Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Superheroes don’t get therapy. It’s almost a universal (or multi-universal, Kara supposes) rule that they can’t. It’s not necessarily that they don’t want therapy, but more so that it’s dangerous to. At worst, a crooked therapist could sell out an identity or two. At best, they just wouldn’t be able to understand.

Kara could try going to Kelly, but Kelly is honestly too close to the situation, and Kara would feel uncomfortable going to her about matters that could pertain to Alex, or even sex as an alien. (Like, that’s her soon-to-be sister-in-law. She doesn’t need to hear about how her body is different as an alien!)

Though therapy would be great for moments like this. When Lena is yelling at her for deceiving her, for lying to her. And she’s begging, begging, begging, but Lena is yelling, yelling, yelling, and handing back the watch with malice in her words, when Lena is kicking her out of her office and she has nothing but disdain in her eyes, and Kara knows she deserves it.

After all, no one forced her to lie about her identity. Well, the DEO certainly did. But she’s not fully employed by the DEO.

Semantics.

Whatever the case, she’s at fault, and Kara can at least acknowledge that. It’s the apologizing that’s going to be difficult. Lena has lined her balcony with a small dosage of red sunlight- not enough to take away her powers totally, but enough to keep her from landing on it- and has revoked her access to her office.

Jess is at least on her side, whispering a muffled “fix it” before ushering her out the door. When Kara is confident that Lena can’t see her, she presses the watch into Jess’ hands. There’s fear in Kara’s eyes still, an icy panic that fills her chest.

“I don’t care if she hates me,” she says softly, her heart in her throat, “but I need her to be safe. Please call me.”

Jess nods in understanding. At this point, Kara would tell the whole world if it meant keeping Lena safe. If it meant keeping her loved ones safe.

But oh, oh, it does not stop the ache from settling in her gut when she gets home to her empty apartment, Alex with Kelly and Nia with Brainy, where she was planning a sleepover with Lena, their combined favorite movies settled on the coffee table with Lena’s weird raspberry flavored ice cream stocked in the fridge and her softest NCU sweatshirt folded over the arm of her couch ready for Lena to wear.

And oh, oh, the knowledge that Lena is safe doesn’t stop the tears from coming in the dark of night, with no one there to help her breathe or wipe it away, no perfect game night partner who knows everything about her to be there to hold her face in their hands and whisper that it’ll all be okay, because she alienated the one who could have been her perfect game night partner, and if only, if only…

And Kara is sure she has never felt more broken.

---

It starts slow. The depression, that is. It starts slow, slow enough that no one notices it’s happening. No one notices how Kara starts drinking more, since she sobers up incredibly quickly thanks to the sun. No one notices how she begins sleeping less, laying in bed and staring at the ceiling blankly, since no one is there to sleep over. Alex and Kelly spend more nights together than apart, something Kara is in no way holding grudges onto. Alex deserves nothing but the best, having spent nearly her entire life so far watching after her. Nia and Brainy don’t spend the night, opting to spend time together as a new couple.

And Kara is so, so tired.

But she lies awake, staring blankly at the ceiling.

Sometimes she finds herself missing Black Mercy.

---

Every so often, Kara leaves a letter on Lena’s balcony, letting herself be drained of powers for a minute before leaping off and gaining them in time to fly away.

Dear Lena, the first one reads,

I know I am the last person you want to talk to. I do not begrudge you of this. In fact, I completely understand. I do not wish to make you pity me, but I do wish to explain. One message from you is all it will take to get me to back away forever, to let me know you never want to see me again.

Let me introduce myself correctly, for the first time ever.

My name is Kara Zor-El, and I am the last child of Krypton.

---

Her Earth Birthday comes and goes without much fanfare. She gets the day off from both CatCo and the DEO, and Alex and Kelly drop by for some cake, but the plans she had made with Lena just six months prior clearly aren't going to happen. Not for lack of trying, of course.

Kara had dropped flowers and letters on Lena’s balcony, though the single text Kara got back was enough to force her to stop.

LL: I don’t want to speak to you. I will reach out if I decide I do. Do not leave any more letters.

---

She sees Lena everywhere. Not literally, of course, but she sees her catching lunch with Andrea every Tuesday, and it feels like a sucker punch to the heart and a squeeze to the lungs simultaneously. If Nia notices that she eats lunch at Noonans on those days, she helpfully doesn’t mention it.

She sees Lena out and about with Sam sometimes, and Alex, Kelly, Nia, and Brainy have begun to go to Lena’s every other Thursday for game night with her, and she sees Lena in the way that they all have a bounce in their step on Fridays. She doesn’t blame them. Once, she used to walk like that.

Lena needs them, Kara thinks. She needs them like Kara needs Lena. Wholeheartedly. She deserves having them as friends, and she insists as such when Alex asks if it’s really okay that they’re only doing two game nights a month instead of once a week. Because it is okay, Kara promises.

But she doesn’t promise that it doesn’t hurt, because oh it does. It hurts that Lena won’t reach out to her but will reach out to Alex, who had only ever been distrustful. It hurts that Lena won’t even look at her in the eyes when she’ll have full conversations with Nia on Tuesdays.

It hurts like hell, and sometimes Kara can’t help but wonder if she should disappear.

--- 

Someone tweets at Cat Grant, and it gains traction.

Not that it’s unusual for people to tweet at Cat, looking for her to comment on something since she has left National City; hell, it’s not unusual for those tweets to gain traction. Most of the time, it’s about Supergirl. But this tweet, this tweet is weird. It’s not asking for a comment, but rather commenting for her.

JJ Bixby @bixbixjj

@QueenofAllMedia I think your hero needs some help.

Attached is a link to a YouTube video, nearly five minutes long, of some of Supergirl’s recent saves. But it’s not easy to watch, not for Kara.

Instead of all of the saves, it’s all of the times she almost failed to stop the baddie of the week. She winces when she sees herself leaning into nearly every hit, looking almost relieved as it happens.

She lets herself look at the title of the video, and bites her lip to quiet a gasp. “Supergirl Suicidal?”

---

She hears a heartbeat that she hasn’t heard in several years and tries not to cry when she sees that she has received no message from her. Her or Lena.

But she checks her phone again, and sees that the hashtag “supergirlsuicidal” is trending.

She doesn’t answer any texts from her friends, stifling the disappointment bubbling in her gut when she sees that Lena is not among them. Now, all she feels is blankness. An emptiness.

Her phone rings, and she sees that it is Kelly. If her previous texts let Kara know anything, Kelly is going to urge her to see a therapist.

Kara cannot do that.

But she will do what she can; so she changes into her suit and flies into CatCo, landing on the balcony that was once Cat’s, then Lena’s, and is now Andrea’s.

“Supergirl,” Andrea says in near surprise. It’s the first time Supergirl has stopped at the balcony since learning of Lena’s selling of CatCo. Kara tells herself it’s because Andrea isn’t a journalist she can use to get news out, and it’s true, but neither was Lena.

“Andrea,” she says firmly, but not unkindly.

“Well well, Supergirl finally returns to CatCo,” a new voice joins, and it takes everything in Kara not to whirl around in surprise.

“Ms. Grant,” she says instead. “It is a pleasure to see you again. I must speak to Andrea, I hope you understand.”

Kara almost laughs at the utter surprise in Cat’s face, the older woman’s eyebrows practically becoming her hairline at the dismissal.

She doesn’t want to acknowledge that it’s the first time she has felt giddy in nearly a year.

Cat excuses herself, and Andrea turns to Kara, gesturing at the chair. Kara sits, and looks at the skyline.

“Did you know that I’m older than Superman?” Kara asks softly. It’s something she only told Cat, a detail that never quite made it into the papers, though certainly alluded to. She’s throwing Andrea a bone, letting her know that it isn't Andrea’s fault that Supergirl never visited but rather her own. Andrea makes a choked noise of surprise. “But you’ve said before you have a foster family.”

“And that isn’t a lie,” Kara answers the unspoken question that yes, yes, the world’s most just man could not find it in himself to watch after Kara. “Tomorrow, I need to tell the world something. Can I trust you to set up the announcement?”

“Supergirl, are you pregnant?”

It’s Kara’s turn to make a choked noise, though it comes out as a laugh. “Rao, no, I’m not pregnant. It is serious, though. And I would like you to set up the press conference. CatCo gets an exclusive interview, though I want to be able to select who interviews me.”

“Cat can,” Andrea cuts in. “She can.”

Kara nods decisively. “She can indeed. 4 P.M., tomorrow, for the conference. Ms. Grant gets the interview after.”

---

She watches as the cameras blink on, focusing likely on her face.

“Citizens of National City, it has been a privilege and honor protecting you for the past five years, and I would not give it up for anything. However, things need to change. On Krypton, we had something that I can translate closest to sabbatical in English terms. We would go to temples and pray to our god, Rao, for guidance when we felt lost. And friends, I have felt lost for some time.

“I made mistakes that hurt people I was close to. I lost people. Altogether, I have faced trauma that lays unresolved, though I cannot go to a therapist for it. I need some time to rest and heal myself before I can come back full time. So, for the time being, I am taking that sabbatical. I will still be here to take on alien threats that the rest of my team cannot handle, but I can’t be here 24/7 anymore. I need to heal myself before I can help you heal.

“I would never change my experiences for everything. I hope that, one day, I can come back stronger than ever. Until then, I urge you to be your own heroes. Everyday heroes, ones who help their neighbor bring in groceries or play soccer with the neighborhood children.”

Kara takes a deep breath, wiping away a tear that managed to slip down her face.

“Recently, a video has been going around of my near-defeats. It speculates if I am suicidal. Unfortunately, I would have to say I have been. Seeing the video made me stop and question if I need help. So, JJ Bixby, I have to thank you. Without your video, maybe I would wear myself too thin and pass.

“I am so proud to have been your hero. I am now asking you to be mine, until I can take that mantle again. My family’s crest, the House of El, had a motto. El Mayarah. Stronger together. I believe in you, National City.”

---

She watches her phone light up with texts, though none still from the only person she wanted to have texted. She shakes it off, pocketing the phone and knocking on Cat’s temporary office, until she takes back the reins of CatCo.

“Kiera, an unpleasant surprise,” Cat bites, though with no malice. Instead, her tone is warm, and Kara basks in the familiarity. “I have a meeting with Supergirl soon.”

“I know,” Kara finds herself saying. “And I think you do too.”

---

It’s been three months since Supergirl has left National City, and in that time she has been called out only once to help with an alien attack the DEO couldn’t handle.

With what funds she had from selling paintings, her savings from CatCo, and her allocation of funds from the Fortress, Kara buys herself a house. It’s nothing big, just a quaint little cottage far enough away from the city so she can relax and it doesn’t take as much effort to block out the sounds of the city. It’s also a wreck, and she has to fix it up before she’s comfortable with Alex sleeping over.

She’s begun decorating it for Halloween- there aren’t many neighbors around her, the closest one being a five minute walk, so there isn’t a trick or treating event happening- but she enjoys decorating, and Halloween sometimes makes her feel normal.

She thinks getting herself out of the city was the best thing for her mental health. There’s less screams, and she heard that the firefighters were getting more funding and better training to put out fires.

Good, Kara thinks.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come back to Supergirl?” Alex asks, her mouth full of pizza as she helps string up fake cobwebs.

“Not full time,” she answers. “I like this situation. I haven’t thought about death in over a week now.”

Alex’s eyes crinkle in the way that shows happiness.

Recovery has a sick way of relapsing on you, though, Kara notes, because once the door closes and Alex is gone, she feels empty again. It’s hard to breathe. And she wonders why, until she realizes it is Friday. And that is why Alex was bouncing, rather than walking.

She saw Lena yesterday.

And it marks a year and a half since Kara last spoke to Lena. And oh, oh , does Kara feel the hurt. It begins in her chest, in between her ribcage, and spreads out until it even aches in her legs.

---

Two years after she last spoke to Lena, the house is finally finished. It’s still small, but she has the secret library she always wanted, with a hammock outside and moss as her lawn instead of grass, and she throws a party to celebrate. She even sends an invite to Lena, expecting nothing else but the check on the no to the RSVP.

She lies and says it doesn’t hurt, but Rao it does.

She still has fun. Cat and Carter make it, and, just for a second, Kara feels like everything will be okay when the teenager’s arms wrap around her like no time has passed, and Alex and Kelly announce their engagement. A laugh bubbles out of Kara when Kelly describes how nervous Alex was to get on one knee, and Cat, Alex, and Kelly shoot each other surprised looks.

It’s the first time Kara has laughed in a year.

---

Kelly and Alex take one of the guest rooms, Cat and Carter taking the other, though Kara insists she can clean on her own. It takes only two yawns from Kelly before Alex secedes and lets Kara clean.

It’s therapeutic, Kara insists to Cat, who’s stubborn enough to sit on the couch and track Kara’s movements, though she falls asleep mere minutes later. Kara carries Cat to bed, Carter whispering a faint thank you.

She sits on the now-clean couch, but frowns when she hears a knock. She supposed Nia left something, but when the door swings open, it takes everything in her not to gasp.

“Hello, Kara.”

“Lena.”

Chapter Text

Kara steps to the side to let Lena in.

“Nice place,” Lena says, and Kara hates it. She hates it so much. It’s stilted and awkward, when just over two years ago they’d be warm and hugging, but now, now Kara doesn’t know what to do with her hands so she tugs on her sweater, and she doesn’t know what to say so she stays silent. “I- this was a mistake.”

Lena whirls to leave but Kara reaches out, reaches out on a whim, grabbing Lena’s wrist, but Lena wrenches it away, and Kara falls back like she was burned, and Kara hates it so, so much. It’s cold and icy, compared to the warmth that Lena used to exude around her.

She watches Lena walk out the door, and falls to the ground, crying once again. And it’s on the floor where Cat finds her, curled up and still crying nearly an hour later.

---

Kara isn’t sure how, but she wakes up in bed with a pounding headache, from how much she cried last night. She rolls over, seeing water on her nightstand, and gulps it down, feeling the headache abate. But she doesn’t leave her room just yet, even though she can hear Alex and Kelly in the kitchen making food, Cat and Carter watching TV in her living room. Instead she stares at the bookshelf in her room, staring at the photos she has placed on it, and hurts.

Lena, smiling with Kara.

Lena, smiling with Kelly and Alex.

Lena, smiling with Nia and Brainy.

Lena.

---

Cat doesn’t tell Alex about Kara’s late-night breakdown, something she is infinitely grateful for, but she does call Kara into her office first thing.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m hurting,” is all Kara says, and Cat nods in understanding. Kara sees Cat reach out subtly, patting Kara’s hand, and she nods before fleeing the office, hiding away in hers, her office with the new shiny “Editor-in-Chief” plaque on the door. She wanted to celebrate with Lena, but she did what she promised and didn’t leave any more letters on her balcony.

---

She’s begun to teach herself how to cook. Easy, simple meals, at first. Pancakes and crockpot chili. Recipes with few ways to mess up. She’s graduated to somewhat easy but a little more complicated recipes like homemade pasta and pizza, recipes that are easier to mess up but still not terribly complicated.

And she’s eating that homemade pasta when a watch goes off.

She’s at L-Corp faster than anyone expects, and it’s only because of that does she manage to save Lena. It’s only because of that does she manage to grab Lena’s wrist just in time to cushion a fall. She hears the crack of Lena’s arm, but can’t find it in herself to care when Lena is safe.

She returns to Lena’s office to take care of whoever is in it, but finds herself face to face with three men weilding Kryptonite.

But Lena’s safe, and that’s what matters.

So Kara rushes the men, rushes them despite the glowing green rock making her nauseous, the green creeping into her veins and spreading, and she manages to knock two of them out and is working on the third, but Jess is at the door, innocent Jess who called Kara, and the third man turns to shoot Jess but Kara can’t let that happen so she pushes Jess, pushes her out of the way and collapses because he shot her with Kryptonite around, collapsing and her vision is blurring but she can see Jess knock the last man out, and she smiles, safe in the knowledge that Lena and Jess are okay, even as the bullet embeds itself in her abdomen, even as she passes out.

---

She wakes up in the DEO, vision still blurry, the sound of heart monitors beeping around her, both of her hands being held.

“‘Lex?”

“Kara, you’re okay.” Alex presses a kiss against Kara’s hairline.

“‘S Len’ okay?”

“Lena’s safe. Broken wrist, but otherwise no injuries. You did good, kid.”

“An’ Jess?”

“Jess is also okay.” Alex brushes hair off of Kara’s face. “You can sleep again, we’ll be here.”

And she does.

---

When she wakes up this time, she feels much better, more clear headed. She looks around the room and sees Kelly, Alex, and Cat talking in hushed whispers, the noise stopping suddenly when Kelly notices that Kara is awake.

“How are you doing?” Kelly fusses over Kara. “You were very brave.”

“‘M okay,” she mumbles, “How is Lena?”

“Lena’s okay.”

“Need to see her.”

“Kara…” Alex sits on the other side of the Kryptonian, glancing at Kelly over Kara’s body. “Are you sure?”

“Need to,” Kara insists. “Please.”

“Okay, okay,” Alex concedes, and sighs softly. “Stubborn Kryptonian.”

Kara tracks her family leaving out of the corner of her eye, and slumps against the bed, whimpering in pain, stifling it in time to see Lena, one arm wrapped in a black cast, hesitate in the doorway.

“Lena,” Kara breathes out, so grateful she’s okay. “I got there as fast as I could, ‘m so sorry.”

Kara grunts when Lena flings herself on her, but relaxes as soon as she settles, the feeling of home settling over her. She simply breathes and holds Lena closer, safe, safe in the knowledge that Lena is okay, safe in the knowledge she is in her arms, and she lets herself drift off to sleep.

---

This time, when Kara wakes, it isn’t slow. It’s abrupt, but without the panic Kara is used to after a near-death encounter. She’s still disoriented, but there’s no panic, and she doesn’t understand why until she registers a comfortable weight on top of her.

Lena.

Kara lets herself simply watch the brunette, wanting to drink in every feature of the woman she wasn’t allowed to talk to for two years. From the freckle on her neck to her eyebrows furrowed even in sleep, Kara takes in every detail. She tries not to wince when Lena begins stirring on top of her.

“Hey,” Kara says, voice still gravely from not using it.

“Kara,” Lena fusses over Kara again, clearly still sleepy, but Kara can’t help but think she’s the most beautiful woman alive.

“I’m okay,” Kara insists. “How… how are you?”

She’s hesitant, unsure of if she’s allowed to ask, if Lena is okay with her asking, if she’s allowed to look Lena in the eyes and speak to her, because she betrayed Lena’s trust, broke her trust, but still, still, Kara has to know how Lena is doing, so she has to ask.

“I… I’m sorry,” is all that Lena says in response to Kara’s question, avoiding eye contact.

“I think we should talk,” Kara says, pressing the button to make the chair sit up, and promising “No more secrets.

“I’m sorry. I should have told you of my identity before I did. Before your brother could.”

“I’m still hurt by that,” Lena says softly, “but I understand why. I didn’t, not until recently, when I saw you get hurt… but I do now. You were trying to protect me from seeing you hurt.”

“And I didn’t want people to come after you any more than they did,” Kara adds. “And…”

“And?” Lena prompts.

“And I was selfish,” Kara continues, and this time it’s her, it’s her avoiding eye contact, and it feels wrong, it feels wrong because her heart is hammering in her chest and she’s nervous to explain everything, but no matter what, no matter what she has to get this out before it bubbles over and explodes out of her chest. “Everything changes when I tell people. They treat me differently, like I’m unbreakable. I…

“When I told Winn, he stopped asking me about how I was doing, but rather what saves I had made. I never got to tell James, because Kal-El told him before I could. When Cat found out, she threatened to fire me until I could prove I wasn’t Supergirl. I just wanted one friend who wouldn’t look at me differently.” Kara takes a deep breath, blinking hard to get rid of the tears building up in her eyes but it doesn’t work, no, instead it begins the overflow of tears and soon, soon she’s sobbing onto Lena’s shoulder, shivering when she feels Lena’s fingers comb through her hair.

“Take your time, darling,” Lena whispers, and it only sends Kara into harder tears, because she missed being called darling. Lena’s fingers don’t stop combing through blonde hair, and soon Kara’s sobs decrease into occasional sniffles, until finally Kara can sit up.

“I liked feeling human with you,” Kara continues softly. “It was like I was normal, for one minute in time. I didn’t worry about how I looked, because I could just be me. You liked me being me. You wanted to be around me even when I devoured an entire pizza, or didn’t understand some references, or anything. And then you started hating Supergirl, and I thought that if I kept them separate I could still have you in my life.

“But then your relationship with me got worse, but better with Supergirl, and I… I wanted you in my life somehow,” Kara bites her lip before continuing, “and I was selfish. I was selfish because you were the first person to really want me.”

“What do you mean? What about the Danvers?” Lena asks, confusion incredibly evident in her tone.

“Did you know that I’m older than Superman?” Kara echoes her earlier words from Andrea, and Lena startles.

“But-”

“But he’s been around for much longer,” Kara answers before Lena can even finish her question, and she stifles another sob. “I was trapped in a place where time doesn’t exist within the boundaries, but continues on the outside, so when I arrived to Earth, he was already grown.

“I was supposed to take care of him, I was supposed to raise him,” Kara sobs again, tucking herself into the crook of Lena’s neck, revelling in the familiar comfort of the action. “But he couldn’t raise me, a 13 year old, arguably easier than a baby.

“If… if even Superman couldn’t love me, who could?”

---

Kara cries herself to sleep, and Lena makes sure that Kara is settled comfortably before collecting the other women.

“I’m going to kill Superman,” Lena says abruptly, after a few minutes of silence. “That self-righteous, holier-than-thou dickhead.”

Kelly devolves into laughter at the woman’s use of swearing.

“You and me both,” Alex responds. “But, I wouldn’t recommend it. Don’t want the world to see you go all Luthor.”

A few years ago that comment would have stung, but from the mouth of one of her best friends, it doesn’t, not anymore.

“Do you know what Kara said to me?” Lena asks, not letting anyone answer before continuing, “if even Superman couldn’t love me, who could?”

And when Kara wakes again, she’s surrounded by people she loves. Lena helps her settle comfortably, and then presses a quick kiss to her forehead, everyone telling her how much they love her.

---

Their friendship is hesitant, still, but Kara notices that it’s better. Lena initiates hugs now, visiting her home in the middle of nowhere, grinning when Kara lights a bonfire with her eyes before everyone is set to come visit, and it’s easier. Easier now that she can talk about home, Krypton, and easier now that she doesn’t have to hide her powers, easier now that she gets to talk science with Lena.

Easier now that she’s begun healing that last bit of cracked heart that wouldn’t have been able to heal without Lena.

So. Hesitant, but easier. And that’s something Kara can live with.

“You feel like home,” Kara says randomly, smiling when Lena drops the bag of flour in the kitchen where they’re making cookies before the bonfire and gets white coated in her eyebrows, laughing when she rushes to the bathroom to wipe it off. When Lena returns, it’s with a quirk in her eyebrow, and so Kara explains. “You’ve always felt like home. It’s… well, you know I’m from Krypton, but you still don’t make me feel like I have to be unbreakable all the time. I can tell you that I feel sad and you don’t tell me that I can’t have bad days.”

“Darling, I only do what you do for me,” Lena smiles wide. “I don’t have to be the cold CEO around you.”

“No, you don’t,” Kara responds in kind, a grin taking center stage, warmth blooming from her chest, not caused by the fire.

---

Lena takes her time exploring every nook and cranny of Kara’s house while the cookies bake, gasping in delight when Kara shows her the secret library. She takes her time there, thumbing through a few books, but stopping abruptly when she sees the corner.

Lena’s corner.

It was something Kara did in attempts to heal herself without Lena, textbooks that she had helped write for college kids spanning the shelf, journals published by her sitting atop of it. Interviews Kara did with her, photoshoots done by James and other photographers.

Wise? Probably not. But she did it anyway, and it gave her a sense of security.

“You… you kept up with me?”

“I did,” Kara says softly. “Always your biggest supporter.”

Lena continues looking at the corner, gasping when she sees a pile of academic journals she had mentioned in passing to Kara that she read.

“You…”

“I subscribed to them for you,” Kara answers, intent on keeping her promise of no more secrets. “I had always hoped we could become friends again.”

She ignores the sour note on her tongue when she says friends, so incredibly aware that she wants more than just friends with Lena, but friends is better than nothing, and she can’t risk Lena pulling away again.

“Oh darling,” Lena says wetly, tears already on her face, and Kara, Kara can’t resist the urge to wipe them away, and Lena’s hand catches her own, holding it in place so that Kara is cupping Lena’s face. And Lena’s face burns her palm but it hurts so good, and she can’t pull away, not now, not ever, and she feels the overwhelming sense of home again.

And she’s leaning in, and Lena is leaning in, and-

beepbeepbeepbeepbeep

And Lena startles, pulling away, and Kara blushes, and they both hurry to pull the cookies out of the oven.

---

Everyone is huddled around the bonfire, Lena pressed entirely to Kara’s side, and Kara is drinking some of the alien alcohol and her face is warm, and she’s happy.

And that thought almost makes her cry.

---

Lena stays the night, of course, but so does Cat and Carter and Alex and Kelly, in the guest rooms now deigned as theirs, so Lena sleeps in Kara’s.

And so does Kara.

And if Kara wakes up in the middle of the night to find herself spooning Lena, both of them in the center of their bed, and just closes her eyes again? Well, that would be no one’s business but their own.

---

Lena is making pancakes in the kitchen when Kara wakes up from her sleep, smiling when she smells chocolate chips.

She’s in the kitchen quickly, sitting on the barstool, grinning at the brunette, surrounded by her family.

Until there’s a scream. It’s a kid, loud and terrified, and Kara is out of the door in a blur of red and blue.

Children in danger would always be her weakness.

Kara finds the child trapped, under a dead tree that must have fallen in just the right time to crack his leg. He’s crying, and Kara recognizes him as one of her neighbor’s children, no older than eight.

“Hey, hey, what’s your name buddy?” Kara already knows that it’s Danny, but she wants him to settle.

“D-danny.”

“Okay Danny,” Kara responds softly. “I’m gonna get you out of here, and everything is going to be okay.”

---

She visits Danny in the hospital, but returns to her home quickly where Cat is waiting to interview her. It’s basic questions, like if she plans on returning to superheroing (not sure yet), why she did it (because she heard a scream that she couldn’t ignore), and any comments (no, no more comments).

Cat, Carter, Kelly, and Alex leave, but Lena stays.

Lena stays.

---

Lena fusses over Kara, fussing over how she’s doing and feeling until Kara takes Lena’s hand, once wandering over her face to check for any scrapes or bruises.

“I’m okay, really.”

And Kara looks Lena in the eyes, letting go of her hand to cup Lena’s face.

“Promise?”

“I promise,” Kara responds, revelling in the heat from Lena’s face, revelling in the comfort washing over her from Lena’s worrying because it means Lena cares, and she’s smiling.

“Why are you smiling?” Lena asks softly, and Kara feels the answer bubbling through her throat and out her lips and she has to tell Lena, she has to.

“Because I’m in love with you,” she blurts out.

And Lena doesn’t say anything, but leans in.

And Kara feels nothing but home when she’s kissing Lena.