Chapter Text
“I just feel so bad, Peeta.”
My girlfriend, Delly, just got out of detention and I was driving her home in my car.
“It was like something took over me. You know me, I would never do that! Poor Kat, she got her first period today, you know. Her crazy mom didn’t tell her anything about it, and we threw tampons at her and just made fun of her Peet, made fun of her ‘til she dropped to the floor crying.”
We reach her house and I parked the car in front. I looked at her, and held her hands; she looks like a mess. With her clammy hands, and tear-stricken face, Delly really did look sorry. I have known Delly all my life. For the small sleepy town of Panem, Maine, everyone knows everyone. Delly and I were the typical couple who were destined to be together, me being the captain of the wrestling team, and her being the president of almost everything. A venn diagram of her friends and mine would be a perfect circle. I know Delly wouldn’t do that, she was the perfect student. Her best friend, Clove, however, was the most likely propagator. Her daddy’s a top shot lawyer and she gets away unscathed most of the time.
Katniss Everdeen, on the other hand, is an enigma. We seem to know a lot for someone who never says a word. She keeps to herself, and ignores all the taunts. How she can tolerate that, I wouldn’t know. Her mom runs a small sewing business, and everyone knows her as a religious extremist. She would make Katniss wear these dark ill-fitting clothes, and style her raven-black hair in a long braid down her back. Always a braid, ever since we were little. Not that I kept track or anything.
“Hey, babe. Everyone was doing it. If you want my advice, I suggest you apologize to her.”
Delly’s face lights up, and she smiles for the first time since I saw her today.
“That’s a great idea, Peeta! It’s so simple, I can’t believe I didn’t see it!”
I give her a kiss good bye, and wait until I see her go inside her house safely. I drove off and my mind wanders back to Katniss. I remember when we were little, before her father died, there was something…special about her. For someone so small of age, she exuded so much power that most kids didn’t want to approach her, myself included. But there was something about her, something that kept me keeping my eye on her throughout the years. After her dad died and her mom went crazy, she tried to keep that power hidden, but even then, she couldn’t really hide it. I guess it was that plus the non-conformity, and non-caring attitude that made her such an easy target for all our schoolmates. We can’t understand why someone won’t fit in a certain stereotype. Sure, she was as religious and as self-righteous as her mother (or at least that’s what we think), but she was her own person and I admire her for that. It was just such a pity nobody knows her. Really knows her. We all think we understand her, but no one really does. She must have dreams too; she must feel the loneliness of the years.
That night while I was thinking of a poem idea for English class homework, I thought of Katniss again, and I wrote about her. My pen touched the paper and took a mind of its own. I never knew how much I cared about the girl with the braid, nor how it seems like I understand what she’s going through. In some way, nobody really knows me too. Although I am surrounded by friends, nobody knows my passions and dreams. It’s nowhere near what Katniss is going through, but it made me realize maybe she isn’t so different after all. It took me an hour before I was satisfied with it, and prepared for bed.
“I know that most of you here have already been accepted to colleges, but that does not give you an excuse to slack off on your work. Fortunately, not all of you have been slacking off. In fact, one of you has written a beautiful poem, full of emotion and sincerity. It is entitled ‘Dreamer in Disguise’ written by our very own Peeta Mellark.”
Our teacher, Ms. Purnia, gestures for me to come forward and read my poem aloud. I look behind me to roll my eyes at my friends, but instead saw Katniss. I stared at her for a few seconds too long that she saw me looking and bowed her head. I look away too, my cheeks already reddening from being caught staring.
“Come on, Mr. Mellark! We don’t have all day, you know.” Ms. Purnia says, a bit annoyed to be kept waiting. I stand up, and read the poem out loud.
“An eagle's just another bird
until he can spread his wings
A river is just a sheet of ice
till winter turns to spring
And though the clouds may block the sun
don't mean that it's left the sky
Just when you thought you've seen it all
there's more that meets the eye
Like things I dream and things I feel
there's more to me than I reveal.
And ‘cause I shine in quiet ways
I'm someone you don't recognize
I'm a diamond in the rough, a dreamer in disguise”
I looked up from the paper, and met Katniss’ eyes again. She holds my gaze this time, and I am the first to look away. I take my seat again, and my friends are already giving me crap for being a softie. Ms. Purnia applauds by herself.
“Bravo, Mr. Mellark! Such a beautiful piece from an unexpected source. Can anyone here share their thoughts on this poem? Anyone?”
As usual, no one pays attention. Ms. Purnia, unfazed by this, saw that Katniss for the first time was actually attentive.
“Ms. Everdeen, any thoughts?”
And for the first time since I've known her, I hear her voice.
“I-It, it was beautiful.”
Her voice was firm, and serious. Everybody erupted in a fit of laughter, and Ms. Purnia, unsuccessfully tried to calm everybody down. The bell rang, and everyone hurried to leave, Katniss included. I caught up with her, and talked to her, also for the first time.
“Thank you for that. Sometimes it’s hard not to have anyone that can see you for who you truly are.”
For a moment, I know I took her by surprise. She was taken aback, first of all that I’m talking to her, but that didn’t last long. She schooled her features back to her normal stony expression, but once she heard what I said, her expression softened a bit. She must have realized though that I can never really understand her, so she politely excused herself.
“Yeah… I have to head to class now.”
“Don’t be a stranger, Katniss.”
My next encounter with Katniss Everdeen was asking her to Prom. Dressed in a nice blue button-down, and khaki pants, I stood waiting at her door with dandelions and two tickets to the prom in my hands. Her house was a simple bungalow. It wasn’t well maintained, with the grass overgrown, and the beige paint cracking. Still, it looked normal. You wouldn’t imagine that a crazy woman lived there. Katniss’ mom was not right in the head, no doubt about it. She didn’t start out crazy, she was a party girl if rumors were true. It was not until she met Katniss’ father, Preacher Abe, that she became religious. And it was not until Abe died, that she devoted her life, and Katniss’ as well, to the lord. She stopped going out unless necessary, and when she does, she makes it a point to be vocal about what she sees wrong with everybody. Mr. Carter smoking his cigarette is going to jail for such a vice, so is Ms. Leeway for wearing a “slutty” blouse. It appears the only ones saved from damnation is her and Katniss.
Thinking about that made me want to rethink ringing the doorbell and taking Katniss to prom. But I promised Delly I would. For Delly, I would give the moon. I still remember that day, a couple days ago. She was upset again. She tried apologizing to Katniss on the same day I recited my poem. Katniss must have had enough teasing and talking to that once she started apologizing, Katniss snapped. Katniss looked her in the eye and said, “haven’t you had enough.”
Delly had gotten into her head that if I would go to prom with Katniss instead of her, it would magically make things better. I told her she was delusional.
“Believe me, Peeta. It’s going to work. You don’t see her staring at you, but I do. She has a crush on you. Please Peeta, do it for me?” She then looked at me with those puppy dog eyes, and how can I say no to that? So here I am, standing outside of Katniss Everdeen’s house, ready to make a fool of myself when she rejects me. I ring the doorbell and wait. A few seconds passed and I am greeted at the sight of Katniss Everdeen herself.
Katniss is clearly shocked to see me at the door. We stand awkwardly, silence filling the gap. I hand her the flowers with a nervous smile. “These are for you. I hope you like them; they remind me of you.” She looks down at the bunch of dandelions I handed to her.
“What, I’m a weed? Is this some kind of joke?” She scowls at her feet, her words a whisper.
“No, no, no-”
She moves to close the door, but I jam my foot in between to keep it from closing. “You’re strong. When the world goes against you, you stand your ground.” She freezes, and I continue. “No matter how hard you try and hide, you stand out amongst the crowd. We’re all drawn by the power and strength you exude. I think that’s why they do what they do, they’re afraid of what they can’t understand.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“Because you need to hear it, and I don’t think you know it.”
She finally looks at me, and I see that she has tears in her eyes. She quickly wipes it away and lets out a sigh.
“I’m not that strong, you make me sound like a different person.”
“But you are.”
We stand for a while in the silence, me just looking into her eyes and nose and… lips. Katniss Everdeen never looked as beautiful as she did now. She breaks my stare with a cough, and then I remember the purpose of my visit. I stammer a bit, caught off-guard.
“I-I wanted to ask you something, if that’s okay?”
“What is it?”
“Will you go to prom with me?”