Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

spockie took a screenshot 

-

chodey 
saving that one for the spank bank
?

spockie
the hoodie pic?

chodey 
obviously

spockie 
yeah, it was cute

chodey
thanks

spock didn't need to tell cody he was absolutely right, in the same way cody didn't need to tell spock he was hoping he was right. neither would confirm anything and they both could assume whatever they want to be true.

it was easier that way. in the moment it was, at least.

chodey 
it's really comfortable
like it was 
when i was wearing it it was comfortable

spockie
yeah, that's why i like it

chodey
yeah

spockie
it looked good on you

chodey
you think?

spockie
yeah

he clicked off of snapchat.

spock didn't know how the conversation would continue. he was too forward. to just say that cody looked good was sudden and almost random coming from him.

it wasn't like he was lying. cody did look really good in that hoodie.

he looked good in it when he put it on in the club bathroom.

he looked good in it when they stumbled into that cab.

and he definitely looked good in it when he was asleep curled up next to spock.

thinking back on it makes him wish he hadn't left. that he let it be normal instead of making it weird. that he could've just gotten out of his own head for a few minutes and enjoyed it.

it wasn't that weird. and it didn't have to be weird at all if spock didn't make it weird, right?

Chapter Text

cody had written, deleted, and rewritten several messages last night. he really wanted to keep talking to spock, but couldn't think of anything to say in the moment.

he didn't end up sending anything, figuring he would come up with something to say by morning. and if he didn't, he could always rely on a simple 'morning' text to start conversation the next day.

chodey
morning

he couldn't come up with anything.

but surprisingly he got a message back pretty quickly. quicker than spock usually messages him back.

spockie
hey man

chodey
sleep well
?

what a stupid fucking question.

spockie
yeah
i slept fine ig

chodey
thats good

spockie
yeah
and you?

chodey
what?
oh yeah
i slept well

the blonde isn't sure he could ask dumber questions if he tried. he's never asked him about his sleep - why would he now?

just like the night before, the conversation ended there, on that weird note that verged on making cody cringe. it wasn't enough for him to make a face or wanna curl into himself. although, it was enough that he felt that nervous heat travel up his chest and stay there.

and it stayed for longer than cody would've liked. it's an editing day for him, meaning he's not going to the studio, not seeing noel, not don't anything but editing. so, he has no distractions just when he needs one most.

that feeling didn't magically melt away. it did lessen its grip on cody's chest when a notification with spock's name popped up on his lockscreen some hours later.

spockie
hey

chodey
hi

spockie
had lunch yet?

chodey
no

spockie
wanna get something?
noel and i were gonna go to this place we found
he bailed
i still wanna go

chodey
yeah
can you pick me up?

spockie
yeah
10 minutes work?

chodey
yeah
see ya then
:)

the old feeling in cody's chest was replaced with something new. something much lighter. it was a new rare flavor of nervous energy that cody wasn't too familiar with. and it was much nicer than the dreaded, sinking feeling he started the day with.  

and this new feeling didn't go away. 

not when he threw on a nicer pare of jeans.

not when decided to keep his glasses, rather than put his contacts in. 

not even when there was a knock at the door. it just became more intense. more real.

the feeling settled a bit when he opened the door. 

they greeted each other. and cody the urge to touch him, hug him maybe, but he didn't.

they walked. spock had mentioned something about the place being closer to cody's apartment then he'd originally realized. 

it was a short walk; honestly they didn't talk for it. for the walk there or even through lunch, really.

but it wasn't in the same way it usually was. they often found themselves wound up in a tight, tense something, that cody hadn't really noticed until then. because they suddenly didn't have it.

chodey
hey
i forgot to get you your hoodie
like after lunch

spockie
yeah?

chodey
yeah
i meant to get it back to you
so
uh
sorry

spockie
that's alright

chodey
im not trying to hoard it or anything

spockie
i didn't think you were

cody took a moment. realized how preemptively he was making excuses for things spock wasn't accusing him of. he wasn't really sure what those accusations were either, but they couldn't be that bad, nothing to make excuses over.

it was over a hoodie.

spockie
if you like it that much
you could just say so

chodey
oh ok

spockie
i wasn't kidding when i said it looks good on you

cody felt a familiar heat pulling in his lower stomach, pulling further down.

a simple text probably shouldn't have that effect on him.

chodey
thank you

spockie
next time you wear it, send another pic

oh.

Chapter Text

chodey
it got kinda cold in my apartment
[image.png]

spock is always a bit nervous to send messages, especially when they're meant to be even just mildly flirty. he's not very good at flirting. he worries he's coming on too strong. 

he had worried about that yesterday when cody didn't say anything back.

but he probably didn't have to, based on that picture.

it was similar in some ways to the first one he sent in spock's hoodie. it's obvious he's only wearing the hoodie, just like in the first one. cody still looks small in it. the way his head is tilted just a bit so he's looking at his phone as he takes the picture is the same.

the picture was different in other ways. this one wasn't really staged. cody's not really posing. he stood tall and confident in the first one. but not so much here. with messy hair, and his glasses falling down his nose, cody looks like he just woke up. he has a sleeved hand over part of his face and spock could swear he could see a bit of red across what little he could see of cody's face. like he's flustered.

sleepy and flustered is a really good look on cody.

spockie took a screenshot

-

spockie
nice
very pretty

cody didn't respond after that. not right away. 

which was fine. spock felt oddly confident about everything in that moment.

chodey
hey
can you do me a favor

spockie
sure
what is it?

chodey
can you repeat what you said earlier
?
please

spockie
what?
you're pretty?

chodey
yeah
that
can you
like
repeat it again
please

spockie
why?

chodey
i just
i really need you to

spockie
you're pretty cody
i think you're pretty in my hoodie

again cody didn't respond after that. and although he had some idea why, spock didn't want to jump to conclusions.

so spock got curious.

he wanted to know if this was normal. for cody. if his suspicions were right. and noel would probably know. with how much time they spend together, noel is probably an expert on cody by now.

he debated it to himself for a moment. on one hand, he hadn't talked to noel or asked him anything during all this, before. he felt weird explaining the specifics of this weird, undefined, awkward, and very sexual relationship he and cody fell into, with another person that cody is also definitely sleeping with.

on the other hand. cody might be jerking off to spock calling him pretty, and he wants to know if he's right. and the other person cody's sleeping with is also spock's friend.

so, really he's just checking up on a friend, through another friend, right? 

that was good enough of an excuse. good enough for spock.

he clicked off of his messages with cody and went down to his with noel.

spockie
hey
quick question

nole
yeah

he started typing out something. then deleted all of it. it was too much explanation and justification. he didn't really need (or want) to explain everything to noel for a simple question.

spock scrolled back to his conversation with cody and took a screenshot. just the last part.

spockie
[screenshot.png]
does cody have a "pretty" kink or something?

nole 
uh
obviously
he's probably crankin it to that rn

spock hadn't anticipated noel taking that question completely seriously.

spock realizes that as the person asking the question, after sending those messages, he probably should've expected noel to take the question completely seriously.

spockie
you think?

nole
why'd you call him pretty?

spockie
he was wearing my hoodie

nole
why was he wearing your hoodie?

spockie
he said he was cold

noel didn't respond to that.

spockie
i told him he should

nole
yeah, there's no way he isn't jerking it rn

spockie
are you sure?

nole
yes
dude 
you told him to do something 
then praised him for it
now he's jerkin it
he's not a complicated guy garrett
just really fucking needy

obviously, cody is needy. spock, or really anyone who's ever met him, knows cody can be really needy for attention. and spock is learning the extent of it.

apparently cody is much needier for attention when he's horny. who would've thought?

spockie
should i not do that next time?
like if there is a next time, i mean

nole
idk
i usually just tease the shit out of him when he does stuff like that

spockie
dude
i know
it's obvious
to me
probably not to everyone
cody isn't really subtle
you could probably make him nut in public
and no one would know it was you

nole
actually
that's not a bad idea
i'll have to keep that in mind
so
anyway
you guys good now
*?

spockie 
what do yo mean?

nole
like i'm assuming you and cody talked shit through and you're good

spockie
yeah?
we're chill, i think
we like went to lunch yesterday
there's this little place near his apartment so we went there

nole
i didn't know there was jack shit around codys place
how tf you find that?

spockie
idk
just heard about it somewhere i guess
but no
we haven't talked about shit or anything

nole
ffs

spockie
???

nole
nothing
cody's a little bitch
that's all

spockie
ok
i guess?

conversation went on normally after that. whatever normal is in this context at least, which is to say that they talked about the shit they normally do, and occasionally just casually mentioned and joked about fucking their friend as if it wasn't the least bit odd.

but that was fine.

that normalcy was a nice change after several weeks of stressing over... everything. a normalcy he wished he had sooner, wished he let himself have sooner. a normalcy that could be gone by morning, like it never existed in the first place.

spock tried not to think about that. about how this small comfortable period could end very quickly. and at anytime. generally he didn't. but it was just a fact that loomed in some distant part of his mind, making him vaguely aware of that reality almost all the time.

chodey
btw
thanks for
like
that
like earlier and stuff

spockie
yeah, no problem man

Chapter Text

spockie
hey
cody
can you do me a favor

chodey
yeah
?

spockie
go get some water
like go fill up a cup and bring it back to your desk

chodey
why
i mean ill do it
but why
?

spockie
i just wanna see something

it was an a bit if an odd request, but cody couldn't come up with anything when he asked himself 'why not'. 

chodey
k
done

spockie
send a pic

chodey
of a cup of water
???

spockie
ye

chodey
ok
sure ig
gimme a sec
[image.png]

spockie
good
thank you
good boy cody

he liked that, liked those messages. especially the last part.

cody hates to admit it - well, not really. he hates admitting this kind of stuff to noel, but noel is usually more of ass about it. not that cody really hates that either, it's more just a part of their back and forth.

so, no cody doesn't hate to admit it. it's moreso embarrassing at times to admit. 

regardless, even though he's pretty indifferent to being ordered around, he loves praise like that. cody would do anything for it. even if it isn't meant like that. he loves it. 

he's pretty sure spock is just testing the waters. trying to figure out what cody likes, or maybe just what he'll comply with. he wasn't sure at first. he didn't know what specifically would've made spock think about this. but after about the fourth task spock have him, followed by some sort of praise when cody snapped proof, he was pretty confident in saying that spock was experimenting a bit.

they were all small tasks. and besides the first one, the hoodie one, they were all things that could be done in the moment. they were things like 'get a cup of water' or 'find a red pen'.

cody could very well call him out on it. if it was noel, he would. but it's fun to just not do what noel says, to be "forced" to or punished for not doing what noel said. but if it were noel telling him to do this shit, he'd be yanking cody's chain for the fun of it.

spock isn't doing this to fuck with cody. he's experimenting. and complying with spock's tasks for the sake of it is nice. it feels nice. even if it is for just a bit of awkward praise. because every awkward bit of praise cody receives does more for him than he's willing to admit.

spockie
cody

chodey
yeah
?

spockie
how long have you been working at your desk?

chodey
almost all day
minus the few times you asked me to do shit today

spockie
ok
how much do you have left?

chodey
a good bit
i'm editing a video
it's gonna take a few days i think

spockie
do you think you can be done for the day?

cody didn't know how to respond. because, yes, technically he could be done for now, but he also could just continue working and feel like he's being more productive.

chodey
are you telling me to be done for the day
?
it's ok if you are

usually cody would just drag his feet through the last few hours in a day until he was either tired and felt he done enough for the day, or he wanted attention, in which case he'd usually call noel.

although, spock is already giving him the attention he wants. he's been doing that all day. so if spock wanted him to be done, to do something else for him for the rest of the day, cody absolutely would.

chodey
i don't mind being ordered around a bit

cody worried about that last message. 

he hasn't talked to spock about anything like this. and sure, maybe noel was right and cody should've talked with spock about this stuff, about anything, so they aren't left floundering around in this mess. cody felt like he was floundering.

spockie
ok
yeah
i'm telling you i guess

chodey
telling me what
?

spockie
you're done working for the day

this was spock's experiment, but cody was curious too. 

chodey
what should i do instead
?

he wanted to do a little experimenting of his own. cody wanted to know how far he could push this.

spockie
have you eaten?

chodey
not since morning

spock had him order out as cody didn't really have a lot of food in the house. cody asked spock to pick for him, just to see if he'd do it.

he did.

spock picked out the place cody ordered from. what he ordered. what he watched while he waited for his food. everything. even the clothes he changed into.

every 'very pretty' and 'good boy, cody' message got to him. more than he thought it would. he felt a familiar thick heat pooling in him. he tried to ignore it. ignoring it felt a little more impossible everytime spock told him to do something.

honestly, he didn't think spock would actually do any of that when he originally asked. but he kept agreeing, so cody kept asking.

oddly enough, that sentiment seems to reflect their entire dynamic.

chodey
[image.png]
my food is here

spockie
ok
go eat
we can talk more when you're done

chodey
i can multitask

spockie
just eat your food
don't worry about your phone

and he just didn't. he didn't worry about his phone. he just put it down and ate. 

he ate and he continued watching some sure. spock picked it out for him.

he didn't know what made listening to spock so alluring to him. he's not very authoritative. generally, he's a pretty relaxed and grounded guy. definitely not someone cody would expect to boss him around for a day. although, that could be part of the draw. that it's unexpected.

thinking back, spock didn't really order him to do anything. everything was a suggestion or a "favor" that cody was praised for. and almost everything he told cody to do was something that benefitted cody. whether spock realized it or not, he just ordered cody to take care of himself all day.

he ordered me to take care of myself all day.

chodey
i finished eating

half-truth: he was done eating at the moment. but at least half of his food went into the fridge.

spockie
good

chodey
what do you want me to do now
?

his face get a bit hot as he typed it out.

spockie
just relax man
whatever you usually do to relax, do that

there was that heat again.

he could ignore. or he could act on it. spock gave him permission.

kind of. he told him to relax. 

and that certainly would help.

the blonde grabbed his phone and practically jumped from the couch and booked it for his room. he tossed his phone on his bed and rummaged through his night stand for a bottle of lube. 

he laid himself up in bed once he found it.

cody quickly covered a few fingers, then slid them down his sweatpants. he rubbed his fingers over himself. then pushed two in. cody rushed to work those fingers in and out of himself, impatiently trying to work himself up to four.

when he got four, he stopped. he sat up on his knees and before pushing back in, he grabbed his phone. he opened his messages with spock back up and looked for the praise.

he sunk back onto his fingers, looking through their messages. whimpering at every 'good boy' texts and whatever variations he could find while his hips move in small, quick rolls to ride his fingers.

his hips didn't stop, but slowed when his phone auto-scrolled cody back to the bottom of their messages. spock was typing. but he didn't send anything.

so cody did.

chodey
can i call
?

spockie
sure

"hello?" 

cody moaned when spock's voice flooded over the speaker phone. too horny to really think about it. any of it.

"oh."

"heh...hey," a long string of moans left cody's mouth before he could continue, "can you, uh, just, just uh... the thing from earlier... i, please..."

"what thing?"

"...please..." he panted out. with shaky fingers, he put spock on speaker and let his phone drop to the bed, wrapping his now free hand around himself. 

"do you want me to tell you what to do?"

"no. after... just after."

"that you're good?"

"yes - oh fuck - please!"

"ok."

spock stayed quiet.

cody filled that quiet with his own whining and groaning, and several few more pleas.

spock still stayed quiet and cody started to get nervous. cody started to slow his hands. he came back to reality a bit. thinking maybe he shouldn't have called.

his thoughts didn't get much further than that. spock finally started again: "you were really good, cody."

cody hand squeezed a bit tighter as he started to fuck into his hand.

he went quiet again. it wasn't as long this time. only a moment. 

"all day, you were good. you did everything i asked you to," his voice had something... "even when you didn't need me-" it wasn't like noel's. he didn't use a bullish tone like noel. he's not sure spock actually could make his voice sound like that. "-you still had me decide for you, because you're such a good boy."

but there was a sort of fake kindness to it. barely noticeable, but still there.

it added so much. it was everything.

he didn't really listen to what else spock said. he didn't need to. it was just how he said it. 

he noticed himself starting to shake, having a hard time keeping his position. cody pushed his arm out in front of him and leaned on it, using it to keep him steady.

cody pushed his fingers into himself, and completely focused on slowing massaging his fingers over his prostate to spock's voice. 

his arm rested against his dick. he tried to move against it, weakly humping his arm, trying to get any bit of friction on his dick back. "please, i need-"

"go on, you can do it."

there it was again. that fake kindness.

basically pushing his orgasm out of him.

cody relaxed against his bed, not paying any mind to the odd position he found himself in. it was kind of comfortable. or maybe he just didn't want to move.

he gave a shaky 'thank you' and then he started to pull his fingers out.

"yeah, get some sleep, cody."

Chapter Text

spockie
morning

chodey
morning
:)
hey
sorry about yesterday
it was weird of me to call

spockie
it's fine dude

it'd be a lie if spock said he was expecting cody to call him while he was jerking off. but he couldn't really say he was surprised, either.

noel basically told him it would happen. and surprisingly he was fine when it did. he didn't panic; he didn't get weird about it; he just let it be normal in the moment. spock didn't make it weird. and oddly enough, he'd managed to do that pretty well this week so far.

chodey
are you sure
?
we've never really done stuff like that
and it was super out of the blue

everything we've done has been out of the blue. every. fucking. thing.

chodey
i wasn't really thinking
i'm sorry basically

spockie
dude
you asked to call me
if i got uncomfortable i could just hang up

chodey
yeah

spockie
i didn't hang up

chodey
yeah

not that he doesn't still panic, he very much does. when spock realized cody was getting off to him, to things he said to him, he didn't really know what to do. assuming there was anything to do. but he also didn't fantasize about taking a knife to his eardrums because he couldn't get cody's shaky 'thank you' replays out of his head.

if anything, it was very much the opposite. he didn't mind that shaky 'thank you' stuck in his head. he probably could've jerked off to it. he probably will jerk of to it at some point and when he does he probably won't absolutely hate himself for it.

but, spock kept thinking how it's not gay if he's not the one getting off, being willfully ignorant to the fact that he's definitely thinking about getting off on yesterday's events and already has been the one getting off before. quite a bit actually. just not in that moment, so it could feasibly be ignored in spock's mind.

and sure, he's aware that's he's jerked off to the pictures of cody wearing his hoodie. he's just choosing to ignore that fact, too. it may be hypocritical of him, but there's only so much he can process at once. especially when so much has happened this week.

spockie
was what i said ok?

chodey
yeah
i think
i didn't really listen to a lot of what you said
you sounded kinda mean

spockie
fuck dude
i'm sorry
i wasn't trying to be a dick

chodey
no
it's a good thing
i liked it

at least it feels like a lot. he had lunch with cody. it wasn't really a date. but it kind of felt like one. to spock. he didn't really know what cody thought about it. he hadn't asked. (and he also may have lied about noel ditching him to do so, but neither have brought that up so he's sure-ish that that's fine.) 

he's pretty sure he's gotten cody off twice this week. only one of those times was semi-unintentional. he had an idea of what cody was doing, but didn't wasn't really sure until noel confirmed it. spock still went along with it anyways. and the other time basically he rambled some mediocre dirty talk and that seemed to be more than enough for cody. 

then there's also the whole 'ordering cody to do stuff for a day'. which was yesterday and spock still can't really fathom trying to confront all the things that made him feel. it was a lot. and got to the point that cody wanted and expected him to decide things for him. it seemed that way.

(spock thinks he liked it. but he doesn't know if he liked it because he was making those decisions for cody, or if it was because he was doing all of that with cody. that's kind of where he is with everything. is he actually into any of what they've done? or just cody?)

none of these things were big events or anything. but they felt big. they all made spock feel a lot things. things he hadn't felt before the last few weeks unraveled. he had no idea where to begin in trying to understand any of it.

thinking back on it, he's probably been a lot calmer in general this week because he didn't really think - refused to think - about a lot of those things. all of the aspects that's usually stress him out.

spock has gone from thinking about everything all the time and letting those thoughts completely consume him, to not letting himself think about any of this shit at all. moreso just acknowledging that he's not quite sure what he's feeling and then nothing further. which probably isn't healthy, but he's way less angry and anxious about everything.

this is really the first time he's thought about any of this, this week.

he's remembering why he stopped.

it's not fun.

he could ask noel about some of these things. he probably went through something similar when he and cody started fucking around, right?

spock didn't know them when they started fucking around with each other. so he doesn't really know, but he can't imagine noel didn't feel something like what spock's feeling.

then of course, he could probably talk to cody about this stuff too.

spockie 
you like it when i'm mean?

chodey
kinda
yeah
i didn't really expect it
but like
idk
you were kinda 
patronizing ig
and i really liked it

spockie
oh ok

he probably should talk to cody. about a lot of things. it'd probably be especially easy to bring up now.

that was something noel brought up that spock couldn't stop thinking about. noel, whether he meant to or not, made it seem like cody had some things he needed to talk about, too. 

which could be a good thing. they could have one big conversation. cover all this shit and move on, whatever moving on entails.

chodey
the stuff before that was fun too
like making me do stuff

spockie
good

chodey
did you like it too
like ordering me around and stuff

spockie
i think so
yeah
i was nervous about it

chodey
?

spockie
i didn't wanna make you do anything that would take too long
or like
something that distract you too much

chodey
but you wanted to see how far i'd go
?

spockie
yeah kinda

he doesn't really let himself think about the possibility that a conversation could complicate things or make them awkward if they don't communicate very well. and sure they are right now, in this moment. but the these past few weeks they haven't at all.

this could just be an exception to their almost non-existent communication rather than them actually starting to talk through things.

spock hopes it isn't. but he can't do much about it other than try to keep conversation going.

spockie
i didn't really think you'd get that into it honestly

chodey
same honestly
oh yeah
also
i wanted to ask

and if it's not. if this isn't an exception. if they are actually starting to talk. maybe they shouldn't talk about everything at once. sure, it'd be nice to. just cover everything in one go, and then not have to worry about it. 

but, that might be just a little unrealistic. going from talking about nothing, to everything in a matter of days could be to much.

spock definitely gets that it being way to much at once, if he just brought up everything in one conversation. 

everything has been to much, and he didn't really handle it well. he's not really handling it well. he's not handling it at all. just ignoring it. which, again, isn't great, but is definitely better than wanting to his hand through his windshield.

so maybe some conversations can wait. maybe these things should wait.

they should ease into these conversations.

gradually.

chodey
tomorrow
after we're done in the studio
i wanted to know if you wanted to come over
?

they can wait until tomorrow.

at least.

Chapter Text

cody wore the fucking hoodie.

and spock didn't say anything. not at loud at least. there were a lot of people in and out of the studio all day, so if was going to say something he didn't get a chance. he just texted him instead. 

they texted each other a good bit in the studio. not so much that they couldn't get anything done or anything. but enough to make noel roll his eyes everytime cody picked up his phone and occasionally mumble something about 'acting like some dumbass horny teenagers'.

cody ignored him. and he's pretty sure spock couldn't hear noel with his headphones on.

and that was it. that's all they did until they left the studio.

it was frustrating.

it's frustrating that he could act any which way with noel but not spock.

with noel, cody doesn't have to text him so no one else knows what their saying or hide how much he really wants his attention. just about everyone, or at least most people they work with, know about the thing between cody and noel.

everyone knows noel blows cody's back out whenever he wants him to. some people have heard them. some people walked in on them (several times, in spock's case. this all started because of that). and they've just always been like that with each other. it's honestly weird for cody remembering a time when they weren't like that with each other. 

so when cody wants attention and clings to noel's side around other people, those people don't fucking care. they barely even notice cody's doing it. 

one time, they were working on a couple of songs and cody had idea for a beat. just to fuck with him, noel refused to get from the computer. so cody sat in his lap and started working. no one said anything. other than noel. who just laughed and made some comment or other about cody just wanting an excuse to sit it his lap. 

he can't do that with spock. 

they don't work as closely together. they don't see each other as much. almost no one knows about the thing developing between him and spock. so cody just doesn't have the same opportunities to do dumb little shit like that with spock like he does noel. 

so cody had to focus on their current project and wait for one of them to call it for the day. 

it was spock who eventually called it. he asked cody if he was still taking him home, more as a courtesy than anything else.

noel had that stupid ass, all knowing smirk on his face when cody said yes. noel also texted him almost immediately after they left.

nole
have fun on your dick date

chodey
get fucked

nole
isn't that your job?

chodey
:P

stupid dick.

he pocketed his phone and got in the car.

"you look good." spock commented, putting the key in the ignition and turning it. "i meant to something earlier, like, well i did, i guess. but i mean, like, out loud. like, to you."

cody smiled. "thanks man."

it didn't feel as long this time. last time it was just them in a car together it felt suffocating. not the entire time, but definitely some of it.

the still didn't talk much, other than spock rambling as he fumbled to untangle the aux cord from his seat belt so he could hand it to cody. there was also a brief discussion of if they were getting food (they were) and where from (cody doesn't remember, but spock picked it). 

other than that, they were pretty quiet. but it was a comfortable, only mildly awkward because of nerves kind of quiet. not the tense and stiff kind of quiet they'd been stuck with for the past few weeks. 

they were starting to have a lot of those comfortable quiet moments. cody didn't mind it.

he certainly didn't mind when that quiet followed them to his apartment. 

or when spock broke it to ask him what he wanted. (cody told him to pick for him.)

or even when it came back and stayed. 

-

they didn't really talk again until after their food came. 

they were eating. and they had something on (some documentary, spock thought it sounded cool) that cody wasn't really paying attention to. he just watched spock's reactions. 

admittedly it's a bit odd. he's just watching him with fascination for the subtle movements his face makes. 

cody was pretty sure spock was going to call him out on it. he glanced towards cody then opened his mouth like he was going to say something and then just didn't. 

"hmm?"

"what?"

"nothing, I thought you were gonna say something."

"no, not really."

cody nodded. "ok."

he didn't really believe spock but he didn't want to push it.

and then it was quiet again. not necessarily the new comfortable one or the old tense one.

it wasn't anything.

just quiet. 

cody hated it. 

he looked to the food in his lap. he'd stopped eating a while ago.

"i, uh, i think i'm gonna put my leftovers in the fridge. do you want me to really yours too?" cody gestured to spock's lap of food. he hadn't really eaten much off his either in a while.

"uh, nah, i got it." 

"alright." he didn't want for him, just walked out to the kitchen and starting getting a few plastic containers out.

spock followed him out a few moments later.

"hey, can i ask you something?"

"uh, yeah, sure."

spock hesitated. just a bit. and only for second. but cody couldn't swore he did.

"do you, uh, why did you like this stuff? like me telling you what to do." spock paused. "you said you liked it but i never really asked why. i meant to."

cody pushed a container towards spock, and he took it. then he started stuffing another one with his own leftovers. "i don't know exactly. but it was nice to not have to think about a bunch of stuff for a bit." he popped the lid on his container. 

"after a bit," cody opened the fridge and stuck his container wherever, "i realized you only had me do, like," he pulled himself to sit on the counter, "shit that helped me or was, like, just neutral. i kinda just stopped thinking about anything other than editing because i figured you'd just tell me to do whatever, like eat or take a break or something."

spock was a bit slower packing his food. "so it's like i'm talking care of you?"

"yeah."

after spock was finished packing  his food away, he handed it to cody. he was sitting next to the fridge so he pulled open the door and shoved the container in. he kicked the refrigerator door close and hopped down from the counter.

"was that what you actually wanted to ask me?" cody walked back to couch.

spock hesitated again. it wasn't quick this time.

he sat down with cody, before giving him an answer. "uh, no. not really. i mean, i did. like i was curious. just not what i was meant ask."

"oh. you can ask whatever. i won't get offended or anything."

"it's not that it's like mean or anything. i just, i don't really know, like, where to start, i guess. and i don't want to like overwhelm you with a bunch of shit super suddenly."

maybe this was why noel was insistent on cody talking to spock. maybe he knew spock had a lot to say. did he and spock talk about this?

"we don't really have to talk about everything at once, if you don't want."

"yeah that's true."

spock looked straight ahead, towards the documentary they were watching earlier. but he wasn't really watching it. his eyes weren't focused. he seemed to be just blankly staring at the screen.

"i don't really know how to ask this without it coming out the wrong way."

"what is it?" 

spock still didn't look at cody. "well, we... or, uh, i don't, uh. so, like, we don't need a label or anything. i'm fine without one, but i still don't know what, like, y'know, uh..."

"what we are?"

if this was noel, he'd reach out to grab his hand. maybe put this head on his shoulder. 

it doesn't fix anything, but noel usually relax a bit when cody does that.

"yeah. like i don't know if this is even a thing to you at all."

he doesn't know if he can do that with spock. he doesn't know if it would help. because, as much as cody would like to pretend otherwise, even if their weren't other people in the studio, even if it was just him, spock, and noel - hell, even if noel wasn't there - just about nothing wouldn't changed. 

spock maybe would've said something out loud about his hoodie (which cody found himself curling into himself in it for comfort). but other than that? 

nothing probably.

they didn't have the same relationship as cody and noel. cody can't just hang off of spock's arm like he would with noel and have it be normal.

he wishes he could.

"it is. to me it's something. kinda like the thing with me and noel is something."

he wants to be able to do the same things he does with noel, with spock.

everything is just too new, cody thinks. although the newness of his thing when noel didn't stop them. 

"ok. what does that mean exactly? like obviously i know of your guys' thing, but i don't really know what that means, i guess."

but spock isn't noel. which isn't a difficult thing to figure out or remember. it's just something that is making itself very known in every word of this conversation. 

cody took a breath, "well, we aren't really together, like dating or anything. we both fuck other people," he motioned between himself and spock, "clearly. but like, we're a bit more than just friends with benefits. we're too close to just be friends that fuck sometimes, i think. does that make sense?"

"yeah. is that where you want us to be?"

"yeah. like, if you want that too, i mean."

"i think i do. can i ask something else?" 

"yeah."

"was it weird for noel, too?"

"like, how?"

spock looked over at cody. it forced cody to remember he hadn't really looked at him during this conversation, yet. "like, was fucking around with another guy weird for him at first?"

"kinda. we haven't talked about it much, so you'd need to talk to him about it. but, yeah, it was kinda weird." he pulled his legs under his spock's hoodie, and hugged them to his chest. he rested his head on his knees. "he told me a while ago that it was a little weird, because even though he knew bi, he'd never done anything with a guy before me. he didn't really know what to do, so a lot of the time i'd have to walk him through it."

"oh." was all he heard from spock.

"is it different for you?"

"yeah." spock's voice was a bit more hushed when he continued, "i don't know if i'm gay or bi or whatever. i don't know if i like men."

cody jerked his head up. "what?"

spock just shrugged and looked back to the documentary on the screen.

cody didn't know that. he hadn't considered that spock just doesn't have that figured out.

"i'm sorry man. i wouldn't have, like-"

"no, it's fine."

"it's not!"

"yes, it is, cody. i like doing all that stuff, i wouldn't keep agreeing if i didn't. it's just, like, after - it's not that i regret it or anything, i just get confused. like i don't know if i like guys or just, like. i don't know... you? maybe?"

"oh."

"yeah. and, like, that's why i keep getting so weird. and then, last friday, i just fucking ditched you because i'm dumb about all this shit." spock took a breath. "i feel like such a dick about ev-"

"no!" 

that startled spock a bit. 

which made sense. cody was trying to cut off his rambling. 

"garrett, you're not being a dick. yeah, it sucked waking up alone, but if that was too much then that's fine. you're still figuring your shit out. i'm not gonna hold that against you."

"sorry, by the way. i never did-"

"so don't. you don't need to."

Chapter Text

spock woke up. 

and it definitely wasn't morning. not yet. it was still dark out, at least from what spock could see from the window.

he doesn't really remember falling asleep. they probably got too tired to think about moving before they fell asleep. spock can't think of any other reason why they'd both be slumped over on opposite ends of the couch. 

spock pulled himself to sit up. he felt weird. it was that uncomfortable crawl of stiffness that rakes through you when you sleep in straining positions. but that's what spock gets for sleeping half way off a shitty couch, he guesses. 

cody wasn't much better. cody was actually fully on the couch, but spock couldn't imagine sleeping with your chest pressed to and an arm thrown over the arm of the couch was comfortable. or rather, would be when he woke up. and with how cody's neck was craned, it was probably bad for him too.

he slowly got up and stepped over to the blonde. he put his hand on his shoulder and tried to gently shake him to wake him up. "hey, man. c'mon let's go to bed."

cody groaned. he tried to push himself further back into the couch. keyword being tried.

"dude..."

cody groaned again.

so did spock. 

should he even try to wake him up? probably not. he doubts he'd be successful. or maybe he's just too tired to really try.

he grabbed the blondes arm and side. he pulled him up to stand and cody just leaned against him, making no effort to keep himself up. spock kept his arm around him to guide (or half drag, but y'know, like, semantics or whatever) cody to his room.

it kind of felt like last week. when they were drunk and stumbling to cody's apartment and, eventually, cody's room. except this time, they hadn't drank. at all. they were just tired and spock didn't think they should sleep on the couch.

when they get to cody's room, spock just pushed cody off of him and onto his bed. sure, he cares about cody. enough to move him to his own bed so he doesn't fuck up his neck. but not enough to gently lay him down on his bed when he was absolutely no help in getting there.

spock didn't even take a step before cody lazily threw his arm out at him. more to get his attention than actually grab him. "please don't go."

"i'm not, dude. just going to the other side."

-

spock woke up again. 

this time it was definitely morning, instead of sometime in the dead of night. there was some light coming in from the blinds.

he didn't notice that first. but he did when cody tried to hide his face in his chest because of the light in his eyes when he tried to open them.

and spock didn't feel stiff at all. 

cody was a nice wieght at his side too. he wasn't really sleeping on him. not entirely. his head was on his shoulder. and he had an arm and a leg thrown across spock too. it was kinda nice.

it reminded him of all mornings where he'd woken up to past girlfriends cuddling into him. not that spock thought of cody as a girlfriend or anything like that (or maybe kind of like that). even though he does act like it sometimes.

regardless, he liked moments like this. moments that were kind of familiar. moments that were simple. they were easier to indulge in. they felt more natural. 

he felt like he could just lay there with him. and he did. after he woke up for the second time, it took a while for him to open his eyes. and when he did he still didn't say anything. 

cody was also awake. he didn't say anything for a while either. but he had his hand on spock's other shoulder. cody traced little circles into it with his thumb. 

it was a nice moment and he didn't want it to end. it didn't feel like it would end. it made him feel like everything was normal. like everything with cody was normal. like this was a normal thing that happened.

he knew it wasn't. he kinda hoped it would be at some point. 

cody mumbled a slurred 'good morning' against his chest.

"morning."

"want me to get up?"

"nah." he instinctively tighten his arm around cody's waist a bit. "you're fine right here."

cody shifted a bit. moving to lay on him more. "even like this?"

"yep." he wrapped his arms around cody's back. "but quick question, where's my glasses?" he'd noticed his lack of glasses earlier, just didn't care enough to say something.

"on the nightstand. i saw you still had them on when i woke up to piss."

"mm." he reached over, careful not to move around too much and felt around for them. he slid them up his nose when he did.

"you're lucky i like you. i could've let you sleep with 'em on."

spock snickered. "yeah, i'm the lucky one."

he looked up at spock. "what's that supposed to mean?"

"it means i could've let you fuck up your neck on the couch," he wouldn't have and he's pretty sure cody knew that, "but instead i dragged your ass in here." 

"hmm... you drag a lot of pretty boys to bed at night?" 

that caught spock of guard a bit. he knew it was a joke. knew cody didn't mean anything by it. it just still surprised him how forward cody could be sometimes.

"no, just blonde idiots that i work with sometimes." but he figured cody could take a bit  of that forwardness back.

"hey... that sounds like me." cody drawled.

spock chuckled a bit. "yeah, wonder why."

cody didn't say anything back, just laughed through his nose. he lifted his head to press a kiss to spock's cheek and laid back down. 

it was sweet. 

he liked that. maybe even loved it.

he loved a lot about this. about right now.

he loved being here. in this bed. with cody.

he loved not worrying about what's too much. not worrying about when it's too weird for just being friends.

he loved being able to joke around about this without it feeling too heavy. 

he knows he doesn't have everything, or really anything, figured out. spock couldn't possibly expect to have it all figured out within a week. but it still feels lighter now.   

so so so much lighter.