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Max is a mess, though that's his usual state. He's a Goof and a teenager. It can't be helped. However, he was more of a mess than usual because tomorrow he and Yakko were going on their first real date. They had hung out as friends for months before, and after they confessed they had gone on a few double dates or group dates with friends and classmates. However, even months later, they had yet to go on a date that was just the two of them.
They had both agreed that the typical date things — movies, dinner, movies and dinner — were not going to be interesting for either of them, but when asked for ideas Yakko had only smiled and said, “Surprise me.” So he planned, bouncing ideas off of anyone who would listen and anyone who wouldn’t. More than anything he wanted to succeed. He needed to succeed.
PJ, Bobby, and Roxanne were not sympathetic to his woes. Apparently they had watched him pine for months while coming up with things Yakko had not done before, and watching him panic now made up for all of the schemes he had dragged them into. They did not leave him high and dry as he tried to plan, but they also got more amusement out of watching him suffer in these final moments.
He was so nervous about this date that he felt nauseated. It was not like his usual ideas. He would admit that he had been attempting to impress Yakko back when they had first become friends, but that was different. Back then, he had wanted Yakko to see how cool he could be. Now he wanted to make sure that Yakko didn’t get bored of him, and that was so much more important.
His friends understood, or so they claimed. “You’ll be fine,” said Bobby, who was far too relaxed about hearing Max’s plan for the hundredth time. “You’ve come this far with him, and he survived the Fondue Idea. You’re not gonna scare him off after that.”
Shuddering in sympathy over the Fondue Incident PJ and Roxanne nodded in agreement.
“I thought the lactose allergy was a gag,” said Max. “He eats pizza all the time with us.”
“He used to eat pizza all the time with us,” corrected Roxanne. “Dot and Wakko ganged up on him after the Fondue Thing.”
“Making him try fondue was not my greatest hour,” admitted Max. “And that’s why I need your help with this. What if it goes wrong?”
PJ gave him a thousand-yard stare. Because of the proximity of their houses he had been the one to bear the brunt of most of Max’s panicked plotting, especially late at night. He had seen and heard too much. “Then it goes wrong.”
“But —”
Max’s phone buzzed and fell off the cafeteria table. Jokes on it, Max had it in the toughest case he could buy. It continued to vibrate away on the floor, and Max was going to dismiss the call until he saw Yakko's face and number lighting up the screen.
He was not actually supposed to be talking on the phone at school, even with its lax rules — the school he went to catered mostly to toons, focusing on social skills and experiences over strict academic performance — so he crawled under the table to answer. PJ and Bobby scooted their chairs closer to hide him, and Roxanne kept an eye out for staff. They could be good friends. Sometimes.
“Hey,” he said, answering the phone. “How’s the shoot going?”
The Warner Brothers and Sister were excused from school for the day for filming, and as long as someone signed off for their three hours of study it would not count as an absence. Wakko and Dot did not care if they received an absence, but Yakko did; he liked learning and he liked it being acknowledged too. He might try to behave for the studio teacher, though it was a coinflip whether or not he would succeed. Making mischief and being smart were just parts of who he was.
Just like his laugh was a part of him, though now it sounded strange. It was high and airy like the time of the Fondue Idea. Max could imagine the expression on his face, a quivering little smile hiding a secret, as he spoke. “It’s going swimmingly, but. Uh, well. You see. Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh, I need to take a rain check on our date.”
Max’s heart dropped all the way to his knees before leaping up to behind his eyes and pounding like a jackhammer. “If — if you need to. When do you think you’re free?” It had been hard to work around his filming schedule, and Max tried hard to clamp down on his growing panic as his world started falling apart. He should have known it wouldn't be so simple.
“Oh, I’m free as a bird — ha! A bird! — but I’m caught up in something... complicated,” said Yakko with that same tone of voice that made his heart pound but his hands clench in fear. Then, softer, like a secret, “I’m sorry. I really wanted to go, please believe me, I didn’t mean for this to happen I don’t even know what went wrong and —”
Yakko’s ramblings edged into panicking before careening off the cliff into incoherency. That made Max stop spiraling into terrible daydreams. Something had to be wrong if Yakko were like this. “I believe you,” he cut in, putting as much honesty into each word as he could.
Seeming to believe him, Yakko fell silent. Then before Max could get in another word, he said, “I— I have to go.”
And then he hung up.
Max did not know how long he sat under the table when Bobby's face came into view. There was a tinge of worry on his face but otherwise he looked calm.
“Good news, he still wants to date you,” he said cheerfully, and no one could blame Max for punching him in the shin, even if he did put a shaky smile back on Max's face.
~~~~~
Max was useless in class after lunch, but he managed to drift through the rest of the day on autopilot, checking into reality only to look at his phone for anything from Yakko. Every time he checked and nothing new appeared from Yakko, the blinding panic only grew worse. He only survived to the last bell with the help of his friends. They raised their hands to answer questions so that the teacher wouldn't call on a random student, and they fed him answers when necessary. PJ had even helped him walk to the next class when he had trouble standing. He really did not want to imagine how awful it would have been without them.
His thoughts were miles away with Yakko, wherever he was. He was supposed to be on the studio lot filming today, and after that phone call Max had planned to go there after school whether Ralph decided he was welcome or not. However, Wakko had texted him a little after lunch, sending a new address and saying that he or Dot would meet him outside. For some reason, they were telling him to go to the aquarium. He had tried to ask more questions after that, but there had been no replies from any of the Warners.
Without a better idea in mind, Max texted his dad where he was going and got on the metro to the aquarium by himself. The aquarium was in Long Beach, which was far from the school and all their homes, and only he was able to go on such short notice — though he would have gone anyway whether or not Dad gave him permission to go.
As Max walked up to the aquarium, he heard Wakko call out to him. He waited off to the side with a bald, very wrinkled man. Max couldn't remember his actual name, only 'Scratchy' as the Warners had told him, and Max hoped he would never have to actually say his name.
“You have to see what happened,” said Wakko, bouncing excitedly and tugging him inside past the ticket area. No one stopped them, and the aquarium seemed oddly quiet for a Friday afternoon. In fact, only he, Wakko, and Scratchy seemed to be the only guests. A few staff members and volunteers hurried around the aquarium, carrying buckets of water and using their radios. One person walked by with an armful of bright orange crabs and looked about to cry.
Whenever Max tried to ask what was going on, Wakko shushed Scratchy while giggling and pulled Max deeper into the aquarium. This continued for long enough that Max wanted to yell, but thankfully before he lost his temper Wakko stopped walking, pointed into the nearby tank, and yelled, “Say hello!”
Max looked into the tank before he could stop himself. It was the shark tunnel tank, but there was only clear blue water shining through now. It took a moment for him to see that all the sharks were swimming as far as they could on the left side, opposite of where Wakko was waving at a shining fishtail. It gleamed a bright topaz color whenever it twitched. Max looked more closely at this new creature, and immediately felt his brain turn blue in shock.
Then Yakko swam towards him and rested his hands on the tank plexiglass, smiling wide and speaking soundlessly, as his new mermaid's tail waved behind him.
~~~~~
“The look on your face was priceless,” said Dot, several minutes later when his brain was working properly again. She was on her phone applying filters to the picture she took of him and Yakko. “I’m going to set it as Yakko’s wallpaper when he gets a new phone.”
“You better have got my good side,” said Yakko. He had been moved back to the animal care center while Max had spaced out in shock. He had been in the aquarium’s shark lagoon to surprise him and for the extra swimming space, but it was easier to speak if he was in the care center’s pools. He was hanging half out of the pool, arms hanging over the edge of a rehabilitation holding tank, while his mermaid tail waved lazily under water. Occasionally he flicked water at someone, usually his siblings.
“None of which are as good as mine.”
Yakko gasped dramatically and turned to Max. “Won’t you defend my honor against this slight?”
Max splashed him. “I know a losing battle when I see it.”
“You would go down with dignity, though.”
“But if I do, how can I take you on a date?” he said before he could stop himself. It was still too early to tease about that.
Yakko took it in stride, wincing only a little. “I don’t think anyone has done a remake of Casper yet. We could re-enact the dance scene.”
Filing away that idea (the dancing idea, not the dying then becoming a ghost only to come back idea) for later. “I’d rather be alive for the date, if you don’t mind. How long are you like this?”
“Right now I can’t get changed back for at least a week. The redesign work is set in so deep that they have to get a restorer in to fix it, and she can’t get her studio set up for that until Tuesday at the earliest.” Yakko pushed off the wall to float on his back, using only his tail to propel him. Sunlight glowed off the scales, dazzling Max. It hurt to look at and hurt more to look away. “If you’d told me it was possible to mess me up this much, I’d never have agreed to this skit.”
That was a lie. The Warners had a little more control over their skits and could turn them down now, but Yakko had been excited to do this one. Before filming he had been bouncing off the walls in anticipation. Max was certain Yakko would still agree to film this mermaid parody even knowing the consequences would be this extreme.
How it got this extreme, with Yakko stuck in his mermaid design, was a bit of a mystery. The Warners were, at their core, older toons; sometimes animators had to use special techniques to change their appearances, unlike with Bobby and Roxanne. However, Wakko and Dot had apparently changed back to their usual design without any issues. Only Yakko had taken to the redesign like a fish to water.
Of the three siblings, Yakko was the least adept when it came to physicality. Dot, despite being so much smaller, was equally as strong, and Wakko was the best of them at physical gags. It made sense to Max that Wakko would have no troubles with knowing what shape his body ought to be, and he supposed Dot had been too stubborn for the change to be permanent.
But just because it made sense to him that Yakko would be the one to lose his sense of self did not mean he was less sympathetic.
Yakko was trying to be cheerful about it, and he genuinely seemed to enjoy swimming like this. However, whenever he was still, his ears pulled tight against his head as if someone were yelling at him and his tail would curl up little by little until it meant he could no longer float. Sometimes, he scratched at his scales, but Max couldn't tell if it was from his fraying nerves or the chlorine-induced screaming rash — literally screaming, there was a long string of red hives shaped like A's — on his tail. Had he not been forced to leave the studio lot to receive treatment at the aquarium he might have been more comfortable with losing his usual shape. He lived there, after all, and was not sounded by strangers.
If it would have helped Yakko, Max would have climbed in the pool with him. However, the aquarium staff stopped him before he could get in. They said something about training and liability, and since Dad wasn't there to sign off on anything he hadn't been able to argue more with them. Instead they gave him some of the toys they used for the other animals. Max felt a little insulted and infantilized, but Yakko immediately took one of the frisbees and threw it to his brother.
It was more fun that Max expected to toss around a frisbee, though he had never done it with a boyfriend or a mermaid, and his life was weird enough that both happened at the same time. Watching Yakko dive under before launching himself several feet in the air to catch the frisbee never got old, no matter how many times he did it. Eventually they stopped to watch Yakko perform more tricks. He performed flips and spins, glided backwards on the surface, and dove without a splash. He finally seemed to feel more comfortable and relaxed.
However, it wasn’t meant to last. Hours passed like minutes, and before he knew it, the sun had set. An aquarium staff member came up to them and said, “Visiting hours are hours, kids. You’ll be able to visit tomorrow morning.”
Max hated this human so much, he realized, as he watched the color drain out of Yakko’s face and his smile disappear. Wakko and Dot, realizing that he was trying to separate them, turned red with fury. Then Yakko glared the man, opened his mouth, and —
— the world vanished before Max’s eyes as a wave seemed to swallow him whole.
~~~~~
Max gasped for air before he realized he was standing on solid ground. His clothes were soaked, though, and for some reason he was in a different part of the aquarium, far away from the tank Yakko was in. Dot held his hand tightly, white-knuckled under her gloves, but her expression was surprisingly calm.
“My brother really is head over heels for you,” she said with wonder in her voice.
“Well, maybe not now. He doesn’t have any at the moment.”
She glared at him but let the joke slide. “You seem to be fine now. Come on, let’s get a change of clothes from someone.” She too was soaked, like she had jumped in one of the pools.
When he asked what happened, she passed him Wakko’s phone and dragged him along as he watched the latest video.
Yakko sang, his voice high and haunting as it reverberated across the aquarium. The other animals, which had until that moment been hiding from Yakko, breached the water’s surface and joined in with him. But the sound of the seals, sea lions, and other animals only strengthened whatever spell was spinning into existence. As the camera shifted, fish stopped swimming to bubble wordlessly in sync, and the sharks which had previously filled the side of their lagoon farthest away, began dancing closer and closer to the walls of their tanks. Crabs and octopi escaped their enclosures to crawl their way down the hallways.
Then the camera shifted again to show Max throwing himself into Yakko’s tank.
The movie stopped shortly after that. Everything dropped out of frame as the singing abruptly turned to Yakko screaming, Dot swearing, and another splash.
“You’re kind of heavy, especially in that hoodie and those pants,” said Dot matter-of-factly as if she hadn’t jumped in to save him. “Have you ever considered a different look?”
“These are pretty comfortable when they aren’t soaking wet.”
“Well, that’s not my fault, Mister. Wear shorts next time.”
Max did not want to blame Yakko, though. “Why did — that happen?”
“I’m not supposed to tell you this — filming secrets, NDAs, Norita’s lawyers — but for the skit we had some songs, and Yakko seems to be a siren now.” Dot looked at him when he did not react as she expected. “You know what a siren is, right?”
“Yes.” She glared at him. “No.”
“Boys,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Sirens sing to lure sailors to them.”
“But it didn’t work on you and Wakko.”
“You’re his boyfriend, dummy.” She shook her head hopelessly. “You two blockheads are made for each other.”
Max felt a little insulted, but his heart was doing flips in his chest and joy warmed him. His expression might have been a little lovesick because Dot gagged. He floated giddily the rest of the way to the staff area where Dot stole some volunteer polos for them to change into. She dashed off to the bathroom but he stayed in the staff locker room. His backpack had remained dry, so he had his shorts from P.E. class to wear. Outside the bathroom Dot waited for him; the shirt was basically a dress on her. As they returned to animal care center, no one stopped them, and now Max realized that when he had first arrived the aquarium staff had been dealing with the aftermath of Yakko’s singing.
They returned, but the Warner Brothers were nowhere to be seen. Before Max could worry Wakko broke through the water’s surface, took a huge gulp of air, waved at them, and dove back down. Max leaned over the edge of the pool to see his hands rapidly signing at Yakko, who was curled up so tight he looked like a boiled shrimp. The only movement Max could make out was him shaking his head.
When Wakko came up for air again, Max called him over. “Can you tell him I’m not mad? I’m sorry for scaring him.”
“Okey-dokey, Maxaroni,” said Wakko, saluting him and then diving back under. A few seconds passed before Yakko unfurled and swam up to him.
“Why are you sorry?” he asked immediately.
“Because I scared you.”
“But I —”
“— didn’t know that would happen.” Without thinking about it, Max reached out to touch Yakko’s face, who instinctively turned to nuzzle his hand. “If you think it wasn’t my fault, then it wasn’t your fault, either.”
“Your logic is flawed.”
“Says you. My logic is perfect.”
“Please don’t kiss,” said Dot, causing Yakko and Max to start.
“At least not in front of my salad,” said Wakko, who was treading water nearby with a salad in hand.
“Is this how I make you eat vegetables?” asked Yakko. “For a meme?”
“If it works, it works,” said Wakko, shrugging and eating at the same time. Yakko sighed.
Three human men approached them. One was Scratchy, who looked exhausted. The shortest of them wore a grey suit instead of the staff polo shirt, but his pin said he was the aquarium executive director. The tallest man looked like his staff polo shirt was one pecs flex away from being shredded. If he stayed around the toons for too long, it would be.
“If I might interrupt,” said Mr. Devon, after introductions, “Dr. Scratchansniff, Ms. Norita, and I have reached an agreement. Wakko and Dot may stay overnight with their brother while he is here as they are family, but I’m afraid I need you to go home, young man.”
“I vill drive you home, Max,” said Scratchy. He next turned to the Warners. “Kidses, please behave when I’m gone.”
“We promise nothing,” said Yakko. Scratchy sighed but did not look surprised. He just looked like the exhausted parent the Warners had made him into.
“Vell, I tried and nothing is on fire.”
“Yet.”
“Please vait until I get back to the aquarium at least.”
Max said goodbye to the Warners — and did not kiss Yakko goodbye because they had an audience. It was only when the glow of spending time with Yakko — public as it was — wore off that he remembered that their date plans were officially ruined. And they didn’t even talk about what to do next. He groaned, and slammed his face down into his dinner. Takeout Chinese splattered to the floor.
“He’ll be fine, Maxie,” said Dad. He had been worried that Max was so late, but Scratchy explained the situation to him before returning to the aquarium. “Restorations are pretty common. Mickey has them done all the time, and this isn’t Yakko’s first time either.”
“It’s not that,” he said, speaking into his plate. It was hard trying to talk when food kept slipping into his mouth, so he turned his head. “Tomorrow was supposed to be our first date.”
“It’ll be one that you remember forever,” said Dad. “It doesn’t get more memorable than going on a date with a mermaid.”
“You’ve never dated a mermaid.” There was no way that his dad, Goofy G. Goof, had ever dated a mermaid.
“Well, son, you see —”
“Nope!” Max rocketed to his feet and covered his ears, bolting for his bedroom as if he could outrun the mental images of his dad kissing — “Nope, nope, nope! I don’t want to know who you dated!”
“But it’s a great story!”
Dad thankfully did not try to pursue the issue further, and even brought up his dinner so he could finish it in his room. He checked his messages — Dot and Wakko had already messaged PJ, Bobby, and Roxanne about what happened — and made plans. Their friends wanted to visit Yakko at the aquarium, as did he. And with his date effectively cancelled, this would be the next best thing.
Nothing ever went right for a Goof, and Yakko did not have much better luck, though he didn’t like to acknowledge it. Honestly, he should have expected that their date would not go as planned. He might be able to salvage it after Yakko’s restoration, but this would always be a dark cloud hanging over it. They would always remember that it got delayed because of an animation goof.
Animation goofs were not uncommon in their line of work, but Max had never had such an issue. His redesigns had been minor changes that were easily reversed, but he had vague memories of his dad needing a restoration after working once. He had become stuck as the Ghost of Marley, so Max had stayed with Minnie and Mickey for that weekend. He had been embarrassingly inconsolable until Mickey had taken one of the wands from the studio and distracted him with magic. A picture of him laughing while ghostly flowers rained from the wand was one of Dad’s favorites.
A plan struck him upside the head — not literally, he could not summon lightbulb ideas like Yakko — but he felt the same jolt and energy he always got whenever he had an idea. If he could do it right, he could rescue their date. And his “Goof luck” had already ruined his date. Like lightning, it was unlikely to get him twice for the same thing.
He hoped.
After his dad went to sleep, Max crawled out his bedroom window like he was ten years old again and headed to PJ’s house. It was late enough that most of their neighbors would be asleep but he was still cautious. Pete was as acerbic in real life as on the silver screen. Upon arriving, he threw rocks at PJ’s windows until PJ opened it.
“This is the sort of thing you do with your boyfriend,” he said, but he was still lowering a rope ladder for Max. It was old and rickety and Max worried it would snap. He had been smaller when he last used it.
“My boyfriend doesn’t have legs at the moment, and he lives in a tower twice as tall as your house.”
“Then be like Flynn Rider. Tangled was a great movie, and you know it. Now what’s so important you came over at — oh geez, it’s one in the morning.”
Max sat down on PJ’s still-warm computer chair as PJ sat on his bed. “You weren’t sleeping,” he said, before launching into his plan.
PJ waited patiently for Max to finish before saying, “This is the dumbest plan you have ever had.”
“Even the —”
“Dumbest. Plan. Ever.” PJ leaned back on his bed dramatically. “You should do it.”
“Really?”
“You’ve been losing your mind for weeks over this date and it sucks that this happened. If you think this can fix things, you should do it.”
Max grinned. PJ could be a really good friend when he needed to be. “Will you help me do it?”
“I’m going to have to, aren’t I?”
“Isn’t that how this always goes?”
PJ covered his face and groaned. “Just as long as my dad doesn’t find out, I’m in. Now get out of my house. I need to sleep before we commit grand larceny.”
~~~~~
“I’m starting to think we shouldn’t be doing this,” said PJ. Early next morning, Max texted Bobby and Roxanne his new plan — the part he needed them to help with — and both agreed to help him. After criticizing his plan.
Max’s only defense was that he had only come up with it the night before. Bobby thought it was a reasonable defense, but PJ and Roxanne did not.
Bobby was his best friend now.
Arriving at the Disney filming lot, they all managed to simply walk in; they were Disney toons, after all. Max wished that part had been more difficult, though, because now there were still more ways for his “Goof luck” to sabotage him.
Like trying to find the right Costume and Props department. The first one was a bust, filled with props and costumes for the human actors, but Max had expected the first one to be a failure. It never went that smoothly. However, the next two were also not the ones he needed. Human clothes filled the second one, and the third one was just embarrassing.
“I can’t believe you used to be this small,” had said PJ, holding up one of Max’s old costumes: a pale yellow shirt and blue overalls. Max could not remember it at all, but it had been in a box labelled “Goof, Jr.” so he supposed it had to be one of his old outfits.
“I can’t believe you used to be this small,” Max had retorted, pulling out PJ’s old Goof Troop jacket.
“Hey, it’s my jacket! I loved that one.”
They had argued for a bit, but Max was completely outnumbered by them on whether or not that style of jacket was still in fashion. Afterwards, PJ had taken the jacket, though it was too small for him.
Now they were outside another costume storage building and Max was starting to worry. They were running out of time if they were going to the aquarium when they told Yakko they would arrive — via Dot, because apparently Norita refused to get him another smartphone until he could be trusted not to drop it in water again. On top of that, they had been on the lot for a long time. It was only a matter of time before someone started to get suspicious of them. He could only hope his luck would hold out just long enough.
They entered the building and quickly locked the door behind them. For some reason, this one had been unlocked — the door sprung open under his touch as if powered by a spring. They had to use their smartphones to see as the lights refused to turn on. A film of dust cloaked everything in soft grey, and none of them dared to speak or breathe louder than a whisper. Something about this building muffled everything but their fear, rattling against the cage that was their bones.
Wordlessly, they split up to search the building. It was a single room filled floor-to-ceiling and wall-to-wall with metal shelves. There was no beauty to the iron shelves and no organization either. At best the archival boxes were carefully labelled with yellowing cursive, but a box labeled Hats was filled with scarves, and stored next to a box labeled Books - scripts, whose lid was somehow stuck. The thought of checking each box filled Max with dread, but he was certain that what he was looking for was there.
He was the one to find it, in the end. In the light that shone through the room’s only window, there was an eight-sided curio cabinet. Carved owls peered out from the dusty walnut, their eyes hidden among the delicate acanthus leaves and poppies that caged whatever was inside. Max could not find the cabinet door until his fingers caught on the slight lip of its edge. It opened easily and Max felt he understood why.
Every sort of magic wand imaginable filled the cabinet, each one resting vertically in place, suspended in air by its own power in defiance of gravity. Wooden wands — robust and firm — thrummed like a bass guitar holding a note for far too long. Jewel-tipped wands pulsated with light in time with his heart, beating more rapidly with each passing second. Wands of a bone-white material whispered to him secrets he could not understand, while a slim wand like a conductor’s band told him secrets he wanted to forget. Delicate as a bird’s wings, the glass wands sang sweetly to him, promising wishes that were not his own.
For a moment Max hesitated. This plan was so much better until he had lain eyes on the wands that Disney Studios had collected, used, and eventually stored away once special effects technology had improved. He had thought the wands had been stored for safe-keeping, but now he was not sure what was being kept safe: the wands or everything else.
But then he spied the one that Mickey had used to entertain him as a child. It was a plain magician’s wand made of mahogany and capped with silver on both ends. To Max it was quieter than the others — until he touched it.
As if the wand itself had been a faucet, magic poured into Max, starting from the hand that grabbed the wand, then sinking all the way to his toes and rising to the top of his skull. It coursed through him like water bursting through a dam, sweeping through and washing away thought and doubt. He felt like he could do anything he wanted as long as he had the wand in hand.
Then Bobby clapped him on the shoulder, and that feeling popped like a bubble, delicate and beautiful, and Max suddenly felt small and hollow.
“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, peering over his glasses with worry. PJ and Roxanne were nearby but had not seen.
Max nodded shakily and uncertainly. “I found the wand,” he said in lieu of explanation. He took off his socks, jammed the wand in one and then the other, and tucked it into his pants pocket. “C’mon, let’s get out of here.”
They rushed out of the studio lot, spurred on by fear — of being caught and that storage room. They had been unable to lock it from the outside, but they reasoned it had been unlocked when they arrived. Regardless, they wanted to put as much distance as they could between them and it, and so they ran farther and faster than necessary, running all the way to the metro stop after the one they needed to get to the aquarium.
Wakko told them not to get lunch because the studio was catering it, though whether that was true or if the Warners just had access to someone’s credit card was up for debate. Again he was waiting for them and led them to the animal care center, which was currently closed off to the public to give Yakko privacy. Norita had also made a deal with the aquarium with a non-disclosure clause about his condition, according to Yakko, though he did not know who got anything from it aside from Yakko.
Once they reached the poolside for lunch, Max was certain one of the Warners had just taken someone’s credit card because there were enormous platters of sushi waiting for them. It was enough to feed an army, or them and Wakko. Max thought sushi was a little too ironic for what was going on. If he had been turned into a mermaid, he would have resisted any strange urges. However, Yakko liked to indulge himself whenever he could, and this time was no different. His fishy brain wanted fish, so he got fish, according to him. He took turns tossing sashimi to himself and his brother with PJ and Bobby joining in as well.
After lunch one of the care center staff asked them to leave so they could examine Yakko. His rash was better now, but they wanted to be sure. Only Dot and Wakko had been permitted to stay, though the glare in Yakko’s eyes told him that if Max hadn’t been there he would have started to sing. Because Max had asked for it, Dot sent him a video of her brother singing before they left to explore the aquarium.
Once they found a quiet part of the aquarium, up near the jellyfish exhibit, they watched the video. Max thought it would be the one of him ending up in the pool and braced himself for questions. However, it was one he had not watched yet. In the video, Yakko was nowhere to be seen. Only his voice, as strong as a storm, could be heard as it whipped up the sea creatures into a supernatural frenzy.
“Mermaids are officially cool again,” declared PJ. “Who knew he could do that?” He scrolled back in the video to where the sharks and stingrays whipped about the tank as Yakko’s voice crescendoed.
“If anyone would get strange powers from an animation mishap, it would be one of the Warners,” said Roxanne. “It has to be a little scary for him, though.”
“He’ll bounce back,” Bobby said, as if unconcerned. “This video does explain why the animals are acting kinda weird.”
“Are they?” Roxanne asked, as she and PJ turned to the nearest tank, where the jellyfish danced in thrall. Max paused the video, and the jellyfish stopped their dance and floated lazily. Max played the video again, and they watched as the jellyfish twirled hypnotically to Yakko’s song. As the video looped their dance became more frantic until they beat their tentacles against the glass as if trying to break free.
Bobby was right, Max realized, as they went from exhibit to exhibit playing the video. The song seemed weaker in a recorded state, but the sea creatures danced before them like marionettes before swimming into the glass or leaping through the surface out-of-sight. They only stopped the experiment when an octopus actually did break loose, causing patrons to run screaming. After that, the aquarium decided to close early, but before he was kicked out Dot found him and dragged him back to Yakko. Max would have gone willingly to see him, but the aquarium staff had tried to stop her at first. He was a menace to the aquarium, but she could be a menace to everyone.
Yakko swam over to him when he arrived, almost launching himself out of the water in his rush. Max knelt by the poolside and helped him up so they could sit side-by-side on the edge. “I missed you,” he claimed, wrapping his arms around Max, awkwardly from the side. He was a little cold and very damp, but Max did not mind. “I miss doing things, too, but I really miss you. I’m not even allowed my phone — my new phone — back until I’m back to normal because I dropped it in the studio pool and wrecked it, so Wakko and Dot have to text you for me and that’s no good. They won’t even if I ask.”
Max thought of some of the messages they had sent each other — as sappy as a sugar maple tree — and was very glad Yakko had resisted the urge. Max hadn’t. More messages than he would ever admit were waiting unread for Yakko.
He did not know what to say after that. “I miss you too” felt inadequate and wrong; Yakko was there beside him now, a patch of wetness and loveliness that filled a void in Max that had been left behind by the magic. The magic had filled him taut like a sail and left him just as empty without it. But now Yakko was like a soft ocean breeze, bringing him back and letting him unfurl slowly back into some semblance of himself. He had no words for this feeling, so he simply buried his head in Yakko’s fur and let himself be.
He smelled right and wrong at the same time. Far beneath was Yakko, a million little things coalesced into this silly boy he liked so much, but on top of that like perfume was sea-salt and open water. The smell of dense ocean fog filled his lungs and for a moment he believed in wishes made in fountains and that seashells might contain the whole ocean. Maybe this was what the sea creatures felt, being in Yakko’s presence. What he had mistaken for fear was reverence for something greater than possible.
Reality had messed with Yakko, so he returned the favor by being something only told in fairytales.
Max did not know how long they stayed like that. He could not remember if he had said anything more, nor if Yakko had spoken either. So often Yakko would speak to fill the silence, but he was learning little by little to listen to the world rather than fill it with all he had to give. Max let the sounds of the city and the ocean mix and crash into a quiet cacophony.
He would give anything to hear Yakko sing again.
An aquarium staff member approached them eventually. It was the same one — Pecs O’Flex, he of impossibly huge muscles — from yesterday, and his polo shirt still looked close to bursting. He said it was time for Max to leave as he was moving Yakko to a larger tank before nightfall. The rehabilitation tanks were too small for a mermaid. He lifted Yakko like he was no more than a handful of stones.
“Can I carry him?” Max asked, suddenly realizing he had only one opportunity left for his plan. “Please?”
Pecs looked at him strangely — a mix of tiredness, pity, and intrigue. “I shouldn’t,” he said. He looked around, stared at a security camera, and made a decision. “Are you sure? He bites.” There was a bandage on his arm that Max recognized as Yakko panicking and accidentally biting him, rather than deliberately biting him.
Max could take a few bites; he was a Goof and basically made of toon iron. He nodded, and Pecs dropped Yakko in his arms. Immediately Yakko melted into him and pressed flush against him. He was so cold. He followed Pecs down a Staff Only hallway to the upper part of the largest tank. When his keys rattled in the lock, Max whispered to Yakko, “Tonight at midnight. Meet me by the water’s edge.”
Yakko opened his mouth to speak and impulsively Max kissed him. It was too sweet and too short, and afterwards Yakko gaped at him like a goldfish. He was still in shock when Max placed him in water, soaking himself rather than letting go. Only the thought of his plan gave Max the strength to walk away from Yakko now.
When the reality of what he had done set in, he turned as red as his hoodie. He pulled up the hoodie to hide his face, put on his headphones, and listened to the video of Yakko’s song all the way home.
~~~~~
Dad had gone on a fishing trip that day. He had promised — pinky-promised! — Max that he would not do anything that would mess up his date, if it had gone as originally planned. So when the date fell through, he had considered cancelling his plans. However, it had been so long since he had gone fishing with Mickey and Donald, and it was a shame to cancel it. Donald had even found a babysitter for the triplets.
As they had dinner — one of the fish he had caught — Dad talked about ocean-fishing out on Mickey’s boat near his home on Santa Catalina Island. What he had done with Donald and Mickey had gone in one ear and out the other, though. He could have said he had seen Nessie and serenaded her and Max would not know. He answered entirely by rote, too. He must have seemed depressed, though, because his dad had done the dishes for him, though that was supposed to be one of his chores, and let him take a whole sleeve of cookies to his bedroom. Maybe he was a little, but mostly he was nervous. He had no idea what would happen if he messed up.
Max laid down and waited until he could hear Dad snoring down the hallway. Once he was certain, he got up, changed into the aquarium volunteer polo shirt Dot had stolen for him, and pulled out the wand he had not touched since he took it.
It rested in his hand, powerless and dead. He worried he had broken it somehow. He waved it around as he remembered Mickey doing, but nothing happened. Not even a sprig of flowers or a burst of sparks appeared.
“I need you to work,” he told the wand, but it was unresponsive. The magic that had been in him once had abandoned him when he needed it most. He waved the wand around and tried to feel as though he were full of magic. Then he tried to feel as though he were completely empty, a bottle waiting to be filled and poured out at the wand’s whim, but on both occasions nothing happened. He felt no different than the fourteen-almost-fifteen-year-old boy he was. “Please work. I need to meet him tonight.”
The thought of Yakko waiting for him but never coming, disappointed and angry, seething like dark clouds before a storm, filled him with despair. He could not do that Yakko. He could not be the one to make him feel abandoned like that.
Then he felt magic well up inside him, starting from his feet and rising up in him and overflowing like a river bursting its banks. Words escaped him, seized him by his ribcage, and carried him to the aquarium faster than any bird could fly. He stumbled but managed to stay on his feet and on dry land. Nearby Dot and Wakko were in sleeping bags with their eyes closed. They seemed to be asleep and he hoped so.
It was before midnight but he did not have to wait long for Yakko to swim to the surface to meet him. Max lifted him out of the pool, and with a somewhat awkward motion, he waved the wand. The magic had not left him empty again. It filled him still, and as the wand moved he spoke words he did not know and felt him and Yakko lift away from the world and then drop down again. He landed more gracefully this time even with an armful of boyfriend. Above him a waxing moon shone and the stars glittered like city lights. Far away from Santa Catalina Island, Los Angeles continued on without them.
Yakko gasped and craned his neck back to look at the night sky, wriggling to be free. He was a city-born toon and almost never got to leave Los Angeles. Even the skits that were “outside” had been filmed on the lot. He had never seen the stars so clearly, Max realized.
But this was only the start of his plan. He carried Yakko down to the shore and set him down in the waves. He realized how awkward it would be for him in a minute, but what choice did he have?
He took off his shoes, socks, and shirt, and hid them in a rocky outcropping. Yakko had by now rolled himself into the ocean and swam carefully in the shallow water.
“What are you doing?” he asked, finally finding his voice. He had puzzled and wondered over what happened, having felt none of the magic but all of the motion of being pulled in and out of reality. Heedless of the ocean Max walked to him, water slowly climbing up his shorts to soak them thoroughly.
“Joining you,” said Max, who waved his wand and let the magic burst forth.
What happened next was indescribable. He would try later, for his friends, but he had no way to speak of what truly happened. Things popped and bubbled and melted and twisted and seared, but his mind had thankfully given up when it became too much and until he emerged from sea foam, made anew.
Under him was a blue mermaid tail that turned red when he moved it just so. It waved at him and slapped at the water, wishing to dive under.
The magic left him again, leaving the wand useless in his hands now. But before he could dwell on it for too long, Yakko swam up to him and tangled their tails up in each other. Now, with Max like this, Yakko no longer felt cold. He felt so warm he might have been the sun.
“What did you do?” he asked, with only wonder in his voice as though he could not believe that anyone would do this for him.
“If I can’t bring you on a date, I thought I should bring myself to you,” said Max. Twin smiles appeared on their faces, and even if everything crashed down upon him later, Max knew he would not regret it.
He was so wrapped in the feeling that he did not notice when the smile on Yakko’s face turned into a grin. He tapped Max’s nose and said, “Tag. You’re it.” Then he dove into the waves like a gold coin sinking into the sea.
“Get back here!” said Max, dropping the wand and with less grace diving into the ocean after him.
It was hard to see in the ocean at night, but Yakko did not stray far from the surface. With every turn and flick of his tail he glittered ahead of Max. He was fast, faster now that he had the entire ocean to swim in, but Max was taller — longer — than him, and once Max had got his bearings he quickly caught up with Yakko, cut him off, and wrapped his arms around him in a bear hug.
“You’re it,” he said, and wow — what an experience it was to speak underwater without the fear of drowning. His voice sounded the same, except for a slight wavering quality about the vowels.
“You have to let me go then,” said Yakko, sounding like he did not want that at all.
“Not yet,” he said, shifting so that he and Yakko were holding hands instead. He swam to the surface and broke through it without a gasp. Yakko followed suit, his eyes drifting up to heavens before looking at Max with stars in his eyes. They had swum so far from shore that Los Angeles was a distant dream. “I never thought I’d get to do this with you.”
“Turn yourself into a mermaid to match your — your boyfriend who also got turned into a mermaid? I doubt that’s a common couples’ thing but I’m not an expert on that topic.”
“Give yourself time. We’ll get there.” Max did not need to use his hands to tread water so he used them to hold Yakko’s face. It fit perfectly in his hands like he was made for him.
But he wasn’t. Yakko had been made for a purpose and then worked tooth and nail to be free of it. And he won — he and his siblings were the stars now, and Max was happy to just be in his orbit.
He wanted to say all of this and more, but what came out of his mouth was, “Sing for me.”
Yakko blinked at him, starlight melting into confusion and worry. “But the last time I did, you nearly drowned.”
“I can’t drown anymore. Look at me.” He waved his tail out of the water, and a faint blue glow of bioluminescence winked out at them from under his scales. “I’ll be fine.”
Yakko was silent, his face a thundercloud of thought. Flashes of worry marred his face, but hope and happiness lined it with silver. Eternities passed between them, empires rose and fell like waves, and humans became naught but monsters outside the burrow in the tales of rabbits. Then time snapped back like a rubber band when Yakko opened his mouth and sang:
I used to hear a simple song
That was until you came along
Now in its place is something new
I hear it when I look at you.
With simple songs, I wanted more
Perfection is so quick to bore
You are my beautiful, by far
Our flaws are who we really are.
There was no room in Max’s heart for fear as the ocean churned around them. From Yakko white waves peaked and fell, and little whirls spun themselves into existence. Silvery fish leapt from the sea, curious and hungry. Sleepy seals and sea lions woke to lazily sing along, their voices harsh and barking and perfectly out-of-tune. Frost flowers lay roots, opened for a moment, and disappeared in the warm Californian sea. Sky-blue lights bloomed on the water, bathing the world in soft comforting blue.
Max could have listened to Yakko sing for hours like this, with the ocean under his beck and call. As his nervousness disappeared, Yakko’s confidence grew and so did his song. Distant whales heard his song and answered with their own, while dolphins trilled a beat behind. Sea-born winds blew and any lingering clouds, wispy and fine as silk, were swept away. Light pollution from the city faded to show stars Max had never seen before. A sweep of Yakko’s arms made towers of water build themselves upwards before crashing again, thousands of confused fish believing for a moment they had become birds. Fish that had no business being near the surface rose like nightmares, glowing like distant dead stars and making promises they had no will to keep. A boatswain’s call, high and sweet, drifted over the sea as confused night fishermen wondered what phenomena to which they were witnesses.
The whistle — a reminder that they were not the only living beings in the world — broke Yakko’s concentration, and the spell melted like snow in spring. Animals retreated and gave them distance, and the waxing moon returned to its full brightness, which had appeared dim compared to all that had occurred.
“So, whaddya think?” asked Yakko, laughing nervously. The blue bioluminescence and some of his confidence had faded away, but joy still shone in his eyes.
“You’re amazing,” he said. Language failed him, so he surged forward and kissed Yakko, hoping to convey everything he felt in action instead of words.
Maybe it worked and Yakko understood. Maybe Yakko’s spellsong still affected him, or maybe he worked magic of his own, because he felt Yakko relax and lean in once the shock had faded. Yakko’s hands found the back of his head, and they disappeared under the surface as one.
~~~~~
They stayed underwater for a while, rising occasionally so Yakko could study the sky and trace constellations he had only ever read about. Yakko did not sing again that night, and when Max tried his voice was wavering and powerless, though Yakko still liked his song anyway. They dove deep into the ocean, letting Max’s tail light the way as they swam past coral reefs and through kelp forests. For hours it seemed they were the only two living creatures the whole world over.
Morning arrived slowly, first as a deep blue then soft lavender. The real world returned to existence as Los Angeles woke up, vehicles chugging on the highway and electric lights drowning the stars once more. Exhaustion settled into their bones, but Max had no desire to sleep yet. Even if he did not have to bring Yakko back to the aquarium before someone noticed he was gone, he found his second wind when he realized that he would not likely visit Yakko today. They swam to shore, deliberately unhurried.
Waiting for them, though, was not an empty beach.
“Good morning, Max,” said a frowning Mickey Mouse, magic wand in hand. His expression softened when he looked at Yakko. “Good morning, Yakko.”
“Uuuuuuuuuuuh, how’re doing, Mr. Mouse?” said Yakko. His face was stiff and he looked ready to bolt, only Max’s hand anchoring him in place. “We’re great? We’re great. Just getting an early start on the day, y’know? The early bird gets the worm, right?”
“And the second mouse gets the cheese.”
“I knew you’d get it! So what brings you here?”
“Well, it’s my beach for one,” said Mickey, pointing at the small villa up the hill from the beach. It was painted a sunny yellow with a red-shingled roof, not unlike the house from one of his children’s shows. “And this is the delinquent son of one of my best friends who has been missing for hours.”
Max’s heart sunk to the tip of his tail and thumped rapidly down there. There was the “Goof luck” rearing its ugly head. How much chaos had he caused?
Mickey did not answer him, not directly. Instead, he peered eastward to the rising sun, studying its ascent. He nodded, whispered a relieved curse — shocking Yakko because he never expected that word to slip out of Mickey’s mouth — and waved the stolen magic wand.
This time changing was painless and quick. Magic showered over him and washed away the enchantment, leaving him shirtless and soaked. He shivered violently from the loss.
Mickey was not heartless and summoned a towel to wrap around his shoulders. However, he was not happy either. Max felt himself lifted up and deposited in one of the beachside lounge chairs. Yakko had also been picked up by the same spell and floated over to him, his tail waving about fruitlessly as if he could swim through the air.
Mickey picked up the volunteer polo shirt Max had used as a disguise, folding it over his arm as he spoke. “I’m going to return this when I bring Yakko back to the aquarium, and you are going to stay here until your father can pick you up.” Then he and Yakko vanished in a burst of green light.
Max watched the sunrise, and then he watched the ocean, deliberately trying not to spiral into anxiety-induced daydreams. He could not move even if he had the strength to do so. Ghostly chains bound him to the chair and clinked every time he shifted. He tried to think of Yakko singing but thoughts of how badly he had screwed up kept interrupting him.
What would his dad say? What would happen to him and Yakko?
Nightmares of him and Yakko no longer being allowed to see each other chased him as he dozed off, until a shadow loomed over him. For a moment he thought he was still dreaming of Dad was a giant holding him and Yakko far apart in either hand.
However, Dad — his real dad — looked more worried than angry.
His brow was furrowed as he looked at Max, taking in his still-damp form and the ghostly chains shaking and clanging. Straining against Mickey’s commands, they remembered Dad and wanted to bind him again. “You look a little tied up, Maxie,” he said. “Need a hand?”
Max reached out his hand, ignoring his dad’s terrible joke. As soon as they touched the chains weighing him down disappeared with a faint chiming, like a grandfather clock. Dad shuddered a bit.
“I never did like that role. I always thought I should have been Fezziwig instead,” he admitted, handing Max clean, dry clothes. He looked away as Max changed. Thankfully Mickey’s neighbors lived far down the beach and were not the sort to be awake only a few hours after dawn, so he was certain no one had seen anything.
They drove from Mickey’s beach house to the ferry. The winding roads made him feel sick, and he was too exhausted to fight against the nausea. More than once Dad had to stop so Max could dry-heave. Sleep clawed at him but anxiety snapped him back to waking whenever he felt close to dreaming. Dad was silent as he drove. There were dark circles under reddened eyes, and guilt leaked out of Max’s heart.
Max managed to doze off on the ferry, rocked to sleep by the ocean. Yakko sang in his dream, perfectly sweet, but when he woke the melody faded from his mind. He felt drained from the loss but did not cry.
After they stopped for drive-through breakfast on their way home, Max spoke. “I’m sorry,” he said, picking at one of his hashbrowns. He had ordered twenty of them in lieu of an English muffin sandwich.
Dad sipped on his single black coffee as they waited for the other cars to inch slowly forward. Traffic in Los Angeles was terrible. “Are you sorry for what you did, or for getting caught?” he asked.
“Both?” Max stopped to think. “Both. Some of it is definitely getting caught, but I didn’t want to worry you either.”
Dad yawned at the reminder of how tired he was. “I’m your dad, Maxie. Worrying is part of the gig. But do you know what you did?”
“I stole from —”
“Everyone steals from Disney,” said Goofy, matter-of-factly. He looked as though he wanted to tell a story about something he had taken but refrained. “Max, you messed with magic. Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?”
“A little? I know more now, but people only kept telling me that magic is dangerous, but they’d never tell me how or why.”
“The why is hard. No one understands magic, and anyone who tries — well, you know what happened to Lon Borax.”
“Who’s that?”
“The man who created the Warners Brothers, and their sister Dot.”
Icy fear crystallized in him. Back when they had only been friends, Max had made the mistake of asking Yakko who his parents were, only to find out he had neither parents nor a creator that claimed him and his siblings as his own. Max had to look up what happened to Lon, but even that was limited to the official statement given by the studio, and a single obituary not long after he had been committed. “Is that how Yakko — and Wakko and Dot — were made?” he asked.
Dad grunted noncommittally. “No one knows for sure, but according to Magica, the man still reeks of magic, even now.”
How a dead man could still smell of anything decades after death and being buried in an iron coffin was something Max did not want to understand. He wondered what he smelled of now, though. Did the ocean still linger on him, or was there magic now? “How bad did I mess up?” he asked.
“If Mickey had been any later, you would have been stuck as a mermaid.”
“Stuck!” he yelled. Shocked, he jumped in his seat, smacking his head on the roof of the car. “But —”
“There would be ways to change you back,” said Dad after making sure his son was ok. “But the price would be high.” Max tried to ask more about that, but Dad only shook his head. “Magic takes what it takes, and gives when it wants to. Promise me you won’t mess with it again.”
He held out his pinky to Max. Without hesitating, he linked his own around it and shook. “I won’t do it again.”
Dad smiled for the first time that morning. Max had not noticed until now. “Thanks, son.” They turned off the highway at the exit for their suburb, letting a comfortable silence fill the car. Then, Dad said, “You’re grounded, by the way.”
“Dad!”
~~~~~
He was grounded for only one day, which was both OK and excruciating. He had been allowed to text his friends that he was not allowed to use his phone for the rest of the day before Dad locked it up and sent him to bed. He slept for a few hours, only to be woken for a late lunch. He wanted to sleep more, but Dad made him do his homework and write an apology letter to Mickey.
The next day he got his phone back before he left for school. As the last part of his grounding, Dad made him take the school bus instead of being driven to school. There were some messages from his friends, laughing at his expense and worrying over him in turn. Dot and Wakko sent him incomprehensible messages of just emojis, and he couldn’t tell if they were thanking him or threatening him. It was probably both, knowing them. They liked him, but they liked their brother more.
There was also a single message from Mickey. It was a link to a shared folder because the video file was too large. It was timestamped for the previous day at some time very early in the morning. Hunching over his phone, Max downloaded the file, put on his headphones, and watched.
The video was a little shaky, and the shadow of Mickey’s thumb filled the frame at first. Near a rocky part of Santa Catalina’s shore, Yakko swam in nervous tight circles before turning to face the camera. He breathed deeply several times, but it was only when Mickey gave him a thumbs-up did he really seem to calm down. Then he opened his mouth and sang one last time for Max.
I’m working on a song
It isn’t finished yet
But when it’s done and when I sing it
Spring will come again
A song to fix what’s wrong
Take what’s broken, make it whole
A song so beautiful
It brings the world back into tune
Back into time
And all the flowers will bloom.
Yakko’s voice washed over him, and like parched tide pools it filled Max and brought back all sorts of things he had not noticed were gone. Contentment laid roots, pride unfurled, precious memories came out of hiding now that the magic was no longer prowling nearby. The gnawing, itching void the magic left behind in him slowly filled and healed over. A breath he did not know he had been holding left him, and for the first time in days, he felt truly at ease as he watched the video one last time before school started. Despite his luck, everything was okay in the end.