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Chapter Text

One day some annoying ugly orange fuck was sitting in his gay tacky mansion sucking off his supporters to keep his position of power which he stole from a much more competent leader. A creature so evil even sexy pics of Ironhide couldn't quench his small dicked lust for whoever. Who was this leader you ask? He was Donald Tru-hey wait a second.

*Turns to intern
No. No. This isnt about him, this is about the orange racist who tries to set his people back by years to make up for his gross microsilhallic penis.

Intern: right, Donald Trump.

Ugh no the obnoxious loser who takes credit for better leaders work and only uses his position of power to get what he wants you know the guy who can't get a genuine partner because his personality and body are equally repulsive.

Intern:sir I think you think you just gave the textbook definition of Donald Trump.

Look! It's not trump this guy is way worse he's a racist, hes ugly, he's fat, he's even fucked over his people just for shots and giggles, he even raped someone and fucking laughs about it!

Intern:sir I'm sorry but that all sounds like stuff Trump's done.

No i- GODAMNIT!

*turns back to the story*

It's sentinel alright! Sentinel! We open on fucking sentinel zeta prime! Sentinel was going about his usual tard activities like kicking a puppy, flashing a girl scout, and raping slaves who were far to pretty looking be in the same room as a fat greasy loser like him when all of a sudden he heard a loud crash in his study and "hjönk!"

His fake matrix he had on his desk because he's a fucking stupid crap faced stupi- was broken, h-his fake matrix was broken! He immediately ran around the house while his slaves, gurads, and generally everyone who saw laughed at him for being a dumbass. When he couldn't find the culprit he just gave up and decided to take his rage out on a slave.

Unidentified slave #1:is it in yet?

Sentinel: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!*cums like a Downey*

After that sentinel put his care bear panties on and walked his gay tard walk to go watch a movie when he noticed the remote was missing! He checked everywhere! When all of sudden the TV turned on and it was playing footage of a bunch of protestors gathering around the pound chanting their support of team prime and demanding the cons be released! Sentinel was so mad he punched the TV and broke it with his gigatard strength. He grew increasingly agitated and screamed when he heard another "hjönk, hjönk!" He tried to find the source of this mysterious noise when he finally had the idea to have his fucking guards check the damn security cameras! But something happened, all the wires were disconnected and they couldn't find the footage of that day. Sentinel pinched his nose and gritted out "fragging incompetence."

He assumed it was just an unlucky day and went to go find other things to do, he raped a bunch of slaves who didn't seemed to care since he has a penis the size of a child's clit then something else happened! When he finished on a slave and went to get dressed he noticed his care bear panties were missing! He looked all over the room and saw nothing but the slave who fell asleep from how laughably bad sentinel was in the sac. He peered out in the hallway when he saw the true culprit! The one behind all this weird stuff! It was....

A goose.

Sentinel and the goose stared at each other for fifteen uninterrupted minutes.

Sentinel:"alright whatever you are return, my property and leave then I might forgive your transgressions."

Goose: "hjönk."

Sentinel: "return my property! Now! I am a prime and I will envoke my authority on you!!!!!"

Goose: "hjönk, hjönk!"

Then the goose speed waddled away while sentinel chased him with his penis still out. He chased through the halls across his yard and down the walkway to his house the goose flocked onto a random passing by transport. He decided to give up the chase since it was a stupid animal and was probably no threat to him. He decided he was just greatful the goose was gone and he could finally enjoy a completely unearned day of rest and relaxation. He walked back to his house completely oblivious to all the people pointing and laughing at him and finally sat down to watch some TV now that the tv had been repaired and the remote was back. When he flicked to the news he something interesting. On a podium in front of the protestors Optimus while flanked by his seeker command trine held up sentinels care bear panties while pointing and laughing at how gay, retarded, and all around useless sentinel was. At some point skywarp regaled the crowd with tales of how hilariously small sentinels penis was, when starscream started laughing so hard he doubled over and puked while thundercracker and Optimus held him steady while they and skywarp continued to laugh at the prime and how hilariously pathetic his rule and his penis was.

Sentinel was so mad he had a five year old temper tantrum and shit himself when he tried to March back to his study, he slipped on his shit and fell. The fall broke his arm. Instead of helping him, everyone in his tacky mansion pointed and laughed at him for being a dumbass.

~meanwhile~

On a throne of gold with dried up patches of biggie blood and a discarded torn up orange beanie on one of the thrones pointy bits, sat a goose. The goose looked upon the chaos he caused and hjönked in satisfaction. The first vistim is done let the world prepare for...

THE HJÖNKENING

Chapter Text

The goose checked on his hitlist and saw flatwheel, a new henchmen of sentardnel. Naturally for his many sins he committed by helping sentinel goose knew this would be the new victim of the hjönkening.

Flatwheel was going over the new security plans for sentinels tacky mansion after engaging in cock and ball torture with a slave. It was a bad session since the slave couldn't land a bit due to his equipments laughably small size, and the fact that the slave threw up from the constant scent of shit and cum flatwheel seems to always track with him.

The security plans passed his inspection and looked to be airtight. No one could steal sentinels furry erotica this time. With his official work done he was about to turn to tracking flashwing and the wreckers using questionable resources and tactics when he heard a noise coming from outside his office followed by a large 'THUNK' he went to investigate and saw that his waiting room trashed he followed the damage when he heard that noise again.

"Hjönk!"

He went to the source of the noise and saw on top his hidden grey hidden file cabinet, filled to the brim with important documents of his plans and contact information on the remaining sirens was a goose. They stared each other down. When flatwheel tried to reason with the goose.

"Okay little animal, I don't know how you stumbled in here but those are very important documents you are holding, return them peacefully or I'll have to use my authority to have you arrested, trust me you will not have a good time, hand it over."

"Hjönk!"

"Give it!"

"Hjönk!"

"Now!"

"Hjönk! Hjönk!"

"Come on!"

" Hjönk! Hjönk! Hjönk! "

Flatwheel decided this animal was either messing with him or just didn't understand since it was an animal. He then pulled out out a gun but when he reached for his gun instead he pulled out, a banana?

Then the goose pulled out flatwheels gun, turned off the safety, then took aim.

"WHAT THE FU-"

*BLAM*

flatwheel was thusly filled with led. He fell to the floor, frame greying, nonfunctional. The goose stared at the body and let out a hjönk. He left the scene and walked over the the piles upon piles of broken furniture, jake paul merch and other token failure things one could see in flatwheels office.

It was reported that an official of the cybetronian government had been assassinated in close proximity to the primes mansion. The public responded with cries of who gives a shit since no one cared about sentinel and his stupid, fucking dumbass, retarded, fuck knuckles, cock sucking shit spewing, fuckboi, useless, failed abortion, tax dodging, horse sploodge drinking, knuckle dragging, monkey fucking...followers.

With Optimus and the true autobots gaining a following on cybertron not a lot of people have a shit about the news and with good reason.

The goose meanwhile shared off into the sunset and returned to the heavens and as he approached his stolen throne, he stared, there was a real sense of something being amiss when he sat upon his throne and let a satisfied hjönk.

None of that mattered, the latest victim of the hjönkening has been eliminated. He sat upon his throne and waited for the next victim of the hjönkening to make their presence known on his list.