Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was Sly that approached James first, the rest of the group watched in avid horror as James tore into his fifth large packet of cheese puffs in the last half hour.

"Uh, James?"

James looked at Sly as he crammed another handful in his mouth, crumbs and orange powder clung to his beard in a very unattractive fashion.

"You feeling okay, man?" James looked at him confused, then actually looked embarrassed when Sly looked pointedly at the empty packets on James' station then back to James.

He finished chewing then looked down at his half-empty bag, "they're really good..." He huffed then set down the bag, getting up and walking out the room. He was gone two seconds before he returned, grabbed his bag, then left again. They heard the main office door open and close, singling James' departure from the entire building.

Aleks sat quietly and didn't say anything while the rest of the group debated someone going to check on him again. James had been moody around the house lately and this morning they had gotten into a huge argument because Aleks didn't put his bowl in the dishwasher after breakfast.

After a few rounds of rock, paper, scissors the fates decided it would be Jordan that would brave James and his cheese puffs next. The rest of the group moved en masse to the window with the best view, Aleks trailing behind them. James was sitting out under a tiny tree, moving his thumb furiously over his phone screen while his other hand dipped in and out of his bag.

They couldn't hear anything but they watched as Jordan approached James, stood for a few seconds then sat down next to the huffy non-teen. They talked for a bit, Jordan's brows furrowed in seriousness until James appeared to swipe the palms of his hands over his eyes. Jordan wrapped his arms around James, letting him press his orange-flecked face into his shoulder.

"Shit dude, this must be something serious," Sly remarked quietly.

After five minutes most of the group had dispersed back to what they were doing before James' outburst, with only Sly hovering near the window.

The main door opened and everyone in the stream room perked their heads up. Jordan was alone with no James in sight. He motioned Dan out the room and spoke quietly. Everyone strained their ears to hear but to no avail. They walked back in and Aleks was just about to ask where James was when Jordan spoke to the room, "I'm going to take James home, behave while I'm gone!" He tried to put in a big grin but it was false and too wide. He left again with a small wave to the room.

Aleks and Sly rounded on Dan for answers but Dan just shrugged and decided to be very busy in his office.

Aleks texted James a few times but each time his texts went unanswered. It was a long ass day but eventually be finished his work for the day and headed home. He felt anxious and nervous, which was crazy, he had no reason to be nervous over going home. Yes James was being a little grouchy but Aleks figured cracking a few PMS jokes and breaking out the alcohol would cure everything. He even stopped off at the local corner store and picked up another extra large bag of cheese puffs as a peace offering.

What he wasn't expecting was Jordan's car to still be parked outside or the sound of Toy Story to greet him when he opened the door. He toed off his shoes and crept in, hanging his keys on the hook and dumping his bag next to the stairs.

His brows furrowed in total confusion as his brain screamed WTF at the sight of James sound asleep, his head burrowed into Jordan's shoulder with a thick blanket over him.

Jordan looked up as he heard Aleks' feet padding across the floor. Wordlessly he carefully shuffled James off of his shoulder and slid up from the sofa with James barely rumbling.

Aleks whispered "thanks" as Jordan squeezed his shoulder and picked up his keys.

After Jordan had left Aleks took his space on the sofa, wrapping his arm around James to pull the elder closer. He let himself be absorbed into Toy Story until James mumbled against his hoodie, so quiet Aleks almost missed it.

"I'm pregnant."

Chapter Text

"What?"

James sat up a little to look at Aleks. He looked exhausted and pale.

"Pregnant," James repeated, looking solum, "doctor thinks I'm the third in America. Odds of one in four million."

Aleks knew about the first few cases, they had been reported in Europe first then Australia a few years ago. A rare mutant gene had evolved in men that allowed for a womb to form above the bladder. The bladder of the affected men thickened to allow a placenta to attach to it so the child could grow. It had boggled Aleks's mind at the time.

"Are you being serious?" Aleks hoped he was kidding. That it was all an elaborate prank and that Dan would burst out with his camera any second now while Sly cackled.

The look on James' face told him his hoping was hopeless.

"I need a minute..." Aleks got up and walked to the kitchen. He leaned over the sink and breathed deeply, his windpipe feeling constricted and his chest tight.

His first instinct was to grab a bottle and laugh it off, but he knew that wasn't the answer. So instead he put on the kettle and with shaking hands he made two hot chocolates. Once they were ready he carried them to James and sat them on the coffee table, giving James an attempt at a smile, holding up a finger indicating "give me a second" before disappearing out the room, rustling around, then re-entering with the big bag of cheese puffs and scooting back down next to James.

"Don't hog the blanket," Aleks grumbled, tugging at it until they were both covered and cozy.

"Thank you," James sighed, his voice shaking as if he were close to tears again. Aleks just kissed his temple and opened the cheese puffs, holding them out to James.

"Don't think I'm gonna treat you like a princess for the next nine months, this is a once-in-blue-moon deal."

"Five and a half," James corrected him quietly. When Aleks just stared at him he sighed heavily, "I'm five and a half months. And don't call me a fucking princess, asshole."

Aleks smiled his first real smile all day. Which, when he thought about it, being called an asshole would be a really weird reason to smile to most people.

They restarted Toy Story and munched on the bag between them, sipping at their cups. If they silently decided not to talk about the small issue growing in James then that was okay. They would have plenty of time to talk tomorrow.

Chapter Text

James knew Aleks was staring, and he wasn't even being subtle about it.

"Dude, can you like, not?" James groaned as he pulled on a big tshirt, "I'm not, what's the word? You can't see anything,” James waved his hands up and down over his still mostly flat stomach.

"Showing," Aleks supplied for James as he swung himself off the bed, "you will though... When're you gonna tell the guys?" Aleks padded over and pecked James on the lips before starting to dress himself.

James shrugged and pulled on a pair of jeans, "Soon? Today? When I've had the thing? Man I don't fucking know, they don't even know we’re together yet," he tugged at his hair in frustration.

Aleks almost rolled his eyes as he reached up and slid his hands under James', making the elder look at him. "Jordan knows, right?" He already knew Jordan knew, James had told him the previous night about how he'd been unsure and Jordan had taken him straight to a doctor to be tested. James nodded his head.

"Good, that just leaves Sly, Dan, Seamus and Dex, right? At least for now?" James nodded again. He imagined Kevin would probably know soonish as well as Bek and Spencer but the group mattered first.

"We'll tell them today, get it over with," Aleks decided, taking the decision out of James' hands. When he got a last nod from James he smiled and pressed a reassuring kiss to James' lips. James' hands slipped down to Aleks's belt, hooking his thumbs in the loops to pull him closer.

Aleks stumbled a little into James but it hardly phased them as James sucked lightly on Aleks' bottom lip, his beard scratching lightly at Aleks' chin. James had just got a hand on Aleks' ass when the phone rang.

"God fucking damnit," James cussed as he stepped away from Aleks and grabbed the phone off it's cradle, “what?" He growled down the line. His face softened a little bit and Aleks could just make out the tone of Jordan’s voice, but the words were lost.

Aleks make a vague gesture of drinking from a cup to James, their universal sign for coffee in their house. James gave him the thumbs up so Aleks left him to talk.

Once James was done talking and they had been fed and caffeinated they hit the road. James had told Aleks that Jordan was just calling to see if they would be at work that day. When James said they would be, Jordan decided an informal meeting in the break room would be best if they wanted to tell everyone at the same time.

James fidgeted in his seat as Aleks drove there, feeling nervous and too warm and uncomfortable and still a little turned on from before Jordan rudely interrupted them.

It was all happening way too fast for his liking, yesterday he had just been really into cheese puffs and a little grouchy, today he was telling his best friends that he and Aleks did the do and tomorrow he was going to a fancy ass clinic so some doctor could rub gel on him and talk about vitamins.

Aleks pulled up and parked and together they walked hand-in-hand into the offices. They didn't often hold hands in public, or show any real signs of affection at all outside their house. Partly because they knew fans would see and it'd be all over Tumblr in two seconds. But also because they weren't really affectionate, not in the soft, sunshine and rainbow way the fans liked to draw them in.

James showed his love for Aleks in the smile when he called him an asshole, in the way he'd deliberately breathe against Aleks neck in the morning until Aleks cracked and turned towards him, all frowny faced and ruffled bed hair. Almost always those mornings ended up making them slightly late for work.

Now James clung to Aleks' hand, feeling slightly lost and childish while he tried not to be overwhelmed by everything. Tim from the office across them passed as they were about to enter their block. He glanced at their hands and smiled at them, not commenting as he walked into his own office them.

That eased James' mind slightly, if Tim didn't judge them then his friends shouldn't either.

Of course he was unprepared to walk into the stream room and be hit in the face by confetti as the sound of a klaxon and poppers threatened to deafen him. He squinted his eyes open and saw a large congratulations banner hung above the TV, everyone in the room holding popped poppers.

Except Sly. Sly was holding Chef, the poor pup was wearing a bib and an old fashioned baby bonnet.

"Jordan you asshole," Aleks turned on their leader and tried to glare at him, but the relief he felt was making it hard not to smile.

James just tried not to cry.

Dan zoomed in on James' stomach, "And that, baby, is you. You can't see you yet but you're in there somewhere," he narrated to the camera.

"What the fuck are you doing, Dan?" James hissed as he tried covering his stomach.

"He's making a video diary for the kid," Seamus cut in, extending his hand for James to clutch as they did their bro-hug thing, "congrats man, I'm never babysitting."

"I, on the other hand, am completely down for babysitting, and teaching it how to hunt in the wild," Jordan interjected, "hope you guys don't mind, I called an early meeting, thought I'd take a little bit of stress off you guys," he explained.

"Thank fuck," James exhaled, looking considerably lighter than he had before he walked in.

"Sly, I don't care," Aleks said a little loudly from the side of the room where they had been talking, "the baby will not be getting called China Prime, or Eddie, or anything else you come up with!"