the darkest corner.

Jayesh opened it, half-flinching, ready to slam it shut. But all that was inside was another letter, neatly folded, and a small transponder, a box with a dial and a wire sticking out the top.

"What is this, a joke?" Kari said. "Is he going to send you chasing around the solar system for this?"

Jayesh read the letter, a slight line forming between his eyebrows. Then he gazed into the distance, pondering what it said. He passed it to Kari.

The letter explained that this step was an extra safeguard. The transponder pointed out the location of Thorn's resting place - but only for five minutes every twenty-four hours. They would have to watch it carefully. The letter added a few cryptic lines about the links of a chain, and Malphur's thoughts about killing Dredgen Yor and how it had changed him.

Kari didn't want to read it, didn't want Jayesh involved in this, didn't want to be standing in this weird forest where Malphur probably lurked at this moment, waiting for them to show signs of falling to the Darkness. She had a sudden, panicky thought that he would judge her as unworthy. Jayesh had passed whatever arbitrary test Malphur had engineered, but Kari hadn't even been in the field in five years. What if she was the one who fell, who found herself succumbing to the whispers?

She hurriedly pushed that thought away, burying the fear. There was too much at stake for her to drift that direction. Besides, she remembered the whispers with hideous clarity - like poison dripping into her soul.

As she stood there, grappling with this, Jayesh said, "Let's head back to the ship. As soon as this transponder goes off, we can set a course."

They hiked through the strange forest, until the fungal growths gave way to more ordinary alder and birch, their young leaves a vibrant yellow in the changing seasons. Kari's ship was docked in a meadow at the foot of the hill, dry weeds reaching nearly to its underbelly.

As the two Guardians moved close enough for a transmat, Neko said in Kari's head, "Ship coming."

"Guardian?"

"I don't know."

This sent up a red flag in her mind. Neko knew every kind of ship - human, Fallen, Cabal, or Hive. What kind of ship might be approaching that her ghost couldn't identify? She couldn't even see it yet, but its engine growled in the distance, like a jet.

"Phoenix can't identify the incoming ship," Jayesh said. "We'd better get ready to take off."

They transmatted aboard and strapped in, Kari flipping switches on the control panel with one hand. The computer began its preflight warmup.

The other ship flew overhead, traveling low, the backwash from its jets making the treetops shiver. It was a sleek, narrow-bodied fighter, with short wings and a jump drive bigger than the main engine. It could have been a modified Vanguard jumpship, except that the entire fuselage gleamed gold. It caught the sun with such a powerful yellow dazzle that Kari was nearly blinded.

"A golden ship?" she exclaimed. "Who is pretentious enough to fly a golden ship?"

Jayesh shaded his eyes. "I don't think that much gold paint exists in the whole City. No wonder we couldn't identify them."

The ship flew by again, this time dropping low enough for the pilot to transmat down into the meadow. The ship nosed upward and flew off to circle, as Guardians sometimes did when expecting a short mission.

The pilot was a slim, female figure wrapped in a hunter's cloak. As she turned to look at Kari's ship, purple gems flashed from the shoulders and neck of her cloak. She shrugged and walked away, up the hill toward the Shard and its polluted forest.

Kari lifted off. "Gold ship, jewels everywhere. Think she's been hanging around Calus?"

"I think so," said Jayesh. "But since when does Calus give out gold ships like that?"

Calus was the exiled emperor of the Cabal people. His enemies had put him in an opulent palace aboard a huge ship called the Leviathan and sent it out into the depths of space. While out there for knew knew how many years, the Leviathan had encountered something of the Darkness. A void, Calus had called it. He had gone out to meet it and returned broken. Certain that the universe was doomed to end in Darkness, he determined to be the last being alive at the end - and gave himself up to parties and excess. Thousands of other aliens had been invited aboard his palace before his ship had entered the solar system, all competing to become his Shadows, or most elite assassins. Then he learned of Guardians and it became his ambition to have one as his chief Shadow.

Jayesh hadn't gone near the Leviathan, currently in orbit near the centaur Nessus, out past Jupiter. But many other Guardians had, returning with stories of endless parties, feasting, and sports fighting among the semi-enslaved inhabitants of the pleasure ship. Calus sought to buy their loyalty away from the Vanguard and the Traveler. While many Guardians were happy to take Calus's lavish gifts of weapons and armor, none had entirely sold him their loyalty.

But none of them flew a gold-plated ship and wore a jewel-studded cloak, either.

Kari set a course back toward the City. But she had scarcely reached cruising altitude when Jayesh exclaimed, "The transponder's going off! Phoenix, quick!"

His ghost appeared and scanned the little instrument, which had lit up and was displaying a code. "Got it," Phoenix said. "Looks like the coordinates are for an asteroid out in the Reef."

Kari altered course to take them to orbit, instead, pushing her engines to max. The G-force flattened them to their seats. Phoenix disappeared.

After eight minutes of burn, the atmosphere sank away beneath them, the sky turning black with stars in it. Kari executed a gravity turn, putting them into a safe orbit and reducing the G-forces. The engine quieted.

"Phoenix, input the coordinates to the ship," Kari said.

The ghost reappeared. "Roger." He flew to the control panel and communicated with the ship's AI. As he did, Kari had the oddest sense of the ghost's cheerfulness at having been useful. How could that be? He wasn't her ghost.

"Neko, did you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

"Never mind." She was the only one sensing it, then. It had happened before, in brief flashes - this ability to sense her husband's ghost as if he were her own. Jayesh had mentioned once that he could sense her ghost sometimes, too. Her theory was that marriage was tampering with their neural bonds - particularly the marriage union. After all, there had been a time when she had actually given Jayesh her own Light supercharge, and it had saved his life.

All these thoughts flashed through her head as Phoenix communicated with the ship's computer. A new destination appeared on screen - an asteroid in the Reef, secured to other asteroids with the remains of wrecked ships, deep within the atmosphere layer. The ship calculated a course, and Kari locked it in. "Near-light speed jump in ten minutes."

She glanced at her husband. He was gazing out the window, fingering his lower lip, in an attitude of pensive worry.

"Hey," she said softly. "It's all right."

He gave her a faint smile. "Sure."

She rubbed his shoulder, trying to convey that he wasn't alone in this venture. He took her hand and kissed her palm, twice. "Thanks," he whispered.

They reached the jump point and Kari activated the NLS drive. Just before the jump, her radar picked up the presence of a second ship. Then the ship's jump drive surged, the sky blurred, and they were safely in the jump.

"There was another ship just now," Kari said, cycling the radar screen backwards. "Oh no ... Jay, does this look like that gold ship to you?"

He leaned forward and studied the screen. "Yes ... that same weird shape. Were they following us?"

"I don't know. Do you think Malphur contacted multiple people?"

Jayesh frowned. "I don't think he would ... would he? And we got the transponder. Could they track us?"

"If their ghost was fast, they could capture our angle and extrapolate our destination." Kari looked at her course. "And I had a straight shot to the Reef. No course corrections. Dammit."

They waited, anxiously watching the computer. Earth had been in a favorable position relative to the asteroid belt. At their speed, it would only take two hours to reach it, as opposed to other jumps with course corrections, which might take eight or twelve hours.

But nothing appeared in jump space with them, and when they reached the Reef, no ships waited for them.

The Reef had been formed during humanity's Collapse. As the Darkness approached, a million alien ships in its train, humanity had taken to every ship they could find and fled the planet - only to meet the very force of Darkness itself near the asteroid belt. Every ship but one had been destroyed, creating a vast graveyard of dead ships and dead bodies within them.

The single ship that had survived had been caught in a blast between Dark and Light, been compressed into a singularity called a kugelblitz, and been rewritten into reality as a people reborn. This was the origin of the Awoken, beautiful, elf-like people with blue skin and glowing eyes who had terraformed the Reef and lived deep within it.

However, the transponder directed them away from the inhabited areas of the Reef. They landed carefully upon a small plain created by asteroids lashed together with cables and twisted slabs of metal. A haze of atmosphere surrounded this area, blue and fragile, a few clouds drifting only a hundred meters from the ground.

When Kari and Jayesh transmatted outside, they were struck by a gust of icy-cold wind. Gravity was lower, and it was hard to stand upright. Holding hands to steady each other, they walk-skipped across the first asteroid, jumped a deep chasm, and descended to a lower asteroid that blocked the wind a little. Down lower, it was a bit warmer, and moss clung to the rocks.

Deep in a jagged grotto, they came upon the chest.

It was a small chest, two feet square, very old and weathered. It was the same color as the surrounding stone. If they had not had the transponder to beep as they drew near, they might not have ever seen it.

Jayesh knelt over the chest. "I'll do it." He ran his hands along the lid until he found the catch. The lid swung open.

Inside was nothing but Thorn.

It was a heavy pistol called a hand cannon, long barrel, high caliber, and with a kick so hard that Guardians often broke their wrists if their grip was wrong. But what made Thorn unique was the black bone that had been burned into the barrel, all around the cylinder, and infused into the hilt. It was jagged and thorny, and a glint of green light glowed near the end of the barrel, unsettlingly like an eye.

Kari waited for a blast of cold, a sense of evil, or something else. But the weapon just lay there in the chest, not threatening in the least.

Jayesh pulled out a cloth, wrapped it around his hand, and lifted the gun out. He held it gingerly by the grip, turning it this way and that, looking at it. He slowly stood up.

"Feel anything?" Kari asked him.

Jayesh was silent. He stood there, staring at Thorn in his hand.

"Jay?" Kari asked.

Suddenly Jayesh threw the gun back into the chest, cloth and all. He fell to his knees, tore off his helmet, and vomited into the rocks.

Kari held his shoulders, wincing, feeling him retch. What kind of reaction was this? He hadn't even touched Thorn, not really. She certainly sensed nothing from the gun.

The vomiting ceased. Jayesh sat there on his knees, hugging himself and shaking. He gasped in the thin atmosphere, staring at nothing.

"What happened?" Kari asked, retrieving his helmet.

He slowly pulled it on, reattaching the clasps. "It took ... it took my Light. I couldn't feel it. It was like Riven. I swear Riven had me. I was pinned down - under those great filthy claws. She was ... laughing and ... and destroying my eyes ... tearing out my Dawnblade."

Kari pulled him into a hug. He embraced her tightly, still trembling. A few years earlier, Jayesh had tried rescuing people from a lethal time loop by escaping through a dimension frequented by the Hive. But a dead dragon waited there - an Ahamkara called Riven who could never truly die. She had devoured his Light, leaving him changed forever. Jayesh had never really recovered, although he had regained his Light and retrained as a Sunsinger.

If touching Thorn made him relive his worst memory, then he simply wouldn't be able to touch it at all.

"Don't worry," Kari told him. "We'll burn it. Right there, in the chest. You don't have to touch it."

"Not here," he said. "Not enough oxygen for fire. We'll have to take it inland-"

"Gold ship incoming," both their ghosts interrupted.

"Coming fast," Neko added. "Blast, that guardian has already transmatted out. She's almost here."

Kari closed the chest and tried to lift it, but it was bolted to the stone. She cursed, snatched up the cloth, wrapped it around her hand, and lifted Thorn out of the chest.

"Don't!" Jayesh exclaimed, too late.

Darkness clamped down over Kari. Instantly she was back in the Last City as the cage closed around the Traveler, stealing the Light from her blood and heart. Cold death closed around her - cold and silence and isolation. She still stood there beside Jayesh, still stood on the asteroid, but her Light was gone. Her ghost was silenced. Nausea crept through her stomach.

A cloak-wrapped figure appeared on the edge of the grotto above them. Jewels glinted on its shoulders.

"Ah," said the figure in a strong female voice. "It seems I'm too late." In one smooth motion, she drew a sleek hand cannon with gold scrollwork embellishing the barrel. "Hand over that gun."

Slowly, moving through that silent cold, Kari raised Thorn and aimed it at the stranger. "I'll drink your Light." The words seemed to come from outside herself, from some mind alien to her own. Through the cold, black void in her hand, she sensed the Light burning within the stranger, warm and powerful, beckoning like the scent of warm blood to a starving wolf.

Beside her, Jayesh said in a low, even voice, "If you value your life, Guardian, stand down."

Kari's finger sought the trigger.

The stranger saw the tiny movement. She lowered her weapon, turned and was gone.

Kari exhaled, slowly, her icy breath fogging the inside of her helmet. She slowly turned to face her husband, arm still outstretched, the weapon of darkness seeking another target.

Jayesh moved so fast, she saw only a flash of orange. He hit her arm, knocking Thorn out of her grasp. He shoved her backwards, sending her staggering until she hit the cliff wall. There she stood, leaning against the jagged stone, as Jayesh exploded into full Sunsinger and attacked the weapon.

She had only ever seen him draw on his Sunsinger power one other time, when he had taken her to the training grounds outside the City to show her what he could do. Here in this grotto, he was so close, the heat of his Light singed her through her armor. Blazing wings of fire billowed from his shoulders, capable of hurling him into the sky, if he wished. Fire swirled down his shoulders to his hands, where he gathered it into fireballs and lashed them at the weapon on the ground. And was it a trick of the light, or was Thorn actually writhing, the bone squirming and trying to escape the overwhelming Light?

Then it was too bright to look at anymore. Kari slid to the ground and covered her helmet with both arms. Her own Light had returned the moment she dropped Thorn, but the cold remained - such chill had invaded her limbs. She almost wished that Jayesh would turn his fire on her, to purge away whatever corruption Thorn had been spreading into her.

"Kari," Neko said in her head, almost sobbing. "Kari, that was horrible. We were almost - Don't ever leave me like that again! It was cutting us apart, I could feel it!"

She opened her cupped hands. Her ghost appeared between them, his blue eye contracted to an anguished dot. She hugged him to her chest, stroking the little blue shell. "I'm here, Neko," she whispered, comforting him as she would have Connor or Stephanie. "I didn't leave. It didn't get me."

"Jayesh saved you," Neko whispered. "He got it away from you. You would have killed him if he hadn't."

She would have killed him. This knowledge sat in her head, heavy and cold as stone. She had fully intended to kill someone, someone with Light, and feed. The horror of this coiled through her like a python and curled about her throat, choking her. She would have murdered her own husband in cold blood, and she had barely had Thorn in her hand a minute. She clutched Neko a little tighter and made herself stare into the white-hot spot where Thorn had been, and where Jayesh continued to pour his fire.

As she did, she picked up the rhythm of his movements. Each fireball was hurled in time with a silent song created by Jayesh himself, a song in the roar and crackle of fire. She had seen Sunsingers at work long ago, but had never been close enough to sense their song. Almost she felt the melody of it, the fierce joy and protective anger Jayesh was drawing out of himself on her behalf. He couldn't fight Thorn in his own, but when it threatened his wife, he suddenly had the strength to burn it to cinders.

Kari was on her feet without realizing she had stood, letting Neko disappear. She stepped forward, into the melody, into the fire.

Jayesh turned toward her, his eyes glowing white behind his helmet's faceplate. His nearest fiery wing brushed across her, scorching her, and she didn't care. She held out both hands.

Jayesh seemed to shrink a little. His fiery wings faded, and the fire stopped cascading down his arms. Soon he simply stood there, himself again, breathing heavily, his robe smoking a little. His gloves were hot as he took her hands. As he hugged her, his robe nearly set hers ablaze. But at the same time, it warmed the deadly chill inside her, erasing it, bringing her back to life.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I'm sorry," he whispered back.

They held each other as his fire cooled and she grew warm again. "It had me," Kari whispered again.

"I know," Jayesh replied. "I could feel it."

"You could?"

"I felt your Light go out."

"I would have killed you."

"I know."

There wasn't much more to be said. Kari leaned her helmet against his. "I guess we can go home now."

"Wait," Jayesh replied. He stepped around her, peering toward the burned spot on the stone that had once been a hand cannon.

The fire had quickly gone out in the thin atmosphere. The stone had been scorched white and begun to crack. In the middle of this spot lay the weapon that had been Thorn. The outline was still there, the bone now burned to lime and plastered into the stone. It had left behind the steel frame of the gun beneath - a plain-looking hand cannon, the metal now half-melted as well as pitted by years of exposure to rotting bone. But along the barrel remained the faint design of a rose.

Jayesh knelt to look closer. Kari did the same. "I remember the story," she breathed. "In his strong hand, the man held a Rose. That was the gun that became Thorn. But I thought that was just ... poetic embellishment."

Jayesh nudged the frame out of the hot spot and onto cooler rock. All that remained of the pistol's grip was a strip of metal framing, the bone entirely burned away. He studied it as it cooled. "What if I remade it?"

"Into what?" Kari said. "It looks pretty wrecked."

"Something good," Jayesh said. "Look, I just burned the bone off it with Light. And we revealed Rose underneath. So ... what if I rebuilt Rose? Made it bloom again?"

"That would be a poke in the Darkness's eye," Kari said, grinning.

"Right," Jayesh said, grinning, too. "And it'll never feed on Light again." He picked it up by the end of the grip frame. "Let's get out of here before Miss Amethyst comes back."

Chapter Text

They returned to the ship, talking, making little jokes, trying to disperse the aura of horror that still hung over them. Kari set a course for Earth and held herself together, pretending she hadn't just tasted deepest Darkness. She could almost convince herself that she hadn't really been going to pull the trigger on the man next to her, the one who meant more to her than the Traveler, itself.

She held herself together as they arrived home and she picked up the kids. Jayesh took the remains of Rose to Banshee, the Tower's weapons expert, to see if it could be salvaged.

By this time, it was quite late. The little family had a belated dinner and went to bed.

But once in bed, in the dark, Kari couldn't hold it together anymore. She summoned Neko and held him to her cheek as she cried. Jayesh wrapped his arms around her from behind and held her as sob after sob wracked her.

Neko had held himself together as his Guardian had. But now that she was finally facing what had happened, he could, too. The little robot wept tears of Light that mingled with hers and vanished in sparkles. Nearby, Phoenix appeared and landed beside her on the pillow, leaning his rounded shell against her hair.

The four of them cuddled like that, comforting each other without words. Jayesh stroked her hair and shoulder, letting her cry. But when he began to tremble, it was her turn to hold him.

"Why can't we beat this?" he whispered.

"It's stronger than us," Kari replied, feeling Neko snuggle into her hair alongside Phoenix. "It took me over, easy as anything. Maybe I'm soft from not being in the field. Easy target."

"That can't be it," Jayesh whispered fiercely. "It did the same thing to me, and I've been in the field for years. It was just ... too strong. But it wasn't strong enough to escape my Light. Did you hear it scream as I burned it?"

"It screamed?"

"Like a Hive witch. Faintly." He drew a deep breath and clutched her closer. "They say the Hive has studied us since they arrived in this system. How to destroy us from within, how to tempt us into following the Darkness. It's all part of this ... this sick seduction. Thorn had killed so many Guardians and drank their Light, it would have simply dragged us down sorrow's road whether we wanted to or not."

"And you burned it," Kari snarled, joyfully. "Burned off all that foul bone. No more whispers."

"No more whispers." Jayesh burrowed his head under her chin and hid his face against her neck. "When you started to turn on me ... I'm sorry I hit you like that."

"It was just my arm. I'll live."

He kissed her apologetically. "I had to knock it out of your hand. Oh, lovelight, I hope I never have to do that again."

She caressed him, her heart suddenly full. "Never again. Thorn is destroyed. All that's left is a broken Rose."

"Not that." He drew a long breath. "Attacking you at all. I never want to ... have to hurt you. I've felt guilty about it since the second I did it. It never occurred to me that I could hurt you. Really, actually hurt you. I don't do that. I'm a healer. But I nearly did."

"Shh," Kari replied. "You saved both our lives. It didn't hurt, and you had to disarm me somehow. I was going to ... to kill you and drink your Light." Her voice broke and she was crying again, once more facing the void she had nearly entered.

Jayesh growled and adjusted positions, pulling her close. "I'm glad I burned it. Nothing will ever do that to you again. Not my Kari. Not while a flicker of Light remains to me."

Kari cried herself to sleep in her husband's arms. When she awoke to see light gleaming around the edges of the curtains, hours later, she was still there, Jayesh asleep beside her, both their ghosts still cuddled against their heads on the pillows. Neko was asleep, but Phoenix's eye was open, watching her.

"Hello," she thought to him, as she did Neko.

To her surprise, Phoenix replied in her head, "Good morning. The Darkness no longer lingers."

"You mean Thorn's influence?"

"Yes, that," the ghost replied. She had never noticed what a sweet voice Phoenix had. Neko's voice was a little deeper, usually sharp and factual. But Phoenix's voice was a little higher, younger-sounding, with a bit of a melodious lilt. Maybe it was because of Jayesh being a Sunsinger.

"How can I hear you?" she thought. "You're not mine."

The ghost's eye turned to his own Guardian, snoring softly, so vulnerable in his sleep. "It's complicated. As your Light has mingled with his, the neural bonds have mingled, too. I can't explain it without going into a lot of technical brain chemistry."

"Does this happen to every couple?"

The blue eye met hers again. "Only Guardians, male and female. And only when they pledge exclusivity and stay together for years and years. Having multiple partners disrupts the bonding process. The neural link between partners' ghosts never happens."

"But ... I've been married once already. Doesn't that hurt things?"

Phoenix blinked slowly. "Well. Yes and no. Rem's been gone a long time, and you and Jayesh have been faithful. But I can feel Trina's footprint. It makes me sad."

"You can ... feel Rem's ghost? In my mind?" Tears blurred her eyes.

"Yes, where she used to be." Phoenix watched her. "Rem and Trina loved you very much. The marks are still there. And when you lost them ... it's all scarred. You only had him five years."

"Yes." Her breath caught in her throat. "And I've had Jayesh almost seven years."

Phoenix blinked. "That's only a few years difference."

"Do you think I'm doomed to lose him, too?" She gave Jayesh a worried look, thinking of him meeting the same fate as Rem - the Light ripped out of him by the Hive and stored in a huge crystal, like an obscene battery.

"We're not at war with the Taken King this time," Phoenix replied. "Jay's already survived Riven. I don't think you'll be rid of him that easily." Phoenix gazed fondly at his own Guardian. "He loves you so much. His brain is swamped in it. He's overwritten swaths of himself to love you better. It's been hard for him, you know."

"It has?" Kari thought, gazing at him. "Why?"

"Oh ..." Phoenix looked down. "He's worshiped the ground you walked on from the day you met. He doesn't consider himself a very good fighter. He'd much rather spend all his time reading and writing that book of his."

"He's writing a book?" Kari thought in surprise. "He never told me that!"

"Wait for him to tell you about it," Phoenix advised. "It's all about the Traveler, kind of a practical guide for Guardians looking to strengthen their Light."

Kari gazed proudly at her sleeping husband. "I had no idea. He's brilliant, you know."

"Yes," Phoenix said fondly, his eye slipping into a smile emote. "He's worked so hard to be a good husband to you. Doing work he hates to support you both. He drove himself to recover his Light and become a Sunsinger because of you and the children. He probably should have allowed himself more recovery time. It's been a long road back for both of us."

Neko's eye blinked on. He glanced at Kari, then Phoenix. "Are you two talking?"

"Yes," Phoenix replied, all three of them speaking mind to mind. "I hope it's all right with you, Neko."

"It's fine," Neko said slowly, wonderingly. "I just can't believe she can communicate so clearly. Is the mutual neural bond that advanced?"

Phoenix gazed at his brother, communicating in a data stream Kari couldn't catch. Neko blinked rapidly. "By the Traveler and all the stars. If it keeps on like this, we'll be a single unit, all four of us."

"And the two shall become one flesh," Phoenix replied. "Such ordinary magic, yet it's powered by the Light, itself. No wonder the Traveler marveled at humans."

Jayesh opened his eyes and looked at Kari, then the ghosts. "Can you three keep it down?" he said aloud. "Trying to sleep, here."

"We were communicating telepathically," Kari said. "Nobody actually said anything."

"No wonder you're all so loud," Jayesh groaned. "Kari, how do I have you and Neko in my head?"

"Apparently," Kari said slowly, "the marriage bond has interfered with our ghost bonds."

Jayesh smiled and raised a roguish eyebrow. "Does that mean I can flirt with you in front of people?"

She kissed him, a playful peck on the lips. "That's the first thing that occurs to you? Flirting?"

"Mmm, you know it is," Jayesh said. "I wonder if it works long distance. Imagine being able to talk while I'm on Ganymede."

"The ghost bond has limits," Phoenix pointed out. "I'm pretty sure you two are communicating through us."

"Aw." Jayesh sat up and stretched. "Think if they let you run dispatch, though. Remember that mission we had on Ganymede right after we met?"

Kari giggled. "You had to go catch one of those rat things in the ruins."

"They were cute!"

"And the floor was rotten. Down you went, crash, splat, Guardian down."

Jayesh pretended to look hurt. "You didn't have to laugh that hard about it." He sobered. "But yeah, you know the area. I'd love it if you ran dispatch for my team. Think they'd let you?"

Kari draped her arms around his shoulders. "It doesn't hurt to ask."

"He brought it back to the Tower?" Ikora said in a terrible voice.

Kari had gone to her commander to inquire about running the Ganymede mission. Ikora had asked about their Thorn excursion, and Kari had related what had happened.

Now Ikora glared at her in wrath, the beginnings of purple Void Light beginning to shimmer around her. "If this is another of your husband's little ideas ..."

"It's already been purged by Light," Kari said, hurriedly summoning her ghost. "Neko, show her the pictures and the readings. The bone is gone. All that's left is the frame, Rose, we think."

Neko projected floating holographic images and several graphs with the results of his own analysis. Ikora stepped forward and paged through the holograms, studying each, the dangerous purple Light fading from around her. Kari waited, biting the inside of her cheek, wondering if she and Jayesh were about to be in serious trouble.

But Ikora relaxed, and even smiled a little. "Well. It seems you did your due diligence. Your ghosts detect no further Darkness energy on the weapon frame. The frame's not good for much of anything, anymore. Why bring it back?"

"Jayesh wants to work on it," Kari replied. "Rebuild Rose, use it to fight for the Light, instead of the Darkness. Kind of symbolic."

Ikora appeared to consider this. She inclined her head. "A worthy thought. After all the despair the Vanguard has been through these past few years, we could do with a weapon of hope. Now. You asked about the Ganymede mission. Come to my desk and tell me what you know."

Kari spent the next hour examining maps, pointing out areas she knew, explaining about other missions she'd had. Ikora questioned her closely, especially about the boneyards and Kari's experiences there.

At last, Ikora said, "All right. I had already assigned another Guardian to work dispatch, but I'll add you to the roster. You and Silvan Nerisis have spent time on many of the same moons."

"Oh, I know Silvan," Kari said. "I thought she was off in the Dreaming City."

"She frequently runs strikes there, yes," Ikora said. "But she's laid up in the Tower with an injury, and has been operating as a dispatcher for various fireteams. You might be able to cheer her up."

"An injury?" Kari said blankly. "Can't her ghost heal her?"

"It's complicated," Ikora said. "I'm sure she'll explain everything."

"Kari?" Silvan said, pushing back her cherry-red hair. "What are you doing here?"

Kari had dropped by Silvan's apartment on her way home. Silvan lived in a different quarter, in the high rises hastily erected along the top of the wall after the Red War, when so many Guardians had lost their living quarters in the old Tower.

Silvan was a pretty Awoken warlock, with sky-blue skin sprinkled with glowing freckles. Her red hair had grown long and hung about her shoulders in ringlets. She leaned on a crutch, one leg bandaged from knee to ankle. A ghost in a purple shell peeked over her shoulder.

"I'll be helping you on dispatch with the mission tomorrow," Kari said. "Thought I'd come say hi, since I haven't seen you in a while. What's wrong with your leg?"

"Worm bite," Silvan replied, making a disgusted noise. "I was out in the Dreaming City, fighting Scorn, and I happened to hide in some bushes. Turns out, a bunch of Hive worms were hiding out in there, too. Nasty buggers. They tore up my leg and I had to grenade them. Turns out they're venomous and my ghost couldn't heal it. Had to come back here for the antidote. It's healing, but super slowly."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Kari said, giving her a hug. "Mind a little help?"

"That'd be great, actually," Silvan said, looking relieved. "Dad and Yuna are still out on Venus for another three weeks. I've been roughing it."

Kari looked at her bandaged leg. "Would you like me to bring you dinner tonight?"

"Oh, yes, please," Silvan said, her glowing silver eyes tearing up. "It's been so hard hobbling down to the mess hall."

"I transmat her everywhere," her ghost said. "This is my fault."

"No, it's not," Silvan said, tilting her head to gently bump him. "No ghost can heal worm venom."

Kari's heart went out to her - poor girl, all alone, with no one to look after her. Silvan had been resurrected as an eleven-year-old just before the battle of Twilight Gap. Even though she was grown up, now, Kari still saw her as that same little girl who had roamed the Tower with schoolbooks and a ghost.

"I'll come back tonight, about six," Kari said.

"Thank you," Silvan said.

Kari walked home, deep in thought about missions and how to help Silvan. When she arrived at their apartment, she found Jayesh sitting on the floor with Connor and Stephanie, building houses out of blocks for their stuffed animals. She entered, closing the door softly, and watched the three dark heads bent close together.

"This one has a roof like this," Jayesh was saying. "And here's the bed."

"My horsie sleeps on the bed," Stephanie said.

"My wolf doesn't need a bed," Connor said. "He lives in a fortress where he fights bad guys."

"Where's the door?" Jayesh asked.

Connor moved a block. "Right here. It's a secret passage."

Kari dropped onto the sofa, leaned her elbows on the back, and watched them. Jayesh looked up with a quick smile.

"Mama's home!" Stephanie exclaimed, scrambling to her feet. She toddled to the sofa and climbed up beside her mother, where she gave Kari's arm a dramatic hug.

Connor barely looked up. "Hi, Mom. Dad's building blocks with us. We have to get our houses built before the bad guys arrive." He pointed at several dinosaurs and Fallen action figures that were waiting off to one side.

"Looks serious," Kari said.

Jayesh straightened his back and rolled his shoulders. "How'd it go?"

"Ikora flipped her lid when I told her we brought the gun back. She was going to hunt you down and blow you up, I think. But I showed her the data and calmed her down."

Jayesh's eyes widened a little. Then he laughed. "Wow, good thing I have you to vouch for me. Being blown up would be a bad start to the day."

Kari explained about joining Silvan as dispatch. Jayesh was pleased to hear this, but he wasn't happy about her injury. "Worm venom! Has she tried healing rifts?"

"I imagine so, since she's a warlock," Kari replied.

Jayesh stood up, then, rubbing his lower back. "I'm going to drop by, see if I can help. Then I'm going to see what Banshee thinks of Rose."

"We'll all come," Kari said. "It'll be nice to get out of here for a while."

Chapter Text

A few minutes later, Jayesh and Kari were out on the Tower Walk again, Connor holding Kari's hand, and Jayesh carrying Stephanie.

"Can you still do a well of radiance?" Kari asked.

Jayesh frowned. "I think so. I mean ... It sort of works, even though my Light has changed. It heals, anyway."

"No sword anymore?"

"No." His voice was low and pained, as if speaking of a dead friend. "It's only a beam of Light shaped like my old sword. It makes me sad to see it, so I ... I haven't used it much."

His grief hit Kari like a fist to the gut. He'd been a Sunsinger two whole years, and he still missed his Dawnblade power. No more fiery sword, like an avenging angel. She remembered with absolute clarity the first time she had seen him use his power - he had been saving her from a huge robot called a Vex Gate Lord. His sword had sliced off its limbs and destroyed its eye. He'd been tiny compared to the robot, and yet unstoppable.

So much fire and courage from the young warlock. Then she found out he had just completed his training and was so poor, he could barely afford food. Her crush on him had begun that day. She had denied it for a long time - he was so young, both as a Guardian and a person, and she felt miserably like any kind of relationship would be preying on him. So she kept it strictly professional for a couple of years ... until he confessed his feelings for her. Awkwardly. It still made her face burn to think of how badly it had gone, and how he had avoided her for weeks afterward. She'd be making it up to him the rest of their lives.

They arrived at Silvan's apartment. Silvan was waiting at the door, looking out for them. Their ghosts had been communicating about Jayesh attempting to heal her.

"Excellent!" she said as he arrived. "Jayesh Khatri, I can't believe I'm getting to meet you. You're like a legend."

Jayesh blinked, nonplussed. "I'm ... what, now?"

"You rescued those Corsairs from the Dreaming City time loop!" Silvan squealed. "The Reef is still talking about it. Is it true you healed the whole City during the plague winter?"

Jayesh's face flushed a deep crimson. "Uh, I, no, all the warlocks worked together, it wasn't-" He cleared his throat. "Let's go inside and see your injury."

They entered Silvan's apartment, which she shared with her father and stepmother. It was tidy enough, with worn, comfortable furniture.

"And you brought your kids!" Silvan squealed. "Bramble, look!"

Her ghost appeared and flew around Connor and Stephanie. "They're so little!" he exclaimed. "Even littler than you were!" He flew up to Connor, who grinned and pushed him away. Then Bramble flew to Stephanie, whom Jayesh had just set down on a sofa.

"You're pretty," Stephanie said. "Can I have you?"

"No, sorry," Bramble told her. "I already have a Guardian. But someday, maybe a ghost will find you."

Stephanie patted his purple shell, gently, as she'd been taught. Then Bramble flew back to Silvan and floated at her shoulder.

Silvan unwound the bandage around her leg. Her blue skin was marred with ugly purple bite marks, as if she'd been savaged by a large dog. The skin was red and swollen.

"I'm on three kinds of medication right now," Silvan told them. "It's the only way to keep the infection down. I have to have antidote injections every two days."

Jayesh examined the wounds. "I'm going to try using my healing sword on this. It will pass through your leg, and it may hurt at first. But it can heal anything."

Silvan bit her lip, but nodded. "All right. Nobody's tried that on me, yet." She smiled, a little shakily. "Leave it to the great Jayesh to think outside the box."

Jayesh swallowed. "I'm just a healer, Silvan. I can't promise great results. I've never tried to heal worm bite before. Here, sit on the floor with your leg stretched out."

Kari retreated to the sofa with Stephanie and Connor. All their ghosts appeared, Phoenix, Neko, and Varan, and watched intently.

Jayesh positioned Silvan just so, glancing around at the furniture to make sure they had enough room. Then he stood over her a moment, composing himself, reaching for his Light. Kari waited in suspense.

"What's Daddy doing?" Stephanie asked.

"He's going to heal her with Light," Kari said. "Watch."

The room fell silent, all eyes fixed on Jayesh. He closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. Then suddenly, fire erupted all over him. Wings flickered at his shoulders. He raised both hands, drawing all that fire and Light together into a long beam of Light like a sword. Kari immediately saw the difference he had spoken of - it was no longer the ornate Dawnblade he had once wielded. Now it was merely a wedge of fiery Solar Light.

Jayesh drove it through Silvan's leg and into the floor. Light washed outward from the point of impact, swirling along the floor in an overcharged healing rift.

Silvan gasped and flinched, then sat hugging herself, staring at the immaterial blade protruding from her leg.

"Does it hurt?" Jayesh asked.

"Sort of," Silvan replied. "It's hot. But it feels ... healthy."

"Relax," Jayesh told her. "It's possible to resist healing Light. Try to take it in as much as you can. What discipline are you?"

"Dawnblade," Silvan replied. "But kind of ... mixed with Arc Light? It drives Ikora nuts, because I have a lightning sword and a lightning gun I can summon. It's not normal, she says."

Jayesh laughed and met Kari's gaze, suddenly wistful. "That's different, yes. But you know how healing rifts work."

"Oh yes," Silvan said. "It's how I made it back to the Tower without the worm venom killing me. My fireteam never let me out of a healing rift."

He knelt and examined her leg around the edges of the glowing sword. "Look, the wounds are shrinking. And this one has closed entirely."

Silvan leaned forward to look. "It's working! By the Light, something's finally stronger than those stupid worms!" She settled back again and closed her eyes.

Kari said, "What do you know about Ganymede?"

Silvan opened her eyes, smiling. "Oh, I love the Jovian moons. I've spent years studying them. Ganymede, Calypso, Europa, and Io. Plus the little ones. Jupiter has seventy-nine moons, you know. I feel like I've barely scratched the surface. Ganymede has those wonderful hot oceans and those jungle valleys. The Traveler did a nice job with it."

"Our fireteam is headed there tomorrow," Jayesh said.

"You're Fireteam Solarflare?" Silvan exclaimed. "No wonder Kari wants to help! Oh, this is so exciting! I'll be doing dispatch for Jayesh Khatri!"

"It's not that exciting," Jayesh muttered. "And the rift will expire in three, two, one ..."

The Light sword faded and disappeared in a sparkle and flash. The Light on the floor faded away. Silvan and Jayesh inspected her leg.

"It feels better," Silvan said, wiggling her toes. "The bites aren't so deep now, and the swelling's gone down. Can you do it again?"

"Once more, I think," Jayesh replied. "I have to save some energy for the mission tomorrow." Once more he summoned his Light, channeled it into a sword, and drove it through her leg. This time Silvan barely flinched.

"You're amazing," she breathed. "Kari, you're so lucky you married Jayesh Khatri!"

Kari smiled shyly and hugged the children a little tighter. Jayesh watched the sword and studiously avoided looking at anyone.

By the time the second spell expired, Silvan's leg was nearly healed. The most badly-poisoned bites lingered, but even they had become shallower, the fevered flesh around them cooling a little.

"They barely hurt anymore now," Silvan said, carefully winding a fresh bandage around her leg. "Thank you! I usually have to sleep for four hours after running dispatch. I may not have to this time." She climbed to her feet, taking her crutch as Jayesh handed it to her. Then she leaned forward and planted a loud, wet kiss on his cheek. "There! Now I can say I've kissed Jayesh Khatri!"

Jayesh hastily retreated from her. Kari laughed a little and tried to hide the flare of jealous rage that surged in her heart. Silvan obviously hadn't meant anything by it, but still.

"Thanks so much!" Silvan said, escorting them to the door. "You don't know how good it feels to not be in pain. See you later, Kari!"

They bade her goodbye and walked toward the stairs in silence. As they descended them, Kari said, "So, you're famous."

Jayesh rubbed his cheek against his shoulder. "Notorious, more like. Let's never mention this again."

Kari knew she would speak of this again later - when she erased that kiss with plenty of her own. He wouldn't mind, then.

They made their way along the Tower Walk to Banshee-44's weapon shop. The old Exo's memory had been wiped forty-four times, leaving him with permanent damage. The only thing he remembered with any clarity was the firearms he worked on-and even then, he had a thick notebook full of diagrams and notes to remind himself about various parts.

When Jayesh, Kari, and their little ones arrived, Banshee gazed at them for a long moment without recognizing them. It wasn't until Jayesh asked about Rose that the Exo's blue eyes lit up. He lifted the pistol into view from beneath his counter.

"Bit of a challenge, this one," he said in his slow, raspy drawl. "Rotted and melted out of true. Had to machine the barrel. Replace the cylinder and hammer. Gave it new grip panels. It'll fire, but it's nothing special. No Light. No mods. You want mods? I can add some."

"Not this time, Banshee," Jayesh said, accepting Rose and examining it. "I want to try using it a little, first, before I decide what to do with it."

The Exo nodded. "Suit yourself, Guardian. You get stuck, I know guns."

Other Guardians were already waiting behind them, so the little group moved aside. Kari held out a hand. "Can I see?"

Jayesh gave her an uneasy look, obviously thinking about the last time she had handled this weapon, but he gave it to her. This time, however, nothing happened. The gun was heavy, its new parts bright and gleaming. But the barrel was the same pitted, scratched metal with the rose etched into it. It was only a high caliber revolver now.

"I want to see!" Connor exclaimed.

Kari held it where he could see, turning it back and forth. "Don't touch. Remember, guns aren't for children."

"But I get to use them when I'm older?" Connor said hopefully.

"When you're older," Kari agreed. She also had a strong aversion to letting her son touch the weapon that used to be Thorn. When his hand drifted toward the barrel, she lifted it out of reach. "Neko, store this for us."

Her ghost appeared and transmatted the weapon into his memory storage. Ghosts had the ability to break down matter into energy and data and carry it inside their Light-powered core. But there were limits to how much they could carry - several weapons and some ration packs were usually all they could manage.

Jayesh smiled. "I know it's a bit early for lunch, but do you want to grab something? Healing always makes me hungry."

"Can we have basbousa?" Connor asked, jumping up and down.

"Basbousa!" Stephanie repeated from her father's arms.

"Lunch first," Kari said firmly. She gave Jayesh a stern look. "You got them hooked on basbousa."

He shrugged with a sheepish grin. "It's honey cake. What's not to like?"

They made their way back along the Tower Walk, making for the little food court this time. While the Vanguard provided a mess hall for the Guardians, the food court served everyone else - and the mess hall didn't do the cheap, delicious junk food that the food court did.

Kari ordered ramen bowls for herself and the children, while Jayesh picked up an entire meal. There were plenty of tables free around the open-air dining area, so they picked one of the nicer ones, back under an awning, partially screened by a line of shrubs.

As they settled in, Kari asked the question foremost on her mind. "What do we do with Rose?"

Jayesh's mouth was full, so it took him a moment to answer. "I've been thinking about that. I want to use it for the Light, right? But it's just a gun. Not even a particularly good one." He paused to shovel more food in his mouth. Kari ate, too, and waited. The children were happily dipping piles of crackers in their soup.

"Think of it like this," Jayesh said after a moment. "Thorn was more than a weapon. It was a symbol of malice. It stood for Dredgen Yor and his spiral into Darkness. Just looking at the thing reminds you of who he was and what he did."

Kari nodded and twirled noodles around her spoon. "Right. It's what all those imitation Thorns aspire to be."

Jayesh nodded and inhaled another few bites. "So, what I'm thinking," he went on, "is that Rose needs to become the opposite. Instead of malice, it has to represent courage. Instead of taking, giving. Selflessness instead of selfishness."

"Okay," Kari said slowly. "But how can a gun represent those things? It's a weapon for killing."

Jayesh exhaled. "I don't know that, yet. But I do know that I want to attune it to my Light. I've seen people tune their guns that way - there's this alloy that you solder along the grip and the cylinder. Lightweave, I think it is. They always have some down in the mod shop."

"You can head over there after this," Kari said. "Yor tuned Thorn to his Darkness, right? I mean, the gun was a piece of work, but it was the man who corrupted it."

"They devoured each other," Jayesh said, "but Yor was the one who chose the path."

"So," Kari went on, "it stands to reason that you could spin it the other way. A weapon of Light. Maybe it would, I don't know, seek out and burn away Darkness or something. Or become like your own personal Golden Gun."

"All of the above?" Jayesh grinned. "I don't know, at this point. But that's the direction I'm heading. I'll get it modded and take it on the mission tomorrow. We'll probably see plenty of action, if I remember anything about Ganymede."

Kari nodded and passed out more crackers. Jayesh fell silent, his eyes unfocused as he worked on his lunch, his mind far away from their little table. Kari smiled to see it. He'd had his head in the clouds since they'd met - always theorizing or planning. The only time it scared her was when he meditated and communicated with the Traveler. He seemed to think he was friends with it. That was all right for him, but Kari always freaked out a little when the Traveler answered her hesitant plea for more Light.

She glanced at the huge cracked sphere hanging in the sky. It didn't look alive. The holes in its surface showed machinery and mechanical framing beneath. So ... what was she actually talking to, in there? It made goosebumps rise on her arms.

After lunch, the children were tired, so Kari took them home for naps. Jayesh retrieved Rose and went off to the mod shop, whistling cheerfully.

Connor and Stephanie were full of lunch and tired from their exciting morning, and went down for naps with minimal protest. Kari went to her room for a few hours of blessed alone time. She immediately pulled out a model of a colony ship she had been building for months, whenever she had a few minutes of free time. It was four feet long and lived in the weapons chest in the corner of the room. She was building it of little pieces of scrap metal and wire that she had picked up on various missions years ago.

Rem had introduced her to the fun of model building. She had joined his club of Guardians who collected scrap and mosses and other tiny things and turned them into ships and model buildings. Rem's masterpiece, a diorama of the Cosmodrome in Russia, had been destroyed in the attack on the Tower in the Red War. All the models on display in the Tower cantina had been ruined. The surviving members of the model club had gotten back together and vowed to rebuild their collection better than before. Already, new models of ships decorated the various offices along the Tower Walk.

But that much more of Rem's memory had been destroyed.

Kari's thoughts wandered to him as she snipped metal and twisted wires. Rem would have loved the challenge of building a colony ship. She remembered his rough hands guiding hers as he taught her to cut sheet metal into strips with heavy shears. He had been so much bigger than her, a self-assured Titan who had driven her nuts for ages ... until she killed him in the Crucible and he asked her to dinner afterward. Something had clicked between them, then. A wall had come down. And she had loved him passionately.

She still felt the hole his death had left in her soul. The emptiness. The longing to see him and tell him things, show him things, to hear him laugh again. Perhaps if he had died as a Guardian should, his Light returning to the Traveler, she might have had hope of seeing him again someday. But the Hive had ripped out his Light and stored it in a crystal ... and what happened to the soul? Jayesh thought the soul, the spark, was poured off, but nobody knew for sure.

This quiet despair was the hardest part about Rem's death - the lack of any hope at all for meeting him in the afterlife.

Tears fell onto the metal in her hands. Kari wiped them away and went on working. You have Jayesh, she told herself fiercely. You have Connor and Stephanie. It's a new era, so stop living in the past. Move forward.

But the tears kept falling for a long while.

Chapter Text

The Tower mod shop was a concrete building just outside the hanger. It had heavy tables, several furnaces, boxes and boxes of tools, torches for cutting and welding, and lockers filled with parts and materials. One corner was occupied by a bookcase loaded with books and magazines put out by SUROS, OMOLON, and the other weapon manufacturers, filled with blueprints and modding ideas for their various weapon types.

A few other Guardians were there, bent over their projects, their ghosts watching closely. It smelled of hot metal and oil. Jayesh found it pleasant and exciting. He hadn't had much opportunity to mod weapons, although he avidly consumed each new magazine when it arrived.

He secured a work table and laid Rose on it, then went to the supply lockers. He hunted a spool of Lightweave and carried it to the table.

Phoenix appeared at his shoulder, his red and yellow shell a flash of color. "Need help?"

"All the advice you can give," Jayesh said. "I've seen Lightweave applied to a rifle, but not a hand cannon."

A nearby Guardian looked up - a burly Titan with red hair and a mechanical leg. "Hey, Jayesh. You looking to do a Light Reactor mod?"

"Hey, Claney," Jayesh replied. He'd worked with Claney Beamard before, and found the Titan's sheer size slightly intimidating. "Not exactly Light Reactor - I don't want this weapon to charge other weapons. I want to channel my Light through this one."

Claney walked over and picked up Rose, turning it over. "I see why it needs mods. This thing's dead."

Jayesh nodded. It was an odd thing to describe, the sense of a dead weapon. But some guns had been handled so much by their Guardians, had been so modified and had so much Light poured into them, that they fairly leaped to life in one's hands. Sometimes they almost seemed to develop different personalities that varied with the type of ammunition used. Guardians called this phenomenon 'perks', and weapons with good perks were highly sought after.

Rose had nothing. No perks. No Light. Banshee had been correct in his assessment that Rose needed mods. It was the only way to start building its personality back into something useful to a Guardian.

Claney went to his table and returned with the auto rifle he'd been working on. "Adding a hip-fire grip to this guy. Good ol' Fabian Strategy, had it for years. Good perks. Here."

He handed it to Jayesh, who immediately felt the difference. The rifle hummed with invisible energy. Maybe that had been what made Thorn so terrifying - its perks had been powerful and bent toward evil. He was glad he hadn't taken the time to find out what they had been.

Jayesh examined the Fabian Strategy rifle. Faint threads of Lightweave and other metals had been worked into the grip, around the magazine, and all the way down the barrel. "How would you do this for a hand cannon?"

Claney began turning Rose over, pointing here and there, explaining the way Light would flow through the weapon, enhancing the firing mechanism, adding extra punch to each bullet. Jayesh listened carefully, retrieved some paper, and began sketching ideas of where the Lightweave ought to go. Their ghosts looked on, sometimes offering suggestions.

By the end of the day, Jayesh had welded the Lightweave wire around the grip, under the cylinder, and down the barrel in a root-like design. It wasn't pretty, but now Rose felt a little more receptive to his hand. When he took it to the Tower's firing range, it seemed to respond a little faster after a few rounds. Definitely a start.

"Meet back here tomorrow?" Claney said. "We could try a few more things."

"I'm off on a mission tomorrow," Jayesh said.

"Right," Claney said. "And I've got a strike the day after. See you when I see you, then."

The Guardians parted ways. Jayesh had Phoenix store Rose away, and walked home in the chilly autumn dusk. Every window was loaded with candles for the upcoming Festival of the Lost, the holiday to honor dead family members and teammates.

Kari always lit candles for Rem, as well as other friends she had lost. But only Rem got the giant five-pound candle that burned for days and days. Jayesh lit candles for the brother he barely remembered, who had been the cause of his first death. He also lit them for the woman he couldn't save from being Taken, and from the people doomed to die in the Dreaming City time loop over and over. He also lit one for their teammate Madrid, who was serving time and might never be freed from his sentence.

But none of them haunted him the way Rem haunted Kari.

It gave Jayesh a sad, lost feeling. He couldn't be jealous of a dead man, and Kari was careful never to compare him unfavorably with her first husband. It was more like being left out, of never having the chance to meet this man Kari thought was so wonderful. She would go months without mentioning Rem - and then along came a holiday like Festival of the Lost, bringing back the memories.

Jayesh never mentioned who his candles were for. As he walked, he ran each person through his head and mentally looked at Rose. The weapon's mods seemed so inadequate compared to the immensity of grief and loss its previous version had brought about. During the Festival, there was an entire shrine dedicated to victims of Thorn. It had two hundred and sixteen candles.

Rose had to be the antithesis of that, somehow. A symbol of protection and hope. Tomorrow, he'd use it in service of his fireteam, to support and protect them. Maybe some of his intent would work its way into the gun's makeup through his Light.

As he pondered this, he noticed two familiar figures at the Tower railing, gazing across the City as all its lights came on. He grinned and walked up to join them at the rail. "Hey guys."

"Hey, Jayesh," said Nell. She was a hunter, shorter than him, with fair skin and jet black hair. She'd been part of Jayesh's fireteam since their first foray into the Reef - spunky, daring, and deadly with knives.

Beside her stood Grant-4, Exo Titan, who stood well over six feet tall, even out of armor. He wore casual clothes, jeans and a jacket. The only thing that gave him away as an Exo were his glowing orange eyes and black metal head. He was a more recent addition to their team, mostly so Nell could stop being so terrified of him. It must have worked, because they'd been an item for the past two years.

"Ready for tomorrow?" Jayesh asked.

"Yep," Nell said, folding her arms tightly. "Man, this wind is cold. Ganymede better be warm, because I'm sick of the cold already."

"Allow me," Grant said. He slipped off his jacket and draped it around Nell's shoulders. She smiled up at him gratefully and put her arms through the jacket arms. Her hands didn't come within shouting distance of the ends of the sleeves, but it looked warm.

"Won't you be cold?" Nell asked Grant, who now stood there in a faded t-shirt with a Crucible logo on it.

"I don't mind cold the way you do, Firefly," he replied. "I think this breeze feels good." He turned his orange eyes on Jayesh. "To answer your question, yes, we are prepared. We've been choosing our weapons with care. I will run an auto rifle and an SMG for mid to long range field coverage. Nell will run her customary knives and a pulse rifle for near to mid range engagement. What will you run?"

Jayesh had his ghost transmat Rose into his hands. "I've been working on this hand cannon, trying to work some decent perks into it." He handed it to Nell, who fished her hands through the huge jacket in order to take it.

"Wow," she said, holding it up and peering down the sights. "This thing is garbage. Why don't you run Sturm? That's a decent hand cannon."

Jayesh glanced around to make sure no other Guardians were within earshot. "Can you keep this on the down-low?"

Nell and Grant nodded, focusing on him with sudden interest.

Jayesh told them about Shin Malphur gifting him the original Thorn in all its dubious glory. He described how he had burned off the bone mods with his Light, omitting how it had seized control of Kari. "So now, I'm trying to rebuild it into a weapon that fights for the Light. I just have to use it in the field for it to pick that up."

Nell studied Rose with new respect, then passed it to Grant, who examined it closely.

"What a fearsomely difficult project," Grant remarked. "Wresting an instrument of Darkness away from the Darkness, itself. I'll be interested to see how you move forward with such a goal. I have been studying weapon modding, myself, but it is a vast topic."

They fell to discussing various famous weapons, with their mods and perks. The twilight faded around them and the Tower lights came on. The wind beat into their faces. Jayesh's ears began to ache with cold. Nell began to shiver, even inside Grant's jacket.

In his head, Phoenix said, "Message from Kari. Dinner's ready."

"Tell her I'll be there in a few minutes," Jayesh thought.

Aloud, he said, "Well, I'll see you two later. We'll talk more on the mission tomorrow."

"Right," Nell said through chattering teeth. "I gotta get inside and drink some tea or something."

"I'll take care of you, Firefly," Grant assured her, putting an arm around her shoulders. "Come along, it'll be much warmer indoors."

They parted ways. Jayesh descended the stairs to the apartment level down in the wall and opened his door.

Kari was busy in the kitchen. Connor was climbing from chair to chair around the table, carefully setting each place with a fork, a plate, and a cup. But Neko, Kari's ghost, was following along behind, knocking each item out of place.

"Neko, stop it!" Connor yelled, pushing plates back. "Mom! Make Neko stop!"

"Neko, behave," Kari said without looking up.

Neko gazed defiantly at Connor. "This is how I behave." He spun his shell and flicked a fork off the table.

Connor screamed in rage, lunged across the table, seized Neko in both hands, and bit his shell. Neko shrieked.

Kari whirled around and charged at the table, yanking Neko away from Connor. She smacked them both, sent Neko into phase in disgrace, and hugged Connor.

Jayesh stood beside the door, trying to laugh in silence. But he must have made a sound, because Kari looked up and met his gaze. She began to laugh, too. She beckoned him to the table and kissed him when he arrived.

"What did I walk into?" Jayesh asked.

"Domestic life with small children and bratty ghosts," Kari replied. She turned her head, listening to Neko's protests in her mind, and said aloud, "I'll talk to you about this later."

"Neko hates me," Connor said, retrieving the fork from the floor. "He's always messing up my stuff."

"You two need to find ways to get along," Jayesh said, taking his place at the table. He ruffled Stephanie's hair, where she was sitting in her high chair, eating a carrot without a word. Jayesh added, "You don't fight with Phoenix, do you?"

"Phoenix is nice," Connor said. "He doesn't go around knocking over my toys."

Phoenix appeared beside Jayesh and projected an image of wings and a halo above himself.

"It's going to be very unpleasant around here if you don't get along," Jayesh admonished Connor. "I have to go on a mission tomorrow, so you'll be the man of the house. The man of the house doesn't fight with ghosts."

"Hey!" Neko exclaimed, popping into view. "I'm technically the eldest male in the household!"

Kari glared at him until Neko shrank together and vanished again.

"Point is," Jayesh continued, "you're five now. I need you to look after your mother and sister for me. You're a Guardian, and that's a Guardian's job."

Connor nodded soberly. "I'll be a good Guardian, Dad. I'll just ignore Neko when he's being mean. Are ghosts ever mean to you?"

Jayesh hesitated and glanced at Kari. "Not in the same way. But it happens."

Kari put dinner on the table, then - a steaming chicken casserole with gravy and vegetables topped by crumbled bread and spices. It was the perfect dinner for a cold evening.

That night, after the children were in bed, Kari took Neko aside and gave him a talking to. Jayesh discreetly locked himself in the bathroom until the shouting had died down. When he finally dared peek out, Kari was sitting on the bed with Neko in her hands, gazing into his eye and stroking his shell. She was still speaking in a low, earnest voice.

"And that's why you can't do this. Do you understand?"

"I understand," Neko said, sounding tearful. "I'll be the best ghost you could ask for from now on."

"Good." Kari kissed his eye and let him go. Neko vanished.

She turned to Jayesh with a tired smile. "So. That's dealt with."

Jayesh knew Neko, and he doubted the ghost would ever change, but at least he'd be on his best behavior for now. Jayesh returned her smile, ventured into the bedroom, and stood gazing at her for a long moment.

Kari's purple hair suited her, somehow, brighter at the tips, darker at the roots. It matched the wine-colored pajamas she had on. Her face continually fascinated him - her cheeks were so smooth and curved, yet her eyes had a depth that spoke of her century of life as a Guardian. Her smooth brow could furrow in a frown in combat, and yet her lips were so soft and full. She had fallen for him for some reason he couldn't fathom, married him, birthed his children. As he gazed at her, he found himself gasping a little with a surge of adoration, and a sense of his own unworthiness.

Kari's smile faded. "What's the matter?"

"Oh, uh." Jayesh was suddenly that stammering, uncertain new Guardian he had been on their first mission, trying to appear suave and experienced, then missing his footing and falling headlong into the leaves. "You're beautiful," he blurted.

Her smile returned, playful this time. "Thank you." She patted the bed beside her.

But Jayesh stood there where he could see all of her, the way her pajamas hugged her figure, her bare feet that he knew must be cold.

"Light," he breathed. "Why did you ever marry me?"

She tilted her head to one side in a way he found irresistible. "Because I love you, silly."

"No, I mean ..." He trailed off, the words dying on the way to his mouth. He was an awkward kid and she was the experienced Guardian, so professional and level-headed. He hadn't even seen her face until after their first mission, because they'd had to keep their helmets on. But he wanted to grovel at her feet and worship her.

Kari held out a hand. "You're too far away over there. What's the matter? Freaking out about tomorrow?"

He hadn't given the mission a thought since he'd arrived home. He gulped, took her hand, and let her tug him down beside her. "I was just thinking ... unworthy worm."

Kari laughed. This was their code for when he was overthinking things and running himself down. She smoothed back his spiked hair and ran a hand down his face, which had developed a healthy five o'clock shadow. "You're worthy. You've always been worthy."

"But I ..." he stammered. "But you're amazing, Kari. You keep this place running, and manage the kids, and do meals, and you still put up with me. And I ..." His voice caught. He turned away and put his head in his hands. "And I exposed you to Thorn. All because I was too afraid to go alone."

"Hey." Her arms slipped around him. Her warm cheek pressed against his stubbly one. "No harm done, heartspark. Don't beat yourself up."

He nuzzled her, sliding an arm around her waist. She was so slim compared to him, so graceful and voluptuous. He breathed her in. "Kari ... I love you so much." The words were inadequate for what he was feeling right now.

She gazed into his eyes. Her eyes were brown with a hint of green. She smiled, yet sadness lingered in those eyes, a sadness he couldn't seem to drive away. It wrenched his heart.

"Thinking about Rem?"

Her eyes widened, and she immediately looked down. "How did you know that?"

"I can always tell," Jayesh said, watching her hands in her lap. "The tragedy in your eyes."

Slowly she lifted her eyelashes and gazed at him again. "It's that time of year. The anniversary of his death is coming up. Plus Festival of the Lost. And just ..." She turned her head and stared at nothing, just to break eye contact.

Jayesh looked down, too. They sat side by side, not looking at each other. Along with his awkward, newbie feelings came the sense that Rem had been better than him in every way, that he would never measure up. The fact that Kari still mourned Rem - and all Jayesh ever heard was what a wonderful person he had been - was a strong boost to Jayesh's constant sense of being an imposter.

"Don't," Kari whispered suddenly. "I don't want to sit here like this, not tonight. You're gone in the morning."

He looked up to see the sadness in her eyes again, but this time it was for him - much nearer, more desperate.

"I'm going to miss you so much," she murmured, her arms encircling him again. "Always wondering if you're all right."

"You'll be on dispatch," Jayesh pointed out, taking her in his arms. "You'll be listening in on everything."

"You're taking an untested weapon into combat," she whispered. "And I have to be professional. But tonight ... I'm not professional."

He grinned and kissed her tenderly. "Tonight ... neither am I."

Chapter Text

Kari's day started early the next morning.

Jayesh was out of the apartment by five, in order to meet up with Nell and Grant and begin the long run for the Jovian system. They would arrive after a six-hour trip with multiple course corrections.

Near noon, Kari dropped off the children with Naomi, who laughed that Kari now owed her two babysitting sessions. Then Kari headed for the headquarters building, where the Vanguard managed strike teams.

Each dispatcher had a little cubicle with computer monitors and microphones, with special equipment for their ghost to use, if necessary. Silvan was seated in a bigger cubicle already, wearing a headset and tapping her keyboard. Her ghost floated beside her in his purple shell.

"Hello, Kari!" she said. "That dinner last night was great."

Kari had quietly taken her a small dish of the chicken casserole while Jayesh had been out. Silvan had been overjoyed at the prospect of a home-cooked meal and had thanked her profusely.

"My leg's a lot better!" Silvan added as Kari sat down. "Look, all I have left is this one bandage. The doctors said that whoever healed me must have been crazy powerful in the Light. And I got to tell them it was Jayesh Khatri." This came out as a squeal.

Kari barely kept from rolling her eyes. "Keep it professional, Silvan. Dispatchers aren't allowed to fangirl over their teams." She nodded at a code of conduct taped to the cubicle wall.

"Oh, I know," Silvan replied. She motioned to her screen, which already displayed three different maps and satellite data. "I'm good at this. But the mission hasn't started yet, so I can still act normal. Looks like they're just arriving in Ganymede's orbit now."

Kari donned her headset and loaded the strike support programs. As she arranged her screen the way she wanted, footsteps approached the cubicle. Kari looked up to see Commander Zavala standing there, his unsmiling expression nearly as imposing as his gleaming parade armor. Kari hastily saluted. "Sir!"

Silvan saw her salute, turned to see Zavala, and saluted, too. "Commander!"

"At ease, Guardians," he replied. "Are you beginning the Ganymede mission?"

"In just a moment, sir," Silvan said. "They've entered orbit and haven't yet begun their approach."

"Excellent," Zavala replied. "Those boneyards contain Golden Age tech that our Cryptarchs have mined for decades. To lose them to the Fallen would be devastating to our technology industry. Pinpoint the areas of interest to the Fallen. Eliminate the scavengers. If necessary, destroy the equipment in question."

"Yes sir," Silvan and Kari replied.

Zavala made a note on his tablet screen and moved on to the next cubicle.

Silvan caught Kari's eye and mimed wiping sweat from her forehead. Kari mouthed, "I know, right?"

The three ships began their descent into the moon's gravity well, navigating in a long arc toward the region in question. Ganymede had begun as an icy moon, just one more frozen snowball orbiting Jupiter. But the tidal pressures from the gas giant heated Ganymede's core, warming a huge saltwater ocean that existed beneath the ice. When the Traveler arrived, it had stabilized the atmosphere, brought continents to the surface in the form of volcanoes, and let the warm oceans heat the moon into a jungle world.

Humans had been eager to participate in this terraforming. A team had seeded the young world with plants and animals. The Traveler had accepted these gifts and modified them. The jungles were now full of animals similar to earth species, but with some adaptive twists, like great lizards with gills, and panthers with six legs. The atmosphere was ludicrously high in oxygen, not quite enough to cause fires, but enough to give humans a delicious high when breathed too long.

As a result, colony ships had settled there. The high oxygen atmosphere cleared the mind and encouraged rapid thought, so Ganymede produced the craziest technology and experiments of humanity's entire Golden Age. Much of that tech had been preserved in the boneyards - huge underground caverns with stored vehicles, weapons, and machinery, the use of which had been forgotten.

The Fallen had so far overlooked Ganymede in their quest to plunder the solar system, but those days were over. The pirate aliens had discovered the boneyards, and if this advanced Golden Age tech fell into their hands, the aliens might have the means to exterminate humanity for good.

Fireteam Solarflare was to investigate the Fallen incursion and eliminate the threat. If the aliens were too deeply entrenched, they were to call for reinforcements. And the Guardians were to see what the Fallen were after - if they were looting indiscriminately, or deliberately seeking out certain pieces of tech.

Kari focused on her screen and flexed her wrists, ready to dig for information on the fly. Over their headsets came the voices of the fireteam.

"We've got a visual on our landing point," Jayesh reported. "Looks like an abandoned Air Force base. Lots of ruined jets and planes."

"Any sign of the Fallen?" Kari asked.

"Not yet," Jayesh replied. "Beginning transmat approach."

Each ship flew down and deposited its Guardian on the ground via transmat, then returned to orbit. They didn't dare land - Fallen scavengers liked nothing better than to cut up shiny Guardian jumpships.

"It's nice and warm, at least," Nell reported, arriving on the ground and getting her bearings. A video feed from her helmet opened on Kari and Silvan's screens. A moment later, they received two more from Jayesh and Grant-4, as well.

"You didn't want to go somewhere cold," Grant replied. "You got your wish. It's currently ninety-two degrees Fahrenheit out here."

"I think I'm going to melt," Jayesh said. "Where's the boneyard entrance?"

Silvan dropped a navigation marker on the map being transmitted to the team's helmet HUD. "North of your position, looks like an old tower."

The camera views swung around as the Guardians looked for it. They centered on what looked like a skyscraper with a huge satellite dish on top, now much overgrown with masses of hanging lichen. The things around it that resembled trees turned out to actually be some kind of tree-sized fungi, with puffballs instead of leaves on their branches.

"What is this, a mushroom biome?" Jayesh asked.

"So it would seem," Grant-4 replied. "Are there trees here?"

"I remember proper trees," Jayesh said, "but I was a lot further east, last time."

"You've been here before?" Silvan said with a dangerous hint of a squeal in her voice. "What did you see?"

"Hello, Silvan," said Jayesh warily. "We got hunted all over the ruins by this cat thing. It ambushed us on the rooftops, gave us a hell of a fight."

Kari elbowed Silvan. "Sensors indicate no large wildlife near your position, so it shouldn't be a problem this time."

Nell was saying, very softly, "Who is Silvan and why is she crushing on you?"

"Warlock," Jayesh hissed through his teeth, "and don't say crush, Kari's listening."

"It's not a crush-" Silvan began in a high voice.

Kari cut her off. "The entrance should be on your left. Look for a loading dock for trucks." She shot Silvan a look and nodded at the Code of Conduct. Silvan rolled her eyes and nodded.

The camera views moved around the base of the building until they found the old loading dock. A rusted metal door had once covered it, but it had been cut open and thrown aside. The sigil of a Fallen house had been scrawled across the inner wall in red paint.

"Uh-oh," Jayesh muttered, cautiously moving closer. "I've got a visual on a Fallen house mark. Please tell me that's not House of Devils."

"Unfortunately, yes," Kari said, recognizing it at once.

"How can that be?" Silvan broke in. "House of Devils disbanded after Twilight Gap, when their Kell was killed."

"Not quite," Kari replied. "They stuck together and wound up in the Russian plaguelands, augmenting themselves with SIVA. We destroyed thousands of them. What are they doing on Ganymede?"

"Go carefully, team," Jayesh warned.

Grant stepped into the loading dock's long passage, a dark tunnel angling downward. "I'll take point. Stay close."

The fireteam advanced down the tunnel. Just as it grew too dark to see, they detected the glow of lights in the distance - the brilliant blue glow-rods the aliens used for everything.

"I'm picking up hostiles," Grant's ghost, Sentry, announced. "Fifty or sixty of them. All clustered together."

"Probably still working on stealing stuff," Nell muttered. "We'll just have to crash their little party."

The ghost feeds appeared on Kari and Silvan's screens: two clusters of enemy targets, not moving much, obviously busy with something.

After a few more minutes, the team reached the end of the tunnel. It connected to a huge natural cavern, the ceiling and walls made of rippling flowstone. The floor had been paved with concrete, and the cave was full of machinery in orderly rows. A few were combat jets with the electronics long since stripped from the cockpits, skeletons waiting for their engineers to rebuild them. Others were strange-looking tanks, their weapons removed. But the aliens hadn't bothered with those. They were clustered around two different machines - things that appeared to be masses of tubes and wires, with seats somewhere inside.

"Looks like we get to destroy whatever they found," Jayesh said grimly. "Too bad. I don't even know what those things are."

"See if your ghosts can pull off a scan," Kari suggested. "After you clean out the Fallen."

The fireteam crept to the nearest tank, using it as cover. Then Grant lobbed a grenade into the midst of the aliens.

It detonated with a crack and boom. Aliens screamed and died, bodies cartwheeling. The rest turned on the Guardians in snarling rage. In a few seconds, the cave was the scene of a furious firefight. Kari watched, her heart pumping, fingers itching for her own weapons.

She watched Jayesh the closest, of course. He had drawn Rose, and was firing in short, precise bursts, providing cover for Nell and Grant. It wasn't easy to aim a pistol at medium range, as they tended to be close range weapons. But Jayesh steadied his arms on the tank's roof and picked off the aliens rushing at them, especially the ones moving to flank Nell and Grant.

And had that been a trick of the camera, or had that last shot flickered with Solar Light?

Strike protocol recommended that dispatch say little during firefights unless they had intelligence that was absolutely necessary. For one thing, it was so noisy, the team wouldn't hear them, anyway. For another, the team needed to concentrate. So Kari and Silvan waited in silence, watching the fight.

Kari glanced over the intel the ghosts were gathering on the Fallen - or Eliksni, which was their proper name. The aliens were humanoid with segmented, spider-like bodies - two legs, four arms, four eyes, and teeth like knives. They worshiped machines and had never forgotten that they had once had the Traveler - until it abandoned them for Earth. They lived in a rigid caste system. The lowest caste had two arms docked and were called dregs. Funny, there were no dregs in this fight - all were members of the upper castes, with four arms and quality armor.

Silvan muted her mic. "What is this machine they're fighting over?"

Kari muted hers, too. "I can't tell. It looks like ... farm equipment? That thing on the front looks like a harvester."

"But look at all the tubes. They look like they still have fluid in them."

This raised a red flag in the back of Kari's mind. "Neko, please bring up what we know about the origins of SIVA."

"You don't think," Neko muttered. "Working."

"Ganymede was the home of the Golden Age mad scientists," Silvan mused. "If that stuff is SIVA, that would be bad."

SIVA, or Synthetic Intelligent Viral Agent, was nanotechnology engineered to create objects for colonists on the fly. It could build a suit around a person, raise a building, construct a vehicle, or any number of other things. But the majority of it, stored in Site 6 on Earth, had been given the command consume, enhance, replicate. This turned the nanotech into a viral, rampaging horror that built constructs for its own use, commandeered bodies of humans or aliens, and in general tried to devour the planet. The Vanguard had quarantined large portions of Russia to keep the SIVA contained, and the very word still gave Guardians the creeps.

"I found data," Neko announced. "But you're not going to like it." A window opened on Kari's screen with an old data mined document from some salvaged memory chip.

Ongoing projects at Ganymede: boneyard 98:

SIVA refinements

minor terraforming equipment

transmat state

quantum tunneling

Light transference

Applied Light uses

weapons RnD

Silvan leaned over to read this list. "Um. I don't like the sound of any of those."

Kari flipped her mic on. "Jayesh, don't rupture those hoses. That might be SIVA."

"Too late," Jayesh replied, tilting his helmet. Clear liquid drizzled out of the bottom of the machine, creating puddles on the floor. The aliens had tracked it everywhere, and many dead ones lay in it, their blue ether bleeding into the liquid.

"Traveler's crack," Kari swore under her breath.

"Stay out of the-" Jayesh began.

Nell slid straight through it on her backside, knives whirling as she hamstringed aliens on her way by. The liquid must have been slimy, because she traveled a good twenty feet without slowing down. She whipped to her feet with a huge smear up the back of her armor, laughing. "What'd you say?"

Aliens staggered about, cursing and trying to bring their weapons to bear. The Guardians put them down. The rest of the aliens bolted and vanished up another access tunnel.

"I said that goo might be SIVA," Jayesh repeated, once it was quiet enough to hear each other.

"Dude, that's not SIVA," Nell said, dipping the toe of her boot in the goo, then wiping it off. "SIVA's red and makes those gross fiber bundles, like raw muscle. This is just hydraulic fluid or something."

Grant-4 approached the machine and produced his ghost, who flew around and examined it. Nell and Jayesh did, too. The information from the ghosts arrived and began scrolling across Kari and Silvan's screens.

Kari's hands went cold. The fluid was almost nothing but nanites, and the profile matched that of SIVA. However, this was a different version number.

Silvan was reading a different batch of data. "Looks like that machine was some kind of seeder. The fluid would go on those spinning bars in the front, then get plastered all over leaves and things."

"It's SIVA!" Kari exclaimed. "A different strain. Why would they build a machine to spread it over a wide area?"

"Terraforming?" Jayesh suggested.

Grant's view swung over to examine Nell, anxiously. He pulled her cloak aside and looked at her back. The slime had eaten pits and grooves into her pants and chest plate, as well as some of the sealed suit beneath. "Nell, the nanites are burning through your gear."

"What?" Nell jumped up and spun around, trying to see her own back. Then she checked her boots. Layers of material had been chewed out of those, too.

"It's eating me!" she shrieked, clawing at her armor. "What do I do?"

"Get it off!" Kari exclaimed. "Have her ghost transmat it!"

"No!" Nell shouted. "Hadrian isn't taking these nanites inside him. You guys, help me!"

Jayesh and Grant began frantically undoing buckles and clasps, taking off Nell's chest plate and armor. She ripped off each item and threw it. Finally she stood there in socks and her thermal undersuit, panting. "Hadrian, scan me. Make sure I'm clean."

Her ghost scanned her from head to foot, flying around and around her in a worried way. "You appear clean, Nell. But the nanite fluid has splashed everywhere. It's not safe for anyone to be here right now." He flashed his beam at the concrete, which already had little craters worn in it. Then he transmatted a fresh suit of armor onto Nell - older armor, dirty and dented, but it was better than nothing.

As Kari watched this on her screen, chewing her lip, Silvan nudged her. "Did you call for backup?"

"What? No." Kari glanced at her various data windows. "Is another team inbound?"

"Just one ship," Silvan said. "It doesn't match anything in the database, but it sort of resembles a jumpship. It's gold."

Kari's heart leaped into her throat, then plunged into her stomach. She leaned over to look at Silvan's screen. "Where?"

Silvan pointed to tracking data being gathered by the jumpships in orbit. A fourth ship had begun its landing approach a few minutes earlier. They had a clear shot of it gleaming like a golden splinter against Ganymede's blue-gray background.

Kari returned to her own screen, trying not to panic. Keep it professional. Even tone. Don't frighten the fireteam.

"Guys," she said, "rogue Guardian incoming. Jayesh and I have dealt with her before. I have no idea what she wants, but look out."

"Gold ship?" Jayesh asked.

"Gold ship," Kari confirmed.

"Oh," Nell said scornfully. "Her."

Chapter Text

"You know this Guardian?" Grant inquired. He was cautiously examining Nell's discarded gear, which was disintegrating faster and faster.

"Her name is Mako Cadenza," Nell said. "They were talking about her in the Hunter lounge the other day. Sold herself to Calus, trying to be his Shadow of Earth. Utterly ruthless. Her friends are all sad about it, but they told me that if I ever see her, to put her down."

"Great," Jayesh muttered. "Why would she be coming here?"

"She wants strong weapons," Nell replied, her view swinging from exit to exit, watching them. "She's combing the solar system for lost Golden Age tech. Anything to give her an edge over the rest of us plebs."

"Thorn," Kari whispered.

Jayesh's view dropped to Rose in his hand. Neither of them dared mention it on a live feed, but now they understood why Mako Cadenza had hunted them. Thorn had certainly been powerful - and useful against Guardians.

Silvan switched off her mic. Kari did the same. Silvan whispered, "I think we should scrap the mission. Tell them to blow the whole cave and get out of there."

"Surely they can handle one Guardian!" Kari whispered back. "It's three against one!"

"Look," Silvan whispered. "I just pulled up Mako Cadenza's records. She's old. Dark Ages old. She's listed as multiclass because she uses Light any way she likes. Last time she played the Crucible, years ago, she went on a fifty-kill streak that's never been topped. I say get the team out while there's still a chance."

"You don't think Jayesh can handle it?" Kari replied, half-mocking.

Silvan bit her lip and looked at her screen. "He's a healer, Kari. I saw his Crucible scores. Unless Grant and Nell can carry him ..."

This honest assessment from the fangirl worried Kari more than if Silvan had blindly insisted that Jayesh would be fine. And Kari knew Jayesh's reluctance to kill other Guardians. Sometimes his gentle nature worked against him.

She flipped her mic back on. "We're going to have to scrap the mission, team. Blow the cave and get out."

"Because of one intruder?" Grant replied. "She may not even come to this area. It's a big moon."

"She's likely after the tech in that cave. The Fallen have already compromised it, and we have orders to destroy anything they've discovered."

Jayesh's viewscreen panned around the cave. "Dispatch, this place is huge. Did anyone pack explosives? I sure didn't."

"As a matter of fact," said Grant, his orange eyes winking as he smiled. "My ghost is carrying three pounds of plastic explosives in her memory. I anticipated this possibility."

Jayesh gave Grant a high five. "Get to work, then. Nell and I will keep watch."

Nell gaped after Grant as his ghost transmatted the explosives into his hands. "You brought explosives? And you know how to use them?"

"I've been taking those extra courses," Grant said, kneeling beside the dripping SIVA spreader. "I told you I was training in demolition."

"I thought you meant you were taking buildings apart," Nell exclaimed. "Can I take demolition courses?"

"Yes," Grant said. "But for now, cover me."

Nell backed up into the shadows near the wall and faded into them, using her Nightstalker abilities to cloak herself with Void Light. This left Jayesh standing alone, an obvious target, gripping Rose in both hands.

Grant remarked, "Did anybody look at this other SIVA machine over here?"

"Didn't have a chance," Jayesh replied. "Why?"

"I think it's some kind of augment station ... there's all these instructions on the side for sticking your arm in this slot ..."

At that point, Kari and Silvan both saw movement on their overhead maps. "Incoming!" Silvan exclaimed.

"Left hand passage," Kari said.

Jayesh swung toward it, lifting Rose. The light within the passage was shifting as someone walked down it. A moment later, Mako Cadenza stepped into the room.

She still wore her hunter's cloak with the glittering purple gems on the shoulders. But this time it was thrown back, showing her black and gold armor - every inch of it edged in gold leaf, glittering with more gems. Her helmet was an inhuman mask, a mere T-shape where eyes and a nose ought to be.

Cadenza saw Jayesh covering her and halted. She gripped her own rifle in both hands, but didn't raise it. "Well," she said in a clear, ringing voice. "You again. Why is it always you, Khatri?"

"What do you want?" Jayesh said, his weapon steady.

Cadenza nodded at the machines. "I want to spend a little time with those. The Fallen chatter about them has been intriguing, and I have a commission to fill."

Kari glanced at Silvan. "Fallen chatter?" she mouthed.

Silvan shrugged.

Jayesh replied, "We have orders to destroy this whole cave. Nobody is allowed to touch this tech."

"Right," Cadenza said impatiently. She whipped her rifle to her shoulder and fired.

Jayesh squeezed Rose's trigger. But Rose misfired with a metallic bang and a spray of sparks. Cadenza shot Jayesh twice in the center of mass. The breath whistled out of him. An alert appeared on Kari and Silvan's screens that his condition had gone critical. He dropped to the ground.

Kari leaped to her feet with a curse that turned every head in the strike center. Silvan grabbed her arm and tugged her back into her chair. "Protocol, Kari, protocol!"

Kari crouched in her chair, Arc Light snapping through her veins and making her hair stand on end with static. "I'm gonna kill her, that bitch-"

Silvan switched off Kari's microphone. She said into her own, "Do not let the rogue Guardian near the machines!"

Nell sprang out of hiding in silence and ambushed Cadenza from behind. But Cadenza spun around and blocked Nell's void blades with a pair of her own. For a second, the camera view was nothing but a purple blur, the combatants moving too fast for the camera to register. Then Nell spun to the floor, holding her side and gasping. Cadenza's blades had gone home.

Now two of the three camera views showed close-ups of the floor. Only Grant was still standing.

The rogue Guardian moved toward Grant's position.

"I can't let you take these devices," Grant said, circling, keeping the bulk of the machines between him and his enemy. "They're full of SIVA."

"I know," said Cadenza. "A different strain than Site Six. It's why I'm interested. Ah. I see. This is the augment chamber."

Grant summoned a glowing grenade in one hand. "I've already rigged it with explosives. Touch it, and I'll throw this grenade. The whole cave will come down."

"And bury your team and their ghosts," Cadenza replied. "You wouldn't dare risk it."

Grant's camera view shifted to the Light grenade. Slowly he let it go out and clenched his hand into a fist. He looked anxiously toward where Nell and Jayesh lay on the cavern floor. Jayesh didn't move, but Nell was sitting up, gesturing for Grant to stay under cover. Her ghost hid behind her, healing her with stealthy pulses of Light. Jayesh's ghost appeared, too, staying low.

Grant crept back around the SIVA spreader, trying to spot Cadenza. Her blip on his HUD was standing at the augment machine. He couldn't quite edge far enough around to see what she was doing.

"I could take you down with one punch," Grant said, trying to distract her.

"I'm standing in front of your explosives," she said, her voice gone oddly hoarse. "Any attack and I'll hit them with Solar Light. Boom, no more fireteam." When Grant made no move to attack, she went on, "Guardians are like that. Form attachments to their teams. Don't want to see them hurt, even when it doesn't make sense to let them live. Your team - uh - your team is alive, but you should - should - be trying to stop me. You know what SIVA is supposed to do?" She broke off in a long gasp, as if trying not to scream.

Grant peered around the spreader. Cadenza had pulled off her left glove and rolled up the sleeve of her suit. She had thrust her hand into the augment device's slot up to the elbow. Her other hand gripped the machine's frame as if bracing herself against extreme pain.

"What are you doing?" Grant exclaimed, aghast.

Cadenza laughed - a forced laugh through clenched teeth. "I have a commission to fill. Shadow of Earth. That means I'm humanity's top assassin. My weapons and Light have to outclass all other Guardians if the Emperor is to grant me the commission. So I'm ... augmenting myself." The last few words came out as a gasp.

Silvan and Kari listened to this in growing horror, Silvan with both hands over her mouth.

"What do we do?" Kari whispered.

Silvan shook her head. "They'll have to kill her. She's infecting herself with SIVA. It's all I can think to do."

But before she could flip her mic on, Cadenza pulled her arm out of the device with a cry. From the elbow down, her arm had been replaced by a strange-looking weapon. Metal cords had been woven into her flesh and bone. Her hand had been replaced by a short, broad gun barrel. It looked like a fusion cannon, with the bulky power pack fused directly into the back of her arm. Blood still trickled from the end, but all wounds had been sealed closed.

Grant made a wordless, horrified sound.

Cadenza lifted her new weapon and turned it this way and that, the helmet concealing her expression. Then she lifted it, aimed at the far wall, and fired.

An orb of Void Light, like a mini version of a warlock's Nova Bomb, exploded out of the weapon. It shot across the cave and exploded against the far wall with a flash and boom. Cracks opened in the wall and ceiling. Rocks and dust pelted down, filling the far end of the cavern.

"Well, this is satisfactory," Cadenza said. "I'll just be leaving now." She darted away from the machines. But she paused beside Jayesh, who was just climbing to his feet. "Ah, that's what you did to Thorn. What a waste." She made a disgusted sound and took off up the exit passage.

"That's our cue to leave," Nell exclaimed, supporting Jayesh's arm. "Grant, come on!"

Grant was staring at the remains of Nell's armor, as well as the bodies of the aliens that had touched the nanites. All of them were being rapidly broken down into brown goo, the nanites reforming them into ... something. After a second, he tore his gaze away and followed his team toward the surface.

Kari became aware of someone standing behind her. She tore her eyes from her screen to see Commander Zavala standing there like a statue in silence, observing. He gestured for her to mute her mic. Kari hastily obeyed.

"Kari Khatri," he addressed her. "I know it is upsetting to see your husband and teammate hurt. But he is a Guardian. You both know the risks. Your behavior just now was unprofessional."

Kari gulped. "Uh, yes sir. It won't happen again."

Zavala acknowledged this with a nod. "Even so, I am relieving you of the rest of this mission. Silvan Nerisis is fully capable of managing the rest alone. Go clear your head."

Humiliation flamed through Kari, heating her face until she thought she might catch fire. Unable to look at Silvan, she pulled off her headset and shut down her computer. Then she left in silence, head down, so she wouldn't have to see the curious stares of the other dispatchers.

Dismissed for unprofessional behavior! Jayesh had gone down because stupid Rose had misfired. Mako Cadenza had augmented herself with a SIVA weapon and got away. Kari's head whirled with these thoughts. She couldn't face the children like this. So she made her way down the Tower walk to where the rest of the wall began, and broke into a run.

She ran for three miles along the top of the wall, the fresh autumn wind in her face. It felt good to burn off her adrenaline, run away from Zavala and Silvan and her own failure to control herself.

She stopped for breath and sat on the wall's parapet, legs hanging over the seventy-story drop, and gazed out at the fields beyond the walls to the mountains in the distance. Neko appeared beside her.

"Don't tell me I was unprofessional," she snapped at him. "I know."

"I wasn't going to say anything," Neko said gently. "Jayesh was hurt, and he shouldn't have been. His weapon let him down."

"I know." Kari clawed her hair out of her face. "Blasted experimental gun. Now we have a SIVA-augmented rogue Guardian running around. What did that gun even fire? It wasn't bullets."

"Light," Neko said unhappily. "I'm pretty sure the SIVA tapped directly into her Light as a power source. Nasty stuff. She'll win any fight, now. I recommend sniping her at long range."

Kari made a wordless sound of horrified disgust. She sat there in silence for a moment, gazing at the landscape. "Do you think Silvan will flirt with Jayesh?"

"I doubt it," Neko said. "I mean, not during the mission. I have no doubt she'd try it elsewhere."

"I'll have to talk to her about it," Kari muttered. "It's inappropriate. He's married."

Neko studied her face, his blue eye flicking to and fro. He made a small sound like a sigh. "You know, you loved Rem so much. But this thing you have for Jayesh is even deeper."

"You think so?" Kari raised an eyebrow. Neko didn't usually discuss these things.

The ghost nodded. "On one hand, I see how losing Rem has affected you. You've wrapped all that grief into loving Jayesh, and it's like steel cables inside you. On the other hand, it makes you irrational. Especially when he's in danger. Or hurt."

Kari nodded. Her ghost knew her better than she knew herself, because of the neural symbiosis. She forced a smile. "So ... that makes me bad at dispatching his missions."

"Probably." Neko turned to gaze across the landscape. "But that's not such a bad thing. You'll just have to learn to control yourself when he takes a hit."

She swallowed. After the things Jayesh had been through, seeing him hurt sent her into berserk mode. Could she control that part of herself? She must learn. What happened, down the line, when Connor and Stephanie grew up and walked into dangerous situations? She couldn't live in panic mode.

"Oh Traveler," she whispered. "I love too much, and it's made me crazy. Please grant me peace. Help me let things go."

She pulled in her feet and turned the other way, so she could see the Traveler's cracked globe floating above the City. She exhaled and inhaled slowly, seeking that meditative state where she sensed her Light.

Neko turned, too, sensing what she was doing. He floated beside her, gazing thoughtfully at the Traveler.

After a long moment, Kari felt her Light quicken. Electricity tingled in her palms. With it came a whisper of her name, a gentle acknowledgement of her plea. Words came, gently impressed upon her soul.

We shall educate each other.

Peace stole through her - a deep, abiding calm. It was as if a friend had given her a hug to show that they understood. At the same time, wonder filled her.

"Neko," she whispered, "the Traveler studies the universe through ghosts and Guardians, right?"

"Right," he replied.

"So ... has it been studying love through me?"

Neko blinked. "I suppose ... yes, probably. Goodness, what a thought."

Kari sat there, half-meditating, basking in the calm that radiated from the Light. She was educating the Traveler. At first, she was elated. Then she thought of all the times she had let Jayesh down, or been short with the children, or lost her temper, or had days when she was too tired to even cook meals. Some example she was. If the Traveler was studying her, it must know what a disappointment humans were. She hunched her shoulders and turned her back on it.

The brief peace oozed away, replaced by thoughts about the mission. Had they blown the cave? What had the SIVA been constructing? Would it eventually devour Ganymede? Jayesh hadn't gotten any on him, had he? What would Mako Cadenza do now that she had been augmented?

And Rose had misfired, the piece of trash. She hoped Jayesh scrapped it. If he hadn't died from being shot, then he'd been awfully close to it, and all because of his stupid gun.

Fretful and growing upset again, she got up and ran back along the wall, fists pumping.

"What do I do, Neko?" she thought. "I have no way of knowing anything else about the mission until it's over. But I'm scared to death."

"I am, too," he said in her head, very softly. "You think I don't like Jayesh, but I do. He's been so good to you. And I can't stand these pictures in your mind, of him eaten by SIVA. Please stop."

Kari tried to stop thinking about that. But her treacherous mind only replaced it with an image of Jayesh looking deeply disappointed and saying, "Zavala kicked you off dispatch? How bad did you screw up this time?"

"Oh Light," Neko whispered. "He'd never say that. Let's just go home. The children will be glad to have you back."

They'd be an excellent distraction, actually. Seeing as this Ganymede mission had been supposed to last several days, Kari decided to distract herself completely. "Let's see if Naomi and Charles will let Reuben have a sleepover."

She felt Neko's sudden glow of a smile. "That'll do the trick."

Chapter Text

Connor, Stephanie, and their friend Reuben had a truly excellent two days. First came the surprise announcement that Reuben was invited to a sleepover. When he arrived at their apartment with a pillow, sleeping bag, and backpack, Connor and Stephanie were beyond excited. They had only had a sleepover once before.

Kari took them down to the City to eat pizza - an unheard-of treat - and play what Connor called big video games. The kind where you had to stand up to reach the controls on the arcade cabinet. Kari smiled and joked, keeping them all laughing. When it was time for bed, Neko and Connor's ghost, Varan, took turns putting on Light displays against the ceiling of Connor and Stephanie's bedroom.

When they woke up the next morning, Kari had gotten up early and fried fresh donuts. When the children had stuffed themselves, Kari challenged them to video games until they couldn't sit still. Then she took them to their favorite playground in the City Lake District, the one with the really good swings and climbing bars.

"Your mom is way more fun than my mom," Reuben remarked to Connor as they climbed. "My mom only makes donuts on the Dawning. And Dad's ghost doesn't play with me."

"Neko's usually a jerk," Connor agreed. "But Mom yelled at him, so he's been a lot nicer. Mom's not usually this fun. It must be because Dad's not home."

"Next time your Dad goes to work, let's do another sleepover!" Reuben exclaimed, hanging upside down.

Connor glanced at his mother, who was sitting in a swing with Stephanie in her lap, pretending to swing really high. "I'll ask when we get home."

None of the children saw the quiet anguish behind Kari's smile, or how she used a string of jokes as a mask. Two days had passed without a word from Jayesh or Silvan. Of course, as dispatch, Silvan wasn't allowed to talk about missions until the final report appeared on the Vanguard servers. But Jayesh usually had his ghost send a message home when he was gone for longer than a day or two. And there had been none.

This told Kari a few things. First, the mission must have heated up so much that he simply couldn't write home. They might be battling Cadenza, or more Fallen had showed up, or - and this one haunted her the worst - the SIVA had contaminated them.

But the other possibility was just as bad. And that was that the team had heard Zavala kick her off dispatch, and Jayesh was too disgusted to want to talk to her.

Kari threw herself into entertaining the children as a way to run from these fears.

"We're swinging so high!" Kari said, one arm around Stephanie in her lap.

The two-year-old clung to the swing's chains for dear life, as if they were miles from the ground. "Not so high, Mommy!" she begged. "I don't have a ghost to save me when I die!"

"You won't die," Kari laughed. "I've got you. You're safe."

"I want down," Stephanie announced.

Kari let her slide to the sand and watched her run to the play equipment. Kari moved to one of the shaded benches where parents sat to observe their offspring. Stephanie climbed to the top of the smallest slide and slid down it over and over. Connor and Reuben had conquered the climbing bars, where they sat talking and swinging their feet. Other children ran and played, but the other parents kept their distance from Kari. They had seen Neko hanging around her earlier, and nothing so intimidated people as a Guardian who was also a parent.

So Kari sat alone, watching the children play and trying not to worry, meaning she worried a lot. After she'd fretted about Jayesh and the mission for a while, her thoughts turned to the treacherous gun, Rose.

"Neko," she thought, "do you think Jay might have misapplied the Lightweave to Rose?"

"Maybe," Neko replied. "Balancing a weapon like that is tricky, sometimes. I did notice that the bullets were picking up some of Jayesh's Light during the fight with the aliens."

"I thought I saw that, too," Kari thought. "Maybe the Light overheated the workings? Jammed the cylinder?"

"I've heard of Light interacting with weapons in all kinds of ways," Neko said doubtfully. "But it doesn't jam them. That's usually a mechanical failure somewhere."

Kari sighed and spread both arms along the bench's back rest, since nobody wanted to sit near her, anyway. "I wonder if I could get anywhere tinkering with it. I've modded hand cannons before. Remember my old Exile Reliant?"

"It was more mod than gun," Neko replied. "It always made me nervous."

"But it was fun," Kari said. "Point is, I think I ought to give Rose a look. Run it through Crucible, maybe. Jay could watch the kids for an afternoon."

"If it responds to your Light," Neko replied. "He's been at tuning it to his Light, and he's a Sunsinger, not a Stormcaller. Arc and Solar are very different."

Kari thought about this, her lip between her teeth. "It's worth a shot. I mean, if it wants to be a solar weapon, then fine, whatever. But it's broken in some way. And Jay's not running around with a broken weapon."

Neko was silent a moment. Then he made a sound like a sigh. "This is one reason I love you. You're always looking out for other people like this."

Kari didn't reply. She watched Connor fling himself down the climbing bars, reckless, fearless, so much like herself. Then she watched Stephanie climbing the ladder to the slide, placing each hand and foot just so, always careful and thoughtful, so much like her daddy. Her heart swelled suddenly, watching them. How in the world could she raise these remarkable small people into functioning adults? She felt like the future was a gray haze she couldn't see into.

As long as Jayesh came home safe ... and he didn't despise her. Those two miserable thoughts made her want to crawl into a hole and die. Surely everything would be fine. She'd look at Rose and fix whatever was wrong. It would be fine.

She took the children home an hour later, dropping a tired Reuben off at his apartment. She fed Connor and Stephanie a snack, then they curled up on the sofa to watch a kids' movie until dinner time.

"Any word from Jay?" she thought to Neko.

"No," he replied. "It'll probably be another day."

Kari sighed. They did their evening routine, then both Connor and Stephanie went to bed early. Kari roamed around the apartment, lonely and restless, avoiding bed, which seemed like a great, cold void without Jayesh. Then she pulled out her model colony ship and worked on it until past midnight.

They all slept late the next morning. Kari was awakened by the sound of video games. She emerged from her room to find that Connor had helped himself and Stephanie to slices of bread, which they were eating in front of the TV.

"Just plain bread, huh?" Kari said.

Connor gave her an angelic look. "You said not to use knives, and I couldn't reach the peanut butter."

Stephanie held out her half-eaten slice. "Can you turn this into toast?"

Kari was in the middle of breakfast preparation when Neko said, "Ping from Phoenix. Jayesh and his team are on their way. They'll be here this afternoon."

Kari felt like a painful bubble of tension within her popped, leaving her limp with relief. She sagged against the counter a moment, bowing her head, silently thanking the Traveler. After a moment, she went on with breakfast. "They're all safe?"

Neko responded to Phoenix's ping. "All safe," he reported. "They've been hunting and destroying SIVA machines for two solid days. They're worn out. Jayesh says he wants to take a shower for at least six hours."

Kari smiled. He didn't sound mad or disgusted, not if his biggest worry was a shower. They hadn't communicated because the mission had run them ragged. Her worries had been groundless.

But still, even though she was pretty sure everything was fine, Kari still worried a little. Jayesh had to notice that she'd disappeared from dispatch. Had he thought she'd abandoned him? Or had Zavala's reprimand picked up on the mic?

Either way, these thoughts nagged at her. She kept herself busy cleaning the apartment and grocery shopping so Jayesh's favorite snacks would be fully stocked. Connor and Stephanie were delighted that Daddy would soon be home.

Finally, late that afternoon, the door opened and Jayesh walked in, dark circles under his eyes, his hair mashed flat from his helmet, his robe half-unbuckled. Kari met him at the door. He immediately pulled her into his arms and kissed her for a long time.

"Tired?" she whispered, nuzzling his unshaven cheek.

"Tired," he replied. "Dead. Zombie. Point me at the shower."

He wearily hugged Connor and Stephanie, too, then made a beeline for the bathroom. His ghost, Phoenix, stayed behind. His red and yellow shell was splattered with sticky black gunk. His eye was clean, but that was all Jayesh had been able to do for him. He gave Kari a mournful look. "Could you wash me off?"

Kari scrubbed the ghost in the sink with a brush. "What is this stuff? It barely comes off."

"It's sap from some kind of mushroom tree," Phoenix replied, his eye tightly shut. "Jayesh was hiding behind one during a firefight. I came out to heal him just as the Fallen threw a grenade and we both got splattered."

"You could have been dead," Kari chided.

"It wasn't that close," Phoenix replied. "All we've done is fight House of Devils for those stupid boneyards. We finally started hunting their ships and drove them off that way. But there's no more SIVA. We buried those places deep."

"Good." Kari was so glad to hear anything about the mission that as soon as Phoenix was clean, she kissed his eye.

He blinked and shifted his shell. "Ack. Kiss Jayesh, not me."

She laughed and let him go. He immediately opened his shell and spun his segments around to dry them.

True to his word, Jayesh stayed in the shower the rest of the evening. Kari put the children to bed, then knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah," came the response. "Be out soon."

A few minutes later, Jayesh emerged, clad in a bathrobe and drying his hair. "Sorry," he said. "I had this sticky black stuff all over me and it wouldn't come off."

"I scrubbed that junk off Phoenix," Kari said. "He's all clean now."

Phoenix appeared and twirled in midair, showing off his clean shell.

Jayesh grinned and butted his forehead gently against the ghost. "Sorry about the mess, little light."

"No harm done," Phoenix replied. "It wasn't SIVA."

Jayesh went to the closet and pulled out his guitar case. He took his guitar to the chair in the corner, relaxed into it with a sigh, propped his feet on the bed, and began to play a few chords.

Kari smoothed back his hair and kissed his forehead, then sat on the floor beside the chair. "Ready for some music, huh?"

"Ready for anything but Ganymede," Jayesh replied. "What happened to you? You just up and left in the middle of the mission."

"Remember when Cadenza shot you?" Kari said. "I may have ... cursed really loudly. Zavala noticed."

Jayesh winced.

Kari shrugged and nodded. "So I was out of there. Did Silvan mind her manners?"

"Pretty much," Jayesh said, playing a chord progression he'd been practicing. It was a comforting, familiar sound. "She tried to contain her squealing whenever I used my supercharge, but I heard it. By the time we got done, Nell and Grant were teasing me something awful. Mostly hand gestures and posing. But when we got back to the ships and Silvan wasn't listening, Nell started calling me, "Jayesh Khatri," in that same squeal. I told her I'd Sunsinger her if she did it again."

Kari was laughing. It was too easy to imagine their team hassling Jayesh that way.

"I wrote up my report on the flight home," Jayesh continued. "Filed it as we landed. The Vanguard can do without me for a few days. We did nothing but fight Fallen and travel around Ganymede for twenty-one hours. We were so tired, we kept taking off our helmets to breathe the high-oxygen air for an energy boost."

"Did it work?" Kari asked.

Jayesh shrugged. "You feel great for a while. Then your body remembers how tired it is. Fair warning. I'm planning to sleep for the next two days."

"Sleep all you want, heartspark," Kari said, leaning against the chair. "I'm just glad you're home. And you're not mad at me."

He blinked at her. "Mad at you? For what?"

"Getting kicked off dispatch."

He laughed a little. "We didn't know what happened to you. I thought you got called away to deal with the kids or something."

"Nope." Kari sighed. "I blame Rose."

"Rose behaved itself after that," Jayesh said. "No idea why it jammed. It conducted my Light pretty good for a while, by the end of the mission. Fiery bullets and such."

"Sticking to the whole defense and support thing with it?" Kari asked.

Jayesh shrugged. "That's the idea. It's coming along. We'll take a look at it tomorrow." He leaned his head against the back of the chair and strummed another handful of chords. "I actually ... wanted to show you something."

"What?" Kari said, straightening.

"Well," Jayesh said, sitting up in the chair, "we worked really hard. And all that oxygen made my brain work different. And ... long story short, I wrote a song for you."

"You did?" Kari beamed.

Jayesh smiled shyly and looked down. "It's not super good. I've been playing the chords through just now to see if they sound like they did in my head. Would you like to hear it?"

"Yes, please!"

Jayesh cleared his throat, hesitated, then began to play and sing.

It was a song about how she was his star to guide him home, and how sometimes the clouds came and he lost sight of it. But the star was always there, despite the storms.

By the end, Kari was so choked up, she couldn't say a word. So she kissed him, instead. She had spent so much time worrying that he would be disappointed in her, or despise her. And all along, he had been writing a song for her.

"You like it?" he said, giving her a pleading look, the way the children did when presenting her with a drawing.

"I love it," she whispered. "Can you ... can you sing it again?"

Pleased, Jayesh played it again, singing with more confidence this time. Kari listened raptly, learning the words so she could sing along. The third time he played it, she haltingly sang with him. It was like working magic, but with sound. Both their ghosts floated nearby, listening in pleasure and wonder.

"I'm glad you like it," Jayesh said at last, setting his guitar back in its case. "I worked on it with Phoenix all the way home. He's developing quite the musical talent."

"He's picking it up from you," Kari said. "I'd noticed he seemed more musical lately."

Jayesh held out his arms with another of those shy, earnest looks she couldn't resist. "Sit with me?"

She slid into his lap and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in his thick, soft hair. His arms encircled her waist, and he burrowed his face against her chest. She felt him sigh and relax.

She stroked his face with her cheek against his hair. For some reason, all she could think of was that camera view of Cadenza as she shot him, just to get him out of her way. Kari's hand dropped to his chest. "Did Cadenza shoot you here?"

He guided her hand to just below his ribcage. "Here. Armor piercing rounds that went right through my suit."

Kari rubbed the place, now perfectly healed. "I hate seeing you hurt."

His arms tightened around her a little. "I know. It shouldn't have happened."

"I'm going to fix Rose," she told him. "I've modded weapons before. If you watch the kids for an afternoon, I'll test it in Crucible."

He tilted his head back to meet her gaze, the blue Light shimmering in his eyes. "Now it's my turn to hate seeing you hurt."

"It doesn't bother me, so much," Kari replied, kissing his forehead. "Besides, I'm good at Crucible. And I want to see if that damn gun behaves itself. It shouldn't have misfired. There's nothing wrong with it."

"Mm." Jayesh leaned his head against her again, one hand rubbing the small of her back. "I won't stop you, lovelight. But I can't watch. I'll get too angry."

She kissed down the side of his neck. "I guess that's a berserk button for both of us."

He lifted his lips to hers. "I care about you too much."

She kissed him, slowly and deeply, letting the stress of the past few days drain away. He was here now, in her arms, and he still loved her. Nothing else mattered.

She would care about things in the morning. But tonight, she put all caring aside and rejoiced in the moment - those perfect moments alone with her husband.

Chapter Text

The Tower mod shop was mostly empty the next day. Kari hummed Jayesh's song to herself as she laid Rose on a workbench. She secured a toolbox, rooted through it for a screwdriver, and went to work taking the pistol apart.

In her head, Neko conveyed Jayesh's voice. "Check the Lightweave, while you're at it. It was working loose toward the end, I thought."

"I will." Kari prodded the wires fused into the frame. One spot on the grip had cracked its weld and was slowly peeling away from the frame. She'd fix that soon enough.

"Did you use any spirit bloom?" she asked.

"No," Jayesh replied. "I wasn't sure how. It's just this sparkly dust."

"You have to heat it," Kari said. "I was actually thinking of mixing that with some spin metal and phase glass. There's a formula here for energy-conducting metal. I was thinking of covering the gun in it."

"Like rose petals?" Jayesh said.

That gave Kari an idea. She grabbed a sheet of grid paper and a pencil and began to draw the outline of a pistol. She added long, petal-like strips of metal around the grip and down the barrel. She had Neko scan it and send it to Phoenix.

A moment later, Jayesh replied, "Oh, I see what you're doing. Like the way Thorn had a sheath of bone. Only this is ... flowery Light metal."

"That's the idea. Do you like the design?"

Jayesh suggested a few changes. Kari drew another design, then another. Once she was satisfied, she returned to pulling Rose apart. "No point making it fancy if the base weapon is unsound."

"Let me know what you find," Jayesh replied. "The kids are begging for Light construct story time."

Kari smiled. Jayesh had spent a couple of summers doing stand-up comedy in front of City crowds, creating constructs made of Light to illustrate his stories and jokes. He still made them to amuse his fireteam, and Connor and Stephanie loved it.

Kari cheerfully laid Rose's parts on the workbench and cleaned each one. She also had Neko inspect everything, measuring precisely to see if any part had warped out of true.

"They're all within acceptable ranges," Neko said after scanning for several minutes. "I'm talking nanometers, here. There is no reason this gun should have ever jammed. It's not even dirty."

"So strange," Kari said, reassembling it with care. "I'll try it on the firing range. Make sure everything works."

Rose performed flawlessly on the firing range, once Kari readjusted to how to hold a hand cannon without the kick hurting her. She emptied the cylinder again and again, making a nice ring of bullet holes in the center of each paper target. Sometimes she could persuade the gun to pick up her Light and fire a bullet trailing blue sparks. But this wasn't often. Jayesh had already poured fire through it, and the weapon's materials responded to fire.

So Kari took Rose to the Crucible.

The Crucible was both a training ground for Guardians, and the City's most popular sport. Teams would fight in various arenas to accomplish objectives, capture points, or simply be the last Guardian standing. Due to being able to die and resurrect, live fire was used, and Guardian-triggered deaths were permitted. Ghosts were heavily protected and off-limits to attack.

Jayesh didn't like playing in the Crucible because he hated dying. But Kari had a higher pain tolerance and didn't mind it.

Kari joined a team of three others and showed them her hand cannon, explaining about testing mods. Her teammates grew enthusiastic, showing off their own weapon mods and what they did. Compared to Rose, their weapons were souped-up hot rods that did crazy things like steal bullets from other guns, charge a Guardian's Light, or empower a Guardian to reload extremely fast. Some of them wore gloves with copper contacts to transmit energy to their weapons more efficiently. Kari examined these thoughtfully.

Then the match began, and everything went wrong.

Kari ran with her team through the arena, which was a walled-off portion of the City, with lots of empty streets and abandoned buildings. Cameras lined every roof and corner. Lord Shaxx commentated each match. Every game was broadcast live on City TV networks, and much back-alley betting went on.

They found the opposing team running for the spot where heavy ammo would drop. Whoever held this spot usually won the match, because a rocket launcher would quickly wipe out the other team. The two teams exchanged fire. Kari lined up a shot on an enemy hunter's head and squeezed the trigger.

Rose misfired with a cough.

Kari cursed and fumbled with the gun. She cleared the chamber and tried again. Another Guardian in her sights, and-

Bang. Misfire.

Rose misfired nearly every single time Kari fired it. The only time it didn't was when she slid in to protect an injured teammate. Miraculously, it fired just in time to fell a charging Titan.

As a result, Kari was gunned down over and over. She resurrected each time, fighting mad from the pain of being shot, and frustrated with the temperamental Rose.

By the end of the match, Kari had earned one kill, as opposed to her team's twenty-five apiece. Her robes were soaked with blood.

"What happened out there?" one of her teammates asked. "You got spanked!"

"It's back to the mod shop with this piece of crap," Kari said, holding up Rose. "Misfires every time. I must have made a mistake in the assembly. Sorry about our scores, team. Our loss is all on me."

She left the team and returned to the Tower mod shop, fuming. It was late afternoon by the time. She had just enough time to look over Rose and try it on the firing range again before she had to go home.

As before, Rose's workings were flawless. When she took it to the firing range, it fired every time, blowing nice holes in the targets. Baffled, Kari took it home.

"This gun is broken," she announced as she walked in, handing it to Jayesh, grip-first.

He took it with a look of confusion. "What? Why?"

Kari stalked into their room, tore off her bloodied robes, and stuffed them down the laundry chute. "It misfired about fifty times in the Crucible. Cost us the match." She rummaged around in her dresser for fresh clothes and spotted Jayesh admiring her from the doorway.

"What?" she snapped, half-smiling.

"Nothing," he replied, folding his arms. "You look good, for having bled that much."

"Yeah, well." A little embarrassed, she pulled on a fresh shirt and pants. "I don't know what's wrong with Rose. It worked fine on the firing range before and after the match. But during the match? Nothing."

Jayesh blinked at the gun, looking as baffled as she felt. "Could there have been interference from another Guardian's Light?"

"I don't know," Kari groaned, flopping in the chair in the corner. "Maybe? That gun has nothing wrong with it. Why doesn't it work?"

"It misfired every time?" Jayesh said, opening the cylinder and unloading the bullets.

Kari sighed and studied the ceiling. "It fired one time. I was protecting a teammate until his ghost could heal him. Took down a Titan coming at us."

Jayesh's hands froze, the gun hanging open. "Say that again."

"I said it fired when I was protecting a teammate."

He stared at the weapon, eyes wide. "Dear, sweet Traveler."

"What?"

Jayesh swallowed. He slowly poured the bullets into his jacket pocket, then closed the cylinder with a crisp click. "It's picked up too much of my Light. I'm ... I'm really sorry about that. If I had only known ..."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," Jayesh said, "it won't attack Guardians. Only enemies. The one time it shot a Guardian was to protect another Guardian. I guess, when I started giving it my Light, I gave it something of myself. It has my ... disposition."

Kari stared at him for a long moment. "But that doesn't make sense. You're saying Rose can distinguish between targets? It thinks?"

Jayesh turned the weapon around and around in his hands. "I don't think it thinks, exactly. More like ... it senses Light and Darkness. Blast. That explains why it wouldn't work against Cadenza. I wasn't standing over someone, protecting them. If my team had been right there, it might have been different."

They both studied the weapon for a long moment. The engraved rose gleamed in the lamplight.

"So," Kari said slowly, "what now?"

Jayesh paced around the room, holding the weapon in both hands. "Well. I'll never have to worry about friendly fire. But it absolutely can't go in the Crucible. It doesn't understand sports. Only Light." He stashed the gun in the weapons chest in the corner. "I need to do some research. See if anything like this has ever been recorded before. Surely other Guardians have poured too much of themselves into their tools."

"You do that," Kari said, heaving herself to her feet. "Dinner is sandwiches because I'm too tired to make anything fancy."

"Right," Jayesh said absently, pulling out his tablet and tapping the screen.

Connor and Stephanie had been playing in their room, but came rushing out when they heard their mother in the kitchen. Kari gave them both hugs, then asked what sort of sandwiches they'd like. As grilled ham was the popular request, she pulled out her iron skillet and toasted sandwiches that way.

When she called Jayesh to dinner a little later, he drifted out of the bedroom, reading his tablet and unaware of his surroundings. He sat at the table, still reading. Kari reached out and gently pushed the tablet down. "Hello there. Nice of you to join us."

Jayesh looked up, mildly surprised to find himself at the dinner table. "Oh, hi. Sorry." He turned off his tablet and stowed it in his lap. "Hey, you said you weren't going to cook, but this looks great."

"Toasting sandwiches isn't really cooking," Kari said with a smile.

They ate together, the children updating their mother on the day with their father.

"And then Dad made a horse!" Connor said. "It was so huge! It went running around and jumping over the couch, and Stephanie was scared."

"I stuck to small constructs after that," Jayesh said, looking sheepish. "I was trying to teach them animal sounds, and I might have gotten carried away."

"It could have been worse," Kari said. "You could have showed them an elephant."

Jayesh glanced at the ceiling. "Not sure the roof's high enough for that."

After dinner, Kari read stories to the children and the ghosts, who perched themselves on the back of the couch and listened. When the children began to doze, she put them to bed. Varan went with Connor. Phoenix drifted away in search of Jayesh. Neko burrowed his way against Kari's neck, under her hair, his shell cold and hard against her skin.

"What's this?" she chuckled, stroking him.

"Crucible makes me tired," he said in her ear. "All those resurrections. I wish I could have helped more."

"It's all right, Neko. You're a great healer."

She felt the tiny movement of his mechanical eyelids as they closed and opened. "I don't want to be a failure of a ghost."

"You're not," she whispered. "Don't even go there."

He made a tiny, whispering beeping sound and closed his eye. He rode on her shoulder all the time she was finishing her chores for the night. When she finally entered the sanctuary of her room, Jayesh was still at his computer table, reading documents on his tablet. He didn't look up when she entered, completely absorbed. Neko politely vanished, giving Kari the impression of privacy.

Kari could have gone to bed and resented Jayesh for ignoring her. But she'd learned that subtle hints didn't work on her husband, especially when he was focused on a project. So she took the initiative, crossed the room, and slipped her arms around his neck from behind. "Hey," she whispered against his skin.

Jayesh's attention snapped away from his tablet. "Hey." He tilted his head back and smiled up at her. "Bedtime already?"

"It's after eight," she said, giving him a kiss and going in search of her pajamas.

Jayesh stood up and stretched. "Man, time flies. So I was reading about applied Light theory, especially as regards to Guardians and weapons. Lots of studies have found guns and swords taking on the essence of the Guardian's Light. More than just Solar or Void, even. Apparently, Lightweave is notorious for this. It actually infuses Light into the steel with long use."

"What's that mean for Rose?" Kari asked, buttoning her pajama top.

"That's the thing," Jayesh said. "Rose will be really awesome after I've been using it a few decades. I might be able to push my healing Light through it. But it requires so much Light to get to that point." He trailed off and frowned at his tablet.

"What?" Kari asked.

He looked up with the quick smile he used when hiding bad news. "Oh, nothing much. It's just ... there's a way to accelerate the amount of Light in a weapon. It's not very pleasant."

"Oh?" Kari said, climbing into bed. "Let me guess. More Crucible."

Jayesh undressed and climbed into his side of the bed, where he sat against the pillows with his tablet. "Um. Not exactly."

Kari thought. "You have to drop more supercharges on it?"

"No ..." He gazed at her a long moment. "Here. You read it." He passed her the tablet.

It displayed an article about the Hive. In particular, the way they were known to tear the Light out of Guardians and feed it to their young. When they had no immediate use for the Light, they stored it in huge crystals made of the various chemicals that occurred in Hive lairs.

Rem had died that way, his Light trapped in a crystal.

Kari's throat constricted and her stomach clenched. For a second, she thought she might throw up. She passed the tablet back to Jayesh and sat with a hand over her mouth. He sat perfectly still, watching her, waiting to dodge.

But she kept everything down and the impulse faded. She drew her knees to her chest and hugged them. "So. You want to. Feed Rose. A dead Guardian."

"It's a possibility," Jayesh said, setting his tablet aside. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. "Light, I'm sorry, lovelight. I knew I shouldn't have told you."

Kari's heart pounded in a sickening way, and heat flooded her. For a second, she was back at the rendezvous on the Dreadnaught, waiting for Rem's team ... waiting and waiting ... She gasped for air and pushed Jayesh away. He gazed at her in concern.

"Explain to me how this isn't exactly the same as Thorn," she said between breaths. Panic tore at her. Her Light shifted within her, disturbed, flickering at her fingertips and in her hair. Dead Guardians. The single survivor clawing his way out of the Dreadnaught in a stolen ship, sobbing about what had happened. The unbelievable, helpless horror.

"Shh," Jayesh said. "Calm down." He touched her shoulder and received a substantial static shock. He jerked his hand away. "Don't go Stormcaller, please."

Kari struggled to master the anxiety, but couldn't seem to calm down. "Talk to me!" she exclaimed. "Tell me Rose isn't Thorn! It's feeding on Light!"

"It's not the same," Jayesh said, keeping his voice low and soothing. "Thorn consumed Light and passed it to its user. Dredgen Yor used it to feed on people, himself. Rose is just a gun we're modding. I could boost its Light powers by any number of things. Using a Hive crystal is only one way."

Kari nodded, drawing deep breaths. Her heart still pounded too hard. Too many memories crowded her. She lunged out of bed, dropped to all fours, and began to do push-ups, just to give the panic an outlet.

Seventy-five push-ups later, her racing heart began to slow, the exercise burning off the adrenaline. The memories receded. Panting and shaky, Kari got a drink of water and sat on the edge of the bed, feeling as if a dark cloud had passed.

Jayesh watched her in silence. When she finally looked at him, he wore an expression of deep sadness. "You know what," he said softly. "It's not worth it. Rose can stay in the chest forever. I can't stand seeing you like this. Not over a stupid gun."

Wordlessly, Kari slid up beside him, wrapped her arms around him, and laid her head on his chest. His warmth and steady heartbeat seemed to radiate calm. He held her, stroking her hair, for a long time, not speaking. But somewhere, in her head, she heard him softly singing his song about a guiding star. She dozed off with the melody running through her mind.

Chapter Text

Neither of them mentioned Rose for the next few weeks. Jayesh was in and out on local missions, patrolling the City outskirts. Kari procured some math and English textbooks from a City school and began teaching Connor the basics. Stephanie was hugely jealous, and Kari had to print out pictures for her to color.

The Festival of the Lost drew closer. Candles appeared in greater numbers everywhere. Fall decorations appeared on people's doors and windows - wreaths of pretty orange leaves, pumpkins, ornamental corn. The Tower tea shop launched a new flavor called pumpkin spice. Kari didn't care for it, but other Guardians lined up for it.

Rose remained locked in the weapons chest. Jayesh went back to his other favorite guns, and trained with Kari's old sword, trying to find some way of replacing his missing Dawnblade.

Then rumors began to circulate.

Guardians in the field reported seeing a Guardian with a strange-looking weapon attached to her left arm. She wore armor decorated with gold and jewels, and was most often seen around Nessus and the Jovian moons. Guardians who ventured to Calus's ship reported seeing this rogue Guardian there, often standing watch from some remote doorway or balcony. Since she never came near the Tower, people guessed that she had thrown in with Emperor Calus. The name Shadow of Earth began to circulate.

The Vanguard put out an unofficial statement. If any Guardians met this rogue, they were to use extreme caution. She had proven hostile on several occasions, but didn't seem to seek out Guardians in particular. In this way, she wasn't like the Shadows of Yor, a group of thugs who worshiped the serial killer. But the similarity of the titles was unsettling.

Kari heard these rumors and it bothered her. She had seen Mako Cadenza shoot Jayesh simply for being in her way. She may be passive now, but Calus would eventually move her against his enemies. And all Guardians who refused to join his parties were enemies.

"I don't get it," Kari said one afternoon. She, Jayesh, Nell, and Grant were having lunch in the Tower atrium, surrounded by plants and flowers. Connor and Stephanie ran about, climbing the decorative rocks in the center of the atrium, and hanging from the branches of the little trees.

"What's not to get?" Nell said, tucking her jet-black hair behind one ear. "Cadenza is a sell-out. Light for sale to the highest bidder. I told you she was." The young Hunter was in plain clothing, except for her cloak. She loved her cloak and wore it everywhere, especially as the weather grew colder.

Grant-4 leaned one elbow on the table, holding a hot drink in his free hand. It was odd to see a robot eating and drinking, but that was how Exos were - they were built to take in food as a fuel source, because it made the body feel more human to the human mind inhabiting it.

"I, personally, pity this Shadow of Earth," Grant said. "She did not abandon us until her Vanguard, Cayde-6, was killed. According to the documents I read, they had been close friends for at least two centuries. She was burned out on this immortal life, but Cayde kept her grounded."

"Losing Cayde sucked for everyone," Nell muttered, pushing a cold potato wedge around her plate. "I only knew him a little while and it still messes me up."

"I knew him a long time," Kari muttered. "His death has left a void in the Vanguard. I doubt they'll ever replace him. Not until Zavala and Ikora step down."

Jayesh leaned forward, lowering his voice. "We know how Cadenza got that weapon on her arm. Has anybody noticed if it's ... spreading?"

None of them wanted to mention the word SIVA.

"Not in the reports I saw," Grant replied.

Nell held up her own left arm and flexed her hand. "It might be kind of cool to replace this with a gun. For about two hours. Then I'd regret my life choices." She made a finger gun. "Pew pew."

"Nobody has seen Cadenza without her armor since the augmentation," Grant went on, casting a brief smile at Nell. Expressions on his mechanical face were subtle, easy to miss, but his team were used to him. "However, her overall profile has not changed. No extra bulk or spikes or whatever. Perhaps the particular strain we found had not been given the command to consume, enhance, replicate."

"Maybe that's why she sought it out," Jayesh said. "It wasn't originally intended to hurt people. Either way, we'll need to watch out for her when we're working the outer planets."

"Speaking of," Nell said, making a face. "Zavala has our fireteam under consideration for a Dreadnaught patrol."

Kari stiffened and went cold. The Dreadnaught was the flagship of the Hive - an immense hexagonal tube that was said to be the corpse of a Worm God. During the Battle of Saturn, it had blasted a hole in the rings and still lurked there, silent, now, without the Hive god Oryx. But the lesser Hive still lived and bred there, using it as a staging area to invade the rest of the solar system. Only constant Guardian attack kept their numbers down.

Jayesh glanced at her, sensing her discomfort. "Why us?"

Grant lifted a hand. "It's like this. Nobody really wants to patrol the Dreadnaught, but Guardians have to do it to keep the Hive and Taken down. Also, both types of creature have been multiplying since the curse began on the Dreaming City, and this is worrying. Commander Zavala is trying to be fair and rotate fireteams through that patrol. Everyone else has already been there at least once, and we're the only ones who haven't."

There was a moment of silence. Kari watched her children swing from the tree branches and didn't look at her team or her husband. All of them carefully didn't look at her, either.

"Well," Jayesh said, forcing a smile. "It'll be educational."

"Isn't that ship also merged with Oryx's throne world?" Nell asked. "So most of it exists in another dimension or something? I was reading about it and it's so weird."

"So they say," Grant began, but Kari interrupted him.

"Yes."

Now everyone looked at her. Kari kept her gaze on Connor and Stephanie. "I led the team that killed Oryx. It was ... pretty bad." She couldn't explain the horror of the alien appearing out if nowhere, monstrously huge, bat wings spreading from his shoulders like a demon in a painting. His constant tugging at their Light, trying to Take the Guardians and enslave them to his will.

But she had gone into the fight expecting the fear and the stench and so forth. She hadn't expected to lose her husband. He hadn't even been at the fight - his team had gotten lost and trapped on a lower level of the ship.

Nell said it for all of them. "Oh, because that's where your first husband died, right. Well, good thing you don't have to go, right?"

Kari forced a smile. "Nope. Or run dispatch, either."

"Actually," Jayesh said in a low voice, "I was hoping you would, Kari. You're the only one of us who knows that ship. You could guide us on dispatch better than Silvan could. I asked her about it, and she was fighting Taken in the Reef when Oryx fell."

Kari didn't want to go there in her head, didn't want to face those fears and memories. But as she looked around at her team, taking in their earnest expressions, she realized that saying no would let them down. She did have more practical knowledge than any of them. And she did remember a lot of the traps and pitfalls waiting inside the Dreadnaught - deep chasms, blind corners, wide-open sacrificial rooms where the only cover was a single pillar.

Surely they wouldn't go anywhere near where Rem had perished.

She sighed. "All right. I'll do it." She clenched her fists. "And kill some Hive Wizards for me. Those are what killed Rem and the rest of his fireteam."

Nell gave her a thumbs-up. "All in a day's work."

Grant nodded. He studied Kari, observing the way she sat rigid and spoke through her teeth. He said, very gently, "We shall not let it happen again." His orange eyes flicked toward Jayesh.

A lump formed in Kari's throat. She swallowed and nodded, unable to speak.

She was gripped by terror all the way home, with Jayesh beside her and the children skipping alongside them. Losing Rem to the Hive had been bad enough ... losing Jayesh the same way would destroy her. She wanted to scream and run away, or grab Jayesh and lock him up so he could never go on any more missions. She wanted to go full Stormcaller on Zavala for assigning the Dreadnaught mission.

But she could do none of those things. So she walked sedately along, answering the questions the children continually asked, and chatting easily with Jayesh.

But her husband knew her too well. Once they were back in their apartment, he drew her aside. "What's wrong?"

She could only stare at him, trying to beat back the fear that threatened to drown her.

He took her hands. "Are you afraid the Hive will get me?"

Kari nodded.

Jayesh swallowed and looked away. After a moment, he met her gaze again, forcing a smile. "I can't promise it won't happen. But I think it's pretty unlikely. Not on the Dreadnaught, with Guardians chewing the Hive up all the time."

Kari drew a deep breath, trying to quell the hysterical panic. "I need to go for a walk. Calm down. Will you watch the kids?"

"Sure," Jayesh said, his brows furrowed in concern. "Take as long as you need."

Kari went for another run along the top of the wall.

The cool afternoon wind in her face, the feel of her stretching muscles, the pounding of her feet against the concrete - all of it helped calm the adrenaline that continually blasted her bloodstream. She thought in time with her footfalls, "Lost-Rem-won't-lose-Jayesh." She chanted this in her mind, over and over.

When she stopped to catch her breath, Neko said in her head, "How, though?"

"I don't know," she gasped, leaning against the wall's parapet. "Nothing I can do will change things. Except good dispatch. Intel."

"Tell him to take Rose," Neko suggested. "He's made it into a protection gun."

Kari thought of Rose with a sort of savage, vengeful triumph. "Maybe he'll use it to destroy Hive crystals. Avenge Rem and all the other Guardians the Hive have eaten. And you know what? I'm going to make Rose bloom."

"Ooo," Neko exclaimed in delight. "Back to the mod shop?"

"Back to the mod shop," said Kari.

It was a busy afternoon in the mod shop. Kari had Neko transmat Rose to her, then had to share a workstation with an Exo Titan who had scattered his auto rifle across most of his space.

"Hey, I'm Valis," he said, offering her a hand. "I'll try to keep my mess from overflowing. What mods you doing?"

"Light conduction," Kari said, laying Rose in a clear spot. "Loads of Light conduction."

"Let me know if you need anything," Valis replied, attention returning to his own weapon. He seemed to be trying to weld four barrels to the same enormous chamber and magazine. Kari kept the width of the workbench between them.

But soon she was absorbed in putting together the components she wanted for Rose's new design. She smelted the reagents for the energy-conducting metal - spirit bloom, phase glass, and spin metal. Once it reached the proper temperature, she poured it into a basic mold to create a flat sheet. She tempered it, slowly, watching the color cool from bright red to dull gray. Neko kept up a running commentary in her head, telling her what to do and when to do it.

Other Guardians were busy smelting, too, and the mod shop was hot inside from the heat of the furnaces. Someone opened the windows and brought in a couple of fans. The chilly outside air felt wonderful to Kari, who was sweltering.

When the metal was cool enough to handle, Kari cut it into long strips. Then she used smaller tools to shape each strip into the curled petals she had sketched the last time she had been here. Neko helpfully carried snapshots of the drawings.

She carefully twined each petal around Rose, laying them along the barrel in a spiral pattern. She wound them around the grip, then added a curled bud at the bottom. The Lightweave beneath the petals protruded in spikes like a flower's thorns. Kari's model-building skills served her well.

"It has thorns, but not like Thorn," Neko observed. "Nothing like that."

"It's a reminder of what Rose used to be," Kari remarked, making minuscule adjustments with a pair of needle-nose pliers. "Maybe it shows what it can be, now."

"It's a Light conductor," Neko said, flying around the weapon and scanning it. "Between its weird friendly-fire perk, and now all this conductive metal, you're handing Jayesh a magic wand."

"That's the idea," Kari said, engraving details on each petal. "I want him to be able to protect. And also heal. Can a gun heal someone?"

Neko chuckled, spinning both halves of his shell. "Mako Cadenza has a weapon that fires Light. Why shouldn't we have a weapon that fires healing? Call it an un-gun."

Kari kept working, although outside, the sun had set and it was growing late. Valis had packed up his rifle and gone home, so she had the workbench to herself.

As she engraved scrollwork on each petal, Kari breathed her own Light into each stroke. Blue sparks danced from her fingertips into the white metal, adding tiny marks and glints. With her Light, she poured in her anxiety, her love for Jayesh, her desire for him to use this gun to protect others.

"Traveler be with him," she whispered, pressing in each fine line with a tool. "Fill him with inspiration and wisdom in every fight. Grant him more Light so he can stand against the Darkness. Let this Rose be a blessing in his hands - grace to his team, terror to his enemies. Let it be a weapon of the Light."

Beside her, Neko's eye brightened. He opened his shell, expanding into a little sphere of blue Light, as if preparing to heal or resurrect her. Instead, he pulsed his Light into Rose. The petals flashed and shimmered as the Light passed along them and into the frame beneath.

"What was that?" Kari asked him.

Neko closed his shell, shrinking back into his usual shape. He ducked shyly and didn't meet her gaze. "I figured a little extra Light wouldn't hurt anything."

"What'd you do?" Kari said, watching him. "You can tell me."

Neko looked at her, then at Rose. "I sealed in your love."

"You sealed ... what's that mean?"

He shrugged his shell. "I can't explain it. But he'll know, next time he uses it. He'll feel your Light."

Kari kept working, thoughtfully. She kept saturating Rose with Light until the metal thrummed beneath her hands.

A few hours later, Neko said, "Phoenix is pinging me. It's getting late and Jayesh is worried about you. He wants to know if you need help."

Kari blinked away an annoying blurriness that kept creeping across her eyes. "Tell him I'm coming home. I've been working on Rose in the mod shop."

Neko relayed this. After a moment, he said, "Phoenix says Jayesh has been pacing the apartment since the children went to bed. He asks you to please come home."

Kari's heart smote her with guilt. She hastily put away her tools and cleaned up the scraps and metal shavings she had left behind. Then she took Rose across the Tower Walk and down the stairs to the apartments in the wall.

Jayesh met her at the door. He wore a bathrobe with the belt tied haphazardly, and his hair looked as if he'd been digging his fingers into it. His mouth was tight with concern. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," Kari said, holding out Rose in both hands. "Look."

Jayesh glanced at the gun, then returned his attention to her. "You left in the middle of a panic attack. Then you stayed out until midnight. Are you sure you're all right?"

She set the gun on the table, then hugged him tightly. "I worked it off, heartspark," she whispered, stroking his disheveled hair. "I went for a run, and spent the rest of the time cutting up metal. All good exercise. Rose is a lightning rod for your Light, now."

He hugged her tightly, his scratchy cheek pressed against her neck. "I was working through every worst-case scenario. Like maybe you'd left forever. Just ... hopped a ship and took off."

"I wouldn't do that to you," Kari said, giving him a little shake. "I promised, too, remember? You're stuck with me and my moods." She kissed him - across the cheek and the bridge of his nose, then down to his lips.

He relaxed a little. "There's my Kari. I'm glad you were only ..." He glanced at Rose. "... turning my gun into an art project."

Now he actually picked it up and examined it, tilting it back and forth, admiring Kari's handiwork. "You did all this in one afternoon?"

"It's like building a model," Kari said, enjoying his admiration. "When I hit the zone, I build fast."

Jayesh opened the cylinder, saw it was empty, and closed it again. "Will it fire Light, do you think?"

"I don't know," Kari replied. "It's so attuned to you, I think you're the only one who could use it for that."

He gazed at her with an odd expression, the blue Light in his eyes shimmering like the sea. "You are an amazing woman."

She smiled, suddenly shy.

Jayesh made as though to say something romantic, but interrupted himself with a huge yawn. "Can we go to bed now?"

She laughed. "Definitely, sleepyhead."

Chapter Text

It was a week before Fireteam Solarflare was given their mission to patrol the Dreadnaught. Kari tried to keep busy and not worry about it, but it was still a blow when the message arrived.

Jayesh took Rose with him on patrols all week, using it to protect his team. He was delighted to find how well it responded to his Light in combat. As Kari had planned, the petals conducted Light and empowered each bullet. But he couldn't work his healing power through it.

"Maybe I'm expecting too much," Jayesh told her over breakfast, as they discussed the Dreadnaught mission. "Rose is a gun. Guns don't heal people. Still, it responds to my Sunsinger song."

"Maybe it just needs more Light," Kari said.

Jayesh gave her a significant look. "You think I should hunt crystals?"

She shrugged, trying to appear noncommittal, even though her stomach clenched. "If you run across some, I won't stop you. Have there been Guardian casualties on the Dreadnaught lately?"

Jayesh summoned Phoenix and asked. After a moment of consulting the Vanguard records, Phoenix replied, "Not in three and a half years. The last recorded Guardian casualty was a result of Taken quenching a Guardian's Light. No crystals created."

"Because that's still a thing," Kari muttered.

Jayesh patted her shoulder. "There may not be any crystals to find, lovelight. It'll probably just be a boring, normal run. Kill Hive. Blow up their brood lairs. Slime. Filth. Worms."

"Not on the upper decks," Kari said. "The upper levels are that clean temple architecture, kind of gothic-looking. It's the lower decks where the gross breeding stuff is."

Jayesh looked at the remains of his breakfast, then pushed it aside. "Note to self. Don't talk about the Hive while eating."

"I'm going to blow up the Hive," Connor announced, where he had been eating his way through a pile of scrambled eggs. "And all their ships. And nobody will have to be afraid of them any more."

"When you're grown, sure," Jayesh said with a grin. "I'll invite you into our fireteam."

Connor pumped a fist. "Yes! Go kill things with Nell and Grant! How tall do I have to be? This tall?" He held a hand a few inches above his head.

Jayesh held a hand even with his own head. "This tall."

Connor looked disappointed. "That'll take ages."

"About fifteen more years," Jayesh said. "It'll be here before you know it."

"Well," Connor said, leaning his elbows on the table, "I'm going to be a Titan. Like Grant. I'm going to wear armor and punch things." He clenched a fist and punched an imaginary foe.

"Not a warlock?" Kari said.

Connor shook his head. "Stephanie can be a warlock."

Jayesh and Kari chuckled.

They spent the rest of the day preparing for the mission. Jayesh, Nell, and Grant talked strategies and weapons. Kari arranged to work dispatch and leave the children with Naomi again. Naomi was fine with this, especially with the promise of another sleepover for Reuben in the future.

Silvan was already working with another team, and was disappointed she wouldn't get to dispatch for Jayesh again. She communicated this to Kari via ghost messages.

"But my leg is almost completely well!" she added, brightening. "I'll be back in the field in another few weeks. I can't wait!"

Kari was secretly relieved. She couldn't face another mission with a partner continually enthusing about Kari's husband.

"She needs her own man to enthuse about," Jayesh said, when Kari told him this. "She's going to get into trouble, otherwise."

"Throw her at Madrid," Kari laughed. "Our own Awoken convict."

Jayesh shook his head. "I wouldn't do that to poor Madrid. His life is hard enough. There's plenty of other eligible Awoken guys around who would love a cute sidekick."

Jayesh departed an hour later with Nell and Grant. It would take nine hours to make the Saturn run, due to course corrections and multiple jumps. Kari would be up all night, running dispatch.

She made sure that she and the children took good, long naps that afternoon. Then she packed them up for a sleepover and took them to Naomi's.

"Oh boy, now you get to sleep at our house!" Reuben greeted them. "Hey Connor, can I pet your ghost? Please?"

Kari watched the children cluster together in Naomi's living room, Reuben gently stroking Varan, who explained that usually, people didn't touch someone else's ghost.

Naomi sighed, watching them. "He wants his own ghost so bad, Kari," she said in an undertone. "I don't know what to do about him."

"Have you had his Light tested?" Kari murmured.

Naomi shook her head. "They said to wait a few years, give it time to build up." She smiled a little. "Not sure I could handle two Guardians in the house."

"You get used to it," Kari said, giving her a hug. "It's just a job, more or less."

"If you say so." Naomi returned the hug. "Be careful out there."

"I'm only on dispatch," Kari said. "It's my team who needs to be careful."

When Kari arrived at her dispatch station a little later, Commander Zavala was waiting for her. He wore the same gleaming parade armor, and Kari wondered if he ever took it off. His eyes glowed laser-blue as he met her gaze.

"Good evening, Guardian," he said. "I trust that you will keep your communication professional, this time?"

"Yes, sir," Kari replied, heat creeping into her cheeks.

Zavala nodded. "Consider this a trial. If you cannot keep it together when your husband is in danger, you will be relieved of dispatch duty for your fireteam. I understand the depth of the marriage bond, but it can be a liability in the field. Understand?"

"Yes, sir." Sweat broke out on Kari's back. This was it. If she blew this mission, she'd be kicked off dispatch forever.

"Good," Zavala said. "I'll leave you to it." He moved off to supervise the other dispatchers, tapping his tablet.

Kari sat down, donned a headset, and loaded the strike programs. Information on the Dreadnaught flooded her screen. She connected to her team's frequency and was dismayed to find a lag time of two minutes.

"Why is there lag on the Light communication network?" she asked Neko, who floated beside her in his blue shell.

"Relativity," Neko replied. "The team is still traveling away from us, and they're entering Saturn's gravity well. The lag should drop once they board the Dreadnaught."

Kari tuned into their chatter. Nell was saying, "It's the perfect name, right? Rose is what the gun used to be. A lumen is the inside of a plant's cell structure, and also a measurement of light. Lumina."

"It's genius," Jayesh said, his grin audible in his voice. "Rose has bloomed into an all-new weapon, so it makes sense to change the name."

Kari checked the team's position. "Just letting you know I'm here, guys. Let me know when you make your approach."

The team talked about Lumina for a little longer before her message reached them. Then Jayesh said, "Hey there, Kari! ETA twenty minutes. We can see the Dreadnaught, we just have to approach carefully so the ice field of the rings doesn't chew up our ships."

The Hive ship sat in a little hole in Saturn's rings, like a festering splinter. Of course, the hole was hundreds of miles wide, but it looked small from a distance. Saturn's yellow atmosphere reflected a warm glow onto the ship as they neared it.

Kari didn't say much, keeping an eye on the lag timer. The team swept in and transmatted into the Dreadnaught, where other Guardians had set up a transmat network on an outer landing. There they found a gang of skeletal Hive thralls hard at work dismantling the gear, so they immediately dropped into a fight.

"This was two minutes ago," she muttered to Neko, watching the feeds from the three helmet cameras. "That's a long time in a firefight."

"I don't like this," Neko said, watching the latency timer. "Something's interfering with their ghosts' Light. We don't have latency when ghosts communicate. Light is non-local quanta. There is no travel time."

They watched as the team dispatched the thralls - creatures like human skeletons wrapped in dusty, withered-looking flesh, faces without eyes, and long teeth. They wore no armor and a few bullets shredded them, but they traveled in packs of ten or twenty. Each one had a worm inside it, feeding on the alien's desire, and the energy released by every creature that died to its host. If any alien refused to kill, the worm would devour it from the inside.

The last thrall fell, and the fireteam took time to repair the transmat station and secure the iron box over it again.

"Kari?" Jayesh said. "We'd better wait for her to catch up, guys. We have two minutes of lag."

Kari waited until the team was silent, then said, "This is dangerous, team. I'll have to talk over you and trust that you can hear me. Something is blocking the Light - more than normal, for the Dreadnaught. See if your ghosts can figure out what it is. In the meantime, cross the upper deck. In about a hundred meters, you'll find a ramp leading down. Follow that down to the second deck and go ham on the Hive for me."

A long moment later, the team nodded. "Aye aye, ma'am," Nell said, saluting in the wrong direction. "Gentlemen, let's lock and load." She drew her daggers and pretended to release the safety on each.

"Grant, you take point," Jayesh said, holding up Lumina. "I'll play rearguard. This gun absolutely cannot hurt a teammate, so don't worry about that."

"Nothing is less friendly than friendly fire," Grant said, lifting an auto rifle from its shoulder strap. "Forth, Solarflare!"

"He's so hot when he talks like those books he collects," Nell muttered to Jayesh. "Are Titans allowed to be smart? Because homeboy got brains."

"Dumb Titans are a stereotype," Jayesh replied. "Just like snooty warlocks and loner hunters."

"I've met some pretty dumb Titans," Grant said from ahead. "But dumb is a relative term. They knew how to kill things extremely fast, and how to reload a gun faster than the eye could follow. But they never touched a book if they could help it."

"Neither do I," Nell said. When Jayesh and Grant gave her disappointed looks, she added, "Hadrian reads them to me."

"Oh good," Jayesh said with mock relief. "For a minute there, I thought I was going to have to kick you off the fireteam."

They entered the darkness within the Dreadnaught and were immediately set upon by the Hive - thralls running at the team's faces, acolytes running behind pillars and doorways firing Hive Boomers in bursts of white fire. Grant took several bolts to the chest. Jayesh ran up and defended him until his ghost could stabilize him. Rose - or Lumina - burned in his hand, seeming to draw on Jayesh's protective Light. Kari watched the screens closely, aware that what she was seeing had happened two minutes earlier.

Grant's ghost healed him. He got back up and resumed fighting, his metal fists crushing thrall skulls in flashes of Light. Jayesh followed behind, killing acolytes. Nell disappeared into the shadows, circling to flank. The aliens on the left side of the deck suddenly screeched and wheeled about, only to find shadow blades in their throats.

The team worked like a machine, each member playing to the strengths of the others. Kari watched them with a surge of pride. The time lag didn't matter - they were fully-trained Guardians, experts in battle tactics. What did she have to worry about?

As they reached the ramp that led to the lower deck, Neko said, "I'm getting a read on the source of the lag."

"What is it?"

Neko flagged a spot on Kari's Dreadnaught map. "Darkness pulses are emanating from this spot. The energy pattern reads like a Hive song ritual of some kind. If the team makes a small detour, they can halt the ritual and restore communications."

Kari relayed this to the team, sending the map data. Then she waited, watching the screens, as the team descended the ramp. They entered a long hallway of black stone, the ceiling supported by severely-carved pillars, all harsh corners and straight lines. The hall echoed with the chittering, screeching voices of more Hive, all communicating about the latest Guardian invasion. A pack of thralls rushed the team just as Kari's message got through.

"What'd she say?" Nell shouted, her knives flashing.

"Something about halting a ritual!" Jayesh yelled back, punching a thrall with a fistful of fire.

"That way!" Grant added. "Come on!"

Nell beheaded a thrall and kicked the body away as it fell. "Why do we have to mess with a gross ritual?"

"I couldn't hear," Jayesh replied. "But it's probably important."

"It's to restore communications!" Kari said. But again, their conversation was old news. Her comment would make no sense by the time it reached them.

"Ugh," said Jayesh's ghost, Phoenix. "I don't feel so good. The Darkness is really thick down here."

"Me too," said Grant's ghost. "I don't know if I can heal you."

"I feel fine," Nell's ghost, Hadrian, replied. "I mean, mostly."

Kari bit back a curse and looked at Neko, floating at her shoulder and twitching his shell nervously. "They can handle this. Right?"

"Right," Neko replied. "They've broken rituals before. They know how it's done. Find the runic circle. Defile it with Light. Kill the Wizards singing the magic up. Deface the runes. Simple."

On the screen, the three camera views of the team began to fizz with static. Kari glimpsed a green circle on the floor, its edge lined with symbols that burned her eyes, even on a screen. Then the cameras fizzed out.

But the sound still came through. Jayesh was saying, "They've got something in the middle of that circle. Looks like a thrall. Target the Wizards first. I'll run into the circle and drop a Well of Radiance. That much Light destroys these ritual circles. Then we can stand there and heal while we deal with the rest of them."

"Kari," Neko said suddenly. "That's a Guardian in that circle. I'm picking up the ghost tag."

"What!" Kari exclaimed. But the noise of battle filled her headphones. She waited, listening, watching the dead camera views. She heard the crisp shing of Jayesh's Well of Radiance. Hive screeched and weapons roared.

The audio feed cut out, too.

"Lost contact," Neko said. "Trying to re-establish."

Kari wanted to beat her fist on the table. Instead, she wound her fingers together and clenched her teeth. Professional. Keep it professional. She tapped a key to clear the old signal. The menu displayed a stronger signal from Fireteam Solarflare now. Neko logged in.

The camera views flickered to life, and the audio abruptly resumed. All three views showed her team running full tilt down a long, dark hallway, panting as they went.

"What's happening?" Kari exclaimed.

"Good news and bad news," Jayesh replied. "Good news is, the lag cleared up. Bad news? There was a Guardian in that ritual and cleansing it pissed her off. Oh yeah. Guess who."

"Not Cadenza?" Kari exclaimed.

"Mako Shark Cadenza!" Nell exclaimed. "And she's chasing us and she's mad!"

"Why was she in the ritual?" Kari said. "Was she a prisoner?"

"No," Grant replied. "Her armor has Hive runes on it now. Another upgrade. Like the SIVA."

"Which she still has," Jayesh added.

Kari struggled to grasp this. "Why would the Hive give her their power? She's a Guardian!"

"My guess is that Calus bribed them," Jayesh said. "Dispatch, guide us, please!"

Kari hurriedly checked her maps. "Uh, crossroads ahead, turn left and take the stairs."

As the team turned the corner, an energy projectile hit the wall behind them and exploded. It blinded the cameras and maxed out the audio with static. Kari yanked off her headset with a wince.

When the camera view returned, her team was galloping down a flight of stairs.

"No, no, up the stairs!" Kari exclaimed.

"There was no up!" Nell retorted. "Only down, and you said stairs, and-"

The team reached the bottom of the stairs and plunged into knee-deep liquid. Black, viscous liquid that bubbled and gave off a foul stench. Mounds of dead Hive bodies, all bones and rotten flesh, was piled on either side. Huge worms slithered through it.

Nell shrieked in disgust and used her Light to jump out of the muck, landing on a pile of bones. Jayesh and Grant splashed after her.

"Is this the right way?" Grant asked. "This looks like one of their brood lairs, which wasn't part of our mission."

Kari glanced at the map. Cadenza's hostile marker was moving down the stairs after them. "It's not the right way, but Cadenza is right behind you. Follow the left-hand wall, there's more stairs leading out."

The team leaped from pile to pile of refuse, the men grimly silent, Nell keeping up a constant stream of, "Ew, ew, ew," followed by obscenities.

Cadenza arrived and fired after them. The Light projectile struck a pile of bones and exploded, scattering bones and rot in all directions. The team spun about and opened fire. Cadenza ducked back into the stairwell.

Kari watched, rubbing the back of her hand. She had been fighting in a brood lair much like that one when she had taken a wound from a spike grenade. The wound had been contaminated with that black liquid, and the infection had nearly killed her. Seeing it again made her hand itch with the memory of the pain and fever.

Without a word, Neko flew up and touched her cheek with his eye in a tiny ghost kiss. She patted his shell and watched her screen.

The fireteam found the other flight of stairs, which led up, this time. It opened into a huge area that may have one been a single room. But it had been partitioned off into smaller rooms and passages, each one holding eggs or Hive larvae.

"Crap, this is new," Kari said, pulling up map after map. "I don't have the layout. Your ghosts will have to map it as you go. There used to be an exit passage far to the right."

The team groaned.

"Well, I'm busting some eggs," Nell said, tossing a grenade into a nest. "Fire in the egg-in-the-hole!"

The team ducked into a different room as the grenade exploded, splattering the walls with yellow goo.

"This way's blocked," Grant said. "Go back."

Jayesh paused and studied a pillar with a single Hive rune etched on it. "Dispatch, these runes are navigation markers of some kind. Can we get a translation?"

Kari had studied the Hive after Rem died - their strange, symbol-based language, their Gnostic philosophy that disregarded the physical life as superfluous, the way they used the Sword Logic to feed their gods. Understanding had not abated her hatred for the alien race. As a result, she knew enough Hive to read simple runes, although she hated doing it. In the Hive language, the meaning of a word was the same as the word itself. To read the word death was to die. However, this rune was slightly more benign.

"It says Growth," Kari said. "The one further down says Strength."

"Ah, for their young, right," Jayesh said. "This way, everybody."

They hurried down several crooked corridors, pausing to read Hive runes, which all were arranged to promote the development of the young thralls. Behind them, on the map, Cadenza began to catch up.

"Move faster, guys," Kari said. "Cadenza hasn't given up."

Chapter Text

The group turned a corner and ran head-on into a Hive Wizard flying the other way. It was humanoid, about six feet tall had it been standing, with a horned head and three green eyes. But it floated in midair, and instead of legs, had only a swath of filaments like a trailing gown. It shrieked in rage and began to conjure energy out of nowhere to hurl at them.

The team fired at the wizard, but their bullets only sparked off the energy shield protecting it. Cadenza was rapidly catching up, so they ducked under the alien and ran on. Behind them, the wizard set its sights on Cadenza with another screech.

"Why is she chasing us?" Grant exclaimed. "We technically rescued her!"

"See if you can get a look at her," Kari said. "What runes did she pick up?"

Jayesh looked over his shoulder and halted, trying to give her a clear view. Cadenza was shooting at the wizard, ducking back and forth across the hallway to avoid an energy bolt to the face.

"Okay, run," Kari said. As Jayesh hurried on, Kari captured the footage and extracted several screenshots. The runes burned into Cadenza's armor were all too clear: one on each shoulder, and two in the center of the breastplate. One was incomplete.

"Oh great," Kari muttered. "They say Strength, Cunning, False Truth. The last one is unfinished. I think it would have been Madness Upon Foes, but it only says Madness."

"Oh great!" Nell exclaimed. "So we have a strong, smart, lying, crazy Guardian after us. Can we shoot her?"

"She's already attacked you, so yes," Kari said, glancing at the protocol notice to confirm. She switched off her mic and muttered, "Neko, what will Hive runes do to a Lightbearer?"

"I don't exactly know," her ghost replied. "Other Guardians have used single sigils etched with a rune to open Hive gates, or enter force fields that would otherwise have repelled them. Some have even fed worms. But to carve runes into one's armor? Any time someone looks at those runes and reads them, they take effect upon the wearer. The song is the same as the singer."

"Good thing none of the team can read Hive runes," Kari said. "I won't read them aloud, either."

She flipped her mic back on as the team found a darkened doorway. They ran inside - and found themselves in a dead end. The doorway at the far end had been filled with some kind of disgusting Hive issue that had hardened like concrete. But as they turned to double back, Cadenza stepped into the doorway.

Grant moved first. He called on his Light and summoned a barricade across the doorway. It covered all but a foot of space at the top. The shield would repel projectiles, and if an enemy walked through it, it would shatter like glass, shredding armor and skin.

"Hold her off!" Jayesh exclaimed, drawing his sidearm, Drang. He fired at the Hive filth in the blocked doorway. It began to crack.

Cadenza stood outside the doorway, gazing through the shield at Grant. Her helmet masked her expression, the T-shape of the eye slits making her seem like one more alien.

Grant waved. "Hey."

Cadenza shifted her weight, lifting her SIVA arm. The barrel of her weapon glowed briefly, then went out. "Your shield won't remain forever," she said. "None of you stand a chance against me anymore. No Guardian does."

Nell took a flying leap and hit the blocked doorway feet first. Some of the bone-like mass crumbled and one of her boots got stuck.

"Keep her talking," Kari murmured over their headsets. "You'll be free in a minute."

Grant said, "Why do you pursue us? Surely we mean nothing to you."

"Surely," Cadenza said with a sudden laugh. "Do you see this unfinished rune? It will never be completed. My bargain with the Hive was for a single ritual. They believe that you are my team and that I betrayed them. I will prove them wrong by killing you all and drinking your Light." Her masked face turned, looking toward Nell and Jayesh. "Especially the warlock. Why is Khatri always in my way? Are you following me, Khatri?"

"Nope, sorry," Jayesh panted, kicking more holes in the blocked doorway. "I'm just going where I'm sent."

"I doubt that," Cadenza said, lifting her SIVA arm and stroking the barrel. "You got to Thorn before I did, even though Malphur tipped me off. You got to the SIVA augmentation machine before I did. And you arrived on the Dreadnaught in the middle of my ritual." Her voice was rising, filled with frustration. "You are hunting me. No matter what I do, Fireteam Solarflare is there. Jayesh Khatri, bane of the Last City, hero of the Dreaming City. I know who you are. But I don't understand why. Why? Why is it always you?"

Jayesh turned to face Cadenza through the shield, panting from cleaning out the blocked doorway. Nell kept working.

"To tell you the truth," he replied, "I don't know why. Maybe it's the Traveler's will that our paths cross so often. Perhaps it offers you redemption."

Cadenza jerked her head. "Don't speak to me of redemption, Khatri. I've seen the Warlords rise and fall, all serving the Traveler in their own ways. The Iron Lords were no better than the Warlords. And now the Vanguard and their precious Last City. The Light is a power source. The Traveler offers no goodness, no moral guidance. Otherwise it would have checked its evil Guardians before they rampaged out of control. It would have kept Cayde from dying. But no. There's no point to fighting anymore. Emperor Calus has it right. The Darkness will return and the Traveler will be quenched. The only option left to us is to drown ourselves in revelry until nightfall."

A short silence followed this speech. Jayesh stood there, Drang in one hand, Lumina in the other. Nell and Grant looked at him expectantly. Kari waited, too. In moments like this, Jayesh always said something surprising, even entertaining.

He slowly holstered both his weapons. Then he opened both empty hands. "Someone hurt you, didn't they? Someone you loved."

Cadenza drew back with a hiss of breath through clenched teeth.

When she said nothing, Jayesh went on, "I can't imagine the things you've been through, Cadenza. I don't know your secrets. But you're mistaken about the Light. I've found it to have extremely moral judgments, should any Guardian care to look. All Guardians have free will to choose their own paths - whether into greater Light, or into the shadows. And anyone who treads the Path of Sorrow brings Darkness upon themselves. Deserted by their ghosts, eaten alive by despair and pain. The Traveler does not check them, but it is injured. The Darkness is all too happy to scourge them in the Traveler's stead. But you ... there's still a chance for you. The Darkness beckons, but it has not yet claimed you. Come back to the Light, Mako Cadenza."

She lowered her SIVA weapon to her side and stood there for a long moment. Grant struggled to hold his barrier in place. Kari waited, holding her breath, to see how their enemy would react. Cadenza had been on their side, once.

Cadenza lifted her remaining hand and touched her glowing runes. "Strength. Cunning. False Truth. Just as I am gifted the ability to lie, so do I know lies when I hear them. And Jayesh Khatri, you are blinded by the Light you serve. You would have me return to a life of empty illumination. However, I have chosen a different path - one of shadow and shape. I am the Shadow of Earth, beloved of Calus, chief assassin among all Guardians. I will exterminate you one by one, until only I am left. And in the end, I will sacrifice my ghost, and I, too, will face death. Oblivion awaits, Solarflare. You may not choose how it befalls you."

Grant's shield flickered.

Cadenza's cannon whipped up, the barrel glowing purple.

Nell whirled and flung a single knife made of Light through the gap above the shield. Cadenza ducked. It gave the team just enough time to converge on the other doorway. Grant shoulder-charged through the remaining Hive muck, clearing a hole for the other two. They dashed inside.

But there was no floor. Behind the sealed door was an air shaft of some kind. The Guardians plummeted down, striking the walls, slowing themselves as best as they could. After what felt like a very long drop, they hit a stone floor. Grant landed hard enough to snap his ankle. He yelped and crumpled in the pitch blackness.

"Where the hell are we?" Nell exclaimed. "Lights?"

Their ghosts appeared and ignited their headlights. The team had fallen into a chamber deep in the lower decks of the Dreadnaught somewhere. One wall was slanted outward, part of the ship's hexagonal hull. The floor was polished stone, with more harshly carved pillars supporting the roof. But the two doorways leading out had been sealed shut with organic Hive matter that had hardened like bone. The team was caged in a room about fifty feet long by twelve feet wide.

"I think you lost Cadenza, for now," Kari reported, watching her marker. "She's back tracking. Not wild about the jump, I guess. Or maybe she'll ambush you later."

"She's beyond help, I think," Jayesh murmured. "Those Hive runes will alter her mind."

"Not sure what to do about that," Nell said. "Except cut her armor off. Which is really hard to do." She snorted. "Oblivion awaits. Yeah, right."

Jayesh shook his head slowly, his expression hidden behind his helmet. "Maybe I am blinded by the Light. But I know Darkness when I see it. I don't think Cadenza can tell the difference between them any more."

Grant sat in the floor as his ghost healed his ankle. His Exo face stretched in a grimace of pain as he pulled his ankle straight. "Sorry if I don't join in this discussion," he grunted. "Fascinating though it may be."

"Should he be feeling pain like that?" Kari asked, watching. "He's an Exo."

"Grant is the Romeo Charlie twenty-one hundred model," Nell said, kneeling beside him and nudging her ghost to help with healing. "Exos manufactured with a nervous system comparable to a human's. Never intended for combat."

"It doesn't hinder my fighting capabilities," Grant broke in, then drew a deep breath, as if trying to master himself. "Not usually."

Kari hadn't known this little fact about her teammate. She watched him and chewed a thumbnail. "Now I have Grant to worry about," she muttered to Neko.

"He won't appreciate it," Neko muttered back.

Kari pulled open multiple maps of the Dreadnaught, trying to locate this chamber. "How far down do you think you fell, team?"

"We fell for a full eight seconds," Jayesh replied. "That's probably five or six stories."

Kari found a map from the first Guardian expeditions. She glanced at the dates and wished she hadn't. The arrival of the Taken King, Oryx.

"My data is outdated," she said to her team. "This map shows that your chamber used to be part of a long corridor down the side of the ship. Can you break open one of those blocked doorways?"

"We can try," Nell said. "Stand back, I'm going to try grenades. Faster than kicking it." She stuck a glowing grenade to the bone-like mass filling the doorway. Grant scrambled to his feet and he and Jayesh backed to the other end of the passage.

The grenade detonated with a boom that shook debris from the ceiling. Smoke filled the room. When the smoke cleared, the doorway was blasted open, bits of blackened bone still clinging to the stone of the arch. A little light filtered in from the room beyond.

Nell peeked through. "Looks like another room like this one. Sealed off. Only ..." Her tone changed, dropping to a murmur. "Uh oh. Better have a look at this." She stepped through, drawing her sidearm. Jayesh and Grant did, too. Kari followed along, watching their camera views.

The first thing they saw were the crystals. Five crystals the size of a man, all but one long ago gone dark. One still glowed with a fitful purple light, surrounded by fluttering insects, attracted by the light in that dark place.

Dead Guardians.

As they gazed at this awful, yet beautiful sight, they noticed other things. Metal things on the floor, like flattened cages, ready to spring shut and trap a victim. Chains stretched across the floor with bodies still attached to them, long dead inside their armor, the crystals growing through their chests like immense spikes. On a ledge beneath the crystals, like so much garbage, lay a cluster of dead ghosts.

The realization of what she was seeing struck Kari like a punch between the eyes. She clasped both hands over her mouth to keep from screaming aloud. She curled forward, over the desk, eyes locked on the screens, pain tearing through her middle.

"Traveler help us," Jayesh murmured. "It's a tomb." He stepped over the old traps and stooped to examine the dead Guardians around the edges of the crystals. Two warlocks, one in the insignia of the Praxic Order. A hunter, the cloak rotted to shreds. Two Titans, both in heavy armor, thick with rust.

"The Titan marks," Kari choked, struggling to control her voice. "What are their marks?"

Jayesh stooped and touched the cloth attached to each belt, drawing them out straight to display the insignias. One was a howling wolf. The other, oddly enough, was the Warlock eagle. Titans didn't wear the insignias of other classes unless it meant something to them.

"Kari," Jayesh said quietly. "Was this Rem's mark?"

"He wore it for me," Kari whispered.

There was a moment of stunned silence. Jayesh touched his helmet and patted the spot where the camera was, trying to comfort Kari from a distance. She reached out one hand and touched the screen with her fingertips, meeting the outline of his hand with her own. If anyone reviewed this footage, it would merely look like he was adjusting his helmet. The gesture, so loving and yet so pointless, threatened to draw a sob to the surface. Kari held it in.

Jayesh tugged at the cloth mark, which ripped away from the belt in a puff of dust. He rested a hand on the dead man's helmet for a moment. "May your spark return to the Light, friend."

"That's Kari's first husband?" Nell exclaimed in her usual tactless way. "Oh wow, this sucks worse than I thought. Sorry, Kari. But hey, now we know what happened to him, right?"

"Nell," Grant said softly. "Show some respect."

"I am showing respect!" Nell protested. "Obviously we can't transmat the bodies home, but we can at least take their ghosts. There they are, right there."

She picked her way around the traps and chains to the ledge with the five ghosts. They were cold and dusty, each in a pretty, decorative shell. Kari recognized Trina at once - Rem had given her a shield shell in blue and black, with flecks of glitter that flashed in the light.

Nell picked up each ghost, cradled it a moment, then tucked it into the empty ammo pouch at her hip. "Poor guys," she murmured. "You're going home, now. In the Vanguard crypt, you'll at least be with other fallen heroes."

"What of this crystal?" Grant said, stepping up to the glowing one and waving away the moths. "This is the captured Light of this Titan, here. Disgusting Hive, growing a crystal straight through a living man."

Rem's Light was stored in that crystal. The source of his life and power. Possibly his soul, too. Kari stared at the crystal's glow, gripped by grief, and yet a powerful longing, too. That was all that remained of her first husband. If only the power could be forced backward, back into the remains at its base ... but without a ghost, Rem could not resurrect. He was dead, and yet not dead, his life trapped for decades in this last crystal, forgotten in a sealed room.

"We should destroy it," Jayesh said, still in that soft, considerate voice. "Release Rem's Light so he can be at rest. And ... if his spark is trapped ... he'll finally be able to return to the Traveler."

Kari couldn't speak. She kept her hands pressed to her mouth.

Behind her, a footstep scuffed against the floor. She looked up to see Commander Zavala standing behind her with his tablet, his expression stern. "Are you keeping your dialogue professional, Guardian?"

Kari struggled to swallow the lump in her throat. "My husband," she croaked, indicating the screen.

Zavala glanced at it. "Guardian Jayesh is accounted for, I see."

"No," Kari said, pointing at the crystal. "My first husband. They found him. The Hive ... harvested ..." Her voice broke and she covered her mouth again.

Zavala's eyes widened. He leaned forward, studying the screen. Then he backed away a step, looking suddenly awkward. "Yes. Very well. Carry on, Guardian." He moved away at a quick walk, as if embarrassed at himself.

On the screen, the fireteam was discussing what to do.

"Blow the thing up," Nell was saying. "Blow up all these crystals, I don't care if they're dark. They're sick."

Jayesh hesitated. "We ... Kari and I sort of talked about this. What it might take to charge Rose. I mean Lumina."

"Explain," said Grant.

Jayesh held up the flower-like gun. "It needs more Light to refine it into a Light conductor. I can use it for thirty years or so, and it'll charge off my Light. Or we can blast it with one concentrated dose. This crystal has all the Light of a Guardian inside it."

"Wow," Nell said, drawing the word out. "This is grossing me out. I don't know if you noticed, but Kari is bawling. I can hear her. You want to just charge your gun off her dead hubby? And you told me to show some respect."

Jayesh shifted his weight uncomfortably. "Well, I ... that's why I was going to ask, first." He cleared his throat. "So, um, Kari ... I know this is really hard ... Would it be all right with you if ...?"

Rem's Light could empower Lumina.

Kari's shoulders shook with sobs she desperately tried to silence. After so many years of grieving and wondering, there was Rem - his body, his ghost, and his stolen Light. Part of her wanted to scream for Jayesh to leave him alone, don't make him suffer any more torment. But his Light being trapped in that crystal was torment enough.

Lumina was a weapon of protection, of giving, of selflessness - the opposite of Thorn's selfish lust. Rem had always defended the City and those weaker than himself. It had been his duty and his joy, as he'd often said at the end of a long day. He would approve of passing on his Light, not to the greedy Hive, but to a fellow Guardian who would carry forward that legacy of protection.

Kari drew a shaky breath, trying to steady her voice. "Use it, Jay. For Rem."

"Stand back," Jayesh warned his team. He raised Lumina, its petals flashing white in the headlight beam, and placed its muzzle against the crystal. He hesitated for the space of a heartbeat. Then he pulled the trigger.

The crystal shattered in an explosion like fireworks. The Light inside it flowed into Lumina in the briefest of flashes - and up the conductive metal into Jayesh's hand. He gasped.

The bits of crystal plinked to the ground like broken glass, raining down on the corpse of the dead Titan to whom it had belonged. Lumina glowed white in Jayesh's hand, Light flickering and dancing over each petal and the Lightweave thorns.

To her surprise, Kari felt instant relief. The crystal was gone, Rem's Light freed. She watched the flickers of it playing over Lumina's barrel and suddenly wanted to laugh, simply to react to the horror of what had happened. "The Hive can't have you, Rem, baby," she thought. "You were powerful in the Light, and now Jayesh will use your Light for you."

"That did it," said Jayesh in an odd voice, turning his gun back and forth. "Kari, I'm ... I don't ... It's done. Lumina is empowered and ..." He coughed a little, as if trying to hide what he had been going to say. "Let's move out, team. Take whatever insignia you can from our dead brothers. We'll honor them when we return to the Tower."

Dead brothers? That had been one of Rem's pet phrases. Kari sat perfectly still, watching her team blast through another sealed door. Jayesh's voice had changed imperceptibly. His team didn't notice, but Kari knew every cadence of his voice. He kept shaking his head, as if trying to clear it.

She hurriedly pulled up the Vanguard database and searched for side effects of destroying Hive crystals.

"You noticed that, too?" Neko said in her head. "I had hoped I was hearing things."

There were plenty of entries about Hive crystals and Guardians avenging dead teammates by destroying them. Some Guardians had used them to charge their own Light in combat situations, usually only as an act of desperation. No mention of whether or not the dead Guardian's personality affected them.

"I think," Neko ventured, "if Jayesh just burns off the extra Light, the Rem part will go away."

Kari almost didn't want that. She wanted to hear those sweetly familiar words again. At the same time, she didn't want Jayesh tainted by the memory of Rem. So she listened to her team's chatter with awful mixed feelings, holding her tears inside.

"Yuck," Nell was saying. "The junk in these doorways is nasty. Hey, I'm picking up a ton of thralls on the other side. Go in with guns blazing?"

"I'll take point," Grant said, raising his rifle and stepping forward. "Jayesh, support."

"Got your back," Jayesh replied, making a half-salute with Lumina.

The team charged into the next room and were met by thralls and a towering Knight in bone armor, armed with a shield and sword. Kari watched her team struggle for a while. Then Jayesh drew on his Sunsinger powers to hurl fireballs in their enemies' faces, cutting down Thralls and shattering the Knight's shield. As his power faded, he laughed oddly. "You'd think the Hive would learn to avoid us by now, since all we do is kick their asses."

Grant shoulder-charged the Knight and fought it hand to hand. Nell sneaked up from behind and stabbed her knives through the chinks in its armor. Between their combined assault, the Knight went down, snarling Hive curses.

"That's how you do that!" Jayesh exclaimed. "Let's boogie, team. I am so done with this place."

Nell tilted her head to one side. "Jay, are you all right? You don't sound ... yourself."

Jayesh hesitated. "I'm ... well, I'm dealing with it. Come on, this way."

Kari silently uploaded her map to their ghosts and watched them navigate the cave-like passages, piles of worm filth, and slimy organic pillars. The Hive weren't happy to find Guardians in their breeding levels and attacked them at every turn.

Hours later, it was a tired, ragged fireteam that emerged on the upper deck.

"Well, on the bright side," Nell said, "we killed about three hundred more Hive than we were supposed to."

"All we need now is for Cadenza to meet us at our ships," Grant said, his voice modulated with weariness.

"I'd like to see her try," Jayesh said. "I mean ... I hope she's gone."

Kari checked their ghosts' passive scans. "No sign of her on radar, team. You're within transmat range of your ships. Head out and I'll end this mission."

She watched as her team successfully abandoned the Dreadnaught, settling into their ships with groans of relief. She marked their mission as successful, flagging their overkill numbers for consideration for extra bounty cash. Then she stretched and looked at the clock. Nearly four AM. She had time to grab a little sleep before picking up the kids.

As she rose from her seat, feeling stiff and emotionally wrung out, Commander Zavala approached. Kari mentally braced herself.

"Guardian," he greeted her. "I have observed your work from a distance. Despite the trouble your team encountered, you kept interactions with them to a professional level. I understand that this mission was ... difficult."

"Yes sir," Kari said wearily. She was too tired to mince words. "Am I in trouble, sir?"

"No, not this time," said Zavala with a rare smile. "You did well. I'm adding a commendation to your record. Dismissed."

Kari saluted, relieved and apathetic at the same time. She went home and slept until nearly noon, just to escape the grief and pain that lingered within her.

Chapter Text

Jayesh arrived home that evening, tired and reeking of the chemicals used in the decontamination showers - Vanguard policy for any Guardian with Hive contact. He briefly hugged Kari and the children, then went to shower properly and change. Kari followed him into the bedroom, curious and yet afraid to ask too many questions.

The first thing Jayesh did was pull Lumina out of its holster and hand it to her. "Do you sense anything?"

Kari turned the gun over and over. The perks within it seemed to make the weapon flash with life in her hands. She opened the cylinder and found that instead of bullets, each chamber was filled with swirling, glowing Light.

"What is this?" she asked, holding it up.

Jayesh was pulling off his grimy robe and boots. "I don't know. It was like that when I got back to my ship. I think it will fire Light projectiles, but I haven't had a chance to test it."

"Rem's Light?" Kari's stomach twisted.

Jayesh gave her a long, steady look. "It ... could be."

He tossed his soiled clothes down the laundry chute and went to soak himself in the shower. Kari went back out in the living room, feeling sick, a little panicky, and wondering if Jayesh was still part Rem. He looked like himself. His voice had gone back to the way he was supposed to sound. But she had no way of knowing what had changed in the inside, if anything.

As she stood there, musing about this, and trying to straighten out her thoughts, Stephanie toddled up to her. "Mommy, my stomach hurts."

"Point to it," Kari said distractedly.

Stephanie pointed to her middle. Then she bent over and threw up all over the living room floor.

This distracted Kari entirely from the Jayesh problem.

Kari hustled her daughter into the other bathroom, then cleaned up the mess, with Connor helpfully handing her paper towels.

"Reuben's mom was sick last night," Connor told her. "You think she got Stephanie sick?"

"Probably," Kari groaned, throwing the pile of soiled paper towels in the garbage. "You don't feel sick, do you?"

"No," Connor said. "Varan healed me."

His ghost appeared at his shoulder. "I did detect the early stages of a viral infection in Connor's body. Stephanie probably has the same infection."

"Great," Kari muttered. She washed her hands, then went to change her toddler out of her smelly clothes.

By the time Kari had Stephanie settled in bed with a bucket beside her head, Jayesh was hovering in the background, anxious. He immediately placed a small healing rift around her bed, lighting the room with muted blue Light. He leaned over Stephanie's bed for a while, smoothing her hair and singing a soft song in another language. He helped her throw up in the bucket when the next cramp hit, and cleaned up the mess afterward. Then he sat beside her bed and read her a picture book, keeping the healing rift going. Slowly the Light began to work, and Stephanie dozed.

Kari watched him, so full of churned-up feelings, she could barely speak. He was being a good daddy, but he had come home with someone else's Light, and might not be himself, but he acted like himself, and oh, she just wanted to hole up and cry for a while. A sick child and problems with her husband were simply too much to handle at once.

A few hours passed. Stephanie didn't throw up again, the healing rift finally taking effect. She sank into real sleep, hugging her toy ghost. Connor had gone to bed hours ago, lulled to sleep by the patterns of rippling Light on the walls and ceiling.

Kari and Jayesh stationed themselves on the living room sofa, where they could listen for trouble. Jayesh sat stiffly, half-turned, watching the bedroom door. "She's not a Guardian. What if the rift isn't strong enough? What if she gets worse? My little girl!"

"Calm down," Kari told him, rubbing his shoulder. "She's a little better already. These kinds of sicknesses are common among human children. Besides, your healing rift stopped the vomiting."

Jayesh wilted against her with a long sigh. "I didn't need this," he whispered, rubbing his forehead. "I need to talk to you ... and this happened."

"Yes," Kari said, turning to face him. "What happened to you when the crystal broke? Are you really Rem, now?"

He stiffened and stared at nothing for so long, Kari suddenly feared that she was right.

"When I ... when I broke the crystal," he finally said, his voice faint, "Lumina powered up like mad. I could barely hold it. It overflowed and ... I picked up the overflow. And I just ..." He hesitated and moistened his lips. "What discipline was Rem?"

"Striker," Kari whispered. "Arc Light."

Jayesh nodded. "That's what I felt. I was just ... invaded. For a second, I was this Titan, and I talked like him. It was like in a dream, when you're someone else, but you know you're still you."

"Are you still?" Kari asked. Her face felt paralyzed. She could barely move her lips.

Jayesh shook his head. "As soon as I used my supercharge, it burned off. Once we got back to the ships, Phoenix helped me sort of ... push the extra Light back into Lumina. Then I slept." He clasped her hands and tried to smile. "So ... I guess I met Rem?"

Kari could say nothing. She simply stared at him, at the way the blue Light in his eyes had faded to the barest glint. She was right - for a while, Rem had lived again. And now the remains of his Light burned within Lumina, filling the cylinder with Light bullets. She wanted to scream aloud, to burst into tears, to run away, to hurl Lumina off the City wall and watch it shatter as it hit the ground.

When her silence stretched on and on, Jayesh gulped and turned away, as if unable to meet her eyes anymore. "I think," he muttered, "I would have liked him. He seemed like a great guy. But all I felt was the imprint of his personality. His spark wasn't there. He's free, now. Gone to the Traveler, as a good Guardian should."

A hot lump of tears formed in Kari's throat. She really couldn't speak, now.

When she still said nothing, Jayesh turned to her, looking desperate. "Kari ... please don't let this change anything between us. I'm still me. Jayesh. I don't want to ... to tread on you and Rem. But I'm caught in the middle, here. If you want, I'll lock up Lumina and never touch it again. Or I can sell it. I don't know what else to do."

Kari opened her mouth, but her voice wouldn't work. Instead, she covered her face and sobbed.

Jayesh watched her, awkward, unsure whether to try to comfort her or not. When he touched her arm, Kari pulled away. "Don't," she whispered. "I can't right now. I need to get out for a while."

"All right," he said, springing to his feet. "I can watch Stephanie. Take all the time you need. It's fine. I understand." His words tumbled over each other. His whole posture pleaded for her to return, to not hate him, to please work things out. Kari took one look at his face, at the raw anguish there, and fled.

It was nearly midnight, and up on the Tower walk, it was freezing cold. The stars gleamed like chips of ice in the deep black sky. Kari welcomed the chill, welcomed the slap of cold air in her face and lungs. She set out at a walk out along the top of the wall, where the lights were few and far between. She found a shadowy spot, sat with her back to the parapet, and cried for a long time.

The stars slowly wheeled overhead. The City lights sparkled in the distance. The cold settled into Kari's bones, and she began to shiver. Still, she sat there, hidden, alone, racked by grief and fear.

Neko appeared beside her and swept her with a healing beam. Some of the cold ache diminished.

"You're not going to leave him, are you?" Neko asked.

Kari didn't answer. She couldn't. Right now, everything within her wanted to do just that - to run away and never return.

Neko's eye brightened. He spun his shell aggressively. "Kari. I know what's in your mind. You're afraid of more pain. Of losing Rem again. But you have to think about more than just yourself, here. Do you know what losing you would do to Jayesh? It would destroy him. Utterly and completely. And you would be destroyed, too, as well as your children. You just can't see it right now. The pain you fear right now is nothing - nothing! - to what would happen if you ripped your Light away from his."

Kari drew a shaky breath. "Is he Jayesh anymore? Or some hybrid of Jay and Rem? I can't ... can't face that, Neko. You know what losing Rem did to me. But having Jay's personality altered ... I'm such a coward. Of all things, that's the one I can't handle."

Neko paced back and forth in the air. "I'm asking Phoenix." After a moment, he turned to her again. "Phoenix says that Jayesh carried Rem's imprint for two hours seventeen minutes. It faded exponentially over that period of time, and it was purged entirely by loading it into Lumina." Neko hesitated. "He also says that Jayesh is positive that you won't come back this time. He's so tired and he's spiraling so badly. Very unworthy worm."

Kari pressed her forehead against her folded arms. "I heard him talking with Rem's voice," she whispered. "And now that's in Lumina. We've committed an atrocity, Neko. Rem is ... converted to a weapon. How can I ever look Jayesh in the face again, knowing that?"

"Didn't you listen to me?" Neko exploded, opening his shell and expanding into a sphere of angry blue Light. "Jayesh doesn't have Rem in him anymore! Rem's soul has passed on! You agreed to use his Light to empower that gun! Don't you put this on Jayesh! It was your decision, too!"

Kari scrambled to her feet, fists clenched. "Don't you dare yell at me, you little drone. I've just watched Rem die - twice. I know I'm being irrational right now - I need space to process this. I'm not going to leave Jayesh, all right? Tell Phoenix, if that makes you feel better. I just ... I just can't face Jay right now." She slumped against the parapet again and closed her eyes.

Neko's shell clicked as he folded himself back together. After a moment, she felt his slight weight settle on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear. "It's because we're linked, you see. I'm full of your pain. Phoenix is full of Jayesh's pain. It's bleeding over into both of us - double pain from each other's guardians. We just want it to stop. Ghosts aren't made for this."

Kari leaned her head against his cold shell and concentrated on breathing. Slow breath in, slow breath out. Calm the pounding heart. Slow the racing blood, the crazy thoughts. Slow breath in. Slow breath out. The Light is not fear, but love, and a sound mind. What's done is done. Rem is free, not trapped in a crystal. Nell brought back his ghost. We can have a real funeral. Let it go. You have a second husband who loves you more than the Light, itself. You're doing him a disservice, behaving this way.

Slowly the panic and anxiety calmed within her, the savagely tossing waves becoming a tranquil lake. She focused on that mental image, reaching for Light, drawing on the Traveler's generous gift to strengthen and restore her strained emotions.

When she next opened her eyes, a faint pink dawn illuminated the sky at her back, reflecting off the Traveler. Neko was asleep on her shoulder, his shell segments gone loose and relaxed. Somehow, she had fallen asleep sitting up while meditating.

She was stiff with cold, and her mind was clear. She had been out all night - Jayesh must be frantic. And Stephanie! How had she been so selfish as to abandon her sick daughter? Had she managed to sleep much? Had Jayesh sat up with her?

She struggled to her feet, staggering on numb legs. Neko awoke and flew into the air, blinking and settling his shell. "We spent the whole night out here?" the ghost mumbled. "Fail. Big fail."

"I'm the big fail," Kari muttered. "I was so freaked about Rem, I forgot everything else. Even Stephanie. Some mother I am. Message Phoenix, tell him I'm coming home."

Neko did. After a moment, he replied with a note of sadness, "He says Jayesh is going to dismantle Lumina. Once you're home, he's taking it to the mod shop. He's got a date with a sledgehammer, Phoenix says."

She envisioned the beautiful, Light-empowered gun on a concrete block. Then down came the hammer, smashing Lumina into twisted fragments, the precious Light wasted ...

"I don't think he should," Kari said. A half-formed thought about killing the last of Rem's Light passed through her mind. "Maybe I can talk him down."

"He's ..." Neko began. "He blames himself. And the gun. For hurting you. He's saying something about how this gun was for protection, and instead, it's hurt the one he loves most, so it's a failure."

Kari stood there on the wall, watching the sun's glow outline the blue mountains with gold. So much staggering beauty. And yet she was hollow inside. She turned and began walking back toward the Tower walk, trying to warm her stuff muscles. "No, it's not the gun's fault. It's mine, for being an emotional basket case. I hurt him. Light, I hurt him so badly last night. I know how sensitive he is, and I still just up and left. I am so stupid! I should have stayed and fought it out. Neko, you should have punched me. I'll make it up to him, I swear I will."

Her ghost halted. Kari walked on a few paces before she noticed, and turned to see him floating there. "What?"

Neko's eye had contracted to a dot, a sign of terror or surprise. For a second, he hung in midair, saying nothing.

Then Jayesh's scream hit her consciousness, relayed from ghost to ghost.

"KARI! SHE'S HERE!"

Phoenix screamed - the terrible, digital scream of a ghost, abruptly cut off. Kari felt his consciousness wink out like a light shutting off.

Then came pain. Phantom pain, transmitted across the neural link from Jayesh - a bullet just beside the heart and another below the ribcage.

For a fraction of a second, Kari stood paralyzed with horror, trying to grasp this. Then she was running - running with Guardian speed. True panic goaded her on - the full fight-or-flight adrenaline rush. Mako Cadenza had tracked them down. She was in the Tower - in the apartment - she had shot Jayesh and his ghost - the children would be next.

Kari leaped down the stairs without touching them. She couldn't think, couldn't plan - her goal was simply to get there. Her fingers curled into claws. Lightning began to flicker over her clothing.

Their apartment door stood open. Jayesh lay on his side, in a pool of blood, gripping Lumina. Cadenza stood a few paces inside, her back to the door, the jewels on her cloak flashing. Her filthy SIVA gun was trained on Connor and Stephanie, who had just opened the bedroom door and were gazing at her, curious and innocent.

Kari ducked, running on the balls of her feet, and tackled Cadenza with her arms around her waist. The two women crashed to the floor. The SIVA gun swung wide, the Light bolt blowing a hole in the ceiling instead.

Kari was powerful in her panic and mother instinct, but Cadenza's strength came from the Hive runes burning in her armor. She writhed sideways and kicked Kari off, her blows brutally strong. Kari's ribs cracked.

Kari rolled to her feet, snarling, and took a Light bullet to the stomach. She crumpled to the floor, the pain blotting out her senses.

"So," Candeza panted, climbing to her feet and turning to Jayesh. "You have a wife and children. A family man." Her helmet made her inhuman, impersonal, a monster on two legs. The jewels and gold on her gear glittered with a mockery of wealth. She worked an ornate, golden device strapped to her left forearm, above the gun. An energy pulse blasted outward. In Kari's head, Neko screamed. All sense of him faded.

"Don't hurt them," Jayesh gasped hoarsely. "Your quarrel is with me." He struggled to prop himself on one elbow, his hands smearing Lumina with blood.

"Don't hurt them?" Cadenza said, glancing toward where Connor and Stephanie peeked at her through the bedroom doorway. "The path of sorrow is about loss. Grief. Death. I have walked that path for many years. Let's see what you have to say about redemption when you are the one walking that path."

The SIVA gun raised to point at the children.

Kari reached for Neko, but couldn't sense him anywhere. No extra Light for a supercharge. No healing. Had Cadenza killed him with her device? The Shadow of Earth had come to murder them all - Jayesh and his family together.

Desperation and mother instinct combined to make her struggle to her hands and knees, pushing through the pain. With a snarl, she flung herself against Cadenza's legs.

Cadenza staggered, but didn't fall. The women grappled, kicking, punching, tearing at each other. Kari tore at Cadenza's armor with manic strength, trying to rip off the breastplate with its empowering Hive runes. She managed to loosen the shoulder panel that read Cunning.

Cadenza twisted away and kicked Kari in the back of one knee. Without armor to protect it, Kari's knee buckled and she stumbled. Cadenza didn't bother bringing her gun to bear on her. Instead, she rained blows on Kari's head with the barrel of the SIVA gun.

Each blow brought stars and blackness to Kari's vision. Each time, it took longer and longer to clear. Neko was gone. Phoenix was silent. Only Jayesh was left, and he was badly wounded. Kari had to fight, had to defend them all - she had let them down - this shouldn't have happened - Kari shielded her head with her arms. A savage blow broke her left arm, then her right. Kari screamed and doubled up.

Cadenza grabbed her by a broken arm, spun her around, and pitched her into the wall. Kari struck it sideways and slid to the floor, leaving a bloody smear. She lay on the carpet, still struggling to stay conscious, to keep fighting.

"And stay down," Cadenza panted, kicking Kari in the face. Kari's head jerked backward and her jaw cracked. Consciousness abandoned her at last.

Chapter Text

Jayesh had struggled to a kneeling position, weak from pain and blood loss, gripping Lumina. He crawled to put himself between Cadenza and the children's room. "Close the door," he whispered to them. "Hide."

Connor nodded, wide-eyed, and the door shut.

Cadenza had walked in and set off some kind of electromagnetic pulse that stunned his ghost. Phoenix lay behind the couch somewhere, out of battle, but unable to heal. Connor's ghost, Varan, was also out of commission. Jayesh was pretty sure the ghosts weren't dead ... pretty sure. The thought was a gasp of terror at the back of his mind.

Kari had come back in glorious rage, but Cadenza had been stronger. Jayesh was forced to watch as his enemy beat his wife into unconsciousness.

Jayesh had a healer's disposition. He loathed hurting other Guardians, and so was a terrible Crucible player. Everything about him longed to heal, protect, and strengthen. If Kari had behaved unprofessionally while watching him be hurt, for him, it was a thousand times worse seeing her hurt. He was his family's shield. He had taken up that mantle when Kari had gone on maternity leave to raise Connor. And he was failing. Cadenza had walked into their home, shot him, all but killed Kari, and was going to kill the children.

When Cadenza delivered the last kick to Kari's face, Jayesh snapped.

He raised Lumina, forgetting it wouldn't work against Guardians. Red fire clouded his vision and burned through him like lava. His Sunsinger song became a staccato drumbeat. Without his ghost, he couldn't draw on the Traveler for a supercharge. All he had was Lumina, and it would have to do the job. He had never wanted to kill anyone as badly as he wanted to kill Cadenza at that moment. He aimed at her smug face and pulled the trigger.

The Light bullet exploded into being as a ball of white Light. But it swerved in midair, avoiding Cadenza, and hit Kari, instead. It splashed over her in a wave of Light.

"No," Jayesh growled through clenched teeth. "Kill her, you damned gun!"

Jayesh fired again and again. Each bullet avoided Cadenza and sought out Kari, bursting over her prone body in flashes of Light.

Cadenza saw only that the bullets were missing her. She laughed. "Your weapon is pretty, Khatri, but it's useless. I was going to take it from your corpse, but there's no point to that anymore. You've defiled Thorn completely. I'm sure I can find some other weapon to take down sorrow's road with me." She aimed her SIVA gun at his middle. "But first, to incapacitate you. And then you may watch as I extinguish the lives of your children."

Kari fought the blackness, the pain, as if floundering in deep water. She was so close to the surface - she could hear Jayesh and Cadenza's voices. "Traveler, help me!" Kari cried out inside herself. "I have to save them!"

The first Light bullet exploded across her.

The pain ebbed at once, every wound knitting shut. With it came a familiar voice. "Hey, babe."

Kari gasped and looked around in that dream-place. She thought she was floating under water, the surface a few feet above her head, rays of light filtering down. Nearby floated Rem.

His smug, handsome face was just as she remembered, his dark hair setting off his devastating smile. He still wore his Titan gear, because that was how she remembered him.

"Rem!" she gasped.

He started to fade a little - then another Light bullet struck her, healing her further. The light above the water grew brighter.

"Hey," Rem said, "that Jayesh guy? He's a good choice. I wanted you to know that."

"You - you think so?" Kari ventured. She wanted Rem's approval worse than Light or air.

Another Light bullet struck her - Rem's own Light, stripped from his body decades before.

"It wasn't right, the way I left you," Rem said. "I couldn't help it, though. I'm sorry."

"I forgive you," Kari murmured.

Rem looked relieved. "That's bothered me the most all this time. Wondering about you. How you'd take it. I hoped you'd moved on, and I'm so glad you have." He began to fade again, but another Light bullet washed through her, mending bones and torn muscle.

"Rem," Kari said, reaching out a hand. "I've missed you."

He took her hand, his touch as warm as the Light, itself. "I've missed you, babe. Do me a favor. Let me go, all right? This isn't me. This is just my Light. I'm already safe and healed. Right now, a Shadow is after your family. Don't let her win."

"Never," Kari breathed.

Rem gave her a last smile, squeezed her hand, and let go. He drifted away into the sunbeams falling through the water, until he blended with them and vanished.

Another Light bullet struck her, but this one was not Rem's stolen Light. This was Jayesh's raw, burning fire, alive with love and hate and fear. He plunged into the sea beside her, aflame with Solar Light and blood.

"Kari!" he cried, holding out a hand. "I can't stop her!"

Kari seized both his hands, twining her fingers through his. "It's all right, heartspark. Give me your Light."

He did.

Jayesh slumped against the wall where he'd fallen after Cadenza shot him a third time. He had fired Lumina until the cylinder clicked on an empty magazine. The gun lay across his chest, the white metal stained red, useless.

Cadenza stepped over him to reach the door of the children's room. "Watching?" she said, turning the knob. "Good. I want to see the pain fill your eyes."

Jayesh was dying quickly, a roaring in his ears and black specks swimming over his vision. He'd tried to save his family with Lumina - tried and failed. He reached for Phoenix and found nothing, no Light, no voice. Then he reached for Kari, seeking her Light. She was there, alive, bright and alive. He almost thought he felt her clasp his hands.

"My Light, love," he whispered. "Take it all."

Across the room, Kari shot to her feet, robed from head to foot in roaring fire.

Cadenza looked over her shoulder and halted in the doorway. "Another Sunsinger? No wonder your fireteam is called Solarflare." She raised her SIVA gun and fired.

Kari dodged to one side like a flicker of lightning. Then she charged Cadenza in silence, electricity crackling amongst the flames. Cadenza fired again, but missed, and then Kari was on her.

Jayesh tried to watch, but death was too close. As his senses spiraled away, he sensed Phoenix in the distance, warm and friendly. "Hold on, Jay! I've got you!"

Kari gathered in Jayesh's Light, his battle song, his devotion and imposter syndrome and curiosity and drive to do the right thing. It came as fire, fueling her own lightning. The pain was gone and she didn't understand how. But right now, it didn't matter. All that mattered was stopping Cadenza.

Jayesh was nearly dead, slumped against the wall, where he had tried to protect the children. The sight of him like that, fighting to the last, sent a burst of love and pain through Kari's heart.

She slashed at Cadenza with fire and lightning. Cadenza fired at her with Void bullets that destroyed the floor, walls, and furniture. Some hit Kari and burned through her. But Kari almost didn't notice in her empowered state. All she wanted to do was wreck those runes.

Cadenza didn't protect them as she should have. Cunning was easy to blow off, as it was already loose. Next was Strength, burned out of shape and losing its meaning. False Truth shriveled away in a burst of lightning that burned across its lines, defacing them. Only one rune remained. Kari read it aloud.

"Madness," she said in the guttural Hive tongue.

"Read the rest, too, why don't you?" Cadenza said with a wild laugh. She shot Kari again, but it only made the fire swirl faster.

In the back of Kari's mind, Neko's voice exclaimed, "Hold her off! She can't kill me that easily!" Healing Light touched her wounds.

Cadenza looked down, then, and realized that her runes were ruined - except the last. "What have you done?" she shrieked.

"Madness," Kari said, stalking toward her. "The song is the same as the singer. Madness Madness Madness."

Cadenza screamed and grabbed at her ears under her helmet. "Stop it! Too many voices!"

"Madness!" Kari bellowed in her face. She grabbed the inhuman mask of a helmet and pulled it off.

Beneath was a human woman with fair skin and short blond hair. She had been pretty, once, but the Hive magic had sucked the Light and vitality from her face. She was haggard, dark circles under her eyes. Red lines of SIVA had crawled up her neck and left cheek.

"Madness," Kari said again.

"Stop it!" Cadenza shrieked. She doubled up and screamed, holding her head.

At that point, other Guardians burst in the door.

The entire fight had taken less than five minutes. In that time, Cadenza's bullets had punched through the walls, floor, and ceiling, disturbing the neighbors. They called Tower security, then converged on the apartment to see what was happening.

Still wreathed in fire and lightning, Kari moved to stand in front of Jayesh and the childrens' room as the other Guardians went after Cadenza. In a moment they had her on the floor, incapacitating her with stunning Light. They held her there until security arrived - warlocks in the black and yellow of the Praxic Order.

Kari finally let her Light fade, the battle tempo fading from her blood. She turned and knelt over Jayesh, still lying dead and bloodied, gripping Lumina. "Phoenix," she said under the hubbub. "It's all right. You can revive him, now."

The ghost phased into being, his red and yellow shell ticking back and forth nervously. Once he was sure it was safe, he opened his shell, expanding into a sphere of blue Light with his anxious eye in the middle. He pulsed healing Light into his Guardian, then resurrected him in an extra-strong pulse.

Jayesh inhaled and opened his eyes. He scrambled to his feet at once, looking around in confusion, groping for Lumina, automatically wiping it on his shirt. "What happened? Did you get her?"

"Yes," Kari replied, pointing at the figure on the floor, surrounded by the Praxic Order. "They're hauling her off right now."

Jayesh's hand closed tightly on her shoulder. Kari turned. He pulled her against him and hugged her, burying his face in the curve of her neck. "Kari," he whispered. "Kari. Kari." He pressed her against him as if terrified of losing her, one hand behind her head, as if trying to shield her from the enemy's blows.

"I'm all right, Jay," she whispered in his ear, stroking his hair.

He pulled away and cupped her face in his hand, stroking her jaw. "She hurt you so badly."

"I know."

His eyes were afire with unspoken words, searching hers.

"The kids are safe," Kari added. "I mean, I think they are."

As one, they turned to the children's room and dashed inside. Connor and Stephanie were hiding under Connor's bed, their eyes wide with terror. They crawled out, and they all sat on the floor with their arms around each other. Their three ghosts appeared and nestled close to their partners, apparently unhurt, but frightened.

"Who was that mean Guardian?" Connor asked.

"A very bad Guardian," Kari said. "She's going away for a long, long time."

There was a short silence. Out in the living room, the other Guardians were hauling Cadenza to her feet. The woman was still sobbing and clutching her ears.

"What did you do to her?" Jayesh asked softly.

"I defaced her runes," Kari murmured. "And then I read Madness over and over."

The children didn't understand this and gave her puzzled looks. But Jayesh gave her a wide-eyed look, half-afraid, half-triumphant. "I thought you had to read them in the original language."

"I did," Kari replied.

Jayesh slowly grinned. "You are an amazing woman."

Kari grinned back.

One of the Praxic warlocks looked in. She was a dark-skinned, severe woman named Aunor Mahal, well known for her harsh application of justice. Jayesh had run afoul of her once and had no desire to do it again.

"I need to take your statements," she said, her gaze roaming the disheveled little family. "One at a time, of course, to spare the children."

Another Guardian looked over Aunor's shoulder - Nell had finally arrived, followed by Grant. "Hey," she called, "want us to clean up this mess?"

"Please," Kari said, climbing to her feet and dislodging Stephanie. "Stay here, kids, I'll be right back."

Stephanie clung to her father and began to cry. Connor simply sat, pale and staring, clutching his ghost in his lap. Jayesh gazed after Kari with a forlorn expression. "Please come back," he whispered.

Kari's heart hurt her. She hadn't even had a chance to explain, to make up to him. And Rem had spoken to her - or some part of him. Jayesh needed to know. But first, the sticky legal issues.

Aunor Mahal questioned Kari and Jayesh by turns, her ghost recording everything. Aunor, herself, wrote down copious notes.

"Seems the so-called Shadow of Earth has fallen. Her treatment will not be easy. Between the SIVA and the Hive rune attached to her gear, she may simply die in rehabilitation. A sad loss. Her record was a long, good one. But even the strongest Guardians must take care--all that power will only make their fall more terrible, their corruption more complicated, their bad example more disastrous."

Meanwhile, Nell, Grant, and the neighbors righted furniture, had their ghosts mend broken items, and swept up glass. Someone sent for a cleaning frame. The robot arrived with carpet cleaning machinery and vacuumed the blood out of the carpet and off the walls. More frames came to repair the holes in the walls and ceiling.

As this was going on, Jayesh and Kari took the children out for a very long brunch in the Tower food court. Connor and Stephanie cheered up with the food and the sense of normalcy. Stephanie still picked at her food and only wanted to drink liquids, her stomach not quite well. But she and Connor devoured a plate of basbousa with delight.

Their ghosts floated close by, all three of them keeping watch. While the energy pulse had knocked them out, it had left no lasting damage. But the very fact that such tech existed had the ghosts on edge. Often one or all of them would fly to their Guardians for a quick, reassuring touch or a hug.

As the children worked on the slices of honey cake, Kari held Jayesh's hand under the table. "I'm sorry," she told him. "For running out on you last night. I was stupid and emotional. I fell asleep on the wall, and woke up this morning feeling like such an idiot."

Jayesh smiled wearily. "So that's where you went. You didn't come back all night, and I ... I had decided to destroy Lumina." He had stuck the weapon through the waistband of his pants. Now he pulled it out and laid it on the table. It was still smeared with dried blood.

"I tried to use it on Cadenza," Jayesh said, tracing one petal with a fingertip. "It fired these Light balls that homed in on you. I think ... did they heal you?"

"I think they did," Kari said thoughtfully. "I felt all these explosions of Light hitting me. Not the way a Ghost feels. More of a punch. But each time, it reduced the pain."

Jayesh grinned ruefully. "I made a gun that shoots healing bullets. And it harms enemies and helps teammates. But it wouldn't shoot Cadenza."

"It wouldn't heal her, either," Kari pointed out.

Jayesh kept smiling, tracing the gun's petals in a tired, dreamy way. "I'll still destroy it, if you ask."

"I don't want it destroyed," Kari said, squeezing his other hand. "It gave me a dream about Rem."

Jayesh's eyes met hers, startled.

Kari told him about the vision, recalling every word with a powerful sadness. It was too deep for tears, but at the same time, she wanted to laugh with the sheer joy of it - of seeing Rem one last time, of the sense of closure, and the permission to move on.

Jayesh listened with his head bowed, one hand on Lumina, the other holding Kari's hand. When she finished with his own appearance in her dream, he looked up, startled. "I showed up? The real me?"

"It was your Light, I think," Kari replied. "You must have used up Rem's Light and started firing your own. That's probably how it will work from now on."

"Huh." Jayesh opened Lumina's cylinder and looked inside. All the chambers were empty. He closed it again and laid the gun on the table. Then he gazed off into the distance for a long while without saying anything.

Kari poured the children more water and helped herself to a piece of cake before it vanished. When she returned her attention to Jayesh, he met her gaze with a small smile. "And here I thought you were done with me for good."

"Don't ever think that," Kari whispered. "I woke up this morning knowing what a fool I'd been. Then I heard you scream - and I got home and Cadenza was going to kill us all - and I realized how incredibly precious you are to me. No more running away." She smiled. "Because I'll always be afraid of someone breaking in while I'm gone, now."

Jayesh rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. "Is that the only reason?"

"Rem set me free," Kari whispered, holding his gaze. "It's done. I can move forward, now. With you."

Jayesh drew a deep breath and shut his eyes, as if holding back sudden tears. "I'd like that," he said, his voice cracking.

Kari passed him a piece of cake. "Here. It helps."

Jayesh ate it and gulped water afterward. "It does," he agreed, his voice much steadier.

They returned home that afternoon to find the apartment mostly put to rights. But Nell and Grant kept coming by to deliver odds and ends to replace broken items. Each time the door opened, Jayesh jumped to his feet, one hand on his gun. Connor and Stephanie ran to hide in their room. Their ghosts hid in phase.

This went on for the next week - the jumpiness, the fear of that door opening. Kari rearranged the furniture so every chair had a clear view of the door. Jayesh took to sitting where he could see it, even while working on his tablet. Connor developed a habit of locking the front door and every other door in the house. Stephanie clung to her mother and followed her everywhere.

Kari tried talking to them about it, but this sort of trauma would have to fade on its own. Instead, she quietly prayed for more Light. And to distract her children, she decorated the living room for the Festival of the Lost.

This cheered them up immensely. Kari talked about the costume dinner the Tower was putting on, drawing Connor and Stephanie's thoughts away from their dread of doors. She baked cookies and made various seasonal treats. This made Jayesh happy, too, as he helped himself to piles of everything.

One evening, as Kari was arranging the customary candles on the table, Jayesh asked, "Which one is Rem's?"

Kari hesitated. She had fifteen candles, all the same size. Usually, she had a giant one for Rem that acted as the centerpiece. But this year, she was using a colorful gourd as a centerpiece, instead.

"One of them is his," Kari said. "This one, I guess."

She turned to see Jayesh studying her with a quizzical expression, as if she was a puzzle he was trying to solve.

"What?" she asked.

He looked at the candles, then back to her. "You were serious about letting him go, weren't you?"

Kari went to him and put her arms around his neck. She gazed into her husband's troubled eyes. "He told me to let him go. And that you were a good choice. I'm trying to do that. I'll always miss him, but I don't have to ... to wonder anymore. If he made it to the other side. And that never would have happened without you and Lumina." She kissed him, slowly, letting him feel her tenderness.

Jayesh's arms tightened around her and he kissed her hard. "Thank you," he whispered. "Thank you for choosing me."

"I do," she murmured against his lips. "With my whole heart."

He pulled her head against his shoulder and simply held her for a moment, eyes closed in bliss. Kari stood there in his embrace, feeling herself relax and rest there. His Sunsinger aura seemed to permeate her with a joyful song she could almost hear.

When he finally released her, he wore an odd expression, almost shy. "So ... since we're friends again ... I have something to show you."

"You do?"

He picked up his tablet, opened a file, and showed her the screen. "I've been writing a book about how to use the Light."

After all this time, he was finally telling her about it. Kari beamed as she took the tablet. She scrolled through each chapter, which was neatly broken into categories and subcategories. Basic Light use. Intermediate. Advanced. Drawing on the Traveler vs drawing from another Guardian. Ghost relationships. Basic meditation techniques.

"I just finished the first draft this week," Jayesh said. "Sorry if I've been kind of distant, lately. This book has eaten up my brain. In a good way."

"This is amazing," Kari breathed, pausing to read various passages. "This is genius. You wrote all this?"

"Well," he hedged, "not all. I used about a hundred sources. My bibliography is in the back, see?"

"But you still put it together," Kari said. "Give yourself some credit, Jay. This is good. It's going to help other Guardians a lot."

He flushed and grinned, embarrassed by the praise, but eating it up, too.

"Can you send me the file?" Kari asked. "I want to read it after dinner."

"All right," Jayesh said, still beaming. He took his tablet and forwarded the file. Then he stood looking at the candles again for a moment.

"Thinking?" Kari asked.

Jayesh gave her a quick smile. "Just thinking of what we went through to make a gun that heals people. I think, in the end, it was worth it."

Kari slipped an arm around his waist. "I think so, too."

The End