Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

"This is it," I stop in front of a light brown door covered in scratches, and the numbers 4-66 barely visible on the plaque and place the box I'm carrying gently on the floor. Poe trudges up behind me pulling a suitcase with one arm and balancing a box with the other arm. He has two duffles crisscrossed across his body which hold my bedding making him look like a pack mule.

I fumble with the keys and shove the largest one into the keyhole. I jiggle the key but the lock doesn't budge. "No that's fine, take your time," Poe says flatly as he sets the suitcase up so it sits flat on the ground and shifts the box in his arms.

I jiggle the key again, this time trying to turn the handle at the same time. The door suddenly flies open and I stumble over the box in front of me.

"You must be Rey," a voice says and I look up at a tall, thin, blonde with a shoulder-length choppy hair cut looking down on me. Her smile is huge and her eyes crinkle up just slightly emphasizing her friendliness. "I'm Gwen Phasma," the girl takes my hand and shakes it.

"Here," she says as she picks the box in front of me up off the ground and hands it to a redheaded man with a small pointed face standing behind her. "This door is a real pain. Let me show you." She steps into the hall, taking the key from my hand and closing the door behind her.

"It took me way too many tries to get in. It didn't help that Hux was critiquing every attempt I made over my shoulder. He's kind of a control freak," she whispers the last part to me.

"I heard that," a defensive voice yells from the other side.

I glance back over my shoulder at Poe and he shrugs.

"So here's the trick. You have to push the door forward to get the key to move," she pushes and turns simultaneously, "then when it gets stuck about halfway around, you have to pull the door towards you to turn the key the rest of the way." As she does this, the door clicks and she pushes the door open. "You'll get it, I had to practice a couple of times."

"Thanks," I say, following her into the room. The walls are plain brick with a large sliding window on the far side of the room opposite the door, the room is symmetrical with a bed, desk, and dresser on each side with a closet built-in on either side of the door. The room isn't much but it is definitely more than I have back home with my foster parents who I hadn't even been living with since I graduated High School. Frankly, I don't even know if they knew I was moving to college today. Thank goodness for Poe or I wouldn't have made it in time to make it to the beginning of freshman orientation.

"So I'm guessing that's your side?" I gesture towards the piles of boxes and suitcases laying across the bed and desk and covering the floor.

"Oh actually I just threw them there, I really have no preference so I was waiting for you to get here. We could always change the layout and loft the beds if we wanted to as well." She says holding a handful of pegs and bed extenders. "I have a futon I can have him bring over while we're at orientation along with a mini-fridge and tv." She says gesturing towards the redhead behind her.

"Yeah, that would work. I'm not crazy about bunk beds." Years of foster care had turned me off from those. "I've seen it where people loft the beds with the futon below one and the tv under another. I think that would work great. Then you can just keep all of your stuff over there." I motion at the large pile she has brought with her. I wonder if the redhead had to carry all of that up. He seems pretty scrawny so I'm sure that would have been a sight.

"Love it!" She proclaims. I take my backpack off as Gwen starts giving instructions to the redhead about how to loft the furniture and where to put everything. "Do you mind if I give him the key while we're gone so they can bring more stuff in?"

"No, not at all. It's not like there's much to take on my side anyways." I say as I switch out of my shoes and start unpacking some of my clothes into the dresser while Poe sprawls across my mattress. I unload my two boxes and my suitcase, my clothes only taking up two of the drawers and hang my coat and one dress in the closet so they don't wrinkle. Gwen keeps unloading items from her bags and boxes and I wonder where she is going to put everything as her closet is already overflowing. I have a little more stuff at my foster parent's house assuming they didn't throw it out already, I just haven't had the motivation to go back and get it.

"Shoot, orientation starts in ten minutes!" Gwen says as a bing comes from her phone. "Are you two ready to go? She looks at me and Poe."

"I'm a Sophomore so I'm headed home actually," Poe says as he stands and puts his shoes back on.

"Oh, so is Hux," Gwen says motioning to the redhead. "I'm the worst, I never introduced you. Rey, this is Hux. He's my boyfriend. His name is actually Dominic but he and his friends have this weird thing where they go by their last names because they think it makes them cool or something."

"Nice to meet you." I acknowledge him with a nod and slide my sandals on.

"Yeah, you too." Hux mumbles and glances at Poe. "So are you two...."

"Friends." I cut him off.

"Ah," Hux says looking between Poe and me awkwardly and I fumble for something to say.

"Anyways... I'm going." Poe breaks the silence. "Gwen, nice to meet you. Rey, text me later. Hux," Poe pauses and looks at him, "See ya around I guess."

"Ready?" Gwen turns to me and I nod. She turns to Hux and gives him a quick peck. "I'll see you later. Here's the key so you and Ren can bring the furniture over."

"You think he'll willingly help?" Hux scoffs.

"Just remind him how much dirt I have on him and he will," Gwen says with an amount of sass I haven't seen in many people as I follow her out the door.

We chat on our short walk to the main lawn where orientation is happening and exchange phone numbers. Gwen walks with such confidence and it's almost impossible to keep up with her long strides. She tells me she's from Canto and went to Central High School and that's how she knows Hux. Apparently they didn't attend the same High School because the zoning line went right down their street so the south side of the street went to Central and the North side went to North High School like Hux. They just knew each other because they lived four houses down from one another. She asks me where I'm from and I give her the CliffsNotes version of my background from my foster parents, to my high school in the rough part of town, my scholarship, and the art teacher who helped me get it.

When we reach the main lawn, we look out across the busy green space crawling with people. We find two open seats towards the side of the group and wait for the speakers to start the presentation. Right on time, a middle-aged woman with brown hair braided and wrapped in a bun at the nape of her neck takes the stage. She looks out over the crowd with a soft expression taking in all of the new faces. The crowd of freshman students slowly quiets down and she smiles at us.

"Welcome, I am Dr. Organa. The president of the School. I am so pleased to be welcoming our new class of 2024 today." Everyone claps softly and she waits. "I could bore you with my words that I can guarantee would go in in one ear and right out the other, but I'll refrain and we'll move on to the more exciting parts. So to start, we are going to break you off into your Cultural Seminar groups. These are the fun first-year classes you signed up for that are meant to help you acclimate to the school. You will receive grades for the topical classwork, however, your professor will be doing weekly check-ins with you to make sure you're getting settled and doing ok. There will also be a student mentor who is a Sophomore or Junior assigned to your class that will act as a TA and will also be checking in with you regularly. So, when I say go, I would like you to check your name tag that I hope you all are wearing and proceed to the room listed next to the name of your Cultural Seminar. The maps we emailed to you yesterday and gave you in your welcome packet will come in handy. Have a wonderful first day everyone." Dr.Organa smiles and walks off the stage.

The large group of new students buzzes with activity as everyone checks where they were going and starts moving the various directions to their class. I look down, grabbing the laminated tag hanging from my blue lanyard and read the back. I registered for classes so long ago, I don't even remember what I signed up for.

Music in the Movies with Dr. Williams - Music Building Room X

"Where are you headed?" Gwen stands up and starts walking with me.

"The Music Building. You?"

"I'm headed to The Humanities building for Mysticism with Dr. Skywalker. I'll catch you later okay?"

"Okay, see ya!" I smile and we part ways.

Pulling up the map on my phone, I look around to try to get my bearings. I look up at the tall brick building in front of me registering it as Main Hall which means according to the map, the music building should be diagonal across the lawn. The crowd is beginning to thin and I make my way towards the Music building, weaving between everyone.

I reach the door of the Music building and heave the heavy metal door open. A musty smell hits me almost as fast as the cool air does. I weave my way through the hallways and notice all of the rooms start with a number one 1 which doesn't help me at all considering my classroom is one singular letter. I spot a boy at the end of the hall with black hair swept back from his face working on his laptop at a desk and decide that he can maybe help me because he doesn't seem like a freshman. "Excuse me." I say as I approach "Could you help me find my...."

"Williams or Kenobi?" He cuts me off, not even looking up from his laptop.

"Uh." I pause. "Williams."

"Down the stairs and to the left." He looks up at me, flipping his hair back, his dark eyes piercing through me. "Letters downstairs. 100's this level, 200's upstairs."

"Thanks." I squeak out and walk away. I can feel him watching me and I dart through the door at the end of the hall.

I follow his instructions and find the room labeled "X" and enter. There's a man with a round face, a short nose, glasses, and a short white beard sitting at the podium at the front. "Wait don't tell me," he says excitedly as he squints at me, and everyone in the room stares at me. "Rey," He says finally.

"Yes. How did you..."

"I use flashcards and learn you all before you show up." He waves them proudly in the air. "I only got one wrong and that's because she changed her hair." He motions to a girl in the front with bright blue hair. "Please, take a seat."

I thank him and make my way to the back of the room to the only open seat left. I sit down and the girl next to me immediately turns and smiles at me. She's small with olive skin and dark hair. "Hi," she says to get my attention. "I'm rose, and this is Finn." She motions to a boy with a dark complexion and hair in short dreads sitting on the other side of her.

"Rey," I say nodding at them.

"Nice to meet you," Finn says reaching across and shaking my hand.

"What's your major?" Rose asks, not breaking eye contact and still smiling.

"Uh, Art," I say, unsure as to why I had to think about my answer.

"Awesome! I'm a theatre major so we'll be in the same building! They're connected by a tunnel." Rose chirps. "Finn is a Science major so he'll be on the other side of the campus with the other nerds."

"Hey!" Finn protests.

"Good afternoon class." Dr. Williams stands up and dims the lights. "So Dr. Organa wants us to welcome you by doing ice breakers, and well, that just isn't my thing. So we're going to do something else."

He walks over to the piano and sits down. "Take out a piece of paper and a pencil. I'm going to play a tune and you're going to silently guess what movie it belongs to. Keyword Silently." He gives a look. "I'm going to collect them at the end of the hour and use these to see where you all are with your movie music trivia and for every point you get right, you get extra credit on your final at the end of the semester."

Rose makes a "score" motion and smiles at me.

"If you have me for other classes, don't get used to this. I'm only doing this because Dr. Organa makes me."

He starts playing music and I number my paper 1 to 20. Between my years of mediocre foster parents and countless hours sitting in the social services office, I had been exposed to hundreds of movies and their themes. He started out with Indian Jones and moved on to E.T. At one point he stopped and looked at us and said "if you don't get this, just know I'm judging you," and began to play the Jaws theme. By the end of the class, I was sure I had most of them if not all of them figured out.

"Alright." Dr. Williams says as he stands up and smooths out his pants. "My TA will collect all of these from you as you leave the room. Actually, Ben." He motions to someone standing at the back of the room. "Would you mind introducing yourself, please. He is your assigned student mentor. If you have questions, you should feel comfortable asking him. Every week, you will all be required to somehow check in with him so he can track your progress."

The same tall boy from the hallway upstairs pushes himself off from the back wall where he was leaning and makes his way up to the front of the room. I can't tell if it's because he's uncomfortable or if it's just because of his height, but he slouches his shoulders forward slightly and shoves his hands into his jacket pockets. He wears black boots with dark wash jeans, a worn grey t-shirt, and a black motorcycle fabric riding jacket. His unruly dark brown, almost black hair is still swept backward off of his forehead, yet he runs his hand through it again. A bunch of the girls perk up at the sight of him and raise their eyebrows at each other.

"You guys can call me Kylo, I rarely go by my actual name so I won't hear you if you say it. I'm a sophomore photo major with a music minor." He looks at the professor for more prompting. Dr. Williams motions for him to continue but when it's clear he's not going to, he sighs.

"Alright everyone, Ben, or as he likes to call himself, Kylo, will collect all of your papers as you leave, please make sure you have your name on it. Have a great day."

I stand up taking my phone back from Rose after she saves her number in it and calls herself to make sure she can get a hold of me later. I've been fortunate to meet such friendly people who want to get to know me because I was so worried I wouldn't meet anyone and feel alone again. Rose tells me that she and Finn are going to grab dinner and finish a couple of things before the evening program put on by the orientation mentors starts, but that we should meet up later. I agree and make my way to the door.

Ben glances at me over the students in front of me as he takes their papers wordlessly. I approach him slowly, studying his face as he focuses on the papers. His features are sharp and prominent giving him a hard edge. I hand him my paper and smile sweetly, thanking him for his help earlier and he grunts what I can only assume is "you're welcome" back at me. So much for a friendly student mentor.

I make my way back to the dorm, grabbing a sandwich on the way from a cafe and find the room exactly as it was when I left despite what Gwen said about Hux and his friend bringing the furniture over today. I pull out my phone and text Gwen quickly.

Rey: 'Hey, was Hux going to bring furniture? Nothing's here and I wanted to get my bed set up before the show tonight.'

I lay back on the mattress waiting for her response.

Gwen: 'Sorry! I forgot! Hux text and told me that Ren wasn't free so they'll do it tomorrow. Btw, I'm grabbing dinner with them right now if you want anything? Otherwise, I'll stop by before the show and we can walk together again.'

Rey: 'Np, I'll make my bed and no thanks. I grabbed some food on the way back.'

I grab my sandwich and start eating it. My phone buzzes again and I grab it expecting it to be Gwen again but it's an unknown number.

Unknown: 'Hello, this is Kylo, your student mentor. If you need anything, you can text me here, but please don't call. The welcome show starts at 8 tonight. Have a great first day of classes tomorrow.'

Obviously a form text he sent to all 20 of us in the class. I'll have to compare with Rose and see if she got the same boring message with no attempt to add excitement. I finish my sandwich and lay back to take a nap while I wait for Gwen to get back, enjoying having a little time to myself for a bit.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

"Ready to go sleepyhead?" Gwen chirps as she walks back into the room following her dinner of campus.

"Yeah, just let me brush my teeth and change my shirt," I roll over to check the clock and see that we still have 30 minutes so I grab my toiletry bag and make my way down to the bathroom. When I get back, Gwen is sitting on the edge of her freshly made bed. She has a beautiful bed set putting my hand me down sheets and quilt to shame.

"So how was your first class?' She questions.

"It was good. We did a fun activity and the professor seemed chill. I even made a new friend."

"That's awesome!" She smiles at me. "My class was filled with all boys so I didn't really make any friends."

"Funny story though," She says as she locks the door behind us and we head down the hallway together. "Hux's best friend is a student mentor for one of the freshman classes. He's so not a people person but his mom who works for the college forced him to do it so he's stuck. Anyways, Hux is always trying to get him a girlfriend so at dinner tonight Hux was asking if there were any cute girls in the class he is a Mentor for and he actually got him flustered. It was so funny. This guy clammed up and turned beet red. Made my night. So now, I'm on a mission to find out who this girl is and get them together. Want to help?" She has a mischievous grin.

"That is funny," I chuckle at the idea of this upperclassman getting flustered over a freshman. "What class does he Mentor for?"

"I don't know. Probably something in the art department because that's where he apparently always is. The kid never talks about himself so it's hard to know what he's up to."

"Well, I'll definitely keep my eye out then since I'll probably be spending a lot of time there."

Shortly after getting to the performance hall, Rose and Finn find us and sit down. Rose and Gwen immediately hit it off, talking each other's ears off with me stuck in the middle while Finn taps away at some game on his phone. The welcome show turns out to be a variety show put on by all of the student mentors. They all participate in a funny skit about general rules and college survival tips, some of them perform random musical numbers, but most of them just participate in the funny SNL style skits. It's obvious the groups that put a lot of work in and the ones who just scrapped it together last second. The weird part though is that I'm not able to find Ben up there in any of the skits. It isn't really all that surprising though because after how awkward he was in class, something like this definitely doesn't seem like something he would enjoy.

Gwen flips her wrist up and reads a message on her smartwatch. "Hux and his friend Ren are picking me up to go get ice cream if you want to come with?" She whispers to me towards the end of the show. I nod back.

We say goodbye to Finn and Rose, and I promise to grab lunch with them tomorrow and make our way outside. "He drives a black Jeep Wrangler," Gwen says searching the parking lot.

"Who?"

"Ren," She says as she points to a Jeep making its way along the parking lot rows towards us. The entirety of the Jeep is black all the way to the window tint, which I can guarantee you is too dark to be legal. Hux rolls his window down and motions for us to get in and it comes to a stop in front of us. Gwen pulls herself up onto the step and gives him a quick peck before opening the back door and climbing in, leaving the door open for me to get in behind her. I pull myself up in, close the door behind me, and look at the driver Gwen keeps referring to as Ren.

"Ben?" I say in a shocked tone.

He turns his head quickly and looks at me with wide eyes. "Lost girl? You're Gwen's roommate?" Great, I have a nickname already.

"Ben?" Hux says excitedly and spins in his seat, a mischievous grin forming on his face. "How do you two know each other?"

"I found her lost in the music building," Ben mumbles as he pulls out of the parking lot.

"Kylo is actually the student mentor for my class," I add making sure to switch to the name he prefers. Don't need to make any more bad first impressions.

"Is that so?" Gwen and Hux look at each other and raise their eyebrows.

"Didn't you say something about a small brunette that caught your attention, Ren?" Hux jeers.

"No," Ben snips.

"You definitely did," Gwen pokes his arm from behind.

"Someone better tell me where we're going before I drop you pains in the ass off at the dorms and go home."

"Kopps," Hux says and turns himself forward in the seat again as Ben turns the radio up to stop the conversation from continuing.

Gwen looks over at me and winks with her sly smile again. They can't really think that the girl who got Ben flustered at dinner is me. I'm super plain and don't wear much makeup and my clothes are all hand-me-downs. There is no chance that I stood out in class today especially compared to a few of the other girls I saw there.

Not to mention the lack of meat on my bones from years of missing meals at my foster parents. It's not that the Unkars intentionally didn't feed me when I was younger, but most of the time I didn't like what they served because Mr.Unkar was obsessed with things like Meatloaf. I absolutely despise meatloaf. By the time I was in high school, they did actually stop feeding me so I started fending for myself and keeping cheap foods hidden in my room. I had a job down the road working for a small mechanic shop during high school. They gave me small jobs like working on lawnmowers and ATVs because I didn't need to have a ton of knowledge of cars to figure those engines out. It wasn't a glamorous job but it paid okay and helped me save to get out of the Unkar's house.

That job paired with my studies saved me. I barely slept during my Junior and Senior year but I was able to acquire a full ride to school for my art based on my AP portfolio. I applied to every scholarship that was available to me and for the full ride, we were required to submit our AP portfolio and someone on the headboard of the school picked a student. Somehow mine caught their attention and they picked me. There isn't any other way I could have afforded this private school otherwise.

As Ben drives down the wide road through the neighboring town, I take in my surroundings out the window. This is a high-end town, filled with beautiful glass buildings, designer shops in every strip mall, and shiny new cars filling the parking lots. While Canto is one of the richest towns in the areas and only thirty minutes from where I grew up, I had never been able to get my foster parents to bring me here. They frequented the area for dinner but I was always told I would stick out too much so they wouldn't bring me.

Ben's POV

What is Hux's problem? I told him that there wasn't a girl and yet he proceeds to embarrass me like that. Yes, she caught my attention but it was nothing more than an initial attraction. When she asked me for directions and I looked up at her in the music hall, I just felt a slight pull. She has a perfect little face with a dainty nose, perfect almond-shaped eyes, and cute little plump lips. When she smiled during class at her friends, it overtook her face and lit up the room. She was pretty, I'll give her that, but so plain and definitely not my type. Not to mention a freshman and I knew better than to go for a student who was one of my Mentees.

I pull up to Kopps's and everyone gets out. Hux, Gwen, and I have no problem getting out of the jeep gracefully but Rey with her short legs pretty much tumbles out of the door. "Long way to the ground," I mock through the still open doors.

She shoots me a look through the Jeep and turns away, slamming the door behind her.

"Hey, I'm going to run and grab something from the gas station across the street." Gwen gestures to the green and white gas station. "Hux, can you come with me?"

"Yeah," He responds as he grabs her hand. "Ren, can you order us two chocolate shakes?"

"Uh, sure. I guess," I agree as I run my hand through my hair and look over at Rey. She shrugs and walks inside, her ponytail bouncing behind her.

We stand awkwardly next to each other as she reads the menu above the register and when one opens up, I motion for her to follow me. "That's okay, I can get myself." She doesn't move, just keeps her arms crossed and stares up at the menu above her head.

"Come on, I'm getting them, I can get you too," I assure and she raises an eyebrow at me. "My treat for one of my student mentees. Come on." She sighs and follows me to the counter, and I can feel her watching me apprehensively from behind.

I order a turtle sundae for myself and the two shakes for Gwen and Hux, before I turn to her and wait as she orders a scoop of vanilla.

"That's it?" I look at her.

"Yeah," she says sheepishly, not making eye contact.

"No, it's not. Do you like caramel?" She looks up at me and nods. "Cashews?" she nods again. I turn back to the register "she'll have a small caramel cashew sundae instead." The lady at the register looks at Rey and she nods back at her in confirmation.

"You want to go find somewhere to sit? I'll bring the ice cream over," I ask her and she walks off to the next room without looking at me or responding, but I take her silence as compliance to the plan.

Rey's POV

I walk into the loud room with all the tables and find that they're all full, families and teenagers filling most of them. Through the window, I can see an empty table outside on the patio and make my way out there. I look across the street and can see Gwen's blonde hair through the window and pray that she comes back soon and releases me from this awkwardness before Ben is able to make it out here.

Ben finds me sitting outside and carries over a tray with the ice cream. He sets the tray down and hands me a spoon followed by my sundae. The warm caramel is already melting and mixing with the ice cream and I take a large bite, filling my mouth. "That's so good," I mumble as I take another bite.

"Have you never had a caramel cashew sundae?" Ben asks, amused.

"No, when I got ice cream, it was only ever vanilla."

"Your parents never bought you ice cream other than vanilla?" He looks at me with disbelief.

"No, they didn't," I say looking further into my ice cream. "They're my foster parents and I believe they only took care of me for the check. They never really bought anything for me."

"Oh," Ben says softly and shoves another bite into his mouth. "So where are you from then?"

I pause. I hate it when people ask me this. "Jakku."

Ben snorts. "North side or the south side?"

I roll my eyes at him in distaste. "North"

"Damn, that's some bad luck isn't it," he says, a cheeky grin spreading across his face.

"I guess." I just wish I could melt into my ice cream and escape this conversation.

"Our very own Jakku princess." He smirks into his ice cream. My High School's mascot in Jakku was the Royals so other high schools in the area had a great time making fun of that.

At that, I had had enough. I leave my ice cream on the table and stand up causing Ben to look up at me, startled by my sudden movement. "I'm going to go. Thanks for the ice cream." I motion at the ice cream and walk away.

"Hey wait. I didn't mean I...." Ben stands up slightly from the table.

"No one "ever does" but it always comes out of their mouth." I spin around and cut him off. "I'm going to call my friend and have him come get me. You will not follow me. See you Wednesday in class."

I storm off towards the gas station as Ben stands by the table and watches me walk away. Gwen and Hux, who are walking back across the street from the gas station see me and trying to get me to stop.

"Rey! What's wrong?" She grabs my arm in the middle of the crosswalk.

"Ask Kylo." I pull my arm away aggressively. "I'll see you back in the room. I'm calling Poe."

I storm away again and I can sense her trying to figure out if she should follow me. As I get to the gas station and pull out my phone to call Poe, I can hear her voice across the street but can't make out what she is saying but I assume she's yelling at Ben.

Chapter Text

Ben's Pov

The remainder of the time at Kopp's is awkward and uncomfortable, especially after Gwen came back over yelling at me and would barely let me get a word in to explain myself. Now we have been sitting in silence as she angrily sucks her shake down and Hux sits between us looking genuinely confused and uncomfortable. Admittedly it's not that much different from his regular facial expression but it is definitely intensified.

I feel bad for what I said. I grew up in Canto and it's unfortunately, a common thing to make fun of the kids from Jakku. Its especially prevalent in sports but it comes out at other times as well. Our schools have always been rivals and smack talk is just a normal part of it, but clearly Rey wasn't one to tolerate it.

I've been keeping an eye on her as she sits at the gas station across the street, swearing that I wouldn't leave until I knew she had a ride. About twenty minutes after she walked over there, I watch as a white charger with orange wheels pulls into the gas station and she gets in. I'm pretty sure that's Poe's car. How does she know Poe if she's from Jakku? He's one of the richest kids in Canto because he lives with his loaded grandparents, he was one of the most popular kids in our high school because he has his pilot's license which gave him an immediate boost in popularity, plus he was the student body president and the captain of the Lacrosse team. Their friendship just doesn't make sense to me at all.

Gwen aggressively sucks the remaining bits of her chocolate shake out of the cup, making an excessive amount of noise probably to get on my nerves. Admittedly it works, but I'm not going to let her know that. Our ride back to her dorm is tense, and Gwen stares out the window, refusing to acknowledge me and when I pull up to her dorm she gets out quickly, almost before the car is in park. "Time for me to go fix whatever you did," she snaps at me and slams the door.

Rey's POV

I hear Ben's jeep pull up outside and I crawl into my bed so I don't have to have a conversation about what happened. Gwen slips in silently and grabs her clothes and toiletry bag and heads to the bathroom when she notices I'm in bed. Once she leaves, I check that the alarm on my phone is set and doze off to the sounds of the traffic outside before she returns from the bathroom.

The next morning, I wake up before my alarm and glance over to see Gwen sleeping peacefully across the room. I slip out of the room and get ready for class in the bathroom so I don't wake her, but when I return to the room I find her awake and tapping away furiously on her phone. I turn to my dresser and slip my ripped light skinny jeans over my damp skin and grab a tan tank top.

"Hey," Gwen says in a sleepy voice and rolls to look at me. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I am actually," I look up at her as I put my shoes on to leave. "It was a stupid comment he made and I'm sorry I made a scene. I just needed to get out of there."

"You're fine," she assures as she sits up. "I get why you're touchy about it. I know it probably isn't easy to feel like you belong here when you feel so different. Remember though that you're way more qualified to be here than most people because you actually earned your way in, unlike Ren who's family pretty much bought his way in."

"I guess, yeah," I say as I zip my backpack up and sling it over my shoulder. "I have photography at 8 am so I'll see you at lunch with Rose and Finn okay?"

"Okay." She smiles at me and slinks back down into her bed, unlocking her phone.

"Gwen," I stop before I walk out the door. "Thanks."

"Of course." She says with a smile. "I'll stand up for you any day when it comes to stupid boys. And let me tell you, Ren is getting an earful right now." She holds up her phone with large blue bubbles on it, a wicked grin on her face.

I arrive at my 8 am class with 5 minutes to spare and find Rose standing outside the room waiting for the door to be unlocked.

"You're in photography with Professor Maz?" Her smile overtakes her entire face.

"Yep. Guess we should have compared our schedules." I laugh. We stand next to each other observing the other students in the class. There's a wide mix of students which you usually find in the more artsy types.

The professor shows up right at 8 and unlocks the door. She is a small woman with an orange wrap around her hair and thick coke bottle glasses. Her patterned orange and blue sweater flows behind her like a cape and her heavy jewelry clinks together as she walks. "Stand at the front of the room, you have assigned seats," she jabbers as we shuffle into the room. She grabs her clipboard and pushes her glasses up on her nose while flipping to the correct page.

"The seats are alphabetical," She explains as she walks along the rows of two-person tables, pointing at each chair and saying a last name. "Palpatine" She says as she reaches the third row and I move to my seat. "Resen," a small brunette girl sits next to me. "Solo, Tico...."

"It's Ren, Professor Maz." A deep voice comes from the side of the room and my eyes dart to the source.

The professor stops and looks over her glasses at Ben leaning against the wall. "Okay, Mr. Ren..." she scribbles on her clipboard. "You and Ms.Resen switch places then."

He makes eye contact with me and realizes what he just did. "Maz, that's really not necessary."

She leans one hand against the table next to her, puts her other on her hip, and lets out an exasperated sigh. "Mr. Ren, I might be friends with your parents but that does not give you permission to come in here and make a scene. You told me your name correction, I fixed it, now take your seat."

"Yes Maz," Ben mumbles as he makes his way to the seat next to me. It's almost humorous to watch a woman a third of his size put him in his place.

"That's professor Maz to you young man," She glares at him and continues down the last row.

I can hear my heart pounding in my ears as Ben pulls the chair out next to me and sits down. I can smell a combination of his hair gel and cologne; It's a sweet smell and almost intoxicating. Shifting in my seat, I pull my leg up to myself, leaning to the far side away from him.

"I'm sorry." He whispers to me and I can feel his eyes burning into the side of my head.

"Forget it," I whisper while staring straight ahead. "It doesn't matter."

Maz makes her way to the front of the room and I pull out my notebook and pen. I keep my eyes trained on her and try to ignore the constant feeling of Ben glancing my direction throughout the lecture. Maz flips through photographs of different unnamed artists talking about their individual styles. Suddenly a painting appears on the screen that nearly stops my heart. It's of a little girl standing on top of a crumpled pile of cars, there are swirls above her head and she points out to the distance like she's on a grand adventure... it's my painting. Maz talks about the style and has students guess what the intent behind work is as she continues through various photographs and artwork. Ben draws in a sharp breath next to me and shifts how he's sitting as she flips to another photograph. It's a black and white photograph with a faceless girl and very dramatic.

"I'm sure some of you picked up on it, or at least I hope you did and I'm not surrounded by idiots," she looks over her glasses at us again. "But those were all works by people sitting in this room with you that I pulled from the portfolios I had you email me over the summer. Your first assignment will be a partner assignment. You will be introducing and explaining your style to your partner, they will then be the main subject of your newest piece. You have to turn in a photograph even if your usual work is a painting or drawing and it does not have to be a permanent addition to your body of work, just as long as it fits your style for the purpose of the assignment. Next week, you will present your work to the class. Your partner will explain your style and you will explain the newest piece and how it relates." I lean back in my chair and look down the row at Rose. She smiles and raises her eyebrows in a silent agreement to be partners.

"The person sitting with you at your table will be your partner." I feel a chill come over me and Ben tenses his jaw. "Please take a few moments to get to know each other, exchange numbers, and then you can be on your way. I will be checking in on your plan on Thursday so please do some planning in the next 48 hours. Thanks for a great first day of class all."

Ben turns to me and rests his arm on the table. "Want to meet at the Cantina Cafe outside of the library tomorrow at 2 after Dr.William's class?"

"Yeah, that works," I say and shove my notebook in my bag, not looking up at him.

"You know you're going to have to forgive me ice queen." He teases.

"More royalty references?" I look up at him, his brown eyes dance with a humorous look. "Attack where I'm from yesterday, attack my personality today, anything else you want to go after?"

"I barely attacked your personality. I know this isn't your normal personality. I've seen you with Rose and heard about you from Gwen. This isn't you." He counters.

"Well then maybe it's you who brings this out in me." I snap at him as I stand up. "I'll see you tomorrow at the Cafe."

"What was that?" Rose whispers as I walk up to her where she waits at the door and we leave down the hallway together. I look behind us and see Ben walking with his hands in his pockets.

"Long story," I whisper back. "I'll tell you at lunch."

Ben's POV

"Dude, you pissed her off." Hux walks through the front door and drops his bag on the floor of our living room. "Gwen is not happy with you at all."

I pause my video game and sigh. "I tried apologizing to Rey."

"Yeah and then apparently made it worse a minute later," Hux yells from the kitchen as he grabs a soda and cracks it open. "And I hear you two have to work together for a project. That sounds fun," He laughs at me as he walks back into the room.

"I don't know what to do. She's a very headstrong person, so I don't even know how to fix this because I think I've completely ruined all trust in literally a day."

"I don't know man, but I definitely think she has some trauma from what Gwen has said. You need to proceed carefully with her."

"Not my strong suit, but I'll try," I sigh again and start my video game up, handing Hux the other controller.

Chapter Text

Ben's Pov

I slept like garbage last night. I've never been one to get wrapped up in feelings but I couldn't shake the feeling I had knowing that I hurt her. A little before I'm about to get up and get ready for the lecture, Hux barges into my room. "Let's go." He demands, throwing my keys at me.

"What?" I yawn and stretch, letting out a low groan.

"Gwen doesn't want us dropping the futon and fridge off while Rey is there so she wants us to come while Rey is at class." He says still standing in the doorway. I don't argue, knowing that I screwed up and I should give Rey her space, so I grab my jeans and jacket and throw them on.

We get to the dorm at 8:30 after hooking up the trailer and loading up the furniture into it because it wouldn't fit in the back of the Jeep. Gwen meets us at the front door and gives Hux a peck on the cheek as we pass with the futon. She doesn't meet my eye but acknowledges me with a polite hello.

"Of course you live on the fourth floor," Hux complains as we round the tight corner of the stairwell on the second floor. We already got it stuck once and he isn't one for staying clam while problem-solving so his patience is running thin.

"I so appreciate it though, thank you," Gwen says from behind him. "And Ren, thanks for helping."

"It's no problem. Hopefully, this will help me make up for my stupidity."

"It's a start."

Once we make it to the fourth floor, she holds the door to their room open, and we set the futon on the ground. I look at Gwen's side which looks like the dorm page in the Target catalog but looking over at Rey's side puts a pit in my stomach. She has one dress hanging in the closet with an empty hanger next to it, a couple of pairs of shoes sit on the floor, and the dresser has one bag of toiletries sitting on it with a small mirror and makeup bag. I look at her desk which homes one cup of pens and a photo frame of her and Poe at her graduation. He holds her close and she smiles so big, holding a diploma and an orange rose in her free hand. Her smile is absolutely beautiful. The bed has sheets that look extremely scratchy and one old quilt with a couple of ripped seams. She really has so little.

We help Gwen loft both of the beds as she directs, move the futon underneath, and I run back downstairs to grab the fridge once everything is set to her standards. As I walk back down the hallway to their room after returning, I hear another voice that sounds like Rey. She must have come in the back door because I didn't pass her in the front stairwell. As I walk in, the three of them stop talking and Rey backs up to her desk making room for me to walk through with the fridge. I set it under her bed and look for an outlet to plug the cord into while Gwen starts rummaging around and packing her bag for class.

"Here," Rey says extending her hand between the boards of the bed and I pass her the cord. Our fingers brush and the contact almost feels like an electric shock causing me to take a sharp breath in. She takes the cord without making eye contact with me and wiggles between her bed and the desk to plug the fridge in while I plug the tv into the powerstrip.

"Well, we have class in a few minutes so we gotta go," Gwen says as she and Hux walk out the door.

"I'm right behind you," I say as I get up from plugging the tv in, but they're already gone. I look at Rey as she crosses her arms uncomfortably and glances at her closet. Her cheeks flushing a little.

"I didn't want you to see this," She admits sheepishly as she takes her jacket off and hangs it on the empty hanger. I shove my hands in my pockets and lean against the window thinking of the best way to handle this and make her feel a little more comfotable.

"See what?" I play dumb.

"This," she motions at the lack of stuff on her side and the overflowing closet on Gwen's side.

"What about it?" I look at her, but she still refuses to look at me. "You're obviously just a minimalist. I appreciate that about you. I mean look at me, I wear black all the time. Sometimes I shake things up and wear grey." At that, she smiles a little and her shoulders relax.

"I'm going to get coffee before class, do you want anything?" I ask after a moment and she looks at me, her eyes shocked and her mouth open a touch.

"You don't need to be nice to me. We don't need to be friends."

I push myself off from the wall and walk towards the door. "I know. But I can try." I exit through the door and leave her alone before she can respond.

Rey's POV

I get to my music class with some time to spare before noon and pull out my laptop. I wait for it to load and start going through my portfolio of photographs and organizing them into two folders. One Ben can see, one he can't.

Rose and Finn come in and ask me what I'm doing, noticing that I'm engrossed in something on my computer, and I show them my folder of work. Finn is apparently fascinated by my work and takes my computer from me to look closer at the images. Ben walks in the door to the left and I watch him out of the corner of my eye while still talking to Rose. He walks along the back row where I'm seated, pauses when he gets to me, and reaches over me to set a coffee down directly in front of me. The smell of espresso and caramel fill my nostrils as well as the sweet smell of his cologne. Without saying anything, he continues walking along the row and sits down in his seat next to Dr. Williams's desk. I look to my right and see Rose and Finn staring at me, their mouths gaping open in shock. Ignoring them, I take my computer back from Finn and shove it into my backpack.

Dr.Williams shows up and starts class by showing us a clip from one of the Star Wars movies. He pauses the clips and moves to another one talking about character themes. I haven't seen any of the movies so what's happening in the scenes makes no sense, but the music is familiar from our Pops concert we performed every year in High School Band. As class progresses, I can't shake the feeling that I'm being watched so I take a sip of the coffee and glance over at Ben. He is doodling on a notebook and completely tuned out so I convince myself that I must be paranoid. I take another sip and go back to my notes, but then I sense it again so I look to the other side of the room and catch the eye of a girl with light brown hair and blue eyes. She quickly diverts her eyes and tries to make herself look like she's actually listening to the lecture and not looking at me. I am able to catch her watching me a few more times during the class, but continue to just try to ignore her and focus on the lecture.

Dr.Williams gives us our homework to watch any of the three movies on the list and determine all of the character themes we can find and dismisses the class. I close my notebook and watch as the brunette girl shoves her stuff into her bag and nearly trips trying to get to Ben as fast as she can. He pays her little attention as she talks his ear off and follows him across the room. He stops at the door and looks at me, interrupting her mid-sentence. "You ready?" The girl shoots me a disapproving look, realizing that Ben is waiting for her, and walks out of the room in a huff.

The fact that he is waiting for me catches me off guard and I fumble with my stuff as I rush. "Uh yeah, hang on a second." I shove my notebook in my bag and fight with the zipper, tugging on it, but it doesn't move. Finally, it moves and the zipper splits and I immediately feel my cheeks turn bright red from embarrassment. I sigh deeply and pick up my bag, shoving it under my arm and grab my empty coffee cup with my free hand, following him down the lower level hallway.

We walk in silence out of the music building and towards the library where the Cantina Cafe is located. A small group of girls from class stand in a circle on the edge of the sidewalk whispering among themselves as they stare at Ben, except for the girl with light brown hair who is glaring directly at me.

"I think you bringing me coffee really upset that girl," I say quietly. "You didn't need to do that by the way."

"What girl?" He's oblivious and ignores my second comment.

"The girl with brown hair and blue eyes that sits on the far side of the room. She watched me for the entire two-hour lecture and was glaring at me back there."

"Voi," he says matter-of-factly. "She grew up next door to me and has always had a weird fascination with me." He glances back over his shoulder at her, letting his gaze linger for a second, his eyes scanning up and down her quickly. "Don't give her any worry, she's harmless."

"I mean I'm not worried, it's just unsettling when your every move is being watched." I look up at him trying to read his face, thinking that maybe this is the girl that he thinks is cute. It would make sense, they know each other from home, she is very beautiful, and she fits the description Hux and Gwen gave.

"Just ignore her," he says calmly and takes the empty coffee cup from my hand and throws it into the nearest garbage can.

We find a seat near the window at the Cantina Cafe and Ben goes up to the counter while I check my email to kill time. He comes back shortly with two coffees, a cup of water, and a large muffin and sets all of them down on the table.

"I didn't know if you wanted coffee or water so I got one of each and you can pick. What you don't drink, I will," he says grabbing the muffin.

"Thanks." I take the water. "If I drink more coffee I'm going to get too jittery." He smiles at my comment and drops his eyes again as he breaks the muffin in half. I'm caught off guard by how the muffin is huge but his hands make it look so tiny and I can't pull my eyes away as he sets one half on a napkin in front of him and hands me the other half on the plate. "Shut up and eat the muffin," he says when he notices my hesitation and I take it from him as he takes a bite of his half. "You're weird with food," he mumbles through a full mouth.

"And you're pushy with food," I counter back.

"No, I'm generous." He smiles at me with his mouth closed as he chews and I feel my cheeks flush. He's hard to be mad at.

"Alright let's get started," I say as I pull open the file on my computer and he does the same. Ben hands me his laptop and I pass him mine hesitantly and start flipping through the folder of his work, taking a moment to pause on each photograph. The nerves behind knowing that he's looking at my work and wondering what he's thinking gets to me as I keep looking at him over the computer screen and trying to read his face. His eyebrows are furrowed but the expression behind his eyes is almost sad.

I look at his work again and notice how beautifully done they are. Not a single photograph is taken in color and the exposure is set very low to give them a dark and eerie feeling. All of the faces of the models are obscured and lit with very dramatic chiaroscuro lighting. I get to one of a little boy holding a pair of keys in his hands, sitting on the floor, and facing the front door of a house. The boy is skinny with a shaggy dark head of hair almost like Ben. I grab the laptop and turn it towards him and he just looks at it with a blank look.

"What's this one about?" I ask quietly.

"My dad left when I was five. He just decided one day that he wanted out and left my mom and me behind. Thankfully I have my uncle and he raised me with my mom." He pulls the laptop a little closer to himself and clicks the arrow key a couple of times and stops on another photo, this one of himself sitting in the same spot with the keys in hand. "When I was twelve, he came back. It took my mom and I awhile, but eventually, we welcomed him back and we live a semi-normal life now. These were photos I turned in for an assignment in High School." The door was open this time and I can see the legs and feet of another man standing in the doorway. He continues through the photographs and explains them to me. They ware all personal experiences of him sometimes depicted by himself and sometimes shown through other people. Everything from his first heartbreak to the depression he experienced in High School and his self admittance to the mental hospital when he realized he needed help. As he talks, I can feel tears forming in my eyes but when I look up at him he smiles at me. "Rey, it's okay. I'm better now," he reaches forward and wipes a tear off my cheek. "I went through a lot but it fuels my art and it is very therapeutic to work through it this way."

"So why do you watermark all of your work "Kylo Ren" instead of Ben?" I ask sitting back in my seat uncomfortable from him touching my cheek.

"I created Kylo when I went dark." He closes his computer screen and leans back in his chair as well. "I was troubled and wanted to be separated from my normal self."

"Why do you still use it as your name here then if you're better?"

"It separates me from my family. I don't want to be associated with them here." He rakes his fingers through his hair and looks at me, the light from the window giving his eyes a gold tint. "People treat me differently when they know who my family is."

"Who's that?"

"You'll find out soon enough I'm sure." He says leaning forward and resting his elbows on the tabletop. "Alright, your turn."

Ben's POV

I turn the computer screen towards Rey and reveal a painting of a girl who looks a lot like her, sleeping and curled up in the inside curve of an old machine's tread. She looks at it briefly and then looks up at me again, her expression soft and almost scared.

"Is this you?" I ask quietly. She nods and sits forward, resting her elbows on the table.

"Yeah, it is. I thought I had removed all of those from the folder," she sighs. "I lived in the local junkyard for a few months when I was 13."

"So this is from then?" I ask cautiously and she nods. "What happened?"

"I ran away from my foster family and found a small community of homeless people who lived there. They took me under their wing and took care of me. I found inspiration in their lives and particularly the children that live there, so that's why most of the paintings are of children playing. I found it amazing how they could be standing on a pile of crushed metal, but in their heads, they were seeing a spaceship or a pirate ship. They didn't know anything else. In those few months, I realized how living at the Unkars wasn't all that bad and I returned. I at least had a roof over my head and a warm shower if nothing else."

I reached out for her hand and she recoils a little, taking her hand and placing it in her lap. I wait as she takes a deep shaky breath and continues talking about her work. "I thought I would be grounded when I returned to the Unkars but they almost didn't seem to care. They had apparently become accustomed to me not being there and proceeded to live as if I wasn't. At the age of 13, almost 14, I went out and found a job just so I could buy food and shoes. All of my clothes are from the counselors at the high school. My computer is a graduation gift from my art teacher who helped me create this portfolio. This is my heart and soul in my art Ben." I flinch at the sound of her calling me by my actual name, it has become so unusual to hear anyone besides an authority figure or my parents call me that.

"Thank you for sharing with me," I say softly.

"I only was able to because you did," she responds. "I'm not usually that vulnerable with my art. The only people who have heard that in-depth of an explanation are my art teacher and my High School counselor. Even the AP committee and the person here at the school who picked me for the Art Scholarship got an altered version of the story."

"You mean the full ride art scholarship?"

"Yeah, my AP portfolio was picked for it. That's the only way I'm here," She shrugs. "I have no idea who chose it though."

"The President of the school," I say not meeting her eyes.

"Dr. Organa?"

"Yep." I don't dare tell her who Dr. Organa actually is and I continue to dodge Rey's gaze.

"Ok so now that that's over." She says letting out a heavy breath and shaking her arms out with a chuckle. "Let's plan these photo shoots."

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

Thursday morning during Photography, Professor Maz talked to us about a few famous photographers and had us critique them and come up with what we thought the photos meant. I enjoy watching her teach in her flowing linen outfits and chunky jewelry that almost overwhelms her little body. I guess it kind of fits though because she is such a small person but she has such a huge personality and is quickly becoming my favorite professor. She doesn't take crap from anyone and spends the hour climbing up and down from tables while she talks because she is so excited about the material which is truly inspirational.

After completing the notes for the day, she started at the end of the alphabet and talked to each group about their proposed ideas for the assignment due next Tuesday. Once she talked to your group we were told we could leave so I was thankful Ben and I were towards the end of the alphabet, which meant I could hopefully get some reading done before meeting friends for lunch.

"Okay so for my photos people always wear black or dark colors, but I prefer black. Less editing that way. What do you have that you could wear?" Ben asks as we wait for Maz to get to us'.

"Uh, I have a black t-shirt with my High Schools logo on it, but that's it," I answer.

"Do you think Gwen has anything you could borrow?"

"Probably, I can ask."

"What should I wear?" He asks, a smirk pulling at his lips.

"Well to start, no black. Do you have lighter blue jeans and either a white or light cream shirt?"

"No." 'Of course, he doesn't,' I think to myself. "Have you seen how I dress on a regular basis?" He motions at his all-black outfit and smirks at me as he flips his hair back. 'He really needs to stop doing that.'

"Does someone you know have a shirt you can borrow?" I ask, rolling my eyes.

"Well Hux does, but he's too little and that won't fit my buff arms." He holds his arm out and flexes in a muscle man pose and I roll my eyes again. "My dad lives in shirts like that. I'll stop by and grab one before I pick you up Saturday."

"Alright Ren and Palpatine, your turn." Maz's voice interrupts as Rose and her partner pack up their belongings behind Ben's head.

Ben's POV

Maz approved our idea in an impressively short time. I was definitely expecting that to be more difficult considering how stubborn and opinionated she usually is and how I've seen her give my dad a hard time more times than I can count. She did express how impressed she was by how open we were being with our work and she was excited to see the outcome next week.

Rey had taken off nearly as soon as Maz had released us, so I race after her trying to keep up and spot her walking up the stairs towards the main lawn. I quicken my steps and finally catch up to her at the top of the stairs slightly out of breath.

"Hey."

She whips her head up to look at me. "Hey," She says cautiously as if she's confused as to why I'm chasing her down which to be fair, I'm not even sure why I am.

She squints up at me and I instinctively brush my hair back from my face again and I watch her eyes follow my hand through my hair. "I'm going to grab an early lunch and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me?"

"Oh." She pauses and looks at her phone. "I'm actually meeting Poe once he's out of his lecture and we're going then."

"Uh yeah." I shift my backpack uneasily on my shoulder and look over her head. "Forget I asked. Another time then?"

"Sure." She says softly, smiles, and walks away. I stand there for a second watching her go and shake my head. 'What am I doing?'

Rey's POV

That was weird. I thought I remembered telling him we didn't need to be friends. Like we're classmates and yeah, we opened up quite a bit going through our art but that tends to happen with creative minds talking about their art. He's attractive, I can admit that much but he's my student mentor, that's so beyond inappropriate, clearly lined out in the student handbook. Besides, I'm sure he's just being nice. Voi would be much better suited for him and I'm sure that's who he likes anyways and was just trying to play it cool when I asked about her.

I sit outside the Cantina on the patio waiting for Poe and start my reading for my Biology course that is required before lab tomorrow. I hated that class yesterday morning. There were over 100 of us and Professor Snoke didn't even take attendance because he said it doesn't matter, half of the students will drop out anyway. That just doesn't seem like a promising attitude from a professor and it put me on edge. Poe sneaks up on me and grabs my sides making me jump out of the chair.

"Hey jumpy, ready for food?" He laughs.

"Don't do that!" I push him back a bit and shove my book into my still broken backpack. The zipper won't close but I don't have money to replace it so I just carry it under my arm like a football. He takes the bag from me and puts it under one arm and slings the other arm around my shoulders as we begin our walk to the dining hall.

Ben's POV

Since I decided to skip the lecture yesterday to help Hux move the futon to Gwen and Rey's, I decided a solo lunch is a great time to catch up on the reading so I pull out my book as I eat. It's probably not the best idea to skip the first lecture, but thankfully the professor emails out assignments so I can catch up a little bit. As I set my fork down to turn the page of my textbook, a tray is set down next to me along with two across the table. I look up and find Voi already sitting down, and her two friends across from me.

"Mind if we sit here," Voi asks, taking her jacket off.

"Well, you're already sitting so go ahead."

She laughs an unnecessary heavy laugh. "These are my roommates Manal and El." She gestures to the girls across the table. "This is Ben. We grew up together and are neighbors." She puts her hand on my arm and smiles at me, batting her eyelashes and irritating me more.

I brush her hand off my arm and correct her. "We were neighbors, I don't live there anymore. And it's Kylo."

"Look." The one who I think is El directs the other two's attention to the door and I follow their gaze to see Rey walk in with Poe. He hands her back her ID after swiping it for her and they make their way to a table near us. I cringe as I notice that he's carrying her backpack for her and clearly she hasn't fixed the zipper yet either because a book falls out as he sets it on the table. She bends over and grabs it placing it back in the bag and catches my gaze as she stands back up. I watch as her cheeks flush and she follows Poe up to grab food without acknowledging me again, causing my heart to sink a little.

"I heard they're an item," Manal whispers to us and I go back to pretending I'm reading so I don't have to be a part of the conversation.

"I doubt that." Voi Scoffs. "She's from Jakku. There's no way someone from Canto would be interested in her. Frankly, it boggles my mind that they're even friends." She takes a bite of her food. "What do you think Ben? You two are friendly, has she said anything about him?"

"It's Kylo," I correct her. "And no, we haven't talked about him. Plus she and I aren't really friends."

"That's weird that she hasn't mentioned him. She's definitely hiding something." Voi says.

"You think?" I look up at the three them.

"Definitely." Her minions El and Manal say in unison.

Rey's POV

Poe and I walk into the dining room and he swipes both of our cards. He's always been like this and once I met his grandpa I knew exactly why. He grew up watching a man who is all about being chivalrous. Once I tried calling him out for it and I told him I didn't need him to do that, but he responded with "I know you don't NEED me to Rey, but you're my friend so I WANT to help you." After that, I realized he was just being nice and that's how he shows he cares for someone so I stopped fighting him.

We walk over to a table and Poe sets my bag on the table by his but a book falls out on my side. I tell him I got it before he jumps over the table and tries to fix it. As I stand back up, I can sense that I'm being watched and look to the source to find Voi, two other girls from the music class, and Ben watching me. Of course he's sitting with Voi, I was silly for ever thinking or hoping that he liked me. Without turning around to acknowledge them I walk with Poe to go grab our food. We pass Rose and Finn as they are swiping into the dining hall and I point them to the table we set our stuff down at.

I return to the table with my food and hand an extra fork to Poe. "Thanks," he mumbles through a mouthful of food.

"You know for being so polite usually, your table manners are extremely lacking," I tease him. He sticks his food covered tongue out and I throw a grape at him in disgust.

"Hey, guys." Rose sits down next to me and Finn sits across from her and next to Poe. Poe swallows quick and wipes his face, composing himself quickly in the presence of new people.

"Poe, this is Rose and Finn. They're in my freshman cultural seminar class."

"Nice to meet you two, "he says, still wiping his face and then turns to Finn. "You're a physical therapy student, right? I've seen you down there a couple of times the last two days."

Rose turns to me, sensing that we're no longer welcome in the boys' conversations. "What's with him?" She nods in the direction of Ben's table and I turn my head and look over to find him also looking at me. He looks away quickly and goes back to picking at his plate. In response to his sudden movement, Voi looks at him and then turns towards me, making direct eye contact and prompting me to turn back to Rose.

"I have no idea. He's been weird today." I say chewing on a piece of bacon and Rose raises her eyebrow. "Like for photography we both opened up a lot yesterday about our art. Rose, there were tears that's how much we opened up."

"Wait he cried?"

"No, he didn't cry, I did. But he had such a soft expression and he even tried to hold my hand. It was weird." I pause for a second and chew on the inside of my cheek. "I don't know Rose, there's just something about him that I can't put my finger on."

"Seems weird. In the encounters I've had with him so far, he just seems quiet, dark, and kind of odd."

"I mean he is that. But there's definitely a soft side to him."

"Please tell me you're not talking about Ren." Poe rolls his eyes and looks over at Ben.

"What's it matter?" I ask, shoving a large bite of omelet into my mouth.

"You know the creep is staring at you right?" Poe says matter-of-factly.

"Poe stop," I say not looking up at him. "What's your issue with him anyways?"

"Nothing really. He's just always been an odd duck. Honestly kind of rude to me and my friends." He gages for my response and continues when he realizes I'm not going to give him a reaction. "I heard he has charges against him. But somehow he got out of them so he's just a criminal roaming the streets." He wiggles his fingers in front of his face in a mocking spooky gesture.

"Oh shut up," I scoff.

Poe leans back in his chair and throws his hands in the air. "Don't say I didn't warn ya."

We continue eating in a strained hush for the remainder of the time with occasional comments between Poe and Finn about the science department and their classes.

I see movement from Ben's table and watch him get up despite Voi trying to get him to stay seated. He ignores her, puts his backpack on, and walks over to dump his tray.

"I'm going to run back to my dorm quickly and try to get a reading done before my painting studio class. I'll catch you later." I stand up quickly, throwing my bag under one arm and grabbing the tray with my free hand.

Poe raises an eyebrow at me with a skeptical look. "Yeah see ya, Rey." And the other two say goodbye.

I rush over to the trash cans and Ben places his tray in the conveyor belt leading to the dishwasher.

"Ben."

Ben's POV

I watch as Poe sits down across from her, they smile at each other, say a few things, he sticks his tongue out at her, and she throws a grape at him. There's no way they don't at least have feelings for each other even if they aren't dating. I'm sure Voi can sense me looking at Rey because she keeps looking at her and then at me, so I try to make myself busy with my tray even though I'm not super hungry anymore. I look up and catch Rey's and the girl who I think is Rose's eyes and I immediately look back at my tray. When they lose interest and go back to talking, I with their wondering what they're possibly saying. Are they talking about me? Why else would they both look over at me?

Poe looks over at me a few minutes later and I decide I need to stop watching their table because and I have never really gotten along. It's not that I was a loser or anything but the jocks definitely got enjoyment out of making my life more difficult than it needed to be. I often would find my car vandalized or hear rumors about myself being made. Eventually, I just stopped listening or caring. The rumors got worse when I ended up in the hospital after the accident but at that point, I really didn't have the energy to deal with the rumors, and frankly, most of them were true anyways.

I look at my watch. An hour and 15 minutes until studio starts, might as well run home quickly and see if Hux has emerged from his room yet instead of suffering through Brunch with Voi. I stand up and walk towards the dishwasher and trash cans ignoring Voi's pleas for me to stay. I scrape my half touched food into the trash can and set my tray on the conveyor belt.

"Ben."

I turn around and find Rey balancing her book bag and trying to scrape the food off of her tray. I reach out and grab the tray and fork and finish scraping it off for her before she drops something without saying anything.

"Thanks." She says and smiles at me. I don't reciprocate and her face falls as she falls into step with me and we walk back out to the front door of the campus center.

"How was lunch with Poe?" I ask with an annoyed tone.

"Why do you two hate each other so much?"

"It's a long story," I mumble back rummaging in my pocket for my motorcycle key.

"I have time. My class doesn't start until noon." She says, smiling up at me.

"Same. But I was going to run home quickly." I say walking towards my bike and getting on.

"Oh okay. Well, see ya," she says and gives a small smile and walks the other direction. I turn the engine on and see her jump out of the corner of my eye.

Chapter Text

Ben's POV

I park my motorcycle near the ceramics patio where the kilns are located and walk into the downstairs door of the art building. I glance into the painting studio to my left and see Rey sitting in front of an easel and organizing her rolling desk that they're assigned. She looks up and sees me and gives a small wave and I wave back before heading down the hall to the photography darkroom studio.

The studio is large but doesn't have any windows to help make lighting for photo shoots easier and so the film isn't exposed accidentally. I take a seat in the same one as last year and get my film camera out. I watch as people filter into the room and roll my eyes when I see Voi enter. She sees me and lights up and I know she's about to come to sit by me.

"Oh my gosh, we have another class together. What are the chances?" She says as she pulls the chair out and I stare wordlessly at my camera. "You mind if I sit here?"

"Once again, you're already sitting so go ahead."

"You're so funny," she giggles and touches my arm again.

"Alright class, if you're in here you should be here for intro to film photography. If you're here for math, you're in the wrong place." The professor chuckles to himself and I roll my eyes. "I'm professor Abrams. Here is the syllabus, please make sure you read all of this." He passes a giant stack of papers around the room as he works to get his computer hooked up.

"So today, we are going to start out with an exhilarating lecture about the basics of how black and white photography works. I trust that you all brought your cameras and notebooks to take notes. I do not allow the use of laptops in this class as we are immersing ourselves in the old practice of photography."

I zone out because this is the second time hearing this speech since I failed out of this class last year. That was my reality check to lay off of the drinking to excess and stop sleeping through my 8 am classes.

I rest my elbow on the armrest on the opposite side of Voi as she's already leaning annoyingly close to me and let my mind drift off. I start thinking about the photography assignment Rey and I would be working on Saturday and how I'm excited to spend the day with her and let her show me around Jakku. I know the town isn't much but it would be nice to understand her more and see it from her eyes.

Instinctively I pull my phone out and text Rey.

Ben: Hey

I lock my phone and set it on my lap, impatiently waiting for her replay. A minute later it buzzes.

Rey: Hi

Ben: So I was thinking about the shoot this weekend. We need to figure out what you're wearing.

Rey: I'll text Gwen and see when she'll be around.

I lock my phone again and wait for a buzz.

Rey: She'll be there after my studio class at 3. What time does your class get done?

Ben: 3 as well. I'm two rooms down from you. Meet on the bench by the painting room after class?

Rey: sounds good.

I look up and catch Voi reading over my shoulder. I look at her and she tries to play it off as if she wasn't doing anything.

Voi leans over a little while later and whispers to me as Professor Abrams continues to drone on. "Hey what are you doing after class?"

"Working on a project," I whisper back.

"With Rey?"

"Yes. Stop pretending you don't already know this."

"What? I don't.'

"Okay Voi," I snap. She stares at me for a minute with her mouth open and then sits back in her chair with her arms crossed.

At the end of the lecture, Dr.Adams gives us our assignment that we will be developing in class next week. We are to take 20 different photographs of the same person in different poses. Voi makes a point to loudly pack up her bag and flip her hair at me as she walks away because apparently she thinks I care that she's mad at me. I'm sure she's hoping I chase her down.

I walk out of the room and turn to the right towards the painting room and see Rey is sitting patiently, watching something out the window. I pull out my camera and snap a picture of her. One down, 19 more to go. She looks up as I approach her but doesn't smile, I think my moodiness after Brunch got to her.

"Ready?' She asks and stands up.

"Yeah," I say as she starts walking back down the hallway and I don't move. "Where are you going?"

"I'm walking to my dorm."

"Let me give you a ride." I jingle my keys and she follows grudgingly outside to my motorcycle where I hand her a helmet from the storage compartment.

"You better not kill me," she threatens as she buckles the strap under her chin. She's so cute in the helmet, her little face smooshed at the cheeks.

"Or what? You're like half my size." I smirk at her.

"I don't know, I'll figure it out." She glares at me and closes the visor dramatically, obscuring her eyes and I chuckle at her before I climb on the motorcycle. She climbs on behind me and rests her hands on her legs, avoiding touching me.

"You're going to have to hang on if you don't want me to kill you." She hesitates at my words and then wraps her arms around my waist loosely. I'm thankful I'm wearing my helmet as I can't quite control the smile that spreads across my face. I put the bike in gear and feel her arms tighten as we pull away from the curb.

Rey's POV

I think Gwen was a little too excited to let me borrow her clothes. She spent a good two hours dressing me in various outfits and parading me in front of Ben and Hux as if they cared. How the girl pulled so much black out of that colorful mess of a closet is beyond me but she put me in more outfits in those two hours than I think I have ever worn in my life. Finally, we settled on one with Ben's approval. A pair of dark jeans from my dresser, a black high neck shirt that just skimmed the top of my jeans, a pair of black heeled boots, and a sheer black flowing kimono that reached my ankles. I've never been one for all-black outfits, but I'll admit that I really like how I look in it.

"Good?" I ask in an exasperated voice.

"Good." Ben smiles at me from the futon. This impromptu fashion show has helped both of us relax and we're not nearly as tense as we were after Brunch. "Wait, you should try on that maroon one again."

Gwen digs through a pile on her desk and holds one up. "This one?" Ben nods.

I grab it aggressively and step back into Gwen's makeshift dressing room she made out of her bedsheets. The maroon shirt is much harder to get into because It has a full front but is held together by three thick straps in the back. Two that crisscross from my shoulders to under my arms and one more across my lower back creating an open triangle on my middle back. My arm keeps getting stuck between the straps but eventually, I wiggle into it. I step back out still wearing the black boots and jeans and motion at them to speak.

"Nah. I like the black one better," Ben says with a cheeky grin and I throw the shirt I just changed out of at him. "But... I think that would work for tonight."

"What's tonight? I say taking off the boots and sitting on the chair by my desk.

"Thirsty Thursday at Spur," Hux says "Or as Gwen calls is Spursday."

"The country Karaoke bar?" I wrinkle my nose up.

"You don't have to sing but everyone goes," Ben says. "Even Voi will probably be there." He gives me a mischievous smile knowing how I'll react to her presence.

"Oh, that definitely makes me want to go because she and I are obviously making fast friends."

"Come on Rey. Just for a while?" Gwen pouts. "We haven't had any good roommate time yet."

"And you think a loud bar with bad singing is the place to do it?"

"Just try it." She says pushing me into a chair and attacking my face with makeup.

Ben's POV

I watch Gwen as she keeps grabbing random jars and containers of powders and liquids and applying them to Rey's face with an overwhelming amount of brushes. Occasionally she stands back, tips her head, and purses her lips while studying Rey's face. I can only imagine how much Rey hates this because up this point I have only noticed a light dusting of makeup and mascara on her face each day. I can't say I mind it though, because I love the freckles that dust her cheeks. Eventually, Gwen stands back and smiles. "Done!" She proclaims loudly.

Rey stands up and looks over at us while looking for the mirror. She's naturally very pretty and cute with her soft face, but with the addition of the makeup, her features are sharper and more pronounced. "Wow Rey," Hux says.

"Yeah?" She blushes and looks in the mirror. "You think it looks good."

"Girl you're stunning," Gwen says as she touches up her own face in the mirror. "Ren, tell her she's stunning."

I swallow hard and look at her. "You look amazing Rey." She smiles and blushes.

"Food time?" Hux stands up and puts his shoes on, making it clear that it's time to leave.

Rey's Pov

We all pile into Ben's jeep and head to a chain pasta restaurant down the road from the College. I'm slowly learning how to gracefully pull myself up into his jeep despite the excessive lift on it. They keep telling me I want to load up on absorbent food if I want to make it to my class tomorrow so I oblige and order macaroni. Around 9:30, after stopping by the guy's house so they can change, we head to Spurs. Ben and Hux go in and use what I can only assume are their fake IDs and tell us to meet them around the corner. Gwen and I stand around listening to the booming music coming from the building in the ally when a door to the side opens and Ben motions for us to come over.

The room is larger than I expected with a bar on the far end, a few tall tables, and a small dance floor in front of the Karaoke machine. The dimmed chandeliers hanging from the ceiling are made out of antlers and have bras hanging from them. Classy.

"What do you want to drink?" Ben yells over the music.

"Lime Margarita on the rocks," Gwen yells back and Ben looks at me.

"Whatever she got," I yell back because I've never drank before and don't know what to order. Ben nods and walks towards the bar.

Gwen pulls me along behind her, dancing the entire way, and finds Hux on the other side of the room. They kiss and snuggle up to each other, talking too close for me to hear anything and be a part of the conversation so I step back and observe the people. There's a lot of people here for this little bar. Some of them I recognize but don't know, but most of them I have never seen before. Ben comes back and reaches over me to hand Gwen her drink and she makes a kissy face to him in appreciation. He puts his hand on my back as he sneaks around me holding another Margarita and a beer in the other hand above his head and out of my reach.

"Have you drank before?" He yells close to my face. I shake my head no at him. "This shit will knock you on your ass if you're not ready. They make them strong here." I stare at him. "If you feel at all funny, you come find me okay?"

"Okay Dad," I smirk and take the drink as he lowers it back into my reach.

"Wait." He grabs the straw and viciously mixes the drink causing it to slosh over the sides onto my hand. "It won't help much because it's mostly cheap tequila but it's worth a try."

The four of us mingle with each other, watch the performances, and Gwen and I dance a little for a while. When my drink is mostly gone and I'm feeling a little tipsy someone comes up behind me and grabs my sides. I jump and flip around quickly to find Poe's goofy smile looking back at me. "Poe!"

"What is little Rey doing here?!?!" He yells and gives me a hug. "Uh oh." He grabs my hand with the drink in it and holds it in front of his face. "And what do we have here?" He smiles again.

"Oops," I yell.

"Alright, shots!" Gwen yells as she comes back by us with a small tray. She hands me a lime and a little shot glass with clear liquid, the smell coming from it is horrendous. She tries to hand one to Ben and he mouths"driving" back at her so she rolls her eyes and looks at Poe. "Here I don't really know you but you're a friend of Rey's so you're a friend of mine." I watch as Hux and Ben give each other a look over her head. "Here's to a great year!" Gwen yells and knocks her glass into mine, slams the shot back, and sucks on the lime. I follow suit and look up at Ben who is watching me, an amused expression on his face.

"What was that?" I yell.

"Tequila!" Gwen takes the glass from me and sets it on a table. "Let's dance," she yells and grabs my hand to pull me out onto the dance floor. I can feel myself slipping a little and look for Ben or Poe. Due to his height, I quickly spot Ben sipping his beer and chatting with Hux but Poe is gone, probably back with his friends.

At some point, Gwen hands me another Margarita and I continue to drink it gleefully as I dance to the music with her. I don't know who it is but at some point, I feel male hands come up behind me and grab my hips. I look for Ben and can't find him but I keep dancing. Suddenly the man is gone and Ben is holding my arm and very close to my face.

Ben's POV

"Rey?" I lean in close to her face and she squints at me.

"Ben!" She slams both hands onto my cheeks and cups my face. "Was that you dancing with me?"

"No, it wasn't. It was a random guy." I look at her while she giggles at me and sways. "Gwen and Hux left, it's time to get you home." I put my hand on her back and walk her out the door nodding at the bouncer before turning to wear my jeep was previously parked, the spot now empty. I sigh and figure that Hux used the spare and took it again. "Hey Rey." I lean down to her level and she squints at me again. "We have to walk because Hux took my jeep. Is it okay if we walk back to my place and then I'll drive you home?" She looks at me momentarily with a blank expression and then pokes my nose.

"Boop." She says in a high voice.

"Yes. Boop. Let's go." I grab her hand and start walking.

She hums quietly to herself for the three-block walk to my house and occasionally weaves, pulling my hand with her but she never let's go. About halfway there I notice she seems cold and make her put my jacket on despite her protests that she's fine. We finally reach Hoth Street where my house is and is also the notorious party block and she stops to stare at the street sign. A few of the houses still have lights on and music booming with people in the yard.

'Hoth," she says in a slur. I walk back to her and try to get her to move but she looks at me with a panicked expression before throwing up everything on the ground. I hold her hair back and wait for her to finish emptying her stomach while a few people from a nearby party laugh to each other.

I get her the rest of the way back to the house and walk her up the front stairs to find Hux and Gwen sitting on the couch eating pizza in the living room.

"Thanks guys, really could have used the car back there," I mumble to them.

"Holy shit, what happened to her?" Gwen says loudly. Her ears are still obviously affected by the sound in the bar and she's probably pretty drunk which doesn't help.

"You and your margaritas happened," I say as I put Rey in a chair. She looks up at me momentarily before curling up into a ball.

"Well you can't take her back like that, the RAs will bust her," Hux says.

"True." I agree and study her for a moment. "Gwen do you have some extra clothes in Hux's room that she could borrow?"

"Yup." Gwen leaves the room and returns with a sweatshirt and sweatpants. She takes Rey into the bathroom and helps her into them. I hear the two of them giggling loudly since they're both pretty sloshed. It's the blind leading the blind in there and I sit down to wait patiently. When Rey is finally changed I take her upstairs to my room, have her lay down in my bed, and I cover her up. I return a few minutes later with a glass of water and ibuprofen and she sits up and takes them silently before she lays back down. Her breathing immediately deepens and I run my hand along her hair taking in how sweet she looks. No, you can't be developing feelings for your mentee. I rub my hands on my face, get up to get ready for bed, and find a spot on the floor to sleep.

Rey's POV

My eyelids feel like they weigh a hundred pounds and I slowly peel them open. I blink and look around the room to find that I don't know where I am. The bedding is all black, the walls are bare, and there are random men's items laying across the desk and dresser. Then I smell it, Ben's Cologne. Oh no. Where are my clothes? Why am I here? What happened?

I hear something rustle at the foot of the bed and I crawl to the end and peak over. Ben sleeps peacefully on the floor with only a pillow and blanket. His dark hair is strewn out across the pillow and his lips are slightly parted. One arm is outside of the blanket and I take in the sheer size of his bicep and the outline of his pec above the blanket. "Psssst," I whisper and his eyes slowly open. He looks at the wall and rolls over to look at me through groggy eyes.

"Hey." He says as he stretches.

"Thanks for taking care of me," I say wanting to hide.

"You're welcome." He mumbles and sits up revealing his bare chest and I blush. "Here." he hands me a Gatorade and shakes ibuprofen out of a bottle for me. "You'll thank me later."

"What time is it?" He stands up and grabs his phone and I avert my eyes when I see that he's only wearing boxers.

"Almost 8." He yawns and stretches, the muscles all the way up and down his body tense and relax again. He turns to me and I look away before he can catch me. "What time is your class?" He runs his hand through his hair and I catch myself pausing again to watch his hand move up and back over his head.

"10 to 12:30."

"A lab?" He asks. I nod in response and he nods back sleepily in acknowledgment. Want to give me ten minutes to shower and get ready and then I'll take you to your dorm?"

"Okay," I say looking around.

"Make yourself at home." He grabs clothes from his dresser and walks out.

About ten minutes later he walks back in with wet hair and an intoxicating fresh shower smell. He takes his hand and runs it through his hair, shaking the water out while he does it. I catch myself staring once again and stand up to look for my clothes. "They're in a bag downstairs ready to go. You're going to want to wash them."

"Oh no. I didn't."

"Yeah, you definitely did. But on the bright side, there was nothing left in there which is probably why you're doing as well as you are right now. Gwen doesn't look half as good as you." He smirks.

He drives me to my dorm and I hop out onto the curb. "Really, thank you so much," I say and close the door. He waves and pulls away, making sure not to linger. I turn to see Voi standing inside the front doors with one of her minions, and she turns and walks away while I rummage for my swipe card in my purse instead of helping me.

A little before 10 I make my way down to the science building. For how last night went, I feel impressively good. A slight headache but really nothing else to complain about. My phone buzzes and Poe's name pops up.

Poe: Hey, hope you got home okay. I looked for you when I left but you were gone.

Rey: Yeah, I did. It was fun seeing you though. Sorry Ben and Hux are weird.

I silence my phone and walk into the lab room. There are a few students I recognize from the lecture on Wednesday with over a hundred people sitting at the various tables. Friday is the day that they break the lecture into four groups for labs for 2 and a half hours. I'm just happy I didn't get the 7 am group. I find an open lab table and take a seat checking my phone to see if Poe responded.

Someone sits next to me and a familiar voice chirps "Can I sit here." I look up to find Voi already sitting.

"Sure," I say.

We sit there in silence as a few more students trickle into the room and fill up the tables. "So." Voi quickly turns towards me. "What's with you and Kylo?" She asks in almost an accusatory tone.

"What are you talking about?" I don't look up from my phone.

"You two have been spotted together multiple times, he brings you coffee, you stare at each other across the dining room, and now he's dropping you off in the morning?" She leans forward. "I don't think Dr.Ogana would be pleased to learn that a Mentor is hooking up with a Mentee the first week of school. Especially not that Mentor."

"Whoa, you have it all wrong." I look at her. "We aren't hooking up. We were assigned to be partners for a photography assignment and my roommate is dating his roommate. We all hung out there last night and I crashed there because I fell asleep. Our relationship is strictly platonic."

She squints her eyes at me slightly. "Platonic? Please. Maybe you tell your faces that." She pauses and leans even closer. "I will tell you one thing, if you don't stay out of my way, you'll be sorry."

"Good morning section B!" Professor Snoke starts talking before I have a chance to respond. The door opens behind him and Ben walks in and apologizes. "Mr.Solo, you miss the first lecture and now you're late. I would try harder to take after your mother instead of your father."

"Yes Sir," Ben mumbles and moves to an empty seat by the window. That's the second professor to mention that they know Ben's parents which is strange to me, and what did Voi mean when she said Dr.Organa wouldn't be happy to find out about a relationship, especially one involving Ben. I glance over at him and winks as soon as our eyes meet, and I smile back.

"Platonic my ass." Voi sneers behind me.

I gulp hard at her words. Ben can't like me, there's no way. I look over at him getting settled in his seat. His hair is fluffy probably from driving with the top of his Jeep off again. He's wearing the same clothes he dropped me off this morning in but I notice something on his wrist. I focus on it and notice that it looks a lot like the small scrunchy I usually wear but when I look at my wrist, it's not there. Ben, who only wears black is wearing my white and yellow scrunchy on his wrist. He looks up at me and I hold his gaze until he smiles at me and I gulp again. I'm falling for Ben and I think he's falling for me. I'm in so much trouble and I need to stop this immediately.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

I wake slowly in my bed Saturday morning and wrap the sheets around me, taking in the fact that they still smell like her from the previous night and I breathe it in deeply. For some reason, she dodged me after biology lab let out yesterday and it bothered me for the remainder of the day. I tried to catch up to her but she darted between a few people on the sidewalk and I lost her, so instead, I was subjected to Voi's endless flirting and questioning as I walked back to the parking lot. When Gwen and Hux got to the house they tried to get me to leave with them and go hang out before a party that evening but I just didn't feel like it but neither did Rey because Gwen pouted about both of us being party poopers.

Around 9 pm yesterday, I texted her to confirm that I would pick her up at 11 the next morning, but she never responded before I went to bed. Sleeping on the floor the night before hadn't done any favors for me and I was exhausted. I roll over and grab my phone, slightly releasing the sheet to check for a response and find Rey's name is on my phone with a timestamp of 12:30 am. Weird that it took her that long to respond and all it says is "okay." My mouth instinctively turns down slightly at the corners but remind myself that she was probably doing homework and wasn't checking her phone.

An hour later I pull up to the dorms and she is waiting on the front step for me in the outfit we picked out for here Thursday Evening. She carries the boots with her and is instead wearing high top sneakers which I almost like better because it looks more natural. She looks stunning as she stands up and waves as I pull the jeep to a stop. "You're missing part of your jeep," she teases and I smile at her joking with me.

"Beautiful Day." I respond as she pulls herself up into the vehicle, her arms flexing slightly. "I decided to take the top and doors off so we could enjoy the warmth and sun."

"I like it," she assures and buckles her seatbelt.

"So I forgot to stop by my parents and grab a shirt from my dad, so I need to stop there quick, then we can go start working on whichever one you want to start with."

"Works for me," she says putting her sunglasses on and flipping her hair back over her shoulders and I find my eyes watching the soft hair brush across her shoulders almost in slow motion. I wonder if she knows that everything she does drives me crazy.

Rey's POV

Ben pulls out of the dorm parking lot and the warm air rushes around me through the open doors and sides. I instinctively reach for my hair tie on my wrist and grab the blue one I now have in place of my yellow one. I look over at Ben as I pull my hair back and locate the yellow one still on his wrist but I decide against asking for it back, I like that he wants to keep a little piece of me with him.

"My parents house is about thirty minutes away," he mentions as we slow down at a corner and the wind isn't as loud.

"Okey-dokey," I say and keep looking around, enjoying the feeling of the air on my face. I catch him out of the corner my eye look over at me and smile as I tip my head back to bask in the sun as he turns onto the main road through Canto.

He pulls off of the road and heads down some narrower roads that are missing the curbs and pulls into a secluded neighborhood. He stops to buzz through a gate with a code and I look at how crazy big the houses behind it are. They all sit on a couple acres of land and they tower over each other, seemingly just getting larger as we continue down the street. He slows as he approaches a large tan brick house with massive windows in front, a circle drive, and four-car garage. My mouth falls open as he parks by the front door and Ben hops out of the car.

"I'll be right back," he says and jogs to the side of the house while I silently gape at the house and try to find out what all the noise is that I'm hearing. It sounds like men yelling and what I think are chainsaws. I see movement at the front door and draw my attention back there to see Dr.Organa standing in the doorway.

"Did my son leave you sitting here in the sun with no roof?" I nod in response, unable to find words at the realization that Ben's mom is the President of the College. No wonder he wants to be unattached. "Come on in honey, I'll get you some water and food, I just made lunch." She motions for me to join her.

I hesitantly jump out of the jeep and follow her into the house, finding that the interior of the house is even more impressive than the exterior. There's a very classic feel to the house with two symmetrical grand staircases that curve up the walls, marble pillars, and shiny tile floors. It almost looks like a palace, or at least what I think a palace would look like if it was placed in suburbia. I follow Dr.Organa through the foyer and hallway until we reach the kitchen where she pulls out a stool for me to sit at the counter and grabs a pitcher of cold water out of the fridge and a glass. I watch her intently, she's around my size with a very soft face. Her hair is wrapped around her head in a braid and she wears light linen clothing.

"So what has my son got you wrapped into?" She breaks the silence as she puts some chicken salad on bread and hands it to me.

"We're working on a photography assignment," I respond quietly.

"For Maz?" She looks at me and I nod. "She's a close friend of mine. Always had an up and down relationship with my husband though. She's a funny lady."

"That she is." I turn as I hear a door by the driveway slam shut and a minute later the front door opens back up. Dr. Organa rolls her eyes at all of the slamming doors and the walls shaking in response.

"Rey?" I hear Ben's voice.

"Kitchen, Honey," Dr.Organa says not even looking up from the sandwich she's making.

He rounds the corner and smirks at me sitting at the counter eating. "You're getting in the way of us getting our assignment done Mom," he says, pulling out the chair and sitting down next to me.

"Eat," Dr.Organa orders and hands him a plate with a sandwich. "You don't come around very often and this time you brought a friend. So you'll eat." Ben doesn't argue and take a large bite of the sandwich.

"Rey," Dr. Organa says my name is such softness. "Your artwork is absolutely stunning. I was moved to tears looking at your portfolio. Where did you get the inspiration? They didn't provide your complete artist statement for me to read."

I swallow hard and I see Ben looking at me out of the corner of my eye, his jaw moving as he chews. "Well I grew up in a foster house in Jakku, I had to walk past the dump every day to get to school and I always observed the homeless children who lived there playing. It slowly just started to seep into my art until it was the subject matter of all of my paintings."

"Well, they're beautiful," Dr. Organa says as she cuts up strawberries and puts them in a bowl for us. Ben catches my eye and gives me a look to gauge if I'm okay, obviously aware of the lie I just told about my art.

Ben swallows and changes the subject quickly, knowing that I'm uncomfortable. "Is Dad home?"

"Don't you hear that racket?" Dr.Organa motions to the backyard. "Your dad and your uncle are fighting over the best way to take down the giant Ash tree in the backyard. I think they've spent more time arguing than actually working."

"Oh good, they're both here," Ben mumbles.

"Why don't you two use the studio downstairs? It's set up exactly how you like it, Ben." Leia offers and before Ben has a chance to deny the offer I answer.

"That would be great actually," I smile and he shoots me a look while chewing.

--

After lunch I follow him downstairs. He flips the light on and I find myself standing in a family room complete with a large tv and gaming system, various games such as pool and foosball, a bar and poker table to the side, and a large cushy couch in the middle. The walls are covered with various movie memorabilia. "Wow, this is crazy," I say looking at the posters and props from movies such as Indian Jones, The Blues Brothers, and Star Wars.

"My parents have quite a few connections and actor friends so that's where most of these come from," he says, trying to play it off as no big deal. "The studio is over here." He says as he opens a door and ducks under the door frame and I laugh quietly about how close his head is coming to the ceiling as he walks.

I round the corner and enter the studio, complete with hardwood floors and black walls. There is a giant set up of backdrops overlapping each other and 4 different photo lights all centered on the backdrops. While Ben sets up for the shoot and messes with some cameras on a table to the side, I find a stack of prints to flip through while I wait patiently.

"I spent a lot of time down here in High School," his deep voice breaks through the silence. "It was the only place I felt safe."

I turn towards him, he still has his back to me. "Clearly it paid off though, your work is gorgeous."

"Thanks." He turns and smiles at me. "I'm going to have you sit here." He gets a stool out and sets it in the middle of the backdrop and he grabs my hips after I've sat down to turn me so I'm facing the background at a diagonal. "Can you look over your shoulder and focus your attention on the front corner of the backdrop?" I do as he says and take a deep breath because something about being the center of attention, specifically his attention is making me nervous. I can feel my heart beating in my throat and I take another deep breath to calm myself. He walks to the side and turns a fan on which picks up the light fabric of Gwen's Kimono that I'm wearing and blows it lightly. Stepping back he takes a look at me and cocks his head to the side and then comes up to me. He stands right in my line of sight so all I can see is his chest and starts rearranging my hair. I feel him grab a section of hair and flip it to the side and brush a few strands over my shoulder. I risk a peek up at him as he fixes my hair and meet his eyes causing my heart to nearly leap up and out of my throat.

"Are you nervous?" He asks quietly. Him talking so softly is unnerving to me and I swallow again as I nod once. "Don't be, you look beautiful."

He continues taking photos of me for the next 30 minutes, moving me into different positions, messing with my hair, changing the direction of the fan and lights, and telling me to look at different spots in the room. The way he moves around the room is almost like a dance, so graceful and methodical that I'm mesmerized by him.

Ben's POV

I think I got the photo I want a while ago, but she's the perfect model right now and the photos I'm getting are amazing. She moves so willingly and gives me such soft expressions it's hard to give up the opportunity to just stare at her without it being weird.

"Okay one more," I promise and I move to help show her how I want her to sit on the ground. I have her pull her knees up to her while sitting on the floor and rest her elbows on her knees. I grab her and spin a little bit so she's sitting parallel to the backdrop and instruct her to look at me through the hole her arm is, making this the only photo I have taken of her looking at me. I raise my camera to my eye and my breath hitches as I look at her through the viewfinder. Her golden-brown eyes are soft but laced with the ferocity that I know boils just below the surface. Her hair falls softly around her face and she parts her lips ever so slightly.

My thoughts are interrupted as I hear the basement door from the outside open and two sets of boots making their way down the small flight of stairs in the back of the house. "Here we go." I mumble and put my camera down. Rey just looks at me from the floor, confused, listening to the sound approach.

"Is that Benny Boy?" I hear my uncle yell through the basement.

"The prodigal son has returned!" My dad yells as he walks through the door, his arms outstretched dramatically. "Long time no see Kid. It'd be nice for you to visit occasionally." He walks up to me, smacks my arm, and ruffles my hair.

"And he has a girlfriend," Luke says turning to Rey who has stood up from the floor. "A very pretty girlfriend. I'm his Uncle Luke and this is my loser brother in law Han."

"Rey," she says softly and reaches out to shake his hand. "I'm not his girlfriend."

"Reyyy," my dad says with an impressed tone. "How exotic." He smiles and kisses Rey's hand. He's always been kind of a flirt with the ladies, and apparently she is no exception.

I walk over to the table with my laptop on it and pack everything up, trying to ignore them.

"Benny, you should take my photo," Luke says in a mocking tone standing under the lights and flipping his hair back and forth like a model in the wind from the fan.

"Why would he do that when he has this angel here to photograph." My dad nudges Rey and she looks at me with large eyes and an alarmed smirk. She looks so uncomfortable and I know that's my cue.

"We really should be going," I say throwing my bag on my back and clicking all of the photography lights off.

"It was really nice to meet you," Rey says to both of them and follows me out of the room.

"The pleasure was all mine sweetheart!" My dad yells up the stairs as he and Luke make a stop at the bar in the basement.

I close the basement door as she comes through and let out a heavy breath. "Sorry," I say running my hand through my hair, fixing what my dad messed up.

She laughs and rolls her eyes. "I wish I had a family like that." I just look at her and feel a small smile pulling at the corner of my mouth.

"Yeah, I guess. They're pains but I wouldn't trade them."

"You two heading out?" My mom asks as she comes into the kitchen from the living room.

"Yeah." I walk over and kiss my mom on her cheek. "Thanks for lunch mom."

"Rey." My mom walks to her with her arms open and smothers her in one of her giant hugs. "It was so great to meet you. Please come back soon."

"It was nice to meet you Dr.Organa."

"Please, when we're not at school, just call me Leia."

"Bye, mom," I say quickly and usher Rey out of the door and to the jeep.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

On our drive to Jakku, I slip the kimono off and stick it under my seat so it doesn't blow away, letting the sun hit my shoulders. About halfway there, Ben spots a Starbucks and pulls off the road suddenly, ignoring my protests that he's going the wrong way.

"What do you want?" He turns to me, his eyes obstructed by his black aviator sunglasses as we pull into the drive-thru.

"Pushy." I roll my eyes and lean towards him trying to see the menu on his side of the car. He keeps one hand on the wheel and the other arm on the shifter so he's slightly angled towards me. I can feel his eyes studying my face from behind his sunglasses as I squint to read the menu. "What?" I don't look at him but see his face curl up into a smile.

"Nothing," he says chuckling.

"You're weird," I say sitting back. "Iced Vanilla Latte please."

While he orders for me, I dig for my wallet. "My treat." He grabs my wallet and puts it behind him.

"Pushy!" I yell and shove his arm playfully, trying to get my wallet back from him.

"Deal with it," he argues back, clearly not bothered by my attempt to fight him and shrugs.

The car in the front of the line moves and everyone moves up one spot, the jeep shaking a little as he moves it slowly.

"I enjoyed meeting them," I say softly, my eyes trained on a random spot in front of me.

"My crazy family?" He chuckles.

"Yeah," I think for a moment and he studies me again. "I can't remember the last time I had a home-cooked meal made by a mom." I glance at him and his face has softened. "And I can't remember the last time someone welcomed me into their home like that and made sure I knew I was welcome back whenever."

"My mom really likes you, I can tell." He shifts in his seat. "And you are welcome to come back whenever, just say the word."

"Thanks," I say with a smile as he pulls up to the window, turning to the barista who is already leaning out of the window with a coffee in hand.

--

On our drive to Jakku, the further we get from Canto the more Ben's jeep and all of his upgrades he's made to it begins to stick out. When we get there, he asks me to drive him past everywhere that's important to me and I direct him to the school and the mechanic shop because nothing else is really all the notable to me. We drive past the school slowly and I point out where the art room and cafeteria are and then I direct him down the road I used to live on. We drive past the little mechanic shop and tell him about working there and then I point out a little brick house a few blocks down. The grass is long and the maroon car that my foster mom drove sits in the front yard with a flat tire.

"This is the Unkar's," I say pointing at the house. "Where I grew up."

He looks at the house with a flat expression still hidden behind his dark sunglasses. The corner of his mouth twitches but he doesn't say anything for a minute.

"You lived here up to Monday?" He asks.

"No, I moved in with my art teacher once I graduated. She had a spare room for me to stay in." He acknowledges what I said with a nod and looks back at the house without saying aything.

"Anyways," I say, shifting in the seat. "If you turn left here, the dump will be down a few miles on the left."

Ben's POV

I don't know what to say as I look at the little brick house she points to with the broken down car in front. The shingles on the roof and siding are all warped from the elements and the dandelion covered yard is long overdue for a cut. This small house could probably fit inside my living room and makes me feel like garbage that I was just complaining about my home and family. Compared to Rey, I lived a pretty good life and it's not fair. She had it so much worse than me, and I sat around and spent my high school years feeling sorry for myself in my parent's mansion while she lived in this tiny house with foster parents who didn't even feed her and she persevered. She worked her tail off to get herself out of the bad situation while I sat and complained about living in luxury. What the hell was wrong with me?

"You have that shirt from your dad?" She asks and motions at my dark grey shirt as we get out of the car once I've parked at the dump.

"Oh yeah." I grab the neck of my grey shirt and pull it off, stuffing it under my seat and pulling the other one on. I look at her, my eyes hidden by the sunglasses and catch her watching me out of the corner of her eye. I smirk and pull the shirt on over my head, reveling in the fact that I just caught her checking me out.

I follow her around the dump as she looks for where she wants me to stand and she settles on a pile of broken-down fridges. She tells me that she wants me to go sit in one and act as if I'm taking a bath. She giggles as I throw my head back and close my eyes. We wander for a while taking photos in different locations, keeping a close eye on the clouds moving in over us.

She spots something to the side and tugs it out from a pile. In her hands is an old photo frame of a couple with cracked glass and chipped wood around the outside. Her face lights up with an idea and she smiles up at me, motioning for me to follow her. Rey has me sit on top of a pile, and she climbs up on a different pile across from me so my backdrop is a combination of the thunderheads coming in and the piles of junk stretching for what seems like miles behind me. I look down at the photo frame and furrow my eyebrows as she instructs and I hear the camera click a couple of times. When I hear the clicking stop, I look up at her while she flips through the photos, a frown forming on her face.

"You're too clean," she says climbing down from her pile and picking up a bunch of dirt.

"Oh no no no." I watch her apprehensively as she approaches me. "What do you think you're doing?"

She climbs up my pile and smiles at me. "Oops," she giggles and smears dirt across my shirt and throws it at me before she climbs back to her pile. "Better."

We take a few more pictures like this and suddenly there's a crack of thunder. Her head pops up from behind the camera as if on cue and she goes to move right as the sky lets loose and it starts to pour. "Wait!" She yells and starts snapping pictures before I move. She looks at them quickly on the screen after taking a few frantic photos and then motions for us to go.

I hop off of my pile and look up at her struggling to get down now that the metal is slippery. I reach up and she jumps holding my hand and we run back to the jeep, grabbing both of our phones and cameras and throwing them in the center console.

"Where's the nearest gas station? We can wait it out there!" I yell over the sound of the rain and thunder.

"You don't want to do that. Not with this." Rey motions to my jeep that is anything but stock. "That's asking for trouble."

"Well, we're an hour from campus. Looks like we're going back to my parents." I turn onto the highway and speed towards their house in the rain.

By the time we reach my parent's house, I'm completely soaked down to my underwear and socks. I pull into the open spot in the garage and turn the jeep off. I look over at Rey and she laughs, both of us laughing for a moment about how ridiculous this is. I reach over to brush some of the wet hair off of her forehead and her smile fades a little and her cheeks flush as my fingers brush against her skin.

"Now what?" She asks while unbuckling her seatbelt and trying to act normal.

"We wait out the storm." I shrug as we get out of the car and she leans over, shaking her hair out.

"Do you not check the weather before taking the top off of your jeep?"

"Too much work," I say, pulling my shirt up and wringing it out."

"Yes because it's so much less work than getting caught in the rain with no roof."

"Come on crabby, I'll get you some clothes from my mom."

We run to the back porch and quickly slip inside leaving a trail of water on my mom's floor. Rey shakes a little bit and crosses her arm as the air conditioning hits her wet skin and clothes.

"Mom!" I yell through the door leading from the porch to the kitchen. She walks around the corner again carrying a book and her reading glasses with a confused look on her face because she wasn't expecting us back. As soon as she sees us she bursts out laughing.

"Han you need to see this," she yells and my dad comes out of his office. I roll my eyes as he starts laughing too.

"Yes yes, it's very funny. I got caught in the rain yet again. Can you get us some clothes please?"

"Sure honey." My mom walks towards her bedroom to fetch clothes and a towel all the while laughing to herself and shaking her head.

"You know there's this crazy thing called a weather app on your phone," my dad teases and flicks my forehead.

"I said the same thing," Rey says behind me and I make a mocking shushing face at her.

My mom returns and hands us two towels and two piles of sweatshirts, t-shirts, and sweatpants. "Rey, the pool bathroom is through that door right there. Why don't you go change and get cleaned up there? Ben can strip here once you're gone and walk through the house to his bathroom with the towel." Rey nods and walks away and my parents head back to their separate activities.

I take a warm shower and dress in my dad's sweats. This is when I wish I would have left some clothes here because they're a little too small and fit weird. I head down the stairs and hear the TV coming from my parent's room and the sound of 80's music from my dad's office.

I find Rey curled up under a blanket drinking tea that my mom must have made for her on the back porch watching the rain. When I sit down next to her on the small couch, she throws the blanket over my lap, and I feel her shove her cold feet under my leg. She sets the mug on the table so she can snuggle further into the pillows and I put my arm on the back of the couch turning towards her a little.

"I could get used to this," she says with her eyes shut and I study her small soft face, a smile forming on my lips.

'Yeah me too," I agree quietly. She doesn't open her eyes but I see her mouth turn up a little.

"Ben." My mom wakes me up by whispering and shaking my arm gently. "Dinner's ready. Why don't you wake her up and join us?" I nod silently at her and she leaves the porch, shutting the door behind her.

I reach over and rest my hand on Rey's arm. She's curled up in a tight ball, her hands resting next to her face, her feet still up against my leg, and her face relaxed enough that her mouth hangs open a little. "Rey." I squeeze her arm a little and she shifts. "Rey," I say again a little louder this time. Her eyes flutter open and she takes a moment for them to focus before she turns her gaze to me. "Good morning," I say, smiling at her.

"What time is it?" She says as she stretches, letting out baby dinosaur noises. Her legs and feet stretch out, leaving the side of my leg and I long for the warmth of her touch to return.

"I'm not sure, but mom wanted me to wake you for dinner."

She smiles and finishes stretching. "That sounds nice."

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

I follow Ben through the house to the dining room still wiping the sleep out of my eyes and watching him walk. The clothes he wears are a touch tight on him and I can see the outline of his shoulders and butt bulging out as he takes each step. 'Whoa, stop you can't be thinking that' I tell myself.

On the table, there's salmon, asparagus, and rice along with a fruit salad. My nose gets a whiff of the freshly grilled salmon and asparagus and I can feel my mouth start to salivate. "Help yourself," Leia says as she walks around the table filling the glasses with water.

We pass the bowls around and I take a piece of the fish with perfect grill marks on it. Mr.Solo hands me the plate with the asparagus and I take a couple of pieces. When I get the rice and the fruit salad, I take a small scoop and pass them to Ben.

"You can have more than that," he says and spoons more rice onto my plate, frowning a little.

"Ben." Leia scolds him.

'She's weird with food. She always takes a little bit and says she's fine."

"I'm sorry for him Rey. He means well. I used to be the same way with my brother Luke."

"Why's that?" I ask.

"My brother Luke and I were practically orphans from the time we were born. Our mom died in childbirth and our father was a criminal hiding from the law so Luke and I were separated to protect us. I was raised by the Governor of Alderaan and his wife who were friends of our Mother's, while Luke was cared for by a close friend of our Fathers that had taken care of our Mother up to our birth. Luke lived in a much different world than I did. He grew up in Tatooine, which is very similar to Jakku, while I grew up in a gated community in a house much like this one. He was used to rationing food and skipping meals, so when he came to live here with us after Han and I got married, I didn't understand why he was so different than us when it came to food. He called me pushy too." She smiles and takes a bite of her salmon. "Ben doesn't know any different and he's just doing it because he cares about you."

I look over at Ben who is intently looking at his food as he chews, trying to hide his pink cheeks.

"He has a rough shell, but he's a good one," she says and looks right at me.

I look up at Ben and smile. "Yeah, he's pretty okay." He looks up and meets my eyes, holding my gaze for a moment.

"So tell me about this photography assignment Maz has you doing." Han interrupts.

We tell him all about the project and about getting caught in the rain. Eventually, Han and Leia move onto telling stories about Ben as a kid and Ben tries to get them to stop. I love hearing these stories and I nudge him playfully, encouraging them to keep going much to Ben's distaste.

--

After dinner, I help Ben carry the plates to the kitchen and do the dishes. I volunteer to wash if he dries as Leia and Han go to the living room and turn the tv on. We work in unison quietly, occasionally slipping a glance towards each other, the silence between us causing a point of tension between us. The plates are large and heavy but I notice how small they look every time I hand one to Ben. For being so gentle, he is a very large man. He reaches behind me, opening a cupboard to the left of the sink and I can feel him close behind me as he reaches to put the cups in the cupboard.

"Did you enjoy dinner?" He asks softly as he reaches up and puts the last couple cups in the cupboard.

"Yeah, I did. I've never had salmon before," I admit as he closes the cupboard and I turn around to hand him the last serving bowl, and am caught off guard by how close he actually is. My eyes are right in line with his collarbone and I look up at him, our faces only a hand width apart. He looks down at me and I wonder what he's thinking, his eyes searching my face, running up and down from my lips to my eyes a couple of times before settling on my eyes. I hold his gaze for a second, take a deep breath, and drop my eyes down, pausing to look at his lips, then at the floor.

"When is the rain going to let up?" I ask, stepping to the side. He runs his hand through his hair and dries the last bowl.

"Not until tomorrow morning." He reaches up and puts the bowl on the top shelf and I watch as his shirt lifts a little revealing his abs underneath slightly.

"So....?" I say, wondering what the plan is.

"I say we just sleep here tonight and then we can drive back in the morning. We have all of the movies Dr. Williams assigned so we can watch one of those.

"Sounds good. I'll text Gwen and tell her not to expect me back."

Ben's Pov

Did that actually just happen? Did we actually almost kiss? I could not have been the only one feeling that pull when we were standing that close. Right? But what about Poe? I'm sure there's something there. She told me earlier she went to the movies with him last night and that's why she didn't respond until late. Was that a date? Rose and Finn were with but aren't they dating too? So technically a double date?

She follows me back down to the basement and plops down in the middle of one of the wings of the sectional. I throw her a blanket and pull open the movie cabinet, squatting down and digging for the movies.

"Which one?" I ask.

"You pick," she says snuggling down under the blanket.

"Well, they're all Star Wars. Have you seen any of them?" She shakes her head to tell me she hasn't. "Then we're starting with the OG: A New Hope. I'll warn you though, the graphics are a little rough at times especially because we have copies that haven't been remastered."

I pop the VHS into the player and flip the tv over to the correct input. I grab my own blanket, switch the lights off, and sit down on the couch.

"Why are you so far away?" She asks from the other wing of the L shaped sectional and I freeze, unsure of how to respond.

"Uh, I didn't know I was supposed to sit over there," I say, standing up hesitantly and sitting down next to her. She grabs her blanket and throws it over me and then throws the one I had over us as well before curling up against my arm.

"Better. You can hit play now." She chirps and I smile at how cute she is.

We watch the movie and every time we hear a theme she has me write it down in my phone with the scene it occurs in and what characters are there. She comes up with her own name for each theme, some that are close, some that aren't even in the ballpark. The imperial march she keeps calling "The Dark March of Evil" which makes me laugh, but to be fair, she isn't completely wrong.

After the movie is done, she turns towards me, crosses her legs pretzel style so that her knees are resting on the top of my thigh and I can feel her toes under my leg. I stretch my left my arm out across the back of the couch next to her and scroll through the notes I made on my phone.

"So be honest, how was I with the names of the themes." She smiles at me, her face just slightly lower than mine so she still needs to look up at me.

"You were close on some. The Dark March of Evil is actually called the Imperial March." I look at her and she scrunches her nose up.

"I like mine better."

I roll my eyes, "That's not how that works."

"Sure it is." Her smile grows, her cheeks scrunching up and leaning forward a little. In the silence, I just look at her for a moment which is strange because I've never been this comfortable in silence with anyone else.

"I had a really good day Ben. I don't know the last time I was this happy or laughed this much." Her smile fades and she looks at her nails, the tone in the room noticeably changing. "I think I had myself convinced for so long that I didn't deserve happiness and that would just be my life."

"You deserve so much more than just happiness." I put my phone down on my lap and tip her face up by her chin, my other arm still rests next to her on the back of the couch.

"You think?" Her eyes are soft and almost sad.

"Rey, you're amazing." I search her eyes and drop my hand from her chin. "I don't know anyone who has been through that much and is still as optimistic, strong, and cheery as you. There is a light to you and it's contagious. I love being around you to the point that in this one week, there is literally no one else I'd rather be around all the time. I find myself missing you when you're not around and that has never happened to me because I'm naturally a loner."

She just stares at me, her face a mixture of shock and a little joy. It flashes blue with the rest of the room as the music of the credits stop and the VHS player runs out of tape. We sit in the silence for a moment until her eyes start to crinkle a little at the corners and her mouth turns up slowly into a smile. She places her hand on my cheek and I feel myself tense a little at the sudden contact.

"I enjoy spending time with you too Ben and I like this side better than the one I met on Monday. You're so sweet and gentle when you're not putting on a show and trying to be Kylo. You should be Ben more often. I like him," She drops her hand from my face. "A lot." She stares at me trying to gauge my reaction and bites her and lip which is enough to send me over the edge and lose all self-control.

My hand that was resting on the back of the couch moves to the back of her neck and I pull her to me slowly. We lean towards each other and I hold her a couple of inches from my face studying her, our breath mixing as I study her sweet face up close. She looks down at my lips for a moment and runs a finger across them before I pull her to me the rest of the way and our lips meet. She kisses me back sweetly, letting her hands move into my hair at the top of my neck and I wrap my arm around her small waist. She unfolds her legs never letting her lips leave mine and drapes them across my lap. The kiss is soft but hungry as we both keep trying to pull each other closer. I break my lips from her and trail kisses down her jaw and then down her neck lightly as she runs her hands further into my hair. I bring my face back to hers and look into her eyes for a moment and place a few more light pecks on her lips.

We hear the basement door open and Rey jumps back, settling herself under the blanket with her phone as I fumble with the remote to start the rewind process. My mom peaks around the corner. "We're headed to bed. Rey, I turned down the guest bed for you. Ben, will you show her where it is?" I nod and shift uncomfortably. "See you in the morning." She says before she walks up the stairs.

"Night mom," I call behind her.

"Good night," Rey says as well.

We hear the click of the door at the top of the stairs and Rey turns to me and giggles, kissing me playfully again.

"We're in so much trouble," she says, her eyes sparkling, and I pull her to my chest into a hug.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

I wake up to a ray of sunlight hitting my eyes from the window and shift underneath the soft sheets and down comforter. I pull the sheets to my face, take a deep breath, and close my eyes thinking about last night. After we kissed on the couch, he had pulled me to him and we had just laid there cuddling. Laying against his chest and listening to his heartbeat with his arms around me was so comforting and felt like home. He walked me to the guest room and gave me a goodnight kiss before going back to his own room. He was a true gentleman about it and I greatly appreciated that about him.

I grab my phone and check the time while stretching and yawning. 10 am, I should go find Ben. I drag myself out of the bed and tiptoe down the hallway finding two closed doors but I don't know which one is his so I walk back to the guest room and text him.

Rey: I don't know what room is yours. Are you awake?

I pull the covers back over me and scroll through my Instagram while I wait for him to respond. Looks like Poe was out flying with a friend yesterday from the photo he posted from the cockpit of his black and orange two-passenger plane. He took me out in that plane once and I could have sworn I was going to die or puke, or both by the way he flew. Gwen posted a photo of her sitting on Hux's lap in what looks like a basement with blue-lit walls. Probably the party she was begging me to go to with them.

The door opens slowly and Ben peaks into the room, his hair sticking up in every direction, he smiles at me but there's a weird air to him.

"We need to talk." He says sitting down on the edge of the bed and I sit up. "This isn't appropriate."

Ben's POV

"Because you're my student mentor," she says and I nod.

"Plus the whole Poe thing," I add and watch her face scrunch up and her right eyebrow raise.

"What?" She sputters at me.

"I see the way you look at him, there's obviously something there." I try to reason and she starts laughing.

"Ben, there is nothing between us. He's my best friend. He has been for years." I continue to look at her and she sighs deeply knowing that I need more of an explanation. "Poe's parents died when he was little so he lives with his Grandparents which you knew. What you don't know is that our social workers put us in a program when we were in kindergarten with other orphans that met once a month all the way through High School. The group was extremely close but Poe and I hit it off almost immediately and became inseparable. He's like my brother Ben. The two of us didn't have parents or siblings growing up, but we at least had each other."

"Oh." I put my head down feeling like a complete idiot.

"I agree though that the mentor thing is an issue." She says softly and looks up at me again. "What do we do?"

"You're my friend," I say matter-of-factly. "At least in front of everyone else. We have to keep this a secret."

"I don't want to have to hide my feelings," she says under her breath.

"I know." I grab her chin and kiss her lips lightly. "It's only for a short time."

We gather up our clothes from the dryer and get changed before leaving. Rey makes sure to thank my parents profusely for the dinner and allowing her to stay the night in the guest room. My mom basks in the attention and gives both of us a small box of leftovers from yesterday before we give both of them a hug and head out.

As we're backing the jeep out of the garage, I see Voi pulling into her parent's driveway next door in my mirror. Great. I push the button and close the garage door as Rey notices Voi getting out of her car and looking at us over the bushes.

"Hey, guys." Voi has an unreadable expression under her ridiculously oversized sunglasses.

"Hi Voi," I say in a flat tone and Rey waves a small wave.

"Whatcha doing? Here... together." She cocks her head to the side.

"Working on our photography assignment," I say loudly.

"I'm sure." She smiles a fake smile and her sunglasses rise up a bit with her cheeks. "Well, see ya." She spins and walks away and Rey and I just raise our eyebrows at each other.

Rey is quiet for the first few minutes of the drive and then finally says something. "Voi low key threatened me the other day over you."

"Excuse me, what?" I say in disbelief.

"Yeah. She told me to stay out her way or I would regret it. She told me our relationship wasn't platonic and she could tell. Obviously she's right, but she seemed pretty mad about it."

"She's crazy, you have to remember that." I say in an attempt to reassure her but it doesn't seem to work. "She's spent the last few years tirelessly trying to get me to sleep with her. I'm not interested in her, I'm interested in you, and I'm not letting her ruin that. So just ignore her okay? She can't do anything to us."

"Okay," Rey responds quietly and we ride in silence the rest of the way. I drop her off at her dorm and she hops out without a kiss so we don't tip anyone off. She waves and smiles at me and then heads inside. I take a deep breath and run my hand over my face to hide my smile as I watch her walk away. This has been a crazy week.

Rey's POV

The minute I open the door Gwen is nearly jumping on me for information. "Spill. I need all of the details."

"What details?" I play stupid.

"You text me at 8 at night saying you're staying at Ren's parent's house with him. First of all, you call him Ben and not Ren, which is the first sign something is fishy. Second, I text you back immediately and you didn't respond." She squints. "You are the freshman he's into, aren't you?" I don't say anything and start gathering my shower stuff. "I knew it. Omg, this is perfect. We can go on double dates and hang out and..."

"Gwen." I stop her. "First of all, breathe." I take a deep breath in and out and have her copy me. "Second of all, we're just assignment partners. Nothing happened. We were working on an assignment and got rained out because the jeep didn't have the hardtop on. We ate dinner with his parents, watched a movie, and slept in separate rooms."

"Fine." She taps her foot on the floor and crosses her arms across her stomach. "But do you like him?"

"He's attractive, I can admit that."

"And like totally hot. Duh. Like with that whole bad-boy vibe he has going with the dark clothes, jeep, AND motorcycle."

"Need I remind you of Dominic Hux. Ya know, your boyfriend?"

"Yeah yeah." She waves me off. "I'm telling you, you guys aren't going to be able to deny it forever."

"What's 'it' exactly."

"You know. All of it." She smiles and winks at me.

"Okay, well I'm going to take a shower." I point with my thumb over my shoulder, grab my shower caddy, and slip my shower shoes on. "I'm going to leave you here to keep freaking out about this."

I head down to the bathroom and take a well deserved long shower. I smile at the wall thinking about Ben, the flirting in the car, dinner with his parents, cuddling on the couch, and especially the kiss. I've probably been down here for an hour by the time that I'm all cleaned up and head back to the room, preparing myself to deal with Gwen again.

"LIAR!" Gwen yells at me as I walk into the room and I see Hux and Ben sitting on the futon behind her, both of them look extremely annoyed. "LIAR, LIAR, LIAR!" She keeps yelling at me while jumping up and down, smiling so I at least know she isn't legitimately angry.

I set my shower caddy down and tug on my robe to make sure it's secure. Putting my hands out in front of me, I move towards her like she's a wild animal and shush her quietly.

"No, you don't get to do that!" She says, still yelling and jumps up on her desk chair to escape me. "You!" She points at Ben. "And you!" She points at me. "Kissed, and you BOTH have the audacity to continue to lie to my face! And can I say how bad you both are at lying." I look over at Ben and he shrugs, his head resting on one of his hands.

"Okay fine." I concede and she hops down from her chair with an excited look. "You're right. We kissed. But that's ALL that happened."

"YES!" Gwen yells and hugs me before I finish my sentence and I grab the sides of my robe, making sure everything stays covered. She releases me and points at Ben."Oh you beautiful dopey man, I knew you had it in you." Ben looks at her shocked and Hux looks absolutely miserable in the middle as he rolls his eyes and stares at his phone.

"Gwen," Ben says sitting forward. "You can't tell anyone."

Her face drops and she looks at me. "Well, that's no fun. Why?"

"Remember, he's the student mentor for my Freshman seminar," I say quietly. Her mouth drops open in an excited shock and she looks back and forth between us and mouths 'I knew it.'

"This." Ben motions between him and me. "Doesn't exist outside of this room and the house. Okay?" He looks at Gwen and she nods. "Hux?"

"Are you serious? Yeah. Sure, I'll keep your affair secret." He scoffs and keeps scrolling on his phone.

"Since we have company that no one warned me about," I shoot a look at Gwen. "I'm going to go run back to the bathroom and change," I say as I start collecting my clothes.

"Actually we're leaving." Hux stands up. "We just came over because Gwen was pretending she needed us to help her move furniture again. We have a few errands to run." He turns to Gwen and gives her a kiss and opens the door.

Ben stands up and comes over to me hesitantly. We haven't defined anything yet and we definitely haven't made the nature of our relationship public with PDA. He puts his hand on my side and leans down to give a quick peck. "Sorry." He mouths and I mouth "It's okay," back. He leans down and gives me one more peck and is out the door.

As the door closes, I look at Gwen who looks like she is about to scream. "I am so happy." She says with a grin stretching across her face. "Mad that you two lied. But so so happy. You're happy right?" She grabs my arm out of concern.

"Yes Gwen, I'm extremely happy," I say genuinely and she smiles again. "Now can I have my arm back so I can put some clothes on and get out of this robe?"

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

Monday morning at 9 am I walk over to meet Ben at the Cantina to go through our photos from the shoot Saturday. Last night he was sending me some raw copies of the photographs before editing and they looked amazing so I'm excited to see what we can do with them today. I walk in and he's already sitting there and from the look of the table which is covered with papers, granola bar wrappers, and three empty coffee cups, he has been for a while.

"Hey, you," I say quietly, sitting next to him at the four-person table so I can easily see the computer.

"Hey," he says not looking up from the screen but reaching behind the laptop and grabbing a coffee. "Here, I got you your foo-foo coffee." He hands it to me and I take a sip looking at his furrowed eyebrows as he focuses on the computer screen. I've learned that he doesn't really care for the espresso drinks with milk and copious amounts of sugar like I do and has even coined them with his own ridiculous nickname.

"Ooo what is this?"

"Vanilla and Caramel latte. You like it?" His brown eyes glance at me for a moment and then back at the computer screen before I respond.

"Amazing. Much better than your boring black coffee," I tease as I set it down and look at the screen to find that he's working on editing a photo of me in the last pose we did that day. I'm sitting on the floor, looking at the camera through a space in my arm, my head resting in my hands. I've honestly never seen myself look like that and it shocks me. "Holy cow, I look..."

"Amazing." He finishes my statement, a small smile curling his lips up. "I took all of those photos of you not looking at the camera because I usually don't like eye contact made in photos, but this," He sits back and takes a breath. "This is something else Rey. I can't not use this one."

I look up at him and smile. "Someone has a crush," I whisper.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." A smile turns up the corner of his lip further and he goes back to editing while I get my textbook out to finish a reading for my Painting class. Once he's done, he passes me his laptop and we flip through the photos that I took at the dump. He has me pick three and then helps me go through the editing process because Photoshop is a complicated program but he knows it like the back of his hand. By the end, I have three photos of him, two of him before the rain hit. You can see the large clouds and rows of junk behind him. In one he looks at the picture frame sadly, and one he lays on his back and looks at the sky. The last one I took right after it started pouring. He sits on the pile, one leg up and one leg dangling in front of him with his shoulders slumped a little. The picture frame hangs limply in one hand and he's looking at the camera, his eyebrows slightly knitted together and his mouth turned down. The combination of his pose, face, the rain, and the surroundings creates a beautiful photo.

"You know what this makes me think of?" I ask, looking at the third photo. "It's a visual of what I imagine you felt like in High School."

"You're not wrong." He studies it a little longer and his mouth twitches. "Actually you're pretty spot on." He saves the photos and sends them to me over email before closing his computer with a satisfying click. "Food?"

"I'm meeting Rose, Finn, and Gwen actually," I look at him and he looks defeated. "Join us?"

He pauses, thinking about it for a moment before agreeing. "Okay."

Ben's POV
I follow behind Rey as we walk up to the table where Rose, Gwen, and Finn are sitting and set our bags down. Rose and Gwen are talking to each other and Finn is sitting across from Rose reading from a textbook as he shoves alarmingly large bites in his mouth. Rey says a couple of things to them and Finn continues to ignore our presence. I watch him almost scared that he's going to choke due to how fast he's eating. Rey and I leave the group for a moment to go get our food, and I spot Voi and her minions watching us from across the dining room, noticing that she looks royally ticked off watching me walk with Rey.

Once I return to the table after getting my food, I find Rey sitting across from Gwen with Finn to her left. Poe sits on the other side of Finn and looks over his head to glare at me as I sit next to Rey, making sure to not make eye contact back.

"So Ren, Rey was just saying you took an amazing photo of her Saturday, I would love to see it," Gwen says excitedly to me over the table and Rose agrees.

"Oh, here." I pull my phone out and open it in my camera roll before passing it to Gwen. Rose leans over to look at it as well and both of their eyes bulge out.

"Holy Shit! Rey! You look amazing!" They both rave over the photo. "Guys." Rose interrupts the guys' hushed conversation. "Doesn't she look amazing?" She holds the phone up for them across the table and they agree with mumbles and nods. "You're very talented Kylo. That's beautiful," Rose says to me as she hands the phone back with a smile.

"Kylo?" I hear Poe snort from the other end of the table. "You're still keeping that stupid facade up?"

"Poe," Rey warns under her breath.

"What? I just think we're a little old for pretend names don't you think? Whatcha trying to hide Ben?" Poe jeers at me.

"Poe stop it," Rey says again.

"Oh let up Rey, you don't need to keep defending your little boy toy."

Rey and I both look at Gwen shocked. "I swear, I didn't say anything," she says and puts her hands up in the air.

"Say anything about what?" Finn perks up and Rey doesn't make eye contact with him. Rose looks down and busies herself with her pasta, obviously not a fan of confrontation.

"Wait. Are you serious Rey? Him?" Poe gestures at me.

"Poe knock it off," Rey demands.

"I know that you can stoop low sometimes, but not that low, jeez." He shoves a large fork full of food into his mouth.

"I'm gonna go," I say quietly to Rey and stand up. "I'll see you in class."

She looks up at me with a pleading look and I know she feels torn over what she should do. "Stay and finish your food. I'm fine," I lie and walk away from the table.

"Yeah walk away, do what you're best at, and run away with your tail between your legs. The great Kylo Ren. I've seen that plenty of times before."

"Enough Poe." I hear Rey demand before I'm out of range to understand what they're saying.

Rey's POV

"You okay?" Gwen mouths across the table at me and I shrug. Poe has returned to his same hushed conversation with Finn on the end of the table and the three of us girls just sit in silence while we eat the remainder of our lunch. I don't know what Poe has against Ben but it's some deep-rooted issue. Even Hux reacted weirdly to Poe the day I moved in.

After dumping our trays, the three girls walk together with the guys trailing behind us to the main lawn and we part ways to go to our separate buildings. Rose and Finn fall into step next to me as we walk down the steps to the lower level door of the music building.

"What was that all about?" Rose asks me now that we're out of range of Poe.

"I have no idea. There's some issue between those two from High School but I don't know what it is," I answer with a sigh, looking straight ahead and shifting my bag in my arms.

"You've been hanging out with him a lot," Rose says across me to Finn. "Has he said anything?"

"It's not my place to say," he responds and Rose rolls her eyes at him.

"You've been hanging out with Poe a lot?" I ask Finn.

"Yeah, here and there since Wednesday." He shrugs.

"Here and there?!" Rose questions loudly. "Rey, they've been inseparable. The three of us hung out Saturday night and it's like I didn't even exist, then this bozo ditched me yesterday to hang out with Poe again so I had to sit through Star Wars alone to finish this assignment."

"You're getting close, huh?" I ask Finn.

"I guess you could say that," Finn says sheepishly, his dark complexion flushing a little. I look at him a little longer. 'Is Finn developing a crush... on Poe?' I smile at the thought.

As the clock clicks to noon, Dr.Williams arrives and collects our character themes homework and starts the lecture for the day. Today he's having us watch clips from old horror movies and we're talking about the music and the use of silence in horror movies. I watch the analog clock turn at an insanely slow rate and try to not focus on the absence of Ben. Halfway through class, I can't take it anymore and get out my phone to text him.

Rey: "Where are you?"

At the end of class, Dr.Williams stops the lecture to go over a PowerPoint that the Mentor committee sent to him for the freshman.

"Ben emailed me and told me he was sick so I'm going to go over his portion of the presentation about homecoming for him," Dr.Williams says as he flips to the next slide. I frown and look at my phone but there's no response. I saw him 40 minutes before class and all morning and he wasn't sick, so I'm sure this is all because of the Poe thing.

Dr.Williams dismisses the class and I pick up my bag into a bear hug. Finn and Rose part ways with me as they head to the library and I head back to the dorm at the top of the stairs by the main lawn. I pull out my phone and try to call Ben. It rings until it reaches the voicemail and I hang up before it beeps, my frown deepening, and I shove the phone back into my pocket.

"Rey." I hear a breathless male voice come from someone running up behind me, and I turn to find Poe.

"What?" I snip at him.

"Please don't be mad at me. I'm sorry," he says and tries to take my bag to carry it as we walk but I move it quickly away from him.

"I'm not the one you need to apologize to."

"You're going to make me apologize to him?"

"Uh yes." I snap at him as we continue walking.

He walks silently by me for a second. "Ok fine." He stops and turns me, grabbing my shoulders. "But only if you agree to go grab coffee with me. I miss my friend, I've barely seen you all week."

I glare at him for a second and then agree grudgingly. He smiles at me and we turn around to walk back to the Cantina Cafe.

Chapter Text

Ben's POV

I sit by the second-floor window reading in my favorite practice room in the music building because this is always where I go when I need to be alone, so naturally, I came here immediately after the lunch fiasco. I spot Rey walking up the stairs with Rose and Finn as they leave out of the side basement door of the building below me. They go their opposite directions at the top of the stairs and she takes her phone out of her pocket as she walks. I watch as she puts it to her ear and I jump as my phone starts buzzing on the piano across the room. It moves slightly across the surface with each buzz and then stops, leaving me in the silence again as I look back down at her as she pulls the phone from her ear and frowns at it, shoving it back into her pocket. I feel bad avoiding her, but at the same time, I don't know what to do because I can't make her choose between her friend and me especially when Poe was all she had growing up. The issues Poe and I have are too deep to be solved overnight and I don't want to put her in the middle of that.

I hear the muffled sound of someone yelling her name and spot Poe running up behind her. He falls into stride with her and I smirk when he tries to take her bag and she refuses. 'She's so headstrong.' They walk a little further and he stops her, looking into her eyes with his hands on her arms. I feel a pang of jealousy watching them which intensifies as they turn around and walk back to the Cantina together.

Rey' POV

Poe drops me off at my dorm later that afternoon after a couple of hours of catching up. He and I had a nice time together and neither of us brought Ben up because both of us agreed it was easier to let it go and move on. I unlock my door and Gwen isn't anywhere to be found so I sit down and start working on my homework. I need to figure out exactly what I'm going to say about my photography tomorrow morning in class so that is my top priority.

It's around 4 o'clock when I check my phone again and see that there isn't anything from Ben so I text him again but then at 5 o'clock he still hadn't responded so I text him for the third time. Gwen comes home around 5:30 carrying a bag from Chick-Fil-A and drops it on my desk. "Gotcha some food. Hux and I ran there because I was craving waffle fries."

"Thanks," I say, continuing to type on the PowerPoint for tomorrow while grabbing fries out of the bag and shoving them in my mouth. The appearance of a blue bubble signifying that Ben is on the shared presentation at the top of the screen catches my attention. I grab my phone and try to call him but he doesn't answer, and his bubble disappears.

"Hey, have you seen Ben today?" I turn in my chair and look at Gwen who's sitting on the futon eating her fries and reading from a large textbook.

"No." she shakes her head. "Even Hux hasn't seen him."

"He didn't come to class at noon after the whole lunch issue."

"He does that sometimes. Something will get to him and he'll go dark for a bit." She shrugs.

I turn back around in my chair and finish the PowerPoint and shoot him another text.

Rey: Since apparently you're not going to respond... I finished the presentation. Take a look at it and make sure it looks ok before tomorrow

I knock on the door and hold my breath. It's 10 at night and showing up at someone's house is kind of a bold move but lights are on so I'm assuming someone is here. I hear footsteps coming and I feel like I'm going to puke as they get closer.

The door opens and Hux's pointed face stares back at me.

"He's not here," he says with a blank face. I can't tell if this guy is just permanently unenthusiastic or if it's just me. I've seen him actually smile maybe once.

"Do you know where he is?" I ask.

"Could be anywhere really. When he goes dark he's impossible to find."

I look down the street trying to figure out what to do. I'm learning that him "going dark" is a common thing based off of how nonchalant both Hux and Gwen are being.

"Why don't you come in and wait. He's bound to come back eventually to sleep." He gestures for me to walk inside and I obey. "You want something to drink? Eat? Um... I don't know. I'm not the host type."

"Hux, it's fine. You don't need to entertain me," I assure him, sitting down in the living room chair.

"Okayyyy." He rocks back on his heels and then sits down on the couch. "What do you want to watch?"

"Whatever you're watching is fine."

"Okay," he says and hits play. It's some stupid animated show and I mindlessly watch it trying to not stress about Ben.

Hux is clearly uncomfortable because every few minutes he shifts his nervous glance towards me and then looks back at the tv. What Gwen see's in him is beyond me but as long as she's happy.

Ben's POV

The campus security comes around a little before Midnight and tells me I have 10 minutes before they lock the building up so I need to go home. I seriously consider hiding somewhere for lockups and just staying here tonight but I know I'll feel better if I get a good night's sleep.

It's a little after midnight when I pull into the driveway and the lights are on in the living room and kitchen which means Hux is still up. I was really hoping he would be asleep by the time I got back so I wouldn't need to talk to him because I'm sure he's heard everything from Gwen. I walk up to the door and hear the tv, God, 'he's watching that stupid animated show with the scientist and the kid again.'

I shove my key in the door, open it, and immediately see Rey sitting in the chair looking at me. Shit.

"Oh thank God," Hux says wiping his hands on his pants and nearly running out of the room. He doesn't like small talk and I don't know how long she's been here, but I'm sure it was torture for him.

I set my bag on the floor and throw my keys on the table, trying to formulate some words to say in response to her unannounced presence. When I look back at her, she's standing with her hands twisted in front of her from nerves.

"Ben," she nearly whispers and I draw a breath in as she says my name. "I'm sorry."

I shake my head and walk towards her, grab the sides of her shoulders, and look at her briefly before pulling her into a hug and I feel her let out a huge breath as she melts into me. We just stand there for a few moments holding each other before I finally muster up the courage to do what I know I have to do next.

"Rey, I need to tell you something," I say softly and she looks at me, fear flashing into her eyes. I sit down on the couch and have her sit next to me. She sits, not taking her eyes off of me. "Do you know the story behind why Poe hates me so much?

"No."

"He's never told you?" My eyes are serious when I look at her and she shakes her head slowly at me. "Ok. This is going to hurt, and I don't think you'll look at me the same way after I tell you."

I take a deep breath and grab her hand, putting the other one on the back of the couch to brace myself in a way. "Do you remember Poe's High School girlfriend Keri?" She nods at me. "Do you know what happened to her?"

"She was in the passenger seat of Poe's car when they were t-boned by another car at excessive speeds and it hit directly on her door. She died on impact.," she says softly looking at the floor, I wonder if she knows where this is going.

"The driver of that other car was me." Her eyes flash up to mine and I can see the hurt behind them. "I was low. Actually that night was the lowest I had ever been. I was driving reckless because that was the only way I could feel anything and I blew a stop sign. I had blown that stop sign millions of times before and nothing ever happened. There was never another car. Until..."

"Until there was." She finishes my sentence while staring at the ground. She's still holding my hand but I can feel her shaking.

"Yeah. Until there was. I knew I messed up and that I needed help. I admitted myself to the mental hospital in Canto that night with the assistance of the police before I hurt anyone. The courts let me off on most of the charges because they chalked it up to mental illness and they awarded me for admitting my wrongs and turning myself in as a minor. I'm not saying I agree with the decision, frankly, I believe I should be locked up for it, but because I wasn't an adult yet and was ill, they let it go. Poe never let it go though, and I don't blame him one bit." I look at her but she's still just staring at the ground. "I live with this every day and every night, it destroys me on a daily basis but I got a second chance at life, and I'm not going to waste it. I'm trying to make up for my mistakes, but I also know I will forever need to live in the shadow of what I did to Keri and Poe, and their family and friends."

I look at her, her head is tipped down and her eyes are shut. After a few minutes of sitting in silence, I speak again. "Rey," I say softly and she looks up at me, her eyes filled with tears. "Please, just tell me what's going through your head."

She opens her mouth and stares at me for a second before speaking. "They were on their way to get me." She shuts her eyes again. "I remember sitting at home wondering where they were and they never showed up. I got a call from Poe's grandma the next morning to tell me that Keri was dead." She releases my hands and wipes them on her pants.

"Rey," I say putting my hand on her arm and she flinches.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Her face is serious and accusatory.

"I didn't know how. I know that sounds like a cop-out, but it's true," I say almost in a whisper.

"I need to process this." She stands up and I follow her to the door.

Rey's POV

I open the door and stand on the porch letting the cool air hit me. I suddenly feel ill so I grab the pillar of the porch to steady myself and I vomit over the railing into the bushes. I see Ben walk away out of the corner of my eye and when he returns he has a water bottle in his hand and a tissue in the other.

"Where does this leave us." He asks, his head ducked a little like a dog who's in trouble as I wipe my face with the tissue and take the water bottle from him.

"I don't know," I answer honestly. "I'm really torn because I know you weren't okay and were low so I can't hold that against you. I wish you wouldn't have driven recklessly to begin with and I especially wish it wasn't you who hit them but I know you didn't mean to. I can tell how bad you feel, truly I can, and it makes it a little easier to deal with, but Ben, you didn't see him after that. He wasn't normal Poe for over a year. The summer before he moved here, was the first time he was actually somewhat okay. He loved her more than anything and it nearly killed him. Have you ever loved someone that much? Because I sure as hell haven't." I shake my head at the ground before continuing because I can't bear to look at his sweet face. "I don't know how to look at my best friend and tell him that I need him to get over the fact that my boyfriend killed the possible love of his life."

"I didn't know I was your boyfriend," he says in a confused, soft voice.

"You're not." I take a deep breath and brace myself for what I'm about to say. "And I don't think you can be."

I look at him and I can see the hurt in his eyes. I want to hold him and comfort him but I know that'll just make things worse. "I should go," I say as I make my way down the stairs to the dorm.

"I can give you a ride," he offers.

"That's really okay," I argue.

"Rey, I'm not letting you walk home alone, so either you let me give you a ride or I'm going to follow you until I know you're safe."

"Okay," I concede, knowing he won't back down and wait for him to grab his keys from inside.

The drive to my dorm is quiet and uncomfortable. We're both hurting and I don't know what to do about it. I'm a fixer, but there is physically nothing I can do to mend either of our wounds besides let time run its course.

He pulls up to the dorm and I put my hand on the handle to get out. "Ben." He looks over at me, one hand on the steering wheel, the other on the shifter. "Please don't be distant," I say and jump out of the jeep. He watches me go and I turn when I reach the door and give him a small wave. It's obvious how hurt he is but he smiles slightly and waves back as he puts the Jeep in drive.

When I walk into the door of our dorm, the lights are still on and Gwen is sitting on the futon waiting for me.

"I thought you would be asleep," I say while taking my shoes off.

"Hux text me and told me what was going on so I waited up." She lifts her phone a little. "How much did he tell you?" She pulls her mouth into a straight line.

"Everything," I say as a sob escapes and I crumple onto the futon next to her. She pulls me to her and holds me and I freeze for a second, not accustomed to this feeling, and then relax again.

"He's changed," she says softly. "Trust me. The same guy that hit Keri is not the same guy you know. He went through some shit back then."

"But Poe," I say between sniffles.

"Talk to him," she says while stroking my hair.

She holds me for a while and just lets me cry. We finally crawl into bed a little before 2 and I spend a good chunk of what's left of the night staring up at the ceiling unable to shut my brain off. I could love Ben, I know I could, but I don't know if I can look past this, and I know that I can't hurt Poe like that.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

I make it to the building just in time and slip into the classroom right as the clock ticks to 8 am and Maz greats the class. I look at Rey as I walk through the door, and when she sees me she lets out a visible sigh of relief. I rush to the seat and sit down next to her slipping my jacket off and hanging it over the back of my chair.

"I thought you weren't going to show up," she whispers to me.

"I wouldn't do that to you," I whisper in response, still looking at the front of the room towards Maz talking.

Maz explains how we're going to get through the presentations and the peer grading system before she calls up the first group. I bounce my leg nervously through all of them, but it intensifies as the group directly ahead of us in the alphabet gives their presentation. I don't know if it's a result of nerves or the amount of coffee I've drunk this morning to make up for the lack of sleep but it's clear it's bothering Rey when she puts her hand on my knee to make me stop.

"Palpatine and Ren," Maz calls out from the desk she has perched herself on in the back of the room and we move to the front. I plug my laptop into the projector, hit the present button, and the screen that Rey made yesterday about her work pops up. I give the cliff notes version of her cover-up description while flipping through the photos, talking about how she lived near a junkyard, and would always observe the children on the way to school and how it slowly seeped into her work. She watches me intently as I give a censored version of her story and I can sense her relaxing the longer I talk. I flip to the next screen, the photo of me in the rain appears and she takes over.

"I'm going to be honest, while the thought process behind my photos was the same as what Ben was just explaining in my paintings, this photo right here is nothing like I've done before. My artwork is about showing people in their current situation while looking towards something happy and hopeful. I tried that with Ben, I really did." She flips to the failed attempt photos. "But there was something missing that I couldn't pinpoint." She flips to one of the final pictures of me sitting on the pile holding the photo frame. "This man is a healed version of his former self. He has picked up the pieces and put himself back together the best he could. The image of him sitting on the piles of scraps and looking at the photo frame is representative of him looking back at his past." She flips to the final image of me sitting in the rain, looking at the camera and holding the frame. "Those are the eyes of a healed man who has done everything in his power to rebuild himself but is constantly reminded of his past. No matter what, he will always be reminded of it, it's his burden to carry and you see all of that emotion in his eyes. So that's why this piece is different, it's not focusing on a broken person, it focuses on a person who's healed but still has obvious cracks. But who doesn't have a few cracks?" She looks up at me, a small tear forming in her eye.

Rey takes a deep breath and clicks to the next slide and we move onto talking about my work and she explains my style, my process, and my intent in amazing detail. She skirts around the deeper cuts I told her about to protect me while flipping through photographs of my most vulnerable moments and memories. She flips to the photo I chose last night after I dropped her off at her dorm and I was sure she wasn't going to log back onto the shared presentation. The photo of her sitting on the floor and looking at me through the space created by her arm stares down at the class.

"Emotion has always been the focus of my work. I strip my photographs of all color and facial expressions by obscuring the faces and depend purely on how the body conveys emotion. But this girl is different." She looks up at me with an alarmed expression. "To put it simply, this girl has seen some shit. Look at that face though, I have never seen that much emotion in one snapshot and I've taken a lot of photographs. She embodies sadness, fear, curiosity, comfort, confidence, even lust." I see her ears pink as she focuses on the ground. "When I see this photo I see what I've been missing in all of my work to this point. My work has felt empty and bare in the absence of faces and color so I decided to make this the first color addition to my portfolio." I reach to the laptop and hit the spacebar so it advances to the final slide. The photo changes to color and jumps off the screen. Rey looks up at it with her mouth open and people in the class murmur a little to each other. "It took this girl to take my broken and dark soul and bring it to life. I met her a week ago and let me tell you, she's changed me already, she's brought color and light to my life so what better way to honor her than this. Plus it helps that she is one of the most stunning creatures I have ever had the pleasure of photographing."

The class claps and she looks up at me and smiles while I unplug my laptop and we make our way back to our desks.

"Thank you," she whispers once we get settled in our seats again.

"I meant every word." I look down at her, holding her eye contact.

"So did I."

Rey's POV

We get through the last four presentations and Maz releases us to go home after we have turned in our peer evaluations. Rose waits for me at the door so I pick up my still broken backpack and walk over to her.

"Well, that was something else," she states.

"Yeah, I know," I say sheepishly. "Hey, I gotta talk to Ben quick. I'll text you later okay?"

She says goodbye and leaves me alone in the hallway to wait for Ben. When he comes out of the room, he stops immediately when he sees me.

"Hey," I nearly whisper.

"Hey," he says through a heavy breath with a slight chuckle.

"Are we okay?"

"Depends what okay means." He runs his hand through his hair.

"Very impressive you two," Maz interrupts as she walks out of the room. "It's been a long time since I've had that high of a level of thinking behind that project." She pauses and pulls her glasses down, her eyes moving between the two of them a couple of times. "I think you two have a lot of talking to do. Just don't screw it up like your father." She says to Ben and walks away with a proud walk.

"Sooo?" I prompt awkwardly.

"Come with me." Ben grabs my hand and pulls me down the hall towards the parking lot. He pulls me into the art library next to the exterior door, locks the door behind him, and checks to make sure no one is here. "I need to tell you this and if you never want to talk to me again, then fine, but I need to get this out." His gaze is intense and he keeps moving closer to me as he talks. "Everything I said in that room is true. It's crazy but in one week, you've been a light to my dark disposition. When Gwen says I'm dark and mysterious and a loner, she isn't wrong. I keep people at a distance because it's easier and it hurts less when they eventually leave. I don't talk about myself because I don't think people will care. You've shown me that I'm wrong about both of those things in a week. A week Rey." He steps towards me again and I step back bumping into the desk behind me. "How you have the ability to affect me that much in a week is beyond me, but you did it. And I've loved every moment of it...." he leans towards me and rests his hands on either side of me on the desk I'm leaning against so I'm trapped, his face is inches from mine. "Because I'm falling for you."

My mouth falls open and I have to make a conscious effort to close it again while I search for the words I want to say but my mind is completely blank. I lift my hands to his neck by his throat and slip them slowly up and around to his hair, running my thumbs across his ears as he continues to stare at me. I take a moment to gather my words as we sit there and I study his face and hair. "Good," I say finally, flicking my eyes back to meet his and I break into a dopey grin. "Because I'm falling for you too."

I pull his face to mine and he grabs the bottom of my thighs and pulls me up around him like a koala bear not breaking contact from my lips. His lips continue to move in synchronized movements with mine and I drink him in. Eventually, I pull back, my hands still in his hair and he looks up at me with an almost drunk look.

"I need to talk to Poe," I whisper to him.

"Later," he says and pulls my face back to his as he steps forward and my back presses against the wall.

Ben's POV

"What are you in the mood for?" I ask her as we cruise through Canto in my Jeep. I had her help me take the top off before we left after she forced me to check the weather first.

"I don't know." She sighs and I look over at her. She has her head leaned back on the backrest, her right arm hanging out the Jeep, and her eyes closed. Despite it being pulled back in a bun behind her head, little wisps of hair fly around her face.

"Do you like burgers?"

"Do you like air?" She retorts without opening her eyes.

"Touché," I laugh. "I'm taking you to my favorite place that my uncle Luke used to take me to. It's a small little drive-in diner called Jabba's."

I drive her to the little diner I grew up going to every Friday after school and pull into a spot in the shade and she looks around frantically at the cars as I park. "Wait! We eat in the car?!" She looks at me with huge eyes.

"Yes," I laugh. "That's what a drive-in diner means," I respond as I hand her a menu and she wrinkles her nose at me in response. I reach behind me and pull out my film camera and take a photo of her looking at the menu, her hair moving slightly in the wind.

"What are you doing?!" She looks at me and laughs as I take another one.

"Class assignment for Film Studio."

"Oh yeah, and who said you could photograph me?"

"Uh..." I pretend to think. "Me." She laughs and pushes me as I snap another one.

I order food for the both of us using the speaker system by my side of the car. When the food arrives I hand her her burger and stick her soda and fries in the cup holders, pinning my cup of soda between my knees. She takes a big sip of her soda and I grab my camera to take another picture of her. She looks up at me with her beautiful hazel eyes and my heart skips as I look at her through the viewfinder and push the button down again. Throughout the remainder of the afternoon, I continue to snap the occasional photograph of her, filling the roll of film with snapshots of her face. By the end of the day, her shoulders are freckled from the sun and I drive her back to campus so she can finish some homework.

Rey's POV

Ben parks his jeep and walks with me up to my room to say hi to Gwen. I open the door and peek in to find Gwen watching tv and Hux passed out on the futon next to her. Her face lights up when she spots Ben behind me and squeals a little. Hux opens his eyes and scowls, shifts how he is laying and closes his eyes again.

'What am I looking at right now?" Gwen stands up and walks over to us, her hands clasped in front of her expectantly. "Are you two like.... together again?"

"We didn't really put a label on it officially," I say looking up at Ben as he runs his fingers through his hair. "But yeah."

At that Gwen screams and pulls us both into a hug by looping her arms around our necks and pulling us to her. Hux groans from the futon from being woken up. "Oh, I'm so happy!"

Ben kisses my cheek when Gwen releases us and tells me he's going to go so I can get some work done and I follow him out to the hall to talk to him quickly.

"I'm going to call Poe and see if he can meet me to chat. It's the right thing to do," I say quietly.

"Good idea." Ben checks both directions and then leans down to kiss me. "Text me how it goes."

"Ok. Bye." I give him one more kiss and watch him as he walks away down the hallway, pausing to look back at me and wink before heading down the stairs.

I return to the room and send Poe a text.

Rey: Hey, what are you up to?

Poe: At Finn's. Why?

Rey: Can we talk?

Poe: Yeah. You okay?

Rey: I'm fine, but we need to talk

Poe: :/ You at your dorm? I can be there in five.

Rey: Yep. I'll wait outside.

I walk down to the front door of the dorm to wait for Poe and see that Ben is still in the parking lot talking to someone. I move to a different window to get a better look and see Voi. Of course. He sits in his Jeep and she stands on the curb next to him. I can't see his face but his body language doesn't seem all that open and positive. She laughs and sets her hand on his leg and I feel a rush of territorialism but relax when he pushes it away.

I watch silently from the window until I see Poe pulling into the parking lot in his white and orange Charger. As I walk out, I keep an eye on Ben but trying not to make it obvious. He turns to me and gives me a friendly wave and I reciprocate. "Hi Voi," I yell and she gives me a wave back with a completely straight face.

I climb into Poe's car without another glance at them and he looks at me with a cautious face. "Where to?"

"Just go to the parking lot above the field."

He pulls into the parking lot and we get out and walk to the large structure that sits above the football field. I walk to the railing and sit at a two-person table.

"So.... What's up?" Poe asks me and I gulp my nerves down.

"We need to talk about Ben."

"I thought we agreed we weren't going to talk about him." He sits back and crosses his arms.

"I know... But..." I pause. "I think I might be falling for him."

"Oh." Poe stares at me in disbelief. "Wow. That's great."

"He told me about Keri," I say not meeting his eyes because I know I'm opening up an old wound. He runs his hand down his face, pulling slightly on his jaw. Over the years, I've learned he does this whenever he's stressed or tense.

"Before or after you fell in love with him?"

"'I'm not in love with him, but I can feel it happening."

"And what, you want my blessing?" He raises an eyebrow.

"I want to be upfront about it because you're my best friend. Look I didn't plan on this, I've known him for 8 days for heaven's sake." He still has his arms crossed but his expression has relaxed. "He thinks about her everyday Poe. He told me about how he was low emotionally and how the only way he could feel anything was when he was behind the wheel, so he would go out and drive like a mad man."

"Like me with my plane after she died," Poe says quietly. "Except it's a hell of a lot harder to kill someone else when it's just you in that capsule."

"He regrets everything Poe. He told me he wishes he was locked up and how he disagrees with their decision to let him go on the count of mental health." Poe raises both of his eyebrows and huffs a little while staring at the table. "He lives every day trying to be better because he recognizes how many people's lives he destroyed and he doesn't know how else to make it better."

"Why did he disappear after the accident then?"

"Because he wanted to get help before he had a chance to hurt anyone else. He admitted himself to the mental hospital with the help of the police that night."

Poe nods. "And at the end of the day, we aren't all that different." He says running his hand down his face again. We sit there for a few minutes while I give him a moment to think.

"Are you happy?" He says leaning forward onto the table and breaking the silence. I nod and smile at him. "Good, then I'm happy. I'm not going to be best friends with the dude, but I'll try at least to see him for who he is now since you're adamant that he's changed."

I lean forward and take his hands in mine. "Thank you." We smile at each other and he leans forward to tap his forehead into mine. This is a weird thing we started when we were little and just never stopped. "So, you and Finn sure are making fast friends," I say as we sit back in our chairs.

"Yeah, the dude is cool," Poe says leaning back and running his hand down the back of his neck.

"That he is. And Rose? Does she hang out with you guys much?"

"Not really no." He's not giving me much and I think it's intentional.

"Poe Dameron, what aren't you telling me? You're acting weird."

"Nothing I swear!" He laughs and holds his hands up.

"Not likely, but I'll let it go." I squint at him.

"Come on weirdo. I'll take you home." We stand up and he drapes his arm over my shoulder as I wrap mine around his waist. "Let's see if your boy toy is still being pestered by the girl with big teeth."

"She does have big teeth doesn't she!"

"Uh yeah." He laughs and we get into the car.

Chapter Text

Ben's POV

Thursday comes and Rey and I are grabbing an early lunch with her friends and Gwen in the dining hall before our 12 pm studio courses start. In the last few days, we've been inseparable but still making sure we look like friends in public. Of course, we're breaking that up with secret make-out sessions around random corners because I can't get enough of her and it's beginning to seem like she feels the same way. Apparently the conversation with Poe went good as well and he even said hi to me as he sat down which caught me off guard. Much better reaction to my presence than Monday so at least there's progress.

While we eat, Rey and I look at the rubrics turned in by all of the other students in our photo class as we were all required to grade each other. The comments are glowing and Rey beams as she reads each of them out loud to me.

"Oh my gosh, look at this one!" She points to a note on one of the pages and I read 'Just kiss already' in a girl's handwriting. I look at her laughing and focus on how her nose crinkles up ever so slightly when she laughs. Those speeches probably didn't work in our favor when it comes to keeping our relationship a secret.

After lunch, I walk with her to the art building and carry her bag for her but when we get close to the building, I ask her to follow me and we walk to my Jeep together.

I put my hands up in front of her and have her stop when we get next to the Jeep. "Close your eyes," I say and she obliges by covering her eyes with her hands. "No peeking." Her grin peaks out from under her hands and I look at her for a moment before reaching into the Jeep to grab the paper shopping bag and holding it in front of her. "Ok open your eyes."

"What is this?" She asks excitedly taking the bag from me.

"You'll see," I say as she opens the bag and smiles as she pulls out a new backpack that looks very similar to the one she already has. "It's the closest I could find."

"It's perfect, thank you!" She says as she opens the bag and looks inside. I hold open her old one as she transfers her stuff into the new one, she zips it up and puts it on her back striking a pose. "How do I look?"

"Like a whole new person," I laugh and throw her old bag into the back of the jeep as she jumps up into my arms and gives me a hug. "Come on goofball." I hug her back quickly and we walk to the art building together.

Today is the introduction to the darkroom and because I've had the class before, Professor Abrams asks if I wouldn't mind developing my photos while he explains the process. I only failed last year out of pure laziness and poor decisions so I appreciate that he recognizes that he can use me as a resource. I say I don't mind at all and go into the darkroom to get set up while he talks to the rest of the class. I've been very excited to see how the photos turned out since our lunch date at Jabba's and am hoping that I had them set right so this is the perfect opportunity.

The class comes into the darkroom after he takes attendance and I start to work as Professor Abrams narrates what I'm doing. I move seamlessly through cutting the film off the cassette and putting it on the reel. He explains what I'm doing as I move over to the side and start mixing the developer mixture. While I'm agitating the film, I lean back on the sink and look around the class trying to avoid Voi's eyes. The only light emitted at this point is that of red lights on the ceilings so it's hard to see but I have been able to feel her eyes on me the entire time. I soak the film and then hang it up to dry with the hope that by the end of class, I'll be able to develop some of the photos.

Professor Abrams lets me leave for a while as he works with the new learners on everything that I just demonstrated. I walk down the hall and lean against the wall, peeking through the window in the door of the painting room. Rey is focused, tipping her head back and forth as she works and scrunches her face up as she rolls backward in her chair a little and takes another look at her painting. 'I could watch her paint all day.' There's a giant blue paint smear on her forehead and I watch as she rubs her nose with the back of her hand leaving another purple smudge. She looks up at the door, spots me, and smiles, and I wave back and motion that she has something on her nose. She runs her clean hand down her nose and starts laughing as soon as she sees the paint that she just got off. I feel butterflies in my stomach as I watch her smile light up the entire room.

"Whatcha doin?" I hear a voice behind me that breaks me out of my trance and look over my shoulder to find Voi. "Your girlfriend in there?"

"She's not my girlfriend."

"Right. It's funny because she said the same thing about you and I didn't buy it then either."

"What do you want Voi?" I ask unamused and turning around.

"You know exactly what I want." She's moving closer to me and I'm running out of space to escape. "You two aren't going to last, I can tell you that much."

"Hey Voi," Rey says as she opens the painting door.

"Oh hey," Voi responds flatly, drawing out the 'y' and backs up from me.

"What's up?" Rey asks still looking at Voi. She smiles but her stance is kind of territorial and I have to admit, I like it.

"Just talking to Ben," Voi says in a nonchalant tone.

"It's Kylo," I correct her. Voi glares at me and I see Rey fight back a smile.

"Well, it was nice talking," I say and sneak around her, making my escape. I turn around and wink at Rey in thanks as I slip back into the photo studio.

Towards the end of class, we all return to the darkroom so I can demonstrate enlarging the photos. The darkroom is messy now that the newbies have been in here and I can't wait for them to learn how to work neatly. Professor Abrams narrates my steps again and I move with anticipation as I develop the first one. Everyone watches as an image of Rey appears on the paper almost like magic and they "ahh" in amazement. I hang it up to dry and everyone leaves the darkroom with Professor Abrams.

"Yeah, she's totally not your girlfriend," Voi sneers over my shoulder and leaves and I look at the photograph hanging from the string. You can see my hand emerging from the bottom of the picture and Rey's jaw rests on it lightly. She looks at the camera, her eyes just slits as a result of her huge smile and her nose crinkles up. The contrast of the black and white photograph brings out her freckles that dust her cheeks and shoulders. She looks so happy and my stomach flips looking at it.

Chapter Text

Reys POV

I convinced Ben earlier this evening to just let me stay back and not go to Thirsty Thursday with them, promising that I would go out in two weeks during homecoming. I turn the overhead light off in the dorm and click on the small desk lamp to give the room a comforting ambiance before settling myself on the futon to watch a movie. Once Gwen left I was able to finish the rest of my Biology homework for the lab tomorrow morning leaving my photography and music homework but I can work on those over the weekend. I flip through the channels aimlessly and settle on one of my favorite movies that I grew up watching over and over while waiting in the social worker's office.

I jump awake to the sound of someone knocking on the door and find myself lying on the futon with the tv still playing. I don't recognize what's on the tv and I check the time which reads 1:00am in red lights. I stretch and stand up as the person on the other side of the door knocks again making me jump a second time.

Reaching the door, I look through the peephole and see Ben standing there with his hands shoved in his coat pockets. I quickly unlock the door and open it to look at him, confused from just having woken up.

"What are you doing here?" I whisper.

"I missed you tonight," he whispers back, stepping into the door a little and I smell a whiff of beer on his breath.

"Are you drunk?" I ask with a smile.

"Drunk? No. Tipsy? A little."

"You didn't drive here did you?"

"No. Hux was the driver tonight, I went Rouge and walked here." He cranes his neck around the door frame and looks down the hall. "Can I come in so we can stop whispering out here." I back up and let him through and he lands with a thud on my futon. "Come here and cuddle with me for a bit," he says holding his arm out next to himself. I curl up next to him, setting my head in the crook of his shoulder, and wrapping my arm around him.

He takes a deep breath and leans his head on mine. "How was the bar tonight?" I ask.

"It was fine. Hux was being a pain so he and Gwen spent some time arguing but I think they're better now. Voi kept trying to dance with me, which isn't exactly shocking." I feel a wave of jealousy wash over me and I think he feels me tense up a little. "I didn't dance with her Rey. First of all, I don't dance. Second, if I was to dance, I'd want it to be with you." I grin into his chest a little. "But don't think that's me saying I'm going to dance. Just want to make that clear."

"We'll see about that," I challenge and he chuckles softly. We sit there for a while holding each other until I feel my eyes start to close. "Gwen isn't coming back tonight if you want to stay."

"I'd like that," he agrees and kisses the top of my head.

Ben helps me fold the futon down because there is no way that we're both going to fit on that twin bed lofted in the air due to his size. I grab the two pillows from my bed and the throw blankets from the small basket by the tv that Gwen brought. I make a quick trip down to the bathroom to brush my teeth and Ben heads downstairs to the boy's floor to use the bathroom as well. When I get back, he hasn't returned yet, so I change quickly into my pajama shorts and a tank top and crawl under the covers with the lights off. A few minutes later, he sneaks back in locking the door behind him. I watch his shadow which is slightly lit by the light streaming through the blinds as he takes his pants and sweatshirt off leaving them on my desk chair. He pulls the blankets back and lays down facing me and pulls me into his arms so that my head rests right below his chin, our legs instinctively wrapping together.

"Ben," I say and he grunts quietly to signal that he's listening. "I don't want to do anything tonight"

He tips his head down and kisses the top of my head. "I wasn't expecting to," he murmurs into my hair.

I tip my head backward and kiss him lightly. "Thank you," I whispers and kiss him again but when I go to pull away he resists and holds me there.

"I can kiss you though right?"

I laugh. "Well yes." I wrap my arms around him and he pulls my face back to him. We spend what feels like hours laying there and kissing, our hands cautiously exploring each other's bodies slowly.

He pulls me on top of him so I'm straddling him and he pulls his shirt off, revealing his bare chest. Even in the dark room, I can see a slight outline of his muscles on his arms and torso in the light from outside. I run kisses along the side of his neck and back up, pausing to nibble on his ear a little as I run my hands up his abs and to his chest making sure to take my time. He lets out a playful groan and rolls me off of him. "Alright, that's not playing fair," he laughs and nuzzles kisses into my neck, his hands running up my back under my shirt sending shivers through me.

"We need sleep," I whisper to him in an attempt to calm myself down.

"Later," he whispers against my mouth and kisses me again pushing his leg between mine and I take an involuntary breath in at the contact.

Ben's POV

I don't remember falling asleep but I wake up on my back a little before 8 to the sound of a door slamming in the hallway. Rey doesn't wake but shifts a little bit in my arms. She lays on her side up against me with her left leg laced over mine and her left arm resting in the middle of my chest lightly. I can feel the rise and fall of her chest against my rib cage and the brush of her breath at the base of my throat. I tip my chin down to look at her and brush her hair away from her face. Her eyelashes are resting lightly on her cheeks, the one smooshed a little in the dip of my shoulder, and her mouth hangs open ever so slightly. She's perfect. There isn't a single flaw present on this girl.

I let her lay there for a while longer before I decide we should get up if I'm going to have time to run home before the bio lab. I roll towards her and wrap my arms around her and kiss the top of her head. "Rey It's time to get up," I whisper into her hair. She groans into my chest. "Reyyyy," I whisper again.

"Nooooo," She says as she stretches slightly. She opens her eyes and looks up at me. Her expression is soft, almost confused from still being half asleep. "Can't we just stay here?"

"No, we can't," I laugh.

"But I don't want to go to lab. Professor Snoke is intense and scary, and he's going to make us cut things open today, plus Voi is there."

"That's reason enough to skip," I agree.

"See," she says trying to be convincing.

"Come on," I say with a grunt as I roll her over me and try to dump her off the futon.

"Hey!" She giggles as she tightens her grip on me and tries to take me with her. I roll her back so she's laying on top of me and she settles herself so she's comfortable. She looks up at the top of my head, resting one hand on my chest below her and uses the other one to play with my hair. "I love how wild your hair is in the morning. It's kind of sexy."

"So you're saying I have sex hair."

"Kind of yeah." She looks at me with a twinkle in her eye. "I mean, I'm not complaining though. I like it." She kisses my neck lightly and I roll her to the other side of the futon so I'm on top of her.

"You gotta stop doing that. You almost got yourself in trouble doing that last night," I say a few inches from her face, my hand rests on her side.

"Oops," she says with a mischievous grin.

"You're a tease," I say as I kiss her.

"I don't see you complaining," she whispers against my lips.

We hear a key in the door and I roll off of her as the door opens. "WHOA! My eyes!" Gwen yells as she throws her hands over her face.

"You know you have a room with a lock that you don't share with someone else like five blocks away right?" Hux asks as he walks in and leans against Gwen's dresser. Rey hops over me and starts collecting clothes to change into and her toiletries bag clearly embarrassed. I watch her butt as she walks and bends over to pick things up, her little pajama shorts barely covering it.

"Well, at least she's dressed. Can't say the same for you." Hux motions to my pants laying on Rey's desk and my shirt on the floor.

"You know you're worse than my father and my uncle combined Hux." I sit up and put my shirt on and walk over to put my pants on.

"It's bad enough I have to deal with you being half-naked at the house, now I have to deal with it here too?" Gwen jokes at me with a smile.

"You like it," I tease as I zip my pants up.

"Don't flatter yourself too much," she responds sharply.

"I mean I like it," Rey says as Gwen laughs, and Hux makes a gagging noise. "Give me half an hour and I can be ready, then we can run to your house before lab."

"Ok," I say as I kiss her and she leaves the room with Gwen on her heels.

"So," Hux sits on the futon. "Did you two... ya know?" He asks without making eye contact.

"What Hux?" I grin and cock my head to the side. "I don't think I know what you're trying to say."

"Yes, you do. Don't be a jerk."

"Sex? Is that what you're trying to say?" I watch Hux's ears turn pink. I get a weird enjoyment out of how uncomfortable talking about sex makes him. "You know for someone that has a very beautiful girlfriend who he has sex with quite frequently, you are weirdly scared of that word."

"How do you know how frequently?" His entire face nearly matches his hair as he looks at me.

"Dude we've lived in the same house for a year. With thin doors and walls." His face goes from red to white in an instance. Because our families lived within 30 miles of the school, we were able to live off-campus during our freshman year and pretend we were living at home while we were renting a house. Neither of us liked the idea of dorms so we did everything we could to avoid the "freshman live on campus rule." Gwen on the other hand decided she wanted the social aspect of the dorms with the backup plan of living with us if her roommates sucked. Secretly I think she just liked having her own space away from the Grump himself so the dorms were perfect.

"To answer your question. No, we didn't," I tell him.

"I'm impressed.," he says, raising his eyebrows.

"I mean there were a couple of times I thought she was just going to say screw it, but we're waiting until she's ready."

"I'm shocked you two can wait. The way you look at each other, it looks like you want to rip each other's clothes off all the time."

Rey's POV

"So?" Gwen puts her bag next to mine on the bathroom counter as she gets out of the shower, her hair wrapped up in a towel.

"What?" I ask as I work on braiding my hair.

"Did you two hook up?" She whispers.

I give her a look of disapproval but don't say anything.

"Oh come on," she pressures.

"No, we didn't," I say flatly. "Not that we didn't want to though. There were multiple times one or both of us had to stop and cool down before we went too far."

"Why did you stop?" She asks. "I for one wouldn't have been able to, have you seen those muscles?" I shoot her a shocked look. "Oh don't worry about me, his personality and mine wouldn't work out anyways. He's just nice to look at some times. I'm just saying if I was into his personality and his body, then I wouldn't be able to stop myself like that." I think about what she just said for a second and get stuck on the fact that apparently, Ben doesn't have the right personality, but somehow Hux, the killjoy himself does.

"I want to wait until I'm ready," I say matter of factly. "Trust me, I wanted it a lot last night, but this is new and I want to make sure this is more than a fling. Plus..." I trail off.

"Plus what?" she prompts and I shake my head as if to say nevermind. "Rey. Are you?" She mouths the words 'a virgin' in the mirror at me.

I look under the stall doors and make sure we're alone before I speak. "You must think I'm a loser."

"Why would I think that?" She scrunches her face up. "You're 18. More people are virgins at this age than you think anyways. Hell, Hux was until halfway through last year."

"Didn't you two start dating when you were a sophomore and he was a Junior in High School?" I calculate the time in my head. "You waited two years into your relationship?"

"I mean, we fooled around, but it never went all the way." She shrugs. "I decided I wanted to wait to see if we could make it long term, so I waited until the end of his first semester away from me at college. Yeah, I was thirty minutes away, but that's enough distance to get in some trouble."

"And?"

"And I found out he's either too into me or too lazy to pursue another girl, so he had a pretty great Christmas this past year." She grins. "I'm not judging you at all okay? You do it when you're ready because the truth is, most guys are always ready if they're into you."

"Do you know if he has, ya know," I trail off not knowing how to finish the sentence.

"I know you won't want to hear this, but I'm sure he has. He had a pretty serious girlfriend at the beginning of High School." I frown and look at myself in the mirror. "They broke up a few months after Hux and I got together so I met her a few times. Trust me, he didn't look at her at all like he looks at you."

"What do you mean?"

"He looks at you like a cheetah waiting for the right time to pounce on a gazelle. But at the same time, he looks at you like you are the most miraculous thing he has ever seen. Trust me, when you're ready, he will be too because he's already head over heels for you. He's just too much of a gentleman to ever rush you." I smile at her words and pack up my bag to head back to the room. "Hey, Rey?" She says before I open the bathroom door and I look back at her. "You got a good one, but he's fragile. Please be gentle with him."

"I will. I promise."

Bens POV

She rides with me down to my house and waits on my bed while I take a shower. We still have a little over an hour before class but I still rush so we have time to stop and grab a bite to eat before the lab even though she keeps saying she doesn't want to eat before doing a dissection.

I wrap my towel around my waist and go back to my room when I realize that I forgot a fresh pair of boxers. As I walk in she looks up at me and then immediately down my body as her face turns a darker shade of red than even Hux's this morning. I catch her eye and wink at her as I walk over to my dresser and the red moves down her neck to her chest. I debate just dropping my towel here and getting dressed just to mess with her but decide to have some decency and walk back to the bathroom.

After getting dressed, I go back to the room to get her to leave and she's laying on her side on my bed looking at the wall. She doesn't move when she hears me, if she even hears me, so I sit down next to her.

"Where you at Space Cadet?" I say rubbing her arm, breaking her out of her trance.

She looks at me and then at my shirt. "Aw, I liked the other outfit better."

"I can go change back." I point to the bathroom. "Heck I'll even go get baby oil to mimic the shine from the water. I'm sure Voi would love it too."

"Oh shut up." She sits up and wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me back down with her. I nuzzle up to her and hold her as she stops laughing slowly and stares at the ceiling. "Ben?" She says in almost a whisper.

"Mhmm?" I mumble into her neck. Her heart is beating insanely fast and I wonder what she's thinking about.

"If I told you I was a Virgin. Would..." She stutters and gulps. "Would it bother you?"

I pull my head back so I'm looking at the side of her face. She still stares at the ceiling so I turn her chin down towards me. "I'm guessing this is your way of telling me?" I ask and she nods, biting her lip. I run my thumb along her lip and she releases it from her teeth. "It doesn't bother me and I appreciate you telling me."

"You're sure?" She asks, still whispering. "Like you wouldn't rather be with someone who was more experienced than me? I'm sure I haven't done nearly as much as you."

"What did Gwen tell you in that bathroom?" I say tickling her lightly and she squeals. "But no, I wouldn't, trust me. I know a ton of girls who are more experienced and they don't have even half of the effect that you have on me."

"That makes it sound like you've been with a lot of girls, you know that right?" She says suppressing an awkward smile.

"Two," I say flatly. "My girlfriend Sophomore and Junior year of High School was my first, and then I had a fling last year with another girl who was in my Freshman Seminar for a couple of months."

"Is that what this is? A fling?"

"If it was a fling, do you think I would show up at your door at 1 am and be perfectly happy just cuddling without sex?"

"No. I guess not."

"This is definitely not a fling." I pull her to me and kiss her.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

It's raining by the time we leave the house at 9:30 so Ben gets the jeep and pulls it up to the porch steps so I can jump in quickly without getting too wet. He takes us through the drive-thru at a coffee and bagel shop and forces me to eat something despite my protests that it's going to heighten my chances of hurling during the lab. When we get to campus, he parks as close as he can to the building and we run with our coats over our heads to the Science building. Despite our best efforts, we're still completely soaked by the time we reach the building and he shakes his hair out at me like a wet dog when we get inside. "Stop!" I squeal and it echoes up the stairwell. I cover my mouth, realizing how loud that was and he makes a shushing face at me with his finger up to his lips and his eyes crinkling up.

When we walk through the door and onto the floor with all of the labs, everyone standing in the hall waiting to get into the room looks at us because they obviously heard me and Ben leans down to whisper in my ear "you really know how to make a scene" as we walk. We find a spot along the wall and lean up against it with everyone else trying to act casual and get the attention away from us.

A few minutes after the lab is supposed to start, Professor Snoke opens the door and the other class walks out, the strong smell of formaldehyde immediately making my stomach flip. I follow Ben into the room and sit next to him at the table I sat at last week. Five of the same people from last week sit down in their same chair around the square table, and I pray that the sixth does too before Voi sits down. As if on cue, I glance over my shoulder to see her walking towards us and she walks around the table to sit in the empty seat around the corner of the table from Ben.

"Hi, Ben. Hi, Rey," she says flashing her big teeth and flipping her hair.

"It's Kylo or Ren, Voi," Ben says while turned slightly towards me but she ignores him.

"Isn't this so fun? The three of us sitting together in a class?"

"Amazing," Ben mumbles.

"Okay, everyone. I trust you have found a seat you like. I'm going to pass around the clipboard, please write your name down at your respective table. This will be your lab table for the remainder of the semester. The person on your side of the table will be your lab partner." Which means Ben will be my lab partner.

As we pass the clipboard around, professor Snoke sets up for the lab and explains the steps of dissecting a snake. The smell alone has already made me nauseous so I'm not sure how I'm going to make it through the actual lab.

Ben's POV

I listen intently has Professor Snoke explains the steps of skinning the snake for the dissection. He pulls out one of the snakes on a tray, demonstrates how to cut the skin, then grabs its head with one hand and the skin in the other and pulls. The skin, which comes off like a sock he throws to the side and puts the snake back on the tray.

I look at Rey and her face is green and I wonder if she's going to be physically ill. "I am not doing that," she says as Snoke walks around, distributing trays from a cart.

"You record. I'll slice and dice." She grimaces at my statement.

"Why are you so okay right now?"

"Years of fishing and hunting with Uncle Luke. I'm not fazed by much anymore," I shrug.

Professor Snoke sets a tray with a snake down in front of us and Rey backs up, grabbing her pen and a binder to write on. "Nope. Not for me."

We move through the steps seamlessly. She reads off the instructions, I complete the action, and she records. She spends the entire class with her sweatshirt pulled over her nose and her eyebrows stay permanently furrowed.

Somehow she manages to keep her breakfast down even though a couple of times it looks like I'm about to lose her as she braces herself. Most likely in case, she needs to run for a trash can. At the end of the hour, I clean up our station and dispose of the snake while Rey finishes up our notes for our lab report. Snoke releases us and we head towards the dining hall, not running this time now that the rain has let up a little.

"Okay, I seriously underestimated you when you said you might puke," I admit.

"I told you!" She protests.

"I thought you were going to lose it a couple of times."

"I almost did multiple times."

"Lunchtime?"

"You can seriously eat after that?" She wrinkles her nose up and frowns.

"Yeah. I'm always hungry." I say and grin.

"I don't think I can eat yet." She says looking to the side, still frowning in distaste.

"Let's go get some to-go containers and then we can take it back to your dorm. I have orchestra practice soon anyway, so I'll have just enough time before that starts.

"Oh yeah, you still need to play your Bassoon for me," she says excitedly.

"Cello," I correct her.

"Oops. I played trumpet in high school, what do you want from me?" She grins up at me.

"Goof. I've been working on my Sophomore Review solo that I could play for you soon." Each grade level has a "review" where they put us in the performance hall filled with the friends of family of all the music majors and minors in that grade and all of the music professors. You perform a solo for everyone and receive a grade from the professors, which is what we do for our midterm and final every semester. I've gotten through four of them so far so they're getting easier, but I've never been a strong soloist so it's always nerve-wracking.

"I'd like that." She bumps into me intentionally and we keep walking to the dining hall.

Rey's POV

We spend the weekend switching between working on homework at my dorm, his apartment, or in the cantina cafe attached to the library. I personally prefer working in more secluded locations but I find him far too distracting for that to be productive so we end up in the Cantina quite frequently.

Sunday night, during what he keeps referring to as the golden hour, he takes me out to a local park to help me with the photography assignment. We're working on macro photography which means we have to set the aperture and exposure just right to have clear photos up close. I try to follow the instruction sheet that Maz provided but I end up just frustrated. Ben comes over and sits by me, and explains how to do it in a gentle voice knowing I'm frustrated. I watch as he sets his camera and then I replicate the action on mine until my camera is ready to go.

"Better?" He asks me after I've been snapping away with photos for a while.

"Much," I say, my face still pressed against the camera taking a photo.

"You know, I thought I was the one with a temper."

I pull the camera down and look at him. "Which is weird because I haven't seen it. I've been the one storming away from you and getting upset."

"That is true. You're a little hothead." He walks up to me and pulls me into his arms, looping his hands behind my waist. "My little hothead."

"Excuse me, but I'm not that little." I retort.

He raises his eyebrow and smirks at me putting his hand up by his forehead and then lowering it to the top of my head. "Yeah okay." He says and I stick my tongue out him. "But if you weren't little, I wouldn't be able to do this!" He swoops down and picks me up at the waist, throwing me over his shoulder. He runs down the grassy path and towards the pond acting like he's going to throw me in.

"Ben no!" I squeal as he mocks tossing me towards the water and then sets me on the ground. "You're the worst!" I hit his chest and he leans down to kiss me, pulling me to him with one arm, the other hanging by his side holding his camera.

"Oh hello, Ben." We hear a voice and turn around. Dr.Williams is walking out from one of the hiking paths with a woman I suppose is his wife. "Oh." He pauses as he sees me. "Hello, Rey." I feel my cheeks go white at the realization that we've been caught.

"Hi Dr.Williams, how are you?" Ben releases me and runs his hand down the back of his neck as he steps away.

"Just out for a Sunday hike," he says with a polite smile as always. "What are you two doing?"

"Working on a photography assignment for Professor Maz's class," I speak up. "We're working on macro photography."

"Ah, beautiful type of photography. One of our favorites." He looks at his wife. "Well, we're going to continue on our walk. Stay out of trouble you two."

We say our goodbyes and watch them walk away.

"Shit," Ben mumbles under his breath and starts walking towards the parking lot as soon as Dr. Williams is out of sight.

"What do we do?" I run to catch up with him.

"There's really nothing we can do. I'm breaking a clearly lined out rule in the mentor handbook." We get into the Jeep and he looks at me. "I'm going to have to tell my mom tomorrow. Let's just go back and relax and I can think about what I'm going to say."

Ben's POV

I wake up the next morning to my alarm at 9. Rey is nestled up against me as the little spoon, her back rising and falling against my chest and stomach. I roll backward and reach for my phone, my other arm still pinned underneath her. I squint at the bright light of the phone and see an email from Dr.Williams as soon as the alarm screen disappears.

"Damn it," I whisper at my phone and she lifts her head towards me.

"What?" She says groggily.

"Dr.Williams wants me to report to his office at 11 before class."

"Does he say what he wants to meet about?" She yawns.

"I'm sure it has to do with last night."

"Oh yeah." she rolls over curls back up into me, this time facing me.

"Rey," I say wrapping my arms around her and kissing the top of her head. "Whatever happens, we're going to be okay."

"Ok good." She mumbles into my chest as she drifts back off.

"I think I'm going to go practice a bit. That usually helps me clear my mind." I roll her away and start getting up. "I'll set your alarm for 10, you can just stay here." I pull the black comforter up and tuck it around her shoulders. She tips her head up without opening her eyes and I lean down to give her lips a peck. I sit on the edge of the bed and look at her for a second, running my hands across her hair. She's so perfect and I know that I'm falling in love with this girl. I just don't want to say it too soon and scare her.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

By the time I get ready and get to the music building I have time to spend a little over an hour practicing my solo piece for the review. I find it hard to focus because I'm very nervous about what Dr.Williams is going to say. Has he already reported me and told my mother?

I pack up my cello and make my way to his office. The door is cracked open and I knock lightly as I push it open, finding Dr.Williams sitting at his desk, reading through a piece of music, and humming to himself.

"Ah Ben, come in. Please shut the door." I do as he says and takes a seat in one of the red chairs in front of his desk, waiting quietly as he packs up his music score.

"I'm sure you probably know why I called you in," he starts and I nod. "You know this is a direct violation of the mentor handbook I assume?"

"Yes sir."

He sits back in his desk chair and studies me for a second. "Tell me about this relationship you have with Rey."

"She's the most amazing girl I've ever met Sir."

"How did this start?"

"I really don't know exactly how it started, her roommate is my roommate's girlfriend so we met outside of class through them."

"So the attraction didn't start in class?"

"Honestly?" I pause and think if it's smart to say. "It started the moment I saw her in the hallway upstairs, so no, not in class."

"Did you act on it while you were performing your duties as a mentor?" He asks while shifting in his seat, his eyes trained on me.

"No, I didn't. Our acting on our attraction all occurred outside of my duties as a mentor."

"That's good and makes things a little better, but it still doesn't excuse it."

"I know." I stare at my hands for a moment before continuing. "I tried to stay away from her and I failed in just a few days. She has something about her that I'm just unexplainably drawn to."

He smirks and I watch his eyes as he looks at a photo frame of him and his wife before responding. "Forgive me if I'm overstepping, but do you love her?"

"I've only known her for two weeks," I reason.

"That isn't what I asked Ben."

I look at him for a second before answering. "Yes. I love her."

He sits forward in his seat and rests his elbows on the desk. "Then I say screw the rules."

"But..."

"No. Here's the deal Ben, when you find an amazing woman that makes you feel that way, you don't walk away from her. You hold on for everything you're worth and pray she does the same." He pauses and thinks for a moment. "If you promise to keep this secret and make sure no one else finds out, I won't say a word."

"Thank you," I say completely shocked.

"But." Uh oh, I gulp involuntarily as he says that. "If someone else finds out and reports this and your mother asks me if I know about it, I will not lie to her. I respect her too much to do that. You understand?"

I nod in agreement.

"Good. Thank you for coming to talk to me, Ben."

Rey's POV

I meet Rose, Finn, And Poe for lunch before class but I'm only able to pick at my food because I'm so nervous. They all watch me with a skeptical look, trying to decide if they should say anything.

"Okay, what's up with you?" Finn finally asks.

"Nothing," I lie.

"You're a shit liar Rey. Always have been." Poe states.

"Is it Kylo?" Rose asks softly.

"Kind of." I look up at them. "Dr.Williams caught us yesterday. We were at the park taking photos for class and we kissed at one point. Of course, Dr.Williams came around the corner right at that moment."

"Who's Dr.William's?" Poe whispers to Finn.

"Our freshman seminar professor. Ren is our student mentor," Finn says, his cheek bulged out as he talks with food in his mouth.

Poe laughs "oh that is so not good."

I just stare at him and Rose scolds him. "Poe. Not the reaction she wants right now."

"Anyways," I continue "Ben got called into a meeting this morning with him. Actually he should be in it right now. I have no idea what he's going to say and I'm nervous."

"To be fair you two are pretty bad at hiding it," Finn says with a still full mouth. 'What's with this kid eating as if his life depends on it, he's going to choke.'

"Seriously?" Rose smacks him on the back of the head. "You two are idiots." She picks up her tray. "Rey, let's go walk."

I walk with Rose to scrape our trays off and we walk out to the main campus. The air is starting to cool off as we move into the fall and I wrap my jacket around me.

We walk in silence for the most part but her presence alone is enough to settle my nerves a little. She agrees to go with me to the classroom early to see if Ben is there yet but much to my disappointment, it's still empty. I watch the clock as each minute clicks away leading up to noon but Ben still isn't here. Dr.Williams walks in two minutes before class and starts setting up at the front but Ben isn't with him.

As the clock clicks to twelve, Ben walks in and I let out a sigh of relief and glance at Rose. I watch him walk across the front, but he doesn't look at me. He and Dr.Willaims nod at each other in greeting and he takes his seat. I continue to keep an eye on him as he gets settled and his eyes flick up to mine. I give him a questioning look but he just drops his eyes immediately and gets out his notebook, keeping a completely straight face. What did Dr. Willaims say to him?

I tap my pencil throughout the lecture due to my nervous energy until I feel my phone buzz and I pull it out.

Ben: I can hear your pencil all the way over here. Stop it. We're okay I promise.

Rey: okay sorry

Ben: I'll meet you at your dorm later. We need to lay off for a bit in public

I feel my heart sink a little and put my phone away after texting back "ok."

I return to my dorm immediately after class and sit anxiously on the futon waiting for him. I nearly run to the door as soon as he knocks and I let him in. He closes the door behind him and locks it and I pull him to me and wrap my arms around him. He kisses the top of my head and takes a deep breath.

"It's okay. I promise," he says quietly, stroking my hair.

"What happened?" I lean back in his arms and look at him.

"Let's sit, I haven't had food yet and I'm kind of lightheaded." I follow him to the futon and sit down. "So it was a long conversation but what it boils down to is he wants us to cool off in public. Like no touching, flirting, anything like that until the semester is over. He isn't going to tell anyone about it either."

"Really? How'd you manage that?"

"He asked me how I feel about you."His eyes lock with mine and I feel butterflies kick up in my stomach.

"And?"

"It's a secret," he teases and leans in to kiss me lightly. "He did warn me though that if someone else reported us and he was asked about it, He wouldn't be able to lie about it. Especially not to my mom."

"So that's why you said we need to cool off."

"Exactly," he sighs deeply. "But when we're private, you're all mine." He kisses me softly and I put my arms around his neck.

"Good." I smile inches from his lips and I pull him back onto the futon.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

We've been laying on this futon for close to an hour now and Rey keeps dozing off on my chest. I lay on my back with one hand behind my head studying the room and it's contents, listening to her slow and steady breathing.

"Rey?" I say quietly and she murmurs back. "I don't want to be insensitive, but is that all the clothes you have? I don't see any cold-weather clothes."

"No, it's not. But the rest of them are at the Unkars and I haven't wanted to go back there since I left suddenly after graduation. Honestly, I don't even know if my stuff will still even be there."

"You want me to take you?" I ask while drawing circles on her arm with my finger.

"You don't have to," she says. "I'm sure Poe would be willing to take me there."

"I really don't mind. Plus it's kind of my job."

"What do you mean 'it's your job'?" She laughs.

"Well, to help my girlfriend out when she needs it."

She sits up fast and looks at me while resting on one elbow. "Ben Solo, is this your way of asking me to be your girlfriend?"

"Well yeah, I guess that's what I was going for." I grin at her.

"I'll have to think about it." She lays back down on my chest and stares at the ceiling. "Yeah, I think that sounds good."

"You're such a goof," I say kissing the top of her head and hugging her. "I haven't eaten today still, can we go get food then we can go get your stuff?"

"Let's do it," she says and I pull her up from the couch with me.

The entire way to the Unkars I can tell Rey is nervous. She keeps switching between picking at the holes on her jeans, biting her nails, and drumming her fingers on the center console. I reach over to her and set my hand on her leg when she starts to bounce it and she grips my hand rather hard showing me just how tense she is.

"It's been three months since I was there." She says as we pull down her street. "I never told them I was leaving, I just up and left. I don't know how they're going to react."

"You need to tell me now, is there any reason we will be in danger?" I say in a serious tone.

"Honestly I have no idea. I know Mr.Unkar has a gun, and he likes to threaten trespassers with it."

"Will he see us as trespassers?"

"I don't know. I guess if he's angry about me leaving, then maybe." She shrugs, pulling at a hole on her pants.

"Great," I say sarcastically and pull off to the side of the road before we're in front of the house. I open up the center console and dig to the bottom pulling out a black case.

"What is that?"

"Our protection in case he threatens the "trespassers" as you said," I respond pulling out my handgun and loading it in a swift motion. I lean forward from the seat and stick it in my waistband, covering it with my shirt and pull away from the curb again.

"I didn't know you had that." She says shocked.

"And pretend you don't. I have my concealed carry so it's legal, but I don't like people knowing it's there."

We pull in front of the house with the broken down maroon car. All of the windows are open along with the front door. A large man with orange hair is sitting in the front window on a recliner watching tv, he sees us and stands up.

"Oh joy," she says hopping out of the car.

"Rey." The large man is standing on the front step with the shotgun she mentioned in one hand. "Nice of you to grace us with your presence again."

"Hi, Mr.Unkar. I'm here to get my stuff." She says flatly walking towards the front porch.

"Who's that?" He asks, ignoring her and motioning at me with the hand holding the gun. The hair on the back of my neck stands up and I take a couple of steps around the running vehicle and lean on it.

"My boyfriend. Can I get my stuff?" She asks again.

"Pretty snazzy car you got there boy. Lots of money put into all of those upgrades. How much money do you got stuck into that?"

"Enough," I say with my arms crossed and he nods a little.

"Smart girl." He turns back to Rey who is standing at the base of the porch stairs. "Go to college, find yourself some rich boy to sink your claws into. You know she's only with you for money right?" He yells the last part to me.

"I doubt that but thanks," I say flatly.

"Unkar!" Rey yells. "My stuff?" An equally large woman comes out of the house.

"Don't you talk to your father like that." The lady yells and looks at me. "What are you looking at boy?" She says to me and I don't respond.

"Sorry," Rey says squinting up at them in the sun and the man scoffs. "Can I just come in and grab my stuff, please? I'll be on my way and you never have to see me again."

"Fine," the lady says and grunts. "They're in the garage. Don't come inside."

"Thank you," Rey says and motions for me to follow. The lady walks inside but the man stays where he is and watches me walk across the yard to meet her. She lugs open the garage door and a wretched smell hits me. I can't tell if it's garbage or if something died, but it's bad.

The man walks up next to me. "Over there." He points into the corner at 7 boxes stacked precariously. It looks as though the three on the bottom got wet by the lines on the side. "Bet you didn't know she was from such a dump."

"I don't care where she's from."

"Good on you." He slaps my back and a couple of his fingers hit the handle of the gun. "What's that you got there."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I say walking away to help Rey with the boxes without making eye contact. We both grab two and walk to the Jeep.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." He yells at me as we walk across the small yard and Rey and I make eye contact out of the corner of our eyes. We throw the boxes in the back and head back to the garage.

"Don't ignore me, boy."

"I'm not ignoring you. I simply don't know what you're talking about." I say with a guarded tone.

She grabs the two small boxes left and I grab the large one, Unkar is still waddling around behind me, glaring at me.

"Don't lie to me either." I can sense him getting agitated and I stop to close the garage door behind me.

"I'm not."

"Yes. Yes, you are. Not only is it disrespectful to come onto someone's property and lie and ignore them, but you carry a gun on here too." I make it halfway up the driveway before he snaps, "Stop ignoring me." He yells and points his gun at me.

I look at Rey who has just put her two boxes in the back and looks at me over the open jeep, her eyes are huge. I put my free hand up and turn to him, and bend over slowly to set the box down, making sure that I don't break eye contact.

"Mr. Unkar," I say calmly.

"No. I'm done with you." He says. "Rey, Get the box while I deal with him."

She moves over quickly and grabs the box. She pauses before going back to the jeep, setting it in, and closing the back door.

"Mr. Unkar, stop it," Rey says as she walks back toward us with her hands up.

"Rey, stop," I say calmly. I watch his eyes flick between us as she gets closer.

"Mr. Unkar this isn't you," she says again, his eyes flick to her and stay long enough for me to pull my gun out and point it at him. I hold it had eye level, one hand wrapped around it, the other supporting it from the bottom.

"Ahhhh there it is." He says with a laugh turning back to me. "Give it up boy, you have more to lose than me."

"Do I though?" I say calling his bluff. "Rey, go back to the car," I say in a low voice. She doesn't move. "Now," I say with more authority.

She backs up slowly and gets into the Jeep.

"Mr. Unkar why are you doing this?" I say as I take a step back.

"You lied to me," he says as I take another step back. I guess that I'm about ten feet from my car door at this point.

"Just let me go, and you never have to see her or me again." I take a step.

"Stop moving." He moves his finger to the trigger and I freeze and look at him for a second. He's untrained, I can tell by how he's holding the gun, how he's clearly shaking, and how his eyes keep flicking around everywhere. It won't be hard to break his concentration. I take a deep breath and look at Rey out of the corner of my eye, her face is white. In one fluid motion, I point the gun at the grass next to his feet and pull the trigger. A crack echoes through the neighborhood and Rey screams. Unkar being thrown off by the shock gives me enough time to turn and run back to my Jeep that I left running. I grab the frame and swing myself through the space where the door usually is and throw the Jeep into drive.

"Duck!" I yell at her and speed down the road. A crack rips through the neighborhood again and I duck down, looking over the dash a little as something hits the back of my Jeep.

Adrenaline causes me to blackout and the next thing I remember is pulling into my parent's driveway. I park the jeep and look over at Rey who is staring at the dash with an expressionless face obviously in shock. I get out of the jeep and walk to the other side, reach over her, unbuckle her seatbelt, and pull her out of the seat. As I wrap her in my arms I feel her shake and she begins to cry as she wraps her arms around me. Once I feel like she has calmed down enough, I release her and walk to the other side of the jeep to discharge the gun.

I hear the side door open and my parents are both there. "What the hell happened?" My dad's voice cuts across the driveway. "And why do you have your gun out?"

My mom rushes over to Rey. "Sweety come here." She wraps Rey in her arms.

"Ben." My dad walks towards me. "Speak."

"Mr.Solo, it's my fault. We went to get my stuff from my foster parents and my foster dad pulled a gun on him." Rey says and my mom looks at me in shock.

My dad stares at me for a second not sure what to say. "Lets all just go inside and have a drink. Me, not you." He clarifies and walks inside.

I put the gun in the case and put it back in the console while my mom ushers Rey inside with her. I sigh and walk to the back of my Jeep to assess the damage and find a bullet hole in the bumper. Nothing I can do about it now, I think to myself and follow them all inside.

Chapter Text

Reys POV

Leia made me tea and then had me sit with her in the living room. She asked me all sorts of questions about my general safety growing up and my childhood in general. I could tell she genuinely cared and when I started to cry, she pulled me to her, and let me cry. I never had a mother and it was nice to feel like I had something close to it for a moment.

After a while, Ben and Han come back to the living room after talking in Hans's office. I'm assuming they were talking about what happened but neither of them tells us.

"Rey, Ben will take you home if you're ready?" Han says leaning against the door frame.

"Okay," I say sitting up and wiping my eyes. Leia runs her hand up and down my back as I get up.

Ben moves to his mom as I walk towards the door. "Sorry for interrupting your night. I didn't know where to go and this was the closest safe place I could think of."

"Don't be sorry. I'm just glad you two are safe." She hugs him. "Get her home and get some sleep okay?"

Ben comes over by me and the two of us head out to the jeep together and get in. We drive in silence back to the campus, but he doesn't let go of my hand the whole way.

"Do you want to sleep alone tonight?" He asks as we get close to campus.

"No, actually the opposite. Can I stay with you?"

"Of course." He turns towards his house and I thank him.

Ben's POV

When we get to the house, I help her dig through her boxes while she looks for a change of clothes, and we head inside. She has no interest in watching a movie or playing games and Hux isn't home, so we head straight up to my room. I give her an extra towel and she heads to the bathroom to take a shower while I sit in my room and reflect on the craziness of the last 24 hours.

I hear the bathroom door after her shower and she walks back in wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt, her wet hair leaving watermarks on her sweatshirt. She already looks happier and more relaxed.

"How are you feeling?" I ask her, laying back on my bed with my hands behind my head.

"Much better," she smiles and looks up at me as she brushes her hair out. "I needed to wash today off of me and just take a moment alone."

"Good." I watch her silently and she smiles at me. It's crazy to think, but in just under two weeks, this girl who I had no idea existed has become my whole world.

"Ben?" She says as she crawls up next to me and sits pretzel style facing me. "Thank you. I've never had anyone do anything remotely close to what you did today."

"You mean you don't make a habit of getting your boyfriends into gun stand-offs?"

She laughs and lays on top of me resting her head on my chest. I wrap my arms around her and I hear her sigh from contentment.

"We should get some sleep," I whisper.

"Yeah." She says softly back. She sits up and kisses me before we crawl under the covers and shut the light off. For the first time since we started staying overnight together, she backs up to me and I wrap myself around her and we go to sleep without making out or fooling around. Tonight, we're just more concerned about being there with each other and relaxing, it's not about only the physical anymore.

--

Morning rolls around and with the lack of responsibilities this Saturday I just let her keep sleeping. We're in the same position we were in when we fell asleep and I can feel her breathing as her back raises and falls. She's so tiny in my arms, and I can't seem to get close enough to her right now.

I run my hand under her shirt and rest my hand on her stomach while trailing kisses up her arm and then up her neck. She stirs and grumbles "Hi trouble," As she wraps her top hand up and around the back of my neck, still facing away from me in the little spoon position.

I stop at her ear to nibble on it a little and continue back down her neck as I flex my fingers on her stomach. I feel her back arch a little as my breath hits her neck and her fingers lace themselves into my hair. "Now who's not playing fair," she says as she turns towards me and I roll her on top of me. She straddles me and presses her hips down on mine lightly as she leans down to kiss me. "Well good morning to you too," she laughs while kissing me as she grinds lightly against me.

"Good morning," I chuckle as she kisses down my neck and all the way down to my stomach. "Someone wakes up quickly."

"This is your own fault," she says and meets my lips again. I pull her hips back down to mine and rub against her as she takes in a sharp breath against my mouth.

She rolls to the side, pulling me up against her and I push into her legs with mine and she opens up allowing mine in. I pull her down onto my leg as we continue to kiss, our tongues exploring each other's mouths, and she continues the motion against my leg.

I roll her onto her back and trail kisses all the way down her throat to the space right above her breasts where the shirt stops as she pulls on my hair lightly. I run my hand up the inside of her thigh and she gasps loudly, pulling my head back up to meet hers by my hair. "You're going to make me lose all of my self-control," she whispers.

"I can stop," I whisper close to her face, holding her gaze intently. I can tell by her eyes that that is the last thing she wants.

"I don't want you to, but I think we should," she says in an unconvincing tone.

"Ok." I kiss her again, giving her a few pecks and roll off of her. "I'm going to go take a shower okay?"

Rey's POV

I lay there and watch him leave the room and as soon as he's gone I take a deep breath and stare at the ceiling. Holy cow, I didn't know someone could make me feel like that. I feel for him in literally every part of my body right now.

The shower turns on down the hall and I listen as the shower curtain closes and a mental image of him in the shower pops in my head. The temptation to go in there is consuming me right now, but I try to tell myself that it's just momentary and I'll get over it in a minute. A few more minutes of me laying there pass and I still can't get myself to cool off or shake the mental image of Ben naked in the shower.

Before I know what I'm doing, I get up from the bed and walk to the bathroom. He doesn't seem to hear me enter through the door that he left cracked open almost as an invitation and I close the door as quietly as I can behind me in case Hux comes home. I shimmy out of my clothes and leave them next to his in a pile on the floor. Grabbing the edge of the shower curtain, I take a deep breath before sneaking in behind him as he washes the soap off of his face so he still doesn't notice me. I'm intrigued as I watch the muscles bulge and relax as he washes his face and the water trails down the lines between them on his back.

I wrap my hands around his stomach and I feel him tense for a moment and then rush to finish washing the soap off of his face. He grabs my hands as he backs up from the water a little and I rest my head on his back. "Rey," he whispers and I smile, my cheek pressed against his shoulder blade. We stand there for a moment under the water, until I flex my hand on his abs which breaks him out of the trance. He turns around and pushes me up against the wall opposite the curtain by my hips and kisses me gently.

I pull him against me and I can feel him getting hard up against my hip bone as the kisses become hungrier. I run my hands through his wet hair and his breath continues to become more and more rapid until he picks me up and pushes me against the cold wall, the warm water pouring over us from the side. A moment later, he sets me down again and as my feet hit the shower floor he looks back at me, his eyes are on fire.

"We don't have to do this if you're not ready."

"Let's take some baby steps," I whisper as I pull him closer to my lips. "Nothing wrong with a little exploring."

"Tell me if I cross a line," he says as he pushes me back against the wall and trails kisses hungrily down the length of my body pausing as he gets to my waist. He places one hand on my hip and the other runs up the inside of my leg starting at my ankle as he stands up slowly. The closer his head gets to mine, the further up my leg his hand moves, and the more the shivers intensify. He gets back to my face and kisses me as one finger runs between my legs and I let out a small moan.

"What do you want?" He whispers into my ear as he holds his finger between my legs and pins me to the wall with the other hand. He knows he has me in a vulnerable position as his finger pushes against a tender spot and I twitch involuntarily. "Rey. What do you want?" He whispers again, this time looking directly into my eyes with an intensely hungry expression.

"I want this" I whisper back and he kisses me.

Ben's POV

We stay in the shower fooling around until we are both satisfied and then we finish showering by soaping each other up and rinsing off. Right as I reach to turn the water off, I hear boots outside the bathroom and the door opens.

"Jeeze, Ren, you been in here long enough? Gwen needs to pee," Hux says and Rey puts her finger to her lips. "Also, have you seen Rey, Gwen said she never came home last night."

"Yeah, actually I have." I look at her, as she's shaking her head frantically in an attempt to tell me to not let him know she's here. "She's right here actually." She silently laughs and gives me a playful shove.

"Oh." He pauses for a second. "Oh Shit. I'm sorry. I'm going," he says frantically and I hear the door click.

We turn the water off and hop out quickly, Rey bright red from the hot water and from just getting caught.

"That's so embarrassing," she whispers.

"Do you know how many times I've caught those two?" I whisper back, watching her naked body as she dries off. "Welcome to the house. You have passed the first stage of initiation."

She smacks me playfully again and wraps herself in a towel before I check both ways in the upstairs hallway and motion for her to follow me. She darts in front of me and as I get to the door I yell "Gwen, the bathroom is open." I close the door and lock it behind me quickly before she gets up the stairs.

"Rey, we have a lot to talk about later," Gwen yells through my door and I hear the bathroom door click shut a second later.

I turn towards her standing behind me and she laughs. "Oh my God." She wraps her arms around me still laughing and I lean forward to kiss her. She kisses me back, keeping her hands wrapped around me, and leans into the kiss. I grab behind her thighs and pick her up so she's wrapped around me like a Koala and turn to press her against the wall.

"Someone not done?" I say leaning back to look at her, her towel wrapped body still clingy to me.

"We should get dressed," she protests.

"You don't mean that," I say raising an eyebrow and grinning.

"Oh, and how do you know?" She challenges and I see the fire ignite in her eyes again.

"Because I'm not done with you either," I say as I turn around and throw her onto the bed. I pull her down so her butt is on the edge of the bed and she lies back looking at me with an amused expression. I start at her ankle and run slow kisses up her leg as she giggles about it tickling but I can see her getting wound up tighter at the same time. Finally, I reach between her legs and enter with my tongue, and out of the corner of my eye, I see her reach frantically and grab the sheets with a gasp.

Chapter Text

Ben's POV

The following week flies by as we all prep for homecoming the following week. The art department including the art, theatre, film, and photography students enlist me to help with the decorations for our tailgate and for the float. I refuse to be in the parade but I at least help especially after Rey gives me her puppy dog eyes.

Rey and I fall into a pattern of switching between her staying with me at my house and at her dorm by herself every other night. Gwen protested last weekend after she and Hux caught us that Rey was never at the dorm anymore and she didn't like living alone so Rey made this schedule up for roommate time. Those nights Hux and I usually just sit in the living room playing video games together so it's not like we mind much.

The perks of a small school are that you often have multiple classes with the same people so I get to spend a good chunk of my week with Rey outside of our studio courses on Thursday and my orchestra class. We're getting closer and closer to my sophomore review too so I'm having to spend a growing amount of time in the music hall practice rooms preparing for that.

Friday rolls around and we go to our Biology lab together. Rey is beyond relieved that we aren't doing a dissection but instead are taking advantage of the weather and going out to the nature preserve that the school owns. Our assignment is to collect water samples and label them so next week, we can test them for various minerals and acidity.

"You have got to be kidding me." Rey glares at me holding onto the fishing waders Professor Snoke gave each group when we got off of the bus.

"They don't fit me, there's nothing I can do." I throw my hands up in protest.

"This is not fair," she says and she starts to put them on. "If I get stuck, you're jumping in with your clothes and pulling me out."

"I'll make it up to you later," I whisper in her ear and she blushes. Voi watches from a distance as she waits for her partner to put the waders on, her face hidden under her ridiculous sunglasses again.

"Here we go." I pick Rey up under her arms and set her in the water below. The waders are too stiff and the embankment to the stream is to steep for her to do it on her own gracefully.

She takes her time wandering through the stream to collect samples and then hands them to me. I label them and place them in the carrier hanging from my shoulder. When we're halfway done, she comes to the edge and I pull her back out by her arms and we move to the other stream.

Rey tries to climb back down into this stream and her feet immediately get sucked in by mud so she is unable to move. She moves frantically and looks up at me with a panicked expression after trying unsuccessfully to move.

"I'm stuck," Rey says, her eyes huge.

"I see that," I laugh. "Are you claustrophobic?"

"Uh yes, now let me out!" Shes says in a higher pitch. I grab under her arms and pull but the suction from the mud is too strong and she panics from the failed attempt.

"Ok Rey," I say squatting down to her eye level as she stands in the lowered mud bit. I can reach her shoulders and I look in her eyes. "I need you to calm down and take deep breaths." She does as I say and follows suit matching my breaths. "Good, now unbuckle the waders." She raises her eyebrows but does as I say again. I stand up and pull up on her again, this time slipping her out of the waders. I set her on the ground and lean back over to grab the waders. With a tug, they release, mud coats them all the way up to the knees.

"Jeeze you were really in there," I state and laugh at her. We finish grabbing the samples by walking along with the steam and bending down over the edge. A few of them I have to stabilize her but I think she's just happy she isn't having to get back into the water.

At the end of the lab, I get on the bus to grab a seat while Rey hands the samples to Professor Snoke to store until next week. I wait patiently and watch as Voi gets on the bus before Rey and sits down right next to me.

"Can I sit here?" She chirps.

"Ya know, you always ask after you're already seated so it really doesn't matter what I say."

"Oh, Ben," she laughs.

"It's Kylo," I mumble out the window. "Or even easier Ren. It's only one letter difference." As always she doesn't respond to me about it.

Rey gets on and looks at us, her face dropping when she sees Voi. She walks past our row and sits down with Voi's lab partner and I see Voi looking at me out of the corner of her eye. I pull out my phone and text Rey.

Ben: Sorry, she took the seat without asking.

Rey: it's okay, she does that. Just a 20-minute ride. Besides, it would be more suspicious if we threw a fit over it.

Ben: lunch on me after this? You pick.

Rey: sounds good :)

I shove my phone back in my pocket as the bus pulls away from the nature preserve. Voi talks my ear of the entire way home about her roommates and their drama and I just tune her out. As we pull up to campus she turns to me.

"Want to grab lunch?" She asks with an excited look?

"Sorry I have plans," I say and try to stand up.

"With your girlfriend?"

"I don't have a girlfriend." I try to get her to back up out of the seat but she doesn't move.

"Then who are your plans with," she asks holding her ground.

"Doesn't matter Voi." Rey walks behind her and exits the bus.

"Kind of does if you're still breaking rules and secretly seeing her."

"We aren't," I say looking at my watch. "Not that it's any of your business. Please move."

"No." She puts her arms on the two seatbacks on each side of us completely trapping me. "Have lunch with me." My watch buzzes with a Text from Rey and I look at it.

Rey: meet you at the jeep when you're done dealing with crazy

"Fine," I say and I climb over the seat in front of me and past her. She scrambles to get in front of me but my legs are longer and I win.

Voi runs after me off the bus protesting and trying to get me to stay but I walk faster than her. "Voi!" I yell. "Back off. You and I will never be together. I'm not interested."

A few groups of people setting up for next week's homecoming activities look at us and laugh and Voi looks at them out of embarrassment. I stand my ground and just look at her with a challenging expression.

"Ben stop," she says and crosses her arms.

"No. You stop." I turn and continue through the parking lot to my Jeep where Rey hides behind by the back tire. Voi walks away and when she's out of sight, Rey gets in the jeep with me.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV.

Homecoming week is filled with fun activities across the campus such as the Powderpuff football game, cardboard boat races, grade Olympics, pep rally and football game to name a few. Gwen and I sit on the floor of the living room at the guy's house mapping out what we will and won't be attending Sunday evening as they play their video game. Both of them insist that they will not be going to many of the activities with us and we concede on a good majority of them.

"Ok, these are the ones you don't have to come to, but these are the ones you do," Gwen says to Hux but he ignores her. She gets up and clicks the tv off which causes both Ben and Hux to start protesting and yelling at her. "Did you hear me?" She says to Hux and Ben looks at me and rolls his eyes.

"Yes, Gwen I heard you," Hux snaps at her.

"No Dominic, you didn't," Gwen snaps back and Ben widens his eyes at me as I sit down next to him on the couch. Gwen never uses Hux's first name so we've learned that when she does, she is legitimately upset about something. Ben turns to me and we block out their arguing with our hushed conversation.

"Okay, what do you want me to come with you to?" He asks me with the sweetest expression on his face.

"I mean you don't have to," I start and he interrupts.

"No, don't do that. Just tell me what you want me to come to."

"I was thinking just the festival and the tailgate. If that's okay?" I ask sheepishly.

"That's perfect." He leans in and kisses me.

"See look, they're getting along Gwen. Why can't we be like them!" Hux yells.

"Because that's puppy love, Dominic. We passed that point two years ago. Now we're just an old married couple."

"I don't like it when Mom and Dad fight," Ben says laughing and winking at me.

"You shut up," Hux orders at him.

"On that note." Ben slaps his hands on his knees and stands up. "I think we're going to go to bed."

"Night guys," I say as we leave the room and they both mumble back mid-argument.

"That was rough," I marvel as we walk into Bens' room and I flop on the bed.

"Eh, it happens sometimes." Ben shrugs as he takes his jeans off and puts sweatpants on. "They've been together long enough that occasionally they try to kill each other to keep the spark alive." He crawls up the bed next to me where I lay on my side looking at my phone. "But with you, I don't need anything to help me keep the spark alive." He wraps his arms around me, rolling me over him and nuzzling my neck.

"Ben!" I yell as he flips me over so I'm under him and he starts to tickle me. "I'm going to pee!" I yell in protest. He squeezes my hips with his knees and locks his legs over mine as he leans forward and pins my wrists next to my head. "Oh okay, that works too," I mumble.

"Yeah?" He says with a playful tone.

"What are you up to trouble?" I ask.

"Oh, nothing," he says as he leans down and kisses my neck, still completely immobilizing me.

"I'm on my period," I whisper to him and he keeps kissing me.

"So? I can still kiss you," he says as he moves to my chest and kisses the dip of my shirt between my breasts.

"True," I concede as he releases me and I wrap myself around him.

Bens POV

Homecoming week flies by quickly, and I spend most of my time sitting in the musty music practice rooms practicing while Gwen and Rey spend most of their free time running between the different homecoming events. It's already nearing the end of September meaning I'm a month out from my Sophomore review, and I really don't feel ready for it at all.

Saturday morning we're rudely woken up by Gwen as she opens my bedroom door and leaps onto Rey and I. "Time to PARTAYYYY" She says as she jumps up and down on my bed.

"What the hell Gwen?" I grumble as I pull the covers over Rey's and my head.

"What time is it anyway?" Rey mumbles as she rolls to face me and I wrap my arms around her, ignoring Gwen still jumping on the bed above us.

"9 am, time to get this party going." Gwen takes one more leap and jumps to the floor. "I'm coming back in 30 minutes and if you two aren't out of this bed, we're going to have an issue." I hear the door click behind her and peak over the covers to make sure we're alone. Gwen spent a lot of time here last year for different events so she got half of the college experience already which I almost think makes her worse in these situations.

"Morning sleepy," I mumble into Rey's head. I can feel her warm breath on my bare chest.

"Noooo," Rey groans.

"You really aren't a morning person are you?"

"Not at all," she grumbles into my chest.

"Let me help with that," I say as I roll her backward so I'm on top of her, one of her legs on either side of me.

"I was comfortable," She wines with her eyes still shut.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I was just trying to help," I say as I run little kisses along her collarbone. She giggles and wiggles beneath me a little as I move to her neck and run my hands up the back of her legs to her butt. "I love this," I say as I squeeze her butt a little.

"Yeah?" She grins at me and I kiss her softly, bringing my hands back up to stabilize myself. The kisses intensify as she wraps her legs up and around me and pulls me down to her, I feel myself rubbing up against her pelvis and she moves against me lightly in response.

"Should I lock the door?" I whisper into her ear.

"Probably. But I'll do it." She kisses me and sneaks out from under me and I lay back down on my back and watch her. Her hair is in a messy bun that is falling off the back of her head, she wears a light lined sports bra that doesn't support her much and short little pajama shorts. 'I love waking up to this sexy little thing.'

She pushes on the door to make sure it's latched and clicks the lock over, then turns back to me, blushing a little at the eye contact and walks to the foot of the bed. I watch with curiosity, my hands supporting my head from the back as she pulls the sheets out from the bottom of the mattress and crawls up between my legs. I watch the bulge of her head move closer to me under the blanket and stop as I feel her fingers grab the top of my boxers and pull them down. Every part of my body tingles as she takes her hands and slowly runs them back up my legs and tense as she takes all of me in her mouth and my eyes close involuntarily.

Rey's POV

We've been laying here for a while now, wrapped up in each other's arms, our skin hot and sticky. Ben's head rests right above my bare breasts and I run my hands aimlessly through his hair, lightly scratching his head. I feel at home here, in his arms. I have never had a feeling of comfort quite this strong in my life and I don't ever want to lose it. At this moment, I know that I love Ben. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I do, which scares me because we've known each other for a little over three weeks.

I'm broken out of my trance by a loud bang on the door. "All right you two let's go!" Gwen yells through the door. Ben looks up at me and we both silently laugh. "Hello???" Gwen yells again.

"You know she isn't going to go away right?" I whisper.

"Yeah, I know," Ben groans and we unwrap to get out of bed. I throw on one of his shirts and my underwear so I can go shower, waiting for him to put on his boxers before opening the door. I open the door and I'm greeted by Gwen holding three shot glasses, her grin reaches clear across her face and her eyes scan quickly up and down my disheveled appearance.

"I am not doing one of those," I say adamantly.

"Oh yes, you are. You owe me since you didn't get up to get ready and instead stayed in bed to fool around," she retorts and I glare at her. "Here." She hands one to me and one to Ben who has joined me in the doorframe. "Cheers!" She aggressively links her glass into mine before throwing the drink back and I grudgingly follow suit.

"Give me 20 minutes okay?" I say and she heads back downstairs.

Once we're all ready, we all head over to the giant parking lot where the tailgates are for the football game. We have Hux and Gwen come with us to the art department tailgate, where we meet up with Rose, Finn, and Poe again. Staying away from Ben proves harder than I thought but the constant eyes of Dr.Williams and Voi on us acts as a weird type of motivator to keep our secret.

Gwen pulls us around as the day continues to all of the different tailgates and parties she can find until we are absolutely exhausted. Ben and I finally fall back into bed at 2 am after bar close and don't even bother to brush our teeth out of pure exhaustion.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

Rey stayed at her dorm last night so I wake up in my bed alone. Class doesn't start until noon on Monday's so I know I have a little time to practice for the review again before I meet Rey and her friends for lunch. I grab my phone to look at the text message that was ultimately the reason I woke up.

Mom: I need to talk to you. Meet me at my office at 10.

I look at the clock that reads 9:45 and bolt up because I don't have much time to get ready and get there. I quickly wash my hair in the sink and throw on my clothes and opt to take my motorcycle because parking at my mom's office is impossible and she hates when I'm late.

I run up the stairs right as I hear the clock on main lawn chiming signaling that it's ten. As I reach her office door, I go to silence my phone but find my pocket empty. I must have left it at home accidentally.

I push her office door open quickly and immediately start apologizing for being late but am stopped in my tracks when I see Rey sitting there. She looks up at me and then immediately at the floor.

"Ben, sit down," my mom says and I know by the tone she's upset so I do as she says. I look over at Rey, but she continues to just stare at the ground with her hands clasped on her lap. "You two want to tell me anything?" My mom breaks the silence.

"No," I say looking at her and she stares back at me for a minute.

"Fine," she snaps after a long pause and takes a breath. "It has been brought to my attention by a student that the student mentor for their freshman seminar is sleeping with one of the other students in the class. Do you two know anything about this?" She stares at the two of us and when neither of us responds she adds to it. "I asked the Professor of the class and he confirmed it already. "

"Dr.Organa I'm so sorry," Rey says looking up at my mom and apologizing.

"Rey, I'm not angry with you, disappointed, but not angry. Ben, you know better," she says sharply.

"Mom, you knew about this relationship," I protest.

"I did not know she was your mentee," she says calmly. "You will not embarrass me in front of my colleagues again Benjamin."

"You can't just tell us to stay away from each other," I argue.

"That is exactly what I'm doing. I am the president of the school and a student mentor who is my son stepping down because he can't keep it in his pants for one semester is not something I will tolerate. This relationship is over."

"Mom."

"Rey, I'm sorry. You are a lovely girl and I enjoyed getting to know you," my mom directly says to Rey. "I'm going to need to talk to my son alone if you don't mind."

"Yes ma'am," Rey says and leaves the room without looking at me.

As soon as the door latches my mom turns back to me. "Ben, what the hell? Why do you keep doing this to me?"

"Mom, this is different."

"Please tell me how this is different. You had a relationship with your mentor last year and now that you are a mentor, you're having a relationship with a mentee." She sits back in her chair, clearly pissed off.

"Never thought I would be saying this to my mom but here it goes..." I sigh before continuing. "Last year, that thing with Callie was purely physical. We would have sex and leave. No sleeping over, no dates, and absolutely no feelings." She grimaces a little as I say this but I continue. "Rey is different Mom. It's not about sex with her." 'Even though it's taken everything in me not to jump her every second,' I think to myself. "But we have a genuine connection. I've known her four weeks as of today and she is everything to me."

"Ben, it's a direct violation of the rules," she repeats. "Rules that I put in place."

"I love her mom," I say bluntly and my mom stares at me not sure what to say. "I love her and nothing is going to make me stop, not your stupid rules and especially not Voi turning us in."

"You don't know it was Voi."

"Yes, I do," I say confidently and unflinching as we stare each other down.

"It doesn't matter who it was, what matters is what you do about it. Ben, if you love this girl, I can't keep you apart forever but I need you to also respect me and my rules."

"Ok," I say calming down a bit and getting up.

"Ben, please know I want you to be happy," she says.

"Then why are you doing this?"

"There is a precedence that you have to set Ben. Your mother is the President of the College, there are eyes on you, and what you do is a direct reflection of me. Admittedly, it isn't fair to you, but it's the reality."

"You can't keep us apart," I say as I reach the door.

"I know that, but please just think about things."

"Ok," I say as I walk out of the door.

I immediately look around the building to see if Rey is waiting for me but she's nowhere to be found. I run over to her dorm two blocks away and follow someone through the locked entrance. I bang on her door and Gwen answers.

"Ren?" She looks warily at me as I pant from running the entire way. "She's not here."

"Do you know where she is?"

"No. Is everything okay?"

"Frankly no, but I don't have time to talk."

I run back down the stairs and back to my mom's office building to my bike. I need to get my phone.

I pull up quickly to my house and sprint through the doors, scaring Hux who sits on the couch playing video games. My phone is sitting in the middle of my bed with four missed messages on it from Rey.

9:50: Your mom just called me into a meeting with her

9:51: do you know what about?

9:58: Ben?

And the last one which came through after she left the meeting.

Rey: This is wrong and we need to stop. This is goodbye.

My heart sinks and I feel like I want to puke. I grab my head with my hands in disbelief and fall back onto the bed.

Rey didn't come to any of our classes Monday through Wednesday and when I asked Rose and Finn where she was, they said she was sick but wouldn't give me any more information. I stopped by her dorm daily but Gwen said she hadn't seen her and didn't know where she was each time. Every few hours I would text or call her but I never got an answer.

Finally on Thursday, during Film studio, I take a break to walk down the hall and look through the painting studio's window. My breath hitches as I see her for the first time since Monday when we were in my mom's office. Her hair is pulled back in a messy bun, her face looks tired, and she wears leggings with an oversized sweatshirt which I know isn't hers. She doesn't notice me and I don't try to get her attention.

When studio lets out, I head out to the hallway and try to catch her when her class gets out by waiting on the bench. Eventually, she comes out and I stand when she sees me. We stare at each other for a minute and she shifts her backpack on her shoulder.

"Can we talk?" I break the silence. She nods. "Come with me?" She nods again and follows me back to the art library. We sit across from each other as she fiddles with the oversized sleeves.

"Rey, where have you been?" I ask, reading the words on the front of the sweatshirt. 'Canto Lacrosse,' it's Poe's sweatshirt.

"Friend's."

"I asked all of your friends, they haven't seen you," I say and she shrugs. "I miss you."

"We can't do this anymore," she says flatly.

"You can't let my mom get in your head. We just have to make it until after December and then we can go back to normal."

"I'm tired of hiding. I don't want a relationship I have to hide for two more months, I want to be able to go out without looking over my shoulder. I want a normal relationship and so should you."

"Rey please." I look at her but she refuses to look at me.

"No." She shakes her head as tears form in her eyes. "I've cried over this enough. I can't do it."

I watch in disbelief as she gets up and leaves the room without looking back. I'm left sitting there alone with my mouth gaping open, unable to find words.

"I love you," I whisper to the empty room before getting up and heading to the music building.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

I missed lecture this week for Biology but I knew better than to skip lab as well and get on the bad side of Professor Snoke. When I get to the lab, I head for my seat and find Ben and Voi already sitting down at the corner of the table talking.

"Hey, Rey," Voi says with a grin.

"Hi." I take out my binder and put my bag under the desk. "Hi, Ren."

He looks up at me, noticeable hurt in his eyes. "Uh hey," he says and looks at the table.

"Uh oh, trouble in paradise?" Voi jeers and neither of us respond as she laughs to herself.

We work through the lab together, not making eye contact, and only talking as needed for the lab. At the end of the two hours, I rush out to head to lunch with my friends and look back to see Ben walking with Voi towards the parking lot.

*Three weeks later*

It's around 5 pm on Friday night and Gwen is sitting pretzel style on the floor doing her hair and makeup, getting ready to go to a party. I've been sitting in the same position since I got back from my biology lab working on a drawing in my sketchbook while I avoid homework.

"Rey, come on you need to get out and do something," she says as she fills in her eyebrows.

"I do stuff."

"You've been rotating between here, Rose's, and Poe's for three weeks now. They have told me you have done nothing besides sit on the couch mope."

"I'm fine."

She turns and looks at me, only one eye has mascara on it, making her look ridiculous. "Have you talked to him?"

"Outside of for class reasons? No, I haven't."

"I think you should."

"Why?"

"Because he misses you." She turns back to the mirror to finish her other eye. "Whenever I'm over there he just sulks around the house and rarely leaves his room."

"There's nothing I can do anymore."

"Bullshit," she snaps. "When you love someone you do anything you can to fix it."

"I never said I loved him," I retort.

She looks at me over her shoulder. "Didn't have to." Her words burn a little. "His midterm review is tonight at 7. I really think you should go to it."

"Why?" I ask to humor her.

"I think it'll be good for you. I go to the ones during finals week with Hux, and I'm always amazed by that man and what he can do with a cello."

"I'll think about it," I say just to shut her up.

"Well," she stands up and clicks her lipstick shut. "I'm leaving, but if you do decide to go. Please raid my closet."

"Ok, won't need to, but I appreciate the offer. Have a good night," I say and she gives me a kissy face as she walks out of the door.

I sit and stare at the black dress in my closet. There's an unexplainable pull that I'm feeling to go to this performance and I don't know why. We haven't exchanged more than a hand full of words outside of lab since we broke up so I think going would be weird.

A little after 6, I can't take it anymore and get up from the futon. I slip my one black dress on that I wore for high school graduation and dig through Gwen's closet for a pair of maroon heels and matching bag and tie my dressy black coat around me. I take one look at myself in the mirror and before I have a chance to talk myself out of it, head out the door.

Bens POV

I stand in the back of the foyer watching as people head into the performance hall and I take stock of the people I know who are here. My parents walk in with the neighbors and Voi follows right behind them with one of her brothers. I tried to get her to not come but ever since Rey and I broke up, she has intensified in her advances and I've slowly stopped fighting her because it's really not worth my energy.

I watch a couple more people enter and then I see her. Her hair is swept to one side and she wears a black dress with a pea coat which is tied at her waist. She looks sophisticated and classy, and a lump forms in my throat. I step back a little so she doesn't see me and she heads into the performance hall, ducking her head as if she is also attempting to hide.

I wait patiently in the wings for my classmates to perform and take deep breaths trying to calm myself. I never got a chance to play for her so this is the first time she's going to hear me play but I wish it was on better terms. The performer in front of me finishes and the audience claps as she bows.

I take a deep breath, adjust my tie, and walk out to the stage as Dr.Kenobi announces my name and the piece I will be playing. The lights are bright and I can't see anyone past the front four rows in the audience as I sit down and settle my cello in front of me. Placing the bow to the strings, I take one more deep breath, picture Rey's face, and start playing.

Reys POV

I sit in the second to back row, hopefully far enough back that neither Ben nor his mom will notice me. The girl with the violin finishes her solo, meaning Ben should be next according to the program. He walks out onto the stage carrying what looks like a larger violin with him. He's done up in a suit and tie and looks very dapper.

I watch in anticipation as he places the bow to the strings, closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and starts to play. The sound that immediately moves across the hall is mesmerizing. His fingers move up and down the neck of the cello with such grace and speed, I can't take my eyes away. His head bobs as he plays, flipping his hair around his face. The performance is as beautiful as he is and I realize just how much I miss him.

He hits the final note, letting it echo through the room for a second, and then stands up to bow. I feel myself involuntarily clapping and smiling as if he's smiling at me.

After two more performances, the lights come up slightly in the performance hall and I allow everyone to leave before me, making sure to keep my head down so I'm hopefully not spotted.

Once I think the foyer is busy enough to slip out without being noticed, I get up and make my way to the door. I sneak between a few people and then I see him; Ben stands near the exit talking to his parents, Voi, and her parents. Of course, she's here and I feel my heart drop.

I look at him as I try to sneak past undetected, but both he and his dad spot me, their eye contact activating a flight response and I dart out the door, feeling my cheeks flush at being caught.

"Wait!" I hear a voice behind me as I walk down the sidewalk and I stop to find Ben's dad behind me.

"Hi, Mr.Solo."

"Please, call me Han." I smile at him as he says this. "How you been kid?"

"I've been okay," I say politely.

"So, what brings you here tonight? I thought you two weren't a thing anymore."

"I honestly don't know why I'm here," I respond sheepishly while wrapping my coat around me. Han shoves his hands in his pockets and takes another step towards me causally.

"He misses you, ya know?"

"I doubt that. He's been spending a bunch of time with Voi."

"Oh, God. She's a vulture. He physically can't get away from her," he says and I chuckle a little, still trying to think of a reason to escape. "Forgive me for my forwardness, but did you love my son?" I look at him not knowing how to respond to his sudden question. "Because he loved you. I've never seen him like that before."

"Yeah," I say crossing my arms over my stomach out of discomfort. "I did love him. Or I do love him. Honestly, I don't even know anymore," I ramble.

"It's never too late to tell him. Who cares about my wife's stupid rules anyway? Besides, she's the one that took me back after I left for so long."

"Rey?" Ben sticks his head out of the door and steps out. He sticks his hands in his pants pocket and I gulp at the up-close sight of him in his suit.

"Hi," I nearly whisper as I look at him blankly. "Beautiful performance."

"Thank you."

"Ben!" Voi opens the door next to him and she puts her hand on his arm like normal. I wait for him to correct her on his name and push her hand away like he always does, but he doesn't do either. "Your professors are looking for you."

"Ok, I'll be right there," he says but she doesn't move.

"I should be going," I say backing down the sidewalk. "Great to see you again Mr.Solo." I walk away without saying goodbye to Ben or Voi.

"See ya, sweetheart," Han mumbles as I walk as fast as I can in these heels back to my dorm. 'Ben is with her. There's no way you can tell me they aren't together. I feel a tear run down my face and I brush it away.'

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

"Come on, it'll be fun Rey." Gwen lays on the floor of Rose's dorm and pouts at me.

"No, I'm not going."

"Rey please, you've barely left the dorm recently," Rose pleads. "It'll be good for you to get out and do something."

"It's only for freshmen, he won't be there," Gwen adds.

"I wouldn't care if he would be." I cross my arms.

"Oh please, you have barely eaten in the dining room with us because he's there, you switch seats in photography whenever it's possible and you spend the entire music class slouching behind me so Ren can't see you. You care." Rose calls me out.

"Fine," I concede. "Tell me more about it so I know what I'm getting myself into."

"Yay!" Gwen sits up from her lying position on the floor. "So it's a freshman workout in the rec hall. My Mysticism professor, Professor Skywalker is running it. I went to his one last week where he taught us beginner karate but the yoga instructor for this week is sick, so he volunteered to teach this one too. He's a spunky dude, you'll like him."

"I'll go, but I need to change," I say and the girls give each other a victorious look.

An hour later, after running to our dorm to change, I follow Gwen and Rose into the Recreation building carrying yoga mats. Gwen let me borrow her old one so I wouldn't have to use one of the loaners at the gym and I dug through my now full dresser and was able to locate my thickest pair of leggings and put on a sports bra with a tank top. The late October wind is chilly and I'm glad I have my winter coat from the Unkar's.

We walk into the large class fitness room and leave our shoes and coats on the side, finding a spot for our mats on the side of the room. I look around the room at who is here and spot a lot of people I've met through classes and a few that Gwen has introduced to me in passing.

To my surprise, I spot Ben standing on the side of the room with a few other student mentors. He sees me too and watches me get settled on my mat between Gwen and Rose as he continues to talk to the people by him.

"Why is Ben here?" I hiss at Gwen.

She shrugs. "Must have volunteered to be one of the helpers. They're required to help with a few breakout activities for the freshman."

"Fantastic," I mumble.

A short man around my height walks into the room with a yoga mat flung over his shoulder and his hood up. When he reaches the stage and sets his mat down, he turns around and takes his jacket off and I realize that Professor Skywalker is Ben's Uncle Luke that I met at his parent's house. He calls the mentors to him and hands them a couple of bags of tennis balls to pass out to the room. There's probably at least 50 of us freshmen here by now, hopefully enough to blend in.

I watch out of the corner of my eye praying Ben doesn't come near me and let out a sigh of relief when he gets stuck on the other side of the room dodging Voi's advances. Another mentor hands me a tennis ball and I relax a little knowing I avoided him this time.

"Good evening," Luke greets us. "I haven't taught yoga for probably over 20 years, but we're going to give this a shot since the regular instructor is at home sick." He grabs a tennis ball and puts it on the floor in front of him and demonstrates how he wants us to roll our feet around on them to loosen them up. He starts talking as we roll them out. "The student mentors are here to help me out today. They have the option to participate, but most of them are here to help you adjust your stance. If they see something that is terribly off, they'll come over and help you out. If a pose is too hard for you, please feel comfortable returning to child's pose and taking a breather."

Luke has us roll the balls to the side of our mats and he has us take a few cleansing breaths in. I can feel Ben's eyes on me from the back of the room and it makes me hyper-aware of my movements. Luke moves us through down-dog and into chaturanga and back into plank, and I know full well that Ben is most likely watching my ass through all of this. A couple of mentors walk around and help a few students adjust their plank pose.

"I want you to stretch your left leg all the way out behind you and then you're going to step it all the way up into low lunge." We do as he says and giggles erupt throughout the room as a few students fall over. Ben moves to help a girl a few mats away from me readjust and I take a deep breath as he gets closer. I follow Luke's instructions until I am in the warrior 2 pose with my legs in a low lunge, my upper body turned outwards slightly, and my arms extended above my legs.

I feel two hands lightly grab my arms and readjusted them so they are perfectly level. I immediately recognize the touch as Ben's and I freeze. "You can't avoid me forever." He whispers as he rotates my arms a little more so they are directly above my legs again. "Nice outfit. One of my favorites yet."

I blush and he walks away to help another student. Voi looks at me from the other side of the room and I go back to focusing on Luke's next instruction. Gwen glances at me under her arm when we return to down-dog and mouths the words "holy shit" at me and I return a look confirming my surprise as well.

At the end of the class, we roll up our mats and I try to get out of the room as fast as I can but Gwen says she needs to talk to Ben quickly. I protest but she promises it will only take a minute and walks over to him. They talk for a few minutes, and Rose and I hang back watching him glance at us over Gwen's head nervously.

Finally, Gwen says goodbye and comes back by us to leave.

"What was that about?" Rose asks.

"I wanted to talk to him about the Halloween party we're having next Saturday. It's a huge bash and all of Hoth street is one massive party so we're going to decorate and open the house up to join in. You two are coming of course."

"Absolutely not. Tonight was bad enough." I say.

"Rey stop it. He couldn't take his eyes off of you because your ass is killer in those leggings. You can't honestly tell me it was that bad." Gwen rolls her eyes at me.

"That's the problem, I don't want his eyes on me."

"I don't think he can help it honestly." She shrugs.

A week later, I glare at Gwen as she doees my makeup for the Halloween party tonight. She somehow convinced me to dress up with her as the Light and Dark dancer from the Black Swan that stars Natalie Portman. She wears a white corset, a small white tutu with feathers in it, tights, and ballet flats, while I'm in the same outfit just all black. We got in a fight earlier over the corset though, because the only one she could find for me was in the lingerie department but she insisted that it's a college party, I'll fit right in. She pulled both of our hair up in a tight bun and is now working on my makeup. I'm not sure what I look like but all I know is that she has put an insane amount of dark stuff on my face so far.

She pulls back from me with a very accomplished look on her face. "Perfect." She hands me a hand mirror and I look at the impressive smokey eye she has crafted. She applied enough contour that my cheeks no longer look round, but instead sharp and angular. I pull the mirror close to look at the eyelashes and find small feathers on the ends of a few of them. Wow, Gwen really goes all out.

I sit and play on my phone as she finishes her makeup with a light white and silver look. I look at Rose's story to find her wearing a black mini dress, a dalmatian print jacket, and a wig that makes her look like Cruella Deville. In her video, she starts on herself as she pretends to puff a long fake cigarette and then pans to Finn and Poe who wear ears and spotted shirts. How she convinced them to be her Dalmatians is beyond me, but I look forward to seeing them in person.

Hux picks us up in his car, a small black Toyota Sedan with red accents on the outside and inside. "Hey, Rey," he says as I climb into the backseat and am relieved to find that Ben isn't with him.

"Hey, Hux, nice to see you."

"Yeah, you too," he mumbles as he pulls away from the curb. He isn't really one to show emotion or general fondness so I take this as a small win.

As we pull down the street, I see that Gwen was not exaggerating when she told me about how busy this night was because almost all of the doors of the houses are open, with lights in the window, and people in all of the yards. "This is crazy." I marvel.

"This is nothing, just give it another hour to get going," Gwen says from the front seat.

Hux parks his car all the way in the back of the house next to Ben's jeep, we get out, and Gwen fixes my tutu before we walk into the house. As we walk in the back door, the sound hits me like a wall and makes me nearly lose my balance. I follow behind Gwen as she moves confidently through the people and greets them, taking the rightful role as host of the party because I know Ben and Hux are probably unenthused about this.

I mingle with Rose for a while at the party until I can't avoid going upstairs to use the restroom anymore. I wait awkwardly in the hallway looking at Ben's bedroom door since there's someone in the bathroom. Everything in me wants to go in there but I decide against it.

I'm startled as the door to his bedroom opens but it's not him who walks out, instead, I see Voi.

"Hey, Rey." She smiles, flips her hair, and walks down the stairs behind me. She's wearing a Hooters costume which leaves very little to the imagination and her cheeks are slightly flushed.

"Hey," I reply quietly and watch her walk down the stairs. 'What was she doing in there? Is Ben in there? I have a funny feeling I don't want to know the answer to that.' I jump again as the door opens and Ben exits his room, fixing his hair.

"Oh hey." He stops in his tracks and stares at me with the face of a kid who just got caught doing something he wasn't supposed to be. "Nice costume." He looks down at my costume and I suddenly feel naked. I'm sure it's not going unnoticed that I'm wearing lingerie.

"Thanks," I respond sheepishly. "Where's yours?"

"I'm not keen on Halloween. Just doing this because Gwen got mad at us for not having a party last year.

"Ah."

He runs his hand through his hair again and looks at the wall behind me. "Voi and I aren't... that isn't what..."

The bathroom door opens and I let out a relieved breath. "You know what, it doesn't matter," I say and walk into the bathroom.

I quickly close the door behind me, lock it, and put my head against the door. The bathroom smells like a mixture of alcohol, urine, and a little bit of Ben's cologne. I turn around and lean against the door looking at the shower and let my mind wander. I think of that morning I snuck in behind him in the shower, the look in his eyes, and the feeling of his body against mine. I snap myself out of my trance and wipe the tear from my cheek, knowing I can't allow myself to go back into those dark thoughts.

I walk down the stairs and move into the living room a few minutes later. Ben stands on the side, leaning on the window frame talking to a friend and drinking a beer. His eyes move across the room, settling on Voi for a minute, and then continuing across the room until he meets my eyes and I turn to go find Gwen immediately.

"Gwen, I'm going to go," I tell her as soon as I find her on the back porch with Hux.

"What? No, you can't!" She stands up from the railing she was sitting on.

"Being here hurts too much. I don't like seeing them together so I need to go," I explain.

"Seeing who together?" Gwen looks at me confused.

"Ben and Voi. I caught them coming out of his room together and he's in there making eyes at her across the room." I say and Gwen gives Hux an urgent look.

"Damn it." He stands up and walks inside.

"Do you want a ride?" She asks me.

"No, I'll be okay." I walk off the porch and head back to my dorm fighting back tears. It's been a month, of course he moved on, I just didn't think he would have moved on with her. I pull on the fake eyelashes as I walk but the glue doesn't let go so I just leave them.

As I reach the dorm, I recognize the jeep sitting in front and assume he's dropping Voi off so I drop my head and try to sneak past. "Rey!" I hear his voice as the car door opens.

I stop walking to get out my swipe card but don't turn around. "Rey." He says again. "Talk to me."

"No. Ben. Just no," I snap, flipping around to him and he takes a sharp breath in. "This is done. Let's get through the next month and a half of this semester, and then pray we don't have any more classes together and don't need to see each other." My words come out sharp and he takes a step back from me.

"Rey," he pleads.

"Ben, It was nice to see you happy tonight, but this is over," I say and walk through the front door of the dorm leaving him alone on the front step.

Chapter Text

Bens POV

It's the last Friday before finals week begins meaning tonight is my second Music Review of the semester that will act as my final. It's been over a month since I have had a normal interaction with Rey that didn't involve her avoiding eye contact and icy words. There have been many days where I wanted to fix us by grabbing her by the shoulders and telling her to snap out of it. I've just wanted to scream "I love you" right in her face since I never got a chance to tell her before but I think it's too late. Like Dr.Willaims said, when you find someone that makes you feel like she makes me feel, you hang on for everything you're worth and hope she does the same. Well, she didn't do the same, she gave up and walked away from me instead.

I put my Cello down and massage my hand out, scanning across the music with my eyes. Dr.Kenobi helped me pick out the solo for tonight and it's the most challenging one I've done to date. I played it for him a few weeks ago and he stopped me in the middle to explain the story behind it because he felt like I wasn't getting it. Unbeknownst to me, I picked a solo by a Spanish composer that tells a tragic romantic story, and Dr.Kenobi had told me that I wasn't giving the song the emotion it needed. That day, he told me that when I played, I needed to think about the most tragic love story I had ever read or watched, such as Romeo and Juliet, and pour those feelings into my performance. Since then, every time I practice the piece, I don't think of any fictional story, instead, I think of one person: Rey.

I stand in my normal spot in the back of the foyer of the music building watching people file into the performance hall. My parents and Voi's walk-in together followed by Voi and her two brothers. Gwen and Hux walk in hand in hand, Hux looks miserable as he always does and Gwen waves at me across the foyer with a big smile. I twist my hands in front of me hoping I'll see Rey come in, but the lights flash in the foyer signaling that the doors are closing, and there's no sign of her. My heart drops a little and I make my way downstairs to join everyone backstage.

When it's my turn, Dr.Kenobi walks out to the stage and takes the microphone. I follow him out once he announces my name and take my spot in the chair and adjust the music on the stand.

My nerves are less than they were for the last performance due to the absence of Rey tonight, but they are replaced by an emptiness as I miss her and wish she was here. I put the bow against the strings, take a deep breath, and as the first note rings out her face pops into my head

I close my eyes and continue to play, allowing my fingers to find their path as they have the hundreds of other times I've played this in the practice room. I see her, all of her, and all of the moments we had together. I see her in the hallway when she was lost, her eyes when she was angry at me for making fun of her being from Jakku over ice cream, her face when she realized we would be photography partners, and the shock when I brought her coffee. I watch in my head as she smiles at me in the cantina as we shared our art, the nervousness when she was modeling for me in the basement, her giggles in the jeep when we got caught in the rain, and her laughing at the table with my parents as they told embarrassing stories about me over dinner. I feel her lips on mine in my parent's basement and the art library, the feeling of her in my arms, the tickle of her breath and eyelashes on my bare chest as she sleeps, and the rush from her hands wrapping around my torso in the shower. I focus on her features, her hazel eyes that disappear when she smiles, her nose that crinkles up when she laughs, her perfect lips that part ever so slightly when she sleeps, and her freckles that cover her shoulders and cheeks in the sun. As I reach the end of the song, I see it, my least favorite part, her walking away in the art building before I could tell her I love her, and her turning to me in front of the dorm, the coldness in her expression, and the bite in her tone as she tells me we're done and walks away. The last note of the song rings out and I feel a single tear slip out from between my closed eyelids and trail down my cheek. The crowd in the room bursts out into applause and I open my eyes, my family and friends beam up at me and my dad gives me two thumbs up, but when I look at Gwen, she is frowning as she claps, probably knowing exactly what just happened.

"You played that for Rey didn't you?" Gwen says from the door of the instrument storage room as I put my cello away.

"It doesn't matter Gwen," I mutter.

"Like hell, it doesn't."

"I really don't want to do this right now."

"Why are you so bullheaded?" She snaps.

"Gee I don't Gwen, why are you?"

"Because you're both my friends and I want you to be happy. I'm the only one who sees both of you on a regular basis and let me tell you, you two are some of the most miserable people I know."

"You really know how to kick a guy when he's down don't ya?"

"Talk to her Ren, or I'm getting involved because I can't handle this anymore."

"I CAN'T," I yell as I slam my fists into the lockers and then run my hands aggressively through my hair as I let out a heavy sigh. "Gwen, close the door," I say with a lowered voice and a clipped tone as I sit on the floor. She does as I say and sits down next to me on the floor not saying anything, waiting. "I need you to be my friend right now and I need to tell you something," I say quietly after I've calmed down.

"Okay, what is it?" She says with a much calmer voice.

I stare at the wall and take a deep breath. "I can't get Rey back, because I've done something she won't forgive me for."

"What's that? She's forgiven you for a pretty big thing once already. I think she'd surprise you." Gwen tries to reason.

"That's different. I didn't know her when the accident happened, I knew her when I did this. To make it worse, I was in love with her when I did this, and yet it happened."

"Ren, what is it?" She turns her body to look at me dead on.

"I had sex with Voi," I say in nearly a whisper.

"On Halloween..." She responds with the voice of someone who just made a major revelation.

"How did you...?"

"Rey already knows. Remember, she caught you two coming out of your room? I tried to tell her that that's not what happened, but she was convinced she was right, and apparently, she was."

"Shit," I say putting my head back to rest on the wall.

"Why'd you do it?" She asks without judgment.

"I was lonely, I missed Rey, and Voi was easy. She's pretty much been throwing herself at me for years, so I figured, why not? A little unattached sex never hurt anyone."

"But?"

"But when you love someone else, it hurts all parties involved." Gwen wraps her arms around mine and leans her head on my shoulder. After a deep sigh, she responds.

"I'll be honest with you, this complicates things a lot. But, if you don't try to fix this, you're going to regret it forever," Gwen says.

"I know, but I can't hurt her anymore."

"You need to at least try to talk to her." She stands up and holds her hand out to me to help me up. "Don't be weirded out by this Ren, but I love you. You're like my annoying big brother and I need you to be happy so I can stop worrying about your stupid ass already." She grins at me and I laugh.

"I love you too Gwenny," I say and pull her into a quick hug.

We join everyone upstairs and I'm happy to see that the crowd has thinned out a touch while we were downstairs. Dr.Kenobi stops me right as I reach the circle of my parents and Voi's family.

"Ben, that was amazing," Dr. Kenobi says. "I was impressed by our last rehearsal, but this time, you really took my advice and poured so much emotion into it."

"Thank you Dr.Kenobi," I say shaking his hand.

He turns to my dad and shakes his hand. "Han great to see you again, Leia see you on Monday." He kisses my mom's hand and heads to his office.

"Ben that really was beautiful." My mom says as she pulls me away from the group and brushes a stray hair off my face. "What were you thinking about up there? You looked so sad."

"I still love her mom," I say looking down into her soft expression.

She pulls her mouth into a straight line and pulls me into a hug. "I know baby, it'll all work out like it's supposed to."

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

Finals weeks comes finally and we all pack to go home for break. The last month and a half has been rough as I try to make it through classes with Ben. I was able to switch with Voi in Bio which she was a little too happy about but I didn't care as long as I wasn't partners with Ben anymore. Shortly after that, Ben convinced Maz to change him back to Solo in her roster so we wouldn't have to be partners there either. It was definitely a blow to separate from him like that, but it alleviated a significant amount of anxiety and allowed me to heal more. Continuously working together in class just kept opening old wounds.

Rose offered for me to stay with her and her family for the break in Bighton which is a suburb of one of the next large cities south of Crait. The day that the dorms closed, Rose, Finn, and I got a ride down to Canto from Poe and boarded the train to Bighton. I had never been on a train before and I sat in the window staring out at the surroundings flashing by for the two-hour ride.

Rose's mom picked us up at the train station and we dropped Finn off on our way to their house. Rose's family's house was modest but cute and located in a quaint neighborhood that I only ever dreamed of growing up in. Complete with a white picket fence and Christmas lights shining through the snow, it was my dream house. They were very welcoming and accommodating by allowing me to stay in Rose's room while Rose shared a bed with her sister Paige and I loved her parents.

We spent the three weeks I was there watching movies, playing board games, and sledding during the days. On Christmas morning, her parents even made sure to give me gifts cards in my own stocking and a small set of new paintbrushes so I felt included. The gesture didn't go unnoticed and I had to fight back tears as this was the first happy Christmas I had ever had.

Christmas evening as we watched the Christmas Story in the living room, I scrolled through my Instagram feed to catch up with what everyone was doing. Poe posted his cheesy Christmas card he always takes with his cat in front of the fireplace and Gwen posted a photo with Hux in front of the Christmas tree, Hux looked miserable in the sweater I'm sure Gwen forced him to wear, but it wasn't that different than his usual face. Finn had apparently gone to a movie with his family according to his photo on his story featuring popcorn in front of a big screen. Rose had posted a photo we took Christmas morning in front of the tree wearing antlers with me in the middle of her and Paige. When I took a moment to look at the likes on Rose's photo, I noticed that Ben liked the photo which just annoyed me.

I scrolled a little further and stopped in shock when I saw Voi's post with the caption "Christmas with my loves" and three photos to swipe through. The first was of Voi and her family and I noticed how similar she and her brothers all looked to each other. The second was of her family and Bens standing together in the Solo's front foyer in front of the tree. Ben stands between Voi and his mother, his arms around both of them and she leans into him. The third was of her and Ben sitting on the edge of the couch in his parents living room, he's pointing at the camera saying something and his arm is draped over her shoulder as she kisses his cheek. As soon as I saw it, I felt sick, and I had to fight back tears for the remainder of the movie.

New Years' Eve morning after a goodbye breakfast we pack up our bags and board the train back to Canto with Finn. Rose and Finn would be returning in a couple of days, but it had been decided that I would be staying with Poe for the remainder of the break. For New Year's though, Gwen invited all of us to her family's annual New Year's Eve party. I was hesitant at first because I knew Ben would be there, but when Finn and Rose said they wouldn't go unless I did, Poe called me and adamantly told me I had to.

Poe picks us up late that afternoon at the train station and takes us back to his house to get ready before the party in three hours. He shows Rose and I the room we're going to be sharing and takes Finn to the movie room where the sleeper sofa is.

"So, are you ready to face him?" Rose says laying back on the huge guest bed after the boys head down the hallway.

"Not at all," I mumble as I hold two shirts in front of the mirror to compare them.

"You really think those two are together?" She asks.

"Did you not see that photo, Rose?"

"Yeah, that was pretty bad." She sits up and looks at me with an excited face.

"On a different note, have you noticed how weird Poe and Finn are with each other?"

"Yeah, I did actually, what's with that?"

"I think they like each other. I know Finn is gay, but what about Poe?" She asks me.

"He is? I thought he liked you!" I turn quickly towards her.

"Ew, definitely not! Trust me, he's gay, he's just not crazy about flaunting it everywhere yet."

"Well now I feel like an idiot," I say, slightly embarrassed. "I don't know about Poe though. He had a girlfriend in High School but hasn't had one since. Plus he's just a natural flirt, so I can't really tell. Finn commented heart eyes under Poe Christmas Card and Poe liked it. I don't really know what to make of that though."

"We'll have to watch them tonight and see what we can figure out." She smiles and gets up off the bed and starts rummaging through her bag. "Okay, what are you wearing?"

We get ready for the party and I curl my hair so it lays across my shoulder in soft curls. I put on my new pair of black skinny jeans and heeled boots with leather straps across the back that I bought with one of the gift cards from Rose's parents. I top the outfit off with a black satin spaghetti strap tank top with a sheer back and a blazer with sparkly accents on the lapels, sleeves, and pockets. Rose's outfit is similar with her dark jeans, and deep maroon tank top she got at the same store as me and a leather jacket. Gwen told us club wear so I'm assuming this will work.

"Damnnnnn," Poe yells as Rose and I walk down the stairs in the foyer. "Our dates are hot!" He takes my hand and leads me to his car in front of the house and Finn walks with Rose.

As we pull up to Gwen's house, I feel like I'm going to puke. I pull the visor down and check my eye makeup and lipstick one more time before Poe opens my door to help me out. "You look beautiful. Stop worrying about him," Poe whispers in my ear as he grabs my hand and kisses it but doesn't let it go. "You've got me. I'm yours all night."

A tall blonde woman who I can only assume is Gwen's mom opens the door and greets us enthusiastically. She points us in the direction of the basement where the "kids" party is, Finn opens the door and we make our way down. The basement stairs open up into a wide room and I fully take in the mini club that Gwen has set up. The basement is dark and uplit with color-changing lights, there's a bar to one side with drinks and snacks, a dance floor, a giant tv screen of Time Square, and various bar games and arcade games in an adjacent room. We reach the bottom step and Gwen attacks me with a hug which I excitedly reciprocate since I haven't seen her for three weeks.

As she moves down the line with her hugs, I look around at all the faces and find that there are a lot of people here that I recognize from school and a bunch that are probably friends of Gwen's brother. As I scan, I spot Ben walking towards us with Hux and I tense my hand on Poe's causing him to glance down at me.

Ben is wearing dark blue jeans, and a button-up black shirt that gaps at the base of his neck framing his adam's apple and that pulls ever so lightly across his chest. I look at the sleeves that are rolled up on his arms showing off his forearms and gulp as I look at his hands that are dwarfing the beer bottle he carries. I snap back to reality as I realize how close he is and start talking to Gwen to make myself look busy.

Ben's POV

I stand to the side of the room and chat with Hux and Gwen. Gwen is decked out head to toe in glitter and is high on energy as she always is at these yearly parties. They give me the rundown on their Christmas and Voi stands near trying to keep an eye on me. Since the semester ended, the fact that I was still in Crait while she moved back to her parents in Canto didn't seem to stop her advances and frankly, they seemed to be getting worse. I'll admit that I probably haven't helped by occasionally flirting back and the Halloween situation, but I've been lonely and it has helped me get over Rey a little.

Hux asks how break has been for me since he's been staying with his parents but my answering get's cut short by Gwen. "OMG, THEY'RE HERE!" She screams and runs towards the stairs. I look at the stairs to find Finn and Rose entering with Poe close behind them holding a girl's hand who's face is obstructed by her hair as she looks down. In the low light she could be anyone, but I anxiously wait to confirm if it is Rey. When she reaches the bottom of the stairs, she flips her hair back with her free hand and I gasp at how beautiful Rey looks. She's wearing all black with a sparkly jacket, her eye makeup is dark and her lips have a deep maroon on them. Her hair is curled into soft waves and it falls softly on her shoulders just how I like it. I gulp as she smiles when she sees Gwen running at her with her arms open and Voi elbows me in the stomach.

"Want to dance?" Voi yells up at me.

"No," I say as I follow Hux hesitantly towards the new arrivals behind Gwen. As we get closer, I look at her and catch her staring at my arms and I smirk at the fact that I caught her checking me out.

We greet them and Rey makes sure to keep Poe between herself and me so I don't get a chance to say hi. I also take note of the fact that she still has not let go of his hand. 'What is with these two now?'

Around 10:30 Gwen comes storming to the group with a determined look on her face. She grabs Rey's hand aggressively and then mine with her other hand. I stumble behind her as she storms through her parent's wine cellar and into the room where her dad makes the wine. She releases both of our hands and walks back to the door and turns to us. "Figure it out you two." I move towards her trying to stop her as she takes the inside handle of the door off and slams it shut.

"Shit," I say looking at the handleless door with the hinges on the outside. "We're stuck."

Rey walks to the wall without saying anything and slides down it into a seated position. "Good thing this juice is spiked or I don't know if I would be this calm." She says as she takes a large gulp.

"Because of being claustrophobic?" I ask moving back towards her.

"No, because I don't want to be anywhere near you," she says staring at the lights on the ceiling with a blank expression.

I lean against the opposite wall and try to think about what to say. "How has break been?"

"Fine." She pauses. "How's your girlfriend?"

"Excuse me?"

She looks me dead in the eyes, her makeup intensifying her already serious expression. "Voi, How is Voi?"

"She's fine as well. And she's not my girlfriend."

"Christmas with my loves," she says in a mock high pitch voice. "Not your girlfriend?"

"I tried to get her to change it. You know how stubborn she is."

"She get you in bed yet?"

"No," I lie.

"Don't you dare lie to me," She snaps.

"Fine," I remember Gwen saying Rey knows. "Once on Halloween."

"Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner."

"Rey stop it. It didn't mean anything. I only did it because I was lonely and she wouldn't leave me alone."

"Great attitude Ren."

"Stop calling me that."

"Why? You're not my boyfriend. Voi can call you 'Ben' now that you're screwing her."

"It was once and I told you that already." She just glares at me. "It could have been more but I felt so guilty afterward I couldn't do it again. I felt guilty literally the minute it was done before you even caught us. You catching us just made me feel like garbage."

"Whatever." She rolls her eyes. "I shouldn't care anyway."

"Why do you care then?"

"Why do you keep staring at my hand in Poe's?"

"Because I want it to be mine," I say cooly and she rolls her eyes with no response.

We sit there in silence for almost thirty minutes according to my watch and listen to the music booming outside of the room.

"How have you really been Rey?" I break the excessive silence.

She sighs deeply. "I told you, I've been fine."

I sit down right in front of her and look at her until she makes eye contact. Her gaze could still easily burn a hole right through me. "What happened to us?" I ask softly, ignoring her hard exterior.

"Ren, I don't feel like rehashing this."

"Why?"

"Because I don't." She takes a large drink out of her cup.

"Rey," I say looking into her eyes softly. "I'm not over you." She blinks at my words but she doesn't respond. "And I don't think you're over me either."

"And what makes you say that?"

"The way you checked me out when you first saw me tonight was a big one, or how about all of the times I caught you fighting back a smile in lab when I would crack a joke to the table, or the real kicker, you showing up to my Sophomore review at midterms."

"Or how about how I caught you and Voi coming out your room on Halloween and then a few minutes later watched you ogle at her from across the room"

"Enough about Voi. I don't care about her in the same way, I do you. She's the annoying neighbor girl who I've known since I was little. You have to remember that at the root of it, Voi and I are family friends and do get along when she isn't being obnoxious and she isn't trying to sleep with me."

"Seeing the photo on Christmas and knowing what happened on Halloween hurt." She says coolly.

"Why?"

" I don't know, I guess because I'm allowed to still care about you even though we broke up?" She says with a guarded expression and a slight crack in her voice like she's about to cry.

I take a deep breath and run my hands along my crossed legs. "Alright here's the deal Rey, I don't want to play this game anymore. If you can look at me and tell me you're over me and that you don't still love me then I'll let you go and leave you alone. I know I messed up. I know screwing Voi probably did a number to you and I know you might not be able to get over it. But I need you to tell me how you truly feel before I can let go."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because Rey." I look down at the floor before looking back up at her eyes burning into mine. "Because I still love you. I never stopped. Since that first time you smiled at me, like truly smiled at me, I have loved you, and you have been everything to me." She stares at me in shock. "But if you don't love me, I will let you go and leave you alone."

She looks at the floor for what I feel like is an eternity chewing on her lip and clicking her nails as she thinks. Finally, she looks at me but starts shaking her head and fighting back tears. "I can't." She says, still shaking her head as her face turns red from trying not to cry. I brace myself to have my heart ripped out of my chest and look at my hands in my lap. "I can't say that, because I haven't stopped loving you either," she nearly whispers to me.

I look up at her in shock and she breaks into a sheepish grin, tears running down her face. "Really?" I say as I let a giant breath out and she nods slowly, biting her lip. I get onto my hands and knees and crawl towards her slowly and she watches me in anticipation as I close the gap. "Rey, I love you," I say as I put my hand on her cheek and wipe away the tears.

"I love you too Benb" she whispers and I kiss her, able to feel her warm tears that are still flowing against my nose and cheek but I'm not willing to let her go yet, so I pull her into my lap and hold her. "I'm so sorry," she whispers into my chest and I nuzzle into her hair, oh how I've missed the smell of her and the feeling of being close to her.

I lean against the wall and pull her against me as we wait for Gwen to come to get us out because neither of us has cellphone reception to call anyone. She apparently remembers us shortly before midnight and opens the door.

"Oh thank God you made up and didn't kill each other," Gwen says, returning the handle to its spot on the door and waiting for us to release each other. "I knew it was a 50/50 shot putting you two in here."

I stand up and then pull Rey up off the floor. "I'll get you back for this," I say to Gwen as I walk out with Rey's hand in mine.

Rey's POV

We find the group again near the dance floor. Rose is off to the side talking to some guy I've seen a couple of times around campus, Hux is chatting with a few other History Majors, and Finn and Poe stand very close to each other talking with giant smiles plastered across their faces.

Ben wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head as Voi walks up and tries to break up our moment.

"Hey guys," she says.

"Can we not do this?" Ben snaps at her without releasing me. "You've caused enough problems and we still fixed it, will you please just back off?" She looks at him with hurt eyes and takes off into the crowd.

Gwen pulls Hux over by us as the countdown to midnight starts on the large tv screen. We all yell the numbers as they lower and as we get to 4, Ben grabs my face and pulls me towards him.

"I love you," he says.

"I love you too," I respond and pull him into a kiss right as everyone starts cheering and blowing the noisemakers. He releases me for a second so we can both take in the scene and enjoy the excitement in the room. Rose blushes as the guy she was talking to pulls back from a kiss and I feel my jaw drop open as I see Poe and Finn still kissing.

"Are they?" Ben says in my ear.

"Apparently," I say with a massive smile and he pulls me back to him for another kiss.

People begin to leave a little after midnight and the crowd thins out a little bit. By 1, it's down to just our friends sitting around the basement chatting now that the music has been turned off. Ben leans back into the corner of the sectional and I curl up under his arm looking at everyone. Gwen sits on Hux's lap in an armchair across the room talking his ear off as usual. Rose sits at the counter of the bar still talking to the Blonde hair boy with blue eyes who I still haven't met and Poe and Finn are across the room sitting on a half wall extremely close and talking in hushed voices.

"Alright, my car is leaving." Poe brings everyone's attention to him. "Rey, you coming with us or going with your boy toy?"

I look up at Ben with a grin and he responds to Poe. "If it's okay with you, I think I'm going to steal her tonight."

"Just have her back for lunch tomorrow."

Ben chuckles, "Can do."

"And only if you join us." Poe extends his hand towards us on the couch and Ben shakes it.

"Thanks, Poe." I stand up and give him a hug before they leave.

"Well, well." Hux starts as soon as the basement door at the top of the stairs closes. "Your scheming worked Gwen."

"Scheme?" I clarify.

"Oh yeah, I've been royally pissed off by you two refusing to work this out. And then I got even more pissed off when you let Voi post that photo on Christmas," Gwen rambles.

"She thought through at least 10 different plans to trap you two and make you work it out," Hux explains.

I look at Ben and we laugh. "Well, I guess we owe you a thank you," Ben says.

"Uh, you're welcome," Gwen responds with a joking attitude.

I turn to Ben and nuzzle my nose into his cheek as a subliminal message that we should leave.

"We're going to head out guys," Ben says as we start getting up. "Gwen, great party as usual. Maybe next year, don't lock anyone in a basement room with no cellphone service."

"Well next year, don't be a dumbass." She shrugs before giving both of us hugs. "See you two later."

"See ya." Hux gestures from the other side of the room and we say goodbye. Ben grabs my hand, and we walk out to the jeep together.

When we reach the jeep, he grabs my hips and spins me so I'm pinned up against the side of it. "I've missed you," He whispers, his lips brushing against mine and then kisses me deeply.

"I've missed you too," I whisper back as he trails kisses down my neck. "But we should probably get out of the Phasma's driveway before we accidentally rip clothes off."

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

The entire drive back to campus to Ben's house, I hold onto his hand and study him with a stupid grin on my face. I've missed his hair and how it swoops back from his face, his plump lips that just beg me to kiss them, and his beautiful chocolate eyes.

"What?" He says becoming uncomfortable.

"I love you," I say softly.

"I love you too," he looks at me briefly and squeezes my hand in his.

When we get back to the house, he unlocks the door and I follow him into the kitchen to get a snack. "What do you want to eat?" He asks as he looks into the fridge.

"I have no preference, you pick something," I say as I hop up on the counter since they apparently don't believe in a table and chairs. He digs around in the fridge and pulls out some leftover pizza and pops it in the microwave. I watch him intensely as his dress shirt stretches across his body with every movement.

The microwave beeps and he brings me a piece on a paper plate and leans against the counter sideways so he's facing me.

"Did you have fun tonight?" He asks as he takes a large bite of the pizza.

"Yeah, it was great seeing everyone. Plus getting you back was a pretty great bonus." I smile and I watch his eyes light up a bit.

"Are you okay with everything?" He furrows his eyebrows a little.

"What do you mean everything?" I clarify, setting my plate to the side.

"The whole Voi thing."

"Oh," I say quietly as I think. "I mean it's not ideal, and it hurts for sure, but it didn't mean anything right?"

"Purely physical." He swallows a drink of water, his brown eyes glancing at me momentarily. "How many details do you want before I continue?"

"I don't know. I'm just trying to feel comfortable." I shrug.

"Ok well I might put my foot in my mouth here, but it's worth a shot to help you feel comfortable. She came over before the party uninvited as usual, we took a few shots as friends, things escalated, we made out a bit, and moved to my room. We didn't do it on my bed, and we were both pretty much clothed still if either of those things matter. It was nothing more than physical and I regret it."

"Okay," I say quietly and stare at my hands. "That does help a little."

"Really, it was a rebound. I wanted it so bad with you so I just tried to get it with anyone to help me get over you. But the thing is that it's not the same when you don't love the person." He says and I lean down to kiss him lightly, catching him off guard.

"Thank you for your honesty," I whisper.

"You want another piece?" He asks, obviously not knowing what to say next. I shake my head no, but say I'll wait while he has another one, he is twice my size after all.

He leans next to me again to eat and we chat about our Christmas celebrations while he finishes his pizza. Once he's done, he takes both of our plates and rinses them off before setting them in the sink to be washed later. He returns and leans against the counter, facing me again.

"Bedtime?" He says to me, his eyes dancing a little, but I don't respond, I just look at him and run my hand through his hair. "Rey?"

"Come here," I say quietly and he gives me a puzzled look. "Come here," I repeat again and this time he listens. He stands up and moves so he's in front of me. I pull myself to the edge of the counter and pull him towards me so his front leans against the counter and my legs are straddling him. I shiver as he runs his hands up my legs and then up to my side as I run my hands through the bottom of his hair.

"I like this look you have going." He smirks at me.

"I figured you would,"

"Very sexy. Especially the tank top and the boots. The lipstick was pretty great too."

"That was the point," I whisper back and I pull his mouth to mine. Instinctively, I feel him press up against the counter and me, eliminating any gap between us that was left. His hands explore my body while my hands work to unbutton his shirt. Finally, I get the last one and slip the shirt down his arms, letting it drop on the floor and he runs his hands into my jacket and pushes it off onto the counter behind me.

"Rey," he whispers into my ear as he runs his hands up my back under my tank top and I kiss his neck. He grabs my legs and wraps them around himself so I'm once again like a Koala bear and carries me upstairs only breaking our lips apart when he needs to look where he's going. He throws me back on his bed gently and stands at the foot of the bed taking my shoes off. I shiver as he runs his hands up my body all the way to my breasts which are free under my shirt already.

I can feel him hardening as he bears his hips down on mine and I let out a small moan in response. He practically growls as he hears me and frantically grabs my hands and holds them above my head with his left hand. His right-hand moves to the bottom of my shirt, pulling it up, and I feel his mouth meet my nipple. I wiggle under him due to the sensation of pleasure mixed with the tickling and he moves back up, slowly kissing and lightly nibbling his way back up to my head.

"I need you to tell me exactly what you want," he whispers in my ear, my hands still trapped above my head. I feel my body tense as he pulls back a little to look me dead on the eyes, his eyes almost look darker than normal. "What do you want?"

"All of you," my voice comes out mostly as a gasp.

"Are you sure?" He asks, furrowing his brow a little bit not releasing my hands. "We don't have to do this."

"I know we don't have to, but I want to," I say confidently and fight him back for use of my hands. I roll him over so I'm straddling him and kiss him. "My turn," I whisper in his ear.

Bens POV

She lays on top of me running kisses along my neck and nibbling on my ear. She returns to my mouth and kisses me, our tongues exploring the other's mouth as she unbuckles my pants and I work to kick them off as she takes her shirt off. I tense as her hand moves down my torso and slips under the waistband and wraps around me lightly. She releases me and I begin to work on her pants button and zipper as she comes back down to kiss me.

"You're positive you want this? We don't have to have sex if you don't want to. We can just keep fooling around."

"Yes, I'm positive Ben," she says and I roll her off of me. I leave her laying on the bed on her back and walk over to my dresser to grab a condom. She watches me with intensity as I return, roll it on, and pull her tight pants down her body. I move back up to her face, hovering my body above hers as she runs both of her hands in my hair. I reach down to guide myself into her and hear her gasp as her entire body tenses around mine.

Reys POV

I wake up the next morning wrapped up in the sheets on Bens bed and his arm draped over me. I smile at the touch and back myself up a little bit closer and he wraps his arms around me tighter instinctively. "Hi, Love," he mumbles into my hair.

"Hi," I whisper back.

"How'd you sleep?"

"Better now that I get to lay next to you again, plus you wore me out." I turn over and snuggle into his chest.

"You feel okay about last night?" He says as he tightens one arm around me and plays with my hair with the other hand.

"I feel great about it Ben," I say against his chest. "Why are you so worried?"

"I've never been someone's first and I don't want to be responsible for pushing someone before they're ready. Especially not you."

"You didn't push me, I wanted it okay?" I pause and smile. "It was amazing actually and I can't wait to do it again."

"Yeah?" I can feel his face move as he smiles before he rolls me backward and lays on top of me. I look into his eyes for the first time since last night and I get lost in them momentarily. "I love you, Rey."

"I love you too," I say right before our lips meet.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

"Ready?" I turn to him as we pull up to the front of Poe's Grandparents' house.

"Yeah. I never thought I would be openly invited into this house," Ben says, adjusting the sleeves of his jacket.

"Come on," I say getting out of the Jeep. He gets out on his side and walks over to me, taking my hand in his. We knock on the door and I look up to him, it's clear how nervous he is right now so I squeeze his hand lightly.

The door opens and Poe's grandma is standing there. She's a petite woman with Olive skin and grey hair. "Rey," she pulls me down and into a hug. "And Ben." She hugs him and his eyes are huge. "It's good to see you again, how are your parents? I haven't seen them since the bake sale at the church last month."

"Uh, they're good Ma'am," Ben stutters, alarmed by the open hospitality.

"You can relax Son," Poe's grandma reassures him. "In this house, forgiveness and grace are some of the strongest principles."

"Thank you," He says sincerely to her.

"Come on in kids, the other three are upstairs in Poe's room," She says and motions up the stairs.

Ben follows me up the stairs to Poe's room and we look at each other apprehensively as we hear yelling. We open the door to find Rose and Poe yelling at each other and Finn sitting on a beanbag chair between them watching. "What happened?" I say to Finn.

"They've been like this for a while." Finn shrugs. "Rose beat Poe's high score in two tries and he's mad."

"She cheated!" Poe yells.

"No, I didn't! You're just a sore loser!" Rose yells back.

"I spent a year getting that high score. There is no way you did that in two tries without cheating."

"Not my fault that you suck."

"So, food?" I yell over them to break up the fight.

Poe and Rose stop and look at each other and then Poe claps his hands against his sides. "Fine. Let's go."

They wait a couple of minutes while I go to the guest room to freshen up since I didn't have a change of clothes with me last night. I change out of my jeans and boots for leggings and my fuzzy boots, but I opt to put the sweatshirt that Ben loaned me back on. It smells like him and it's so warm and comfy. If he thinks he's getting this back, he is sadly mistaken.

We all pile into Ben's jeep and we head out to the local deli that is known for their sandwiches and baked potatoes. It makes me happy to see my friends making such honest attempts to get along with Ben even if it is awkward.

"So Ren," Poe says through a mouthful of food mid lunch. "You still play soccer ever?" I look at Poe in shock. Poe had mentioned they had been in a kid's soccer league when they were little but I had admittedly forgotten about it.

"Uh, yeah. Actually I do sometimes." Ben swallows his food. "Mostly juggling by myself in the backyard, but I've tried to keep up on my skills a touch."

"Sweet. We could use a couple more guys for intramurals if you're interested."

Ben looks at him apprehensively for a second before responding. "I'd like that Poe, thanks."

I look up at Ben and smile and then catch Poe's eye. I mouth the words thank you at him before breaking eye contact. It makes me feel good that they're attempting to get along despite their history. After all, they are the two most important men in my life.

"So Rose," I turn my attention to her and she looks up suddenly from her phone. "Who was the blondie you were smooching with last night?"

"Just a guy." Her cheeks turn pink.

"A very hot guy," Finn interjects with a mouthful of food.

"Yeah, I guess," Rose says poking at her baked potato.

"What's his name?" I prompt

"Alan Ackbar. He's another Theatre major that I met through one of my classes." She says sheepishly.

"And why is this the first time we're hearing about this Alan Ackbar guy?" Finn questions.

"I don't know, I guess I didn't know he felt that way." She shrugs again.

I bump against Ben's arm with mine to check that's he's okay and he leans down to kiss my cheek.

"Alright you two, get a room," Poe says across the table and I stick my tongue out at him.

Two days later, I stand with Poe outside the train station as we walk Rose and Finn board their train back to Bighton. "So, Finn," I say to Poe with an amused tone once they're out of range.

"How'd I know you were going to do this right away?" He teases as we wave at them as they get on the train and we turn back to the car, his arms sling over my shoulder.

"Because I'm your best friend and you didn't make me aware of this very important change in your life." I look at him as we get into the car and buckle up.

He puts the key in the ignition to turn the heat on and turns to me. "I know I should have talked to you but I was just really freaked out. I spent my entire life so far believing that I like girls and only girls, but then I met Finn." I watch as he starts to involuntarily smile when he says Finn's name. "I tried to deny it for a bit. When you asked if I was hiding something, I was still in denial, I didn't want to admit it for a while. And then I didn't know how to tell anyone because then I felt like people would see my relationship with Keri as a lie."

"Poe, I would never think that."

"I loved her Rey, I truly did. There won't ever be anyone who can replace her." He fiddles with the keys hanging from the steering wheel. "but Finn is special to me too. He's the first person I've felt like this with since Keri."

"I'm glad your happy Poe. I don't care who you love, as long as you're happy." He smiles at me and hugs me across the center console before buckling his seatbelt to leave.

Chapter Text

Rey's POV

We finished out the second semester of the year happily and with only a few hiccups. Ben and I didn't have any classes together but I had two with Rose which was great. Rose and Alan fizzled out for a while following New Years but struck up a relationship again towards the end of March and have been together for the last month. Finn and Poe have made their relationship public since New Years and have been pretty much living together in Poe's apartment off-campus. Gwen and Hux had a pretty big blow out following the spring break trip with Ben and me and of course, put us in the middle of it. At this point, they're all mended and not trying to kill each other 24/7.

Leia and Han have welcomed me into their family with open arms and even threw me a small birthday party in April for my friends to come to. Voi has laid off her advances since Ben called her out on New Years and has even become somewhat civil. This is of course after she tried to make them sleeping together a big deal.

Ben asked me to move in with him and Hux following the closure of the dorms but Gwen and I decided we still wanted our own space, so starting at the end of the month, Rose, Gwen, and I have rented a house one street over from the Ben and Hux.

Tonight is Ben's final performance review for his sophomore year. He even bought me a new dress for me to wear tonight, it's a deep maroon, his favorite color on me, and it hugs me perfectly. Being Ben's girlfriend has been a dream and it's crazy to feel myself slowly falling more and more in love with him every day.

"Ready?" He says from the bedroom doorway, I look up from my notebook I'm writing in and smile. He's wearing his black tux with his bow tie still untied which gives him an even sexier look.

"Do you need help with the tie?" I ask as I close my notebook and place it back in my bag sitting on his bed.

"No, I hate tying these things too early. They make me feel like I'm suffocating."

I lean down while sitting to put my heels on and he moves towards me. "Here, let me help." He says grabbing my shoes and kneeling in front of me.

I sit back and watch his face intently as he guides my foot into the shoes and closes the buckles around my ankles. His brow furrows in concentration as his large fingers fumble with the miniature buckles and I can't help but smile at him.

"There, perfect." He says as he releases my feet and helps me up off the bed. I hold onto his hand as we make our way outside to the Jeep.

As we walk up the sidewalk that crosses over the main lawn to the music building, I take in the beautiful surroundings. The early May air is warm, with a slight cool breeze dusting goosebumps across me. The sun is just starting to set, casting a golden yellow light across the grass. Ben stops me when we reach the middle of the lawn and takes a step back from me, releasing my hand.

"What are you doing?" I smile and cock my head at him.

"You're stunning." He says with a smile and comes back to me, pulling me into his arms. His eyes are a dark honey color from the sun hitting them. "I love you so much, Rey. I don't know what I would do if I lost you.l

"You won't, I promise," I say softly as I run my fingers through his hair and he sneaks a kiss onto the palm of my hand as I pull it back down his jaw. "And I love you too." He kisses me passionately before we release and walk hand and hand towards the music building where we met 8 months ago.