Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warning:
Fandom:
Relationships:
Characters:
Additional Tags:
Language:
English
Stats:
Published:
2020-09-26
Words:
626
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
8
Kudos:
64
Bookmarks:
1
Hits:
521

Nothing You Can Do

Summary:

Logan writes a letter to Patton, it’s worse than you think.

READ THE TAGS!!!! TRIGGER WARNINGS!!!! THIS FIC GETS REAL DARK!!!! PLEASE BE CAREFUL!!!!

Notes:

PLEASE READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS IF YOU HAVE NOT ALREADY!!!

Sooooo this was supposed to be a cute fluffy fic with Logan writing love letters to Patton, but then I saw this font name (which I used but isn't showing up for AO3) called Nothing You Can Do... so this fic came out. Soooooo yeah, I’m sorry.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Dear Patton,

  Salutations, I hope that you are doing quite well. The last time I saw you, well you seemed upset. I asked you how your dog was doing, you said that she was well. Normally you would go on and on about something seemingly adorable that she had done, but you didn't that time. I assumed that nothing had happened, or you were busy, or that you finally took my advice and stopped talking about something seemingly useless no. Fuck.

  Either way you didn’t talk about your dog. And after that you didn’t really talk at all. I got a little bit nervous because you're the kind of person who can ramble about anything. And yes, I am the same way, I talk about a topic and I cannot stop, but then again I also get quiet. You never get quiet.

  You were quiet, I asked why. You smiled saying how nothing was wrong, I did not believe you. I told you so, and your smile went away, eyes looking down. I asked what was wrong, you tried to resist. I said no. You begged that I didn’t ask, it looked like you were about to cry. But I begged back, mentioning how you were my best friend, and I wanted to know what was going on. I wanted to help you. And you cried.

  You mentioned how you had depression. So many things make more sense now. You mentioned that over the past few months it just seemed to get worse. I should have fucking noticed. I never did this before, but I went to give you a hug, you cried harder, emotions, you mentioned how much you loved me, and wished that things weren't so difficult. I asked if there was any way I could help, and you said “There’s nothing you can do.” And you left.

  You left for good.

  That was November 10th.

  I got the call from your dad on November 14th, saying that the night prior you had died, overdose. I cried. I should’ve seen the signs. I KNOW the signs! We were taught them last year, I should've known. I shouldn't have said some things that I said, I should've done more to help you! Goddammit I could’ve done so much more. Why didn’t I do more?!

  I deeply apologize for every negative thing I have said to you. I’m sorry I didn’t laugh at all your terrible witty puns. I’m sorry that I found your emotions annoying, NO! FUCK! I… I’ve never been good with emotions, as you know, so I didn’t know how to help you. I wish I could’ve helped you.

  But… I cannot change the past, only the future. I know there are things you have wanted me to do, all of us actually. You have always wanted me to make more friends… wait is this why? Because you wanted to kill yourself? I have been talking to Roman and Virgil more, they also both miss you a lot by the way. Roman is trying to become closer to Remus again. Remus has not been so, disturbing I guess you could say, since you have left. He knows how some of his behavior disturbed you. Virgil and De Janus are actually trying to make up. Janus is even trying to lie less, he’s been using his real name more which has been interesting. He knows how much you hated lies.

  The long story short is, we all miss you Patton. You were such a bright in everyone’s lives, even ones you wouldn’t have imagined. Everyone misses you, we all wish we could’ve done more to help you. I miss you.

  I hope you are doing better, wherever you are. I love you.

From,

 Logan

Notes:

If I have missed any tags PLEASE let me know!!! I hope you guys all enjoyed the fic! PLEASE stay safe and stay hydrated, love you all ❤️