Chapter Text
It was a fine Sunday morning. The sun was out high, the sky was bluer and clearer than it has been in a while, the breeze smelled fresh, people were out on their balconies, basking in the warmth. Now this, Yoongi wouldn't know. At this point he had already been awake for more than 21 hours. '21' because he had caught some restless sleep in the middle of the past three days when he had passed out on the floor next to his desk while setting up his stop-motion set. He was devastated when he woke up, on the verge of crying because he had been set back by 3 whole hours and now he had to rush everything even more- for he was a colossal idiot who had planned out his schedule for the entire duration of 24 hours, apparently forgetting that he hadn't really rested for the last two days and wouldn't be able to pull this off. Nevertheless, here he sat, hunched over his laptop, his room a mess of cardboard and wires going everywhere, as he fever edited his stop-motion project due by that afternoon. Not to mention he was still working on an entire sketchbook project with yellow as his main colour. That, and he also had to attend a workshop at 2pm for figure study. Yes, a fine Sunday, indeed.
Across the city from Yoongi's apartment, the football varsity team of the college the city was famed for, and their friends, was celebrating their teammate's baby shower.
"Ahhh, he is so cute! Fetus pictures!"
"He is so small, oh my god!"
Taehyung and Seokmin gushed over the photos Youngjae was showing them on his phone. The small diner in which they had all gathered seemed pretty empty for the time of the day. A given , considering how their captain had booked it for them, to which Jackson had gone , "Youngjae might be the one adopting but we all know who the real daddy is. Our very own sugar Beommie ..."
"Do you have a name thought out yet?" Jimin sat down as he placed their orders on the table. Youngjae looked up and gave a small smile, "I'm thinking of naming him Coco."
"Cocoo..." Mark gushed, "Very cute. Very you." Bambam nodded in agreement with such a serious face it was almost comical.
"Ahhh, I want a puppy too!" Taehyung sat back on the couch as he slid down until he was almost laying on it, pouting," 'Tis not fair!" Then, "Minnie!"
"Tae, I work at a diner, you work at the arcade, we are broke college students who barely survive on three hours of downtime. I told you, we cannot take on such a responsibility right now. " Jimin got up, he was working after all, and ruffled his boyfriend's hair , "Someday." Taehyung only slid down further, intensifying his pout with a hmph!
Jimin just smiled, fond, as he made his way back to the counter to check on how Seulgi was doing with the cupcakes.
"Bambam, are they done with rehearsals?" Youngjae asked as he suddenly remembered the absence of a certain college band.
"Ah, yes, they are on their way. It is almost eleven now, anyway, right?" He lifts up his phone and unlocks it, "Yes, it is. Oh! Just got a text. Yugy says they'll be here in five minutes. "
"I think we can add in an instrumental to complete the set, in case we don't finish this song by then. It could be one of our old ones too."
"Yeah, yeah, I agree," Jungkook nodded as he looked at their tentative set list.
"You're okay with that, right?" Yugyeom asked, looking carefully at his friend. Jungkook had been struggling for a whole two months to write the lyrics to this new song and he knew it troubled him, but with their college festival coming up in almost a week, they needed to prepare for a plan B, in case Jungkook wasn't able to write something by then.
"Yes, don't worry," Jungkook managed a wry smile. It was taking a toll on him, not being able to write as he usually could. Especially since he was really filled up with emotion every time he heard the instrumental. He had written the base melody out with Eunwoo at 2 am , right after their tests had gotten over. Barely functioning by the end of exam week, it was a surprise they came up with something tangible.
Sensing his sad mood, Eunwoo decided to pipe in ,"Hey, you could come with me to Binnie's workshop! The dance team is helping out the art students for a bit. It's a very calming environment, maybe it could help you spark a muse? "
"I don't know...but let's try it out, I guess."
Namjoon waited until the call rang through, for the third time, without it being picked up. He sighed, turning towards Jinyoung, "He's either dropped asleep, or he has lost his phone. Either way, there is still the possibility that he is ignoring the calls because of assignments. I think we should ask Kihyun to go check up on him." Jinyoung sighed, "What is with these work-hard-until-you're-worn-out types. Seriously, you guys kill productivity even more by not resting up!" He smacked his friend on the arm ,"Stop making that face! You know this is exactly what you do too!"
Namjoon grimaced, sheepish , "I'm not that bad..."
"No, you're worse. You-"
"Are we ready, gentlemen?" Namjoon and Jinyoung stopped their bickering to turn towards the friend they had been waiting for , their senior , Kim Seokjin.
"Yes, we just have to check in on Yoongi first," Jinyoung straightened up and replied. To this Seokjin let out a sigh , shaking his head , "He works too hard. Fool needs to plan his work better and stop taking on so many non college projects , especially when he knows he will have to rush through everything like this. I get he loves what he's doing and that he needs money, but he has been stretching it a bit too thin lately. He rejected my offer to be his model for his Figure Study project! Imagine! The audacity..."
"I think he is thinking about dropping that project, " Namjoon interjected , a bit on his toes while facing Seokjin . This was news to Jinyoung, he turned towards him, surprised , "What? Why? He does studies so well! Is that even possible? To drop a project? For college?"
"I am not sure...he says he hasn't been feeling inspired lately..." he looked towards Seokjin nervously. What Yoongi actually had meant what that he hadn't been feeling inspired by anyone lately and for some reason that made him not want to do said study at all... even though that isn't how it would work, considering he has to do it. He just hoped Seokjin didn't figure that part out , he knew he'd taken a liking to Yoongi...
"You mean...I, Kim Seokjin, star of campus, of this city, I... me??? He isn't inspired even after looking at me ???" Namjoon cringed internally as he tried to dissipate the tiny feeling of disappointment . He couldn't be blamed , really, who didn't have a crush on the drama major and social elite that was Seokjin?
Yoongi sat, eyes burning, staring at his laptop screen as he watched the final edit of his short movie. As soon as it was done, he attached it to the email he had pre-typed and sent the link to the file to his teacher. He slumped backward onto the floor and sighed. His eyes closed , he put his arm over his face . He was so tired. He was so drained. Not just physically too. His mind wandered again to the same few thoughts that he had been getting on and off the past few weeks. He didn't want to admit it out loud, out of fear, but he thinks he is getting sick of it. Sick of his major. Sick of art. He supposes that it is normal for any college going student to end up feeling like they hate their course at some point or the other, but this felt...different. He didn't feel inspired. He felt like he was just going through the motions, striving just enough to deliver his usual standard of work. He didn't...enjoy it as much as he did before. He was beginning to lose the spark of excitement he felt. Did he still like what he was doing? Sure. Did he want to stop? No. But he was still afraid. Afraid that he'd end up living robotically , even while doing something he loved...or once loved, more than anything.
His mini midday crisis was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell . He startled. Had he ordered food? Wait, had he eaten? He didn't feel hungry but he didn't remember eating anything either. Come to think of it, he probably missed breakfast too. He looked around to see a dried up bowl of instant noodles long gone cold. Shit , that was supposed to be last night's dinner. He hadn't eaten at least since then. The doorbell rang again , followed by rapping on the door.
"Min Yoongi! Get the hell up and open this door! "
'Kihyun? What was he doing here?' Yoongi wondered as he sat up, legs still sprawled out before him.
"YOONGI, WAKE UP!"
Yoongi startled and scrambled to get up to the door. Why was he so jumpy? Ah...lack of sleep.
"Yoon-" Yoongi opened the door and almost got hit in the face by his friend.
"Hey," he let out.
"Wha-"Kihyun looked surprised, then shocked, then angry ,"The hell have you been doing? Look at yourself! Have you looked at a mirror recently?! You look sick, Yoongi!" He pushed his way into the apartment, "And give me back the spare key! I should probably just move in, at this point, or you'll drive yourself into the hospital." Then, "When did you make this? " He pointed at the sad looking bowl of noodles, and turned to face him fully as Yoongi closed the door and stood in the entryway ,"Yoongi, when was the last time you ate?" Yoongi flitted his eyes away, rubbing the back of his head with his hand, stuttering ,"Um..."
Kihyun pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes, and let out a deep sigh.
"Get ready, let's go to the workshop. As much as I want to throw you in bed, we need this. You need this. I will buy you lunch on the way. Go, shower."
"Listen, about the workshop-" Yoongi began before he found himself crowded against the door, Kihyun having walked up to him, "No, don't you dare, Yoongi. You are coming. Stop this, you can get through it! It is just a slump. I know you can." His features then got softer as he stepped back and sighed, "I'm sorry. I just..I know how you feel, and I want to be there for you so you don't end up as lost as I felt." Yoongi sighed too, "I know, Hyun. I know you mean well." After a beat of silence , "I'll come to the workshop, don't worry." Kihyun pouted, "If you really don't feel like it, you don't have to come. I know it's me saying two things but we can totally stay back, order in, nap a bit, " he paused, "clean your apartment." He smiled cheekily, "and..."
Yoongi sighed, exasperated, his face turning red, "I will go shower!" He tried to speed walk past Kihyun, but not before receiving a peck to his cheek, due to which he almost tripped. Kihyun laughed ,"I would've joined you if I hadn't already done up my makeup!" he called after his friend's retreating back. He laughed again, before looking around the mess of an apartment. He decided he could do a little sorting of Yoongi's art materials before he was done with the shower. Maybe he seriously should move in with his fellow art major...but then, that wasn't his decision to make alone...
"Okay! They should be arriving soon! Tae, can you get the stools set up for the models? Thank you!" Minseok picked up the box of mini pans of paint, the complementary gifts the small gathering would be getting today. His friend ,Wendy, had recently decided to start a side paint making business with her girlfriend and wanted to give away samples so that word would spread once these talented art students used her paint tins. He looked at the pretty tins with red and white accents, circus themed, titled 'Reveluv Tints'. This production had to have cost a lot. He really hoped their business took off.
"How many models do we have again? Didn't one back out?" Taeyong enquired as he came out of the store room carrying a few stacked up chairs.
"Still three. Moonbin found a replacement last minute," Minseok replied, head bent down, going over his checklist to make sure everything was in place.
"Oh?" Taeyong turned towards Moonbin, raising an eyebrow. Moonbin smiled, stopping in his way to go set up the coffee cups, "Eunwoo got his band mate to agree to fill in. They should be arriving a bit later than when the workshop starts as their football friends are throwing some party right now."
"Wait, wait, wait. You said attend. You never mentioned anything about me stripping!"
"You're not stripping. You are modelling-" Eunwoo tried to placate his friend.
"With no clothes on! Eunwoo, this is a violation of our trust as friends. How could you sell my body-"
"Ugh, stop being a baby ,Kookie! Help him out! I heard one of the models ditched them last moment."
"Easy for you to say, Gyu. You're practically taking off your shirt on stage every performance." Yugyeom decided to help his friend. "You gotta agree, man. You can't just ask someone like Jungkook to suddenly be a model for a whole two hour art class."
"Exactly- wait, what do you mean someone like me?" Jungkook let out, indignant.
"Shy," Yugyeom simply stated.
"I am not shy! I-"
" You got flustered when that random guy tried to return your wallet." Eunwoo and Mingyu burst out laughing. Jungkook spluttered, "Random? That was Jimin! Have you seen him dance? Besides, he came with that mysterious boy, if you have even a little of the taste in art like your boyfriends , you'd see how beautiful that boy was-"
"Taehyung, you mean. Yeah, they're dating."
"Wow. All the hot guys date each other and I am still lonely."
"He's somehow simultaneously narcissistic and unconfident, "Yugyeom stated, "I don't know how he does it."
"Okay, but, someone help out Moonbin. One of you has to be a model."
"Why aren't you modeling?" Jungkook narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms.
"I..have to help out with the materials, and the cafe. They want someone to run the coffee and I happen to know how to work the siphon.."
"Still sounds sus.."
"How?!"
"If Jungkook really doesn't want to, then I'll do it. Let me surprise Wonwoo," Mingyu disrupted what would be an endless drag between the two.
The four of them made their way down the street towards the entry of the small art cafe, close to the campus, a section of which had been rented for the two hours of the workshop. Yugyeom would be heading back to his dorm to sleep. Turns out he had been more tired than he had thought and had apologised to everyone, especially Youngjae ,and his boyfriend, Bambam, for leaving so soon.
"I will come over in an hour," he had said to which Yugyeom had refused, saying that Bambam should stay longer, but Youngjae had then interjected and told them that they should probably make use of the Sunday and get in as much time together before Bambam had to leave for his class trip soon. The International Business majors were going on a field trip overseas just one day after the festival. Yeah, they didn't need to be told twice.
As they entered, the workshop seemed to have just begun, the sketchbooks were still pretty empty. Moonbin and another guy Jungkook recognised to be on the dance team with Jimin were already seated at their stool at the head of the class, in the middle of a loose semi-circle, as the artists sketched them out. Upon noticing their arrival, Moonbin's eyes lit up as Eunwoo gave a tiny wave in his direction, and Minseok seemed relieved. He paused in his talk with one of the students there and excused himself to walk towards them. The student he had been talking to turned around slightly, his hair slipping in front of his eyes, but before Jungkook could see whether he recognised the boy, Minseok was crowding his line of sight.
"Hey! So glad you guys could join in. Eunwoo, you can head on over to the counter there, Hao is there to help you manage the orders." When Eunwoo hesitated for a second, Minseok smiled ,"Once the hour is up Moonbin will be switching with your friend, so don't worry! I'll send him over to take a break at the coffee counter." Minseok was a rather calming and pleasing face to look at, he just emanated a sense of ease around him. Jungkook wondered if Youngjae would like him...
"Jungkook?" Jungkook snapped out of his thoughts.
"Sorry?" He looked between Mingyu and Minseok who were both looking at him, Mingyu amused and Minseok trying to keep himself from smiling.
"Since you won't be modelling, and neither do you have any work assigned, Minseok asked whether you'd like to help him around. See if the students need anything and the sort. "
"Of course, since you aren't officially a part of this workshop and won't be getting paid, you can sit out and observe for most of it, there isn't much work to do, really. I can even give you a sketchpad if you like and a complementary coffee to make up for our lack of funds?" Minseok seemed slightly uneasy, worried that he was asking too much. Well, Jungkook really didn't have anything to do, so he just nodded and agreed.
"Wait, you're getting paid though?" He asked Mingyu as Minseok turned around to grab Jungkook some basic materials. Mingyu winked and stuck out a 'thumbs-up'.
"Yup. I'm the replacement so...Ka-ching!"
"I'm beginning to think you'd actually enjoy becoming a stripper.." said Jungkook to which Mingyu only grinned.
Jungkook shook his head as he saw Mingyu making his way over to his boyfriend, tapping his head, startling the heck out of the poor guy.
Jungkook made his way to the side of the room, closer to the makeshift counter at which Minseok mostly hovered around, a few palettes , brushes, and various other art materials neatly organised on it. He took the small sketchpad Minseok handed him with a small smile, nodding when he told him he could pick up materials from the ones kept to the side. Jungkook picked up a simple graphite pencil and decided to sit a little towards the back of the class. Picking up an unoccupied stool, he made his way, carefully trying to not jostle anyone's easel , and placed it in a relatively small empty space and sat down on it. Jungkook did do some sketching in his free time, sometimes he'd sketch out the moods of his songs, which would later help him remember the feeling to get back into the flow of it. He brushed some experimental strokes on the paper to check out the thickness, adjust the tip, and then looked up, looking around. He could see sheer talent around him as the students drew the dancers that sat at the head , shirtless, wearing loose black pants. Jungkook absentmindedly began drawing the semblance of a figure hunched over an easel, drawing, like the students in the room, not really focusing on any particular person. As he got engrossed in shading, using his thumb to smudge the edge then accidentally leaving a mark due to said blackened thumb when he went to adjust his grip on the sketchbook again, letting out a "Shh-", a voice from the side spoke up.
"Want an eraser, hot shot?" Jungkook looked up, slightly startled, to his right to see the amused expression of someone who he vaguely recognised from the previous year's music fest. When the name clicked, he sat up straighter , eyes going slightly wide, and letting out a whispered exclamation of, "Kihyun!" Kihyun smiled, handing him an eraser, advising a better position to hold the sketchbook in, before he spoke, "Are you staying for long?"
"Yes. Probably till the end? My friend will be modelling later too, so..."
"Ah, I see, I see, that's good," Kihyun's right arm suspiciously jerked suddenly, but Jungkook looked back at his senior's face which was still smiling sweetly at him, maybe a bit too sweet-"let's catch up during the break then," was all he said before turning back to his easel, resuming his detailing.
Jungkook, a bit confused, blinked twice, before his gaze travelled beyond Kihyun to the figure hunched over next to him. The said person was clutching at his side as he then lifted up his head, showing an expression of grimace and irritation directed at Kihyun, who continued to blissfully ignore him. Then his eyes shifted and locked with Jungkook's and he could visibly see this stranger's pale face go paler. He froze, then abruptly sat up, turning slightly away, and resuming his own sketch. Jungkook was now even more confused. Did he know him? Had he said something to him? Fuck, was he the dude he had smashed that one time, drunk out of his mind, at Mingyu's house party? Oh my god, he had no memory of that night. Maybe he had hurt the man-
Yoongi would like to think he was a very stable man. He would like to think that, he knew he wasn't. But he considered himself at least emotionally stable-
"stagnant, Yoongi. You are romantically stagnant," a voice that sounded like Kihyun rang in his head. Basically, he had been pretty uninterested- no, he had been pretty aloof to feeling anything more than whatever he felt for Kihyun (which wasn't exactly romantic...but wasn't platonic either...) for a good while now. The point of this point being made being that, he also didn't like the cliche trope of suddenly finding a muse in the same person he was attracted to...he didn't like the idea, but he did believe that happened. He just didn't expect to be the one experiencing it. Now, he knows he was being dramatic and he had basically created a fantasy in his head in the short span of ten seconds during which he had spotted the boy enter through the door then follow Minseok, and who now sat next to Kihyun. Kihyun had of course spotted his friend's change in demeanour, Yoongi had failed to mask whatever the hell his expression had been, but it was enough for Kihyun to get a mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Is this why we don't move forward? You're into tattooed, long-haired, rock stars? I have to admit, I'm a bit wounded but since he's someone I've met before and had approved of, I won't mind."
To Yoongi's curious look he had replied ,"He sings. He's in that rookie band from last year. The one I said which was almost as good as mine?" That had had the intended effect on Yoongi because those words registered two seconds later and he froze inside again. He remembered that band. He remembered that band and he remembered the singers and he remembered this boy, on stage, playing the bass, overgrown hair slightly covering half his face. Now the faint memory of that tune rang in his head as he looked over at the boy again, and continued to ring even after the frightful interaction Kihyun had had with him next to Yoongi. Frightful because he prayed Kihyun wouldn't drag him into it as Yoongi had pretty much lost his voice on hearing the boy speak. Of course, you wouldn't be able to tell that Yoongi was currently having a whole crisis inside as he was very skilled at hiding that(except from Kihyun, who could just tell) so you would just see him hyper focused on the sketchpad before him, hatching.
And...then, there it comes. That intense feeling, the urge, to draw. Suddenly Yoongi wants to sketch, even though he already was. No, he wanted to map out the boy's face. He wanted to look, to gaze, to focus, to memorise as he studied it, delivering the feeling of his gaze onto paper, pouring the feelings he felt while looking at him in practiced strokes of charcoal. He wanted to push his fringe away so he could look at both of his eyes, shade both of his eyes..the dip in the bow of his lip..such a pretty drawable face, so inviting to look at...in a completely, honestly, non-sexual way. He just wanted to paint the man.
"I think we will break for a short while? Say, twenty minutes!" Minseok clapped once at the head of the class, bringing everybody to attention and snapping Yoongi out of his artistic spiral. The dancers got up and stretched, reaching for their shirts. Yoongi himself stretched his fingers a bit before making to get up and head towards where they were serving coffee but before he could safely escape with his sanity, Kihyun pulled at his elbow, dragging him to his side, and he found himself facing the boy.
"So! How has the band been?"
Yoongi returned home that day, drained out of his mind.
"You should thank me!" Kihyun squawked from his side, entering the apartment after him. Yoongi sighed a sigh that was probably too heavy for someone his age before turning to look at him, expression a deadpan. Kihyun laughed, "okay, okay. Let's nap? Then if you're up for it we can maybe watch something over dinner?" Yoongi nodded, slouching, and making his way around his room towards his bed. Taking off his plain t-shirt and throwing it in the general direction of the hamper, he face planted onto it. He made sure to at least keep his sheets clean and fluffy. If anything, at least his place of rest should be nice. That probably sounded too dark, Yoongi noted, as he turned his head to the side when he felt Kihyun sit down next to him, fully changed into more comfortable wear unlike him. He scooted away to make space and Yoongi rolled over so that he wasn't half hanging off of the bed and settled close to Kihyun, facing him, eyes closed. Kihyun got up slightly to grab at the covers before laying back down, covering them over both of their bodies and then winding his arms around Yoongi, moving to plant a kiss on the top his head, then nestling back onto the pillow underneath.
"Maybe by the end of next week you'll be in the same position but having finished your proje-"
Kihyun let out a cry of pain as Yoongi had kicked his shin under the covers with a , "Goodnight." Kihyun lowly glared before noticing the small smile on his friend's face and smiling in return. He was too fond of this man for his own good.