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𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘮𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘩 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘴--
The last big storm of the season was impending, James had been listening to some of the others talk excitedly about it.
Some people loved storms, loved the flashes of the lightning lighting up the sky, the sound of the heavy rain and the wind whistling. The rumble of the thunder that could occasionally be so powerful that it shook buildings and their occupants.
...James wasn't a fan, really.
Rain, by itself? The gentle pitter patter of it against a window pane or the metal roof of a vehicle?
Hell yes. That was comforting and relaxing, he could certainly get behind that.
But full on storming?
It's why he was in his room, pacing like a wild animal in a pen at a zoo. All rippling muscles, tense and anxious, his stormy grey-blue eyes darting to the window every few paces, just waiting for the first flash.
FRIDAY had his music playing loud enough that it drowned out most other sounds, which he was utterly thankful for and she was an absolute godsend-- he said this to her, of course, and told her that she better not tell Tony he'd said it. He might let it go to his head.
𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘢 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯 || 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘮𝘺--
The first clap of thunder made him falter in his tracks, his body clearly tensing as it going into fight or flight mode.
Can't fight a storm.
Can't fly at, away from, or through a storm.
Had to just wait it out.
It takes him a few moments to compose himself again, his breathing coming a little more shallow now, far less calm.
[Sergeant Barnes, would you like me to initiate the grounding sequence?] FRIDAY's voice interrupted the music and the flood of thoughts convoluting in his brain.
"Yes--" he gasped, like a man drowning, trying to get air back into his lungs instead of the water that just never seemed to end. The panic always felt like drowning. Like falling.
Like ice on a train flying over a ravine.
Like letting go.
[Very good Sergeant Barnes,] FRIDAY lowered the music volume and as Bucky kept pacing, started the grounding sequence.
[Please name 5 things that you can see, James.]
Bucky squeezed his eyes closed a moment, pausing in his pacing to take a deep breath through his nose. As he let it out, he opened his eyes again and looked around the room.
"My bed, which I need to wash the blankets on," he grimaced a bit at the messy bundle of soft blankets and pillows. "Lyla," he said next, his gaze flicking to the stuffed white wolf perched among all his mess of blankets. "My books. The towel I left on the floor last night," he made another face, his nose scrunched a little before another clap of thunder made him actually physically jump, his heart pounding in his ears.
[Breathe, James. One more thing you can see, please.] FRIDAY encouraged gently.
He dropped to his knees, his hands clutching at his head as he sucked in a deep and shuddering breath.
"...Scumpi. I see Scumpi, sleeping in the corner."
[Very good. Now, please name 4 things that you can feel.]
"My hair," he replied automatically, his fingers flexing in it, tugging lightly to distract his mind from the fear creeping through his bones. "...the carpet beneath my legs. It's really soft..." Absently, his right hand slipped away from his head to brush through the plush carpet, thankful for not the first time to Tony for the arrangements he made for Bucky to stay here. "My heartbeat. Feels like it's going to bruise my ribs," he muttered, brow furrowing in frustration.
[It's only temporary, James. You're doing very good. One more.]
Another heavy sigh out, and he nods, leaning his head back to look up at the ceiling. "...ashamed," he muttered, closing his eyes.
[Fear is nothing to feel ashamed about, Sergeant Barnes. It is a natural occurrence in the body, brought on by sources beyond your control. Boss has fears too, you know.]
He huffed a soft laugh, the corner of his lips twitching upwards. "Thanks, FRIDAY."
[Of course. Next, please name 3 things that you can hear.]
"Your voice. Has anyone ever told you that your voice is soothing?"
[You have, previously. But thank you, James. I'm glad to know that my voice can help to ease your tension in these times.]
Bucky chuckled softly to himself, letting his gaze drop back to the floor. Focusing, he listened for any other sounds around him.
"I can still hear the music a little bit. And... I think that was my phone buzzing," he murmured, pushing himself to his feet, a little wobbly yet, but far less shaky than when he had originally dropped to the ground.
[Very good, James. You have a message from Baron vonFluffyCoat. Would you like me to read it to you before we carry on to the next step?]
James felt a flush of warmth to his cheeks and a different sort of race to his heart as he rushed to grab his phone from the nightstand.
"No, no! That's okay, uhm... next step, please and thank you."
There was a pause, and goddammit he could tell that FRIDAY had gotten some bit of amusement from his reaction.
[Please name 2 things that you can smell.]
"The rain. That wet earth smell," he supplied quickly, opening his phone to check that the message wasn't anything urgent, and that it could wait until after he had finished his grounding exercise.
"...I think someone is baking," he added, taking a breath through his nose, lifting it to the air to try to catch a better whiff. "...cookies, I think."
[Boss is in the kitchen at the moment baking cookies, yes. Finally, please name 1 thing that you can taste.]
Frustration furrowed Bucky's brow as he stared down at the dark blank screen of his phone, the metal and flesh of his hands.
"Bitterness," he murmured, his shoulders relaxing as the music turned back up, marking the completion of the grounding exercise.
"Thank you, FRIDAY," he hummed, looking to the little camera in the corner.
𝘛𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 || 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺
𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 || 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺--
"Can you please let Tony know that I'll be on my way down for some of those cookies?"
[Of course Sergeant Barnes. Shall I also inform him that you have plans to leave for a few days?]
His cheeks went rosy as he smirked, shaking his head. "No, that's alright. I'll.... I'll have to talk to him about that on my own terms. Thank you though. For everything, I mean."
[Anytime, James.]