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Chapter Text

Reverend John Green sat staring aimlessly at the wall in the study. He could hear the light brushing sounds of Miss White dusting the shelves and it was growing evermore irritating. When his annoyance peaked he decided to ditch his attempts to concentrate on the words before him and go for a stroll-maybe Mustard would be up for a game of billiards?

Summoning all of his strength, Greenie pushed open the heavy wooden door and exited into the airy hallway. Absentmindedly he walked towards the billiards room past the library but his path was cut short by a purple figure. Professor Peter Plum. Plummers toppled to the ground and his huge stack of books fell with a crash. The reverend blushed and hurriedly bent to help Plum pick up the books.

“Oh my word, I am so, so sorry!” John gasped, his round face growing pink with embarrassment as he looked into the professor’s slim face.

“No, no it is okay, it-it’s fine, Reverend,” Peter stuttered out whilst struggling to catch all of the papers that had fallen out of his books.

“You can call me…” John hesitated. His mind was telling him to say ‘John’, yet looking at the professor’s defined cheekbones he yearned to be called something more intimate. “Greenie” he finished breathlessly.

“Okay…Greenie” Peter said, blushing. “In that case I suppose you can call me Plummers.” Plummers smiled nervously up at John, their eyes meeting. After a prolonged silence, Greenie finally stuttered out “So…you busy? ‘Cause I was planning on heading over to the billiards room and ermm, we could invite the Colonel or ermm…not?”

Plummers grinned, flashing his white teeth “Yeah, the billiards room sounds good,”

An audible tutting sound came from behind them as Mrs Peacock strode past them, heading towards the ballroom for her piano practice. Plummers glanced at her briefly before making his way into the musty billiards room and Greenie followed quickly behind.

The room was relatively bare except for the monstrous billiards table in the centre; Plum glanced around before turning to Greenie and asking “So….what exactly were you planning on doing in here?”

“Shit” Greenie thought-he hadn’t really thought about what they would do. “Ermm…well I thought we could err…” he trailed off.

Plummers flashed his grin once more before edging closer to Greenie. John’s heart raced as Plummers brought his lips to whisper in his ear “You’re a sexy green beast, Greenie” he whispered before kissing Greenie hard on the lips. Greenie kissed back before they heard the loud creak of the door opening.

There stood Miss Scarlet, her mouth wide open.

“Shit” Greenie thought.

TO BE CONTINUED………..

Chapter Text

“Oh my god!” Miss Scarlett exclaimed in shock.

“Ahh, Miss Scarlett would you be so kind as to come into the room so Greenie, ahem I mean John and I can explain ourselves?” Plummers said quickly.

Apprehensively, Josephine Scarlett entered the room, and to their relief closed the door behind her. Greenie noticed there were tears welling in her eyes.

“Plummers,” she cried “I thought we had something special! But now I see all you were interested in was him!” She turned to head through the door.

“Josephine, wait!” Peter said, grabbing her arm. “Just sit down on this chair here”

Miss Scarlett did so, although she looked distressed. All this time Greenie was watching red faced; he had no idea that anything was going on between Miss Scarlett and Plummers. He felt a stab of jealousy at the thought of them – Plummers was his, and he was Plummers’ sexy green beast.

John watched as Plummers’ gloved hand reached for a candlestick holder and his head began to pound as the sound of Patricia Peacock’s piano boomed from the diagonally adjacent room. Absentmindedly he wondered whether her son, Chris Peacock, would be visiting any time soon.

Suddenly, there was a crash as the metal candlestick holder collided with Josephine’s skull. She collapsed from the armchair onto the floor.

She was dead!

“Holy shit Plummers, what did you do‽” Greenie exclaimed.

“Shhhh, Papa Green we can’t let anybody find out about us! We must flee this room immediately!” Plum responded.

They exited the room and escaped through the now vacated conservatory which Colonel Mustard had previously been lounging in. Thankfully there was a secret passage leading to the lounge, which luckily was also empty and they both sat there nervously…it would only be a matter of time before the body was discovered.

Sure enough, after a few minutes a scream omitted from the opposite end of the house. They both left the lounge to see Blanche White emerging from the billiards room as white as a sheet.

“There’s-there’s been…a murder!” she stuttered out.

Murmurs passed between the members of the household who were nervous and wondering what had happened. Greenie was sweating nervously yet Plummers seemed to be keeping remarkably cool.

All of a sudden there was a knock on the door. Greenie thought frantically – was it the police come to arrest him?

Who could be at the door………………….?