Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“You’re my son you know. You’re a boy.”

Yuu stood frozen in fear and shock. Their mother stood in front of them, trying to deny the obvious truth in front of her. Yuu attempted to protest.

“I-I’m not.”

“What?”

Yuu’s mother stared them down in a mix of confusion and disappointment.

Yuu took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to sort out their words.

“M-mom I think I’m non-binary-“

Yuu’s mother shook her head. “No. No, no, you aren’t. You’re just confused.”

Her words stung Yuu’s heart. “I-I’m not-“

She cut them off again. “Yuuta, I didn’t raise you like this. You aren’t one of… those people.”

Each statement cut deeper and deeper. Her face never bared malice, only disappointment and shame.

“Yuuta, you need to stop believing in these delusions.”

“It’s n-not a delusion-“

Yuu’s mother cut them off again.

“As much as it pains me to say this,” She sighed, as though she found the whole ordeal tiring. “I can’t have my son being like this.”

She hung her head and pointed towards the door.

Yuu took a step back, cold fear washing over them. “Are you-“

“You can come back when you’re ready to accept the truth.”

She shot him a final pitying glance before leaving the room. As she left, she placed the final nail in the coffin.

“You’re my son, Yuuta. I don’t know what I did wrong. I don't know why you're broken like this.” With that she left, leaving Yuu alone in the room.

For a moment, Yuu stood frozen in fear. What were they supposed to do now? They didn’t have anywhere to go, they were without a home, they couldn’t get a job, they had no chance. Yuu doubted they could tell their mother they believed they were a boy, even if they did, they didn’t think their mother would accept them anymore.

Yuu took in a deep breath, trying to calm themselves down. Right now, they had to leave as soon as possible. Their grip tightened on the bag in their hands. 

Yuu glanced around the room, eyes landing on a pad of paper and pen left on their sisters desk. They picked up the pen, took a deep breath, and began to write.

Dear Izumi and Hikari

I'm sorry. Mom found out about the dresses and skirts.

I have to leave now, and I won't be back.

I love you both, and I'll miss you lots.

Don't come looking for me, I'll be ok.

Goodbye.

~Yuu

With their school bag on their shoulder and a blanket clutched tight in their arms, Yuu quietly walked down the street. They only had one spot they could think of going to. It might’ve been a Saturday, but the school was open for a few clubs. Yuu stepped on the school grounds and headed for the tennis courts.

Maybe it was a horrible choice, in fact it probably was, but in the blind haze of panic, Yuu thought it was as good a choice as any. 

Checking to make sure no one had seen them go in, Yuu entered the empty clubroom for the boys soft tennis team.

Yuu glanced around the empty club room. They took a deep breath, placed their bag on the ground, and unfolded the blanket.

It was still early, but Yuu was exhausted. Lying down on the cold ground, Yuu huddled under their blanket and drifted off into a fitful sleep.

As far as they were concerned, the clubroom was their new home. 

It honestly wasn’t that bad. Yuu would wake up early in the morning and hide their blanket in a locker. Then they’d go to school like normal, go to tennis practice, and eat with Maki, Mitsue and Touma when ever they could. On nights when they didn’t eat at Maki’s apartment, they simply didn’t eat. They were fine, things could’ve been worse. Sure, sleeping on the floor of the club room was a little less than comfortable, but at least they had somewhere to sleep. Maybe they only ate whenever Maki could cook for them, but that was pretty often, and Yuu didn’t really need that much food. 

As far as anyone on the team was concerned, nothing had changed. No one had to know anything was wrong, because nothing was wrong. They took great care of their school uniform, making sure not to get it dirty in anyway. They took it to a laundromat when they had to, using the small amount of money they managed to take before leaving to pay for it. 

Honestly, Yuu was pretty happy. As happy as they could be, given the situation.

It was less than a week before they were discovered.

Yuu sat at Maki’s kitchen table, scarfing down as much food as they could while still trying to be polite. It’d been 3 days since they’d eaten last and they were starving.

“Wow, you sure are eating a lot.” 

Mitsue commented idly.

Yuu blushed, looking away from Mitsue awkwardly. “I- uh, skipped breakfast.”

Technically it was the truth. They were just neglecting to mention that they’d been skipping every other meal as well.

Maki eyed them suspiciously.  “Yuu, it’s not healthy to skip meals.”

Yuu nodded. “I know.”

Touma gave Yuu a concerned look.

“Are you alright, Yuuta?” He asked. “Is everything ok with your family?”

Yuu hesitated just a fraction of a second too long. “…Yeah. Everything’s fine.”

They took a few more bites, not making eye contact with anyone else at the table.

Maki, Touma, and Mitsue exchanged glances over the table.

“Yuuta-“

But Mitsue was cut off by Yuu suddenly jumping up from the table.

“Oh shoot! I-I’m sorry I gotta go.”

“It’s still pretty early…” Maki said, checking the time on his phone.

“I know, I’m really sorry!”

They haphazardly pushed their chair in and pulled on their shoes.

“Thank you for the food, Maki! Sorry!”

And with a slam of the door, Yuu was gone.

Mitsue, Touma, and Maki stared at each other.

“So, that was suspicious.”

Maki nodded. “Well duh. The question is, what should we do about it?”

Touma shifted in his seat. “I say we leave it for now. We don’t wanna spook him.”

“That’s probably a good idea.” Mitsue agreed.

Maki hummed thoughtfully. “You’re right. I might call Yuu later though, just to see if he’s alright.”

“Call him when we’re done eating so we can hear too.” Mitsue said.

“Alright.”

The trio went back to their food.

Yuu sprinted down the street desperately trying to make it back to the school. The gates were going to be locked soon, and if they didn’t make it back in time-

With a final burst of energy, Yuu ran up to the firmly locked gates. They took a deep breath.

And began to cry. 

Their shoulders heaved as they reluctantly walked away from the school, and down the road. The tears kept flowing as every feeling they had been bottling up spilled over and splashed onto the pavement.

What were they doing? They'd gotten tangled up into such a mess. What had they done wrong? They just wanted to live happily. To be happy with themselves. 

Yuu made their way onto a bench, hugging themselves tightly, not even attempting to stop crying. 

Everything had gone so wrong so quickly. They were lost, with no idea how to even begin to get help.

Buzz~ Buzz~

Yuu scrubbed the tears from their face and pulled their phone out of their pocket. 

“Hey Yuu,” Maki’s voice came through the phone. “Are you doing alright? You left in a hurry and we just wanted to make sure you were ok…”

Maki trailed off. Yuu began crying again, loud enough for Touma and Mitsue to hear as well.

“Yuu? What’s going on?” Yuu took a gasping breath and stuttered through the phone.

“M-m-my mom… she… she found out. S-she kicked me out and now I don’t have anywhere to stay-“

Yuu’s words came out in a rushed breath as they choked back another sob.

“Yuu.” Maki’s voice suddenly became serious. “I’m going to come get you.

“I can’t ask you to do that, I-I’ll be ok, just-“

Maki’s voice left no room for debate.

“I’m going to come get you. Where are you?”

Yuu took a deep breath, and gave Maki their location. 

Maybe, they’d be ok if they got a little help.

It only took Maki a few minutes to get there, running up to Yuu with Touma and Mitsue not far behind.

Yuu’s face was still stained with tears and their eyes were still bloodshot.

Yuu stood up, only to have Maki envelope them in a hug before they could speak.

“M-maki, I-“

“Shhhh.”

Maki held them tightly, letting Yuu melt and sob against him.

After a few solid minutes of crying, Maki and Yuu split apart.

Maki grabbed Yuu’s hand and held it tight.

“It’s ok now.”

Yuu nodded and smiled softly.

Mitsue and Touma stood off to the side, unsure of how to respond.

Yuu walked up to them, wiping their eyes again. “I’m sorry for making you come all this way.”

They hung their head in a slight bow.

Touma tapped their shoulder. 

“Don’t be sorry.”

Touma was always awkward with things like this, but he hoped he was helping in some way.

Mitsue cut to the chase.

“What’s going on? You said something about your mom finding out? Finding out about what?”

Yuu hesitated, stepping back slightly.

“I-“ They closed their eyes. “I’ll tell you tomorrow, with the rest of the team.”

Maki squeezed Yuu’s hand. “Come on, let’s go.”

Maki lead Yuu back to his apartment, Mitsue and Touma following close behind.

Chapter Text

The boys soft tennis team sat on the small patch of grass they had claimed as their own. Normally they would’ve started practicing by now, but Touma had told them to wait. So they’d gathered on the grass and waited for him to tell them what else to do.

They had settled on a circle type arrangement when Maki broke the silence.

“Yuu, if you want to-“ He said gently, in stark contrast to his typical blunt nature.

Yuu nodded quickly.

“I do. I mean, I’m going to do it.” They squeezed their eyes shut. “I just need a minute.

They ran their hand back and forth against the uncut grass, watching the light reflect across the blades. They took a moment until, finally, they began their story.

“I have to tell you guys something.”

They hugged their legs to their chest, trying to calm their breaths.

Itsuki laid back nonchalantly.

“What’s up dude?”

Yuu tensed slightly, curling their fingers around a weed in the grass. 

“My mom kicked me out.”

The words were heavy on their tongue, but they forced them out with an air of finality. 

The reaction was immediate.

“What? Really?”

“Oh god, are you ok?”

“Why?”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Dude.”

Yuu raised a hand to quiet the group and continued.

“She caught me returning the skirts and wigs to my sisters. She started telling me I was a boy, I was her son, and she told me…” Yuu collected their thoughts. “She told me I could come back when I was ready to accept that.”

A funny sort of look crossed Shingou’s face. He leaned in closer.

“So then why didn’t you try to explain it was a misunderstanding or something?”

Rintaro nudged Shingou with his elbow.

“Don’t be rude!” He hissed.

Anxiety welled up in Yuu’s chest. They could do this, they just had to say a few simple words, and everything would be over. For better or worse they would know. Whatever happened next was out of their hands. 

“Because…”

They squeezed their eyes closed for fear of the others reactions.

“Because I’m non-binary.”

They kept their eyes shut tight, not even peeking at the team members. A deafening silence filled their ears.

“You’re non-what?”

“Is that like when you like boys and girls?” Nao asked.

“Nah,” Shingou answered. “That’s bisexual.”

Touma immediately turned to Maki.

“Maki?”

Maki scoffed.

“Why do you assume I would know?”

Touma stared him down.

“Well do you?”

Maki sighed, stretching his arms into the air.

“Well yeah, of course, but I think I should leave this to them to explain.” He looked over to Yuu, eyes still shut. “Yuu, you wanna explain or should I?”

Yuu opened one eye a bit, meeting several confused faces, but none of disgust. None of horror, none of fear, none of repulsion. 

“Well,” They began. “There’s people who are boys right? And people who are girls. But I don’t feel like a boy at all. And I know I’m not a girl. I look like a boy, but… I’m not. So I’m non-binary. Not a girl. Not a boy. Just… me.”

This was the end. Now that they had explained, Yuu was sure they’d be ridiculed. Cast away from the few friends they had. Told to get real, to stop being delusional, to get their head out of the clouds. They prepared themselves for the verbal barrage. Maybe a physical one? They didn’t think anyone on the team would get too violent with them, but really they should be prepared for anything. They gritted their teeth and prepared themselves for a good punch to the jaw. 

Instead, the felt themselves be wrapped in a hug for a second time in the past 24 hours. They looked down to see Taiyou, wrapping his arms around their shoulders in a fierce but supportive grip.

Taiyou looked up, meeting their eyes.

“Thank you for telling us.”

The rest of the team echoed similar sentiments, supportive smiles adorning their faces.

“We’re proud of you.”

“That took guts.”

“We’ll support you!”

“Cool I guess, as long as you’re happy.”

A smile broke out on Yuu’s face.

“Thank you. All of you.”

Their shoulder’s relaxed and they leaned back a little. Taiyou un-attached himself from Yuu, keeping a hand on their knee.

Everything went much better than expected and now they could finally relax-

“Wait.” Tsubasa interjected Yuu peaceful thoughts. “You said your mom kicked you out when she saw you with the skirts and wigs right?”

Yuu nodded reluctantly, feeling that anxious, uneasy feeling well up inside them once more.

“And you returned the skirts and wigs right after we went spying?”

Yuu nodded again.

Tsubasa stared dumbfounded.

“Dude. Where have you been living for the last week?”

Yuu blushed and looked down, mumbling something no one could hear. They fidgeted with the grass some more, trying to avoid eye contact.

“Yuuta, where have you been sleeping?” Touma asked with a voice of steel.

“I’ve been sleeping in the clubroom.” They confessed.

They were met with gasps of shocks and faces of upset. Taiyou lunged forward, wrapping them in another, even tighter, hug. 

Shingou jabbed a thumb over his shoulder.

“That clubroom?” He asked. “As in, where we change? As in a glorified storage shed? As in has nowhere to sleep but the floor and no source of heat? That clubroom?”

“It's not so bad.” Yuu attempted to downplay. “I mainly just slept there, I had a blanket I managed to take before…”

Yuu shivered slightly. Taiyou didn’t let go of them. The other members grouped around them, placing gentle hands on their shoulders or joining Taiyou in a hug. It was a huddle of compassion and care, the affection and acceptance Yuu had been lacking. 

“Hey Yuu?” Mitsue asked. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but why didn’t you just ask us for help?”

Yuu shifted a little but continued to welcome the embraces of their friends.

“I didn’t even think about it.” They whispered. They hadn’t even entertained the thought that someone, anyone would be able to help them.

“Do you really think that little of us?” Rintaro said, looking a tad hurt. “We would’ve done everything we could for you. We still will.”

That took Yuu by surprise.

“You would?”

Everyone nodded.

A sense of warmth and relief washed over Yuu.

“I- Thank you.” They breathed, voice choking up. “I never knew you guys… cared about me that much.”

“Of course we care about you!” Touma protested. “What have we done to convince you otherwise?”

“Nothing! It’s just… I’ve never had friends like you guys before.” 

“Well we’re your friends now!” Nao exclaimed. 

“Yeah, something as dumb as not being a boy isn’t going to get rid of us.” Itsuki pointed out.

Yuu sighed with contentment, surrounded by their friends.

“I want to go by Yuu now. It’s what Maki and Mitsue and my sisters call me. Or used to call me.” They said suddenly.

“You got it.”

“No problem.”

“Alright Yuu!”

“That’s a nice name.”

Maki cleared his throat.

“So Yuu, where are you going to live now?”

Yuu shrugged.

“I don’t know. I can’t go back home, so-“

“Would you maybe like to live with me? At least for a little bit?”

Yuu blinked in surprise.

“Wait really? I-is that ok?”

Maki nodded.

“I’d have to ask my mom, but I’m sure she’d be cool with it.”

“T-thank you, Maki!"

Maki reached over, joining the hug pile.

"No problem, Yuu."