Archive of Our Own ^beta

🎬🎬🎬

When Chifuyu first met Baji Keisuke, he was 13 year old.

Honestly, almost being beaten up in front of someone younger actually really hurted his pride.

But the 12 year old that had helped him made it hard for Chifuyu to regret getting beat up.

“You’re 12?!” Chifuyu suddenly shouted, startling 12 year old Baji who had saved him a few hours prior.

“Yeah. Cool aren’t I?” Baji grinned, proud.

Chifuyu decided they should be the best of friends.

“Can I call you Keisuke?”

“Huh-?”

“Cool! Keisuke it is then! How are you so strong, Kei? Okay you know what? I’m calling you Kei.”

“Wha-”

“How are you so strong when you’re only 12 year old?!” Chifuyu eagerly asked, munching on the peyoung yakisoba he had split with Baji.

When he had almost choked on the peyoung yakisoba, Baji instantly handed him a bottle of water, lightly scolding the older male.

“Swallow first before you talk! You’ll choke again if you don’t swallow first.” Baji had said, a scowl on his face.

Chifuyu laughed at Baji’s slightly worried look, saying he’ll swallow first next time.

The next few minutes were just the sound of them munching on peyoung yakisoba, the two of them enjoying the food to the fullest.

After they’ve finished it, Chifuyu sighed happily, leaning against Baji’s bed.

Baji had excused himself a few moments prior, saying he’ll put the dishes in the sink first.

Chifuyu wondered how he ended up being saved by a kid.

Well, not really a kid. Baji was only a year younger, after all.

“What should I call you?” Baji asked as soon as he stepped back into the room, taking a seat on the floor beside Chifuyu.

“What do you want to call me?”

…

Baji hummed thoughtfully.

“…Fuyu-san. I want to call you Fuyu-san.” Baji said, grinning as his fangs peeked out.

“Fuyu-san it is then!” Chifuyu ruffled the younger’s hair, laughing when the younger had scowled and whined for Chifuyu to let go.

After they were done laughing, Baji suddenly turned to Chifuyu, all serious.

It was honestly hard to see it as serious when Chifuyu just thought the boy looked adorable.

“Fuyu-san?”

“Yes, Kei?”

“Wanna join my gang?”

…

Chifuyu pondered for a few moments.

“…why not?”

Chifuyu laughed when Baji had a stupidly excited smile on his face, eyes gleaming with excitement.

“It’s not my fault I’m excited for a new member!”

“Whatever you say, Kei.”

🎬🎬🎬

“How long have I been in this gang?”

“A year. Almost two years already, actually. Are you growing old, Fuyu-san?”

“Brat! Am definitely not.”

“Whatever floats your boat, Fuyu-san.”

They were on their way to a Toman meeting, the two growing closer as the days passed by.

Chifuyu could proudly say that Baji hung out at his place wayyy more than at his own place.

Baji’s mother had started complaining already.

“You definitely love Chifuyu-kun more than me!” Baji’s mother dramatically said, earning an immediate ‘no!’ from Baji.

“I’ll take care of him, ma’am! Everything will be just fine with me there!” Chifuyu said, smiling.

Over the years, Chifuyu had grown much closer to Baji’s mother, the woman already treating him like he’s her son.

“Oi. Fuyu-san. Hop on.” Baji snapped Chifuyu from the blonde’s thoughts.

“Yeah yeah Kei, as strict as alwa-”

Chifuyu stopped talking when he noticed Baji had a new bike.

It honestly looked epic, but…

“It does not have a backseat?” Chifuyu asked, squinting his eyes and blinking a few times, just in case his eyes were playing tricks on him.

“No. Are you scared, Fuyu-san?” Baji teased, a smirk on his lips.

Chifuyu was sooo not losing to this brat.

“Absolutely not! I’m pretty sure I can ride it better than you!” Chifuyu taunted, was about to get on it when Baji grabbed his wrist and tugged the older male backwards.

Chifuyu didn’t realise how Baji had actually grown taller than him-

He could feel Baji’s chest rising up and down on his back, surprisingly defined despite him being… 14? Well, almost 14.

Chifuyu being 15, yet not getting any taller only made him scowl.

“How are you so tall?” Chifuyu asked, the younger still hasn’t let go of his wrist and he was still pressed against the younger’s chests-

“I’ll be at the front, Fuyu-san.” Baji finally said, letting go of Chifuyu’s wrist and making himself comfortable on the bike.

Chifuyu scowled.

“But I’m older?”

Baji smiled smugly.

“And this is my bike? Wanna ride or not?”

Chifuyu gave up, getting on the bike and before contemplating where he should place his hands.

Huh.

“Just wrapped your arms around my waist.”

Baji’s voice was so low, Chifuyu almost missed it if their surrounding were any louder.

“Wha-”

“I won’t repeat myself, Fuyu-san.”

And that was the only warning Chifuyu got before the younger started the bike and immediately sped up.

Out of reflex, Chifuyu immediately wrapped his arms around Baji’s waist, was about to scold the younger for being so reckless, when he stopped himself.

Baji was blushing.

And he had this stupidly cute smile on his face.

“It’s not that hard to wrap your arms now, is it, Fuyu-san?” Baji teased, his voice for some reason super clear despite the loud roaring of the bike’s engines.

Chifuyu let out a sound from the back of his throat, not sure of what to say as he let himself enjoy the warmth from the younger’s body.

That was the first time Chifuyu’s heart skipped a beat for Baji.

🎬🎬🎬

“What does it feel like? To be ordered around by a kid?” 14 year old Mikey asked, eating his dorayaki as he stared at Chifuyu.

Chifuyu shrugged.

“Well, Kei’s a cool captain. AND he’s also not a kid. Like, have you seen him? He looked, like, 16 at least.” Chifuyu answered, glaring at a certain black-haired male who was chatting with the other first division members.

Chifuyu still couldn’t believe how Baji managed to grow so well.

“A cool captain huh?” Mikey murmured, staring at Chifuyu as if he was analysing the blonde.

Chifuyu smiled at Mikey’s sort-of-question.

“Yeah! A dedicated one at that. He’s strong, cool, dedicated, and like, very admirable.” Chifuyu said, realising how he had almost outed the fact that he liked his captain.

Uhh…

Mikey surely wouldn’t notice-

“So you like him?”

Chifuyu wished he could control his blush.

“Uhhh no! No way! He’s younger than me-”

“Are you saying you won’t ever date him if you got the chance, Fuyu-san?” Mikey asked, a mischievous smile on his lips as he used the nickname that was supposedly saved for only Baji to use.

“Wha- No! I mean… uhh…”

Chifuyu couldn’t believe a 14 year old could make him so flustered-

“I thought that nickname was saved for me, Fuyu-san?” Chifuyu heard a very familiar voice deadpanned.

Wrong timing, Baji.

“Oh! Uhhh about that-”

“Na, Baji. Can’t I call him Fuyu-san too? It’s cute! Definitely suits him.” Mikey said, a challenging eyebrow raised at Baji.

You’re not helping at all, Sano Manjirou!

Chifuyu sighed, was about to diffuse this childish dispute when Baji had wrapped an arm around Chifuyu’s shoulders, pulling the older into him.

Chifuyu was once again reminded how built Baji was-

“Well, Fuyu-san said that the nickname was only for me. Me only. No one else. So don’t call him that.” Baji said, narrowing his eyes at Mikey.

Mikey suddenly had a very amused look all over his face, also a tad of realisation.

“So it’s mutual.” Mikey suddenly announced, grabbing the others’ attention.

“What’s happening?” 13 year old Draken asked, turning to the president for more information.

Though Mikey only smiled, patting Draken’s head and saying it was nothing.

Even after Mikey had left with Draken to buy more snacks, Baji still kept his arm around Chifuyu’s shoulders, ruffling Chifuyu’s hair from time to time.

“You’re getting more and more comfortable these days, Kei. Look at you, treating me like an arm rest.” Chifuyu scowled, pouting when Baji didn’t seem affected at all.

This brat-

Baji suddenly got into Chifuyu’s personal space, their faces close as Chifuyu couldn’t manage to stop himself from yelping.

God he actually yelped-

“Yeah, try not to think about ‘why I keep on dragging you everywhere I go’ too hard. You probably will short circuited if you realise what I’m actually trying to do. Not like I’m trying to show off to my friends how cute my vice captain is or anything.” Baji said, sarcasm lacing his voice.

It’s not Chifuyu’s fault that he couldn’t focus with the way he could feel Baji’s breath on his lips.

Baji waited for a response, yet seeing his vice captain’s dazed face, Baji decided he’ll definitely won’t get any responses anytime soon.

Letting go of Chifuyu, Baji patted Chifuyu’s cheeks two times, a smug smile on his lips.

“Cat got your tongue, eh? Cute.” Baji teased before leaving the older hanging, approaching Mitsuya instead.

It took a few moments for Chifuyu to collect himself and actually realised that he actually spaced out when Baji was talking to him-

Unacceptable-

“Matsuno Chifuyu, get a hold of yourself!” Chifuyu grumbled, shaking his head and was about to bang his forehead on the wall when someone had grabbed his wrist and dragged him away.

It was easy to guess who had grabbed his wrist out of nowhere.

“Where are you dragging me to?” Chifuyu whined, feeling Kei’s hold on him loosen yet tight enough for him to not escape.

“Away from them. They kept on staring at you.” Baji grumbled, letting go of Chifuyu’s wrist to hop on his bike.

Chifuyu tilted his head.

“Why were they staring at me again?” Chifuyu asked, confused.

Baji stared at him as if he’s the most oblivious person in the world.

Which he’s obviously not.

“Because you’re acting so fucking cute and it’s driving me insane.” Baji deadpanned, staring right into Chifuyu’s eyes.

As expected, Chifuyu short circuited.

Baji, knowing this, groaned.

“You’re so predictable sometimes.” Baji murmured, pulling Chifuyu and making the older male sit in front of him, practically between his legs.

By the time Chifuyu snapped out of whatever trance he was in, Baji was already starting his bike, Chifuyu looking small with Baji almost hugging him.

“Uhhh I almost fall off my seat here Kei-”

“Then just leaned against me, Fuyu-san. I don’t bite, really.” Baji mumbled before speeding up, Chifuyu yelping and immediately leaned against Baji’s chest and-

-and it’s actually sooo comforting Chifuyu wished he could stay like this forever-

“Don’t sleep on me now.” Baji suddenly whispered against Chifuyu’s ear, causing the blonde to shiver and, of course, internally screamed.

“Definitely not sleeping. Nope. The wind is hitting my face too frequently for me to fall asleep.” Chifuyu stammered, opting to enjoy the harsh breeze hitting his face.

He couldn’t help but feel his heart skip a beat when he realised the wind was suddenly not hitting his face as hard as before, indicating Baji was actually slowing down.

Baji could be so considerate sometimes it’s heart-warming.

“Lean closer. You might actually fall off.” Baji murmured, carefully balancing the bike with one hand as he wrapped an arm around Chifuyu’s waist securely, pulling Chifuyu closer.

So Chifuyu might actually combust-

“I’m gonna speed up, Fuyu-san. Mom has actually been nagging me to come home.” Baji suddenly said, wrapping his arm around Chifuyu’s waist tighter.

“Wha- Why didn’t you tell me earlier- More importantly, why didn’t Baji-san tell me?!” Chifuyu frowned.

Though he couldn’t really stay mad when he realised how unsafe it was for Baji to hug his waist while riding the bike.

“I’ll lean on you from now on, okay? So ride the bike properly.” Chifuyu scolded, was about to unwrap Baji’s hand around his waist when Baji proposed another idea.

“How about you helped me ride instead, Fuyu-san? Place your hand on the other handle. I like just staring at you looking pretty for me in my arms, but you could lend me a hand.”

So uhh Baji just actually called Chifuyu pretty-

Chifuyu was not okay-

Blindly following Baji’s suggestion, Chifuyu used one of his hands to grab the other handle, his other hand awkwardly on his thigh until Baji’s hand that was on his waist grabbed his not-so-useful hand and intertwined them.

“Not that hard now, isn’t it?” Baji murmured.

Chifuyu wondered how he didn’t combust during the whole way to their apartment building, his heart beating a tad too fast for his liking.

When Baji dropped off Chifuyu in front of the blonde’s apartment, the younger simply ruffled Chifuyu’s hair and said a short good night, seemingly unaffected about whatever that had just happened.

Chifuyu didn’t really like that for some reason.

In the end, Chifuyu still fell asleep, the thought of a certain young captain invading his head the whole night.

🎬🎬🎬

“Fuyu-san.” Baji had called out, sitting on Chifuyu’s bed and brushing through Peke J’s fur with his fingers.

“What’s up?” Chifuyu asked back, sitting on the floor and leaning against his bed as he re-read his shoujo manga.

“Tomorrow’s your birthday, isn’t it?” Baji asked, still brushing through Peke J’s fur but with his eyes on the back of Chifuyu’s head.

Chifuyu pondered.

Huh.

“I actually almost forgot.” Chifuyu casually said, as if it was not a big deal.

It was.

Chifuyu was startled when Baji had suddenly snatched the shoujo manga he’s reading, effectively catching his attention.

“Did you just say you almost forgot your birthday, Fuyu-san?” Baji inquired, eyes narrowed at Chifuyu.

“You’re 15. Not 51.” Baji deadpanned, placing the manga on the bed far from Chifuyu’s reach.

“Well, I just don’t find it important-”

“You said that every single year and, just like every single year, I’m telling you it is, in fact, important. Don’t you want to celebrate your birthday with someone you like? Like how the main characters in the shoujo manga do?” Baji interrupted Chifuyu, eyes squinting.

Someone he likes, huh?

“Well, sometimes I do. But I’m already seeing him and hanging out with him every day, so there’s nothing special.” Chifuyu carelessly said before he realised the meaning behind his words.

Uhh

It’s not that obvious right-

“Then how about asking him to do something extraordinary?” Baji suggested, dismissing whatever Chifuyu had said prior.

Something extraordinary?

“For instance, what have you guys been doing?” Baji asked, acting as if he didn’t know what Chifuyu always does with the person he likes.

Though the subtle smile on Baji’s lips was an instant give away that the younger knew what he was doing.

So Chifuyu decided to play fire with fire.

“So like, we’ve had dates for tons of times already,”

Baji was already squirming in his seat-

The fact that Chifuyu was talking about Baji but the younger immediately not liking it was hilarious-

“He always messaged me. A lot. Sometimes I feel like he’s just too good for me.”

Well, Chifuyu’s not really lying, but Baji didn’t usually text because if he wanted to say good night, he could just knock on Chifuyu’s door.

Though a little lie won’t hurt, no?

Chifuyu suddenly recalled that one moment and then-

“Oh, and we’ve also cuddled!”

Chifuyu was never flipped over by someone so fast-

He couldn’t really do anything when Baji suddenly grabbed his wrist and pulled him onto the bed, gripping Chifuyu’s wrists a little too tightly as he towered over him.

“You what?!” Baji literally hissed, squeezing Chifuyu’s wrists together a little too tightly unconsciously.

Chifuyu winced at that.

“K-Kei-” Chifuyu murmured, trying to escape Baji’s deathly grip.

This guy’s strength especially irked Chifuyu at times like these.

Baji seemed to snap out of whatever trance he was in when Chifuyu accidentally let out a whine, the older immediately getting flustered at his childish act.

“Fuck- Fuyu-san sorry- are you okay?” Baji let go, immediately rubbing on Chifuyu’s wrists softly.

Chifuyu didn’t know what exactly he should do help-

“Yeah- I’m- I’m good.” Chifuyu breathed out, slowly pulling his hands away from Baji’s hold before creating some distance between Baji and him.

…

Great.

Baji had this sad and guilty look on his face.

Chifuyu absolutely despised it.

“Hey… I was joking, okay? We’ve never cuddled, really. The only time we’re close to cuddling was when you accidentally drank beer and asked me to hug you on my couch.” Chifuyu said, combing through Baji’s hair with his fingers in an attempt to comfort the younger.

Chifuyu was confused when Baji froze.

“What’s wro-”

“I’ve cuddled you, Fuyu-san?” Baji asked, looking out of it.

Crap.

This was why Chifuyu didn’t want to tell the younger.

“Y-yeah. Yup. But it’s kinda a one time thin-”

“Can we do it again then? Make it our tradition or something.” Baji asked, eyes gleaming with hope.

Times like these were the times Chifuyu was reminded that Baji was younger than him.

“Uh- y-yeah, sure?” Chifuyu murmured, already regretting his choice to agree.

Chifuyu wouldn’t last even a second in Baji’s arms-

“Great!” was the only warning Chifuyu got before he was pulled into Baji’s chest, their bodies slotting together easily and comfortably.

Baji instantly made himself comfortable, nuzzling Chifuyu’s neck as he casually breathed in.

Chifuyu got goosebumps.

Chifuyu felt chills when he felt Baji’s arm around his waist, his fingers grazing the hem of Chifuyu’s shirt and Chifuyu’s skin.

Bro they’re still young come on-

At least wait until Baji’s 18 or something-

“Fuyu-san?”

Stop talking against Chifuyu’s neck like that with that breathy voice!

“Y-yeah?”

“Have you confessed to the guy you like?”

…

“…no…”

“Why not?”

A pause.

“I just don’t want them to have me as their first partner? I think… there’s other people more suited for him.”

…

“Well, I think you should tell them how you feel, Fuyu-san.” Baji murmured, lips grazing Chifuyu’s skin.

Chifuyu hummed in response, afraid of using his voice.

“Tomorrow, how about doing all those shoujo manga scenes you like. Your favourites. For your birthday, I mean.” Baji suddenly opened back the topic.

“Not a bad idea. With you? Yeah definitely not a bad idea.” Chifuyu mumbled, smiling.

They cuddled like that in silence and when Chifuyu started feeling sleepy, he felt hands in his hair, brushing them as he heard Baji wishing him a ‘happy advanced birthday’.

Ya know what?

Best advanced birthday ever.

🎬🎬🎬

Chifuyu remembered it was in July 2005 when Baji said,

“Let’s go on a date for my 15th birthday.”

Chifuyu almost choked on air.

“Ex-Excuse me?”

“You’re excused.”

Chifuyu groaned.

They were just chilling at Chifuyu’s balcony, the place wide enough for one person but it became a little bit suffocating when two people tried to squeeze in.

Though Chifuyu was sure the way his heart was beating was definitely not because he’s suffocating.

It was a tranquil night, calmer than other nights. So the two decided to just stargaze.

Then Baji suddenly dropped the bomb.

“No. You’re not, excusing me, Kei. What do you mean by going on a date on your birthday?” Chifuyu asked, trying to understand what’s the younger male thinking.

“I said what I said. On November 3rd, I’ll take you out on a date. And will confess whatever cliche stuff I’ve wanted to say to you for a while now.” Baji casually said, as if he was speaking about the weather.

Chifuyu gripped the railings of his balcony.

“Why… not now?” Chifuyu murmured, feeling himself flushed when Baji had stared at him.

“Because I want my present to be my first kiss with you.” Baji grinned, amused when Chifuyu had gone beet red.

Chifuyu felt his heart lurched forward when he felt Baji placing a kiss on the side of his forehead.

“It’s kinda hard enough as it is to hold myself back. But I really want it to be on a special day.” Baji grinned, chuckling when he noticed the blonde had short circuited.

Can’t believe this guy who short circuited every time Baji as much as breathed was a 16 year old.

It was oddly endearing.

“You haven’t agreed to my proposal yet, Fuyu-san.” Baji teased, enjoying the reactions he received from Chifuyu.

“Ah… uhh… of course. I’ll definitely…uhh… go on a date… with you…” Chifuyu mumbled, flushing.

It’s so entertaining to tease the older sometimes.

“Promise?” Baji held out his pinky finger.

Baji grinned when the older tried acting unaffected, hooking their pinky fingers together as he turned away, not realising his red ears were a dead give away of how embarrassed he was.

Baji took the chance to pull Chifuyu’s hand and placed a kiss on Chifuyu’s knuckles, satisfied with the bewildered look on Chifuyu’s face.

“You’re horrible.”

“You know you like it, Fuyu-san.”

“I’m telling your mom.”

“Not if I shut you up.”

“And how would you shut me up?”

A sly grin.

“A kiss, maybe?”

Baji ended up going back to his apartment with a throbbing forehead.

“Fuyu-san’s flick sure packs a punch.” Baji mumbled, chuckling as the sight of Chifuyu blushing played on repeat in his head.

“He sure looks and acts young.” Baji chuckled, going to bed that night with his head full of a certain blushing blonde.

🎬🎬🎬

“Kei!”

Baji thanked Chifuyu when the older male had managed to knock someone out before said someone managed to lay a hand on Baji.

“Fuyu-san!”

The blonde luckily got enough time to block someone’s punch.

By the end of the 3rd of August fight, Toman obviously won.

“Kei- Geez, I told you to not overdo it with the punching and all! There’s sooo many cuts on your face! Mom’s gonna be so mad!” Chifuyu grumbled, tilting Baji’s face so that Chifuyu didn’t have to stand on the tips of his toes to inspect the younger’s injuries.

Benefits of getting into fights: Baji’s edition.

Number one; the thrill.

Number two; Chifuyu’s never-ending attention and caring treatment.

Baji’s pretty sure it’s a win-win situation.

“Well, at least I have fun. Won’t you have fun treating my injuries and staring at my attractive looks?” Baji teased, laughing when the blonde only huffed.

Couldn’t deny the facts, obviously.

“Well, let’s go now. The police are on their way anyway.” Chifuyu patted Baji’s chest before running towards Baji’s bike first.

Baji was about to follow him when he realised he couldn’t find Mikey anywhere.

Huh.

“I’ll just find him. Then I’ll go back to Fuyu-san.” Baji thought, searching for Toman’s president.

When he found the president though, it was not somewhere he expected.

What’s he doing with Kisaki Tetta?

After eavesdropping the conversation and putting puzzle pieces together, Baji frowned.

He didn’t like this.

He absolutely didn’t like Kisaki Tetta.

“What’s he trying to do?” Baji mumbled, clenching his fists, was about to just barge into the conversation when he felt someone tugging on his wrist.

“Kei? You’re good? The police are gone now. I thought you were captured or something….” Chifuyu’s voice was laced with worry, drifting into a mumble by the end of his sentence.

Chifuyu squeezed Baji’s wrist, leaning his forehead on Baji’s chest as he told Baji to not disappear on him like that.

Baji stared at Chifuyu.

…

Toman’s in danger.

And Chifuyu…

Chifuyu should not be in danger too.

So did his treasures.

“Is there something wrong?” Chifuyu asked when Baji had stayed quiet far too long for Chifuyu’s liking.

…

“Nothing. Let’s just get out of here.” Baji finally responded, interlacing his fingers with Chifuyu and walking away, making their way towards his bike.

He’ll handle it by himself.

🎬🎬🎬

“Kei!”

…

“Kei!”

…

“Stop walking away, Kei! Talk to me!”

It was raining heavily, and as much as Baji hated cliche stuff, he probably hated this surrounding the most.

Raining.

Don’t things usually break in the rain?

“BAJI KEISUKE!”

Baji felt a harsh tug on his wrist, stopping himself from keeping on walking under the pouring rain.

“Why did you leave Toman? And joining Valhalla? What do you have in mind?” Chifuyu asked, sounding desperate and lost.

Baji didn’t like the older sounding like that at all.

“I’m just bored of Toman. Is that so hard to accept?” Baji spat those words out, knowing how wrong it tasted on his tongue.

But this was for the best.

It’s okay if he’s the only traitor around.

“Yes! It’s hard to accept! I’ve known you for years, Kei. You’ve always loved Toman! Why exactly would you…” Chifuyu was tearing up.

Baji made Chifuyu tear up-

“Maybe you just don’t know me well enough.”

Baji knew that statement was wrong.

Wrong in so many ways.

Chifuyu was his vice captain, his tutor, his best friend, his partner, his-

his love.

There was, no way, Chifuyu didn’t know Baji like the back of his hand.

But it had to be done.

It had to be said.

Chifuyu wouldn’t back down if Baji didn’t convince the older to let him go.

If Chifuyu were to keep on pleading for him to come back to Toman with those sad and lost eyes,

Baji’s resolve might actually wavered.

Baji tried his best to keep his cold act on, watching as Chifuyu finally broke down, tears streaming down his cheeks as he struggled to talk, hand still gripping Baji’s wrist tightly.

“Liar! It’s not good to lie, Kei! Didn’t Baji-san teach you?” Chifuyu said, more tears streaming down his cheeks.

Chifuyu took Baji’s hand in his, holding them in his hands before placing them against his mouth as he murmured.

“You can tell me anything, Kei. Just… please… don’t leave Toman like this. Don’t leave Mikey.”

Don’t leave me.

Baji yanked his hands away and turned, keeping them occupied inside his pockets to stop himself from reaching out to Chifuyu and just comfort him.

“It’s my choice, Fuyu-san. Don’t act like you know me so well.” Baji seethed, averting his gaze away from Chifuyu who had started sobbing.

Without wasting any moment, Baji ran, leaving the older to cry by himself in the middle of nowhere.

By the time Baji had reached his house, tears were already streaming down his cheeks, Baji struggling to keep his emotions in check.

He had to be stronger.

For Toman.

For his treasures.

For Chifuyu.

“Just wait for a little while, Baji Keisuke. Just a little bit more acting. Until 31st October. On 3rd November, you’ll get to share your first kiss with Matsuno Chifuyu.” Baji mumbled, heart aching when he recalled the lost look in Chifuyu’s eyes.

He did that.

He caused Chifuyu’s tears.

…

Was this worth it?

In the end of the day, even though a part of him didn’t agree, he convinced himself that this will all be worth it.

🎬🎬🎬

Baji felt like punching himself.

Baji really hated himself.

The more he stared at the bruises littered on Chifuyu’s face, the more he felt like beating himself up.

Kazutora was cruel.

“I heard you got yourself a new best friend. Chifuyu was it?” Kazutora asked when Baji said he would like to join Valhalla to crush Mikey.

“What about him?” Baji asked.

“…a test of loyalty…

How about beating him up in front of the others? You think you could do that?” Kazutora had asked Baji as if it was the easiest thing to do in the world.

You know what sucked?

The fact that Baji went along with the stupid idea.

On the day Baji was supposed to beat Chifuyu up, he knocked on the older’s door, the older answering the door and immediately beaming.

“I’ve realised! You’re definitely not betraying Toman! You’re probably doing some investigations! Why didn’t you tell me anything? I could’ve helped!” Chifuyu had beamed as they were on their way to Valhalla’s hideout.

A few blocks away from their destinations, Baji stopped walking, hesitating.

But then there’s a hand grabbing his and squeezing it, effectively sending a message.

“It’s gonna be okay.”

Chifuyu had done all that with a sincere and content smile on his lips.

But then a few minutes later, the smile was not seen anywhere.

Chifuyu was unconscious.

Baji hated himself.

Even when he told everyone of his past, he discreetly glanced at Chifuyu.

Baji hated himself.

Even when everyone finally accepted him to join Valhalla, Baji’s mind was filled with Chifuyu.

Was he okay?

Could he stand?

Could he looked at him-

Baji hated himself.

Even when Kazutora said they could just leave Chifuyu on the cold ground, Baji still sneaked in and brought the blonde to his place, Peke J patiently waiting on the corner of the bed.

Baji hated himself.

Carefully and gently, he treated Chifuyu’s injuries, hands trembling because-

-because he just felt so horrible and stupid-

Bai hated him-

“Kei…?”

Baji snapped out of his self loath, immediately turning to Chifuyu who had a small smile on his lips.

“Did you get to join Valhalla?” Chifuyu asked, voice weak.

Baji’s hands trembled as he held Chifuyu’s hands.

“Yeah.” Baji answered short, afraid of breaking down in front of his vice captain.

With a glad smile, Chifuyu beamed, saying a ‘good job!’ as the older male ruffled Baji’s hair softly, eyes droopy and arms heavy.

“Ahhh… I’m super tired today…” Chifuyu murmured, nuzzling into Baji’s hand that was on his cheek.

“Don’t work yourself too hard, okay? I’m gonna… sleep… don’t do anything reckless, Keisuke.”

…

Baji didn’t promise anything that night, something in his gut telling him he should savour the time he had with Chifuyu while he could.

🎬🎬🎬

The next time Chifuyu woke up, Baji was not there anymore.

If Chifuyu didn’t feel the softness of Baji’s hair yesterday, he would’ve believed that it was just a dream.

Chifuyu got up, wincing when he accidentally grazed on a bruise.

Chifuyu smiled when he realised his wounds were taken care of.

“What are you trying to do exactly… Kei?” Chifuyu questioned, yet no answers were received.

Chifuyu stared at the mirror for some time, a soft smile on his lips when he remembered feeling gentle and careful caresses all over his face.

Baji can be so soft sometimes…

“Meow!”

Chifuyu turned to his cat, stared at it for a while before realising he hadn’t fed it yet.

“Peke J!! I’m sorryyy! I was so caught up with Kei that I forgot about youuu!” Chifuyu apologised to the cat who probably didn’t understand him, frantically filling Peke J’s food bowl.

He brushed through Peke J’s fur as the black cat ate, his thoughts wandering back to his ex-captain.

“I should try and understand what’s happening…”

Putting on his fake glasses as if to act like a detective, he took out a notebook and sat on his desk, trying to connect the dots.

…

“KISAKI TETTA!” Chifuyu suddenly said after minutes of silence, slamming his hands on his desk and effectively causing Peke J to jump.

Turning to his cat, Chifuyu pushed his glasses up his nose.

“That night when I found Kei, Mikey was talking to an ex-member of Moebius who is now the third division captain of Toman! Kei had a distraught and thoughtful look when I found him! So he might’ve heard some stuff and concluded that Kisaki has other plans! Bad plans!” Chifuyu summarised his findings.

Peke J stared at him as if he lost his mind.

“Well, I’m right! I know Kei the best-” Chifuyu boasted, yet the proud smile on his lips fell when he recalled the argument they had under the pouring rain the night when Baji had left Toman.

“Maybe you just don’t know me well enough.”

The younger had said it with such ease that-

-that Chifuyu might actually believed him-

Peke J’s mewl pulled Chifuyu out of his thoughts, Chifuyu immediately realising tears were already gathering in his eyes.

“…”

Inhaling sharply, Chifuyu took off the glasses and approached Peke J, scooping the cat in his arms and cuddling the cat on his bed.

Feeling Peke J’s warmth, a tear slipped past his eye.

…

“…you think he means it? That night?” Chifuyu murmured into Peke J’s fur, blinking rapidly to stop his tears.

Once again, he received no answer, only a mewl from his cat.

Chifuyu ended up falling asleep again, waking up a few hours after and immediately tried to find Hanagaki Takemichi.

“He looks like he knows something. So I gotta work with him if I wanna help Kei.” Chifuyu had explained to Peke J, patting the cat’s head before he left that day.

Whatever Baji had thought of him that night, Chifuyu decided to not dwell on it too much.

In the end, he still loved Baji Keisuke after all.

🎬🎬🎬

“Kei is really cool, isn’t he?” Chifuyu asked Takemichi when they first met at the playground.

After an awkward pause from Takemichi, the guy suddenly gasped.

“You’re the dude that was beaten up by Baji-kun!”

…

Ouch.

“We both had it hard yesterday, I guess.” Chifuyu chose to say instead.

Takemichi stared at him for a few moments before taking a seat on the swing next to Chifuyu’s, eyes looking determined for some unknown reason.

So Chifuyu told Takemichi his conclusion, all about Kisaki that he knew about and about the fight between Baji and him that led him to this mess.

By the end of Chifuyu’s recap, Takemichi decided his first question was:

“How does it feel like to be led around by someone younger than you?”

Chifuyu smacked the back of Takemichi’s head.

He would’ve laughed at the question in the past, but the thought of Baji leading him on all this time was not impossible.

It suddenly didn’t sound so funny anymore.

He knew he started doubting every aspect of his and Baji’s relationship. He wondered if all this time was just an act.

The only reason he’s still standing and proudly saying he knew Baji’s the best was because he couldn’t find the reason for the statement ‘if Baji was acting all this time’.

Surely, if Baji was acting all this time, he should have a reason why he’s acting in the first place.

And Chifuyu couldn’t come up with any reasons.

Or maybe he just chose not to-

“Kei’s cool. A very cool captain. Who cares if he’s younger? He has the ability to lead, so I follow.” Chifuyu answered Takemichi’s question, distracting himself from his own depressing thoughts.

Chifuyu hated feeling so lost if it revolved around Baji.

Baji was supposed to be his constant variable.

“Let’s head to Osanai’s place first. He could be our first lead to take down Kisaki Tetta.” Chifuyu rushed, hating how much he’s been sulking the past few days when he could’ve helped Baji a little by gathering information.

He wanted to be useful for his captain.

The two of them walked side by side to Osanai’s workplace, and, Chifuyu was right.

Kisaki’s one nasty guy.

The two of them went to Shinichiro’s grave after that, Mikey had called for Takemichi’s presence.

“Why is the first division vice captain here, but not the captain?” Mikey had asked Takemichi, glancing at Chifuyu for a split second before turning back his attention to Takemichi.

A pause.

“I wanna be the top dog in Toman.” Takemichi proclaimed, voice strong and not wavering.

Chifuyu thought the guy’s got a loose screw in his head.

After that grand claim, Takemichi walked away, Chifuyu immediately following him.

“Can’t you read the room, Takemitchy?” Chifuyu laughed when they’re far enough from Mikey and Draken, amused.

Takemichi shrugged, “Maybe I can’t.”

Chifuyu decided he liked this guy.

Stepping in front of Takemichi’s way, he held out a hand and grinned.

“Let’s make a deal, You’ll help me help Kei, and I’ll help you become the top dog in Toman.”

“You think I can?!”

“Absolutely not.”

Chifuyu laughed again when Takemichi had weakly punched Chifuyu’s chest.

“Though it’s not impossible.” Chifuyu added, encouraging.

At that, Takemichi grinned.

“Sure then!” Takemichi beamed, determined as he shook hands with Chifuyu.

“Then, I’m counting on you, aibo!” Chifuyu grinned, laughing when Takemichi visibly cringed.

“Aibo? As in ‘partner’?” Takemichi asked.

“Yeah. You can call me ‘aibo’ too! We’re like, partners in crime or something! But detectives.” Chifuyu explained, clearly invested in the nickname.

…

“Whatever… Chifuyu.”

“Oi! Call me ‘aibo’! You know how hard it was to decide on what to call you? I’ve been thinking about this for days!” Chifuyu joked.

Obviously it was a joke.

The only thing that had been running around in his head these past few days was a certain black-haired male who had looked so distant from him.

“Sureee, Chifuyu.” Takemichi didn’t seem to pick up on Chifuyu’s change of moods.

Good.

Chifuyu would definitely have broken down if someone had caught on and asked ‘are you okay?’.

Because he’s not.

Not when Baji was ignoring him and acting like they didn’t know each other.

🎬🎬🎬

The day before the ‘battle’.

“Where are we going?” Takemichi asked as they walked up the stairs.

“I want you to meet someone.” Chifuyu said, head too busy thinking to answer Takemichi’s question properly.

This was the first time he’s gonna meet Baji after weeks of just ignoring each other.

He didn’t know if he could stop himself from crying or worrying-

“Baji-kun?!”

Takemichi’s surprised voice pulled Chifuyu out of his thoughts, his heart aching when he saw Baji leaning against the railing, looking as fine as he has always been.

Was he not affected by Chifuyu’s presence at all?

Upon noticing their arrival, Baji stood up straight, tilting his head and mocking.

“Fuyu-san? You came back for more punches?”

Chifuyu hated seeing his captain in Valhalla’s uniform.

It took all of his strength to not go and hug Baji right at the moment and to plead the younger to stop whatever he’s planning.

Chifuyu’s here for him.

Chifuyu will do anything for Baji.

Couldn’t he see?

“You’re just acting as Toman’s spy, aren’t you, Keisuke?” Chifuyu asked, voice determined as he clenched his fists on his sides.

When he saw Baji’s eyebrow twitched slightly, a part of Chifuyu felt relieved.

At least now he knew he was right all along.

He could easily confirm that he knew Baji the best just because of that small action.

Baji’s eyebrow twitched when he’s busted.

It was Chifuyu’s way of finding out if the younger was the one who beat up his seniors or basically anything else.

[“Sooo I heard my seniors got beaten up today. You know, the ones that were mocking me when I hung out with you the other day?”

“…”

“Kei, I can punch them myself! Next time, invite me to the party or something.”

They ended up beating the dudes the second time right on the next day.]

Eyes gleaming with hope, Chifuyu relayed the rest of his information to Baji, the younger listening and keeping quiet during the whole exchange.

“You don’t have to infiltrate Valhalla anymore! We’ve got every piece of evidence to bring Kisaki down.” Chifuyu hated how his voice cracked by the end of his sentence.

Especially in his next sentence.

“Please, Kei. You don’t have to do this alone.” Chifuyu pleaded, not even caring that Takemichi was right beside him, witnessing the whole ordeal.

But he’s just desperate.

Chifuyu’s just desperate.

He missed his captain’s smiles, laughs, jokes, warmth, teases.

Matsuno Chifuyu just missed Baji Keisuke.

A moment of silence passed, Baji looking far off into the distance, as if contemplating.

When Baji spoke, Chifuyu already knew where this was going.

“Fuyu-san. How many times have I told you to stop being so kind to everyone? Even to your enemies-”

“I refuse to accept that you’re my enemy, Kei. You’re my captain. Always is. So stop being a brat and just come back!” Chifuyu raised his voice, tired of this game of chasing they’ve been playing.

Chifuyu’s tired of wondering. Overthinking.

He’s tired.

He just wanted Baji to stay by his side.

Was it that hard?

Was it too selfish?

He just wanted them to stay together.

Was it impossible?

Chifuyu couldn’t really stop his tears from gathering, so he tried his best to stop them from flowing down his cheeks.

Baji had an indescribable stare in his eyes, gazing into Chifuyu’s teary eyes.

Chifuyu couldn’t handle the silence-

“Chifuyu. Can I talk to him one-on-one?” Takemichi asked, breaking the silence as he squeezed one of Chifuyu’s shoulders, comforting.

…

“Sure.” Chifuyu let out, voice breaking as he walked away, leaving some space for those two to talk.

Him staying there wasn’t gonna change Baji’s mind anyway.

He didn’t really mean anything to the other after all.

He couldn’t really hear their conversation, only making out the obvious frown on Baji’s lips, clearly not interested in whatever Takemichi was saying.

Was that really gonna be his last conversation with Baji before the fight?

He hated that thought.

He hated this.

“Just don’t die, Baji-kun.”

Chifuyu felt his heart stop.

Did he hear that right?

Baji’s gonna die?

Was this a cruel joke?

Everything else was tuned out after that, Chifuyu’s hands trembled, tears finally streaming at the thought of Baji…

….Baji dying…

Why did Takemichi say that?

Just imagining Baji’s cold body in his arms was already making Chifuyu’s breath hitched, sobs leaving his lips.

There’s no way…

Baji would never…

“Chifuyu?” He heard Takemichi call out, a hand on his shoulder.

Chifuyu turned to Takemichi, was about to ask Takemichi if what he heard was right when he stopped himself.

Seeing Takemichi’s sad eyes directed at him suddenly made everything so overwhelming.

Was it pitiful? Crying for someone who didn’t even care?

“Let’s go home, yeah?” Takemichi murmured, wiping Chifuyu’s tears away with his thumbs and smiling.

A sad smile.

Chifuyu wanted to see anything but a sad smile.

“Stop crying. You’re 16. And I’m supposed to be the crying one that you should be comforting!” Chifuyu scolded, voice cracking when Takemichi had started crying too.

Takemichi laughed.

“Sorry sorry,

I’m just touched… what you have with Baji-kun over there…

It’s really beautiful.” Takemichi said, smiling.

…

“Isn’t it?” Chifuyu laughed, ignoring how ugly it sounded with the way his throat was dry and voice was hoarse due to crying.

After re-collecting themself, they made their way to Chifuyu’s apartment, planning to come up with a plan to persuade Baji to join Toman back.

“You know… I really like Kei.” Chifuyu sighed out, looking up to the sky as they walked, hands in his pockets.

“I… trust him. Very much. Even if he had beaten me half to death and all, even if he had betrayed Toman,

I trust him.”

Takemichi stared at Chifuyu.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. He’s really the coolest.”

Chifuyu, like other days, ended up thinking about Baji again, though his thoughts were more filled with the possibilities of losing Baji forever.

He won’t let that happen.

He promised himself.

🎬🎬🎬

But promises were meant to be broken anyway.

Chifuyu shook, feeling his tears wetting his cheeks.

How many times has he cried this week?

“Kei… Kei stay with me!” Chifuyu sobbed, cradling Baji’s almost lifeless body in his arms.

No no no.

Baji was only 15 years old-

“Takemitchy.” Baji called out instead, coughing blood.

Where the fuck was the ambulance?! He had called them a few minutes ago?!

He hated how everyone looked so hopeless.

No.

Baji was not supposed to die.

They’re supposed to go on a date together, aren’t they?

On Baji’s 15th birthday.

“You remind me of Shinichiro-san sometimes.” Baji was saying when Chifuyu had stopped panicking.

“So take care of Toman and Mikey for me, yeah?” Baji grinned, looking so bright as if he was not bleeding to death-

“Stop talking, Kei! You’ve lost enough blood already.” Chifuyu said, voice hoarse.

It didn’t even sound like his voice-

Baji’s weak laugh only made Chifuyu cry even more.

Feeling a hand on his cheek, Chifuyu immediately place a hand over Baji’s, the younger wiping away the tears staining Chifuyu’s cheek.

“Fuyu-san… since when are you such a crybaby?” Baji chuckled, caressing Chifuyu’s cheek.

Warmth-

Baji’s warmth-

“Stop talking already, Kei. The ambulance is coming, reserve your energy and focus on breathing-”

“I won’t make it, Fuyu-san.”

He hated it.

Chifuyu hated this.

“No! You don’t decide that! See? You still could talk. You still can see me, yeah? So stop acting like you’ll die-”

It was more like Chifuyu trying to convince himself.

“You can’t die! We- We haven’t gone on any dates yet! Haven’t celebrated your 15th birthday yet. It was only a few days away so… please stay alive…” Chifuyu pleaded desperately, as if it could magically heal Baji.

If only it could.

But it couldn’t.

“Still thinking of dating me? Even after all the things I’ve done? Are you a masochist, Fuyu-san?” Baji laughed, the sound not as lively as it usually sounded.

“We haven’t even kissed yet, Keisuke. So try not to die on me.” Chifuyu childishly said, selfish.

The tears wouldn’t stop streaming down his cheeks.

“You think I could tell my body to work harder for your kisses?” Baji teased.

“Yeah. Could you do that?”

Baji smiled, sadly and it was just not Baji-

“Could’ve done that if I’m in a little bit better state.” Baji answered, keeping his hand on Chifuyu’s cheek.

That’s not the answer Chifuyu’s looking for.

“I- Baji-san said I should take care of you! What should I say when you die? How can I face her? You can’t leave me like this! Not like this! I could never face your mother if you-”

It suddenly dawned on Chifuyu how Baji’s warmth was gradually disappearing.

“Kei Kei Kei. Stay with me, please.” Chifuyu sobbed, holding Baji’s hand tighter.

“Fuyu-san… there’s one thing I kinda regret.”

…

“Not going into your room yesterday and just cuddling with you. Maybe profess my undying love for you too? Smothering your face with kisses? Yeah… I regret not doing those things with you.” Baji murmured, eyes getting droopy as the seconds passed by.

“Kei stop-”

“I have so much to say, but… Crap, I’m hallucinating already.”

Chifuyu didn’t know how he could cry so much-

“Kei, stop it. Stop talking. You have so much to say? Then say them to me after we get you treated, okay? Stop, I mean it.” Chifuyu pressed, worried.

Scared.

Lost.

“And I mean it when I say I love you, Fuyu-san.”

Chifuyu’s heart ached.

“Thank you for everything,

Fuyu-san.”

…

…Huh?

“Kei? Kei? Oi Kei wake up. Not funny Kei. Don’t- don’t sleep on me Kei-”

Who’s he kidding?

Baji’s body has turned cold.

Baji.

Baji.

Keisuke.

Baji Keisuke.

“Baji Keisuke! Don't you dare leave me-”

Why was Chifuyu crying harder?

Didn't he say he wouldn’t let Baji die?

Why why why-

“Keisuke… Baji Keisuke…” it was not even Chifuyu calling out for the older male to wake up.

Chifuyu cried, screaming when Baji’s body went limp in his arms.

His captain-

His best friend-

His everything-

-gone.

Slipping past his arms so easily.

Slipping past him and leaving him so easily.

Gone.

Baji Keisuke was gone.

🎬🎬🎬

A few days had passed since Baji’s funeral.

Chifuyu stayed in his bed, eyes puffy from so much crying.

He’s lost.

He had nothing to follow.

He got nothing to admire, cherish, joked with, have fun with,

Love with.

He hated it.

Feeling so lost.

But then it was the 3rd of November.

It was supposed to be their date.

Finally walking out of his apartment after a few days, he wondered if he should check on Baji’s mother.

Would she hate him? For not protecting her son?

Chifuyu decided he’ll check on her later.

A part of him hoped she’s mad at him.

Because Chifuyu’s tired.

Tired of being mad at himself.

He wanted someone to at least be mad at him.

With a box of peyoung yakisoba in hand, he made his way to the cemetery.

Among the rows of graves, Chifuyu went and visited his captain’s.

He stared at the tombstone for a while, tracing it in hopes of letting reality sink in.

Baji Keisuke was not here anymore.

In silence, Chifuyu ate the peyoung yakisoba and leaving half of it, placing it in front of the tombstone.

Then he cried.

“Cruel, Kei. Really cruel. Saying you love me as your last words? Do you want me to suffer or something?” Chifuyu asked, throat dry.

Cruel.

Baji Keisuke was cruel.

“I don’t have anyone else now. Not people close to me anyway. You’re the only one who’s been there for me right from the start, when I’m still that douchebag that punches people just because I hate people with authority. You’re the one who had seen me at my worst yet still fell for me anyway. You changed me, Kei. And now you’ve left? What did you expect me to do? Move on?”

“It’s not that easy, Kei.” Chifuyu murmured, interlacing his fingers together.

Warmth.

He missed Baji’s warmth.

He missed Baji’s laughs.

He missed Baji’s smiles.

He missed Baji’s affection.

He missed Baji’s jokes.

He missed Baji Keisuke.

But that was obvious.

He hated this.

He hated life without the younger.

“Chifuyu-kun?”

Chifuyu froze at a familiar voice.

Turning around, his tired eyes met another pair of tired eyes, Baji’s mother smiling sadly.

“Tough day, huh?” Baji’s mother said, taking a seat beside Chifuyu.

Chifuyu broke down again.

The blonde bowed, taking Baji’s mother’s hands in his and profusely apologised.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry for everything.

For not taking care of Baji as I promised you to.

For not being there for Baji when he needed me the most.

For not being a better vice captain.

For not helping Baji enough.

For letting Baji slip past his arms.

For not saving Baji.

For being so incompetent-

He stopped talking when he was pulled into a warm, warm embrace.

His heart ached when he realised Baji’s mother was crying too.

“It’s not your fault.”

Baji’s mother didn’t really say it.

But Chifuyu understood.

Chifuyu had always understood.

They cried together, giving each other comfort.

It was in the evening when they left, Chifuyu staring longingly at Baji’s tombstone.

You left so early…

…and yet I still am in love with you.

🎬 END 🎬