Chapter Text
The cruiser back to Coruscant is ghostly.
While missions are always difficult, this one in particular has been exceedingly brutal. It’s not uncommon to witness death. After all, they were created for such a task. However, the explosion that claimed the ARC Trooper’s life has definitely left more than physical debris scattered in its wake.
Which is why Cody is determined to find Rex. There are a few places the captain likes to retreat to that consist of light foot traffic—or in other words, places he can hide.
That makes it easy to bypass the mess and bunks where most of his brothers gather.
Seeking out a lesser-known room off the beaten path, the door gives a soft beep before allowing him to enter.
The viewport to his left casts a ghostly glow about the small space. Housing a few chairs, sofas, and tables, it’s a stark contrast to the orderly barracks with posters plastered on the walls.
And certainly a place Rex would seek out.
Lingering in the doorway, Cody spots him seated in a chair watching over—guarding—ARC Trooper Fives who’s fast asleep on a sofa near him. Taking a moment, Cody wonders if it’s appropriate to intrude. Is it his place to enter? To say anything?
After all, while he knew Echo—watched him grow from rookie to ARC Trooper—he wasn’t as close to him as Fives. However, he does understand loss. Like they all do. He’s lost his batchmates, lost his squads. If he were to lose Rex—
That’s a thought Cody’d rather not have.
At least the kid has Rex to turn too, Cody thinks, pushing the other concern from his mind.
If there’s any of their brothers that has a good ear, there’s no one better than the captain. Rex is a smart man, a kind friend, a loyal brother. At times, Cody wishes he were more like him. He seems more capable of empathy than most. In fact, Cody finds himself going to Rex at times.
He’s also seemingly made of beskar unless you’ve known him as long as Cody has. Looking at him now, he sees the cracks in his outer shell.
Pain.
Sorrow.
Suffering.
Losing Echo is a heavy loss to Rex.
A subtle jolt of the captain’s shoulders makes up Cody’s mind. Quietly, he approaches. Finds himself halting near the chair.
Hesitating.
Looking down at his brother, Rex’s nose flares. A tear streaks down his cheek. He swallows roughly and decidedly fixes his gaze on his holonovel.
Settling on the coffee table in front of him, Cody doesn’t say a word. Simply watches another subtle jolt of Rex’s shoulders as the beskar exterior cracks.
Clearing his throat, the captain whispers, “He’s not taking it too well.”
Rex’s distant gaze is something rare and in some ways concerning. He might be having a conversation, but he’s not really in this room nor this moment. He’s somewhere else, another galaxy perhaps.
To be expected.
“If either of you were, I’d be concerned,” Cody whispers in reply.
Rex swallows roughly again and is quick to brush a tear from his cheek.
The burn in Cody’s eyes shouldn’t be unexpected, but he’s still surprised. He can’t keep his mind from tumbling down the path of if he had lost Rex. If the captain had died in that explosion. If Rex had perished on Lola Sayu. If he had to come back from the Citadel without him. Cody’d be in worse shape if he lost his friend—his little brother.
He’d be inconsolable.
A shaky breath from Rex draws his attention. Teeth chattering lightly, the beskar continue to shatter.
“You did well, Rex.”
There’s a slight nod in response as his brother stiffens.
“You did,” Cody reiterates. “You’re a good solider, a good captain—”
“Couldn’ save Echo,” he mumbles.
Cody reaches forward and puts a hand on Rex’s shoulder drawing his brother’s attention. As his gaze finally meets Cody’s, the beskar completely implodes. Chest shuddering in quiet sobs, Cody pulls him into an embrace.
“It’s okay,” Cody whispers. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not,” his little brother responds, voice shattering.
Cody doesn’t immediately respond because Rex is right. He knows it. It’s not okay. It will never be okay. No code will ever make it okay. The truth is this is the price of war. This is a cost they’re meant to pay for being given life.
“We don’t…even get to bury them.”
To that, Cody closes his eyes as Rex silently cries into his shoulder. So often in war there are no goodbyes. No burying the dead. No final farewells. At least, not when it comes to clones because in his mind Cody can still see the body drifting down the lava river and over the edge.
“The Jedi got to bury General Piell,” Rex whispers harshly as if he can read thoughts. Pulling away, he wipes tears from his face and looks at Cody with a narrowed gaze. “I understand our place, I know the clankers were after us, but they still buried theirs.”
Cody’s shoulders slump. He knows his brother well enough to know that Rex will never utter this to another, but it doesn’t make the statement any less. It’s also probably the closest Rex will ever come to treason.
“It’s not fair.”
“Life’s not fair, Rex. You know this,” Cody replies and in that moment he desperately wishes he spoke with more finesse—like Rex and Fives. His words seem harsh and cruel in such an unforgiving situation.
“But what did Echo ever do? Why did he deserve that?” The gaze Rex gives Cody shifts to nothing more than a little brother frantically seeking a logical answer from his older brother. “We planned, he helped create battle strategies, him and Fives were always making Torrent laugh. Why did he have to go?”
Cody takes a breath—a beat. “Echo did nothing to deserve it. You and I both know he was a great soldier and gave his life for the mission. Just like all our brothers. It doesn’t make it fair. It doesn’t make it okay. It doesn’t make it right. But, we can do the same for him as we do for others. We can fight for him, to remember him.”
To that, fresh tears slip down his brother’s cheeks.
Rising, Cody pats his shoulder. “Come here.”
Leading him to the viewport, they gaze out at the stars stretching silently around them.
“For now, though…we pay our respects. We might not have a body, but we can say our goodbyes without.”
Cody watches as his little brother quietly sobs so Fives’ isn’t woken. Placing an arm around Rex’s shoulders, he swallows roughly.
If he ever lost his little brother, he doesn’t know how he’d survive.
