Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The boys were filming their final postmortem video, on the revisit of the Sallie house, and nearing the end, decided to watch some compilations the fans of the show had put together to find out which clip was their favorite.

“Hmm, this one looks promising”, Ryan stopped scrolling on his phone and looked at the camera, then at his co-host, before wheezing. “‘Shane Madej being a demon for (nearly) 15 minutes’”.

“Oh so because I’m not afraid of some ‘wind’, I’m certainly one of the creatures we’re hunting, that makes perfect sense”, Shane replied with his signature shit-eating grin plastered on his face.

“I’m still watching it just to see if the fans are right.”

“Ry, you don’t actually believe this right?”, the taller man laughed,”That’s ridiculous. But still, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to watch it, I can’t wait to disprove the carefully dissected ‘evidence’”, he added with air quotes.

His friend let out a small chuckle and pressed play, and moved his chair closer to the ‘demon’. As the clips rolled, laughs were had, they had an all around good time remembering and savouring the memories ingrained in those moments caught on tape. Maybe once or twice Ryan would look away from video Shane to real Shane, concerned at what the former had said. Shane, on the other hand, seemed oblivious to his friend’s silent worries, and was wheezing at his own jokes a bit too hard. Ryan eventually dismissed this fact, seeing as Shane was usually quite strange, so this was probably normal. Until minute 14. Ryan distinctly saw him stiffen in his peripheral vision. The shorter man of the duo raised an eyebrow, but didn’t ask anything, waiting for the video to finish. When it did, he turned his attention to Shane, and asked half-mockingly:

“So, it seems that your secret has been exposed, huh?”

He could’ve sworn his taller friend had tensed, but the next second he was back to his annoying self. Ryan must’ve imagined it. He didn’t quite focus on what Shane was telling the camera, as it was probably just some bullshit explanation with sole foundation dumb jokes that only he himself could laugh genuinely at. Ryan sighed, knowing that this guy will end up killing him with his stupid jokes. In the moment, he decided to get even by making even worse quips:

“Yeah yeah, tell that pesky camera whatever you like, it’s just you and me here, I wanted to end this journey in the office I started it in, but I’ll have you know,” to which he turned to Shane with a determined expression, as if he were serious, “But I know that they’re right, that you’ve been disguising your identity this whole time.”

Ryan was contemplating wheezing, but that would ruin the effect of surprise, so he held it in. He almost felt like he was channeling his inner Ricky Goldsworth, one of his favorite bits of the show, since the uncertainty of it scared his friend a bit. So he waited for Shane to retort another idiotic comment about a demon working at Buzzfeed and they’ll laugh in sync before moving on.

…that didn’t happen. Instead, the taller man had a mixture of confusion and shock on his face, something unusual for him to be sporting. He glanced back at the cameras recording, and ever so slightly jerked his head to the side. The lights overhead flickered, before returning to normal. Ryan looked back at the video equipment, only to see it was thrown on the floor, the red dot now off, signaling that they weren’t recorded anymore. Ryan froze, his mind immediately going to the supernatural energy that could be at play. He took a breath to steady himself, and thought of a logical explanation, now thinking that Shane wanted to scare him, by using his own tricks against him. He turned his head back at his co-host, and asked, voice slightly quivering:

“Uh holy shit, was tha-that an earthquake?”

Shane didn’t answer. He kept staring at Ryan, the expression on his face neutral. He, too, was looking at the other. Then, as if this were a more delicate matter than a surgical operation, moved a little closer to Ryan.

“Who told you?” he asked, keeping his voice lower than his fake australian accent from that one episode.

“I-wha?” Ryan stammered, thinking that Shane wouldn’t have gone this far with a prank. But this was Shane he was dealing with, you couldn’t be sure of anything he would and wouldn’t do, unless pentagrams and ghosts were involved.

“Who. told. you,” he repeated, getting more anxious with every word.

“Is this some sort of weird joke? I think it’s been going on long enough, you can stop now,” the shorter man pleaded, trying to dominate his fear, not wanting to be made fun of yet again.

“Oh I’m serious. I never thought you suspected, considering you never seemed scared of me before. So either something told you, or you finally pieced it together. And while I value your intelligence, I don’t think you would’ve discovered it all by yourself.”

“Oookay, that’s terrifying, can we cut the theatrics now? Can you tell me how you orchestrated this entire..whatever this is? You couldn’t have done it all by yourself, so who helped you? Was it Brent? Should’ve known he’d prank me for the season finale.”

“Ryan, there is no prank. Tell me how you figured it out. Was it on location? The cameras aren’t rolling now, it’s just you, and me. If you don’t tell me, I’ll just fish it out myself. It’s quite painful, I don’t want to hurt you.”

Ryan was reaaally not liking this jest anymore. He didn’t even know whether it was real or not. Wait, was his best friend actually admitting to be a demon? No way, he’s always been so skeptical, if he knew it was real, he wouldn’t have laughed at the supernatural so much. Unless…

He was the scariest thing in the investigations. Ryan’s palms started sweating. Of course he’d taunt the spirits, invited them to rip his heart out for crying out loud, but if they were real, and they didn’t do anything…

Ryan felt a panic attack coming up. ‘He’s my friend,’ he tried to reassure himself, ‘He could’ve killed me all this time if he could, but he didn’t and-’

Shane moved his chair closer, reaching out his arm to touch Ryan. He yelped as he snapped back from thought, resisting the urge to scream.

The lanky (demon?) sighed, and reached out even further before stopping. His finger touched his friend’s forehead, who, too stunned to speak, sat there breathing heavily.

There was a shock through the contact, and Ryan felt something non physical slowly being pulled from his brain. He looked back from the finger disrespecting his boundaries, and saw Shane watching a spot above his head intensely, like he was searching for something. But the sight looked wrong.

Shane's eyes were black, a complete void of darkness. He seemed dissatisfied with his search. He backed away from his friend, only to invade his space again by holding his head, forcing him to lock eyes. Ryan knew it wasn’t a prank anymore. Either there was something possessing his co host, or he’s always been a supernatural creature. The latter frightened him less, seeing as he was sure *that* one wasn’t going to kill him. He tried to get out of the embrace, but he was held too tightly, only for Shane(?) to ask, looking almost betrayed:

“So, who did you seek out? I can’t find the memory where you discovered my secret, so which priest did you ask?”

“Ask what?” Ryan replied, quite confused as to why this whole situation felt less terrifying than sympathetic.

“Stop joking around, there’s no way you could have suppressed them so good that I, the fucking duke of the seventh circle of Hell can’t find them!”

Both men were staring at each other, in silence. The demon was mad, but the human could sense no animosity in his actions. He was simply pissed off he didn’t understand. The human, on the other hand, felt a mixture of relief and fear. His friend wasn’t actually possessed, he’d always been a demon, but he was powerful if he was actually who he claimed to be. Ryan felt a shiver on his back as he realized that this was proof demons were actually real. Shane pulled away, realizing he was scaring his friend. “Hey, I meant to tell you, but I didn’t know how I’d get around to it, nor how you’d react. You’re not as scared as I thought you would be in this situation though, so I guess that’s better?”

“So demons are real, Hell is real, -Holy shit I wanted proof but not like this-, wait does this mean ghosts are actually real too??” Ryan was going to have a breakdown, he knew it was coming, but he needed to know the answer to that pressing question.

“Nah,” Shane responed, scrunching up his nose as if the question was a mockery, “Those are only very weak demons trying to manipulate the living.”

“Wait, did we ever catch-”

“We did catch like three, but I ended up scaring them off before I even realized they were there. Like that full-body apparition you caught on camera in the Old city jail. But other than those, the biggest threat in all those places was me.”

“So you lied to me. Saying that you don’t believe in the paranormal, even though you are the fucking paranormal!”

“I never did lie to you. I said I was demon proof, and I am. I said explicitly multiple times things regarding my life in hell, and you didn’t bat an eye.” Ryan's eyes widened as he remembered all the strange comments Shane would say that he used to think were bits for the show. “Oh shit you did.” That was the last thing he did that day, as his nerves couldn’t take it anymore. He blacked out.

Chapter Text

“Ryan? Ryan, can you hear me?”

His eyes suddenly opened as the voice finally reached his ears. He was laying on a couch, in a place he didn’t recognize at first, so he nearly jumped back 30 feet, but another man prevented him from doing so. “Ryan, you good buddy? I get that it was surprising, but you’re starting to scare me,” Shane laughed. Ryan felt his mind swimming again as he remembered the incident. His breath was catching in his throat, and his heart nearly fell to the pit of his stomach as he noticed his friend’s eyes were colourless again. Not only that, but he had horns decorating the sides of his head, as well as sharp fangs. “So it is actually true,” the shorter man said, shaking his head, “I thought I was dreaming.”

“Nah, your dreams don’t have that logic in them,” the demon responded, liking something red off his claw tips. Ryan shuddered, then tensed:

“Wait, how do you know what I dream about?”

“Mhm, popped in a couple times after some investigations to see how you were doing, some demons like to feed off of that fear by creating nightmares, but they seemed so ridiculous I knew you’d be fine.”

“You, a demon, were concerned about me?” Ryan asked incredulously.

“Yeah, we’re not all bad, disgusting and vile creatures set on eating the souls of the unborn or whatever it is you mortals believe nowadays. Those are prejudices, and they hurt,” Shane retorted.

“What? Is it bad for business?” Ryan wheezed.

“Well yeah, of course it is!” The taller man nearly screamed, “Do you have any idea how many people, once they saw me exit their crudely made pentagram, screamed and ran away in fear??? The nerve of some humans. They summon ME, then act as if I came unprompted. But if it’s not that, then some cultists ask me to kill their enemies in the weirdest way possible. I'M NOT A DAMN HITMAN, DO YOUR OWN DIRTY WORK!”

He was fuming. Ryan could swear his skin was becoming a dark crimson, but the anger subsided just as quickly as it arose. Shane turned back to face him, a little embarrassed by his sudden outburst.

Ryan shifted on the couch, pensive: “Wait, so you’ve never killed anyone?”

“I’m not a monster, Ryan, there’s no reason I’d do that.”

“But then what were you eating off of your hands earlier huh?”

“Paint.”

“What?”

“You heard me. Paint. It’s delicious, really, don’t quite get why you humans decide to decorate your walls with it.”

“Now that I think about it, this is probably the least surprising thing you’ve ever told me.”

Shane chuckled as he reached for the mug on the table. His friend sat awkwardly, figuring out what other questions he could ask without being rude. That’s when he noticed the arrow-tipped tail on Shane, and couldn’t help himself:

“For someone who takes a very strange approach when hunting ghosts, you sure look more stereotypical than Father Thomas’s church decorations.”

Shane snorted, turned around and winked at Ryan:

“Well, you have me to thank for that, as I’m the only demon who left witnesses alive to my appearance, so now everyone thinks all demons look like me. It’s quite flattering, so I guess it isn’t totally a disappointment.”

“How old even are you?”

The entity stopped, then frowned. “I don’t remember. I’ve been around so long, I kinda forgot. Got lost in the moment, as your kind says. If I had to guess, about two thousand to two thousand five hundred.”

“WHAT?? Jesus you’re old!” Ryan exclaimed, nearly shattering Shane’s eardrums.

“Hey, you asked! If you don’t like my answers, or simply want to ridicule me, I’ll ignore you.”

A short silence fell across the room as both were expecting the other to say something. The shorter man sighed, but took this as his cue to investigate more about Shane.

“Sooo, you know some of the big guns?”

“Ry, I AM one of the big guns.”

“Well, Shane doesn’t really sound like a demon name, so..” his friend trailed off, smirking.

“Because that’s not my real name. And no, before you ask, I’m not telling you the actual one, you’ll just use it to summon me if you think about it.”

“Alright, if that’s how you want it, but,” Ryan added, holding up a finger, a gesture that lets Shane know his friend already has a strange conspiracy forming in his mind, “what do the others think about you being represented as them?”

“The head honchos? Oh, they’re furious. Not that they can do anything about it, they absolutely hate having to talk to people, and some are really shy, so they’re just
always fuming downstairs.”

“So is Hell an actual thing?”

“Yeah, but it’s not exactly what you think it is. There’s no fire, for one, more like an empty void that looks very much like your world, but something feels ‘off’, if you get what I mean. Any human that ends up there sees what they want to see, so to speak. So, technically, everyone is right about what comes after death. All demons can shapeshift, to various degrees, and the higher ‘level’ you are, the more diverse your options are.”

“So, can you turn into me, for example?”

“Ryan, sometimes I wonder how you haven’t been killed yet. Not only are you walking willingly into the trap, you’re also building it yourself”, the taller man laughed.

Ryan laughed along, thinking it was funny, closing his eyes for a mere second. When he opened them, he saw a copy of himself grinning back. The real Ryan stumbled off of the couch, heart racing, while the faker slapped his knee in ecstasy. ‘Ohhh fuck even his laugh is the same as mine’ the original thought. The fake one slowly morphed back into Shane, much to Ryan’s relief. He was still laughing, which was kinda mocking. “Okay, you’ve had your fun, but I still have more to ask”, the shorter man said begrudgingly, stretching out his hand for the other to help him up. The one in question never did, leaving him laying there like an idiot. Ryan sighed, pulling back his hand as he stood back up himself. “But if you can do that, can’t you turn into like, I don’t know, Satan’s true form to set the record straight? He is your boss right?”

Shane sat down crossed legged on the couch. “Oh, you mean ol’ Luci? Yeah, I’ve done that, couple of times actually, and I’ve also tried everyone from Beez to Mephis, but it didn’t quite work out. Ya know cryptids right?”

The human was already snickering. “Don’t tell me you-y”

“Oh you snake! I had forgotten about your little jokes about me being part of Bigfoot’s family! But yes, that was me. Don’t laugh, do you know how hard it was to be inconspicuous enough yet direct in order to make it seem like an accidental reveal?? And mothman and the others as well, and what does everyone do?? They create a whole new category of creatures just because they couldn’t grasp the concept of diversity. What a bunch of idiots. Some were drunk too, and no one believed them!”

“You have to admit that is pretty funny.”

Shane shrugged. “I guess.”

“I know I’m going to regret this, but what else can you do?” Ryan rubbed the back of his neck, “Like, demon magic and whatnot.”

Shane’s lips curled into a wide smile, a mischievous grin way too stretched out considering the dimensions of his face. “What can I do? You should be more specific with your questions, otherwise we’ll be here all night.”

“Wait, what time is it right now??” Ryan asked, scared that they’d be late to work, looking at his wristwatch. “Oh. It’s just 9:45 pm,” he sighed. But before he could look away, the clock hands spun backwards, leaving the time to be 21:37. Ryan squinted at the device, not understanding whether it was broken or not. He looked back up at his friend, who was suddenly very interested in the architecture of his own home.

“I know you just did that, and I’m very concerned that you’re going to destroy the world one day.”

“Hah? No, I was just thinking about fixing this dent on my wall, wood doesn’t look good chipped. Either way, it’s too much of a hassle to turn back time too much, it’d cause unwanted attention as well as throw your planet too much off its axle. I don’t want to destroy this world, it’s fun, and I also doubt I could change the time to more than 10 minutes. It’s just not within my scope of capabilities.”

“Alright, good to know you’re not a marvel villain, but I want to know one last thing before going back to my apartment for the night.”

“Only one? If you want to sleep well, you’re gonna have to question me more.”

Ryan snapped his fingers. “My point exactly. I’m going to try to process all this, and if I have too much information, I’m not going to be able to make sense of any of it. Buuut, if I have only a couple answers, I can log into google to avoid asking redundant things, and gain a couple other explanations.”

“Ry, we’ve been over this, humans are literally the worst at compiling information on the supernatural,” Shane threw his hands up in exasperation.

“But they did get your appearance right, so they must have some truth.”

“If it makes you feel better, and you promise me not to spend the entire night researching and get some fucking sleep, I’ll let you leave. Now, tell me what’s this so-very important information you seek.”

“What do you do in Hell? We’ve already established you don’t kill, and you don’t seem like the type to steal souls or make contracts, so what do you do?”

Shane seemed taken aback. “What I do in Hell?” He blinked, then relaxed. “Well, it might not be okay with your morals, but I torture souls. I know it-”

“YOU WHAT?? Oh, sorry, forgot you were sensitive to loud noises,” Ryan’s bewilderment subsided as he realized he should listen to the entire explanation. Shane just rolled his fully black eyes and crossed his arms, continuing his sentence as if nothing happened:

“-sounds bad, but it’s not what you think it is. I’m in charge of the worst tormentor souls, those that, during their lifetime, made someone else’s life, well, hell. I make imaginary scenarios for them in which they are the victim, until I deem them worthy to move on. Every demon has specific bad souls to torture, but only to make them realize what they did during their lifetime. Some need more torture than others, and some don’t ever get out of our shackles. I don’t have a lot to do down there, considering that tormentors aren’t the most evil types of people, and so there aren’t a lot that even get to me, and if they do, they usually understand very quickly, as they’re usually throwing out their frustrations on others. Sometimes I get a really evil person, and man do I enjoy every second of putting them in their place,” the demon’s fust clenched, claws tearing his skin, as if he was remembering a specific memory.

As much as that man was lanky, Ryan realized he did not want to have Shane as his enemy. Partly because he was a demon, but also because he looked loathful right then. The shorter man walked towards his friend, and patted his shoulder. He felt him relax immediately, and as such, Ryan decided this was the time to leave, before he’d faint again or something. “So, this was..fun? Learning my best friend is a demon sure hits different, but it’s not a bad experience. I do have more to pester you about, but as we discussed, not today.”

“Are we still going to do ghost files? Since now you can know basically everything about the paranormal?” There was a little crack in Shane’s voice, he really enjoyed the little escapades.

“Do you want to keep doing it?”

“Of course I do! Some of the places aren’t really good-looking, but I really like the trips and going there with you and everyone!”

“Then we’re still doing it. I would never stop the show, it’s like my own child. I’d never abandon it, but if you didn’t want to do it, I would, for your sake.”

“Awh Ryan, that’s really sweet. I don’t think I’ve ever met a human so kind as you, especially to me, an otherworldly creature.”

“Okay let’s cut it out with the weird sappy talk, I’m leaving, see you tomorrow,” Ryan made a hand gesture and walked out of the living room into the kitchen.

Shane made a childish imitation of a phone. “If you ever need a special lift, call me.”

Ryan stopped in his tracks, turned around and raised an eyebrow. He asked, half-jokingly, half-inquisitively.

Shane simply winked at him, and before he knew it, Ryan found himself outside in the driveway, forming the call number for a taxi. He smiled, muttering to himself. He really should’ve kept his mouth shut.

Chapter Text

“So you’re telling me, the literal spawn of Satan, that you want us to go get blessed by a pastor? Ryan, sometimes I think you want to murder me,” Shane said, laughing awkwardly.

“And what if I am?” Ryan quirked an eyebrow, folding one leg over the other.

His friend tensing was enough for him to drop the facade, and snicker. Shane slapped his own foot, disappointed he actually fell for it. This was Ryan, his best friend, of course he wouldn’t betray him. He’d already had the chance to do so, and he didn’t. Once the silence fell back again, the demon thought it was time to inquire more:

“Why do we need to go there before the ‘haunted’ house anyway? Do you truly think he’s going to help us? Well, help you, more than me, if I set foot in there I’m gonna have a terrible headache at best, and close to food poisoning at worst,” he rolled his eyes, cringing at the memories.

A small scream exited the human’s mouth, which he immediately covered. His eyes lit up the way they do when he finally pieces the mystery together and thinks he solved it. Shane found his lips curling in a smile, but it faded just as quickly, as he knew his friend was not going to leave him alone about the information he just gave. “The hotdogs! I knew there was something fishy about how you said you got sick from them! Of course, every single time we’ve entered churches, you’ve always acted weird afterwards!” He stared at his supernatural companion in awe.

“Yeah, can we just get to the point? I don’t wanna be in there longer than necessary, and if you want to be blessed before an investigation, that makes me afraid for your mental state, I don’t want you to hyperventilate to death because of a ghost or worse, wind.”

Ryan snarled. “Okay, rude, but I have a good reason for this idea. The place we’re going to is filled to the brim with sightings, as well as is rumoured to be a portal to hell, and I want every precaution to not have my soul taken away from my body.”

Shane narrowed his eyes. “Uh, dude, you have me, I’m demon-proof, I can protect you, as I’ve always done, you don’t need whatever bullshit a guy in a suit is gonna give you.”

“You didn’t even let me finish. I don’t want to not encounter the creatures, that’s why I’m going to get a blessing. You keep saying that in every place we’ve been that was haunted, you took care of the intruder. But I have never seen one up close-”

“You saw a tube of toothpaste fall off a sink on a boat once,” the demon interrupted.

“That doesn’t count, I still don’t know whether it was a sighting or not with your stupid quips. Anyway, I decided to find out for myself how these guys are,” he leaned in closer in his chair, “I’m gonna put myself out there as bait, wait to attract one, then call you to banish them.”

Shane froze, hands behind his head. Even after all these centuries, humans still surprised him with their
courage. After a minute, he nodded slowly. Ryan deserved to see the dragging to the underworld in action, he’d been so understanding of the whole situation, it would be a stupid mistake to not let him have a bit of fun. “So when do we leave? Not that I’m excited to see you scream your head off, but y’know.”

“Tomorrow afternoon, I’ve already bought the tickets this morning,” Ryan deadpanned.

“Hm. Fine by me, if you truly want to do this. But if you change your mind there, I’ll let you be, however,” a devilish smirk appeared on his face, “I won’t forget it.”

They both got up from their seats in the empty meeting room, and shook hands before walking outside to pack their stuff.

***

Shane plopped down in the passenger seat while Ryan sat behind the wheel. He turned on the car’s radio for some background noise. Even though he hadn’t entered the church, he still felt a bit nauseous. All that holy energy really drained him while he had waited for Ryan outside.

As the songs went on during the ride, Shane became increasingly annoyed, as they were quite awful and a menace to his eardrums. He looked at his friend, giving him questioning looks as to how he supported the noises, which Ryan didn’t notice, too focused on the road. Static echoed in the vehicle while the stations changed rapidly without anything touching the buttons, until Yes! We have no bananas started playing. This was enough for Ryan to turn his head to see Shane finally relaxing. He scoffed:

“You can’t just do that y’know, that’s rude.”

“Those from before were hurting my ears, and downright torturing me! Who knew Justin Beiber and Nicki Minaj could be as efficient as disembowelment!” Shane retorted.

“Oh come on, they’re not that bad! Your music taste is just stuck in 1920 something,” Ryan snapped back, shifting his eyes from his friend back to the ongoing traffic.

“1923, actually,” the demon corrected, articulating every syllable. “Major hit even, really helped with the mood of most Americans during that time period. That’s when my summonings started going down in numbers, so I’m quite grateful for this song.”

“Are we really about to have an argument over fucking music before going in an abandoned home?”

Shane got that mischievous look on his face that only meant an agreement. Ryan groaned, knowing what he’s getting himself into, and thought that maybe he could sacrifice a few minutes of aimless sitting, going 2km per hour in a crowded highway:

“How did you even find a station that plays this song anyway? This sounds ancient, I can’t fathom anyone else listening to this.”

“It isn’t a station, I searched through most that were available, found none that I enjoyed, so I just played the song myself.”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “I shouldn’t be surprised. Alright, you don’t like the pop or hip-hop nowadays, but what do you want to try to listen to?”

“You mean there’s more types of music?”

“Jesus man, where have you been all these years?? Have you slept for a couple hundred years in a cave or something?”

“Okay one: ouch, two: I did snooze during the second world war since it got kinda depressing and woke up 40 years later, but I also tried to lay low, since people got back into satanism during that period, so I had no choice. I did hear about the Beatles and Queen, so you can’t say I missed too much.”

“You don’t even know about Metallica or Kiss! Of course you missed a lot, and we’re not even at the tip of the iceberg yet.”

“Let’s just keep our eyes on the road, I think the prick going 2km/h just put on speed,” Shane said blankly, obviously trying to put an end to the conversation.

It turns out he was right, as the trails of cars started moving faster and faster, until the road was practically empty apart from the ‘ghost mobile™’. The rest of the ride went along smoothly with no traffic at all, but attempts at conversations were dropped. Ryan was busy calming his nerves, because it just now dawned on him that he was going directly into the lion den, and Shane was memorizing the layout of the home incase there would be a problem. As the building appeared into view, the car stopped. At first, Shane thought Ryan had panicked, but looked to his friend to find him fiddling with the wheel and pedals, bewildered. So, they had run out of gas right infront of their destination. Definitely not a sign, everything is going to go swell.

The pair got out of the car in a nonchalant manner, to make the entities think that the human was not afraid. It probably failed, as Ryan tripped over his shoelaces when he went to pop open the trunk of the car for the jerry can. As he got out all the stuff and prepared it, Shane stood off to the side, searching for energies coming from the home. Fortunately, or unfortunately for Ryan, there were a couple of demons inside. 3 or 4, if he wasn’t mistaken. Two were definitely low level, mischievous troublemakers. The other (s) were a bit more of a threat, but not anything good ol Madej couldn’t handle. He turned around as footsteps crept up behind him to find his friend tugging their luggage along. The talker man went to lend a hand, and they entered the house.

Upon getting past the door, it immediately shut itself. Yet, the men were undeterred by this, and began filming. A couple bumps here, some voices and eerie words on the new spirit box, nothing out of the ordinary. The two weaker demons Shane had sensed disappeared back to hell near instantaneously once he began taunting them, which left only one. What the tall man had thought to possibly be two energies was only one, but it was very chaotic and all over the place. It tried to make objects fall off the shelves, but Shane was already adjusting them telepathically by the time Ryan thought he’d heard something. After a couple hours, they closed the cameras, so the human could enter a room alone with the creature. Uncertain as to what to say, he opted for the ol’ Shane Madej method:

“Uh, I don’t know if you know, but I’m alone now, a poor scared human, so if you could pick me up, slam me against the wall, or pull my heart out and shove it down your ugly throat while I fade out of consciousness, this would be the perfect time to do that.”

Silence. And then, a soft draft ruffled his hair a bit. He nearly jumped out of his skin, but stayed calm. This was all part of the plan, he wasn’t going to die, he would be saved in a couple-

So, you’re letting me kill you? To have your soul consumed, willingly?

A voice pierced his mind. It echoed in his eardrums, giving Ryan a headache. A laugh followed, amused at this feeble creature grimacing under the pain. Still, he put on a brave face, and said:

“Come out, I’m not scared of some wind making voices, I want to see the real deal before my death.”

Silence. And then, the air started to thicken, taking a vague humanoid figure. It wasn’t opaque, but you could see some of the details in his face. It’s smile, devoid of compassion, made the spirit look…hungry. Ryan gulped.

Chapter Text

I see how it is, how foolish you are. Do you think that a mere liquid will protect you?” The figure cackled.

“No, but I think another demon might,” Ryan replied, abandoning his act.

With lightning speed, Shane came out of the shadows, passing Ryan, and gripped the spirit’s neck tightly.

“Shan, it’s me, your ol’ pal Mirel, don’t ya rember’ how well behaved I was in your punishment ward? You won’t send me back right? I deserve a small break, don’t you agree?” The apparition croaked out.

Shane sneered, and tossed the vaporous body at the wall. Dist lifted off the ground, causing Ryan to cough. The demon and the spirit, however, seemed unaffected. ‘Makes sense’, the human thought, since both of them technically shouldn’t exist. Mirel laughed, drawing Ryan’s attention back to the fight. The ‘ghost’ kept dissolving and reappearing at will. The demon grew tired of this game very quickly, and got the spirit in a chokehold again once it materialized one too many times.

“If it was your intention, you would’ve sent me back the second you felt me,” the manifestation gloated.

“Nah, I can feel emanating from you, I wanted to play with you for a bit, show Ryan over here how it’s done. He’s been wanting to see this for a while.”

The ghost made a sour face as he exploded into dust as Shane literally squeezed the life force out of him. The demon turned to his friend, arms open. Ryan responded by accepting the hug.

Surprise surprise, the rest of the investigation went on without a hitch. The human was at ease in this place, something he never thought was possible in one of these places. Shane’s commentary and banter made so much more sense now. This was the first time Ryan felt that he was truly alive. But yet, something in the back of his mind wouldn’t let him fully bask in the moment. His brain whirred back to reality as he heard Shane stop recording. Now or never, the man thought. “What’s going to happen to you after I die?”

Shane froze. He would’ve expected anything, everything, apart from this. “What?”

“You’re immortal right? And unless I’m not human, which I know isn’t true, I am going to die one day, but…I just want to spend more time with you. I don’t want to leave, to go wherever I’m gonna be sent to, ya feel me?”

The demon frowned. “Soul bonding isn’t really my department. We’ll have to ask someone from downstairs.”

Ryan stopped fiddling with his hands. “Wait what? You serious? You can actually do that? I thought we couldn’t interfere with the afterlife.”

The tall man smirked. “Well, I can’t, but I know other demons who can. C’mon Ry, you didn’t really think I would leave you hanging after you asked to stay with a demon right? We’re best friends, remember?”

“Yeah. So how does next Tuesday sound? And can I have a bit more information on this ‘soul bonding’ thing first? I still want to have a bit of freedom, you know?”

“Wouldn’t dream of making you my ‘pet’. Some of my peers tried to get me in on the practice, but I wasn’t a fan of taking away the independence of a person I like. But no, soul bonding is nothing like that, it just means that our life forces will be connected, which gives you immortality, and gives me access to your mind, basically. This was used to hunt down criminals and figure out the deal with cultists back in the day,” he rolled his eyes, remembering one episode he would never tell Ryan about. “Anyway, I have a couple errands to run on Tuesday, but I think I can fit in a visit to my workplace in there.”

Ryan snickered, but looked around, a bit expectant. Shane sighed. “Yes, I’ll bring you there too. It’s time you meet the head honchos for yourself.” He made air quotes.

Laughter erupted from the house. Lightning struck outside, rain starting to pour from the sky. For a split second, the two friend’s silhouettes were illuminated on the pavement. Shane’s had horns and grew by the second, and Ryan’s was growing fainter.

Chapter Text

Tuesday rolled around, and Shane was late. Typical of him to be like that right when his life was about to change drastically. Ryan sighed loudly.

The air suddenly turned cold, causing the human to shiver. His phone screen froze, not responding to him tapping it. An old man came up to him, and put his hand on Ryan’s arm. “Son, may I look at that? I may be old, but maybe I can fix it.” He said. Ryan shrugged, and gave his phone to the stranger. Even if he was a thief, he’d be able to catch him with ease. The elder squinted his eyes at the device, turning it in all directions, then exhaled sharply. He handed Ryan his phone back. It was working again! The man turned to thank the old man, but didn’t find him. He’d disappeared without a trace. Frowning, Ryan looked back at his phone. He felt compelled to open his camera app, and his most recent photo was of Shane, horns protruding and everything, making a silly face.

“Madej, I am so going to murder you.” He clutched his phone tightly as his friend appeared from thin air behind him, chuckling. “You should’ve seen your face,” the taller man said, holding his mouth with his hand.

“And you shouldn’t have taken advantage of using an elderly man’s façade,” Ryan rolled his eyes. “I actually believed it!”

“Don’t worry, he’s been dead for a couple centuries, and told me he always wanted to be remembered as mysterious, so I’m actually doing him a favor.”

“He-that doesn’t make it any better!” The shorter man squawked. “You could go in any store and get the elderly discount, no questions asked, which you don’t deserve.”

“I think 2000 is in the age policy, so technically I’m rightfully entitled to that discount either way.”

“You-I can’t believe I’m gonna have to endure this for all eternity, and willingly, too!”

“You’ll get used to it,” the demon patted his friend’s back. “Just as Sara did.”

“Wait what? Sara’s immortal too?”

“Oh, did I forget to tell you about that? I thought I did. She’s my associate’s familiar, which is what we call the humans in this process. She’s been with him for about a decade. They’re just friends, so when she met me, there was no problem, and when she found out I was a demon too, everything was even better.”

“Huh. When I thought I knew almost everything, here you go surprising me again. Don’t think I’ll ever truly get used to see mythical creatures left and right now.”

“More like you’re gonna have to get used to jumping out of your skin each time you see one,” Shane chuckled, missing Ryan’s punch by an inch, “ ‘Oh my name is Ryan and I’m scared of g-gghosts!’” He did a horrible impression of his best friend.

“I do NOT sound like that you asshole!” Ryan tried to fight him again, without any luck. “What are we waiting for now, anyway?” He asked.

The taller man raised his eyebrows, then smirked as if he’d been waiting for this question. “Throughout the US, but it also applies to the rest of the world, there are some places that seem uninteresting to the human eye. But in reality, with the help of a creature such as myself, these spots can be so, so much more.” Be gestured at their current location, a bus stop right infront of a tattoo parlor. “Did you think I chose this place in total ignorance?”

“Kinda.”

Shane sighed. “Well, thanks to my handy dandy powers, I can do something here that will make your jaw drop.”

“Well mister magic man, let’s see it.” Ryan crossed his arms, almost certain that his friend was bluffing.

Shane took a step back, and breathed in. Mist suddenly enveloped the two, and when it dissipated, they were standing in a completely new place from the one they exited. It was unlike the human had ever seen in the area of Los Angeles, and never thought he would find such a place here.

He was standing in a vast hallway with a tall ceiling, made to accommodate even Godzilla. Rich decorations hung from the walls, which Ryan somehow knew, even if he wasn’t inspecting them close up, were made of gold. On each side of the corridor were rows of doors that seemed to never end. Each was different from the last, and from what the human glimpsed in an open door, entire civilizations could be found on the other side, even if that defied logic. Hell, everything he had come to learn a couple weeks ago threw his entire world out the window, so this wasn’t that surprising to Ryan.

The passage wasn’t the most social place, as the men didn’t run into almost anyone, apart from a lone creature that seemed to cower in their presence. It looked quite humanoid, but had hooves and horns…

“Holy shit, was that the Goatman?” Ryan asked as the hybrid nearly ripped a door off its hinges as it scrambled inside.

“Yup, our ol’ pal Stevie doesn’t really talk to me anymore after we humiliated him in his own home,” Shane responded, smirking.

“Damn, you really did a number on him that night, no wonder he wanted to get away from us,” The human replied, feeling just a twinge of sympathy.

“Oh, here’s our stop,” the demon pointed to the entrance on their left. “Be wary, Mephistopheles does not take kindly to stupid questions.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Ryan asked, narrowing his eyes.

Shane ignored him, and knocked three times on the modest door made of ebony. It creaked open almost immediately, and the demon wasted no time to enter, motioning at his friend to follow. They were met with a white room, devoid of furniture. A man stood in a corner, fiddling with air. His head jerked with unnatural speed in the intruders’ direction, his manic gaze petrifying Ryan on the spot. The animosity in his face vanished almost instantly, replaced by a malicious curiosity. The human gulped, but pulled himself together, actively inspecting the demon. He didn’t look like one, which Ryan wasn’t really too sure how to feel about, but it made his determination not falter.

Shane didn’t seem to have the same problem, lucky bastard, and strolled over to Mephistopheles, letting his glamour fall as he shook the older man’s hand. Ryan knew it was a disguise, that he looked vastly different underneath, the look in his eyes testifying that. But he wore the skin so well, it was even better than Shane’s demonstration at the bus stop a couple minutes ago.

“So how’s it going buddy, long time no see eh?” Shane clasped the other demon’s shoulder.

“While it is not in my best interests to be distracted by your antics, I must say, it is nice to have you back. What may I do for you today, was this young soul causing problems?” He pointed his chin at Ryan.

“Oh, no, we were wondering if you could bond our souls. I know you have other things to do, buuuut you’d set them aside to help our your friend with this favor right?”

Mephistopheles sighed loudly, then removed his glasses, cleaning them with a cloth. “Fine. But just so we’re clear, you’re on soul finding duty next time, I don’t want Boss man yelling at me if they escape again just because I took my eyes off them for a couple seconds.”

“Knew you’d agree,” Shane grinned, “Ry, come over here, the spell can’t work if you’re all the way over there.”

“Huh? Oh, right,” the man realized he was right near the door still, a good ten feet away from the two others, and ran up to join them, but he still eyed the stranger warily.

Shane noticed, and placed one arm around his shoulders, to ease the tension. “Come on, Mephi doesn’t bite, at least he doesn’t anymore, so you have nothing to fear.”

“Hmm, it might be my humanity that sets him on edge, he probably fears the horrors under the surface,” Mephistopheles thought out loud, “Might be for the best if I drop my concealment. If I’m going to bond your souls he’s gonna see it anyway, since I know you’ll be back here soon.”

He put his glasses in his pocket, and electricity crackled at his feet. Ryan yelped as the man shrank before him, going from 5’8’ to 4’9’. His irises disappeared as well as his pupils, his sclerae turning a dark green. Two more ears materialized behind his human ones, all four getting longer and conic, like a bat’s. His graying hair turned into black feathers, his hands growing three extra fingers on each hand. His skin turned scaly, feet destroying his shoes as claws popped out of them. He crossed his arms, visibly expecting more negative reactions. “So? Am I not all you think of when you try to sleep in a haunted house?” Mephistopheles said in a much deeper voice.

Ryan stuttered, clearly not expecting that question, and Shane winced. “Don’t mind him, he’s not exactly really confident on how he looks. It only took one look of abject terror once in the 1600s for him to throw in the towel. Just don’t be too snarky about it, a lot of the demons here are.”

“No, it’s not that, it’s just…Not what I was thinking of, that’s all,” the human quickly said. “I didn’t think you guys could look like this, it looks quite good.”

“Hmph. Well, we’ve dilly dallied enough, I say it’s about time for the bonding. Hold your hands together, and do not move. It is critical for this process.”

Shane gingerly took Ryan’s hands, and magically made their bodies as still as statues.

Mephistopheles nodded, and snapped his fingers. A book appeared out of thin air, and he began sifling through the pages. He found the incantation, and spoke with a slow and heavy debit. The words, Ryan could never begin to comprehend, but they spoke directly into his soul, giving him emotions he’d never felt before. It was overstimulating, honestly. A couple minutes went by before it got unbearable. The human’s teeth were so set, if he didn’t have the immoving spell on him, he’d be scared of losing them. A blast of energy formed between the two, which sent them flying in opposite directions.

Shane got to his feet relatively quickly, but Ryan’s head was spinning. He groaned as he pressed his forehead, which hurt so much. He blinked a couple of times, finding his best friend before him, offering a hand. He gingerly took it, but the pain didn’t immediately fade as he got up. He looked around, and to his surprise, found a perfect Ryan-sized dent where he landed on the wall. Mephistopheles didn’t look impressed at having to repair it, even though it probably wouldn’t take more than a few seconds courtesy of magic.

The human blinked once more, hard, and the pain disappeared altogether as he opened his eyes again. He raised his hand, and was surprised to see small sparks fizzing out at the fingertips. “Whoa,” he said, bemused.

Shane looked equally as confused. “I didn’t know this could happen.”

“Well, if you would've paid attention to my thorough explanation on soul bonding, you would’ve known that if the demon of the pair has the utmost faith in their partner, they can share their power between themselves,” The shorter demon explained, huffing in annoyance.

Ryan took another look at his fingers, and the sparks stopped. “Wow, we could do so much with this,” he chuckled, “I’m almost afraid.”

Shane arched an eyebrow, and grinned. “Well, do not be afraid, Ryan.”