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Published:
2021-08-13
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778
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1/1
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I Should've Went to Space With Dad

Summary:

T  : Quick update- the multiverse is real and some guy with a fishbowl head is here helping us fight monsters that probably belong in The Avatar
NF: Ok
T  : Oh and we had to hijack Peter's class trip to Europe to get his help
NF: exCUSE ME WHAT?! 
T  : Don't worry, we gave him the EDITH glasses so he'll be fine. 

Peter Parker's dad is off-world for a much-needed vacation because lord knows what kind of stress levels his dad is at from raising a teenage vigilante and dealing with the effects after Endgame. Meanwhile, back on Earth, Peter takes his chance to kick back and relax on his class trip to Europe, because nothing ever goes wrong on his field trips.
Well... except for when Peter got his powers from that spider bite at Oscorp... or when he had to save his AcaDeca team when they were dangling in an elevator in the Washington Monument... or when he was heading to MoMA before jumping out the bus to fight a purple giant with a nutsack for a chin in space...
Alright, so his maybe trips don't always go smoothly (that last one doesn't really count since he never actually made it to his destination) but 3.5 times the charm, right?

Notes:

This story picks up directly where its inspiration left off. I suggest reading that first for context and because if you're here to read about Nick Fury parenting Peter Parker, then you might as well enjoy that other story too.

Context Summary: Nick Fury adopted Peter Parker after SHIELD agents Mary and Richard Parker die. Carol Danvers is Peter's "space aunt". This is basically an AU of an AU. Other than that, everything is canon.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Peter: "wHaT cOuLd Go WrOnG" they said. "iTs JuSt A mOnTh Or tWo" they said. 

T  : Quick update- the multiverse is real and some guy with a fishbowl head is here helping us fight monsters that probably belong in The Avatar
NF: Ok
T  : Oh and we had to hijack Peter's class trip to Europe to get his help
NF: exCUSE ME WHAT?! 
T  : Don't worry, we gave him the EDITH glasses so he'll be fine. 

 

PP: MYSTERIO TRICKED ME INTO GIVING EDITH
PP: FUCK
PP: AND NOW HE HAS ACCESS TO REALLY SCARY POWERFUL DRONES 
CD: don't do anything stupid
CD: istg
PP: plz don't tell dad. he's supposed to be on vacation and I don't wanna worry him
PP: GTG 
CD: wait, Peter! 
CD: PETER! 

 

PP: you don't happen to have any bail money would you? 
CD: what the fuck happened?! 
PP: Got hit by a train
PP: Woke up in a jail cell in the Netherlands 
CD: 
CD: ...jesus christ
PP: nope, just me
CD: alright, smartass, as much as I love chatting with you, you gotta tell Talos about this!
CD: or literally anyone on Earth who can help you right now!!
PP: can't do that. I'm only telling you this to give you updates 'cause Mysterio combined BARF tech with EDITH so now he can make realistic simulations 
PP: so basically he can look like anyone and make the world look like something else
PP: kinda like alternating reality but not really since it's faked with tech 
CD: shit
CD: and EDITH is Stark tech right? so that means he could probably trace communications on earth
PP: yep. and since you're not on earth... 
CD: alright alright! just keep updating me at LEAST every six hours 
CD: or I swear I'll turn this ship around and tell your dad 
PP: fine
PP: gonna stop Mysterio/Quentin Beck from killing my friends. brb!

 

NF: PETER BENJAMIN PARKER-FURY
PP: shit
NF: CONSIDER YOUR SKINNY SPIDERY ASS GROUNDED FOR TWO WEEKS
NF: WHEN WERE YOU GONNA TELL ME 
NF: THAT YOU WERE GOING TO FIGHT A MOTHERFUCKING SUPERVILLAIN 
NF: ALONE
NF: WITHOUT ADULT SUPERVISION 
NF: AGAIN?!?!
NF: AND DON'T YOU DARE PULL THAT SELF-SACRIFICING BULLSHIT ABOUT LETTING ME HAVE A VACATION
PP: but I wasn't alone this time! Happy was there!
NF: AND THEN WHAT? 
NF: IF YOU GOT HURT, WOULD IT HAVE BEEN BETTER TO HEAR FROM HIM WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN UP TO?! 
PP: sorry, dad. 
NF: SORRY DOESN'T CUT IT. 
NF: Look. 
NF: I'm not mad at you or what happened. I saw footage of what happened and you did great work cleaning up the mess you made. 
NF: when shit hit the fan, you managed to calm down enough to think of a damn good plan that worked 
NF: your training paid off too and you kicked ass (nice work btw)
NF: you fixed your mistake and stopped an Avenger level threat from growing
NF: I'm proud of you, Peter. 
NF: BUT.
NF: You. Gotta. Tell. Me. This. Stuff. 
NF: if I weren't bald, I'd be getting gray hairs from the stuff you get into 
PP: Okay, dad. I promise to keep you updated with all my spidermanning from now on. Sorry about not telling you about these past few days.
NF: and it doesn't have to be hero stuff or major life events, yanno? 
NF: I wouldn't mind hearing about the small bits of whatever you do in and out of the suit
PP: I'll hold you to that. love you, dad.
NF: love you too, son
NF: but you're still grounded
PP: OH COME ON!
NF: you can still patrol AFTER you're completely healed and done with homework 
NF: but you're going straight home after school or acadeca. 
NF: the only contact you'll have with your friends is if it's school-related or if one of you is dying
NF: also, Spider-Man can't "accidentally" spend time with them on patrol. don't think you can pull a fast one on me 
PP: dammit
NF: meaning no hanging out with Ned
NF: and no date nights with MJ ;)
PP: double dammit
NF: and SPEAKING of pulling a fast one
NF: we're gonna add lying/people analysis to your training regimen
NF: meaning another hour of lessons have been added
PP: but daaaaad!
NF: trust me, kid. this'll save your life and save you from headaches in the future
NF: and even though it's not public knowledge, I'm not letting any punks thinking that the son of Nick-Fucking-Fury can be tricked a second time
PP: yeah that's fair


CD: so
CD: is the elevated blood pressure worth it?
NF: for this kid?
NF: definitely 

Notes:

I imagine after Nick found out that Peter was moonlighting as a spider vigilante, he took it upon himself to train Peter hand-to-hand, weapons training (because you can never be too prepared), how to maximize his powers, and provided customized gear before Tony Stark came along with a brand new super suit. I also figured that growing up as Nick Fury's kid originally gave him self-defence training for emergency situations, but since Spider-Man actively seeks trouble, Nick started an intense personalized training program (18-24 hours of training in total per week) because he wanted his son to be as physically capable as possible to protect himself.

Peter's last name is Fury, but for safety reasons to not get targeted by enemies of SHIELD, he is just known as Peter Parker to everyone (including the majority of SHIELD who think Peter is a young recruit/intern/trainee who is rarely seen but is somewhat known because his parents were SHIELD agents). Any documents that link Peter to Nick are impossible to find and access because of hand-wavy super-spy skills. The only people who know Peter's full name is Maria Hill, Phil Coulson, and Carol Danvers.