Archive of Our Own ^beta

It was Cartman’s idea; a Secret Santa, between the four of them, and Kenny was pretty sure it was so that he didn’t have to buy each of them a separate gift. Stan had been the one to suggest having a monetary limit on it, which seemed to put Cartman off a little. But still, they all agreed, and it at least made Kenny feel like a weight had been lifted as far as buying his friends gifts went.  

Butters was added after, a frequent member of their little group, whether he was invited or not. After him, Clyde joined, the pair of them hanging out with Stan one day who had so graciously invited him. Clyde was followed by Craig, and Token, and Tweek, and Jimmy, and Timmy, and soon there was a host of friends who had joined in on their little Secret Santa.  

Still, he would only be buying one present, as Kyle and Stan insisted as they were sat at the lunch table once. Just because the group had extended didn’t mean they were suddenly going to buy Cartman gifts unless they drew his name.  

“Maybe you will,” Stan had mocked as he nudged his arm into Kyle’s side. “You think you’re gonna be safe just because there’s more people, but you never know.”  

“I’ll get him a bag of coal,” Kyle snarled. “It’s within budget, and it’s what he gets for suggesting I shouldn’t be allowed to take part.”  

The draw was done on the Monday, giving them a week to arrange for a gift, before they broke up for the holidays on Friday. It took a bit before they each successfully had someone who wasn’t themselves, but they managed. Kenny got his first try.  

Token.   

Well, shit.  

--

“Kyle.”  

The redhead looked up, brow raised as Kenny approached him at the end of the day on Wednesday, head tilting to the side as he shut his locker. Kenny came crashing into the lockers next to him feeling a little frantic.  

“I need your help.”  

“Why?” Kyle’s brows pinched together. “Is this about the English test tomorrow?”  

“No it’s - wait, what?”  

Kyle rolled his eyes.  

“One thing at a time, one thing,” he took hold of Kyle’s shoulder. “I need help with my Secret Santa.”  

“Kenny,” the tone he used was that one specific tone that meant he was about to disapprove of something. “The idea of a Secret Santa is that it’s secret? You’re not meant to tell me anything about it.”  

“You don’t understand, I’m at a total loss. I have no idea; none! At all! I need help, Kyle, please!”  

There was something that always made his stomach flutter whenever he successfully convinced the redhead to do anything. He liked the idea that Kyle was soft on him, or for him, or – the details didn’t matter. All that mattered was knowing that Kyle made exceptions for him (and admittedly Stan, and Butters, but let’s focus on the him).  

So, when the green eyes gave an all too dramatic roll and he swore low under his breath as he pretended that this was all just so above him, despite the fact that he was about to agree, it had a smile breaking forth on Kenny’s face.  

“Don’t tell anyone, though. But we can share our Secret Santas, seeing as we didn’t get each other.”  

He supposed that meant that whatever his gift was going to be, it wasn’t from Kyle.  

“Who did you get?”  

“Token.”  

Kyle grimaced.  

“See!” Kenny threw his hands wide. “I’m allowed help!”  

“Token’s not that difficult to buy for...?”  

“Are you sure? Are you sure?”  

“He’s got lots of interests.”  

“I’m glad you think you can buy for him then, seeing as you’re going to help me.”  

Kyle shifted his bag on his shoulder. “Alright, I’ll come shopping with you then. Do you have time now? You’ve only got today and tomorrow.”  

“I do, I do!”  

“Let’s go.”  

Kenny skipped a couple of steps to keep up with the redhead who took off down the hall. “Wait, who did you get then?”  

Kyle shrugged. “Oh, just...you’ll get mad.”  

“Why?”  

“Because mine was a little easier.”  

“Did you get Cartman?”  

Kyle bit back on a guilty smile as he shook his head.  

“Who?”  

“Stan.”  

“You know what? I am mad. Fuck you.”  

He managed to convince Kyle to get on his bike, so he could cycle them into town. It was a back and forth that they’d had before, with him pulling a lot of puppy eyes and Kyle looking at the thing like it might pull out a knife and kill him. There was always one line that nailed his victory in the argument though:  

Don’t you trust me, dude?   

They made their way to the shops easily, without causing any bodily harm, and Kenny found somewhere to chain his bike and keep it hopefully safe while they shopped. Kyle was always sure to double check he’d chained the lock on properly.  

“It’s not fair,” Kenny huffed out as they started heading through the streets. “You got Stan. Stan! Of course you’ll be fine buying a gift, you know him like the back of your hand.”  

Kyle snorted. “Not all of us can be so lucky. Buying for Token can’t be that bad?”  

“How is it not bad?!” Kenny pressed. “There is literally nothing I can buy Token that he wouldn’t be able to buy himself, but better.”  

“There’s a budget on the gift for a reason, Kenny. So we’re all on a level playing field.”  

“I know, but still,” he huffed out. “What did you get Stan?”  

“Why, so you can copy me?”  

Kenny shrugged.  

Kyle rolled his eyes. “I got him a new set of headphones. He likes to have cheap ones on for when he’s driving round the farm, so that it doesn’t matter if they get busted.”  

“Ah, yes, Stan, the farmer man. It suits him, y’know, I’ve noticed him looking the part too.”  

“Don’t tell him,” Kyle advised with a pained smile. “I said it once, and he stopped speaking to me for like, two hours. Which is kind of awkward when you’re in the middle of nowhere at his farm and not getting picked up till the next morning.”  

Kenny snorted and threw an arm over Kyle’s shoulder, pulling him close and speaking low. “He does though! He’s gonna end up looking like his dad if he’s not careful.”  

That tore a bark of laughter from the redhead, who threw his head back and leant into Kenny, speaking just as low as if sharing a secret. “He totally does. One day we should try convince him to grow a moustache. I bet he’d rock it.”  

Kenny felt his insides grow warm as Kyle seemed to so naturally just mould himself into Kenny’s embrace, not trying to move away as they continued to walk down the Highstreet.  

Admittedly, when they were all first pulling Secret Santas, he had hoped he would get Kyle. He liked to buy gifts for Kyle, liked the way his eyes lit up and Kenny could point and go ‘that was me, I did that!’. He liked being able to have the chance to do something nice for the redhead for once, after all the nice things he did for Kenny.  

And, if he was honest with himself, his fondness for his childhood friend ran a little deeper than the others.  

He tried not to be honest with himself.  

Kyle was helpful, as far as shopping for Token went. They spent more time together than Kenny did with the rich kid, with more shared classes and interests. A couple of the things Kyle suggested seemed a little nerdy or lame, but he supposed he wasn’t one to judge.  

Eventually they settled on something that was in budget and also fancy enough that Kenny felt like it would suit his friend; a very, very expensive lighter.  

“He said they make him feel sophisticated,” Kyle advised. “Like, he wears a watch even though his phone does everything he needs a watch to do, because it makes him ‘feel like an adult’.”  

“He’s joined me and Craig for smokes before,” Kenny confirmed. “He does always have one.”  

“This one would suit him, wouldn’t it? It’s got gold shit on it.”  

“A zippo lighter? Hell yeah.”  

The walk back to Kenny’s bike was slow. Maybe he was dragging his feet just a little bit, but who would blame him? All he had to do after this was go home and study for their English test.  

Shit, yeah, he forgot about that.  

“Whatever happened to your helmet?” Kyle nagged as he got on his bike, the redhead scowling at him.  

“Why, you worried about me?”  

“There’s nothing wrong about being worried about your friends.”  

“I’ll be fine,” Kenny assured. “I’m a safe rider. You’d know, if you-?”  

Kyle punched him in the arm before he could finish, colour in his cheeks. “Shut up, don’t finish that sentence.”  

“Aw, Kyle, shutting me down before I even begin?” Kenny grinned at the flustered face. “You break my heart.”  

“Fuck off.”  

Sure, he tried not to be honest with himself. He tried not to admit the exact nature of his friendship with Kyle, and the feelings he had buried deep, deep, deep down somewhere. And he did try not to flirt, but...  

It was hard when Kyle made it so much fun.  

“Stan’s texting me,” Kyle said as he filled the silence.  

“Is he, or are you just trying to escape me?”  

“No, he has been, I’ve just been ignoring him.”  

Kenny felt a rush of pride. “Ignoring your best friend for little old me?”  

“Don’t tell him. You know how needy he is.”  

“Ha! I wouldn’t dream of it.”  

Kyle took a few steps back. “Go on then, go wrap your gift.”  

It was always hard to leave Kyle, especially when those green eyes looked at him like he was the only person in the world.  

--

Friday made him nervous. He did want to get Token’s gift right, and it made him nervous knowing that he didn’t really know if he’d be able to measure up. So he decided it’d be the first thing he did.  

He found the boy, wrapped box in his hands, and gave his least-nervous smile as he offered it.  

“Hey, dude. I’m - uh – your Secret Santa.”  

Token’s face lit up in a smile as he took the gift. “Oh man, thanks, Kenny! Can I open it now?”  

Kenny shrugged as he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I don’t see why not. Cartman never said we couldn’t open them right away.”  

Token tore into the paper with enough enthusiasm that it put Kenny’s nerves at ease as he laughed at his friend.  

“Kenny, this is so cool! Thanks, man, I love it!”  

They spent the ten minutes spare they had before class round the back of the building, sharing a cigarette between them and chatting about who Token had got, and what he’d got them, before they parted ways.  

That just meant the rest of the day would be him waiting for whoever his Secret Santa was to bring him his gift.  

The next gift he witnessed the exchange of was Stan’s. They were heading to class together chattering away, and Kenny resisted the urge to ask if Stan had already received his, because he wasn’t technically meant to know, when Clyde approached them with a flourish and a Merry Christmas!!  

Kenny frowned as he watched Clyde pass a wrapped gift over to Stan, big smile on his face as he announced he was Stan’s Secret Santa. Stan tore the thing open, hyping at the brunette about the rare trading cards he’d been bought, that Clyde admitted were more of a fluke of luck than successfully buying something good.  

“They were in budget and you like nerdy shit, so I figured that made it a pretty safe bet, right?”  

As soon as Clyde left them, leaving Kenny and Stan standing together as Stan put the gift somewhere safe, Kenny opened his mouth.  

“Kyle told me he was your Secret Santa,” Kenny explained.  

Stan rolled his eyes. “Dude, you can’t tell each other who you’ve got. I knew that’s what you were doing when he said you were in town. It ruins the surprise if you know who doesn’t have you.”  

“But, he lied?” Kenny gestured to the gift Stan was shoving into his backpack. “Because Clyde had you?”  

“Yeah, so who do you think he had?”  

Kenny hesitated.  

“Dumbass. C’mon, let’s get to class.”  

He didn’t want to let himself get his hopes up. Maybe Kyle did have Cartman, and just didn’t want to admit it because he knew Kenny would tear into him (he would), so had lied about having Stan. As more of the day progressed and he watched Craig approach Cartman and hand over a small gift that Cartman announced was way under budget, that idea was brushed under the rug.  

Maybe he had...Butters?  

The day continued, and Kenny didn’t see the redhead for any of it. He didn’t know if Kyle was avoiding him, but whatever it was only served to make Kenny begin to hope. Because no one else had approached him with a gift.  

As he finished sorting out his shit at his locker, someone approached him.  

His heart sank.  

“Hey, Tweek,” he greeted as the blonde got close. He prepared himself to force a smile on his face because it wasn’t Tweek’s fault that he wasn’t who Kenny had hoped he would get.  

But Tweek didn’t produce a gift.  

“Kyle was looking for you,” Tweek explained. “He’s outside, round where the bike shed is.”  

“Oh...” Kenny felt a lump begin to form in his throat. “Did he tell you why?”  

“I dunno. I was looking for him, to give him his gift, and he was there waiting for you I think, and said that if I saw you could I let you know that he was looking for you? Which, I have, so I’m gonna go, so you can go see him,” Tweek gestured over his shoulder. “Have fun, enjoy your gift or whatever.”  

“Thanks, dude.”  

A skittish wave and the blonde was gone, leaving Kenny to stare after him where the door to the building was, and the path to the bike shed.  

He couldn’t walk fast enough.  

He picked up speed as he saw his friend leaning against where his bike was, box by his feet as he tapped away on his phone, green eyes pinned to the screen. Kenny felt his heart lurch as they looked up once Kenny started to jog over to him, a smile gracing the pale face as he waited.  

“You’re a big liar.”  

Kyle get out a bark of laughter at Kenny’s greeting, brow twitching with amusement. “I take it Stan got given his gift?”  

“Yeah, by Clyde!”  

“What did you expect, for me to just tell you?” Kyle asked with a grin. “That would’ve ruined the surprise.”  

“I trusted you.”  

“Sounds like a you problem.”  

Kenny’s eyes flickered down to the box by Kyle’s feet.  

“Did Token like his gift?”  

“What?” Kenny snapped back up. “Oh, yeah, he did. Thanks, for helping.”  

“No problem. I’m glad it went down well.”  

Blue eyes flickered down to the gift, and then back up to Kyle expectantly.  

The redhead began to chuckle. “Go on, then. It’s for you.”  

He crouched down on the floor with a smile beginning to spread across his face as he tore at the wrapping paper. It was the biggest gift he’d seen so far – which sure didn’t necessarily mean it would be the best, but it sure meant it was likely to be the best.  

Kyle crouched down next to him.  

Kenny stopped once he’d finished unwrapping the present. He looked down to see the item staring back up at him and felt his throat run dry.  

“I know it’s out of budget,” Kyle admitted. “But I couldn’t think of anything else. And I know that you gave your bike helmet to Karen last month after she broke the strap, so I thought...”  

He glanced up to see the redhead shrug, green eyes looking everywhere away from Kenny.  

“I dunno. I hope it’s okay?”  

“I can’t believe you bought something out of budget,” was all Kenny could think to say. “Cartman’s gonna flip.”  

“Cartman can shove his dumbass rules up his ass.”  

Kenny pulled the helmet out and began to marvel at it. It felt unreal, even if it was a very basic, simple design. Just a regular, black bicycle helmet. “I meant it you know, when I said I’d be fine without one.”  

“You’re lucky that you haven’t been hit by a car already, jackass. You bike round at night, when Stan’s dad is on the road.”  

He gave a low chuckle as he looked up, to find the green eyes finally looking his way.  

“I...” Kyle pursed his lips as he chose his next words. “I wasn’t sure what else I could get you that wasn’t this, once the idea was in my head.”  

Kenny put the helmet back into the box as a smile twitched his cheeks and he leant forward with a waggle of his eyebrows. “Oh, I think I can think of a few things that are in budget.”  

He expected the usual reaction; a flustered dismissal, maybe a punch to the arm, that badly hidden smile that Kenny would pretend not to notice. That wasn’t what he got.  

Kyle steeled himself, eyes narrowing, and there was something about the air that left Kenny feeling a little out of his depth. He watched as Kyle sucked in a breath and his eyes widened as the redhead began to get closer.  

He was stunned. Rooted to the spot. Left clutching the box in his hands as Kyle’s fingers wrapped round his forearms and he leant in close. Blue eyes wide as they watched green get closer. Close enough he could see the freckles that splashed across his nose. Close enough that he could hear his heart in his ears as-!  

“What?” Kyle smirked as he stopped once their noses bumped together. “All bark, no bite?”  

Kenny opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.  

“Who would’ve thought you’d get all flustered from just this?” Kyle mused as he began to pull back. “Guess you’re just full of hot air.”  

Kenny dropped the box.  

He grasped out, getting a handful of Kyle’s shirt as he yanked the redhead forward in a desperate attempt to keep him close and ended up with his knees in the snow below. He grimaced as their noses knocked harshly, giving a bark of laughter as Kyle swore low. It wasn’t smooth, the opposite really, and he half expected Kyle to back out still.  

But he didn’t. The redhead recovered, giving an exasperated huff as he looked up with that usual lopsided smile and twitch of his brow that promised he thought Kenny was an absolute dumbass, but in the most affectionate way.  

“Where’s all the bravado gone?”  

“I could ask you the same thing,” Kyle mused.  

“You just caught me off guard.”  

“Sure, that’s what it was.”  

Kenny licked his lips and felt a rush of confidence as he watched the green eyes ahead of him flicker down to follow the action. It was the confidence he needed to push himself forward.  

So he did.  

He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t imagined what it would be like, to kiss Kyle. He’d thought about it a lot, in a lot of different ways. What their first kiss would be like. What their second, and third, and fourth. Reality didn’t disappoint.  

Here, with snow soaking into his jeans, awkwardly leaning across the box half between them, crouching between the bikes in the bike shed, with a chaste kiss that suited Kyle perfectly. All chapped lips and dry skin. All electricity and built-up frustrations.  

He pulled back and looked up with a lopsided smile, pleased to see his happiness mirrored back at him.  

He heard the distant sound of Stan’s voice, telling Cartman that Tweek had told him they were at the bike shed. He made no effort to move away.  

“Happy holidays, Kenny,” Kyle whispered, breath ghosting across his lips as the green eyes looked up through red lashes.  

“You too.”  

The redhead pulled back, standing up as the friends who had called them turned the corner, Kenny moving to collect his gift from the ground. If they suspected anything, it didn’t show on their faces.  

Stan gave Kyle his usual half-hug of greeting as Cartman peered round him to see what gift Kenny had been given. It didn’t surprise him that the brunette was instantly on Kyle’s case about splashing out beyond the budget, while Butters gave a coo of happiness as he pointed out that Kenny lost his old helmet.  

As their friends started to cart them off, Kenny met Kyle’s eyes. There was a smile playing at the corner of the redhead’s lips that Kenny was sure matched the one on his face.  

There was a conversation they still needed to have, and a confession that Kenny needed to give, but in that moment? It felt good, having this little secret between the two of them.  

Just the two of them.