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Damian Wayne was not a stranger to the… strange.
He had seen some strange things over the years, but this was… Beyond… strange…
In a daze, he reached for his watch and the buttons that would patch him through directly to his father via the comm that was almost permanently lodged in his right ear.
He immediately regretted the action because what the hell would he even tell the man?
Damian blinked a couple of times, still not fully grasping how he would explain the situation to his father.
That’s when a girl his age, wearing what seemed to be a red and black spotted onesie, swung down from a roof on a… yoyo?
She pushed something into his hand with a serious expression.
It was a red frying pan with black polka dots.
“Hold it like this.”
She arranged it in his hands, so he held it as if he were a bride about to go down the aisle with a bouquet.
“Whatever you do, do not drop this frying pan,” she ordered him with a glare as severe as Batman’s.
“Uh…”
“The world depends on it,” she emphasized.
Then she zipped off with her yoyo, leaving Damian to stand there like an idiot.
He stood there for two entire minutes.
Just as he had the thought that this was an extremely elaborate prank to humiliate him, a guy in a teal, scaly suit came running towards him.
“She told you to keep that up!” he scolded.
Damian looked at him in confusion and was that a fucking lyre?
“I didn’t put it down!”
The guy’s eyes narrowed. “But you were thinking about it.”
Damian had never been this confused in his entire life.
The scaly guy ran off, leaving Damian once again in the company of the polka dotted frying pan.
He yelped (in a completely dignified way) and nearly dropped the thing when a marble the size of a fist hammered into the frying pan and cracked open.
It turned black and landed on the ground. A butterfly came out of what appeared to have been a completely solid object.
It was captured right in front of his nose with the snap of a yoyo.
He blinked and the polka-dot girl was in front of him again.
“I’ll take that,” she told him in a no-nonsense voice before throwing the frying pan into the air and shouting something.
Then billions of ladybugs fluttered through the air and all the damage from before was righted.
She turned back towards him with a smile. “Thank you for your help today. We really couldn’t have done it without you.”
She reached out her hand and he took it with an eloquent “uhhh.”
“Whoops – gotta go! Bug out!”
With that she was gone, and Damian left behind to deal with his own mental breakdown.
He finally pressed those buttons on the watch.
“Damian?” was his father’s worried reply.
“Father?” Damian hated the way his voice shook. “I think I may need to be tested for drugs. Psychedelics in particular.”