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Chapter Text

Thor’s heart clenched when he walked in on a familiar sight. Tony was facedown on the couch with Bruce making him coffee.

“Friend Tony?” he called, trying to remain enthusiastic but it was hard when Tony turned his head to reveal red-rimmed eyes.

“Hey Thor,” he mumbled. “Didn’t know you were back from Asgard.”

“I returned this morning,” Thor came to crouch down next to him. “You seem upset my friend.” He longed to wipe the tears from his friend’s cheeks but held himself back. Tony was in a relationship and Thor would not overstep his boundaries. No matter his feelings toward the genius.

To his horror, tears welled up in Tony’s eyes. Had the fight been that bad this time? Tony had long been in love with Captain Rogers but they fought often despite being in a romantic relationship. Personally Thor thought that the Captain took Tony and his love for granted, often neglecting him and getting annoyed with him.

Tony loved the man though. It was clear and while Thor was jealous that Rogers had gained that affection, he would always remain Tony’s friend and tried to be supportive.

“Friend Tony?” Thor asked in concern before suddenly finding himself with an armful of sobbing genius.

“He dumped me Thor,” Tony choked out.

Thor’s body went cold and a glance at Bruce showed the same anger that was starting to burn in his chest in the scientist’s eyes.

“What happened?” Thor kept his temper under control and cradled the small mortal. He’d wanted to do this countless times but never under these circumstances.

Tony shuddered. “We were having a fight. Over Steve’s constant trips to find Bucky. He was barely in the tower anymore. He-He yelled at me, saying I was selfish and that he couldn’t deal with me anymore. That he was done. I think he means it this time…”

With how rocky and volatile their relationship was, Tony and Steve had broken up a few times, always initiated by Steve. And then he’d come back a month or so later and expect things to just go back to normal. And Tony was so happy and relieved to see him, to ‘be given another chance’ that he let it.

Thor met Bruce’s eyes again. They both wanted this cycle of their friend’s heart breaking to end.

“I think, we need a vacation,” Bruce piped up. “How about a trip to Malibu?”

Tony gave some vague agreement, probably wanting out of the tower and away from it’s memories. Steve had hated Tony’s mansion in Malibu.

“Then a grand holiday we shall have!” Thor declared, sweeping Tony up into a bridal carry and making him yelp. He paused long enough for Bruce to give Tony his mug of coffee which silenced his protests before rushing from the room to help Tony pack and hopefully get his mind off his heartbreak.

"Wow, I never thought Captain America could be such a crappy boyfriend," Darcy whistled.

Thor had come to visit his friends while Tony and Bruce had some science time in the lab. Thor had ended up speaking to Darcy about everything, hoping the woman would have some advice for him.

"Yes," he sighed heavily. "I fear that this will only continue happening.

Darcy studied him with sharp, intelligent eyes.

"You like him, don't you? Tony Stark."

Thor flushed but didn't deny it.

"Do they know?"

He shook his head. "I would never stand in the way of my friend's happiness."

"But does Steve actually make Tony happy?" She asked and the question made Thor pause.

His automatic response was that yes, Tony was happy with Steve. But those were very rare moments between the depression when Steve left the tower and the fights when he returned.

"I believe that Tony loves the Captain. But I do not believe that their relationship makes him happy."

"Do you think you could make Tony happy?"

"I would certainly try my best," Thor admitted. If he had gained the honour of receiving Tony's affection, he would have treated the man like the courted of a Prince deserved to be. "But Tony does not love me. He loves Steve."

"Then woo him," Darcy suggested, sipping at her coffee.

"What?" He blinked in surprise.

"Woo him, court him, win him over," she waved a hand in the air to emphasise her points. "You're a prince Thor. You can beat Captain America. Show Tony you're the better option."

"I don't believe my attempts to court Midgardians are destined for success," he winced as he remembered his disastrous relationship with Jane. He was glad she still remained his friend.

"Well now you know what NOT to do," Darcy pointed out cheerfully. "This is your chance Thor. Show Tony that you're the better option."

"I will not force my affections on him," Thor told her sternly.

"If he says no then back off. But he hasn't said no yet since you haven't tried."

Thor fell into a thoughtful silence. He knew that Midgard didn't court in the same way as Asgard did, but perhaps… it would give Tony the attention he deserved at the very least.

He squared his shoulders and nodded. Darcy gave him some more encouragement before sending him on his way with a cheerful wave and a "good luck".

Thor approached Bruce first, after they'd finally got Tony to actually go to sleep. He was even more adverse to it since after dating Steve he preferred not to be alone in his bed.

"Something on your mind Thor?" Bruce asked as he made himself some tea.

"Yes. I wished to ask your advice in the matter. Lady Darcy has given me her opinion but I wish to ask you as well."

"About what?"

"I wish to court Friend Tony."

Bruce choked on his tea and Thor jumped up to thump him on the back in concern.

"What?!" Bruce finally managed to get out.

"Tony is not happy," Thor started explaining. "My reasoning for not attempting before was that I believed that the Captain made him happy. That… is not the case anymore."

Bruce scowled at the mention of Rogers.

"You like Tony in a romantic way?" He asked after a moment. "You want to date him?"

Thor shook his head. "I want to court him," he corrected. I want to prove that I could make him happy if he were to choose me."

Bruce's expression softened. "I don't know if he's ready to move on yet Thor."

"If I wait too long then the cycle will only begin again and he will remain miserable," Thor pointed out tiredly.

Bruce couldn't argue with that.

"I wish to at least try."

Chapter Text

Thor planned out how to start carefully. He didn't want to ruin it by blundering into things.

JARVIS was very helpful, providing Thor with answers to his questions. Thankfully Thor already knew most of Tony's favourite things so he just needed help in obtaining them.

He was ready two days later and greeted Tony with a cup of coffee. The genius made a happy little noise that melted Thor's heart.

The prince waited until the genius had inhaled enough coffee that he’d been suitably awake before clearing his throat.

“Friend Tony, I wish to ask you something important.”

Bruce quickly made himself scarce while Tony looked up from his mug. “Yeah Pointbreak?”

“I understand that it is difficult to come out of a relationship like this,” he started, watching as Tony tensed and looked away. “I wish to know if you will give me the honour of allowing me to court you.”

Tony’s head snapped back up and his jaw dropped. “What?”

Thor was patient though. He understood that things were different on Midgard and he didn’t want any misunderstandings. “I wish to court you.”

Tony spluttered for a moment. “Uh, Thor, I-um-I hate to tell you this, but I’m not over Steve.” He faltered at Steve’s name and looked away, pained.

“I know my friend,” Thor assured gently. “I am not asking you to enter a relationship with me.” He smiled at the confused look on Tony’s face. “I am asking you for permission to court you.”

“…What’s the difference?”

“Courting is the process of earning your affection. Of proving that I am a better match for you than others. I wish to show you that I can be a better partner for you than Steve Rogers.”

Tony stared at him open-mouthed for a moment.

“Why?” he suddenly blurted out. “I’m a mess Thor. Why would you…”

“I disagree,” the thunderer answered simply. “I believe you to be kind, generous and brave. You are a warrior and an inventor as well as a carer for many people. I believe you are worth it Anthony Stark. And I wish to prove it.”

Tony stared at him with wide eyes.

“May I court you Anthony?” Thor asked seriously.

“It’s just Tony,” the inventor answered faintly before swallowing. “I-uh… Okay.” He didn’t seem like he believed this fully yet but that was fine. Thor would prove himself to be genuine. The prince smiled widely and refilled the genius’ cup with coffee before heading off to begin his courting.

Tony was still staring at his cup in bewilderment when Bruce came back an hour later.

“So he asked you?”

“You knew?!”

“He asked me for my opinion since he didn’t want to end up hurting you. He’s serious about this Tony. So did you say yes?”

“I did, but I’m not sure why. This can’t end well.”

“My advice would be to give him a chance Tony.”

“…What about Steve?

“Steve fucked up all his chances long ago.”

Tony watched the other scientist go with wide eyes. That was unexpected…

“JARVIS?” he asked tentatively.

“Yes Sir?”

“What do you think?”

“I find Prince Thor’s behaviour towards you much more appealing than Captain Rogers’.”

That was polite JARVIS speak for ‘I hate him’. Tony sipped at his cold coffee, feeling like his world had shifted unexpectedly.

When Tony headed down to his lab, he found a bouquet of sunflowers on his workshop desk, away from his current project. Tony blinked at it. How did Thor know what his favourite flower was? Steve just kept getting him roses. And usually only when he was apologising for something, which was rare, or when they were getting back together.

Tony tentatively touched a petal before tracking down a vase to put the flowers in.

“JARVIS, did you tell him about my favourite flowers?” he asked after a moment of staring at them.

“Prince Thor asked to confirm that what he believed you liked was correct. He already knew and just wanted to be certain.”

“Oh…”

Tony tried to go back to work but he kept glancing over at the flowers in disbelief the entire time.

After about half an hour, he called Rhodey.

“Hey Platypus, you got some time to talk?” he asked, injecting false cheer into his voice.

Rhodey wasn’t fooled for a second. “I’ve always got time for you Tones. What’s up?”

It was one of those rare moments where Tony’s voice failed him so he pulled the vase into view of the camera.

Rhodey pulled a face. “Rogers already came crawling back? I’m surprised he finally got the flowers right.”

Tony shook his head although he was a bit surprised at the venom in his best friend’s voice when speaking about Steve.

“This isn’t… this isn’t from Steve. I haven’t heard from him since he left,” he swallowed down the familiar sting that left. They weren’t dating currently. Steve dumped him. Again.

Rhodey frowned. “Then who’s it from?”

“…Thor.”

Rhodey blinked in surprise. “I’ll be damned. Thor finally made a move?”

Tony choked on thin air for a moment. “What?! You knew?!”

Rhodey looked amused at his reaction. “Thor’s not very subtle about his crush Tony. Well, he is when Rogers is around since he doesn’t want to cause trouble for you. But he’s had a thing for you for a while.”

“…he’s courting me,” Tony said numbly, reeling from this little bombshell. Thor had liked him for a while?

Rhodey frowned. “Wait, you’re dating already?”

He shook his head. “No, Thor explained it as… pre-dating? He says he’s got to earn it or something.”

Rhodey studied the flowers thoughtfully. “Well, what do you think?”

“He’s the first person to give me the flowers I like,” Tony blurted.

Rhodey’s eyes softened. “I know. How do you feel about the whole thing?”

“I… I don’t know Rhodey. I still love Steve. And it hurts like hell that he’s not here. But…” he looked at the vase again.

“But it’s nice that someone made the effort of giving you something you liked, something with thought put into it,” Rhodey finished and he nodded miserably.

“Why do I get the feeling that I missed the moment everyone around me started hating Steve?”

“It was the first time he dumped you and then came back like nothing had changed, expecting you to fall straight back into his arms,” Rhodey said promptly. “When we all realised that he treated you like shit.”

“He-He didn’t Rhodey.”

“He did,” his best friend’s voice was gentle. “We all see it. He expects you to change, to agree with him all the time, to change your schedule to suit his needs, to always be there for him. But he never, not once, returned the favour. He’s missed every one of your anniversaries Tony. He’s pulled this breaking up crap four times. He leaves you alone for weeks, sometimes months. He flirted with Sharon in front of you.”

Tony flinched at that reminder. It was one of the few times that Steve got him flowers.

“You know that Sharon almost shot him when she found out that he was dating you when he did that?” Rhodey asked.

Tony shook his head mutely.

“Rogers never treated you right Tony. He reminds me too much of Stone.”

Tony went cold at that. “Steve never hit me,” he found himself saying.

“Maybe not. But the verbal abuse was the same. The belief that he owned you. That you owed him everything while he didn’t need to try.”

Tony stared at the screen numbly and Rhodey smiled sadly. “Go talk to Pepper. I’m stuck deployed for another week then I’ll be home.”

“Pepper feels the same?” Tony asked.

“Yeah. She hates him Tony. Him and Romanov. She’s fine with Sam since he seems genuinely uncomfortable with how Rogers treats you and we’ve seen him trying to talk the bastard out of some things. Romanov only enables his behaviour. Why do you think she and Clint had a falling out?”

Tony’s head was spinning now. Clint was currently off visiting his family but Bruce had mentioned something about the archer stopping by soon.

“Go talk to Pepper,” Rhodey suggested gently and Tony just nodded.

The screen went dead and Tony sat there for a moment, reeling in shock at the revelations. And feeling a sick feeling of dread sink in his stomach.

Did he fall into another relationship like the one with Tiberius? Like the one with Sunset?

He swallowed hard. Did he get blinded by the Captain America myth too? Thinking that Steve could never be like them?

He needed… he needed to think on this.

Tony stood up and headed for the exit, planning to go straight to Pepper. He stopped dead when he found a small box of his favourite chocolates sitting outside. The chocolates that were only sold in a small shop in Belgium.

Sir stared in disbelief while JARVIS watched smugly.

Prince Thor had been more than eager to travel all the way to another country to get Sir’s favourite chocolate.

He was already looking far more promising as a match for Sir than Captain Rogers ever was.

Chapter Text

“He got me an Iron Man plushie!” Tony hissed at Pepper, clutching the adorable toy to his chest. “A plushie Pepper!”

Pepper smiled in amusement at him. She’d become his go-to person whenever he freaked out about something in this whole courting thing.

Which was a lot.

Since literally every present was well thought out and something he loved.

How did Thor even know he had a soft spot for plushies? No one had ever given him one before except for Rhodey! And that was a birthday present from MIT!

(Which was well-loved and still in his closet. It used to be on the dresser but, well, Steve had made an odd comment about them being for children so he moved it.)

“I think it’s adorable,” Pepper cooed, looking at the small toy with it’s oversized head.

Tony narrowed his eyes. “Mine.”

She laughed at him and he pouted at her.

“How are things going with Thor?” she asked him gently.

His pout turned to a thoughtful frown. “It’s… it’s surprisingly good,” he admitted. “He makes me coffee every morning and he’s always saying, you…nice stuff.”

“Complimenting you?” she asked with a sad smile.

Tony looked away from the expression, well aware it was because he was surprised to be receiving compliments at all.

It turned out that hate wasn’t quite the word that Pepper felt for Steve. She loathed him, with every fibre of her being.

He hadn’t realised that all of his friends had grown to dislike his boyfriend-his ex. Rhodey and Pepper despised him. Bruce apparently could barely be in the same room as him without the Hulk wanting out. Thor only managed thanks to his training in diplomacy. And Clint had a massive falling out with Natasha since she supported the relationship and everything about it. Apparently, she’d given Steve tips on… controlling Tony and Clint had flipped.

“We couldn’t tell you anything though since you never believed anything bad about him. You always assumed it was your fault,” Clint had told him with a sigh when he visited. “So we had to make do with cutting our friendships with them. Although I’m pretty sure Rogers didn’t even notice. Too caught up in his Bucky search.”

Looking back on it, Tony wasn’t sure how he’d missed it, the moment that everyone turned frosty towards both Steve and Natasha. Only Sam really didn’t but he did seem to grow a little distant over time.

Tony slumped on the couch, staring up at the ceiling.

“Is this a good idea Pep?” he asked.

“What do you mean Tony?”

“I mean… I can’t just turn off my feelings for Steve. I know you don’t like him… but…” he trailed off in frustration.

“The heart isn’t logical,” she agreed softly. “Tony, we aren’t asking you to suddenly start hating Rogers. All we ask is that you pick a relationship that genuinely makes you happy and a partner that cares about you.”

Tony was silent for a moment. “If Steve comes back… and wants to pick up where we left off, it’ll kill me to say no,” he whispered.

“You’ll have friends to help pick up the pieces,” she told him immediately.

He closed his eyes and wondered what the hell he was supposed to do.

Later that night, after finding a fresh bouquet of sunflowers waiting for him, Tony decided to bite the bullet. He asked JARVIS to pull up footage of interactions between him and Steve over the course of their relationship.

He was a scientist first and foremost, and he’d believe the evidence. He’d just been avoiding looking at it.

He watched blankly as Steve brushed off his concerns or requests, but got angry when Tony was busy with work when he wanted to do something. He watched Steve guilt him out of asking for more time together or anything else in the relationship while he constantly wanted more money or equipment for the search.

He buried his face in his hands as he listened to some of their worst fights, hearing echoes of Tiberius Stone in Steve’s voice and words.

He watched himself back down in every argument, even when he was right and everyone else agreed with him.

How did he miss this?

Tony turned off the footage and stared ahead blankly. He’d fallen right back into a relationship that he’d sworn he’d never fall for again. Steve was just like Tiberius and he wondered numbly if, given enough time, Steve would have hit him too.

The first sob caught him by surprise and he covered his face as he wept for a relationship that had never really been. At least, not the way he thought.

He only vaguely realised when Thor wrapped him up in a hug and carried him out of the lab and to his room. He couldn’t make out his words but the tone was soothing so he didn’t fight the comfort.

He’d be fine, Thor had never hurt him.

He was already falling asleep by the time Thor pulled the blankets over his shoulders.

“Sleep well Tony,” the thunderer murmured and Tony felt a hand in his hair briefly before he slipped into darkness.

The next morning, Tony woke up to find a single sunflower on his bedside table. He stared at it for a long moment before finally coming to a decision and jumping out of bed. He didn’t really care that he was still in yesterday’s clothes or that his hair was a mess. He didn't care that his eyes were red-rimmed and he had a headache from crying.

He found Thor in the kitchen and the prince just lit up when he spotted Tony, holding out a cup of coffee.

Just like every morning. He never looked annoyed, he never complained. He only did it because he wanted to.

It was something he’d done long before this courting thing as well.

“Good morning!” he boomed. He didn’t pry into why Tony had been crying the previous day. He only gave him a smile like he was just happy Tony decided to go to the kitchen this morning.

Well, Tony was pretty oblivious sometimes but he wasn’t stupid. He was a genius in fact. And there was a kind man standing in front of him who knew he currently loved someone else but was willing to patiently try and win him while they were broken up, never hiding what he was doing from Tony and actually getting permission first.

Tony walked up to Thor and accepted the coffee but didn’t drink from it yet. “I don’t know how to stop loving Steve,” he admitted. “But… but I’d like to try.”

He watched Thor’s blue eyes study him for a moment and shifted anxiously. But then the thunderer reached out to tilt Tony’s head back by the chin.

“Are you sure?” he asked gently.

“Yeah…” Tony couldn’t look away. “You said… you said I deserved better.”

“You do,” Thor’s words were serious.

“So show me.”

And Thor smiled and did just that, bending down to press a tender kiss to the genius’ lips. The gesture was so sweet it made tears prick at Tony’s eyes. His kisses with Steve almost always were a build-up to sex. They weren't like this… gentle and sweet.

Thor pulled back slightly and even though there had been no heat to the kiss, Tony still felt breathless.

“You are worth the universe Anthony Stark,” Thor murmured gravely and Tony shuddered at the honesty in his voice.

This could be a huge mistake, getting into a new relationship so soon after Steve screwed him up again. But he couldn’t really help it. Not when he felt so… cherished. He let Thor pull him into a hug and sighed as he leaned against the god’s chest.

“Drink your coffee,” Thor told him in amusement. “Then I believe a date is in order.”

A date. That sounded nice. Tony hadn’t been on one in a while.

He might regret this. But on the other hand, he might not.

Surprisingly, he found himself willing to take that risk.

Chapter Text

Ever since starting his relationship with Steve, Tony hadn’t been able to imagine himself with anyone else. So it was a bit surreal to be going on dates with Thor. The man was sweet and funny and he always seemed to know how to cheer Tony up.

And Tony found himself enjoying this, enjoying having a boyfriend he could expect to see every day, who actively suggested dates and always showed up for them, who spent time with him in the lab just watching him work sometimes.

His friends were thrilled with the relationship although he was sure they’d each given Thor a shovel talk when he wasn’t around. His boyfriend kept glancing at Pepper’s shoes nervously whenever she was around.

He was shocked at how easy everything was with Thor. He didn’t have to fight for his boyfriend’s time. He didn’t have to worry about whether a request for a date would set him off.

And he was surprised that the gifts never stopped. He still regularly got flowers and chocolates and treats from all his favourite places. Tony had told him at some point that he didn’t need to give him presents, but Thor had only smiled and said that he enjoyed it.

What could Tony say to that?

As time passed, he was stunned to find himself thinking of Steve less and less. Sometimes, something would remind him of the super soldier and his chest would ache. But Thor was always there with a smile and offers to cuddle and it drove the dark thoughts from his mind.

The first time they fell into bed together it wasn’t for sex. Tony just didn’t want to be alone in bed anymore and Thor was more than happy to wrap around him under the covers.

Tony hadn’t slept that well in months.

The first day that Tony didn’t think of Steve at all shocked him. He was used to his ex always being on his mind.

“You’re moving on,” Pepper told him.

And he supposed he was. He didn’t feel guilty when he kissed or cuddled with Thor. He didn’t long for a different person to hold him at night. And when they finally did take that last step and fell into bed for a night of passion, Tony didn’t think about Steve at all.

At all.

He was far too busy thinking about other, much more important things in that moment.

Come on, Thor had been alive for centuries. Was it any surprise that a night of sex with him blew any of Tony’s past experiences out of the water?!

Thor was definitely smug about that.

“I think you ruined sex with anyone else for me,” Tony mumbled into his chest. Thor just laughed at him.

And their relationship didn’t change at all after they’d started having sex. Thor didn’t act like he’d ‘won’ or like he didn’t need to work so hard anymore. He woke Tony up the next morning with breakfast in bed. He showed up for a lunch date where they just sat in the lab, talking and laughing. They went flying together, racing armour versus hammer across the skies.

And Tony laughed.

He enjoyed every minute of it. He loved Thor’s exaggerated stories of his youth. He laughed at the messes he’d managed to get himself into. He melted when Thor got all emotional over a sappy romance movie.

He…

He’d started falling for the god.

Tony admitted to freaking out a little at the realisation, calling Rhodey in a panic.

“Does it make me a bad person? To be falling for someone so soon after a breakup?”

“No, it just means that maybe you found the right one this time.”

The right one?

Maybe… he’d never had a relationship where he felt this comfortable, this relaxed. He found that he wasn’t always worrying about messing up now.

He was just enjoying the time with Thor.

Tony smiled to himself as he watched his boyfriend play with the bots in the lab. He was always gentle with them and took all their beeps and whirring seriously like he was having a conversation with them.

(Sometimes Tony wondered if he was. After all, All-Speak.)

He could admit it now. He was happy and probably in love.

So naturally, that’s when the universe decided to try and fuck with him again.

They’d gone out to another new restaurant since Thor loved trying new things and Tony enjoyed spoiling his boyfriend as well. While out, Thor surprised him with a present for their one month anniversary. Tony had been shocked he’d cared about such a small date considering his lifespan and then he’d been stunned silent when he saw the present. A hunk of metal. Not any metal though. Uru. The same metal that made up Thor’s hammer.

Now, flowers and chocolates are all well and good. But his boyfriend giving him a hunk of space metal?! That was something.

Things flew past the pg rating very quickly so they hurriedly paid and left the restaurant. Darcy and Rhodey were hanging out in his penthouse since his tv was the best and whistled as they stumbled out of the elevator, Tony practically climbing his wonderful, brilliant boyfriend like a fucking tree already. Thor didn’t have any trouble with taking his weight though and it was an even bigger turn-on as he picked him up and carried him across the room towards Tony’s (their) room.

Then the elevator dinged again and opened and a voice spoke. It felt like someone dropped a bucket of ice water down his spine.

“What the hell?!”

Tony looked back at Steve, gaping at them in shock and a bouquet of roses in one hand. Natasha stood behind him, expression impassive except for a slight widening of her eyes.

Rhodey cursed in the background while Darcy watched the entire thing like it was a drama show, even pulling her popcorn closer.

Tony stared at Steve for a long moment, looking to the roses now and then. It wasn’t an unexpected sight. They’d fight, he’d dump Tony and go on his mission. And then he’d come back with roses and an ‘I missed you’ and Tony would take him back, despite there never being a proper apology.

And it was always roses. Cliché, easy choice roses. The safe option for anything romantic.

Thor was still regularly giving him sunflowers. Anytime the old bouquet needed to be thrown away, he showed up with a new one. JARVIS assured him that his boyfriend wasn’t even asking the AI so Tony had no idea how he knew.

But he did. And he always showed up with Tony’s favourite flowers. Or his favourite chocolate. Or a suggestion to go on a date somewhere new.

Thor was fucking perfect and it hit Tony like a ton of bricks. His boyfriend was sweet and thoughtful and great in bed.

Bed where they were heading before Steve showed up. Because it was their one month anniversary and Thor gave him space metal.

…

…

Yeah, there was no competition. Fuck Captain America.

Or in this case, don’t.

“No thanks,” Tony chirped before grabbing his boyfriend’s face and continuing their brain-melting kiss.

He vaguely heard Darcy whoop in the background, Steve make a choked-off sound and Rhodey telling them to get to their room already.

Good idea.

“Either you get me to our bed right now, or I’m stripping here Thor,” he said as he pulled back, panting for air. Rhodey made a disgusted sound while Darcy didn’t sound all that opposed to the idea.

Thor, who was a brilliant boyfriend, took the hint and swept out of the room like the damn prince he was, carrying Tony the whole way.

Steve Rogers was so far from Tony Stark’s mind that night that he might as well have not returned at all.

Chapter Text

Of course things were never that easy. Steve couldn’t accept the fact that Tony had moved on after being dumped for the nth time.

He’d somehow gotten it into his head (Tony suspected Natasha) that the genius was only with Thor to make Steve jealous.

In the beginning, Steve acted like it didn’t bother him, ignoring them when they were in the same room with him. They’d always been free with PDA and Tony saw no reason to change that now. When the cold shoulder didn’t seem to work, Steve tried confronting Tony.

“I’m not trying to make you jealous Steve,” Tony told him in exasperation. “You broke up with me, again. Thor asked me out. End of story. Were you expecting me to just be waiting for you after you broke up with me again?”

“You always were before!” Steve burst out.

Tony glared at him. “Well, not anymore. I’m done with that. I want an actual relationship, not someone who only wants a boyfriend when they’re home and it’s convenient since they want sex.”

He left Steve sputtering and cuddled up with Thor for the rest of the day. How had he missed how much of a jerk Steve was?

Then… then Steve decided to try wooing Tony away from Thor. To win him back.

Tony scowled at the roses left outside his lab door again. This was getting annoying. Did he really think that a few bouquets of roses would change Tony’s mind?

He tossed them in the common room bin to try and make his stance clear.

That only seemed to make Steve believe that he had to try harder.

He tried chocolates.

He tried teddies.

He tried tickets to movies and invites to dinner.

To be frank, it was driving Tony insane. Steve had even taken to camping out outside his lab so he could ambush him with memories of the good times and promises to be home more, to go out more.

The words didn’t do anything but annoy Tony who took to spending more time with Thor since that was the only time Steve left him alone.

That might have had to do with the fact that the first time Steve tried to touch Tony around the thunderer, Thor had punched him so hard it knocked him out cold.

Natasha had even got involved, trying to guilt Tony into returning to Steve since he’d ‘obviously’ broken the man’s heart. When that didn’t work, she tried to convince Thor that Tony was only using him to hurt Steve.

She got through one sentence of that bullshit before Thor threw her into a wall. Apparently on Asgard, badmouthing someone’s partner was grounds for a battle of honour or something.

Natasha steered clear of Thor after that, focusing instead on trying to chip away at Tony’s confidence in his new relationship.

It was constant and rapidly wearing the genius down.

And Thor, like the sweetheart he was, noticed this.

“Tony,” he prompted gently when Tony came racing into the room to practically hide under his cloak.

“I don’t know how much more of this I can take Thor,” he mumbled.

“Why do you not tell them to leave? This is your home,” he pointed out.

“The press would eat me alive for kicking out Captain America Thor. Natasha would use that situation in a heartbeat to make things worse,” Tony sighed.

Thor was quiet for a moment before speaking again.

“Come to Asgard with me.”

“What?” Tony poked his head out from the red material to stare at him.

“Come to Asgard,” Thor repeated. “I’ve wanted to introduce you to my mother for a while now and they cannot follow you there.”

Tony blinked up at him in shock. “You want to introduce me to your mom?!” his voice went up a couple of octaves and Thor chuckled.

“Yes beloved. I wish for her to meet you.”

Tony swallowed hard, finally realising that Thor, a prince of an entire realm, didn’t see him as embarrassing. He was actually proud to be dating Tony.

“Okay,” He managed to force the word out in his stunned state.

It was worth it to see Thor’s beaming smile.

They were just wrapping up a tense and uncomfortable team meeting when Thor spoke up, telling everyone that he was making a trip to Asgard for about a month. No one seemed bothered, these trips were relatively common.

Steve practically perked up at the words though and eagerly agreed. No doubt he thought that this was his chance. Natasha was also wearing a slightly smug smile.

Those expressions were wiped when Tony announced that he’d be unreachable for a month too.

“I’m heading to Asgard for the whole ‘meet the family’ thing.”

Steve straightened, no doubt about to launch into reasons why he couldn’t go. Clint cut him off though.

“That’s awesome man! You two are due a couple’s retreat anyway,” he said cheerfully. “You calling in Rhodey to substitute for you?”

Tony nodded his head. “Yeah, so you’re not going to be down an extra team member.”

You could practically see Steve deflate as the only real reason he could use to keep Tony on Earth was taken away.

“I hope you enjoy yourselves guys,” Bruce told them.

Even Sam added on his congratulations. Everyone looked to Steve and Natasha. The Black Widow wasn’t quite glaring at them but it was close. Steve, on the other hand, looked like a kicked puppy.

“Aren’t you done punishing me Tony?” he asked. “You could have just said you were unhappy instead of acting out like this.”

“And dragging Thor into the middle of it,” Natasha added.

Tony studied them both for a moment before realising something. He felt nothing for either of them. He didn’t feel like he should go out of his way to help them anymore. He felt annoyed and just done with the entire thing.

“What you don’t seem to be getting Steve,” he started evenly, “Is that this has fuck all to do with you. I’m not punishing you or trying to make you jealous or anything else that Natasha has whispered into your ear. You broke up with me. We were no longer in a relationship. Thor asked me out and I said yes. I no longer have any interest in a romantic relationship with you Steve. I’ve moved on and I’m happy with Thor. That’s not going to change anytime soon.” He sighed as Steve looked genuinely upset at that information.

“Why didn’t you wait for me Tony?” he asked in frustration. “You always did before. I was doing something important, searching for Bucky! I thought you understood that.”

Tony squeezed Thor’s hand under the table, drawing on all his patience for this. “I waited all those previous times because I loved you Steve,” he told him truthfully. “But do you know how much it hurt me every time you did it? Did you care? I didn’t have a problem with you looking for Barnes. I had a problem with being pushed to the side every single day because of that search. It’s consumed your life Steve. And, as several people have reminded me, I’m worth more than that.”

“You need to get over yourself Tony,” Natasha snapped while Steve looked stricken.

“No Natasha, this isn’t ego. This is a healthy boost to self-esteem,” Clint snapped. “Now shut up. Everyone here knows you only support the relationship because Tony’s easier to manipulate when he’s beaten down.”

She jerked back like she’d been slapped, staring at Clint in shock.

Tony just kept his attention on Steve. “That relationship wasn’t healthy,” He continued. “Not for me. It made me feel like I wasn’t worth your time, like I deserved to be ignored and neglected and the problem in the relationship was me. The constant break-ups didn’t help. And then you always came back with an insincere apology and a comment about how hard things are for you. You never considered things from my perspective Steve. That relationship was killing me. And I’m not going back to it now that I know what a healthy relationship is supposed to be like.”

“I love you,” Steve tried desperately.

Tony shook his head with a sad smile. “No you don’t. If you did, you would have realised how miserable I was all the time. And you would have cared enough to try and help.”

He stood up, Thor following the movement and acting as a supportive presence beside him.

“We’re not going back Steve. So please stop trying.”

“I can’t lose someone else Tony. You know I’ve lost too many already.”

Tony gave him that same sad smile. “It was your own fault Steve. I tried talking to you during the relationship and you shut me down every time. I tried. You didn’t. It’s over and in the past. You know me, I’m a futurist. I only focus on the future, and Thor is that future now.”

A strong arm wrapped around his waist and the couple walked out of the room, picking up Tony’s bags before heading to the roof to call the Bifrost.

“You did well beloved,” Thor told him gently on the way.

Tony let out a breath and leaned into the arm around him.

“Well, it wasn’t half as terrifying as meeting your parents is going to be.”

Thor only chuckled and pressed a kiss to his hair before calling the Bifrost. The couple disappeared in a swirl of colours seconds before Steve burst onto the roof, desperate pleas and apologies on his lips.

“I’ll tell him when he’s back,” he said frantically. “He’ll understand. He loves me. He’ll come back. He’s mine.”

“You can’t own a person,” Clint snarked. “That’s slavery.”

Bruce only shook his head and shot a warning glare at Natasha. “You need to stop this. Tony is happy and if either of you try to ruin that, well the Big Guy will have something to say.”’

“It’s just a month. I can get him back when he’s home,” Steve continued to mutter. “It’s just a month.”

It wasn’t just a month. Frigga adored Tony from the moment she met him and conspired to keep him in Asgard as long as possible so she could get to know him properly. Odin wasn’t willing to bring his wife’s ire on him after her vicious defence of Loki so he didn’t get involved.

Loki was currently restricted to the palace and under a form of house arrest. That changed when the first thing out of Tony’s mouth upon seeing the trickster was “Were you mind-controlled during the invasion?”

That turned into Tony rambling about the evidence he’d seen on cameras after the fact and noticing that Loki’s eyes changed colour after being hit by the Hulk.

Loki was, for once, speechless and Thor and Frigga pounced on the chance to have the charges against him lessened or dropped.

After that, Frigga outright loved Tony. Thor had given the genius a searing kiss as well and left Tony pretty dazed as he dragged the mortal off to his room.

Loki ended up striking up a friendship with Tony after that and Tony barely noticed the time passing. There was always a new piece of tech in front of him or an exciting place to visit. When one month hit he easily agreed to extending the visit.

By the time they’d been there for four months, Tony had practically won the entire realm over. Even Odin was reluctantly impressed by him.

Before they returned home though, Thor got down on one knee and solemnly offered Tony a golden apple and a ring, having researched Midgardian marriage beforehand.

So Thor asked for Tony’s hand in marriage as well as for his future.

Stunned, Tony could only nod and kiss the god he’d long since fallen in love with.

The genius didn’t notice Steve’s expression fall into devastation at the sight of the ring on his finger when they finally did return. He was too busy dragging Thor over to Rhodey to announce his new engagement.

“Are you happy?” Rhodey demanded.

“Yes,” Tony answered without hesitation.

“Then that’s good enough for me,” the colonel grinned at them both, hugging his little brother tightly in congratulations.

Clint threw a celebration party for them that night and no one noticed the absence of Captain America.

Tony least of all.

He was too busy kissing his fiancé and showing off his ring as he talked about Asgard.

He hadn’t lied to Rhodey.

He was happy. Life was good.

(Unfortunately for Thanos, a Tony Stark with access to tech from a more advanced planet was not something he was prepared for and the Titan was vaporised by a satellite in space along with his entire army. Suffice to say, the rest of the universe avoided pissing off Earth after that.)