Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"My troubles can't be washed away," Zuko said.

"By water, perhaps not," Maedhros said.  Everyone turned to look at him.  "I have found lava to be an effective tool for getting rid of problems."

Zuko didn't have an opportunity to try to figure out what he meant when Fingon grabbed Maedhros' arm and dragged him away.  Zuko looked back at Uncle, who looked as confused as he felt.

"Jumping in lava was not a good reaction to that and if you ever think of doing that again I will personally...."

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Sokka looked at them in confusion.  Ever since the spider hole everyone had been talking about some pretty specific events that he had no idea about.  And now Elros shows up and saves them and they talk about more things Sokka doesn't know.  Now they were whispering, probably about more stuff he didn't know.

Finally, they finished their secret conversation and turned to face him.  Maedhros laid down and closed his eyes.  Sokka turned towards Elros.  "What do you want to know?" Elros asked.

"Everything, from the beginning," Sokka said.

Elros nodded.  "I don't really know everything because neither him," he gestured over to Maedhros, who waved, "or Maglor ever told us fully how we had gotten to that point.  I know he had five other brothers and had sworn an oath to get the silmarils, which his father had made."  Maedhros said he had six brothers, so maybe Maglor was the name of one of them?  Maybe the silmarils were some kind of...Sokka really didn't know.

"My mom had one of the silmarils, but when Maedhros and Maglor asked for it she said no and jumped off a cliff, turned into a bird, flew to my dad who was trying to get to Valinor, gave him a silmaril, and he turned into a star," Elros said.  That made no sense at all.  Elros looked at his expression and laughed.  "It really did happen," he said.  "If I hadn't been there I wouldn't have believed it."

Sokka still didn't believe that someone had turned into a bird and the other person a star.  It just wasn't possible.  Things like that didn't happen to people.  "Maglor found us, me and my brother Elrond, and ended up raising us with Maedhros.  He taught us sword fighting and how to be diplomatic, while Maglor taught us how to use the harp and sing, as well as how to bake actual good food."  

Now that Elros was talking, Maedhros didn't exactly sound like the backstabbing Fire Nation spy Katara had explained him as.  "What about the burn on his hand? And the whole volcano thing you had mentioned earlier?" Sokka asked.

"Well, there was a huge war in which everything finally managed to turn out okay.  Maglor and Maedhros got the silmarils back, except they burned them.  Maglor threw his into the ocean and continues to wander the beaches, and Maedhros jumped into a volcano," Elros said.  "He must have been reborn at some point, otherwise he would not have been able to get into this situation and I would not have seen him."  He cleared his throat and looked over at Maedhros, who had fallen asleep as they talked.

It didn't really sound like Maedhros was a bad person.  He still didn't understand what the murder and torture stories were.  It sounded like he was a pretty good guy.  "Does he have any good stories?  I was trying to get him to tell me earlier and he wouldn't," Sokka asked.

Elros grinned.  "Maedhros actually kept a stache of baked goods in the corner of his room.  Once, Elrond and I found them and ate everything in one sitting.  We got pretty sick afterwards but it was worth it.  He never actually moved the stache, he just started making sure he locked his door," Elros said.  "Another time, we braided his hair to his bedpost.  Maglor had to go up and help him unbraid it.  He was not happy and was determined not to fall asleep anywhere near us."

Elros looked back at Maedhros and lowered his voice, leaning towards Sokka.   "He didn't sleep for days, when Maglor tried to get him to sleep he ranted about how Maglor had never gone to bed at reasonable times in Valinor.  He was walking and tripped, the second he hit the floor he had actually fallen asleep," he whispered.

Sokka barked out a startled laugh.  Next time they were chased down by Zuko, he was going to have to find a way to use his new blackmail material.  Mawdhros had woken up and was looking at them in amusement.  "Is there a reason you're whispering, Elros?" he asked.

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Aang guided Appa away from Kyoshi.  He looked down at the burning wreckage and the figure of Zuko and his soldiers running back down to their boat.  He wished that he had time to stay and put out the fires, but they were overpowered.  They had barely made it out of there.  Aang shuddered to think of what might have happened if they hadn't made it out.

"Ow, Katara that hurts," Sokka whined as she cleaned out his cuts.

Katara gently smacked the back of Sokka's head.  "Maybe if you hadn't gone up against people clearly out of your league you wouldn't be in this much pain," she said crossly. 

Aang turned around to face the siblings.  "It turns out they really were spies after all," he said sadly.  He was so sure they weren't and him not knowing for sure had ended up with Kyoshi being attacked.  Aang felt terrible.  He had never meant for anyone to get hurt.

"On the bright side, they can't trick us again," Sokka said.  Aang shrugged, he guessed Sokka was right.  Except he still made a mistake that had hurt people.  Luckily, it didn't look like anyone had died.

Katara finished wrapping up Sokka and looked at Aang.  "Did you get hurt anywhere?" she asked.  Aang shook his head.  He had deflected anything that was sent his way and no one had gotten close enough to cut him.  Katara nodded and put away what was left of their medical supplies.  "We'll need to get more next time we stop," she commented.

Aang looked at Katara.  "You seem to be taking this rather well," he commented.  "I would've thought you would have been more upset, seeing as you've spent more time with them than any of us."

Katara shoved the bag forcefully away from her. It looked like she was actually angry.  "Of course I'm angry! I trusted them, I thought Fingon was nice ," she yelled.  Crossing her arms she glared down at the rapidly fading village.  "But it turned out they were just Fire Nation spies using us to help Zuko."

Aang didn't know what to do.  They couldn't undo the damage the firebenders had caused to Kyoshi Island.  "Maybe they're nice people in a bad situation.  They might not know what they were doing was wrong," he offered.  He didn't get to spend that much time with them, but Fingon seemed nice enough.  Maedhros looked a little scary but that might just be due to the scars and his missing hand.

"Let's just focus on getting to the North Pole.  We'll be able to fight them better once we learn proper bending," Katara said.  Aang hoped they wouldn't have to fight the men again, although they might not have a choice if they were attacked again.  Besides, he and Katara needed a waterbending master.

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"What happened there?" Aang asked as they flew over the trees.  Sokka thought over the encounter with the giant spider and then Maedhros' adopted son.

"You know, I'm not completely sure," he said.  He was having a hard time believing what had happened and he was there for it.  "There was a giant spider and apparently Maedhros has a son," he said.

Katara looked surprised.  "He has a son ?" she asked in disbelief.

Sokka nodded.  "Adopted.  Apparently his father is a star and his mom is a bird," he said.  Saying it outloud made it sound even more ridiculous.  "And he really didn't seem to be an evil Fire Nation fanatic," he added.  Maedhros didn't act like Zuko.  He seemed a little annoyed, but did tell Sokka to get away from the creepy giant spider.

"He was probably just trying to get you to like him so that he could capture you and bring you to Zuko," Katara said.  She really wasn't taking what happened at Kyoshi well.  On the off chance that Maedhros ever wanted to leave Zuko and help them, he was betting Katara would say no.  Even if they needed him, she really didn't take people betraying her or lying well.  It was always better to be honest with Katara, Sokka had learned that lesson with a lot of frozen snowball attacks.

"The thing was, he doesn't sound like he would do that.  Not from what Elros told me," Sokka said.

"What did Elros tell you?" Aang asked cheerfully.  Sokka doubted anything could get this kid down.  He was always optimist, it must be a talent.

"Who's Elros?" Katara asked suspiciously.

"Maedhros' adopted son.  Now, are you going to let me tell you my story?" Sokka asked.  Katara and Aang nodded.  Sokka cleared his throat, the story would be better if they had a fire and weren't on Appa.  He would have to tell it again when they were in a proper campsite, and he would add a lot of embellishments.  A proper campfire story was never completely what had happened.  You needed to have unbelievable heroic acts and sound as powerful as someone like the Avatar.

Maybe not Aang, one of the cool Avatar's.  "I met Maedhros when I was wandering in the Spirit Swamp," he began.  "I asked him to tell a story from his childhood, but be just said it was all murdery."

"I never actually got him to tell me a story," Sokka commented. If he had the opportunity he was going to get Maedhros to tell him one.  Maybe after the war when they wouldn't need to be fighting each other anymore.  "Anyways, we continued walking and Maedhros stumbled into a huge spider web."

Now it was time for Sokka to shine.  He would keep the important bits of dialogue the same, but he needed to make it sound more exciting than it actually was.  "It was huge and seemed to suck the very light out of the air," he said.  "If it had been just any normal spider, I could have killed it with ease and we would be able to continue hunting for a way out of the Spirit World," Sokka said. "However, this spider could talk, and knew Maedhros," he said, lowering his voice.

Aang was leaning forward, eager for more of Sokka's story.  Katara looked slightly amused, it wasn't like Sokka was straying that far from what had happened.  "She named Maedhros from past titles, and layed a deadly spell! With every foul word it became harder for Maedhros to leave.  If I hadn't been there with my trusty boomerang, he would have fallen under the spider's spell."

"What did she call him?" Katara asked.

Sokka cleared his throat and did his best imitation of the spider's voice, "A doomed elf bound by an oath.  A broken kinslayer.  I will deliver you to the void where you belong!"

Aang and Katara gasped.  "With him unable to fight back the spider attacked!  Luckily, I was there and his son heard his calls for help.  Together, we beat back the spider and carried Maedhros back to Elros' camp," he said.

"We cared for his wounds and Elros told me of Maedhros' life," Sokka said.  "He had six brothers and they had all sworn to regain the silmarils, whatever those are.  Elros' mom had one but she didn't give it up and jumped off a cliff, turning into a bird, and carried the silmaril to his dad, who turned into a star.  I'm pretty sure that isn't true but that's all that Elros told me."

"Although, Maedhros has a sweet tooth, and Elros once tied his hair to his bed," Sokka said.  Aang laughed and Katara managed to look both angry and amused.  "Given that information, I really don't think Maedhros is that bad of a person," he added.

"The spider called him a kinslayer!" Katara said, her expression was settling on an annoyed angry.

"Do you really think the spider was telling the truth?" Aang asked. "Not all spirits always tell you all the facts," he added.  Sokka nodded, except he was pretty sure the spider wasn't lying.  He wasn't going to tell Aang that, though.

"Yeah," Sokka said in agreement.  Aang always looked for the best in people.

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Fingon followed Maedhros into their shared room aboard the swan boat.  "I should have tried harder to stop my father," he said.

"You did all you could," Fingon said gently and walked up to Maedhros.

"I didn't do enough," he said bitterly.  "I didn't accomplish anything useful to anyone during the First Age.  I couldn't save my brothers, I couldn't lead when I was supposed to, and I wasn't strong enough to stay alive."

Fingon gently grabbed Maedhros' arm.  There was no denying Maehros hadn't made the smartest decisions, but he was being driven by the oath he had sworn.  "There are many things we can wish to have done better, but we cannot change them now," he said.

"We could hear him as he burned," Maedhros said quietly.  "I tried to get closer to help him.  To save him from the fire but I couldn't get close enough."  Fingon watched as tears leaked out of his closed eyes.  It was strange to see Maedhros cry, he rarely ever did.  "His body was so small ," he said.

Maedhros swallowed and took a shuddering breath.  "They all looked small," he said.  Fingon gently led Maedhros to sit down on the bed and wrapped the elf in a hug.  It would have worked better had he been taller, but Fingon made do.

"I know," Fingon said softly.

Maedhros clung to Fingon and finally allowed himself to cry after centuries.  Fingon closed his eyes and mourned with the tall elf.  They stayed on the bed for hours before Maedhros pulled away.  "Sorry, it happened a while ago I shouldn't be this upset about it," he said.

Sometimes, Fingon wanted to try to hit some sense into Maedhros.  He had watched his family die without having a lot of time to move past that and find peace.  If Fingon was in the same position he would still be upset.  "Maitimo," he said.  Fingon rarely used Maedhros' mother name, normally using Nelyafinwë or Russandol, but sometimes Maedhros needed to hear it.  "You were given very little time to properly mourn your family, there is no reason why you should apologize for still being upset."

Maedhrks frowned, but didn't argue with Fingon.  "We are still expected for music night," he said, changing the subject.

"Yeah, shall we join everyone?"

"Now or never," Maedhros said as they walked to the ladder that would bring them to the deck of Zuko's ship.