Archive of Our Own ^beta

Doubts

Author's Note: Originally published on August 20, 2009

~*~

Over the past few weeks, Hermione's feelings had been in a constant state of flux. She had gone through the same ups and downs two years earlier, when Rose was set to leave for her first year at Hogwarts. Now, her baby boy was just two days away from boarding the train for the first time, and she was having a difficult time coping with the fact that her house would now be empty.

She looked over at her fit husband, giving flying tips to their son, and realized there was one very obvious advantage to an empty household. She flushed at the thought and went into the Burrow to cool down. Molly had thrown a going away party for her numerous grandchildren, but after spending the day in the sun with her extended family, Hermione was ready for a bit of quiet time indoors. As she left the kitchen, she spotted her niece, Lily, sitting quietly in the living room, staring blankly into space.

The look of anxiety on the flame-haired girl's face was one she had seen in the mirror many times. It was far different from Lily's usually talkative personality, a trait which reminded Hermione of a younger Ginny. However, she couldn't deny that over the past couple of years, the girl had, surprisingly, begun to exhibit a few characteristics common to her closest uncle. She was already starting to sprout like a weed; Hermione was sure she would be the tallest of the Potter clan. Unfortunately, she had also started displaying outward signs of the self-doubt and lack of confidence that Ron had wrestled with for most of his life.

Hermione cautiously entered the living room and sat down across from her niece, breaking the girl out of her thoughts. "Is everything alright, Lily?"

Lily nodded absentmindedly, but Hermione could tell that something was bothering her.

"I remember what it was like, first going to Hogwarts," she started, "I was incredibly nervous but also excited. It was difficult leaving my parents to enter this whole new world, and I was scared that I wouldn't fit in. I tried so hard to prove myself."

"I'm scared and nervous, and I'll miss my mum and dad, but it's not only that." Lily whispered, before catching her aunt's encouraging gaze. "Everyone expects so much because of who my parents are. James is popular, and he even made the house team last year. And Al, well, people are always interested in Harry Potter's son, the Slytherin. I'm none of those things, how am I supposed to live up to that? I'm not special like any of my brothers, I'm just annoying little sister Lily."

Hermione reached across and squeezed the girl's hand. "No one is expecting you to be anything other than you. Your brothers have had time to start figuring out who they are as individuals, and you will too. I know your parents are very proud of you."

"I guess." Lily agreed reluctantly.

"Your uncle Ron was the same way growing up, he always felt overshadowed by his brothers, and even by your mum and dad. He still feels it, occasionally."

"What?" Lily asked in shock. "But everyone loves Uncle Ron, he's so funny. He won that special award in school, the Quidditch and House Cups, he was Keeper and a Prefect, a war hero, an Auror… he even has his own chocolate frog card!"

"Yes, but he was too busy comparing himself with the people around him to really appreciate everything he had achieved on his own. I don't want to see you go down the same path of doubting yourself. Just because your brothers and cousins have accomplished certain things at school, doesn't mean that you have to follow their example. Just be yourself and see where things go from there; don't worry about what other people think."

Hermione paused for a second and gave the girl a grin. "Goodness, I'm starting to sound like Luna."

The two of them shared a laugh, but it was short-lived when Lily gave her aunt a pained look.

"What if I can't make any friends, Aunt Hermione? I've always spent time with Hugo, my brothers, and my cousins, but this will be different. What if no one likes me?"

"I think I can answer that." Ron's deep timbre startled them both. He stepped into the room and sat down next to his wife.

"First off, you are half-Weasley, so everyone will like you." He let out a laugh and continued on. "Seriously, Lily, don't fret over it too much, you never know who you will meet and become friends with until you get out there. I never imagined that I would ever meet your dad, let alone become his best friend. I also met Uncle Neville on that first train ride to Hogwarts, and he's been like another member of the family."

"Aren't you forgetting someone, Uncle Ron?"

He leaned forward with a mischievous look in his eye, covered the side of his mouth with his hand and mock whispered, "I also met this one girl on the train; she was a right little know-it-all. I reckon meeting her was," he leaned back on the settee and threw his arm around Hermione's shoulder, "the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Oh, Ron." She slapped him playfully on the thigh, but couldn't hide the blush that arose in her cheeks from his comment. Lily made a quick face; she was used to the open affection between her aunt and uncle.

Ron leaned over and kissed his wife on the cheek before standing back up to exit the room. "Just remember, Lily, that friendship is something that will happen when you meet the right people. And if they don't like you for who you are, they aren't worth the trouble."

After watching Ron walk away, Hermione once again turned to Lily. "Your uncle is right. I had my fair share of problems making friends; in fact, your uncle treated me horribly at first. But look at how things turned out, I met the right people, my two best friends, on that train ride to Hogwarts, so who knows who you'll meet?"

A look of optimism blossomed on the young girl's face at the possibility that she might be a few days away from meeting someone who could be a lifelong friend. She stood up and hugged her aunt tightly.

"You know that we love you and that we'll always be here for you-your parents and the rest of the family. We'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Aunt Hermione. Thanks for the talk and everything… I know I can always count on you."