Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Shotaro takes off his t-shirt for the tenth time and throws it on the ground. A huge pile of clothes has formed next to the dresser, where he discarded the other outfits he has tried on. A line of sweat is building on his top lip, the nerves finally getting the best of him. He reaches into the drawer and pulls out an old black t-shirt. He looks at it for a minute.

This is what he wore the day he auditioned, it would be only fitting to wear it today too. Who knows? This t-shirt might come back with another huge achievement under its name. So he throws it on and shakes his head to straighten out his messy hair. It’s still damp, but it’ll be dry by the time he makes it to the company.

Meanwhile, in front of the apartment complex, Ava is wiping her sweaty palms off her black jeans. Three deep breaths in, three long breaths out. Just stay focused, they don’t have a reason not to hire you, she thinks trying to calm herself down. She isn’t usually this nervous, but when it comes to interviews, something in her snaps and all her anxiety comes bubbling up.

This is a very important day for her and she can’t afford to mess up. She takes another deep breath in and smells a hint of summer rain. The smell of hot cement in the distance being hit by the cool raindrops hangs in the air faintly. Hopefully, it’ll stay away long enough for her to get back home afterwards.

Shotaro follows Sungchan and Taeyong down the stairs, the latter being in charge of getting them to the company today. He thought it’d be nice to be the one to bring them and no one had any objections. Taeyong steps out and shouts back for them to hurry, because the weather might turn any minute.

Shotaro steps onto the pavement last. He pauses and looks up at the cloudy sky with hopeful eyes. He allows himself to hope that the outcome today will be spectacular and dares to smile up at the sky as a single drop of water falls onto his cheek. Taeyong shouts his name to come in the car and he snaps out of it.

Ava shakes her head and exhales one last time, before taking a step towards the convenience store in front of her.

Had either of them been a little less focused on their goals in that moment, then their gazes might’ve met. But they both stride straight ahead, their eyes focused ahead.

Their eyes almost meet, but they don’t. Their shoulders almost brush, but they don’t. Their lives stay untangled for another little while.

Chapter Text

Ava is stocking up the fridge shelves with various soft drinks and food items. Today is her first day and her manager is keeping a close eye on her. Sam, her 34-year-old manager, has made a whole schedule for her, so he doesn’t ever have to cover the nightshift with her again. He says nights are for sleeping, only poor students stay up late. He isn’t wrong. Ava needs the money badly to keep herself afloat through college and so far, the nightshift hasn’t been too bad.

Sam threw the discount gun at her, expecting her to know what to do. She spent the first hour of her shift just staring at it, until he eventually decided to actually explain it to her. Muttering something about new starts being useless and how much he hates being stuck training them. You could say, it has been a very pleasant first three hours.

On the plus side, Sam let her put aside some of the foods going out of date today, for her midnight snack.

“I need to go to the bathroom, can you stay at the till until I come back?” Sam asks, but it sounds a lot more like an order.

Ava just nods and gets up from her position on the floor. Sam is gone before she can even wipe the dust off her jeans. She rolls her eyes.

“I’d be better off teaching myself anyway…” She mumbles under her breath and steps over to the register.

She looks out onto the dark road, lit up only by a couple of streetlights and smiles. Compared to her usual crazy days at university, she enjoys the quiet. It’s only midnight, so she is expecting some more waves of customers looking for more beer or some snacks for their small gathering. Maybe even a couple of people craving instant meals, but until then she takes in the silence and exhales fully, letting her whole body relax.

She closes her eyes and yawns. The first of many nightshifts to go, but just think about the food you’ll be able to afford now. No more instant food every day, an actual pizza or an actual trip to the restaurant without getting the cheapest thing on the menu. She smiles, keeping her eyes closed a little longer.

Outside, a customer is pacing back and forth in front of the store. He is wearing a black baseball hat and a big dark green parka jacket. Ava doesn’t notice, too engulfed in her little happy bubble, the radio now playing one of her favourite songs.

The man comes up the steps after making up his mind and opens the door almost violently. He manages to catch it before it can slam against the counter behind it. Ava opens her eyes, surprised by the abrupt noise and jumps back. She meets the eyes of this very handsome customer and scans him top to bottom.

“Sorry.” He mutters and closes the door behind him slowly. He walks over to the fridge and looks at the drinks available.
Ava isn’t sure what to make of this guy. She sits back down on her little stool and keeps a watchful eye on him, but whenever he looks back at her, a shudder goes through her body and she looks away quickly. She glances up at the CCTV to check that it is working and recording, just in case. The little red light puts her mind at ease a little.

She frowns at his choice of outfit. It’s summer and despite being close to 1AM, it is by no means cold out. Why would this man need a parka? Ava tries to stop reading too much into it and focuses her eyes on the register, a sudden fear entering her mind about her lack of knowledge of it. Hopefully, Sam will be back before this customer checks out.

Ava anxiously looks to the staff room door to her right, but it stays shut. The customer continues his way through the isles and eventually settles for a couple of cans of beer and a bag of crisps. Just as he puts the items down in front of her, she hears the doorknob turn and Sam step out. Ava looks over to him with a grateful expression, but only receives an eye roll back.

“Is that all for you?” Sam asks and steps up next to Ava.

“Yes.” The customer replies very quietly and pushes the items towards them more.

Sam holds out his hand and points to the register. Ava points to herself in shock and whispers to him: “You haven’t showed me yet…”

“The best way for a baby to learn to swim, is to just throw them in.” Sam responds and winks, before returning his facial features to an annoyed look.

Ava smile uncomfortably and nods. She turns to the register, grabs the scanner and gets started on the purchase. Everything seems to be going fine, until she presses the finish button. The screen freezes and Ava shrieks.

“I think I broke it!” She exclaims worriedly. “What do I do?”

Sam sighs and turns to the customer. “Please excuse my colleague, this is her first shift.” The customer nods, but doesn’t look up to meet Sam’s gaze. “This happens sometimes-“ Sam continues directed at Ava. “-so you just gotta wait a couple of seconds and then if that doesn’t work, you hit the side of it. Like this.” Sam slaps the computer from the side and it jumps to the next step.

Ava’s eyes widen in surprise. That actually worked? I guess violence is the answer to a grumpy till. The customer jumps back at the sound, both Ava and Sam too engrossed in their fight with the register to notice his nervousness.

“Would you like to pay by card or cash?” Ava asks.

The customer runs off quickly after paying, leaving Ava and Sam in an awkward silence. Thankfully, the radio is still going or else they would really just hear each other breathe.

“You should clean the coffee machine and the microwave on nightshift. You can do that now, since there aren’t any customers.” Sam shouts from the front of the shop, his feet propped up under the counter. He is leaning back on the stool with a magazine in hand. Even the way he chews gum is irritable, Ava looks away.

Walking on the poorly lit street, Sungchan and Shotaro are making their way home from a long day at the company. They were sent home early today, to get some extra sleep before the official recording sessions start tomorrow. Shotaro wanted to stay longer and work some more on the choreography, but the managers were having none of it. Plus, a good night’s rest works wonders on the mind before a tough couple of weeks. Whoever said debuting was easy?

“I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep yet…” Sungchan complains, kicking a rock on the ground.

“Me neither...” Shotaro responds quietly.

“We could play some video games until we feel tired?” Sungchan suggests, his eyes now big with excitement. They never have the time to play video games anymore. Their console must be getting rusty and feel really neglected.

“Should we?” Shotaro mirrors his expression, slowly getting hyped up at the thought of their room drowned in darkness and only illuminated by the screen.

“We’ll need some snacks!” Sungchan exclaims and points to the 7-Eleven at the end of the road. “Come on!”

He starts jogging the rest of the way towards the shop, leaving Shotaro behind chuckling to himself. The latter follows and picks up his pace to catch up. The light coming from the store blinds him a little. The contrast between the poorly lit street and the full wall of windows from the 7-Eleven makes it a bit difficult for him to see as he steps in the door after his friend.

“Welcome.” Sam says with a bored tone and without looking up from his magazine, but both Sungchan and Shotaro nod their heads in his direction.

“What do you wanna get?” Sungchan asks cheerfully. “I think I want some choco-pie.”

“Are we allowed to eat those?” Shotaro asks shyly.

“No. But you won’t rat me out right?” He laughs, thinking Shotaro is joking and completely misreading his tone. Instead of letting him know he is genuinely worried, Shotaro just laughs along and shakes his head.

Sungchan leans down to the cakes and looks over his selection, leaving Shotaro to wander around and find what he wants to buy. He turns to overview the whole store and notices Ava cleaning the microwave thoroughly. She is scrubbing away and humming the song playing in the background. He doesn’t even realise his feet are moving in her direction, until he is standing right next to her.
Sungchan pulls out his treasured snacks and turns to show Shotaro, but finds no one there. He jumps up and looks over the shelves to find him.

Ava sticks her head out of the microwave, when she sees someone’s feet standing next to her. She brings her gaze up to meet his and nods at him in greeting.

“I’m sorry. If you want to use the microwave, you’ll need to wait another five minutes. I’m almost done.” She reassures him and turns back to cleaning.

Sungchan is holding in a laugh behind them, seeing his friend unable to say a word. Instead, Shotaro just nods in agreement and turns around. When he makes his way back to Sungchan, the latter chuckles at him.

“You’re so cute, man.” He whispers and puts his arm around his friend’s shoulder. “I told you to get a snack and you try to get a girl.”

Shotaro chuckles and looks back over his shoulder, to see Ava already looking at him. She smiles but quickly looks away, a blush forming on her cheeks. He smiles back, unable to hold it in and turns away. He grabs the first thing he can form the shelf next to him and puts it down next to the choco-pie.

“My treat.” He exclaims and hands Sam his card. Sungchan gives him a satisfied thumbs-up.

Chapter Text

With the midterms just around the corner, right now might not have been the best time to get a part time job. But Ava has no regrets. The first pay check she got last week is so worth the long nights. Now, she just has to make sure her grades don’t slip or else her parents will find out something is up.

Her parents aren’t rich, but they get by. She knows that they send her more money than they can afford, but every time she brings up getting a job, they immediately shut her down. If it didn’t come from a place of love, she would rebel against it. Getting a job in secret is the only way. This way she can save up a huge part of the sum they send her and eventually give it back to them or use it to buy more important things.

She has read over this chapter three times now already. Whenever she gets to the end of it, a new customer comes in and then she forgets how far into it she’s already read. At least she will know exactly what this chapter is about at the exam.

Sam clocked out the second she got here and barely muttered a goodbye before leaving. Part of her wishes he would stay sometimes, just to fill her in on the notice board notes, but on the other hand, she’s glad he goes, because he is very unpleasant. So, instead she spends the first five minutes of her shift reading up on the notice board then makes herself a coffee before cleaning the machine.

She managed to get a little routine going. She checks the clock, for the third time already. It’s not even 1AM yet. Why can’t time move faster? She sighs and goes back to studying. The door opens and Ava sits up straighter. Her eyes showing her excitement at the prospect of her favourite customers, but she is quickly disappointment when the same off customer in his parka jacket walks in.

This guy comes in every single night. Sometimes at 10PM and sometimes at 3AM, but he always looks around suspiciously and drops his items on the counter with shaking hands. Ava doesn’t really vibe with this guy, but she doesn’t want to judge him should it be more than just a dodgy personality. So, she stays polite and rings his items up without a word.

Tonight though, he looks up from under his baseball hat, straight into her eyes. It’s only brief but it throws her off. His gaze is so intense, that she really wants to take a step back. She has never seen such a dark shade of brown, almost black, in someone’s eyes before.

He quickly picks up his bag and leaves quietly. Always just nodding his head goodbye and never actually speaking to her. Maybe he’s just shy. A bit creepy, but just shy.

Ava tries to shake off the uneasiness and decides it’s time to clean the microwave. Maybe she’ll be able to focus on that instead of the shudder that just went down her back. She checks the time one last time, before heading away from the register, only to be disappointed again. Can 2AM come faster please?

Anyway, she turns up the radio a tiny bit and makes her way to the other side of the shop. As soon as she starts cleaning, she begins humming the song that’s playing. Before she knows it, the memory of that strange encounter is old history and she uses the spray bottle as a microphone to sing along. At one point she even whistles and when one whistles, life can’t be that bad.

The door opens as she is drying the microwave. She turns around surprised at the sudden noise and stops in her tracks. Her favourite customer has arrived. Not knowing his name, she just started calling him Dumpling, because he always buys either dumplings or sushi and Dumpling just sounds nicer.

He has his back to her and stretches his neck to see behind the counter, but he can’t see her there. He frowns and looks over the shelves, maybe she is stocking up somewhere, but again she is nowhere to be seen. Finally, he turns around. She’s still staring at him when he faces her and smiles brightly. It is the kind of smile that can light up the world and make the rain go away. A smile that reaches his eyes and lifts up your mood in an instant. She immediately smiles back.

“Welcome again.” She nods and puts down her supplies, before making her way back over to the register. “What are you getting today? Sushi?” She asks, fully expecting him not to respond. It’s not that he is rude, he just seems extremely shy, so she doesn’t read too much into it or take it too personally.

He moves over to the microwave and points at the open door.

“Can I use it?” He asks shyly, but still smiling as if nothing is wrong in the world.

Something inside Ava just died a little bit. His voice sound so quiet and smooth, she wants to melt into a puddle. From the way he smiles, to the shade of blonde in his hair. It feels like someone is continuously stabbing her heart when he isn’t looking at her. What a strange thing to feel for a complete stranger.

“I just cleaned it. Go ahead.” She answers. “Let me know if you need any help.”

She steps back behind the register and sits down. She gets back to studying to distract her thoughts from the pretty man who just came in and is using her microwave. Her microwave? She really is going way overboard.

Shotaro is looking at the ramen selection, but he can’t choose. He just wants to turn around and stare at her a little bit more, before he has to go home. He told Sungchan he’s just going to buy some food, so he can’t be back too late. His excuse is so lame, he’s sure Sungchan knows all about his little crush on Ava. He even made fun of him when Shotaro said he knew her name…

“I guess you stared at her so long, you read her name tag.” Sungchan had said before laughing and calling him cute.

He can’t decide which one to choose, so he turns to ask her her favourite, but she seems engrossed in whatever it is she is reading. He doesn’t want to interrupt her. He just wants to look at her with that little frown on her forehead as she takes in every word on the page. At least he won’t need to be prepared to look away quickly, since she doesn’t seem to notice him staring at all. So he quietly turns back and just picks the first thing he sees that sounds nice.

He pours water in the cup and puts it in the microwave on the recommended settings and timer. He watches it turn on the little disk and waits patiently for it to beat.

Ava picks up her pen and starts writing notes on her book. This time she knows exactly what she is reading. Somehow she feels completely comfortable, more so than when she was alone, as there is always a specific kind of dread when she is by herself. She never knows what type of customer might come in next and at what moment. So even when she is focused, she can’t really afford to not be vigilant.

Right now though, she feels like she can dedicate her full attention to her revisions. His aura just seems trusting. Of course she could be completely wrong and he could rob the place without her even realising, but she doubts it. Plus, she knows where he lives and she knows what his friend looks like.

The microwave beats, but Ava doesn’t really notice. It has become a background noise. Shotaro quickly takes it out of the microwave, forgetting that the cup will be hot. He drops it as soon as he picks it up, splashing it all over the floor and burning his fingers slightly. He shakes his hands in pain and tries to dry them off on his jacket.

Ava looks up at his shriek and jumps up to help him. She hurries over and takes his hands in hers to look at the burn.

“Come on, you can use the staff bathroom to run cold water over your hands.” Ava leads him to the staff door and points to the bathroom. “I can’t come, sorry. I have to stay in the store, but take your time.” She gives him a reassuring smile and waits until he steps into the bathroom and closes the door.

She goes back to the back to clean up. She was finally in a good study flow and he just had to drop his ramen then and there. She shakes her head, but instead of getting mad she just picks up the cup and sets it aside. She grabs the paper towel roll and gathers as many of the noodles as possible. She then drops them back in the cup and throws it in the bin.

She takes a hold of the mop and bucket, that she keeps under the register in case things like these happen, and fills it with hot water from the kettle. Just as she sprays some of the cleaning soap in the bucket, Shotaro comes back from the bathroom, still blowing air on his fingers.

“Are you okay?” Ava asks with a concerned expression on her face. He just smiles.

“It’s not that bad. I think it was just in the moment…” He answers and tries to take the mop from her. “Let me clean it up, I made the mess.”

“No, it’s okay. This happens sometimes.” She keeps her grip on the mop, but so does Shotaro. “Seriously, it’s no big deal. This is my job.”
“It’s not your job to clean up after me.” He counters, his forehead wrinkling slightly. He pulls slightly harder and she lets go.

“Fine.” Ava gives in and steps over the small puddle of ramen soup. “Which one did you choose anyway? It smells horrible.”

“I have no idea. I grabbed a random one.” He responds and gets to work soaking up the mess he made.

“Maybe that’s for the better then.” Ava jokes and laughs. He joins in and rings out the mop on the bucket.

“What were you reading?” Shotaro finds himself asking out of the blue. For a second, he isn’t sure if he actually spoke the words or if he only thought them.

“Just studying over some notes I took.” She responds. So he did ask it out loud. “I have exams next week and this is the only time I can really study in peace.”

Shotaro gets the last of it and puts the mop down against the small table. He goes to pick up the bucket, but Ava takes it away from him.

“I’ll get rid of that.” Before he can object she runs off to the staff bit. “Please keep watch for a second.” She shouts back, making him chuckle.

She really does trust him with more than she should. She doesn’t even know his name… She tries to empty the bucket too quickly, and splashes some of it on her uniform, which just consists of a bright green vest. She swears under her breath and tries to rub it with some soap, but the stain doesn’t go out. She’ll have to hide it from her boss in the morning…

She comes back swiftly and finds him looking at her notes.

“You study languages?” Shotaro asks curiously, already impressed with her just for the fact she is trying to speak a whole other language.

“Yeah, I wanna be a translator for some big company someday. But first, I have to pass my exams to even make it to the next year.” She jokes and takes the notes off him. She steps behind the register, now only the counter width separating them. Her eyes narrow as she watches him take out his wallet.

“How much for the ramen?” He asks.

“Don’t even bother, I can’t charge you for it.”

“I took it and used it, so I should pay.” Shotaro insists and holds out the lid he had ripped off before putting it in the microwave. Ava takes it hesitantly, but she guesses her boss wouldn’t like her giving it away for free… If only she could just give it to him though. He didn’t even get to eat it.

“For the record, I don’t want to charge you.” She repeats and scans the barcode.

“I know. Don’t worry, Ava.” Shotaro says without realising. He looks down at his wallet and bites his lips. Why did he have to say her name?

“You know my name?” Ava asks surprised.

Shotaro just points at her name tag and Ava nods, not thinking much more of it, but Shotaro’s cheeks have turned bright pink.

“Well, then it’s only fair for you to tell me your name also.” Ava demands with a grin. Shotaro looks up eagerly and returns her smile immediately.

“Shotaro. But my friends call me Taro.”

Ava sticks out her hand for him to shake.

Chapter Text

Shotaro has a longer lunch break and he picked up some cupcakes from the bakery near the company for them to eat together. So he decides to head over to the convenience store, telling the other members he is going to run home and pick up a change of clothes. But when he gets to the store, she isn’t there.

“She only works nightshift.” The store owner said to him, when he wounded up the nerve to actually ask.

He’s now standing in front of the store unsure what to do. These cupcakes need to be in a fridge if he wants them to still taste good by the time her nightshift starts and leaving them in the dorm fridge is not an option. Sungchang or another trainee will definitely eat them before he can take them back. He needs to think fast.

He could take them back to the practice room and ask the staff to put them in the staff room fridge, but then they might ask questions about his dieting and he really doesn’t want to cause them any inconvenience either. He shouldn’t raise suspicions about how serious he is taking this debut. He already decided on exercising an extra hour tomorrow for eating the cupcake today, but they wouldn’t know that. All they would see is sugar and carbs.

So, Shotaro is still none the wiser about his cupcake dilemma. He sits down on the curb for a second to think. He just wants to give Ava a cupcake, why is it proving to be so difficult?

He looks back at the store and watches the owner ring up another customer with a smile. That’s when he has a light-bulb moment.

“Excuse me?” Shotaro asks shyly standing in front of the register.

“How can I help you?” The owner asks with a friendly tone. Maybe this will could work, Shotaro thinks.

“I bought these for Ava, could you give them to her when she comes in?” He asks avoiding eye contact. “I can’t keep them in a fridge until tonight, maybe you could.”

Shotaro has no hope that this will work, but at least it’s a better idea than keeping them in the dorm fridge. The worst the owner can do is say no. The owner chuckles and grabs onto the little holder on the cupcake box.

“Sure thing.” He responds and walks over the drink fridge. He reaches up to take out a box lying on the top shelf. “I’ll put it here. When you come by later, you can just take it out and give it to her yourself.” The old man shows him exactly how he pushes the box back into the corner. “Alright?”

“Yes, thank you so much!” Shotaro smiles and checks the clock hanging on the wall.

His eyes widen. He’s going to be late. Hopefully, someone else will be later than him so he won’t get scolded as much.
“I really need to go. But thank you again!” He nods at the old man again and basically runs out of the store.

“Young love…” The old man mutters to himself with a sweet smile.

Ava isn’t sure why her parents came all the way to the city to have dinner with her, but she needs to make sure she is out of here by 9:30PM. Any later and she won’t be able to run home to grab her uniform and then her boss will tell her off. She already owes the man a lot for letting her study on the job, she can’t push it and become a nuisance too. She’ll work hard and earn her money well.

But all that without her parents knowing. They are already ten minutes late to the restaurant. Her dad hates pasta, she has no idea why they suggested an Italian restaurant in the first place. She checks her phone for the time.

“Kids these days, always on their phones.” Her dad says with a chuckle. “There’s a whole world in front of your eyes, but you need to look at a virtual one.”

Ava rolls her eyes. The same old comments once again. She’s so over it, but she indulges it. “Dad. Hey!” She gets up and gives him a tight hug. She hadn’t realised how much she misses them until they were standing right in front of her. Maybe dinner wasn’t the worst thing.

“Where’s mom?” She asks.

“Bathroom. You know how she is.” He jokes again and takes a seat.

Dinner goes well. They talk about her studying and her exams that are coming up the following day. Her parents reveal that they invited her for dinner, because they know how she is when she has an exam the next day. They were worried she’d be all cooped up in her room all night studying until her eyes are bloodshot. So they wanted to make sure she at least gets some food, before she puts her nose back in her book. If only they knew, that she will be spending all night studying, but not where they think. She just laughs along when they laugh and listens when they speak.

Once the bill is brought over, she begins tapping her foot on the ground.

“Do you want to go for some ice cream before we go?” Her mother asks and reaches over to take her hand.

“No it’s ok. I really should get back to studying.” Ava pushes up from the table and puts her backpack on. Her phone screen lights up with a message from Boss. Before she can turn it over, her dad squints his eyes at it. Did he see it? He must’ve seen it right? She thinks to herself, sweat already forming on her forehead.

“Baby, did you get a job?” Her dad asks with a frown. Both her parents are now looking at her expectantly and her brain is running at god’s speed trying to come up with an excuse.

“No, of course not. You guys were very clear about focusing.” Ava says, trying to make her voice sound as stable as possible. “We have this group project and one of the other students is in charge of our team, so I named them boss in my phone.”

Her mom raises an eyebrow, unsure whether to believe her, but Ava gives her most Oscar worthy smile and puts her phone in her pocket.

“Are you guys gonna take me home or what?” She knows very well that she’ll be late if her parents take her home, but right now not blowing her cover is more important. Her boss will hopefully understand.

Ava rushes through the door at the shop ready to say a hundred apologies, but the old man just hands her a strawberry milk and punches the straw through the top.

“It seems you’ve had a hard day.” He says and goes to the back without another word. He knows something must be up when his most reliable employee is late.

Ava is flabbergasted at the lack of scolding. She was fully ready to defend herself and beg to keep her job, but now she doesn’t have to. She lets out a sigh of relief and takes a sip of her strawberry milk, before heading over to the register.

The owner comes back out of the staff room, his vest now in his hand and a bag slung over his shoulder.

“I already cleaned the appliances, so just focus on studying and making sure nothing gets stolen.” He says before stepping out the front door. Ava is so incredibly grateful to him for not going off on her. She’d been so stressed and worried about her parents coming to visit, that she couldn’t take any more negativity today.

As the night goes on, nothing out of the ordinary happens. She rings up the creepy man and watches him carefully until he is out of sight. She’ll never get used to his icy look and the way a single glance caused the hair on her body to rise up. She shakes her head, a shudder going down her body just thinking about it. She needs to study anyway, so she turns the radio up a little more to drown out any distracting thoughts.

Shotaro and Sungchang are escorted by Taeyong tonight. He wanted to make sure they get home well before their music video shoot tomorrow.

“And don’t play video games until late today. You need all the sleep you can get, whenever there’s an opening.” Taeyong instructs them as they walk past the convenience store. “Once you debut, sleep becomes a luxury.” He adds sadly, before petting Sungchang on the back.

Shotaro tries to sneak a peek at Ava sitting behind the register, but can’t do so without obviously turning his head and he doesn’t want to be caught by his leader. But Taeyong stops at the entrance and points to the door.

“Anything you guys need before I go?”

Sungchan and Shotaro look at each other, but neither can think of anything right now. So they just shake their heads.

“We’ll be okay.” Sungchan responds.

“Alright, then head in. I’ll leave when you’re gone.”

Ava lifts her head at the faint sound of voices outside. She sees Shotaro and immediately smiles brightly. She waits to see if he looks in her direction, but his eyes stay on the guy in front of them. She can’t say she’s seen that one before, maybe he doesn’t live with them.

“Get home safe.” Shotaro adds before him and Sungchan head into their building.

Taeyong waits a couple of seconds and turns around, locking eyes with Ava, who immediately looks away. Unsure if she recognized him, Taeyong pulls up his mask and heads off, back the same way he came.

Ava bites her lip in disappointment. Looks like he isn’t coming by tonight… She tries to hide the sadness and continues on reading her notes. The exam is tomorrow and she has no choice but to focus. She can’t mess up or her parents will definitely question what she’s doing with her free time. Ava picks up the third strawberry milk she’s drinking and takes another sip, when the door opens.

Taeyong reaches into his pocket and touches the two lucky charms he had bought for his newest members. He curses himself for forgetting and turns around again. He starts jogging down the road and takes out his phone to call Sungchan. As he goes through his contacts, he stops in his tracks in front of the convenience store.

Inside, Shotaro is reaching up to the box in the fridge marked “staff only”. He takes out his cupcake box and puts the box back. His eye smile graces his face as he heads back over to the register, where Ava is excitedly smiling back at him.

Taeyong isn’t sure what exactly he is watching, but it doesn’t look that innocent to him. Should he go in and confront him? He’s not actually ever had this type of problem with a member before, he doesn’t know how to deal with it.

Shotaro takes out one of the cupcakes and hands it over to Ava. He reaches in his pocket and pulls out a single candle, which he then places in the middle of the frosting. He lights it with the matches he stole from another trainee and grins at her.

“Make a wish.” He says and nods to the candle.

Ava looks down at her notes, slightly worried about the exam the next day, but right now most other emotions have evaporated and she only the happiness from being on the other end of that smile fills her heart. She closes her eyes and wishes hard for an easy exam paper. Shotaro too makes a wish and when she blows out the candle, she could’ve sworn that he did it too.

Chapter Text

Ava is really struggling to keep her eyes open tonight. After spending day and night studying for her exams, her body is exhausted to a max. She even forgot to wash her face after her shift the night before.

Thankfully, she has a couple of weeks off from university soon and then she can sleep full eight hours during the day again. But for now, she only gets two hours before classes and maybe another two to three hours later if she’s lucky. She’s young though, she can do it. It’s not forever. As long as her grades stay up and her parents don’t know what she’s been up to, all is well.

Plus, every night, she gets to spend a couple of minutes with Shotaro and that makes it alright. It’s almost midnight when Ava fails to open her in eyes again after resting them just for a few minutes. She is resting her head on her crossed arms on the counter, in a weird state between sleep and wakefulness. Her brain still registers the music from the speakers, but it’s being pulled away further and further into dreamland.

If he hadn’t accidently knocked his foot against the fridge and made a couple of cans crash to the floor and burst, then she probably wouldn’t have woken up to catch him. But the parka wearing customer doesn’t seem to be stealthy enough for that.

Ava jumps up at the sudden noise and searches for the source immediately, her hand already on the mop underneath the counter, ready to fight if necessary. Her eyes meet those icy cold ones she so strongly dislikes. Next to her the cash register is open and empty.

“Hey!” She shouts at him and grabs the mop, but before she can step around the register he’s already running across the store and pushes past her out the door.

Ava stumbles back at the impact and hits her head off the window, before sliding to the ground. Her hand reaches to the back of her head where she can already feel a bump growing and she groans in pain. What she doesn’t expect is that her fingers start feeling wet from the touch. She also doesn’t expect to see blood on them when she holds them up to her face.

“Blood…?” She asks herself in shock. She stands up too quickly and immediately stumbles into the shelf next to her. She steadies herself and slowly makes her way over to the register, where her phone is sitting on the counter.

When the police get there, they immediately call an ambulance. She didn’t have the energy to make that call too and she surely didn’t manage to pay enough attention when the police officer scolded her for calling them before calling an ambulance. Something about her health coming before the items stolen from the store. Normally she would agree, but her brain is a little foggy.

The nice police officer takes out a clean cloth tissue from his pocket and starts pressing it against the back of her head. She’s sitting on the curb outside, while the officers check the CCTV with the owner inside.

The old man comes outside and puts his jacket around her shoulders. He leans down to be at eye level with her.

“Are you okay?” He asks her gently, unsure how lucid she is right now.

“I’m so sorry, boss. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” She immediately apologies and tears shoot to her eyes. He takes a hold of her hands and chuckles sadly. “I just closed my eyes for a second, I swear.”

“Ava. It’s okay, he didn’t take much and there isn’t any damage in the store.” The old man takes a look at the bloody cloth in the officer’s hand and frowns. “You know we don’t keep much money in the register at night. Is the ambulance coming?” He asks the officer.

“Should only be a couple of minutes.” The officer responds politely.

“Are you cold?” The old man asks, but Ava shakes her head. The movement makes her wince in pain.

“Are you her guardian?” The officer asks but Ava nods her head, again wincing in pain at the movement. But her parents can’t be contacted about this.

Another officer steps up into the doorway and calls the owner back in to add the password into the CCTV folder again. He promises Ava to be back as soon as possible, before following the lady inside. Ava reaches for the cloth against her head and asks the officer to leave her alone for a bit. After seeing the tears slowly rolling down her face, he agrees but doesn’t step too far away.

Shotaro is coming back from the music video shoot in a great mood. The atmosphere in the van on their way home is ecstatic, they are all laughing and hyped up. It’s almost 4AM, but they could all stay up for another full 20 hours. Taeyong and Jaehyun are praising the new guys on their performance today and have invited themselves for a little afterparty.

“How about some ramen?” Shotaro asks more hyper than usual.

“OK! Ramen for Shotaro, but you’ll need to do some extra work tomorrow!” Taeyong exclaims and Shotaro nods right away. Their list of snacks and drinks has gotten pretty long, neither of them can wait to change out of their outfits and sit down in front of a game of Fifa.

As the van pulls up to their apartment complex, the blue and red light reflects in their windows.

“What’s going on there?” Taeyong asks and leans forward between the driver’s and passenger’s seat. The driver slows down and Taeyong sees the police officers walking in and out of the store, but it’s Shotaro who spots Ava sitting on the floor by herself.

“Is that blood?” He asks quietly, not really directed at anyone but himself, but Taeyong follows his gaze and gasps.
“It looks like it.”

“What’s going on?” Jaehyun asks from the back curiously, as the van comes to a halt a couple of meters down from the scene.

Shotaro throws the door open and jumps out, his face full of worry, but he stops himself from taking a step towards her. Suddenly, all the awareness comes crashing down on him. He can’t go to her when all the members are here. His feet feel frozen against the pavement and he can’t even move his gaze from her.

Jaehyun comes rushing out to check out the scene, followed by Sungchan and Taeyong. Since it’s 4AM, no crowd has gathered around the police cars, but Taeyong can’t take any risks. A picture of any of them near this would be bad.

“You guys go in.” He gently pushes Sungchan and Jaehyun towards the front door. “You don’t know who’s watching.” They do as they are told, but not without stretching their necks to check out the girl sitting on the floor.

“I hope she’s okay.” Sungchan says before they disappear in the building.

Taeyong feels sorry for Shotaro, but no matter how much he thinks about a solution, he doesn’t see any way for him to stay out here. So, Taeyong steps back into the van and tells the driver to drive up a little further so he is covering the girl from most curious onlookers.

He steps back out and closes the door, before the van starts rolling forward. He reaches in his pocket and takes out a black mask.

“Here. Put this on.” Taeyong instructs his friend, but Shotaro isn’t listening. “Hey, Taro.” He snaps his fingers in front of Shotaro’s eyes.

“What?” He finally snaps out of it.

“Put this on.” He does as he is told. Then Taeyong takes off his baseball hat and places it on Shotaro’s head. “Give me your bag.” Again, without hesitation he does as he is told and hands over his bag to Taeyong. “Listen carefully, you have exactly 10 minutes, before the driver’s shift is over. Then he will leave and everyone will have a clear view of you. You get me?”

Shotaro isn’t entirely sure what Taeyong means, but he gets the gist of it. He has ten minutes before he should be back in his apartment with the rest of the members. So he nods. Taeyong licks his lips nervously.

“Try not to attract attention.” He pets his friend’s shoulder before heading for the front door. He looks back once, but Shotaro is already rushing down the road to her. “Idiot.” He mumbles, before opening the door.

Shotaro almost immediately crashing to the ground next to Ava.

“Are you okay?” His voice takes on a tone she had never heard him use before. It’s suddenly a lot lower, but she recognizes it immediately.

Without looking at him, she wraps her arms around his shoulders and continues crying. Only now does he notice the amount of blood on the cloth and he immediately reaches for it.

“It’s all my fault, Taro. My fault…” She sobs into his shoulder, having a hard time catching a breath. He shushes her and tries his best to hug her tightly without attracting too much attention.

“What happened?” He finally asks. Five minutes are almost up and he really wants to know if she’ll be okay, before he has to go up.

“I fell asleep.” She responds and pushes off him. Her face is flushed and her eyes are puffy from the crying. The circles under eyes are darker tonight than they were before, but what can you expect of a serious student? “I fell asleep…” She repeats and almost bursts into tears again. “And… And this weird guy robs the place. I tried to fight him off but then he pushed me back…” She reveals.

Something in Shotaro makes him want to find the guy and make him pay for what he did. If only he could do anything that would help her right now. Then something comes to mind and his eyes almost light up.

“Wait here a second.” He says and looks to the officer behind her, who had been keeping a close eye on them. He nods, letting Shotaro know that he’ll continue watching her until he’s back.

So he rushes in the store and runs straight to the freezer. He grabs an ice lolly and fumbles through his pocket for some change. The owner steps up next to him and puts his hand on Shotaro’s.

“Just take it. She needs it tonight.” The owner smiles at him kindly and Shotaro doesn’t think twice, before heading back out. He glances at the clock before stepping out. 1-minute left.

“Here.” He holds out the ice lolly after opening it, the sound of an ambulance coming closer. “Eat this okay? It’ll make you feel a little better.”

Behind them the old man comes out and steps up behind them. Ava looks at Shotaro with teary eyes unable to verbally thank him. But she starts eating away, hoping that he’ll understand how grateful she is to him from that. The driver starts the car up again, and begins backing away, waving goodbye to Shotaro who just nods at him.

“I have to go now.” He tells her and her eyes turn sad. She bites her lip. “I know, I’m sorry. But I’ll come check on you tomorrow. I’ll check every day until you’re back. I promise.”

He pulls her in for a quick side hug, before getting up and glancing at the officer then the old man. They both smile at him reassuringly.

The ambulance arrives right as Shotaro confirms the door code. He looks back one last time only to find her staring after him with those sad puppy eyes. He really wants to go back, but his time is up.

Chapter Text

Her head still hurts a little when she gets back to work a couple of days later. Her boss had told her to stay home as long as she needs and he will have Sam cover her shifts, but Ava doesn’t like being a burden to him. She is already thankful that he agreed to coming to the hospital with her so her parents wouldn’t find out. She can’t ask more of him, even if he offers.

Thankfully, she only missed a day at university. There’s no way they would call her parents when her attendance is perfect other than that. She even called him as soon as she woke up the next day to tell them she’s sick. If her mom found out she was sick, she’d come down or send her dad with a huge care package.

A little bit of guilt flushes through her body and she has to stop herself from thinking about deceiving her parents and going against their wishes. What they don’t know can’t hurt them… She sighs and leans her head on her folded arms against the wall in the staff room. That’s not a tonight problem, she thinks. It’ll be a maybe later problem if her parents ever find out.

Shotaro has been worried about her. He doesn’t have her number, he doesn’t know her address either and Sam was less than helpful when he tried to find out how she was doing. He doesn’t like Sam, he decided. What a grumpy man with a horrible temper. Shotaro shakes his head thinking about him, instead starting to daydream about Ava.

With his head in the clouds, he doesn’t hear the directors calling for him to come to the set. They were still filming the music video. Most of the group scenes were done now, but he still needs to do the scenes on his own. At least he isn’t alone on set, since Taeyong and Lucas stayed behind to keep him company.

While Lucas only worried that Shotaro might be self-conscious shooting solo, Taeyong also wanted to make sure that his newest member stays focused. He has nothing against any of them falling in love or having a crush, but he knows better than anyone what it’s like to debut under pressure. He would rather Shotaro doesn’t have to go through that too. So he had spent the better part of the day engaging him in behind-the-scene footage and asking him plenty of questions about the comeback and debuting, to keep his mind off of whatever happened the other night.

When he came back to the apartment, Shotaro didn’t look like he wanted to talk about it. Quite the contrary, he looked like he wanted to run back out there. Taeyong couldn’t let that happen. Besides, she’d already been taken to the hospital at that point.

“There’s nothing you can do right now. Come on.” Taeyong had said and pulled him over to the sofa, where the other two were already digging into the ramen they found in the cabinet. It was probably another trainee’s food, so they’ll need to replace it before they left.

So, he sat down and trusted Taeyong’s judgement. Just like today. He feels less alone now that Taeyong found out about his interest in Ava, despite not having any intention to act on those feelings. It’s just nice to have someone who helps you out, when you’re stressed and is on your side.

Shotaro lets the makeup artist touch up his makeup again, still ignoring the director’s calls, but Taeyong comes barging into his dressing room, vlogging camera in hand.

“Taro, why are you still in here?” Taeyong asks jokingly with a bright smile on his face for the camera. Shotaro snaps out of it and smiles right back.

“My nose needed more powder.” Shotaro responds cutely.

“Isn’t he cute?” Taeyong asks the camera. “Worried about his shiny nose, who’s gonna tell him he can’t hide his brightness since he is NCT’s sunshine?” The makeup artist snorts and quickly covers her mouth.

Shotaro blushes and rushes past Taeyong, almost running away from the watchful eye of their fans. He’s not even been introduced yet. He can’t ruin it for everyone with his facial expressions. He’ll stay focused and he’ll do his best.

So, he bans Ava from his mind. At least until he filmed his scenes. Lucas comes up behind him and claps a hand on his shoulder a little too strongly. Shotaro winces slightly, then rubs his shoulder with a chuckle.

“Oh sorry.” Lucas immediately apologizes, but the smile remains on his face. “You gonna be alright?”

Shotaro nods.

“Don’t worry too much, I’ll make sure you look great!” Lucas winks and taps him lightly on the shoulder this time, causing Shotaro to laugh and let out a sigh of relief.

Everyone is taking such great care of him, he feels undeserving. He hardly even has time to feel any self doubt, someone is always there to tell him he’s doing well and cheering him on. Even after training hard, he still sometimes feels like he shouldn’t be here, but the other members have almost fully kicked those thoughts out of his head. Now, he mostly just thinks about doing a good job to deserve staying rather than proving he deserves to be here.

Shotaro takes a deep breath and steps up onto the platform they built for the video. He bows to the director and some other staff members and apologizes for being late. Then, he gets to work with Lucas giving him two thumbs up from the back and Taeyong smiling proudly while still filming. As long as they are on his side, he’ll be invincible. As long as they are on his side, he can do this.

The clock hits midnight and Ava can’t bring herself to refresh the page. Instead she closes her laptop completely and places it beneath the counter. Out of sight, out of mind.

The exam results are released today at midnight; these will determine almost 50% of her final grade. If she failed them, her parents will definitely become suspicious. Of course, she could just check and kill the anxiety. But maybe not knowing is better, than the anxiety that could come should she have failed.

That seems logical. So she gets up from her spot and heads over to the microwave to distract her brain. Cleaning the microwave seems to do wonders when it comes to refocusing her mind.

With her head stuck in the appliance, she doesn’t notice the person standing outside under the streetlight on the other side of the road. If she’d just look up, she could prepare for the hell that is about to be raised on her as soon as her father gets back home and tells her mother what she has been up to. But she doesn’t and instead shakes her booty to some Shakira song on the radio.

Her father has been watching her for roughly fifteen minutes, debating whether to go in or not. A part of him is proud that she took the initiative and got herself a job, but the other part of him is angry she didn’t tell them. It’s a huge responsibility to take on a part-time job while studying. He knows it too well, having failed at balancing both himself. Of course that doesn’t mean she will struggle also, but he can’t risk her being overwhelmed at all. She should focus on studying, especially knowing what students go through these days.

He tightens his grip on the cooling bag Ava’s mother had him bring up with him, after finding out that she had bene sick. The university did call them to inform them of the missed attendance. Since her record is so squeaky clean, they got worried something had happened to her. It was unlike her to miss a day of classes, her mother agreed with the admin staff.

So, she quickly packed up some soup and some treats her daughter likes to cheer her up. Her father is holding another bag in his other hand, with a pharmacy logo on it. Inside is a range of different medicines, since she just told them it’s cold and she’s over it already so not to worry.

If she just looked up, she would see her father’s worried expression and his internal battle to confront her right now. Even if she just peaks out the window, she would recognize him right away. But her brain had shut off and she is only letting thoughts about how clean her microwave looks run through her mind.

After a couple of minutes, her father sighs and starts walking away. He takes his phone out of his pocket and dials his wife’s number.

Ava continues on her mission to clean the whole shop. She first takes apart the shelves one by one and wipes them all down to perfection. Everything seems so entertaining right now, compared to checking her grades. She doesn’t leave a corner undusted and makes sure to even catch the nasty corner behind the juices that she knows Sam doesn’t clean. When she takes away all the cartons she confirms what she already knew. A big stain is waiting for her to clean it up. He must’ve just stacked new products in front of it, thinking no one would ever know.

Around 2:30AM a customer comes in, but Ava is wiping the bottom shelf with her back to the door. The music plays so loudly, that she doesn’t even hear the door open and close again. She is alerted to a customer’s presence, when someone taps her shoulder two times. She immediately jumps and falls over in her crouched position.

“AH!” She shrieks and starts cowering away from the intruder. Her brain instantly going back to the incident the other night. She brings her arms up to shield her head out of fear.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Shotaro’s sweet voice sounds through the space as he leans down next to her, a worried expression on his face. He looks exhausted, is the first thing she thinks when she looks at him.

He should be in bed and not here with her right now. Of course she is happy to see him, but he works from the morning until, well, the next morning. He really needs to rest every chance he gets. She reaches out her hands and puts them on his cheeks, smoothing out wrinkles that formed around his eyes.

Shotaro freezes, but he doesn’t pull away. Her hands are warm and the small circles she draws near his temples have a calming effect. He looks straight in her eyes but her gaze is on her own hands until she finally looks up.

Ava drops her hands. “Sorry.” She mumbles, a blush rushing to her face.

She stands up and wipes her hands off her vest, before holding out a hand to him to get up. He takes it and smiles to himself. That was nice.

“Did you pass?” Shotaro asks following her to the register. She sits down behind it her eyes wide.

“How…?” She asks.

“You mentioned that the results would be out tonight.”

“How do you even remember that?” Ava reaches for her laptop and drops it on the counter. “I’ve not checked yet.” She sighs.

“What? It’s almost 3AM. How did you hold out for 3 hours?” Shotaro urges her to open the laptop and check by pushing it closer to her. “Do it now.”

“What if I failed?”

“Then I’ll buy you ice cream.” He counters. Ava smiles shyly.

“What if I pass?” She meets his gaze expectantly, unsure what she wants to hear him say. Shotaro pretends to think about it for a while. He even brings his hand to his head and taps a couple of times.

“Then I’ll buy you ice cream.”

“So Ice cream is a certainty in my future. Nice.” Ava chuckles along with him before opening the laptop. Suddenly overtaken by her anxiety again, she turns the laptop around. “You check.”

“Me?”

“No, the ghost behind you.” Shotaro actually checks behind him, causing Ava to laugh at him. “Yes, you.”

Shotaro refreshes the page on the screen and waits for the little wheel to stop turning. Once the page loads, he scrolls down looking for her name in the list. Surely enough, he finds her quickly and closes the laptop abruptly.

Ava peeks out from underneath her hands, but Shotaro isn’t there. She drops her hands and stretches her head up to look for him, only to see him by the freezer. He reaches in and takes out two, before holding them up for her to see.

“Which one?” He asks keeping his tone cool, not giving anything away.

“Chocolate.” She responds without hesitation.

He comes back to the register and drops the two items in front of her.

“So, are these celebratory or consoling?” She bites her lip and closes her eyes, waiting for him to reply. She must’ve failed. If she had passed, he wouldn’t have taken so long to tell her. He’d have made confetti appear out of his sleeves or given her that eye smile he is showing her right now- “I passed?” She asks in astonishment.

He nods and his smile grows brighter, if that’s even possible. Ava lets out a celebratory scream and jumps up and down excitedly. She comes around the counter and pulls Shotaro in for a hug, before she can think about it. He wraps his arms around her without hesitation. Whatever bit of willpower he had left, not to act on his feelings, slowly evaporates into thin air, while he holds her close.

Chapter Text

Some part of her would prefer the creepy customer back over the two people standing in the store right now. She doesn’t know how long she was expecting this all to go well, but she had hoped she could do it for at least half a year. But no, after two months it seems her luck has run out.

Ava’s parents were sitting in their car for a whole, before the store was finally empty and they decided to come in. At 11PM, they step in the door and watch how their daughter’s eyes widened and her brain struggles to find an excuse.

“I-“ Ava starts but bites her lips. “Hi. What are you guys doing here?”

Ava’s hands start trembling and her heart almost beats out of her chest. Her father’s expression is unreadable, but her mother isn’t even trying to hide her anger as she looks around the shop like it is a pigsty.

“What are you doing here Ava?” She asks with frustration in her voice.

“Working, mom.” Ava responds stating the obvious.

“We talked about this.” Ava’s mom walks up to the register and peaks behind it, to see the stack of cleaning supplies. “How long have you worked here for?”

“Maybe two months?” Ava reveals and tries to hide the mess of things under the counter, but that was the wrong thing to do.

Her mother grabs her arm and pulls her forward to get a better look of the back of her head, where her hair looks strange. She brushes the hair aside to reveal a glued wound. She gasps and Ava winces, not at any pain, but at her own idiocy.

“What happened?” Ava’s mother’s face is taken over with worry as she waves her husband over. “Look at this.”

Her father takes a hold of her head and twists it to get a better light, almost unable to really focus on the wound without his reading glasses.

“Ava, where did you get hurt like this?” He asks her once he realises.

Her mind is racing trying to come up with a plausible excuse, but nothing comes to her fast enough. The truth it is then… Ava curses herself.

“The other day… someone robbed us.” Ava explains, squeezing her eyes shut, ready to be shouted at for getting a job and then being put in this situation.

But it doesn’t come. Instead her father hugs her from behind and her mother joins from the side. They stand there for a little and Ava’s confusion turns to sadness in light of their comfort. She hasn’t really been able to process what happened, being too busy keeping this secret for them and pushing on with her studies. So, out of the blue, the water gates open and she bursts into tears. Instead of scolding her, they rub her arms and hold her until she is done. Thankfully, no customers are craving any snacks right now or they just don’t to awkwardly interrupt their moment.

At least that’s why Shotaro is considering going up to their apartment straight away. Taeyong is walking him home from his last day at the shoot after treating him to some pizza. He’s joking around how everyone will fall for Taro’s cuteness the second he is announced, especially with his tiktok account. Taeyong has no doubt that he will have an instant following. This warms his heart, he hopes only for the best for his two new members and he will do his best to help them be received well.

The second Shotaro spots the convenience store, Taeyong might as well be talking to a wall. He grows distant, like he is pulled into another world than the one he is in and he can’t focus on anything else but the girl who is crying in what must be her parents’ arms. He wonders what’s going on and if she’s okay. He knows how hard she had been hiding her job from them.

They wouldn’t ask her to quit now right? Especially after she still passed her exams with an A, right?

Shotaro isn’t sure if he is worried for her or worried that he’ll not get to see her anymore, should she leave. He doesn’t want to never see her again.

Taeyong sighs and jokingly pushes Shotaro out of the way of the lamppost he was about to walk into.

“Snap out of it.” Taeyong teases him and points to the store.

“Sorry.” Shotaro whispers rubbing his eyes.

“She’s really pretty.” Taeyong admits with a sad smile.

“Yeah…” Shotaro agrees, his lips curling up slightly. He looks down to hide his blush and puts his hands in his pockets.

“There’s really nothing wrong with a crush.” Taeyong starts more seriously. They stop in front of the apartment entrance.

“Taeyong, don’t worry. I’m completely committed.” Shotaro tries to sound reassuring, but the tone of his voice only translates his anxiety to disappoint.

“I know. That’s why I’m saying this.” Taeyong puts a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “When we debuted, there was no group before. It was from scratch. I’m not saying we had it harder, but it was different. There was not even time to think about dating.”

“Tae-“ Taeyong holds up his hand to stop him and Shotaro shuts up.

“You are debuting in an established group. You will face different challenges which I know you already worry about.” Taeyong squeezes Shotaro’s shoulder before dropping his hand. “Dating will just add more things that will weight down on your mind…”

“I really have no intention of acting on it.” Shotaro reveals with a sad expression, his heart breaking a little. “We are just friends and nothing will happen.”

“I believe you, but there will be many people who won’t see it that way.” Taeyong sighs. “Try not to fall in love too deeply. Broken hearts suck.”

Taeyong chuckles, that last part coming from his own heart rather than his experience as a leader. In the past couple of months, Sungchan and Shotaro really grew on him and he would hate to see them get hurt. While there is a level of pain and scrutiny he has no power over, he wants to at least be able to guide them through a smooth debut and protect them from unnecessary hate.

“I’ll go first.” Taeyong announces a bit more cheerfully. “You should go get some rest.”

Shotaro smiles to himself and glances over to the convenience store door, that still hasn’t moved. Taeyong follows his gaze and shakes his head.

“You’re not gonna sleep, are you?”

“No.” Shotaro chuckles guiltily.

“I’ll wait with you then.”

Shotaro doesn’t object and watches Taeyong sit down on the curb. He joins him and so the wait begins. Her parents have to leave at some point before the night ends.

Ava holds the small coffee cups and puts them down in front of her parents. They are gathered around the little table, their eyes finally dry. Ava’s mother started crying along with her at some point at the thought of her child in pain, too afraid to tell her about it.

“How did you know I worked here?” Ava finally asks unable to connect the dots in her head.

“The university called us about your absence.” Her mother reveals and takes a sip of her coffee. “So, I sent your father with your favourite soup and painkillers yesterday.”

“But when I got to your apartment, your roommates said you weren’t there.” Her father continues. “They gave me this address and I stood outside for a bit.”

“Why didn’t you come in then?” Ava is trying to remember if she saw her dad during her shift last night.

“You were busy.” He responds, but Ava notices the avoidance in his tone.

“I can’t believe you got hurt and didn’t call us. That will have some serious consequences, young lady.” Her mother says sternly.

Ava finds herself snorting, causing both her parents to frown. Ava’s eyes widen in shock at her own reaction and she brings her hands to her mouth. She bites her lips and tries to smile it off.

“I’m 19, mom.” She jokes. “You can’t ground me.”

“You’re right I can’t, but I can make you quit this job.” She fires back, while her husband stays quiet while sipping his coffee uncomfortably.

“Mom!”

“We talked about this before. You need to focus on studying, you know your dad-“ Her mother starts as if she were stating facts.

“I’m not dad.” Ava huffs in frustration. “I passed my exams with an A, despite having this job.”

“What about the next exams? Can you guarantee you’ll pass those?”

Ava rolls her eyes. “I wouldn’t even be able to guarantee that if I didn’t have a job.”

“Are you talking back at me?” Her mother gasps.

“You asked me a question and I answered it!” Ava leans forward and so does her mother until they are both almost at each other’s throats. Her father steps in and separates the two.

“Woah, calm down. You’re acting like bulls in an arena.” He tries to lighten the mood, but both women just snap at him. He holds up his hands. “Just trying to stop a murder.”

Ava rubs her neck and moves her hair behind her ear. Her mind is racing to find arguments in her favour, she really likes this job. The hours are perfect for her and she can even study on the job. Study on the job… That’s it.

“Mom, follow me.” Ava demands and gets up out of her chair before her mother can respond.

She will show them that there is nothing to worry about. The job isn’t a distraction from her studies, it’s an asset.

“No, stop right there.” Ava stops them from following her around the counter and makes sure they are standing right in front of her. “Dad what time is it?”

Her father checks his watch. “It’s 11:45.”

“And when did you come in?”
“11 sharp.” He frowns but responds.

“What’s your point, Ava?” Her mother asks impatiently.

“In the past 45 minutes, not a soul has come in.” They both have no clue where she is going with this and her mother’s patience is growing thin. “I have exactly 2 duties on the nightshift: cleaning those appliances there-“ she points over to the microwave and the coffee machine. “- and making sure the shelves are stocked before I leave.”

“Ava, we don’t have time to play around.”

“I’m not playing around, Mom.” Ava responds confidently. “I just got a job. I can study when there’s no one here, which is most of the night. That’s how I passed my exam.” She knocks on the counter. “I studied right here.”

Her father tries to hide an amused smile at his daughter’s conversational skills, but his wife shoots daggers at him with a single glare and the smile is wiped off his face. He clears his throat, but once her eyes are turned back to Ava, he gives her a quick thumbs up and wink.

“This isn’t stopping me from studying.”

“What about rest? You’re still a teenager, you need to get enough sleep.” She counters.

“I get enough.” Ava stubbornly argues. “Just think about it. I have a reading week anyway, so I don’t have any classes. Just give it a thought for a week, then whatever you decided I will respect.”

When her parents finally leave after agreeing to consider it, Shotaro and Taeyong try to hide in the apartment doorway. As soon as they are out of sight, Taeyong says his goodbyes and heads off home, but Shotaro rushes over to talk to Ava right away.

Chapter Text

Shotaro tosses and turns in his bed unable to fall asleep. The words Taeyong said to him still echoing in his head, underlining the doubts he already had. He knows that he is a skilled dancer and deserves his spot, but he fears that maybe others don’t see it that way and will try to ruin it for him if he slips up the slightest bit.

He doesn’t feel like he’s unfocused. He always gives 110% and more when he can. This is his dream and he will do anything in his power to achieve it. If that means distancing himself from Ava, then he will have to do that. It’s not like they are more than friends. He’ll just have to explain it to her well and hope she understands.

He lies awake staring at the ceiling, already unhappy with his decision. Why can’t he just stay friends with her? It’s so unfair. It’s not like he made a move or she made a move. No moves were made.

Taeyong and the other members keep telling him what a great job he is doing, so he clearly doesn’t have an issue delivering. He rubs a hand down his face and sits up. The room is quiet and only the occasional tiny snore fills the air.

Shotaro comes up with an idea. There really only is a problem once he is announced as a new member. Up until then, no one has any interest in him whatsoever. So what if he just keeps his friendship alive until that announcement is made? That way he can continue feeling the support of the girl he has a crush on, up until he succeeds. After that, it wouldn’t fair to her either, should they ever become the town’s newest gossip.

Shotaro throws off his duvet.

“What if I do badly and they change their minds?” Shotaro asks while nervously picking at his fingers.

He came down to buy some snacks to stress eat before the big music video reveal tomorrow. Or at least that’s what he told her. In reality, he just wanted to spend as much time with her as possible before he has to leave her behind. So instead of bringing that up, he uses the other thing he is worried about as an excuse to be here.

“You filmed so much promotional content and the music video. Don’t worry so much.” Ava tries to reassure him while stocking up the fridges. “Besides, what can you do about it right now?”

The companies can be so unpredictable and even Shotaro is aware of that. They’ve dropped many talented and popular trainees close to their debuts or removed members from groups and then cut them out of the music video. What is to say that they won’t do that to him.

So until everything is released he won’t let himself believe it’s really happening. The pain would be too great, if it got taken away.

“Nothing.” He responds, but shakes his head. “But still.”

“You can’t do anything about it now, so stop moping.” Ava jokes and points at the mop. “And start mopping. You might as well help me out.”

At first he hesitates, unsure if she’s serious or not, but her expectant look throws him off and he goes to pick up the mop. With a satisfied grin on her face, Ava turns away. Cleaning always helps her take her mind off of things, which is why she is restocking the fridges right now and why she has been deep cleaning the entire shop and staff room for the last couple of days.

Whenever she mentions the subject of her job to her parents, they find something else to talk about. Her week is almost up and her fingernails are basically none existent. In order to try and avoid biting them more, she spent the better part of her shift reorganising the cigarette stand behind the register. Maybe she should take up smoking. She slaps her herself lightly. What the hell is she even thinking?

Just like she promised, she will accept whatever her parents decide. They were willing to hear her out and now it’s out of her hands. Maybe she should just take her own advice and stop worrying so much when it is out of her hands.

Ava puts down the soda bottles she was arranging and heads over to the speaker. She turns the volume up, causing Shotaro to glance her way curiously.

Ava smirks and starts dancing along to the music. Shotaro looks around, checking that there are no customers seeing her dance like that. He starts laughing, but not at her. Her smile and happiness radiating off of her is making him want to enjoy himself just as much as she is.

So for a second he lets go of all his worries and joins her dancing as if no one is watching. Hopefully, it’ll stay that way also, because he really wouldn’t want anyone to see him like this.

She takes his hands and they start spinning around for a bit, until the song comes to an end and a slow one plays next. Ava smiles shyly but steps away, her hands slowly slipping out of his, but in a split of the moment decision, he takes a step forward and pulls her close.

Surprised, Ava doesn’t resist and instead looks up at him from her position flat against his chest. Shotaro stares back into her eyes, his hands tightly holding hers. He lets his gaze wander a little lower, just for a split second, but long enough to make him want to lean down and make his feelings clear.

But before he can do something he’ll likely regret, Ava smiles and pulls away from him.

“Should we change the song?” She asks wiggling out of his grip and moving over to the speaker system. “What should we listen to?”

Just as Ava asks, all the lights in the store turn off and music is cut off. Ava looks around slightly panicked, unsure what to do, when Shotaro takes out his phone to use the flashlight.

“The power must’ve cut out.” Ava states the obvious. “Wait here. There’s instructions on what to do in this situation in the staff room. I’ll be right back.”

Ava disappears into the back and doesn’t come back for a while. Shotaro makes his way over to the door to try the light switches. Maybe a simple on and off on them would fix the light. Spoiler: it doesn’t. Feeling a little stuffy now, he goes to open the door, only for the handle to be stuck.

“What the hell?” He mumbles to himself and tries to pull on it harder, but it doesn’t budge.

“Don’t waste your breath. The door is automatic and locks when the power cuts.” Ava comes back and explains. “I called the security company, someone will come by and the owner is heading over to fix the electricity.”

Shotaro is starting to regret coming here. He should be in bed sleeping, not stuck in the convenience store with Ava, the one person he can’t control himself around. Taeyong was right, he will lose focus if he keeps this up.

After admitting defeat on the door, the two of them sit down against the crisp shelf facing the pavement. If anyone were walking by, they could people watch, but it’s still too early.

“You still don’t wanna talk about what happened with your parents?” Shotaro asks after twenty minutes of comfortable silence.

“There’s not much to talk about…” Ava shrugs. “Whatever happens, I won’t be able to change it.”

“You could try talking to them again.” He suggests. “Maybe if you show them that you really like it here, they’ll definitely let you stay.” Shotaro has an ulterior motive of course, but he doesn’t say that. If he can’t be with her, then he at least wants her to stay around as long as possible.

“I already told them everything they need to know.” She smiles sadly. “It’s up to them now.”

“You’re a good daughter.” Shotaro tries to hide his own sadness. He really doesn’t know if he can go long without talking to her, let alone without seeing her at all. Even if he only gets to steal glances whenever he comes back from the training room late at night and he has to stand across the road looking through the window, he would much rather do that than to never see her again.

It might just be a crush or he might even like her now, he isn’t sure anymore, but for the last couple of months she has been a constant supporter and always managed to cheer him up. When he wanted to give in to the bad thoughts, she would pull him straight out of it and when he couldn’t sleep because he was struggling, she would sit with him and listen until he got tired enough to try again.

This relationship might be platonic, but Shotaro doesn’t want to lose a valuable friend. Knowing that it will likely come to be breaks his heart.

“Aw, thanks.” She puts her head in her hands and smiles brightly at him, giving him her cutest look. “Am I a cute daughter too?” She teases him, causing him to laugh.

He taps her nose with his index finger and ruffles her hair slightly in an affectionate way.

“You know…” She starts dropping her hands. “I had some hard times here, but I always knew that at some point during the night you and your friends would come by. It definitely made the nightshift more bearable.”

He grins widely and bites his lip at the compliment, folding his hands in his lap.

“Oh right, I meant to ask you.” She suddenly adds remembering the day she saw him with Taeyong. “You know your short friend with the grey hair?”

Shotaro frowns, but nods his head. “What about him?”

“The other day when my parents were here, I saw you guys outside. You looked a bit upset…” She tilts her head slightly trying her best to not seem nosy. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah everything’s fine!”

“If you wanna talk about it, you know my door is always open.” She chuckles when she realises. “Well, usually.”

Shotaro doesn’t laugh. His eyes are too busy trying to take in every single feature of her face so he won’t ever forget it. From the shade of her eyes to the pointiness of her chin, he wants to remember it all, so that during hard times, he’ll be able to think of her and feel like she is there with him. So that he can pretend for a bit that he didn’t have to abandon her.

Ava turns her head back to him, confused at his silence only to meet his intense gaze. His brown eyes burning holes into her head, but the laughter turns into a sweet and bright smile. It’s like time stops for a minute and they are the only people in the world. Nothing can bring them down and nothing can interrupt their time together.

So, Shotaro leans in very slowly, ready to risk it all for just a single kiss. He knows it’s wrong, but he can’t help himself. This is a mistake he is willing to make. Ava doesn’t move away and even turns her head slightly to angle herself better. Never breaking eye contact, Shotaro licks his lips as he closes the distance between them.

A sudden flash of light shines over them from the pavement, followed by a loud knock. They jump back at the same time and Shotaro hits his head off the shelf board and makes a couple of bags of crisps fall on him. He rubs his head in pain, but Ava is already at the door to meet the owner and the employee from the security company.

Chapter Text

Shotaro is sitting at the back, his members all waiting patiently until the executive producers come back. Unlike Shotaro, this isn’t their first time waiting for the final approval that the comeback will go ahead, so he doesn’t know how to act. Should he seem nonchalant, like whatever happens doesn’t actually matter? Should he let his emotions show and wear his heart on his sleeve?

He tries not to pick at his finger nails, since the stylists worked hard giving him a nice manicure, but the urge to scratch something is strong. The nervousness is slowly eating away at him and his leg starts to shake. Xiaojun says something making everyone laugh, but he doesn’t catch it. So he just laughs along anyway. If only he knew what to do, then he would maybe feel less nervous.

The clock on the wall seems to be ticking awfully slow and he really just wants to get back to practicing the dances, since he is still a little unsure about performing them live for millions of people soon.

Taeyong glances back at him and notices the repetitive tapping noise coming from his foot. He smiles.

“Don’t worry.” Taeyong says quietly, so no one else notices and puts his hand on Shotaro’s knee to stop it from shaking. “They’ve never changed their minds last minute.”

Shotaro smiles, grateful for the leader to have reassured him a little. Just then the door swings open and their managers come in, without the executives.

“We are good to go.” One of them says almost expressionless. Shotaro frowns. It looks they weren’t even the slightest bit worried that something would go wrong. It’s almost he truly did worry on his own and for nothing.

A cheer makes the rounds through and they all high five each other around him. Shotaro sighs, unaware that he had been holding his breath since they stepped in.

Something in his mind is blocking the immediate thought of debuting to really manifest. Maybe it’s because he is around so many people, that he doesn’t want to show his true excitement just in case it might still get snatched away. He can get idiotically excited later when no one is watching, but for now a smile will suffice.

“Okay, let’s run it from the top.” Taeyong gets up from his spot as the managers leave the room, so they can practice in peace. He comes over to Shotaro again, after getting the stereo remote and leans in to whisper in his ear. “Told you so.”

Shotaro returns the grin Taeyong gives him before turning away. He is truly going to debut. After all this time, working hard on his dancing and always trying more than his best, it’s finally his turn. To make sure that he doesn’t give anyone a reason to change their minds, Shotaro hits every move on the beat. Not a single mistake. If he works harder, then there is no stopping him now.

Ava is chewing gum lazily with her feet propped up on the counter. Tonight, there has been a total of five customers between the hours of 10PM and 12AM. It’s Saturday night, so this is very peculiar. Maybe everyone heard about the robbery and then the power outage and now they aren’t sure if the store is actually open. But Ava would give anything for a distraction.

She has already cleaned the appliances and mopped the floors. She even tidied up the space under the register, which looks like it has never been cleaned since the shop opened in 19-god knows when. Not even the anxiety about her parents’ decision is occupying her mind enough to keep her from being bored right now.

Surely they can’t possibly take this long to decide if they should let their adult daughter keep a job? So Ava starts listing the pros and cons in her head. Yes, the pro is that she can study all night and still passed her exams, but the con to that is a lack of sleep which could affect her general health. Yes, earning some money to support herself without having to ask her parents for more allowance is also a pro, but not at the cost of her being the victim of a robbery where she sustains a head injury.

Then there is the pro of seeing Shotaro every night, but her parents don’t even know about that. Maybe they’d agree to her staying here if they knew she had a friend who checks in on her every shift? Probably not. Stop being silly Ava, she thinks to herself and blows a chewing gum bubble.

Finally, a customer opens the door, but before they can truly step in someone calls for them and they close it again. Ava sighs, unsure how much more boredom she can take before she falls asleep.

But at that thought the scary voice of an angry store owner fills her head.

“If you fall asleep again, you are fired.” He had said sternly to her in the hospital. At first she thought he was angry that she wasn’t paying attention, so his store got robbed and she immediately started crying. But he quickly clarified that she might get hurt again if she falls asleep on the job. The nightshift isn’t an easy one and she got lucky the thief didn’t actually try and hurt her.

He’s right, she doesn’t want to go through that again. Having to call the police, giving police reports, going to the hospital, hiding it from her parents, worrying Shotaro… all those were things she didn’t enjoy and were really just a pain in her ass. Of course, suffering trauma to the head wasn’t great either.

So she heads down to the coffee machine and makes herself a nice and warm milk coffee. That’ll keep her up.

Her phone rings.

“Hello?” She answers cheerfully. It’s 12:30AM so she doesn’t expect anyone to call her and fully expects it to be a spam call. So she put on her best customer service voice, ready to mess with them a little bit. But the person who responds isn’t a sales person, but her dad and he sounds way too serious for her to stay cheerful.

“Hi honey.” He responds. “Do you have time tomorrow?”

Taeyong wanted to take Shotaro home after they all had dinner together, but he insisted on going alone. Of course Taeyong knew what he meant when he said he has plans tonight, but he didn’t object and just let him go. Hopefully, this will go well. Soon things will get a bit more complicated for him and Taeyong will just have to wait until he is reaching out to him for help instead of forcing his own advice on the boy.

Shotaro was going to take a cab, but then he couldn’t even sit still at the restaurant so he decides to walk home. It’s not that long a walk anyway and the September night is pretty warm. He passes couples holding hands, some kissing sitting on the bench and one even arguing in the park. But nothing can make the smile on his face disappear. He could be looking at a crying baby and still grin brightly.

A slight wind is brushing through his hair and he holds his jacket shut a little. He can’t wait to tell Sungchan that their title track was approved. He can’t wait to call his mom and tell her to keep an eye out for the announcement. And he can’t wait to announce to Ava that he will really debut. Like for real. Like it’s actually happening. Shotaro is bursting with happiness and he just wants to share it with everything and everyone in the world. Right now he feels invincible.

Ava hangs up the phone, biting her lip. She’s meeting her parents tomorrow, 5PM at the café down the road from her apartment. This is it. An official countdown to whether or not she can stay here. Technically, she could just tell them to shut up and continue working here, but she respects them too much and they might be a bit more knowledgeable on this. Her parents aren’t unreasonable people, maybe they’ll come up with a nice compromise.

Shotaro throws the door open. His eyes shine brighter than a Christmas tree, causing her to laugh at him a little.

“You’ve just made my day 100 times better.” Ava admits watching him run up to the counter. The door isn’t even closed yet when he stops in front of her.

“It went so well!” Shotaro shares his news excitedly a tingly feeling in his toes making him want to jump up and down, but he restrains himself. He is so full of adrenaline and excitement; he doesn’t even know what to do to get it to out of his system.

Ava grins. “Really? That’s awesome!” She holds up her hand. “Hold on!”

Ava steps around the register and hurriedly walks over to the freezer. She grabs out his favourite ice cream and almost jogs back to the front where he is waiting. She takes money out of her uniform vest and rings herself up.

“My turn.” She says and shrieks excitedly. She unwraps the ice cream for him and hands it over to him with very dramatic gestures. “Congratulations on successfully reaching your goal.”

Shotaro laughs and takes the snack out of her hands. Ava leans forward and puts her head in her hands to admire him. Shotaro blushes and swallows the bit he had just bitten off.

“What?” He asks shyly a blush forming on his face.

“I’m just jealous.” Ava grins and bites her lips, leaning back again.

“Of me?”

“Yes. I wish I knew exactly what my dream is and could go after it like you.” Ava teases, putting the last piece of her midnight snack in her mouth and getting up to throw it in the bin. “I have no clue what I wanna do, but watching you reach your dreams makes me want to get one too.”

“Maybe you’ve just not found it yet?” He asks turning to follow her with his gaze. She wipes her hand as soon as she drops the wrappers in the bin and faces him again.

“Maybe.” Her grin grows bigger. “But I am so excited for you! I will be ready! I will pre-order and I will go online and anonymously leave great comments about you everywhere.”

Shotaro’s heart warms up instantly and his feet start moving on their own. He can’t stop them and he doesn’t really want to stop them either. Every step towards her, makes the adrenaline pump through his veins faster and it’s like if he doesn’t do this now he will never do it at all.

“Maybe I should also make sure I see the premiere live so I can-“ Ava rambles on but is cut off when Shotaro outs his hand on her cheek and leans in.

Her eyes widen but she doesn’t pull back and lets him put his lips on hers softly. At first, the kiss is more like a hesitant peck, like Shotaro is waiting for her to decide if she wants this to happen or not. Ava places her hand on top of his on her cheek and turns her head slightly so their noses aren’t crushed against each other. Of course she kisses him back, she’d be crazy not to.

Chapter Text

It isn’t until then and there that Ava realises she has feelings for this guy. Maybe it was because of the exam stress or her parents taking up most of her thoughts, that she didn’t even consider her heart flutters might be because of him and his beautiful smile. But right now, his lips moving in sync with hers, there is no doubt about it.

Ava never really had the time to date or fall in love. She always focused so much on her studying that love seemed more like a distraction than a positive addition to her life. So she never ventured out into the field and stayed in her comfort zone.

Perhaps this was just another one of the things she didn’t do, because her parents just wanted her to study. They might have never actually explicitly told her not to date, but they certainly didn’t encourage it either. Maybe Ava went a bit far in her thoughts there, but she can’t believe the rush that’s running through her veins right now from a simple kiss.

If a kiss is this exhilarating, then what would anything else be like? Ava blushes at the way her mind is working, but doesn’t pull away. She wants to enjoy this a little longer. Just as the thought of deepening the kiss crosses her mind, he pulls away slowly.

“Wow.” He whispers shyly and looks away. He rubs the back of his neck and turns back to her, to see her flushed face. “Sorry.”

Ava raises her eyebrows in surprise. She doesn’t know what she expected him to say, but it was certainly not that. “Sorry?” She asks. “Was it that bad?”

Shotaro’s eyes widen. That’s definitely not how he meant it, why would she think that? It was the best kiss he’s ever had. Be it because it was actually amazing or because of the anticipation of it all, but it’s definitely a top three kiss.

“No, not sorry. I meant…” He tries to form words to save himself but his shoulders drop. “I didn’t mean that.”

Ava chuckles at his cute defeated expression and moves around him awkwardly to get back behind her counter. She turns her head to the security camera that is still efficiently recording everything going on here. She’ll have to make sure that her boss doesn’t check it in the morning.

“Ah, I forgot about that. I hope you don’t get in trouble.” Shotaro worries cutely and Ava’s heart melts again.

“It would be worth getting in trouble for.” She responds with a smile, but looks away as soon as he meets her eyes. The two of them blush and clear their throats.

It becomes apparent that neither of them have been in this situation a lot in their lives. Or at least they aren’t used to it enough to not be a little awkward.

“Besides, it won’t matter if I’m in trouble once my parents make their decision.” Ava complains and spins on her stool.

“Have they?” Shotaro asks curiously and Ava remembers that she hasn’t told him about the ominous phone call yet.

She’d rather not ruin the moment, so she just smiles and shakes her head. He’ll find out soon enough and then maybe she’ll have to ruin both their days. Everything that happened so far, should be cherished as a happy memory and not ruined by the shadow of her leaving her job. Besides, it isn’t finalised yet, so there is no point to worry about it.

“So your dream. What should it be?” Shotaro leans forward on the counter, his eyes sparkling still from the thrill of their kiss.

Shotaro didn’t plan to kiss her tonight. In fact, he had planned to quietly follow Taeyong’s advice and just stay friends. But sometimes the unexpected things are much more exciting and tonight at least, he has no regrets. He can go to sleep a happy man. Seeing her blush and feelings her heart race was such an exciting experience and he would love to do it all again, but they really shouldn’t. But he wants to. He is fighting the urge to just blatantly stare at her lips as she talks.

“I don’t know. I guess I am studying for the sake of getting a degree not a job…” Ava admits sadly. She had never thought about that too much. What does she want to do? “Travel.” She reveals deep in thought. “I wanna travel.”

“That’s a good dream.” He responds with a bright smile. Absolutely nothing can ruin his mood tonight. He’s debuting and he kissed the girl he likes, there’s literally nothing that can possibly happen to make his smile turn upside down into a frown.

Outside, on the sidewalk, Taeyong and Jaehyun are rushing away before either of the two inside can see them. They didn’t mean to spy on him, but it just happened that way. They watched him go inside after walking a couple of meters behind him to make sure he gets home safely. Jaehyun just sort of tagged along and then before he knew it, they were watching a soft porno.

Well not exactly that, but they were watching something they didn’t pay for and Taeyong cursed himself for letting Jaehyun come. It was already bad enough that Shotaro was caught by him, but by another member also? They’ll really have to keep this under wraps now.

Jaehyun didn’t say anything though and the two of them left to head home themselves. Taeyong didn’t mention it again either, but he sighed a couple of times. The worry about their newest member really getting to him slowly.

“Maybe I should start a travel blog?” Ava’s excitement takes over and she starts dreaming up all these things she could do once she can travel freely. “As soon as I graduate I can go travel the world and have some fun!”

“Why can’t you have fun now?”

Shotaro is right, why can’t she have fun now? Ava still thinks about this long after he’s left to go to sleep. He wasn’t sure if he should lean in to give her a kiss or just leave, so he awkwardly shuffled around until he eventually just waves at her from the door. They both laugh about it though and Ava can’t stop thinking about his smile.

Now that she is alone again, Ava has time to be all up in her head. Occasionally, the stressful fog in her mind would be lifted by the memory of his lips on hers and the smell of his nice cologne and the way his hand felt on her cheek. Then she has to compose herself, because she is at work after all. But she really wishes he hadn’t gone to sleep or she didn’t have to work still and could’ve joined him.

“Oh wow.” Ava whispers to herself, surprised at how quickly her thoughts escalated. It looks like the gates to hell have been opened and now she really just wants to try everything.

She really likes Shotaro. Her heart skips a beat just thinking about him and she hopes that whatever happens to her position here, she’ll still get to see him. Deep down she knows that’s going to be impossible, once he debuts and she can’t hold him back, but she’s still allowed to foolishly hope for a happy ending for the two of them. Even if the odds aren’t in their favour.

Once her boss comes in the door, Ava is so deep in her daydream, her lips are pursed slightly. It isn’t until he knocks on the counter that she snaps out of it and blushes in embarrassment. She definitely wasn’t thinking about the kiss for the hundredth time tonight. Luckily, the old man doesn’t feel the need to watch the security footage today and takes her word for it, when she says nothing happened.

Little does she know that he noticed the blush on her face and the urgency in her tone and understood fully well, that there is something on that tape she doesn’t want him to see. Since he trusts her not to steal from him, he doesn’t mind anyway.

She manages to turn her brain off for five minutes, which is enough for her body to fall into a much needed deep sleep. Much has happened during her potential last nightshift and she really needs the beauty sleep now before facing her parents. She tries to stay calm, since there is no point sweating about something she can’t change, but it’s hard to not worry when she just really wants to stay.

Her parents take a while to get the conversation going, avoiding the subject for a while like the plague. They order a chocolate cake, which they know if her favourite. Ava knows what that means and she isn’t happy.

“Bad news huh?” She says taking a piece for herself and licking her fingers. Her dad raises his eyebrows curiously. “Chocolate cake. You always feed me chocolate cake when you have bad news.” Ava elaborates causing her dad to chuckle. She does know them very well.

“Honey, please don’t see us as the bad guys.” Her mother pleads and reaches to hold her hand. Ava lets her and even squeezes it back.

“I don’t.” Ava tries to stay optimistic, but the chocolate cake really ruined the mood. If she isn’t careful, then maybe chocolate cake will forever be attributed with something bad. She can’t let that happen, so she won’t be sad about whatever they will say. Seems like a fool proof plan.

“Good, because we have come up with a compromise.” Her father continues with a smile. Ava frowns.

“What compromise?” Ava asks in confusion. Her parents look at each other and her mother nods at him to keep going.

“We checked all your grades and you didn’t slip at all, so we trust that you are able to work at the same time.”

Ava almost chokes on her piece of cake. This wasn’t what she was expecting at all, where is this going? Her mother stands up and comes over to hit her on the back and get her to stop coughing. Her father hands her a glass of water and she quickly manages to free up her airways again and breathe normally.

“I can keep working?”

“Yes.” Her mother responds. “But…”

“Ah, a but.” Ava sighs. She had already gotten her hopes up, but they just came crashing back down like a piano in an old movie.

“Hey, don’t call your mother that.” Her dad jokes, earning himself barely a smile. There is no time for dad jokes when Ava could potentially keep her job. “Tough crowd.”

“Honey, we just don’t want you working the nightshift anymore.” Her mother gives her a genuine concerned look and Ava can’t get mad at that.

Thinking about it logically her mother has a point. While the job didn’t affect her grades, there are dangers that come with it and she did get injured because of a thief once. It is the logical request to make, but she loves her job at the convenience store and she can’t imagine working anywhere else.

“My friend’s daughter owns a coffee shop only two streets away from your apartment.” Her father pulls out his phone and hands it to her on the contacts page. “That’s her number, she said to give her a call and the job is yours if you want it.”

“The hours are great. She says it’s flexible since most of her staff are students.” Her mother explains further. “You guys can just work out a rota that doesn’t clash with your classes and you’ll still have plenty of time to study.”

“And sleep.” Her father nods and smiles too.

Ava stares at the phone. She has to admit this is a better deal than what she had imagined. She thought they would just shut her down and tell her to stop working altogether. This is definitely much, much better. Then why is she hesitating?

Chapter Text

Ava is finishing her last shift at the convenience store and is standing by the window hoping he’ll come home. The last couple of days he hasn’t come by once and she is getting worried something happened to him, but surely someone would’ve told her then. Right?

Ava nervously taps her foot on the ground. In twenty minutes her parents are coming to get her and taking her for breakfast. They have something to give her boss, so they want to personally pick her up from her last shift. But Ava doesn’t even spare a thought for them right now, she just wants to tell Shotaro that she’s leaving. She can’t just disappear on him like that.

A group of guys come out onto the pavement from the apartment complex. Ava stands up straighter and cranes her neck to see better but she doesn’t spot him. She sighs in disappointment when they all pass her window and she still doesn’t see him among them. She could just come back every now and then after she quits, but he never comes home at the same time. So it would just be futile anyway.

Ava bites the one nail she has given herself free rein of when she’s nervous until it almost starts bleeding. She’s really worried now as the time keeps ticking down way too quickly. The nightshift didn’t usually go by this quickly and she is trying her best to make it feel slower. If she could slow down time for real, then maybe she could see him again. Is he not coming home today? Has he already come home and she doesn’t even know it?

Shotaro is sleeping safe and sound in his new apartment. His new room is just for two people and Sungchan’s snores aren’t loud enough to wake him up tonight. He moved two days ago and he was most excited about having a smaller crowd in his room. All that extra space for them to practice dancing after hours made him very excited like a little boy given candy. It’s not like he can’t go to the company any time and use one of their rooms, now that he is debuting with NCT.

Ava doesn’t know that yet though, since Shotaro had promo-shoots every day this week. He spends much time of his day thinking about her though and wanting to go over there just to kiss her behind the shelves again. No one has to know anything. Taeyong and Jaehyung haven’t let on yet, that they know. But they are definitely keeping an eye on him now that he has officially been announced. If need be, then an intervention might have to happen.

Love is complicated enough already without adding being an Idol to the equation.

Ava picks up her bag from the table in the staff room and sighs looking around once last time. She smiles, but deep down she wants to cry. This was her first job and she will definitely miss the quietness and the occasional excitement of the nightshift. There are many people she would’ve never met if she didn’t start here, including someone who makes her heart skip a beat every other hour.

She turns the light off on her way out and comes back to the shop to find her parents handing the owner a fruit basket with an envelop inside. She stops in her tracks, unsure if they noticed her come in or not. She doesn’t want to ruin anything and this definitely looks like something they don’t want her to know about.

“I appreciate what you did for Ava.” Her mother says in a hushed voice, confirming with Ava that she shouldn’t be witnessing this. She takes a step back and tries to hide behind the open door, so she can still eavesdrop.

“This is a nice gesture, but I can’t accept this.” He refuses politely and chuckles. “Ava is a good kid. I just did what any decent person would do.”

“When she was too scared to reach out to us, you helped her out.” Her father’s voice chimes in with a sad tone. “I’d like to think I would do that for someone else’s child too, so please take this. It’s not much, but it’s a token of our gratitude.”

Ava waits for the old man to decline again but instead she hears him sigh. She peaks through the gap in the door and watches as he nods with a smile. He puts his hand on her mother’s on the basket handle, but doesn’t pull the basket over the counter. Instead he looks up at her parents with the warmest, kindest smile she had ever seen on him.

“You’re very welcome.” He squeezes her mother’s hand and the moment is so wholesome, Ava doesn’t ever want to interrupt it.

If only she wasn’t clumsy and didn’t have to take that extra step back and fall flat on her ass. Her dad comes rushing back at the sudden noise and laughs at her when he sees her position on the floor.

“Did you trip over your own feet?” He asks but still leans down to help her up. “You were meant to have that whole standing up on your own thing down by now.”

Despite the pain in her left butt cheek, Ava laughs at her dad’s joke and they join the other two out front. Her mother looks like she is trying to wipe away some tears and Ava awkwardly smiles at her, before heading over behind the counter holding her nicely folded uniform in her hands.

“Thanks for everything, boss.” She says and is suddenly overtaken by emotions she didn’t know she had. “I loved working here.” She holds out her hand to shake his, but he opens his arms wide for her and she doesn’t hesitate to give him a hug.

She might not have worked here for a very long time, but in the couple of months she spent behind that counter, she knew that he would always be there if she had a problem. This stranger took her under his wing so easily, Ava didn’t even notice how much she liked the warmth beneath it. She hears him chuckle lowly as he pats her back a couple of times affectionately.

“Take care.” He says as he slowly backs out of the hug after she loosens her grip. She nods and smiles sweetly.

“Take your vitamins every day.” Ava instructs mockingly serious.

“Aye, aye, captain.”

Ava steps out onto the pavement, checking left and right if by chance he appeared, but there is no one there. Her parents follow her out rather quickly and she can’t mask the fact she is checking everything corner of the road, as far as she can see, just in case. Her father taps her on the shoulder when calling her name didn’t get her attention.

“Honey, let’s go.” He says when she finally looks at him. She nods, but doesn’t follow them straight away. They are at least ten steps ahead, when she finally accepts the fact that he isn’t coming and she might never see him again.

If only she could’ve told him before she left. When he shows up the next night, he throws the door open expecting to see her sitting behind the counter or dancing while cleaning the microwave, but instead Sam is sitting there chewing gum with an open mouth and reading trashy magazines from the rack. Shotaro scratches his head in confusion, wondering why Ava isn’t here today.

When he asks Sam, the latter just shrugs and says she quit, but Shotaro knows she would’ve told him if that was the case. Outside, Taeyong and Jaehyun are waiting for him.

He had tried to sneak out of the dorm at 3AM, but the two of them were still discussing their comeback in the kitchen. Jaehyun teased him a bit and Taeyong tried his best not to sound condescending when he told him it’s a bad idea. After some back and forth, they agreed to let him go but under the condition that they can go with him to keep watch.

“Now that you are announced, people might recognize you.” Taeyong explains as he puts on his jacket. “It might be 3AM, but there’s always people watching our every step. It’ll look better if the three of us go out.”

Shotaro didn’t question that. If his leader says that, then there must be truth to it. He’s more experienced anyway and as long as he gets to go to Ava, Shotaro doesn’t care who is coming. They could invite Big-Foot for all he cared. But even Taeyong and Jaehyun could see that that wasn’t Ava. Jaehyun quickly runs up the steps and into the store to catch up with Shotaro.

“Let’s get something.” He whispers through his mask and nudges him to follow. Jaehyun pretends to look at the shelf selection when Shotaro steps up next to him. “What happened?” He asks quietly, checking that Sam was still not paying attention.

“She doesn’t work here anymore.” Shotaro responds in confusion and picks up a packet of crisps looking at it intently. If he reads the ingredients over and over again, maybe he can stop his heart from beating so quickly. Maybe he can avoid it breaking once he comes to terms with the fact she might be gone forever. “I don’t even know her number or where she lives…”

The tone in Shotaro’s voice shifts to panicky and Jaehyun takes the crisps out of his hands. He pulls him along the store with him all the way over to the fridges and picks up a six-pack of beer. They aren’t really supposed to drink this close to a comeback, but screw that. Jaehyun pays faster than Shotaro can think up more reasons why she didn’t tell him and they rush out of there.

“What happened?” Taeyong asks worriedly as they pass him.

“She quit.” Shotaro responds, his voice small and sad.

“Can’t you text her?” Taeyong follows up, but Shotaro just shakes his head and lets it hang low. “Oh…” He looks to Jaehyun who nods his head towards the beer in his arms.

“Let’s go home.”

That night Jaehyun showed Shotaro his secret dance moves that always make people laugh, but the latter barely manages a polite smile. His mind is too busy trying to figure out how he could possibly find her. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise and it’s the universe’s way of telling him that Taeyong was right: he should focus on debuting or he will just get hurt. Well now he’s hurt and doesn’t know what to do.

When Shotaro picks up his beer, he notices that it’s already empty. Again. Next to him on the couch, Taeyong is sleeping with his mouth open and snoring softly. Lying on his lap is Jaehyun’s head, he also is fast asleep. They tired themselves out trying to distract him and cheer him up, but nothing worked.

He puts down his empty can and carefully puts his hands under Jaehyun’s head, lifting it up ever so slightly to push a pillow beneath it. When he doesn’t wake up, Shotaro places his head down softly and picks up the blankets. He turns off the TV and lets the room fall into darkness, so they can sleep more comfortably.

He heads out again and just stares at the store from the other side of the street. Maybe if he asks the owner, he’ll be able to give him her phone number. The old man seemed to like him when they met that one night, or maybe that was just an assumption that his mind made in that moment to justify him asking for that kind of information. Why didn’t he ever ask for her number? Idiot.

The old man was no help though. He told him that she is now working to a place closer to her apartment, but he can’t give out his ex-employee’s information. Despite feeling pity towards him, the owner couldn’t break the law like that, but he did hint the café name in their conversation. It is really just up to Shotaro to figure it out.

But he doesn’t and whenever he comes by the store to check if she has come by to meet him, he would miss her by an hour or twenty minutes. Completely unaware that the seat he’s sitting at eating his ramen is also where she sat just a little while earlier waiting for him to show up also.

Ava even tries coming during the day or early in the morning, yet they never meet. After a week, Ava’s classes become more challenging and she spends her nights in the library. With the debut coming closer, Shotaro’s training runs deep into the night and he can’t keep his eyes open long enough to make it all the way to his old apartment complex.

And so slowly they continue on living their lives, wondering what could’ve been if they had just run into each other once; if they had just exchanged numbers like normal people; or, if they had simply let themselves fall a little sooner so they would’ve figured this out earlier.

Instead they are now stuck with the regrets that keep aching their hearts. Ava stops going to the convenience store and the memory of her job there starts to fade as time goes on. Sometimes, she thinks about him and makes plans to head down there but then stops herself. She can’t go there again and have her heart broken for the hundredth time when he doesn’t show up. She can’t resent him for not showing up, when that isn’t his fault.

So she lets herself forget a little to ease the pain.

Taeyong sees through Shotaro’s fake smiles, but doesn’t mention it. He spends a lot of their time together complimenting him on his skills instead, to take his mind off of things and also to boost his self-confidence again. Ever since Ava disappeared, he noticed his newest member hold his head a little lower and slump his shoulders a little more, when the cameras aren’t rolling.

Shotaro only has one regret. If only he hadn’t been too tired from the shoots to go tell her he moved.

Chapter Text

The summer breeze comes into the coffee shop as a new customer opens the door. The sun shines through the front windows and onto the pastel coloured walls, brightening up the place. The sounds of happy chattering, busy keyboard smashing and the coffee machine grinding thoroughly fill the space as Ava rushes to finish her essay before the deadline.

She has a total of twenty minutes left and just needs to fix the conclusion in time. She can do that. Then she’s on holiday, then she can rest and relax and let herself breathe again. Her colleague comes over to take away the empty glass and replace it with a freshly made smoothie for the fourth time in three hours, earning herself a very muttered and incomprehensible thanks from Ava. She chuckles and lets the student get back to her paper.

Ava doesn’t have time for spoken words until she finishes the written word assignment. She finally hits the last full stop and lets out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding. Before anything can go wrong, she saves the file and changes the heading from “the assignment from hell” to her name and student ID.

“Done?” She hears her colleague shout from the counter, after she noticed the change in stance, but Ava just waves a thumbs up in the air as her other hand keeps typing away on the submissions page.

The second she hits submit it’ll be over. No more studying, no more late-nights. Just graduation. If she passes, that is.

Ava uploads the file, but then takes her hands off the keyboard. She checks the time. Ten minutes left before the deadline. She holds her hands up as if she just got a manicure and doesn’t want to mess up her nails, before cracking her knuckles nervously. This is what she worked towards. All that time spent working and studying… It all just comes down to this one paper. 75% of her grade is in that single document.

“I’m doing it.” She encourages herself quietly and presses down before she can change her mind. It’s not like she wasn’t ever going to submit it, but she does have those extra ten minutes to really enjoy still being a student. When she lifts her finger off the mouse keypad, the door opens and the small bell chimes announcing a new customer. “Done!” She shouts and jumps up excitedly.

People turn to look at the noise and stare a little, but Ava couldn’t care less. When she turns to give her colleague two thumbs up and a wide grin, she isn’t met with the face she expected. In fact, it’s a face she hasn’t seen up close in a very long time.

But she would recognize those eyes among a million just from a single glance. The grin on her face slowly disappears, waiting to see if he remembers her at all. It’s not like two years is that long, she’ll be at least a little hurt if he doesn’t know her.

He lifts his hand up to give her a single wave. “Hi.” The corners of his mouth curl up slightly and that’s enough for her lips to form a grin again. Freedom doesn’t look so bad.