Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Down this sidewalk is our hero sitting down homeless a dropout and a failure although high hopes for his future confidence pumping through his veins even after his boyfriend broke up with him and he got fired and became homeless he wasn't phased.

Meanwhile a girl was walking down the same sidewalk as happy as could be, and how could she not? she had a loving family including henchmen who she treated as family, besties who were always by her side, and anything that would and did make her happy except... someone to be her lover. She had a boyfriend a year ago but things didn't work out well for him.

Our soon to be hero noticed too suspicious men walking through the alleyway both wearing blue coats although one was unbuttoned and the other was, the one with the buttoned coat had cloth on his head and presumably his eye and a red rope around his waist.

"Ok paul we should spot her riiight... there." The man with the eyepatch told the guy with the unbuttoned coat.

Right after they left our hero followed after them seeing a pretty sight a lady with long red hair and a beautiful dress and those... eyes the point is he thought she was pretty but he had no chance interacting with her at all, not after two people leaving him, but he saw her beauty nonetheless.

Catching up with reality he saw the two men in blue coats approaching her

"Hello there young lady you seem lost." The Paul guy said to her innocently.

"Oh no I'm pretty sure that I'm on the right track I think." The lady in red said at first sounding sure but then into doubt.

"Well then I guess that this will be easier than I thought." The eyepatch man said.

Soon after he pinned her to the wall of an abandoned apartment building.

"What the-" the girl said in confusion.

Our hero watching just couldn't let this happen to an innocent person so he looked for weapons that he could use. A gun no he had no ammo, a knife no too predictable, a mic that was the real deal.

He grabbed the microphone and took to the men in blue.

The girl was just surprised that two men had pinned her to a brick wall and pointed a knife to her throat.

"Ok pat I'll get the loot." The man with the white x on his red shirt said to the man with an eyepatch.

"BEEEEP BOOP!" a mysterious voice yelled out.

All three of them looked towards the figure that seemed to be small.

"Beep bop boop bep." The figure... said? It was more like random noises.

"What the..." the pat man said lowering his knife.

Soon a black object came at his head and hit him in his good eye.

"Gah son of a-" he said stopping for some reason or another.

"Run away!" The Paul guy said after nearly getting hit.

They started running from the shadowy figure.

"Uh, thank you for helping me." She said nervously working her way towards him.

She saw him he had, well some style to him a red hat, a red cross sign on his white shirt, red shoes with white laces, and cyan hair.

"Beep boop?" He asked in a questioning tone.

"My name is girlfriend what's yours?" She asked sweetly

"Beep." He said sounding like a video game.

"Boyfriend, that sounds like a lovely name." Girlfriend said sounding sweet as honey.

Soon boyfriend and girlfriend walked down the sidewalk together feels something between both of them...
Love. Dear god that's cheesy!

Chapter Text

Terry and Jerry were driving their boss's favorite limo with their boss inside it...
DADDY DEAREST.

Some say he's a horrible demon others know him as an awesome rockstar who quit for reasons unknown they knew him as an overprotective parent who bossed them around and was horrible with names.

"Terry can you wait to see my daughter again tonight?." Daddy dearest said to his henchman Terry who was his favorite henchman and who was driving.

"Well she must be excited to see you back home so late sir." Terry told him ready to go home.

They soon made it to the dearest household eager to enter for their own reasons.

Terry was tired and wanted to sleep that night, Jerry wanted to see his friends again, and daddy dearest was excited to see his daughter possibly with one of her friends like Carol after all her mother was on tour with Larry and Carlos for another week so he was eager to see her again.

Boyfriend and girlfriend had been dating for a few weeks now and it's been going strong boyfriend knew her favorite pizza topping, video game, and her favorite drink.

"You know we've known each other for a few weeks you can talk to me without beeps and boops."

"Beep ba?" He asked her.

"Yes really I won't mind." She said reassuring him.

"Uhhhhh... ok I guess, I haven't met your parents." Boyfriend said in normal words.

Girlfriend was shocked when he said that.

"Well that's for the best BF." She said nervously and knowing what her father would do if he found out.

"Say why do you beep anyways, is it like a language or..." boyfriend put his index finger on her mouth as she said it.

"There's no particular reason honestly, I just do it to get out of conversation." He said showing trust in her.

"Well then I wanted to show you something" girlfriend said with a strange mistivous look in her eyes.

She soon pulled out a twister board game.

Terry finally unlocked the door for daddy dearest and opened it, he looked at Jerry who looked exactly like him pink skin, open jacket and baggy pants, and two pointy horns. He was like looking in a mirror a pathetic one that should've never been created in the first place.

They all entered and Terry just laid on the couch just as Jerry entered the basement to see his "friends" poor ignorant fool, daddy dearest finally entered.

"Ah, good too be back eh Terry? After all I signed so many records, CDs, and even cassettes." He said sounding like king of the world witch was objectively true.

"But sir there were only three people that each who had one of the three things you had, and after that you cried in the car for 20 minutes?" Jerry said and the room went silent.

Terry looked at Jerry who had Barry and Gary to his right and left respectively, soon they ran downstairs back to the basement.

Daddy dearest's eyes were pure black as he still smiled.

Soon after mere seconds he grabbed Jerry by the neck.

"Damn it Jerry can't I have one day where you aren't the cause of one of my problems?" He yelled with red glowing dots in his eyes.

Soon he just ranting at Jerry for so many things until he heard something... his daughter.

Well he did it boyfriend had won... in twister so what was next?

"Well looks like you won, guess you deserve something." She said getting in her bed.

Boyfriend knew what to do, take a dive.

Just as he jumped out of his clothes the door broke open and girlfriend was gone.

"Well Well Well, what do we have here?" An unfamiliar voice asked him.

Soon after he looked up at the ceiling to see girlfriend being held by a tall man with purple skin and hair the shape of a crescent moon.

"Sweetheart may I ask you one simple question?" The purple man asked girlfriend sounding as calm as you can when you find out a man who you never knew about was in the same room as the person who meant the whole world to you.

"Yes." Girlfriend said sounding like she knew what would happen now, and it would not be pretty to watch or hear.

"WHO IN THE SAM EVERLOVING HELL IS THAT PUNY CRETIN!" He yelled with the fury of all the Jurassic park movies and hell combined.

"Beep bop." Boyfriend said surprised by the giant towering over him.

Daddy dearest noticed the noise of the small blue boy and took another look at him.

"Wha- what was that? Is that like some sorta language?" He asked wondering why he made those noises.

"Beep di ba." He said sounding like a microwave in underwear and that's what he was a micro human making beeps in his underwear.

"daughter of mine how long has this been going on?" He asked girlfriend.

"A few weeks now." She said worried for her boyfriends safety.

"Well then, so kid you wanna date my daughter?" The dearest dad asked the boyfriend.

"Beep boop bop!" He responded confidently.

"Hm, determined eh, Well then choose your fight." Daddy dearest said knowing that all odds were rigged in his favor.

"Bap!" Boyfriend yelled.

"I don't understand you, just speak English!" The demon man yelled losing his patience.

"He wants a rap battle dad." Girlfriend said quietly.

"Oh a rap battle with me daddy dearest."

The small blue boy gasped in pure Amazement.

"Beep boo?" He said in pure amazement.

"Daughter what did he say?" The dad asked.

"He's a big fan of your music dad." Girlfriend said trying to lighten up the mood and possibly get her dad to not seal him in eternal torment and pain.

"Hmm, well then I guess since he's a fan I'll give him a small bit of time to prepare for what I've got in store." He said sounding genuinely surprised by someone liking his old songs and music.

He snapped his fingers and suddenly all three of them were in a stage daddy said one the left boyfriend on the right and girlfriend sitting on speakers.

"All right kids just prepare yourself for battle, uh... daughter what's his name?" Daddy dearest asked realizing that he never asked for a name.

"Boyfriend that's the name sir." Boyfriend answered with pure confidence.

"Ok then, sweetie why don't you just tell him how things work around here." Daddy said in a gentle tone.

"Ok daddy I'll do what I can." Girlfriend said thinking that they'll get along better than she thought.

The tall purple demon snapped and in a puff of smoke the two nineteen year olds were in a stage fully dressed as if it was a few seconds ago that they were about to lose something.

"Ok boyfriend my dad's a pro at this stuff so you need to know how my family's rap battles work." Girlfriend said sounding confident that he could win this.

"Ok show me the ropes please." Boyfriend said as confident as her.

(Ok so I can not make lyrics to anything, so instead I'll just skip over it since I'm pretty sure that we all know what happens unless you as a reader have any suggestions then I'm all ears)

*after tutorial*

"Ok I'm back daughter, how was your last time seeing him alone and safe?" The ex rock star asked.

"Trust me sir this won't be the last." Boyfriend answered for her.

"Well then prepare for the battle." Daddy said after saying well then for the third time.

*after bopeebo*

"Heh, you actually got a little bit of talent in ya do you kid?" The purple demon asked.

"Ha you bet sir." Boyfriend responded with the definition of feeling confident.

"So you may know rap, but can you beatbox?" The dearest asked the blue haired boy.

he just stood in silence, daddy dearest took this as a no.

"So I'll take that as a no, I guess I'll give you a lesson, and a wonderful last few moments." He said sounding at first like a kind man but after the offer of beatbox lessons his kindness became spite.

*After fresh*

"Ok that's officially it you are done I tried being nice but now boy I will tear your soul out straight from your body!" He yelled.

Soon Jerry and Garry came in.

"Sir I think you need to calm dow-urk!" Jerry said as daddy dearest grabbed him by his neck.

Soon after mere seconds Jerry dissipated into dust with only his glasses and his clothes falling to the floor.

He soon glanced at Garry and he was outta there.

"So kid I'm not going to ask you again, you wanna date my daughter?" He asked with the heat of hell in his eyes.

"Yeah, I wanna kiss my wonderful girlfriend." He said knowing that he's going to win, and he was determined.

*after dad battle*

And he did not too big of a surprise.

"Bye dad!" Girlfriend waved goodbye to her father innocent and looking forward to dinner at Wendy's.

No I can't let him date her daddy dearest thought, but what could he do choke him to death clearly to his daughter no, she's not that dumb. But what about a merc or an assassin just anything that would kill him for money after all he had a lot of it.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend was ready for a date with girlfriend and to meet one of her friends.

Meanwhile Derry, Perry, and Garry were doing girlfriend's makeup and her hair.

Although her father was looking in a book with Terry full of assassins, bounty hunters, and mercenaries.

"Hmm, Terry I'm wondering who too hire." He said looking into the book.

"Well sir just choose blind folded." Terry told him hearing girlfriend hum.

Soon after they and by they I mean girlfriend's dad chose.

Meanwhile Darnell carried a bunch of components for a new weapon that he was building. It wasn't the first time or the last time, hell he got himself banned from 17 countries in Europe and the entirety of south America.

"Ok Nene I'm boutta make you something special for ya" he said eyeing Nene his knife wielding accomplice.

"..." she just stood there leaning on the wall of the bar and just continued to balance a knife on her index finger.

"Ok Nene I get it, I'm just excited to build this shit and use it to help people kick the bucket and get us money, or just sell it to a corrupt government and then pick and you kill them and we get more bucks." Darnell explained in extreme detail.

"..." Nene looked up at Darnell and tilted her head.

"Yeah come to think about it where is Pi-" Darnell said getting cut off in one of his sentences.

Soon after pico walked in and threw down a brief case on the floor his sweater covered in blood along with his knuckles.

"Dude we... were just." Darnell said cutting himself off.

"*hack koff* dude could you hand me a cold one?" Pico asked with some scrappy doo like voice.

Darnell instantly knew what was going on with him, soon after the request he was handed some good stuff.

"Thanks for that, good God they kept coming." Pico said sounding relieved that he was home.

*ring ring* the phone rang out.

"Hold that thought pico, yes Darnell incorporated your trusty weapon and merc dealers how may I help you?" Darnell said sounding like a cheery salesman who was in his twenties.

"Yes may I speak to Hank J. Wimbleton please?" The voice asked him on the phone.

"Sorry he's somewhere in Nevada right now but we got the next best-" Darnell said before his phone got yanked.

"Gimme that!" Pico yelled as he yanked the trinket out Darnell's hand.

"Bitch." Darnell mumbled under his breath.

"Look what do ya want pal I just got home and btw hank ain't with us at all, so what is it drugs, sabotage, or murder?" Pico asked the man.

"Oh I'm terribly sorry I just needed the best assassin around but if you want to take it I promise I've got riches beyond your imagination." The voice said.

"Fine but if it's a horde or something like that then I'm out." Pico answered.

"Oh no quite the contrary he's small and the weakest little shitbag in the universe." He answered.

"Well then Darnell start taking notes we're drinking wine out the bottles." Pico said.

Boyfriend knocked on the door to the dearest household to be answered by a henchman who looked exactly like Jerry.

"Come on in girlfriend is waiting for you." He said with a smooth voice that sounded like a comedian.

Straight after he sat on the leather couch and looked around.

"Boyfriend you're here!" Girlfriend yelled out waving.

"Thanks for letting him in Barry." She said after giving boys a kiss on the cheek.

Just as Barry was about to answer girlfriend's father came out the door to the kitchen.

"Oh boyfriend, you're here." He said sounding sweet.

"Well Sweetheart you and your boyfriend should get out of here and get on your date." He said taking them outside and sounding excited about it.

This gave boyfriend a little feeling of hope that her family is one step closer to accepting him.

Sooner or later they got to the train station close to NG HQ.

"So, she's meeting us here?" Boyfriend asked.

"Yep she should be a few tracks that way." Girlfriend answered holding his hand.

*BANG* a bullet barely missed boyfriend's leg

"Well ell well, finally found you you blue haired... rat?" A familiar voice said.

"P-Pico is that you?" Boyfriend asked as he turned around.

The two just stood there in the open until Pico spoke up.

"AAAAAAAAYYYY!" he yelled out pointing finger guns.

"Aaayy." Boyfriend responded weakly.

"Who's this boyfriend?" Girlfriend asked not knowing anything about the situation.

"Girlfriend this is Pico my uh... ex, Pico this is Girlfriend my girlfriend." Boyfriend introduced them.

"Huh, Boyfriend I didn't know you had the worst taste of women." Pico joked trying to make girlfriend cry.

Soon after Girlfriend started sobbing.

"Say, you're still wanting to be a rapper  right?" Pico asked looking at his gun.

"Yeah I still am and I'm gonna be the best rapper around." Boyfriend answered with pure confidence.

"Well if that's the case how about we do a round before our target gets here." Pico said.

"Ok I can go a few rounds." Boyfriend responded pulling out his mic.

Pico soon after grabbed his gun and shot it at the sky and caught his microphone in midair.

"Let's do this!" They said in unison.

*after pico* (still open to suggestions)

"Wow I can't believe you won, especially since you barely had support from the idiot on the boxes." Pico said looking at Girlfriend smugly.

"Why are you so mean to me?" Girlfriend asked sobbing.

"Hey I ain't being mean I'm being philly nice." Pico said spinning his guns.

"Oh boy here we go." Darnell said rolling both his eyes and a joint he also gave an extra one to Nene.

"Pico please stop being philly nice to my Girlfriend please." Boyfriend said consoling Girlfriend.

"What is that anyway?" Girlfriend asked wi
ping tears off herself

"Don't get him started." Boyfriend and Darnell said in unison sounding like if they've experienced this so many times before.

"Here I'll explain with a rap song." Pico said as Boyfriend, Darnell, and Nene all groaned at once.

Darnell handed Nene a joint they needed something to pass the the time.

*after philly nice*

Pico and Boyfriend had started talking about how they've been doing for a while.

Unbeknownst to the five of them the person who arranged this was not too far.

"What are they doing?" The dearest demon asked.

"Well the ginger isn't killing the blue haired kid sir" Jerry said.

Terry face palmed and slid it down.

"I can see that Jerry I was looking!" Terry's boss said angered even more.

The ex rockstar pulled out his phone and called Darnell.

"Hello, Darnell here eager to sell, protect and kill." The manager said his jingle.

"Yes I see that you aren't killing the target and are instead rapping him." The dearest dad said.

Darnell had heard that last part and looked behind the speakers to see a purple car with 3 men 2 that looked exactly the same and the the third one was most likely the boss.

"Hello?" The phone said as Well as the man in the car asked.

"Yeah I'm on it" Darnell said hanging up and looking at Pico and Boyfriend.

He really didn't want to bring the news to Pico even if he was getting paid he felt out of character for a minute and contemplated his choices, until he decided to give Pico the news.

"Hey dude I need to tell you something."

"Sure, what is it?" Pico asked a strange looking Darnell.

Darnell whispered to Pico everything he was told by their client, unfortunately Pico can't handle surprises that Well.

"YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT THIS BUTTERFACE'S DAD HIRED US TO KILL MY EX BECAUSE THEY'RE DATING!" Pico yelled so loud that even daddy dearest could hear it.

"Pico please stop insulting my girlfriend." Boyfriend said firmly.

"Fuck that bitch why are you even dating her she's fucking terrible she's ugly, stupid, and she doesn't even care about you!" Pico yelled, anger showing that even with his British tooth gap and freckles.

"Pico are you, jelous?" Boyfriend asked looking at his ex boyfriend.

He chose the wrong set of words.

Pico loaded his gun and pointed it straight to Boyfriend's head.

"Time to finish the job." Pico said the top of his face shadowed.

"Uh dude you-" Darnell got cut off by a gunshot near the foot.

"SHIT!" Nene yelled out.

Soon everyone fell silent

*After Blamed*

Pico pointed his gun at Boyfriend again and fired.

He missed not even getting his shoulder.

"Wha-" Boyfriend was cut off by Pico.

"Play dead." Pico said quietly.

"Oh the pain, oh lord forgive me for my sins, what have I got in store in the afterlife." Boyfriend said as he fell to the ground.

"Boyfriend no!" Girlfriend yelled out in sadness.

Darnell looked behind the speakers and gave Pico and Nene a thumbs up.

"Ok dude you can get up now." Pico said calmly as if he didn't just go crazy.

Boyfriend got up in Girlfriend's arms.

"BOYFRIEND YOU'RE ALIVE!" Girlfriend yelled as she nuzzled him.

"Don't you scare me like that again,oh who am I kidding I can't stay mad at you." Girlfriend said holding him like a plushie and giving him kisses on his cheek.

"Sorry about going overboard, I just... want to be friends can you forgive me?"Pico asked looking flustered.

Boyfriend looked at Girlfriend and back at Pico.

"Sure man we can be buds" Boyfriend said moving his hand.

Soon they parted ways with each other, Pico and Nene by jumping on a train, Darnell went to collect the payments, while Boyfriend was with Girlfriend off to meet a best friend, and Pico and Nene were off too the bar.

Soon Pico got a call from his ol pal

"Hey Pico you know that old church by the donut shop, apparently there's some people there one who I met and was a pretty cool guy.

"Huh cool I guess." Pico responded.

"Finally that blue haired brat is gone." Daddy dearest said sitting in his chair.

"Aww I thought he was ok."Jerry said innocently.

"Terry, Stewart put Jerry in the blender." Daddy dearest said closing his eyes.

Boyfriend was with Girlfriend to meet one of her friends and soon they made it to meet her...

Carol.

Chapter Text

*Earlier today before week 2*

Girlfriend sat on her bed texting her bestie Carol, they were just telling each other about their weeks until Girlfriend mentioned that she had met someone.

The convention went on for a while actually but it came from a close when she agreed to meet with Boyfriend in the train station.

"Daddy is it ok if Carol and I meet up." Girlfriend asked probably knowing that the answer was no.

"Of course sweetheart you can even bring that Boyfriend kid of yours." He said sweetly as a cinnamon roll.

"I infact think that Perry, Garry, and Darry should do your makeup.

Girlfriend wondered why her father was being this nice while talking about her boyfriend.

Boyfriend was talking with his best friend and adopted brother Ritz on the phone, it was actually one of the last things he had with his debt.

"So I'm hearing that you have a Girlfriend dude." Ritz said as he munched on presumably cheese dipped in peanut butter.

"Yeah I was so close to scoring last base." Boyfriend said disappointed.

"Hey sometimes you have to wait until the right moment." He informed Boyfriend.

"Yeah, Yeah I know, I know but still we are dating and it's going well." Boyfriend said as he exited the wearhouse he stayed in.

"By the way where are you?" Boyfriend asked looking fly for a date.

"France oui oui." Ritz said trying to sound fancy.

"Ok then, love you lil bro." Boyfriend said.

"Heh love you too bud." Ritz said softly trying to still sound cool.

Boyfriend kept walking around town until he heard a familiar voice behind him.

"Yo little man what's up." He said sounding chill as always.

"Bop" Boyfriend said greeting his pal Garcello.

Garcello was a pal of Boyfriend who was real chill and friendly, he'd usually buy Boyfriend small fries from McDonald's a lot or buy him a snack from the gas station while he bought smokes.

"I see your well dressed more than usual what's the special occasion." He asked taking a puff from a cigarette.

"Beep boop skabidy bep." Boyfriend beeped and bopped.

"A date huh, good for you little man." He said puffing out smoke.

"Beep bop." Boyfriend said waving goodbye for now.

"Later *ack* little man!" he said coughing a little bit.

*after Pico's week*

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had been walking for a while holding each others hands.

"So should your friend be here?" Boyfriend asked.

"Yeah but we can still stay for a while honey bee." Girlfriend answered calling Boyfriend a cute name.

"Girlfriend is that you?" A disembodied voice asked.

"Carol you're here!" Girlfriend yelled running to the fog.

"Hey bestie." The voice said.

The fog soon settled revealing the figure

"Oh, Carol this is my boyfriend, Boyfriend." Girlfriend introduced him to her best friend.

"He's mad short not gonna lie." She said messing with him.

"Beep bop." He said.

"Uh, anyway I've been working on some music." Girlfriend's bestfriend said.

"Do it bop though?" Girlfriend asked handing Carol a mic.

"Beep skappity." Boyfriend beeped.

Carol was just confused.

"Excuse us for one sec snookums." Girlfriend said patting Boyfriend's head.

They whispered to each other for about two minutes.

"Ok lovey are you ready." Girlfriend said as Carol cringed and most likely lost a brain cell.

"Beep!"

*after Carol-roll*

"Heh that song was fire right?" Carol asked.

"Bo beep" Boyfriend beeped.

"Hey have you heard of Megan Thee Stallion?" Carol asked tapping her mic.

"Bee?" Boyfriend asked.

"Oh snookie bear you'll love this." Girlfriend Said.

"Girlfriend please stop being cute to your boyfriend, I'm sorry but I'm losing brain cells out of cringe." Carol said rubbing her temples.

"Oh sorry." Girlfriend said embarrassed as hell.

"Ok let's get this show on the road!" Carol exclaimed.

*after body*

"Shit went hard right?" Carol asked smileing.

"Uhh, are you open to criticism?" Boyfriend asked now at least feeling comfortable talking near Girlfriend's bestfriend.

"Well I guess I'll be open for some." Carol said.

Boyfriend breathed in and then breathed out.

"That shit was ass, and it wasn't my style." Boyfriend said.

"Shut the fuck up, you're literally a fucking toddler baby bitch can't even wipe his own ass with those big ass hands, and you can't bend your knees cause they up to your nuts, bigfoot called he wanted to congratulate you for beating the world record of largest feet!" Carol yelled insult after insult.

"Carol calm down jeez." Girlfriend said scratching her head.

Carol soon signed and rubbed her head.

"Sorry, say I gotta get going one more song do?" Carol asked.

"B eep" Boyfriend beeped shaking his head.

*After boogie*

"Ok I gotta go my pets are probably starving." Carol said sounding concerned.

"Aww, maybe we should go golfing sometime soon." Girlfriend said picking up a calmed Boyfriend.

"Alright I'll be seeing you later Girlfriend." Carol said giving a thumbs up.

Carol arrived home to see what she expected, her house mate Sunday sleeping on the couch with a cat on top of them also sleeping, and a dog jumping on her.

Sunday's cat Luci was just a baby and a jerky one at that, Carol's dog Francis however was a sweetheart.

She sat on the chair and turned on the news just to get a chance to hear something good not a civil war in Utah, a zombie apocalypse in great Britain, and the absolute hellscape in Nevada just hoping that something good will happen.

Girlfriend and Boyfriend had walked back to Girlfriend's home together.

"Bye snookums!" Girlfriend yelled after kissing him on the cheek.

"Bye." Boyfriend said watching as Terry welcomed her in.

But as that happened a limo came up and he saw...

Jerry carrying a McDonald's mcflurry.

But after he said hi to Jerry he heard him say something while being afraid.

After he got off the dearest property he saw some smoke, green smoke.

He saw his pal Garcello smoking with a McDonald's bag next to him on a bench.

"Beep" Boyfriend said looking up at him.

"What's up little man." Garcello said eating a big Mac.

Boyfriend was a vegetarian but didn't go too hard on others for eating meat, he didn't like McDonald's meat especially but the fries were good.

"So how did it go?" Garcello asked as he handed him a small fry and some tea.

"Bop bee skibity bop mdada." Boyfriend said eating some fries afterwards

"That's nice." Garcello said not really knowing what Boyfriend said but listened to the tone and carfully responded.

Soon they talked about the days they had until Boyfriend finished his fries, afterwards they went out in separate ways once more.

Daddy dearest had exterminated that pest his daughter called a boyfriend, he also just paid the mercs.

His happiness was cut short by Jerry carrying his McDonald's shake.

"Sir Boyfriend is still alive and well!" Jerry yelled panicking.

Daddy dearest had just took a look at him and started laughing as Terry checked the camera footage and indeed saw that Boyfriend was alive.

"Uh, sir he's not joking." Terry said to his boss.

Dearest had started watching the footage and indeed saw that Boyfriend was alive and well.

A still face kept on his face.

Jerry decided he'd give him a milkshake and carfully placed it.

"Jerry, this is... TOO COLD!" He yelled as he hit Jerry in the face with it.

Soon the cellphone buzzed and the henchmen with their boss looked at it and a devilish smile went across double D's face as it read.

Hey honey I'm coming home from the tour next week make sure to let gf know when you can-MM.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had woken up to a phone buzz on his chest, as he woke up he read the number out to be Girlfriend, so he decided to answer the call for her.

"Hello?" Boyfriend asked sounding tired.

"Boyfriend, I have a problem and it really puts you in danger." Girlfriend said panicking.

"Ok I'll be there in a few!" Boyfriend said

After the trip to Girlfriend's house he was greeted by two henchmen with jackets and flattops on his left and right sides.

"Beep boop." Boyfriend said with butterflies in his stomach.

"Hello Mr. Boyfriend Ms. Girlfriend is in the living room waiting for you." The one on his left said.

Boyfriend walked in looking at pictures on the wall of Girlfriend's family.

"Uh, Girlfriend you wanted me?" Boyfriend said scratching the back of his head.

"Well well well, if it isn't the Boyfriend or as I call you the friend that wants to get in my wonderful, innocent daughter's dress." A familiar horrible voice said.

Oh no not this asshole. Boyfriend thought as he turned around to the red eyed, purple skinned demonic figure.

"Beep boop pop." Boyfriend said in monotone voice trying to get out of the conversation.

"Oh what's wrong looking for your little girlfriend?" Double D asked perfectly imitating Girlfriend's voice.

Boyfriend just didn't pay attention like with bullies in high school and just wanted to know where Girlfriend was at this time.

"BOYFRIEND!!!!!" He heard his significant other yell.

Soon as he looked a red blur wrapped it's arms around him in a warm familiar way.

"Beep" Boyfriend said comforted by it.

"Daddy why is he here?" Girlfriend asked clearly confused about this.

"Well sweetie I called him to here because your mother is coming from the tour." He said as a henchman separated them.

"Oh, ok well I guess we gotta go see her." Girlfriend said as she went to one of the limos

Soon as they got out the door a limo came into the house's driveway, it was another limo.

Two henchmen came out one who looked different and had a gold tooth.

"Larry, Carlos you're back!" Girlfriend yelled in excitement.

"Hey how's our boss's favorite little girl?" The one presumably named Larry asked.

"Great but even better if we can see Mommy!" Girlfriend yelled in pure excitement.

"Alright I'm sure she'll love to see you too." The one with a gold tooth presumably named Carlos.

Soon all the henchman went to greet the other two.

And so they were off to leave.

Although Boyfriend was on his way he wanted to spite Daddy Dearest and had an idea too.

After all the henchman went to the limos he put his hand on his girlfriend's shoulder and lowered it as he got out the door.

"NOOOOOO!" The father yelled as he ran to him, But Boyfriend closed the door in his face.

After a while he and Girlfriend were on the freeway with the rest of the henchmen on another limo.

"So babe could you tell me about your mom?" Boyfriend asked leaning on Girlfriend.

"Well where to start, she's a popular popstar, she has a thing for makeup, and she's my mom." Girlfriend listed three things about her mom.

"Huh that's pretty cool I guess, say am I going to rap battle her for your affection too?" Boyfriend asked holding her head.

"Yeah but don't worry she's not like dad to where she'll hire hitmen but will screw with you from time to time" Girlfriend said only building Boyfriend's confidence.

"Well that's reasuring." Boyfriend said smiling.

Straight after he said that they lovers were grabbed by two henchmen

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled wondering what was going on.

"Yo kids double M is a few minutes away we should be there in a sec so we got ourselves ready." Carlos said as a small limo came out with Girlfriend's boom boxes.

As a Red light came on Girlfriend got on her speakers.

"Y'know Carlos Boyfriend is a good rapper too right?" Girlfriend asked Carlos knowing that could have him make a quick detour.

"Well I-" he said as he noticed Terry nodding to the offer.

"*Ahem* I guess he could use a little refresher and plus your mother is a busy lady." He said brushing back his hair.

"Beep boop skibity." Boyfriend said in confirming beeps.

"Well then let's rock!" Carlos yelled exited for the rap battle.

*After refresher*

"Well kid I guess you're not that bad you may actually beat her mom." Carlos said as they arrived at the airport.

The watched as two henchmen went in And they waited until it happened.

The two henchmen came out with a curvy silhouette.

"Mom's here!" Girlfriend yelled shaking Boyfriend with excitement.

Soon the silhouette revealed itself to be the popstar sensation Mommy Mearest.

Boyfriend could tell simply by the purple skin and red and black outfit, and also because his dad loves her music.

A few seconds passed until she went up to the limo they were standing on.

"Mom you're back and looking great." Girlfriend said hugging her mom.

"Oh sweetie your looking great too I must say." She said ruffling her daughter's hair.

As soon as she looked at the limo she saw it a small stuffed... Human.

"Uh, sweetie did your father get you... that?" She asked looked in disgust.

Girlfriend looked behind herself and went to grab him.

"Beep." It said as she picked it up.

Mommy was going to throw up.

"Mom this is my boyfriend Boyfriend." She said putting him down.

"Boop bep bee." Boyfriend waved at her.

"Oh thank Satan it's only a small human." Her mother mumbled

She soon realized what her daughter said boyfriend.

"Ok sweetheart I see that you have a, miget with you at the moment." She said agitated and snapping at the henchmen to 'hype it up' and got on the hood of the limo whilst Boyfriend got help from another henchman while girlfriend got on floating speakers.

"Well uh, Boyfriend I guess I'll go easy on you for now." She said making a devilish grin

"You can do it babe!"

"Beep!"

*After 'satin panties'*

They all made it to the freeway with the henchmen still intact and dancing.

"Well you certainly have more skill than I thought you would." She said smirking.

"Uh thank you ma'am." Boyfriend said asking Terry for a bottle of water.

"Oh, I didn't know that my daughter was dating a gentleman." The mom said flirtatiously.

"Mom did you, did you seriously flirt with my boyfriend?" Girlfriend said understandably angry.

Boyfriend just drank some water and handed the bottle back to Terry.

"Boyfriend did you hear what she said?" Girlfriend asked looking extremely ticked off.

"I'm sorry what were we talking about?" Boyfriend said wiping his face off.

"Ugh, let's just do the next one." Girlfriend said clearly tired of bickering.

*After high*

Boyfriend took a seat to rest for a second while Mommy Mearest looked at Terry while a red light went on.

"Terry give me a joint and light it." She whispered.

"But ma'am I-"

"Hatatata I don't want to hear it just give it to me." She said looking angry at him for a moment.

"Yes ma'am."

Straight after she took a puff and smoked it.

"Oh no" girlfriend mumbled prepared to be embarrassed with seeing her mom smoking weed.

"Hey you blue haired son of a bich!" Double M yelled out.

"Boop boop." Boyfriend looked at the now angry demon lady.

"Let's make sure that this battle hits hard." She said glaring at him.

"C'mon boys let's make this dance the best possible one yet." Carlos said ready to dance.

*After M.I.L.F yeah I said it*

Boyfriend just sat himself down panting at this point cause that was the hardest shit he's done so far.

"Ugh, the hell?" The mom said wondering what the hell she did about a minute ago.

"Ay double M that was fuuuunkayyy!" Carlos yelled.

She noticed girlfriend looking embarrassed as hell so she decided to apologize about what happened.

Afterwards they all made up and had a happy ending.

"Aww I love happy endi-" Jerry said as a lamp post hit him and all the henchman.

Afterwards the mother and daughter went to drop off Boyfriend off and when they got there the mom went to talk with him.

After approaching him she grabbed him by the cheeks and stared into his eyes

"If you hurt my little girl I will send you down to the deepest darkest pits of hell so you'll burn forever until the heat death of this universe, do you understand?" She said as her eyes glowed even redder than ever.

"Beep beep." Boyfriend said nodding up and down.

"Good."

After dropping off Boyfriend they came home to a military fance around their house along with turrets and the 'man' of the house in a military uniform.

"Ah the three most important things in my life my wife, my daughter, and Terry." The father said waving.

"Daddy why is all this here?" Girlfriend asked.

"Hold that thought and let me lower the drawbridge."

After that double M decided that this was unnecessary and went to scold her husband.

"Honey I swear to all that is unholy what is going on here?" She asked.

"Y'know just keeping away that little ugly stupid unbearable shrimp." Her husband said gridding his teeth at the last part.

"Terry hand me the weed." She ordered.

"Terry noooo-" daddy dearest was too late for now he was going to go through the hell he laid out for himself.

Chapter Text

It was one week before Halloween and Boyfriend just wanted some alone time after facing off against a retired rockstar, a Hitman, a friend of Girlfriend's, and a public icon he needed a break.

He got a call from pico.

"Hey dude happy Halloween oooooo spooky." Pico said chuckling.

Boyfriend just stayed silent.

"Dude you ok did the demons steal your tounge?" Pico asked concerned.

"No I just need a break from Girlfriend's dad trying to kill me." Boyfriend said sounding depressed.

"Well if you want to just have some alone time with your gal Darnell told me about a corn maze." He said trying to sound spooky.

"Well in that case." Not said as he hung up and called Girlfriend.

"Hello?"

"Girlfriend let's go to a corn maze and chill." Boyfriend said in excitement.

"Oh ok well I'll be there in a bit.

After a while they met up at the maze witch had a sigh stating that it belonged to a guy named Zardy.

"Boyfriend you're here and well." Girlfriend said happily.

"Yeah it's great to see you too." Boyfriend said hugging her.

They soon blasted some tunes out in the field

"Zardy there's too much noise." A pumpkin crawler told him.

Zardy saw the two hoodlums wandering around in his maze.

"Don't worry this I'll deal with this." Zardy said gripping his hoe.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend sat down on the grass holding each other's hands.

"Darn brats, trespassing with their damn noise cannons!" Zardy yelled at the two trespassing children.

"Beep!" Boyfriend exclaimed in surprise.

"You should know it's dangerous to wander in the dark." He continued his rant.

Girlfriend knowing what happens next summoned her speakers and took a seat.

"But if you want a show I'll give you a show!" He yelled as he attached a mic to his hoe although the hoe penitrated instead.

"Beeeeep." Boyfriend beeped in disappointment.

*After foolhardy*

The scarecrow disappeared after he just lost, the two left afterwards.

"I'm sorry that you had to rap again, I know you wanted a break from the battling." Girlfriend said as they exited and rubbed Boyfriend's shoulder.

"Eh it's not your fault I should've known Darnell goes to the stupidest places." Boyfriend said giving Girlfriend a kiss afterwards.

"Mom was right you are a gentleman." Girlfriend said giving Boyfriend a big ol smooch.

Dave was prepared for his first mission in the group [REDACTED] his mission destroy the maze holding the anomalys.

It's for the greater good.

Zardy watched as mutiple cars came at the mazes location.

'What the' he thought as he saw multiple armed men come out with flame throwers and flashlights.

Zardy soon went to pumpkin jack.

"Jack get the crawlers out of here" he said knowing what happens when fire touches corn or anything like that for the matter.

Jack soon gathered the crawlers he could find and started to get out of there.

Until a man in a white uniform ran into jack and axed off a crawler, right after the rest got set on fire.

Right as jack regained himself he went after the human who killed the crawlers.

However he never accounted for another human shining a flashlight on him.

"Jack no-" Zardy yelled but it was too late jack was set on fire and kicked into the maze.

Zardy watched it burn as well as hear screams of pain.

The maze continued to burn and yes the men didn't notice him nor the poles sticking out the ground.

Cause Cable crow started slaming them down one after another.

"That was for jack!" He yelled smashing a mans skull on a pole.

Although that victory was short lived, cable Crow's poles soon fell victims to the fire adding to the destruction of the maze.

And as for the crow he got shot straight in the leg and pushed into the fire.

The brutes caught wind of the events and started attacking the soldiers.

They started of strong and killed a few of the men but two of them fell in battle and were burned yet the last one just kept going until he showed up a... Cloud at least that's what he looked like.

He shined the light at him and the brute froze and then a gunshot ringed as it fell to the ground.

The only one left was Zardy.

He was surrounded and grabbed by a metallic object witched clinged onto his neck.

He helplessly watched as the gun pointed out to his head.

He soon closed his eyes knowing what's to come but what happened next was something no one could expect.

The cloud man dropped the gun and stared Zardy in the eyes.

"Just contain him." He said calmly.

Zardy soon lost all consciousness, and woke up scarred and forever changed along with a collar on his neck.

"Wh-What where am I?" He asked grabbing the collar and getting shocked afterwards.

Lights soon shined on to a wooden puzzle.

"Solve the puzzle." A voice from more noise cannons came out.

Zardy knew that nothing was left and that his friends are gone in the giant corn maze in the sky.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had finally made it to Girlfriend's house witch had military weapons with it, all of witch pointed straight at him.

Girlfriend and her mom opened the door.

"Oh don't worry they have no ammo!" Girlfriend yelled.

Boyfriend gave out a slight breath of relief, but it was cut short with an electric shock.

He heard Mommy Mearest laughing at him and then the other parent showed up.

"Ha take that you little twerp." Dearest said as Boyfriend got up.

"Dad" Girlfriend said clearly pissed at her dad's childish behavior.

Her mom was still just laughing.

After some bickering her father finally turned off the electricity field.

"So Girlfriend what costumes are we wearing.

"Well how about I give you the time." She cryptically said handing Boyfriend a bag.

It was a peanut butter spread on bread.

"It's peanut butter jelly time!" Girlfriend yelled as she put on her costume.

But someone was there to rain on their parade.

"Sorry sweetheart but I can't let you do that." Double D said snapping away the costumes.

"What about sleeping beauty and prince charming." She said again.

And again the answer was no, even after many attempts the answer was just no.

"Besides you're too old for trick or treating." He said taking the last two costumes away from her.

"Then what do we do for Halloween?" Girlfriend asked tapping her foot.

"Well, you'll be handing out candy..." He said.

"But that's Jerry's job." Girlfriend said clearly bummed out.

"In an old friend's house." He finished.

Soon the father drove them up to the house on the hill.

He also explained that there is a bowl of candy inside and the basics of candy handing.

The couple knew that this was going to be a terrible experience.

Jerry waited for knocks on the door witch probably wasn't happening due to the fact that his boss spent a fortune on the military shit he's used for Boyfriend repellent as he calls it.

Until finally a knock on the door.

"Hello anyone?" He said looking but not finding anyone.

"Down here." A child's voice said.

He looked down and saw two kids in different costumes.

One was a skeleton and the other was a pumpkin with a fancy suit.

"It'sa spooky month, now give us candy." The pumpkin said.

"Ok how about Carmel apples?" Jerry asked looking ecstatic.

"Anything else?" The skeleton asked.

"Nope this year is Carmel year." Jerry said handing them each one.

The children right after stuck them on his glasses and slammed the door.

"So what kind of candy do we have Skid?" Pump asked looking in his bag.

"Let's see, cola from the house with the void eye guy, church candies from the lady in the church, and Tony chocolalony from the house with a loud garage." Skid said

"That's small." Pump responded.

"Hey kids over here." A random bush said.

"Ooh a magic bush."

"Give us candy."

"Sorry kids I don't have any on me but I know where to get some." The bush said

"Where?"

"The old house on the hill has a girl made of candy."

"Pump are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"That the m&m's people committed murder."

"No silly but that is true, let's go to the house on the hill."

They both lied on the ground dead.

"Uhh-"

"Oh lord that strange bush killed the kids!" A random woman yelled.

"SOMEBODY STOP THE BUSH!"

Boyfriend lied on the sofa eating candy from the bowl and checking his siblings socal media until hearing a knock on the door.

"Beep bop."

He soon saw a pumpkin slide by.

"Beep boop boop bep."

"Aw babe calm down it's just a little kid in a pumpkin costume." Girlfriend said calmly.

"Hello!" A voice came from the ceiling.

A kid's body popped out of the pumpkin and caught a skeleton kid that hung from the ceiling.

IT'SA SPOOKY MONTH!" They yelled in unison.

"Spooky month!" Girlfriend yelled as she started dancing.

"Now give us the candy lady!" The pumpkid said pointing at Girlfriend.

"What?" Girlfriend said stopping herself.

"You're made of candy, and we want candy." The skeleton said.

"Beep bop skop"

"A rap battle for candy lady?" The pumpkin asked.

Boyfriend nodded

"Ok let's do it" they said in unison.

"By the way I'm skid and this is pump!" Skid introduced himself and Pump.

"Beep."

*After spookeez*

"Hey that's pretty good you beat me" skid said.

"Skid hand me that mic." Pump said confidently.

"Bop bee." Boyfriend beeped back

"You're going down punk." Pump said pulling off stink eye and a raspberry.

*After south*

"Aww I guess we don't get candy." Skid said Sadly.

"No you don't kids." A shadowy lemon figure said.

"Wait who are you?" Girlfriend asked as the kids took a seat on the other two speakers.

"Well all you should know is that I'm a monster." It said twisting it's neck.

"And you are the meal

*After monster*

"Beep boop." Boyfriend said with pure sass.

Monster looked down at the children who failed him, he decided to have at least a snack.

"Kids you should know something else." He said licking his lips.

He leaned himself twords their ears and whispered.

"I'm not just a monster I'm a stranger." He said grabbing the duo by their costumes.

"This isn't spooky." Pump said struggling in the lemon's grasp.

"It'sa scary." Skid said afterwards.

Girlfriend saw this and couldn't let these kids get hurt.

"Boyfriend help them out, please." Girlfriend told him pointing at the lemon head guy.

Boyfriend snapped out of his trance and ran into the lemon demon's body knocking him over

Girlfriend caught the kids as well and the four of them watched as the monster tumbled down the hill.

After that situation Boyfriend gave them each one half of the candy and had them on their way.

Skid soon went back to his house with his mom.

And pump walked alone for a while until Roy showed up with the hatz gang.

"Well well well what do we have here?" Roy asked him.

"A pumpkin?" Pump said as he stepped back.

"No a loser that's what we got" Robert said giving pump a sneering grin.

"Let's beat him u-" Roy said as a gun clicking interrupted him.

"Step the fuck away from him or this gun's safety is comin straight off." A mysterious stranger said.

Without any second thought the gang ran as far away as possible.

"Who are you kid?" the stranger revealed himself to be a man with orange hair and a green sweater.

"P-pump."

"Huh do you want to stay with me for a while pump?" The stranger said.

"Who are you?" He asked getting up.

"Names Pico." He said putting his gun in it's holster.

"Now ya comin or not?"

"Ok!" Pump said happily holding on to Pico's hand.

Chapter Text

Skid and pump who was still wearing his pumpkin for some reason, were running around the mall during Christmas with Skid's mom Lila who was trying to get them under control.

The reason they were there was because Skid had made a new friend and he wanted his mom to meet her so they along with Pump went to the Mall the week before Christmas.

Pico, Darnell, and Nene all of them went to the mall since Boyfriend said to meet him there.

"Why did Boyfriend want to see us here again?" Darnell asked hiding himself from public eyes.

"Hell if I know, probably wants payback for us sending him to a haunted corn maze." Pico said not disturbed by the public.

"The one that was burnt down?" Darnell asked.

"Did you do it?" Pico asked back glaring at him.

"Hell nah I wasn't going back there." Darnell snapped at him.

Carol had gone alone to the mall with no one, Sunday wasn't a big fan of Christmas and pets weren't allowed in the Mall so she went alone to meet with Girlfriend.

Miku had gone to the mall with her phone calling Ritz, on her way to see her little brother.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had been wandering around the mall looking for their friends and family.

"Boyfriend can we please go see Santa I really want my presents to be right." Girlfriend asked looking at Boyfriend with puppy dog eyes.

"Beep ba." Boyfriend said nodding his head cause how could you not say no to that face.

They finally saw the sign for seeing Santa although there was a lot of chitter chatter.

"What the." Girlfriend said clearly confused about the situation.

"Oh hello daughter, and her friend." A familiar voice said from Santa's spot in the mall.

It was Daddy Dearest and his wife Mommy Mearest sitting in Santa's place, the former pointing a gun to Santa's head

"Daddy why are you pointing a gun at Santa's face?" Girlfriend asked.

"Daughter this is a mall Santa." Her father told her.

"But those Santas report to the real Santa." Girlfriend said looking as innocent as possible.

"Sweetheart you should know that it's a myth to make these broke deadbeats feel important." He said again gripping his gun tighter than before.

"This one especially cause he was lookin at my wife!" He yelled firing the gun at Santa's feet.

"Honey I can just rip him inside out and throw him in hell." Mommy Mearest said concerned about her public image.

"Let's just do some caroling eh." Double D said glaring at Boyfriend.

"May the best man win." Boyfriend mumbled.

*After coca*

Pico had rushed to the escalator railings with Nene behind him, Pump was still in here.

"Hey guys Santa is getting shot!" Darnell yelled way too excited.

"Dude why is that exciting?" Pico asked as Nene filed her nails.

"I'm banned from the north pole." He said without skipping a beat.

Skid and Pump were running to Santa's workshop, even after a gunshot ringed.

Lila being the sane and caring parent she is grabbed the two and picked them up stopping them from getting into anymore danger.

Carol decided to check out the Santa's shop thing cause that's most likely where Girlfriend would be, after getting there she saw Girlfriend dying of embarrassment, her parents threatening a mall Santa, and Boyfriend just standing there.

"Outta my way poofers Santa's dyin tonight!" A random guy yelled pushing her over.

"Oh geez sorry bout that, he is not mentally stable." Another guy said as he helped her up.

He was ginger with a green sweater and brown khakis, and next to him a girl in a pink dress.

"It's fine, why the large crowd anyway?" Carol asked adjusting her sweater.

"Didn't you hear the gunshot?" The man with the green sweater asked her.

Miku watched as her little brother rapped against two people at once needless to say she was proud.

"Uhh excuse me I wish too see better please." A man in a trench coat said.

"Oh sorry, happy holidays." She said moving a bit.

"Yes indeed." The man said.

"Honey I'm All in for fucking with the kid's mind but sweet Lucifer is this pushing my limits." Double M said sounding ticked off.

"But smooches I'm doing it for our daughter's safety." Double D stated.

"Dad you're being so embarrassing!" Girlfriend yelled.

"Let's just continue caroling." Daddy Dearest said clicking the gun.

*After eggnog*

Pico decided that enough was enough about went to deal with the Devil holding Santa at gunpoint, Nene followed with him.

Skid was struggling in his mom's arms with Pump, he saw something in the corner of his eye a blue streak of hair.

"Mum our friends are right there!" Skid said still trying.

"Skid I'm not letting you kids get hurt!" His mom said still holding on.

Pump however felt lighter for some reason.

"Mum where's Pump?" Skid asked as Lila checked and found out she was carrying his pumpkin, and soon realized she let go of Skid who ran off with Pump.

Carol decided that she could meet up with Girlfriend for this last song after all what could possibly go wrong?

Miku started clapping for her little bro and finally got news from Ritz.

"Hey sis how are you doin?" Ritz asked munching on cheese as usual.

"Well Boyfriend is rapping and doing it well." Miku said happily.

"Cool we doing that Christmas reunion soon sis?" Ritz asked.

"Of course that's why I'm here." She answered smiling.

They continued to conversate with each other for a while.

"Damnit how are you this good!" The father yelled pressing the trigger but not to the point of fireing the gun.

"Bee-"

"Shut up, I'm not going to let you walk out alive after beating me 5 times!" He yelled again finally pressing the trigger and fireing.

The lights went out as that happened.

Boyfriend looked up to the tree as the lights went on as he looked it became more and more bloody wrapped up in entrails and decorated in organs until he saw Girlfriend's head but it looked corrupt in some way.

"Boyfriend!" He heard a familiar voice, but it was one he loved.

"Beep" Boyfriend said looking for her.

After a few seconds they found each other within the red snow and fog.

"Boyfriend I got so worried about you." She said holding him.

"Beep." Boyfriend said consoling her.

After a few minutes of consoling each other a laugh came out from the fog.

As it continued to clear so did the knocked out image of Girlfriend's parents and the lemon monster holding a frying pan... Along with Santa's head.

"Ah, what a shame could've cooked with it but oh well." He said throwing it away.

"I can just rip you apart, and save you for later." It said as his face peeled from four different parts of his head.

It revealed teeth many individual teeth All of witch were sharp.

"Beep boop bep bee." Boyfriend said angred.

"Ah and the prepping has begun." He said twisting his neck in a three hundred sixty degree motion.

"Mom, Daddy?" Girlfriend asked seemingly scared.

No response they were out cold.

"Ok we can start making out." Girlfriend said shifting moods.

"Let's rap first, I'm feeling famished." The monster said licking his lips.

*After winter horror land*

"Ugh do you ever feel anything besides hungry? Girlfriend asked checking her nails.

Girlfriend felt something behind her and she just had to be her idiot self.

"Carol I'd knew you'd be here!" Hi yelled in happiness.

Carol mumbled under her breath clearly pissed.

"Oh what do we have here, another meaty flesh sack." It said as it's face continued to open.

"Uh Girlfriend I feel like all three of us should start running, as fast as possible." Carol said grabbing their hands.

"I can take him." Boyfriend said putting his dukes up.

But that wasn't Wise at all.

Tendrils came out of the face grabbing the three by their waists.

Girlfriend just continued to smile, Boyfriend tried to get out of it while cussing at the monster, and Carol was crying for help and being the most rational.

Another gunshot rung and missed it by an inch.

It was Pico with Nene at his side holding his gun close.

"Let them go you fucking freak!" He yelled as Nene got impatient and threw a knife at him.

Although that was also not wise either, as the monster caught it and it went right back at her pinning her on the empty Santa throne by her neck.

Carol just started screaming bloody murder as the monster grabbed Pico by the neck.

"Well this is unexpected , I just wanted a meal but here comes a feast just for me."it said joyfully.

"Girlfriend do something!" Carol screamed trying to get out of the lemon's grasp.

But before she could answer two unlikely heroes came out to save the day.

"Ay lemon demon!" A kid with purple hair and a jaket yelled.

"Hmm well if it isn't spit and dumb." He said condescending recognizing the children who failed him and threw him down a hill.

"Let our friends go!" Pump who was holding a board yelled.

"Pump get out of here!" Pico yelled recognizing the voice of the kid that he was talking care of.

"Oh no need Pricko, I already got a buffet what else could I need?" The lemon asked.

"A friendship from eyes." Skid stated holding up a Ouija board.

"There's no way, you couldn't know it at all." The monster laughed.

Skid just used the board normally as the monster laughed at him and Pump.

Soon he was done and the room went silent.

"Ha, so you were just blu-" he said before a blue portal opened, and what came out actually made the lemon feel something he hadn't felt in a long time.

Fear

One by one his limbs were grabbed as he slowly was dragged into the portal yelling in fear and pleading for salvation.

Yet his wishes were unfulfilled.

"Kids you saved our lives!" Pico yelled in happiness.

"Could someone please explain what the fuck happened?" Carol said looking at The group.

And after a long ass while the dearest couple woke up and the mall was back to normal.

Except for Santa and Nene's corpses.

"Sweetheart what happened while we were out?" Mommy Mearest asked rubbing her temples.

After a lot of explaining everyone got back to their thing.

"Alright you little punk, let's finish this." Daddy Dearest said removing Nene from the chair.

"Dear I have a splitting headache." His wife said getting a bottle of pain meds from Terry who had shopped.

As the Dearest began to argue Skid had grabbed his mom to introduce his new friends.

"Mum this is Boyfriend and Girlfriend, Boyfriend and Girlfriend this is my mum." Skid said introducing them

"Beep boop." Boyfriend said holding out his hand.

"Um, hello." Lila said awkwardly shaking Boyfriend's hand.

"Hello Ms. Skid's mom." Girlfriend said waving.

"And this is Pico." Pump said as he took the knife out of Nene casually.

"Hey there." Pico said shaking his head.

"Dude what the hell happened?" Darnell asked not even asking about Nene.

"Lemon." Pico said.

"Huh that's what." Darnell said sarcastically.

Boyfriend watched as his friends either argued or talked wich made him smile.

"Konichiwa." He heard.

As soon as he heard it he knew exactly who it was.

His older sister Hatsune Miku.

"Sis it's been a while since we chatted." Boyfriend said.

"Hey Miku still doing music I see." Pico said tapping his foot.

"Yes."

"Boyfriend who is this?" Daddy Dearest asked taking a seat on the blood stained throne.

"This is my sister Hatsune Miku." Boyfriend said as Miku waved.

"Whosune whatku?"

"It's japanese old man." Pico said.

"No way." Pump said.

"The real Hatsune Miku!" Skid said as  he and Pump went to the famous singer.

"Can we get your autograph!" The two children said extremely excited.

"Mochiron." She said getting a paper and pen and handing it signed to them.

"So cool." Pump said.

"Wait till everyone at school hears about this." Skid said as they went back to his mom.

"I still have no clue who this Miku person is." Daddy Dearest said still sitting on blood.

"Honey let's just go home." His wife said getting ready to drag him out of there like a toddler.

"Fine, but mark my words you will break up with my daughter if it isn't the last thing I do!" He yelled as he began walk out.

"Don't worry about him I'll get him a hot cocoa Ms. Girlfriend." Terry said as he walked out with his bosses.

Soon after a lot of conversation with each other everyone left for Christmas to spend time with family.

Now isn't that wholesome but monster is trapped in an eternal hell for himself

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had finally made it back to Philly where everyone was at.

Pico, Skid, Garcello, and of course the love of his life, the apple of his eye.

Girlfriend, the most beautiful woman on the planet, and Boyfriend was on his way to see her.

He was ecstatic about this, seeing her again after a weeks worth of family bonding with Miku, Ritz, and his parents.

Girlfriend was going crazy to see her wonderful boyfriend after a week, so much so that she, the henchmen, and her mother all got together and decorated the house to welcome him back.

All except her father who was plotting his next scheme to exterminate the pest his daughter called a boyfriend.

"Daddy aren't you going to help us?" Girlfriend asked looking at him.

"No Girlfriend I won't be helping anything that includes your Boyfriend being happy." He said not looking at her.

"But daaaaad."

"No buts, I won't change my mind." He said back.

Ever since they met the two had a less than liking relationship, in fact they hate each other still.

Although what the rest of the family didn't know is that he has the power to keep him out with the press of a button. He can turn this place into a restricted zone for the pest.

Boyfriend had finished greeting Skid and Pico who were in the same house for some reason, but he didn't question it.

As he looked for Girlfriend's house he bumped into an old friend, Garcello.

"Ba bee po bop." Boyfriend said waving at his buddy.

"Oh, didn't see you there little man." Garcello said holding a cig.

"Beep boop babby beep."

"I guess you're trying to get to your girlfriend." He said perfectly guessing what he was doing.

"Bep"

"Well my best guess is to go to the house with all the military tech." He said taking a cig our of his coat.

"Beep boop."

"No problemo little man."

Boyfriend went to the place Garcello said , and what he saw was completely expected a bunch of fences and turrets.

"Ha take that you stupid twat!" Speak of the devil Boyfriend thought.

Daddy Dearest the single worst thing to happen to Boyfriend next to homelessness, that and near death experiences.

"Beep boop skibity bop m go fuck off." Boyfriend said not wanting to deal with this.

"Oh you little." The devil said.

The ex rockstar who's music Boyfriend liked jumped down and cracked his knuckles.

"You may have the rest of my family fooled, but not me."

Girlfriend was talking to Carol on the phone waiting for her wonderful boyfriend with his Blue hair and red hat.
Combine that with a cute stature and that shining personality.

"I just can't wait to see BF!" Girlfriend said excited.

"BF?" Carol asked.

"Y'know  boy friend boyfriend abbreviate it and it's BF."

"Well as long as my brain cells aren't killing themselves when you call him snookie bear." Carol said laughing to herself.

"that's a good name and you know it." Girlfriend said insulted.

"Hey girl you know I'm joking." Carol said.

The two just continued to talk about each other's Christmases and new years.

Daddy Dearest was finally about to destroy this mere child and free himself from the curse.

"Honey is..." His wife exited the house to ask him something.

"What the fuck is this?"

"Uhh my BFD."

"And that stands for?"

"boyfriend destroyer." He said embarrassed.

"God damnit, let him in."

"But smoo-"

"Don't start."

Daddy Dearest finally turned off the defenses.

"Beep" Boyfriend said smugly.

Boyfriend walked into the house wondering why it was dark in there.

"SURPRISE!" A bunch of henchmen and Girlfriend yelled.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled surprised.

Apparently Girlfriend made a surprise party for him.

After all there were things like balloons, ribbons, and even cake.

"BF I'm so glad you're back!" Girlfriend yelled hugging and kissing him a bunch.

"Beep bap"

"Aww don't be silly, we can just be well y'know, alone." Girlfriend said raising her eyebrows.

"Oh beep beep." Boyfriend said nodding and smiling.

The two went up to Girlfriend's room prepared for some fun times...

Playing video games of course, what did you think they were going to do?

"Hm what can we play?" Girlfriend asked looking at random PlayStation games.

"I don't know maybe we can do something else." Boyfriend said smiling at her

"Oh, how about Hating simulator?" Girlfriend said happily holding up a PS1 game.

"That sounds lame." Boyfriend said not very enthusiastic.

"Aww c'mon BF this is my favorite game." She said looking extremely sad.

"Fine I guess."

Girlfriend booted up the game jittering on the bed smiling while Boyfriend was just sitting there.

The mad dad watched as the two held hands and his daughter kissing that blue rat.

"Terry I've had enough of this shit." He said to Terry the only person he could trust.

"Well sir, I think it's best not to intervene." Terry said back tapping his foot.

"Screw it, I'm taking that kid down." He said running into the room grabbing the boyfriend and yeeting him into the TV and the game.

"Ha take that you little son of a-"

"Sir"

"What is it Terry?"

"You threw in both of them in."

"Fuck"

Boyfriend slightly opened his eyes and saw the concrete, as he looked around he saw pure cherry blossom trees and a school in the background although it looked off.

Ow the hell was that? He thought looking around for Girlfriend.

As he looked around for Girlfriend he saw a group of people chatting around someone.

"I love your hair." He heard one girl say.

"Could you show me how to do my nails like that?" Another one asked.

Boyfriend decided to make his way through the crowd, but it wasn't too much of a problem, due to his shortness.

After going through a crowd of people he saw Girlfriend standing there showing herself off to the others.

"Beep boop babby beep boop." Boyfriend came up to Girlfriend.

"Aww he's so cute." A random girl said pinching his cheek and pulling it.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled wanting to get out of this hell, until he saw the most unsightly thing ever.

A ginger douche with a suit and tie.

Boyfriend threw his mic straight at the school boy missing on purpose.

Although he was thankfully noticed it wasn't for a good reason.

Yet the man didn't seem to angered.

"Ah a new fair maiden has come in search of true love." He said taking out a microphone and as girls started gathering around.

"A serenade between gentleman shall decide where her beautiful heart shall reside." He continued.

"Beep bo bap"

*After senpai*

Daddy Dearest and Terry were panicking about what he just did, throwing Boyfriend and Girlfriend (the latter was accidental) into the TV.

"Sir what do we do." Terry said looking at the thing.

"I just got to let my power recharge." Double D said making sure his wife wasn't inside.

"It needs to recharge!" Terry yelled panicking knowing that his other boss could kill him after finding out about her daughter.

"Not bad for an ugly worm." The douche said glaring.

"I'll rip your nuts off after your girlfriend's done gargling mine!" He continued his rant to intimate Boyfriend.

"Bop beep be be skdoo bep!" Boyfriend yelled flipping off senpai.

The girls behind them soon started looking at the fight discusted

He hated this stupid place and just wanted to GTFO.

*After roses*

"Why you little-" the man said freezing up.

"W-wha"

"Ahg ugh no no n- AHHHH." He yelled clutching his face before it blew open as he dissipated into a few pixels of dust.

He formed into a new being a red... Spirit.

"Direct contact with humans after so long..." He paused.

"And her of all people." He said looking at Girlfriend.

"I'll make her father pay for what he's done to me... To all the others..."

"I'll beat you, and make you take my place."

"It's only fair." He finished.

Boyfriend did nothing but smile not only is that D-bag dead but this is finally more interesting than a stupid dating sim.

*After thorns*

Daddy Dearest and Terry were watching for Mommy Mearest to make sure she hasn't come back inside for party supplies.

"Damn it sir can you charge that power any slower?" Terry said worried about being a new coat rack.

"Wait I feel something, like if I was able to do it." His boss said sarcastic.

"Then funking do it we don't have much time!" Terry yelled in fear.

"Alright fine but only my daughter." He responded while sticking his hand in the TV.

The ground started shaking and the school crumbled into pixilated dust.

"What's happening?" The spirit asked in a panic.

All of a sudden Girlfriend was picked up like a puppy by its scruff by a huge purple hand and was pulled away.

It was just the boy and spirit left to wander endlessly through these schoolgrounds.

Except the spirit felt something, something he hadn't felt in a long time.

He felt sorry for this unknowing victim of Daddy Dearest.

"What have I become?" He said looking at the small child.

The child looked at him strangely.

"Using an innocent being's body for my own gain." He continued.

The child continued looking at him.

"This is something that... Demon would do." He continued.

"My soul is, it's just a faded shell."

"But you young man, you have the potential to put an end to his reign of terror."

"For all the others." He finished his speech as the ground continued to crumble.

Daddy Dearest held Girlfriend by her dress and set her down.

"Alright Girlfriend I'm sorry for accidentally throwing you in the game."
Daddy Dearest said patting her on the head.

Boyfriend followed afterwards and rolled out the TV much to double D's dismay.

"Boyfriend!" Girlfriend yelled in excitement hugging him at the same time.

After Boyfriend readjusted himself into reality, he and Daddy Dearest decided to make a deal.

Boyfriend got a free dinner date with Girlfriend and Daddy didn't have to deal with his wife.

The two had their date at McDonalds.

And Boyfriend kept better watch on himself just in case y'know.

Chapter Text

The mad dad was up to his old tricks again he wanted Boyfriend to suffer this time.

"What to do, what to do?" He asked himself.

He turned on the news and saw a reporter that looked familiar maybe she was at the Mall probably.

"We have more reports for the situation in the hellscape of America known as Nevada!" She said holding paperwork.

Huh so Nevada is hell, wasn't it always?

"Yes thank you Zone, Grunt Samson here giving you news about Nevada's savior the Auditor." A reporter that had no eyes or mouth said.

Auditor huh, sounds like a cool guy.

The camera panned to a laptop with two red lights that were surrounded by complete black.

"Mr. Auditor what are your plans for the agency?"

"The agency against Hank Wimbleton will make sure that criminal gets what he deserves."

"You heard it here first folks stay out of Nevada and even if in Vegas stay clear of these cri-" the reporter said before double D turned off the TV now having a new idea to rid that pest.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend were sitting on a bench together until he got a call from who else Daddy Dearest.

Boyfriend (reluctantly) answered the call hearing that demon tell him that they should know each other better and try to mend a relationship.

While Boyfriend hated the idea he knew how much it would make Girlfriend happy.

They soon got on a plane that was barely populated with only... Nene?

What's weirder though is that this was a public plane even though daddy Dearest had his own private jet.

Jerry had snuck in the cockpit and cloroformed the pilot and co pilot and was now crashing this shit.

A few hours had finally passed when they got to the hellscape.

"Alright Jerry crash here!" His boss yelled

"Okie dokie sir" Jerry said before realizing that if he crashes the plane he'll die.

But it was too late for Jerry.

Deimos had been driving Hank and Sanford for about a few hours now until he got a call from 2B.

"Uh, what is it Doc?" Deimos asked stopping the "McDonald's mobile" (Hank named it)

"Good news everyone a plane crashed in the middle of Nevada." He said to the three.

"Oh wow, any survivors?" Sanford asked surprised of how morbid that sounded.

"Ooh sounds like some fresh meat." Hank said excited.

"I'm Not sure yet but there are some good ass computer parts." 2B said.

"Now get your mutilated asses out there.!" He yelled before hanging up.

The three drove to the wrecked plane and looked mainly for computer parts.

"Hey guys I found someone!" Sanford yelled at them.

When they all gathered up they found a kid with blue hair and a human with red hair.

"Are those humans?" Deimos asked looking concerned.

Sanford grabbed the one with blue hair and started carrying him.

"Maybe, but we should get them on the car."

"McDonald's mobile!" Hank corrected him.

They were soon loaded on the car and the three drove off to the lab but not before the kids woke up and started panicking.

"Beep beep beep!" The blue one yelled frantically.

"Shh it's ok we're just going with these strangers." The one with the red hair and dress said calmly consoling the smaller one

Soon the duo noticed the nevadians and started to realize what was going on.

"Boyfriend."

"Be"

"I don't think we're in Philly anymore."

"Boo bee spap." The one called Boyfriend said pointing at Hank.

"You want to rap battle me?" Hank asked looking at him.

"Bep"

"Alright I'm down, but if I win I get there satisfaction of snuffing you out." Hank said looking joyed.

*After Hank song one*

"Ight you got beats." Hank said crossing his hands.

"Beep boop skibity bop bee."

"Yeah I know I guess we have a bit in common." Hank said

The other two just watched confused about how Hank could understand that blue hair kid.

"Do you mind if I dance for this next one."

"Bo"

"Ight cool but you still might die."

*After Hank song two*

"Noice little dude how about one last one?" Hank asked.

"Bep bee po bop boop skibity bop." Boyfriend said.

"Names Hank motherfucker Wimbleton, and those dumb asses are Sanford and Deimos." Hank introduced himself and his advocates.

"Beep boop babby beep." Boyfriend continued.

"Yeah I know right." Hank responded to the kid.

*After Hank song three*

"Say you kids look familiar." Hank said thinking about the news.

War in Utah, no what about the new resort? No way.

Wait that girl she.

"You bitch!" Hank yelled at the girl pointing his sword at her throat.

"What are you talking about?" She asked looking at him like an idiot.

"You got wet at the McDonald's in Philly, didn't you!" Hank yelled.

Boyfriend thought about it and remembered last week.

He and Girlfriend had a date at McDonalds after Boyfriend blackmailed Daddy Dearest.

They both had gotten happy meals with among us toys Girlfriend got the same old red one like usual, Boyfriend however got the supreme rare purple imposter toy.

Boyfriend noticed how Girlfriend looked extremely jealous and guessed maybe Girlfriend would enjoy it more than him.

The rest you can guess by what Hank said.

"Deimos leave these offenders of fine dining!" Hank yelled in pure anger.

"Jebus Hank calm down." Sanford said grabbing Hank.

"They are scumbags who are lucky to even be alive since I lost the bet." Hank said even madder he was a man of his word, mostly.

The duo were left for dead but there was music playing in a nearby building.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend finally made it to the building playing music, it was grey and playing a remixed version of the chicken dance song.

The masked clown continued to dance on his speakers no Hank or Auditor to disturb him.

Just music, cookies, and sweet and sour sauce, he also thought about contacting his cousin... Eh maybe not da

"Beep boop." A voice from behind him.

The clown looked behind him to see a blue hair miget with a fashion disease.

He grabbed the record playing the chicken dance and put in another one labeled improbable outset.

*After funny cookie song.*

Boyfriend grabbed Girlfriend by the hand and ran the heck out of there because he didn't want to deal with whatever that thing was.

They finally stopped at a rocky hill a good distance away from the building there was also a grey stop sign for some reason.

The stop sign moved and cracked open the ground revealing the clown who was still masked.

"OMFG CLOWN!" It yelled as it crawled out of the ground.

Hank had been enjoying his McDonald's shake and nuggets, while Sanford and Deimos just drove.

But one thing you should know about Hank is that he has very good eyesight, and what he saw brought rage.

"Deimos take a left right now!" Hank yelled out, branding his gun he was about to have a good time.

"Beep boop babby beep!" Boyfriend yelled at the clown who was inching closer.

But as fast as light a car drove by and hit the clown's mask off.

And soon his face showed up green skin, a torn open mouth, and crooked teeth.

*After funny vroom vroom song*

Boyfriend did his signature peace sign in confidence.

The clown meanwhile was limp with no muscles moving yet he still spoke words.

"YOU DON'T KILL CLOWN, CLOWN KILLS YOU!" It yelled with a red and white blinding laser.

After that ordeal the clown was gone, vanished.

Boyfriend looked around and saw Girlfriend who was blown back giving him a thumbs up.

Boyfriend did a little confidence dance and took another look at her.

She was pointing up, and that's when it hit him... Literally it hit him really hard.

After that he fell on his face and into the Nevada sand.

Got followed suit but in a less painful way.

They no looked at the clown who was now a firey beast.

Hank saw the pure chaos and decided to take action with this shit.

"Sanford, Deimos. Take the shit to Doc and take a u turn back here!" Hank yelled at the two idiots.

"Wait what the fuck!" Deimos yelled as Hank jumped out of the McDonald's Mobile (TM).

Hank ran out, parkored on some floating rocks, and kicked off the girl who y'knowed in the Philly McDonald's.

Hank took a look at the demon clown TRICKY. (Wow I bet you didn't see that comin or you did and you funkin hate me now)

As soon as they noticed Hank Tricky let out a demonic roar.

*During HELLCLOWN*

Tricky roared out of pure anger and reached into himself and pulled out a huge gun and stared firing at the blue midget who Somehow dodged the bullets.

*After HELLCLOWN*

Hank decided that enough was enough and started attacking Tricky with an assault rifle, from multiple angles and as soon as it ran out of ammo he slashed Tricky on the head and took out a pistol ,aimed it at the demon's head and pulled the trigger.

Nothing happened cause he was out of ammo.

"Aw shi-" Hank said being cut off by Tricky's demon fist and getting launched at a cliff side.

Boyfriend had watched the fight go down and guessed that maybe if he helped Hank out he would ride out of this shit hole.

So he turned to the clown and threw his mic at him.

Again nothing happened because it was a fucking mic against an all powerful demon what did you think was going to happen?

Tricky had enough of this parisite and went to annihilate him with a singular punch.

Yet he couldn't kill the kid since he froze up and couldn't move.

Boyfriend looked at the giant demon clown who was frozen in place.

Then another blinding light of red happened and the clown was back to it's original state.

"What the- What happened? Why am speaking normally?" The clown who was now back to a zombie was asking themselves.

Then all of a sudden something grabbed him by the neck and pulled him into the sky.

"I'll be back, and when I am I'll tear you limb from limb!" He yelled as he ascended further into the red sky.

The lovey dovey duo helped out Hank from the ditch he was left in by the clown.

Tricky woke up to a... Void no there were walls and paint so it was a room.

He also felt a collar on his neck it felt annoying so he tried taking it off.

Only to be shocked afterwards for no good reason.

"Gah what the fuck!" Tricky yelled before hearing something, it sounded like pieces of wood hitting each other over and over again.

He walked in the direction the sound was coming from to see a scarecrow in a peculiar outfit.

"You!" Tricky shouted trying to get the fabric man's attention.

He just continued to hit a wooden circle in a square hole.

"Hey you I'm talking to you." Tricky continued to try and get the scarecrow to give him info in his cell.

Until the orange crow scarer finally spoke.

"You shouldn't be showing signs of intelligence." It said continuing to hit the circle in the square hole.

The noise continued to echo until Tricky tried to stop it and shocked himself trying.

Hank got up in doc's office he felt a massive headache on the back of his head.

When he walked out he saw the kids that he left for dead sitting next to Sanford and Deimos.

"Hank your awake." Sanford said nudging Deimos.

Hank wonderd how he got here last thing he remembered was getting punched by the demon clown and hitting a boulder.

"How the hell am I alive?" Hank asked looking at himself.

Doc then walked in tighting his goggles and putting his hands behind their back.

"The kids found you and brought you here after contacting Sanford." He explained.

After Hank and Boyfriend became cool Hank drove them up to it the outskirts of Utah.

"Well now we're out of that rut." Girlfriend said.

"Yeah I hope nothing ba-"

"FREEZE YOU MOTHER SUCKERS!" A man with a black helmet and square glasses yelled at them.

Daddy Dearest was happy as hell that the pest was in the American hell known as Nevada when he heard a yell from his wife wanting to know where Girlfriend was.

"Oh shit" were the last words out of his mouth.

Chapter Text

Pico was tapping his foot while in the bar nodding off watching Pump who was practically his son talking to Skid who was playing Minecraft.

"So Skid what do you think about the nice lady in the church?" Pump asked smiling.

"She's very nice." Skid said building a skeleton in Minecraft.

Pico looked at Nene who gave a faint smile.

Nene was basically a mute she either couldn't speak or chose not to.

"Guys we got ourselves another job!" Darnell yelled at the two adults.

"Can we come?" Skid asked.

"Pretty please." Pump continued for the skelekid.

"He- I mean heck no it's too dangerous!" Pico yelled stopping himself from cussing.

"Aww man." They said in perfect sync

"Anyway what's the job?" Pico asked Darnell.

"Well it's about finding Girlfriend." He said.

"Did the bitch get stuck in a tree or something?" Pump asked.

"Language."

"She's in Nevada." Darnell finished.

"Woah woah woah, Nevada!" Pico asked surprised.

"Yeah I'll get in contact with 2B and get you guys out into the hellscape." Darnell explained.

"And before either of you ask, I'm banned from Utah."

"Why am I surprised?" Pico asked himself.

"Oh and by the way if you find Boyfriend's corpse send me a pic." Darnell said again.

Boyfriend woke up tied up and in the back of a truck and looked around for Girlfriend.

The truck suddenly came to a stop and a door opened to reveal a man in black and white with round goggles.

"Hey dave the kid's awake." The man said.

"Well bring him to the Sarge Kevin!" The disimbodied man named Dave yelled.

Boyfriend was grabbed by the collar of his shirt and dragged in the desert within a military zone.

"Steve just park the damn thing!" John yelled at the walkie talkie.

"But cap I really need to pee." Steve said sounding in pain.

"You'll pee when that tank is in the right spot like cock and pussy!" John yelled again.

"Sir we found some intruders!" Private David yelled.

John turned around to be faced with, a blue dyed midget with the most horrible fashion sense John saw in a while.

"Well well well what do we have here?" The Tankman himself asked.

"Beep!" The midget yelled.

"I should just order my men to kill and rip your nuts off, but what the hell it's been a boring day, let's see what you got!" John yelled at the kid.

"Oh and by the way if you lose my men right there, you see em." Tankman said pointing at two men holding a redhead girl at gunpoint.

"Beep!" The kid yelled in anger.

"Heh that's not all, they'll blow your nuts off if you fail." He finished.

"Anyway with that out of the way."

"Let's do this"

*After ugh*

"Ha, pretty tight bars for a little dude who's simping over an ugly boring teenager who wears her mom's clothes."

"It hurts because it's true." Girlfriend said sobbing.

"That your ugly?" Tankman asked.

"What hell no I wear my mom's clothes." Girlfriend said sassy.

"Why am I not surprised?" Tankman asked himself sarcastically.

*After Guns*

"God mother f-ing damn it." The Tankman said face palming.

"Hold on I got a call from Steve!" Tankman said angred

Pico and Nene were in a helicopter they borrowed from an old friend of Darnell's.

The pilot was a government worker named Charles who was a pal of the pal of Darnell.

Pico watched as Nene balanced a knife on her finger tip and spun his gun until they got a call from who else.

"Uhh, hey guys where are you right now?" Darnell called the two.

Pico checked his phone too see that he and Nene were somewhere in Utah.

"Utah, why?" Pico asked.

"Cause that's where your supposed to be silly!" Skid said happily.

"Yeah Boyfriend and Girlfriend are in Utah and are about to die." Pump said.

"Holy sweet father of Nene!" Pico yelled pushing Nene and himself off the the chopper.

Boyfriend looked at the man who had been yelling at a phone for the last few minutes and waited until it was done.

"Anyway what was I saying, oh yeah, men get ready to fire!" He yelled as the two men who were holding Girlfriend at gunpoint clicked their guns at her.

Boyfriend started to panic, really the only thing that he truly was afraid of was Girlfriend getting hurt.

"Heh, no prom for you this year!" The Tankman laughed.

Although something was off about Girlfriend her skin was purpler and her eyes started to glow red.

Until Pico suddenly appeared kicking off Girlfriend from the speakers and bashed the Tankman on the lefts head in.

Nene also came out of nowhere but was shot as Pico spun his guns.

"Well if it isn't your sexually ambiguous angry little friend, don't you have a school to shoot up?"

"So we're doing slander then, well I guess that they should know about your miniscule cock if you can call it that." Pico said smiling.

"Eh at least I was more relevant than you." Tankman said.

"Leave the ratings out of this!" Pico yelled angrier.

"whatever let's rock ya cunt." The Tankman said laughing at the the last part while Boyfriend and Girlfriend gave him a confused look.

"You little cunts!" He said still chuckling.

*During stress*

Pico watched the man who stole his spot on the ratings board singing with his Ex and his Girlfriend.

Boyfriend was in the middle of his rapping when John started to say something.

"Huh, pretty good!" He yelled out smiling confidently.

*After stress*

Pico had comited a massecure maybe a genocide of Tankmen.

Tankman was on the ground panting and out of breath.

Suddenly came in a massive tank And in it was Steve.

"Steve blast these freeloaders to hell!" Tankman yelled angered beyond that.

"Uh, well cap you see, I kinda used up the tank ammo and-" before he could finish Tankman started cussing.

"God fucking damnit Steve there's only one quarter of our forces left and the tanks out of ammo, we're going to lose this war." Tankman said with tears coming from his visor.

"So you can't just make a tready?" Pico asked tapping Boyfriend and Girlfriend on their backs.

"Hell no, I worked hard for the last disc one of Titanic in the world and I ain't giving it up without dying first!" Tankman said with Steve playing an anthem.

Boyfriend, Pico, and Girlfriend all looked at each other and broke out laughing with only Boyfriend and Pico understanding. (the former to a lesser extent and Girlfriend not getting it)

"What's so funny about it?" Tankman asked insulted.

"Dude you do know that there are multiple copies of the disc in varring levels of quality." Pico deadpanned.

"Wait so I lost millions of soldiers for nothing but a few funky rap battles and for anyone's enjoyment" he said.

"Yeah but think of it this way that stupid war can end and you can do whatever you want." Boyfriend said being called ridiculous names by Girlfriend.

Charles landed the helicopter behind Girlfriend's speakers and opened the door.

Soon the trio got inside the thing and were about to take off but were stopped.

"Wait a minute how can we get to those copies of Titanic if Utah's basically dead?" Steve asked looking confused.

"You know what, John, Steve you guys can stay with me in Philly." Pico said holding out his hand.

"Alright it's a deal but I'm still using the tank."

"Ok, deal." Pico said shaking Tankman's hand.

And so our heroes returned home after mad men and a clown, the couple returned to Philadelphia with two new allies.

Chapter Text

Pico had finally gotten back home in a helicopter with Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Tankman, and Steve in it with him.

"Ugh, where are we?" Tankman asked.

"This looks like the lowest grade strip club joint you'd find in a ghetto captain." Steve said.

"Yep west Philadelphia where I was born and raised." Pico said breathing in that Philly nice air.

"Wait I thought you were a Sargent?" Girlfriend asked.

"Oh his name is just captain." Pico said snarky.

"That's a stupid name." Girlfriend said stroking her fun sized boyfriend.

"Oh your one to talk, that name sounds like a kitchen shelf and a door made it."  Tankman deadpanned.

After some arguments the chopper finally landed at the bar.

Tankman and Steve left for target to get disc one and two of Titanic, Pico went to tell Mommy Mearest and Daddy Dearest that Girlfriend had been found and is back home safe and sound, and Boyfriend and Girlfriend went to a taco bell near the bar.

"This Taco Bell is good but not as good as the one my dad owns." Girlfriend said munching down her taco.

"Wow your dad owns a Taco Bell?" Boyfriend said in amazement.

"Mhm, he makes 5$ a second y'know." She said devouring her nacho fries.

After their lunch break they went on a walk back home.

But Boyfriend felt something...
The call of nature.

"Uhh Girlfriend I kinda need to uhh use the loo." Boyfriend said sounding in slight pain.

"Oh you poor thing let's get you into a place." Girlfriend said.

"Come on! it's gonna be a big night!" Sarvente yelled at her Nokia phone.

"This time I really want you coming, I know our differences are a huge gap but this time..." Sarvente paused.

"I really want to spend time with you." She said.

She thought that would get under his skin.

But nope he responded with a "yo mama joke" as the youngsters called it witch didn't even make sense in context, mabye one of his new "friends" taught him that.

"Exuse Me! Don't Be Salty!" She yelled into it again.

"That was very unholy of you." She said calmed down

"*Sigh* just get here please I'm having guests over and even then it'll feel empty."

She hung up the phone and put it away, just in time for her helpers to return from the garden.

"Hello Ms. Sarvente!" Skid yelled with a water bucket in his hands and his friend Pump holding some garden tools.

"Oh children, how is the garden looking?" Sarvente asked.

"Like a garden." Pump said enthusiastic about it.

She chucked at the children's innocent nature.

"Well since you did all that I suppose I should get you two's rewards." She said grabbing two bags of candy.

"No thanks." Skid said with pump nodding his head.

"But I thought you loved candy." Sarvente said in confusion.

"We do but we did that too help you and nothing else." Pump said trying to look heroic.

Sarvente couldn't help but to feel touched that these children did a kind deed from their hearts.

"Well if you're going to continue these acts you should head down to the market and buy these things." She said grabbing a list and cash and handing it to the children.

"Yes ma'am!" The two said in sync.

As soon as they left sarvente sat down until she heard a noise near the entrance.

She went as soon as she heard it there were two more children.

"Greetings, are you here to join the church?" She asked waving her hand at them.

One was a boy with blue hair, and a red hat.

The other one looked stranger as if Sarvente had seen her before.

"Beeeeep" the blue haired one made a noise of minor pain.

"Sorry my boyfriend was looking for the bathroom." The girl said.

"Aww but you'd look like you'd fit right in." She continued.

"Beee bo bap!" The blue one yelled again.

"I'm sorry but I don't understand what you are saying, but I'll show you why it's good to join the church." She said  looking at the two.

*After Parish*

"I see how it is." Sarvente said looking irritated.

"It's always kids like you who think they can intrude this sacred place, just to make fun of it!" The nun said.

"This time I'll give you one last chance to join, you should really take that offer." She said again.

"Biiiiii" he beeped again in annoyance.

*After worship*

Sarvente walked out of the room in anger and saw him, Ruv.

"So you finally came." She said looking at him

"I'm sorry you have to see me like this Ruv it's just-" Sarv continued before being cut off by Ruv.

"It's k."

"It's my job to deal with this stuff anyway." He said getting up and walking into the room with the small kids.

Boyfriend finally got his chance to GTFO and use the bathroom with that ice cream headed lady gone.

So he ran to the stairs witch for some reason looked like they were extending for some reason but then he looked down to realize that he was off the ground.

After finding that out he was placed on the ground and looked up.

"I would've suggested that you do that sooner." A man with an eye patch told him with a blank expression.

Boyfriend wasn't mad or angry at him he was just tired of this shit show.

The man with an eye patch set him down and Boyfriend got a better look at him.

He had a white coat, ushanka, and the eye patch with a peculiar pattern on it.

"I see you pressed quite a lot of buttons while I was away." He said not really looking like he gave a damn.

"Like I said before, you should have joined or ran when you had the chance." He said again with the still face.

"But as I see you decided to pull a struggle and now here we are." He continued.

"Names Ruv by the way."

"Beep boop boop bep bee." Boyfriend said in pain trying to explain to the dense ass mofo.

"I would say break a leg, but I might break your's literally, and I'm going to make this as painful for you." Ruv said stopping as he found out that Boyfriend wasn't reacting.

"And your little girlfriend." Ruv said taking a mic from his pocket.

"BEEP!" Boyfriend said angred he nearly shit himself after hearing that

*After Zavodila*

"I'm sorry Sarv." Ruv said still keeping his blank expression.

"It's fine, really, to be honest-" Sarv said before being stopped by Ruv.

"The kid left." Ruv said calmly.

"What!"

The disrespectful child came out of a door witch was the bathroom's.

"Beeeeep" the child said relived.

"Uhh BF-" the small red head said instantly getting cut off by the nun.

"That's it, you've worn my patience to its last end!" Sarvente yelled.

"God may be extremely forgiving..." As soon as Sarv said that she ripped off the two crosses on her headpiece and her body soon became covered in all black while her hair became wings.

"But I'm not." She said smiling deviously.

*After Gospel*

"God Damnit!" The now angriest nun on the planet yelled.

She grabbed Boyfriend by the collar while Ruv held back that girl.

Although lucky for the nineteen year olds two old pals came to their rescue.

"Hi Ms. Sarvente!" Two voices rang out.

Sarvente instantly turned back into her regular form and checked who they were.

Of course it was the legendary duo Skid and Pump.

As soon as she went to greet them however they ran past her and ran to Boyfriend.

"Children what are you doing with these strangers?" Sarvente asked in annoyance while Ruv just stood there... Menacingly.

"They aren't strangers." Skid said shaking  the blue one's hand.

"Yeah they're our friends." Pump said afterwards in his usual goofy expression.

Soon after Pump said that the two explained that Boyfriend saved them from the demon known as monster and how he's fighting against Daddy Dearest for love.

"My apologies." Sarvente said not knowing about all that.

"Beep bo bay." Boyfriend beeped.

"Ruv can you also apologize?"

"No" Ruv said still having a blank expression and glaring at the poor thing.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend left afterwards Girlfriend gave Sarvente an odd looking glare.

Pico directed Tankman to the church where he, Darnell, and two other guys play games like poker and go fish.

When they made it there they knocked on the door and Ruv answered knowing the people that knocked, except for Tankman and Steve.

"So you finally made it." Ruv said looking down at them.

"Yeah Tom couldn't make it." Pico said.

"Who the hell is Tom?" Tankman said in curiosity.

"Trust me you'll know him when you see him." Pico said holstering his gun.

"Names Ruv." He said looking depressed.

"My name's John Captain Tankman, and that's Steve." Tankman said holding out his hand.

"Ruv are your friends here?" A lady's voice said from the inside.

"Yeah Sarv." Ruv said.

"Alright let's play some poker." Darnell said.

And that's what they did played poker and go fish.

Chapter Text

Garcello leaned up against a wall in the alley, knowing that the old man would help him with the cancer in his lungs.

How he got them, for money he tried to be a cigarette tester for a guy in purple and yellow.

He sighed taking a puff from a cigarette.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend walked down an alleyway holding hands and kissing, after the church incedent they were forgiven by the nun and were allowed in for anytime due to Boyfriend's affinity for fighting demons.

They were taking a walk in an ally and holding hands.

That was before noticing some strange smoke colored green.

Boyfriend knew exactly what it was.

"Beep beep!" He yelled pulling Girlfriend in excitement.

"What is it Boyfriend?" She asked confused.

"Trust me you'll see." Boyfriend said excited to see his old pal Garcello.

They made it there seeing him leaning on a wall.

"What's up little man?" Garcello said giving out Boyfriend's favorite nick name.

"Smoke catch your eye?"

"Bee bo bap." Boyfriend beeped.

"Pretty cool am I right, say you should try it." Garcello said giving a thumbs up.

"Say you could be even Cooler than you are now." Garcello said taking another puff.

"Bop pee bo." Boyfriend said shaking his head and arms signifying no.

"Are ya sure, Come on." Garcello continued.

"Bo bay boo"

"Hm, Tell ya what little man, if you beat me in a friendly little rap battle I'll get off your case. Sound cool." Garcello said looking at Boyfriend.

"Bobay"

"Heh, good to see you hyped up, by the way you don't mind me smoking do you, helps calm the nerves" Garcello said taking a huge puff.

*After Headache*

"Beep boop boop bep bee skibity bop mdada." Boyfriend paraded himself while Girlfriend clapped.

"Hey that was fun but uhh, my chest is starting to feel funny" Garcello said coughing.

"Beep..." Boyfriend said concerned.

"I'm not giving up you got some tight bars little man." Garcello said giving a thumbs up.

*During nerves*

Girlfriend sat on the speakers as Boyfriend rap battled the stranger.

In the middle of the song that stranger started coughing and Boyfriend looked concerned as Garcello continued to cough.

*after Nerves*

Garcello started coughing more and more until a blinding smoke cloud just shot out of him.

When Boyfriend opened his eyes he saw a ghost the one that was the man who stood in front of him.

"Well that hurt like hell but y'know that was probably better than what your girl's father was going to do to me." Ghostello said.

"Wait you knew my dad? Did he give you those icky things?" Girlfriend asked.

"Eh, your dad hired me to take him out for a cure of the lung cancer, but he didn't give me the things." Garcello explained.

Boyfriend was trying his best to hold back all of his tears.

"Guess I overestimated these old things." Garcello laughed a bit pointing at his lungs.

"Bee..." Boyfriend tried say something or make a noise but his throat made out nothing.

"It's fine I'd rather it be me than you."
Garcello said.

"But y'know, I don't much time here." He continued.

"Say how about we end things off with a bang little man?" Garcello asked smiling.

Boyfriend hasteley nodded.

*During Release*

The ghost and Boyfriend had been rapping for a while when Boyfriend ended a verse.

"Tight bars little man." Garcello said giving a thumbs up.

*After Release.*

"Heh pretty good little man." Garcello said.

"Sorry for dying."

For the first time Boyfriend decided to speak to this man.

"W-why are you sorry?" Boyfriend said small tears coming out of his eyes.

"Well I messed up the flow." Garcello said.

"Besides it's my fault."

"I-" Garcello cut him off.

"Don't stress it little man I didn't want this thing killing you." Garcello said.

Soon another song started playing and as they sung more and more tears flooded Boyfriend's face.

Boyfriend dropped the mic still singing ran to Garcello and hugged the ghost.

Garcello hugged back looking down smiling and fading away.

After Garcello faded away Boyfriend looked down and saw a pack of cigarettes.

"Boyfriend are you ok?" Girlfriend asked.

"Girlfriend." Boyfriend said sadly

As soon as he called her name he started sobbing uncontrollably as Girlfriend tried soothing him.

"Boyfriend I'm sorry for your loss." Girlfriend said hugging him.

Boyfriend looked at the package for the cigarettes and knew just what to do.

Boyfriend pushed himself off of Girlfriend saying sorry im the process.

"Boyfriend what are you doing?" Girlfriend asked as she ran after him.

"Doing what Garcello would've wanted!" Boyfriend yelled stopping at a bridge.

He held out the packet of cigarettes and threw them in anger and hugged Girlfriend while crying.

"Shh, shh, it's not your fault you didn't want to kill him." Girlfriend said consoling him again.

The two walked to Girlfriend's home and Girlfriend gave Boyfriend a goodbye kiss.

"Daddy." Girlfriend said looking sad at Daddy Dearest.

"What is it sweetheart, did your Boyfriend die?" The mad dad said excited.

"No but a friend of his is." Girlfriend said making her father's expression change from happy to depressed.

Boyfriend walked down the street not knowing what to do, mabye just go to sleep in his place.

As he continued walking he looked around and saw the church and how happy Sarv looked being with someone she cared about.

The same went for Ruv to an extent.

He could name all the people he knew and they would be really happy.

Except him right now he just felt empty and went to a local doughnut shop and ordered a bunch of doughnuts.

"Exuse Me mister, I hope I'm not bothering you but you look sad." A little girl that smelt like apples said.

"Yeah I don't want you to worry too much kid." Boyfriend said not wanting to speak in beeps and just wanting to munch on donuts and drink tea.

"Don't worry I'm a strong person." She said again as a giant macron came behind her and barked.

"I lost something." Boyfriend said eating another doughnut.

"Oh I can help, what did you lose?" She asked.

Boyfriend froze up and as he did that his throat became dry.

"A friend." Boyfriend said as a tear ran down his cheek.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know mister, if it makes you feel better I know someone who can help you with your loss." She said looking sad as well now.

"It's fine your just a kid you didn't know, besides it's my fault anyway." Boyfriend said trying to comfort the kid.

"Well if you want to go to the guy I told you about he's usually at the basketball court around the park." She said giving a smile.

After that encounter Boyfriend gave the apple girl who's name turned out to be pompom a few doughnuts and decided that his next days he's going to find this guy.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend were walking down the street on their way to the park

"Oh Boyfriend, your such a sweetheart." Girlfriend said carrying him around.

"Whaddya mean?" Boyfriend asked still being carried.

"Well you have a tendency to uhh, make people your friends." Girlfriend said and now that he realized it he was.

Despite the fact that nearly everyone he knows has tried to kill him or threatened him like Pico, Hank, and Ruv all three of them tried to kill him at some point.

"Yeah I guess that being with Pico helped me out in dangerous situations." Boyfriend joked.

Girlfriend gave him a smile as the continued their way to the park.

Until Boyfriend smelt something that smelled like... Smoke.

"Uhh, Girlfriend how about we take a left out into that alleyway." Boyfriend said awkwardly.

"Well I guess we can do that." Girlfriend said putting down Boyfriend.

Whitty ripped a picture of the man who he could call a friend and let it burn.

"Beep." A stranger said behind him.

"Huh"

Whitty looked behind him seeing a kid with blue hair and a red hat.

"Beep boop." The kid said.

"Who-"

"Oh, it's just you two." Whitty said now recognizing the two, the blue one was Boyfriend while the girlfriend of his was... Girlfriend pretty dumb name to be honest.

Whitty saw them in multiple newspapers in headlines such as, "demon in Nevada defeated by two teenagers." Or "war in Utah won by spikemen." And his favorite because it was so damn halarious, "teenager gets wet at McDonalds." He didn't know why they put that in spilling water or pop is a fairly common thing.

"Would you kindly leave me alone? I don't want anyone knowin I'm here." Whitty asked politely not wanting attention.

"Beep boop babby." Boyfriend beeped.

Whitty sighed knowing that there was no way out of this.

*After Lo-fight.*

"Okay we did it, are you happy?" Whitty asked annoyed.

"Bo."

"Don't make me do this." Whitty said.

"Boo bee spap skdoo." Boyfriend beeped

"How about you go die in a ditch instead." Whitty said done with the kid.

*After overhead*

Whitty had enough this was going nowhere.

He decided to go BALLISTIC.

Boyfriend watched as the bomb man threw his mic and screamed an ear piercing noise.

"Enough, I've been forced into a viscous cycle for things out of my control." He said as his eyes became playstation controller buttons.

"Curse you and the filth that brought you into this world!" He yelled even angrier.

"Beep." Boyfriend simply beeped showing no signs of intimidation but in the back of his mind he knew why he was doing this. The smoke, it reminded him of who he lost not just Garcello but his brother as well.

*After Ballistic*

Whitty breathed heavily, steam coming from his mouth he had enough of this and couldn't take it anymore.

"Alright David keep getting those suction cup markings off my tower!" Business Guy yelled scaring David so much that he threw the water bucket.

Whitty's fuse was almost fully burned he was bout to explode.

Until he felt calmed, and wet.

"Damn it." Whitty said kicking a rock.

He honestly despite still being angry at the kids, until he heard sirens from who else the greater good.

"Shit shit shiiiit." Whitty said realizing that there's a Dead end.

"Beep boop." Boyfriend said pointing at a garbage can.

"What are you saying!" Whitty yelled at him.

"Just get in the damn thing." Boyfriend said grabbing his leg.

Whitty thought about it, and by that I mean he ran to the thing and yeeted himself inside.

Boyfriend stood still as he saw a bunch of soldiers pass by.

"Exuse Me citizen but have you seen an eight foot man with a bomb for his head?" One of them said

"Bo."

"Keep looking he couldn't have gotten far."  He said to his soldiers.

After a while the men left and Whitty was home free, you know what I mean.

"Well thanks Boyfriend-"

"Wait howdoya know me."

"Do you watch the news?"

"Nah that shit sucks always depressing."

That explains a lot Whitty thought.

"Well you can go home now." Boyfriend said.

"I can't I don't have one." Whitty said fast as the song.

"Hmm, I know just what to do." Boyfriend said.

Pico and Nene were playing smash bros Pico was joker and Nene was hero.

And she used kamakazi.

"Hero wins!" The announcer yelled as Pico threw his controller at Nene.

"You fucking bitch I'm glad that Lila's taking care of Pump right now because of this shit you cu-" Pico yelled before Darnell cut him off.

"If neither of you shut up I'm throwing that shit away." He said taking off some safety goggles.

*Intruder alert*

Darnell sighed in annoyance.

"Grab yo guns and check it out."

Nene made a face.

"And knives Ms. Mother fucker."

When they checked it out it turned out to be Boyfriend, Girlfriend, and another guy who was damn tall, all hung by snare ropes.

"Knock next time." Darnell said disinterested

"Dude what the hell happened?" Pico asked.

"Well meet Whitty, your possible new house homie." Boyfriend said.

"Woah there bucko I already have three stupid mouths to feed and keep in housing what makes this guy so special?" Darnell asked suspiciously.

"Well he uh, can explode when stressed." Boyfriend said awkwardly.

"Anything else, no offense but even if he can nuke a place I would more likely sell him." Darnell said grabbing a mug out of nowhere and taking a sip from it.

"Well first off fucked up, second off he's very tough and can probably punch the shit outta someone." Boyfriend said patting Whitty on the back.

"Hmm, alright but he's pulling his own weights." Darnell said handing a contract to Whitty

Whitty looked down at the blue kid that helped him out.

Soon a girl with puffy hair and a black shirt walked in holding groceries.

"Hey Pico I got the things you asked." She said looking at whitty.

"Who's this guy?" She's asked.

"Oh, I'm Whitty, I'm new here just got hired." He said.

"Well word of advice, don't piss off anyone." She said looking angry about something.

Oh God was it me she didn't like, am I just a freak to her.

"Hey dude, ya wanna play some games?" The orange one he pretty sure was Pico asked handing him a button thingy.

"The hell is this?" He asked.

"A controller."

And so Whitty found a home that he was probably going to stay in for a while since this guy who owns the place is actually a bit threatening.

Chapter Text

"*phew* that was intense." Girlfriend said wiping her brow.

"Yeah did you see that guy, his face was BALLISTIC." Boyfriend said taking deep breaths tired out of his mind.

"Well after giving him a home to stay in as an apology we can be in the park like you wanted." Girlfriend said without taking a breath.

"Hello there are you perhaps up for a game or two?" A voice asked.

A tall robotic figure had approached them he wore a basketball jersey with an orange sixteen on it and his head was a TV with a smiley face and two grey diamond shapes on it most likely to represent cheeks.

"Bee- actually no I'm too tired to do that, but sorry dude I can't, too short to dunk."

"But I am most certain you can funk" The robot said showing an orange microphone

"Oh well in that ca- wait a minute are you not ok with me dating her." Boyfriend said suspicious.

"Negative I have no good reason to dislike you and her."  The robot said smiling.

"All right I can do that as long as it's okay with you Girlfriend." Boyfriend said.

"I don't mind." Girlfriend said.

"Well if Girlfriend is fine with it bring it on, uh, what's your name?" Boyfriend asked.

"My name's Hexraviganza, but you may call me Hex." Hex said spinning his claw

"Alright then Hex let's do this!" Boyfriend said epicly.

*After Dunk*

"That was amazing." Boyfriend said.

"Agreed I feel like I did a banger, no offense but you were great too." Hex said happily.

"None taken, in fact your possibly the best bot, nay the best dude who  been tried to kill me yet." Boyfriend said.

But yet after saying that he remembered Whitty the bomb that didn't mean any harm and just wanting to be left alone, and... Garcello the man who died due to Boyfriend's Idiocracy and lack of understanding.

"Exuse Me but are you ok?" Hex asked derailing Boyfriend's train of thought.

"Uhh, yeah let's do the next song." Boyfriend said surprised.

*During the beat drop of R.A.M*

Hex's expression turned from joy to just pure happiness.

*During the end of R.A.M*

The last few beats rang until Girlfriend spoke up.

"Encore!"

Then the two sung out.

And the song ended.

Hex restarted like a cell phone or a computer.

"Wow that was great, the sun gave nice vibes too." Girlfriend said smiling.

"Vibe levels are off the charts!" Hex said happily chilling.

"Yeah, but Boyfriend we should get going, my parents might be worried." Girlfriend said checking her phone.

"Aww, one more song please." Boyfriend said looking at Girlfriend.

"I would be a very happy bot if you do." Hex said begging.

Girlfriend's heart melted at the sight and allowed them to sing another one.

*After hello world*

Boyfriend sighed and looked at Girlfriend who was as tired as him (even though she just sat there).

"Well Hex we should get going, I don't want my balls cut off because her dad thought I was having intercourse with her." Boyfriend said taking a breath.

"How are you not tired." Girlfriend said sounding bored for some reason.

"I'm solar powered." Hex said still smiling.

"Anyway we'll be on our way mabye we'll meet again." Boyfriend said.

"Oh my address is the tallest tower in Philly." Hex said.

"Well take care Hex." Boyfriend said snapping.

"I wi- *kzzt*" Hex said before glitching out.

"Hex!" Boyfriend yelled concerned.

"My s-system, I think I may have a virus." Hex said clutching his head.

"Aren't those dangerous to machines?" Girlfriend asked.

"V-very dangerous, I think it might be trying to take control of the system." Hex said.

"Well is there anything you can do to stop it?" Boyfriend asked extremely concerned for the robot's safety.

"There's nothing I can but, maybe you can, if you input enough note patterns I might go to sleep mode and my antivirus will run in and kill that thing." Hex explained.

"Please you're my only hope right now." Hex begged.

Boyfriend looked down and realized that even though Garcello died, it wasn't his fault, Boyfriend realized that if he didn't do this Hex would be dead.

"Alright Hex I can't leave the coolest bot in the world behind, ya ready?" Boyfriend said with a cocky smile.

"I'm always ready!"

*After Glitcher*

Hex turned off and went on his knees with his screen pitch black.

"Girlfriend you can go home, I got a job to do." Boyfriend said heroically.

"Ok Boyfriend." Girlfriend said not caring about Hex but really liking the way Boyfriend's acting.

"CHUG CHUG CHUG!" Pico yelled as he and Nene slammed the table as Whitty chugged an entire barrel of cranberry juice.

Whitty slammed the entire thing and crushed the barrel with his bear hands.

"Damnit if you keep breaking my barrels I'll brak your face!" Darnell yelled as the door opened.

Pico recognized the figure being Boyfriend carrying a figure bigger than him.

"Boyfriend what are you-"

"Darnell fix this robot right god damn now." Boyfriend said carrying a lifeless robot.

"Why fucking should I?" He asked reaching for his gun.

"He lives in the tallest building here he's most likely rich, now fix him!" Boyfriend said angred.

"Calm yo bitch ass down and tell me what the fuck is wrong with the bot so I can fix him!" Darnell yelled eager to fix the broken down robot.

Pico looked at Boyfriend who had tears in his eyes.

"Hey dude you ight?" Pico asked but not even answering Boyfriend hugged him crying still.

"It's about him isn't it." Pico asked felling ashamed of what he did in the past.

"Listen dude it wasn't your fault, you didn't pull the trigger." Pico said reasuring him.

"No, Pico it wasn't about him, someone else who died because I'm an idiot." Boyfriend said sobbing.

"Bro you're not an idiot, well you are but you most likely didn't mean to kill him, what happened anyway?" Pico asked as he noticed Whitty approach the conversation.

Boyfriend explained about a guy named Garcello who he "pushed too hard" when really it was lung cancer.

"So wait you rap battled me because you witnessed a friend die from lung cancer." Whitty asked sounding concerned.

Boyfriend nodded as Nene handed him some green stuff.

"Woah that's fucked up, I'm sorry for your loss." Whitty said, to be honest he still didn't like getting approached at but he felt bad for the kid.

"Hello friends!" A robotic voice yelled out.

Boyfriend looked up seeing Hex and ran to him giving a hug for the mechanical figure.

Fortunately for him the robot hugged back.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had taken a visit to Girlfriend's house.

"Boyfriend how've you been feeling?" Girlfriend asked looking at him.

"Well Hex is ok wich is great."

"Well that's good I'm glad you're recovering from the last week." Girlfriend said giving Boyfriend a kiss on his cheek.

Daddy Dearest watched as his sweetheart kissed that blue little rat.

When he heard a knock at the door.

"I'll get it!" Boyfriend said heading to the door and answering it.

"Beep?" Boyfriend asked looking around then finding an old friend of his and Pico's.

"Salutations Boyfriend it's grand to see you once more!" His old friend ENA said.

"ENA what are you doing here?" Boyfriend asked looking at them.

"Pico educated me about your situation and I want to help." ENA said.

ENA showed Boyfriend 3 tickets for something.

"Wow, what are they for?" Boyfriend asked.

"Well you see my friend, these are for the best trainer in the world, nay the universe, no the ga-" ENA said before the classical mad dad showed up to ruin everyones day.

"Alright what's going on here?" Daddy Dearest asked angred.

"Salutations sir I am here to take my friend here to the best trainer in the Galaxy." A Picasso painting person said.

"Wait would he possibly perish?" Daddy Dearest asked.

"Oh no no no noo, no no no no no no not at all." She said.

"Will he be injured?" Daddy Dearest

"It is possible but it'll be mostly to help him become stronger." She said again.

Daddy Dearest thought it through and decided that if Boyfriend is gonna be stronger and he might break a few bones due to his wimpy shrimpyness.

"Sure you can go with my sweet little bundle of joy." Daddy Dearest said chiller than a freezer.

"Oh, thank you good sir, you will not be regretting this decision." The Picasso person said with joy.

Pico had finally got the text from ENA saying that she and Boyfriend will be at the stadium to watch the fights against the most powerful man who lives on earth.

"Hey Nene." Pico asked his silent friend.

Nene grunted and looked in his direction.

"Could you handle my things for me?" Pico asked.

But before she could answer pico put down some boxes with scrap metal and electronics and ran off.

Nene grunted in anger.

Carol had gone to the bar to see her newest pal Whitty.

She walked in and saw the bomb sitting on a stool drinking juice.

"God damn, this juice is the shit!" He said taking a swig.

"I think you mean the 'bomb'!" Carol yelled chuckling.

"I don't get it." Whitty said.

"Y'know cause you're a bomb and the juice is the best." Carol explained.

"By the way I wanted to go somewhere and thought you would enjoy coming with me." She said presenting tickets.

"Uhh, sure I'd l-like that." He said.

"Hey Nene, could you do me a favor and do my tasks for me?" And once again before she could answer the two bolted and she had enough of this shit and pulled out a rope.

Boyfriend, ENA, and girlfriend had made it to the stadium owned by Nintendo, and girlfriend and ENA had been getting along well, it did make Boyfriend happy knowing that they're getting along.

"So ENA tell me about this trainer." Boyfriend asked.

"Well my dear friend, I studied about him and found out that two people have beaten him and are still alive today."

"Wait what."

"Well without dying of injuries, anyway one is known as a god among men, it was said that he never flinched once." ENA said with excitement.

"Ok but about the injurys." Boyfriend said.

"Oh don't worry you'll be rapping against him, so the only possible injury is your voice box." ENA said reasuring.

"Well in that case who's the second guy or girl?" Girlfriend asked.

"I-" ENA said stopping herself.

"I don't know, he's been lost to time not even the trainer knows." She said crying.

Boyfriend felt bad now he'd seen this before 11 times in fact but he didn't want her to cry when she tried to help him.

"Uhh, well that's not too bad ENA you didn't know." Boyfriend said.

ENA stopped crying and went back to her cheery self.

"You're right now onward to your training friend!" ENA yelled in excitement.

After signing multiple waivers the trio went inside to a metal detector room.

Although inside their arms started to disappear.

"Uhh, what's going on." Boyfriend asked

"Oh, do not fret friends this is normal in most Nintendo parks, resorts, and establishments use this technology to make you feel like a MII." ENA said reassuringly.

Matt had just knocked out his second to last opponent and bathed in the glory of the glove as the crowd cheered for him.

He was a master at everything, except tennis but he could punch a stomach and it would hurt more than a kick to the balls.

"Now is Matt's final opponent except this time it's not sports!" The announcer yelled hyping up the crowd.

What? Matt thought about what he just heard.

"Now I want you all to welcome Boyfriend!" The announcer yelled as three people were elevated on the stadium.

Two of them were ladies most likely not this "Boyfriend' character the announcer talked about.

Then the blue haired kid showed his mug.

"I will be cheering you on friends!" The tallest one yelled as she left to the bleachers.

"Welcome to the arena, I will be battling you today although it's really just televised training, what am I supposed to train you for anyway?" Matt asked welcoming Boyfriend in the process.

"Oh nothing too hard just rapping." The girl who didn't leave said.

"Beep!" The kid said in confidence.

"Well let's start with a warm up, show me what you got!" Matt yelled.

*After light it up*

Pico had made it to the stadium showcasing the fights seeing that the last one is happening now.

He found ENA but couldn't see Boyfriend

Carol and Whitty had made it to the MIIFICATION room where your arms disappear.

Carol wanted to make sure that the bomb didn't get stressed out due to confusion although it didn't go too well.

Matt took a good look at the kid that had just beat him and smiled, he saw potential in the kid and thought of another song to use.

"Are you feeling the heat yet?" Matt asked.

"Boop"

"Alright this is a long one, are you ready?"

"Bap bop."

*After Ruckus*

Carol and Whitty despite the crying made it into the stadium where they saw a distressed Pico and a Picasso painting lady.

"Pico, what are you doing here?" Carol asked.

"One sec, ENA these guys are Carol the one with the stupid haircut, and that tall binch is Whitty who's terrible with socializing." Pico said bitter.

"Salutations sir and madam, it's a pleasure to meet you." The one Pico addressed as ENA said.

"Uhh, hi, Pico why are you so stressed?" Whitty asked concerned.

"*Sigh* ENA thought that it would be a good idea to put Boyfriend up against the most powerful man on earth!" Pico yelled angered.

"Oh Pico it's fine no one is going to possibly be hurt during this." ENA said.

"So you're friends with mass murderers and shit like this." Carol said sarcastically.

"Shut up before I throw you off the place." Pico joked.

Boyfriend did a little Victory dance and looked at Matt who threw shit at em.

The shit was armor and a sword.

"I see you have experience, I kinda went easy on you, y'know to avoid lawsuits, but seeing how you handled that last one I think it's time to see how well you multi task." Matt said putting on his own armor.

Pico, Carol, Whitty, and ENA all watched as the Mii put on armor and brandished his sword.

That's when ENA started crying.

"Oh no Boyfriend's going to die and it's awl my fault." ENA cried into her hands.

The other three looked at each other and wondered what to say, when she sobbed again.

*After Target practice*

After the song ended Boyfriend was actually able to focus better on the sword fighting wich actually started helping until Matt did an unknown type of attack, slashing and dashing where he moved too fast for Boyfriend to see or counter.

The trainer repeatedly attacked him to where he could block only sometimes before getting hit again and again luckily the armor did it's job until it cracked open.

Luckily a whistle blew out and Matt stopped in his tracks.

"Boyfriend has been disqualified due to the armor breaking!" The announcer yelled as the crowd cheered.

"Although this means that Matt has received a penalty due to destruction of an important peice used to make sure noone gets hurt!" The announcer yelled again.

Boyfriend got up which felt awful, mabye due to the bruises all over him.

Soon he saw not just Girlfriend and ENA, but Pico, Carol, and Whitty too.

"Dude what the hell were you doing, you could've gotten your blue ass killed!" Pico yelled shaking the poor guy.

"I'm sooo sowwy Boyfwiend!" ENA sobbed hugging him.

"Dude you are possibly the most resilient force a human could be." Whitty said jokingly helping him up.

"Wow thanks I really am glad you guys came, and by the way ENA it's okay." Boyfriend said.

"Doughnuts are on me!" Girlfriend yelled out as they all went to the doughnut shop.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had went to McDonald's with Girlfriend making this their second McDonald's date, although Boyfriend preferred Wendy's.

When they got in it looked a tad bit off first of all there was a bunch of clouds, second the items that had been removed from the menu where actually on it

Third, he saw a familiar looking hat and decided to check it out.

"Ok bye Boyfriend I'll see you at the table!" Girlfriend yelled going to order.

Boyfriend went around the corner too see two stickmen talking, well only one was talking the other just nodded.

They both were around one man, one Boyfriend couldn't forget...

Garcello.

"G-garcello, but you're dead!" Boyfriend said really confused about it.

"Oh shit, little man how'd you get here?" Garcello asked concerned.

"Uhh, I donno." Boyfriend said calmly.

"Well I guess you're just asleep, anyway I guess since your here I gotta ask you a favor." Garcello said taking a bite outta a Big Mac.

"Yeah anything dude." Boyfriend said eager to help the man out.

"You see I have two friends that most likely don't know that I'm dead." He said grabbing some chicken nuggets and eating them.

"Well who are they?" Boyfriend asked.

"Well one of them are pretty easy to find his name is Hex he's at the-" Garcello was cut off by Boyfriend.

"Oh I know that guy." Boyfriend said happily.

"Well I guess that must've been expected but the other one she's usually easy to spot but hard to find." Garcello said.

"Oh what's her name?" Boyfriend asked.

"Annie, she's about this tall, black hair, a cat ears thing, and carries around a bottle of liquid." Garcello said.

"Alright, where am I anyway?" Boyfriend asked.

"Welcome to the ghost McDonald's where all the removed items are still on the menu, for better or for worse." Garcello said shuddering at the spaghetti.

"Wait if this is the McDonald's ment for ghost then am I, dead?" Boyfriend asked.

Garcello then looked down and smiled.

"Eh, most likely you're just asleep and in a short term coma." Garcello said calmly.

"But yeah when you find Annie and Hex tell them they were great friends to me." Garcello said heartwarmed.

"You too little man, don't let my death make you think it's your fault cause it ain't." Garcello said tipping his hat.

After that Boyfriend felt surrounded by light and felt a huge pain in his head and opened his eyes slightly seeing a lot of his friends surrounding him.

"Boyfriendyou'reokIwassoworried" Girlfriend yelled hugging him.

"My god you actually lived." Sarvente said baffled.

"Honestly I'm not happy at all about this." Ruv said staring blankly into the abyss.

"What happened anyway last thing I remember was that we were eating doughnuts and I felt a pain in my throat." Boyfriend said rubbing his forehead.

"Yeah, dude you coughed up blood because of the armor break done by Matt bruising you." Pico explained grossed out.

"Yeah it was disgusting, you were out for a week." Carol added to the conversation.

"Woah I was down for that long?" Boyfriend said looking at a vase of flowers from Hex.

"Where's Hex?" Boyfriend asked.

"Oh he was here earlier today and it was just sad to watch him bawling about you dying, he even prayed for your life." Whitty said looking a little saddened.

Boyfriend suddenly remembered what Garcello asked, and he wasn't cheating the dead.

"Girlfriend call Hex please." Boyfriend said.

Girlfriend happily obligated dialing Hex and after a minute Hex ran into the room grabbing Boyfriend and hugging him while mixing the art of talking and crying.

Boyfriend hugged the robot back and explained to him what happened with both Matt and Garcello.

"I see, I will... Check it out with Ms. Sarvente if she pleases." Hex said saddened.

"Very well, sorry for your lost both of you." Sarv said giving Hex pats on the back and bowing her head at Boyfriend.

"Hey Carol do you know anyone who goes by Annie?" Boyfriend asked getting up.

"Well first off, you should be lying down and letting your wounds heal second off yes she lives in the suburbs." Carol said madly.

Soon Darnell walked in injected Boyfriend with something and left without a word.

"Oh wow a convenient way to heal Boyfriend quickly so he can continue his quest." Girlfriend deadpanned without realizing it.

The two lovers had made it to downtown Philly at the suburbs.

Boyfriend was having a tad bit of trouble finding the person since this was the only thing he knew about Annie was that she lives here.

"Wait, Boyfriend I see her!" Girlfriend said excited.

Annie had been walking down the street taking sips of the L I Q U I D periodically.

Until she saw someone approaching her and that someone was Girlfriend.

"Annie, long time no see." Girlfriend said.

"Oh, Girlfriend it's been so long." Annie said remembering how annoying Girlfriend was back in highschool.

"I know right, we have a lot of catching up to do!" Girlfriend yelled hugging her.

"Uhh, personal space please." Annie said nearly suffocating.

"Uhh so you're Annie right?" A voice asked after Girlfriend put her down.

She looked down at a tiny blue haired kid shorter than Carol.

"Oh, I forget to introduce you to my Boyfriend." Girlfriend said picking him up.

Annie finally noticed him from the news and realized that this guy's been on a lot of news headlines.

The most recent one was that he was put in a coma for a week after fighting Matt from wii sports.

"Say, how about a rap little dude." Annie said cringing at her own sentence.

"Uh, sure I don't see why not." The guy said as Girlfriend summoned her speakers.

(Ok so this may seem angsty but during Good enough Annie sings the normal song until she noticed Boyfriend's version is a bit self hurtful and tries to cheer him up.)

*After Good enough.*

"Dude you ok?" Annie asked after hearing how he sang the song.

"Uhh, yeah yeah totally let's just keep up the singing." He said.

*After lover*

"Boyfriend, I think it's time you tell her." Girlfriend said patting Boyfriend on the back.

He looked at Annie who was confused.

"Uhh, I really have something to tell you." Boyfriend said feeling something in his throat.

Annie just looked at him in confusion.

"A friend of mine who was also yours kinda kicked the bucket and he wanted me to tell you, that-" he stopped himself.

"What?" Annie asked concerned.

But instead of answering he just wiped his face off.

"Let's just keep singing." Boyfriend said.

At this point the dude sounded suspicious or just sus.

that thought reminded Annie of playing among us with Garcello, she hadn't seen him in a while actually.

*After Tug of war*

"Boyfriend just tell her!" Girlfriend yelled a bit ticked off.

He sighed as a few tears escaped his eyes.

"Garcello is dead ok!" Boyfriend yelled crying and broken up a bit.

"Wait what, no way your joking, you're not serious are you?" Annie said denying it but deep down knowing it's true.

Boyfriend just nodded his head left and right.

Just like that Annie's world broke Garcello, dead how, did Girlfriend do it, or was it that Boyfriend guy?

It makes sense a little bit if you look at it from a different perspective, he probably  stabbed him, shot him, or even set gar on fire with his own lighter.

Oh God he probably could've done horrible things to poor Garcello.

She chugged the L I Q U I D in a panic.

Boyfriend had started walking away with Girlfriend saddened by that reminder until he heard her voice.

"Stop it right there you little scumbag!" He heard her yell.

They turned around to see Annie who was taller than before and she was already tall.

"I know what you did you little-" she stopped herself and threw a mic at Boyfriend for one last rap battle.

"One more time!" She yelled.

Boyfriend grabbed it and smile cocky hiding his concern for her.

*After anniemal*

Annie had taken one last sip of that good shit.

Boyfriend watched as the girl transformed into... Sully from monsters Inc?

"Bro you look like Sully from monsters Inc." boyfriend said with some sass.

"Shut it, I've had it with you, you'll pay for what you did to him!" She yelled raising her fist to crush the blue haired boy.

"Annie stop!" Someone yelled at her.

It was Girlfriend.

"I've known Boyfriend for the longest time and he never hurt someone physically, in fact if you think he killed Garcello your wrong, in fact Boyfriend was depressed when he died, it was lung cancer that killed him!" Girlfriend yelled standing in front of Annie.

Annie stopped and looked down at Girlfriend, could she really trust her, she was the daughter of Daddy Dearest who screwed over lot's of people, but was Gar one of those people, he never was the guy to get on other people, especially those he knew could hurt him.

Annie thought this over and decided that most likely Boyfriend was innocent, but why did she think that?

She soon realized that it was her being just, angry and sad knowing that her best friend had died to smoking.

Boyfriend had watched as the blue monster changed back to Annie who broke down and was sobbing and hugging Girlfriend.

*Bzzt* he checked his phone wich had a text from Sarv about a funeral for Garcello and boyfriend wasn't taking off that offer he made a promise.

*5 days later*

Boyfriend had walked into the church where he saw Hex and Annie along with, Whitty, Carol, and a lot of his friends.

"We are gathered here today to remember the lost spirit Garcello claimed at such a young age." Sarv said filled with sadness.

"But his death will not be in vein and he will still live on within our hearts." Sarv said placing her hand on her chest.

"Would anyone like to give a speech to the departed?" Sarv asked looking around the room.

"I'd like to give one." Boyfriend said shyly he'd never gave a speech before.

"Uh, G-garcello was a-a great man who died because of l-lung cancer, but he didn't deserve it, in fact he deserved a lot better." Boyfriend said stuttering in the middle of his speech.

Garcello watched as Boyfriend gave out his words to his pals until Charles reminded him of something.

"Hey dude Henry, quiz, and I were going bowling today you wanna come?" Charles asked.

"Sure pal in a bit." Garcello said as he looked back down from the ghost McDonald's.

"Not bad little man, not bad."

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had been walking with Pico and Darnell who were taking him to a friend's house.

"So who's house is this?" Boyfriend asked.

"I said I'll tell you when we get there you blue cretin." Darnell said smacking Boyfriend by the back of the head.

"Christ man calm down, he's just asking questions." Pico said.

They made it to a bage house with a red roof and as they made it there a red car pulled up and three men walked out and noticed them.

"Hey Pico, Darnell how've you been?" The one in the Green hoodie asked.

"Eh, pretty good Edd, how've you guys been?" Pico asked looking at the other two men one with a blue hoodie and black eyes are another with a mirror.

Boyfriend grabbed Pico and Darnell and whispered to them.

"Who are these guys?" He whispered to them.

Pico and Darnell smiled smugly and walked away to the trio and started to do something.

"Well there's Tom in the blue hoodie." Pico said.

"He's pretty angry and rude, mabye it's his smarts or his attitude." Darnell continued.

"Although one thing is certain, he doesn't make sense, one half is gibberish and the other one is goobablyblench." Pico finished.

"What?" The Tom guy said confused.

"Matt's the one in the purple hoodie and green over coat." Darnell started a new sentence.

"No one likes him as much as himself, his chin is quite formidable." Pico took Darnell's place.

"And yet he doesn't know that word because he has the intelligence of a kitchen shelf." Darnell finished as Pico laughed.

"Hey!" Matt yelled annoyed.

"And finally Edd the guy in the Green hoodie." You get the pattern.

"He's usually the leader, most likely the first of anyone to poke fun, he's an artist, and loves cola to an unhealthy degree, and he's always trying to make a pun!" The two took turns talking about Edd.

"Yeah most likely due to his linguistic 'Edd' ucation" they said in unison.

"That was terrible." Edd said annoyed.

"Anyway that's Boyfriend my ex." Pico said.

"Huh, nice to meet you Boyfriend, Pico already introduced us but hey new pals are always welcome." Edd said smiling.

They all came into the house and Pico helped with the harpoons Tom had.

"So up for some poker Saturday?" Pico asked.

"Sure I don't see wh-" Tom stopped as they approached a shadowy figure.

"Who goes there?" Tom asked dropping all the harpoons except for one which he pointed at the figure.

"Hello old friend." An old friend of them walked out.

Carol, Girlfriend, and Annie had gone shopping to cheer Annie up.

Carol thought that it was nice of Girlfriend to not only let her boyfriend grieve a bit and to take Annie shopping to cheer her up as well.

"Tord!" Edd yelled in excitement.

"Great wesal in a washing machine, Tord I thought you left." Darnell said in surprise.

"Who is he again?" Matt asked.

"Haha, it's me, Tord." Tord said, he had a red hoodie and a bandage on his left cheek.

Matt just looked at him confused.

"He used to live here." Edd said.

"Yeah used to." Tom said madly.

Matt looked like he was still confused.

"Hey Tord how about you and Boyfriend have a rap battle." Pico said.

"Alright I'm in." Tord said pulling a microphone.

"May the best man win" Tord said.

*After paradox*

"Heh, pretty good bud." Tord said smiling.

"I know right, I've tried to get him on the stage but he just doesn't take the offer." Darnell said annoyed.

"Haha, classic cynical Darnell." Tord said laughing.

"Wow you sure had a lot of adventures without me." Tord said astounded.

"Wait I have an idea!"

"And you guys can come too!" Edd said.

"Beep!" Boyfriend pointed his mic at Tord.

"Alright another one can't hurt." Tord said.

*After Norway but the background changes to Edd's world eddisodes*

"Alright so when are you leaving again?" Tom asked annoyed.

"Leaving, ha no, I'm moving back in." Tord said bubbly.

Tom gasped in anger.

"So Edd can I have my old room back?" Tord asked.

"Sure I don't see why not." Edd said in his usual chipper tune.

"No way that's my room." Tom said even madder.

"You can have your old room." Edd said still chipper.

"You turned my old room into a swimming pool." Tom said pointing at a door saying guest room.

"Heh, why don't you sleep on the sofa." Tord said throwing a cube at Tom that became a chair.

"You know what screw you guys, I'm going to find a place of my own." Tom said walking out annoyed.

Tom walked out the door to the house and went twords the urban parts of Philadelphia.

In the distance they heard two guys having an unintelligible conversation.

"Hey how about we watch the return of the insane zombie pirates from hell four!" Tord asked.

"Wait Boyfriend hasn't seen any of the movies." Darnell said.

"Eh, he'll be fine, besides those movies barley have any continuity." Pico said patting Boyfriend on the back.

*Two hours later*

Boyfriend looked around and realized that the call of nature struck again.

Boyfriend tugged Edd on one of his pant legs and pointed for the bathroom.

"Oh, it's right next to Tord's room." Edd said.

"Pico could you take Boyfriend to the bathroom?" Edd asked.

"Oh sure." Pico said grabbing Boyfriend's hand and directing him to the bathroom. This was honestly better than going in a church and rapping against a nun and a Russian.

When Boyfriend got out he saw Tord in the hallway moving something.

Tord had removed a painting on a painting and pressed the button revealing the secret room with all of his old weapons and his greatest achievement.

"Finally I will be complete again muhaha." He said to himself.

"Beep"

Tord turned faster than a Wii fit trainer.

"Oh, I didn't see you there." Tord said defensive.

"Tord what the hell is all this?" Pico asked suspicious.

"Look how about we have a rap battle and we don't talk about it afterwards." Tord said worried about what Pico saw.

"Ight" Pico said squatting down and grabbing a boom box.

*After norski*

Edd, Matt, and Darnell all gathered in the room where the three guys were.

"Uh, Tord what is this?" Edd asked.

"You don't need to worry about this!" Darnell said in a panic.

"Oh, this is just my old laundry room, hehe." Tord did a save

Matt looked around and looked astounded.

"Buttons!" Matt yelled starting to press them

"Wait no do-" Darnell tried to stop it but was interrupted by a boxing glove to the croch.

"Hey Matt bet I can press more buttons than you." Edd said teasingly.

"Oh yeah well I can beat you with this huge red one." Matt said before Tord caught his hand.

"Stop touching it!" Tord yelled before punching Matt in his face.

Everyone stayed silent except for Darnell who was sighing in pain.

"Wow what a mess, how about we all get some ice cream." Tord said.

"Or better yet how about this, Edd how about you and Matt get it while me and the other guys make some popcorn." Tord said innocently.

"Uh, alright." Edd said uncomfortable with the situation.

Boyfriend watched as Edd and Matt who had a black eye walked out and looked at the man who was once a cheery guy.

"Alright kid that's it you almost revealed my secrets and all in all you pissed me off." He reached for his mic and put it in a shotgun.

"Now you've dug yourself into a grave." Tord said pointing it at Boyfriend's face.

"Bep"

Boyfriend wasn't phased by this guy's empty threats, and by that he means mama didn't raise no bitch.

He shoved the gun away from his face and pointed the bird directly at Tord.

"Alright so, you're a moving target eh, let's see how much you move when you're dead on the floor." Tord threatened.

*During Target*

Tom had gotten left out of every house he tried to buy or get, he was just alone until something happened a paper flew over to him.

On it was the reveal of it being a wanted poster for... Tord?

Oh no.

Annie had been shopping with. Both of her high school friends and it was kinda nice.

"Hey Edd look a phone!" A guy with a hoodie and overcoat said holding a banana.

He held it to his head and shocked himself by saying Mr president.

"Oh hey Matt look it's Tom." The Edd guy said.

"What?" The Matt guy said confused.

Edd's chipper look turned into one of concern.

"I think something's wrong."

*After Target*

"*Grr* why you little-" Tord said before being cut off by who else, classic stupid Tom.

"Oh Tom, what are you doing here?" Tord asked at first surprised but then just annoyed.

"Funny I was going to ask you the same thing." Tom said pulling up a wanted poster.

"Huh, Tord I didn't know you were that illegal." Darnell remarked.

"I knew it you trigger happy psycho!" Pico yelled putting Boyfriend behind him.

"Beep boop skibity bop mdada." Boyfriend beeped.

"Alright fine you got me, I only came back to get something I left behind." Tord said raising his hand at the big red button he smacked Matt because of earlier.

"Wait Tord don't!" Darnell yelled but it was too late.

Suddenly a tube came from the ceiling and ejected... A hat.

"My hat."

"Wait that's what you were shooting Boyfriend for." Pico said angred.

"Well yeah what'd you think it was?" Tord asked.

"Heh, yeah."

"Besides it goes really well with my giant robot." Tord said grinning.

"Heh, whoo- wait what?" Tom said.

"Oh shit!" Darnell said knowing what's about to happen.

He pressed the button and was sucked into the tube as the earth started rumbling.

"Shit we need to get the fuck outta here!" Darnell yelled terrified.

Tord entered what he and Darnell called project Tordbot, something that was going to be sold out, but Tord had other plans.

He got out of the house and decided that the world was plagued enough from these idiots.

He fired the gun hand at the house and blew multiple holes in it.

"Tord!"  He heard Edd yell.

"Oh, Edd sorry about the house I just couldn't leave this behind, or leave them alive." Tord said manically.

"But I thought we were-, I thought we were friends!" Edd yelled feeling betrayed.

"Ha no, what would I need friends for when I got this!" Tord yelled.

Boyfriend and Pico had miraculously survived the house getting shot along with Darnell and Tom.

"Hey sunshine lollipops!" Tom yelled getting Tord's attention.

"Have a seat!" Tom yelled throwing the chair cube.

But it did nothing.

"Oh shut up!" Tord yelled before launching a missile at the house and blowing up both it and Tom.

"Ugh just die you little rats!" Tord yelled firing more missiles at the other three guys.

Pico being the badass that he shot two of them redirecting both of them

Sarvente was watching the glory of God's green earth letting a beautiful butterfly land on her finger and take off like the wonder it is.

Until it was peirced by a missile.

"Ruv!" She yelled.

Ruv walked out of the church and was somewhat surprised by the butterfly killed by the missile.

Sarv then grabbed him and flew at the Philadelphia suburbs.

Boyfriend grabbed his mic and pointed it at Tord.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled as he pointed at the giant robot.

"Oh, your still alive, unfortunately." Tord said annoyed with his shotty results.

"Fine one more time has to do it." Tord said smiling.

*During Tordbot specially the part during the eddsworld jingle*

Edd and Matt saw an injured Darnell crawling from the rubble of the house.

"*Ack* Matt the control panel." Darnell said pointing at a stray computer part.

"Darnell what is that thing?" Edd asked.

"*Hack* it's an old project *ack*  Tord and I worked on, it was meant to be sold for a shit load, *cough* but Tord apparently wanted domination of the world." Darnell said coughing up blood.

Matt had just started button mashing enough to make a melee player blush until Edd joined in and Tord started freaking out.

*After Tordbot*

Edd and Matt noticed that their neighbor Jon was dead but if that was Jon.

Their train of thought was cut short by a laser beam destroying the pannel.

Boyfriend had watched as the man in a giant robot had flown away.

Until he noticed the flying nun carrying a Russian man who was being fearful about the circumstances he was in.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled at the duo pointing at the giant robot.

*Two minutes later*

Sarv was carrying Boyfriend up to the robot witch wasn't hard.

They got next to the cockpit and Sarvente kicked the glass breaking it open and threw Boyfriend in the bot.

"BEEEEP" Boyfriend screamed attacking Tord.

"Agh get off me- you little- brat!" Tord yelled spinning the robot and smacking the nun into next week, no not really just briefly knocking her out.

Finally Tord got the kid off him and put held him over the ground.

"Heh, kid I honestly thought you were as weak as a hand pistol, but it turns out I was wrong." Tord said dangling the kid.

"Be-"

"Shh, don't worry I'll make it quick." Tord said loosening his grip.

"You classic stupid kid." Tord said releasing his grip and dropping Boyfriend.

"So long old friends!" Tord said spitefully.

"I am not your friend!"  Tom yelled fireing a harpoon at the robot's chest causing it to explode.

"Told you that harpoon gun would be useful."

"Wait a minute." Pico said before Sarv landed in front of him.

Pico looked up to see that Boyfriend was falling.

Boyfriend had seen the robot explode but also felt the air go against him as he fell from the air that Tord dropped him from.

Until he felt something else something solid on him.

He blacked out for a few seconds.

As he opened his eyes he was surrounded by Pico, Darnell, girlfriend, and several other people.

Annie and Carol had ran there as fast as possible.

After a while they all looked at the destroyed house and looked at Edd, Tom and Matt.

"So I guess we need to find a new place don't we?" Edd asked looking at the rubble.

"Well I did Dr find a place while looking for one."

Paul and Patryck had drove Tord's car to where the saw most of the giant robot only to see a clown and a scarecrow helping Tord from the pile.

They both had collars on them and the scarecrow was holding a parasol.

"You help us?" The clown asked.

Paul and Patryck looked at one another.

"Are you here to help us is what my clown friend is trying to say." The scarecrow said before the two nodded and helped Tord into the car when the clown gave them medals of sorts.

Boyfriend watched as Tom introduced them to the new place.

He could tell things were going to go up.

Tord woke up in a dark room with something around his neck.

"Mr. Larson please proceed too the room on your north." A voice demanded.

He obliged and went to a room populated by two other... Things?

One was easily recognized as Tricky the psychopathic clown with a kill streak, but the other was a scarecrow that's it.

"What the, what are you things."

"Oh, you're awake and I'm glad the arm surgery went well." The clown said.

Tord checked his arm and found it had been removed he also couldn't see that well.

"What the hell happened?" Tord asked

"Your giant doohickey-"

"Giant robot" he corrected the scarecrow.

"Yeah yeah giant rObot blew up knocking you unconscious.

"We drove you back here to be a part of the fucking idiots that captured us." Tricky said.

"Don't you have a PID?"

"That's the thing red leader, I don't have it anymore it was removed by either these clowns or someone else.

"I can assure you that we didn't take it Mr. Hoffnar, and as for you Tord you are with them due to you being a danger to humanity." A mysterious voice said as a door opened.

"Who are you?" Tord asked.

"I am Gabriel Updike, and this is the greater good."

"Wow what a name sounds pretty offensive-" Tord was interrupted by a hand grabbing him.

"Spelled D I K E." The man said revealing himself.

He was a cloud with a fancy suit and beside him was Tord's own lackeys.

"Paul, Patryck what are you doing?" Tord said examining them resulted in seeing they had collars as well.

Updike dropped Tord and pressed a button the results were quite "shocking".

"Here's the deal Mr. Larson, your targets are these people." Updike said handing him a list of people, a bomb, a ice cream demon, a little girl, and his old friend Darnell.

"Do this and you will earn your pardon." He said walking away.

Updike felt disgusted by what he just did, a pardon that's a laugh, he would be disposed of as soon as he did the mission he hated what he had to do.

He never enjoyed killing but sadly it was a part of his job.

It was cruel, unforgiving, and scarring.

He never wanted to kill but now it's just a part of the job.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had been on a hill watching the sun all that good stuff.

"Oh Boyfriend your the best one ever." Girlfriend had been smothering the boy with compliments.

Until they saw someone who looked like a YouTuber.

"Hi I'm Bob do you want to rap battle?" Bob asked.

"Bep bee skibity bop mdada baop."

"K"

*After sunshine*

"Okay I'm angy now." Bob who was now angy said.

"Mmmmmm, you kinda look like dream." Boyfriend said smugly.

"Hey he do be lookin Little bit sussy." Girlfriend said.

*During withered*

Bob was now mad

"Jeez calm down your acting like joe." Boyfriend said.

"Who the fuck is joe?"

"Joe mama."

"Don't get mad though that would be a deez thing to do." Girlfriend said.

"What's a deez?" Bob asked.

"Deez nuts."

"That's it I transform to my ultimate form." Bob said covering himself in black.

This was the ultimate form he not only summoned and stabbed pico, but could also say the n word

"Ah, oh god I'm bleeding out what did you assholes do this Time, Jesus Christ." Pico said in pain.

*After run*

Bob didn't know what to do so he decided to let the kid off the hook.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had gone to the arcade with friends, literally all of them human, demon, Russian you name the species they're in.

In fact Hex invited friends of his own.

"So you're a robot too?" Whitty asked a robot ." similar to Hex but with a green face and jacket.

"Yeah, name's Cyrix nice to meetcha." Cyrix said pointing finger guns.

"Do you like the spooky month?" Skid asked Pompom.

"I don't know what that is." Pompom said curiously.

"The time of getting candy" pump said.

"Oh, Halloween I love that time of year." Pompom said gleefully.

"I've never been to an arcade before, is it fun?" Static asked Hex.

"Yes very."

"Trust me static you'll be having so much fun you'll overclock." Cyrix said with a smile.

"Metaphorically of course." Hex added trying to avoid scaring the poor bot.

"Ruv this is exciting." Sarvente said excited to the not as excited Russian.

"I hate this already." Ruv said.

They made it to the phantom arcade where everyone got some tokens, courtesy of Hex of course.

"Alright you guys let's get as many tickets as possible!" Boyfriend said in excitement.

Sarv had gone to the PC room and found a game called DOOM.

Ruv just went to a pinball machine with Daddy Dearest's face plastered on it.

Tom chose a game called collateral chaos where you shoot zombies but not survivors.

Skid and Pump played around with claw games.

"So what should we play first?" Boyfriend asked.

"Hmm, how about dance dance revolution." Girlfriend said as Boyfriend recoiled.

"How about no, I'm more of a singer after all." Boyfriend said nervously.

"Oh c'mon BF we can all try new things." Girlfriend said dragging him before hearing something.

"Yo, you single?" A stranger's voice asked.

"Beep!" Boyfriend beeped angered that someone would have the audacity to yell at a lady like that.

He turned around and saw him.

"Kapi?" Boyfriend said surprised.

"Heh long time no see." Kapi said jokingly.

"I see your dating someone that's just way out of your league." Kapi continued.

"Alright you want Girlfriend for your selfish self huh well I guess we... Have to rap battle." Boyfriend said awkwardly.

"Alright let's-"

"Dude the amount of times people have said that to me." Boyfriend said.

*After wokey*

Ruv had been playing this painball for a while now and it was quite intriguing he always had a fascination with these machines, honestly maybe it was due to the lack of social interaction that felt absorbing.

His train of thought was interpreted by him losing the ball to the hole and getting hit in every man's weak spot, doesn't matter what you are if you're a man and get hit there especially by a metal fist.

Skid and Pump watched as the grown man fell over and curled up in pain.

"Wow that looks painful." Skid said as Pump pulled out a phone and pulled up Among us.

Pump took a seat next to Girlfriend.

"Huh, not bad for a cat." Girlfriend said.

"See even she thinks I was the best one." Kapi said smugly.

"Bruh that literally means nothing." Boyfriend said just making out a huge f you to the cat.

"Alright this time no holding back!" Kapi yelled.

"Beep."

*During beatovin*

Pump had been playing Among us for a while now and saw pink vent and called an emergency meeting.

Boyfriend had been rapping as Kapi kept his flow and needed to be be knocked down a peg, but how?

Boyfriend thought about it and threw his secret weapon at the cat a single finger board.

Kapi at first was surprised and couldn't keep up as Boyfriend did trick after trick while singing.

*After beatovin*

Sarv had approached a downed Ruv who had been writhing in pain.

"Ruv are you ok?" Sarv asked after enjoying the bloodshed of demons.

"Yeah just got hit in the weak spot." Ruv said getting up.

"Oh no, I'm so sorry Ruv, I was so inconsiderate!" Sarv apologized.

"Hey skid what's going on?" Pico asked as the kid ignored him.

"Shut the fuck up, I'm bouta play Deltarune chapter two." Skid said taking a seat on Girlfriend's speakers.

"Huh, would you look at that, what's wrong kitty don't know how to finger board, cause let me tell you fingers can not only board they can please." Boyfriend joked as a distant Tankman laughed.

"T-that literally means nothing!" Kapi yelled losing his cool.

"Man what a hypocrite." Boyfriend said smugly.

"Alright screw it third song now!" Kapi yelled at Boyfriend.

*During the last few parts of hairball*

Boyfriend had been singing this one for a while until he noticed Kapi not being as angry as before and... Actually succeeding in the sacred finger board.

*After hairball*

"But how it took me months years to master the art." Boyfriend said dumbfounded.

"Heh, not as cool as you thought, and honestly you can keep your girlfriend, now it's just between us." Kapi said regaining his cool.

"Damn my dancepad took some damage." Kapi remarked.

"Honestly now I just want to prove that I'm better than you, or him." Kapi said spitefully glaring at a hiding Whitty.

"Oh, I see you befriended pancakes pig" Kapi joked looking at the nun comforting the Russian.

"That was extremely unholy of you!" Sarv yelled.

"Whatever, you up for a final round?" Kapi asked.

"Yeah I'll wipe that smug look off your furry face." Boyfriend said.

Daddy Dearest had made an appearest from h to see the exact opposite of Boyfriend, tall, good fashion sense, and not annoying.

*During Nyaw*

Kapi slowed down on hitting his pad and Boyfriend pulled a sneaky on everyone.

He meowed.

Skid and Pump just then had the most brilliant idea.

When the last meow was about to go down they yelled all together Nyaw.

And everyone meowed except for Tankman who was just disgusted by everyone.

*After Nyaw*

The entire arcade blacked out due to the cat's recklessness and everyone had to leave.

"Well that was fun." Boyfriend said as everyone walked out.

"I was hit in the nuts by a metallic fist just for you to say that." Ruv said more disappointed than ever.

"I played a game that blows just for you to say that." Tom said taking a shot of whiskey from his flask.

"I listened and watched as all of you said fucking meow like dick breathing skin sucking DeviantArtist get on my fucking level!" Tankman yelled at everyone.

The group all just stood silent until they saw some black flying meat moving a few inches per second.

"What the hell is that?" Whitty asked.

"Let me guess you want to eat it?" Darnell said snarky.

"Fuck you, but yes." Whitty said glaring.

The group followed the trail until it ended although c'mon Whitty despite not having a nose could smell food from a mile away.

That's when they found Kapi and Daddy Dearest having a barbecue.

Kapi noticed them and frowned.

"C'mon can't I just enjoy some barbecue with an ex rockstar?" Kapi asked.

"What the hell is going on here?" Pico asked.

"None of yo business carrot head!" Kapi yelled taking a bite of steak as Daddy Dearest just remarked about how that shit was bussin bussin.

Just after that exchange a flat black thing walked out in a chef's hat and carried a tray of that good shit.

"Game n watch could you help me take care of those guys?" Kapi asked.

Game n watch set the trey down at the table and took out a microphone.

He then made an ear piercing noise.

*After flat zone*

"Sweetheart I have made a decision about your love life." Daddy Dearest said.

"I'm not too sure that's how it works." Carol said.

"Well did yooou make a child with a thicc as hell demon Ms. Carol hmmm?" Daddy Dearest said making barley any sense.

"Now I wish you weren't so reasonable." Pico said covering Skid's ears while Nene covered pump's and Cyrix covered Pompom's.

"Anyway Girlfriend you're going to marry Kapi." Daddy Dearest said.

"I believe that love is how Girlfriend feels for someone." Hex said.

"I didn't agree to that." Kapi said uncomfortable.

"Well to bad your go-" Daddy Dearest had been interpreted by Mr. game and watch hitting a nine.

After that whole ordeal Boyfriend and Girlfriend waited at a bus stop for someone.

"So who are we waiting for?" Girlfriend asked as the bus arrived.

"Trust me you'll know him when you see him." Boyfriend said as people exited the bus

Girlfriend waited until she saw a rat with drip and luggage.

"Hey bro." He said to Boyfriend.

"Ritz!" Boyfriend yelled hugging him.

"Oh, are you guys friends?" Girlfriend asked.

"Nah, adoptive brothers." Boyfriend said.

"Oh, well Ritz where are you going to stay?" Girlfriend asked.

"I was going to stay with Boyfriend and chill in his place." Ritz said.

"Uhh, about that." Boyfriend explained.

He explained how he was homeless and lived in a warehouse for a long time and lived off Christmas money and the subway dumpster.

It was at this point Girlfriend's brain did a smart thing.

Daddy Dearest saw his daughter and that pest walking at his door.

"Daddy, I wanted to ask if BF could live with us." Girlfriend said.

"Oh heeeellll no, I will never share the same roof with that boy!" Daddy Dearest yelled pointing at him.

"But daaaaad he's homeless and needs a place to stay." Girlfriend said.

"A no is a no sweetheart now get that pest away from my house." Daddy Dearest said before his wife walked up.

"What's going on now?" Mommy Mearest asked.

"Our daughter wants the Boyfriend to live here." Daddy Dearest said.

"Yeah he's homeless." Girlfriend said.

"Oh, then yeah he can stay here."

"Ok what about his brother?" Girlfriend asked as a rat came up to them.

"Is that a fucking rat?" Mom asked.

"Well you're a fucking demon but you don't see me talking about it." The rat asked.

"Ritz I don't think she ment it that way." Boyfriend said reasuring..

"Ok, deep breaths, deep breaths." Ritz said breathing in and out.

"Names Ritz, Ritz the rat Hatsune." He said holding out his hand.

Mommy Mearest reluctantly shook it.

"So can he live here?" Girlfriend asked.

"Well I guess that he can stay here." Girlfriend's mother said.

"No I'm not living with a rat that'll make more of a mess than that Hank guy.

"Don't worry Mr. Doe eye Dearest Ritz has been through training school." Boyfriend said.

"Mhm, more house broken then a pitbull." Ritz said.

After a while they finally got a room the attic closet wich was still pretty big.

"Goodnight baby bro." Boyfriend said teasingly.

"Yeah yeah good night bud." Ritz said before yawning

Soon the two brothers drifted to sleep getting ready to adventure another day

Chapter Text

Darnell had done it after nights of sleep deprivation and working on Pico's surgery he finished his new computer program.

"Hey dude you've been in there for a while how've you been?" Pico asked.

"Pico I did it I made a working murderous .EXE file." Darnell said clearly deprived of sleep.

"Wow how surprising." Pico said sarcastically.

"Yeah yeah, very funny, but still I can sell it or even better use it on the IRS!" Darnell yelled before laughing maniacally.

"Oh my god."

Darnell grabbed a cartridge and stuck it in the computer and then started typing.

A few minutes later he downloaded the file and ROM hacked the cartridge Wich was a cartridge for Sonic the hedgehog three.

Soon after Carol came in and Darnell saw his opportunity for a test drive.

"Heyo Carol you wanna play some Sonic?" Darnell asked holding a controller.

"Oh, uh sure I guess."

*One playthrough of Sonic.EXE later*

Whitty had been asleep for a long time he actually enjoyed the added protection and whenever any greater good agents came at em hellfire rained.

Whitty honestly never got this much sleep before and it was enjoyable until he heard rhe screaming that bolted him awake and yet pump, the kid he shared a room with besides Pico was sleeping like a rock.

Whitty walked in to see Carol scared and shaking along with Pico trying to comfort her as Darnell just stared at the TV coated in static.

"Carol, you ok?" Whitty asked extremely concerned.

"Don't worry just tell her it's not real." Darnell said adjusting some wires.

That's when Boyfriend, Girlfriend, and a literal rat with drip walked in.

"Heyo the rat's in the house." It said.

"What the fuck is that?" Darnell asked pointing at the rat.

"Eh, it's just Ritz  A.K.A the most annoying rat on earth." Pico said smugly.

"Haha, very funny coming from the edge lord that was somehow more emo than Nene!" Ritz yelled.

Then suddenly a knife flew at Ritz's throat and missed by a few inches.

Girlfriend gasped seeing Carol playing Sonic the hedgehog.

"Carol, did you know that Boyfriend loves Sonic?" Girlfriend said.

Carol stood still frozen in fear.

"Carol!" Whitty yelled in concern.

Suddenly a pair of giant hands grabbed Girlfriend and dragged her into the TV.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled grabbing Ritz and jumping in after her.

"Wait dude I never signed up for thiiiiiis!" Ritz yelled as they fell through and landed in a dreary version of Angel Island.

Boyfriend had seen Girlfriend next to... SONIC!

except he was stabbing Tail's head with a steak.

"Beep!" Boyfriend beeped throwing a mic at the bloody hedgehog.

"Dude I don't think that's a good idea." Ritz said looking around.

The hedgehog picked up the microphone glitching it into a red color.

"Go." He said darkening his eyes.

3, 2, 1 go!

Darnell and Pico watched as the melody started slow and simple.

"Guys what the fuck happened?" Whitty asked caressing Carol gently.

"Well I made a computer program and it's code must've taken over Sonic's body forcing him to slaughter all of the other characters and because of the deleted situation back in two thousand seven he hunted and killed the sentient beings within the game." Darnell said.

"Ok and in-" Whitty was cut off by Darnell shooting a blank.

"First off, shut up, and second the program is homicidal and kills anything that moves."

"Uhh, guys." Pico said looking at the computer.

It was glitching of red static and a hellish laugh came out of it as it turned to Ritz carrying both Boyfriend and Girlfriend as Boyfriend sung at the thing who was chasing them.

"Darnell fucking do something!" Pico yelled as Darnell got to it.

He started typing in a bunch of objects the first of witch was a few trees.

The deformed Sonic threw his microphone and started chopping the trees down more and more inching closer to the trio.

"I'm gonna getchya... I am GOD!" The thing yelled.

"HA.  HA.  HA   HA  HAAAAA"  It demonically laughed as red static bled on the screen

Darnell then chose wrecking balls after all he always struggled with those.

"Get wrecked sanic!" Darnell yelled as he chose three and pressed enter.

Sonic just juggled the balls and threw them away.

Pico watched as Darnell continued to fail to stop that hedgehog.

He then heard a familiar tune the drowning song that used to give him anxiety and as the tune continued Darnell fell from his chair from a jumpscare and the thing filled up with blood.

Darnell got back up and coded it to water and then the most unlikely thing happened... The hedgehog did the spinball death.

Ritz took deep breaths and coughed up blood that hopefully wasn't his.

"Oh *huff* god *puff* what *huff* was  *puff* that?" Ritz asked out of breath.

"I have no- urk" Boyfriend said getting grabbed by the neck.

"You cheated prepare to D I E!" Sonic said before getting hit by a fireball from Girlfriend.

"No one chokes my Boyfriend but me!" Girlfriend yelled charging at the hedgehog as Boyfriend and Ritz covered their eyes.

Pretty much a second before his near death they were teleported out safely.

"Well I guess that happened." Ritz said drinking some water.

"Pico, why did I hear screaming, horror, demonic shit, cussing, and slamming?" Pump asked in his PJs.

"Uhh, I'll tell you when you're older." Pico said.

Pump shrugged and went back upstairs.

Darnell looked at the sonic banging on the glass.

"Ha, not so strong now are you." Ritz said smugly.

Darnell dragged him with the mouse and put him in a folder and labeled it...

Sonic.EXE

Chapter Text

Girlfriend and Boyfriend were playing smash bros with Terry and Ritz.

"Blue team wins!" The announcer yelled.

"Ha!" Ritz laughed high fiveing Boyfriend.

Girlfriend clapped for them as Terry shrugged it off.

"Alright so kid your "Soo good" at playing these gosh darn vimdio gamaes." Daddy Dearest said as Ritz jumped out the window and scurried down the street.

"Well I played the classics so there's no way you can beat I the ultimate peak of perfection!" Daddy Dearest said flexing.

*69 losses later*

Daddy Dearest had lost sixty nine (nice) times to Boyfriend and it was embarrassing and even his henchmen were now betting on who would win.

"Alright, that's it you little punk!" Daddy Dearest yelled opening a portal and kicking the boy in, except he didn't realize that his daughter was on the other fucking side God damnit!

"Uh, sir you do realize that your daughter was on the other side of the kid right?" Carlos asked.

"Oh, fuuuuuuu"

Boyfriend landed on Girlfriend specifically on her lap area.

"Beep" Boyfriend said dizzy as Girlfriend hugged him.

"Should we do it right here?" Girlfriend asked.

"I'd rather you not make out around here, it kinda messes up with the scenery of nothing a bit." A mysterious voice said.

"Beep?"

"Yeah who said that?" Girlfriend asked and simultaneously translated for Boyfriend.

Suddenly a squid guy with a red jacket and blue pants and even a Funkin chain jumped down to greet them.

"Hey everyone Agoti here from the gaming void where the artist come to die and the kingpins are still bathing in riches." This Agoti guy said bowing.

"Wait, Agoti?" Girlfriend said.

"Oh, Girlfriend how ya doing?" Agoti asked squinting at Boyfriend.

"Oh, you got a new Boyfriend, I hope he didn't break anything." Agoti said doing a finger snap.

"Mhm, say why are you in here." Girlfriend asked.

"Oh, y'know just outstaged your folks with that don't mine at night cover we did." Agoti laughed a bit.

"Heh, yeah." Girlfriend said smiling.

Agoti started leading them to his "gamerpad" which he called epic and poggers.

"Welcome to my gamerpad, as you can see there are many chairs knocked around because I get so tilted at the towers.* Agoti said shaking his hands.

"Uh I don't see any towers that are tilted." Girlfriend said.

"Boop"

"Oh that's a great idea, Agoti how about you and BF have a rap fight." Girlfriend said.

"Hmmm, ight." Agoti said summoning a microphone in his hand spinning it then pointing it at Boyfriend.

"Let's do it!" He yelled imitating a drunk.

*After screenplay*

"Hey pretty good little dude, pretty tight bars are whatcha got." Agoti said snapping his fingers.

"Alright I'll bite you outstaged which one?" Agoti asked smiling.

"He beat daddy in smash ultimate." Girlfriend said.

"Cool, with who?" Agoti asked munching on some Doritos cool ranch.

"Steve." Girlfriend said as Agoti gasped.

"You mean Minecraft Steve?" Agoti asked in amazement.

"Bep"

"No fucking way!" Agoti said in disbelief.

"Yeah it's really good with the new cave update." Girlfriend said.

"You're joshing, you're joshing." Agoti said like a puppy.

"Alright you guys, you gotta tell me what happened since I was gone." Agoti said in excitement.

*After parasite*

Agoti looked around and saw a bright light opening within the void.

"Aw shit, it looks like due to our sick bars the portal is opening up to a size that could fit all three of us." Agoti said in amazement.

"Wow who knew that tight bars could be strong enough to open a portal and bend reality?" Girlfriend said saying a smart.

"I know right, I just need it a tad bit bigger to fit my gamerpad." Agoti said packing up his things.

"Alright you just need a little push." Agoti said getting a light bulb.

"Alright this song is pretty tough as wood so just be careful." Agoti said summoning pillars knocking over the one Girlfriend was sitting on causing her to hold on the edge.

"Oh, shit sorry about that." Agoti said.

"Waaah, my nails are dirty." Girlfriend cried as her nails dragged on the rock.

*During A.G.O.T.I, specifically the last part*

Agoti watched as the hole opened enough to fit him, the gamerpad box, and the two newcomers so he decided to push the hardest part.

Boyfriend watched as Agoti

*After A.G.O.T.I*

Boyfriend landed in the street flat on his face it looked like he part of town he fought Annie when she was "liquidized"

He was about to get up before getting crushed by a box of game consoles and physical copies.

"Bowwwch" boyfriend beeped as he crawled out from under the box.

"Jeez, sorry about that." Agoti said scratching the back of his head.

"Beep bo" Boyfriend beeped.

"Well I gotta get out of here." Agoti said grabbing his stuff and walking away.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend waved away for him.

"So you wanna have sex behind that IHOP?" Girlfriend asked.

"Oh fuck yeeeaaah!"

Agoti went to his old house and got it felt so long ago when he was an eighteen year old.

He knocked on the door and waited for it to open.

"Yeah who go-" his brother Aldryx said before noticing him.

"A-agoti, I don't, it can't be." Aldryx said looking at him.

"Heh, kept you waiting huh." Agoti said making a metal gear reference.

"Oh shit, it really is you!" His brother said crying a bit happily.

"Yep, the ultimate alpha gamer." Agoti said cockily laughing.

"Aldryx who's at the door?" A female voice asked.

It was his Manager's wife Nisuka.

"A-agoti, goodness you're back I didn't think- it's been-"

"I know a few years." Agoti said.

"Dude it was only one."

"Oh crud, I didn't have a great time window." Agoti said.

"Well why are you just standing there get inside!" Nisuka said as Aldryx helped him with the gamerpad box.

He went inside before seeing some blue fire from the kitchen.

"Heey Solazar not gonna give your favorite worker a hug?" Agoti yelled at the blue firey man.

"Ah! agoti what have I told you about-"

"Wait Agoti?" Sol asked turning around

"It's really you." He said.

"Yep, as real as I get." Agoti said.

"My lord, where were you?' Sol asked.

"I'll explain when dinners ready."

Chapter Text

Girlfriend and Boyfriend were sitting in her room all alone... Besides Ritz was there and a bit uncomfortable.

"Uhh, if you want I can just leave." Ritz said awkwardly.

"Oh, sure you can leave if you're uncomfortable with me... Showing my large amounts of love." Girlfriend said making Ritz instantly leave the room.

"Well since we're all a-" Boyfriend was interrupted by Ritz opening the door.

"God damnit Ritz!" Boyfriend yelled under the covers.

"Sorry, sorry I just got a note for Girlfriend." Ritz said covering his eyes.

Girlfriend snatched the note and up lefted Ritz outta there.

It read to Girlfriend from Retro and at that moment she gasped and put on her clothes.

"Boyfriend we're going to meet uncle Retro!" Girlfriend yelled in excitement.

"Who's Retro."

"Oh just my music making uncle, oh hey that reminds me we're also probably meeting uncle Kamex and aunt Sakuroma." Girlfriend said in even more excitement.

"And they are?" Boyfriend asked.

"My uncle's romantic partners." Girlfriend said.

"Alright so where are we meeting them?" Boyfriend asked putting his hat on.

"My dad's Taco Bell." Girlfriend said.

The two made their way to a fancy restaurant with the Taco Bell logo on it.

They made it inside and it was the fanciest Taco Bell they saw.

"Wow this is the most beautiful Taco Bell I've ever seen." Boyfriend said before noticing the 18 ft painting of Daddy Dearest in the draw me like a french girl pose holding a rose in his mouth and he was extremely naked with a taco covering his groin.

The two kept walking and saw the friendliest face you can see in this town... Hex.

"Hex what are you doing here?" Girlfriend asked.

"Greetings Boyfriend and Girlfriend I just wanted to see the scenery of the restaurant, I also paid for that guy." Hex said pointing at a guy leaning on a wall.

"Oh, let's just move, away from that guy, just very far away from him." Girlfriend said pulling both of them away.

"So we finally meet up after a full year of hiding." The man said.

"Shit"

"Beep beep boop boop bep?"

"I saw that you were dating another guy already, yet another victim huh?" He said.

"Bep bee po?" Boyfriend beeped looking at Girlfriend.

"Boyfriend this is Tabi my EX boyfriend, and Tabi this is my boyfriend, Boyfriend." Girlfriend said awkwardly.

"Listen dude, this is my battle not yours so get out of my way!" Tabi spat.

"I sense that there is a strong tension that cou-"

"That goes for you too robot!" Tabi yelled.

"Now as for you, you do know she's just using you right?" Tabi asked sounding genuine.

"Bo bee bip bep!"

*After my battle*

"How do you not understand that she's just using you for her own success, like she used me once and now look at me I'm a floating skull with an invisible body I've lo-"

"Shut the fuck up, I'm eating here!" A man yelled angered.

"I hope you get diarrhea from those shit tacos!" Tabi yelled.

"I believe that we can solve this dilemma with just friendship." Hex said trying to stop any possible violence.

"No this is your last chance to leave, both of you, because I won't stop until I get my hands on that little brat, so leave now or face the consequences." Tabi said to both Boyfriend and Hex.

"Beep." Boyfriend said showing that this guy's empty threats didn't mean anything.

"Very well then I guess I will have to kill ALL OF YOU!" Tabi yelled at the three.

He started snapping and the song began.

*After last chance*

"Look I get that you feel betrayed but this isn't going to help anyone, not even yourself." Hex said to Tabi trying to not get killed or just trying to not get his friends killed.

Then the goat skull guy laughed... And pulled out a detonator but stopped himself.

"*Sigh* I am going to miss the nacho fries, eh I'll just get them in the summer." Tabi said at first reconciling with the plan but at the end still going through with it.

He pressed the button and the restaurant blew up into flames.

Boyfriend looked at the chaos in a bit of fear.

He saw that Hex was extremely damaged and Girlfriend was hurt.

"Hahaha, so you survived the explosion huh?" Tabi said.

Girlfriend looked pretty hurt with her dress torn up.

"Boo beep ba?" Boyfriend beeped holding his hand at Girlfriend.

"You -ktz- didn't have to -kzzt- do t-this." Hex said, his vocals were all scratchey and glitched.

"Beep bop skbed, skibity bop mdada." Boyfriend beeped flicking off the madman.

"Grahh, I don't care anymore, I will kill her here and now no matter what!"

"JUST TO MAKE THAT PEICE OF CRAP SHE CALLS HER FATHER FEEL PAIN!"

"JUST DIE!!!"

*After G E N O C I D E*

Boyfriend spat on the ground and flipped the bird again.

"Get out of my way!" Tabi yelled kicking Boyfriend and pulling a knife.

Boyfriend watched as the monster lowered his knife and stabbed Girlfriend in the chest.

"AHHHH hahahaha, ha ha ha." Girlfriend first screamed then laughed.

"W-what?" Tabi said confused.

"That tickles" Girlfriend said.

"But I planned all of this, that's not how this was supposed to go!" Tabi said looking down at the ground.

"You, you knew about this and just played me, for your sick games!" Tabi yelled angered beyond anyone Boyfriend saw before.

Tabi then stabbed Girlfriend's hands to the ground and grabbed Boyfriend by the neck and grabbed a kitchen knife.

"Just-"

*Bang*

A bullet hit the knife out of his hand.

Pico, Darnell, and Nene jumped from the roof and landed perfectly.

Except Nene who landed on a wooden spike on fire.

"Jesus Christ, not again!" Darnell said pissed off.

Straight after a pink portal opened and everyone's favorite Russian man Ruv jumped out.

"*Sigh* alright what did you do this time?" Ruv asked Girlfriend not looking concerned about Boyfriend's safety.

"*Grrr* one wrong move and I slice his throat so open you'll hear his screams out of it.

"Oh hell no!" Pico said cocking his gun.

"Eh, I heard better." Ruv said looking around the burning building and picking up a damaged Hex.

"Oh yeah?" A voice from the ceiling asked.

Suddenly hot cheese flew at the man holding Boyfriend and got his eyes.

"Gah, god damn it, my eyes!" Tabi yelled dropping Boyfriend and trying to rub the cheese from his eyes.

The only good rat jumped out from the ceiling and kept throwing cheese whilst hurling insults at the poor guy.

Pico stopped him and let Ruv finish him off.

"Hey Ruv you think you can take this poser out?" Pico asked.

"Not all Russians are strong and ripped asshole, but yes I can and will." Ruv said before kicking the floor and kicking spiked rubble into the hood of the guy.

They all gathered around the defeated man who was covered in cheese and stuck to the wall.

"You, I'll kill you, all of you, I'll make sure you and everyone else you ever cared about will burn within the firey pits of hell!" Tabi yelled at Boyfriend and Girlfriend.

"Well most of the people he cares about are basically immortal soo." Pico said.

"Ruvyzvat, you know that nun is a-"

"Yes and no I am not breaking the vow."

A second afterwards a portal opened up and dragged Tabi in.

"Well shit that's delt with." Pico said shooting an opening for everyone.

Ruv and Boyfriend were the last ones out and Ruv wanted to make sure Boyfriend would learn something to never forget.

"Listen here punk I didn't want to save you in fact I would have let you die or partake in killing you, but I don't want Sarv getting mad so be greatful that I didn't crush your skull." Ruv said grabbing Boyfriend by the collar and dropping him.

"Oh I see, so you're a pussy?" Boyfriend said.

Ruv flicked him off and went on his way.

Boyfriend saw a gathering of people around the restaurant, examples of a lot of his friends and even some family.

Well when in Rome.

Tabi woke up with a migraine and a sudden distaste for cheese.

Oh yeah he was assaulted with some.

He wandered around until seeing a hallway and entering it made him see a man in a red hoodie and a robotic arm, a scarecrow, and a clown that was also a zombie.

"Oh, look who's awake." The man said with a Russian Norwegian accent.

"How many people does he need?" The clown asked.

"I don't know, what's your name by the way?" The scarecrow asked.

"Tabi"

"Huh, sounds cool."

"Tabi?" A familiar voice asked.

"What the- Agoti the hell are you doing here?" Tabi asked.

"Never mind me what happened to you? You look awesome!" Agoti said.

Tabi looked and noticed the collars on everyone's necks.

"Wait what is on me?" Tabi asked.

"Shock collar" The clown answered.

"Yeah we figured out the hard way, I'm Tord by the way, the clown's Tricky and the scarecrow is Zardy." Tord said as a door opened revealing a cloud man in a white suit.

"Welcome to the greater good you two." He said.

"Oh boy, this guy ag- gaaah" the clown said before being shocked.

"Look I've been through this multiple times so just take the lists and use them." The man said handing Tabi and Agoti lists with multiple people on them.

"And just so you know you will address me as Updike, spelled D I K E." Updike said leaving.

"Hey dude I snuck a 3DS in here." Agoti said before hacking up a storm and puking out a 3ds

Tabi looked at the target list recognizing all of the people on there and he was ready to fulfill his promise to that whiney brat and her Boyfriend.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend had been asleep for a while now but was woken up by a phone buzzing on his chest.

He answered to it and it was Pico.

"Hey Pico what's up." Boyfriend asked rubbing his eyes.

"Uhh, could you get over here some guy came over here and called Darnell the N-word." Pico said.

"Wait is he black?" Boyfriend asked.

"No, he's yellow, I don't mean the racist kind I mean he's literally yellow." Pico said.

"And now he's calling Nene a cunt." Pico said before the phone hung up

"Well I should deal with that." Boyfriend said before his phone rung again this time Sarv was calling.

"Yes?" Boyfriend asked.

"Boyfriend a very unholy being has been cussing in the the church and has been very rude!" She yelled at someone.

"Ok I'll be there after dealing with a guy at Pico, wait a minute, is he yellow?" Boyfriend asked.

"Yes and he looks like a folder." Sarv said pouty.

"Alright I'll be there." Boyfriend said before getting another call from Carol.

"Let me guess, a yellow folder guy has been calling you offensive things and you want me to deal with it?" Boyfriend asked sounding a bit annoyed.

"Uh, yeah actually how did you know?" Carol asked.

"Honey trust me I got two calls before you came in." Boyfriend said with some sass.

"Jeez calm down." Carol said as Boyfriend got dressed.

"Alright just lead him to the street around the McDonald's. Giving AMONGUS toys." Boyfriend said.

"Ritz Wake up, some guy needs his ass kicked." Boyfriend said.

"Alright just let me get my sunglasses and beanie." Ritz said tired.

The brothers arrived at the street where Girlfriend was conveniently there with Carol and Pico with his gang, and Sarv and Ruv.

"Alright who's the guy you want me to rap?" Boyfriend asked.

"Right here!" A voice said revealing himself to be the yellow folder guy said.

"The names Ron and I am your new nemesis, because I hate wemen and you don't!" Ron yelled.

"Wait what about when you said the N-word?" Boyfriend asked.

"Oh I have a pass." Ron said holding a pass.

"Oh ok."

"Yeah now let's rap you weird wemen liker!" Ron said.

"And when my full week called vs Ron comes out you'll be sorry!" Ron yelled as Girlfriend counted down.

"This is a certified, BRUH!" Ron yelled as the song began.

*After the most awesome song Ron*

"Hood classic!" Ron yelled finishing the song.

"Ok, I'll admit you had some cool singing and stuff, but I still hate wemen, and you know what I'ma watch some spe-" Ron said before getting penetrated by a spike coming from the ground.

"*Ack* I guess I'll die in a cool way now." Ron said before instantly dying.

After that a familiar face lookin like Dream came out of the ground and rose up to show himself.

His name was Bob.

"Bruh, what the hell man you lookin like you have ender pearl trades up." Boyfriend said as Pico loaded his gun.

"E N D O F D I A L O G!" Bob yelled it letter for letter.

*After Trouble*

Black goop from Bob started spreading around the street corrupting everything in it's path and everyone as well.

Boyfriend watched as it stopped when it came at him.

"Alright where the hell are you!" Boyfriend yelled.

"Alright you SICK FUCKING RAT!" Bob yelled out but no one was there.

Boyfriend saw all of his friends and Ruv covered in the black goo and watched as it bled out of them and leaking from their eyes and them puking out the goo.

"I first thought of you as a joke something for my own gain." Bob spoke through Ritz with their voices fused together.

"But instead you come around and FUCK it over!" Bob yelled through Sarv and again their voices fused together.

"But I'm not giving up that easily." Bob said through Girlfriend.

"New mechanics," He said as spikes rose from the ground.

"New layout," He continued as the ceiling dripped and screamed.

"New... E V E R Y T H I N G" Bob yelled revealing himself, completely black with white dots and an eternal smile.

"Eh, you still look like dream." Boyfriend said.

"Bitch!" Bob yelled before laughing like that flower from the funny skeleton game.

It echoed as everyone else laughed with him.

*After the hell that is onslaught*

Bob sighed as the goo returned.

"You win, I have nothing more to do, but heed my warning the opponents you'll face on this path will finish my job." Bob said as all the goo went off Boyfriend's friends, and Ruv.

"I hope you all can find it in your hearts to forgive... Deez nuts fuck all of y'all I'm going to burger king." Bob said before warping himself outta there.

Updike walked out at the entity's location a burger king.

He walked in and found him.

"Hello Bob." He said to the thing.

"So you're here to capture me, are you?" Bob asked him as Updike took a seat.

"Yes and I'll do whatever it takes." Updike said.

"Well then, I guess you'll di-"

"Wait!" Updike cut off Bob as a spike nearly pierced his throat.

"We have it, and my men have orders to shoot it and blow it up if you try anything." Updike informed Bob.

"Fine, you win, what do you wish to know?" Bob asked as two soldiers walked in afraid for their lives.

"Oh, we know everything Lennon Noah." Updike said.

"Who?"

"That's you."

"No it's not I'm Bob."

"Yes we know about you being a program."

"No I'm not I'm Bob."

"Wait so this info is..."

"Worthless yes."

"Alright I guess we'll run an interview."

"Your name?"

"Bob"

"Sex?"

"Bob" Bob giggled a bit.

Updike looked annoyed.

"Species?"

"Bob."

"Age!?"

"808 years old." Bob answered.

"Finally a normal... Damnit." Updike said.

"Take him away please." Updike said as the soldiers put on the shock collar and then loaded him in a safe.

Well that was annoying at least Tricky and Tord have gone after one of the people on the list.

They appeared to be going after Girlfriend and the Dearest family.

Step one will be complete.

Chapter Text

Tord and Tricky snuck into the Dearest household through one of the windows.

"Alright we're in." Tord said.

"We aren't with walkie talkies Tord we aren't communicating with those idiots." Tricky said.

"Oh"

"Anyway why are you in the greater good?" Tricky asked Tord.

"Eh, tried to take over the world with a giant robot I built with a friend."

"Damn so that's what got you." Tricky said looking at the red leader's arm.

"And you?" Tord asked Tricky.

"I used to be the most powerful being in Nevada, until someone took my improbability drive and those greater good pricks took me." Tricky said angred.

"Wow that must suck."

"It does."

Tord and Tricky climbed up into the attic and saw him, the kid who ruined their lives.

"Why that little-" Tricky whispered but stopped himself because he saw something, a random box.

Tord grabbed it and read some of the writing.

The Majin isn't to blame, it's you who lost the game.

Tord opened it slightly and looked at the kid and opened it at Boyfriend and then bolted and grabbed his clown friend.

Boyfriend was having a picnic with all of his pals who were all enjoying it.

"Aww, Boyfriend I love you so much." Girlfriend said.

"Boyfriend I accept you into my family with my daughter." Daddy Dearest said.

"Well in that case, Girlfriend will you marry me?" Boyfriend asked getting a ring from his pocket.

"Oh, my god yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes... Yes. Yes. Yeeeeeeees." Girlfriend said becoming distorted.

"Girlfriend?"

"Nope here's Sonic!" The bloody hedgehog that attacked him, Girlfriend, and Ritz in the video game.

"Wait how'd you get here?" Boyfriend asked.

"I don't know, I just saw this and I wanted to kill you." Sonic said awkwardly.

They both noticed how the forest was becoming purple and how the earth started rumbling.

"No not him!" Sonic yelled sounding helpless.

"Oh wow this is quite new!" An excited voice yelled as two deformed Sonics grabbed the one with blood coming from his eyes.

"Hey stop it!" The bloody hedgehog yelled before getting tossed around like a ball.

"What do we have here huh, a kid with moxie, a kid with determination, and a kid who must be very good at any games he may choose." A mysterious person that looked like sonic but with strangely human features said.

"Beep?"

"Oh, I'm no one but a friendly Majin looking for a fun time." The Majin said.

"Bop bee po."

"Why yes you are correct, in fact how about you and I have a fun time right here right now." Majin said.

"Bup boo."

"You can call me Sonic, Majin, CD whatever you prefer I'm willing to go with it, after all little buddy I have a bit of a secret." Majin said.

"Bap bop bip."

"I can make a deal, for just one challenge I'll give you something like a wish of some sorts, anything you desire." Majin said happily.

"Bipe ba beepee".

"Somewhat I suppose, however I have no limits, no rules, just anything you want." Majin said swinging his figer before stopping to give a bit of info.

"However if I find you cheating you loose no matter what." Majin said as the other deformed Sonics continued to juggle the non Majin lookalike.

"So what are you up for kid?" Majin asked.

"Beep"

"A rap song fight huh, well I can do that, what do I have to give back?"

"Bup bup boo"

"Ahhh, well I guess we shall now begin!" Majin yelled in excitement.

*During the part that absolutely slaps during Endless.*

Boyfriend saw as multiple people he knew started appearing with Majin's face, at first it was just something small but now everyone he knows was with a Majin face.

It was deeply unsettling.

But he carried on with the rapping.

As they continued rapping more and more of people Boyfriend faced came from the shadows all with the same face.

*After Endless*

"Well kid I outta thank you, you gave me the song of a lifetime!" Majin said as Sonic continued to be bounced by the others and the Majin versions of Boyfriend's friends faded from existence.

"Beep!"

"Well I guess I should get going, but don't worry I'll keep my end of the deal and you will see him again." Majin said.

"Wait!" Boyfriend yelled.

"Hmm, what do you want ol buddy ol pal?" Majin asked.

"Maybe you could stay here with me in my mind and we could hang out while I'm asleep." Boyfriend said.

"Y-you'd do that, why?" Majin asked putting the other sonic in a cage.

"Well you're friendly and a really cool guy and I'd love hanging out and having fun, just maybe without the deal things." Boyfriend said smiling at the demon who looked like he had tears coming for his sockets.

"It's a deal pal, and don't worry I'll find him and bring him back when you're awake!" Majin said happily giving Boyfriend a hug.

"Well I hope we'll be good friends."

"Oh, Don't worry we will, now you should probably be awa-"

Boyfriend jolted up feeling fuzzy hands on his shoulder, it was Ritz.

"Dude you ok, you were muttering in your sleep." Ritz said tired.

"Oh, yeah I guess I was just dreaming about one of my rap battles." Boyfriend said.

"Alright well it's breakfast time so we should get dressed." Ritz said putting on his beenie and also getting socks.

"Alright, see you in a sec bro." Boyfriend said giving his brother a noogie.

"Gah, jeez dude save that for when you and your girlfriend get things on alright." Ritz joked.

Boyfriend punched his brother in the arm jokingly.

Majin looked around to see a gold and purple creature without arms.

"So you make it, I've heard the legends, you are the most powerful being yes?" It asked.

"Well yes, but actually no, I'm sorry Marjin in where I wasn't invited by you, but I'm a friend of Boyfriend's, so he invited me here." Majin said.

"I thought you would know that, Mr. Starecrown." Majin said smugly.

"I only know how he is when he's awake, but I don't think that a demon should be under his protection." Starecrown said sounding somewhat angry.

"Hey dude I got you some ghost McDonald's." A teal ghost that looked like a stereotypical drug dealer said.

"Ah, you must be Garcello, I'm Majin and it's nice to meet you, Boyfriend has thought a lot about you being dead, but I am sure he's fixed that up." Majin told Garcello with glee.

"Yeah I come here from time to time, along with two other guys I visit." Garcello said.

"I'm guessing those two are Annie and Hex?" Majin asked.

"Uh, yeah I guess, how'd you know?" Garcello asked.

"Oh, I know everyone and everything, this and that, there's an infinite amount of universes, one where you live with a monster and some spooky kids, another where you're a cyborg, and one where you hook up with a succubus." Majin said chuckling a little bit.

"Huh, well want some fries?" Garcello asked.

Updike watched the footage of the two that entered the dearest residence opened a box holding two dangerous beings then leaving.

"You two just up and left after Releasing two demons." Updike gave a rhetorical question.

"Yeah and what are you going to do about it?" The clown sassed him.

Updike snapped making the gaurds grab Tabi, Agoti, and Zardy and drag them away from the cell and pressed a button to play some music,

"Sunshine lolipops and rainbows everything that's wonderful is what I feel when we're together!" The speakers played as Tord and Tricky yelled in agony while being shocked.

"Jesus Christ man, that's just cruel." Agoti said before getting shocked.

Updike pressed a button and the torture stopped.

"Do this again, and I will play the whole thing on loop for ten hours." Updike threatened.

He put all the anomalys back in their cell and walked away with his hands behind his back.

Knowing that after the other anomalys are continuing to be sick pathetic creatures like the dearest or Darnell disgusted him, however could he really kill the queen of hell if she turned over a new leaf, or even whitty if he hasn't been hurting anyone.

It was conflicting and trying to figure it out by emotion will just give you a headache, sometimes Updike wished there were more ways than execution, but we all can't get what we want can we now?

Chapter Text

boyfriend and girlfriend had finally settled on a date on a train for one thing love.

"Oh Boyfriend, isnt this lovely?" Girlfriend asked holding Boyfriend tight and in their new clothing.

Boyfriend was in a sweatshirt, shorts, and blue shoes while Girlfriend had put on stockings that went up to her knees and also black sleeves.

The two got on the train while looking at eachother loveingly and taking a seat on the train and getting some fancy feast, as they did that Boyfriend texted Ritz and put his phone away.

"Wow, you are a really caring brother." Girlfriend said curling her hair and texting carol about how to compliment him more.

"Yeah, I guess so, thanks bae." boyfriend said with a smile anda blush.

Girlfriend looked around and gave him a kiss on the lips and hugged him.

After just nearly suffocatting him Girlfriend noticed a sussy black figure climbing up to the train roof and left

Boyfriend noticed the sus black figure and decided to find out who the funk it was.

"Hey kiddo!" someone said next to him.

It was that Majin who Boyfriend had befriended a while ago, still looking like a charicture of Sonic the hedgehog.

"I just wanted to say hey and to let ya know that Ritz is safer than a box of money in a safe." Majin said patting Boyfriend on the head.

"Well thanks but someone might be trying to ruin our date." Boyfriend said.

"Wait, Our date?" Majin said in surprise.

"You know what I mean Majin." Boyfriend said glaring at his demonic friend.

"Hey Girlfriend want to check out that guy who climbed the train?" Boyfriend asked.

"Alright let'sa go BF!" Girlfriend yelled.

"Alright no one is here It's safe to unpack the mef." Whitty said sounding confused at the meth part mispronouncing it.

"Thanks Whit, I'll take care of this now, ya got it?" Darnell said taking off the suit.

"Beep?" someone beeped out at him.

"Oh, oh hey little B." he said to Boyfriend.

"Oh, Darnell it's just you.." Boyfriend said disappointed.

"Who'dya think it was?" Darnell asked confused.

"Someone else, say what's in the brief case?" Boyfriend asked looking at the meth filled brief case.

"Eh, drugs, say how's bout you and I do a battle, mono e mono." Darnell said snapping.

"Aww, funk yeah let's do that shit!" Boyfriend yelled pulling out his microphone.

"Well, let's get this show on the fiery fucking road." Darnell yelled.

-after Darnell-

"Heh, not bad lil B." Darnell said finger gunnin.

"Thanks bud." Boyfriend said giving a thumbs up.

Suddenly from every corner those robotic kids that Pico, Nene, and Darnell played R.P.S.R against.

"We've gotchya cornered pal!" on'e of those Uber kids yelled.

"Hey Larry take a look at this pretty boy!" another yelled putting a knife up to Boyfriend's throat.

Straight after he was held at knife point the Uberkid holding him there was stabbed in the eye by a thrown pipe.

"Hey little B, why don't we take care of these sum bitches?" Darnell said slashing the one near him's throat with a wooden blade.

After they dealt with the first two a giant kid had gotten up to Girlfriend and more came crawling from the train.

"Let's funkin' do this." boyfriend said grinning.

-after Pyro-

There were only two uberkids left.

"Heh, this is fucking better than the time I gave that druggie cigs to test em out." Darnell said.

Boyfriend then wondered if Darnell was talking about who he thought it was.

"Uh, what was his name?"

"Garsello or somethin' like that stupid fuck Big Bro's name." Darnell said holding the second to last kidbot.

"How do you that name?" Boyfriend asked starting to put the pieces of the puzzle and fit them all together.

"Eh, killed the fucker, wasn't bringin anythin to the shitty table people call the world, was just a waste of air." Darnell said.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Boyfriend yelled punching Darnell in the face so hard his nose bled and the brief case slid across the roof and opening itself to reveal crystal meth.

"alright, Moe we got the meth!" the second to last uber kid said to the giant one.

"Nice one shemp."

"Now alls we gotta do is- *urk*" the shemp one was hit by a low hanging light causing the meth to fall from the train's roof into the train itself.

"Shit." Darnell said knowing something no one else knew...

Half of that wasn't meth it was fulminate of Mercury.

The back of the train exploded in fiery blazes as Darnell kicked Boyfriend off of him.

"The fuck is wrong with you?" Darnell yelled in anger.

"YOU MOTHER FUCKER DON'T THINK I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT YOU DID!" Boyfriend yelled furiously.

"Wait was that hobo your friend, and that big bro twink was your actual brother, I should've guessed." Darnell said as the fire spread.

"god, y'know I wanted an easy trip to Albuquerque in New Mexico, but no I have to be held up by a bitchy blue little nig"

"Gah, god dammit go fish." Pico said flipping off Tankman.

"Ha, the captain wins again!" Tankman yelled in pride.

"Ruv did you have to invite your friends this time?" Sarv asked annoyed

"Sarv don't you have to scrap book with Steve and the kids to prey to that Jesus guy?" Tankman asked sassy.

"For your info they have been doing fine with Steve." Sarv said annoyed.

Pump then ran up to her, telling her that Steve tried to be spider-man again.

Pico got a call from Whitty as all this happened.

"Hey you guys have any whisky around, my flask is getting empty." Tom said checking the thing, usually Darnell brought that, while he, Ruv, Takman, and Tom brought the cards to decide the game.

The shit Whitty said made Pico say take the shit to the three and telling Sarv to call Hex to take the kids home.

Nene thankfully was in a chopper piloted by Whitty.

"How the hell do you know how to fucking drive this thing?" Pico asked his bomb headed companion.

"I have no clue."

-during boom-

Boyfriend and Darnell had actually been fighting for a while now to where Girlfriend noticed how Moe wasn't paying attention and instead watching... Spete.

"YOU FUCKING DARE WATCH SPETE RIGHT NEXT TO ME?" Girlfriend yelled in a demonic voice as Moe whimpered.

Girlfriend grabbed him by the ear and pinched harder than she ever could.

-after boom-

"You mother fucker first cigarettes then hitman whats next traffi-" Boyfriend was cut of by the enraged thing he couldn't call a human anymore.

"Don't fucking say it, you know the fact is I might be a dealer, I might kill for money, but I ain't that disgusting." Darnell said shooting Girlfriend off the train.

"beep!"

"Don't fucking compare me to that dumb bitch's father, or that psychopathic McDonald's loving grunt!" he said before getting Boyfriend at the edge of the cart, then grabbing him by the hoodie's collar.

"Oh look, the end of the line, alright I'm gonna finish the job I started a year ago." Darnell said before a red blur swooped in and made Boyfriend disappear.

"The hell?"

"bye bye" Girlfriend's cheeky voice said ad the train began t derail off a cliff.

"Shit shit shit Shit SHit SHIt SHIIIIIIIT!" Darnell yelled as he jumped from cart to cart of the burning train and reaching the cliffside nearly missing it but was grabbed by a hand... from nene.

"Oh, thank lord, you made it here juust in ti-" Darnell said as nene's arm was cut off by a train wheel.

Just as he fell however a black wire caught his arm and carried him to land.

Turns out it was Boyfriend who did that.

"Wow so even after I- *BAP*" Darnell was cut off By Boyfriend beating the everloving crap out of him.

"YOU. AREN'T. GOING. TO. FUCKING. DIE. UNTIL. MY. FUCKING SAY!" Boyfriend yelled as he paused inbetween each punch

Girlfriend rolled her eyes wishing that was her.

Boyfriend had basically beaten up someone who was said to be unbeatable which was honestly surprising.

"eat it." Boyfriend spat.

After kicking Darnell's ass Boyfriend and Girfriend went home through a portal when Girlfriend wanted to talk to BF.

"So about that." Girlfriend said.

"Big Bro was my, well, big brother, he was shot by a guy in a black cloak,right in front of me and Ritz, Ritz also got his leg shot from that, I remember it all clearly every detail from the date to the colour of shoes Ritz and I had on." Boyfriend said as tears dripped on the Dearest family household.

"Boyfriend I- I'm sorry, for the loss I mean, he desearved better." Girlfriend said comforting.

Majin watched as the dearest daughter comforted his little buddy who was crying over his brother.

He had to admit, this was sad, just depressing.

"Shh, don't worry I'm sure he still loves you in heaven." Girlfriend said to the crying buddy.

"Uh, anyone there, I've been in here for the last hour." Ritz said within the safe.

Boyfriend glared at the guilty majin.

After all that was delt with Majin made sure to apologize to Boyfriend and looked for his big brother, meanwhile Boyfriend had wished Ritz a good night.

"Sorry for keeping you waiting bud, so what was it, grunts, uber kids?" Pico asked his bloodied boss.

"Oh it was nothing but your bitchy Ex." Darnell said sounding furious.

"Now do your fucking job and get me the fuck outta here!" Darnell yelled as Whitty picked him up.

Pico wondered why someone like Boyfriend would attack Darnell, like yeah he's a dickhead but jeez that's a bit away from how BF does things.

Well he'll find out sooner or later, but for now he's got to get his boss into some hot water, litterally.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Ritz were once again gaming in Minecraft, but of course what's a good fun ass time without Daddy Dearest ruining it for everyone.

"Outta my way you little twerps!" The mad dad yelled kicking over the kids off the sofa.

The formidable father had the classic trashy football fan getup, popcorn, the drink helmet, and the number one hand.

"I don't think today is a football game." Ritz said clearly pissed.

"I know that but the news is featuring that nun lady crying right now and I want to see her sad and at tears!" The mad dad said maliciously.

He turned on the TV and sure enough there was Sarv crying and talking about a man climbing her tower and hurling vulgar insults.

"H-he said soo many mean things about meee!" She yelled on the TV sobbing as Daddy Dearest cheered in fanfare.

"Daddy what's the occasion?" Girlfriend asked.

"That nun lady is crying on the news and it's hysterical!" Daddy dearest yelled to his daughter laughing.

"Yeah but he also stopped us from playing minecraft!" Ritz yelled in anger.

Girlfriend clearly didn't care about what Ritz had to say cause the moment before jumping on the couch she kicked the rat bro across the face while doing it.

"Alright I guess my opinions don't matter." Ritz said rubbing his cheek.

"That's right you rodent, just get a job." Daddy Dearest said before a lightbulb appeared over his head.

"Sorry that happens sometimes." Terry said moving the bulb back in the light.

"Boyfriend, Ritz, you kids are getting jobs or else you two are outta here!" Double D yelled in excitement.

"Alright we will and get a lot of money Daddy... Dumbest!" Boyfriend yelled.

That's when the mad dad started crying.

And the crying became sobbing.

"TURRY DA BOYFEIND CALLED ME THE DUMBEST!" Daddy dearest yelled sobbing

"Ok so we're out of a house until we can get some big bucks." Ritz said looking at a newspaper filled with job lists.

"Lucky for us I got a bunch of job lists so we can decide on one." Ritz said with pride.

"First up the most easiest one for anyone." Ritz said knocking on a door.

The person that answered was the man who needs no introduction Ruv.

"Hello we would li-"

"Not interested" Ruv said slamming the door in the duo's faces.

"Well that flopped." Boyfriend said.

"Don't worry my bipedal bro, we'll find a job in no time." Ritz said in confidence.

99 job attempts later.

"Alright last one this might be our best bet, no skill required, nothin just us... washing windows." A bruised Ritz said.

"Alright so how much do know about cleaning windows?" A business man with a receding hairline, black suit, and blue tie asked.

"Well I'm pretty sure you dip the cleaning tool in the bucket and wipe the window with the tool." Ritz said as Boyfriend nodded.

"Correct you're both hired, now get to work!" He yelled handing the brothers suits and cleaning supplies.

"Well that was easy." Boyfriend said.

"You know it big brother." Ritz said punching Boyfriend's arm.

The two noticed marks on the windows and started cleaning them.

"Hey, Hey, HEY jackasses!" A mysterious voice yelled.

Boyfriend and Ritz looked up to see a middle aged man in wearing purple and climbing the tower.

"The hell are you doing?" The man asked.

"Our job for one."

"You're cleaning my smudges asshole"

"Well that's our job, don't like it leave." Ritz said trying to be a jackass

"Fuck you you off brand mickey mouse from new york." He said meanly.

"fuck you, you middle aged excuse of a human being."

"What's your name?"

"Ritz the rat!"

"That's pretty damn stupid!"

"Look who's talking mr suction cup man."

"Alright that's it, I'm gonna move to the left a bit and you two are going to try to get me off the tower!"

"Alright so what are we doing, fist fight, drinking contest, you gonna climb up over here with plungers and try to fight me?"

"Ha, no my big bro's gonna rap battle ya." Ritz said pointing at his brother.

"Holy shit is that a garden gnome?" The man yelled.

"Bop beep!" Boyfriend yelled throwing the mic, nearly knocking over the man.

"Heh, you're going to to suck harder than these suction cups." He said.

-after suction-

"Hey that was pretty good, even though I never rapped before." The suction cup man said.

"Yeah I guess so but still screw you." Ritz said.

"Yeah you too let's do another since I'm pretty fucking bored." He said.

-after climbing-

Boyfriend noticed something from the corner of his eye a spray bottle with purple liquid inside it labeled anti suction cup window cleaner.

"Beep!" Boyfriend beeped grabbing it and pointing it at the man.

"Oh, holy shit, keep that away from me!" The man yelled using a cup as a shield.

After threatening the man the brothers convinced him to move to another tower, the tallest one in philly.

"So let me get this straight instead of contacting the authorities, you rap battle him and get him to another tower?" The business dummy asked.

'Well yes but we stopped him from climbing the tower." Ritz said smiling awkwardly.

"Well we're fired." Ritz said holding about one hundred bucks.

"Oh hey, look at that!" Boyfriend yelled pointing at the dearest household.

"Curse youuuuu suction cuuuuuup maaaaaaan!" Daddy Dearest yelled shaking his fist at the aforementioned suction cup man.

"Yeah you too you purple freak!" Suction cup man yelled flipping Daddy dearest off.

"Heh, what a dumbass." The brothers said in unison, soon after going to Hex's place to play smash bros.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had fallen asleep on the couch cuddling each other after watching a romantic movie.

However daddy dearest had been watching them sleep together on the couch, even though they each had their own beds.

"I just don't get it Terry, what does my daughter see in that, small, pathetic, blue, white, child?" Daddy Dearest asked his number one henchman Terry.

"maybe she thinks he's cute after all what lady doesn't li- *ack*" Terry said before a knife entered his head as blood splattered onto the stairs.

"TE- *ack" The formidable father was cut off by a green zombie clown pinning him to the wall.

The father watched as a man with a robotic arm picked up his daughter and handcuffed her as a scarecrow went up to him and hit him with a hoe that nearly penetrated him knocking him out cold.

"If it weren't for this stupid collar I'd cut that stupid kid in half." Tabi said glaring at the kid that caused him this pain.

"Wait you know this kid?" Tord asked.

"Yes, I take it he cut your arm off or something." Tabi said.

"Haha, no, he got a guy called Tom to shoot a giant robot I built with a harpoon that caused it to explode." Tord responded.

"Wait raise your hand if you've seen this kid before." Zardy said as everyone's hands rose.

They all checked to see if the collar went off as they moved fast at Boyfriend.

Nothing happened, and so the beating began.

Boyfriend woke up feeling pain in most of his general areas and seeing blood all over himself and on the floor and sofa.

His vision was blurry and all he remembered was falling asleep to a cheesy chick flic next to Girlfriend who was nowhere to be seen.

As he saw the room a bit more he saw Terry's corpse torn open and a knocked out Daddy Dearest.

"Sir wake up!" Boyfriend yelled shaking the dad.

"wha- THE BOYFRIEND, WHERES MAH DAUGHTER!" The mad dad yelled furiously.

"I don't know!" Boyfriend yelled.

The two enemies soon went upstairs to find that Ritz and the mean mother were bound and gagged in their respective rooms.

"This is the worst room service ever!" Girlfriend yelled as Tord gripped the steering wheel tighter.

"What do you want now?" Tricky yelled furiously.

"I want some Taco bell." she said scoffing.

"We just got Taco bell!" Tord yelled in anger.

"Well I want more."

"No, we are not wasting more money on food and gas." Tabi said stoically.

"What is this bell of tacos?" Zardy asked.

"CAN WE ALL STOP TALKING ABOUT TACO BELL FOR TEN MINIUTES!" Tricky yelled in pure anger.

The van soon fell quiet for ten seconds and all was most likely looking up.

"What about Wendy's?" Girlfriend said breaking the silence.

"FUUUUUUUUCK" Everyone but Zardy yelled, Tricky banged his head on the window, while Tord hit his on the car horn.

Boyfriend had gathered most of the people he knew into Pico's bar from Annie to Whitty to find Girlfriend.

"So does anyone have any ideas to find her?" Carol asked looking at the map of Philadelphia.

"No, Dearest, Mearest, and Rat boy are still being interviewed by Skid and Steve." Pico said pointing at a room.

"My deepest apologies Boyfriend I can assure you I'll try all I can to find your beloved" ENA said somberly.

"God, Pico do you have any beers, the shit I'm sitting through right now is harder than my lost hardon." Tankman said tired.

"*augh * Johnathan Captain Tankman, is that really an appropriate thing to talk about, in front of children no less!" Sarvente yelled pointing at Pump and Pompom.

"Calm your cristian sugar titties nunzila, this is a meeting to find a butter face other than yours." Tankman responded.

"Please everyone calm down I'm sure someone could have an answer to this predicament." Hex said trying to calm everyone down.

Seconds after Hex said that the S boys came out with eight different drawings four from skid and another pack from Steve.

Skid's were crudely drawn with basic shapes while Steve actually had talent.

The drawings were A green nevadian clown that Boyfriend, Pico, and Sarv recognized as Tricky, a man with a robotic arm and a red hoodie who was Tord, another was a goat skull abomination to nature that was defiantly Tabi no doubt about it, the final one was a scarecrow in Purpleish black with a hoe.

"Hey I saw these guys, all of them." Boyfriend said pointing at all of them.

"Wait did they want revenge?" Pico asked.

"No remember the collars" Ruv said.

"Then what do they all have in common?" Hex asked getting flashbacks to the fancy Taco bell

"Well for one they have all tried to kill me." Boyfriend said.

"And that's a surprise how?" Ruv asked sarcastically pointing at the small man.

"They're all dangerous." Carol said.

"Well duh, of course they are puffball" Pico said annoyed.

"Wait Carol has a point you guys." Whitty said surprised.

Girlfriend woke up hand cuffed and in a dark room on a chair.

"Welcome Girlfriend." a mysterious voice said.

The lights turned on to show a cloud man and a yellow creature holding a pendulum in chains.

"Begin termination attempt number zero zero one" the cloud man said as the creature went up to Girlfriend.

It swayed it's pendulum back and forth at Girlfriend singing a tune about how Girlfriend leaving everyone she knew behind.

"What do I get?" Girlfriend asked bluntly.

The creature seemed confused by the babble until trying harder using more of it's energy to focus on hypnotizing the little child.

yet still to no avail, it hadn't had a meal in so long after the last one perished of old age.

This time He focused his energY to Prepare to get the diviNe meal Of her dreams.

His body became limp leaving only his head to erratically move and his his mouth opened in anticipation as he levitated the pendulum to the girl

She seemingly slowly fell for his trance as her eyes started to swirl.

Then she instantly woke up as the creature died using the last of it's strength to let out a screech.

"Ha, stupid cloud dickhead." Tricky laughed.

"I just don't get it how did they meet?" The Monstrous mother asked.

"Updike" Whitty mumbled.

"What?" Everyone asked.

"Updike, the leader of the greater good an origination dedicated to capturing and killing anomies around the globe, like me." Whitty said looking down.

"But your totally cool man, what could be bad about you?" Boyfriend asked confused.

"Really bro" Darnell said pointing at Whitty's head.

"He can say the N-word." Boyfriend said.

Darnell face palmed.

"no dumbass who's brain is smaller than Tankman's penis size." Ruv said.

"He's literally a walking talking bomb." Pico said giggling a bit.

"oh yeah, well we need to find Girlfriend and stop these guys, so who's with me?" Boyfriend asked as only Ritz and the Dearest dad cheered.

"Anyone besides my brother and my girlfriends father who I hate, really no one?" Boyfriend asked disappointed.

suddenly Ruv got up and looked at the blue boy.

"Well if I'm reading the signals then they'll probably want to take on Sarv next, and despite you being the bane of my existence I'll help you." Ruv said begrudgingly.

"Yeah, let's kick that Updike guy's butt." skid and pump said happily.

"If these guys are comin count me and Steve in." Tankman said.

pretty soon everyone began talking about how they have to stop any more of these kidnappings.

the door opened showing a silhouetted figure walking in.

"Holy shit, who the hell is that?" Daddy dearest asked as the silhouette dropped a McDonald's paper bag on the floor.

"The most feared criminal in all of Nevada... Hank" Boyfriend said in suspense.

"hello" Hank said innocently.

"He looks like a small pathetic drug dealer." Ruv said.

"YA mogu ubit' tebya bez vsyakikh usiliy, ty nichto po sravneniyu so mnoy, ty zhalkoye opravdaniye dlya muzhciny." Hank said as Ruv stepped back looking mortified even with his regular face.

"My goodness" Hex and Sarv said in unison.

"oh, mes excuses." Hank said bowing.

"so kid I heard from a little blue bird that you have a clown problem." Hank said pointing at an actually blue bird chirping.

"Yeah, he kidnapped my GF , could you help me with that?" Boyfriend asked as Hank looked down.

"oh, the McDonald's wetter." Hank said as Pico burst out laughing.

"You can beat the shit outta the clown."

"OH FUCK YEAH, COUNT ME THE FUCK IN!" Hank yelled summoning Sanford and Deimos.

"How the hell-"

"GET THE FUCKING CAR RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!" Hank yelled at the two.

"Okay here's the pan, Sanford drives me and Hank to the base secretly as you guys get vehicles and start destroying the place while I come out with GF and Hank with Tricky's head." Boyfriend explained.

"Then I save the day" Double D said having a poorly drawn cutout of himself.

"Terry, Carlos keep my husband in the car." Mommy Mearest said snapping.

"Yes ma'am"

"alright so everyone get your vehicles" Boyfriend said.

"And let's do this shiz."

"Do you have any... Threes, no way you have those" A.G.O.T.I said at Tricky.

Tricky scarfed down the cards and chewed them up.

"Why the fuck would you do that?"

"I was hungry for paper." Tricky said still chewing the cards.

A.G.O.T.I started screaming childishly.

"Damn it Agoti you always act like this." Tabi groaned.

"Well excuse me goatboy I had most of my portable games taken and destroyed by this knockoff SCP foundation."

"What is an SCP." Zardy asked.

"we have much to discuss." Agoti saod.

"Will you all just be quiet, I'm trying to brood here." Tord said watching as a helpless Girlfriend was dragged by the hand cuffs.

Heh, classic stupid kids maybe Boyfriend will be lured in this hell hole and get killed by updick.

"Well I'm done, what now?" Tord said.

everyone just shrugged.

Boyfriend and Hank had arrived at the facility.

"Alright Sanford you wait for everyone else, I'll find and kill that clown, and you... you find your McDonald's wetting Girlfriend, you're cool though." Hank said.

"Alright lets do this." Boyfriend said.

"Ja mata aimasho" Hank said patting Boyfriend on the shoulder.

"Anata mo okoto." Boyfriend responded.

Boyfriend searched for his beloved within the facility of grey sneaking in any way he could away from any guards.

He'd actually made it to a room with a yellow creature's corpse lying there, then suddenly the door opened with two cleanup crew members.

"UH, gee Paul do'ya ever wonder what life would be like if we applied for doctors." The one on the right said.

"Shut up Ringo, besides we's don't got no medicine licensing all we have is cleaning supplies and the knowledge how to." Paul said.

"Eh, fair is fair I guess."

"Hey who-" Paul was shot.

"Paul n-" Ringo was then also shot.

"Leg dich nicht mit gott an." Hank said in German.

Boyfriend took this as a signal to keep moving and find Girlfriend he went up to one of the men and took a key card labeled Paul Starr, could come in handy.

he continued down the hallway to see a door labeled keep shut.

What could go wrong? He thought.

he continued walking into the room expecting to see Cthulhu or something but it was just a mask, or rather a fragment of one.

"The hell is this thin?" Boyfriend said tapping it.

"HELLO" it responded loudly.

Boyfriend jumped back in surprise.

"VERY happy to see you Bee Eff." It said.

"Happy to talk to any living creature." It continued.

"Anyways I need you to break me from this grey ol' hell hole." It said.

Boyfriend did some thinking and came to a conclusion.

"Alright, But if I do this you do something for me."

"Why of course, why wouldn't I?"

Boyfriend felt a light tap on his shoulder

It was the goofy majin that wandered BF's mind.

"Kid I don't think you should take this guy's deal." Majin said concerned even with the smile

"C'mon dude it's the fastest way to get to GF" Boyfriend said to his mind pal.

"*sigh* Fine but just this once" Majin said disappointed as BF Picked up the mask and it gave directions on where to go.

Hank had finally made it into the cell room finding Tricky by his scent, after all zombies smell awful.

"Hank. Motherfucker. Wimblton." An old enemy said, none other than the Mag agent Torture.

"Wow you came just in time, I was getting bored of easy targets." Hank said snarky .

"Well then prepare to die." Torture said as a bunch of G.G agents came from behind him.

"You forgot one thing Torture." Hank said reaching in his coat.

"What's that little man?"

"Usted ne pas chaos to Bog" Hank said in a bunch of different languages.

Hank soon started blasting at everyone even dodging bullets from torture.

Boyfriend saw Girlfriend in the middle of a hallway room after making it from the mask's chamber.

"Bee!" Girlfriend said in joy.

"Beeeeep!" Boyfriend said hugging and kissing Girlfriend.

Until he noticed she was handcuffed.

"Don't take another step Boyfriend." The guy presumed to be Updike said.

Boyfriend turned around seeing a cloud man with Tord and Tabi behind him.

"See, what did I tell you?" Tord said as Tabi handed him a twenty.

"Enough, I know your games Boyfriend, and I will gladly play to an extent, and I will happily take the bet or deal or whatever you wish for it to be called." Updike said putting away his revolver and grabbing a microphone.

"Beep, Boop" Boyfriend said angered.

"Alright then let us begin."

*during remorse*

Pico had been in the front with a car from darnell waiting for everyone else.

"Hey carrot cock!" Tankman yelled in his tank as Darnell and Nene in a helicopter flew over.

"So are we ready?" Ruv asked in a motorcycle with Sarv in the side car.

"not yet dude." Pico said.

"Heh, Y'know you can't really have an attack without artillery." Deimos said as Sanford drove in an armored vehicle with a mounted minigun.

"wiener wiener wiener wiener wiener wiener wiener" Edd repeated in a literal wiener mobile.

"Hey guys we're here." Carol said in a golf cart with Whitty also inside.

Finally Mommy Mearest drove into the crowd in a limousine with Ritz, Annie, her henchmen, and her husband.

"Hex didn't wish to fight and skid couldn't come because his mom didn't let him." Ritz said.

"fine by me." Pico said.

"So are we ready!" Pico yelled as everyone yelled in unison.

They continued yelling until they knew they were ready.

After that they charged at the base with Pico leading the technical army.

Hank had killed most of the agents besides torture who grabbed him and started beating Hank down.

meanwhile Boyfriend had finished the rapping with the boss man.

"Well you certainly put up quite the fight, but I'm afraid I'll have to retract from the deal and have them end you." Updike said as Tord and Tabi smiled.

"This I'll enjoy" Tord said grabbing the kid by the collar and holding him up as Tabi pulled a knife to BF's throat.

That was until the wall blew up showing friends to the fullest, except for Darnell, and Ruv.

Then chaos ensued as multiple entitys ranging from weak ass shit to fucking godlike joined the fray.

Hank had been getting thrown around for a little bit was held by torture and was getting crushed by the giant fingers of his.

"Hey giant boy!" Sanford yelled.

Torture looked behind himself seeing the hook grunt on a giant blue monster with a black shirt and red pants.

the monster grabbed him and beat the mag agent half to death while Hank managed the other.

"Gracias." Hank said giving the thumbs up to the monster who was Annie.

"Hey no problem Hank." Sanford said.

"Yeah it was nothing." Annie said taking the praise well.

Pico and Nene were on the tank killing any agents in their way as Steve was regularly firing.

Tankman meanwhile was blasting his gun harder than a dick on December.

Ritz had picked up his brother and his brother's lover while rolling on a wheel of cheese then jumping on the golf cart Carol was driving.

"Thanks lil' bro." BF said having the mask in his pocket.

suddenly the guy on the internet jumped in the backseat unknown to everyone else.

Updike had gone to a helicopter nearly getting harpooned with Tord and Tabi in tow.

"Sir the clown, the scarecrow, and Bob have been successfully transferred to another base." An agent said n the communicator.

"Good I have Tord and Tabi with me right now." Updike said as he escaped the crumbling base.

"meet you in the upper north sir." the agent said.

After the base crumbled and everyone miraculously survived Agoti introduced himself to the group and what do you know Boyfriend has another friend.

afterwards everyone had set aside their differences and planned a celebration for the destruction of the organization a cruise with whine to adorable TV.

Hopefully nothing will go wrong

Chapter Text

daddy Dearest had been piloting this ship carrying everyone Boyfriend knew from demonic entities all the way to fucking sassy animals.

"ahoy sir, why thee hell do we be at sea?" Terry asked in a pirate accent and yet still sounding dead within the inside.

"well you see Terry, it's my newest scheme, I will drown that blue pest and his annoying pest of a brother." daddy dearest said clenching his fist.

"and besides after the whole Greater Good incident my daughter and wife have been seven feet up my ass, so I got the two people on this Satan forsaken boat that hate those two as much as I do."

Suddenly three guys walked in turning out to be Edd's gang.

"Hey are you the captain?" Edd asked.

"Evil captain." Doulble D said.

"I'm sorry what?" Matt said.

"Ehrm nothing, if you want more wine It's next to my drunken wife." he said coughing a bit.

"Not drunk *ack* just seasick!" double M yelled out before throwing up

the three dudes just left afterwards.

"anyway back to the criminals" Double D said.

"aye and who do they be?" Terry asked.

"the most feared- well second AND third most feared criminals in the entire world."

Sarv had been getting a massage from one of the many henchmen.

"Ruv I- ah- feel great." Sarv said in enjoyment.

"That's great tell me when your at the sauna so I can ki- I mean hang out with Boyfriend and the other guys." Ruv said as the massager finished on her... with the massage, weirdo.

"Alright then, see you after my most relaxing hour in my immortal life." She said.

"Alright see you." Ruv said shoving the massager away.

Sarv had gone into the sauna seeing Carol and Pico Talking about how cool a guy Whitty is.

"oh hey Sarv." Pico said as Sarv took a seat

"Salutations" She greeted the two.

The three started talking about the other people on the boat.

"And then I said patella I barley know her!" Darnell said to Edd, Tom and Tankman.

"Ha, Pretty good bruh." Tankman said taking a swig.

"Heh thanks, anyway I gotta go y'know ki- I mean get to Ritz and GF." Darnell said inconspicuously.

Darnell got up and left to get to the suites and into the room where the man that degraded him and made him lose money for his meth trade.

He saw the rat washing himself in the bathroom and grabbed the chloroform and you can guess what happened to him next.

after that he noticed that GF had walked in and again you can guess.

Girlfriend woke up feeling quite naughty, it didn't help that she was tied to Ritz and that in itself would turn her on.

"Well they're done for once we take em down under." Darnell said to a tall... Russian figure.

"welp, allow me." Ruv said pushing the cinderblock with his foot.

"Wait wait waIt!" Ritz yelled actually stopping Ruv.

"What is it?" Ruv asked.

"Don't you want to know if we have any last wo- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH" Ritz yelled as Ruv pushed the two off the ship.

"Well that's done with now time for that blue, annoying, child." Ruv said.

"You bet unless he kills himself somehow." Darnell laughed.

"Not too surprising to be honest." Ruv said as he saw a falling boy with blue hair fall by.

"And our job is done." Darnell said as Ruv actually smirked in pain and instantly returned to his regular blank poker face .

Boyfriend had taken a dive after one of the henchmen dared him to dive off the board and do some swagilishous tricks.

But he bounced a tad bit too far and fell underwater.

as he sunk he saw majin but with a new look a little bit.

"Hey uh, Majin could you uh,-"

"Oh, don't worry about it kiddo, look down."

Boyfriend did what the majin said and took a look down and saw a scuba suit conveniently hanging in a way he could grab it and land in the water safely.

once he landed in the water he saw a cinder block with cut rope on it.

"Hey dude." He heard Ritz say underwater.

"Ritz!"

"Boyfriend, I'm sorry but I Must evolve into fish." Girlfriend said as she started to swim before getting eaten whole by a large fish.

That was short lived though since she cut the fish open and hugged BF.

"Nevermind."

"Well we should probably find a way to land." Ritz said but before they could do anything the three heard two voices in the seaweed.

"OK Patrick, first get a jar." A square sea sponge with pants said to a pink star with nothing but shorts on.

the star responded by grabbing a microphone.

"Patrick that's a microphone." the sponge said.

"Yes." The star named Patrick responded

"Uhh, Pat you should get a jar instead of a microphone."

"Jar, mic they're the same thing, after all both are an instrument." Patrick said confidently.

"Like mayonnaise, right Spongebob?" Patrick said confidently.

"Hey I recognize those guys." Ritz whispered.

"From what?" GF asked thinking about how good of an instrument mayo tastes.

"There's this documentary on BBC about how life has evolved in the irradiated Bikini Atoll, and apparently it became less wasteland more an actual city made of ocean trash." Ritz explained.

"WOW!" Girlfriend yelled as Boyfriend disappeared from the group.

"Bep"

"OH, hello there, what brings you here?" Spongebob asked.

"Ba boo bep beep po."

"Patrick, I think this kid wants to battle you!" Spongebob said to Patrick.

"Alright I'll do it with this jar." Patrick said holding a Microphone.

"Alright I'll grab some krabby patties, by the way who are those guys?" Spongebob said as GF and Ritz walked out from the sea grass.

"Kareshi, How would mother feel about this." Ritz yelled.

"Calm down Ritz he's just curious." Girlfriend said.

"Don't worry I'll get more for us to share, Bahlalala." Spongebob laughed.

"Thanks" GF said as she summoned her speakers."

Then Patrick started singing then on Boyfriend's turn he asked if Mayonnaise was an instrument making the other two laugh.

*after mayonnaise*

"Spongebob Patrick!" A blue octopus yelled.

"Oh, hi squidward, You want a krabby patty?" Songebob asked giving one to Girlfriend.

"Oh Puh-lease I'd rather eat that excuse you call a home." Squidward said before closing the window.

"Well I guess it's my turn, I'll do my best, one question though?" Spongebob asked.

"ba"

"Are ya ready guys!" Spongebob yelled before popping off.

*After F.U.N*

"ALRIGHT I'VE HAD ENOUGH, SPONGEBOB PATRICK SHUT UP WITH THAT TARTER SAUCE!" Squidward yelled.

"What do you mean squid, were just having fun." Spongebob said.

"AT MY EXPENSE!" Squidward yelled.

"Now where does that earpeircing noise come from?" Sqidward asked.

"Wait we still need to do one last song!" Ritz yelled.

"Oh Puh-lease I can make more than these barnacle heads can even count." Squidward said chuckling a bit after saying that.

"Well then you can certainly make another song for us to sing." Ritz said.

"Well if I could show these barnicleheads how music is done then fine I'll do a "rap batte" for you to leave!" he said angered.

"Alright that'll do." Ritz said smiling.

*after E-minor*

"Ok we'll leave now" GF said sprouting wings and going to the boat in the sea creature's amazements.

"Alright boys here's your payment." The mad dad said handing bags of money to the two criminals.

Although that was when GF flew from the water with the two other boys.

"Never mind- wait a minute..." Daddy dearest said as he took the bags.

"Why was my daughter underwater?" He asked as the criminals sweated bullets.

Chapter Text

Pico had been taking BF's group to talk to Darnell due to the incident, I mean he's a dick but still Pico didn't want to be guilty by association.

"Look bro, I don't know what he did but you but I don't want you to hate me and Whitty, Nene you can hate her all you want along with Darnell but still." Pico said as they all entered the bar.

"Hey dude I Brought them!" Pico yelled in the dark.

he saw that the lights were all turned off and turned them on only to back off and throw up.

"Jesus christ." Pico said throwing up.

BF decided to take a look inside to see Darnell, Nene, and Pump all being held by massive throbbing tenticles as the aformentioned were lifeless.

"BEEP!" he yelled.

He noticed the tenticles were coming from the computer screen as it said ready for round two.

Boyfriend somewhat knew that this was sounding a bit sussy but grabbed Girlfriend knowing she was a demon and told Ritz and Pico to stay outside.

The lovers jumped into the computer and were inside.

after walking within a black forest an old bloody hedgehog had gone after them.

Once he struck GF was prepared to use a demonic sheild.

"Ha, silly hedgehog this sheild is more than anything you've done in your entire life." GF said.

the creature growled in discust but then smiled growing a bit making himself lankier.

then out of nowhere guitar noises started coming from nowhere.

*during Y O U C A N T R U N"

the hedgehog had transported everyone into green hills and making everyone pixilated.

however this tactic obviously didn't work since once he noticed it he started getting mad.

"WHY YOU LITTLE!" It screamed before continuing the song

*after Y O U C A N T R U N*

That was it, the hedgehog thought grabbing the red dressed girl and yeeting her away to the real world he'll soon destroy just for the kicks, however he'd have to gain some help so he snapped and summoned a minion of his, one of that poor egotistical hedgehog's friends tails.

Girlfriend felt pain as she was thrown out of the computer and saw how the souls were getting tourtured in a form of stasis unknown to most demons but stasis was easy to break for any.

She proceeded to cut the throbbing vainy tenticles that not even she would enjoy.

"Pico, Ritz get in here!" GF yelled to the two boys outside

"Ugh, the hell happened?" Darnell asked as Pump got up.

Nene just lied there.

"BF was trying to save you all." GF said as Whitty checked to see if it was safe.

BF had been rapping against the blood eyed grey fox with one arm for a little bit while colecting rings before tails swung himself at BF knocking him to face Sonic who had multiple eyes and along with purple spikes at the tips entire rows of razor sharp teeth and a large X on his midsection.

The two kept the rappin up befor BF found himself... on the right side of the feild seeing an echinda with a melted face and also one arm with a shade of grey who he rapped until BF was punched again facing the demonic sonic.

This also went for a few turns before BF was transported into the right place fighting against an Eggman without legs held up by a rusty hook and he was laughing as they sung.

GF had been talking with everyone as pump looked at the computer in amazement.

he saw that BF was rapping against an egg shaped monster.

he pressed the esc key and looked around darnell's desktop he saw multipe folders they were called work, blueprints, and memes.

of course memes would make everyone happy so he started dragging the .exe file into the folder.

Boyfriend had been going up against the demon that was'nt at all sexy and was still trying to kill him.

then the song finished after eight minutes.

"I WILL END YOU!" sonic yelled before the ground rumbled and the world was destroyed around them.

"WHAT" It yelled out as he and Boyfriend fell into a blue word with two speakers and a dancing demon.

"Hello Fwiends, I'm Sunky the uh, sunky the dancer I guess."

"What, where am I, why do I feel... powerless." Sonic said in fear.

"c'mon don't be sad, just be a patient pickle." Sunky said.

"Bu-"

"BE A COMPLIENT CUCUMBER!" Sunky yelled cutting off Sonic.

suddenly Majin appeared next to BF looking like his old self again (I don't like his redesighn)

"Hey kid what's troublin ya?"

"Well nothing much could've used your help about ten minutes ago." BF said.

"Hey let's sing." Sunky said.

BF thought about it and even though he rap battled four eldritch horrors a small little rap for fun couldn't hurt

"Fwiends come" the dancer said. Then Tlels, Nickles, Robotnick (more like Robuttnick am I right up top), Aem Ross, Crem, and Silly all came to level fun and started partying.

*Milk begins*

"Milk and cereal- Milk and crereal- Milk and cereal- cereal and milk"

"This is a certified hood classic"

"Well hello my freind let us do the dance now"

bf reapets in Beep

"Ok I understand want some breakfast instead"

bf reapets in Beep

"Wanna go on an adventer i'm running out of ideas here."

bf reapets in Beep

"Oh you want to rap battle but i'm not very gud at dat doe"

bf reapets in Beep

"We're supposed to be danceing tho when we're stoping noone knows high kicks high kicks this is how we do it"

bf reapets in Beep

"Gotta go fest aw yeah this happening insert an outdated sonic meem ocassonly sunking cause my names sunky makes wanna go balalalalal"

bf reapets in Beep

S:"Can I put the cereal in your jaw" B:"Your jaw" S:"Cereal in your jaw. Oh can I" B: "Can I" S:"Oh can I" B:"Can I"

B:"Can I put my balls in yo jaw" S: "Wait what" B: "Balls in yo jaw. Oh can I" S: "Bro thats gross" B: "Oh can I" S: "But why though"

S: "It's the best day ever" B: "Friends forever. It's the best day ever" S: "Dance forever."

S: "It's the best day ever" B: "Friends forever. It's the best day ever" S: "Danceing with my brand new bestest friend."

"Wait a sec now I get you don't know how to do the dance party well it's actully real easy simple as 1 2 3 first you need the fashun then you need teh dance moves and thats all you really need to be danceing like sunky"

bf reapets in Beep

"Now I know- Now I know your bored of level fun"

bf reapets in Beep

"Take you to- take you to level the green one"

bf reapets in Beep

"Now I know I've only known you for about a couple of minutes but I must say your a blast your a blast when we're going fast your a blast you are now on blast blast -st -st -st"

bf reapets in Beep

"You know your not my usesul kid you know"

bf reapets in Beep

"Wanna have a dance time then lets'a go. But before that you have to know"

"I see your pal over there he looks fun so let me give you some advice just let everthing around transpire as you dance with your deepest dark desires"

bf reapets in Beep as majin says "Eh what the hell" and does the disco while exe continues to hate life.

"Milk and cereal in a bowl. Milk and cereal in a hole. Milk and cereal is my soul. Cereal and milk"

"It matters not how blue all that matters is the size of your shoes."

Sonic started crying Aloud as Tlels told him to fiddle the riddle.

*Milk is done*

"Well done Friend!" Sunky yelled as Sonic tried attacking nickels

"Wah, a ghost!"Nikels said before spinning his tounge.

"I'm no ghost you red bufoon." Sonic said angered.

"Ah ah ah, you aren't being complient or a cucumber." Sunky said wrapping up the demonic hedgehog.

"So do you want to keep dancing or what?" Sunky asked.

"But I have A Girlfriend." BF answered.

"But dancing and big shoes are the key for everyone's happiness." Sunky said sad.

"Well I don't think I can dance away the deaths Iv'e watched and my big shoes ain't helping either." Boyfriend said as Sunky started to have an epiphiny.

Boyfriend started walking out with Majin but when they almost came out they heard a voice."

"Wait!" Sunky yelled as the two gave him their full attention.

"Little bluberry with a smiling face I just have to say you taught me something today, that the key to my happiness isn't the key to everyone's happiness, now this is a bit hard to explain but I'll try my best, you see I was a young blue dancer I always asked myself am I blue enough do I have enough spines, and then came the day where robotnick, (more like Robuttnick amIrite) atemted his machinery takeover and since noone else cared I decided to stop him, I went from my home level the green one to level OMG is that a factory, until I found the emerdoods that made me become sOuPeR SuNkY, and I saved the day, but with this power I realized I wasn't blue I became yellow and my spines changed,so then I asked myself If the emerdoods changed my spines and colour what didn't they change? then I found out... it was my shoes, and with that I found my true happiness and with this new found knolage I decided that my new found goal in life was to bring others happiness, and so tlels fiddled the riddles, I got Robuttnick to seem cool and finally he was liked, I fixed Aem's sanity and made find things that made her happy besides me, I got rid of that creture terrorizing crem, And silly heh heh, let's just say someone really cares about her, and nikels... after all this time I've tried to conviced him that ghost aren't real but he won't listen. after I helped everyone we just danced and ate cereal cause it was good. just freinds hanging out, and I guess that's why I forced you to dance, but now I never considered what You helped me realized today, so as a token of my appreciation... my albem the slunky sounds of sunky has been gifted to you." Sunky monolouged handing BF an album with sunky doing a slunky pose.

"Wow sunky I don't know what to say besides I Guess we're friends." BF said tearing up a bit..

Majin actually cried a bit as the two waved a temporary goodbye to their newest friend.

and so todays adventure had ended but there are more fridays to come and more adventures and friendships to be made.

Chapter Text

Terry had gone to the temple of greats to find the legendary item... the scooby snack the item that can summon an extremely powerful being.

he picked it up and chanted the ancient incantation to summon the deity.

"Like, what's the big idea man?" The great one asked.

"Oh, mighty great one, I Terry of the Dearest residence have called upon you to go up against a formidable opponent." Terry said.

"Like how formidable man?" The ultimate one asked.

Terry took the memory orb and showed the multiple battles from all the opponents from the last twenty one and a half weeks from Majin to even Bob.

"Like I- I never thought a shitty universe like this could have such powerful beings capable of destroying and conquering entire universes ." The mighty one said.

"So do we have a deal?"

"Like I don't know man if he can own the queen of demons, one of the most powerful beings within the multiverse, and the theoretically most powerful being in the universe."

"what if I added in a scooby snack?" Terry asked holding the artifacts.

the god among us(hah sus) had grabbed them and nodded.

"Ma'am, yes we got him." Terry told his boss.

Matt had been meditating when he felt disrupted by something powerful was it really him is he here today.

he pat his pet duck on the head.

"Duck we need to see if the prophecy- wait what am I talking about that was fulfilled centuries ago." Matt laughed remembering the stories his great grand father told him about that damned mask and how the four pieces were scattered across the world.

"Heh, what am I saying, we need to see if he's here." Matt said picking up duck who quacked in response.

He went to the resort that was closed and went to the sword fighting stadium that was the true definitive one and waited.

BF, GF, Ritz, and Majin had all gone to the house on the hill to modernize it, y'know give it electricity and mechanics.

unfortunately all but Majin didn't know anything about engineering.

luckily Majin helped the trio with the wiring.

"Hey thanks for the help man." BF said as Ritz went upstairs.

"eh, No problemo kiddo, anyway I gotta go check on Gar." Majin said.

after Majin left the front door opened to reveal a man with a green shirt and brown pants with a shaggy beard.

"Like, hey you guys, have you seen a dog around here?" The man asked.

"Beep bop bep di skap"

"Yeah I'm looking for a dog that got lost in this mansion." The man said

"Sure but what's your name?" GF asked

"like, the names shaggy." Shaggy said smiling.

"Beep di bi" boyfriend beeped pointing at his mic.

"Like you want to sing man, alright a few shouldn't hurt." Shaggy said giving thumbs up and giving Girlfriend the signal.

*During Where are you*

Girlfriend called her mother on her earpiece cleverly hidden by her hair.

"GF what has happened so far." Mommy Mearest asked.

"Well Shaggy is here for one." GF said.

"and he is now using a bit of power." GF said as shaggy did the hard part of where are you while sparking a yellow flash causing a small vibration.

Matt had sensed a small vibration that he felt came from somewhere not in Nevada but in Philadelphia that must've been Shaggy using zero to point one percent of power.

So it's most likely classic, not too big of a surprise but still.

BF had wondered about the mysterious burst of energy and asked about it in beeps.

"like sorry man, guess I lost control of my ZOINK energy for a sec, sorry man, didn't mean to make it like unfair to you." Shaggy apologized.

"BEp pee poop."

"Like alright man, let's like do this." Shaggy said tapping his foot causing slight vibrations.

*During Eruption*

"Like that's the first wind I ever heard with a sense of humor." Shaggy said chuckling

BF repeated the phrase in his usual beeps.

Ritz had found something within the attic.

"Hello?"

"Ruhhh, rou don't ree me rat." A voice said as a brown tail grew from the boxes.

"Hey uhh, Majin I need some help." Ritz said holding some wires.

"Oh, don't worry it's just a dog."

"Rog, rere!" The dog said jumping into Majin's arms.

"I knew it!" Majin yelled.

"Knew what?" Ritz asked.

"This wasn't a wiring thing, it was a ploy to kill you and Boyfriend." Majin said.

"rat rasn't re ran" the dog said.

"Then what was it then dog?" Majin asked smiling even though he sounded angry.

"ro rain rat rid, ruh." the dog said.

*Like after Eruption man*

"You're like actually good and stuff." Shaggy said giving a thumbs up.

"Beep bop bep boop."

"I'll sing faster this time to y'know not bore you man." Shaggy said.

"BEEP!" BF beeped in determination.

Shaggy smiled and snapped.

"Like alright man." shaggy said glowing in a white aura and hair standing up on end.

*During kio-ken*

Scooby-doo had led Ritz and Majin to a stair well that hid them from the rap-battlers.

"Rell ren rat ro rou rink rof ris?" Scoob asked the two.

"Huh, sorry scooby, I guess we misjudged you." Ritz said.

then Majin noticed that Shaggy was tapping his foot possibly causing a bit of damage to reality itself.

Eh, probably nothing he thought but even some of the most powerful beings are wrong.

"Sarv, do you feel those vibrations?" Ruv asked as the ground shook.

"Wait is it finally here, the rapture!" Sarv yelled in excitement.

"The what?" Ruv asked.

"The rapture, it's when all the good souls of the world go to heaven to join lost loved ones." Sarv said grabbing a suit for Ruv.

"Sarv I am not wearing a suit to get into heaven." Ruv said bluntly.

"But Ruuuuv I want you in heaven for you to be happy, pleaaaseee just for my sake of knowing you're in the safe heavens." Sarv said smiling warmly.

"Fine I'll wear it." Ruv said frowning yet also looking bashful.

"But if you're not coming with me then I won't be happy within heaven." Ruv said.

"Awwww WTF, this is not epic poggers!" Agoti yelled as his game crashed.

"Dude it's after one in the morning." Aldryx said rubbing his eyes.

"Well actually it's nine... at night, so yeah srry for interrupting your beauty sleep princess." Agoti said.

"Why do you speak like your texting?" Aldryx asked annoyed.

Solazar and Nikusa had turned on the lights and ended up making the brothers hiss.

"Both of you, do you not know what has been happening?" Sol asked the two.

"Well, my minecraft hypixel server is down." Agoti said.

"Yeah, because you barley touched grass in your entire life." Aldryx muttered.

"Just shush you two, besides power going out the world has been doing poorly due to this new energy, this energy I found has been classified as ZOINK energy." Sol said as nikusa took a seat handing the brothers some tea.

"Uh, sorry Nik I only drink G-fuel." Agoti said as Aldryx groaned.

"Terry how many ZOINK WATTS is he using?" the meanest mother asked.

"It-it's over... nine thousand." Terry said terrified as the mother gasped.

"How much of his power is he using?" the mother asked.

" let's see zero zero zero zero zero zero point one percent." Terry said in amazement that a single man is this challenging BF.

*Kio-ken has ended*

To be continued.

Chapter Text

shaggy had to admit the kid was tough even surviving the six notes.

"So I'm guessing you haven't seen Scoob around?" Shaggy asked.

"Bo"

"Like, I haven't seen him either, Zoinks he must be so scared." Shaggy said concerned.

"Beep!" BF said enthusiastically.

"sing again?"

"Wait, like maybe singing his favorite song will get him over here." Shaggy said on a whim.

*like zoinks this is just BF and Shaggy singing what's new scooby doo*

"Well I hope you two now know what threat we are up against. Solazar said before finding out that everyone was asleep even his wife Nikusa.

"*sigh* Everyone!" Sol yelled calmy waking up everyone.

"Uh, Sol honey not to be rude here but what was all that zoink mubo jumbo?" NIkusa.

"Well it's an energy with immeasurable power yet is also unstable to the point of being a dangerous force against the universe." Sol explained.

"That sounds a bit dramatic." Agoti said bluntly.

"Because it is serious Agoti. " Sol said sternly.

"I don't know the full extent of the power but I assure you it's very unstable and could cause the apocalypse." Sol said fearfully.

"Eh, It's probably nothing" Agoti said

*like after what's new man*

"like Scoobs is my best and closest friend man." Shaggy said opening up to BF.

"We've like been together for over seventy years man, I like stopped aging when I was seventeen man." Shaggy said smiling.

"I didn't do the same to the others because I didn't want to be selfish, But like zoinks, scoob was so insistent. He told me he would never regret this decision if meant to spend eternity by my side, now he's the only one I have left." Shaggy said holding a amulet inside was a picture of mystery incorporated.

"Beep" BF beeped touched.

Scooby had tears in his eyes from that emotional moment from Shaggy, his best friend the one who adopted him and let him live side by side for all eternity.

Scooby loved Shaggy in the way a child loved it's parent and wanted to always be there for him, like when he broke up with Velma and Kia.

*During Blast*

Matt had continued to feel the vibrations coming from the other side of the earth.

These he presumed to be from Shaggy but they were getting stronger every second .

"Duck, this power is, well powerful, but still I wonder what is causing this has that universe conquering beast escaped, no impossible he was sealed in that hellish mask by Shaggy, Lucifer, the eldritch blob, and a former highest, and an annoying demon that no one liked." Matt monolouged

"Quack"

"well still I doubt it, how could he even escape that prison." matt said looking at the sky and walking back to his house to continue meditating.

"One day father I will make you proud." Matt said.

*after Blast*

"like alright man you forced me to go this hard." Shaggy said as aura surrounded him.

"oh shit he's going super saiyan." Ritz said.

"Ro, ruper raiyans ro raggy." Scoob said.

*During SUPER SAIYAN*

Mommy Mearest had been watching the rapping as the henchmen calculated the ZOINK energy, the power level stayed at zero point zero zero one though.

"Wife what the hell is going on?" Her idiot husband asked.

"Oh, that's what I am just a wife huh?" the mother sassed.

"Wait I know that guy, Shaggy, y'know I helped him out that one time" Her husband said recalling good times.

"My Lucifer do you ever shut the hell up you are so unbearable to deal with."

"Honey are you high?"

"No I'm sick of your bull shit that's why, I'm training the kid dating our daughter." Mommy Mearest said with spite.

"You what!" The dearest dad yelled.

the two started arguing while the henchmen grabbed popcorn knowing this would be good.

*after super sayian*

"Hey uhh, is this your dog?" Riz asked walking scooby to Shaggy.

"like yeah it is man!" Shaggy yelled in excitement.

GF watched as the exchange went on and knew that his was just a regular Friday night for the most wonderful small boy in the world.

She knew this wasn't enough so she asked her mother.

"Just*kzzt* Kill*kzzt* Him!" Her mother yelled as GF knew just what to do.

in a flash she sharpened her hands and sliced Scooby Doo in half.

Shaggy then got on his knees and looked down on doo's corpse.

"LIKE YOU FORCED ME TO DO THIS MAN" Shaggy said snapping as a still surprised Boyfriend watched as he was sent flying on a rock along with Girlfriend and Ritz .

shaggy then flew up looking extremely angered with super saiyan hair and everything.

the world shuddered as the most powerful being on this earth flew up after destroying a mansion.

*During G O D E A TE R*

millions were either sacrificing one another as society crumbled.

"Oh my god they killed Nene, those bastards." Pico said as Whitty finished.

"Dear lord take these kids to hell instead of me I beg of you." Darnell prayed to the heavens while holding Skid and Pump.

"Sarv is that... god?" Ruv asked in actual amazement.

"That's not my god." Sarv said angered remembering that face.

Tankman started floating away as earth's gravity deteriorated.

"sorry cap if this looks gay to the readers" Steve said not only breaking the fourth wall but the laws of physics as well.

Matt watched as the earth crumbled beneath his feet and watched as it was more and more destroyed he wondered who could've made Shaggy this angry.

"This can go two ways, PUNK one you walk away two I walk on your face." Shaggy said with the punk shattering all windows in a planetary radius and killing anyone near it.

BF had soon repeated it in beeps.

the mad dad and the mean mother had seen the chaos that Shaggy was causing.

"What did our daughter do!" the mad dad yelled.

"I don't know!" the mean mother said.

"Oh god our poor baby girl, what have you done wench."

"Shut up you impossible to deal with buffoon!" Mommy Mearest yelled.

"Oh, I'm the buffoon not the women who sent our child to a powerful god among us!" The mad dad yelled.

"Like, enough man, I'll end this." Shaggy said snapping, causing the universe to unravel at the tips of his fingers.

Soon the universe was consumed by the void of white.

"Like scarred you didn't I?" Shaggy said goofily.

"What, What was that?" BF asked.

"Like it was training, don't worry scooby's fine, I can like bring back all dead people in just a wiggle of my finger." Shaggy said.

"GF I think you owe Scooby and Shaggy an apology." Ritz said.

"I'm sorry Mr. Shaggy I just thought BF could become stronger if you did more." GF said embarrassed handing over more scooby snacks.

"Like apology accepted dude, besides I need to get somewhere, I hear Saitama's coming there I can't miss it." Shaggy said before leaving through a dimensional door.

The trio just stood with shocked expressions.

"Hey guys Garcello got that heavenly job!" Majin said excited.

Ritz phone buzzed and his face lit up.

"Dude we got the job, California here we come!" Ritz yelled as the duo would go to a park for the summer.

and soon another day passed a rather confusing day yet still another funky Friday night except with a fuckin god. But hey Ritz and BF are going to California while the dearest are taking two therapist tomorrow.

Chapter Text

Sketchy had opened his eyes to see that he was given life.

"What the- hey I'm alive I'm with all the other doodles." Sketchy told himself seeing the old doodles.

"Hey maybe I could draw something for old times sake." Sketchy said to themselves.

she looked around and saw the perfect thing to base the drawing off of and made it, a young women with heels and a dress, perfection.

"Hey that's pretty good." Sketchy said before something was drawn before him.

It was a funky midget with an awful sense of fashion.

"What the heck are you supposed to be?" He asked as the midget beeped

"Beep"

The girl grabbed him and hugged him while the stick figure felt enraged.

"Alright you funky little midget let's rock!" They yelled grabbing a microphone.

*after line-art*

"Alright, not bad for someone smaller than Bob's dick." Sketchy said.

"Beeped" the boy said kissing the girl .

"Hey leave her alone!" Sketchy yelled.

"Po" the kid said drawing more.

"No!, I don't want to be scribbled again, I don't Want to be the old sketches again, I DON'T WANT TO BE FORGOTTEN I JUST WANT TO SHOW MY WORK TO THE WORLD!" They yelled in anger.

*During Sketched out*

Sketchy had enough of this kid enough was truly enough, they grabbed their head and started tearing it apart screaming.

*after sketched out*

"I'VE HAD IT WITH THIS BULLSHIT" sketchy said in anger.

"I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU AND HER, I JUST WANT TO SHOW MY WORK, MY SWEAT BLOOD AND TEARS TO THIS UNGREATFUL WORLD, JUST FOR ONCE AFTER NOT BEING SEEN FOR SO DAMN LONG!" Sketchy yelled crying a small bit.

"Beep?"

"IF I CAN'T BE WHO I WANT ON PAPER THAN NEITHER CAN YOU!" they yelled.

*During rip and tear*

Sketchy had ripped the page apart warping reality.

*After rip-and-tear*

Girlfriend watched as the page ripped itself destroying the drawings.

"Aww."

"What's wrong Girlfriend?" Hex who was being her mother and father's marriage counselor asked.

"My drawing was ripped apart." She said sadly.

Daddy Dearest bursted from the room he and his wife before looking down at a familiar stickfigure on the floor.

"Sketchy?" He mumbled picking the pieces of the drawing and reforming it with magic.

He remembered about how she helped him with a lot of pressure during concerts.

He soon remembered all the times his wife payed attention to him and his needs what he did was barley anything.

"Hex I realized what I did, Darnell my wife and I need a date." He said.

after the two talked and cried and hugged and set up a night to go out.

Girlfriend after the therapy and drawing set up a time to hang out that night with Carol and Annie.

That night the trio went to a park at night in casual clothes, even GF had a beanie and black coat.

"So how your folks doing out there?" Carol asked.

"Well they've set up a date night and are planning on going somewhere." GF responded

"That's great, sorry about BF going to california for the summer though I'm sure you miss him." Carol responded as a mysterious figure watched from a couple bushes to those who might intrude his temple.

"Wait what's dat." girlfriend said as she pointed at a giant floating ring.

"Girlfriend we should probably call the police or-" Carol said before girlfriend jumped in and disappeared. Carol and Annie followed for her well being.

'My master's secret must be kept' he thought these girls mustn't see the light of day ever again, and he must make sure it's not with villains.

He started to play a small bit of music getting the three's attention.

*Safety lullaby begins*

The three came across a light blue sonic-like figure.

"Come little Girlfriend, come with me, your friends are waiting stea-dl-y"

GF: Repeats in monke.

"Alone at night now we shall run with me oh you'll have so much fun."

GF: Repeats in beep bop

"Oh little mortles please don't cry I wouldn't even hurt a fly"

GF: Starts speaking FNAF lore

"Your friends clearly do not get, deep in my temple you had stepped."

GF: Starts saying how big Her BF's dick is.

"Oh little mortles please don't squirm this wave demon shall hold you firm, I had told you this is true sadly I have lied to you."

GF: skibitybopmdada

"Oh little Girlfriend you shall not leave your father for you shall never grieve" This time sounding disgusted with himself.

GF: Repeats in dumb beep boops.

"Minds unravel as more sleep allowing me to create their dreams, surly now you must know that it is time for you to go."

GF: Brutally insults the guy.

"Oh little Girlfriend you weren't clever resisting me only makes me stronger"

*Safety lullaby ends*

Girlfriend had seen a blue flash and saw her friends on the ground as husks lifeless like many before them only to see the other demon with two souls, one that was poofy and another that dripped.

She knew about this kind of magic and about control of the soul.

"Hey give back my friend's souls!" She yelled at the hog.

"Never you brought this upon yourself." He said before realizing something

"Wait a minute how are you not with them?"

"I'm a demon you foolish hedgehog just like you." She said.

"Why you, *ahem* well I guess a challenge is in order to... see who keeps the souls I guess" He said.

*After Left unchecked*

The souls had returned to the two bodies of the girls and the three walked away.

SooN thE Girls will feAr the wrath and not just from him ,they will reGrEt this day sooN enough, they will fear the name of his master.

"Master we have a slight problem with this universe." He said to the master.

"What is it?" Master asked.

"There are more demons in this world than we thought are you sure we should continue watching this universe?" he asked.

"Trust me, this won't mess up any of our plans so just make sure not to show yourself to anyone."

"Uh, about that."

"Dammit"

Chapter Text

BF and Ritz had finally made it to the park they signed up for and had been working with many people such as two "slackers" a blue jay named Mordecai and a raccoon who were like an older pair of BF and Ritz.

Then a green man who was a Douche bag called "muscle" man with his ghost pal named high five ghost were two more of their coworkers and their three bosses Pops, Skips and Benson.

BF had been raking leaves before hearing a voice in his head.

"It's near" It said.

"follow my advice and your happiness will be fulfilled." It said.

"Find my eye and start the quest." It continued.

BF just went on before seeing rustling in the bushes, but he ignored it and went on.

"Boyfriend, I need you to stop raking leaves and help Ritz with the fountain." Benson the gumball machine said.

BF unwillingly went to the fountain where as expected Ritz was there.

"Hey dude." Ritz said waving.

"Hey bro, ugh, Benson's such a jerk." Boyfriend said.

"Fair but hey you know what they say, one man's trash is another man's pleasure" Ritz said ushering a phrase Rigby taught them.

"The only pleasure I want is from my beautiful Girlfriend." Boyfriend said imagining what it would be like to see after three months.

"Dude not during work hours." Ritz said not amused.

"Hey fellas, hows the work goin?" BF's friendly Majin pal named... well majin asked

"Well besides the fact I'm cleaning a shitty fountain I'm fine." BF said.

"Hey cool an orange marble." Ritz said.

Boyfriend felt something, he felt strange about the marble and started hearing the voice again.

"My eye give it to me I NEED it Bee eff, please snag it." It said in a pleading tone

BF reached for Ritz's hand before a hand grabbed it before him, it was one of his bosses Skips.

"Sorry kid but I know more about it than you do." He said in his gravely.

BF stormed off to the leaves in rage, he hated it here in the park no GF, no Pico, Hell he even missed Double D, Darnell, and Ruv's belittlement on him he missed his home in Philly that much.

He sat himself down and cried hearing the voice again.

"STOP CRYING IDIOT, WE HAVE TO RETRIEVE MY EYE, QUIT BEING A HOMESICK BABY!" He heard it yell in his head ringing.

"BF you ok?" A familiar warm voice asked.

It was Girlfriend the sweet demon girl he fell in love with a long ass time ago.

"G-girlfriend why are you here?" BF asked.

"To see you silly, I missed you." GF said smiling and wiping tears off BF's face.

BF hugged her making the two fall over into the bushes and you can hopefully guess what happens next.

"Boyfriend, where are you, you need to get back to work." Benson said before hearing sounds of relief.

Then he saw the boy with an unknown girl with ruffled hair on the two teens.

"Aw, fuck."

"What. the. Heck. did you do Boyfriend." Benson asked intimately.

"Dude check it ouuut." Mordechai told Rigby holding an orange marble.

"Dude that's not even that cool." Rigby said bored.

"That's it, YOU'RE FIRED!" The duo heard seeing the new guy BF getting yelled at by Benson.

"Bo" the blue boy said well more beeped holding a microphone.

"Dude" Mordechai said.

"there's a rap battle, there's a rap battle, Benson's gonna lose and the crowd will be rattled, Woooooaaaaaaaaaah!" the duo rapped.

"You know who else has good rapping skills, MY Mom!" Muscle man yelled.

*During Fired*

Ritz was cleaning the fountain with Majin before feeling tired.

"Majin I think we need a break, let's ask Benson he must be willing to give a hardworking rat such as myself a break." Ritz said.

Majin stayed silent feeling tension somewhere in the park, not BF rap battling with that gumball machine tool, it was more of a tension between Boyfriend's mind.

"Majin?"

"Oh, sorry Ritzo I was just looking at the beautiful scenery." He said before hearing Benson yell "YOU"RE FIRED!"

The members of the park we're watching as the kid was handing Benson's butt to him.

"Get back to work!" Benson yelled pointing at everyone that was there.

"Hey Benson can I- get a break.?" Ritz asked surprised as BF rapped some more.

"I'll give you a break." Benson said glaring at the rat spitefully.

*After Fired*

"Well we're fired." Boyfriend said before feeling a feathery light tap on his shoulder.

"dude nice job beating Benson and sticking up for yourself." The blue jay Mordechai said.

"Yeah, as a sign of our respect take this marble." Rigby said handing BF that "eye" his mind yelled at him about.

BF grabbed it and nodded at the working duo.

"So how are we getting home?" BF asked.

"Well GF could use another portal or flight." Ritz said pissed off a bit.

"Nope too famished." GF said as the boys heard her stomach rumble.

"Well not to worry I know multiple places we can-" Bf said with Ritz cutting him off.

"Dude no were out of money and I'm sure GF can't run on sour patch kids ." Ritz said

"What about sarv-"

"NO." GF Said interrupting the rat.

"Wait I know, we're right next to Nevada, we can call Deimos." BF said grabbing his phone and getting on a bus to the border.

once they got to the border they saw a truck with the two grunts Sanford and Deimos inside.

"Hey kid jump on we'll get the girl to a hot dog stand." Sanford said as the five began their journey off to Nevada... again.

*somewhere in Nevada*

Hank was fighting just so many damn things the A.A.H.W, two furries, and that damned clown that survived his attack on that Greater good agency.

He dodged a spike thrown from a purple and red rabbit with one eye while fighting an agent and a missionary from the greater good at the same time.

He pulled a spike from the wall and slashed the agent's eye out and bashed the missionary's head in with the blunt side, then picked up the gun from the missionary's corpse and ran out of the room while taunting the rabbit.

"You should get an eye checkup, think you need glasses." Hank said mockingly.

"I'll show you blind!" The rabbit yelled in anger as Hank left the room.

Tricky had been scouting Nevada looking for Hank and to bring him down.

They always say it's for the greater good, but this time it was personal, and this clown was done fooling around.

Chapter Text

now I know about the exsisting drama between a few mod creators specifically about the Sonic. EXE and SNS mods one is a lot more simple than the other.
now if you don't know Revie (director of Sonic. EXE) Was exsposed for some creepy shit I ain't comfy talking about and the main solution is just remove EXE and Black sun, so problem solved thankfully.

the other one is Sunday night suicide, the one with Mayz who is an absolute asshat, the solution for this one was just recognize that he's an asshole and disassociate him from suicide mickey since I did have a story for him.

I also didn't mention the BNB creator since I wasn't even going to include that mod in the first place but yeah that guy's fucked up.

still most of the mods I have planned will still be included anyways so that's all see you guys in the third Mad Com chapter

Chapter Text

Boyfriend, Girlfriend, and Ritz had been on the truck for a couple hours now and were just sitting in the back.

"Hey bro, I'm sorry for getting us fired." Boyfriend said being sorry.

"Oh yeah it's totally fine that we're fired and it's all your fault!" Ritz said.

"Ritz I said I'm sorry." BF said.

"No sorrying your way from this one, you're supposed to be the responsible one yet here we are in the state of madmen!" Ritz yelled.

"Dude I can't help if I'm dumb and act randomly on impulse." Boyfriend said.

"Oh, impulse that's such a good excuse" Ritz said sarcastically.

"Dude I'm sorry, but we ain't dying out here." BF said.

"Oh, you always say that."

"Dude calm down-"

"No, I'm not calming down until I know for a fact that I know we aren't getting hurt I don't want my leg broken again!" Ritz yelled.

BF was about to say something but was cut off again by the rat.

"I don't want to lose another brother!" He yelled with tears coming from his sunglasses.

"Ritz I-"

Again cut off but not by yelling instead by gunshots.

"You kids okay back there?" Deimos asked before the window was broken by a spike.

"Oh Shit, Sanford take the damn wheel!" Deimos yelled.

"Got it." Sanford said getting in the drivers seat.

The back of the truck was blown off showing a bunch of men on motorcycles.

"This is the A.A.H.W, we know who you all are, surrender and be-" The man was cut off by a chipmunk lady parkoring on him and jumping on the Truck to give the teens a closer look.

She had a blue jacket and stitches on her eyes keeping them shut.

she then grabbed the rat by the throat and jumped off the truck's back as the head phoned grunt shot at her but she got away.

"Ritz!" BF yelled as an agent nearly shot his head off.

"look kid- *Bang*- we can't follow him now- *Bang* We just gotta hope he escapes-*bang*" Deimos said shooting agents on motercycles.

"Don't worry pal I'll make sure Ritzo doesn't die." Majin told BF before disappearing.

"Alright kiddo let's do this." Deimos said spinning his gun and standing to Boyfriend's back.

"BA!"

*During slaughter speedway*

Ritz was thrown into the building the chipmunk delivered him in, the only things he knew was, one. He's dead. Two. the lady who delivered him was sally and she was polite to him.

"So, you show up with my package Sally." a demonic looking Hedgehog that the small rat recognized as a demonic entity that he had once mad a deal with for immortality with a twist.

"Oh uh, you're that one demon I had made a deal with." Ritz said.

"Yeah Sark remember that name it's gonna be the last one you hear." Sark said angered.

"You promised your soul to me when you died however, that would only be after you ate every type of cheese, and you didn't specify too well, cause if you did there are over one thousand eight hundred different types of cheeses, so yeah you really thought well on that one, gotta hand it to you you're crafty, even to god." He monologed.

'and for a god you talk a lot' Ritz thought.

"alright you want my soul how about a deal you dirty devil."

"Ha, and what do you propose ya dirty rat."

Ritz thought about it but then realized something, his brother, responsibility got no where but dumb luck.

"Two rap-battles." Ritz said as from what he's seen and heard the third times always a bit too intense for him.

"Heh alright, and if I win the previous deal is off and I get your soul" Sark said grasping his hand summoning a crimson mic from thin air.

"Deal"

*During Bazinga*

Hank had fought off multiple forces, no wounds, only bloodshed, and this purple rabbit was pissing him off.

"Hey fucking learn to aim!" Hank yelled while pointing at his eye.

He then kicked her into a boulder then stabbed her with a spike she threw at him

"Morir Bastordo" Hank said kicking the rabbit off a cliff.

*after slaughter speedway*

"Alright a hot dog stand perfect." BF said as Girlfriend's stomach rumbled.

the two got the hot dog as they saw Hank approach the stand.

"Hey can I get a dog with everything on it?" he asked.

"oof, Sorry pal, we're all out." the Stand master said.

"I did not fight my way through multiple forces for a disappointment." Hank said in a threatening tone.

"Look buddy I- *Bang*" the tender said before a clean shot ended his time on the census.

Hank then saw the two kids about to have their hotdog.

"Hey, I want that hotdog!" He yelled as BF noticed him.

"I thought you only ate McDonalds?" BF said.

Before GF could get a much on the dog Hank grabbed his mic and screamed for a rap battle.

*during Accelerant*

"Heh, you got bars I'll give ya that but you're going up against god here kid so I might as well have Sally and that useless freak Amy do a little bit of background music."

"Alright old man bring it!" Ritz yelled, maybe this was what blissful ignorance was all about, that feeling of being in the moment and enjoying every second of it.

"Alright I'll also say ya got guts." Sark said.

then a pink hedgehog whose face was half torn and stitched appeared and started chanting with Sally

*During Crucify*

BF had been dodging bullets left right and center before something bad happened.

Tricky the clown, Tord, and Tabi had kicked GF off her speakers as Tricky started rapping and ended by yelling HAAAANNNKKKK.

BF repeated it as Sandford hooked some things up to the speakers and the three T's as Hank also sung.

then after a third turn Hank shot the clown off the speaker sending them falling.

"Blyad' blyad' blyad'!" Tabi yelled as they fell.

the three fell before stopping at a point where they would die but were saved by the scarecrow.

"Zardy thank god you're here."

"Damn, now I can't belittle him because he saved my life" Tord said bummed out.

"Always tomorrow buddy." Tricky said patting the man on the back.

*after accelerant*

Hank had pulled his mask down while screaming to end off the song.

"Fuck you won fine I'll get off your backs" Hank said as GF started smothering BF.

*After Crucify*

"Fuck I won... guess I'm free to go-"

"Oh no you don't!" Sark yelled grabbing the rat by the tail.

"I'll get my soul even if I have to tear it from your disease infested face!" He continued to the rat boy.

suddenly he got shot by seemingly nothing and recoiled dropping the Rat.

Then Ritz dissipated into thin air leaving no trace left behind.

"Damn it!" Sark yelled in anger slamming the ground with his fist.

Ritz appeared with Majin next to him at BF and GF's location.

"See no harm no foul" Majin said.

The four soon went into a portal as Ritz told BF what happened to him and how exilerating it was to live in the moment,

"Ok so we might've gotten a tad ahead of ourselves but hey we couldn't, neither could one hundred soldiers get wimbleton so we're fine... Right?" Tord asked a very pissed off Updike.

"Sammy"

"Yes sir"

"Play, Sunshine lolipops." He said before leaving the room.

"Oh you- *bzzt*" Tricky yelled getting cut off by the shock as that horrid song started playing within their confines.

"Look Man, I was just doing my thing, he already scammed me once, now he did it again!" Sark yelled at Negagen.

"Well I'm not sure if master will be to pleased." Negagen said.

"He's a master, but I AM GOD!" Sark yelled as his assassin girls came up to him.

Sark then whapped the rabbit know a Cream across the face and went to his throne to make himself feel powerful after that massive ego blow.

That rat and all his friends will perish under Sarks hellfire reign comes upon them the'll tremble in fear in front of, not a master, but GOD

Chapter Text

"Kiddo!" Majin yelled

"Yeah majin?" BF asked

"Bang" he said firing a finger from his finger which fired a bullet

"AHHH, my balls!"

"Did someone say balls!" Lord X yelled crawling from a ring

"Oh holy big ol bunny!"

"You're bottom text belongs to me"

then Lord X was slapped by a yellow hand who was Ron who had descended with memes following him down.

"Ron you saved my balls!"

"Fuk off"

Ron then was grabbed by Eduardo who crushed the folder man.

"Well well well"

"Eduardo I should've known you were behind it all!" BF yelled

"Well well well." He said kicking the boifriend.

No more Fridaynightfunkin *Kids cheer* No more *Cheer*

Chapter Text

The computer room of the greater good was examining the anomaly city known as Philadelphia.

"Sir we have found both Whitmore and Darnell wandering the street on 43rd West Street and 69th north street." one of the men said.

"What, why are these streets near each other at all." Updike asked.

"Well sir the people within are mostly idiots" the worker said.

"Alright then send the uber units for them have them both executed" Updike said.

"Yes sir" The worker said pressing a button activating the Uberkids.

Pico, whitty, Darnell, Nene, and the the kiddos had been walking down the ice cream shop to well buy ice cream, what did you think they were going to do buy milk and cereal in an ice cream shop?

They then came to it.

"Y'know nothing beats an ice cream sundae on a summer mornin." Whitty said licking his lips.

"Hey save it bomberman, you'll get plenty at the party." Pico said

"Yeah when BF comes back from California" Skid said.

"He'll be back in a week." Pump said.

"Oh really, from the other side of the country whole lotta bologna." Whitty said while imagining himself munching on a slice of bologna.

"Oh yeah, what about when he said Darnell would get hit in the crotch with a football from the stadium and it hit him strait on." Pico said chuckling.

They walked in and Pico started ordering before he noticed something...

Uberkids.

he then pointed his gun at them locked and loaded ready to fire.

The Ubers and the other two knew what was going to happen now.

"Let's take this outside." Pico said.

They all then went outside as Darnell pressed a button making a speaker fall from the sky and grabbed air freshener and a lighter while Nene grabbed her knife.

"What in the heck is going on?" Whitty asked.

"Look these guys don't play nice or fair, so use those muscle to kill em'" Darnell said.

"But carol said-"

"Fuck Carol, start kickin and punchin." Darnell said.

"A-Alright" Whitty stuttered.

"Let's shoot this photo!" Pico said.

*Unloaded starts*

It was a standoff with both sides before the first uberkid sang making Pico repeat it and then shooting the kid making another appear.

Meanwhile Skid and Pump were feasting on the Ice cream that was left all alone.

"Pump, this is great, Pump?"

Pump then popped from a container of chocolate ice cream.

"I'm the god of Ice cream Skid!" Pump said whilst having his eyes flash rainbows.

Pico threw a bar and then decided to start popping off by singing, breakdancing, and shooting and after the first half he swapped places with Nene and still shot them and after that he did them like he did tankmen.

He stayed on them as they kept rapping then he shot he shot a line holding a truck running over both Nene an the Uberkid and as that happened other shit went on Whitty went ballistic, Darnell pulled out a flamethrower, and a hyped on sugar Skid and Pump pushed Pico off and nearly got him hit by the truck and spooky danced harder than a furry on fur affinity..

Pico then was about to fire another shot but he then found out that he was out of ammo so he decided to beat the shit outta this bitch.

After the last bar he landed a strait up uppercut and punched out the Uberkid.

"Well that was somethin, let's just go to Krogers." Pico said.

Carol then showed up, smacked Darnell, and put out Whitty's fuse.

"What the hell were you guys doing!" She yelled.

"Wewenttoanicecreamshopandapparentlyheandtheownerswereenemies." The kids said.

"What?"

"They basically said we're enemies." Pico said.

"And this logo, seem familiar anyone?" Darnell asked holding a shoe of one of them that had the letters G.G on them.

"G.G, Greater good anyone?" he continued.

Everyone was flabbergasted to say the least knowing that these guys were making a come back and could strike again at anytime.

Daddy Dearest walked into the mansion of Richard Mann an old friend of his who was close in a straight way who was rich and helped Dearest produce his and his wives' albums and records.

"So you came." Ruv said coming from the shadows.

"Jesus christ, where the hell did you come from?" The fearsome father asked surprised.

"That's not important, what is is that I need your help." Ruv said ominously.

"Wait you're that church lady's boyfriend!" The dad said.

"Sarv and I just live together ok, you and I however share a goal of killing that blue pest in his own game." Ruv explained.

"Well you do seem strong enough, alright on one condition."

"Fine, what is it."

"My daughter is off limits the other two freedom to do whatever the fuck you want to them." Dearest said.

"Fine, let's fucking get this over with." Ruv said.

*During Power-link*

Dearest was surprised on how this mortal man was able to keep up with him however now was the real test as he summoned two portals to hell and made himself and the Russian go through and they continued singing as Dearest made it more and more difficult.

*after Power-link*

Daddy Dearest then looked around hell seeing the old IRIS building.

"You see that building Ruv?" Dearest asked.

"That one with the eye like symbol?"

"Yeah they're basically the unofficial rulers of hell now, but anyway I have somethin to show ya."

They went back to the mansion through portals and The father pulled a cloth at the top of the stairs revealing a painting with him, his wife, and an old man in the middle sitting on a chair.

"You ever met Mr. Rich Mann Ruv?" Dearest asked.

"He looks familiar, I think I saw him at church." Ruv said.

"Well he was a jack of all trades, but he was rich and he helped many people including me and that church lady, before he passed away." Dearest said tearing up.

"Why are you telling me all this?"

"I don't know I just felt like it, maybe I felt like it could help us connect, no homo."

"Trust me, I feel absolutely no friendly connection to anyone besides Sarv and Tankman, and maybe Steve."

"Well, that smarts, see you later asshole." Dearest said leaving angered a little bit.

Back in hell a worker for IRIS saw a poster for an invitation for a contest that Dearest, Daddy Dearest.

"Oh, boss is gonna love this one." the imp said chuckling evilly.

he then made it to the office with the boss inside a purple flaming solarsapien like demon most feared to people in IRIS INFURNUS.

"Sir, I found a flyer for something" The imp said.

"Cilliar give it to me I'm... busy" Infurnus said in a threatening tone while watching the production of a new project.

His worker Cilliar handed him the flyer and he was intrigued to say the least.

"I believe we should get ready for this do we still have that Darnell kid, if we do get him on the thing." He said.

"Well sir since I gave you that flyer maybe I can get a promotio- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH" The imp said as Infurnus pulled a lever opened a trapdoor to an in soul filled lava pit.

"Step three is almost completed."

Eduardo was in his kitchen eating Ice cream and drinking alcohol sadly because Jon was dead.

"I'm still *hic* Numero UNO!" He said before crying.

Then a portal opened up from a universe where Shaggy went Retrospecter and Jon came out of it.

-To be... continued-

Chapter Text

BF looked around seeing his good old city of Philadelphia with his Girlfriend, his little ol' brother, and his Devilish pal, he couldn't be happier about this moment, so happy in fact that he didn't know he was in the middle of the road.

"Kid get out of the road!" Majin yelled before BF got slammed in the face by a red car driven by Edd's gang.

"Holy ptsd ridden teddy bear!" Tom yelled.

The gang then ran out the car worried, not about BF but about the cola in the back seat.

"Matt is the cola ok?" Edd asked worried sick.

Matt opened a can making it spray all over the back.

"Yep, maybe don't open it for a while." Matt answered.

"Ok now let's worry at the person we possibly murdered" Edd said calmly

The three saw BF who got up in a strangely happy way despite getting rammed in the face by a car.

"I think that car hit your subconscious dude." Ritz said worried.

"Beep Boo!" BF beeped loud.

BF then threw a microphone at Edd excided signaling to have a rap battle.

"All right let's have a swell time." Edd said before Ritz was slammed by a car.

a few minutes later they made it to a sidewalk where no one would get hit by a car and so BF Challang-"Edd" Edd.

*During Challang-Edd*

the two were at the end however someone was here to crash the fun, Eduardo.

"Well Well Well." He said before singing as he Mark and Jon stood at the team, glaring them down.

however the green hooded cola lover and blue haired rapper beat the diet version of Edd.

Eduardo then punched Jon.

"Ow, I didn't even sa-"

"Shut Up!" Eduardo yelled as BF, GF, Ritz, Edd, Tom, and Matt all started high fiving.

The two trios then went their separate ways as they celebrated victory.

"Still got it!" BF yelled as GF gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Well look at you big bro." Ritz said punching BF in the arm.

They all then saw the neighborhood all three feeling nostalgic despite only being gone for a week or so.

however someone was about to ruin this nice moment everyone's favorite Russian man Ruv stopped them in order to challenge BF to a rap battle and beat him at his own game.

"Listen here punk, I'll beat you in a rap battle then into the ground." Ruv said cracking his knuckles then his joints.

"Ha, too bad that I just had a warm up, bring it you old stale Oreo reject!" BF yelled smugly.

"I'll make sure when I win to rip your vocal chords out and make you watch." Ruv said slightly pissed off.

"Beep!"

*After Revenge*

"Ha suck on that you Russian orokana fakkuheddo!" BF insulted Ruv in Japanese.

"Could you translate that." Ruv asked.

"Oh yeah, Glupaya yebanaya golova" Ritz said.

Ruv then huffed off angrily now knowing what BF said.

After that ordeal Majin and BF came back to Darnell's to meet up with an old buddy

"Yo, wassup guys!" BF yelled rhetorically.

"Hey dude your back!" Pico said smugly looking at Whitty wh handed him a nice crisp twenty dollar bill.

"Here you go." The bomb said begrudgingly.

"Hey can I see Darnell's computer real quick?" BF asked.

"Sure" Replied Pico.

BF and Majin then jumped in like it was Super Mario sixty four.

"Ok they're gone, prepare the party everyone!" Pico yelled as people like Hex and Sarv hopped out of vents which was suspicious as hell and mostly everyone else came from the stairs.

Meanwhile Boyfriend and Majin made it inside but something was different they looked like they were in an old source filmmaker or Gmod animation.

"Huh, where's that lil' rascal?" Majin asked looking around the flatlands.

the two suddenly heard a loud version of Green Hill from the distance and saw a crude thing running towards them.

"Lol u guys got $tuck in the wrong part of memes town XD, now we have to rap battle LMAO, you better win or you'll die of my cringe!" A weird blue thing yelled.

"Uh, Who the FUCK are you?" Majin asked.

"Names Sanic bruh, wow such idiocy." Sanic said.

"God kid this guy's stuck in the age of Vine" Majin said as BF drew his mic.

*After Too Fest*

"Oh no bro, I lost, it was just a prank bro why'd you have to beat my ass that hard? sanic asked in sorrow.

Sunky then walked by seeing his old friends.

"*gasp* Hellwo fwiends how've you bean?" Sunky asked in his regular face but having joy in his eyes.

"Oh we actually came to see you Sunky." BF said patting his friend on the shoulder as Sunkys other friends came in.

"Sunky, let us do the kiss now!" Silly said as Sunky happily obliged

Not even too long later BF, Majin, Sunky, Tlels, Knick-knacks, Ameh, Silly, and Crem were all sucked from the computer dimension and into real life, well not real real life their real life so to speak.

Boyfriend who's hat was on his face looked to see all his friends gathered around him with balloons and other decorations in the bar.

"What the-"

"WELCOME BACK BOYFRIEND!" They all yelled, even Ritz and GF.

"What is this."

"Well you see, it's a surprise party just for you." Hex said.

"yeah, we wanted celebrate your return!" Skid and Punp yelled in sync.

"We all pinched in to help, Edd and the gang sent the message, Sarv alerted Ruv as a diversion, I bought some of the decorations, Hex baked the cake, Pico and his pals bought the ice cream, and Sunky allowed us to stall until it was ready." Caroll explained.

"Sadly Ruv did not want to come, so I didn't force him." Sarvente said somewhat saddend.

"Eh, he's probs mad cause I roasted him." BF said proud of himself.

"I'll admit you got balls kid." Tankman said as Steve took a drink of whisky.

BF looked around seeing all the friends he made along his journey and was certain that this was a great moment of life and he'll look back at it fondly

Daddy Dearest watched the party through binoculars thinking of a scheme to kill that blue pest and free his daughter from It's clutches.

"Terry is the competition almost complete?"

"Just a last couple of kinks to work out."

"Perfect." Dearest said before getting a text about her and Carol going golfing on Sunday.

"Shoot make it at next Friday Terry." Dearest said before going back to spying.

meanwhile in the depths of hell the Iris company was working on another project, project fatality, a digital killer able to drag target into digital realm.

"Well well, this new project seems to be quite the success, our deal with prime made a great way into our innovation." Infurnus said studying these lines of code, a trapper, a machine, a banshee, meat-shield, and a disassembler.

However the strangest one was an error that was given by Prime, something unstable, unknown, unbeknownst to human understanding.

This was an interesting scene to be seen and it intrigued Infurnus.

"Sir SLASHER, is almost done, we have nearly completed the insertion of the Improbability drive and the hacker has agreed to help us for a rather large sum." Cilliar said holding her clipboard.

"Good the plan is almost competed." Infurnus said looking at his design for the robot.

In a cell, Tabi and Tord were in a cell together and the latter had a question.

"Say Tabi, why'd you seek out revenge?"

Tabi's face darkened and the under jaw appeared.

"Betrayal is a terrible experience my friend, it makes you seek something for validation, a purpose after the betrayer takes it, and that search becomes an attempt to forget the past, however you can never run away from it and eventually it consumes you until you embrace it, sometimes in positive ways." Tabi explained.

"And where does revenge take in this?"

"You see other times, the past reminds you of what they have made you, and what they took from you, your money, friends, your... sanity. The very things that make you perceive humanity and your own. You can't trust those you used to know who say that they still trust them." Tabi said confusing the Norwegian.

"AND THEY CAN'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU WERE HURT BY THIS 'ANGEL' WHO MADE YOUR LIFE A FUCKING LIVING HELL ON EARTH, AND STILL THEY WON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU'VE BEEN TORMENTED BY HER AND HER FAMILY, AND NOW YOUR STUCK WITH PSYCHOPATHIC KILLERS!" Tabi screamed as the shock collar activated on him.

Tord had written down those words and tapped his face with the pencil he wrote with and wrote something in the notepad about... experience.

Chapter Text

"BF!" Girlfriend yelled grabbing her golfing gear as Ritz took a club.

"UGH, But golfing is boring."

"Boyfriend you better golf with my daughter or I'll tear off your balls." Daddy dearest yelled after hearing that.

"Fuck me" BF said grumpily.

"Not until nighttime bee." GF said smiling.

"Well that's something to look forward to." BF said flatly

The trio met up at the course with Carol.

"So we're going to spend forty hours getting balls into a hole." BF said as Carol looked at the bags under his eyes.

"Damn you really got your party on, You're still droopy after two days." Carol chuckled.

"Screw off I barely got sleep yesterday, Girlfriend wouldn't stop squeezing me half to death." BF said.

"I was having nightmares okay." GF said poking her fingers together awkwardly.

"Aww you're having your first argument." Carol said as GF glared at her with her demon eye.

"Uh, let's just start golfing." Ritz said shakily.

The other three agreed.

GF brought out her speakers.

"Wait I thought we were golfing not rapping." BF said confused.

"You didn't tell him?" Carol asked.

"Maybe I should've told him." GF said.

"You see, we don't putt we play it like baseball." Carol said Getting her club ready.

"Now, Strike a pose, and swing" GF said tossing the ball making Carol swing it and get a hole in one.

"Holy, lemme try." BF said.

"Strike a pose, and swing." GF said as BF hit the ball scoring a hole in one as well.

"See you already got it." Carol said.

"You three have fun, Majin and I will do this classically." Ritz said as Majin appeared.

Carol then screamed as if she saw the literal devil.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!"

"Allow me to introduce myself, I'm Akuma, Just kiddin' name's Majin." The hedgehog with a man's face said jokingly.

"Oh, Kay." Carol said cautiously.

"Now c'mon Ritzo we got some golfing to do." He said as Ritz followed.

*About half an hour golfing later*

"Strike a pose, and swing." GF said yawning as BF eagerly hit the ball making it bounce off of Ritz's head and landed in the hole.

"Woo, I Did it again!" BF yelled unreasonably excited about landing holes in ones.

"Wow look at the time, we should probs take a brake." Carol said putting her club in the bag.

"Aw man, and I was just having fun." BF said.

"Hey kiddo, you might want to check on Ritzo!" Majin yelled as the three saw an unconscious rat.

"Oh, fuck what have I done." BF said agitated.

"We should get him back home, Carol do you have any ice packs?" GF asked.

"Yeah back at my place."

"Well we gotta go... fast, eh pretty good?" Majin asked goofily.

The five made it to Carol's home which didn't look anything out of the ordinary, Ritz had also waken up albeit with a headache making him punch his older sibling.

"Oh, you tryna watch Hamilton?" Carol asked.

"Oh I love Hamilton." GF replied

"Sunday hates it they say it's glorifying slave owners, like let me listen to some founding fathers spit some fire bars." Carol said.

"I mean they aren't wrong, it's like making a movie about how cats were tamed as useful for killing rats, I'd find that offensive." Ritz said.

"Well no offense but most rodents like mice and raccoons are fairly, well gross." Carol said.

"Yeah I would say that since all the disease carrying back in the dark ages." Majin said.

Ritz sighed and moved on.

"Yoo do I just..."

"Oh yeah, make yourself at home." Carol said.

BF jumped up on the couch landing on a person unknowingly.

"Ow, shit!" They yelled at the same time.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" BF asked smiling awkwardly.

"...No"

Sunday then realized something, that was the same guy on the news, in fact he was on it multiple times.

"Hey your that rich guy's daughter's Boyfriend right?" They asked.

"Heh, word gets 'round huh." BF said jokingly.

"Yeah... look I need this really big favor, you see my band is preforming tonight and my co-vocalist broke their pelvis and we need a temporary replacement, you think you could do it?" They asked.

"Sure I can do that, should we practice?"

"Yeah come on, I'll show you to the garage." They said.

The two went to the garage and Sunday nabbed their guitar.

"So this first one is basically gibberish, you can do that right?" They asked

"Ba!"

"Great let's start."

*Valentine starts*

A small lullaby started playing .

Carol heard it and got a PTSD flashback.

"Get down!" She yelled getting under the table.

"What's wrong?" GF asked.

"Eh, I'll grab some snacks" Ritz said right before the drop as Majin stood up.

"NO!" Carol yelled as Sunday screamed at the loudest decimal possible for any human to commit launching Majin out the window.

GF was in a ball curl in seconds crying for her father and sucking her thumb.

"The.. fuck.. is.. this.. SHIT!" Ritz screamed while getting pushed in the couch.

"Sunday, They play so fucking loud every damn time!" Carol yelled as Luci (Sunday's cat) jumped on Ritz scratching his face.

*After Valantine*

"Damn that was good, anyways this next one is one I hold close to my heart, it's pretty cheesy." They said.

"Bop boop?" BF Beeped questioning.

"It's a pride song" They said.

"Bi"

"How'd you guess?"

"Bee Bi" BF beeped pointing at himself.

"Nice" They said hi-fiving Boyfriend.

*BI-NB starts*

"Ok this is one of their quieter songs that won't shatter your brain functions" Carol said as Majin came back covered in glass shards.

"Ow." Majin said flatly.

The song was quieter and it did have a sick guitar solo.

"This ones closer for the concert, it's pretty edgy and political too so if you don't really feel the mood-"

"Nah, I can do that, besides I've been shot at, dropped from a giant robot, fell off a train, fought a cloud man in a suit-"

"Hold up, was that Updike you talked about, I hate that guy so damn much, he kills innocent people like Whitty and says it's "For the greater good"" Sunday yelled angered.

"Damn, but yeah I destroyed one of his bases." BF said as Sunday smiled.

"Damn it why'd you not invite me?" They asked jokingly.

"Can we get on with the song now." BF said.

*At the end of Marx*

Sunday was about to hit another chord when Carol busted in.

"Damn it Sunday can you stop please the pets are going crazy!" Carol yelled as Sunday hit one more note to spite her.

"Fuck you." She said.

"Kiddo what the hell was all that!" Majin yelled as Sunday grabbed their shotgun and shot the demonic Sonic's face of.

"Ow, again." He said flatly, again covered in soot.

"Dude the fuck was that!" Ritz yelled.

"Oh hey Ritz." Sunday said.

"Hey" Ritz said calmly.

"Seriously, They shot me!" Majin yelled.

"sorry dude, I got spooked that my sleep demon reappeared to kill me." They said

"Sunday, you don't have sleep paralysis for the last time."

"Look I think we all need to take our mind off this how about I cook something up?" BF said as GF lit up.

"Yeah he can make some mean ass Ramen." GF asid as Everyone agreed to let him cook something.

BF had finished after using all of Carol and Sunday's Ramen supply but it was worth it as he seasoned it to perfection.

"So ready for that performance tonight?" Sunday asked sipping their Ramen.

"Hell yeah!" BF yelled.

Daddy dearest had finally done it the contest was nearly complete, however he needed contestants.

"Terry how should I get some people to participate?" He asked his henchman.

"Well sir, why not hold a test for one and see who qualifies?" Terry asked.

"Brillant, and I'll have Boyfriend do my dirty laundry if you know what I mean." Dearest said tapping his fingers evilly.

"But sir we already do your laundry." Jerry said.

"Jerry you FOOL, it's an expression, I'll make BF do the recruiting." Dearest said slapping his useless one.

"Henchmen put some signs on the stage for auditions." Dearest ordered as he knew his plan was coming into fruition.

Chapter Text

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Chapter Text

BF heard Majin yelling stuff about waking up.

"Kiddo, Ritzo you guys have to judge the tournament!" Majin yelled almost furiously.

"Eh, Majin I just want to sleep." Ritz said.

Majin slapped his face then smacked the brothers waking them up immediately.

"Gah, what the hell Majin!" BF yelled.

"Kiddo if you and Ritz are late that mad dad, that furious father, he'll cut off your sack and nail it to the door like a lion doorknocker." Majin said.

"Oh yeah, he did say that, and if I don't have my dick I can't fuck Girlfriend then she'll be sad that I can't fuck her and can only do risque things." BF said scared.

"I mean you'll still have your hands and tongue." Ritz said.

"I still want my fucking dick man!" BF yelled angrily.

The dastardly dad, Girlfriend, the Mad mother, and The henchmen Terry and Carlos were waiting for Boyfriend.

"Well my little baby girl, there's only one minute left before I RIP The Boyfriend's stupid cock off!" Daddy Dearest yelled clutching his fist and imagining BF's large dick in it before recoiling a small bit.

"Dad, not gonna lie that's gayer than Pico." GF said.

"Yeah old man that's pretty gay." Pico said.

"Shut up both of you, I'll just rip it off and throw it away." Dearest said.

"Without any mention of no homo?" Pico joked.

"Just shu-"

"Did someone call for three guys who were needed to decide who's in?" Majin asked wiggling his finger.

"Ha you're... One millisecond early..." Daddy Dearest said saddened by that.

"Now who's the first guy we'll be letting in?" Ritz asked as Boyfriend got on stage

"Well first up is... Sonic, for hire!" Dearest said as Sonic ran in.

"Alright I heard that there was a reward for this shit show, what do I have to do?" Sonic asked like a douchebag.

"Sing." Dearest said.

"R-really, not a race, or how bad you can fuck something up?" He replied annoyed.

"I mean unless you fuck up singing then no, plus if you do suck then you're just a laughing stock." Dearest said.

"Fine what do I need to sing to enter?"

"Rap against that blue haired bitchy midget."

"Dad!" GF said offended.

"What I'm right."

"Look I'm not here for family drama I just want to get paid." Sonic said.

"Yeah man, just start singing." Pico said annoyed.

*After For Hire*

"So am I in?" Sonic asked with sass.

"Well I guess you can, but you did lose to a fucking Midget so..." Daddy Dearest said before shrugging cartoonishly.

"Fuck this, kids got bars, but this was re[dacted], what I can't say re[dacted] to you assholes, again fuck this." Sonic said before leaving.

"Wow, what a dick!" Majin yelled.

"Alright let's move on, how about someone less... Retro?" Boyfriend said looking at the Dearests.

"Fine, next up-"

"No need for introductions, I'm already here, Oswald the Lucky Rabbit!" Oswald yelled.

"Who?" Everyone but Ritz asked.

"Famous cartoon, first creation of Walt Disney?" He asked.

"Don't know." Girlfriend said shaking her head.

"Wait, Mickey Mouse!" Boyfriend yelled pointing out his finger.

"No, Oswald, does that sound anything like Mickey Mouse to you, I have long ears, fluffy tail, heck my pants are blue, how's that anything like Mickey Mouse?" Oswald asked genuinely confused as to how he could be mistaken for the mouse.

"Seriously, none of you guys know him, he was in Epic Mickey!" Ritz yelled.

"Finally someone gets it!" Oswald yelled.

"Look can we just get to the actual singing?" BF asked.

"Alright then let's do this."

*During Rabbit's Luck*

"I'm kinda liking it so far." Girlfriend said. "It's all nice and old timey."

"Old timey?" Oswald asked annoyed, as he continued to sing he heard whispers of when he was created before getting angry.

"I'M NOT THAT OLD!" Oswald yelled jumping angrily on the stage before rapping faster than he originally was before ending off with "Ha, how's that for an old head?" And closing with a duet from them both.

*After Rabbit's Luck*

"You know what I am done with you!" Oswald yelled while saying something about kids these days.

"Well that was strange right Ritz?" BF asked.

"Yeah, you can agree with that right Majin?" Ritz responded.

"Why of course, but hey it was pretty fun!" Majin yelled while wagging his index finger.

"What about you GF?" BF asked.

Girlfriend was silent and still, she didn't move nor speak.

"Babe?" Boyfriend asked.

"Ah, HeLLo BoYfriEND." A Mysterious Voice Said, the voice was very dial tone like that of a pre 2010s internet connection.

"Who the hell are you and what did you do to my girlfriend?" Boyfriend yelled.

"Do nOt Worry my newfOund compodRe she's cuRrently safe in Your world." The voice said soon beginning to materialize into a hedgehog form.

"Oh god dammit, am I going to have to rap battle another version of Sonic?" Boyfriend asked unaware that there are so many god damn exes that will be in this story.

"Ah, Ok If yOu mUst have a diffeRent sIght I present, JUmpmAn." The redgehog became a redder Mario.

"Look let's just fucking rap battle." BF said.

"Alright then, and if it intrigues you of who I am, My name is Fatal Error, and my mission is to end yOu and Dearest, I'll start wIth you because, well lOok at you." Error said.

"Look pal, we're in the middle of- Aah!" Majin screamed as he was teleported away.

"Holy-" Ritz yelled in surprise.

"Shall wE go on?"

"Yeah."

*During Fatality*

Error had warped them through places such as Sarvente's church, the alleyway BF and Whitty sung in, and Nevada to name a few, however there were places BF nor Ritz recognized such as voids both black and white, temples, and even a cell with old foes which surprised them equally.

Then BF had enraged Fatal enough to cause him to show a true form a blob of code surrounded by screens of Sonic and Girlfriend with black tears leaving their eyes.

*After Fatality*

Fatal roared and attempted to punch Boyfriend with the giant fist yet was stopped by a gunshot.

"Huh?, Majin?" BF and Ritz said.

"Sup I'm back."

Ritz had an idea.

"Dude distract the hot sauce thing."

"Hey shitty red boy!" BF yelled as it looked at him.

Boyfriend flipped Fatal the bird and started running towards him.

"Okay Majin, rock paper scissors." Ritz said.

Majin and Ritz started saying the things and pulled out their choices.

Majin had rock and Ritz had paper.

"What's the wish Ritzo?"

"I wish that you, me, and Boyfriend were back and the theater and that thing..." Ritz thought about it then smiled and whispered where he wanted it.

"Wish granted!" Majin said shooting Ritz, BF, Fatal, and himself.

BF, Majin, and Ritz were all soon back on stage.

"BF where were you?" Girlfriend asked.

Boyfriend immediately hugged and kissed Girlfriend making Ritz and Majin smile while making Girlfriend's parents disgusted.

Fatal woke up in some sort of temple near two blue hedgehogs who had his form.

One was light blue or maybe even cyan while the other looked like the regular hedgehog.

"Ah you're awake, welcome to our temple, my master has taken somewhat of an interest in you." The cyan one said while helping Fatal up.

"WhAt is thIs placE?" Fatal asked.

"This is our temple or you may call it our base of operations, our "boss" uses it as his hidey hole like the coward he is." The other one said.

"Anyways I am Negagen and he is Sark, we are against the highest and the blue child you fought against." Negagen said.

"I am Fatal Error, bUt you may cAll me Fatal, and I believe my emplOyers would be intErested in this as wEll." Fatal said smiling as Negagen and Sark took him to meet their master.

Updike monitored the stage once more and tapped his fingers together as who he dubbed the "Anti-Boyfriend squad" watched within their cell.

"Tabi and Zardy, I want you two to infiltrate the contest, and see what happens." Updike ordered.

"Why can't Tricky and I come?" Tord asked.

"Because you two are too much for the place to handle, Tabi is much more cautious and Zardy is known for sneaking." Updike explained. "But don't worry you'll get your time soon enough." Updike said before sitting back in his chair.

Chapter Text

Daddy Dearest, Mommy Mearest, and an average Joe were judging the contest.

"First up uh, a cartoon!" Dearest yelled.

"Hey folks I'm Oswald, Oswald the Lucky Rabbit!" Oswald yelled.

Nobody spoke or cheered except for someone who coughed.

"Well-uh, my act is a little trick up my sleeve!" Oswald yelled pulling a top hat from his pants and jumping in it.

Everyone was quiet until he appeared from Ruv's uschanka, on Ruv's head.

"Ta-da!" Oswald yelled before Ruv grabbed and threw him out the window.

"Okay, Oswald is disqualified!" Dearest yelled. "Next!"

"Hey I'm Tankman and I'll be doing comedy, *ahem* Cock Jo-"

"Disqualified." Mearest said flatly.

"Fuck you ya purple skank!" Tankman yelled before going next to Ruv, Sarvente, and Steve.

"I thought it was somewhat humorous." Ruv said.

"Thank you." Tankman said.

"Next up Pico."

"Yo wassup I'm Pico and I'm going to shoot down those drones in the audience." Pico said grabbing his uzis.

He shot multiple drones making them go down in a slightly violent manner.

He soon shot them all down and blew the barrels before holstering them again.

"That was good right Joe?" Dearest asked.

"Yes sir." Average Joe said.

Mearest had drones in her hair.

"Sorry Pico but my wife says you're disqualified.

"What, are you serious man, fuck you and your bitch ass, skank ass, fat ass, M.I.W.F (mother I wouldn't fuck) ass, dumb ass, hard ass, ass ass, pants taking ass, don't know how to cook ass, lying ass, cheating ass, dog ass, insult ending with ass wife!" Pico yelled before stepping off stage.

Suddenly the lights turned off then a singular one focused on a teddy bear, well fox plush with a violin.

It drew a singular one and started horribly playing the violin.

"Hey you're not on the list." Dearest said before grabbing it and opening a portal to the attic and throwing it in there.

"Surely that's the only time I'll see the thing." Dearest said wiping off his hands.

As the contest went on one contestant was quite nervous.

Hex.

"Yo Hex, you're going up next." BF said in the room.

"Oh, sorry I'm just quite nervous." Hex said.

"Hey man it's alright." BF said.

"I did want to perform but I'm feeling like I might screw up in some way or appear creepy to many." Hex said.

"Hey man, just cause you're a robot doesn't make you less loved by people, hell I don't think there's a single soul that hates you, plus sometimes I feel like you're the most human of any of my friends, even me." BF said.

"Boyfriend I did want to ask you something." Hex said.

"Sure."

"Would you sing with me?" Hex asked.

"Of course man, I don't even care about the prize shit, and plus for you man, anything." Boyfriend said remembering the smoker that he and Hex shared memories of.

The two then went on stage.

"Hello world, and Philadelphia, I'm Hex and my friend here is Boyfriend, we're going to be dueting for you tonight."

Daddy Dearest saw the two, he was fine with Hex but angered about Boyfriend's presence.

'Of course that midget would use the robot to get to me' Dearest thought.

"This song is what I call Cooling." Hex said before the song began.

*During Cooling.*

Ritz and Majin watched the robot and the kiddo sing to a live audience.

"Heh, the kiddo's doing well." Majin said smiling while Ritz's tail wagged.

"Yeah, I heard that he and the robot, Hex, that's his name, actually met after BF met Whitty, he also saved Hex's life." Ritz said.

"Yeah I know." Majin said.

"Hey guys" Carol said with Whitty and Sunday in tow.

"Oh hey Carol." Ritz said.

Whitty was cheering on Hex.

"Ah, I take it you're all fond of the robot as well?" Majin asked.

"Hell yeah I am!" Whitty yelled.

"Hex has been really nice to both me and Whitty." Carol said.

"Yeah he let's people like me, and the homeless sleep in his house, he donates to charity, he's literally just awesome!" Whitty yelled.

"Yeah he's the only cool billionaire in my book." Sunday said.

"I take it you are all friends with Hex." Sarvente said.

"Oh, yeah actually Ms. Sa-"

"Please call me Sarvente, or Sarv is fine as well."

They continued discussing Hex just as the song began to end.

*After Cooling*

"Thank you all for your support." Hex said.

Girlfriend then ran on stage with a trophy filled with money.

"I'd like to thank Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Whitty, Carol, Pico, Darne-" Hex stopped and went limp.

"Hex?" Boyfriend said.

Girlfriend got closer to try and tap him before he turned to her and was ready to grab her before Dearest kicked him into a wall.

"Dad!" Girlfriend yelled.

"Sweetie that robot was going to hurt you." Dearest said.

"True." Darnell said appearing from the shadows.

"Oh you son of a-" Boyfriend was cut off by Fatal Error appearing once again.

"Oh come on, I beat you yesterday!" Boyfriend yelled.

"Maybe sO, but my emplOyers and I have found oUt a small flaw, Darnell is with us." Fatal said.

"Darnell you fucking bitch." Boyfriend said.

"Hey in my defense, money." Darnell said.

"That's all you fucking care about." Carol said having climbed up on stage.

"Yeah you'd sell any of us out if Updike paid you enough." Whitty said.

Hex then jumped on stage.

"Please allow me to handle it." Hex said with a red crossed eye on his screen.

Dearest tried to punch out Hex once again but was grabbed and thrown into Mearest and Average Joe.

"Beep." Boyfriend said taking a stance.

"Oh you want to rap battle me as well, alright then let's go." Hex said with the eye expressing happiness.

*After Detected.*

Girlfriend checked Twitter and saw that people cheered for Boyfriend.

"So IRIS." Dearest said smugly."Want to explain possession of the robot."

"Simple, he was already in our database and he was also closest to you." IRIS said through Hex.

"Heh, shouldn't have answered that." Girlfriend said.

"What do yoU mean?" Fatal asked.

"Well look who's getting cancelled." Girlfriend said smugly.

"What!" IRIS yelled.

"And look who's offline." Darnell said switching back Hex.

"What happened?" Hex asked.

"What the, Darne-" Fatal was punched in the fuckin'face and got comboed by Hex who apologized for every hit he landed.

Fatal tried fighting back but was burned after touching Hex.

"Anti virus is active Fatal, Hex, throw him in the trash!" Darnell yelled.

Hex did exactly that while exclaiming that he was extremely sorry.

"Ow." Fatal said as he slid into a portal.

"Darnell please never make me do that again." Hex said.

"Alright I'll take it out of you later." Darnell said.

Carol, Whitty, BF, GF, Sarvente, and Sunday slapped Darnell across the face back to back to Back.

"So Dearest, who's Iris?" Ritz asked.

"It's not who, but what, they're a corporation in hell hellbent on ruining me." Dearest said clutching his fist.

Meanwhile in Hell back in the building of IRIS Infurnus had slammed his desk in pure unfiltered anger.

Cilliar backed away before Infurnus calmed down and breathed.

"Sir I do have good news, SLASHER is complete." Infurnus looked up and seemingly smiled.

Fatal fell in and got up while shaking off the pain.

"HellO sir, I'm sorry about thE inconvenience that CHILD put us through recently, but I do have an interesting proposal from one of my types." Fatal said.

The demons looked at him.

"We can possibly take out a group of god-like beings known as The Highest with hedgehog demons who look like my base form."

Slasher then walked in on them.

"I like that idea." He said.

Tabi and Zardy were brought back with a list.

"How did it go?" Updike asked.

"Well we found one thing out, the winner gets a ticket to Wuhu Island, A.K.A a huge sports resort." Tabi said.

"Interesting, and who won?" Updike asked.

"A machine named Hex, but I highly doubt he'd use it for himself, especially after Boyfriend helped save him."

"I saw, IRIS did something, I know it, and with what that boy is doing I'm sure he's going to cause our destruction." Updike said as Tabi and Zardy were put back in their cells.

"I'll have another mission for you all soon, but for now." Updike left.

"What, what is for now, what the fuck is for now!" Tord yelled in anger.

"Wow, he's such a dick." Tricky said.

Hex smiled at all of his comrades talking about how they were all so worried about him being possessed.

"Hex because you were the winner of the talent show both by being good and the judges loving your singing, and by technicality you get one Billion dollars!" Dearest yelled.

"Oh my, thank you so much, but I already have much more than that." Hex said.

"A wha- what?" Dearest said.

"So instead I'll give it to all my friends such as Whitty, Sarvente, Ruv, Carol, Sunday..."

*Two hours later*

"Girlfriend, Ritz the Rat, and last but not least Boyfriend." Hex finished.

"Okay I understand most of them, but, but Boyfriend, why?" Dearest asked.

"Well he's saved my life twice now." Hex said.

"Bu-but you can't!" Dearest yelled.

"Why?"

"Uhhh, because it's on the contract."

"Oh, really I never saw that."

"Because it's really small!"

"Ahh, well I don't think that's very nic-"

"Do not question me."

Hex sighed and said okay.

"You also won tickets for Wuhu Island." Girlfriend said.

Hex read the contract again and despite not seeing anything for giving money to Boyfriend there was also nothing about giving tickets to Girlfriend.

"Girlfriend I'll give you the tickets." Hex said.

"Yay, Boyfriend I'll give you one and we'll be on our way." Girlfriend said.

Daddy Dearest saw it and screamed no so loud the entire city could hear it.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend and Girlfriend had gotten to Wuhu Island for their vacation.

"So kiddo, this plane's quite a ride isn't it?" Majin asked.

He received no answer yet saw the two snuggled up with each other and asleep.

Once they arrived at the airport they took their things to the resort.

They got to their hotel room and took out Ritz.

"Cheese and rice could you two have put me anywhere more uncomfortable." Ritz said.

He started popping his joints and back.

As he did Boyfriend, Girlfriend, he, and Majin became Mii like, losing their arms and legs.

"Wow, deja vu." BF said remembering from a few months ago when he was exactly like this.

However out of their sight were a dude, a clown, a dude turned goat skeleton, and a literal straw man.

A.K.A

Tord, Tricky, Tabi, and Zardy.

"Alright, Tricky and I will survey them, you two will place the explosives." Tord (T)ordered.

Tabi sighed and nodded.

He and Zardy snuck past the rapper and his pals and got to the plane.

"Here put this on." Tabi Said before handing Zardy a hoodie.

He started putting on things that would encoack his goal skull and shock collar.

"Now we wait." Tabi said.

Meanwhile in the area Matt was sulking after a not so good interaction with his boss.

He sighed and looked at the empty boxing ring.

"Hello Matthew." A voice said, It was Daddy Dearest clutching his fist.

"How'd you get here?" Matt asked putting his fists up.

"I have a favor to ask of you, see that kid whose ass ya kicked is datin' my daughter, and I need him offed." Dearest said.

"Sorry I don't do assassinations." Matt said.

"Well I mean, I think it's fair, after all, your dad owed me one for sealing off Zephyrus all those years ago." Dearest said.

Matt looked at him and it all clicked.

Matt immediately grabbed a photo from his bag of his father, Sarvente, Bob, a highest, Shaggy, and Daddy Dearest.

"You're one of them." Matt said in awe.

"That's correct, I'm Daddy Dearest, and your father owes me on that, but sadly he's gone, so now I need you to take this kid out!" Dearest yelled before punching his palm.

Back at the resort Tord and Tricky got into a trench coat, Tricky was on top and Tord was carrying him.

That's when they saw those damned kids, smiling, laughing like they didn't destroy Tord's costly giant robot requiring him to replace some body parts, or help cause Tricky to lose all of his power and be entrapped.

The bottom line was that that child was dead.

That's when something on the intercom came on.

"Will Mr. Boyfriend come down to the boxing ring please?" A bored male asked.

Boyfriend and the gang went, leaving Ritz to carry all their stuff.

"Oh come on!" The rat yelled.

Boyfriend ran and saw Matt.

"Hey, it's the guy who knocked you out eight and a half weeks before you met me!" Majin yelled.

"How'd you know the exact week that happened?" Boyfriend asked.

"I know lots of things kiddo, lots of things." Majin said while making a reference.

"So, you arrived." Daddy Dearest said.

"Dearest!" Boyfriend yelled.

"Dad?" Girlfriend also yelled.

"That's right, I planned this from the start, I knew Hex would share at least one prize, the tickets!" Dearest said evilly.

Matt then glared at Boyfriend.

"I was almost out of a job because of you!" He yelled pointing his glove at BF.

"Then bring it on!" Boyfriend yelled as Girlfriend put on a referee outfit.

Dearest then snapped and everyone from Philly was now in the stadium, well everyone that BF either rap battled or met with.

They all started chatting in confusion, the nevadians, Edd's group, Pico's gang, even Sunky and ENA.

"Oh my, could this be a long awaited sequel?" ENA asked.

"How long ago did we do something like this?" Carol asked.

"Who cares, what we should really ask is how we frickin' got here." Pico said.

"Eh, it's actually been a while since we all got together." Edd said.

"Indeed, we should cherish this!" Hex said before hugging Tom and Tankman.

"Ugh, this is getting too sappy for me, I might get diabetes, which would dysfunctuate my erectiles." Tankman said.

"I mean when's the last time we saw these two Ruv?" Sarvente asked while holding Skid and Pump.

"Oh mah gah, so many new faces!" Sunky yelled.

He grabbed on to multiple people's faces while saying "your face" repeatedly.

"Wow, this feels weird being outside Nevada right Sanford?" Hank asked.

"Yup." Sanford said as Deimos nodded.

"Mhm."

"Quiet Deimos!" Hank yelled aggressively.

Even Static, Cyrix, and Pompom were there but aren't getting speaking roles as the author doesn't know what to do with them.

"Alright everyone, quiet down, because you're all about to watch your precious little friend, THE BOAHFRIEND, get absolutely fucking obliterated, isn't that right wife, Terry, and Carlos?" Dearest asked while gesturing to Mearest, and the henchmen.

Jerry cheered too, before everyone told him to shut up.

"So get in your positions everyone!" Dearest said.

Dearest, Mearest, the henchmen, Ruv, Darnell, and Tricky and Tord in disguise sat on the left.

Mostly everyone else sat on the right.

ENA and Hank sat in the middle, ENA because she wanted both sides to have fun, and Hank, for seeing bloodshed.

"Are you ready?" Matt asked.

Majin teleported to BF's mind and telepathically spoke to him.

"Kiddo just follow my directions." Majin said.

"Alright." Boyfriend said grinning cockily.

"On your marks." Girlfriend said.

"Get set." The audience said.

"Go." Matt said.

-After Sporting-

The right side cheered for Boyfriend's victory.

"Ha, sure showed him." Whitty said.

"How's it feel being beaten sellout!" Sunday yelled.

Annie, who was sitting right next to them, was immediately surprised by the yelling.

"Heh, sorry, they're, loud at times." Carol said apologetically.

Matt stood there and glared at Boyfriend.

"That's it, the gloves are off." He said.

"But we both have our gloves still on." Boyfriend said before getting punched smack dab in the face, making Dearest audibly cheer.

"So that's how he wants to play, eh?" Majin said.

Boyfriend got up and shook it off.

That's when Girlfriend kissed him on the cheek signaling Boyfriend to get that mother fucker.

-during boxing match-

Tabi and Zardy were placing the C4 on the plane that Girlfriend and Boyfriend would be on.

"Alright so, what's your plan?" Tabi asked Zardy

"For what?"

"For when Updike reveals that he'll kill us all anyways."

"What!" Zardy said.

"It's inevitable really." Tabi said, "I plan on taking as many with me, especially Updike." He said with pure unfiltered spite towards the cloud man.

"What if it wasn't?" Zardy asked.

Meanwhile back in the ring Boyfriend and Matt had started punching each other's fists to the beat, they eventually got so fast that they started blowing back everyone before causing a flash and pausing.

Matt's eyes then went dark before he called out "UNO DOS TRES CUATRO!" And punching out Boyfriend.

Then when Boyfriend tried fighting back, with a singular palm Matt blocked all of BF's strikes.

He continued punching the shit out of Boyfriend making Dearest cheer and Skid and Pump so angry that Pico and Carol had to hold them back.

After that whole section BF thankfully got his footing back and started fighting back again, landing some good hits on Matt before they got back to the rapid punches blowing everyone back but this time Boyfriend blocked and uppercut Matt square in the jaw, somehow launching him back.

The bell rang as Boyfriend was in the ring victorious.

Everyone except for the left cheered for him yelling his name.

"I knew he'd do it." Deimos said raising a ciggie for the Blue kid.

"That was totally wicked!" Sunky yelled.

"Yeeeeeaaaaaahhhhh, now eat his face!" Sanford yelled aggressively.

"Yay, Señor Boyfriend does it again!" Skid and Pump yelled before dancing.

"Nice job kid." Tom said.

"Guess you could say he thought outside the box?" Edd said jokingly, "he put a ring on it?" He punned again, "he-"

"Edd if you don't stop making puns I will punch your face, in the face." Tom threatened.

"Oh, quit bickering, my hair got ruined after that." Matt said with sorrow.

"Well I guess that's that." Boyfriend said.

"Not so god damn fast kid." Dearest said stepping onto the ring.

"Dearest we've done this twice." Boyfriend said before Dearest pulled Majin from Boyfriend's ear.

"Ow." Majin said before getting flicked and looking like chewed gum.

"Now it's just you and me, and oh, who's this?" Dearest asked before Ruv sighed and jumped on the stage.

Sarv gasped.

"Ruv how could you?" She said.

"The enemy of an enemy is a friend, is it not?" Dearest asked.

"Besides, I've always wanted to squash this little pest." Ruv said before getting jumped off of by Ritz who joined Boyfriend's side.

"Two on one is pretty unfair isn't it?" Ritz asked.

"I guess I can kill another." Ruv said coldly.

"Wow, edgy much." Ritz taunted.

-During Final Destination-

Both sides sung at once causing immense blowback from them on the stage.

This made Tord and Tricky leave and undress from the trench coat.

"Is the C4 ready?" Tord asked.

"Yes, and they can expect an explosive surprise." Tabi said.

-after Final Destination-

"Dammit!" Dearest yelled before teleporting away.

"Oh, guess we're stuck." Pico said.

"Don't worry, I called an uber flight." Mearest said.

"Ugh, bourgeois." Sunday said.

"Oh shut up." Carol said.

Boyfriend meanwhile helped Matt up.

"Wh-what are you-"

"Helping you up man, you did awesome, I almost felt like I was gonna die." Boyfriend said with praise.

"But I- I basically attacked you over a petty event." Matt said.

"Eh, I've been attacked for much less, the nun up there wouldn't let me use the bathroom, the girl with the bomb boy insulted me over not liking her shitty music."

"I'll club your fucking oversized skull in if you talk anymore fucking shit!" Carol yelled.

"See?" Boyfriend said.

"Hm, well thank you, you're a formidable foe if I say so myself, it was an honor." Matt said before bowing.

Everyone got on a plane besides BF, GF, Majin, and Ritz who were all ready to get on their original plane.

"See y'all back in Philly." Boyfriend said.

As the plane flew off something went wrong, the plane started going down before exploding only a bit away from the island.

Majin thankfully got the three kids and gave them all sonic shields before it did explode.

Everyone saw it though and were saddened thinking that their friends basically died right in front of them.

Except for Pump whose eyes started to glow blue.

"They're alive." He said ominously.

Pico then smiled. "Yeah, they are alive." He said believing in the Pumpkin headed child.

"Pico how could you say that?" Carol asked.

"I mean he's fought demons, assassins, the Greater Good, Nevadians, a dude in a burning restaurant, scarecrows, I wouldn't say it's far fetched to say he's kicking." Pico said.

"Yeah." Whitty said, "there's no way in hell he's dead, I'd eat my shorts before saying he's dead."

Everyone started agreeing in the fact that Boyfriend was alive, even Ruv and Darnell agreed.

Needless to say, they're right.

Chapter Text

BF and Ritz were walking down the street as Monster looked from behind a wall and malicously laughed.

"Oh wow!" Boyfriedn said, "Nice of the Girlftreind to invite us over for a picnic, Gay Ritz?"

"I hope she made lot'sa cheese!" Ritz said.

"Ritz Look!" BF yelled pointing to a note on the wall. "It's from Monster!" BF yelled. "Dear Pesky Rappers, The anti-BF-Squad and I have taken over Philidelphia, The Girlfriend is now a perminant guest at one of my seven evil hotels, I dare ya to find her if you can." BF read off the note. "We gotta find The Girlfreind.!"

"And you gotta help us." Ritz said pointing at you the reader.

"If you need instuctions on how to through the hotels check the Chapter Notes." Boyfriend said pausing and staring into your soul.

The duo approached a corn field.

"looks kinda peaceful." Boyfriend said.

"Looks like a seeding where scarecrows are involved." Ritz retorted.

As they got ot the fence BF stepped over Ritz as an unnecessary boost making a slide whistle noise.

BF approached a pipe in the ceiling.

"Uh Oh" He said as it sucked him up.

that sucked him up and made him tumble through said pipe.

"Where am I?" He asked looking around.

-After Zardy boss fight"

Zardy Jumped out of the tree and started running before BF and Ritz jumped out after him.

They looked back to see fresh corn growing off the cobs of the maze.

They saw Girlfriiend on a wilting vine.

"Hey girlfriend!" BF yelled before she fell into Tord's arms as he ran into his hotel where he ran up the wall and onto the hotel with flickering lights.

"How are we going to find Girlfriend with the power going out?" Ritz asked.

"Maybe there's a switch in one of the rooms." BF said. "Remind me to check." He asked You again.

Boyfriend went inside of Tords Toaster Room.

"Ah ha, here's the problem, too many toasters!" He said as sparks flew. he then took out a bag of Monster's Sourpuss Bread. "You Know What They Say. "All Toasters Toast Toast" BF Said as Majin appeared.

"NO THEY DO NOT THEY TOAST BREAD DUMBASS!" Majin yelled. "ALSO THAT'S NOT A SAYING! THAT'S AN ACTUAL FACT! THAT'S LIKE SAYING "Oh you know what they say 'fire burns.' OF COURSE FIRE FUCKING BURNS!" Majin yelled as BF Unplugged the toasters making toast come out of the toasters.

this made the hotel light up.

-After Tord's boss fight-

BF and Ritz nailed a sign saying "Condemned" on it.

"That oughtta do it." He said to Ritz.

GF waved to them next to a computer before getting sucked in.

"Where'd she go?" BF asked as Ritz pointed to a digital hotel labled "Fatal's Data Hotel: This Mine is Mine"

The two walked up to it.

"Gee it's kind of dark" BF said.

"Did you bring a light?" Ritz asked.

"No?"

"Well maybe a node will lend us his if we persuade him." Ritz said in an awfully dark tone as they walked into the mine.

-After Fatal Error Bossfight-

The two rappers ran out of the mine as it blew up making GF cry "Boyfriend!"

"Get ready to catch her!" BF yelled.

"She's not coming down!" Ritz said.

"She's up there!" BF said pointing at a hotel in the sky

BF climbed up a grey building before lloking at you.

"gee it's awfly hard to see through these clouds, hope we can get rid of them. Get the hint?" He asked YOU.

BF went to a button that said "I'm your biggest fan." in red text.

"Ah ha!" BF exclaimed before pressing it making a fan blow to make the clouds dissapear.

-After Tricky bossfight-

BF, GF, and Ritz ran out the hotel as Tricky chased them as a fan powered up to a fast speed.

"Hey you, get off my cloud!" BF yelled as Tricky was blown away with his hotel.

GF was then teleported away.

"It's been one of those days. C'mon Ritz!" BF Yelled as they went down the grey building to Tabi's Temple Hotel.

"We ain't afraid of no Russians!" BF said before the door dissapeared and reappeared.

"Woah." Ritz exclaimed when it dissapeared as BF opened it yelling "Hurry!"

BF went into a bathroom seeing Monster's Medical Prescriptions saying that it keeps illusions away.

"Maybe this will keep that goat man from playing with the doors!" he said taking the meds.

-After Tabi's boss fight-

The boy and rat ran out of the hotel as it crumbled to nothing but it's frame.

"Spooky" BF said. "Where's The Girlfriend?" BF asked.

Ritz pointed at Bob's Hotel yelling, "Over There!" in response.

"Be careful, when you pinch Bob's pennies, they pinch back." BF said to you.

BF hit a Piggy bank making it spill out her coins.

"So this is where Bob hid all the real coins!" BF Said.

The two walked out as the hotel teleported away.

"That wasn't so hard, was it?" BF asked Ritz.

"Boy-" GF was cut short by being teleported as Monster laughed.

"That's that creepy monster's laugh." Ritz said shuddering.

"Look!" BF yelled as they followd a trail of juice Leading to Monster's hotel. "This is it Ritz." BF said, "Remember where there's juice." BF paused

"There's fruits." Ritz finished.

they walked into the final hotel.

-After Monster's Bossfight-

The Three ran from the juice that spilled over Philidelphia making it all... Philly nice again.

"Thank's to you two I can safely funk in Philidelphia again, free from the terrible lemon demon. The two were kissed by Girlfriend. "And thanks to you too." She said staring at you the reader yes you.

Chapter Text

Darnell was examining his bills before seeing the Tankman Excursion Contract (Week 8 Jesus Christ) "Hm, seven hundred fifty thousand, taken out for failed job, what!" Darnell yelled as Nene's operation finished.

"What's up?" She asked.

"Wha- oh yeah you talk now, dammit, Pico not killing that blue haired chi... I mean orienta... I mean- never mind." Darnell said stopping himself from saying something racist. "Point is, we're out seven hundred fifty thousand dollars USD for both failing to kill BF and retrieving his corpse!"

"OMG. You. Are. Fucking. Kidding!"

"Nope, and someone has to pay, with cash, card, or otherwise." Darnell said grabbing a spray can.

Meanwhile in downtown Philly, The Ginger and bomb were in a most high-class store.

"Whitty." Pico said, "welcome to 911!" Pico yelled. "Two slushies!" Pico said handing nineteen bucks to a worker named Rick.

"What kind?" Rick asked.

"Watermelon for me and, Whitty what do ya want?" Pico asked.

"Blue!" Whitty yelled.

"Blue raspy." Pico said. "Keep the change, Rick." Pico said.

"I hope you perish one day." Rick Ricksponded.

"hahahahahahahahahaha, Ha, classic Rick." Pico said before pointing his Uzi at Rick. "Keep your damn change and get us our slushie."

The duo walked out drinking their slushies.

"Man, two dudes hangin' out, nothing could be better." Pico said.

"Sure I guess, I love this flavor though, and I do feel welcome with you, Carol, Wednesday, and everyone else." Whitty said smiling.

"Well thanks Whitty I'm glad you feel... that way" Pico said seeing before seeing a pink and white figure.

He was confused by her presence before seeing her draw a knife and start running towards him.

"Shitshitshitshotshit SHIT!" Pico yelled before running and dodging throwing knives through alleyways, he was hit by a ladder and blacked out for just a second before seeing what it said.

"Lever warning, Staris Drop!" It read.

Pico got back on his feet and waited for Nene to catch up and throw a knife while aiming his Uzi, when she threw it he fired the gun using the knife to ricochet the bullet to hit the lever making the ladder hit Nene.

"Phew, *Ack, koff* Fuck, Hella run." Pico said.

"I'd agree." Darnell said while finishing up a tagging.

"Shit!" Pico yelled.

"So you know about it too?" Darnell asked.

"Wha- what?" Pico asked.

"Dearest took out Seven hundred fifty thousand bucks from us after your two fuck ups of not killing the bastard." Darnell said.

"Look you and Nene were in on scamming his ass, I don't know how he got cash backin' but you can't just blame me!" Pico yelled.

Nene caught up and cut her hand with the knife before licking the blood.

"Jesus Christ!" Pico yelled. "Nene Unnecessary." Darnell said while tapping his foot. "Look, Pico you have two options, A you go down quietly, because you're going to be circumcised, possibly again." Darnell said looking at Nene.

"Ha good luck. Whatever that word means." Pico said.

"We're removing your foreskin, dick, and balls." Darnell said as Nene drew out a knife.

"Hey now!" A robot yelled before landing, they had a green paint job and their chest seemed like an audio board. "This here is ol' A-bot's turf, and here, to settle things, y'all oughta rap." They said before transforming into a speaker system.

"It's always fucking rapping." Pico, Darnell, and Nene said.

Nene kicked off A-bot's head and sat down.

"I'm going to pour gas on your nuts and set them on fire when we're through with this." Darnell said.

-After Darnell-

"Alright can we cut off his balls now?" Darnell asked as Pico started sweating.

"Nope the ginger won that one. you've got two more tracks, best two out of three are the rules." A-bot said.

"Dammit let's just do it again!" Darnell yelled.

-After Lit Up-

"All right Pico wins!" A-bot's head yelled before Nene kicked it extremely far.

"Shit, Nene I would've just told you to gab his legs!" Darnell yelled.

"Well, I'll give you an offer, offer A see's us in one last rap battle where I either keep or lose my balls, offer B sees a gunfight where one of us gets arrested." Pico said.

Darnell snarled. "This is why you are one of my best agents, quick footed and quick witted." He praised before drawing a spray can and shaking it. "I say both." He answered Pico's offer.

"Fuck." Pico said flatly.

-During 2Hot-

Darnell had started using these spray cans to become bombs that Pico shot out of the air in order to avoid that shit until the song ended.

"Ha time to end-" Pico pulled the trigger with no bullets coming out. "-You" Pico scowled before dropping the gun and holding his fist.

"Welp time to roast some chestnuts before the holiday-s" Darnell said before seeing his lighter was outta gas, "Fuck" He said before throwing away his shit and holding up fists.

-starting Blazin'-

The two were fist fighting each other and had brawled, blocked, sacked, tapped, and other fightin' words.

Pico punched, Darnell Dash attacked, Nene... sat there like a bitch, Whitty... was nowhere, Pico swung, Darnell Dicked Pico down non-sexually mind you.

Pico tossed Darnell with an uppercut before grabbing his feet like a Nickelodeon producer and slamming him on the ground before Darnell got up and kicked Pico in the face before the ginger threw another punch but the anagram of ginger threw a nasty uppercut, before Pico did another punch and Darnell did another kick sending Pico back and leaving both dripping with blood.

"Heh, you tough son of a bitch" Pico said while wiping blood off while smiling.

"Ha, knew you were my best agent for a reason" Darnell replied as the two dapped each other up and began walking before immediately fainting, Nene meanwhile was looking at a photo of BF and was enraged, tearing it up before getting hit by A-bot in the head as Whitty came back still drinking the slushie.

"Whitty could you carry us to the hospital?" Pico asked with his voice muffled.

"Well turns out friendship wins the battle." A-bot said before transforming back to his normal self.

"Damn chud." Darnell said as Whitty held him and Pico upto take them to the hospital.

Updike examined the Debacle from a tower and scoffed. "Criminals." He said as he looked at his computer with the money he "Commandeered" from the scumbags Dearest paid a fortune to, he grimaced at how this city was full of more dangers to humanity, second only to Neo City and Nevada, the former of which was more due to crime than anything.

However Fatal had also been watching from another tower and knew to follow Darnell. This to say, Philly will have a war on it's hands, The Company, the Government, and a rag tag group of somewhat good to not at all friends, three fronts, three sides, and only a few possibilities, all of which saw death in the wake.

Chapter Text

Boyfriend woke up in heaven again like the last time he fought Matt.

"Oh, what's up Little Man." Garcello said.

"Is this like last time?" Boyfriend asked.

"Yeah, heh, been a while." Garcello said.

"Yeah, glad to see you're in heaven, what's all this by the way?" Boyfriend asked.

"My office." Garcello said before taking a sip of soda.

"Woah, you have an office?" Boyfriend asked.

"Hell yeah, minus the hell, it's your second time up after a long while too, what's it like down there?" Garcello replied while making him and Boyfriend tea.

Boyfriend explained his endeavors from destroying the Greater Good's headquarters to fighting demon hedgehogs.

"Heh, sounds like you're having yourself an adventure, good to see that little man." Garcello said as Majin went in.

"Kiddo wake up you're bridging on death but you can make it, I know so!" Majin yelled as Garcello waved.

"Hey Gar, now kiddo-"

"Actually there's a go back chute if you want him to go down." Garcello said pointing at a chute with the label of "Go Back Chute".

"Huh, neat." Boyfriend said as he jumped down yelling "Bye Garcello!"

"Heh, see you on the flip side little man."

Boyfriend then woke up to see Girlfriend and Ritz wobbling around as the latter coughed up some sand.

"Sweet Cheesus taketh me back to thine cheese heaven, father I craveth cheddar!" Ritz screamed in seeming agony.

"Oh, guys look, a forest uh, plains-ey area for us to find food!" Girlfriend yelled.

The three wandered in before Majin appeared.

"Well it seems like you three were safe and sound." Majin said with a cheeky wag of his finger.

"Screw you I was in cheese heaven." Ritz said tapping his foot.

"Well you're still alive right now!" Majin said.

"*Sigh* Fair enough, I guess, thanks." Ritz said.

Girlfriend grabbed the boys in a hug.

"I'm just glad we're all safe." Girlfriend said before they heard a loud noise from the east.

They looked to see a green limbless pig roll down to them.

"Ew, ewewewewewewewwwwww!" Girlfriend screamed in disgust.

"Beep." BF beeped.

The pig looked at Girlfriend and Ritz while licking his lips.

"Ugh, stop looking at me you perverted pig!" Girlfriend yelled.

"Ugh, don't touch me either." Ritz said backing away.

"C'mon guys, he's just a little guy!" Majin said.

"Yeah!" BF yelled doing a peace sign.

-After Cake Race-

Ritz looked at the singers and had an idea.

"Guys I have an idea!" Ritz yelled.

"What is it little bro?" BF asked.

"I-ay an-cay eak-spay ig-pay atin-lay" Ritz replied.

"What did you just say?" GF asked.

"Dude what language is that?" BF asked.

"Pig latin it should work with this guy to lead us to something!" Ritz said. "An-cay ou-yay ead-lay us-ay o-tay ivilization-cay?" Ritz asked as the pig looked at him funnily.

"Ritzo you racist, a pig can't speak human." Majin joked as the big hit the shin of the Weiner boi. "Gah!" He yelled.

"Beep!" Boyfriend yelled catching the pig's attention.

"Oink?" It asked.

"Bap boop bee pa!" BF yelled.

Immediately they were led to a castle with more pigs inside and a big one with a crown.

"Huh, I guess you speak better than I do." Ritz said.

"Bap bappo!" BF yelled to the pig who brought them there.

-During Courtroom-

A pig with a chef hat and a handlebar moustache saw GF and Ritz and thought... 'delicious'.

He took the two while BF was distracted.

-After Courtroom-

BF cheered on himself and jumped up and laughed before noticing that Ritz and GF were nowhere to be seen.

"Eh, where are you guys?" BF asked before hearing screaming.

He ran to where he heard it and saw the green pigs about to cook the rat and demon with them hanging on a rope over a pot.

"What the fuck?" BF asked.

"Dude, these pigs want us in pieces, to be uhh, hm, trying to think of AAAAHHH-" Ritz yelled as he and Girlfriend were lowered closer. "Literation." Ritz said instantly becoming calm.

"Woah, don't worry guys I'll save you!" BF yelled.

"Babe, I'm a demon." GF said.

"And I'm, uh, nevermind go ahead." Ritz said.

"Bap!" BF yelled while pointing at the pig king.

"Eh?" The king exclaimed.

"Ba ba, bad pig!" BF yelled before flipping him off.

"Ugh!" It exclaimed again as the pig leading them there scowled and blew raspberry making the other pigs join in.

Immediately BF and Majin were on a flying machine contraption.

"Wow, is this a genuine doohickey?" Majin asked as BF looked around.

"Wow this was fast." BF said while looking around and seeing his Girlfriend and his Brother still tied up and next to a pot.

"Don't worry, I'll save you two!" BF yelled before an engine started and his aircraft started making both him and the pig launched into the air.

"Ho-ho holy shit I'm flying!" Boyfriend yelled as Majin laughed with him.

"Haha! We're flying, free as birds!" Majin yelled.

Next to them the pig laughed and they began the song.

-After Bad Piggies-

Boyfriend, after dodging punches and suction cups had beat the pig and had won!

"Ha, I funkin' did it you bastard!" Boyfriend yelled having won.

Immediately he was hanging over the pot with Girlfriend and Ritz.

"Fuck!" BF yelled.

"Well, I guess we're done for, any last words?" Ritz asked.

"I would be so horny if you weren't here Ritz." Girlfriend said.

"Um, I don't know how to take that so I'm going to erase that idea from my mind so I don't die with that image in my brain to be forever remembered." Ritz said.

"Well I'm sorry guys, I failed." Boyfriend said.

"Look babe you tried, and hey you looked sexy while doing it." Girlfriend said before whistling.

"Wait, Majin, you should... oh wait." Ritz said while seeing Majin's gloves which were also his hands being eaten.

"Welp, it was an honor knowing you-" Majin stopped before dodging a bird that hit the pig eating Majin's hands making it spit them out.

The squad saw the birds coming down like a hammer of wrath, the birds landed everywhere and one had even cut the three loose and allowed them to escape.

"So what's the plan?" Ritz asked as BF saw a slingshot.

"Well I'm no Einstein but I am a Boyfriend which means I'm better than any Einstein" Boyfriend said before getting to the sling shot.

"Wait, Boyfriend, you're a genius, Girlfriend hold us!" Ritz said as GF grabbed them. "Now start walking backwards." Ritz said as GF took a few steps back and stretched it out. "Now open the wings... and FIRE!" Ritz yelled at the trio was launched into the sky and flew away from the island.

Fatal was scheming, plotting, one would even say... brainstorming.

"So, I need a way to kill that pest when he eventually comes back." He said while biting down on a piece of code. "Delicious." He said to himself.

He was examining places all around Philly and was making an idea before seeing a park bench near an abandoned building and seeing a light blue... light from a hedgehog.

"Hmm, what brings you here, if you're here for my master, I apologize but he's in a meeting of sorts." The blue hedgehog said.

"Meeting?" Fatal asked.

"Yes, with some foes more powerful than you'll ever hand-" He was cut off by Fatal having disappeared. "-le"

Fatal saw some faces, two in particular were Dearest and Lucifer, or Sarvente as she called herself.

"Now look, I understand this mask business is a big deal but I must prioritize my daughter!" Dearest yelled.

"Yes, and Boyfriend is also someone we need, as he is possibly a great asset." Sarvente added.

"Bah, that shrimp is probably causin' all this mayhem, I bet he's behind all of it, he's no good I say!" Dearest trailed.

"Dearest I understand, but he's beaten everyone in this room." Fatal saw that the fabled Matt was speaking.

"Like, yeah man, he's got skills with that microphone man, if I were to say he'd be able to rap against us all at once." Shaggy said. "Maybe even on Red, but I like digress."

"Not everyone..." A voice said, Fatal scanned him and saw his code was connected to many like him, he looked like the Sonic that he corrupted, however his eyes were black with white pupils and blood dripped down his face. "Not me." He spoke with an accent, most likely from Russia.

"And what do you say to this?" Matt asked him, not even for the name.

"I believe an eye should be close on him, maybe Dearest is correct in his assumptions and the rapper is only pulling us into a deeper hole than needed." He said. "Two pieces have been found already, it can only be a matter of time before he's fully restored, however once we deal with him again I believe that whoever responsible should be executed."

"Like, that's already a serious accusation man."

"I am only saying that we should be prepared for him, we're already missing one of our own."

Fatal had enough, and so he left and started viewing those like that hedgehog, and perhaps some unlike him but connected all the same, this nightmare was only beginning now.

Chapter Text

BF woke up in a dark area nothing around him besides darkness. "Yo, anyone here." He asked. "Girlfriend, Ritz, Majin... Dearest?" He asked the darkness around him.

"N-no please, not again." A weak voice said from above. BF looked up and saw Dearest bound within a web, he was pale and malnourished with some of his bones visible.

"Damn bro, what happened to you?" BF asked.

"You, you took everything, my wife, my home... My sweet baby girl is gone, you took everything from me!" He yelled, his voice was dry.

"Ain't no way I did that I'm not a spider!" BF yelled.

"What is this, are you attempting to toy with me by playing dumb?" Dearest asked.

"Look man I- why are you looking at me like that?" BF asked as Dearest's eyes widened.

"boo." A voice behind BF said. BF looked behind himself and saw himself before stepping back.

"Damn, is this a mirror or something?" BF asked.

"No, it's you, or are you me?" The BF on the other side said with a smirk, he was also pale and had some kind of cuts on his face below his eyes leading to his mouth.

"I don't think I'm you." BF replied.

"Hm, could you move a sec Dearest needs something." BF's double said as Dearest's eyes widened. The doppelganger then snapped and Girlfriend was lowered down by a string around her neck.

"No, please, not again not he-"

"Quiet!" BF's double yelled as strings slowly came from his fingers before GF was hung up, soon her Head slowly split from her shoulders as well as her mid-section splitting in half. Her eyes shined blue and red as her hair covered them as well as her mouth which had morphed into a hole of sharp fangs.

"Damn, still hit though." BF said as his double stopped everything and slowly turned to him before lurching to him.

"Hm, nevermind me watching, Gore-Friend, tear him apart, slowly." He ordered.

"No, sweetie no please I- AAAHHH-" Dearest screeched in pain as the BFs were teleported to a black void.

"Why are you here?" The double asked.

"Man I dunno, I just fell asleep in my hot girl's arms and then woke up here." BF said.

"Well since I have you, why not a-"

"Rap Battle?" BF interrupted eagerly.

"Yes" His double flatly replied before taking out a microphone.

*After 48 65 6C 6C 20 49 6E 63 61 72 6E 61 74 65*

BF crossed his arms and nodded with a grin. "Still got it." He said.

"Oh, how interesting, say how about we raise the steaks!" BF's double said before stomping causing a lot of vibrations, the ground cracked revealing a bunch of goons.

"Wait Pico?" BF asked seeing Pico with a gun lodged in his face only having his lower jaw. "What happened to him?" BF asked stepping back.

"Oh, I had enough of him fucking around and not singing!" He said ending his sentence by yelling at Pico.

"Jeez dude calm down he's our-"

"Next Song" The double said with a snap.

* D̸̮̤́ų̸̆̄r̶̩͒̒ĭ̴͕̕n̸̜̊̇g̷̙͌̿ 53 69 6E 6E 65 72 73 20 4D 75 73 74 20 44 69 65*

Boyfriend watched as his copy's goons had risen from the earth, A version of Ritz that was thin and lanky crawling on all fours, there was a sonic like creature with its upper head sliced off and arm torn off with an X on its stomach, Pico but if he was Chainsaw Man but a bootleg one with guns, Tankman but molded and rotted like a zombie, all crawling towards his feet as a cliffside rose up as well as the double's rising as he shifted from boy to fox to child and- Pico, what kinda Tom Fuckery was going on. They continued singing before BF was hit by a microphone and fell into it with the song concluding.

*After 53 69 6E 6E 65 72 73 20 4D 75 73 74 20 44 69 65*

BF awoke in some form of church and looked around seeing that it was Sarv's church he then saw himself again before the doppelganger ripped off the flesh of his face revealing two strange eyes like Bob's and teeth like that lemon monster guy.

“I'm done with you, I will kill you and feed you to the congregation, and make you feel every bite and nibble on your…” the doppleganger paused as BF looked back. It was a bright light coming towards them and engulfing them making Boyfriend wake up in Girlfriend's arms next to Ritz.

“Bae, you okay?” Girlfriend asked.

“Eh, weird dream but that's it, hey look a blinding flash of light!” Boyfriend yelled as Girlfriend looked up and was blinded and screamed.

“AAAHHH-” She screeched as she dropped the brothers whom also were flashed and fell, they then woke up in a carnival tent that appeared to have broken their fall, Ritz sighed before BF got up and looked at all the tiles before seeing fun house mirrors.

“Hey Ritz look, funny mirrors, look at this one!” BF yelled as Ritz looked, in that one Boyfriend was a blue cat and Ritz was a goldfish with legs. In another they were two boys without mouths, Ritz had darker skin but other than that they were the same, another had BF as a green thing with red eyes and antennae while Ritz was a robot with blue eyes and a single antenna.

“Dude, that's freaky.” Ritz said as he saw a mirror where he was a Blue bird with glasses and Boyfriend was a person with blue skin and blueish hair.

“Yeah but awesome!” BF yelled as he saw himself as a man in some form of riot gear and Ritz as some Gay blonde in a lab coat.

“I mean I guess but, some of these are out of pocket.” Ritz said pointing to a mirror where he was a boy with a pine tree hat and BF was a yellow triangle with a single eye that looked surprised and disappeared as the boy ran after it. “What the hell, dude did you see that?”

“I'm seeing you as a dog.” BF said as Ritz looked and saw BF as a buff dude and himself as a German Shepherd.

“I look stupid.” Ritz said before they approached another Mirror that was Just Boyfriend.

“Huh, that's weird, where's the funny?” BF asked before getting hit in the face with a microphone and falling backwards as a taller and lankier version emerged from the mirror.

“Dude I think you're gonna have to rap battle… Yourself.” Ritz said