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Watching the two of them set Katsuki’s teeth on edge.
And not for any obnoxious alpha bullshit reason either because despite what everyone thinks, seeing two omegas together all happy and lovey-dovey doesn’t hurt Katuski’s pride the way it would some other useless alpha. He is not that obtuse about this shit.
It’s just- something. About the two of them. Together.
And separately.
Fuck, okay, Deku and Todoroki just freak him the fuck out, and he can’t figure out why.
It’s not like he’s scared of that little nerd or that candy cane bastard- hell no, abso-fucking-lutely not. He just can’t stand to look at them or smell them or be in the same room with them because something about them just sets him off.
His skin gets buzzy, and his heart races, and his palms start sweating even more than usual, and everything about it is just completely fucking unpleasent.
“Dude,” Kirishima doesn’t even look up from his Switch, “quit freaking out, you just have a crush on them.”
“What?”
“I said, you just have a crush-” Kirishima finally looks up, and pauses because he sees Katsuki looking completely fucking normal and defintiely not freaking out about the idea having a crush on two of his best friends like some sort of grade schooler.
Because that’s ridiculous.
Completely insane.
He does not-
“Oh, you didn’t realize, huh, buddy?” Kirishima laughs, the bastard. The wrong, shitty haired, completely mistaken, idiotic bastard.
“Shut the hell up,” he snarls back, ignoring how his hands are slicking with sweat and his heart is stuttering uncomfortably in his chest. “I do not.”
“Aw, bro!” Kirishima tosses the Switch aside so that he can swing an arm around Katsuki’s shoulders. Katsuki snaps at him, but Kirishima just smiles. “No judgement here! Crushes are normal, y’know? And fun!”
“Nothing about this is fun-”
“Crushes are so fun! You get to be all excited and you have something to look forward to every day and then there’s the whole build-up until you confess-”
“Shitty Hair,” Katsuki enunciates this slowly, so the dumbass understands how dumb he’s being. “In case you forgot, they’re dating. It’s pointless to have a crush on them, which I don’t, when they’re so disgustingly in love with each other. Any hopeless idiot crushing on them wouldn’t even have a shot in hell.”
“Oh, yeah, okay, that’s a good point,” Kirishima hums out. “But, I mean, have you asked them?”
“Asked them what?”
“If they would be interested in dating you too. O-or anyone who might possibly have a crush on them hypothetically!” Kirishima is quick to add on when he sees Katsuki bare his teeth in a snarl.
“No,” Katsuki grits out. His patience is rapidly thinning, and he regrets ever bringing this up. “I have not asked them if they’re interested in dating another person because I’m not a fucking creep.”
“Well, I’m just saying it’s not impossible.” Kirishima gives his shoulder one last squeeze before picking the Switch back up. “Cause, y’know, before they started dating, I would have bet money on Midoriya having a crush on you. Like it was pretty obvious, man.”
“What!?”
---
Katsuki decides to do some reconnaissance. He finds the perfect opportunity - Deku and Icyhot spread out together in the common room, as alone as they can be in a dorm full of other students, just talking. Katsuki intends to just sneak by them into the kitchen where he can do some light observation and eavesdropping.
It’s the perfect plan.
The only problem is the whole heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness of being in the same room with them is a little distracting. And that Deku doesn’t know how to leave him the fuck alone even when his boyfriend is sitting right there.
Katsuki swears the stupid nerd must have some sort of Katsuki-sensor built into his brain because his head whips around to smile at him as soon as Katuski steps through the doorway. Katsuki determinedly ignores how that increases his heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness as well as how easily the nerd gets him to join them.
He at least leaves them alone on the couch, despite Deku’s insistence to join them, and braces himself for the worst in the armchair next to them.
“Did you get to watch the new episode yet?” The nerd is basically draping himself over the edge of the couch so that he’s in as much of Katsuki’s space as possible. The dumb sun is hitting his dumb eyes and making them sparkle. He smells like a whole ass bakery. Katsuki hates his life. “I know you said you were studying when it aired last night, but did you watch in your room? Because it was so good. Right, Todoroki?”
“Mmhm,” the candy-cane bastard hums out from where he’s laying his head on Midoriya’s lap, not even bothering to open his eyes. The sun must be personally out to ruin Katsuki’s life because a shaft of sunlight is perfectly positioned on Todoroki’s face. It makes his complexion look dewy and golden, and his eyelashes cast shadows down his cheeks. He’s so perfect that Katsuki considers killing him right then and there.
“Right!” The nerd pauses to smile softly down at Todoroki. He runs his fingers gently through the bi-colored strands, brushing them away from his face, and Katsuki can’t rip his stare away from them. Todoroki cracks an eye open just enough to smile back as a soft purr comes rumbling out of his chest, and his cinnamon tea scent puffs out into the air. Their two scents become thick, cloying almost, as they mix in the air, and Katsuki has to swallow down the sudden rush of saliva that floods his mouth. “So have you watched it yet?”
Katsuki can barely hear him over the pounding of his heart. Fucking hell, he’s feeling lightheaded- these bastards are killing him. “What?”
“The show, Kacchan.” Deku’s smile is patient and beatific, and Katsuki simultaneously wants to punch it and kiss it.
“No,” he snaps out. He rips his eyes away from them in an attempt to get his useless brain back on track. “I told you- unlike some of you, I have more important shit to do than watch some dumb cartoon.”
“Watch it with us?” Todoroki asks, and the shitty bastard must be using his quirk because Katsuki feels his skin flush. He turns to glare at him, maybe bare his teeth a little, but the stupid, attractive bastard catches him off gaurd because his eyes are open and that piercing gaze is turned directly on him.
“W-what?” He sputters out. “Hell no, didn’t you hear what I just said-”
“That’s a great idea!” Deku sends a beaming smile his way, and Katsuki’s mouth snaps shut. “And you’re free right now, aren’t you, Kacchan? I can pull it up on my laptop real quick!”
Deku is up and off the couch before Katsuki can even blink. “What- no! Listen to me, damnit-”
“Katsuki,” and what the hell, Todoroki can’t just say his name in his stupid drowsy voice like that, “just watch it with us. We want you to.”
“Please, Kacchan?”
That’s- no, this is so unfair. They can’t team up against him like this. This was just supposed to be reconnaissance, not- whatever the hell this is turning into. He opens his mouth to tell them off, “Gah- fine. I’ll watch your stupid cartoon with you losers.”
Their answering smiles make him feel like he’s lost something important. His pride, maybe.
Shit, shit, shit.
---
Okay, so the reconnaissance didn’t work out as planned. But it wasn’t a complete waste of time because seeing the nerd cry over the episode ending was funny as hell, and that, you know, spending time with his friends, even ones that make him feel a certain heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness, isn’t totally useless and boring or something.
Whatever.
The point is that he still doesn’t know what to do about these weird ass feelings, and he still doesn’t have any concrete evidence about this supposed crush of Deku’s.
The nerd in question was going through the training exercises on the field now, and Katsuki settles back in his spot in the grass to watch him. He at least has the excuse of watching him for training purposes so he doesn’t have to feel guilty about his staring.
He’s trying not to smile as the nerd copies another one of his moves when his view is suddenly blocked by Todoroki's slim form.
“...what do you want?”
“Can I borrow your jacket?” Todoroki holds out his hand expectantly and something about his self-assured demeanor is making his eyebrow twitch.
“Hah?” Katsuki grunts out. “The hell you need a jacket for?”
“I’m cold.”
Katsuki stares at him, waiting for the punchline, because he can not possibly be serious right now. But the fucker just stares at him with his guileless eyes and keeps his hand outstretched. All the extended eye contact is making his heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness start back up. It’s like he’s living in a nightmare.
“Then fix it, dipshit,” Katsuki finally snaps since Todoroki isn’t budging. “Do your temperature regulation shit and leave me alone.”
The idiot has the audacity to look surprised, like he forgot his own quirk existed. It’s stupid and cute and Katsuki hates him.
“That’s- no... I can’t.” Todoroki’s lying, obviously, but the fact that he can’t even be semi-convincing about it is annoying as hell. It’s definitely not cute. It’s not.
“You can’t?” Katsuki says slowly, again, since he is apparently dealing exclusively with idiots these days. “You can’t use your quirk?”
“No, that’s not what I meant.” Todoroki sighs, finally dropping his hand. His bottom lip pushes forward just the tiniest bit into a pout, and the heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness ramps up to a 10. “Just… I just don’t want to. Can I please have your jacket?”
“Fine.” Katsuki definitely didn’t mean to say ‘fine.’ He meant to tell this idiot to fuck off and leave him alone, but no matter how much he yells at his brain to say it, it insists on ignoring him. It also insists on stripping off his jacket and shoving it toward Todoroki despite the fact that it’s windy as hell and that Katsuki is wearing it for a reason.
Fuck.
The bastard has the gall to look smug as he slips it on, but the snarky remark he wants to say dies on his tongue as the smell of cinnamon tea suffuses the air.
Todoroki gets this small, stupid, cute smile on as he zips it up, tucking his chin into the collar, ands Katsuki has to grit his teeth together to keep from making some dumb alpha noise at the sight of it.
“Thank you, Katsuki.”
“Whatever.”
Todoroki stares at him for another moment before stepping forward and settling down next to him in the grass.
Katsuki side-eyes him and wills his cheeks not to blush. “The hell you think you’re doing?”
“Sitting next to you.”
“Well, don’t be annoying about it.”
“Of course, Katsuki.”
---
“Deku,” he growls out, low and pissed. “What the hell is that?”
“K-Kacchan!” He yelps out, surprised. He avoids Katsuki’s gaze as he stalks over to him, shrinking down in his chair as if he could hide. “I-it’s, um, it’s your jacket?”
“Yeah, my jacket. Why the hell is it on your body?” Katsuki towers over the smaller boy, glowering and puffed up in indignation.
“U-um, well, you see, I saw Shouto wearing it, and it looked so warm and soft and comfy, and you know how hard it is to find jackets that don’t irritate my skin, so I asked him if I could borrow it, and he said yes and gave it to me, and then I noticed that it was yours. But then it was just as soft and comfy as I thought it would be, and it smelled good, so I thought I would just wear it for a little bit, I swear, and um, yeah. T-that’s it.” Deku cowers as he finishes his rambling, tucking his chin in the collar of the jacket in the same stupid way that his boyfriend did yesterday. Katsuki refuses to have it work twice on him, but his stupid brain keeps replaying Deku’s ‘and it smlled good’ comment on max volume.
He shoves down the useless alpha instincts that are going crazy and not influencing him in any way in the slightest, and reaches forward, tugging roughly at one of the stray curls falling across his forehead. “Ask next time then. Don’t just steal my shit, Shitty Nerd.”
Deku stares up at him, mouth open and surprised, before his eyes go big and watery and star-filled. He sits up, a big, stupid grin on his face to match his wide-eyed stare, as a happy vanilla scent floats up and wraps around Katsuki like a hug. “Sure, Kacchan!”
Katsuki does not go soft, and he does not shove his nose against Deku’s skinny, freckled neck to get more of that sweet scent no matter how cacophonously his alpha instincts are yelling at him to.
---
He does not get his jacket back.
Instead, he inexplicably ends up with one of Deku’s oversized hoodies being shoved into his hands.
Katsuki heaves in a deep breath, using all his self-restraint and anger management training not to blow the ugly thing up where he stands. “Deku. Listen. I do not want your shitty hoodie. Just give me my goddamn jacket back.”
“Kacchan!” Deku’s answering gasp is shocked and offended, as if Katsuki just insulted his mother. “This is a limited edition golden-age All Might hoodie from America. It is not some sh- some crappy hoodie.”
“Oh my god, just say shitty, you’re not a grade schooler,” Katsuki groans.
“No! I’m a hero, and heroes are family-friendly. I’m not going to start a bad habit,” Deku huffs out. “Besides, it’ll look good on you! It matches your eyes and everything.”
Katsuki is not some incompentent, lovesick idiot whose brain shuts down from a simple compliment. He’s not. He just needs a second to process it, is all.
The nerd takes advantage of Katsuki’s surprise, spinning away from him with a smile, and quick call over his shoulder. “Don’t blow it up, please! It cost me a year’s allowance to ship from America!”
Katsuki’s brain comes back online.
“Oi!”
---
Katsuki is not wearing the damn hoodie. He wouldn’t wear the gaudy thing for a goddamn million dollars.
He does smell it though. By accident, obviously, but it would have been impossible to ignore once he got to the confines of his dorm room anyway.
Deku’s sweet, buttery, vanilla scent is the most obvious, but Todoroki’s richer cinnamon undertones are there too. The mix of them is both intoxicating and comforting, and it settles some anxious, angry piece of Katsuki that he didn’t even know was there.
A satisfied sound rumbles deep in his chest, and Katsuki picks up the hoodie to inhale the smell of the fabric deeply, savoring it.
What the fuck-
He freezes, his brain slowly catching up with his actions, and throws the hoodie across his room in a panic. He glares at the offending piece of fabric as the heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness reaches new heights.
What the fuck are they trying to pull with this? If Katsuki didn’t know any better, he would think the two of them purposely scented the damn thing before giving it to him.
But that’s crazy-
That would mean-
And they wouldn’t-
Katsuki growls, stomping across his room to pick the damn thing back up. He should burn it. The little nerd would deserve it for whatever trick they’re trying to pull on him with this crap.
It’s tempting, it really is.
He shoves it under his pillow instead.
---
“You ever gonna give me my jacket back?”
Todoroki tips his head back on the sofa to look at him, considering. “Maybe. Izuku would be heartbroken though. He loves this jacket.”
“So!?” Katsuki snaps back, exasperated by this whole escapade. “It’s my fucking jacket!”
“So I’m not going to break my boyfriend’s heart,” Todoroki explains with a shrug. Then he gets this look in his eyes that gets Katsuki immediately on the defensive. “Though you can take it back yourself if you really want it.”
“What?”
Todoroki fucking grins, shifting around on the couch to face Katsuki fully. “Fight me for it.”
“What the hell- no, you fucking, lunatic!” Katsuki snaps, even though he really is itching for a rematch with this bastard. “You wanna get suspended for a week like your boyfriend?”
Todoroki narrows his eyes at that, saying, “That was your fault. You’re the one that started it.”
“I- that was- that’s not the fucking point!”
The bastard sighs, like he’s bored of the conversation. “You know, we don’t have to use quirks. Not everything has to be so extreme.”
“What then? You want to fucking wrestle for it?” Katsuki growls, but he can’t deny how excited he is by the prospect of it. Not that IcyHot has to know that.
“Yes.”
“What are you, five?”
Todoroki’s smile drops, and he turns back around on the couch. “Guess I’ll just be keeping your jacket then.”
“Now, I didn’t say ‘no,’ you fucker.”
Now five minutes later, Katsuki has some regrets.
He may have underestimated Todoroki’s hand-to-hand capabilities. It may have slipped his mind that Todoroki was trained since birth by the Number One hero. Maybe he should have considered his heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness as a significant disadvantage.
“Sorry, Katsuki,” Todoroki pants above him, victorious and smug. “Looks like we’re keeping the jacket.”
Katsuki chokes out a wordless cry- of anger, damnit. Not of anything else because he is not in the least bit overwhelmed by having a sweating, flushed omega perched over him, his scent practically dripping down onto him and smothering him.
“What’s the matter, Katsuki? No snappy comeback?” The bastard is fucking taunting him, but damnit, it’s like his mouth is stuffed with cotton or something. Katsuki glares up at him and hopes the bastard gets the message.
But Todoroki just laughs, head tilting to the side as he mocks him, and Katsuki’s eyes zero in on the smooth expanse of neck he’s showing off. It’s perfect, of course, just like the rest of him; smooth and creamy colored and absolutely perfect for his mark.
His instincts go crazy, and Katsuki finally lets out a strangled sounding “Fuck off.”
He’s not entirely sure if he’s talking to himself or Todoroki, but the bastard finally takes mercy on him and rolls off.
“Everything okay, Katsuki?” The question is mocking, Todoroki’s face still smug and- and knowing, fuck.
Did that bastard do that on purpose?
Katsuki’s face flames, and he rolls to his feet, stomping off and not dignifying that question with an answer.
Todoroki’s laugh follows him up the stairs because Katsuki’s life is officially a joke.
---
Katsuki is this close to figuring out this damn math problem when someone knocks on his door.
He startles at the sound, his pencil scratching across his paper, ruining his work. He slams his pencil down, all hopes of solving it flying out the window. He’s going to murder whoever is outside his door and nothing is going to stop him.
“I swear to god, Shitty Hair, if this is about that stupid game-” Katsuki freezes mid-rant, surprised to find someone other than Shitty Hair outside his door.
Todoroki stares at him from the other side, his only expression a small uptick to the corner of his lips. “Good evening, Katsuki.”
Katsuki rolls his eyes, shifting to lean his weight against his doorframe. “Whaddya want?”
“Hey, Kacchan!” Deku’s mop of green curls pop out from behind Todoroki, and Katsuki prepares himself for the worst.
“We made you something,” Todoroki says and extends a delicately wrapped box his way. Katsuki is too mentally unprepared to do anything but take it.
“Well, Todoroki made you something,” Deku says with a shy grin as he slips his hand into his boyfriend’s. “I mainly tried not to mess things up too badly.”
“You helped,” Todoroki reassures him, bumping his hip gently against his. “It was your idea after all.”
“No way, I couldn’t have done this without you-”
“What the hell is it?” Katsuki interrupts before they can get any more disgustingly sappy.
“Open it, Kacchan!” Deku is practically bouncing in place, eyes gleaming like a kid on Christmas. Even IcyHot is eyeing him closely, as close to eager as he’s ever seen him outside of hero training and anything related to Deku.
It’s making him nervous. But just in the heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness way that he’s getting somewhat acclimated to with how often it’s happening.
He yanks off the pretty wrapping, tossing it into the room behind him, to find a white, non-threatening box. He slides the top off to reveal… food balls?
He raises an eyebrow at them as he picks one up and eyes it. The food ball is small, about golf ball sized, covered with oats and smelling faintly of peanut butter, and Katsuki has no idea what the hell they’re supposed to be.
“They’re snacks!” Deku chirps out, excited. “We tried to make cookies at first, but I accidently used bread flour instead of all purpose flour, which made them this super weird texture, and then I burnt them, so it was just a disaster all around. But then we realized that you really don’t have much of a sweet tooth, so cookies probably wouldn’t be the best gift anyway. So then I thought a healthy snack might be better, and we found this recipe! Todoroki took the lead on making these, so they should be safe to eat. Try one!”
Katsuki pops one hesitantly into his mouth before he can think better of it. And they’re… fine. Definitely edible. A little too gritty in texture to be good, but the flavor isn’t terrible.
And the thing is, he wants to make fun of them. On a normal day, he would absolutely roast them and their mediocre cooking skills. Maybe even walk them down to the kitchen and show them how much better he can make them.
But his dumb, ridiculous, useless instincts don’t want him to. Instead, they’re telling him to do that dumb, pleased rumble from before, to hide this present away and keep it somewhere safe.
He settles on letting out a gruff “...they’re not that bad.”
Deku beams, and even Todoroki gives a big, genuine smile, and the alpha inside him puffs up with satisfaction at seeing those looks on their faces.
Stupid, stupid, stupid-
“What a relief!” Deku laughs, sagging against Todoroki. “We didn’t know if you would even try one to be honest. We kinda thought you would throw them away on sight.”
“Course not,” he grumbles, distraught at even the thought of that. Fuck, he’s in so deep. “Why the hell did you make me something in the first place?”
Deku’s suddenly shy, blushing and ducking his head to mumble something incomprehensible under his breath.
Todoroki huffs out a fond laugh before turning to Katsuki with the lightest dusting of pink on his cheeks to simply say, “We wanted to.”
---
“Here, Kacchan!” Deku pops in front of his desk, eyes shining and hand outstretched.
“Hah?” Katsuki eyes him suspiciously because he can’t be too careful these days. The two of them are getting way too powerful for their own good.
“I got this for you,” he explains, eyes crinkling shut in a smile. “Todoroki and I were at the mall yesterday, and I was doing one of those gachapon games- you know, like the ones we used to play when we were little? I wanted to get the new All Might figurine they released, but it, ah, took a few tries. But I finally got it, see!?”
The dork spins around, proudly showing off the new keychain swinging from his backpack, and Katsuki does his best to stifle the dumb smile trying to grow on his face.
“It’s amazing, right!? So I thought I would get you one too!” Deku spins back around, shoving his hand back in front of Katsuki’s face. The figurine is nestled in his palm, and Katsuki isn’t excited, damnit.
He’s not! He’s not some fanboy like Deku, he doesn’t need that kind of useless shit-
He picks it out of Deku’s palm, not blushing as their hands brush, and he’s not gruff from trying to suppress the rumble threatening to burst out of his chest. He just has something in his throat, okay!?
“Whatever, nerd. You spend your whole allowance on this shit?”
“W-well, not all of it,” Deku laughs, eyes following Katsuki as he clips it onto his own backpack. He just doesn’t have anywhere else to put it, damnit.
“...thanks, I guess,” he mumbles. “Now go sit down, I’m sick of looking at your fucking face.”
“Sure, Kacchan!” Deku beams, glowing and happy, and fuck, it’s not cute at all.
And his hand does not drift down to fiddle with the stupid keychain during class.
---
“Are you cold, Katsuki?”
“Maybe if I had my fucking jacket-”
“Here,” Todoroki unwinds the scarf from around his neck, wrapping it around Katsuki before he can even finish his sentence.
Katsuki blinks, cinnamon tea puffing up rich and warm around him. His cheeks flush with the sudden warmth.
“What the fuck-”
But Todoroki is gone, stepping ahead of him to slip his hand back into his boyfriend’s.
Katsuki tucks his chin into the soft warmth of the cashmere because he’s cold. Not for any other reason, and definitely not to hide any sort of smile.
---
“Here, try this one, Kacchan!”
Katsuki opens his mouth on instinct, and Deku pops another of his weird-ass food balls into his mouth.
“Don’t put matcha in ‘em,” he mumbles around his mouthful. “It tastes like grass.”
“It’s healthy for you, Kacchan,” Deku scolds like he’s his old hag or something. “It’s not good to be picky about foods, you know.”
“Whatever, mom,” he mocks back, but Deku just rolls his eyes and holds out another one of his concoctions.
Katsuki opens his mouth.
---
“We’d thought you’d like this, Katsuki.”
-
“What do you think of this flavor, Kacchan?”
-
“Red looks good on you, Katsuki. You should wear it more often.”
-
“Listen, Kacchan! I didn’t steal this one! You left it on your desk, and I just didn’t want anyone else to take it. A-and I was cold, so I slipped it on, but I didn’t steal it.”
-
Non-stop heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness.
---
They just keep giving him shit. And wearing his shit. And just doing weird shit.
He’s practically drowning in vanilla and cinnamon and compliments and mediocre snacks and shiny trinkets and soft things that smell like them and gah-
Katsuki is pretty sure he’s going crazy because he can’t figure out what the hell it all means.
“Dude, seriously?” Kirishima laughs at him without looking up from his game, and Katsuki is hit with a wave of deja vu. It pisses him off. “Do you really not get it?”
“Get what?”
“Oh man,” Kirishima pauses the game to laugh even harder at him, and Katsuki tackles him to the floor. They fall with a thud and a tangle of limbs, and Katsuki straddles him and grips his shirt in a fist to yell at him.
“What the hell are you laughing about!?”
“D-dude!” The bastard is all but in hysterics, holding his sides as he loses it. “C’mon, man! Even I’m not that dense!”
“Who’re you calling dense?” Katsuki growls, shoving against his shoulders.
“You, dude! They’ve been courting you for, like, a month now!”
Katsuki freezes, heart constricting in his chest. “What did you say?”
Kirishima smiles, all soft and gentle like Katsuki is a fucking child or something, as he asks, “You really couldn’t tell? All the gifts and food and scenting and all that? It’s, like, textbook stuff, man.”
“No way,” Katsuki says. He shakes his head, rolling off of Kirishima and all his stupid, ridiculous, completely idiotic ideas. “There’s no fucking way.”
“Yes, way! I mean, isn’t this good?” Kirishima sits up, smiling and encouraging like the idiot he is.
“How the fuck is this even remontely good?”
“Because you like them! Right? Because, I mean, you’ve been pretty receptive to their advances and stuff, so I think everyone kinda thought you were into it. Midoriya and Todoroki included.” Kirishima frowns for the first time, watching as Katsuki’s face becomes more and more horrified.
“Fuck,” he whispers. “No- what? Fuck.”
“You good, dude?”
“Of course not!” He throws his head back with a groan, absolutely furious. “They’ve been courting me for a month, and I’ve been sitting on my ass like an absolute bastard! Fuck!”
“So... you aren’t good?”
“Fucking fuck,” Katsuki growls. He whips his head toward Kirishima, who flinches back in shock. “You.”
“Haha, e-easy there, buddy,” Kirishima laughs shakily, scooting back slowly. “You’re, uh, coming on a little strong there.”
Katsuki launches himself at Kirishima, tackling him to the ground and towering over him. “You said this was textbook shit, right? Well, get me it. I’m not fucking this up anymore.”
“U-um, you know I didn’t mean an actual textbook, right?”
---
Katsuki isn’t fucking this up.
After his enlightening talk with Kirishima, it takes him basically the rest of the day to prepare everything he needs. But, oh, is Katsuki prepared.
He’s going to woo the shit out of them.
He stomps down the hall to Deku’s room, where the two of them are undoubtedly curled up together. In his arms, he has the softest blanket he owns, freshly washed and thoroughly scented, three silver necklaces, carefully selected for both aesthetic and durability, and homemade cookies, fresh from the oven that actually taste good.
“Oi!” He kicks at the door, his arms too full of shit to do anything else. “Open up!”
The door swings open to Deku’s beaming face. “Kacchan! What’s… up?”
Katsuki watches as Deku’s eyes trace over the gifts in his arms before he turns his wide-eyed stare up to Katsuki himself. He sees Todoroki’s head pop up from the covers in interest, and Katsuki smirks. “Prepared to be wooed, motherfuckers.”
“K-kacchan?” Deku stumbles back as Katsuki barges into his room. He carefully sets his presents on the bed, arranging them to his liking.
“Now since you bastards decided to keep the fact that you were courting me to yourselves, I’m doing all of this out of order. Any complaints?” Katsuki glares at them, daring them to even think about it.
“N-nope, no complaints here, Kacchan!” Deku squeezes in next to Todoroki on the bed, and he has this stupid, wobbly smile plastered across his face. It’s adorable, and Katsuki isn’t afraid to admit it this time.
“Icyhot?”
“Of course not, Katsuki,” Todoroki says, all soft and indulgent. He tilts his head onto Deku’s shoulder, smiling as he looks up at him, and the two of them together is the cutest shit he’s ever seen.
“Alright, then let’s fucking do this.”
He grabs the blanket first, since exchanging scented articles of clothing is the initial stage of the whole courting process. “Since you bastards have half my fucking closet at this point, I didn’t exactly have anything else to give you both. But you guys nest together, right? So I thought that you could add this to it. If you wanted. It’s, um, the softest one I have.”
He finishes the explanation in a mumble, and fucking hell, why is his confidence disappearing on him now? They’re courting him, for fuck’s sake, it’s not like they’re going to turn him down at this point. But that doesn’t stop the heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness from hitting him like a goddamn train as he extends the blanket toward them.
He can’t breathe in the seconds before they respond. Then Deku lunges forward, snatching the blanket out hands and burying his face in it. Todoroki, as always, is more restrained as he reaches for a corner and rubs his cheek against the soft sherpa lining.
Katsuki isn’t sure who starts first, but soon the room is filled with the sound of their rumbling purrs, and Katsuki’s breath wooshes out of him in relief.
“It’s perfect, Kacchan, thank you so much,” Deku’s cries are a bit muffled by the blanket, but Katsuki gets the gist of it. Todoroki just hums his agreement, gently taking the blanket from Deku to wrap it around them both.
Fuck, it’s adorable.
Exchanging food gifts, to prove their ability to care and provide for each other or some shit, is next, so he shoves the cookies their way, and Todoroki gently undoes all of his painstaking wrapping. “I made these myself, so you bet your asses that it’s delicious. And the next time you guys cook something, we’re doing it together, got it? You guys are going to learn how to cook something decent if it fucking kills me.”
“Noooo, was it really that bad?” Deku whines out, embarrassed. “We tried our best, I swear.”
“You can only improve, sweetheart,” Todoroki assures him gently as he feeds him one of the cookies, and Katsuki snorts.
“Sure as hell can’t get much worse,” Katsuki teases, and Deku whines mournfully around another mouthful of cookie.
He eyes the last of the presents and finds himself falling serious. He hands a velvet box to each of them as he says, “It’s not much. But they’re for all of us to wear, if you guys want. I know getting matching shit is old-fashioned or whatever, but I just liked the idea of it. Of all three of us wearing it- together. And it’ll be easy to add shit to them in the future or whatever.” He doesn’t add that he’s thinking about how good a ring will look resting on each of their necklaces because even he realizes it’s a little fast for that stage.
He still thinks it, though.
The two of them are quiet as they pull their necklaces from the boxes. And Katsuki wasn’t being humble when he said they aren’t much- they’re really just simple silver chains. Nothing gaudy or ostentatious and easy to hide under t-shirts and hero costumes.
But the two of them are looking at them with shining eyes like Katsuki just gave them fucking diamonds or something. It’s… nice. It’s really fucking nice.
“K-Kacchan, this is just- wow.”
“Can we wear them?” Todoroki asks, and Katsuki huffs out a laugh.
“Course,” he rumbles out, voice thick with emotion and feelings and all that shit.
Todoroki beams, wide and genuine and damn, undoing the clasp on the chain before hesitating and looking back up at Katsuki. “Will you put it on me?”
“Ah!” Deku gasps, excited. “Me too!”
Katsuki blinks, cheeks flushing, before he nods mutely. He crawls onto the bed until he’s kneeling in front of them. They’re close, and it's impossible to not breathe in their sweet scent, and Katsuki is starting to feel a bit dizzy with it.
He takes the chain from Todoroki’s hands as he ducks his head, and his hands only shake a little as he clasps it around his neck. He settles the chain neatly against the soft skin, and he feels Todoroki shiver as he brushes against the sensitive skin there.
He’s pulling away, getting ready to turn toward Deku, when Todoroki surges up. He wraps a hand around his neck, pulling Katsuki down so that he can tuck his head against his neck.
Katsuki gasps loudly as Todoroki brushes his cheek against his scent gland, and holy shit, is it powerful. It’s like a pulse of pure pleasure as tingles race down his spine, and the wake of it leaves Katsuki shaking. Deku laughs delightedly as Katsuki falls back on his ass, stunned, and Todoroki smiles down at him, smug and happy.
Then he leans forward and places his lips gently against Katsuki’s forehead. Katsuki does not whine because he has his pride, damnit, but it’s a near thing. He feels Todoroki’s lips curve into a smile as he moves back, and before Katsuki can move or blink or even think to reciprocate, Todoroki shoves him toward Deku.
Katsuki grunts as he tips over, but Deku gracefully catches him in his arms and hauls Katsuki into his lap.
“Hey, Kacchan,” Deku whispers down to him, bringing a hand up to lay against his cheek. And it’s not fair, okay, because Katsuki has never done this before, and the two of them have experience, and they’re definitely using it to their advantage against him. Deku, the little nerd he’s known since they were in fucking diapers, has no right to look so- so suave while Katsuki blushes like a goddamn maiden in his lap. “Me too?”
And how could Katsuki say no to that? So he nods against his hand, pushing himself up on still shaking arms until he reaches Deku. Once he’s there, he hesitates because he still doesn’t know the exact social cues he should be following here, and he would rather die than fuck this up right now. It sucks, but Deku just smiles and shifts so that he can press his cheek in the same spot Todoroki did.
It’s just as intense and spine-tingling as the first time, but Katsuki is at least prepared for it this time around. He braces his arms around Deku’s shoulder and sags against him when his knees go weak. Deku catches him again easily, cooing sweet nothings into his neck as Katsuki tries to get his brain to work again.
But then Todoroki presses himself against his back, purrs rumbling through his chest and into Katsuki’s, laying a kiss first on Deku’s cheek and then on the soft spot right under Katsuki’s ear.
And Katsuki has nothing but delicious vanilla and cinnamon flavored contentment coursing through his veins, making him feel almost drunk. He barely even notices his own rough, rumbly purrs coming from a place right behind his heart.
He does notice the heart-racing-skin-buzzy-sweaty-palm-ness, but for once, he can’t say that he really minds the feeling.