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English
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Published:
2022-02-14
Updated:
2022-02-14
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1,764
Chapters:
4/?
Comments:
46
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47
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KEEP LIVING

Summary:

Ryan Tanner's untimely passing affects all of his friends, family, and past
loves in many similar, and dissimilar fashions. Some (Like Andy) feel guilt
even though they themselves played no part in the shooting; PRUITT HERRERA'S
MEDDLING is horribly remorseful: his manipulation of the facts of his impending
death to convince the Young Man to return to his hometown and re-start his 'romance'
with Andy, even though he's (Pruitt) well aware that his Daughter is love with another Man
[Sullivan] places him as a direct causal factor in the tragedy.

A Pregnant Jenna, in town for the funeral, may well remain in
Seattle. The 19, and the SPD, rally to support her.

Notes:

Chapter 1: FRIENDLY FIRE-s19

Summary:

Andy seeks comfort from her friend Vic (non-sexual) Season 3 'Indoor Fireworks'
+ 'Eulogy'

Notes:

I've updated this chapter and re-written parts of it.

Chapter Text

"Hey Ands..why so blue? Ohhh-RYAN?" Victoria Hughes asks her friend softly.

"I feel...a little guilty: just before that Little Boy shot Ryan, he told me that he came back to Seattle for ME...and now he's DEAD, and I-I...
feel responsible, somehow. I knew him since age nine, y'know?" We dated in high school, hooked-up here-you know the story...it's going to
take a long time if ever, to recover from this. Robert has been so understanding, and patient. he's been my rock." Vic widens her eyes and starts
to open her mouth, so Andy interjects, "YOU TOO; I thank God I have you to lean on too."

"Great save...just under the wire!", Vic jokes. "I never could figure out just what it WAS with you and Ryan? You mentioned that the sex was
good, the chemistry, and the 'familiarity' of him helped; I don't recall you ever saying you were in love with him... at least, not to ME."

"No...not IN LOVE...well, I loved him-LOVE HIM-as a friend, as the boy I grew up with, the one who's been there. He's been in love with ME forever,
it seems, and I'd told him a little while before that I'm in love with Sullivan. He joked about it, but I can tell it hurt him. I wonder if that's why the guilt:
I didn't fall in love, and he wanted that."

"Not one of us can control who we fall in love with, you know that. That wasn't healthy, whatever that was with Ryan. I give you credit for the way
that you broke it off when you did not return his feelings so that he could move on, or try to. Not stringing him along is the best thing you could
have done."

"About THAT...I contacted Jenna, and it turns out that he lied, Ryan did. She never betrayed him with someone else: the one who convinced
him to come back to Seattle: PRUITT HERRERA took a trip to up to SD, convinced Ry that there's a chance for him and I; leaves out that I'm pregnant
with Sullivan's baby...he just refuses to stay the fuck out of my life, and in a way, it's HIS FAULT that Ry was even here. He's been ducking me, but I will
let him know...you can bet."

Quietly, Hughes says "Survivor's guilt?"

"It could be...he pushed me to one side. He protected me. And now he's gone." Herrera starts to sob.

Vic suggests that she call Sullivan, let him know that she's staying at Ripley's overnight. She herself contacts her husband, Lucas to advise
him of their overnight guest.

"Hi, Baby...me quedo aqui con Los Ripley...me siento muy trieste...esta bien, lo puedo hacer? OK, te llamo en la madrugada...íya sabes que
te amo /em>? OK...'bye." (I'm gonna stay with here the Ripley'sI'm really sad...is it okay with you? OK, I'll call you in the morning...you know that I
I love you).

When Vic returns Andy says "He's fine with it. HEY... your dad isn't like that with you, is he? Over-protective, controlling? I met him and he seems
really cool."

"He is kinda cool. I didn't see much of them growing up: it's taken years just to get Kamisksy's to where it is, which still isn't where it would be if..."

"If Daddy Anthony and Mama Lenva had not been a Black man married to a white woman," Andy interjects quietly.

"RIGHT. WAIT : you call my Dad 'Daddy Anthony' and my Mom 'Mama Lenya'?"

Andrea shrugs. "I thought everyone did."

"Want me to lay down with you for a while-until Lucas comes?"

"That'd be good. Thanks."

Chapter 2: AFPLAC (ASS-FACED PEDOPHILE LOOKING ASSISTANT CHIEF)

Summary:

When..Claire died, I didn't take time to grieve,
much less come to terms with it. Do that, then
come back to the job. Your position is secure.
Once you have gone through the five stages-TO
-COMPLETION come back and we'll start our plan to
get you to Captain.

 

 

 

Andy returns to the home she shares with Robert Sullivan, and the
air is cleared

Chapter Text

"I wasn't WITH HIM-not the way that I'm with you." This is Andy's response to Robert's
saying how he understood why she needed some time with a close friend who knew
Ryan Tanner personally, and understood her grief. He'd actually said: "No problem. I under-
stand that you were with him a long time..of course your sense of loss is especially profound.

"You 'UNDERSTAND' that I was supposedly with Ryan a 'long time'; from whom do you suppose
this incorrect information? Hmmm?"

"I've overheard conversations at the '19'. People who've been in that station long enough to know."

"Then you misunderstood", she retorts. "I lived next door to Ryan from age nine until I left for
college. Yes, we dated through most of high school. And YES, we hooked-up for awhile when I
came back from school, and joined the FD. He was FAMILIAR, a dependable sounding board
who I could talk to about my problems with my Dad, losing my Mom-he'd also lost HIS early
in life-and rather than risk my heart and health by jumpin' in with the creeps and losers populating
the Seattle dating cesspool, he was familiar-someone I could trust. Once you and I decided to be
together, he met someone, and moved to San Diego. He was in love with me, it seems, and has
been for a longtime, I guess...but once I fell in love with you, there was chance for he and I. I
told him the night he was killed...before the little boy...that I never, ever felt before what I feel
for you, and I could see in his face that those words broke his heart. Then...you know. Part of
why I feel so badly is he never got the chance to LIVE, put 'he and I to rest', return to his life
with Jenna. He was only 32." She slumps back onto the couch, seemingly exhausted by her speech.

"You need time to finish processing this, yes? Your friend's passing?", Robert offers, gently, taking
a seat beside her.

Gazing at him tearfully, she nods yes.

"I know because for years after Claire died, I couldn't even acknowledge that fact, or say the words
'Claire died'...for years anyone connected with the accident was to blame, in my mind, including
first responders-including my BEST FRIEND."

"The Chief."

"Right. I didn't take time to grieve, much less come to terms with it. Do that, then come back to the
job. Your position is secure. Once you have gone through the five stages-TO COMPLETION-come
back and we'll start our plan to get you to Captain. I promise you that I'll find a way. The new AFPLAC
won't be here long, but he's pressuring me to appoint a Captain. jack is till struggling, and rather
than bring in someone new, with everyone still so raw...I'm appointing MAYA. I'm stepping up to
BC; tat way I can manipulate things to our favor more easily.

Despite he disappointment at this news, Andy is uplifted by the codicil that he'll find a way to get her the
deserved promotion; she has to admit that she really is NOT ready. His logic is SOUND. Promoting her now
would end in disaster. She smiles for the first time since returning home. "AFPLAC"?

"ASS-FACED PEDOPHILE LOOKING ASSISTANT CHIEF"

"You are SO WRONG FOR THAT-NOT NICE! ! And...I'm more in love with you than ever, for looking out
for me, and protecting me from myself...are we okay?"

"1000%. And it may not be NICE, but it's ACCURATE."

Chapter 3: JENNA MATSON TANNER

Summary:

Jenna (Matson) Tanner is 90% committed to
remaining in Seattle.

Chapter Text

In two days-THREE, at most-Jenna Matson Tanner is preparing to deliver
her deceased Husband's child (either Michah Ryan Tanner, or Rynna Jenna
Tanner). Her Mother, Su Li (Sue) arranged a rental home for her and the baby
(her Dad, Dan Matson, remained in San Diego...once the baby is delivered, he'll
be in Seattle for at least a few days.) One question the new Mother has put off
considering is whether she'll return to the SPD. Dan Matson was against her
joining the department from the beginning, and he's offered her a VP position
in his company, alongside her Brother, Peter). The way that Ryan met his end is
swaying the young woman in the direction of working for her dad. The Chief of
Police has already met with her to re-state that the entire department is behind her,
and that if and when she desires to return, all she need is to say the word.

Sue Matson has not been unclear about her feelings on the matter: "Jenna: you have
a child to consider, now-OUR GRANDCHILD-and his/or her safety is primary, as well
as yours, of course. Please, PLEASE think carefully about your next steps. Neither I nor your
Father is trying to interfere in your life...but we you are vulnerable now...still grieving, and you
will be for some time." After a short pause, she adds: "When your natural Father passed away,
it took me years to recover...then Dan came into our lives, healed us. One day, you will love again.
But complete your grieving process first...yes?"

"Yes, Mommy. I know that you're right. I just wanna have this baby; one I have him or her in my arms,
I really believe that the healing will begin. And I will take the time. You and Dad have been so helpful,
and I appreciate it....getting this 7 pound BOULDER off of my kidneys is all that I can think about now!"

Mother and Daughter chat about Sue's three childbirths, and what Jenna can expect in the next 48-72
hours.

Chapter 4: SO HAPPY

Summary:

Victoria Ripley
'Vicley's Baby'

Chapter Text

Lucas Ripley is not as affected by Ryan's passing as his wife is. He met him a few
times peripherally, and was impressed by his professionalism and enthusiasm for the
job he performed. Vic appreciated the distraction he provided for Andy while she kept
searching for the actual one , the one who'd win her heart and soul-Robert
Sullivan...the wait, the search; well worth it-Vic can attest to that. Once Ripley entered her
life, she'd known within the first five minutes that this Man is who she's been waiting for.

The boozing, the borderline 'puta-ish' behavior (Andy's word-meaning sluttish, not 'hooking');
all that vaporized as if it had never been: Victoria is Completely, Thoroughly, Intoxicatingly in
love, and she loves being in love...

TWO YEARS, ONE MONTH LATER

"MOMMY!" GIMME A JUICE, MOM!"

"Lucinda Victoria Andrea Ripley...you know better than to scream at Mommy,or demand things...
TRY AGAIN."

"MOM-MY!"

"YES-SY!"

"Lucy gives in. "Mommy, may I please have some juice?"

Vic selects a mango and orange blend from the refrigerator. "Here you are, Madam."

"Dank-oo." Blue-eyed and coffee-brown, the toddler gulps the juice greedily, and with a
sly glance at her Mother, breathes "Ahhhhhhhhh...GOOD!"

Rather than scold her, Vic shares a laugh with her.