Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Katsuki called him… actually, Katsuki called him lots of things. Nicknames included but were not limited to, Dumbass, Fucker, Dunce, Pikachu, Sparky, Casanova, Goldilocks, Buttercup, and Loverboy. In actuality, he felt honored that he got a range, unlike Kirishima. Eijiro seemingly rotated between three nicknames depending on the company they were keeping, the mood Katsuki was in, and whether or not Katsuki was trying to get laid anytime soon. On a sliding scale, it went from Shitty hair, Red, to Ei.

Furthermore, sometimes when Katsuki was in a more sarcastic mood, a Wonder Boy would get thrown in there as well.
Like the time they had watched, Kirishima tries to show off for them, and he had flipped into a poll. As soon as they were assured, he was okay; he was met with the fond tone Bakugou reserved for them, saying, "Splendid Job Wonder Boy." That's usually when they called Katsuki a nerd because that was absolutely a Disney reference. No matter what, he said.

Anyway, he was getting off track. Bakugou had lots of nicknames for him, but sometimes if he was feeling particularly sappy, Katsuki would pull his fingers through his hair and call him lightning bug. That fond smile back on his face and tone lighter than usual. It made him feel like he was walking on air when Katsuki looked at him like that.
Eijiro called him Sunshine. Even before they had started dating, he had jokingly called him that. And now in his second year of High school the 'Good morning Sunshine' he would get every morning with a peck on the head never failed to make his heart flutter.

He didn't know precisely when it had started, but god, it always made him feel warm and fluttery. Eijiro said that he reminded him of the sun. Bright and happy and golden.
He could remember afternoons spent with them just watching terrible movies and just existing together. He adored them with all of his heart, and that's why when they asked him if he wanted to do something today, he said no. They didn't deserve to put up with his crappy mood.

Because Denki Kaminari did not feel like Sunshine right now.

And they deserved sunshine. 

In fact, Denki didn't feel much of anything right now. He felt both numb and like exploding at the same time. The weight in his chest kept him crushed to the bed, despite the racing in his heart. The racing signaling his need to escape. To run and get out of here. Expect here was safe. Denki knew that. The same way he knew he was holding the loves of his life back. He was limiting them, and they would be so much better off without him. The voice in his head whispered such things often, but usually, he was loud enough to talk over it. He noticed how the voice sounds remarkably similar to his mother. She had always wanted to be rid of him and told him such.

Deep down, he wondered if Katsuki and Eijiro felt that too but didn't want to say it.

Kaminari shoved himself up and shook his head.

Because no no, no no, nO NO, NO NO.

And did he mention no? Denki couldn't go there, not tonight, not right now. He resolved himself to get up and get some water, get some air, do anything literally, but lay here. Denki had become good at running from his depression. When Denki reached his door, however, he paused with a fresh thought in his mind. Had he taken his Anti-depressants lately? Probably not, he figures and steps back away to rummage through his drawers looking for the small orange bottle. It was unlabeled, and Denki didn't know where his mother got it from, but he didn't really care like he did when she first started buying them.

He didn't take them anymore, but he used to always take them. They had made him drowsy and out of it, but he definitely hadn't been depressed, so he supposed they worked? Finding the small bottle of pills, he shoved it in the pocket of his oversized hoodie. Well, it was Eijiro's hoodie that fit just fine, but Ei had stopped complaining a long time ago. He reached his door again, and this time stepped out into the dark and quiet of the 3am UA dorms. He supposed everyone was asleep. He definitely hoped everyone was sleeping because he didn't know if he could pretend right now. He was just exhausted.

The soft ding of the elevator was the only sound that he could hear on his floor.

And it was also the only sound he could hear on the ground floor. No quiet whispers under the noise of a TV or shuffling in the kitchen. The loudest sound was probably his own heartbeat. As Denki reached the kitchen and then the fridge, he grabbed a water bottle.

As he drank, he realized how thirsty he was. He hadn't noticed how try his mouth had become until he had fixed it. He finished the entire thing.

Denki grabbed another water bottle before sitting down. He considered heading over to a chair or a couch, but honestly, it felt too far. He just wanted to sit down, so he leaned himself against a cabinet and dropped himself on the floor. He dragged his knees to his chest and felt the bruises from today's training.

He was never going to improve. He had known that for years now, but today it just hit harder. Much like Midoriya, whos hits kept getting stronger.

Denki wasn't strong enough to control his quirk. He knew it had the potential to be powerful, but all he could do know is act as a bomb. Loud and flashy and one time only because then he was a dead weight that slowed down everyone else. Eijiro had started calling his dumb phases, blackouts, and he did appreciate it. Some days just the fact that Eijiro knew and cared enough not to just call it his idiot phase meant a lot. At the same time, he hated that he had them in the first place because it's not like he needed help being a complete moron.

Denki felt his thoughts spiraling deeper and darker. Here he thought leaving his room would help him, but no, he actually felt worse. Which was great.

Denki took another swig of his water, hoping to stave off the headache that was rapidly approaching, and as he shifted, he was suddenly reminded of the pill bottle in his pocket.

Deep down, he wondered if Eijiro and Katsuki did want to get rid of him. He wouldn't blame him, he wanted to get rid of him.

He didn't know what happened next, it just felt like moving on autopilot and if it didn't even require that much conscious effort. There was a buzzing in his head, or maybe that was the AC in the building, he wasn't sure. However, Denki took one pill. Then another. Then he dumped them out into his palm and shoved them down his throat. There was nothing to chew, so the swallowing made his throat hurt with the amount going down. He felt his stomach shift and his throat ached.

And there was a drop on his hand.

Water.

He was crying over something as pathetic as him dying. Denki felt his stomach shift again, and a hiccup forced his way through his throat and out his mouth. And another. Along with more tears. Then came some giggles, so quiet, as to not bother anyone.

He wondered if he looked as deranged as he felt. A useless boy sitting and hysterically crying in the kitchen, he hoped he didn't wake anyone up. He'd hate to bother them with his mania.

Taking a few deep breathes, he found it harder to grasp each time he forced the tears to slow. Taking another drink of his water.

He was out again.

Just like he was out of pills.

Mostly anyway, there were a few scattered around him from his meltdown.

He tossed both to the side, as he felt a wave of exhaustion pour over him. His head felt like it was floating, and he felt cold on one side of his body. Though maybe that was because he had tipped over and was curled on the floor. He stared window and the dim light that the outside lampposts provided. They were bright.

He barely noticed the ding of the elevator.

Small dots began appearing on the side of his vision.

Then the muffled voice of someone speaking to the right of him. He almost wanted to look over at who it was, however, his body felt like lead.

The same muffling, this time he could he the concerned face of his teacher. He could almost hear the man above him say his name before he spotted something that obviously he didn't like. He stepped out of sight quickly and appeared to be bending over to

look at something.

The dots in his vision got bigger. And bigger. And he felt drained. His eyes fell closed, he felt his shoulder being shaken. Then nothing.

He wondered if his teacher would be happy that he was gone. After all, he was definitely a pain, so maybe this was for the best. Yeah, this was for the best.

Chapter Text

Aizawa was holding his student while he was dying. The boy that so often reminded him of his own husband was lying in his arms. Cold and unmoving.

He hadn’t been able to sleep that night, there was a pit in his stomach that kept him from resting comfortably. Not that he slept much in the first place, but it seemed the first time he was allowed to get some rest, his body was objecting.

Usually, he’d be in his own apartment not far from the school, but with Hizashi gone for the night on a quick mission, he didn’t really feel like he had an excuse to leave his kids alone. So, he set up to stay the night in the teacher’s dorm on the first floor of Class 2-A’s dorm. He knew some of his colleagues spent a lot more time living in these, but he personally had no interest in staying near his trash goblins at this time most days.

The blonde boy cradled in his arms; Aizawa’s mind raced. Its been a while since he had held someone who was dying. But not long enough. And like this. What is running through his student’s mind?

Earlier, he made finally decided that lying there in his own insomniac misery wasn’t worth it. He had shoved the covers away and decided to get an early start on the day. Grab the first cup of coffee, grade some work before making another cup to take to class. He definitely wished that his morning had gone like that. Annoying, but who cares when his student decided that dying was the solution to whatever was ailing him.

Distantly, Aizawa remembered holding Hizashi deep into the night. On the bad nights, neither of them would leave the other alone. Which had him thinking did Bakugou and Kirishima even know. Was he going to tell them that their boyfriend had tried to overdose? He was reminded once again that this school desperately needs a therapist.

When he had gone to get his coffee, he had heard the noise, though he hadn’t been sure what it was. It was an ugly hysterical sound, but then there was a quit, and he began to wander towards it.

He took in his student lying on the floor. Slightly curled around himself and laying on his side but mostly looking toward the ceiling. He didn’t seem to even recognize that Aizawa had entered the room. He had yet to brush off his exhaustion, however, so he stared at his student. His student with tears running down his face.

“Kaminari, what are you doing up?” He said, trying to be gentle, but he got no answer. No sign of recognition in the gold eyes and the only sign he was alive was the shallow breathing of the student. If his eyes weren’t open, he would assume that he was asleep. He stepped closer and peered over him.

“Kaminari?”

When he saw it, he felt his world freeze, and his heart plummets down to his stomach. A small orange prescription bottle tossed next to an empty water bottle. Taking a closer look, he noticed the chalky blue circles that surrounded his student.

He bent over to place a hand on Kaminari, and he saw his student’s eyes flutter. He shook his student shoulder as gently as he could for the panic that was welling up inside of his chest. The pounding he could hear practically in his ears stopped suddenly.

He got no response.

He was used to working under panic, so despite what he felt, his hands did shake when he called Chiyo. The older woman picked up slightly, cranky that her sleep had been interrupted but quickly changed her tone. She gave him some instructions and said she would be there soon. She was going to call an ambulance. A child of his was going to the hospital. Midoriya hadn't even been to the hospital recently.

He gathered the blonde up.

He gathered the blonde up to wait for the ambulance.

When Chiyo arrived, he could hear sirens distantly. Though he wasn’t sure if that was because they were still far or if the pounding of his heart was drowning everything out around him. The nurse hovered over Kaminari, but there wasn’t much she could do in this situation.

He was definitely sure that the ambulance was getting closer, then there was a voice behind him.

“Mr. Aizawa,” Iida looked concerned. The boy was still in his pajamas and didn’t even have his glasses on. His eyes widened when he was Kaminari laying limply in their teacher’s arms. He watched Iida open his mouth to speak only to have nothing come out. He can’t even tell what his typically loud and expressive student is thinking. “…Mr. Aizawa. What’s going on?”

And how does he answer that? He supposed he could tell him no bars held. His friend had tried to die and is going to the hospital. His friend is dying in his arms, and Aizawa doesn’t know how long he’s been like this. How much medication Kaminari had taken. His friend was going to have his stomach pumped because he didn’t want to be alive.

He didn’t say that. At least not like that. What actually came out was, “Kaminari is going to the hospital right now due to an overdose of an unidentified medication.”

The ambulance pulled up, and two people immediately got out. A man and a woman. The man ran right to him and Kaminari and took his student out of his arms. Aizawa had to force himself not to react when the man did. This was his job, Kaminari was fine. The woman opened up the back of the truck and got ready to settle the child down.

He didn’t look at Iida. Iida wasn’t a moron; he knew what had happened. Aizawa didn’t need to tell him. Aizawa was required to get into the ambulance with Chiyo and go with his student. Legally, he was Kaminari’s guardian.

“Someone else will be monitoring the class today,” Aizawa said. Then as an afterthought. “Can you take a look at the kitchen Iida. Make sure there’s no stray mess, and if you find any extra pills, throw them out.”

Tenya turned to look at Midoriya and Tokoyami. He doesn’t think Aizawa realized there was more than one of them. He didn’t realize there was more than one of them. Midoriya looked like he was trying not to cry as the vehicle pulled away. Tokoyami looks blank. He just looked empty.

He had woken up to the sound of sirens. Tenya didn’t sleep as deeply as he used to, so the sound causes an amount of panic that he had quickly talked himself down from. Until he looked out the window and saw Aizawa and recovery girl standing there, unmoving and not talking to each other. He heard the ambulance approaching and so he went to head downstairs to them. He had ended up taking the stairs instead of the elevator for speed. He turned on his engines and was suddenly just behind Aizawa.

Behind Aizawa, who had ended up holding one of his friends. One of his friends who had tried to overdose. More importantly, one of his friends who he never expected this from. Not that he expected it from any of them, but Kaminari was all dumb joke and smiles. He was made up of 90% sunshine and made around him feel better. How did he miss this?

He quietly guided his friends back inside. Tokoyami walked ahead of both of them, but he had to place a hand on Midoriya’s back and lead him. They all stopped at the couch.

“Someone should wake up, Kiri and Kacchan,” Midoriya said. It was the first thing any of them had said. Tokoyami and Iida looked at him silently, so Midoriya immediately started stuttering.

“Yeah, your probably right,” Iida found himself saying.

“I just- if it was Shoto, I’d wanna know.” Midoriya stared at the ground and fiddled around with his hands. Tokoyami nodded slightly. “I can… I can talk to them.”

Midoriya slowly stood up and began to head up to the elevator. He should get up too. Aizawa had asked him to clean up the kitchen. He needed to do that. It was what? 4 am?

He should do that. Walking into the kitchen made him feel nauseous, for practically no reason.

He grabbed the broom in the panty to sweep up a couple of blue dots scattered on the floor.

Izuku didn’t know why he had volunteered for this. In the past year, Kacchan had become one of his best friends, so there wasn’t a threat of violence. He hated that he had to do this. As a hero, he would have to be able to do this. Be ready to comfort people when their loved ones were dead. Not that Kaminari was dead. Izuku shook his head and pounded on the door before he could change his mind.

Izuku knew that both Kirishima and Kacchan were crashed in Kacchan’s room. He knew they would wake up when they heard the door because no one in the hero course ever slept deeply anymore. One of them would open the door and-

The door swung open. And Kirishima stood there. His hair was pulled back, and he wasn’t wearing a shit and overall looked like he had just woken up.

“Mido? God, it’s earlyyyy-” His sentence got dragged out in a whine followed shortly by a yawn. Kirishima scratched his head and leaned against the door frame. “What’s up, dude?”

Izuku wasn’t sure what made him break, but suddenly tears were streaming down his face, and in a choked voice, he managed to get out, “I-Is Kacchan… Is he, like, awake right now,”

Izuku wouldn’t even pretend to be manly right now. Tears just kept falling, and Kirishima also attempted to comfort him. Izuku quickly shook him off, shaking his head and giving him a weak smile. He saw Kacchan approach behind Kirishima and wrap his arms around the redhead’s waist. Kacchan dropped his head on his boyfriends’ shoulder, and Kirishima placed a hand on the top of his head.

“What do you need at Fuck o’clock, nerd?” Kacchan’s voice faltered with evident exhaustion when he saw the tears.

And finally, Izuku just forced it out.

“Kaminari tried to kill himself.”

Chapter Text

Chiyo Shuzenji had been a hero first. She was still a hero. She was Recovery Girl. She could deal with situations under pressure and hold her own. And despite her best efforts, this wasn’t the first time she was seeing a child dying. A child that Shota had not wanted to let go of, for fear something worse may happen to him. A child that had to be strapped down to an Anti-quirk table due to violent spasms of his own body. The EMT told them that seizures are something that could happen in an overdose. That they would be at the hospital in less than 7 minutes and would perform a Gastric lavage.

The EMT also said that the seizures are likely made worse by the child’s quirk. Kaminari already had an unnaturally high amount of electricity in him, and the sudden burst of electrical activity was definitely affected by that. But they couldn’t be sure how at the moment.

The fact that they didn’t know what he had taken didn’t help. Still, as they pulled into the emergency section of the hospital and two employees opened the door to get their new patient, she forced herself to worry about the students back at the dorms. Iida,

Tokoyami, and Midoriya who had witnessed their classmate and friend being placed into an ambulance.

Chiyo knew plenty about watching friends being put into ambulances, and it never got better.

She and Shota were led over to some seats in the waiting room.

“You should text someone to cover your class.” She said to Shota. He had bags under his eyes but still stood alert while she began to sit. He nodded and pulled out his phone. He paused and stared at it, not even turning it on. Finally, letting out a deep sigh, he looked at where she was sitting and joined her. Chiyo looked over at him.

“What’s on your mind?” She asked him. She knew this was weighing on him. She wondered and briefly tried to remember if this had happened before.

“I didn’t know,” Shota said, looking at her from the corner of his eye. “I’ve worked with students showing signs of depression, PTSD, suicidal thoughts… I didn’t know.”

“He reads the same pamphlets you do. He knew what not to do if he didn’t want to get caught. What signs not to show,” Chiyo said slowly. She knew that look in his eyes, the one that said he had already convinced himself that this was his fault. Those were the eyes of the teacher that nearly killed himself for his students. Shota leaned back against the wall and slumped. “Shota, we’ll do better next time.”

“We should have don’t better this time,” And he was right. There was no disputing that.

“We should open an investigation because we need to know where that medication came from. And why wasn’t it registered with me? When the dorms were opened, did you meet his parents.” Chiyo knew that they had to have signatures from parents. She also knew she should probably reach out to said parents.

“Yeah, I met his mother. She was something.” Shota looked over at her and her curious face and continued. “She opened the door and stepped outside before I even knocked and asked for the piece of paper to sign. She had him with her. She then signed it against the back of Kaminari’s head, handed it back to me, and slammed the door in my face.”

“She sounds lovely,” Chiyo muttered.

“Precisely, but when I asked him about it, he said I had caught her in a bad mood,” Shota said, letting the sentence trail off as he lost his train of thought. “I should call ‘Zashi and Nemuri.”

Sero was angry. That much he knew. He wasn’t sure what at though. He thinks maybe it’s the situation because it doesn’t make sense to be angry at Kami. His friend should be sitting diagonally from him. Chatting with Mina about after school plans or making heart eyes at Kirishima behind him or Bakugou behind Jiro. He wasn’t, though. He was in the hospital. And there was a blank space where he sat and quietness in the room he usually filled.

The class hadn’t started yet, but everyone was in their seats anyway. There were some small attempts at small-talk around him that sounded too forced to be enjoyable. He’s sure everyone knows by now. Those that didn’t know when they had walked in had been informed by someone almost immediately.

So immediately, they had barely begun asking everyone what was wrong before being shushed. Because if the class is quiet, the Bakusquad was damn near silent.

Kirishima, the classes second sun, was hunched over on himself. He was better than before, as Kiri no longer had the tears in his eyes. However, he still looked like he would break any second. Mina was on her phone. To an outsider, it looked like she was probably texting or playing a game or anything. She wasn’t, though. He had seen her search before they both sat down.

‘Signs of depression.’

Sero supposed Mina was looking for answers. Maybe that was the way of dealing with the grief. Dealing with not knowing. Because they hadn’t heard anything. No new information, since Midoriya had pounded on Katsuki’s door at fuck knows when in the morning, and Kirishima had told them to come to their room as soon as they woke up. Mina and Sero had woken up to their phones, going off and come immediately. Jiro had come later.

Jiro looked like a wreak. And that was him being polite. Her eyes were puffy and red, and her normal atheistic as an untouchable punk was definitely thrown off by the state her clothes were in.

Bakugou just looked exhausted. Sero was sure he was, but it was a different kind of tired. A deep set, bone-deep tired. No one spoke to him, likely afraid of setting him off, but Sero knew nothing could set him off today. Sero had never seen his friend like this, and he hated it. It made him feel angry.

Now he was back where he started. And then Miss Midnight choose to walk in.

“Good morning, I’m sure you have all heard…” Midnight said, “I have news.”

Sero noticed that she didn’t specify what kind of news.

‘Denki Kaminari went to the hospital from a suicide attempt, can you cover my class?’

It was a short text that shot panic through her heart.

Nemuri sent back a text saying, of course, and went to get ready for teaching a class earlier than usual. Though teaching may be the wrong word, she doubted any of them would be in a position to learn. Glorified babysitting, really.

She also wondered how the class was doing. After all, the blonde was a vital part of the class’s morale. This morning she chooses to forego the hero suit in exchange for more casual clothing, she browsed through her closet looking for something to wear.

Then paused and sent another text to Shota, beginning a short conversation.

‘Keep me updated, so I can tell your class.’

‘worried?’

‘Obviously’

‘of course.’

She let a slight smirk across her face.

And as much as she hoped for some good news before class, she put her phone to the side to continue getting dressed. A watched pot never boils and all that.

After a quick breakfast, she left her apartment and headed for work. She made sure to send a quick test to Nezu, letting him know the change as she walked. She didn’t live too far from the school after all.

She reached the campus at the same time as some of the class 1-A students, though she didn’t bother them. They didn’t need that right now. Kirishima and Bakugou walked hands gripped tightly in the others near the entrance to the school. She had seen this before only usually there was another blonde making both of them smile.

Ashido and Sero wandered behind them in similar states of quiet. It was almost unsettling to watch overall. This group was always bursting with energy, and now they were silent. She didn’t blame them, though. She was scared for too, and she was sure that they wanted nothing more than to be at the hospital waiting for Kaminari.

It wasn’t until she was down the hallway from the classroom that she got the text.
‘The seizures have calmed down, and they were able to pump his stomach. They used some activated charcoal to absorb the rest. He’s currently asleep and under observation. Long story short, he’s stable.’

Nemuri let out a breath she barely knew she was holding.

Chapter Text

Katsuki called his blonde boyfriend… actually, Katsuki called him lots of things. Nicknames included but were not limited to, Dumbass, Fucker, Dunce, Pikachu, Sparky, Casanova, Goldilocks, Buttercup, and Loverboy. Eijiro rotated between three nicknames depending on the company they were keeping, the mood he was in, and whether or not he was trying to get laid anytime soon. On a sliding scale, it went from Shitty hair, Red, to Ei.

Nicknames were almost a part of his personality by now. It had started with Deku, and even now that they were no longer insults, they were still thrown in there. There wasn’t even anything wrong with his boyfriend’s names like Denki had asked once at the beginning of their relationships. He supposed they were just intimate and saved for special occasions.

Katsuki let him mind trail.

Like when Eijiro pinned him down against his own and made out with him till he was out of breath. And when he was red-faced from having been kissed so hard that he couldn’t remember his own name, he found the only name on his tongue was Eijiro. He had whined for Eijiro as he pulled him closer, and the smirk from the Redhead was the only thing Katsuki could like about for hours afterward.

Or better yet, the time that Katsuki and Kaminari had just been lazily kissing waiting for their other boyfriend to come back with the dinner Katsuki had ordered out for them that night. That night neither of them had any plans and were new to their relationship. Then Denki had straddled his waist and leaned over till he had been right above Katsuki's face. And Denki’s name had come out of Katsuki’s mouth in a growl causing the blonde on top of him to shudder. The smaller blonde had quickly been flipped off the top, and what Eijiro had come back to was something that ensured Kaminari’s concealer was put to excellent use.

Anyway, he was getting off track. Katsuki had lots of nicknames for him, but if he was feeling particularly sappy, he would pull his fingers through Denki’s hair and call him lightning bug. Katsuki had always liked the way Denki’s eyes sparkled when he called him that and the short giggle that followed.

Katsuki swore up and down that he would call him Lightning Bug as many times as Denki liked if his boyfriend would just wake up.
Eijiro was leaned up against the bed with his head against the mattress, breathing slowly. Despite that, Katsuki was right next to him; he could barely hear the soft breathing over the sounds of the machines that guaranteed his other boyfriend’s status in the land of the living. Since Eijiro had never styled his hair, Katsuki let his hands run through his bright red hair with one hand. That way, he had a grip on both of them right now.

Denki’s hand wasn’t near as cold now than when he initially began holding it. His hand, like the rest of the other blonde, right now had been next to freezing. Almost uncomfortable to hold. Like he had been standing out in negative degree weather. Negative degree weather like the hospital room he was in. Katsuki had always run slightly warm, but even he was cold now after he and Ei had spent almost 2 hours.

And Katsuki hated hospitals.

Katsuki had hospitals a lot. He hated feeling weak, he hated seeing those he cared about weak. Most of all, though, he hated the atmosphere. Now, after almost 2 hours, he hated the sound of the damn heart monitor. The only good thing about that damn heart monitor was that it just kept beeping. And beeping.

Honestly, if he thought he could, he would definitely join Eijiro in sleeping. They both had been up for a long time. Not to mention the day had been tiring in more ways than one.

Physically, because he and Ei chose to spend all of the day ignoring the rest of the class. Mainly they had decided to work out. During breakfast, they had gone for a jog and just grabbed a granola bar. During lunch, they had gone to the gym and spotted each other while they lifted. During the free period that had been English, they had gone back to the gym and sparred.
It would have been pretty quality bonding time if it wasn’t for the fact that neither of them had pretty spoken during it. And not the ‘I’m angry, so I’m not going to speak to you’ kind of not talking. Just an awkward 'not quite sure what to say' kind of not talking.

Either way, Katsuki he’s almost entirely sure that he had been holding or touching Eijiro practically the entire day. He doesn’t remember it or making that decision to do that, but he’s almost sure it's true.

Emotionally, because everyone wanted to know if they were doing okay. Everyone except Deku had taken turns asking him or Eijiro, "How they were doing?" And every single time to told them to fuck off. He was mostly happy it hadn't spread outside of the class. None of them needed that right now. Not him, not Ei, and certainly not Denki when he got out.

After school, the entire class was ready to run over after hearing he was stable and in a room. The doctors had looked pretty shocked for a moment; however, their teacher hadn’t. The man had met them all in the lobby and take them up to Kaminari’s room.

The doctors had simply said to be quiet when they went in, similar to every visit to the hospital their class did.

Maybe his class went to the hospital too much if he thinks they made outings the damn hospital like they were field trips.

Anyway, they were quiet, though. Unnaturally so, no one had really known what to say at that point. Everyone had hung out for about an hour, though, finding things to do or whisper about. Katsuki is reasonably sure that between the class, Todoroki, and
Momo, they had bought the gift shop downstairs. Or at least the giftshops yellow and gold stock. Katsuki almost wants to ask if, as a class, they had decided on a theme. Every card, stuffed animal, flower, snack, all were bright sunshine yellow.

Either way, after about an hour, Recovery Girl, had taken all of them back to the dorms. She had tried to convince them too, but Aizawa had simply shaken his head and told him it wasn’t worth her time. Before stepping outside on a phone call 20 minutes later.

He still wasn’t back.

However, Katsuki could hear the conversations that were happening. Aizawa was on the phone with Present Mic. Then Recovery Girl. Then Present Mic again. Then Denki’s mother. Who, if judging by the tone, Aizawa had developed by the end of that conversation he had not liked. Not that Katsuki would blame his teacher, he didn’t exactly like his future Mother in law either. Nor did he like the black and blue watercolors, she would occasionally paint on her son. There was absolutely no doubt in his mind where Denki had gotten the medication, and he had told Aizawa so.

Finally pulling his hand away from Eijiro hair, he poked at the Pikachu stuffy that Mina had brought for him. The shiny black eyes had him almost as angry, and anytime Deku had spoken to him in middle school. He could quite pin down why it made him so angry, and he likely would have stared it down forever if it wasn’t for a raspy voice that snapped him down of his trance.

“Kit Kat, I never thought I’d have to say this, but you can’t throw down with a stuffed Pikachu,” Half lidded golden eyes stared up at him with a barely their smile. And not for the first time since he had entered UA, he felt tightening in his throat and tears creeping up in his eyes as he kissed Denki’s forehead. He just let himself stay there for a moment.

God, in his heart he knew he was going to marry the two idiots he had right now. They were literally his sun and stars. If either of them asked, he would give them the damn universe on a platter. They made him a better person, and he was so fucking in love with them; it terrified him. It terrified him that he had almost lost one of them. Almost lost Denki against a battle against himself. Right now, when Denki smiled at him, he felt this weight lifted off of him. His heart skipped a beat when he had smiled at him. He allowed himself to pull away from Denki and just look into the other boys’ golden orbs.

“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t fucking do, Lighten Bug.”

Chapter Text

On mornings like this, Eijiro usually dragged Katsuki out for a run. He would also stop by Denki’s room with Katsuki and also fail to convince him to come with, but that was all right. They got their good morning kiss. Last time, Eijiro had skipped a run on a gorgeous morning like this was when Katsuki was kidnapped. Even if he hadn’t been dating them at the time, Katsuki’s kidnapping ate at him, and he hadn’t been able to drag himself out of bed to run alone.

Today, he did want to be alone. Not because he didn’t want to be with Katsuki, but he needed to clear his head. He wanted to be able to process the past 24 hours. So, he ran near the hospital in the gym clothes that Katsuki brought for him when he had gone back to the dorm in the morning. Beside, Eijiro’s back hurt from sleeping in a chair all night, so moving was probably good for him. That was at least how Katsuki convinced him to leave Denki’s room. Either way, he went and was told to be back in an hour, and Katsuki would buy breakfast.

While all things considered, it was a good run, he was happy when he got back into the cold air of the hospital and waved at the woman in the lobby. She had seen him leave and gave him no bother when he walked back in and towards the elevator. Once he had been deemed stable by the doctors, they had transferred Denki from an emergency care room to a standard hospital room to wait for him to wake up.  He and Katsuki had crashed in two chairs next to the bed, while Aizawa had been in and out. He had been talking to nurses and on his phone for most of what Eijiro saw of him. If Eijiro was honest, he doesn’t think their teacher slept. If Eijiro was doubly honest, if Katsuki hadn’t threatened him, he doesn’t think he would have either.

He wandered through the hospital and took in how quiet it was on this floor. It was still rather early though only 7 am. And while all three of them were usually awake at this time for school now, the plain white and dull colors around them probably didn’t make anyone particularly motivated to do much of anything.

Finally, though, he turned into the room and was faced with Denki wide awake. Though not entirely paying attention. The blonde was aimlessly staring out the window, seemingly oblivious. Most importantly, be looked better. His skin was no longer quite so pale, his cheeks were rosier, and god Eijiro kept coming back to the fact that he was awake. Denki hadn’t even been out for long all things considered, but Eijiro still stood in shock before bursting into a grin.

“Morning Sunshine, how long have you been up?” Eijiro looked at his newly awakened blonde boyfriend. He had been slightly startled by being snapped out of his trance but smiled back at him none the less.

When Eijiro had woken up, Katsuki had told him he missed Denki, the other blonde had gone back to sleep shortly after waking up the first time. At first, Eijiro had been disappointed, but now he was kind of glad. He’s not sure he would have been able to keep himself emotionally stable yesterday, but he felt alright.

Never mind. Eijiro felt the tears slip down his cheeks, and his throat tighten. Then there was a hand on his face, wiping away his tears. It was the same slender hand that always wiped away his tears. He always comforted him when he needed it and held him close when life got hard. He pulled the hand away and placed a kiss on Denki’s wrist. He took in a deep breath and dried his own tears.

“Don’t do that, babe. I’m the one who’s supposed to be comforting you this time. You’re always comforting me,” He said, moving his grip till he was holding Deni’s hand and not his wrist. He felt the grip tighten momentarily as a bright smile was directed at him. “You don’t have to do that either. The whole pretending thing. It’s alright for it not to be okay, you know.”

Suddenly, he wasn’t the one crying. A waterfall of tears spilled over Denki’s ruddy cheeks and ran down his face. They dripped off his face and onto his lap for the few moments that Eijiro had been frozen. Soon though, he shook it off and shuffled closer, pulling the blonde into his chest and letting his shirt get soaked. He found he didn’t really mind at the moment as he ran his hand up and down Denki’s back in what he hoped was a soothing motion.

And while he barely heard the door open, he did fell the weight settle beside him and the second pair of arms around Denki. He watched Katsuki gently card his fingers through Denki’s hair and pull his head back to kiss his cheek. He watched his typically aggressive boyfriend whisper softly into the other blonde’s ear while he held his hand. And he observed in his boyfriends silently signal to ask, because they had to know. Eijiro leaned over to them both and placed a hand on Denki’s cheek.

“Baby, what happened that night?” Eijiro said, already wiping away the flowing tears, mentally Eijiro scolded himself for the asking. He shouldn’t push right now. Denki shrugged and curled against Katsuki, pulling off the oxygen machine that had been in his nose. Just as he had a nurse fluttered in to scold him about touching it, though she didn’t have him put it back in. She ran some tests, checking his vitals on the machine off the side of the bed, and Aizawa walked in not long before she finished.

Aizawa looked over Denki with the watchful glance of someone who had been dealing with teenagers for a while.

“How are you doing today?” Their teacher asked quietly, and Denki opened his mouth to respond, then closed it. He looked down at the sheets thinking through an answer to a question that you get 17 million times a day. Eventually, though he gave up, Eijiro would never know what answer he had been trying to search for. Denki gave their teacher two thumbs up, and a weak smile, and Aizawa didn’t press. Just nodded and walked out with the nurse. It was a lie.

Denki Kaminari wasn’t okay, but Eijiro and Katsuki would make sure he was as close as he could be.

Chapter Text

Denki Kaminari wasn’t okay.

But you know what.

He was getting there

It was 6 months later people stopped watching him like he was going to kneel over at any second. Or like he was going to break down suddenly. Mina and Sero told him he didn’t need to be the idiot all the time. That he didn’t need to make, people smile all the time. That he was worth more than that, and they would prove that to him. Needless to say, there had been tears in that conversation.

It was 6 months later, and Denki was on actual medication for depression. It wasn’t a blue pill. They had tried one of those, but he had refused to take it. This was a yellow pill, kind of like the sun that Eijiro always said he was. At first, he had felt stupid for taking the medication. That he shouldn’t need drugs to be normal, but that opinion had adjusted after a conversation with Midoriya.

“I’ve taken medication for anxiety since I was 12,” he had said as he watched Kaminari take his pill. Apparently, the look on his face made his feelings evident. It was the first time they had run into each other at recovery girl’s office to take their medicine, now though they walk together every morning.

It was 6 months later, and Kaminari went to therapy sessions every other week. He had recently gotten Todoroki and Katsuki to both have sessions of their own. Denki didn’t actually hate therapy. Ms. Kawasaki let him vent and let them both get off-topic. She let him cry about his mom and gush about his boyfriends. She had taught him strategies to cope, and when he didn’t want to talk, they played Uno. He usually lost at Uno. Mr. Aizawa had told him that the therapist was for his depression, but when he got papers from Present Mic detailing his transfer in guardianship over to UA, he knew there was more to it than that.

It was 6 months later, and sometimes Denki wasn’t okay. Sometimes he had to force himself to get help on the bad days. Remind himself that no one was going to judge him. Sometimes Katsuki and Eijiro held him late into the night while he allowed himself to simply exist. In those days, Eijiro would still ask him if he wanted to go running. The answer was still no, but Ei brought him back a coffee.

It was 6 months later, and Denki Kaminari wasn’t okay.

But really who was?

He was happy, and he thinks that’s okay enough.