Chapter Text
Astrid tapped her foot as she patiently waited with Shamira for her husband and Shamira's longtime on-again-off-again boyfriend. She wondered if those two were ever going to get their act together. Probably after she and Steve are three kids in and all living on some farm in the middle of nowhere U.S.A. After the war was over of course. Would be kinda hard to move places while she was fighting the Axis in Italy and Austria. But once she got back… She had been pushing for them to move. It would be good for Steve's health at least but the man was born and bred New York. Stubborn as a mule. And she wouldn't have it any other way.
The two of them were standing at the entrance to the Stark Expo. In front of a statue. It would be the last time the four of them would see each other before the three of them would be sent off to war. Leaving Steve behind. It hurt Astrid deep to leave him. She thought she left all of that behind her when she came to the U.S in the first place. But it seemed like the past could not leave her alone. The government had all but drafted her. Basically, forcing her to sign up under the threat of hurting Steve. But knowing how much serving meant to Steve helped. Also, that tiny bit of her that regretted leaving. So, she went for it, on the condition that Shamira would come with her. Took some arguing but Shamira was never really going to say no. Despite how much she may have wanted to. Astrid still remembered the look on all their faces when she came home and told them. Shock, anger, sadness before finally succumbing to resignation. It broke Steve even further that he couldn't go but it made him all the more determined to try. That was where he probably spent today. At some recruitment office.
"Could you at least pretend to be happy?" Shamira asked nudging her. That broke her out of her thoughts. Not even the fireworks in front of them were able to do that. "At least until we have to leave. Then you can be dour."
"I still have a hard time believing that we are actually going back," Astrid replied.
"That's what you get for being you. Still, it will be over before you know it. We will abandon our post, walk into Berlin. Personally, kick Hitler's ass and be back for you even know it."
Astrid bit her lip. "I know. I just hope Steve will be okay."
"He'll be fine. You got half the city looking after him at this point Speaking of which…"
"Steve!" Astrid called out. She saw him with Bucky. Who was already dressed in uniform. Steve meanwhile looked a little frazzled. His tiny blonde figure next to Bucky who was several heads taller. Once they got close Astrid cupped Steve's face and gave him a long kiss. Normally she wasn't into public affection but she wasn't going to see him for a long time. Steve quickly reciprocated. Placing his hands on her back to pull her in closer. Bucky and Shamira snickering in the background.
"I think the two of you need to breathe at some point," Bucky joked.
"What can I say?" Steve responded after breaking the kiss. "Didn't expect the most amazing woman in the world to fall in love with me. Better take my chances now." He was breathing slightly hard and his face tinged red. He was still embarrassed even after all the time they had been married. A little over a year now.
Astrid gave Bucky the side-eye. "I'm not going to be seeing him for a while. I'm going to take what I can get now." Though she did have the faint taste of blood on her lips. Noticing faint bruising around Steve's mouth. "You got into another fight didn't you?"
Steve gave her a look. "He didn't give me much choice."
She rolled her eyes at him. "Just try not to get into any more fights while I'm gone." She fished a bottle out of her bag. Taking out two pills and handing them to Steve. "Here. This will clear up the bruising." Steve let out a sigh but did as she said. Letting the medicine dissolve on his tongue. Already she could see it working. Before turning her gaze over towards Bucky.
She looked over his uniform and clicked his tongue. "Should we be calling you Sergeant Barnes from now on?"
"Of the 107th."
Both the girls chuckled. "I guess God has a sense of humor," Shamira stated. "Astrid here is the doc of the 107th." That led to smiles being broken out by the rest. Not only would the three of them be together but they would be serving in the same unit Steve's father did.
They soon headed straight into the expo. Taking in all the various wonders. Though she and Steve were more looking at each other over anything. The noises, sights, colors, could not distract either of them. Splitting a bag of popcorn. The two of them enjoying the time they had. Trying to not think about what was coming next.
Eventually, they made their way over to the Modern Marvels Pavilion and the World of Tomorrow. Where Howard Stark was presenting his latest invention. Astrid always thought he came off rather smug. He had that vibe about him. But the man was apparently a genius. Nesting Steve into her the two of them watched the presentation. Making sure that he was in front. Stark did a routine with a bunch of showgirls in front of a car. Women were screaming for him in the crowd.
"Any interest?" Steve asked softly looking up at her.
She gave him a quick smile. "When I have you? No way."
"Ladies and gentlemen," Stark started "What if I told you that in just a few short years your automobile won't even have to touch the ground at all?" The showgirls removed the tires around the car. Stark moved out of the way to make room for them. "With Stark Gravitic Reversion Technology you'll be able to do just that." He turned a nob and a mechanical humming started up. Pushing a lever, the car started to float in midair.
"Holy cow," Bucky uttered before turning to Astrid. "You're not doing this are you?"
"No, it's definitely the car," Astrid responded. Suddenly sparks started to come out of the wheels and it crashed to the ground in a splash of sparks. The entire crowd gasped and took a step back. "See?"
"I did say a few years, didn't I?" Stark called out. The audience laughed, erupting in applause. Steve however seemed to have his mind on something else.
Continuing around the Expo it wasn't much longer until they ran into an army recruitment center. They were virtually everywhere. Steve unable to keep his eyes off of it. Astrid watched as he walked up. Standing where he could see himself as a soldier. Only he was too short to even see himself. Astrid and Shamira stood back as Bucky walked up to him. Though they were close enough that they could still hear the conversation.
Bucky lightly shoved him on the shoulder. "Come on. You're kinda missing the point of a double date."
"You go ahead. I'll catch up with you," Steve responded.
"You really going to do this again? To Astrid? Today of all days?"
"Well, it's a fair. I'm gonna try my luck."
"As who? Steve from Ohio? They'll catch you or worse they'll actually take you."
"Look, I know you don't think I can do this."
Bucky was getting slightly more aggravated with him. It was unfortunate that he was fighting with Steve. Who could compete in the most stubborn person games and probably win. "This isn't a back alley, Steve. It's war."
"I know it's a war. You don't have to tell me-"
"Why are you so keen to fight? There are so many important jobs."
"What do you want me to do? Collect scrap metal in my little red wagon?"
"Yes! Why not?"
"I'm not going to sit in a factory." He stared at Bucky defiantly. "Bucky. Come on. There are men laying down their lives. Astrid and Shamira both gave their all and now are heading back. After everything, they had been through. I got no right to do any less than them. That's what you don't understand." He slightly shook his head. "This isn't about me."
Bucky clearly did not believe him. "Right. Cause you got nothing to prove."
"You're right, he doesn't," Astrid stated stepping into the conversation. "That shouldn't be a reason why he joins." Steve turned to look at her. She could almost feel herself melt under his gaze.
"Again, I wouldn't wish what we are about to go into on our worst enemy," Shamira added in. "There is a reason why we left the fight." She glanced over at Astrid. Wondering if they were going to make it back this time.
Astrid looked back at Shamira. She knew that the only reason Shamira was going back was because of her. A fact Astrid was truly grateful for. Astrid turned back to look at Steve. "Regardless, nothing we say is going to change your mind." One look at Steve and she knew that was the truth. He was probably going to keep trying to be recruited long after she left.
Bucky shook his head and took a few steps back. "Don't do anything stupid until I get back."
"How can I?" Steve asked. "You're taking all the stupid with you."
Bucky shook his head again and approached Steve for a hug. "You're a punk."
"Jerk. Be careful."
After the quick embrace with Bucky, patting each other on the back, Shamira hugged him as well. "Be safe. Astrid would end the war before you got there if anything happened to you."
"Wouldn't want that," he chuckled. She and Bucky saluted him and left. Leaving Steve and Astrid alone. Giving them a chance to say goodbye.
"I suppose this it then," Astrid stated.
Steve frowned. "I thought you were shipping out in the morning?"
Astrid shook her head. "I wish there was a better way to tell you this. The others are… due to my situation I have other things that need to be taken care of." It was the unspoken fact about why she was really going over there. The truth that they all knew yet didn't bring up. If they never talked about it then it may not be true. Maybe she could just be an army doc sent over to save lives. Rather than what she really was.
This time it was Steve who pulled her in. Wrapping an arm around the back of her neck. Pressing his lips tightly against hers. It felt like a second and an eternity all in one moment. When Steve broke it off he was panting slightly and looked up at her. Bringing her forehead down so that they were touching. "Promise you'll come back to me."
"Nothing in this world or any other can stop me. Besides who knows when I'll see you next. Maybe I will see you over there." She looked deeply into his eyes. Connecting their minds and letting the feelings flow between them. "You are meant for more than this you know."
He gave her a smile. "Write to me as often as you can. Keep the others safe too."
"I will to both. It's at least part of my job. I hope." The two of them continued to linger. Not wanting to part but unable to stay. Eventually, Astrid gave him one last kiss on the cheek. However, when she pulled up she thought she saw a familiar figure in the recruitment center. But before she could blink, he was gone.
"Astrid?" Steve asked her. "You okay?"
She huffed and looked down on him. "It's nothing. I just thought I saw… it's nothing. Be safe Steve. I love you."
"I love you too." She squeezed his shoulder one last time. But instead of heading off to her designated meeting point, she snuck around back to the recruitment center. Sneaking in through the backdoor. She had to damn sure she didn't see who she thought she saw. Passing a couple of the nurses in the hallway.
"Dr. Rogers?" one of them called out. Astrid turned and saw that it was. "Didn't know you were going to be here."
"Barbara didn't expect to see you here either," Astrid replied turning. She was actually one of Astrid's surgical nurses. Damn good. Would have been a surgeon if it wasn't for her gender. "I'm actually looking for Dr. Erskine."
"I think he's talking to one of the patients. Should be out soon. His office is around the corner." She pointed in the direction and Astrid nodded. Making her way over there. She found herself in an office barely bigger than a broom cupboard. Not long after managing to squeeze herself in Dr. Erskine showed up. Closing the door behind him.
"I thought I saw you earlier," he stated in German closing the door behind him. "When did you escape?"
"Not long after you did," Astrid answered leaning against his desk. "A few days afterward." She gave him a half-smile. "It is honestly good to see you alive and well. Didn't really ever expect to see you again."
"I can say the same thing about you."
"But that doesn't really matter now does it." She looked at him dead on. Crossing her arms. "All I need to know is why you are here. And I beg you to tell me it's out of the kindness of your heart."
He chuckled. "If I told you that you would see right through it." His smile turned into a frown. "What are you going to do about it?"
Astrid huffed not liking the answer. "Nothing. There is nothing I can do about it. All I ask is why then?" She stood up straight. "You've seen the effects of your serum. It destroys people."
"It was incomplete."
She rolled her eyes. "Right. Incomplete." She shook her head slightly. "If that is what it does when it's incomplete then what could it possibly do when it's finished?" The look he gave her said it all. Panic flew into her eyes. "It is finished isn't it?"
"With a little bit of your help, you know." He pointed straight at her.
"That was before I knew fully what it would do." She ran a hand through her hair. "Just why? Is the government forcing you too?"
He scoffed. "You think the government is forcing me to help defeat the people who destroyed my country. Our country."
"I'm not arguing that they shouldn't be defeated. I'm arguing that we shouldn't actively destroy lives in the attempt to do so. More so than we already are." Just watching the men line up. With no idea of what they were getting into killed her. She knew deep down it was necessary but that didn't mean she had to like it. "Otherwise, we are no better than them." She closed her eyes and let out a deep breath. "All I can ask of you is that you stop. Don't do it. I beg you not to. Nothing good can come of it."
He gripped her shoulder tightly. "Astrid, I promise you that I will only give it to a good person. One that I know you'll approve of. So that what happened doesn't happen again."
Astrid raised an eyebrow. "They put you in charge of selection?"
He nodded. "One of my conditions for working on the project." He removed his grip from her shoulder. "If I knew you would accept it, I would give it to you in a heartbeat."
Astrid let out a laugh. "Now I know that you're joking. We both know I carry too much darkness."
"Not as much as you think. I've seen your work."
"Both sides of it." Her smile slipped into a neutral expression. "Just promise me that whatever man you pick he is a good man. Not some bully the army spit out. Someone willing to put their life on the line for others. If you are going to risk people, I want it to at least have a chance of working."
"You have my word." Astrid exchanged a brief hug with him before slipping out. She couldn't stay long without getting into a whole heap of trouble. She was now running really late. As her ride reminded her off. As soon as she shut the car door they took off. Heading towards the hospital where she worked. It was there that she would be briefed on her true mission orders. After all the U.S army had a lot of use for Nazi-trained torture expert.