Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I understand needing to tell someone. I do!” Chat Noir insisted for the third time that night. “I just don’t understand why it can’t be you!”

Ladybug wouldn’t look at him.

“Do you not want to know?” he asked, his heart falling into his gut. 

She wilted. “I want to know more than anything.” 

“Then what’s stopping you?”

“I can’t explain it,” she admitted. She looked at him with glassy eyes. “Can you trust me on this?” 

He met her gaze, but he didn’t have words. She was near tears and he didn’t know if it was because of the thing she couldn’t share or if he had upset her with his pushing.

“I understand if you can’t. I understand if you’re mad.”

He looked away. “I’m not mad,” he insisted. “I just don’t understand.”

They fell into an unhappy silence. 

“I can respect it, LB. You know that I can. I just don’t want to tell anyone else. I want you to be the first to know.” 

And then to his horror she started crying. 

“LB?” 

“I don’t deserve you,” she sobbed. 

“You deserve everything,” he countered. He held her then. And they didn’t say anything. Just sat together overlooking the city that they fought to protect. 

“What if we used the snake?” he interjected into the silence. 

She turned to him. “Huh?” 

“I will use the snake, and tell you who I am. Then if you still think you shouldn’t know, I will reset it and you won’t remember. Then in some weird way you’ll still have been the first to know, and if you still insist, I can then tell someone else. ”

She considered his words. “Okay,” she finally relented. She immediately opened her yoyo and pulled out the Snake miraculous. She handed it to him with a smile.

Chat Noir’s hands started shaking. Whether it was with nerves or excitement, he couldn’t say. He was going to tell Ladybug who he was. And yeah, she wasn’t going to remember unless he could convince her, but still. She’d know his name. 

He slipped on the bracelet. “Plagg, Sass, unify.” And then he turned back to his partner, and she was fidgeting from one foot to the other. He was relieved that he wasn’t the only one feeling the nerves. 

But somehow, her anxiety made his own vanish, and he smiled gently. And she mirrored his expression. “Second Chance,” he whispered. 

“Okay kitty, what’s your name?” she asked with a playful grin.

“Adrien. Adrien Agreste.” He couldn’t spit the words out fast enough. 

He didn’t know what he was expecting. He knew she would recognize the name. She had protected him as a civilian on more than one occasion, and she had recruited him as a temporary hero. So she knew him - at least a little bit.

But whatever he had expected, he hadn’t expected her to start crying. Then she threw herself at him, and his arms automatically wrapped around her. 

“Buginette?” he prompted.

“W-why… Why did you have to be him?” she sobbed into his chest. And he doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t understand why this has hit her so hard. 

“This makes a lot of things make sense,” she said. Her voice was so soft. He wasn’t sure if she meant for him to hear her. 

“Are you disappointed?” he finally managed to ask. 

She jerked back so hard he worried she might have given herself whiplash. But her blue eyes gazed at him, searching for what, he did not know.

“No!” she said. “Never.” And she said it with such conviction he couldn’t doubt it. The tension he hadn’t realized he was feeling dissipated. “This might actually be the best possible answer, but I can’t know who you are. You being Adrien makes that more true. Not less. I’m so sorry.” She choked back another sob.

She wasn’t crying because of who he was, he realized. She was crying because she had to forget. He squeezed her tighter. 

“Why does my being Adrien mean you can’t know?”

She shook her head, wiping her tears from her eyes. And her demeanor shifted into battle mode. “We’re running out of time. You’re going to have to reset. When you do, ask me about Chat Blanc.” 

“Chat Blanc?” 

“I’ll explain! But you have to reset!” She was shouting at him now.

He nodded. Then he flicked the bracelet. 

She was standing before him, no longer in his arms, but she was smiling. Fidgeting again, but smiling in eager anticipation. 

“Okay kitty, what’s your name?”

He offered her a small smile in return, but his eyes burned, threatening tears.

“Are you okay, Chaton?”

“Will you tell me about Chat Blanc?” he asked. 

The blood drained from her face. “You’ve already been through a loop?”

“You didn’t have enough time. You told me to ask you about Chat Blanc.”

She turned away from him, and toward the cityscape. “I hoped you would never learn about Chat Blanc. I’ve been trying to protect you from Chat Blanc.” 

“Please,” he begged. 

She drew in a shuddering breath. “Okay,” she agreed, but she didn’t say anything more. She continued to stare at the skyline. 

“We don’t have a lot of time,” he reminded her. 

“Chat Blanc was your akumatized form.”

His form went rigid. “Why don’t I remember?” 

“It hasn’t happened yet,” she whispered. Her jaw was quivering, her shoulders shaking. “I hope it never happens.”

He couldn't stand it, so he yanked her against him. She remained limp in his embrace. 

“Did I hurt you?” 

She shook her head. “You could have killed me.” His eyes squeezed shut at those words. “But instead, you helped me figure out where your akuma was.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad,” he joked, but he already knew it had to have been awful for her to be simultaneously trembling before him and monotone in her retelling. 

“The moon was in pieces.” 

“What?” 

“Hawkmoth had granted you the infinite power of destruction,” she told him. “And you destroyed… everything.”

He buried his head into her shoulder. 

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled. Her hands rubbed at the back of his neck soothingly. 

“No, don’t say that,” she told him. “It wasn’t your fault, and it hasn’t even happened.” 

“But you remember it,” he countered. And he understood how hard it was to remember something traumatic that no one else even knew had happened. 

She nodded. “The worst part was you were so clearly alone. I don’t know how long you had existed as an akuma when Bunnyx brought me there.”

He didn’t really care how long he had suffered alone. If he had destroyed everything, he felt he deserved it. He had to atone for his actions in some way, if only for falling victim to the akuma anyway. He didn’t say any of this out loud because he knew it would upset his partner. 

“The best part was you had killed Hawkmoth.” There was just a bit of warmth in her voice now, and he smiled.  

“At least I took him down with me.” His bracelet beeped in warning. He only had a minute left, though he supposed he hadn’t said anything yet that he needed to erase. He just hated that he had made her cry. 

She looked up at him again, her eyes clear and serious. “Chat Blanc is why we can’t know each other’s identities,” she said.

“I don’t understand.” 

“I don’t either. Not completely.” She glanced down at their hands, which were entwined together. “But when I cleansed the akuma, you knew who I was. Bunnyx explained that it was our knowing each other’s identities that led to your akumatization. That we couldn’t know yet.”

His eyes watered and there was a rock lodged in his throat, but he managed to keep the tears mostly at bay, and nodded once. 

She leaned forward, touching her forehead to his. “It was never that I didn’t want to know. It was never that I didn’t trust you.” 

He nodded again.

“What’s your name, Chaton?” 

“Adrien Agreste.”

Her sobs were immediate. “This is not fair,” she cried. “I want to tell you my name.” 

He kissed her forehead, and then her hands that he was still holding. “Don’t tempt me,” he said lightly. 

Then he flicked his bracelet before she let anything slip.

He drank in the sight of her smiling face once again. The smile reached her eyes, even as her hands writhed in front of her - the only evidence of her nerves. He knew now that she was willing to trust Chat Noir with everything, that she was almost willing to damn the whole world for him and he was almost willing to let her, and he also knew that Adrien was somehow incredibly special to her. 

Somehow, in the space of ten minutes he had fallen more in love with her.

“Okay kitty, what’s your name?” 

“You told me not to tell you,” he said, his voice barely louder than the breeze. 

She wilted on the spot. “I’m sorry.”

He swept her into a hug. “It’s not your fault, Buginette. You’re just trying to protect the world.” 

She tensed in his arms. “I told you about…”

“Chat Blanc?” he filled in. “Yeah, you did.” 

She started crying, and god damn it! He was hoping to make it through one loop without making her cry.  “I’m sorry,” she sobbed. He rubbed soothing circles into her back. “I never wanted you to know. I want you to know who I am more than I want anything in this world.” 

“I know,” he breathed into her ear. “I understand now. I’m sorry for putting so much pressure on you. You have the weight of the whole world, and I regret that I ever added to it.” 

She shook her head rapidly. “No! You didn’t! You’ve always supported me!”

“And I hope I can bear more of that weight with you now?”

She grinned. “You say that like that wasn’t what you were already doing. You need to give yourself more credit.”

He smiled. “I will try.” 

“Sass, scales rest.” The snake kwami manifested in front of him. “What do you like to eat, Sass?” 

“I’m partial to eggs.”

Adrien groaned. “Why do I always get the difficult-to-feed kwamis?”

Ladybug laughed. “Hey, you only have to feed two of them. You should try dealing with seventeen of them all at the same time!”

Her phrasing struck him. “Do you… do you want me to keep the snake?”

She glanced away, a pink rising to her cheeks. “I was just thinking about what you said. That you wanted to reveal yourself to me. With the snake, you can do that whenever you want. I don’t know if it’s fair. I still think you should tell someone who will remember, but… I am okay with you using the snake so that I can be one of your confidants.”

He couldn’t breathe. They had already established this evening that she did actually trust him, but this… this was a whole new level. He felt dizzy.

“Chaton? You okay?”

“You… You’re not worried about me taking advantage?” 

“To do what?” she asked. 

“I don’t know. Kiss you or something?” 

Was he imagining the blush across her cheeks? 

“Would you do that?” she asked. 

“Not without your permission.” 

“So, what’s the problem?” she asked, her eyebrows furrowed in complete confusion.

His tears crashed straight through the dam of his usually tightly maintained composure.

This time, she hugged him. And he let himself cling to her. “Thank you,” he whispered.

“What for?” she asked. 

He smiled into her shoulder. “For…” and he had no idea how to put what he was feeling into words. “For being you.” 

“You’re so important to me, kitty. You know that right?”

He did now. He pulled away and offered her his most charming smile, and kissed her hand one more time. She definitely blushed that time. “You mean the world to me, too.” 

They just stood there for a minute, smiling at one another. “I guess, I should get home,” she said. 

He nodded. “Yeah, me too.” 

He watched her go, but despite his words he wasn’t ready to go back to his gilded prison. 

Instead, he took off through the city, running. And he didn’t know if he was running from something or towards something.

…

Chapter Text

Free running across rooftops as Snake Noir wasn’t as effective in easing the heaviness on his mind as he had hoped. And the more time that passed, the more Adrien realized that he was getting worse - not better. He came to a stop on a rooftop, and huddled against a chimney, clutching his head in both hands. His akumatized self had destroyed the world.

The whole world. He was capable of that.

He fought for air in shallow rapid breaths, but it didn’t work. The needed oxygen continued to elude him. 

He needed help, and he needed it five minutes ago. He forced himself into a standing position, even as his limbs began shaking. He glanced around the skyline trying to triangulate his own position from landmarks. The mansion was too far away - he’d never make it in time. So it was either Nino or Marinette.

Nino was closer. 

He called for his second chance right outside his best friend’s window without slowing down or coming to a stop. He jumped through the thankfully open window. Nino was sitting with his back to Adrien with his headphones snug over his ears clearly lost in a world of music. Adrien wasted no time in pouncing across the room and seizing Nino in a hug.

Adrien had never clung to anyone so hard. He was shaking like a leaf in an autumn storm, and salty tears came down over his mask in torrents.

Nino stiffened, turned around within Adrien’s embrace, and dropped the headphones around his neck. “C-c-chat Noir?” 

“A-Adrien,” he choked out. 

Nino’s arms immediately tightened around him. He asked no questions, he didn’t react at all except to hold him tighter as Adrien let out violent sobs. Nino just held him until the snake miraculous signaled Snake Noir was out of time. 

“Second chance,” Adrien whispered. And he was outside the window once again, but he didn’t do anything different in the next loop. He just threw himself into Nino’s startled embrace, told him he was Adrien, and every time, Nino’s arms tightened around him. And it got worse before it got better. Adrien would have lost track of how many loops he had gone through if the snake didn’t magically make it impossible to forget. But after twenty-six loops of Nino’s solid consistent response Adrien’s panic finally subsided a bit and he was eventually able to gain control of both his breathing and his tears. 

“Dude, are you okay?” Nino asked. He pulled back a little, but his arms were still on Snake Noir’s shoulders. 

“No,” Adrien said. Even that one word was hard to get out. His voice sounded shaky to his own ears. 

“What happened?” Nino asked, and Adrien was grateful that Nino wasn’t asking a million questions about his being Chat Noir. 

“Today, Ladybug told me why she’s never been able to tell me her identity or let me tell her mine.” 

Nino nodded.

Adrien spoke rapidly, knowing he was on a time limit. “Apparently, our knowing each other lead to my akumatization. And as an akuma,” his voice broke as sobs choked off his air supply once again. 

“It’s okay, dude. Take your time.” 

Adrien sucked in a shuddering breath, and tried again. “As an akuma, I destroyed the world.” 

Nino blinked at him. “W-what?” 

”The whole freaking world, Nino.” Adrien rocked himself back and forth until Nino pulled him into another hug and took over the soothing motion. “I’m so scared.” Adrien cried into Nino’s shoulder, his whole body shaking like an earthquake. “I don’t want to be capable of that. That I could be responsible for the destruction of the whole world?!”

“You’re not responsible for your akuma,” Nino objected harshly. 

Adrien tore away from Nino’s embrace, though he immediately regretted it. His transformed claws tried to tear through his hair, but were met only with the smooth cap of the snake half of his transformation. “But like, it makes me afraid of my feelings, which then just sends me into more of a panic and probably more likely to get akumatized! Nino, I don’t know what to do!” 

His breathing sped up again. It was too fast - like a car headed for a tight corner on a cliff when the brakes were out. Adrien being aware of it did nothing to help slow his breathing back down. He was going to pass out and then he wouldn’t be able to reset the timer, and Nino would know everything. And even though Ladybug had granted permission, if someone knowing his identity could bring on the apocalypse, how could he ever risk it? 

And did that mean he would never be able to share his identity with anyone ? Not Ladybug? Not his friends? Not even a future partner?

“Dude! Breathe!” 

Adrien tried, but he just kept hyperventilating. 

Then the snake bracelet started beeping again, and his panic sky-rocketed. It was too soon. Five minutes just wasn’t enough time.

Nino glanced at it, and then gripped Adrien’s hand firmly. “Dude, breathe in with me okay?” Adrien locked onto Nino’s golden eyes and nodded. Nino took in a deep slow breath and Adrien followed suit. “And out.” 

And they did this for three more breaths.

“I’m not going to remember this, am I?” Nino said. 

“I’m sorry, Nino,” Adrien cried. “Can I have your permission to erase your memory all the time? I know it’s not a fair thing to ask.” 

Nino tightened his grip. “As often and as many times as you need, dude. Don’t ever hesitate. And don’t leave here tonight until you’re okay, okay?”

Adrien cried harder. “You trust me that much?” He could almost understand it with Ladybug. They trusted each other in life and death situations on the regular, but Nino, too?! Adrien didn’t know what he had done to earn such friends.

“Yeah, man. Of course.” 

Chat clung to Nino harder. He had some amazing people in his life. “Second chance.” 

And this time when Snake Noir was outside Nino’s window for the 28th time, he didn’t go in. He let himself just sit on the window sill focusing on getting his breathing under control while Nino stayed lost in his music. Just being able to see him, calmed Adrien down. 

By the 31st loop, Adrien was able to swing himself into the room without immediately tackling his friend from behind. But he made a point of landing with a loud thump.

Nino jumped ten centimeters out of his chair. Adrien almost laughed. Almost. 

“Chat Noir! Is there an akuma? Do you guys need Carapace?”

Every muscle in his body tensed. Shit. “You’re a temporary hero?” 

Nino paled. “Oh no! I thought that was why you were here. It meant that you already knew! Ladybug is going to kill me!” 

“Nino, it’s fine.” And he was confident that it was. His lady trusted him as much as Nino did. It was only her identity he couldn’t know. He knew most of them at this point. Now, it was just hers, the new Queen Bee, and Rena Rouge that he didn’t. “I actually came for a different reason. A personal reason.” 

“A… uh… personal reason?” his friend stuttered, his golden gaze glancing nervously towards the cat themed hero who had landed unexpectedly in Nino’s bedroom. “I don’t know how to say this, man, but I have a girlfriend. And yeah, you’re hot as hell-”

Adrien’s cheeks were on fire. 

“-but I love her and I won’t cheat on her. Not even… with a superhero.”

Adrien shook his head rapidly with his hands up echoing the gesture. “I’m super flattered, Nino, but I was not here for a hookup either.”

“Oh… umm…” And now it was Nino who was super embarrassed, his hands fiddling with his headphones at his neck. “Then, how can I help you?” 

“I… uh… just came to talk.” 

“Talk,” Nino repeated flatly. “With me?” 

“Well, you are my best friend,” Adrien said, and then just waited. 

Nino’s face went through a comical flash of expressions so fast that Adrien couldn't identify any of them. “A-Adrien?!”

“Hi?”

Nino buried his face into his hands. 

“Are you okay?” 

“Fine, dude,” he mumbled. “Just embarrassed.” 

“I said I was flattered.” 

“I can’t believe I thought you were here to proposition me.” 

“I mean, you do look pretty amazing in green,” Adrien teased, pulling out his most charming Chat Noir smile. 

“Dude!” Nino objected, burying his face in his hands. “Please erase the last three minutes of my life.”

Adrien took pity on him. “That can be arranged.” He held up the bracelet on his wrist. 

Nino wilted at the sight. “I’m not going to remember this?”

Adrien barked a genuine laugh. It felt good. “So you do want to remember, then?” 

“Dumb shit should definitely be remembered,” Nino told him, but then turned serious. “So, if we’re on a timer, did you have something specific you wanted to talk about?”

Adrien shrugged and took a seat on Nino’s bed. “Ladybug told someone her identity when she was having a personal crisis. She suggested I do the same.”

“But then why don’t you want me to remember?”

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck, looking for the words to explain. He didn’t have time for the whole Chat Blanc explanation and he definitely didn’t want to start crying and undo all the work Nino had managed to pull off in just a few hours even if he didn’t remember any of it. “I guess the identity rule has been drilled into my head so severely that it’s hard for me to break it?”

Nino grinned. “So you’re taking, like, baby steps!”

Adrien grinned. “Yes! Exactly! Testing it out.” 

“It’s super cool that you’re Chat Noir! You have no idea how happy it makes me that you can escape your golden prison if you need to.” 

The bracelet started beeping. “Whelp! It looks like my carriage is going to turn back into a pumpkin! Thank you, Nino.” 

Nino smiled, and gave Adrien the head nod. “Anytime, mec. Anytime.” 

“Second chance.”

Then Chat Noir was outside the open window again and Nino was once again lost in his world of music. 

“Just one more time,” he told himself, launching himself over the window sill and into the room with the same loud thud.

“Chat Noir! Is there an akuma? Do you guys need Carapace?”

Snake Noir shook his head. “Not this time, Donashello. But your best bro needs ordinary Nino.” 

Nino paled. “Did something happen to Adrien? Did his father hurt him? Does he need a place to stay? He can totally room with me if needed. I’ve already discussed it with my parents. They’re cool with it.”

“Y-you have?” Adrien stuttered, taken aback by how much Nino worried about him, but also apparently planned for him. And now Adrien’s eyes were burning once again underneath his mask, but for an entirely different reason.

Nino stood up and hovered awkwardly. “You okay, dude?”

“I’m fine, Nino.” Adrien managed a huge smile, and yanked Nino into a hug. Nino remained awkwardly limp in his arms. “I just didn’t realize you worried about me like this. You have it worked out with your parents that I can just... stay here? Like whenever?” 

“A-Adrien?!”

“In the flesh!” 

Nino finally enthusiastically returned his hug. “Dude! No way! You’re Chat Noir?!”  

“The one and only!”

“This is so cool! And then Nino paled and pulled away. “Why are you telling me this now? I thought secret identities had to remain secret. Are you okay?” 

“I’m doing a lot better thanks to you and the snake.” 

Nino glanced at his altered transformation. “Oh. I’m not going to remember?”

Adrien wilted. “I wish I could tell you. Turns out knowing my identity specifically might be really dangerous.”

“I get it, dude. I’m a target of Hawkmoth, too.”

Chat frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Hawkmoth has made a copy of me twice now. Once as Nino and another as Bubbler.”

Chat Noir winced. Right, the Carapace sentimonster was Nino. “I hadn’t even thought about how you might feel about that. I’m sorry. I’ve been too wrapped up in my own head. What does it feel like to be impersonated?” 

“It sucks. I worry that he’ll do it again. And that my friends and family will trust the imposter. And then become hostages or worse!” 

Adrien nodded. “Yeah, I don’t know what I’d do if Hawkmoth used my family against me like that.” And it felt good to be the one listening and supporting for once, even if Nino wouldn’t remember. “What can we do?”

Nino shrugged. “I don’t know, mec. Ladybug was able to catch my imposter because he didn’t interact with Alya the way I normally do.” 

Adrien’s brain was whirling. He could definitely fix this - or at least mitigate it. He just needed to talk to Alya and she would get Nino set up with some kind of password for everyone in his life.

His bracelet beeped its first warning. 

“Thank you, Nino.”

Nino’s eyebrows scrunched together in bafflement. “What for?” 

“For tonight. We’ve actually gone through this same five minutes 32 times now.”

“Thirty-two?!” Nino repeated. “Dude! That’s like… what?”

“Almost three hours,” Adrien filled in. “I wasn’t in a great space when I got here the first time. That’s what I’m saying. You told me not to leave until I felt okay.”

Nino hugged him again. “I take it you’re doing better now?” 

“Much better now. You talked me through the worst panic attack I’ve ever had, and then you made me laugh when you thought I was here to proposition you.” 

“I did what?” 

“You thought I was here to sweep you off your feet!” Adrien teased. 

Nino buried his face in his hands. “Please never tell me that I did that again.” 

Chat barked a laugh. “Apparently, you think I’m hot as hell.”

“But you already knew that,” Nino argued.

“I didn’t, actually. But if it makes you feel better, I’m apparently no competition for one Alya Césaire. You would have turned me down cold.” 

Nino laughed. “Oh man, I would get so many brownie points for turning down a superhero for her.” 

“Either that, or she’d hit you upside the head for being an idiot.” The miraculous was now rapidly beeping. “I'm out of time. Thanks Nino, for talking me down tonight.” 

Nino grinned. “Anytime, bro. Come by anytime. I mean it. Even if I won’t remember. Any time.” 

“Thanks man. I’ll totally take you up on that.” 

…

Chapter Text

Chat Noir was wearing the snake miraculous this evening as he always did now, but he hadn’t activated it. Tonight, he needed Alya to remember he had been there. He landed on the balcony of Alya’s bedroom and peered into the room cautiously. He had never actually been here before, and wanted to confirm he was in the right place. 

Sure enough, Alya was sitting at a computer across the room. 

He tapped on the glass. She looked up, and her amber eyes widened when they landed on him. He waved. She got up immediately, and slipped through the sliding glass door. 

“Sorry to drop in on you like this,” Chat said.

She smiled warmly. “To what do I owe the pleasure, Chat Noir?”

He couldn’t help the hand that went to the back of his neck. “Well, this might seem like it’s out of nowhere, but I was… kinda worried about Nino?”

Her eyes popped out of her head. Whatever she had been expecting, that had not been it. “What? Why?”

“Well, Hawkmoth has impersonated him twice now. Once as actual Nino and another as Bubbler. It seems like Nino has become a target. I just… if it was me, I would worry about my friends and family mistaking an imposter for me. And I would want to protect them.”

If anything, Alya’s eyes grew larger. “I don’t know if Nino was the target,” she whispered. “I think Hawkmoth is using him to get to me.”

Chat frowned. “Why would Hawkmoth be targeting you?”

“I… uh… I think he thinks I have a special connection with Ladybug… you know, because of the Ladyblog.”

Chat Noir nodded. “I suppose that makes sense.” 

She sighed and leaned against the railing next to him. 

“So what do we do?”

He stared out into the skyline. “I was thinking it would be fairly easy actually. You and him just need to set up some kind of call and response code. Something that only you and he know. You could tell him to do something similar with all the people he’s close to. And maybe you could do the same with people in your life… if you’re worried.” 

She nodded. “That sounds good.” Then she considered him for a moment. “Why did you come to me instead of going to him directly?”

He tensed at the question. He had been rather hoping she wouldn’t ask that. Honestly, he could have mentioned it to him as Adrien, but he felt that Adrien had less reason to notice something was up with Nino, and Adrien didn’t exactly have the background to be thinking about threats constantly. His father hired people for that. And Alya and Nino - they were just super close - and seemed to communicate well. He just thought Nino would be more receptive if the idea came from his girlfriend. But it’s not like he could explain all that. 

But maybe, he could explain some of it. 

“Well… uh… I don’t know him?” he lied.  “But I do sort’ve know you. And I’m sure he would take it better coming from someone he knows and cares about rather than a random superhero.”

She scoffed. “You’re hardly some random superhero, Chat Noir.” 

“Nice to know I have a fan,” he purred, waggling his eyebrows playfully. 

She shoved him back with an eyeroll and he grinned. “Stop,” she scolded. “You know I have a boyfriend.”

He smoothed out his face and gave her a genuine smile. “You are both very lucky to have each other.” 

She smiled. “I definitely think so. Thank you, Chat Noir. I appreciate you looking after my boyfriend this way.”

He gave her a two-fingered salute. “Of course! Just doing my job.” He was about to leave, but then he hesitated. “Do you have a pen and paper?” he asked. 

“Uh… sure. Give me a second.” She slipped inside and returned with his requested items. 

“If you run into any issues that need my attention, this is my username on the Ladyblog. You can DM me.”

She blinked at him, at the offered paper stupidly. “Oh my god!! You’re on my blog?!”

He grinned cheekily. “Of course! I am Ladybug’s biggest fan after all. And you seem to have the best scoops in that regard. I don’t know how you do it! Sometimes, it seems like you know her better than I do.”

She burst out laughing. “Well, a girl can’t give away all her secrets, now can she?” 

He smiled again. “I suppose not,” he said. “Thank you, Alya.”

“No, thank you, Chat Noir.” She stepped forward and he stepped easily into the offered embrace. He squeezed her tightly.

“For what?” he asked as he pulled away. 

She smiled sincerely. “For everything you do.” 

He blushed at the praise. “Like I said. All in a day’s work. See you around, Ladyblogger!” 

“See you, Chat Noir!” 

And he launched himself back into the sky. 

… 

He should have gone back home. It was what he had planned on. He had a history exam coming up next week that he wasn’t entirely prepared for. But he was already so close by, and he couldn’t help but want to check in on Nino. He would set the time loop, check in on how Nino was doing, reset it, and head home without Nino ever knowing he was there.

He landed in a crouch in Nino’s bedroom.

His friend was sitting on his bed, swiping through his phone. His golden eyes snapped towards Snake Noir the second he had landed. His eyes narrowed. He did not so much as crack a smile. 

Something was wrong. 

“Is there an akuma?” Nino bit out, his voice hard and unwelcoming. 

Adrien shook his head. “No,” he said, and then frowned. “Dude, are you okay?” 

“What do you want?” Nino demanded, ignoring his question entirely.

Snake Noir took a step backwards. “Nino?”

“I think you should leave,” Nino said, and turned his gaze away from his unexpected guest. 

But Adrien didn’t want to leave. Not when Nino was so clearly upset. “Nino, it’s me. Adrien.” 

Adrien expected Nino to soften and pull him into a hug like he had every time Adrien had revealed himself, or at least explain why the hell he was so upset. But that’s not what happened. 

Nino eyes shot back towards him, wide with shock. “W-what?!” He took in a shaky breath. “Dude! How could you do this to me?!” Nino was screaming now. He had bolted to his feet. 

Adrien took another step back, raising his hands in surrender. “Nino! What are you talking about?” 

“Like you don’t know!” Nino snarled. 

“I don’t know!” Adrien insisted. 

“I think you should leave.” 

“What?! Nino! Please! Can we talk about whatever this is?” Adrien begged. 

“No! I don’t think we can.”  

“Second chance,” Adrien mumbled to himself, and he was outside Nino’s window. He glanced at Nino’s slumped form sitting on the bed for just a second before vaulting upwards to the roof of the building. 

He sat down on the tiled roof. What the hell had happened? Why did Nino hate him now? What had he done? Adrien’s hands were shaking even transformed. Nino was his rock, and now he felt adrift without that support. 

He lost the transformation and pulled out his phone, and immediately dialed his best friend. It wasn’t Adrien he was mad at - at least, not until he knew Adrien and Chat Noir were the same person. But why the hell would Nino be angry with Chat Noir? 

Nino immediately answered.  

“Hey dude,” Nino greeted, his voice sullen. 

“Nino, what’s wrong?”

Nino sighed. “I think Alya is cheating on me.” 

“What?” The idea didn’t even compute, it was just too incomprehensible. 

“With Chat Noir.”

“What?!” Adrien said again, more in shock. 

“Dude, I don’t know what to do!” 

And Adrien could hear Nino’s pain. He had to fix this. It was clearly a misunderstanding.

“I’m here,” Adrien told him. “Now, explain this to me from the beginning. Why do you think Alya is cheating on with you? And with Chat Noir?” 

“She’s… been off for awhile now. I don’t know what’s going on, and I didn’t want to pry. She usually will tell me things when she’s ready. But she started missing a bunch of our dates, and her reasons… they don’t sound… right.” 

“What does that mean?”

“It means… I think she’s lying.” 

“Could there be any other explanation?” 

“For the avoiding me and making weird excuses? Probably! But I saw her earlier today with Chat Noir.”

“Okay, did you see them kissing or something?” Adrien asked. He knew there hadn’t been anything to see. He had maybe flirted a tiny bit, but even then she had only rolled her eyes and chastised him. 

“Nothing like that, really. But she was laughing. She was so at ease, open, and lively. And I… I haven’t seen her like that in… weeks.”

“Nino…” Adrien trailed off, uncertain what to say. “I don’t claim to know what’s going on with Alya, or why she’s been distant. But she wouldn’t do this to you.” 

And neither would Chat Noir. 

“You didn’t see them together!” Nino shouted, and Adrien had to pull the phone away from his face. “I know what I saw!” 

Adrien’s phone buzzed. And he opens it to reveal a picture of Alya and Chat Noir in a hug. 

“Nino, this…” how did he explain this wasn’t what it looked like? “There’s no way Alya would cheat on you. Not even with a superhero.” 

Nino dissolved into tears. “I just don’t know anymore. She’s hiding something. And I don’t want to pry, but my mind just keeps going in these spirals and I don’t know how to get it to stop. I just can’t… help but wonder if she doesn’t love me anymore. And she’s always loved the heroes. It would be difficult to compete with a guy like that.”

“Nino, what are you talking about?!” Adrien asked, wanting to point out that Nino was a hero, too. “You’re a fantastic catch!”

“Sure, but he’s Chat Noir! Have you seen his butt in leather? And he’s funny! And… charming! And who even knows how many times he’s saved Paris!”

Adrien was grateful this wasn’t a video call, but he could still feel the heat from his cheeks to his ears. 

“He flirts with everyone!” Nino continued.

Adrien stiffened. He didn’t flirt with everyone. But he had flirted a tiny bit with Alya earlier, but he hadn’t meant anything by it. He was just being friendly. 

“He could totally steal away someone’s girlfriend!”

Whether or not that was true (and Adrien had his doubts), Adrien knew he would never do that. 

“Or even someone’s boyfriend!”

Seriously?! 

“Does Alya need to be worried about you coming on to Chat Noir?” Adrien interjected.

“What?! No! I would definitely put him in his place! I love Alya so much!”

“And she would do the same!” Adrien insisted.

Nino didn’t say anything. And a few seconds later, he realized Nino was crying. His visit to Alya had made Nino cry. He had only been trying to help. He had to fix this. 

“Nino, I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean…” he trailed off sadly. He couldn’t truly say what he wanted to. Not without revealing himself. Which… he probably would have if Nino wasn’t so pissed specifically at Chat Noir.

“You don’t understand,” Nino sobbed. “Chat is not just some superhero to us.”

“He’s not?” Adrien asked cautiously. He really hoped this wasn’t going where he suspected it was going. 

“Alya and I know him.”

“He has saved you both more than once,” Adrien said. Please, take the excuse. Please take the excuse. 

“No!” 

Adrien could hear Nino pulling his own hair out in frustration.

“That’s not what I mean,” Nino said. “Dude, can I tell you something? I’m not supposed to, but I’m going to lose it! I don’t know who else to talk to about any of this!”

Adrien squeezed his eyes shut. It didn’t really matter if Nino told him what he already knew, did it? But he knew Ladybug might feel differently about it. 

Of course, he didn’t have to say anything to Ladybug. What was more thing he couldn’t talk about? 

“You can trust me, Nino,” Adrien assured. 

“Alya and I are superheroes, too.” 

“You and Alya?” Adrien repeated, covering his face with the palm of his hand. How did he not see this coming?! Ladybug was going to kill him. 

“She’s Rena Rouge. And I’m Carapace.”

Which made so much sense it wasn’t even funny. He was so close to losing it to hysterical laughter anyway. 

Seriously, was everyone he knew a superhero? Who was next? His father?

“Please say something,” Nino begged and Adrien shook himself out of his thoughts. 

“Wow,” Adrien said. “You’re a superhero! What’s that like?”

“Dude! I can’t even explain it. It’s exhilarating, and terrifying, and I don’t know how, out of everyone in all of Paris, Ladybug chose me to help her.”

Adrien smiled. Yeah, that was a pretty amazing feeling - the only fond memory he had as his time as Aspik. 

“I mean, Alya showed me some footage of Anansi. You were pretty badass even without a miraculous. It doesn’t surprise me that Ladybug would recognize that.” 

“Thanks, dude. That means a lot. I just… I don’t want to be mad at Chat Noir. He’s my friend.” 

Adrien found himself tearing up. 

“Or he was,” Nino added on. And Adrien sighed.  

“Nino, this isn’t really about Chat Noir. This is about your relationship with Alya. Do you trust her?” 

“I don’t want to be mad at Alya even more than I don’t want to be mad at Chat Noir.” 

“Have you talked to her about any of this?”

“No,” Nino admitted. 

“I’m telling you, Alya loves you. She wouldn’t do this. Not even a superhero who she happens to work with or be friends with. You’re her hero.”

“You really think so?” 

Adrien snorted. “Yeah man, I really do. Will you please go talk to her before you make assumptions.” 

“I don’t know where to start,” Nino said. 

Adrien thought for a second. “You could probably start with what you told me. Tell her that you feel like she’s been avoiding you. See what she says.”

Nino laughed. “You don’t think I should start with accusations?”

“I mean…” Adrien hedged. He wasn’t going to lie. He was definitely scared of Alya. Just a little bit. “I wouldn’t?” 

Nino laughed. He actually laughed, and Adrien breathed a sigh of relief. “Alright dude. Thanks for talking me off the cliff. I’ll call her now, and see if we can meet up.”

The call ended and Adrien stood up, hoping that Nino’s conversation with Alya went well. He knew that hug had been her thanking him. Surely, she would explain and everything would be fine. 

He transformed and ran across rooftops anyway. He wouldn’t be able to stand it if Nino hated half of his identity. He wouldn’t be able to visit anymore, even with the snake. 

Adrien had to have faith in Alya. It would be okay. 

… 

Nino knocked on the door. Etta answered. Or maybe it was Ella. Honestly, Nino hadn’t learned to tell them apart yet, and today, it wasn’t his highest priority. 

“Alya! Your nerdy boyfriend is here!” 

“Hey! Be nice!” Alya chastised her younger sister. And then she pushed her sister back into the room as she came out on the patio, closing the door behind her.

The beaming smile she offered him went a long way toward soothing his tortured feelings. Adrien was probably right, but there was still an inkling of doubt that he couldn’t quite quash. He managed a weak smile back. She deserved more. 

“Nino! I was just about to call you!”

“You were?” 

“You won’t believe who paid me a visit earlier today?!” she told him, her voice literally oozing with excitement. 

“Chat Noir?” he guessed, unable to keep the tension out of his voice. 

Her eyebrows furrowed together. “How’d you know?” 

He pulled out his phone, and flipped to the picture. “I was on my way to visit you.” He squeezed his shoulder, trying to reassure himself.

She took the device from him eagerly, her smile only widening. “This is such a good shot! I’m so happy you caught it!”

“You are?” He might have sounded a little accusatory. He was trying to clamp down on it, and not start with accusations like Adrien said. 

She glanced at him, startled. And for the first time, she seemed to sense something was off. “Nino? What’s wrong?”

“Okay, so this might seem ridiculous, but what does Chat Noir mean to you?”

Her eyes narrowed for a second, and then went wide as she rapidly connected dots. “Oh my god! Are you serious right now?! You think that I would do that to you?” Her eyes had returned to hard narrow slits; she was pissed! 

But for the first time in his life, Nino was thrilled that she was furious with him. Her anger put to rest all his fears. “I’m sorry,” he said. “It’s just you’ve been so… distracted lately. And you’ve bailed on several of our dates and it feels like when I ask, you dodge the question.”

She softened. And he barreled forward. 

“I didn’t know what to think! I was actually coming over to talk to you about it when I saw you so... umm... friendly with Chat Noir. And I just… I haven’t seen you that open and happy in awhile. So I can’t help but wonder if I’ve done something wrong?” 

He was wringing his hands. He didn’t even realize how much he was hurting himself until she took both his hands in hers and rubbed soothing circles with her thumbs onto the back of his hands.

“You’ve done nothing wrong,” she reassured, her eyes staring straight at him. “I’m sorry. I have been distracted, but it wasn’t anything to do with us. It’s just a bunch of Marinette stuff. And… she didn’t want me to talk about it with anyone else, and it’s all driving me crazy, so I just… I’m having a hard time being completely there the rest of the time.” 

“But… you looked so happy when… Chat Noir was there.” 

“Nino! He’s a superhero! And I run a superhero themed blog! I get a little fan girly, it’s true.”

She pulled him into a hug. And he melted into her arms. 

“The truth is,” she murmured into his ear, “I feel like I don’t have to pretend around you. I didn’t mean to push you away. I was feeling overwhelmed and stressed. And around you, I thought I could just be low and it would still be okay.”

His arms tightened around her. His eyes were burning with threatened tears. “I’m sorry I doubted you. Doubted us. I want to be able to be a place where you can be less than one hundred percent and still feel loved and supported. I’m sorry I didn’t live up to that.” He was horrified that his voice cracked on his last word. 

She pulled away just a bit, and pressed her forehead to his. “I didn’t tell you that to make you feel guilty. I told you that because I love you. And next time I’m feeling detached, I will try to tell you so you don’t have to worry or wonder.”

He leaned forward and kissed her, letting the last of his hurt roll off his shoulders. “I love you so much.”

She smiled, and kissed him again. “I love you, too.” 

They hugged, and Nino just let himself stay wrapped up in her familiar embrace. 

At least until she pulled away with furrowed eyebrows. “Chat Noir was here like… hours ago. I only didn’t call you immediately because I had to watch the twins. Have you been stewing in this that whole time?” 

Heat bloomed across his face, and he wanted to duck his head behind his hat, but this was Alya. He didn’t want to hide from her. “Yeah… I was really upset,” he admitted. “I assumed the worst, and kinda wanted to track down Chat Noir and start a fight.”

“Nino!”

He held up his hands. “I know. I know. But Adrien called me at like the perfect time, and he kinda talked me down. He was insistent that you loved me and that you would never cheat on me.” 

“I’ll have to thank him,” she said, smiling. 

“You and me both,” he said, fidgeting with the brim of his hat. “So… ummm… am I out of line if I ask what you and Chat Noir were talking about?”

“I was going to tell you anyway! Before you freaked out on me! But yes, if you must know, we were talking about you!” 

Nino blinked for a minute. “What? Me?” 

“He was worried about you.” 

His eyebrows scrunched together. Chat Noir was worried about him? And here Nino had been thinking the worst of the superhero. “But why?” 

Alya reached out for his hand, and their fingers were quickly threaded together. “He was worried at how much Hawkmoth has been targeting you, that he has been impersonating you. He thought that maybe it might happen again, and he was worried about how it might be affecting you mentally. He suggested I get you to come up with some call and response passwords with the people in your life, so you could protect yourself and your loved ones.”

Nino’s eyes could not get wider. “Really?” How had he completely misjudged the whole situation so badly? Chat Noir wasn’t trying to steal his girl at all - the hero was trying to look out for him and her by extension. Chat Noir was like, literally reading his mind, and coming up with ways for Nino to address his fears head on.  

“Really,” Alya said.

“Why did he go to you instead of me?” he asked, feeling sheepish, embarrassed, and a tad bit guilty.

She shrugged. “Honestly, I think it’s just because he knew where I lived.” 

Nino laughed, and pulled her to him once again. His head rested on her shoulder. “Tell me that you love me.” 

“I love you,” she said, her tone smiling even if he couldn’t see her face.  

“How much?” 

“More than a superhero.” 

He grinned. “That should be our call and response code.”

She rolled her eyes. “If it makes you feel better.”

“But only if I ask you to tell me you love me, or vice versa. We don’t want other people to overhear it.” 

She nodded sagely in agreement. “Sounds good.” 

“I’m sorry I was an idiot.”

“You’re my idiot.” 

She urged his head upwards, and then she was kissing him. 

He smiled against her lips, his hands snaking around her waist. 

He really was a lucky guy.

…

Chat Noir sat across on a rooftop across the street from Nino’s empty bedroom. His legs were kicking back and forth in a way that would have seemed playful to anyone that didn’t know him well, but actually was a sign of how anxious he felt. 

He breathed in a deep sigh of relief when Nino returned to the room with a huge grin plastered on his face. As soon as Nino had closed his bedroom door, Chat launched himself across the street and into the room, landing with his trademark thud. 

Nino looked up at him in surprise. “Ch-Chat Noir! Uh… hey!” 

“Hi Nino,” Adrien said, his voice subdued. 

It was silent, and Adrien didn’t know what he was waiting for. He had come here with the intention of clearing the air. He hadn’t even transformed with the snake. He wanted to come clean. He spun the ring around his finger. This would be it. Nino was going to know who he was, and he wouldn’t be able to take it back. And he didn’t even know why he was nervous. He had told Nino dozens of times at this point, and his reaction had always been rock solid. 

Well, except for the last time. 

Maybe that was the problem. 

“So… uh… Alya, didn’t seem to think you knew where I lived. I’ll have to tell her that she was mistaken,” Nino said. 

Adrien nodded. “I may have led her to that conclusion. If it’s all the same to you, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t rat me out.”

Nino frowned. “Is there a reason you don’t want her to know?” 

“There is actually, but I can’t explain it yet. Maybe later?” 

“You’re being awfully cryptic tonight, dude.” 

Chat rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, I’m just a bit nervous.” 

Nino stared at him, his eyes blinking in shock. “You’re nervous? Why?!” 

“You seemed pretty pissed at me earlier today.” 

Nino frowned. “How do you even know about that?” 

Chat’s gaze dropped again. “I may have cheated?”

“Huh?” 

“I’m wearing the snake miraculous.” 

“That’s the one that creates a time loop?” 

Chat Noir nodded. 

Nino eyed him up and down. “You don’t look any different than normal.”

“I haven’t activated it yet, but I’ve been using it to, well, cope, I guess would be the best word.” Chat Noir trailed off.

“Cope? Cope with being a superhero?” Nino guessed. 

“Yeah, it allows me to confide in someone without anyone remembering. And honestly, you’ve been really supportive the last few weeks. You have no idea.” 

Nino’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What? But I don’t…” 

“Remember? Yeah, I know you don’t. That’s what I’m saying.”

“But you’re not transformed now, so that means I’m going to remember this conversation.” 

Chat nodded.

“So, what’s different about today that I get to remember?” 

“I just… the last visit made me realize that I wanted you to know this was happening. I want you to remember giving me permission to do this.” 

“I’ve given you permission to do this before?” 

Chat nodded again. “I realize the why might not make sense to you, but you did.”

“Why me?” 

Chat Noir looked up with a small smile. “What? Don’t think you’re good enough?” 

“That’s not what I meant! It’s not everyday that you learn that you are the secret confidant of one of Paris’s superheroes and don’t even know it!” 

“Because you’re definitely good enough! You saved me from being akumatized like I don’t know how many times.” 

Nino frowned. “We’re not like having a secret affair or something are we?” 

Chat laughed. “Umm… no, but you know, I’m beginning to think you have a crush on me.” 

Nino blushed. “It’s a celebrity crush!” he defended. “Leave me alone! I didn’t know that we knew each other outside of akumas that well.” 

“Well, I’d like to explain everything to you if that’s okay. Clear the air so to speak.”

“On a timer? Or without?” 

Chat took in a deep breath. “You choose.”

“What do you want?” 

“I really want you to remember this time, but it might be dangerous.”

“Dude! As you totally already know, I’m already a target of Hawkmoth.” 

“Which is probably a reason I shouldn’t let you remember this. Which is part of the reason you let me erase your memory over and over again.” 

Nino frowned. “How often have we uh… done this?” 

Chat Noir winced. “Ummm… I don’t know?” 

“Shit dude. That’s…” Nino looked away. “Answer one question for me without giving away the thing you’re worried about?”

“Anything.” 

“Why did I agree to it the first time?” 

Adrien thought about it for a moment. What could he say? 

“You saw me have a breakdown where I was likely to be akumatized. I needed to talk to someone, but it wasn’t safe for me to talk about any of it without literally risking the world. You told me not to leave this room until I was okay.”

“And would you be risking the world by telling me now?”

Chat gripped the back of his neck. “Ummm… I don’t think so?”

“Dude! That’s not reassuring.”

Chat’s claws tore through his hair. “Yeah… you’re right. We can do it the other way. I’ll transform and set the timer, and explain everything. Then with context, you can make an informed decision about whether you want to remember or not. But either way, now you’ll at least remember that this is something that happens on the regular. You won’t bite my head off or assume that I’m trying to steal your girl when I’m talking to her.” 

“Thank you for that by the way.” Nino’s voice is small. And embarrassed. 

“For what?” 

“Talking to my girl? Apparently you were worried about me?”

“Yeah…”

“I’m sorry,” Nino said. “For assuming the worst.” 

Chat Noir shook his head. “It’s fine.” He wasn’t sure if it was, but he understood now why Nino had reacted the way he had. “I’m used to far worse.” 

“That doesn’t make me feel better, dude,” Nino told him, his eyes staring at him with a concern that Adrien was far too familiar with.

He pasted on a bright smile. “Well, let’s get this show going, yeah?”

“Sure,” Nino said, taking a seat on the edge of his bed. “What do I need to do?” 

Chat grinned. “Nothing. I got it covered. Sass, Plagg, unify!”

Nino put a hand over his eyes to block out the light. “Woah, dude. That’s quite the light show.” 

Snake Noir laughed. “Second chance.” 

“Alright mec, lay it on me,” Nino said. 

Snake Noir took in a deep breath, and then looked right at Nino. “I’m Adrien.” 

Nino paled. “What?”

“I’m Adrien,” he said again.

Nino’s eyes were as wide as the Seine. “Dude! You came here earlier when I was pissed at Chat Noir?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Please tell me I didn’t hit you,” Nino said, his eyes never leaving Adrien’s masked face.  

Adrien frowned. “You didn’t hit me. Were you worried that you might’ve?” 

“With where my head was at? I definitely wanted to punch you. Chat Noir, you, I mean.” Nino cringed. “I guess… that’s not much better.” 

Adrien tried to smile, but didn’t pull it off. “Your… umm… hostility toward me was a bit of a shock,” Adrien conceded. 

Nino snorted. 

“I just… I think I had gotten used to your… easy acceptance. I realize that I took it for granted.” 

“Dude! Stop! I was definitely in the wrong this time. And I’m sorry.” 

Adrien smiled. “It was just a misunderstanding.” 

“This is how you knew to call me?” 

Adrien nodded.

“I’m so sorry! I never meant to lay into you about… well, you! I just kept thinking about things being off with Alya, and obsessing over how I was supposed to compete with a superhero.”

Snake Noir bumped Nino’s shoulder. “But Nino, you are a superhero, too.” And then his head hung. “And we all have doubts.” 

“Dude, are you okay?” 

“Not really,” he admitted. “The whole reason Ladybug gave me the snake was so that I could confide in her, but I haven’t really done that. I keep using it to talk to you.” 

“Why can’t you talk to Ladybug?” 

“I can! And I can’t. So much of what I want to say is about her and that just makes it awkward. And every time I tell her who I am she starts crying.” 

Nino’s brow furrowed. “She had better not be disappointed!”

Chat shook his head. “No! I don’t think so. I think she’s sad that she has to forget.” 

“Why exactly does she have to forget?” Nino asked. 

“Us knowing each other’s identities apparently led to the end of the world.” It was getting easier to say.  

Nino starred at him flatly. “What. What do you mean, end of the world?” 

Chat threw his hands up in frustration. “I don’t know! I didn’t see it. She did! But apparently, I was akumatized and had the power of unlimited destruction, and blew up not just the earth, but the moon as well!” 

And yeah, maybe it was getting easier to say, but Adrien was still shaking in agitation. 

Nino considered him for several seconds before finding his voice. “Dude. That is… heavy.” 

Snake Noir slumped down on the floor. “You’re telling me.” 

“I’m glad you’ve been able to come here,” Nino finally said. “I cannot imagine going through this alone.”

“I don’t know how I can ever thank you,” Adrien admitted. 

Nino pulled him into a sideways hug. “You don’t have to. That’s what friends are for.” 

“Little did I know, you taking pity on me for having Chloé as my only friend was one of the luckiest days of my life.” 

“Ha! I’m glad you have more options now.” 

Adrien smiled. “So, what do you say? Is this something you want to remember?” 

Nino nodded. “If you want me to know, I want to know.” 

“Even if it puts you in more danger?” 

“Dude! Do you think it’s possible for me to be in more danger at this point?” 

“Nino, I destroyed the world. Not Hawkmoth.” 

Nino frowned. “Now, that’s where you’re wrong. You said you were akumatized. That’s all on Hawkmoth.” 

“I doubt Hawkmoth’s goal was to destroy the world,” Adrien said dryly. 

“Which just means, you must have broken from his control or something.” 

“To destroy the world?” Adrien asked sarcastically. 

Nino placed a hand on either of Adrien’s shoulders. “Dude, look at me.” 

Adrien looked up. 

“I’m not going to lie. Seeing you transformed as Snake whatever with Adrien’s brooding face is majorly trippy.” 

Adrien laughed. “Sass, scales rest. Plagg, claws in.” And in a burst of light, he was just Adrien sitting on his best friend’s bed. 

“You were saying?” Adrien prompted when Nino continued to just stare at him in shock. 

Nino seemed to shake himself loose. “Right! I’m saying this now and I will say it as many times as you need to hear it. You don’t really know what happened in that timeline. Like you said, you didn’t see it. And, you haven’t destroyed the world. Just look outside, you can see it!” 

Adrien opened his mouth to argue, but Nino silenced him with a waggling finger. “No, dude! I know what you’re thinking, but I know you. You would never destroy the world if you were in control of yourself. You are too good. Too pure for this world. And you’re fucking Chat Noir! You literally throw yourself into death’s jaws like every week to protect everyone. I will not let you feel guilty for all of time for something you haven’t even done.” 

Adrien watched Nino through his monologue, unable to help the smile that stretched across his face. “Are you done?” 

“That depends. Are you still beating yourself up?” 

Adrien smirked. “I’m feeling better at the moment actually, but I don’t promise I never will again.”

“Well, you just have to promise to come back whenever you’re feeling that way.” 

Adrien offered an open hand at chest level, and Nino clapped his own hand into it, and they pulled each other into a hug. “Deal, as long as you promise to talk to your girlfriend whenever you’re having doubts.” 

“What? I can’t talk to you about my girlfriend?” 

“I mean, you can! You can talk to me about anything.” 

“Oh my god! You’re Chat Noir!” 

“Uh, yeah?” 

“And I’m Carapace.” 

“Yeah, you gave that away in like my second loop.”

“We can literally talk about anything,” Nino concluded. 

Adrien smiled again. “I guess we can now. I hope you don’t come to regret that.” 

“Dude!” Nino squealed. “This is going to be so cool!” 

…

Chapter Text

For the most part, Adrien stopped using the snake miraculous. Because now that Nino knew, Adrien wanted him to remember whenever Chat Noir came to visit.

They played video games, listened to music, ate junk food, and talked about their experiences as teenaged superheroes.

In short, everything was amazing. Ladybug had been right. He hadn’t realized how much just the secrets had been weighing on him until there was a place where he didn’t have to have them. 

But Adrien couldn’t help but wonder how things might be different now if he had gone to Marinette that night instead of Nino. 

He didn’t regret going to Nino. Nino was a rock. And he didn’t even want to think about a world where Nino didn’t know now. 

But Marinette, she had a way of just making people feel warm, and he wanted to know what her brand of comfort would’ve felt like. And she seemed to finally be relaxing around him, and he liked spending time with her. 

But he had gone to Nino and now he would never know. 

Except he was only too aware that he had access to a power that would let him see exactly how Marinette would react to just about anything he could tell her without any consequences.

But now that he was in a better mental place, he really didn’t want to abuse the privilege of the miraculous. He didn’t want to use it for selfish purposes just to satisfy his curiosity. 

And yet, here he was sitting on her balcony transformed as Snake Noir hoping she was home so he could talk to her. And simultaneously praying she wasn’t so he couldn’t fall to the temptation of risking more secrets. 

“Chat Noir?” 

“Good evening, purrincess,” he greeted with a mischievous smile. “How are you this fine evening?”

She shrugged. “I’m well enough. You look different tonight! Your suit get an upgrade?” she asked with a beaming smile. 

He stood up and did a model spin to give Marinette the full effect, before turning back to her with another pose and then a second that ended with a roguish grin he had perfected under the light of the camera years ago. 

He just wanted her to get a chance to appreciate the suit’s design. 

You know, because she was an aspiring fashion designer, obviously. 

No other reason. 

“Wow!” Her eyes were wide, and currently not on his face, but lost tracing the width of his well defined chest. 

He smirked. “This is Snake Noir’s transformation,” he explained. And then her eyes shot back up to his with pink dusting her cheeks. 

“Snake Noir?” she repeated. “What does that mean?” 

“I’m wearing two miraculouses like you did when you went up against kwamibuster. Well, like a fraction of what you did that day. Have I ever told you that you were positively amazing that day?” 

“A few times, actually,” she said, her cheeks still pink. 

God, this was too much fun.

“So what can I do for you?” she asked.

“Well, I was hoping I could thank you,” he said. 

Her dark eyebrows furrowed. “Thank me? For what?” 

“I can’t really tell you.”

“But then…?” 

“That’s why I’m wearing the snake,” he explained. “I want to thank you for something, but… it won’t make as much sense without me telling you who I am.” 

She hissed in a breath. “You want to tell me who you are?” 

He nodded. “But there’s a catch.” 

“Isn’t there always?” she asked dryly. 

He pointed to the bracelet on his wrist. “This is the snake miraculous. It allows me to redo the same five minutes over and over again. So if you’ll allow it, I can set it, and then explain myself fully without filter so you’ll understand how much I truly appreciate you. But then I will reset it and you won’t remember anything I said.”

“Seems unfair to you,” she commented. 

“Seems unfair to me?” he repeated. “You’re the one who would forget.” 

“If you’re willing to go through so much trouble to say whatever it is you want to say to me, it’s obviously important to you and then you’ll have to go on pretending that that conversation never happened.” 

“But that’s why we’re talking about it now,” he said. “You’ll know we had the conversation. You just won’t know the details. Are you okay with that?” 

“Of course.” She laid a hand on his forearm. “I trust you, kitty.” 

He felt the heat in his own cheeks at her smile that seemed to reach past his eyes and into his core, bringing it warmth and comfort. 

He activated the snake. 

She waited patiently, giving him a soft smile.

And suddenly, his words deserted him, and his nerves caught up to him. This was so silly. After all that build up she was going to think he was ridiculous. 

“Chat? You okay?” 

He offered her a forced smile. “Yes! Totally fine. Just a bit nervous.” 

“Nervous? You? I didn’t think that was possible,” she teased. 

“Yeah, you don’t know me as well as you think.” 

“I actually know you better than you realize.” 

He smiled. She always put him at ease. “Marinette, the reason I wanted to tell you this in this way,” he said, gesturing to his suit, “is because I want to thank you for something you’ve done for me as myself.”

Her smile evaporated, and her eyes widened. “You mean, as the boy under the mask?” 

He nodded. “But why I’m so grateful won’t really make sense without knowing what I’ve been going through as a hero lately.” 

“O-okay,” she stammered. 

“Are you nervous?” he teased. 

She smacked his arm. “Yes, but so are you! You already said so, so no teasing. And quit stalling! We only have five minutes.” 

“For the last few months, Ladybug and I…” he paused and glanced over her railing. “We just… weren’t exactly on the same page about… well, a lot of things.” 

“Why do I get the feeling that’s putting it mildly?” 

He smiled gently. “Because you’re intuitive and kind.” 

“I'm not,” she said, her voice brooking no argument. 

He shook his head. “But that’s what I’m here to tell you. You are one of the kindest people I’ve ever met.” 

He looked away again. “Anyway, I was feeling really isolated and shut out by Ladybug. And…” he shrugged. “I don’t know… unneeded I guess.” 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

He glanced back at her startled at how much her voice shook. One look at her eyes, glassy and trembling, and he realized she was on the verge of tears. 

“Marinette? You okay?”

“Keep going,” she croaked. “Please.” 

“Well, during that time, I was feeling really frustrated and maybe destructive.”

“Destructive?” 

“I smashed a chimney,” he admitted. 

“What?!”

“It was during a sentimonster attack. Miraculous ladybug fixed it,” he quickly explained. 

“But you haven’t… like, hurt yourself?” 

He looked away guiltily. 

“Kitty?”

“I didn’t mean to. And Ladybug was there to stop me.”

Her arms wrapped around him. He leaned into her hold, and his head was on her shoulder. 

“Anyway, what I wanted to say was during that time when things were… not good, you were there filling in the gap. It wasn’t one specific thing or grand gesture. You were just present, making me laugh, making me feel seen, and making me feel like I was… worth knowing.”

“I… I don’t… understand.” 

He looked at her then, let himself fall into her swirling confused cerulean blue eyes. 

“You were there for me as Adrien.”

Her eyes immediately welled with tears. And her arms tightened around him, and she buried her head in the crook of his neck. Her whole body shook in silent quaking sobs.

He squeezed her back. “Marinette? I was trying to say thank you,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to upset you.” 

She shook her head rapidly. “You- you haven’t upset me,” she choked out. 

“Then why are you crying?” 

“I upset myself!” she yelled into his shoulder. 

“Why?” 

She pulled back, her furious crying eyes meeting his own unflinchingly. “Because I didn’t know that anything was wrong! I’m your pa- uh... friend, A-Adrien. I didn’t see it! I didn't know that you were hurting! I should have seen it! I should have talked to you. I should have done something!” 

He smiled softly, and cradled the side of her face in his gloved hand, careful not to hurt with his claws. “You didn’t need to see it in order to be there for me. That’s what I’m saying. And I just wanted to thank you for that.”

“I’m glad that I was able to be there for you when even Ladybug wasn’t,” she said, the anger and bitterness still clear in her voice. 

“Please don’t be mad at Ladybug,” he said. 

She pulled completely out of his arms then, her eyes glaring ice daggers. “Why not? She’s the one that cut you out, right? Made you feel… useless and isolated? Did she notice you were hurting?” 

He captured both of her hands. 

“Marinette, Ladybug has been struggling for a while now. She wasn’t in a position to notice. I’ve tried to be there for her as much as I can, and I’ve had a lot of practice pretending to be okay even when I’m not.” 

She turned to him again, her chin suddenly trembling. “You have, haven’t you?” she cried and then looked up at him again, not bothering to wipe away the tears tracking down her face. “Adrien, this isn’t fair. You deserve better. Better from your friends. Better from your partner. Better from your father.” 

His miraculous beeped. They both glanced at it.

“Please tell me that you have a confidant! A real one! Not just five minute time loops where no one except you can remember?”

“I do, now. I promise.” 

“Nino?” she guessed. 

“Nino,” he confirmed. 

She nodded. “Good.” 

“Marinette, I would tell you. I would let you remember. I trust you that much… but…”

His miraculous was beeping rapidly now. 

She smiled and then she kissed his nose. “It’s okay, kitty. The more people that know the more dangerous it is. I get it.”

He hugged her one more time. “I don’t deserve you,” he whispered. 

She pulled back just enough to hold both sides of his face in her hand. “You’re wrong. You deserve this and so much more.” 

He reached for the bracelet, that was almost a one sustained tone at this point, but he hesitated. “I want you to remember,” he told her. 

She smiled softly, and pressed her forehead to his. “I know,” she whispered. Her hand was on his. She squeezed it once, and then she was the one that flicked the switch on the snake miraculous. 

Because she was stronger than him. 

And the world dissolved, and she was sitting across from him again with her patient smile. 

He immediately burst into tears. 

Her smile dissolved immediately. “Kitty! What’s wrong? What happened? Did the conversation go that badly?” 

He beamed up at her through his tears, and shook his head. “No, Marinette,” he said when he could finally speak again. “It went beautifully well. I… I didn’t want you to forget.” 

She smiled. “I’m glad it went well. Maybe you’ll be able to tell me about it someday?” 

He nodded. “I hope so. In the meantime, please know that I feel really lucky to have met you and to have you in my life.”

Her smile grew even wider. “Right back atcha, kitty.” 

“I can’t stay,” he said. It was a lie. No one would notice that he was gone for another hour, but he wasn’t going to keep it together. 

She nodded. “I understand.” And the way that her eyes glistened just a little too bright. He suspected that she truly did. 

“You always do,” he said. He pulled her hand to his face, and deposited a slow kiss on her knuckle. “See you around, Princess.” 

…

Chapter Text

“You okay, dude?” Nino asked. They were sitting on his bed, watching an anime, but Adrien had no idea what was happening in the current episode. 

Adrien’s head shot up from where his cheek had been pressed into his propped up knee.

“Yeah, of course,” Adrien said. “Why wouldn’t I be?” 

Nino frowned, and paused the show. “You’ve just been quiet tonight. 

“I’m just tired,” Adrien said, which was mostly true. “The photo shoot this morning went seven ways to hell after it was disrupted by that akuma.” 

“That akuma sucked!” Nino said.

Adrien nodded in agreement. It had taken Ladybug, Chat Noir, and five temp heroes (Carapace included) hours to deal with. “And once it was cleared up, father insisted the shoot continue even though we had already lost our lighting. Then afterwards, he lectured me for an hour about not being professional enough because none of the shots came out to his satisfaction.”

Adrien trailed off, noticing that Nino had his lips pressed tightly closed. 

“It’s not that big of a deal,” Adrien said. 

Which had been the wrong thing to say. Adrien knew it as soon as the words left his mouth. 

“Not that big a deal?!” Nino repeated. “Dude, he runs you ragged, doesn’t let you have any fun, puts you in situations where it is literally impossible to succeed, and then he yells at you when you fail.”

“He doesn’t yell,” Adrien defended.

“I don’t know why you defend him!”

Adrien shrugged. “He’s my father.” 

“Is he? Seems more like he’s your boss.” 

Adrien sagged on the floor, and Nino wilted a second later. 

“I’m sorry, dude. I don’t mean to make you feel worse. He just… makes me so angry!”

Adrien smiled then. “It feels good to have you on my side.” 

“How would you feel about me borrowing the Snake?” Nino asked casually. 

Adrien started, sitting up straight. “What?!” 

“I mean, I just want to punch him in the face. Just once, dude, I swear. But I’d prefer not to get thrown in jail with my future career destroyed because your old man is vengeful.” 

Adrien burst out laughing. “I’d pay to see it actually.” 

Nino smiled and bumped his shoulder into Adrien’s. Adrien’s laughter died down, but his smile remained. 

But Nino looked solemn. Adrien frowned and leaned forward. “Are you okay?”

Nino smiled. “Yeah, I was just thinking. Have you ever thought about using the Snake to confront your father?”

“No,” Adrien admitted. “I am trying not to use it for selfish reasons.”

Nino rolled his eyes.

“What would I even say to him?” Adrien cleared his throat. “Hello Father! I bend over backwards to meet your expectations, but they’re impossible to reach. I want you to show me the same respect you expect me to show you.” Adrien shook his head. “What would be the point? He won’t remember, so nothing will change.”

Nino stared at a Jagged Stone poster across the room. “I just… wonder sometimes if he even knows how much he’s hurt you. Confronting him might tell you that.” 

Adrien was silent for a long time. 

“Dri?” 

Adrien looked up at Nino’s concerned gaze, and then turned away again. “I just…” Adrien said. “What if the answer is he does know? And… doesn’t care?”

Nino wrapped him in a hug, and Adrien let his cheek fall onto Nino’s shoulder. 

It had been easy to visit Nino and Marinette with the Snake Miraculous. Adrien knew that they cared about him. In fact, he had known they had cared about him on both sides of his mask. If anything, he had underestimated how much affection and love they held for him. So he hadn’t been afraid of anything that might come out in a conversation with them that they couldn’t remember. He knew he’d still hold them in the highest regard. 

But with his father, if he learned something he didn’t like - that his father didn’t care about him, rather than was just abrasive and uncomfortable with feelings and affection - Adrien didn’t know if he would be able to keep up the song and dance routine required to keep his father happy. Adrien wanted to keep what little freedoms he had managed to squirrel away. He couldn’t stand it if they were taken away. He was terrified he wouldn’t survive it.

On some days, he knew he was too close to not wanting to survive it. 

It was too easy to throw himself in front of an akuma’s blast, too easy to picture his own bubbling cataclysm floating towards his chest without concern.

But things had gotten better, were continuing to get better. Thanks to Nino mostly, and to Ladybug, too. 

“Have you ever used the snake with anyone besides me?” Nino asked, interrupting Adrien’s thoughts.

Adrien didn’t want to mention Marinette. He knew Marinette wouldn’t have minded, and Nino would have listened without judgement. But it felt weird to tell Nino something about Marinette that she herself didn’t remember.

“Ladybug picked me to use the snake against Desperada,” he confided instead.  

“You’re Viperion, too?!”

Adrien winced. “No, I was Aspik, but… it didn’t go well, and I eventually gave it up, and she selected someone else to be the snake. That person is Viperion.” 

Nino looked at him suspiciously. “How long did you stay in the loop before you gave up?” 

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck. “Umm… like three months?” 

Nino bolted to his feet. “Months?! Dude! You need to stop torturing yourself!” 

“I just… wanted to impress her as myself. She’s already said no to Chat Noir. I was hoping… that being Adrien was a…” 

“Second chance?” Nino filled in sarcastically. 

Adrien grinned. “Exactly! But… she needed a temp hero in the first place because the two of us weren’t enough. So… I had to give it back, and tell her to find someone else. I feared that Adrien was only a disappointment to her.” 

“You tried for months! What more could she ask of you than that?” Nino pursed his lips. “Like how many loops is that?”

“25,912.” 

Nino’s eyes widened, and he just stared at him until Adrien had to look away. 

“Didn’t you lose count?” 

Adrien shook his head. “The snake doesn’t let you forget the number. You know every time what loop you’re on.”

Nino was really solemn after that. “I think that power is the scariest of them all,” he said quietly. 

“Scarier than the power of destruction?” Adrien teased, trying to lighten the mood again. 

“Yes,” Nino said seriously, not taking the hint.

Adrien sighed. “What was the hardest akuma for you as Carapace?” 

“As Carapace?! I was fighting Anansi as Nino while you were caught in some spider web! That was terrifying.” 

“You were a natural with the baton,” Adrien said. 

Nino ducked his head down - trying to hide a blush.

“I was really threatened by it at the time,” Adrien admitted. 

Nino’s gaze snapped back up. “Threatened?! By me?”

“I… It felt like Ladybug was trying to replace me.” 

Nino shook his head. “She was trying to save you, dude!”

“It kinda feels like she’s trying to replace me now, too.” 

Nino frowned. “What do you mean?” 

“She told someone else her identity. And yeah, she explained why she couldn’t tell me so it’s easier to accept now. But Nino, I’ve been sidelined so many times recently. Rena Rouge removed me from the battlefield when Style Queen attacked. I was so far away that by the time I got back…” he trailed off, his brain spiraling rapidly.

“Dude?” 

“Rena Rouge told me not to interfere with SentiBubbler, too.”

“I’m sure she didn’t mean to push you aside like that. Alya loves you both as heroes. You should hear her fangirl about working with both of you.” 

But Adrien wasn’t hearing Nino anymore. Rena Rouge knew a lot - more than any of the other temp heroes. She had made plans with Ladybug before Ladybug had even shown up. 

Rena Rouge was the one that knew Ladybug’s identity. 

But Rena Rouge was Alya.

Ladybug had said she told her best friend in her civilian life.

That meant… 

Adrien couldn’t breathe. 

“Adrien? What’s wrong?” Nino asked, urgently.

But Adrien couldn’t answer. All he felt was horror and dread writhing sickenly in his gut. This was knowledge he wasn’t supposed to know. 

He was the one person that wasn’t supposed to know.

But it fit and he couldn’t unknow it. Marinette had… she had burst into tears upon learning his identity just like Ladybug. She had ranted and railed in anger that Ladybug hadn’t realized how hurt her partner had been by her actions. She hadn’t been angry with Ladybug - she had been angry with herself. And then, she had erased her own memory when he had hesitated because they weren’t supposed to know. 

He was going to throw up. 

“Dude! Talk to me!” Nino begged, tapping either one of Adrien’s cheeks.

Adrien turned toward his friend, but his eyes looked past him, remaining unfocused. 

“Plagg! Sass! Help!” Nino called.

The kwamis flew into his line of sight, and conversed together briefly. Adrien heard none of it.  

His body was trembling - shaking so hard it was amazing he hadn’t fallen off the edge of Nino’s bed. Though that might have had to do with the hand clamped painfully onto his shoulder bracing him from tipping over. Hot tears fell from his cheeks and his chest burned. He clawed for air that refused to come.

“Kid,” Plagg called. “Slow down. You’re okay. Nothing’s happened yet.”

“I-I’m n-n-not supposed t-t-to know,” Adrien managed to get out between the body quakes. He had always wanted to know. And Marinette, she was amazing! She always had been. He wanted to be ecstatic at the revelation. “I don’t w-w-w-want to destroy the world.”

Ladybug had said the moon was in pieces.

“And if you get akumatized right now over it, it will be a self fulfilling prophecy!” Plagg snapped. “Now breathe properly already!” 

“Dude!” Nino chastised. “That’s not how you calm someone down during a panic attack.”

“I’d like to see you do better,” Plagg challenged.

But Nino was already ignoring the kwami. “Dri, breathe in with me.” And then he slowly and dramatically breathed in. 

Adrien tried to follow suit. Really, he did. He took in a slow deep breath, but then his throat would lodge close again, and he’d start gasping again. His chest spasmed painfully. 

“Can you reset the last five minutes?” Nino asked Sass. 

The kwami shook his head. “It’s very dangerous for me to use my power without a holder to limit them. It's not worth the cost,” Sass informed. “He already knew everything needed to put it together. He just hadn’t thought about it. We can reset… maybe… without destroying the timeline completely, but he’ll just figure it out again probably within a few days. Plagg and I knew it was only a matter of time.”

“Some warning would have been nice!” Adrien shrieked, his anger cutting through the shaking, but only for a second. 

“Look kid, we don’t know that this is the end of the world. And honestly, it probably isn’t!” 

Adrien’s green eyes locked onto the floating kwami. “What do you mean?” 

Plagg turned to Sass. “You explain it.” 

“My power works differently than Fluff’sss, but from my understanding, the end of the world probably had very little to do with you knowing each other's identities. It was more likely that it was an event that was easy to change to prevent a certain series of events. It wasn’t necessarily that you couldn’t know one another. Just that you couldn't know that day.”

“Why didn’t you say any of this before?” Adrien gasped out. He was still struggling to keep his breathing slow. 

Sass shrugged. “Because we don’t know for certain what happened, and anything short of a guarantee wouldn’t have been enough for Ladybug.” 

“Look!” Plagg interjected. “If things truly go to absolute hell and back, Fluff’s holder will most likely show up to fix things again, and since she’s not already here, we’re likely fine.”

The tension in Adrien’s chest broke, and the rest of his body slumped. Luckily, Nino was there to catch him. Adrien clung to his shoulder even as he tried to face the kwamis. As always, Nino was a rock. If he was phased at all, Nino wasn’t showing it. 

Adrien was dripping with sweat, his blond hair was plastered to the sides of his face. He could breathe now, and breathe heavily he did, still leaning heavily on Nino. 

“So, what do we do?” Adrien asked.

Plagg shrugged. “Use the snake to tell Ladybug you figured her out. Then come up with a plan together. She’s a crafty one. She’ll have ideas.”

Sass nodded. “Most likely, she will know more than she’s told you, Chat Noir. She may have a better idea of what needs to be avoided.”

Adrien nodded. “Okay, okay. We can do this.” He turned to Nino. “Help me stand?”

Nino held out his arms, and Adrien hauled himself to his feet with Nino’s support. 

“I’m sorry to cut our illicit slumber party short,” Adrien said. 

Nino shook his head. “No worries, dude. Fate of the world stuff obviously should come first. But… umm… are you going to be okay running over rooftops? No offense, but… you look like shit.” 

“Plagg, claws out,” Adrien called. As the transformation washed over him, Adrien could stand up straight, breathe easier. He sighed in relief. “With the transformation, I’m okay.”

“Can you let me know when you get somewhere safe and outside a time loop, dude?” 

Adrien smiled. “Yeah, sure.” Adrien pulled his baton from his back. “And Nino?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you for being here. Thank you for not asking questions.”

Nino smiled. “Of course, dude. Anytime.” 

… 

Marinette wasn’t on her balcony, but her light was on. He couldn’t handle waiting so he sent Sass through the window. She was up on the roof less than a minute later. 

“Chaton? What’s wrong?” 

He transformed with the snake and activated second chance immediately, and then fell heavily onto the only chair on her balcony.

“You shouldn’t have let me keep the snake,” he began without preamble. 

“What are you talking about?” she demanded, but her eyes were wide. 

“We don’t have time for you to try to misdirect me. It’s too late, m’lady.” 

She wilted. “How? Did you try to figure it out?”

He shook his head. “No. I just…” His fingers tried to tear through his hair, only to find the suit draped over his skull. “You told me to tell someone. So I did. I told my best friend. Only he turned out to be a temp hero. He slipped. He thought I knew who he was when Chat Noir showed up in his room. It’s not his fault.” 

“Breathe, kitty.” 

He took in a shuddering breath, but he was still shaky. The panic was starting to grip him again, and he was trying to keep it from exploding, but he knew he was slowly losing the battle. 

She crouched down in front of him and held his hands. 

And he barreled forward in the story. “Then because I knew his identity, I later realized who Rena Rouge was. And I know that you never told me that she was the one that you revealed your identity to, but… she just… knows too much. And I know who Alya’s best friend is. I swear I never meant to figure it out!”

And he couldn’t breathe. “I can’t… m’lady, please. I’m so scared.” He broke off as the sobs overtook him again. 

She held him, stroked his head and neck with calming hands, and whispered nonsensical soothing sounds into his ears. He leaned into her comfort, into her warmth, fighting to collect himself. He needed to get enough out so she could tell him what to do. How to fix this. Because he didn’t want to be akumatized and he didn't want the world to end. Especially not by his hand.

“Tell me what to do,” he sobbed.

“Who’s your best friend?” she asked. 

“Nino.” 

He felt her sharp intake of breath.

“Please don’t start crying,” he begged. “You always cry when I tell you.”

“It’s too late, Adrien,” she whispered. And when he looked up her eyes were already filled with tears.

“Please tell me you have an idea,” he begged. 

She took up his hands and squeezed them tight as she kneeled in front of him again. “You’re not going to like it.” 

He snorted through his tears. “That’s a given.”

“You’re going to go back and you’re going to pretend you don’t know.”

He sucked in another breath and he closed his eyes against her words. “How do you expect me to do that?”

“You’re clearly a very good actor,” she said gently.

And he crumpled in on himself at her words. His head fell into their joined hands as his body shook in an emotional earthquake.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, continuing to stroke his head. “I wish it was different. I wish I wasn’t placing this burden solely on you. That I wasn’t asking you to put on mask after mask. You shouldn’t have to.” 

“I just… why, do you need me to pretend? How does that help us?” 

“Nothing can change between Ladybug and Chat Noir.”

He felt himself nod though he wasn’t sure if he could ever pull that off. He felt like his whole world had been thrown out of orbit.

“And nothing can change between Adrien and his very good friend, Marinette. You understand?” 

And suddenly, he did.

“We can’t date,” he concluded.

She nodded. “We can’t date. Knowing who you are… it’s clear to me that it wasn’t the reveal that was the problem. It was that our reveal led to us dating.” 

“Wh-What? What does that have to do with anything?” he asked.

“We can’t date. You have to pretend like you don’t know. Can you do that for me, kitty? Can you wait until Hawkmoth has been defeated?”

“I uh… wait?” 

“I love you,” she confessed. 

And he stared at her in shock. She loved him? 

“And you love me. But our love… it destroys the world.” 

Her words hit him like a never ending monsoon. He felt thrown about, twisted up, and torn into pieces all at once.

“What?” he hissed.

“That’s what Chat Blanc told me. I didn’t know you were Adrien. Adrien was the person who learned my identity that day, but it was Chat Noir who knew. And Chat Blanc… he said it was our love.” 

He shook his head even as he cried. “No, no, Mari, I refuse to believe it.” 

“I still have nightmares of that time. Of you alone, and half insane.” Her hands cradled either side of his face. 

He kissed the palm of one of her hands. 

“Mari, please,” he begged. “Don’t make me pretend with you.” 

She kissed him. Hard. He felt dizzy. 

She pulled away and smiled. “Figure I owe you a kiss that you will remember.” 

Then the world blurred around him. God damn her! This was how she knew how the snake worked in the first place, knew how to activate it when she had him distracted. She was the fucking Guardian. 

He was standing again. He collapsed into the chair again and just continued to cry.

“Chaton? What the hell happened? Why are you always crying on the other side of one of your loops? How awful am I to you?”

His arms snaked around her midriff, and he pulled her against him. And just sobbed into her stomach.

“You’re not awful, Mari. You’re amazing.” 

And he loved her. 

Her fingers ran over his head and cat ears, causing them to flick back and forth.

He spent the whole loop crying, and the next one after that. But he recovered faster than he did with Nino that first night with the snake. It only took four loops before he got ahold of himself. Maybe he was getting better at coping with world-ending fear and grief. Or maybe it’s because his lady was just a little bit more soothing to him, as awesome as his best friend was. 

Now, he just felt numb.

And exhausted. 

“How many loops have you been through?” she asked softly.

“Five” 

“What can I do?” she asked.

“M’lady, you’re already doing it.” 

She stiffened at the endearment. He holds her to him harder. “I know have to pretend that nothing has changed. I have to wear a mask around you all the time. Every moment of every day as Chat Noir and every day as Adrien, and I know that I’ll get really good at it. It’s something I’ve done a million times before. But let me have an extra loop or two okay?” 

He can feel her shaking as suddenly she’s crying too.

“I just… I’m scared,” he confessed. “I don’t know how long we’ll have to do this. I don’t know if I’ll remember how to take the walls down when it’s over. Will I even know who I am?” He squeezed her tighter. “And… I don’t know if you’ll wait for me without knowing,” he whispered.

She was caressing the sides of his face in gentle soothing strokes. Tears streamed from her eyes. 

“You’re so amazing!” she told him. “So resilient, and so much stronger than me.”

He barked a broken laugh that held no humor. “You’re wrong. I’m so broken. I’ve been so tempted so many times to just break the loop and let you remember.” 

“But you haven’t.” 

“You’re usually the one that resets it once everything comes out.” 

She kneels down at eye level with him. “You’re my strength, Chaton. My ability to reset the loop is to keep you safe. And no one else. I love you so much.” 

“I love you, too, m’lady.” 

She moved forward to kiss him and he pulled back. She frowned. 

“Please don’t,” he begged. 

“Why not?” 

“Because there’s already too many kisses that we can’t remember. I want us both to remember them.”

“Chaton, if you feel that way strongly, I can respect it. But if you’re afraid of forgetting what it feels like to be yourself, I want you to feel it, to remember it every single day. You should always know what it means to not have to wear masks. What it means to be loved.” 

“Every single day?” he repeated. 

She nodded firmly. “Every single day.”

“What about not abusing the miraculous?” 

“Abuse it,” she said. “I don’t care. You’re more important.”

He was speechless. 

So when she leaned in again, he let his eyes fall closed. Let her press her lips gently against his own. His whole body melted into the contact like butter. He kissed her like it was the first time and like it was the last time, because in a way… it was. 

They stayed together - sharing their life’s breath, letting their mouths and tongues dance together in sync the way Ladybug and Chat Noir always were. They didn’t stop. Eventually, the world blurred, and he realized she had reset the time loop herself again.

But this time he was smiling when he found himself standing on her balcony once again peering into her concerned blue eyes. 

This time he felt lighter and freer. She loved him. And he loved her.

And they would be together someday. 

He had to believe that.

...

Chapter Text

If Adrien had avoided using the snake before, he now was operating on the other extreme. Ladybug had told him to abuse it, and he’s not sure she would have meant it quite so literally, but well… he and Nino had come up with a list. 

It had started with his homework. If he could finish his homework in far less time, he’d have more time to visit Nino and Marinette. Not that it took a lot of time to visit Marinette as it was usually in a loop, so even if he spent hours with her, it never took longer than ten minutes as far as the rest of the world was concerned. 

He unfortunately couldn’t do all of his homework in a time loop because that would leave whatever he had completed in the last five minutes erased. But he could do all the reading, researching, planning, and studying in a loop. Anything that didn’t require him to write anything down. 

Nathalie had only walked on him transformed once. 

“Yes, Nathalie?” he had asked without looking up from his textbook. He hadn’t even thought about it. 

She stood stock still and was dead silent. He glanced towards her with a frown - her eyes were comically wide, but that was the only sign that she was shocked. He glanced down, and remembered he was transformed at Aspik. 

“Oh shit!” 

But it had been easy enough to fix. He just reset, destranformed, waited for Nathalie to come in and deliver his schedule changes for the week and leave, and then he transformed again. 

And then Nino had realized if he could pack all of his studying into the space of five minutes, Adrien could surely squeeze in some well deserved leisure time as well. 

It only took 71 loops to read a hundred thousand words, and Adrien had long ago discovered the joys of fanfiction, but he had never really had time to read more than a bit here or there. Now? With unlimited time and an entire endless library of things to read based on his favorite games and anime? Let’s just say his current power set brought a whole new meaning to the phrase, “Just One More Chapter.” 

And a season of anime was only 119 loops. Hell, he had gotten through all 981 episodes of One Piece in 4532 loops, which was still nothing compared to his time as Aspik, and honestly, far less traumatizing. 

He had felt slightly guilty about it. He was literally using the powers of time travel to watch anime. 

But when he mentioned it to Nino, his friend had just rolled his eyes. “Dude! You’re thinking about this all wrong. You’re a hero and we need you to be okay. This is about avoiding burnout as much as it is about having a good time. It’s so you get enough of a break and enough sleep to be the competent hero that we all need!”

But eventually the stories and shows hadn’t been enough to hold his attention. And he took another of Nino’s ideas and started paying visits to several of his friends. 

He had gone to Kagami first. He had no expectations of healing things with her, but he had always wanted to be able to explain so that his apologies might mean something.

“Chat Noir? Is there an akuma?” she asked by way of greeting. 

He rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Ah, no. I wanted to talk to you about something, but I also have to erase your memory after the fact to protect identities. Are you okay with that?”

Her eyebrows rose in surprise. “You have piqued my curiosity. You may proceed.” 

He nodded. He had already activated his power before he had landed in her bedroom that was definitely as lavish as his own if not quite as spacious. 

“So… more than anything I wanted to apologize to you?”

She frowned. “I’m unaware of anything that you have done that would require an apology.”

“Kagami, I’m Adrien.”

Her eyes went wide for a second. “Ah, I see.” Then, she nodded. 

“That’s it?” 

“No, it makes a lot of sense.” And then she did something he never would have expected. She smiled. And most of his tension released. 

“I just wanted to explain now that I had the ability to. That I wasn’t ever lying to you or running from our dates because I wanted to.” 

“You had to sacrifice your own desires for a higher calling.”

“Yeah, that’s it exactly.”

She smiled at him again. “I appreciate you coming to explain and I understand completely why I can’t remember. May I ask you a question?” 

“Of course!” 

“Were you never in love with Marinette?”

“Well, I… uh… it was hard to see Marinette when I was completely enamored with Ladybug, but…”

She shook her head. “Are you in love with both of them now?” 

“I mean, sort've?” He knew Kagami hated when he ended every sentence as if it was a question. “They’re the same person.”

Kagami sighed. “How disappointing.” 

“Disappointing?! She’s amazing!” 

“I know, but if she’s Ladybug and you’re Chat Noir, I never had a chance with either of you.” 

He felt like he had been thrown off a cliff. “What? You had feelings for Marinette?” 

She grinned. “Well, she is amazing, as you always say. At least I know that I have really good taste.”

“Well, I’m sorry to have ruined all your prospects.” 

“I will survive. Neither of you define me as a person.” 

“You’re pretty amazing, too, you know,” he told her sincerely. 

She nodded. “You honor me.” 

He laughed. “Kagami, please don’t get all formal on me. I’m still just me.” 

“Well, I hope you know that I appreciate all that you and Ladybug do for the city,” Kagami told him, ignoring his request.

“Thank you, Kagami. That means a lot coming from you.” 

She nodded in acknowledgment and he knew he was being dismissed, and then he slid the switch on his bracelet and he was on the roof of her family’s manor once again, his heart a little lighter.

He had gone to Alya after that. He had been nervous since she was the one who tended to push him aside as Chat Noir. But his fears proved to be completely unfounded as for the most part she could never stop laughing whenever he revealed himself.

“Wait! You’re Adrien?!”

She had burst into cackles immediately. 

“Why is that so funny?!” he demanded the first time. 

She just grinned, shaking her head and still chuckling. “I wish I could explain it to you, sunshine.” 

“I already know Marinette is Ladybug,” he said.

“Oh good! Then I don’t have to be panicked about accidentally slipping!” And she went back to rolling on the floor laughing. 

“You wouldn’t happen to already know Marinette’s other secret would you?” she asked.

His eyebrows scrunched together under his mask. “Umm… that she’s in love with me as Adrien?” 

Her face lit up. “Oh see!! You do get it!” 

He shook his head. “I do not get it.” 

“The two of you managed to get yourself in a love square. You’ve been chasing each other around like two cute little hamsters in hamster balls.” 

He sighed, far less amused than Alya at the current state of his Marinette’s relationship. “I’m really glad someone is getting some joy out of this.” 

“Hey!” she objected. “I’m only going to know this for another three minutes! Let me have my fun!”

He held up his hands in surrender, and he was smiling in spite of himself. Maybe some time in the future, after he and Marinette could be together, it would be funny to him, too.

“God! This is why it feels like I’m third-wheeling during akuma fights,” she exclaimed.

“You feel like a third wheel?!” he repeated in disbelief. “Have you seen the chaotic energy that is you and Marinette coming up with a plan together? I am definitely the third wheel in that situation.”

And then she was cackling again. “I’m sorry,” she wheezed. “Nino says I can be a bit of a bulldozer when I’m trying to find a solution to something.” 

“That’s putting it mildly,” he said dryly.

All the mirth fled her face and she looked at him in concern. “Hey, you okay?”

He nodded. “It’s not like I’m allowed to be anything else.” 

“No, don’t say that! You’re allowed to be upset with me! I deserve it sometimes.”

He shook his head. “I’m never going to hold your ability to defeat an akuma against you. I just… have felt a little unneeded lately,” he admitted.

She stared at him for a second and then she burst into laughter again. 

And despite still not getting it, he found himself chuckling, too. Her laughter was just that infectious. “Why do you find this so funny?” he asked. 

“Because you’re a literal superhero and a model with more money than god with a heart of absolute gold. You work with her as Ladybug so well I have to deal with crazy conspiracy theorists on the Ladyblog who think the two of you must be telepathic aliens!” 

“What? People don’t think that.” 

“They do! And it’s annoying. But my point is you’re the real deal, Agreste, and she’s crazy about you, and you know it, and yet you still manage to doubt yourself.” 

“I’m glad my struggles and hang ups are so amusing to you,” he said with a pout. 

She sat up and fist bumped his shoulder. “Aww! Sunshine! I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant, your insecurity makes you seem sweeter and cuter. And it makes you more human. I don’t mean to mock you in any way.”

He searched her face and only found open sincerity.

“Thanks, Alya.” 

“So, does she know that you know?” 

“I mean, she doesn’t right now. But I’ve told her. Many many times, but it was just like this and she doesn’t remember.” 

She softened. “That sounds difficult.” 

“It’s apparently better than the alternative,” he said, going for nonchalance, but he didn’t fool her if her scooching to sit right next to him was anything to go by.  

“I wish we could all fix it for you, Adrien.” 

“Yeah, me too.” 

“How are you?” 

He shrugged. “I’m okay at the moment. Some days are worse than others. Nino… Nino has been a godsend.” 

She smiled. “He is pretty amazing. He knows outside of a loop?” 

“He does.” 

“I’m glad you have that, Adrien. Marinette was falling apart at the seams before she told me.” 

“Does he know about Marinette?” Adrien asked. Sometimes, it seemed like Nino knew more than he was letting on. But maybe his friend was just really respectful of secrets and didn’t ask questions.

“Not from me! And he hasn’t told me about you being Chat Noir either.” 

Adrien glanced toward the window. 

“Does it bother you that there are secrets between the two of you?” he finally asked.

“No, not these ones. They’re not our secrets. They’re yours, and they’re Marinette’s, so they’re not ours to share.”

“I'm jealous,” he admitted.

She offered him a sympathetic smile. “Someday, you won’t have to be anymore.”

The Snake beeped its first warning. “Time’s just about up.”

She offered him a fist bump and then a hug. He reciprocated both. “I’m glad you stopped by, Sunshine. You’re always welcome any time you think my particular brand of company is something that would help you.” 

He grinned. “Thank you, Alya.” 

“I look forward to the day when all four of us can just be open about everything,” she said. 

He snorted. “You and me both.” 

His went to his bodyguard next. 

“I just wanted to apologize to you for always running off. I don’t mean to make your job harder or get you into trouble. I am literally running away to save the city.”

His bodyguard didn’t say anything. He never said anything. He had just let out a resigned sigh and then patted Adrien’s shoulder. 

Adrien took that as forgiveness and reset the loop. There was no sense in sitting there in awkward silence for another four and a half minutes. 

When he had told Nathalie one afternoon at her desk outside her office, she looked horrified - frozen as still as a statue trapped in Medusa’s gaze. 

“Nathalie?” 

“I… all this time?” she whispered.

“Yeah. I know it’s a lot. I know it causes you a bit of grief when I disappear.” 

She waved away his concern. “Right now, we’re in some kind of time loop and I won’t remember?”

He nodded.

“But you will,” she said. It wasn’t a question.

“Yes,” he confirmed anyway. 

“Adrien, I need you to listen to me.”

“Okay.” 

“I can never find out. Your father can’t either. If you need something because you’re hurt or cornered, or…” she trailed off.

Was she crying? 

She cleared her throat. 

“Go to your friends. Their parents. Just… not your father, okay? Or me, because I’d have to inform him.”

His brows furrowed together in confusion. “Okay?” It wasn’t hard to agree despite how weird she was being. He knew Paris needed him and he also knew that his father would never let him continue. Especially if he was seeking help due to an injury or something.

That’s what Nathalie was referring to, right? 

She patted him on the shoulder. It was even more awkward than when his bodyguard had done it. 

“Adrien, you’re quite impressive as a hero.” 

“Thank you,” he said with a smile.

And then there was Marinette. He had learned that it was impossible to tell her he was Adrien without making her cry, which was frustrating because she was also so much more open and affectionate once she knew. 

“How do I get you to not breakdown when I tell you this?” he asked her seriously.

She laughed through her tears. “I’m sorry, kitty. I have no idea. It’s just… it’s not fair.” 

He smiled. “That’s what Ladybug always says,” he told her casually. She didn’t know that he knew this go around.

“She’s right! You deserve so much, and life… it’s not fair!”

He turned to her seriously. “I don’t need life to be fair, Mari. I just… don’t want to have to wear a mask all the time.” And then he smiled. “I’m glad that you’re okay with me doing this.” 

She nodded tearfully. “Anytime, Kitty. Anytime.”  

Then during a regular patrol at one point he realized he just wanted to make her laugh. So he spent another few hundred loops figuring out which jokes made her laugh the hardest and which ones were absolute duds. Then, on a day when she was having a hard time, he showed up on her balcony and gave her the best one hour comedy of her life. 

Her unrestrained laughter was so explosive she had literally fallen out of her chair. Totally worth it. 

“Thank you, kitty,” she said wiping the tears induced by her laughter. “You have no idea how much I needed this.” 

He hadn’t argued. “Of course, princess. I am always at your service!”

Then, he started working on the perfect confession. He was trying to see if he could get her to kiss him as Chat Noir without revealing his identity because, you know, that always made her cry. 

“Can I use the snake to ask you a very important question?” he had asked Ladybug on patrol. 

She nodded. He activated the time loop a second later. 

“What do you think it would take to get you to kiss me?” 

She laughed. “Are you serious right now? That is your very important question?” 

“It is,” he nodded, but offered her a huge grin so she could take it as a joke if she wanted.

“Why? You haven’t been able to be successful yet?” she teased.

“Oh no! I’ve been super successful. All I really have to do is tell you my name.”

She scoffed.

“No, I’m serious!” he boasted with a huge grin splitting his face knowing she only half believed him.

“So, why don’t you just do that?” she asked seriously. 

“Because you always cry! And I don’t want to kiss away your tears. I want to make you smile.” 

She got quiet. “You know, we can’t be together right?” 

“Yeah Marinette,” he whispered. “I know that really well.”

It was silent.

“How long have you known?” she asked softly.

He had no idea how to answer that question. Because time was now very weird for him. In one sense he had only known for a few weeks, on the other he had literally spent so much time in loops that it had to have been at least twice that at this point. Maybe more.

“A while,” he said. “But we’ve already talked about that to death. I’d much rather figure out how to get you to fall desperately in love with this half of me.” 

She raised her eyebrows. “You want me to fall desperately in love with you in five minutes?” 

He shrugged. “We have a solid foundation of trust and friendship. I’m not starting from nothing. Plus, I’ve fallen in love in less than five minutes before.” With her. He didn’t think he needed to say that though.  

She actually smiled. “Yeah, I’ve fallen in love pretty fast before, too.” 

And it occurred to him that he had no idea what had made her fall in love with Adrien. He probably could ask her, but that was one more memory that he wanted her to remember having told him. 

He could probably just show up on her balcony as regular old Chat Noir and just say something like, “So, Adrien Agreste, huh?” She’d probably tell him, and she’d even remember it. But she wouldn’t know that it was him she was telling. 

How the hell had his life gotten so complicated? 

“There’s no way I would start crying just from knowing your name though,” she said. “You have to be making that up.”

He just turned to her and raised his eyebrows. 

The expression probably didn’t work as well with his transformation covering them. 

But she still hesitated. “There’s no way!” she exclaimed, but then she got a thoughtful look in her eyes. “Unless…” 

And then her eyes started welling with tears.

He almost laughed, but he managed to hold it back.

“Oh, come here, bug,” he said instead, grabbing her by the waist and pulling her to him. He just held her as she shook silently. 

“It’s not fair,” she whispered. 

“I know,” he said, and then kissed the top of her head. “I know.”

“Do you see my problem now?” he said after another pause. 

She laughed through her tears, which had been his intention, and he smiled.

She pulled away slightly. “I’ve thought about it before, you know.”

“Thought about what?”

“Letting myself fall for Chat Noir?”

He hugged her tighter. “Yeah?” 

“It never seemed like it would be that hard. I think if it hadn’t been for Chat Blanc, it would have happened after New York.”

He laughed. “Really? New York was when I thought maybe I should ask out Marinette.” 

She looked up at him in horror. “Oh my god! We’re just perpetually screwed, aren’t we? We’re just going to keep missing each other over and over!”

He kissed her hand. “No m’lady,” he assured. “That can’t happen because now I know, and I can’t forget.” 

And then she was crying again, harder. “I don’t want to forget either.”

“I know,” he told her, kissing her hand again. “I promise it won’t be forever.” 

“I love you, Adrien.” 

“I love you, too.”

And that time, of the two of them, it was he who was stronger and able to slide his fingers across the reset. 

And he might have stayed in that loop far longer than he should have trying to figure out the way to the heart he had apparently already won.

He learned that she did enjoy his flirting whatever she said to the contrary, but the moments where he was vulnerable and genuine were the ones that seemed to move her the most.

But none of it was quite enough. If he wanted a kiss, he always had to tell her his name. 

But despite his failure, pulling himself out of that loop was the hardest thing he had ever done.

And that’s how he knew he was in trouble. 

… 

“Nino, you have to take this away from me,” Adrien said, holding out the snake miraculous. He had just arrived and released both his transformations. 

Nino took it, his eyebrows pinched together. “What? Why?” 

“Because I’m scared I’m going to go into a loop and I’m never going to come out of it.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Look! Being here with you, with you knowing everything, is amazing. It’s the only time I feel like myself, unless,” he held up the bracelet, “I’m using this and… it’s getting harder to pull myself out of the loops.” 

“Your visits to Ladybug?” 

“Yeah,” Adrien admitted. “She told me to go every single day so I would remember what it was like to be loved,” he paused for a second, trying to swallow the sudden lump in his throat. “The problem is I really really like being loved.” 

And then he couldn’t hold the tears back anymore. 

Nino pulled him by the arm down to the ground and sat right next to him shoulder to shoulder.

Adrien buried his face in his hands. 

“For the record, dude,” Nino whispered. “You are loved even outside a loop with Ladybug.” 

Adrien threw his arms around Nino. “I honestly don’t know why you put up with me at this point. I feel like you have to put up with a lot.”

Nino grinned. “Hey! I happen to like hanging out with you! This shift has been awesome because I get to see you way more often.” 

“And I’m not like messing up date night with Alya or anything, am I?” 

“Nah!” Nino waved away his concern. “Alya and I hangout in the mornings and during lunch. Lately Marinette has monopolized her evenings.” 

Adrien managed to keep a straight face at that. “If you and her ever do need a day away from the children, I’m sure Marinette and I could figure out a way to take care of ourselves for a day.” 

Nino burst out laughing. 

“What?! I’m a big boy and Marientte’s a big girl. We can take care of ourselves.” 

Nino just shook his head, still snickering. 

“Maybe all four of us could do something some time,” Nino suggested, his eyes sparkling.

Adrien narrowed his eyes. Did Nino know? He knew he couldn’t ask without giving it away, and he had just handed over the snake. 

“That sounds really nice,” Adrien said, knowing he wouldn’t be able to handle going on a double date that he had to pretend wasn’t a double date. But someday. 

He wanted to cry again, but his eyes remained dry. 

“So, you just want me to keep it?” Nino asked, holding up the bracelet. “Should I hide it here in the room? Or wear it?” 

“Wear it,” Adrien said. That was the only way Nino would know where it was at all times. “But don’t use it. Not even for an akuma.”

He didn’t want Nino to ever experience a loop on the battlefield. Not if he could help it. 

“I reserve the right to come save your ass if necessary,” Nino said as he slipped the miraculous around his wrist. 

Adrien laughed. “Okay, but please don’t unless you absolutely have to. I don’t need Ladybug pissed at me for giving away a miraculous.” 

Nino frowned at him then. “Why are you giving this to me, instead of back to her?” 

Adrien’s answer to that was complicated. Partly because he didn’t want Marinette to know that his loops with her were hurting him even as they gave him hope, and he definitely didn’t want her to know that he had fallen to the point of being borderline addicted. 

But there was also a strategic element to his choice. He could approach Nino in either form, and Nino would know to trust him. 

“You know who I am,” Adrien finally said. 

“Will you be okay without it?” Nino asked.

Adrien shrugged. “I don’t know. But I’m definitely not okay with it right now.” He paused, then looked at Nino. “I might be texting and calling you a lot over the next few days.” 

Nino laughed. “I can’t promise to answer right away all the time, but you can always do that, man. Always.” 

Adrien let his head fall onto Nino’s shoulder. “Have I ever told you that you’re the absolute best?” 

“I could stand to hear it a few more times,” Nino said. 

Adrien grinned. “Noted.”

…

Chapter Text

Adrien’s room felt more like a prison than it ever had before, and he had always felt like the walls were closing in on him a bit, and so that afternoon he had snuck out to Nino’s the second he had managed to chase Nathalie out of his room. 

Nino’s room - despite being small and cramped - never made Adrien feel claustrophobic. Adrien suspected it had something to do with the company. 

“What should my snake name be?” Nino asked out of nowhere.

“You’re not going to use it!” Adrien objected. “You don’t need a name.”

“Come on, dude! Just for fun!” 

Adrien sighed. “Basilisk.” 

Nino tapped his lips in consideration. “It’s okay. I don’t feel much like the king of anything.” 

“Python.” 

“Boring.”

“Diamondback.” 

Nino’s eyebrows furrowed together. “What does Diamondback have to do with anything?”

“It’s a type of snake,” Adrien explained, and then turned to Nino with a smirk. “But it’s also a type of turtle.” 

Nino just shook his head. “That’s a better reason not to use it. No associations with turtles! We gotta keep my identity super secret!”

“The best way to keep it secret is to not use the snake at all!” 

“What about something to do with time?” Nino asked, ignoring Adrien’s objection. 

“Cronos.” 

“Also boring! Dude! Why are you so bad at this?”

“I don’t see you coming up with anything.”

“Because you’re definitely the cooler of the two of us,” Nino said.  

Adrien shook his head. “Nino, I named myself Black Cat. I’m not super original when it comes to names.” 

Nino laughed. “Fair point.”

“And you are just as cool as me,” he insisted, though he whipped out his phone anyway and typed out a search for ‘names related to time’ and started scrolling through various sites with baby and pet names. 

“What do you think of Baqi?” Adrien asked. “It means eternal.” 

Nino frowned. “That’s an arabic name. Do you think me taking on an arabic name is potentially identity revealing?”

“Okay, here’s one in sanskrit. Ananta.”

Nino nodded. “A bit of a mouthful, but I like it.” 

Adrien’s eyebrows rose. “A mouthful compared to Carapace?”

Nino laughed. “What’s it mean?” 

“Infinite.” 

“Dude! Perfect. Let’s go with Ananta. I wonder what I look like with the snake.”

Adrien groaned, seriously regretting in that moment giving Nino the Snake instead of Ladybug.

“Do you not want me to?” Nino asked seriously.

Adrien waved his hand in encouragement. “Just do it. I’d be curious too.” He was curious, too. 

Nino grinned and scrambled to his feet. “Sass! Scales slither.”

Adrien found himself mirroring Nino’s excitement. These silly stupid moments with Nino were the ones that were keeping him sane at the moment. 

The rest of the time he was a bit of a mess. 

Adrien found himself a lot more resentful of his homework than normal when it stole away most of his time to spend on his friends and on himself now that he was used to being able to finish at least half of it in the space of five minutes as far as the rest of the world was concerned. 

And it didn’t help that it was suddenly so much harder to pay attention in class since he was hyper aware of Marinette sitting right behind him every single day. 

Seeing her in general was really hard because he knew how she felt. He knew that if he asked her out she would likely say yes, and he had to hold himself back. Before he had given up the snake, he had been able to scratch that itch by visiting her in the evenings in a time loop. 

Now? Now, he had to survive off of her garbled greetings and flustered blushes. 

He lived for her blushes. The blush that had always been there since he had apologized to her in the rain the day they met. He had thought she was just shy and self-conscious. But now, it was easy to recognize that she didn’t do it around anyone else - not even Chat Noir. That blush was reserved for Adrien Agreste and Adrien Agreste alone. 

It meant that she loved him. 

It was a good thing that it didn’t take much to trigger. Just a simple greeting often did the trick. 

“Good morning, Marinette.” 

And the pink would bloom across her cheeks like flowers in spring every time. 

That blush kept him from going out of his mind. It reminded him that she still loved him even if she wasn’t able to say it. 

A god, he hoped that she didn’t say anything because right now, he wasn’t ever going to be able to say no. 

“G-good morning, Adrien.”

He smiled. Her stutter was less reliable. She was getting better at talking to him, which he figured was a good sign, but he also loved that he could still fluster her on occasion. “How are you?” he asked. 

“I’m fine,” she said.

He didn’t like that answer. He knew that it wasn’t real. He turned to her as she sat down, and leaned into her space. “Marinette, how are you, really?” 

She looked at him in surprise. “I’m… things were rough for awhile, but I think I’m starting to get a handle on the new order of things.” 

“I’m glad.” And he meant it. Telling Alya had clearly changed things for her for the better. He was so glad she didn’t have to hold the weight of the world alone anymore. 

“How are you?” she asked. 

He shrugged. “I’m still figuring out my new order of things, but I like to think that things are actually trending in the right direction.” It might even be true. He wasn’t sure, to be honest. He was definitely getting better at coping with the absolute insanity his life had become if nothing else. 

“Will you let me know if you need anything?” she asked.

He smiled. “Of course.” 

It wasn’t everything he wanted. It wasn’t everything he knew the moment could be. 

But… it was enough.

At least most of the time. 

When it wasn’t, he called Nino and screamed about the injustice of it all, whined about how unfair and unreasonable his father was, cursed Shadowmoth’s existence to all nine levels of hell, ranted about how much he just wanted to be able to be done with it all so that he and Ladybug didn’t have to worry about akumas or the end of the world. They could just be teenagers.

They could just be happy. 

But Shadowmoth clearly had other plans. After a lull, the akumas exploded both in frequency and awfulness. The encounters were taking longer to handle - especially without the benefit of the snake - and Adrien was having a much harder time explaining his disappearances and his father was suddenly breathing down his neck even more than usual. 

“Your marks have not been up to your usual standard, Adrien.” 

“I’m sorry, father.”

“Need I remind you that you promised you would continue to excel if you started at public school? If you cannot maintain the usual standards of excellence, I will not hesitate to return you to lessons with private tutors.”

Adrien hung his head. “Yes, father.” 

“In the meantime, you will spend less time with your friends until your grades improve.” 

Adrien sighed, and trudged back to his room. The punishment meant almost nothing because as far as his father was concerned, he only was allotted an hour a week with his friends, and usually a photoshoot got scheduled on top of his scheduled “friend time”. And of course, Adrien was actually hanging out with Nino almost every day without his father’s knowledge. 

But he felt exhausted anyway. He was tired of shoots, he was tired of homework, he was tired of Akumas, and he was most definitely tired of pretending. Tired of pretending for the sake of his father’s company image, tired of pretending he wasn’t worn down to nothing from all the responsibilities of both his personas, tired of pretending Marinette was just a friend. 

He flopped onto his bed only for the akuma alert to go off two minutes later. Adrien groaned. It was the second one that day and the fifth one that week.

But Adrien dragged himself to his feet anyway. At least he would get to see Marinette again.

But it wasn’t Ladybug he ran into on the scene.

It was Ananta. 

“What the hell are you doing here?!” Chat Noir demanded. 

Ananta was hiding hunched over in an alleyway with the whole akuma scene in clear view. “Just offering a little insurance. I haven’t actually engaged in any of the battles, but they’ve seemed a little rough lately.”

“Battles?” Chat Noir repeated. “As in plural, as in more than one?”

Ananta winced. “Yeah, I’ve been doing this for the last four or five akumas because things have seemed super dicey for you. But I haven’t actually engaged with the akuma or anything.”

“How many loops?” Adrien asked harshly.

“So far, none. You’re that awesome, dude!” Ananta raved, clapping Chat Noir on the back.  “You would have known if I had been through a loop because I’d have to intervene to give you the info on the last loop, right?”

Adrien relaxed. “Right.” 

....

But the akuma after that, Nino did intervene. 

But at least Ananta had managed to stay out of Ladybug’s sight and out of any pictures. 

And after the fact, Nino had insisted he had only needed three loops to defeat that akuma. 

“I don’t like it,” Adrien had insisted anyway. “Please, don’t use it anymore.” 

“Dude! I’m not doing this for some adrenaline rush. I’m not like Alya who goes looking for trouble, or like you who insists on throwing yourself in front of the blasts. I’m doing this only because it’s clear that Hawkmoth has stepped up his game, and you need support.” 

Adrien started to object. 

“Ladybug needs support, too,” Nino added. 

Which was such a low blow. Because Adrien was never going to be able to argue with that. 

“Unless you want to take it back?” Nino offered.

Adrien considered it. He didn’t want Nino to get stuck in a battle loop. He didn’t want Nino to experience anything like Desperada. At least in his own case, he was already damaged and traumatized by what he had experienced.

But even the idea of taking it scared the crap out of him. Because there was no way he wouldn’t use it to visit Marinette. 

He missed her with every fiber of his being. It had only been three weeks. Three weeks where he hadn’t been able to have a conversation with her without filters, three weeks since he had been able to kiss her. It had been three excruciatingly long weeks where he hadn’t been able to tell her that Adrien and Chat Noir were one and the same. Three weeks since he had been truly seen for all that he was and truly loved because of it. 

And the more time that went by the less convinced he was that he’d be able to come out of that loop.

“No, you should still hang onto it,” he whispered. 

“Or if you wanted, we could give it back to Ladybug,” Nino suggested. “She could hand it out to whoever Viperion is.” 

Which was reasonable. Though Adrien wasn’t sure he wanted Luka to experience a bad battlefield loop either. 

Then the akuma alert rang simultaneously from both their phones. Adrien covered his hands in his face. 

“Gah! Does he never sleep?!” 

“Come on, mec. Let’s go.” 

“I’m coming! I’m coming!” 

During the battle, Nino had intervened, but he hadn’t intervened with Chat Noir; he had spoken to Ladybug in the final loop. The battle had gone amazingly smoothly after that, but Ananta slipped away before the traditional fist bump and Ladybug was not pleased. 

She was pissed. 

“You lost the snake?!” Ladybug demanded, her blue eyes flashing in anger.

“I didn’t lose it!” he said defensively. “I know exactly where it is.”

“You gave it away? Why?”

His claws tore through his own hair as he took a deep breath. “Because… it wasn’t safe with me anymore,” he admitted softly.

Some of her anger faded, replaced with concern. “What does that mean?”

“I can’t explain without telling you things you’ve told me not to tell you.” Which was mostly true. 

She fidgeted on the spot, considering. “Can you tell me who he is?” she asked. 

He laughed. “Definitely not.” 

“What?! Why not?”

“I gave it to my best friend, Ladybug. If you know who he is, you’ll know who I am. And that apparently might lead to the end of the world,” he bit out sarcastically. 

She frowned. “Are you okay?” 

“No,” he admitted. 

“What can I do?” she asked. 

“You can’t do anything,” he told her gently. “I’m handling it.” 

“I… I don’t like not knowing what’s going on with you,” she admitted. 

He laughed darkly. “Welcome to my world.”

She blushed. She actually blushed! He had made her blush as Chat Noir! Sure, it was probably more out of embarrassment than love, but he would take it!

“I guess I deserved that one,” she said. 

He took her hand and squeezed it. He wished he could sweep her into his arms and kiss her senseless, but he couldn’t risk that. “I know exactly how frustrating it is to be left in the dark.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. 

He shook his head, squeezing her hand through their gloves once again. What would it feel like to hold her hand when neither of them was transformed? He wanted to find out. He wanted it so bad.  

“I’m not trying to make you feel guilty,” he said. “I just want you to know that I understand. And I will tell you everything when it’s safe. In the meantime, can you please just trust me?”

She nodded. “Absolutely. You know that I do!”

And he did, now, didn’t he? 

He smiled. 

“I’m just…  I’m scared that if something happens to you, the snake will be lost,” she said.

“The person I gave it to knows how to get it back to you in that case,” he said.

“And how would he get it back to me?” she asked.

“He’d give it to you or to Rena Rouge during a patrol.”

She seemed startled at his inclusion of Rena Rouge, but she nodded. “You trust him?”

“I trust him more than I trust myself. And as much as I trust you.” 

“And they can handle the side effects of the snake?” 

Adrien sighed again. That was the million dollar question, wasn’t it? Could anyone handle the effects of the snake? “He’s done really well so far. This wasn’t the first battle where he’s been here, offering us a bit of insurance.”

She winced. “Yeah, the akumas have sucked lately.”

“Tell me about it.”

She sighed. “I’m sorry that I questioned you. I do trust you and your judgement. Your friend can keep the snake as long as you think it’s best.” 

“Thank you, LB,” he said softly. 

She nodded and smiled. He returned the expression and offered her a friendly salute. 

Then he vaulted straight for Nino’s family home. 

“How many loops?” Adrien asked without preamble. 

Nino rolled his eyes. “It was nineteen this time. But it wasn’t bad at all, dude. Kinda weird and trippy, but not so bad.”

But Adrien didn’t like it. He feared the number would keep growing. How many loops was too many? 

Adrien didn’t know.

…

His father had missed eight dinners in a row, and Adrien couldn’t decide if he felt relieved or disappointed.

On one hand, his father’s absence meant Adrien could ask to eat in his room, which meant he could escape the mansion that much sooner. And Nino actually wanted to spend time with Adrien.

It also meant he’d avoid his father’s censure about everything from his last photoshoot to the way he held his fork. Adrien simply did not have the energy to be on his best behavior.

But his father’s continued absence also felt like it reaffirmed Adrien’s fears - that his father didn’t care. And the longer his father’s absence the more desperate Adrien was for any sign, no matter how small, that his father had thought about him at all. 

When his father’s scowling face did join him at the dining room table on evening number nine, Adrien regretted ever wishing for his father to make an appearance. 

“Your grades have dropped unacceptably low,” were the first words out of his father’s mouth.

Adrien fought off his eye roll. He literally had two B’s and the rest of his classes were A’s. Admittedly one of them was borderline, but he didn’t think anyone else’s parents in his class would have found his performance subpar even if this was the lowest his own grades had ever been in his life.

“You also didn’t behave professionally at the last photoshoot. You arrived late and your hair and make-up had to be redone.”

Adrien sighed. That had been four Akumas ago. Or was it five? Honestly, Adrien was losing track. 

“We didn’t get all the shots we needed. It has been rescheduled for Monday morning. You have two weeks to turn around both your attitude and your grades,” he father said without an ounce of warmth or concern, “or you will return to home schooling.”

Adrien sighed. “I’m sorry I have disappointed you father. I have been… having a hard time maintaining my motivation lately.”

Gabriel’s expression did not change at all. “Why?” he asked. 

Adrien froze at the question. He didn’t know what to say because he knew there wasn’t a correct answer. And not answering at all wasn’t acceptable either. He was going to lose here no matter what. 

He shouldn’t have said anything other than he would try harder.

Well, if he was screwed no matter what, might as well go with the truth.

“I think I’ve been depressed lately,” he admitted. 

“You’re not qualified to make that assessment.”

“I suppose not,” Adrien conceded. But would his father offer to send him to someone who was? 

Most likely not.

“What do you have to be depressed about?” Gabriel asked coldly. 

And something within Adrien just snapped. Whether it was his sleep deprivation, being beyond overworked both physically and mentally, or his longing to drop all the masks, or some combination of all of it, Adrien didn’t know. 

“Are you kidding me right now?” Adrien demanded. “Every second of every day of my life is planned without my input or consideration. But I do all of it anyway. I train for national fencing competitions, get perfect scores, work I-don’t-know-how-many hours a week modeling for you. I have no space to breathe, let alone enjoy anything. I feel like a programmed robot going through a routine!”

The room fell into silence as Adrien’s tirade ended abruptly. Every muscle was locked and tense, waiting for punishment and condemnation. And despite that, Adrien couldn’t bring himself to regret it because, well, he was screwed either way at this point, so he might as well go down with a bang.

“Are you finished?” his father asked. He didn’t raise his voice, but Adrien flinched anyway. 

“Yes, father,” he said meekly. 

Gabriel removed his glasses and began cleaning them. “Clearly, I have expected too much of you.”

Adrien knew better than to find any relief in that conclusion. 

“I will arrange with Nathalie to have your schedule adjusted. She will add additional recreational activities suitable to a boy of your age, and reduce your current obligations significantly.” 

Which translated to they would remove him from school and schedule his so called free time with activities that Adrien had no interest in or with other teenagers he didn’t know.

“Father, I appreciate your concern,” he said formally. “That will not be necessary. I was having a weak moment. I will work harder,” he promised, though Adrien knew he wouldn’t be able to manage much more at the moment. 

His father nodded. “I look forward to seeing notes of your improved performance this Friday.” 

And now he had five days instead of two full weeks. 

Adrien wanted to scream. And he did scream later that night when he had escaped to Nino’s bedroom for the tenth time that week. He ranted and complained about the unfairness of it all, and Nino just listened with rapt attention.

“Can I at least deck him, dude? Please? ” Nino asked when Adrien had finally run out of steam. “Just once? He won’t even remember!” 

Adrien laughed. “It won’t help anything.”

“I might feel better,” Nino disagreed. “You might, too.” 

And then an akuma alert sounded from both of their phones. 

They both groaned, but a second later, they had both transformed and were leaping out of Nino’s bedroom window.

The akuma was a porcupine the size of a bus. It’s spines did not look remotely friendly. That first impression solidified tenfold when the akuma started hurling the spines off its back like javelins in a jousting tournament. 

But despite his initial misgivings, the fight could not have gone more smoothly. 

Ananta had barreled both he and Ladybug out of the way, and helped them identify the akumatized item pretty much instantly. The whole encounter lasted about three minutes. 

But when he turned to Ladybug and Ananta for their traditional fist bump, Ananta had pushed past the offered fist and tackled him in a hug. Adrien returned the embrace with a surprised grunt. A second later he felt Nino’s quaking form in his arms. 

Apparently, the fight hadn’t been all that smooth afterall. 

“How many loops?” Adrien asked softly. 

“You don’t want to know,” Nino sobbed into his shoulder. 

“Ananta, ” Adrien growled.

“1,674,” Nino admitted.

Ladybug tried to reassure them both with small hands on their shoulders. Nino just pulled her into the hug, too, and didn’t let go. 

“I’m really glad you’re both okay,” he cried and then he dissolved into wracking sobs again. Chat Noir and Ladybug both held him tightly.

But Ladybug couldn’t stay, as she was about to time out. She pulled away from their group hug with a concerned frown. 

“Are you going to be okay with him?” 

“Don’t worry,” Adrien assured her. “I’ll take him home and make sure he’s okay.” 

“I’m sorry I have to run,” she said.

“Don’t worry about it,” Adrien said again, before wrapping one of Nino’s arms over his shoulder and vaulting them both up to the nearest rooftop. 

He then ducked them both into a secluded alleyway that Chat Noir had used to transform before. Nino hadn’t stopped crying the entire time. 

“Nino, can you hear me?” 

Nino nodded.

“You need to lose the transformation, so we can feed Sass. Can you do that?” 

Nino managed to follow the instructions through hysterical sobs. Adrien followed suit and both kwami’s ate a slice of Plagg’s cheese. It was a sign of how serious everything was that neither kwami complained. Adrien transformed again.

“Okay Nino. You need to transform again, and then start a loop. Stay in that loop until you’re able to stop crying, you got it? It doesn’t matter how long it takes. I will be here with you the whole time.”

Nino was still shaking and crying, but he managed to choke out the transformation phrase and called for his second chance. 

Instantly, Ananta stood before him, infinitely calmer than he had been just a second prior. 

“Woah,” Adrien said. “That’s weird. How long?” 

“Just a few hours,” Nino said, his voice was quiet, but it was steady. Adrien wrapped him into a hug. 

“Thank you,” Nino whispered. 

“As you have told me many many times, as many times as you need, whenever you need.”

“I don’t know how you have dealt with it so well,” Nino said. 

“I mean, you don’t remember all the times I was as much of mess as you were just a few seconds ago.” 

“I remember you freaking out about learning Ladybug’s identity,” Nino countered. “I… I didn’t understand why you didn’t want me to use it for battles. I… get it now.” 

“I’m sorry,” Adrien whispered. 

Nino shook his head. “The alternative would have been so much worse, dude. You would have lost this one.” 

“Thank you for saving our lives then. I’m sorry for what it cost you.” 

Nino shrugged. “I think I’ll be okay. Can I keep it for a few more days? Abuse it a bit?” 

Adrien nodded. “Yeah of course. Abuse it like crazy and it will put space between you and what happened.”

Nino nodded, and actually smiled. And for the first time, Adrien was positive things would be okay. 

“I already have some ideas,” Nino said.  

“Do I want to know?” Adrien asked. 

Nino’s grin was wolfish. That was a no.

“Have fun, dude.”

… 

Nino still felt shaky the next morning. It was too easy to close his eyes and see his best friend impaled through the chest, his green eyes wide in shock. But it almost worked out in his favor because it hadn’t taken any convincing for his parents to agree he should stay home from school. They thought he was coming down with something - that he had chills. 

He didn’t correct them. 

He just rocked himself back and forth, nursing the tea his mother had brought up to him, and waited for both of them to leave for work. The second the door had closed behind them, he had bolted out his window as Ananta. 

The freerunning helped, but it wasn’t enough. He had just gotten too good at it - he could leap across rooftops almost without thinking now, and certainly without any fear. What could seem terrifying after everything he had seen the day before? 

And that was how Nino found himself on top of the Eiffel Tower staring down at the ground below - the ground that according to his best friend was 324 meters below him. Adrien had said at one point long before Nino had ever known of his friend’s superhero identity that it would take just over eight seconds to fall to the ground, probably a little longer because of air resistance. 

Nino had never thought anything of why Adrien had taken the time to calculate that. He had just assumed Adrien was a nerd who liked physics and had too much time on his hands. Now, he found himself wondering if Adrien had calculated that for an entirely different reason. 

Nino activated the second chance and leapt off the tower backwards with an ecstatic whoop. He slid his fingers across the bracelet five seconds into his fall, and rematerialized at the top of the tower giggling. 

Now, that was base jumping. He performed the trick dozens of times diving off the tower in different angles and positions. 

He knew Sass did not approve. The kwami had said as much when he mentioned the idea this morning. Adrien likely wouldn’t either, but Nino would only tell him well after the fact. 

But the adrenaline rush was exactly what he needed to wipe away the memories from the day before. 

Next, he had broken through his homeroom’s window, and swept Alya up in his arms. He definitely noticed Marinette’s disapproving glare, and Adrien burying his face in his hands, but he didn’t have to care about this. In four and a half minutes, this would have never happened. 

“Ask me to tell you that I love you,” he said. 

She arched her eyebrows. “Am I going to regret this?” 

“Nope! No repercussions today.” 

“Tell me that you love me,” she said, her face alight in a grin. 

“I love you,” he said. 

“How much?” 

“More than a superhero,” he said. 

She smiled, and her fingers locked around his neck. Then he kissed her hard. The whole class was catcalling behind them, and Ms. Bustier was trying to restore order. 

Alya was giggling against his lips. “I can’t believe you.” 

“I’m just getting started,” he promised. 

He went through hundreds more loops abducting Alya from parts of her day. It was different every time, and he was insanely grateful that she played along as soon as she realized it was him each without even knowing that he was having a tough time. 

Or maybe, she did know. Like, she had definitely covered Ananta’s exploits the day before on the Ladyblog. He hadn’t been able to bring himself to read the post, but someone had no doubt caught the tearful group hug at the end of the battle, and Alya would have had a better guess than most about what that likely meant. 

And so when he showed up as Ananta and revealed himself to be her boyfriend, she would know that had been him crying in Chat Noir’s arms. 

She didn’t ask questions or demand explanations. She just laughed and kissed him over and over. She let him abduct her from their dreary classes over and over, bury his face in her curls, and wrap himself in her protective embrace until his senses were overwhelmed with all things Alya.

God, he loved her so much. 

The tricky part was then trying to escape from each of their teachers. Surprisingly, Mendeliev had been the easiest to slip around, but Bustier had given him quite the run around. 

Once the school day was over he had followed Adrien’s limo home. He had intended to spend a few loops just being stupid with Adrien, but once there… well, he had been wanting to give Gabriel a piece of his mind since Nino had befriended his son. He had only held back because Adrien wanted him to, and Gabriel was terrifying. If only one of those things had been true, Nino thinks he would have pushed it ages ago. 

Ananta set the timer from the rooftop of the mansion and then broke through the front doors. 

Nathalie jumped to her feet, but he ignored her and stormed straight for Gabriel’s office. 

Gabriel rose to his feet more slowly than Nathalie had to face his intruder. 

“Gabriel Agreste, I’m here to tell you that you are the absolute worst parent.”

The older man gestured Nathalie away from the door. She stepped back, but she did not close the door. 

“You are trespassing on private property. I demand that you leave,” Gabriel said, barely raising his voice, which Nino found infuriating. 

“No! Not until I’ve said my piece.”

Gabriel took a visibly annoyed breath. “You’re clearly a teenager.” 

“Your point?”

“You’re hardly qualified to judge my parenting approaches.” 

Nino wanted to pull his hair out.

“Except that I am because I’m the one who picks Adrien back up every time you tear him down!”

Gabriel considered him stoically for a moment, his hands hidden behind his back. 

“Mr. Lahiffe, I have already banned you from the premises. Your adopting an anonymous persona does not negate those rules.” 

“Your rules are stupid and unfair! Adrien is amazing! He gets the highest grades! He has an insane work ethic, and is always kind and respectful to everyone! He does everything you ask of him! And then he does more! He’s an Olympic level fencer and is fluent in three languages!

“And somehow, you still find him wanting. You never give him the time of day. You never tell him you’re proud of him or that you love him! At best, you ignore him, and at worst you take the time to point out every tiny fault!” 

“He internalizes everything you say, everything you ask for. He tears himself to pieces trying to meet your impossible expectations, he buries his struggles and doubts, and you don’t even acknowledge his effort or his love for you.” 

Nino was shaking in rage at this point. Gabriel still seemed unaffected. 

“Are you finished?” he asked indifferently. 

“No! I’m not! I don’t know if you know how much you’ve harmed him! How many times I’ve been legit worried that he was going to hurt himself or give up! 

“Somehow, he’s been able to survive it. But not because of any of the crap  you’ve taught him about being strong and exceptional. He’s just that resilient!” 

“Which is a good thing because he’s also Chat Noir!”

Gabriel’s lips tightened and his eyes narrowed, and Nino wanted to run a victory lap for finally getting a reaction from the asshole. 

Nino barreled forward. “He manages being a superhero in between all the hoops and circus you run him through! And if he’s been struggling more than normal lately, it’s only because Hawkmoth has been putting him through the wringer.” 

“Nathalie!” Gabriel called. 

Nathalie marched into the room so fast, Nino was convinced she had been waiting right outside the open door the entire time listening in. 

“Didn’t we eliminate the possibility of Adrien being Chat Noir during Gorizilla?” 

Nathalie typed something into her tablet and handed it to him. 

“It looks like we did not get facial confirmation, sir. The person we presumed to be Adrien was wearing a helmet.” 

Gabriel removed his glasses and began cleaning them. “My own son, this entire time.” 

Nino felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise at Gabriel’s emotionless words that felt like a prison sentence.

Nino’s miraculous beeped. 

Gabriel’s stormy grey eyes shot toward the sound, and Nino took an involuntary step back.

And then Adrien’s father did something Nino never would have predicted. He lunged forward and struck Nino in the knee, and grabbed for the snake miraculous.

Nino dropped to the ground in agony, and jerked his arm just out of reach behind his back. 

“Second chance!” Nino screamed, sliding his other hand over the switch, grateful that he had so much practice in the last few days that the motion was automatic. 

He was back on the roof of the Agreste Mansion. His knee cap was fine, but his heartbeat was roaring in his ears. 

That had not gone as he had been expecting. Not at all. 

Gabriel had actually attacked him and tried to take his miraculous. 

Nino wasn’t sure what it all meant. But he knew it couldn’t be good. 

...

Chapter Text

Adrien started at the sudden thud on his bedroom floor. He looked up. Ananta was breathing heavily and his expression was solemn. Nino definitely didn’t look like he was just there to continue his day of goofing off and having a ridiculous time. 

“What’s wrong?” Adrien asked. 

“Your old man is a serious piece of work!”

“Did you punch him?” Adrien asked. 

Nino threw his hands up. “No! And I definitely should have! I have serious regrets! He fucking shattered my knee cap and tried to take the snake!“

Adrien dropped his stylus, and turned his full attention towards his best friend. “Umm… maybe you should start from the beginning.” 

Nino sighed, and flopped backwards onto Adrien’s bed. 

“I was just continuing to live out my reckless fantasies. I just confronted him! I yelled at him about how awful of a father he was, and the bastard barely reacted!” Nino complained. “Then I told him you were Chat Noir, and it was like he flipped a switch.” 

“You told him I was Chat Noir?” Adrien asked, his voice small. 

“It never happened now! You don’t need to worry.”

Adrien shook his head. “I wasn’t… Uh… I mean, how did he react?” Adrien asked softly. His throat had dropped into his gut.

Nino wasn’t even looking at him - his friend was staring at the ceiling, fidgeting in clear agitation. “He went scary silent! He called Nathalie in. Apparently, they’ve suspected you were Chat Noir before, and thought they had ruled it out during Gorizilla.”

“Did he say anything else?” Adrien asked.

“Umm… he said barely anything the whole time I was there. I was the one talking. I told him how amazing you are, and how much of a jerk he is, but he didn’t react.” 

“He said nothing else?” Adrien asked again, gripping the side of his chair, trying to disguise the urgency with which he needed to know.  

“He mostly just said his parenting choices were none of my business. But… he did say something melodramatic like, ‘my own son, this entire time,’” Nino said, dropping his voice into his lower register in a mock impersonation of Adrien’s father. “Like you being a superhero was a personal affront to him!” 

“He was disappointed then?” Adrien asked. 

Nino bolted into a sitting position, his expression horrified as he finally caught Adrien’s train of thought. “Dude! I’m sorry! I didn’t think! I didn’t even consider that! Of course it would matter to you what he thought of your dual identity. I definitely didn’t mean to hit you with all this like a train. I’m so sorry!” 

“It’s…” Adrien trailed off. It wasn’t exactly okay, but Adrien wanted it to be okay. He definitely knew Nino hadn’t been trying to hurt him, but Nino had also known that Adrien was avoiding talking to his father with the snake. “It doesn’t matter,” Adrien said instead. “Just… tell me what he thought of the whole thing.”

“I… I don’t know, dude. He was definitely super creepy. But… I think he was holding back everything he was thinking. I don’t know what he thinks. Do you want me to go in there and try and find out?” 

Adrien shook his head rapidly. “No… it’s better if we keep your knees intact, and make sure he doesn’t have access to the snake. Maybe, you shouldn’t be here at all.” 

“Dude, are you okay?” 

“He really attacked you?” 

Nino nodded. “When my miraculous beeped its first warning, he looked right at it and then lunged forward. And dude! He was super capable! He knew exactly how and where to strike to incapacitate me.” 

“Did he know who you were?” Adrien asked softly. 

Nino winced. “Yeah, he figured it out. It probably wasn’t hard based on what I was screaming at him.” 

Adrien wilted.

“It’s okay!” Nino insisted. “I reset. I’m fine.” 

Adrien disagreed. It wasn’t okay that his father was willing to attack a miraculous holder, but especially wasn’t okay that his father was willing to attack his friends. 

What would motivate him to do that? 

“He actually tried to take your miraculous?”

“Dude! He almost nabbed it. If it hadn’t been for yesterday where I had so much practice hitting that reset without thought, he might’ve been successful.”

Adrien fell quiet, but his mind was whirling, and he wasn’t happy with where it was going, but he couldn’t not consider it.

“Dude, what are you thinking?”

“Nino, what if my father is Hawkmoth?” Adrien was amazed at how steady his voice was. Maybe it was because he had heard it before. Or maybe, it was just starting to make too much sense.

“Dude! That’s a big leap. The guy is awful and honestly, I wouldn’t be that surprised, but surely there are other explanations for him being a jerk and a good fighter?”

“Ladybug suspected him once before. She had actual evidence.”

Nino’s eyes widened. “Shit.”

“Yeah,” Adrien said on an exhale.

“What was the evidence?” Nino asked quietly.

Adrien shook his head. “I don’t know. I got really defensive and snapped at her. And then he was akumatized, and she crossed him off the suspect list. I never thought about it. I didn’t want to think about it.”

Nino nodded. “Understandable. But what does he get out of being Hawkmoth? He already has pretty much everything!”

“To bring back maman.”

And it fit. The second the words were out of his mouth, Adrien wanted to throw up. He could see it. His father was used to getting what he wanted either through intimidation or money, but bringing back his mother was something he was denied. Instead of accepting that, grieving and moving on like a normal person, would his father have turned to magic?

“Nathalie would have to be in on it,” he thought out loud. Maybe that’s why she had been so horrified by his identity and insistent that she and his father couldn’t know his.

“I’m going to need the snake back, Nino,” Adrien announced, his voice monotone, but steady.

“What are you going to do?” Nino asked. 

“I’m going to find out for sure if my father is Hawkmoth,” Adrien said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Will you be okay, alone? Shouldn’t we call Ladybug, maybe bring in some reinforcements?”

Adrien shook his head. “Time loops are easier when you don’t have to explain everything you’ve learned to a team...” he trailed off, considering. “And honestly, I… I would prefer to know first. If we’re right, I will tell her. But I’ll set the time loop outside the mansion. If he makes any kind of move, I will reset immediately. It’ll be fine.”

“But… will you be? If it turns out that he is?” 

“I… I don’t know. But it’s like you said, Nino. I have to know.”

“I’ll be here.”

“No,” Adrien disagreed.

“No? Dude! If you’re right about all of this, I don’t want you here in this mansion alone!” 

Adrien shook his head. “Honestly, I don’t want to face this alone either, but… if Ladybug has taught me anything, it’s that we have to be smart about this. If you almost lost the snake… I might lose it, too. I might get captured or incapicated or worse. I need someone to know, who’s not here! If you don’t see me by tomorrow, you go straight to Alya with our suspicions, okay?”

Nino looked so torn, but in the end he nodded. “Okay. But can I give you the snake back after I’ve gone back home?”

“What? You don’t want to be carried over the threshold bridal style by your superhero crush?” Adrien teased, but if Nino’s somber face was anything to go by, the joke fell flat. 

“I don’t want you to be tired right before you go and confront your father.” 

… 

Adrien took one slow deep breath with his eyes closed. Then he activated the snake and launched himself through the open window in his father’s office.

“You are trespassing on private property. I demand that you leave,” Gabriel barked instantly, rising to his feet at Snake Noir’s intrusion. 

“Is that anyway to greet your friendly neighborhood superhero?” Snake Noir joked the way Adrien Agreste never would. 

“You are a teenager in possession of a power you do not understand. Using a miraculous that you just randomly found is hardly an accomplishment worthy of respect. Especially if you are using it to break into private residences.”

“I would think not having lost once to Hawkmoth, and having personally saved you on two separate occasions would be its own resume,” Adrien countered.

“Or perhaps, if you had given it up to him in that very first encounter, the city would already be free of his influence and I never would have needed rescue.”

“Are you seriously suggesting I should have handed over the power of destruction to a terrorist.” 

“Yes.” 

“You’re a real piece of work,” Adrien snapped. 

Gabriel picked up his phone. No doubt to call the authorities.

Adrien reset with a sigh.

“You are trespassing on private property. I demand that you leave.” 

“Actually, I happen to live here.”

Gabriel froze, his grey eyes rising to Snake Noir’s masked eyes.

“Adrien?”

“I realize you likely don’t approve.” 

“Of my son gallivanting around the city in that ridiculous cat suit while putting his life in mortal peril?” Gabriel barked. “No, I don’t approve.”

“And here I was hoping that some part of you would be proud of me,” Adrien admitted softly. 

“Adrien, I forbid you from continuing as a superhero. It’s far too dangerous.”

“You’re not going to remember this conversation in three minutes, father. You’re not in a position to make demands.”

Gabriel held out his hand. “Give me your ring and I will take care of it.”

Adrien backed away, knowing if what Nino had said was true, his father was more than capable of an effective strike. “I’m not going to give you my miraculous. Not either of them.” 

“Then what did you want to tell me?”

“I’ve come to ask if you’re Hawkmoth.” 

“You would accuse me? Your own father? Of being a domestic terrorist?”

“Would you cut it out and just answer the question?”

“Watch your tone!” 

“You’re worried about my tone?!”

“I see no reason to entertain your insolence and disrespect with a response.”

Adrien’s gut twisted. It wasn’t a denial. But it wasn’t a confirmation either. His father was not acting like an innocent man. And while Adrien was more convinced than ever that he was onto something, he wasn’t leaving until he was absolutely sure one way or the other.

“Father, I’m sorry.” He wasn’t actually sorry, but Adrien knew that an apology was often one of the only tools he had to calm his raging father. “I just… Ladybug suspected you. And I had to prove her wrong. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

His father’s face gave away nothing. There was no change in his expression or posture. 

“I’m just worried about you, Adrien,” his father said. “You’re a child. You shouldn’t be risking yourself. This isn’t your fight. Nor your responsibility.” 

“It’s not that big of a risk,” Adrien countered. “Ladybug always brings me back.” Adrien watched his father’s face carefully. 

And sure enough, his lips pressed together into a thin line. 

“You don’t have a say,” Adrien pressed further.

“I’m your father!” Gabriel insisted. 

“That doesn’t mean you get to make every decision about my life!” Adrien shouted back. He knew that he’d never have had the gall to say that if his father was going to remember his defiance, but it felt freeing to say. Maybe Nino had been right and he should have confronted his father with the snake weeks ago. 

“You are still a child! Until you’re an adult, it is my right to see to your safety and affairs.”

Adrien bristled at his father’s choice of words. His right?! Didn’t he mean responsibility?

But that was just it. His father probably didn’t see caring for him as a responsibility. Nathalie saw to his affairs, and his bodyguard saw to his safety. What did his father ever do other than try to control him? 

“I haven’t been a child since mother left! And I think I finally understand why she did! To get away from you controlling every part of her life!”

“How dare you?!”

“How dare I?” Adrien repeated. “You’re the one that drove her away!” 

Gabriel shoved his computer monitor off his desk. It fell to the ground with a shattered crash. Then Gabriel flipped the desk itself. 

Adrien took a step back, every muscle tense and ready to spring into retreat. He had never seen his father lose control like this. 

Gabriel stalked forward, over the debris, his breath suddenly heaving in his chest. 

“Get out of my house!” he screamed, spit droplets flying from his mouth.

Adrien didn’t need to be told twice. He reset. 

He stood once again on the mansion’s tiled roof. The sun was shining, the sky a perfect blue. Birds chirped in the garden and a car drove past the outer gates. 

There was no evidence that he and his father had been screaming at each other seconds prior. 

Because they hadn’t been. 

He drew in a shaky breath and sat down, burying his head in his hands and knees. The event now only existed as a figment in Adrien’s memory. 

His father hadn’t just lost control. He hadn’t just kicked Adrien out of his childhood home. 

And yet his hands were trembling and his heartbeat was roaring in his ears. 

Adrien was more convinced than ever that his father was the villain Ladybug had suspected he was. But what would get his father to come clean? Just asking hadn’t worked. Challenging his authority always made things worse. As apparently did direct confrontations.

Adrien stood up.

He knew what he had to say. 

He reset, and then dove back down into his father’s office for the fourth time. 

“You are trespassing on private property. I demand that you leave.” 

“Hello father,” Adrien greeted formally. 

Gabriel’s eyes widened, focused on his transformed suit. “Adrien?” 

“I’ve come to apologize to you. I’ve been fighting as Chat Noir this entire time to protect Paris. But that was before I realized what Hawkmoth was fighting for.”

Adrien could already see the anticipation gleaming in his father’s eyes as he leaned eagerly forward. 

“And what is Shadowmoth fighting for?” Gabriel asked. 

Did he seriously just correct the villain’s name to Shadowmoth? 

“You’re fighting to bring back maman,” Adrien told him. “And I want to help you. Ladybug…” and he had beat back a sob for even uttering these words. “Ladybug… she trusts me. I can… I can get you the miraculous of creation and I already have destruction,” he said, holding up his hand putting the ring on display.

“And you are willing to support Shadowmoth against the partner you’ve fought beside and defended for two years?”

“Family should come first, don’t you think?” Adrien said.

His father was silent, considering him stoically. 

“I would do anything for maman,” Adrien whispered. “To hear her voice again? To see her smile? Wouldn’t you?” It was what his father would have said to him had the identity reveal had played out in the reverse direction.

Gabriel smiled as he rose to his feet. “I should have trusted you with this ages ago, Adrien. I’m sorry. I doubted you. I wasn’t certain that you had the stomach to do what needed to be done. To think, you were the key to victory the entire time. I should have had more faith.”

Adrien’s whole world shattered at the unequivocal confirmation. And yet, he remained standing, his eyes were dry, and his hands remained steady. Some part of him wondered at his ability to take the revelation without flinching. He knew if he had learned this a year ago, he would be a puddle on the floor bawling, barely able to function. 

But a lot had changed in the last year. A lot had changed in just the last few weeks. Adrien suddenly had a lot of practice at dealing with world-ending revelations and the accompanying grief. A lot of practice at saying good-bye to people that he loved.

“I miss her so much,” Adrien said, his voice cracking. And this time he did nothing to suppress the tears that wanted to fall. Because in this much, he was being honest. He missed her. 

So much.

His father came around the desk, and swept Adrien up in a hug. For one weak moment, Adrien allowed himself to melt into the awkward embrace. 

And then, the snake miraculous beeped, and his father jerked away violently, his eyes blazing with unbridled rage.

“You’re in a time loop?!” his father roared. 

Adrien didn’t give him another second to react. 

He reset. And he was back on the mansion’s rooftop. He dropped like a lead weight to the roof tiles. 

He had just done something he had never done before. 

He had earned his father’s admiration and respect.

His love.

The tears came fast and hard, and Adrien just let himself heave and sob because he knew he couldn’t keep his father’s love. 

It came at a price Adrien was unwilling to pay.

And now, given what he knew he had to do, he knew without any doubt he would never have his father’s love.

Not for the rest of his life. 

…

It only took two more loops to stop crying. And then his experience as a superhero who always had to act, to strike, to make decisions in life or death situations took over. Because he was a professional with a job to do.

But before that, he would give his father a chance to surrender. Adrien knew that his father wouldn’t take it, but he had to try anyway if only for his own peace of mind years from this moment. 

“You are trespassing on private property. I demand that you leave.” 

God, Adrien was really getting sick of that line. 

“Gabriel Agreste, hand over the butterfly and peacock miraculouses without a fight, and I won’t tell a soul who you are.”

Adrien held out his hand, hoping with every fiber of his being that his father would just surrender. 

Gabriel glared at him, but didn’t say anything for several seconds. Was his father considering his escape options? Or was he actually considering surrendering the miraculouses? 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he eventually said stoically.

Snake Noir snorted. “This is my ninth loop. I’ve already confirmed you’re Hawkmoth. If you give it up, you can continue to live your life of privilege with your family. The city never need know who you are.” 

“That’s quite the generous offer coming from you,” Gabriel said. 

Gabriel was wrong. It was a selfish offer. Please father, please just take it. 

Snake Noir glanced at the portrait of his mother that hung behind Gabriel. “You’re not the only one who has lost someone you know.”

Gabriel launched to his feet, snarling. “What do you know of loss?”

“I lost my mother about three years ago, and I think I’m about to lose my father,” Adrien confessed calmly.

His father froze, his eyes widened. “Adrien?”

“Please father, give it up,” Adrien entreated. “Give it up and we can be a family.” 

“Adrien, we can be a family. A whole and complete family with your mother here with us again. Please, just help me. With Chat Noir on our side, our victory is certain.”

Adrien squeezed his eyes shut against his father’s pleas.

“I will forgive all the years you fought against me. Join me now, and we can bring her back.”

“We can’t,” Adrien sobbed.

“We can,” his father insisted. “The ladybug and black cat will grant any wish.” 

“The cost is too high.”

Gabriel snarled at him. “How can you be against me?! I did this all for you!” 

“For me?! Are you serious, right now?! This was always for yourself!”

“For both of us!” 

Adrien shook his head in agitation.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Adrien,” his father said, his voice contained an actual note of desperation. 

Adrien’s eyes shot to his father’s and considered him. 

His father might now want to hurt him. But he would. If that’s what it took. 

Hot tears spilled down his face. 

“So be it, father.” 

“Adrien!”

Adrien didn’t give him the chance to say anything else. 

… 

On his next loop, he came through the front doors rather than through the window, his focus on Nathalie. 

If his father deserved a chance, so did she. And he was far less certain what she would choose. 

Nathalie jumped to her feet instantly at his unexpected presence. 

“Don’t stand on my account,” he told her. “I know you still haven’t been feeling well.” 

“What can I do for you, M. Noir?” she said with as much dignity and professionalism as ever. Like his presence wasn’t abnormal at all. 

“Where does he keep it, Nathalie?” he asked. 

“Where does who keep what?” she asked, but it was clear to him that she was stalling when she glanced toward the doors to his father’s office. 

“My father?” he clarified, following her gaze. “Where does he keep the butterfly miraculous?” 

She stared at him, her expression almost unchanged except her pupils had dilated. It was good to know some things were capable of throwing Nathalie off her unshakeable foundation - that she was human.

She pushed the glasses up her nose. “I wouldn’t presume to know who your father is.” 

“Nathalie, you’ve already figured out that I’m Adrien, and you’ve clearly known about him for far longer if you were using the peacock.”

She flinched.

He walked right up to her, his eyes looking down at her. 

When had he grown taller than Nathalie? 

“I’m not going to tell you anything,” she said. 

His chest tightened painfully. He knew he had no claim to Nathalie’s affections, but he didn’t want to lose her, too. “Nathalie, please. Help me end this somewhat peacefully before one of us winds up killing the other. Please!” 

“He’s doing this to bring your mother back,” she confessed. 

He nodded. “Yeah, I got that. But I think maman might’ve had a good reason to leave. He has no right to force her back to a life she clearly didn’t want.” 

Nathalie shook her head. “She didn’t leave. She’s still here. She’s just in a magically induced coma.” 

He lost the ability to breathe. 

His mother was here? The whole time? They had let him believe she was gone, that she had left him? Or that she had died? When she was here the whole time?!  

His grip tightened around his baton, and his eyes burned.  

“Did either of you ever consider telling me?” he choked out. 

“He tried once, but you gave him your blessing to move on, and he decided you weren’t dedicated enough.”

Adrien shook his head. Of course he did. “I gave him my blessing to move on with you,” he snapped back. 

She glanced past him and adjusted her glasses. “Be that as it may,” she said softly. 

“I don’t understand you. You’re willing to die for him?”

She turned back to him, her eyes suddenly intense. “For all of you! To heal your family!” 

He took a step back. He wasn’t certain he wanted to be a part of this family. 

“So you won’t help me?” he concluded. 

“I won’t betray your father, Adrien. I can’t. I hate that it was you that we were fighting. And I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too, Nathalie.”

He reset the snake.

… 

It only took thirteen loops to figure out how to get to the super secret supervillain lair underneath the mansion.

And there she was, preserved perfectly. She was exactly as he remembered - beautiful and soft. She could have just been sleeping if she hadn’t been lying in a glass coffin like some fairy tale princess waiting for a kiss of true love.

“Hi maman,” he whispered, his claws tracing out the curve of her face on the glass. “It’s… good to see you,” he managed before his throat lodged itself closed. He leaned his forehead against the smooth surface and he shook as silent sobs overtook him. 

He fought to gain his breath back under control. He had so much he wanted to say to her. “So much has changed since you left us,” he whispered. “I wish I could tell you about all of it. 

“I’ve missed you so much,” he sobbed. 

“How did you get down here?!”

Adrien whirled, and found himself face to face with Shadowmoth. 

“It wasn’t hard,” Snake Noir said, before pointing to the window. “That’s a very big window.”

“What are you doing down here?” the villain demanded.

“Saying good-bye to my mother,” Adrien said. 

Whatever his father had expected him to say that was not it. He literally stopped in his tracks, his eyes going wide as if Adrien had just struck him. Which in a way, he supposed he had. “Adrien?” 

“Yes father?”

His father smiled. He actually smiled. “This is perfect.” 

Adrien had never disagreed with his father more in his life. This was about as far from perfect as they could get. 

“You can help me,” he was saying. “Help your mother. You have what we need! I’m sure if Ladybug knows it’s for your mother, she’ll be willing to help as well.”

Snake Noir shook his head, tears trailing over his mask. “We can’t revive her,” he whispered. 

“We can!”

“The price is too high.” 

“I will pay any price!” his father screamed. 

“And that’s exactly why you can’t revive her! Did you know there was another timeline out there? One where you akumatized me! And the whole fucking world was destroyed! Is that a price you’re willing to pay?”

“If you help me, there would be no reason to akumatize you.” 

“I can’t believe you! There’s no way I can convince you to give it up, is there?”

Gabriel ignored him, stalking closer. “Give me your miraculous!” 

“I won’t!” 

“This isn’t your battle to fight!” Gabriel snarled. “You are a child!” 

“I stopped being a child the day mother disappeared! Because you disappeared the same day she did! I thought…” Adrien broke off momentarily overwhelmed with his tears. “I thought you were grieving! Turns out you were terrorizing the whole city!”

“For you!” 

“That’s a load of bull shit!” Adrien screamed back.  

Shadowmoth surged forward, snarling. And Adrien had run out of walkway. “Is your mother not worth it? You would betray me? Betray your own mother? For what? Some girl you barely even know?”

Adrien laughed bitterly. At this point he knew Marinette far better than either of his parents. If only she knew that.

“You would make me choose between two women that I love?!” Adrien countered. 

“It shouldn’t be that hard. There are millions of women for you to fall in love with. You only have one mother.” 

“I could say the same to you,” Adrien said. “You could fall in love again. You only have one son.” 

Shadowmoth lunged forward, striking with his cane. Adrien parried the blow with his staff, and dodged to the side. “Maman wouldn’t want you to do this!” he yelled.

His father laughed. “This was her plan!”

Adrien stumbled, and lost his form. Shadowmoth struck again through the lapse in his defenses. 

Snake Noir took the strike to the shoulder, and fell backwards. “Then she doesn’t deserve to be revived!”

Gabriel sneered. “I failed in raising you.”

“You didn’t raise me at all! And I’m likely better for it!”

Shadowmoth struck downwards, but Adrien just flicked the snake miraculous before the cane could make contact again, and he was back on the mansion’s tiled roof overlooking his mother’s gardens. 

“Sass, scales rest.” The snake slipped away, but he was still Chat Noir. He vaulted blindly away needing to be anywhere else.

Once he had put half a mile between himself and his former home, he collapsed to the ground, and pulled open the communicator. 

“M’lady, I figured out who Shadowmoth is. And I took the liberty of doing some reconnaissance with the snake.” He swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. “And I-I… have a plan. Let’s meet on your balcony; I’ll be there in thirty minutes. Please invite Rena and Carapace. And don’t worry about costumes. I already know who all of you are and I think both the others know who you are, too. See you soon, princess.”

He ended the call, buried his head into his knees, curled up, and cried. 

…

Chapter Text

Even after Chat Noir had cried himself out, he didn’t move. He just sat there, wherever he was, and stared without focus into the distance.

He was already late to Marinette’s balcony. He knew that and still he couldn’t bring himself to his feet. 

He wanted to see Nino and Marinette. And Alya, too. He did.

He needed to see them. They were all he had left.

He fought back the tears that threatened to return. 

But everything was different now. As soon as he told them, everything was going to change, and he was afraid. He didn’t know what was going to happen to him when they took down his father. Part of him wished they didn’t have to. 

Would his friends see him differently now? Would they look at him with pity or disgust?

He choked back a sob.

“Chat Noir,” Sass interrupted his thoughts. “It is time.” 

And Sass was the expert on time, wasn’t he? 

Chat Noir dragged himself to his feet, and took off across the city, with Sass tangled in his hair. Once he was moving it was easy to keep going. He ran like there was an akuma after him even though he knew there wasn’t. 

His father didn’t know that his son had discovered anything. 

When he arrived, he expected all three of his friends to be waiting for him, but it was only Nino laying out on the lounge chair on Marinette’s balcony. And Adrien felt some of the tension bleed out of his shoulders as he landed, relieved that he didn’t have to face all of them at once. And that he didn’t have to explain anything to Nino.

Nino bolted to his feet, his golden eyes swirling with an intensity that Adrien couldn’t meet head on. 

“So… I take it our theory panned out.” 

Adrien burst into tears. 

Nino’s face tightened, and he yanked Chat Noir into his arms. “Dri, I’m so sorry.”

“You told me once in a loop… that I could come live with you?” Adrien whispered into Nino’s shoulder, as he trembled in his best friend’s hug. 

Nino pulled back, his eyes wide. “Yeah, absolutely! You can come tonight. And after…”

“After I’m an orphan,” Adrien filled in.

“They’re registered as foster parents. They can take you legally at any time.”

“I love you so much,” Adrien cried, crushing Nino in another hug.

“Dude! You’re still transformed,” Nino squeaked. “You’re gonna break my ribs.”

Adrien loosened his hold a bit. “Sorry, sorry. Where are the others?”

“Downstairs. I asked Marinette to give me a minute alone with you.”

“Will you… help me… tell them? Tell her?”

“Haven’t you already told her like hundreds of times? Isn’t she always thrilled?”

“No! She always starts crying! But this time it’s worse. I have to tell her I’m… his son…” His gaze fell to the balcony floor. 

Nino took his hand. “You are not defined by your father, Dri. We will not hold his choices against you.” 

“Thank you,” Adrien sniffled.

“I’ve got your back, dude. Always.”

Adrien nodded, suddenly incapable of words once again. He pulled Nino into another hug, this time, careful of his enhanced strength.

Nino squeezed back and didn’t let go until Adrien himself pulled back. 

“Can I ask you a question?” Adrien finally managed to ask. 

“Yeah?”

“Did you know about Marinette? You don’t seem surprised at where we are.”

Nino shrugged. “I mean… I didn’t know for sure, but the night you figured it out you were talking about Alya, and from that you figured out Ladybug. There’s only so many people who are that close to Alya. And well… I also had a bit of context from the other side of that dynamic.”

Nino straightened his hat. “And Alya may have mentioned a time or two that her struggles were to do with Marinette’s crap. So yeah, I’ve suspected pretty much since you figured it out.” And then Nino grinned, his eyes bright. “And don’t think I didn’t notice that you’ve practically been tripping over Marinette every time the two of you cross paths. I mean, some of that was there before, but your heart eyes have leveled up, dude. You are not subtle.”

Adrien laughed through his tears. “Thank you for never asking questions. I suspected you knew already, and when I left a message for Marinette about meeting here I may have implied to her that you knew, but I wasn’t sure. I just… I wanted you to be here.”

“I mean, you weren’t wrong, and I am here. I will always be here when you need me.” 

Adrien’s chest tightened all over again at those words. “Always?” he croaked. 

“Yes!” Nino said. “Well… like short of my family or Alya being in some kind of medical emergency, but I’d bail on them too if you were in a similar situation,” his friend was rambling at this point. 

“It’s okay, Nino. I get what you mean.” Adrien offered a small smile. “Thank you,” he said again, trying to get ahold of his tears. He was sick of crying and he didn’t want to face Marinette with tears already running down his face. But with Nino there, it was harder to keep everything clamped down. His friend had a way of bringing down all his defenses. 

“Anytime, dude.” 

Adrien slowly collected himself, and wiped away his tears. Nino just waited patiently until Adrien’s breathing had evened once again. 

“Are you ready?” Nino asked. 

Adrien shook his head. “No, but I want to see her anyway.” 

Nino nodded. “I’ll be right behind you.” 

Adrien knocked on the sky light once, and then whipped it open.

Marinette’s blue eyes whipped up to his immediately. She was sitting on her bed, her hands tangled at her chest like a writhing snake. Alya sat at her side with a soothing hand on Marinette’s shoulder. Clearly, Alya was playing the same role as Nino was for him. 

“Chaton?” she asked, her tone uncertain. She was nervous. Was she nervous about what he had to share with her? Or that he knew who she was? 

In spite of everything he found himself smiling. 

He jumped the rest of the way down, to land on her other side on the bed. Nino followed him and soon settled at his back. 

Chat Noir grasped each of Marinette’s hands in his own and squeezed.

“It’s okay, m’lady,” he whispered. “You don’t need to worry. Not about Chat Blanc or the end of the world.” 

She let out a sob. 

“And we’re about to take down Hawkmoth, so even ordinary akumas won’t be a concern for much longer.” 

“And if you’re worried I might be disappointed, you’re wrong. You’re amazing! Knowing who you are and having gotten to know you even better since I took on the snake, I promise I’m only more floored. You’re so strong and so resilient. You’re braver than me, and I like to think I’m pretty brave most of the time.” 

She was crying and nodding. “D-definitely brave,” she choked out. “You, I mean,” she clarified rapidly. “Not me.” 

“Yes, you,” he insisted, pulling her into his arms. Her form melted against him and he closed his eyes as they clung to one another. 

“How long have you known?” she finally asked. 

Adrien pulled away and turned to Nino. “How long have I known in normal time?” 

“About two months.” 

“That’s it?” 

Nino nodded.

“It feels like it’s been way longer.” 

Marinette’s eyes narrowed into suspicious slits. “How much longer?” she asked. 

Adrien shrugged. “I have no idea. You’ll have to ask Sass.” He glanced up into his hairline, and the snake kwami floated out into the open.

“He’s developed 418 days of memories in the last 71 days.”

Adrien felt like he had been punched in the gut. Four hundred days?! That was more than a year. A great deal more, and he had probably spent the largest chunk of that time with Marinette. 

“Kitty…” her eyes trembled, threatening tears again, her voice held only concern.

He shook his head. “That’s not important right now. We have more urgent matters to take care of.”

Her lips pressed together, and she nodded, but her face said they would be talking about this again later.

“You figured out Hawkmoth?”

Nino squeezed his shoulder.

“Gabriel Agreste,” he said.

Alya gasped, and Adrien’s eyes darted to her for a second, having forgotten that she was there. 

“But we ruled Gabriel Agreste out,” Marinette objected.

He shook his head. “We made a mistake,” Adrien said. “I made a mistake,” he corrected. If he hadn’t been so defensive, if he had just been willing to consider it, maybe this could have all ended ages ago. 

“Dude,” Nino objected softly.

Marinette turned to Alya. “We have to get Adrien out of there. We have to warn him. He can’t learn this when all of Paris does.”

“How do you know he won’t go to his father?” Adrien made himself ask, and held his breath. 

Both girls turned icy glares towards him. 

“Adrien is the kindest person I have ever met!” Marinette hissed. “But more than that, he has more integrity than anyone I know.” And then she glanced down into her folded hands. “Far more than me,” she added. “I look up to him.” 

He already knew that she loved him, but he couldn’t help the tears that burned at the edges of his eyes. She had never put it in quite these terms. 

“There’s no way he would be in support of Hawkmoth’s methods no matter what his goal is!” she added more forcefully. And Alya nodded emphatically in agreement.

The tears were now slipping over his mask.

“Told you, dude,” Nino murmured.

Adrien let out a watery laugh, turning back to his best friend with a nod, before facing Marinette again. 

“So are you going to help me figure out how to break the news to him and protect him from the fallout, or do I have to do it alone?” she challenged, her chin raised defiantly towards him. 

And despite everything, he found himself smiling again. She just had this way of lifting him up out of the deepest of emotional holes. Always, no matter what she knew or didn’t, no matter what side of the mask she was on. Or what side of the mask he was on for that matter. He was completely lost on this girl. With her by his side, and Nino at his back, he could face this, and he knew he would get through it. 

“That… won’t be necessary,” he told her. “Adrien’s…” he wanted to say fine, but he wasn’t fine. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been completely fine, “already safe.”

“Did you tell him? Is he okay?!” she demanded. “You didn’t leave him alone after dropping that bomb did you?”

He stared at her silently, unmoving. Was this it? The moment he got to tell her his name and she would never forget? 

Honestly, it wasn’t his best reveal. He had experienced a lot of them at this point, but he didn’t care anymore. He just wanted her to know. 

“Plagg, claws in.”

Marinette gasped in horror before throwing herself into his arms. He held her, finally feeling complete and secure in her affections, as he hadn’t since he had left the snake miraculous with Nino for safe keeping. 

She trembled in his arms, crying like she had every time he had revealed himself. And this time, he let himself cry, too. They held each other fiercely, crying this time together.

Nino’s arms were around his back and Alya was only a second behind. And he cried harder, held and protected by his dearest friends. 

No, they were more than that. 

They were his family. 

And these tears were different than the ones he had shed after confronting his father, after facing the reality that his mother had never left, after accidentally learning who Marinette was and that their potential relationship might lead to the end of the world.

These tears were less pure devastation, and more relief. They were mixed with love and healing. They were cathartic and eventually they ebbed.

But even once he was calm, the six arms that held him didn’t pull away. And he squeezed back tighter, let himself be enveloped in their warmth, acceptance, and love. 

But eventually he pulled away. They had a lot to talk about, a lot to plan, and a job to do. 

“Are you okay?” Marinette asked. 

“Not really,” he admitted. “But I think I will be. It’s better with you here.” His eyes swept across all three of them. “With all of you here.” 

“Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” Nino said. 

“Of course, we’re here,” Alya added. 

“We love you, Adrien,” Marinette said, her eyes shining with intensity. “We’ll always be here for you.” 

He smiled. “I think I’m just starting to learn what that means. Thank you all for teaching me what love could look like. I… I obviously didn’t have the best role models.”  

Nino tackled him again. And Marinette had his hand in a death grip, her eyes welling with tears once again. 

“Please, don’t cry,” he begged. “We need to talk about what to do about my father, and if you’re crying, I’m going to cry, and then we’ll never get anywhere.” 

She nodded, and her face smoothed out, her eyes determined. This was Ladybug’s game face. 

“You said you had a plan?” Marinette prompted.

“You’re going to hate it,” he warned. 

She snorted. “I always hate your plans.” 

He grinned, and then he shared what he had in mind. 

“You’re right. I hate it,” Marinette said when he was finished.

“It is a way to lay siege to the mansion without Gabriel suspecting we have uncovered his identity,” Nino said.

“But why can’t you be part of the attack as Chat Noir?” Alya asked. 

“Because if he’s alone in his office, there’s nothing preventing him from transforming and fleeing. This works better if I’m there as Adrien,” he said. 

“But you’ll be so vulnerable!” Marinette objected.

“No more vulnerable than I am every single day at the mansion,” he countered. 

Marinette’s lips pressed together into a thin line of displeasure, but she had no rebuttal because he was right. The only difference between today and any other day of Adrien living at the mansion was today, they knew.

“How are we going to use the snake if you’re not transformed?” Alya asked. 

Adrien jutted his thumb towards her boyfriend. “Nino. He’s Ananta.” He glanced back to Marinette. “So, what do you think?” 

She sighed. “I still don’t like it, but...”

“I’ll still have Plagg. It’s not like I can’t transform in an instant if things go sideways,” he countered. 

“You didn’t let me finish. I was going to say that even though I don’t like it, I think it’s a good plan. I may have a few suggestions in the details.”

He smirked. “You always do.” 

“But are you sure you want to do this?” she asked, staring at him. “He’s your father.”

The smile fell off his face. “I gave him multiple chances. He didn’t take them,” Adrien bit out coldly. “In fact, he kinda implied he would go through even me, if he had to.” 

“He knew who you were when he said that?” Nino asked, his tone clipped. 

Adrien nodded, not trusting his voice, but he did not miss the dark look Marinette and Nino exchanged. 

“Let’s kick his ass,” Marinette growled out.

…

Adrien sat across from his father in his office.

“Nathalie said you wanted to speak to me, but you wouldn’t tell her what it was about?” His father prompted, not looking up from his work table. 

“I wanted to talk about cutting piano from my list of extracurriculars.” 

Gabriel’s eyes shot up at him. “But your mother loved the piano.” 

And that was the reason Adrien would likely never give up the instrument. Because playing was a way to feel close to her, assuming his father wasn’t there criticizing every missed dynamic change. But it was also the reason he brought it up now. The more angry his father was now, the better.

“I know, but I feel like I’m only doing it because she loved it, and not because I love it, and my heart… just isn’t in it anymore.”

Gabriel glared sharply at him. 

“I’ve felt this way for awhile, but… I didn’t want to disappoint you.” 

“I’m disappointed,” his father said flatly. 

And Adrien didn’t even flinch at his father’s outright condemnation. It was going to get far worse before the hour was out.

The akuma alert went off on his phone. Adrien pulled out the device, and clicked on the news coverage. “Looks like an akuma.”

“It can’t be an akuma,” his father bit out.

“I know they can be inconvenient, father, but even you can’t control when akumas show up,” Adrien said, careful not to let any sarcasm slip into his words. 

Adrien unmuted the live video feed. 

“...the akuma appears to an aggrieved former employee of Gabriel Fashion. It is advised that citizens stay indoors as pedestrians are being transformed into an army,” Nadja’s familiar voice narrated. 

His father straightened his tie, and if Adrien hadn’t been watching closely he would have missed his father’s fingers slipping under the tie. 

He now knew where the butterfly was. 

“The akuma army is making progress toward the Agreste Manor,” his phone reported, displaying an angry mob marching down the street. Within moments, the crowd gathered at the gates.

“Don’t worry, father. I’m sure Ladybug and Chat Noir will take care of it quickly.” 

His father clenched his teeth.

“Nathalie,” he called into the intercom at his desk. “Can you confirm the location of the fan for the show?”

“I have my eyes on it, sir.”

And Nathalie still had the peacock. Good to know.

“I don’t understand it!” Gabriel growled under his breath. “That’s not an akuma.” 

The mob at the gate started climbing on top of one another to breach their gates. They were climbing inhumanly fast. 

“The heroes have arrived on the scene!” Nadja reported. 

Ladybug and Chat Noir flew into the scene, landing just on the other side of the gate, Rena Rouge, Ryuko, Vesperia, Carapace, and Ananta arrived seconds behind them. It was strange for Adrien to see Carapace and Ananta in the same frame now that the glamour had broken for him, but he had to hand it to Alya. It was a nice touch to further protect Nino’s identity. 

Carapace activated shelter around the mansion, and Adrien could see the green glow emanating from the window, and the team of seven heroes seemed to beat back the mob for a moment. 

But then Chat Noir took a hit meant for Ladybug and joined the akumatized army. He then converted Ryuko and Carapace into the akuma army.

Adrien stood up. “Maybe we should flee,” he suggested. 

But his father remained seated. “With the shield up, we can’t.” 

“So you’re just going to let them barrel in here and tear you to pieces?” Adrien demanded, wondering if he could goad his father into transforming. 

Gabriel stared at him stoically for a second, before rising to his feet and turning toward the portrait of his mother. 

“All of the heroes have been turned!” Nadja reported urgently. 

His father still didn’t move. Adrien tried not to feel the sting that his father didn’t trust him enough to reveal himself even to save their lives, but in some ways his father was correct to not trust him.

But it further solidified Adrien’s choice.

The window shattered - broken glass crashing across the floor. 

Ladybug zipped in, followed by Rena Rouge and Ananta, the only heroes that were actually present.

The yo-yo shot out, and wrapped around his father’s form, pinning his arms down. 

He could still transform. 

Ananta grabbed Adrien roughly by the shoulder, and shoved him towards his father. 

Adrien stumbled into him.

“Figures that the one time you fail, it’s not even a real akuma,” Gabriel growled at the heroes. 

Adrien patted his father's chest under the guise of catching his own balance.

“Nooroo, dark wings rise!” 

But nothing happened. 

Adrien stepped away from his father and handed the purple jewel to Ladybug. She took it from him with a solemn expression and a hand on his shoulder as if to ask if he was okay.  

He nodded.

“Who said anything about failing?” Ladybug asked, dramatically placing the butterfly miraculous in her yo-yo.

His father fought against his restraints, his eyes wild with pure rage, focused only on his son. “You betrayed me?” 

Adrien said nothing to him. He instead turned toward the heroes - his friends - his true family. “Nathalie had the peacock as of two minutes ago.” 

“On it,” Rena said, and left the office. 

“Adrien!” his father screamed. 

“How many loops?” Adrien asked Ananta, ignoring his father completely. 

His best friend grinned. “Only the second one!” 

Adrien frowned. “What happened during the first one?” 

Ananta waved his concern away. “Just some technical difficulties getting the illusion akuma and the broadcast lined up. You gave Rena a lot to juggle all at once.” 

“Adrien!” 

“I didn’t expect things to go so smoothly,” Adrien said. 

“The two of you are just that good at planning, dude,” Nino told him with a grin. 

“Adrien! Look at me!” Gabriel demanded. 

Adrien turned towards his father. 

“Yes, father?” he asked, his voice absent of all emotion.

“This was for our family! For your mother. You have condemned her.” 

“No, you condemned her when you decided to take an entire city hostage instead of asking for help, or learning to grieve like a normal person!” Adrien shouted back.

“So this is what? Revenge for not doing things your way?” Gabriel’s tone held only scorn. 

“I don’t expect you to understand,” Adrien said softly. “I did this to protect my family.”

“I am your family.” 

Adrien shook his head in disagreement. “You stopped being my family a long time ago.” Adrien held his head high. “I truly wish things could have been different.”

“Adrien! This was for you! It was always to bring her back for you,” Gabriel pleaded. 

Adrien considered his father for a moment. Gabriel actually believed that, didn’t he? It was almost sad. 

The police came in with Nathalie in cuffs, and a moment later, a second set of silver cuffs slid over Gabriel’s wrists.

“You will regret this!” Gabriel barked. 

“Goodbye, father.” 

“Do not call me that! You are no longer my son!”

Adrien watched as dispassionate and stone faced as his father ever was, as the officers took away his father and Nathalie. The second they were gone, he sagged to the floor. 

It was over. 

It was finally over. 

Somehow, he had thought victory would taste sweeter.

But Ananta was on one side, and his lady was on the other. He clung to them. His hands were trembling and his knees were made of jelly, but he didn’t cry. 

He wasn’t sure if it was because he was numb or if it was because he had no tears left to shed for his father. 

“Chaton, are you okay?” Ladybug asked. 

“Not yet,” he admitted softly. “But I think I will be.” 

“We’ll be with you every step of the way,” Ananta said.

“Thank you,” Adrien whispered. It didn’t seem like enough to say, but it was all he could manage.

Nino and Marinette both squeezed him tighter, and Alya joined in on the group hug. He let himself melt into their embrace, trusting that they both understood everything he didn’t know how to say. 

…

Chapter Text

The next few days were a blur, and honestly Adrien wasn’t sure how well he remembered any of it. But there were a few things that stood out in his recollections.

Ladybug had given a press conference. She explained that it was actually Adrien who had discovered his father’s identity and approached the heroes with what he knew, which had the benefit of actually being true. He hoped this would reduce the amount of suspicion he was under, even if years of being in the spotlight told him there would still be those who would be critical of his choices. Either for not figuring out his father’s identity a long time ago, or for betraying his own family. But he figured that was better than being under suspicion for the rest of his life.

Marinette had held his hand through the crowds of paparazzi that seemed to swarm him everywhere in the days after Hawkmoth’s arrest and trial. Nino, Chloé, and Alya often shoved through the crowd, creating space for them to move forward.

Nino’s parents, Naima and Emir Lahiffe, had remained steadfast in their willingness to take him in even in the light of his father’s identity reveal to the world at large. In fact, they were more terrified of him being placed at the mercy of the system.

And then Marinette’s parents had made him the same offer for almost the exact same reasons. 

Emir Lahiffe and Sabine Cheng had almost come to blows over who would take him in, while Nino and Marinette fought to keep the peace between their parents for Adrien’s sake. And in the end, Adrien suspected the Dupain-Chengs had only let it go because the Lahiffes were already legally registered as foster parents.

Though Nino told him it might be more that the Dupain-Chengs hoped he would one day become their son-in-law, and that living with his future wife while they were still minors might make things awkward. 

Whatever the reason, it was strange to be wanted, to actually be fought over.

But for the most part, Adrien wasn’t sure what day it was or what was taking place in his father’s trial or what he was missing at school. Nino kept bringing back homework for him, but the academic work could not hold his attention for more than a few minutes. He spent most of his time mindlessly watching some random anime or listening to music, but he was barely aware of any of that either. It was just to have some noise to drown out his thoughts and feelings. 

Sometimes it worked. Sometimes, it didn’t.

Today, he wasn’t even trying to distract himself. He was just laying spread out on Nino’s bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. 

When Nino came in Adrien started. Had a whole school day gone by already? Because Adrien had only gotten up from the bed once since Nino had left. Had he really just been staring listlessly at nothing for hours? 

Nino jumped into the bed beside him. “Talk to me, dude.”

“What’s there to say?” Adrien’s voice cracked from disuse. 

“Dude!! There’s a ton to say! And you might feel better if you got it out.”

Adrien considered it. Maybe Nino had a point. But where to begin?

“I always thought receiving the miraculous was the best thing that ever happened to me.” 

“And that’s not true anymore?” 

“That’s the thing, I think it still might be. But it’s so complicated now! I thought… I thought that defeating Hawkmoth would be a day of celebration.” 

“Yeah…”

“I want to hate him,” Adrien admitted. 

“You’re definitely allowed to hate him,” Nino said emphatically.

Adrien shook his head. “But I can’t.” 

“I get that, too,” Nino said, his voice suddenly soft. 

Adrien stared distantly at Nino’s bedroom wall. “I keep thinking that maybe I could have done something different.”

“You mean not take down Hawkmoth?” 

“No. I mean if I tried harder to be there for him when mother first disappeared, I might have been enough for him. That maybe he would have given up on his own. I did try in the beginning, but he only pulled away, and eventually I gave up trying. What if I had kept trying?” 

“Dude! He was the parent. It wasn’t your responsibility to take care of him.”

“But I wonder if I could have anyway,” Adrien said wistfully.

It was silent for a moment. Adrien felt Nino’s eyes on him, considering him stoically.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Nino said eventually. 

“Yeah, I know that. Sometimes, I don’t feel it though. I just wish there had been another way. I wish that in the end, I didn’t have to add to his pain.”

It was silent again.

“I still love him,” Adrien admitted. “Even knowing what he was, even knowing what he did specifically to me as Chat Noir, and as Adrien, too. I still love him.”

“Why?” Nino asked, but there was no judgement in the question. 

“Because I understand,” Adrien said. “I’ve actually been wondering that if we had figured each other out earlier, before Ladyubg and I had been through the fire together, before you and I were solid, I wonder if I would have joined him.”

Nino didn’t say anything, just continued to wait. 

“He was trying to revive my mother.” 

“Do you wish that he had?” Nino asked. 

Adrien closed his eyes. He missed her so much, but it was a distant ache. Not an all consuming ball of grief the way it had once been. He didn’t need her anymore.

“It’s totally normal if you feel that way. She was your maman,” Nino said.

“I… I don’t know if I even knew her.” 

Nino’s brows furrowed together. “What do you mean?”

“My father said on one of the loops that this had been her plan. She knew what was going to happen and she wanted to be revived. Doesn’t that mean she didn’t care if the city was terrorized?”

Nino leaned back. “I don’t know, dude. Maybe her plan was just to find the Ladybug and Black Cat the way it sounds like they found the butterfly and the peacock somewhere in a cave. Maybe it was your father that escalated that to terrorism. Or maybe her plan was world domination! We can’t know what she was thinking. She can’t tell us.”

“I remember her being so kind,” Adrien said. “I remember her smile and her patience. I remember laughing while she chased me as a child or smiled with pride after a piano recital.” He turned to Nino, looking at him fully for the first time since their conversation started. “How do I reconcile any of that with what I know now? What if she wasn’t a good person?”

“She didn’t have to be a good person to be a good maman.”

Tension Adrien didn’t know he had been feeling released.

“I guess that’s true. So I’m allowed to love her still?” And Adrien knew the question was a little ridiculous after just admitting that he still loved his father, but he needed to ask it anyway. 

“Dude! Of course! She’s your maman!”

“But haven’t you and Marientte and others said I don’t have to love my father?” 

Nino paused, clearly thinking for a moment. “I don’t think we owe our parents love. But you are also the only one who gets to decide how you feel about either of them. Sometimes, I don’t understand how you can love your father, but you say that you do and I can respect it.”

“To me though, the difference is, your mother gave you attention. She gave you her time and her care. So, even if she was the most evil person and the rest of the world condemns her, you can still love her. You can still recognize that she cared about you!”

“Nino?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you. Thank you for being the brother that I never had. I don’t know how I would have gotten through any part of this without you. You were there in the be…” Adrien trailed off, as his throat lodged closed and suddenly he was crying again. 

He was so sick of crying.

Nino’s arms wrapped around him from the side. “I love you, too, Dri. You’re one of the best people I know. You make it easy to love you.”

… 

A few more weeks went by and Adrien was starting to feel normal again. He was attending school and the class was happy to have him back and they were considerate enough to not ask questions.

And with Nino, Alya and Marinette things felt almost normal except easier somehow. Because there were no secrets. 

Marinette still occasionally stuttered and blushed around him, but she hadn’t said anything about her feelings. And it occurred to him that she didn’t know that he already knew. She probably wouldn’t say anything after everything in his life had been shaken up and scrambled. And even a week ago, he likely would have agreed. But now, he found himself hoping that she would say something.

He would have said something himself, but he still worried that maybe she saw him differently now. He didn’t want her saying yes to him out of some sense of guilt or obligation.

“Dude! Do you even hear yourself?” Nino had asked when Adrien shared his thoughts. 

“Thank you!” Plagg exclaimed.

“It’s not fair that there’s two of you ganging up on me,” Adrien whined. 

“She’s been crazy about you since forever!”

“As I’ve always told you!” Plagg added. “You just never listened.”

“Yeah, yeah yeah,” Adrien waved dismissively. 

He still thought it should be her choice. He wasn’t going to push it by asking her out before she was comfortable.

“She literally visits you every day!” Nino continued to rant. “You don’t do that for someone you don’t care about.”

“I’m not doubting that she cares about me! I’m doubting that she’s still in love with me.” 

Nino threw his hands up in frustration. “That’s you doubting yourself, dude. Trust me when I say her feelings for you have only gotten deeper.”

Adrien wanted to argue, but he didn’t have an argument. He hoped Nino was right. Marinette did visit him every day. Sometimes, she came in through the front door with Alya in tow, and the four of them would hang out in Nino’s room for the evening watching movies and throwing popcorn at one another.

But more often she swung into the room as Ladybug just after school was out before Nino had managed to get home. She had a knack for showing up whenever Nino couldn’t be there. He wondered if they were tag teaming, or if Marinette just wanted to be alone with him sometimes and was using her knowledge of Alya’s dating schedule to her advantage.

They didn’t do much. Sometimes, they barely even said anything. But he was so glad that she was there, offering him snuggles and company.

About a week after his father’s trial had started, she had offered him the use of the snake miraculous again.

He took one look at it and shook his head. “No.” 

She frowned. “But why? Won’t it put space between you and all that’s happened?” 

“It could do that, yes. But it will take me just as long, and none of you will remember it.” 

Her face softened in understanding.

“I already have too many memories that no one else shares. And besides, a big part of why I used it before was I was afraid I was going to be akumatized if I wasn’t okay.” Then he shrugged. “And I don’t have to worry about akumitization anymore. I’m actually allowed to have bad days now.”

“Wouldn’t you rather have good days?” 

“It’s kinda luxurious to have bad days actually,” he told her, his lips upturned into a smirk. “It’s real. It’s me. I don’t have to pretend. It’s freeing.”

Her arms had wrapped around his shoulders then. “I’m really really glad you don’t have to pretend anymore, Chaton.” 

He loved it when she called him that. Especially when he wasn’t transformed. It just held so much affection it made him physically feel warm.

He shook his head at himself. Nino was definitely right. She definitely still loved him. But when would she say something? He hoped it was soon.

He climbed up to the top of the new bunk bed that took up a huge corner of Nino’s room. 

“It’s your room, too, dude! You have to stop referring to it as mine.” 

Adrien rolled his eyes. It would always be Nino’s room in Adrien’s head. Adrien liked thinking of it as Nino’s room. He had always enjoyed being in Nino’s room, had always felt accepted, safe, and free in Nino’s room. Whereas, Adrien’s room had always felt like a cage. A really lavished, well funded, and fun cage. But still a cage.

Adrien glanced around the room. It was definitely a lot more cluttered now with Adrien’s clothes, and some of his things - mostly just games and anime that he thought Nino would enjoy. He didn’t bring everything. Not only was there no room, but also Adrien wasn’t all that attached to the things that he had collected over the years. 

Nino had wanted to bring the foosball table. His parents had vetoed him. Nino would still occasionally grumble about it, insisting that the game table could have doubled as a desk if they put a board over it, which always made Adrien smile fondly though he very much agreed with Nino’s parents.  

All in all, Adrien loved the new set up, and coveted how much time he got to spend with his best bro. He was even becoming more comfortable with Noël and Nino’s parents, though he often worried he might be intruding. 

Nino kept insisting he wasn’t. 

Breakfast was often a quiet sleepy affair, punctuated by yawns and snuggles. Naima made a point of including Adrien in these rituals. Adrien wasn’t sure if she was doing this from a place of genuine affection or a desire to make sure he felt included. Adrien was grateful either way even if he suspected he was stiff and awkward in his foster mother’s hug. But he definitely didn’t want her to stop. 

Dinners were an entirely different affair. They were loud and chaotic, and at least once a week they included Nino’s aunts, uncles, and his cousins. Adrien was definitely overwhelmed. He was accustomed to eating the vast majority of his meals alone in a huge empty dining room with vaulted ceilings.

Now, the ceiling was low, and there were so many people that every nook and corner was occupied. The chatter was constant and loud, and the smells. There were so many unfamiliar foods and spices Adrien had never experienced before and they all smelled different than anything he had ever eaten. 

Needless to say, it was a lot and Adrien had a lot of practice at playing as eye candy or as a wallflower during his father’s parties. But here, Emir kept pulling him in, thrusting more food into his hands or pulling him into some game with Nino’s cousins when Nino himself wasn’t there.

He had never once felt so welcomed.

Nino had caught him in tears after one such evening with the extended Lahiffe family. 

“Dri, what’s wrong?” 

Adrien shook his head rapidly. “Nothing! I’m happy!” Adrien insisted. 

“Could’ve fooled me, dude,” Nino said, taking a seat beside him. 

“Your family is so kind, Nino,” Adrien confessed. “I love them all so much even though I can barely keep track of their names! And no one cares, no one gets upset. They all go out of their way to include me! The son of Paris’s supervillain!”

“You’re not your father, dude!”

“I know! I know!” Adrien conceded. “But they don’t know me. Not really. And they’re all so nice. I’m afraid I’m going to do something wrong, and this will all just vanish. Like, it’s too good.” 

“But they do know you by proxy.”

Adrien frowned, turning to Nino with furrowed brows. “What do you mean?” 

“Dude! I’ve never really told you this, but… I was kind’ve a shut-in before we met.” 

“What?!” Adrien repeated, unable to picture it. 

“I didn’t really have friends. I mean, people were friendly to me and I was, too. But…” Nino shrugged. “I just never felt like I fit anywhere. I preferred to spend my lunch break listening to my tunes, you know?”

Adrien did not know any of this.

“So, why did you offer to be my friend that first day?” Adrien asked. 

Nino snorted. “You said Chloé was your only friend. And I’ve seen the way she treats Sabrina, dude. Not to mention Marinette and Kim. And I thought you deserved to know what a good friend could be like.” 

Adrien was crying again. 

Nino kept talking. “And with you, I don’t know. It was easy. You were always so straightforward and genuine. You were always so thankful, and it felt good. Like, you needed me. Being your friend never felt like a chore. I never preferred music over us hanging out. And I never felt like I didn’t belong like I did so many other times I tried to make friends.” 

“This is all great, and I’m glad that you told me, but what does it have to do with your family?” 

Nino glanced away. “Well, like I said, before I befriended you I kept completely to myself. That was true here, too. I was always quiet and in the corner and the other’s would try, but I ignored them.” 

“Why?” Adrien asked.

Nino shrugged. “I don’t know. I was an emo kid or something. But after you became my friend, I realized that I liked it and that maybe I wanted that with other people, too. It’s how I was able to become close with some of my cousins and with Alya. It was because of your example.” 

“Really?” 

“Really! And when I first started opening up, you were the only thing that I ever talked about.” He caught Adrien’s gaze and held it. “Everyone in this family knows who you are. And I don’t mean that in some celebrity sense. They know who you are to me. You never had to prove yourself to them. You still don’t. They already love you.”

Adrien slammed his arms around Nino. They almost fell over, but Nino was able to stabilize them both. 

“Dude!” Nino objected. 

“I’m not sorry,” Adrien murmured. Nino squeezed him harder. 

Adrien didn’t immediately stop feeling like an intruder at Lahiffe family events, and he occasionally still worried that he was a burden for Naima and Emir, especially when his foster parents were hounded by paparazzi wanting to know about Adrien.

“Someday, you’re going to realize you’re part of this family,” Nino had told him. “It’s not something you have to earn or deserve. Family just is!” 

Adrien wanted that to be true. He wanted it so bad. 

A few days later, Noël started pranking him. And the first time Adrien had tried to play it off. He understood that Noël might feel threatened by Adrien’s presence. Adrien who was suddenly stealing his older brother’s and parents’ attention. 

Noël had tricked him into throwing a pie into his own face. It was a quite clever setup, and Adrien really should have seen it coming. He had burst out laughing after the fact, licking the cream off his lips. But when he came out of a shower with his hair dyed green, Adrien was far less amused, nevermind that it was temporary. But when Adrien woke up with his face covered in sticky thick maple syrup, he was completely livid.

The younger boy lost it in a fit of maniacal giggles. 

“Noël!” Adrien shrieked in genuine anger. Noël’s laughter dissipated like it never was, and took off running. Adrien bolted out of bed and chased after him downstairs, through the living area, and into the kitchen.

Only when he spotted Emir and Naima watching, did Adrien halt on the spot, while Noël kept on running in a wide loop around him and went pounding back up the stairs. “I’m s-sorry!” Adrien stammered, his head hung in shame. How had he forgotten so quickly that he was a guest in this house.  

“Whatever for, dear?” Naima had asked with an amused smile, soaking a dish towel in the sink and holding it out to Adrien.

“Umm… for chasing Noël?”

Emir chuckled. “Based on the state of your face, Adrien, it looks like Noël might’ve deserved it.” 

“You’re not mad?” Adrien said, genuinely confused, taking the offered towel, and clearing is face of sticky residue.

“That depends on the state of your pillowcase. Noël Lahiffe get your butt back down in here!” Naima called. “But if it’s ruined, it’s not you I’m mad at,” she added drolly.

Noël came pounding back down the stairs and stood before his mother, his expression sullen and pouty. 

“What have I told you about pranks?” 

Noël hung his head. “That they have to be harmless.” 

“And was it harmless?” 

“Yes! I was going to add feathers, but Nino said he was allergic. So I didn’t do that.” 

“Nino knew about this?” Adrien asked, shocked. 

Noël nodded. “It was his idea!” 

Adrien bolted from the room. “Nino!” 

Emir and Naima's laughter echoed behind him.

Nino was laughing, but already on the fire escape, calling for his transformation. Adrien was only two seconds behind. 

So now, Chat Noir was chasing after Carapace. It took him a block to catch Carapace in a tackle. They rolled together onto a roof. 

Nino was still laughing hysterically.

“What the hell?” Adrien demanded.

Nino was still laughing. “Look! He wanted to prank you. That was his idea.”

“And you didn’t talk him out of it?”

Nino laughed. “No! Do you know how many times he’s pranked me?! He has a new target! I am not going to discourage that!”

Adrien was so confused. “You threw me under the bus? 

“You’ve always said you wanted little siblings!” Nino defended.

“Yeah, and?” Adrien asked, still not following.

“Well, little siblings are often an absolute pain! And now, you’re getting the full experience.”

Adrien felt like he had been sucker punched. “He’s treating me like he treats you?” he breathed out.

“Yup!” Nino said, popping the “p” with a huge grin on his face. 

Adrien was crying again. “I have a little brother,” he choked out, the revelation being real for the first time.

“You do,” Nino confirmed. 

“He’s so annoying.”

Nino laughed. “Yeah, he is!” 

“I love him.” 

“Yeah, me too,” Nino said with an exasperated sigh. 

When they went back, Adrien chased Noël again while the younger child shrieked in mock fear, but once Adrien caught him, he just seized Noël in a bear hug, gave him a sloppy wet kiss on the cheek-

“Ew! Gross!”

-and started tickling him relentlessly. He was rewarded with uncontrolled laughter. 

Afterwards, Adrien went to Nino’s parents and gave them both a hug - the type of hug he usually reserved for Nino or Marinette, where he just let himself cling to the person holding him. In the past, he had always been stiff, afraid to need their comfort and love, in fear that it would be gone. 

But now, he understood. He didn’t need to be afraid. “Thank you for accepting me not just into your home, but into your family,” Adrien said. 

“We are honored and privileged to be your family, Adrien,” Emir said. “We hope you realize that you will be expected to come home and visit every holiday season even once you’re an adult, out on your own.” 

Adrien had nodded vigorously, suddenly too choked up to form actual words. It might have taken him until he was sixteen, but Adrien had no doubt the Lahiffe’s would be his family for the rest of his life. And Noël was now his favorite.

“What?! Traitor!” Nino exclaimed. 

Adrien laughed. His phone buzzed, and he glanced down to see a text from Marinette. 

Princess: Meet me here in your suit as soon as you can. 

Adrien read the text, and the accompanying map. It was the rooftop where most of their patrols started. They used it because it was out of the way without a lot of sight lines, so it was difficult for people to get pictures.

Me: Are you okay? 

But she didn’t respond. He waited several seconds, his anxiety soaring. What could have happened that could be so urgent? 

“You okay, mec?” Nino asked. 

“I don’t know. Marinette wants me to meet up with her urgently.” 

The concern melted off of Nino’s face, and Adrien tried not to be irritated. 

“I’m going to head out,” Adrien said, gesturing to the window. “Cover for me?” 

Nino shook his head. “You don’t have to sneak out dude. Just go downstairs and say you’re heading out to see Marinette.” 

“But what if they say no?”

“They won’t,” Nino assured. 

“How can you be so sure?” 

Nino laughed. “Because I ask every few days to go meet Alya!” 

Adrien headed down to the dining room and found Nino’s parents sitting next to one another sharing a dessert. It was rather cute. 

“Uh… sorry to interrupt, but I was wondering if it was okay if I head out to see Marinette tonight?” Adrien asked. 

Both of Nino’s parents smiled at one another. 

“Be back by ten,” Emir said.

“And text us if anything comes up,” Naima added. 

Adrien was so shocked at how nonchalant they both were about his leaving, he didn’t move for several minutes.

Nino burst out laughing. “Better get a move on, dude!” Nino said, clapping him on the back. “Don’t want to keep the princess waiting.”

Adrien didn’t need to be told twice.

…

Chat Noir ran through the city, some of his panic fading as he leapt from one rooftop to another. If she had actually been in trouble she wouldn’t have texted. She would have called or shown up, or something. 

But he rushed anyway, eager to see her. 

The scene he arrived at was completely different than he had anticipated. 

There was a picnic blanket, with place settings for two complete with cutlery and wine glasses. Candles and rose petals were strewn everywhere, and music was playing - it sounded like one of Nino’s softer remixes. 

But his lady was nowhere in sight. 

“Hey, kitty cat.” 

He whirled around and there she was, but she was transformed as Multimouse, and he found himself blushing. 

“Cat got your tongue?” she prompted, with a teasing lilt to her voice. Even her eyes sparkled with amusement. 

He smiled brightly. “A mouse, actually.” Then he gestured to the setup. “What is all this?” 

“It’s your purrfect first date.” 

He grinned, and reached out for her hands. “Don’t you mean our purrfect first date?”

She nodded. “Oh, I hope so. But just so you know, this is only the beginning. The first course so to speak.”

“What else do you have planned?”

She shook her head. “Nope! You told me not to tell you!” 

The statement stopped him. “Wh-what did you do?” he asked, though he already knew. 

“I used the snake to interrogate you for information about creating the absolute perfect surprise.”

“How many loops?” 

She glanced away. “It was a lot. I lost count.” 

“Liar.” The snake didn’t let you lose count. 

Her eyes whirled to his. “Are you seriously accusing me of lying on our first date?”

“You don’t have to tell me. I just wanted to know what kind of kiss I should hit you with right now.”  

She smiled. “Oh, so I’m being graded on effort?”

He nodded. “Like under ten, you get a chaste kiss. One that is as sweet as you are.” And he kissed her exactly as he described.

“Mhmm,” she purred. 

“But if it’s a few dozen, that deserves a little teasing.” He nipped at her lips.

“Uh huh,” she agreed, her eyes closed.

“A few hundred? And I might push my luck.” And this time he gently sucked on her lower lip, and her lips parted. He accepted the invitation enthusiastically. 

They lost themselves in one another for several minutes before he finally pulled away.

She had her eyes closed and her smile was so pure and absolutely beautiful.

“So what’s the number, buginette?” he asked. 

“4,734.” 

He pulled away in surprise. “Marinette? Please tell me you weren’t that anxious about our first date. Because more than anything, I just want to spend time with you.”

She shook her head. “It wasn’t like that. I just… I had so much fun. You did, too. And most of those was just you telling me about all the loops that I didn’t remember.” And then she blushed. “Well, either that, or you, umm… demonstrating loops that I didn’t remember.”

He grinned. “So what you’re saying is that we made out a lot.”

Her blush deepened. “I also may have just wanted to know what it felt like.”

“And what did it feel like?” he asked softly. 

She glanced down at her feet. “It was way harder than I thought it would be.” 

“Why?” he asked, in genuine confusion.

“Because there were such amazing moments. Moments where I felt like I was flying and you were so happy.” She looked up at him then. “Happier than I’ve seen you since…” she trailed off glancing at him.

He squeezed her hands reassuringly. “You can say it.” 

She smiled. “The happiest I’ve seen you since Hawkmoth was taken in. And well, I wanted you to remember them,” she whispered. “And when I said as much, you would just smile so big and then reset it.”

He laughed. He couldn’t help it. And pulled her into his chest. “I’m glad you got the full experience. You would not believe how many times you did that to me.” 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “For ever putting you through all that.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“You knew all the secrets. You figured everything out. And instead of us shouldering that burden together, I let you carry it alone.” 

He smiled gently, and cradled the side of her face against his palm. 

“I wasn’t alone.”

“Weren’t you?” she asked, her eyes turning glassy.

He shook his head. “No, I had you. Even if you didn’t remember, I had you. I promise you were there for me the entire time.” 

“Even once you gave it to Nino?” 

He laughed. “I know you won’t believe it, but you still were. Every time you stumbled over your words, every time you blushed. I knew that you loved me. And most of the time that was enough.” 

“And when it wasn’t?” 

“I went crying to Nino.” 

She laughed. “I’m glad he’s been there for you, too.” 

“Nino’s awesome, but I don’t want to talk about him right now.”

She grinned, and nestled against his chest. “I’m really proud of you, Chaton. And I hope… I hope we never have to keep those kinds of secrets from one another again.”

“Are there some kinds of secrets you want to keep?” he asked, slightly appalled at even the idea of secrets between them. 

She grinned playfully. “Well, of course!” 

“What?!” 

“My boyfriend apparently likes over the top surprises!” 

All the tension bled out of his form and he smiled back at her. Her boyfriend. He was her boyfriend. He would never get sick of that word on her tongue. 

“I love you so much, Marinette.” 

“I love you, too.”

She kissed him again, and again. And he didn’t even need to go on a date. He was already flying, ecstatic and giddy beyond belief with her finally in his arms without any substantial secrets between them. 

“Adrien?” she whispered against his lips. 

“Yeah?” he breathed.

“Can we talk about how much time you spent in your time loops?” 

He pulled away. “We can if you want.”

“Sass said you had developed more than a year’s worth of memories.”

He rubbed the back of the neck. “Yeah, I was there,” he squeaked out in embarrassment. “That seems like it could be right.”

She looked appalled.

“Look! You told me to abuse it, and I abused it like crazy. But… when I realized I was getting addicted - getting to the point where I wasn’t sure I would be able to pull myself out of a loop, I gave it to Nino.”

She shook her head. “I’m not mad at you, kitty. I’m worried about what your life has been like, and how much I’ve missed that you needed that much of an escape.”

He eased her hand up to his mouth before depositing a gentle kiss. “I’m okay, now, m’lady.”

“I just hate that…”

He put a finger on her lips before she could spiral into guilt. “It was worth it to get to this moment. Now, shall we go have the most overplanned perfect first date that ever was?”

She nodded. “Please.”

It was the best first date ever, but more than that, it was the first of many to come.

...