Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The world was falling apart.

Sans recognized this blankly. It seemed their timeline simply couldn’t take it anymore. It was the end of the road. Timelines stopping and starting, tearing through space time. Destroying the world…

And then bringing it back.

Just so they could do it all over again.

He truly couldn’t understand. But hey, here’s their comeuppance, both of them. Sans for being unable to stop the human from continuing, for not trying hard enough to carve out his own future.

For giving up.

And of course the human, for weakening the world enough that it finally snapped, for killing nearly everyone, for killing his brother. But the look on their face…he couldn’t help but wonder what they were thinking. 

Here they were, together in this hall, the world falling to pieces around their feet, the numbers that made up their world corrupting and filling in with zeros. Black space. Nothing. Sans just closed his eyes, he didn’t want his final image to be the human. That mournful look on their face. He didn’t want to see it.

But his eyes were startled open when felt a hand grip his arm. The human…no, Frisk? And maybe someone else–was suddenly in front of him, a determined look on their face.

Sans had no idea what they were doing honestly, if they planned on killing him…well, it’s not like it’d make a difference either way, so he wouldn’t mind just taking it. But it wasn’t that. He was able to hear the human take a deep breath through the garbage noise of the dying world, and then, there was red.

The human’s soul. Still so bright, so determined, even though it also looked so worn.

Sans didn’t understand, but together they stared at it; It was melancholic for him in a way, this soul was the thing that had ruined their timeline, pushed it beyond it’s limits. He hated it’s power, but all he could feel right now was a far off mix of apathy and awe.

He was startled from his daze when he realized Frisk was talking in that soft voice of theirs, just barely peeking through the noise. It was pointless, but he leaned in closer to hear them.

“I think…I would like to try something. Sans…”

Sans just stared. Their expression turned introspective, like they were thinking inside their head. It also held a tinge of acceptance. It was different from the type of determination he saw from them, but somehow, it still seemed like a form of determination nonetheless.

“I am no scientist…there’s no way to know if it can work…”

He really didn’t understand what they were saying, were they going to try and continue? In this world? Hadn’t they done enough?

“I wish I could do more…for everyone else…haha…maybe this is just a useless effort to ease my conscience…”

Sans narrowed his eyes blearily as he listened. And it was beginning to get really difficult to hear them. So he got closer, so close he could feel the heat of their soul hovering out of their chest.

He ignored all the negative space encroaching around them.

“But I… we have done many unbelievable things with willpower alone. Maybe that can be enough. It will be enough.”

They sighed, breath heavy. They looked so tired. And he probably did too, if he could imagine his own face.

In an instant, their expression softened, but with that all too familiar glint of pure determination in their eye.

“Sans…everyone. I’m sorry. I would say I’d like to do it all over, but that seems callous at this point…” 

They shook their head, smiling slightly.

“So hey, if you appear on the other side, try to live with…determination, okay?”

Sans was barely processing what they were saying, partly because it was so loud, but also because it felt like he was in a daze, everything felt so far away...

Before he could get any words out, a terrible, hot feeling abruptly coursed through him, starting from his chest where his own soul lay and rapidly spreading outwards. With eyes the size of pinpricks, he looked down, realizing with numb astonishment that the human’s soul was now in his possession.

He took a quick glance upward, only catching a small instance of the human’s brief grin before everything seemed to break apart and wash away.

It was difficult to think, it felt as if every grain of dust within him was vibrating with energy, with the single minded desire to fall apart and change.

It was agonizing, but at the same time he just felt incredibly numb.

With absolutely no clue as to where he was, if he was dying, if he had somehow made a trip to the void, Sans simply squeezed his eyes shut and tried to will it to stop, to end somewhere.

And perhaps, he may be able to get that wish. After some amount of time, which in hindsight was probably only a few seconds, it felt like the latent energy in his body had hit a snag, and before Sans could think about what that would do, everything that comprised of him got pulled roughly in that direction.

Following that, what remained of his consciousness shut down.

Sans felt…warm. That was the first feeling he registered. An odd, full body kind of warmth. It was…familiar, in a way he could never hope to describe, and his split brain was slowly but surely piecing itself back together.

And honestly, he kind of wished it hadn’t, because the next thing he felt was a full body ache. Nothing crazy bad, his HP was obviously intact since he was…well, alive, but it still sucked. 

Sans groaned softly, lethargically raising a stiff hand to hold his aching head. The fact that his voice sounded a bit stranger than usual only occurred to him briefly before it was roughly pushed to the side in favor of a much more pressing discovery. 

There was stuff on his head that definitely hadn’t been there before.

Hair. It was hair.

The moment Sans had that thought, his brain suddenly kicked itself out of the stupor it was in and he flung himself upwards, wincing from lingering aches and pains.

Along the way, his eyes peeled themselves open. It was blurry at first, but everything quickly racked into focus with a few blinks. Afterwards, he was able to vaguely register the golden flowers that bloomed all around him.

He was still rather preoccupied with the hair thing though, so his current location was immediately put on the back burner. 

With a small amount of trepidation, he ran a hand through his…hair.

It felt a bit choppy, and pretty messy, and—due to the fact that he could see it in his vision—somewhat long.

He also of course noticed the hand. And how…not totally white it was, and how totally not a bone it was. It was pale and somewhat thin for a human arm, but it was unmistakably not the arm of the skeleton he was used to.

Sans slowly let his hands fall down onto the flowers beneath him, expression dazed as he processed his situation and tried to piece out what was going on.

So, he was a human.

Or at least, a very human looking monster—this much was obvious. Though he was at least pretty much wearing his usual attire (Small mercies).

His recent memories were still a little vague and pulling themselves together, but he clearly remembered the face of the fallen human—Frisk—and the bright red glow of a soul illuminating their somberly determined face.

They had talked about stuff…said sorry, and then…

Well, that’s where it got really tough.

He decided to put it aside for now and let the specifics come to him in due time.

Important points were, the world had been falling apart, the human did something—probably with their soul, if his condition was anything to go by—and now here he was…as a human. 

Sans sighed.

Just his luck, huh?

...By the way... where exactly was “here” exactly?

That abandoned question surfaced back as he slowly and carefully looked around.

Purple bricks, long vines, yellow flowers, a door leading to somewhere else, and finally, when he looked up, he was met with dappled rays of sunlight. He actually had to squint, which was very strange for him as a past skeleton.

He had never personally been here—Not with clear memories at least...but, he could still recognize it for what it was.

It was the Ruins.

Specifically, it seemed to be the place where Frisk, along with every other human who made their way into the Underground, had fallen down.

He numbly ruminated on these implications. Here Sans was, as a human, in the exact spot where Frisk had once landed presumably. And…

His soul. 

The thought jumped out at him like a bullet. If he was here, a human...then what had happened to his soul?

The innate fear of having the very culmination of his being changed and tampered with shook him, but in usual Sans fashion, he managed to avoid freaking out too bad.

All in all… he felt okay, and not too much different, so he was probably fine…probably.

But of course he still had to check out the situation. So, fighting down his trepidation and dread, he half reluctantly, and half hastily brought his soul from his chest.

What he saw made his breath catch in his now existent throat. The first thing Sans recognized was that all too familiar red, but upon a less startled inspection, that wasn’t the only thing there.

The red soul was bright and clear, and of course, entirely upright. Rather unnatural to a former monster like him, but very normal for a human soul.

However, overlaid with that red was another all too familiar soul: his own.

They seemed to overlap perfectly, an inverted white monster soul set over a bright red human one. And in the large section where they crossed, the color turned a reddish pink.

It was honestly unlike anything he had ever seen, and had this not been his own soul, he would have been giddy at the chance to study it, or at least as giddy as he could get these days.

As it was now though, it mostly left him a mix of fascinated and unsettled.

“this is…um, really something, huh?” he mumbled breathily, pausing afterwards while recognizing his own voice.

It had a similar tone and inflection, of course, but it was a bit higher and just a tad softer. Plus, it lacked that…sort of inexplainable buzz that all monsters who spoke without vocal chords had. Not surprising, since he totally had vocal chords now.

And, he had to actually open his mouth to speak.

The more time he spent with this body the more natural it felt to do so, but it was still annoying.

So much extra work to just speak. It was a real shame.

All that being said, a full Check would probably be wise. He didn’t Check himself that often; wasn’t much to look at really, abysmal stats aside from his frankly ludicrous MP, a boring and brief description, and the disappointment at the reminder of his ever weak constitution. This time however, it was actually different.

He checked his normal stats first, and felt the first bit of positive emotion he had gotten since waking up. His HP was one, but in parentheses, there was a 20. His other stats remained the same, but he was admittedly rather glad to have more HP, and paid it no mind.

So hey, this thing wasn’t a total bust…whatever this was.

Seriously, what had Frisk done?

Some vague memories were slowly returning to him, but it wasn’t enough to really piece out what had happened. He needed more time…but he probably shouldn’t just wait around here forever. 

With great reluctance, Sans pushed himself to a standing position and tip-toed out of the little patch of golden flowers. He took a couple more glances around, and then went cross-eyed as a petal flew down the middle of his face, presumably from where it had made it’s home in his hair.

Hair. So weird.

Sans reached up and began to brush off the various leaves, petals, and sticks that had somehow gotten there, and paused when he noticed that he was actually wearing goggles. They were situated comfortably on the top of his head, so comfortably in fact that he hadn’t even noticed them until now.

He pulled them off to get a better look at the one truly new article of clothing and curiously tapped the pitch black lenses. There really wasn’t anything especially remarkable about them, but in a vague way, they did kind of remind him of his eyes as they had been as a skeleton: round, and completely black. Guess the powers that be had a sense of design.

That aside, it actually felt incredibly unnatural to take them off, so he just shrugged, put them back on, and accepted the newest permanent addition of his wardrobe.

As he lifted up his arm in a very weird but satisfying stretch, he also began to consider his magic. 

It’d really suck if he wasn’t able to use his magic, even if it would be pretty weird for the fallen human to be able to use it. Especially his bullets. They were bones, so of course that would be incredibly strange and suspicious.

Still, a monster—even a former monster—just couldn’t feel right without their magic ready at their fingertips.

Not to mention, he’d dearly miss his ever convenient space-time hopping shortcuts and telekinesis.

Turns out he didn’t have to worry though, because his magic worked pretty much exactly how he usually expected it to. A neat pattern of bones popped up from the ground, a small Gaster Blaster materialized, and of course, his blue magic worked perfectly.

It all seemed normal, but upon closer inspection and a scrutinizing squint, he noticed that there was a slight…red tinted coloration in his attacks. Determination, most likely.

Sans shifted on his feet uncomfortably, squashing down the feeling of dread that came with the idea that he possessed determination. Aside from the irony in one of the laziest and apathetic guys out there getting such a thing, as a monster—former monster—who knew the effects, the idea of having it in his system was understandably unsettling. 

But hey, right now he was human, had a human soul and everything, so he probably wasn’t going to melt.

Probably.

Regardless of any determination weirdness, his magic still seemed to function like normal, and if you weren’t looking closely, you probably wouldn’t even notice the color. If things went as he was suspecting they might, he still would prefer to not use it out in the open though.

Sans was the type of guy who’d prefer to explain things in a fashion that didn’t actually explain anything at all. He liked his secrets, and this was definitely a secret he’d like to keep.Trying to explain his magic didn’t seem like a very fun activity, even if he usually found annoying people with his non-explanations very funny. Technically it was true that it was possible for humans to use magic, given the barrier, but as far as he knew pretty much no humans had continued the practice.

If it came down to it, he’d like to try and limit himself to blue magic. It was rare, sure, but not nearly as personal as bone shaped attacks and blasters from a forgotten man.

Sans released a heavy breath, deciding that he was finished messing around. At this point, he could admit he was stalling.

He was just… tired, it both felt like years, as well as just a few minutes ago that he had been standing in that hall, friends and family gone to an dispassionate human who had surely seen it all before.

And then at some point the world had finally gone taught and snapped like a rubber band.

But still, there was something in the back of his mind that told him to get going, to continue. He couldn’t put his finger on the sensation, but he finally decided he should probably listen. 

Sans peered into the dark entrance way leading out into the rest of the ruins. He honestly didn’t want to begin, but again an odd feeling belied that and made him decide to push forwards anyways. He couldn’t see a thing, given the lack of light, and human eyes were so not suited to seeing in the dark. Even so, the thing that popped up in front of him was clear as day.

“Howdy.”

Sans immediately reacted to the sound and stepped backwards, magic tense.

Sure enough, true to the voice, a familiar golden flower had popped up from the ground. But there was something odd about him. On his face was a thoughtful frown, rather than an unsettling smile, and his voice was less obnoxiously positive and more sullen.

Regardless, Sans was on guard.

Flowey regarded his caution with a blink, but he didn’t seem particularly displeased.

“You’re a human right? You fell from the hole up there?” He asked, sounding inquisitively concerned.

Sans couldn’t help the small bit of amusement that welled up in him when he nodded slowly. Yeah sure, he was a human, even if that was a rather recent development.

Flowey made a face that seemed both exhausted and resigned, then stared up at him seriously.

“Well, I’m Flowey, Flowey the flower, and this place,” he gestured vaguely around him with a leaf, “Is the Underground. And fair warning, it’s not a nice and cozy place for humans. Or pretty much…anyone in general.”

Sans’ face was fairly impassive, but he couldn’t help how his eyes widened and brows went up at that statement.

That really didn’t sound right.

And this Flowey was definitely not quite like the one from before. He began to get an uncertain feeling creeping in the back of his mind; sure he was in the same place, but was this really the Underground he knew?

“There are tons of monsters in the Underground, and they don’t play nice. I don’t know how it is up there, but down here? It’s killed or be killed.”

Killed or be killed, it was a statement Sans had heard, but Flowey said it with a sort of saddened, bitter resignation, instead of the psychotic glee Sans was distantly familiar with.

That look on Flowey’s face, his tired voice, and the statement that felt less like a threat and more of a cautionary warning...made his situation really start to settle in.

This was real, he was a human in a world of unfriendly monsters, and the people he had used to know were very far away. Before he could slip into a daze though, he quickly shook himself out of it. It probably wouldn’t be a good idea to wallow in his sadness and regrets at the moment.

Sans grinned slightly (although technically he had been showing a half grin this entire time. That was apparently a habit that wouldn’t change even in the prison of flesh.) and replied to Flowey’s warning.

“kill or be killed, huh? sounds kind of rough, buddy.” His grin stretched a bit further as he looked at the series of emotions that appeared on Flowey’s face: surprise, annoyance, nostalgia, and reluctant amusement. 

“Is falling down into a nigh inescapable prison full of horrible monsters funny to you?” Flowey grumbled, looking downright exhausted.

Honestly? Just a little, when Flowey put it like that. But overall…

“nah, kind of sucks…but hey, what can ya do? no use getting sullen about it.” This at least was something he believed in. Even if perhaps he wasn’t one to talk. But even when life sucked for him, he had at least tried to fill it with jokes and laughter.

And sometimes, you had to just take what was given to you.

“but if this is such a terrible place with terrible monsters, what about you? seem kind of nice to me.”

Flowey appeared to be somewhat taken aback by this question, and sputtered,

“I…w-well, I just...if you went out there without knowing a thing and got yourself killed uselessly, then….” Flowey looked a bit embarrassed and seemed to be looking at anywhere except him. But as he continued, his expression looked far off, like he was recalling an unfortunate memory.

“That’d just…be too unfair. And sad.” He finished, still looking like he was more in the past than the present.

“if you’re nice, then the other monsters could be nice too right? If they tried.” Sans sincerely wanted to believe this was true, even if it sounded terribly optimistic to him. And an Underground where monsters were doomed to always be terrible and mean was just too awful.

Flowey seemed partial to the idea if his wistful expression was anything to go by, but it ultimately turned into bitter resignation.

“That’s a lovely thought, but if you go into fights with that mindset, you’ll just get yourself killed…besides, I’m not a normal monster anyways.” He said that, but was obviously unwilling to elaborate on that last part.

Sans thought a little more optimism was in order (absolutely rich coming from him), but from what he could tell so far, Flowey was a reluctantly jaded flower who couldn’t stand the thought of leaving a human completely helpless in the Underground.

Frankly…it was strange, interacting with Flowey like this. Even now, a small part of him was entirely cautious and suspicious.

But as for the rest of him...there was no fooling Sans when it came to scoping out intentions. And while there were definitely things this Flowey wasn’t telling him, his feelings and words were genuine.

It was…kind of surreal. He wondered briefly if maybe this was all just a bad dream.

But still, the dream continued.

Flowey looked like he was about to say something else, but before he could begin, a flash of fire rushed in between them. It just narrowly missed sans who quickly backpedaled, but it definitely seemed to hit the little flower.

Sans felt oddly alarmed at that, rapidly scanning for him both with magic and his eyes. Thankfully, he confirmed him to be alive, although when the flames cleared, Sans could tell that he was more than a little singed.

He turned his eyes onto the person who had thrown that fireball, and even though intellectually he had been expecting it, seeing the old lady there with an unconcerned and wicked grin on her face definitely disappointed him.

Warily, he tried to get a bit closer to the burnt flower, afraid that another good hit would do him in for good. And now that Sans was here, Flowey probably couldn’t just reset…as weird of a prospect that was.

Toriel narrowed her eyes at him, colored a sickly yellow that creeped him out.

“Hello human, my name Toriel, and I am the… caretaker of these ruins.”

Sans smiled at her, trying to keep the nervousness off his face. With all the skin and muscles he now had though, he wasn’t 100% sure how successful he was.

“hey, hiya, human here.” He tried to not make a weird face at that.

She shone an unsettling smile towards him that made Sans uneasy, and the whole “evil version of my best friend” thing wasn’t helping things in the slightest.

“Excellent. You will come with me, and you would do well to follow my instructions. The monsters here will not be so kind.”

Sans kind of had his doubts about her kindness; glancing backwards, he saw that Flowey was cowering, but glaring upwards at her through droopy petals. He couldn’t exactly blame him for being pissed, all things considered.

Before Sans could think about his response, Toriel’s hand flared up with another deadly fireball, and immediately he was put on high alert.

“But before that, allow me to get rid of this… pest. ” She spat it out with venom, and Sans could feel Flowey shrink backwards behind him.

Man, this sucked.

Against his better but less kindhearted judgment, Sans quickly found himself standing directly in her way.

Blocking was not something he was partial to. At all. It went against all his instincts, but at the same time, he couldn’t exactly let a murder happen directly in front of him…not anymore, at least.

Toriel leveled her glare onto him, their respective heights making it feel like she was looking down on him, which she totally was.

“Move, that pathetic weed does not need to exist. All it will do is fill your head with all sorts of stupid ideas.” Oh, Sans definitely would love to move, but unfortunately his dastardly conscience was stopping him.

“even if that’s uh, true…killing him…is a bit overkill , don’t ya think?” He grinned lamely, trying to not show how anxious he felt.

Toriel seemed…amused, at his phrasing. She seemed to be holding back a smile as she considered him, still maintaining her intimidating aura.

They were left at a tense standstill, and just when Sans could feel the beginnings of nervous sweat roll down his face (or maybe it was the heat coming from Toriel’s burning fingers), the woman finally closed her eyes and dismissed her flames.

She looked back at him, eyes flickering with disdain towards the huddled figure behind Sans for a moment before turning back to him, cold but distantly amused.

“Very well, I will allow that weed some mercy, for now.” her face twisted up into a sneer at the word mercy , which Sans found concerning but at this point entirely unsurprising.

“However, you would do well to not test my patience again, I will not provide mercy twice.” She warned icily, to which Sans just nodded curtly.

Her expression then abruptly changed into a sickly sort of sweetness, carrying into her voice,

“Now then, let us be off.” She turned around and walked out of the dark room without looking back. Sans glanced back at Flowey, reluctant to leave the scorched flower there, but he simply shot a reprimanding glare his way and shooed him with a half charred leaf, urging him to hurry up.

It was probably a good call, so with one last look, Sans followed the woman into the Ruins.

Chapter Text

Sans stepped into the room, a large double staircase looming ahead of him in the dim light of the Underground. Toriel shot him a cold, scathing look for his apparent hesitance, but ultimately just continued on her way, easily scaling the staircase and disappearing into the room ahead.

But all that rapidly fell to the way side when Sans was suddenly swept away by that indescribable feeling yet again, a million times stronger than before, constricting in his chest and leaving him breathless. The beginning of a perilous journey stretched in front of him and–

He was filled with determination.

Sans froze, looking down in front of him. While he was surprised, a larger part of him wasn't in the slightest. It was familiar, deeply familiar, deep in his soul. A piercing, shining yellow beacon sat placed on the ground. A space time tether. A save point.

He swallowed dryly, fists clenching outside of his will. Perhaps there were more soul-deep changes within him then he first thought. 

It was uncomfortable, being swept away by a power and feeling that wasn’t him, but it was even more uncomfortable that he also felt entirely at ease.

He really wasn’t sure he liked it.

Well…at least now he had a word to put on that mysterious sensation that had pushed him forwards even when the Sans part of him continued to procrastinate.

Great. Just what he wanted, an alien substance manhandling his choices and changing his mind. All of a sudden, Sans understood how the human may have fallen victim to it. Not that it really justified their actions, but it provided a plausible explanation at least.

He was perhaps having a bit of a knee jerk reaction though; determination itself was not an evil substance. Sans could concede that much, despite his ardent distaste for the completely unbalanced power it had.

It had driven the human to go through with their resets and eventually murderous impulses. To finish what they started, to see all there was to see, just because they could. 

But, he knew that it had also been a force for good, that it had used it’s unending tenacity to see monsters freed on the surface. A perfect happy ending.

His memories of the resets were hazy, but somehow he felt like he could remember much more than usual for whatever reason, and contained thoughts and feelings that he was sure hadn’t come from him.

Sans had had enough unsettling thoughts to last him a lifetime though, so he elected to ignore it completely.

As for now…well he should probably just get it over with and save. Not that he planned on dying at all. He really didn’t want to experience it, frankly. But given the uncertain nature of this Underground, he’d be stupid to not take the insurance, no matter how off-putting it was.

Sans backed away from the save point, and breathed out slowly to release the adrenaline that followed it.

It was just too weird. Shaking his head, Sans figured he had probably made Toriel wait enough.

He took a quick shortcut up the stairs instead of walking, and when he walked through the grand doorway, he jumped in his skin internally when Toriel was directly in front of him. She stared him down dangerously, not flaming mad thankfully, but obviously displeased.

“You certainly are a brave child, continuing to test my patience like this, or perhaps you are just a fool.”

Sans grinned up at her with an uneasy nonchalance, hiding his nerves.

“uh, for one, not a kid. see? no striped shirt.” He pulled at his plain shirt, and winked. 

“and hey, i don’t wanna butt heads over this, i’m just a spark okay? my legs are tiny, not much fahrenheight.” He fired (hah) out some jokes, his tried and true method for releasing tension in a tough situation.

Thankfully, even in this world, it worked wonders on Toriel.

The former queen’s face reluctantly went through a series of surprised and delighted expressions, mixed in with some frustration. In the end, the bulk of her irritation had washed away into amused exasperation.

She released a sigh. “Fine then, do try and be a little quicker next time, however” her eyes narrowed in warning, but it was less intense than before, and she did seem genuinely concerned in her own way.

“If you lag too far behind, you may come into contact with something…dangerous.”

Sans kind of doubted that there was anything down here more dangerous than the scary furry boss monster. But he was getting what she was putting down.

“other monsters who want me dead more than you do?” He guessed wryly, the corner of his mouth turning upwards, probably in a much more expressive manner then he was used to.

Her face turned into a twisted smile,

“Exactly.” She confirmed.

Sans smiled back at her, hiding feelings of concern.

“great, looks like i got a real sweet welcoming party down here.” He shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets casually. 

It’s not like Sans was especially worried about dying. He had his magic, and he even had extra HP, so he was at least mildly confident about staying alive all things considered. (Not to mention his save point, but he’d really prefer to not use it). He could even use his shortcuts to avoid danger too, as long as he was careful about it.

However…the thought of seeing all sorts of monsters that he had used to know twisted into less-kind versions of themselves did rub him the wrong way. 

He pointedly avoided thinking of this world’s version of himself, and especially Papyrus.

Toriel snorted, before finally turning back around and walking forward, Sans following closely behind.

“Indeed.”

In the room ahead was a simple puzzle. Sans was certain he hadn’t seen it before, but there was something vaguely familiar about it.

That being said, some of the spikes seemed like distinctly new additions. Somehow, he just knew.

“The Ruins are home to many ancient mechanisms and puzzles. Do take care. You wouldn’t like to die a pointless and foolish death at the hands of some spikes would you?”

She smiled coldly.

“At the very least, it would be a waste of EXP.”

Sans tried to hide how unsettled that made him. To hear another monster talk so flippantly about EXP - especially someone like Toriel, made an uneasy feeling settle in his chest. He should probably hurry up and get used to it though, as it seemed like this would be an unfortunate pattern.

Honestly, he didn’t even want to look at her LV, despite the fact that it would be useful information. It’d hurt way too much.

“right…” He agreed vaguely, eyeing the puzzle to distract himself.

Toriel only gave him a second's pause before walking forward to step onto the puzzle herself.

“I will demonstrate this first one, but I do not intend on holding your hand every step of the way, so do pay attention.”

Sans figured he probably shouldn’t push his luck, so he dutifully did so and tried to look at least a little interested. He admittedly wasn’t used to seeing such ancient puzzles so it was somewhat engaging in it’s own way.

The puzzle was easily solved however, and they quickly moved on. The next room was much bigger, featuring some bridges, water, and red switches on the walls. 

He didn’t want to spend too much time doing it since Toriel was literally right here, but he took the opportunity to take a quick look at himself in the water. He was undeniably curious about his appearance, and there wasn't much to see without some sort of mirror.

Despite being obviously human, there were some obvious parallels between how he had looked as a skeleton and how he looked now. Round face, big round eyes, a seemingly permanent smile across his face, and small black pupils instead of white eyelights. Plus some messy white hair, which seemed about right for him.

He leaned away from the water when he heard Toriel begin to speak.

“Here, you must flip the correct switches. Do not make your decision hastily, or you may experience something quite shocking.” 

The woman snickered at her own joke, and Sans couldn’t help but do the same despite the implications of her statement. It was also a bit nostalgic…

“I will be up ahead. Be a dear and do it with a bit more speed.” 

He just shot her an easygoing grin.

“don’t worry, i’ll be faster than a thunderbolt.”

Sans caught the smile on her face as she walked away, so he counted that as a win. Small victories when it came to this world.

The whole electrocution business felt new, but it was still overall a pretty straightforward and easy puzzle. Sans did it quickly; And it’d be nice if he could get some brownie points with Toriel too, since he had kind of left a poor first impression.

The boss monster merely gave him some bland praise before continuing forward.

 Ahead was a small room containing only a few dead vines and a worn dummy. Toriel turned his way again and gestured towards the poor beady eyed sap, eyes narrowing.

“Inevitably, monsters will end up getting into fights with you, and you must know how to fight back.” She moved backwards, enough to give him ample space.

“Take a few hits on the dummy to get a feel for it.”

Sans couldn’t say he really wanted to. Aside from the fact that she was referring to punching the dummy, which he found to be an extremely amusing image for himself; Sans didn’t want to be hitting anything at all, dummy or not. Somehow, he felt like he knew the only way to reach a happy ending was to not harm a single monster. Even in this world…he really felt like it was true.

Of course, this Underground probably had a pacifist route locked on hard mode, but there was no way he was actually going to kill anything.

“uh, well, i already know my punches are bad, i’ll end up looking like a real dummy. And…” Sans chanced a glance back up at her as he slowly continued,

“i don’t really want to hurt anybody, ya know?” Perhaps that was a little too optimistic, he could admit that.

There may be a point where words and ACTs just weren’t going to cut it, and he may need to FIGHT, but even then, he refused to kill anyone. That was that.

Toriel regarded him like one would a child, annoyingly enough.

“Hmph, you are naive, human. This world is kill or be killed. Though I suppose that weed already told you that? With that weak attitude, you will never survive.”

Sans sighed quietly. It seemed this was an attitude that many monsters held. It made him consider the idea of what a happy ending for this world would really be anyways.

Even if he didn’t kill anyone and got to the surface with the barrier shattered, would monsters really be able to integrate peacefully with humans like this? If monster-kind went onto the surface with this mindset, he really didn’t want to think about what would happen next.

So, all that being said…how could Sans achieve such a difficult happy ending? It was intimidating. And it made him feel incredibly useless, small. There was no way he could achieve it.

Sans shook his head slowly, shrugging.

“yeah, i get that, maybe i won’t be able to get away without fighting at all, but…” His gaze drifted off to the side, recalling hazy and oddly personal memories of a previous timeline. Where the human had steadfastly refused violence, despite everything coming their way.

“but if things keep going this way, it’ll be bad for everyone, won’t it?” His grin then turned wry at the unexplained joke in his head. 

“sometimes a little determination to do the right thing can go a long way.”

And it was true, wasn’t it? that was really the key to a good ending.

And it was a key that unfortunately, he was holding.

Not that he had had the confidence that he’d ever be able to really use it. It wasn’t his power in the first place. There’s no way it would be enough.

Despite that, the voice inside still urged him to keep going.

Well...He supposed he’d humor it for a while longer.

Toriel stared at him with an unreadable expression, though Sans was able to glean a mixture of incredible tiredness, melancholy…and perhaps, a little nostalgia?

“Even in the event that this is true,” She began quietly in a flat tone,

“There is no point if you end up dead. You should put your own safety above your wishful ideals.”

Sans grinned, and shrugged.

“hey, someone’s gotta do it.” Desperate times if he was the one trying to uphold moral standards.

Toriel sighed and shook her head, but appeared to be tired of arguing about it.

“...No matter, this is a useless discussion. We will continue, since you insist on being so stubborn about a dummy .”

“what can i say, i’m a real dummy. ”

“You’ve already used that one.”

“heh, whoops.”

She said that, but Sans caught her smiling. 

Ahead was a rather empty room, and following that, a decidedly full room.

Full of deadly spikes that is.

He was pretty sure the solution had something to do with the odd floor pattern of the previous room.

However, when he went to inform Toriel of this (She obviously knew already, but she seemed be encouraging Sans to puzzle them out himself), she completely ignored him.

Instead, he only got a brief glance of warning before he was abruptly lifted off the ground.

“oh-"

Tucked unflatteringly but securely with a single arm around his waist, Toriel transported them both across with practiced ease.

“This is a particularly dangerous tra- puzzle , and like I said, it would be a terrible waste if you were to die a foolish death at the hands of a few spikes.”

When he was set back down, Sans chuckled and brushed off some white hair that stuck to his shirt, briefly missing the narrowly concerned expression on the woman’s face.

“right, i’d prefer to die a smart death myself-150 IQ minimum.” he replied with faux seriousness, pausing when he looked up at her, catching the look on her face.

“...Do you eat enough? You seem to weigh practically nothing.”

Uh…that was an unexpected question.

Well, he kind of just woke up like this.

He looked down at himself. He was pretty skinny for a human, but he didn’t think he was complete skin and bones. In comparison to before, he was quite heavy and squishy.

Instead, he thought that maybe Toriel was just too strong…and that he was small, but mostly the first one.

“i mean…sure, food really just passes right through me though.” That joke was made with his skeleton self in mind, but it suddenly made him think about the fact that; if he was now a human, who would normally eat human food…then…

Wouldn’t it pass right through his body?

…Gross, he vowed to never consume any human food, it was monster food all the way for him.

Actually all this thinking about food was kind of making him hungry…and he received a rather loud reminder from his human stomach confirming that.

“hah…well, I guess I don’t remember the last time i ate.” he chuckled lightly, vaguely embarrassed.

At the very least, he had absolutely no clue when the last time this had body ate. Or if it ever had the chance to eat anything at all.

Toriel considered him for a moment or two, before wordlessly taking out a couple of objects that revealed themselves to be little candies from her pocket.

She moved to hand them over, so Sans quickly opened his hands to receive them, a bit surprised.

“Use these to tide you over, we should get moving.” She said simply, turning away before Sans had the chance to say anything.

He stared at her back, and then at the candy.

It wasn't poisoned was it?

After a few moments of contemplation he finally made his decision, unwrapping one and carefully putting it into his mouth.

…A distinct, black licorice flavor.

Having a tongue now really uh…enhanced the flavor. For better or for worse.

Shaking his head, he glanced back up to follow the boss monster yet again, but…

Toriel was nowhere to be seen.

She was kind of hard to miss, and this was a really long and empty hallway, so she had either somehow sneaked behind him while he wasn’t looking and went the opposite direction, or she had scaled the hall with incredible speed and was already up ahead. 

As amusing a thought the first one was, it was probably the second one.

Oh well, better start walking. 

It sucked, it was terrible, too long and way too boring. And Sans was slow, there was a reason he just used shortcuts to get everywhere. When you were as weak, lazy, and short as him, walking places was really a chore.

Okay, he spoke too soon.

He felt it on the edge of his magical senses first, and what followed was a reddish froggit intercepting him with a decidedly dangerous hop. He avoided it, of course, but it had certainly taken him by some surprise.

Yeah, he wasn’t exactly used to other monsters coming right out and attacking him out of the blue.

And it seemed that this particular froggit refused to relent, sending multiple rounds of bullets his way. They were obviously meant to kill, even if the patterns weren’t especially complex. 

Now, how to get out of this situation?

“hey, uh, you seem pretty cool?”

Not much reaction. He sighed, things couldn’t be so simple could they?

“alright, trying to kill me is cool and all, but there’s probably more to you then that isn’t there?”

The froggit paused briefly; attention acquired.

"You got a lot of great qualities, you look awesome, you probably got some great non-murderous hobbies you enjoy, and your bullet patterns are to die for.” A morbid joke, but definitely still funny.

More importantly, the froggit had paused it’s attacks completely, staring at him.

So, Sans crouched down in front of it, giving the monster his best genuine smile.

“so hey, we don’t gotta fight, you’re already the coolest froggit around!"

It didn’t seem to understand, but given the blush that appeared on its face and the wide, puppy-eyed stare he was getting, it was probably flattered anyway.

Sans laughed lightly, reaching out a careful hand and patting the little monster on the head. It was stiff at first, but it quickly melted into his hand with eyes still transfixed on his face.

That was a little odd, but it was still kind of cute.

“heh, you’re actually a pretty nice guy, huh…” He murmured quietly.

It was…reassuring. 

He had said that to Flowey, that the other monsters could probably be good if they tried, but honestly he hadn’t really known for sure. He had just wanted to believe it.

But seeing this…it confirmed it.

These monsters could be good…and maybe they had used to be good, they just needed the opportunity to try.

That now familiar feeling rose up in him again, a sort of motivation that he had lost a long time ago, mixing with human tenacity. He sighed, but allowed it to linger for just a while longer.

Before long, he stood up and waved the froggit goodbye. It seemed rather sad at his departure, but allowed him to leave without a fuss.

He finally reached the end of the hall, and it had felt like quite the journey, a whole adventure.

He supposed it was a taste of what the rest of this experience would be. Honestly…exhausting.

But…it could be worse.

When Sans approached, he realized with amused befuddlement that Toriel was actually behind the lone pillar all along.

He had admittedly not considered this third option, although a part of him in the back of his mind had their expectations confirmed.

Toriel moved back out from behind it, seeming annoyed.

“You certainly took your time…” She huffed, glaring at him without much heat.

“heh, like i said, i got short legs.” Sans shrugged, scratching his cheek.

“‘sides, i also had an encounter, of the froggy kind.”

Toriel straightened at that, narrowing her eyes at him and subtly checking him for serious injury. Sans waved off her concerns with a low chuckle.

“nah, don’t worry, i’m good. we hashed it out, all peaceful and stuff. he’s pretty nice guy when he aint tryin’ to murder you.”

Toriel looked rather skeptical unfortunately, but she simply shook her head and sighed.

“If you have found a method to avoid death, then no matter.”

It certainly was a method alright; apparently sincere compliments went a long way with froggits, no matter the universe. Although it had definitely taken a bit more effort than usual.

Sans then found himself blinking in mild surprise when Toriel suddenly put a massive brick phone in his hand. The phone had looked somewhat small in her hands, but absolutely huge in his. Were his hands really that small?

He'd like to blame it on the human thing, but he unfortunately remembered that it had been the exact same way when he had helped Tori out with the texting function. It also reminded him of the one Frisk had used, which was not surprising since it was probably one in the same.

“This is a cell phone, and this is my phone number.” She gestured pointedly to the ground as she continued, leveling him with a dangerous glare, though by now he was mostly used to it.

“You will remain here and wait for my return while I take care of some…business.”

Toriel looked behind her towards the rooms ahead.

“Beyond this point is dangerous, and with your flimsy kindness and tiny legs, you will most likely die.”

Ouch, how harsh. Although, it was true that flimsy kindness probably wouldn’t get him very far.

Toriel said very little else aside from another icy glare for good measure, finally leaving Sans alone, giant phone in hand.

“welp…” For now, Sans decided that this was an excellent time for a break.

Sans flopped bonelessly onto the ground, laying spread on the floor.

It was decidedly...uncomfortable, but Sans had slept in worse places before, and most certainly worse floors specifically. So all in all, not too bad. a 6/10 floor.

As he lay there, surrounded by airy silence and the quiet sounds of water that ran through the entire Ruins area, dismissed thoughts slowly began to began to creep up on him.

How Frisk had brought him here… why they had brought him here. The daunting journey ahead of him. The people he had left behind… Papyrus-

Sans abruptly sat up.

Maybe a break wasn’t such a good idea after all.

Fortunately, he wasn’t left alone with his thoughts for long, as a familiar little flower popped up from the ground right next to him. Sans was admirably unfazed, and was honestly quite glad to see the flower for several different reasons.

“hey, bud, what’s up?” He grinned, but after a moment, Sans scanned him with concern.

Flowey was still rather worse for wear, missing a hefty chunk of HP, and scorched around the edges. That seemed kind of painful.

Said flower just huffed at him, clearly a little disappointed at the severe lack of reaction at his sudden appearance, and glanced to the side.

“Hmph…I’ve been worse. Don’t waste your time worrying about me, got it?”

Sans rather disagreed, his little flowery friend looked like he had taken a bath in charcoal, and was missing a little too much health for comfort. Sans thought about it for a second or two, then remembered that he had actually received two pieces of candy from Toriel, not just the one.

Pulling it out from his pocket and unwrapping the candy, Sans held it in Flowey’s direction, an incredulous look on the flower's face.

“here, i got this from the lady. it’s uh…” He made a face that was a mix of grossed out and amused. “got an interesting flavor, but it’s not too bad, and it restores HP.”

Flowey looked at him like had grown a second head. That’d be hilarious, but he was pretty sure humans didn’t do that.

“its uh, not poisoned if you were worried about that. just to my taste buds …but yeah i already had one, so it’s fine.”

Sans received a decidedly unamused look at his terrible overused pun, but before he could try and think of something else to convince him, the candy was suddenly snatched from his fingers.

Flowey was looking off to the side in huffy embarrassment, but regardless, he had taken the candy.

“...Gross.”

“right?”

Sans chuckled and smiled sincerely at the little flower, very glad that Flowey wasn’t literally on death’s door right in front of him.

He was also glad that apparently Flowey could eat no problem. He didn’t exactly have much experience with determination fueled flowers, but it seemed that regardless, Flowey was a living, magical being through and through.

Under his smile, the little flower gave him a wide eyed blink, flushed, then quickly looked away again.

It was pretty funny, didn’t Alphys have a term for this kind of thing?

“W-whatever! Thanks…I guess.” He managed to move his leaves in a convincing arms crossing pose, trying to put a barrier between them.

Ahh, that’s right, it was tsundere.

Laughing at his own private joke, Sans finally stood up and stretched.

Yeah, this break had gone on long enough, and he was entirely unwilling to continue stewing in his thoughts. Although Flowey did provide a decent buffer for that kind of introspection.

“welp, we should probably get a move on, don’t you think?” Sans said, making for the next room and glancing around.

Flowey’s startled voice yelped a little ways behind him, before suddenly sounding much closer.

Right next to him in fact.

“Wait! Didn’t she just say to stay right here? Do you really want to piss her off even more?” Flowey questioned, glaring up at him with poorly hidden concern.

Oh, so he had been listening, huh?

“i mean…nah, but…” Unbelievably enough, Sans didn’t want to just sit around right now.

“it’s boring right? and hey, i’ll be fine. she probably won’t kill me. maiming might still be on the table though I guess.” he shrugged casually, grinning down at the disbelieving flower.

“You…. ugh, it’s not just about that, idiot!” The name calling was oddly nostalgic even if it was much less venomous than usual, and it brought an unbidden smile to his face.

“There are tons of other monsters out there! not to mention death traps. Hmph…as much as I hate to admit it, she really is your best protection in here for now…”

Sans considered Flowey for a moment, and ultimately dismissed his him with an unconcerned shrug.

It was true that while Toriel was pretty dangerous, she was also top dog around here.

Had he been a normal person, it probably would have been a good idea to stay on her good side, following instructions to the letter. But...

“we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, ok?” Sans’ smile widened when he had a thought, causing Flowey to regard him with wary suspicion, as if expecting something.

“just froggittaboutit. ”

Flowey’s entirely unsurprised but utterly disappointed groan made it all totally worth it.

Getting other people to laugh at his jokes was always great, but annoyed groans were honestly almost just as good.

“...You’re way too carefree, you know.” He grumbled, but was fairly placated.

“heh, seriousness doesn’t suit me.” Sans grinned. The only response he got was a shake of his head and a sigh.

Since it seemed like Flowey was completely tired of dealing with him, Sans tilted his head and took the opportunity to take a glance around.

He spot a wary froggit watching him, eyes bugged out and shaking in it's metaphorical boots. It didn’t appear to want to fight per say, but it was obviously scared of him and frozen in fear.

Well that wouldn’t do, he should probably try and set a good example for humans (Even though he wasn’t really one), and trying to alleviate monster-kind's paranoid fears about them would most likely do this society some good.

If they saw that humans could be good and wouldn’t always just attack them out of the blue, they might hesitate a little before declaring war on them in turn.

And maybe they'd reconsider their approach on the usage of violence. Although that was probably a tad too much to ask for, at this point.

It wasn't like Sans especially liked humans either, but even he knew that not one human was the same as another. And generally they weren’t all that murderous.

Sans approached the little frog monster slowly, ignoring the protest of Flowey from behind him, crouching down in front of it, much like he had done before. The froggit slunk away from him, clearly wanting to run away.

“hey pal, i ain’t gonna hurt ya. just wanted to say hi.” He gave the frog a gentle smile.

“so, uh, you don’t gotta be afraid of me, i wouldn’t hurt a fly.” He chuckled, settling down on the floor in a cross legged position to hopefully seem more harmless.

“actually, I met a different froggit in the room before, he was a pretty cool dude actually-oh okay then-”

Sans blinked at the froggit that had now hopped into his lap. Were these guys touch starved or what? He glanced at Flowey who was now next to him, glaring at the froggit, and utterly gobsmacked.

“heh, told ya.” Sans smiled lightly his way.

"Ridiculous..." Flowey whined lightly, pouting at both him and the froggit.

"heheheh, jealous?"

"WHAT?! I WOULD NEVER BE JEALOUS OF THAT FROG-"

"hm? I was talking about being jealous of me."

"..."

Flowey looked like he was struggling to formulate a response to that, but before he could they heard a low croak from down below, grabbing their attention.

“...You’re nice. And warm.”

Sans titled his head, admittedly a bit surprised. Was being nice really so strange? And Sans wasn’t entirely sure if by warm they meant his countenance, or just the lap the frog had made its home in. 

Maybe it was both.

“well, i try.” He shrugged. Sans had never considered himself the nicest guy underground exactly, but in comparison to the world weary and paranoid monsters down here, maybe now he was.

“guess now you know that bein’ nice ain’t too bad, you should try it out.” He pat the froggit’s head, and gently pushed it off his lap before standing up. 

The froggit hopped away with some pep in his step, and Sans gave him a lazy but friendly wave.

When Sans turned back around, Flowey was leveling him with an inscrutable stare.

“If only it were that simple…especially outside the Ruins.” He said quietly, an odd look in his eyes.

Sans studied his expression for a few, long seconds, before closing his eyes and stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“yeah, i know it won’t always be that easy... but hey, gotta start somewhere right?”

Flowey evidently didn’t know what to say to that given his lack of response, so Sans simply looked away and left him to his thoughts, subsequently spotting a large pile of crusty red leaves.

They were beautiful in their own way, he thought.

And right after he kicked them upwards to watch them scatter and fall, that overwhelming sensation washed over him again with a start.

His breath hitched, but he was at least kind of familiar with the feeling, so it wasn’t as bad as last time. It be nice if he could get a little warning though.

Just like before, a save point now sat in front of him. He felt Flowey peak around his legs to get a look at it.

Sans was pretty sure other monsters couldn’t see it; he certainly had never been able to before, but apparently Flowey’s previous experience with it lended him the ability. Even if he couldn’t use it.

“So you really do have it…” Sans heard him murmur quietly. Evidently he hadn’t seen him save the first time.

Flowey had an interesting look on his face, a mixture of longing, and relief. He glanced up at Sans.

“It’s a little more reassuring to know you can save. Do you know how to use it?”

Sans shrugged, staring at the golden light, unsure of how his expression looked at this moment.

“more or less. save somewhere, and it brings you back when you die."

Flowey looked up at him, narrowing his eyes with a stony huff.

“Yep, I wouldn’t be surprised if you ended up having to use it a lot. So hurry up and save, yeah?”

Sans forced himself out of a stupor, nodding along with Flowey’s encouragement, distaste for saving disregarded for the time being

Determination coursed through him, refreshing his motivation and tethering his soul to a new spot in time.

it was easier the second time.

Sans hid his uneasiness as he backed away, shooting Flowey a relaxed smile,

“let’s get going then.”

Chapter Text

And so together they went.

The rest of the Ruins wasn’t too bad, all things considered. 

There was a bowl of that same licorice candy up above with a little note on it saying:

‘Take one. Or else.'

And since Sans was most definitely an upstanding, law abiding citizen, he only took the indicated amount. Had to set a good example, after all

One for him, one for Flowey, and one for the froggit outside. 

Of course, apparently the frog monster didn’t want it (although the gesture was appreciated), so tragically Sans had to keep its share...he kept Flowey’s too, but that was mostly for safe keeping.

The puzzles ahead weren’t terribly difficult, even if they had deadly consequences for failure. When it came to the “hidden path” puzzle however - as he had aptly named it - Sans decided it was just too annoying (and too much walking), so he took a shortcut. 

Much to Flowey’s bafflement.

“Wh- what was that?!” he sputtered, trying to understand how Sans had gotten across in an instant when he wasn’t looking.

“huh? i just took a shortcut.” Sans shrugged, but froze slightly when he saw the expression on Flowey’s face. 

Maybe he should have called it something else.

“A…Shortcut…?” Flowey was squinting at him suspiciously, so Sans made a cursory attempt to backtrack, even though he knew it would probably be ineffective.

“eh, actually, it’s more like a…magic trick. a human one.”

Flowey shot him an unamused stare, an expression the flower had completely perfected. It was truly a honed craft.

“Right…” 

Oh man, this is what he gets for being lazy.

Frankly, the idea of letting everyone know exactly who he was, or used to be, made him…uncomfortable. 

Somehow. 

Aside from it just being a pain to explain, right now if he started trying to really be Sans, then the road ahead of him started to appear unbelievably daunting.

There was no way Sans could do this, after all.

Flowey stared at him some more, as if he was trying to solve a particularly difficult puzzle.

Had he been anyone else, Sans may have started to squirm. 

Then, he asked an unexpected question.

“By the way…what’s your name?”

“my name? uh…”

Now that was a million dollar question.

What was his name? 

Well, of course, his name was Sans, but he couldn’t exactly continue to use it if he apparently wanted to stay undercover. It was just way too obvious.

But…

Was he really ready to abandon it?

Abandoning his name felt like throwing away everything about who he was; had used to be. At this point he had very few things connecting him to his original shattered timeline, and the thought of leaving anything behind made Sans queasy. Maybe he was being dramatic but…

It was kind of…way too big of a step right now.

“just ‘human’ works fine.” He shrugged. It was more or less true anyways, that’s what everyone down here seemed to call him. He also remembered that they had never actually learned Frisk’s name until the very end.

Not that he really remembered the events around that time very well, he could remember…something? But the memories surrounding all that were hazy at best and nearly non-existent at worst.

Flowey sputtered at his incredibly unhelpful answer though, and interrupted his thoughts.

“Wh- It’s just your name! Why can’t you tell me? That’s so obviously suspicious!” He complained, crossing his leaves.

Sans closed his eyes with a quiet sigh under his breath, then crouched down so he was eye level with the flower, who stared back steadily with obvious annoyance.

He rested a hand on his cheek, absently recognizing how warm and squishy it was while he thought. He didn’t want to say…but, he didn’t really want to actually lie to Flowey either. 

Trust went both ways, yeah?

“yeah, i guess so…but hey, we all got our own secrets we’re not ready to share yet, am i right?” Flowey cringed and shrunk backwards when Sans leveled him with an understanding, but pointed look.

“there are a few things i just don’t wanna say. but hey,” Sans gave him a lazy wink, “i wouldn’t mind trading a secret or two between us, if you’re willing to go that far.”

Flowey frowned, considering his words. It was obvious he was deeply curious about Sans. But to Sans’ delight and relief, Flowey seemed unwilling to push too far. 

And also unwilling to share any secrets of his own.

If it had been the Flowey from his world, he would have pushed and pushed until he had gotten all the answers he wanted, no matter what.

In some ways… this world wasn’t so bad.

“...Fine, keep your secrets.” Flowey sighed, disappointed but resigned. Directly after, he shot an unimpressed glare his way.

“But if you want to keep them so bad, maybe try a little harder at hiding them, idiot. ”

Welp, he got him there.

“heheh… i’ll try.”

Rolling his eyes, Flowey shook his head and gestured ahead of them.

“Well, if you really can take… shortcuts ,” He said it with the expression of someone who thought it was a ridiculous and silly name. 

“Then just skip all this stuff, it’s a waste of time.”

“now you’re speakin’ my language, less work the better.”

“That is not what I meant.” Flowey groaned, but it just made Sans smile wider. 

Looking forward, Sans started thinking through the space-time calculations before suddenly pausing, a thought occurring to him.

“uh…i’d take you along, but i’m actually not sure how that’d work when you’re in the ground…”

Flowey also paused and then made a face, probably agreeing with his hesitance.

“Ugh, yeah, don’t even try. It’s fine, I’ll catch up.” With that, Flowey disappeared under the ground without another word. He really was speedy with that, wasn’t he? 

Oh well…

Sans skipped the next puzzle without even lending it a glance, but decided to stop in the next room when he noticed that cute little mouse, ever determined.

Hah, it looked like the mouse and trapped cheese were the same as ever. The world around may have changed, but a mouse was still just a mouse, and it wanted the cheese stuck to the table.

The tenacity of it…Ah, determination again. 

Sans still didn’t really understand the deeper methods behind the save points, but he stopped to save regardless. 

Right as he finished, Flowey popped up right next to him again.

The flower had a vaguely annoyed expression on his face, so Sans wondered if perhaps he was hoping to startle him one of these times. 

Unlucky for him, Sans was immune. 

“hey, what’s up, weren’t gone long, huh?” He grinned. Flowey just rolled his eyes in response.

It seemed like he was starting to get used to Sans’ unflappable attitude. A shame.

“I’m glad you’re at least aware enough to make sure to save. Don’t skip a single one!”

He put his hands up in front of him in a placating gesture, raising a brow at the flower’s steadfast insistence.

“i got i got it. man…what’s up with these things anyways? how do they decide where they appear? and sure, they save me the worry about dying for real, but do they gotta feel so…weird?” He questioned, both tired of and incredibly curious about these save points. 

They had done some study on them.

Peripherally.

But they had never actually been able to study one up close and personal. He knew very little on how exactly they functioned. 

The end results of their existence had always been the more pressing matter anyways.

Flowey received his questions with a confused quirk of his brow.

“Huh…?? Well golly, I don’t know how it works. Just that it does. You get determined, you save, and you’re immortal as long as you want. Are the details really important here?”

Sans crossed his arms, reluctantly amused at Flowey’s sheer disinterest in the science behind the matter. Flowey was usually pretty curious, but apparently he had no mind for science.

“they totally are.  Sans argued, but Flowey was technically right that, at the moment, there was really no need to think too hard about it.

Although in light of how his own universe had snapped from the strain of far too many resets, perhaps it would be best to look into it at some point. Reopening that particular research would be quite the experience for him.

The flower started on a snarky reply, but he was abruptly interrupted by a shower of deadly tear-drop shaped bullets, and it came from a face that Sans immediately recognized.

“You guys are toooo loud! Quiet down!”

A rough and weary looking Napstablook glared at the both of them with an anxious sort of jitteriness.

Apparently they had been sleeping not that far from where Sans and Flowey were arguing. Haha. Whoops.

“heyyy pal, we didn’t mean to disturb ya we just-”

Sans evaded a shower of deadly raindrops with a brief shortcut, not entirely confident in his ability to evade them otherwise. He probably wouldn’t be able to use his shortcut as much in the future, so he may as well get some mileage out of it now.

Or maybe it was because he wouldn’t be able to use it as much in the future he should try and get some practice avoiding it.

…Well, whatever.

After Sans had cleanly dodged the attack with his cheat, it occurred to him that Flowey had also been right next to him.

He only got to worry about it for about a second though, because he then spotted the flower popping up from the ground somewhere nearby.

He really was good at that, wasn’t he?

Sans turned in the ghost’s direction, putting his hands up in a harmless gesture and a strained smile.

“look, i’m sorry we interrupted your napstablook, but you don’t gotta try and murder us for it do ya?”

The ghost’s face turned into a hopeless looking sneer, shaking his head.

“You’ll just die anyways…may as well get it over with.”

Sans found himself frowning. He knew Napstablook was pessimistic, but this was a little much. He wasn’t exactly one to talk, but as of recently Sans was beginning to find a couple reasons to try just a bit harder.

“nah, i uh…don’t really plan on dying. i’m pretty good at it too, like a cockroach.”

Not that Sans actually knew what a cockroach was like, he’d just read it in a human book at some point. Hey, maybe trying to talk about human specific stuff would make his whole deal a little more convincing

Or, he’d say something completely wrong and blow the entire thing, it could go either way honestly.

“Nobody plans on dying…most don’t. It doesn’t matter, struggle all you like, you’ll still die.”

Sans found himself letting out a sigh, easily dodging through attacks like he’d done it all his life, despite the difficult patterns. 

This whole thing was kind of difficult. Technically Sans could just shortcut out of this situation. And honestly, he wanted to. The looks Flowey was sending him certainly indicated that he thought the same.

But…

It just didn’t seem right to leave things like this completely unsettled. A happy ending wouldn’t just be achieved by going through and not killing anything. Monsters themselves needed to learn to change, no matter how big a task that was.

So, abandoning a fight without at least trying to end it with ACTs just seemed wrong.

“that doesn’t mean-” He was briefly cut-off by a barrage of bullets. “that you shouldn’t try!”

Napstablook shook their head with sullen sluggishness.

“I’ve seen other humans go through here before. They tried. Really hard. But in the end…they died.” The ghost looked up at him with his empty, despondent eyes.

“So just give up. I did.”

Both Sans and Flowey froze.

Flowey’s face held a terribly stricken expression that was full of poorly hidden guilt, but at this particular moment, Sans didn’t pay it much mind.

Haha…Those words were awfully familiar. Somehow, he knew they had come from him.

“nothing will ever change if no one tries.”

Napstablook finally stopped, sullen face staring at him intently.

“and you plan on being the one to try?” Sans knew they couldn’t really know, but somehow it felt like they did. That they knew what a crazy, ridiculous, and hilariously ironic idea that was. 

But…well... Maybe he hadn’t before, but right now? 

Sans had the power in his hands to change things. To change fate.

Who else could it be but him?

If you have a special power, don't you have the responsibility to use it for good? Somehow, he knew that he had said that too, even if he didn't remember when.

“...yeah.” Sans said simply, towards himself more than anyone else. He’d try…a little.

Papyrus would have wanted him to.

“and you know, you can try a little harder too.” 

Napstablook shrunk back into themselves, voice sounding a bit more how Sans was used to hearing them.

“I…there’s no way, I-”

Sans managed a sincere smile their way, finding himself taking a page out of Papyrus’ book.

“nah, i believe in you. you’re super cool, after all.”

Napstablook’s eyes widened, a ghostly blush appearing on their face. 

“O-ooohhh um…”  With that, what remained of the monster’s hostile intent had completely disappeared, and Sans felt that mercy had finally been achieved.

He patiently waited for them to struggle through their next words.

“I… Ugh jeez, I-I didn’t expect to find someone so nice here today…” They sighed, eyes drifting off to the side sadly.

“Are you going to…leave this place?”

“that’s the plan.”

The ghost drooped at that, still pessimistic but not murderous.

“It’s really dangerous out there, you know. There are a lot of mean people. They’re…also not trying.”

Sans understood what he meant.

“welp, guess i’ll just have to try a little harder on their behalf. Man…i hate extra work but…” He grumbled, but was grinning regardless.

Sans received a ghost of a smile in response, and he counted it as a win.

Napstablook's expression turned contemplative, slowly getting their words out.

“I…actually live beyond the Ruins and…well. You could visit…if you want…”

Then, they shook their head, just a little more resolute.

“No. You should visit…so…don’t die.”

Sans blinked at the invite, before grinning widely.

“i’ll try.” 

The ghost gave him one last tiny smile before disappearing completely, off from whence he came.

Well…that was eventful. 

It then occurred to him that he should check on Flowey. He hadn’t payed much mind to it at the time, but he had still noticed that Flowey had been affected by Napstablook’s words too.

The thoughtful stare he was getting from the flower gave him pause, however.

“So…You’re planning on leaving the Ruins after all, then?” Flowey asked him, obviously trying to keep any emotion out of his voice.

Sans tilted his head at the question, he was pretty sure that the flower had wanted him to leave anyway.

“yep, you don’t want me to?”

Flowey’s face flashed with something that felt like agreement before he quickly shook his head, wiping the expression of his face and replacing it with furrowed brows and a glare.

“I do want you to! I do! I…it’s just…” Flowey’s face clouded with frustrated uncertainty, biting his lip.

He did his best to regain himself, huffing in an unconvincingly casual manner.

“I just-”

“you just don’t want to see someone you know get hurt again, right?”

Flowey froze.

“That’s…”

It seemed he couldn’t muster up any response.

Sans sighed quietly while he shook his head slowly, crouching down so they were eye level yet again, and a soft smile on his face.

“I appreciate the thought, and honestly…I get where you’re coming from. I wanna just throw up my hands and relax too. She’s a little weird, but I bet living here with Toriel wouldn’t be too bad.”

Flowey’s eyes widened and he almost seemed glad.

“Then-!”

“but i can’t.”

Flowey looked stricken, and shrunk backwards. His feelings were obvious, and it appeared he realized it too, as he then tried to school his expression and body language a little better.

Not that it worked that well, especially on Sans.

“...And why not. You’re lazy right? You don’t want to give up? Hmph, well, even though you always end up doing things the hard way regardless…” He received a skeptical glare at that.

Sans couldn’t help but be amused, because it was kind of true that he hadn’t exactly been practicing what he preached lately in that regard, but…

His face was swept up in a wistful and painfully longing expression at the thought of giving up. He did. He really really did. He wanted to give up. Even with all this determination, and everything he had said to Toriel, Flowey, and Napstablook. Sans wanted to just throw in the towel.

Old habits die hard. Determination or no.

“honestly…i do.”

Flowey’s face fell, and now he just looked incredibly lost and confused.

“Then why…” He trailed off, voice quiet.

Sans closed his eyes, really thinking about why he hadn’t given up yet. Why–despite everything–he had decided to continue this far.

“because… i owe it. to a lot of people i think…to at least try.” 

And because he could, he would.

Flowey was silent for a while after that, face distant as he sat on Sans’ answer. 

After some time, the flower finally sighed, crossing his leaves and rolling his eyes before he looking back up at Sans with that now familiar look on that face of his that indicated that he was feeling both annoyed, and concerned.

“...Alright. You better take me with you though!” Flowey directed at him a sneering look, but it was obviously covering up a much softer feeling.

“You’ll probably end up dying…hugging some crazy monster or something, otherwise.”

Flowey was trying to play it cool, but it was way too transparent to Sans, who couldn't help but laugh.

Much to the flower’s embarrassment and chagrin.

“S-shut up!! You… you…! ”

“smiley trashbag?” Sans offered with a grin, recalling the term distantly.

Flowey’s eyes widened, sputtering.

“Urgh… that’s a little too…” It seemed the harsh name had taken the little flower off guard, even though he didn’t completely deny the term.

“heheh… i dunno, i think it suits me.” He chuckled. It was an insult for sure, but he hadn’t ever recalled being particularly offended by it. Despite having been a skeleton, he had pretty thick skin.

Honestly, considering the fact that he smiled all the time, and had lived in and as a complete garbage dump, it seemed pretty fitting.

Flowey rolled his eyes, seeming exasperated and shaking his head.

“Smiley sure, but…someone like you can’t exactly be called a trashbag…despite your,” His face scrunched up as he examined sans’ clothes. (which actually weren’t the exact clothes he had worn before, but rather close approximations of them. He didn’t even want to begin to think about how and why that worked.)

“interesting fashion choices.”

He just blinked, for once uncomprehending, and it was written all over his face. What exactly did he mean by that? 

Sans thought he looked like quite the trash bag, thank you very much.

Flowey just blinked right back at him.

He was seemingly surprised for a moment, before his expression fell into tired realization, and acceptance.

“Right… lack of self-awareness, check. Gotta keep that in mind.” Sans heard him mutter. 

For once, Sans really didn’t get what Flowey was thinking.

Well…it didn’t seem terribly important, so he elected to ignore it for now.

Instead Sans decided that they should make use of the now cleared path. (Willfully ignoring the fact that it wouldn’t have mattered in face of his shortcuts anyways.)

There was a room that seemed to be away from the beaten path though, and Sans was curious. That curiosity turned into excited anticipation when his new human nose caught the scent of delicious baked goods coming from the room.

He had been able to catch scents before too, but it had been muted, and more like he was being informed of what the smell was rather than really getting to smell it.

So far, he had only gotten the pleasure of smelling leaves, bricks, and water, so he was very interested.

Not to mention…

He was hungry!

Being hungry as a human sucked way more than being hungry as a skeleton, it twisted in his stomach uncomfortably, making him feel empty inside. Normally that would be rather normal for him, but as he was now, it just felt wrong.

Therefore, his feet unconsciously carried him into the room, ignoring Flowey’s questioning voice trailing behind him.

Needless to say, he was more than a little surprised when next thing he knew, he was surrounded by little spiders who were expertly coordinating their webs to hold him in place.

“uh…”

Behind him he felt Flowey bristle, mad at both him, and the spiders.

“Ohh quit walking into trouble!!” 

The flower directed a withering glare at the spiders, and a similar but less intense glare at him. How sweet!

The spiders crowded around (Some getting in his hair and touching his skin, and oh boy did that feel weird), but they didn’t seem to be presently trying to kill him, which was part of the reason he hadn’t just escaped yet. 

Actually, they seemed to be…mugging him? No, the wasn’t quite right.

A group of spiders carried a bag that Sans could surmise was meant for money, and another spider was carrying a heavenly smelling doughnut.

Suddenly, Sans understood.

“are you guys trying to... force me to buy a pastry?” He questioned, tilting his head and likewise gently jostling a couple spiders. 

The spiders didn’t talk, nor did they have a proper face to read, but as the certified (certificate pending) people reading expert of the Underground, Sans got the gist that that had been was exactly what they were doing, judging from the way they shifted around.

Chuckling, Sans shook his head.

“you uh, really didn't need to do that. i was gonna buy some stuff anyways.”

Although the fact that they were basically still trying to initiate a transfer of goods was surprisingly upstanding of them, despite the whole mugging deal.

Guess these spiders had some integrity about their pastries.

Also, this was just a side note, but miraculously, Sans’ inventory of gold had been untouched by the…weird timeline transfer, so he had plenty of Gs to throw around however he liked.

Well, even if he didn’t have that, he had received some gold from the froggit and ghost he had battled with, so food would have been bought regardless.

Not from them, to be clear, he had just…acquired it, following the battle.

He wasn’t sure how that worked in the slightest.

He decided to dismiss it as a human thing though since Frisk had never been short of cash either despite never having stepped in the Underground prior to their adventure.

“so… uh-”

“So let him go, you stupid bugs! Ugh...and you wonder why no one buys from you…”

Flowey snapped, glaring at the whole mess of spiders with equal venom. A truly impressive feat considering the number of them.

Sans flashed a placating smile his way, and then turned back in the spider’s direction.

“well, he could be a little nicer about it, but my friend here is kinda right. you might get more business if you showed a little more…”

He glanced around at all the spiders tying him up, raising a brow.

“less threatening hospitality.” He concluded.

The spiders seemed to be listening at least, so he figured he may as well continue.

“i mean, your products clearly speak for themselves anyways. i just spidered this room over here, smelled your food, and then wanted to get some.”

The spiders collectively had the decency to seem a bit sheepish. Not that most people would have read that, but Sans managed.

Finally, they elected to let him go. The spiders jumped down from him and the webs turned slack and fell to the ground, having obviously been made of magic given they didn’t stick when the spiders didn’t want them too.

Which was great, because Sans would actually be a little sad if his hoodie got sticky webs all over it.

Then, true to his word, Sans purchased some of their goods. Three spider doughnuts, and a spider cider.

The other two were for Flowey and Toriel, of course.

Flowey muttered that they ought to give them free stuff for all this trouble, but Sans quietly disagreed.

It was always good to support independent businesses after all, even the ones that threatened you at web-point to make you buy their stuff.

...Okay well he generally wouldn’t recommend it, but it was just different standards down here.

Him and Flowey settled down to eat with the entrance to the spider’s den just near by, sitting and leaning against the wall in Sans’ case.

Flowey had initially refused the sweet treat, but with some nagging from Sans and a few well-placed puns, he eventually took it just to make him stop.

Despite his reluctance, he seemed to enjoy it.

As for Sans, although he was indeed very hungry, he did have to take a moment before deciding to eat.

So far, he had only tasted a single thing with his human faculties, and it had been a fairly bland tasting piece of licorice candy. So it was honestly a bit intimidating.

Before he could let himself hesitate some more however, his stomach again twisted into a painful reminder to just eat already.

Jeez fine!

So, with just a little pause, he took the plunge and bit down on the warm, soft pastry.

“ ...?!”

Oh. My god.

This was the best thing he had ever tasted in his life.

The dough crumbled on his tongue with a delectable and careful sweetness, but to him it was also incredibly intense.

Sans could taste things before, but much like smells, it was more like he got an impression of what it tasted like through his magical senses. 

Of course, maybe this was just the difference between monsters with tongues and monsters without, but it really felt like instead of tasting it with magic – what monsters were primarily made of – he was tasting it physically, with his body.

There was no other way of describing it. God, he had never really cared for sweet things all that much before, but now he was totally converted.

He loved it.

Flowey meanwhile, was squinting at him like one would a strange, wild creature.

“You look like you’re having a religious awakening over there.”

“i am.” Sans told him, half serious. “i’ve been converted to the church of all things sweet and tasty.”

Flowey just rolled his eyes, but he was watching him with mild interest.

“It’s kind of hard to eat when you’re being a weirdo right next to me.”

“welp, fraid’ you might starve then.”

After that thoroughly enlightening meal, he and Flowey continued forward.

There was a room full of various froggits, all wary of him, but apparently having heard that Sans was a nice human and therefore they didn’t run away. 

Sans intended on chatting with them a bit more, but he got dragged away by an exasperated Flowey by the vine, and Sans decided to forgo any resistance.

Along the way, they encountered a frantic, paranoid whimsun. Sans attempted to gently placate it, but in end the monster was only dragged into an anxiety driven, bullet-flinging fervor, unfortunately forcing Sans to just run away. There was really nothing he could do there that wouldn't just make it exponentially worse.

Flowey was at least relieved to discover that apparently Sans really did know when to quit.

In the next room, Sans happened to find a red, faded ribbon. It was armor…technically. The idea apparently was that if you looked cute, monsters wouldn’t hit you as hard.

“well, how do i look?” Sans grinned, gesturing towards the cloth he had haphazardly tied into his hair.

Flowey gave him A Look, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

“Looks dumb, its not like you need it anyways.”

“huh?”

The next series of rooms was a whole puzzle. A room turning and the switch you needed to press corresponding to the room before. 

He suspected the consequence to getting the wrong answer was death, but it didn’t matter because Sans elected to completely skip it anyways. Haha. He loved being a total cheat.

Finally, after what had felt like ages, they arrived in a large area that seemed to be much cleaner then the rest of the Ruins. It was all swept up and the walls weren't nearly as crumbly. And, it was big enough for a house.

Before he could speak up himself, Toriel spotted him from a large withered tree with a startled stand and a quickly furious glare.

Ahhh yeah she was a bit pissed.

Unfortunately, or fortunately he supposed, Flowey was not there to take some of the heat off of him, as he had absconded quickly before Toriel ever had the chance to spot him.

A smart choice.

“heheheh… hey lady, i’m back.”

Chapter Text

If someone were to ask him whether or not he was scared in this moment, Sans would say no, but…

This Toriel was seriously terrifying! Easy shortcut escape route or not. 

Thankfully Sans was an expert at hiding his own feelings, so he managed to maintain an easy going grin as he was approached by her, even giving her a friendly wave.

“I seem to recall telling you to stay. Put.” Her eyes narrowed dangerously, making him sweat.

“Did I not?”

“well sure but-”

Sans was abruptly grabbed by the arm, now being pulled in the direction of what he knew was Toriel’s home. It had startled him, and he had to try really hard to not shortcut out of her grasp.

Ah, had his scheduled maiming come so soon?

“No buts.” She glared at him, and Sans could tell that she was pretty angry at him. 

Well…he could also tell that it had its roots in concern, but given Sans was completely fine he thought it was a tad unnecessary.

“i’m, uh, totally fine though, you know. most of the monsters just leafed me alone.”

With of course some small exceptions in Froggits, Whimsuns, pastry bearing spiders, and a teary-eyed ghost.

But they were only minor deadly encounters, surely.

Sans couldn’t see the woman’s face, so he couldn’t gauge her reaction very well, but hopefully a joke or two would grant him a little breathing room.

But, at least in this particular moment, it did not.

Sans couldn’t help but let out an exasperated sigh as he was dragged right into her house, which was still pretty homey all things considered, if rather lonely.

He was still pretty certain that she wouldn’t cause him serious harm without appropriate cause, but she was still a very strict and intimidating lady. Oh well, he had dug his own grave here, Flowey had even warned him.

Together they stopped in front of a bedroom door. Somehow this scenario felt kind of familiar, except this time he was being dragged by the elbow instead of gently led by the hand. She turned to him with a stern face, it wasn’t as bad as before, but it still was an expression that brooked no argument.

“Since you apparently cannot stop yourself from getting into trouble without my direct supervision, you will remain here while I finish. Do not leave.” She told him coldly.

Sans couldn’t help the grin that widened just slightly, as he glanced up at her with a quirk to his brow.

“so i’m grounded then?” He asked dryly.

 He really was getting the children’s treatment here. Clearly she felt that he couldn’t be left alone without somehow walking straight into the jaws of death like he had his eyes closed. Somehow he thought she and Flowey were kind of similar.

Peering down at him, Toriel sneered.

“Yes.” She replied, to which Sans sighed and drooped with a small touch of dramatism.

“man, and here i thought adult life would be different.” 

Sans then winked at her.

“guess they don’t call it the underground for no reason.”

Finally Sans had managed to extract a bit of less mean-spirited mirth from her, even though she tried to hide it.

Toriel let out a deep sigh before finally releasing his arm. Of course, he knew better than to try and run away.

“I will make sure to bring you food shortly, so just wait here.”

Sans shrugged in vague agreement, since it wasn’t like he had a choice anyways.

Well, technically he could just...leave. Leave the Ruins without Toriel having any chance at stopping him but…

He already knew that just wasn’t an option, not if he wanted a good ending.

Right before he was pushed inside, however, Sans remembered something.
 
He pulled out his other spider donut, proceeding to offer it to a confused and dumbfounded Toriel.

“actually, i was able to pick up some of these on my way, so i’m not as hungry, and i also picked one up for you.”

Sans watched with amusement as her jaw dropped just slightly outside of her will, before she quickly closed it again. The boss monster pressed a hand on her forehead and sighed.

“I…Well, I suppose I am glad you were able to get something to eat, but I do not need it, save it for yourself.”

Her face morphed into a weird sort of gratitude, as if she could barely remember what it felt like.

“However…the thought is appreciated.”

Toriel seemed to have finally stopped looking at him like he was some bug on her shoe (not that she had ever worn shoes a day in her life), so he thought maybe he could try his luck and not get grounded.

“...can i not be grounded then?” He asked, entirely straightforward.

The lady flashed him a deceptively sweet smile, leaning forward on her knees slightly which caused him to back up towards the door just a tad.

“No.”

And with that, Sans was shut into the bedroom.

Well…it had been worth a shot. She had even locked the door. He discovered this after giving it a brief and halfhearted wiggle.

Man this lady really liked making him feel like a kid, despite the fact that he was a grown monster.

…Human. Was he ever going to get used to that? Probably not, he thought.

With an exasperated shake of his head, Sans glanced around the room he now occupied for the time being.

It was obviously a children’s bedroom, despite being a tad bare. It didn’t look like it had been used much, but it was still maintained to an acceptable level. Actually, it kind of seemed like it had been cleaned and dusted extremely recently.

Therefore, Sans felt comfortable sitting on the bed, pleasantly surprised at just how soft and squishy it was. It depressed under his weight far more than it ever did as a skeleton, which was a clear testament to all the weight he had gained.

Apparently being made of primarily water and physical matter really made you put on the pounds. 

It was kind of weird to think about though so he pushed the thought out of his mind and leaned backwards.

Before long, Sans was completely laying on the bed, and wow was it making him sleepy.

He felt like he had done more work today than he ever had in his entire life. Even though that definitely wasn’t true, during the more recent years maybe…

Ah, no, he supposed fighting the human in that judgment hall kind of took the cake on this one. That was something that he still remembered quite clearly, it really hadn’t been that long since then.

It felt like forever, sure, but he had still technically only been here for most likely less than an hour.

God he was tired…and this bed was so comfortable…

And so, before he knew it Sans had drifted off into the soft and fluffy arms of sleep.

Sans really hadn’t planned on falling asleep, but given he was unbelievably tired, stuck in this room (sort of), and had quite the journey ahead of him, it probably wasn’t a bad thing. 

When he woke up, his brain took quite some time to catch up with the ridiculous situation he had currently found himself in, and all these human features were causing quite a bit of sleep-riddled confusion.

It didn’t help that he had also had a dream. 

It didn’t feel like it had come from his own perspective, but rather someone else…someone who had also been looking at him, his brother, his friends…so many of these circumstances felt so familiar, and yet….

He had been purposefully ignoring it so far… but there were so many weird instances of half remembering so many things lately. Feelings of expectation, specific intuition, things that felt familiar that shouldn’t. Remembering small key phrases, even though he was sure he hadn’t said them…not in this timeline.

Everything was leading him to an uncomfortable conclusion.

That this soul held more than just determination alone. That it also held the remaining feelings and fragments of Frisk’s memory.

Maybe even more than that, he had no way of knowing.

He really wasn’t a fan honestly.

He wanted to be done with that arrogant human, he didn’t want to think about them anymore, he didn’t want any part of them in his soul.

But…

In the end, he was here, living, because of their soul. There was no getting around it, and he doubted an extraction would go over well. It seemed that he was well and truly stuck with them. At the very least, the extra information was kind of helpful sometimes. And pretty much all of the fragments he got were limited to feelings and intuition, not very many.

Plus, he recalled much more about previous timelines than he ever had before, which was an admittedly rather nice thing to have, even if it was a double edged sword.

Even if some of the memories sucked, Sans decided that he felt better having them anyways. More complete.

And it gave him more information to predict future events from, even if he didn’t have any memories of a weird alternate reality Underground where everything was terrible of course.

All that was nice and fresh, unfortunately.

So…fine Frisk. Just don’t ruin this world too.

It really can’t take much more anyways.

All this thinking about his weird human soul got him feeling like he wanted to check on it, just in case anything was wrong with it. You could never be too careful when it came to unprecedented soul science.

Lethargically sitting up in bed, Sans proceeded to tug his soul out of his chest.

…

Oh.

Ok.

This is fine.

Unbelievably, it had changed. It had actually, seriously changed.

Not that much, to be fair, but any change involving his soul was cause for alarm he thought, and alarmed he was.

Just slightly, his original white soul was rotated upwards, making the whole image weirdly asymmetrical. 

He had no idea why it had decided to do this. He could probably get more satisfying answers had he the equipment to study it properly, but at the moment that just wasn’t happening.

The only thing he could think of, was that perhaps it was unnatural for souls to be together but entirely unmerged like this. He wouldn’t be very surprised, since that definitely seemed incredibly unnatural from what he knew about souls (which was quite a lot actually), and also just…instinctually. 

And because of this, it was slowly righting itself. Frankly it was weird that they were apart at all in the first place, when monsters took hold of a human’s soul, it was supposed to merge rather immediately. Was it related to the sudden universe transfer? Why had he been the one to “fall down?”

Maybe it was related to a different development, maybe it was both. Frustratingly, he just couldn’t say; there were so many unanswered questions that the long lost scientific part of him was dying to answer. And honestly he’d really like to know what was up with his soul anyways…just in general.

Man, could the universe quit finding reasons to mess around with the very culmination of his being please? The poor thing had been through enough.

So far though…well he felt pretty much just as he had earlier. He figured he could sit on this for a little while longer.

Sans clearly had more important things to worry about, such as the absolutely heavenly smell coming from near the floor of the room. 

To his delight, a piece of butterscotch cinnamon pie was sitting innocently on the floor, ready and waiting to be eaten. 

And Sans would gladly oblige.

Maybe it would have been smarter to save it, since the single slice of pie literally maxed out your HP, but Sans was still kind of hungry, especially after sleeping. Plus, it would be a terrible waste to let it get too cold.

Therefore, he quickly found himself scrambling out of the bed with zero grace, sitting on the floor next to the pie. It occurred to Sans that all he had eaten so far were sugary pastries, but honestly he couldn’t care less.

“what the heck…this is so freaking good…” 

He felt like he was gonna cry here; had Tori’s pie tasted this good too...? The spider donuts had been great, but nothing really compared to the pie made from that pun loving furry boss monster, no matter what version of her it was.

It was gone far too fast, but Sans reluctantly figured that he should probably stop hanging out here doing nothing now. He didn’t want Toriel to know that he had somehow escaped the room, but popping out really quick to check on his pal and figure out a game plan seemed like a pretty good idea. 

He supposed he didn’t have to continue to involve Flowey, but…well, company was nice either way. Some of his returning memories from way back when kind of conflicted with his feelings on that front. But although some of them creeped through they were quite a long time ago, and therefore the haziest out of all of them. Plus, he’d spent a fair amount of time with this Flowey, and it was obvious to him that they were very different, even if similar in many ways.

Considering all that, Sans tip-toed towards the door, and after giving the door a quick listen just to make sure she wasn’t actually coming right this moment, Sans took a shortcut near the side of her house. 

Before he walked through, he checked to make sure she wasn’t also spontaneously just hanging out here in the garden. She was not. The only thing he saw were a collection of pots in varying conditions and on the edge of his magical senses, a familiar soulless monster.
That’d make things quick.

Shortly after Sans popped into existence outside, Flowey popped his head from the floor.

“Howdy, you’re not hurt are you?” Flowey asked with concern, obviously worried about Sans getting roughly dragged inside Toriel’s house, despite the fact that he could make his grand escape if things got really rough. Flowey was totally a worrier.

“yep, all good. just, heh…well me and you got to have something in common for a little while.”

Flowey squinted at him while he tried to understand what Sans was getting at, before his face changed into a happy-horrified type expression.

“You were grounded?”

Sans rolled his eyes, undeniably amused.

“yep.” 

Flowey looked like he wasn’t sure whether or not to be annoyed at that or laugh. Eventually it seemed like he had just given up, shaking his head and dismissing it.

“Well…whatever, it’s not like it matters to a cheat like you.” Flowey glanced around warily, then pointedly back at him.

“Shouldn’t we leave now? The exit to the Ruins is in her basement, you can just take a shortcut through, can’t you?”

Sans tilted his head, checking. He didn’t think he could, he had never actually physically been there, and it wasn’t directly visible. Maybe he could if he concentrated on its exact relative location from him, but…

He didn’t want to leave like that anyways.

“i can’t. besides, i don’t want to just leave without saying anything to her.”

Flowey looked at him like he was crazy, irritated and rather confused. 

“What?! Why not? She’ll just try and stop you from leaving, with force. She doesn’t deserve anything from you!”

Sans couldn't help a sigh at that, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to think of a reason to justify himself. 

“i mean, she did help me through the ruins and give me some food. that’s not why i don’t wanna leave like that though…”

Flowey crossed his leaves in an exasperated gesture, impatient but at the very least listening.

“Then why?”

Crossing his arms, Sans closed his eyes and tried to put it into words.

“i just feel like we’ll get a better ending if we don’t just avoid killing anyone, but if we try and help them, too.”

Flowey mustered a sharp glare right at him, and it might have been intimidating were he not Sans and also didn’t already know Flowey wouldn’t actually hurt him.

“A better ending…? Is this a game to you?” He hissed.

In an immediate response, Sans leveled Flowey with an even and resolute stare, enough that his words could never be in question.

“No.”

The flower backed off slightly at that, now looking more irate than anything, and waited for him to provide some more justification.

Honestly, the whole thing about helping other monsters, not just leaving them unharmed, was partly just his human intuition creeping it’s head up, but it was also from his own personal intuition.

The story here would not end peacefully just by releasing the barrier. It was an odd thought for Sans, who never got to be on the surface long enough for it to matter, but just releasing monsters wasn’t the stopping point. There was a whole life to deal with after that.

“i don’t want to get out of here without doing a thing…I guess”

To achieve something good, something peaceful, something that stuck out in his memories as the best possible timeline; monsters needed to change.

Of course, Sans wasn’t so arrogant to believe that he could just change the whole direction of every single monster’s life within a single encounter, but it’d be nice if he could at least invite the possibility to change, despite the fact that it was an awfully tall order for him. Frankly he would begin to lose heart if he thought about it too long so he ignored it.

Sometimes it’s hard to make a difference in your life when everything is encouraging the opposite. 

At the very least, he wanted to help the people he had considered friends. And leaving without a word to this Toriel, without any sort of confrontation, and without any kind of closure…Well…it was just too depressing of a thought, right? It felt wrong.

Even if she tried to keep him here by force, he’d just have to take it as it came.

That was what he thought.

Seriously, when did he get so magnanimous? Mostly, he just wanted to finally achieve the ending he had always wanted, if not in his own world then in this one.

That’s all he had ever wanted for a while. He couldn’t go back, not to them, and not to his Underground which was probably now shattered across time and space, so he really wanted this at the very least.

Just his luck that the Underground he ended up in would take the most effort to change.

“monsters can change. but nothing will happen if no one tries.”

Sans glanced off to the side in the relative direction of Toriel, contemplative.

“and it just feels wrong to leave like this, after everything. she deserves to be happy too, don’t ya think?”

Flowey drooped slightly, gaze hazy as if remembering something incredibly nice, but painfully nostalgic…somehow, there was also a strong sense of bitterness there too. Sans decided to take that as a form of agreement.

Sans smiled genuinely at the flower, some distant part of his mind still reeling at the kindness he was sharing with Flowey of all people, but he didn’t think it was a bad thing.

He extended his hand towards him in offering. Flowey was an important part of the Underground too, after all.

“that’s just what i believe. i really think things will turn out better this way, even though i’m uh… well aware that it sounds really dumb.”

Flowey raised a brow slightly as if to signify that he definitely thought so, but it wasn’t as dismissive.

“that’s the way i’m gonna do things. if you wanna come…well, i mean, i guess you don’t have to if you don’t want. i know it’s kind crazy and it might be kinda dangerous so-”

He was interrupted by a loud, haughty scoff, and Sans felt a cool leaf touch his hand.

“Don’t be stupid, idiot…I already told you, I’m coming with.” He said with an air that brooked no argument, like it was obvious.

“You’d definitely get yourself into trouble otherwise! Probably trying to help some monster that doesn’t deserve it…”

Sans blinked in mild surprise, but Flowey continued with an exasperated sigh, looking away from him.

“You insist on being the better person in every encounter, regardless of the danger!”

He had the face of someone being unbearably inconvenienced, but went along with it willingly anyways. Undoubtedly, Flowey was quickly solidifying himself as the tsundere mom friend.

“Ugh, somebody needs to watch your back and make sure you don’t do anything too stupid.”

Sans found himself grinning widely, probably looking kind of dumb.

“heheheh, well, if you insist.”

The only reply he got was a massive eye roll.

Sans was admittedly rather glad that it was settled, and also that Flowey was determined to stick around. The little flower wasn’t a bad travel partner, and probably had a lot of personal experience with things all over the Underground here.

Aside from that, he was wary in all the places Sans was not. For all of his sneakiness, his old Underground was a very peaceful place, and people were generally good. Sans wasn’t exactly great with the concept that for every monster he met, caution was the better and safer response.

Which was part of why Flowey was the perfect partner to have in the Underground, he could just do all that prickly wariness for him.

Sans loved shoving jobs off to other people.

Although, now that Sans was considering the idea that Flowey would definitely be sticking around for the foreseeable future, him remaining stuck to the ground would be…inconvenient. He wouldn’t be able to take him in shortcuts, and although Flowey was quick and creative with how he popped up from the ground, sometimes it just wasn’t enough to go certain places. 

Notably, inside buildings were a problem. 

Plus…it was probably very cold in snowdin for a flower.

Looking around, Sans found the solution quite quickly. 

“if we’re going to be leaving, why not use one of those?”

Flowey turned in the direction he was pointing, face scrunching up instantly when he saw what it was.

Out here in the garden there were a number of flower pots, even though they seemed to have not been used in a long time.

“Seriously? A flower pot?”

Sans huffed out a bit of laughter at the utterly offended look on Flowey’s face, clearly not huge on the idea of being contained to a flower pot when he was very much not a regular flower.

Although he couldn’t help his grin, Sans also shrugged helplessly.

“well, i can’t take you through shortcuts like this, and uh. you’ll have a hard time getting through Toriel’s house..” Sans reasoned. 

Flowey turned up his nose, even more offended.

“I could make it through! Don’t underestimate me…but…ugh, I guess not being able to go through those shortcuts is a little…”

Flowey seemed to be considering it, even if he didn’t like it.

“...Fine. I’ll do it. But do not let anyone else hold me, you hear?”

Sans agreed to these terms, of course.

“and before we leave, i want to talk to Toriel some more.”

Flowey raised a skeptical brow, but in the end he was starting to get used to Sans’ weird choices.

“...I’m not even going to ask why, whatever, do what you want.”

“heheh…thanks. in the meantime, you can pick out which pot you wanna use.”

Flowey’s face told him that he still wasn’t entirely pleased about that, but made no argument.

“we might need to leave quick, depending on how things go, so just be ready.”

After that, Sans figured he had been out here long enough, he really didn’t want to be missing from the room when Toriel went to check on him.

When he stepped back through, things weren’t changed at all, so he was thankfully in the clear.

Now, would she finally let him out?

Conveniently, he began to hear her footsteps from beyond the door. It was convenient, sure, but it also seemed that he had cut it rather close.

…Oh well, things worked out.

Sans knocked on the door just in case, but it seemed like she had already been intending on opening his room. He barely got to make a single noise before the door abruptly opened, showing him a stern, but significantly less angry Toriel compared to before.

“oh hey, funny meeting you, come here often?” He grinned up at her, the face of casualness and definitely not having been chatting it up with his old flower pal just a minute earlier.

Toriel simply sighed, gently pushing him to the side and walking inside to pick up his empty plate and fork.

“...Generally, I do not.” She said without looking at him. It was said with a just slightly too easy-going voice. It felt a bit like Tori when she was thinking about the other humans she had taken care of, but with its more than fair share of bitterness. This memory of Tori was one that came unbidden, but it wasn’t as startling or uncomfortable as some of the recollections he had gotten lately. It was more like being reminded of a hazy memory.

“well, it looks pretty spiffy.” Sans hummed, giving the room another brief glance as he said so. He could easily imagine the same soom dusty and untouched, which was most likely its usual state.

Toriel didn’t seem to react all that much, but after a moment she simply said,

“Indeed.”

After that Toriel turned around with the empty plate, expressing her usual glower, and it was a face Sans was slowly getting used to. The lady indicated with her glare to follow, and Sans did so with a shrug and without a word. She took them into the hall, and the living room. They were both places Sans had seen but was only offered a quick glance as he was dragged into the bedroom previously. 

It was rather strange actually, he had memories of this place, but he couldn’t decide if they were his from a different timeline or Frisk’s, and it was kind of giving him a headache. Instead, he focused on the differences instead. Picture frames were laid down and unable to be seen, there were scratches on the walls that kind of seemed like they were produced by horns and claws. The most notable difference was many of the various red and black accents. There weren’t too many, but Sans was beginning to wonder if this world had some sort of colour scheme. 

The living room was much like how he had remembered it though, if a bit…more somber, less homely. He felt like he was going to get exponential depression if he stayed here, which was really something he didn’t need, thank you very much.

All that being said, the dining room and kitchen were a bit nicer, even if the pot in the middle of the table only had dark branches and red leaves.

Toriel motioned for him to sit down and went into the kitchen without saying much of anything, but she came back shortly with some tea that seemed prepared in advance. 

“Here.” She said simply, setting the hot cup of tea in front of him, but she didn’t get any for herself. The tea was made up of those same red leaves as well as some golden petals.

He glanced up from it, wondering if she was going to say anything, but she was silent. So, Sans carefully brought the glass up to his mouth in the meantime. This was the second thing he had drank since he got here, and it was also the only warm beverage. From what he could tell, it was more bitter than golden flower tea, and Sans really thought it could use a hefty helping of sugar. Although perhaps that was his recent bias for sweet things talking. 

He didn’t want to be rude though, so he simply continued to take small sips and let the warmth go down his throat and body in a way he had never experienced before.

But uh…it was getting kind of awkward now, so he drank slowly. Again he glanced up at Toriel, but this time she seemed more lost in thought than anything. He hadn’t really wanted to be the one to really start a conversation, but oh well…

“hey, uh, Tori- Toriel. don’t mean to bother you, but mind telling me a bit about this place?”

It felt weird to be asking about the Underground, but her answer still may provide something valuable. 

Quickly she was snapped from her daze, eyes sharp again.

“You wish to know about this place…? Hmph. Well, I suppose that is fair, seeing as you will be staying here for the foreseeable future.”

He didn’t want to just outright correct her right now, so he just shrugged.

“This place…ahem, this area specifically is the Ruins. It is my domain, and it is the safest place for you.” She said simply, appearing to hesitate to elaborate.

“and uh…the rest of it?”

Toriel scowled, but reluctantly continued. “Beyond this place is Snowdin, along with various other areas. They are all filled with predatory monsters, who would love to feast on your human soul.” 

She said this incredibly threatening thing with a bright but venomous smile on her face. 

“huh… neat.” He probably wasn’t going to get very far here, but it wasn’t like this was essential information. 

“so…why do all these monsters want me dead, anyways? i mean…you don’t.” He paused and considered her, a light grin tugging at the corning of his mouth.

“presumably.” 

He could sense a small smile underneath her scowl, and shook her head.

“Perhaps you did not think anything about it on the surface, however…” She looked pointedly at his chest, where his weird human monster hybrid soul lie, and it had him instinctively raising his hand to cover it.

“A human soul is...a highly sought after resource down here. You would do well to keep it close to you.”

He grinned, although a bit unsettled. He kind of felt bad for Frisk. At least, he kind of did; murdering his friends and family a crap ton kind of left his sympathy out to dry a tad.

“yep… don’t worry, i was already plannin’ on it. i mean…i probably soulden’t take my soul too far out of my body anyways.”

That got a breathy chuckle out of the lady, her intense eyes softening just a tad. He tilted his head, wondering if this Toriel liked jokes as much as his did. If she did, he wondered why she would subdue her reactions so much. Or maybe she was simply like that.

“you’re really into terrible jokes huh?” He just narrowly resisted making a skeleton pun out of that, all at once feeling a sense of sorrow at not being able to make those so easy any more. He should think of some human specific puns, even if they sounded significantly less interesting.

The lady’s face twitched, perhaps a little taken aback by him noticing. Sans thought it was fairly obvious though.

“Hm… well…” She trailed off. Sans simply grinned.

“seems like things could be better down here, and dumb jokes really take the edge off, don’t they? that’s what i’ve always done.”

That’s what people had always done in the Underground; try and make light of their problems. He wondered if this population of monsters had a very different reaction, or if it was caused by something else.

Toriel sighed, smiling ruefully as she stared off into the distance.

“I suppose it does.” She admitted.

Sans was glad he had gotten her to admit that at least, but then another thing occurred to him.

“oh hey, by the way, that pie was crazy good. pretty much the best thing i’ve ever had.” 

Not that the list had much competition. He couldn’t really say with other foods right now until he got the chance to try them. But he was confident that the butterscotch pie would remain high on his list for a long time to come.

Toriel blinked in surprise at the sudden praise, eyebrows shooting up. Her eyes also seemed to waver, shoulders stiffening. He wasn’t sure why that was exactly.

“I…thank you, child.”

Sans rolled his eyes good-naturedly, even if being referred to as a child wasn’t high on his likes.

“not a kid, lady.” 

Toriel seemed momentarily ashamed and mad at herself, but it was only for a split second before she quickly schooled her expression again.

“Right. My apologies.” She said normally enough, although a bit stiff. He wondered if she had said that instinctively, more so than actually viewing him as a child.

As Sans finally finished his tea, he saw Toriel shake her head slightly, perhaps to try and clear her head. Quickly however, he found himself being glared at all of a sudden. He stiffened just a little, but then noticed that it was more like she was glaring at something just above him, more than at him. He couldn’t help it and turned around to see if there was anything there, but it was nothing.

When Sans turned back around, he found a Toriel close to his face, leaning over and picking something off his head. When she retracted his hand, he saw that it was a leaf.

“oh, is that what you were looking at? yeah, didn’t have a clean fall i guess.” He shrugged, entirely unconcerned. She scoffed at him with her nose turned up.

“It is not just that, your hair is a mess. I have a hard time believing the fall could have created something quite like this…do you even comb your hair?” She scowled at him, and somehow he felt just a little chastised despite everything. He had actually owned a comb before, but well, it was mostly for decoration. 

“uh, yeah sure.” 

The only thing he got was a stronger glare to his unconvincing response.

Before he knew it she had gotten up from her chair and over to his side, hauling him out of his seat tragically. It kind of hurt, actually. Well even if he was a human, he was still small and fragile it would seem, and Toriel was very big and very strong.

He got dragged into the kitchen where the lighting was better, and a chair from the dining table trailing behind, which he was subsequently plopped into. Along the way, he spotted the rest of the cinnamon butterscotch pie. It had been a while since it was made, but it still gave the room a pleasant scent.

“ya know…you can just ask me to move.”

“Hmph, why would I? Asking you to move requires much more energy than simply moving you myself.”

Unfortunately it would seem that was the case. He probably felt like a feather in her hands, one made of glass.

He watched her open a drawer, a distant expression drifting across briefly before she quickly grabbed out a nice looking but somewhat dusty wooden comb. A strong blow from Toriel took care of that dust problem nice and easy, however.

If he had to guess, she was planning on trying to fix his hair. Which was honestly great because he definitely didn’t want to do it himself. Hair really seemed like so much work, maybe it would be easier to just cut it all off.

Toriel removed the goggles he forgot he was wearing and almost seemed like she was going to start before she froze. Sans glanced over, and after tracing her gaze, it seemed that she was staring at the red ribbon that he had also forgotten he had put there. She probably only just noticed it since it was tied into such a mess.

“That’s…where did you get that?” She asked him sharply.

He simply shrugged, scratching his cheek.

“uhh i just found it while i was walking around earlier. should i not have taken it?”

Actually, where did this thing come from exactly? 

Toriel studied his expression closely, before sighing deeply.

“No…No, you may keep it. Treat it well.” She replied slowly, carefully removing the ribbon he had haphazardly put there.

When she finally started, Sans immediately took back everything he was thinking about cutting it all off, it honestly felt heavenly when someone combed your hair apparently. And he didn’t even have to do a thing, it was amazing. That being said, he’d have to find someone to do it for him. He supposed he could technically do it with some liberal applications of blue magic, but he really felt like that was defeating the point; he still had to do work, even if using magic was about 10x more appealing than most physical activities.

As the lady went, she picked out leaves, sticks, and dirt; all things he had missed when he had sloppily brushed through it before. It was very pleasant and it was definitely nice to relax, but at some point Toriel’s hands slowed, and eventually, they stopped. Sans glanced behind him to see the lady in question with a far off and stricken look on her face, as if remembering a painful and somber memory. He wondered if he should snap her out of it, and eventually decided yes when nothing happened even when he waited.

“um, lady?”

Immediately, she whipped her head in his direction and snapped back to reality. A mix of emotions passed by her face, the most prominent he thought, was guilt.

“I…My apologies.” She said quietly, face still pained and displeased, but it was clear she was trying to hide it. Not that it really worked against Sans. He wondered how he should broach this…well, simple was usually best, right?

“were you reminded of something?”

Toriel closed her eyes. 

For a while Sans was convinced she would clam up and refuse to say a thing. However, after some time lost in thought, she finally spoke.

“I was reminded of another human, who fell down here long ago…your’s is white, but the hair is…somewhat similar.”

She sighed, scowling and staring down the comb that still lay in her large hands. It seemed like an awfully small comb for a big monster like Toriel to have. It was either a comb brought by the human themselves, or a comb made to order down here.

Her face shifted into a stoic expression, though not for a lack of painful feelings Sans would guess.

“But they are dead now.” She said tonelessly. “And all that is left is a foolish old woman.”

Most likely she was talking about the human kid the king and queen had adopted all those years ago. He had never personally met them of course since he wasn’t that old, so he didn’t have many ideas for how they may be in this world.
 
From her voice and her expression, he could gather that it was a conflicted subject for the woman. He knew that the king and queen had loved that human child unconditionally, and treated them well. He didn’t know how things turned out here, and therefore it was hard to make any accurate assumptions about the circumstances. Either way, the biggest thing he could see on her face was…

Regret. A lot of it. And anger, of course.

“i’m sorry to hear that.” He responded genuinely, it was only the nice thing to do, after all.

And although it was indeed only the nice thing to do, she still seemed taken aback; was a little kindness really that hard to find down here?

Ultimately, she said nothing and simply forced his head back around with her hands and finished what she started. 

It was really over all too soon, such a shame.

However, by the end of it his human hair was looking pretty neat. Or at least he thought so, the way Toriel’s nose scrunched up when she looked at it suggested that it was actually still rather messy. But as of now, there wasn’t much to be done.

She put his goggles back where they belonged, and even tied the red ribbon back into his hair much more neatly then he had. It hadn’t exactly occurred to him to put that back, but he certainly wasn’t going to go out of his way to take it out, so sure.

Afterwards, Sans caught her staring at the comb in her hand again with a clouded expression, and he wondered what exactly she may be thinking about, something about that human undoubtedly.

To his surprise, he then found the comb being offered in his direction.

“Here. You may as well keep this with you; do not lose it.”

He was more than a little surprised to be receiving it, although it was admittedly more useful then he would have ever found it as a skeleton, in which it would only be used as a one off gag. He tilted his head up at her, questioning, but trying to not seem ungrateful.

“uh, are you sure? this is…” Well he wasn’t entirely sure what it was, but it was obviously a comb that brought Toriel painful, but important memories. The only thing he got in response was a tilt of her nose, dismissing it.

“Hmph, it no longer has any use except for you, that is why you may have it.”

Sans considered her for a moment, before his grin widened.

“well, thanks then. heh, i could hairdly imagine misplacing something like this. and if i do, i’ll make sure to comb through every inch of my inventory.”

Satisfyingly enough, that got a certified snort out of her.

Once she was done, he was hauled out of the chair yet again, and although he was rather tired of being pulled around already, he still made no protest.

They eventually arrived back in the living room, where the fireplace was burning and a lone chair with a red blanket laid over top sat.

Toriel released him, and sat down at said chair, pulling out a book from the nearby bookcase as she did so. She glanced at him, standing somewhat aimlessly in the middle of the room

“Hmph, we will have to find you something to do here, I would not like you to bum around my house doing nothing forever…” She murmured, rambling onwards about various things she had planned now that he was here. It was obvious to him that for all her coldness, she was awfully lonely. Not that anyone was unjustified in avoiding her.

And uncomfortably, Sans realized that this was the time that he would have to bring up actually…leaving. He wasn’t looking forward to it, but with a bit of determination, he finally broached the subject.

“uh by that, do you mean you want me to stay here? Forever?”

Immediately, her eyes narrowed dangerously at him, reminding him all over that her LV was unlikely to be 1.

He was focused, so his human face didn’t provide a strong reaction. Normally it would be easy peasy to not make any expression on his skull, but being a human made things quite a bit more difficult on that front.

“Obviously. Where else do you expect to go?” She asked him with venom in her voice, proactively discouraging him from inquiring any further. Not that it worked on him.

“well… there are other places out there right? like waterfall, or hotland”

Her glare intensified two-fold, and she quickly stood up from her seat, full height bearing down on him even when they were a fair distance apart. He had mentioned two places that Toirel hadn't even mentioned.

“Ugh, I bet that wretched Flower put those stupid ideas on your head! I should have killed him while I had the chance.” The lady spat.

Sans actively frowned at that, admittedly more off-put by Toriel saying that about Flowey then he thought he would be. An odd feeling tugged at him at how…tragic it was, even though he didn’t know why.

“uh, you don’t have to go that far you know…and that’s not exactly why, I appreciate your help, I just want to leave.”

It was certainly true however that Sans wanted to leave of his own accord. And although he said as much, it didn’t appear she was listening.

Her eyes told him all he needed to know about her righteous fury right now.

“Enough, no more humans will be leaving this place, and I will make sure of it.”

And with that, she stormed off. Sans got the feeling that it was probably to the basement, to destroy the exit to the Ruins. Nevermind how he knew that exactly, he just didn’t like to think about it too hard. Either way, he should probably get a move on before she does that.

Immediately, he took a shortcut outside exactly where he sensed Flowey to be, a Flowey that was already situated comfortably in the nicest flower pot there, even if his face was bored and displeased. When he popped up next to him though, the flower startled so much he nearly knocked the whole thing over.

“Hey!! Give a little warning!” he sputtered, glaring at Sans.

“heh, sorry, we kinda gotta go quickly before she destroys the door preferably.”

“WHAT.”

“like i said, let’s go.”

He quickly snatched Flowey up and shortcut back inside. However, the slight smell of pie distracted him momentarily…

Instead of going down the stairs immediately, Sans instead popped into the kitchen and took the rest of the butterscotch pie instead.

Instantaneously, he was met with a dead eyed stare.

“Really.”

“heh…gotta take some for the road right? these give max hp you know.”

The flower merely gave him the equivalent of a facepalm, and crossed his leaves.

“Let’s just go, we’re hurrying remember?”

Grinning, Sans shrugged and stepped through yet another shortcut to catch up with a lonely, destructive old woman.

Chapter Text

Clutching Flowey’s pot with both hands, Sans found himself a fair distance behind Toriel, who stood in front of the Ruins door. In the back of his mind — or rather, his soul— it was nostalgic.

Even from this distance he could see her hunched shoulders, and the burning wisps of flame that emanated from her fingers. In a small panic, Sans realized she was close to obliterating the area and so hastily ran forward and shouted at her,

“WAIT!!”

The voice startled both her, and himself. Sans couldn’t even remember the last time he truly raised his voice.

Both he and Toriel found themselves at an awkward and tense standstill, given he wasn’t entirely sure what the game plan was after this, and probably because she was shocked to see him down here holding a sentient flower in a pot.

Soon enough she regained her bearings however, and turned around to face them fully with an intense and fiery expression on her face. When Toriel’s yellow tinted eyes trailed down sharply to look at the flower in his hands, that natural glare of hers increased ten-fold.

“You. ” She growled, in such a hateful way that Sans wanted to hide Flowey behind his back. It was just wrong for her of all people to look at him like that, he felt. However, he refrained, and glanced down to see Flowey glare back at her, although not nearly as intensely. Still, he could sense the lingering animosity there.

“You useless weed, you’re always such a thorn in my side!” Sans’ face twitched at the most likely unintentional joke despite everything. 

“Always thinking you’re the good guy!”

Sans saw her furious face twist into a gleefully poisonous smile, tinged with its own fair share of mania.

“Even though you’ve never been able to protect a single thing. ”

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Flowey wilt and begin shaking like a leaf.

Wow, look at this situation, Sans really wanted to go home…

 But that wasn’t an option. So instead, he carefully set Flowey down on the ground behind some non-visible blue magic to keep any stray moving attacks at bay, and took a deep breath.

“ah. i just remembered i forgot to save.”

Funnily enough, that immediately reinvigorated the droopy flower to give him an incredulous,

“WHAT?! ” 

“it’s fine, don’t worry about it. i just won’t die.” He merely received a baffled stare back, to which Sans replied with a cheeky but reassuring grin.

“i won’t die, trust me.”

Not that he’d be totally screwed if he did, he’d just have to go through a long series of events all over again. Which would suck. Besides, he was kind of feeling like he wanted to go through a deathless run here, no doubt a daunting task for an Underground with a pacifist run locked in hard mode. And dying just…didn’t sound fun, coming back or not. He still didn’t trust those save points.

Before anything though, he’d really like to try and talk things out first. Not that he was especially confident it would work, but you had to stick to your principles.

Toriel finally focused her gaze on him, an intense variation of a stare that he felt was much like a mother trying to make her kid go to their room. Awkwardly, he put a hand on the back of his head and plainly inquired,

“any chance you’ll just let us pass easy peazy?” 

She snorted in an obvious dismissal, looking down on him.

“You are a foolish human, you don’t seem to fully understand what lies beyond this place.”

Her fists clenched tightly as her eyes narrowed.

“He, Asgore…will take your soul. And every monster you meet will want you dead. And what, you expect me to believe you can handle it with your pathetic, pacifistic fists? Don’t make me laugh. ”

Well, he could understand her skepticism here at the very least; it’s not like she knew he was actually a former monster with cheaty magic and save points for good measure. And hopefully she would never know that.

Her gaze flitted back towards Flowey for a moment as she sneered.

“Hmph, and it’s not as if that weed will be able to protect you, either.” Shaking her head, she focused on him again, now looking somewhat desperate.

“You do not need to go anywhere, I will take care of you. You will not die, there’s no point trying to go through there in vain!”

He could clearly see the loneliness etched into her expression, but he didn’t think she was aware of it. Part of her desperation to keep him here was most likely in large part for her, more than it was for him. The only thing he could do was sigh and shake his head.

“i’m sorry, but that’s just not going to happen. i know it may seem hard to believe, but i’m pretty confident i can take care of myself, murderous monsters or no.”

He could tell that she didn’t believe him for a second as she turned up her nose and scoffed. Suddenly, her hands flared up once again with an intense flame, a grin twisting itself upwards on her face.

“if you are so confident, then kill me, and make it past here.”

Sans fought back a flinch at her provocation, disturbed even by the idea. In no world did he ever want to kill Toriel, or anyone really. Even when he fought the human, he hated killing them. And he hated the blood the most.

“i’m not going to kill you.” He said firmly, shaking his head. “but even so, i’m leaving.”

She turned a vicious glare towards him for the easy admission of Mercy, disgusted.

“Without the intent to kill, the courage, you will merely be free EXP .” She hissed, turning his expression into a rare frown.

“huh, having the resolve not to kill seems way more brave to me.” It was brave back in his Underground, but doubly so now. For some reason, at that moment he felt a chill on his shoulder. Sans looked behind him, and although he could swear he saw something for a moment, there was nobody there.

Confused, he shook his head to clear it and turned back towards Toriel, who had a displeased expression on her face. He met it with his own stare, which made it evident to her that he was not budging on this matter.

“If that is the case, then prove to me you have the ability, and the will to survive!”

Without any other warning, a series of searing fireballs was launched his way, which he immediately stepped and dodged away from.

 He couldn’t help but sigh with disappointment; he really kind of wanted to not fight here, even if it was totally wishful thinking. Toriel wouldn’t let him go until she was certain of his abilities, and even then...

Her attack was a fierce one, but when it came to his turn, he simply refused to fight obviously. This innocent act unfortunately infuriated the woman and caused her attacks to become even more dangerous. She didn’t seem to be controlling her strength much.

“Attack me! ” She snapped, watching him skip yet another turn. 

“nope, i’m good.” He subtly bat away a stray fireball with a bit of blue magic, not at all rising to her provocations.

Toriel growled in frustration, unable to hit him, but also unable to draw out any semblance of an actual battle. The longer this went on, the more and more confused and desperate her expression came.

“Why… why won’t you attack at all?! ” She pleaded.

“because i don’t want to hurt you.” he replied simply, as if that was all there was to it. And really, that’s all there really was.

“I’m trying to kill you!” She screamed, shaking her head with frustration. “Do something, anything! ” 

He felt a bit bad for distressing a distant version of his friend, but he wasn’t interested in fighting her. He simply shook his head.

Toriel’s face fell, and her attacks unintentionally faltered. She continued to throw them out furiously, but they were even easier to dodge than before.

“Just stay here… please , I’ll protect you. He can’t, I can— I can protect you. ” 

He could tell she was referring to Flowey. However, it’s not like he really needed anyone in particular to protect him, despite how seemingly weak he may be. 

Aside from that, he realized as he continued to avoid her useless reckless attacks, that loneliness was the most prominent emotion on her face, more than anything else. And a desire to protect something that in the past, she could not.

However, he couldn’t just go along with her wishes.

He moved decisively, stepping into the cover of a fireball and the moment clear visual was lost, he took a shortcut directly behind her. Immediately she became incredibly confused and looked frantically around the room. Sans had mercy on her though and gently poked the woman in the back to notify her of his presence. 

And he of course ducked the hot swipe of Toriel’s hand that lashed out at him in her surprise.

“woah, you almost fried the hair you spent all that time on.” He commented nonchalantly with his usual grin while she stared at him in befuddlement, obviously not understanding how he got behind her. And…

“You…you didn’t attack me…You were in the perfect position, why?”

Sans couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at her, since he really felt that he had proven his pacifistic ways pretty definitively, but apparently this still caught her off guard.

“i thought we’d been over this” He rolled his eyes, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

For a few long moments, she said nothing, but after that she suddenly sunk to the ground, thoroughly confused and defeated.

“Hah…hah…it seems you never needed my protection at all…and yet…” 

Sans simply stood silently, listening.

“You still do not consider violence at all…you were right, that is a far braver action.” She smiled bitterly at the ground. 

“And truthfully…the only reason I really wanted to keep you here was because of my own arrogance, and selfishness.”

With a sigh, she stood up in front of him, her height looming over him but not as oppressive as it had felt before.

“Nonetheless, you have proven to me that you are more capable than any others before you, and perhaps you may have a chance to make it through, even though I still do not know why you are so adamant.”

She shook her head, tired and exasperated. Sans tilted his head in a show of sympathy, simultaneously amused; his insistence to march on into a scary dungeon of dangerous monsters was probably pretty confusing for the average onlooker.

Toriel then kneeled down to his level (although she was actually still taller than him) and put a large hand on his shoulder.

“Human, you may leave, and I will not stop you, but…” her eyes drifted to the ground, pained, before meeting his again. “But please...do not come back.” 

She looked indecisive after that moment. And so, carried on by instinct and hazy memories, Sans made the decision for her by leaning in and giving her a hug. She was stiff only for a moment, putting a restrained hand on his back. It was weird since he didn’t hug anyone except his brother, but if he closed his eyes he could pretend he was with his Toriel, in some random neutral or pacifist timeline.

However, she pulled away quickly and the fantasy was lost before it could truly begin, which was probably for the best.

She took a deep breath, and then quickly absconded down the hall. Although not before stopping next to the Flowey, who was still sitting there and carefully watching her with a guarded, but undeniably thoughtful expression.

Toriel gave him a cold glare, not nearly as vicious as before, but enough to be intimidating.

“Do not fail again.” 

After that, she left them and the room went silent.

Sans quickly scooped Flowey back up, sparing him a somewhat curious glance before taking them back near Toriel’s house to Save and then right back to the door again. It really barely took a second. It was easy for him to pinpoint the save points from a distance and open a shortcut to them without a second thought.

“Hmph…at least you remembered that.” Flowey said, breaking the silence.

He was glad to hear the flower speak, because he didn’t do all too well with overly serious situations, and it had been feeling kinda somber as of late.

“course’, no way i’m doing that again.” 

He really didn’t know how Frisk did it, emotionally and physically, it was exhausting. Actually, now that he was thinking about it, and the adrenaline was winding down; that had been a lot of dodging with zero breaks, and his chest had begun to burn when he breathed back there.

“urgh … actually, can we take a break before we leave?” He grinned weakly, plopping down onto the floor.

Flowey was set down as well, who raised a brow at him in curious concern.

“Your stamina is kind of terrible, isn’t it?”

“it's the worst.” Sans confirmed. At least before it was limited to sweat and sleepiness when he overworked himself, but now for some reason he began to breathe heavily too, and when he did that too much, his chest burned and it felt rather like dying. Was this normal for humans?

Having a highly physical body wasn’t all it was cut out to be. What was next, he’d get some sort of human sickness?

…

He probably shouldn’t jinx himself.

“anyways, i’m gonna take a nap, wake me up in like…15 minutes.”

He only got to hear Flowey sputter in confusion for a moment or two before he curled up and conked out in record time.

Sans woke up slowly, coming out of the haze of an unfamiliar dream that was already slipping through his memory. It felt like neither one of his memories, or Frisk’s, and he thought he could maybe remember seeing someone like Toriel in it. Either way, it was something that he put out of his mind with a satisfying stretch, which probably made him look like a starfish. Interestingly though, his head was not on the ground, but rather…vines?

Flowey sat there looking rather bored, but his attention was immediately drawn when Sans awoke. Long vines of the non-thorny variety curled up from out of his flowerpot and formed a sort of pillow. It wasn’t the most comfortable pillow he’d ever used, but it was miles better than the floor.

“aw, bud, ya shouldn’t have.” He flashed a wide smile towards the flower who quickly became embarrassed and pulled the vines away, allowing them to disappear into the pot.

“Well you just suddenly passed out! And the floor’s hard, and dirty…” He whined, pouting.

Sans chuckled while sitting up, flashing Flowey a lazy smile.

“i didn’t pass out, i just took an impromptu nap.”

“Impromptu nap-?!” Flowey began to blurt before Sans then abruptly stood up and interrupted the flower by picking up the pot.

“welp, we should probably get going, huh?”

Flowey grumbled in annoyance at being cut off, but he agreed. He felt a bit bad for leaving the flower out to dry while he slept, but it couldn’t be helped. 

Together, they approached the door. Sans pushed it open with a little a lot of help from some blue magic and peered out. It would seem that this didn’t lead directly outside though, which he didn’t find particularly odd since this door seemed kind of small compared to the massive door he had always sat next to and knocked on.

It was a somewhat long walk, and Sans caught Flowey’s expression from the corner of his eye; it was pensive and contemplative, like he was considering saying something.

Sans said nothing for the moment.

When they finally arrived at the real door Sans stopped to take it in. It was truly strange looking at the door from this side. He could almost imagine Toriel sat up against it with a notebook, tea and pie, and a comfy pillow underneath her.

He shook the thought from his head, and turned towards Flowey expectantly. The flower appeared to understand what he was getting at, hesitating for a moment before finally speaking what was on his mind.

“I…I met humans before you.” He murmured, staring into the ground with a far off expression. Sans could have guessed that he had, but he was a little surprised that Flowey was telling him so directly.

“I tried to help them, but they all…” He trailed off, his mouth forming a tight line. “I couldn’t protect them, and I…I don’t know if I can protect you, either.”

Sans closed his eyes, a small but reassuring smile on his face.

“I’ll be okay.”

Flowey took that in for a few long moments, he didn’t look especially confident, but he seemed to be trying to accept it.

“Right, you’ll be fine…” He muttered quietly. After trying to internalize that concept, Flowey sighed and looked back up at Sans.

“By the way I…if you really could help monsters — not hurt anyone, change this place… I think that’d be good too…so…I just wanna let you know I’ll go along with it.”

Sans smiled genuinely. “I know, thank you.”

Flowey looked a bit embarrassed for a second before finally sighing and closing his eyes.

“I should have figured you’d want to do something like this…you two are similar in a lot of ways…”

Sans wondered who exactly Flowey was talking about, but although the flower had freely said this statement, Sans could immediately tell that it wasn’t something that Flowey would elaborate on, so he didn’t bother trying.

All that being said, it was time to open this door. He was both dreading and looking forward to it. It left a strange feeling in his stomach that he couldn’t pin down. But he had honestly stalled enough. 

Taking a deep breath, Sans gathered up his Determination and pushed the massive door open. He simply couldn’t deny this time that it was mostly done with magic, and it humbled him a bit when he remembered that Frisk had probably opened this themselves.

Even as a human, it would appear Sans still had the physical strength of a wet noodle.

The instant he stepped outside he was overwhelmed with a feeling of…

COLD.

It was officially confirmed, being a human was way overrated. 

Sans was glad he was wearing a hoodie at least, but his shorts and thin shirt still made it quite chilly. 

Back when he was a skeleton, he could identify the temperature at least, but it had really just passed right through him. But now when he stood in the cold air his entire body vibrated with shivers, it probably didn’t help that he was quite skinny for a human too.

“I regret everything. ” he groaned, pulling Flowey into his jacket so he could easily hold him while stuffing his freezing digits into his pockets.

Flowey huffed, but was fairly concerned regardless.

“It’s the coldest in the outskirts, let’s just start moving.”

Sans began to nod, but then remembered something. Looking to the side he spotted a familiar camera hiding in the white bush next to him. He simply couldn’t help himself and crouched down to look directly at it in an extremely obvious manner.

He set Flowey down, and pulled out his hands to make a double peace sign, flashing the lens a winning smile. It was in a manner that Sans hoped was cute in some way, since he knew it was something Alphys was weak to.

“What the heck are you doing?” Flowey questioned him incredulously. He was probably surprised that Sans noticed the camera, but said nothing about it.

“giving a good first impression; if whoever’s looking sees it maybe they won’t try and kill us as hard.” He replied half seriously. 

Flowey simply gave him a dead stare and rolled his eyes, muttering under his breath, “ Ugh, considering that doctor maybe it’ll actually work… ”

Sans caught the comment of course and chuckled lightly, although it was a little shaky due to his shivers. He picked Flowey back up and stuffed his hands back into his pockets, sighing in relief now that they were out of the cold.

Finally, Sans started on walking down a deeply familiar path. He had been carefully keeping the thought of himself and Papyrus out of his mind, but it was impossible now when he was gradually getting closer. He really didn’t know what he planned on doing with them, he didn’t even know if he could handle seeing Papyrus without reacting.

When it came down to stuff like this, sometimes it was just best to go forward without any concrete plan or worries, or else you’d never be able to do it. So when Sans sensed an uncannily familiar presence on the edge of his magical senses, he just continued forward with determination.

When he came to the large branch, Sans grinned and stepped on it to snap it with a subtle bit of magic. Flowey didn’t question his methods and just looked on in exasperation. With amusement, Sans recognized that it would probably mess up his other self’s little scare routine.

When Sans passed it by however, he suddenly heard a sharp crack behind him. When he whipped his head around to look, the branch was completely shattered rather than snapped.

Touchĕ other Sans…touchĕ…

As they walked down the creepy path, he could distantly hear strange scratching noises on the edge of his hearing, and of course, additional footsteps behind him that disappeared when he turned to look. Now that he was thinking about it, maybe it hadn’t been the best idea to scare a human kid like this back then right off the coattails of leaving Toriel behind.

Well, it was in the past now. This Sans was putting in the work to make it even scarier, even if it didn’t particularly work on him. Scares were about as effective on Sans as getting Papyrus to give up. It simply didn’t work; you can’t scare the scare master.

Therefore, when he arrived at the bridge (which was full of deadly spikes haphazardly affixed to it and red paint splattered all over) Sans just patiently waited until it was his turn to turn around. Flowey on the other hand looked very tense, probably for good reason. Sans wasn’t entirely sure about the reasons this Sans had that influenced him into not killing the supposed human immediately, after all, but he was pretty confident in this move.

“Human, don’t you know how to greet a new pal? ”

Despite everything, the voice startled him, mostly because he was literally hearing his exact same voice directly behind him, and it was unsettling. Although technically, his voice was a little different now at least.

“Turn around, and shake my hand. ”

It felt like there was a rock in his stomach, but Sans put on a casual and unbothered face and turned around, shifting his hold on Flowey to grip it with one hand.

He glanced down, and while there wasn’t a whoopie cushion in that familiar skeletal hand, there was an electric buzzer. What a nasty trick! Although he assumed it wouldn’t do him too much harm.

That being said, Sans wasn’t interested in getting electrocuted today, so instead he flashed the skeleton a jovial smile that made him feel like he was standing in front of a mirror, reached his hand out, and gripped the man’s wrist instead.

The other Sans looked surprised (although nobody except him could probably tell that), but continued on without missing a beat.

“huh, the buzzer in the hand trick is always funny, sure you don’t wanna give it a try?”

He wiggled his fingers temptingly, but Sans just dismissed it with a hand on his hip and a wry grin. He also noticed that the skeleton gave Flowey a quick and considering glance, but didn’t say anything.

“nah, i’m good. i’ll just imagine it, i’m not interested in any shocking discoveries today.”

Sans could tell that amused the skeleton given the way his eyes light up just slightly. Speaking of…this guy had the magic eye out…and it was red? It was kind of cool looking, admittedly, but it seemed kind of exhausting. Weird, but Sans ignored it for now. 

Actually, he was wearing a lot of red in general.

And black, but the red stood out to him the most. He had this thought before, but it really seemed like this Underground had some sort of color scheme. It was probably a good thing that he and this guy didn’t look too obviously similar though, even if there were a ton of parallels if one took a good look at them. Sans was pretty sure that ‘alternate universe human Sans’ wasn’t really the first thing people would think of though.

“hm, if you say so. well, the name’s sans, sans the skeleton.”

Well that was a problem, it was just too weird to refer to this guy as Sans, so…

Putting a thoughtful and casual finger on his chin, Sans nodded as if he had made up his mind, 

“yep, i think i’ll call you red.”

That got a reaction out of him.

“why though. ”

Sans couldn’t help but grin widely in a cheerful manner, innocently putting a hand on his cheek and asking,

“why not? i think it fits. you even have a red eye, red. ”

“because i literally just gave you my name, it’s not even that long.”

“nicknames always bring pals closer together, don’t ya think?”

“we’re not pals.”

“hm? i’m pretty sure you called me a ‘pal’ just a minute ago.”

It appeared Red had reached his limit, face-palming in pure exasperation and annoyance. Heheheh, it would appear his counterpart didn’t quite reach Sans’ level of patience in bullshitery.

“ugh, whatever, the point is i’m actually a sentry. and we’re kind of supposed to kill humans, you know.”

“that so? then why aren’t you killing me?”

Actually he was pretty sure the job of sentries was just to notify the royal guard, but Papyrus had always gotten overzealous with such things. It was possible things worked differently here though, too.

Red shrugged with a grin. “i’m too lazy and cowardly to kill anyone. sides’, the honors ought to go to my bro, papyrus.” he explained self-deprecatingly.

Sans really didn’t like the imagery of Papyrus killing anyone, so he purposefully ignored that implication.

“Well it’s not like that’s going to happen either, pal. ” Flowey interjected, glaring at Sans’ counterpart. Red considered the flower with a bland gaze, but otherwise just shrugged.

“well, either way you gotta pass through here, and my bro is vigilant. but hey, don’t sweat it, papyrus is an honorable skeleton, he won’t kill ya before tenderizin’ ya first.”

Sans raised a bemused brow.

“with traps and puzzles?” He asked.

“with traps and puzzles.” Red confirmed.

“great, can’t wait.” Sans kept the sigh he wanted to let out to himself. Sans did have an appreciation for puzzles mostly because of his brother, but he wasn’t exactly keen on doing them himself.

“heh… anyways, you can actually just pass right through this gate thingy if you just duck, the bars and the spikes aren’t close enough.”

Sans turned around and noticed that yes, indeed you could. Although it was still kind of treacherous considering the deep chasm. It was part of the reason why nobody was supposed to come around here, aside from how cold and far it was from town.

Carefully, Sans ducked through, his goggles just slightly scratched the top, but overall easy enough. Red on the other hand just…appeared. Not that it was even remotely surprising to him, but Sans couldn’t help but find it weird when someone else was being weird, creepy, and mysterious. That was kind of his thing.

Well, he supposed he could let Red have it.

The place here looked identical as to how he remembered it, aside from that…terribly inconveniently shaped lamp. On the edge of his senses, he could recognize a familiar presence approaching. Really, he could have identified it from a mile away. Red of course took notice as well, smirking at him and pointing towards the weird lamp.

“looks like papyrus is coming, you should hide behind that conveniently shaped lamp.”

It was a blatant lie and Sans didn’t have to see the smugly amused expression on Red’s face to know it. Sans simply rolled his eyes and flashed a cheeky grin back at him, hopping over to the sentry station instead and crouching underneath it. He saw Flowey smirk belatedly at the put-off look Red shot them.

Sans tried to share that amusement to try and drown out the anxiety about seeing this world’s version of his brother. And right on cue, Papyrus arrived.

“sup’, bro?”

“DO NOT ‘SUP’ ME SANS.”

In vying curiosity, Sans peeked over the station despite Flowey’s hurried whispers to keep his head down. He just had to see.

And wow.

If his brother had met this one he definitely would have thought he was cool as hell. It was like seeing a spikier version of Papyrus. In every place his brother was round, this guy was sharp.

He was super cool.

Not as cool as his bro, of course, but still very cool.

Sans was pretty distracted by looking at Papyrus so he wasn’t really following the back and forth going on here. Papyrus seemed pretty mad, even more than he was used to. 

All of a sudden however, he turned Sans’ way and they made eye contact. An awkward and brief glance at Red informed him that he was to blame. Payback undoubtedly.

Sheepishly and with a friendly grin, Sans stood up from his crouched position in the snow. He had the urge to scratch the back of his head but was unwilling to remove his hand from its pocket.

“uh…hi.” 

Papyrus was entirely shell-shocked, and didn’t make a move until Red waved a hand in front his face. After that he immediately shot off like a bullet, Sans hardly had time to react before Papyrus was in his face and tightly gripping his shoulders to intently inspect him.

Sans blinked and exchanged a glance with Flowey, simply befuddled as he allowed the overzealous skeleton to verify his identity all he wished.

“YOU….ARE A HUMAN?”

“uh, yup.” Sans hoped that sounded natural.

That made Papyrus release him at once, backing up and breathing in with his hands held near his face. He only seemed to think for a second or two before quickly running off in the direction he came again screaming out frantic orders.

“I WILL PREPARE THE PUZZLES AND TRAPS HUMAN, SANS, DO NOT WASTE ANY TIME! ”

Red, completely used to such behavior simply gave his brother’s rapidly fleeting form a lazy salute.

“righto’ boss.”

Sans was all at once hit with a sense of dire longing and homesickness as he stood there witnessing the interaction, and it was staggering. But with a bit of reluctant determination he managed a weak grin at Red, who probably took his expression to have a different meaning due to the smirk on his face.

“ready to be tenderized?”

“heh…you betcha’....”

Chapter Text

After that, Red left the way he came, but not before giving some mildly threatening suggestions to go along with Papyrus’ schemes. Not that Sans was really planning on skipping them (even though he didn’t really want to do them), since he’d feel too bad about it. 

And although Red quickly made his exit in the opposite direction, Sans knew of course that the skeleton would simply take a shortcut ahead of them, since he had done the same exact thing once upon a time. He was dearly tempted to take a shortcut there first just to mess with the guy, but he was also hesitant to cast a suspicious eye onto himself, especially from his counterpart.

He supposed he’d just have to find new, humany ways to mess with people. Together with the classics, of course. 

Even without giving blatantly obvious tells about his identity, Sans still ended up feeling nervous about someone making the connection, for a reason he couldn’t entirely identify. 

Maybe it was that putting a lens on who he actually was would make him think about everything he lost. Or maybe it was now that he had a convenient ‘out,' he wanted to run away from himself to move on from everything that made him hurt.

Maybe it was both.

Either way it wasn’t something he was really prepared to confront just yet, so for now he wanted to get by without anyone knowing who he was.

Ah, the horrifying ordeal of being known…

He had some suspicion that Flowey had some idea of his secret identity, but so far nothing had been said explicitly and therefore it was a topic both of them ignored. Since Sans was not prying too deeply into Flowey’s personal matters, perhaps he was extending that same courtesy to him.

But anyways…man…

“it’s so cold…” 

As a skeleton monster it had never really hit him just how cold it could be here. Suddenly he wished he had grabbed more than a ribbon and a comb from Toriel’s. 

Not to mention a little bit of guilt for not grabbing Frisk a jacket their first time through.

Sorry bout’ that Tori.

“I told you, we should really get a move on!” 

Flowey chastised him, looking upwards with an admonishing expression.

“yeah yeah i know…”

Sans set forward. When he moved his body warmed up a bit at least, he wasn’t entirely sure how that worked (human biology was not very well known to monsters after all), but perhaps it was similar to how when you used a lot of magic, your body would get kind of warm.

Luckily, shortly after walking he came upon a save point. He was getting kind of used to it now, but the feeling of when you first activate a new save point was really indescribable, and weird. As he did it, he couldn’t help but remember that terrible lamp. But now that he was thinking about it, it might have still been an inconveniently shaped lamp even if he was in his own normal Underground, since he and frisk were not quite the same shape anyways.

…Weird thought aside, he successfully saved.

Afterwards, Sans found himself distracted by the pole sticking in the snow right next to the icy river. He really didn’t need to look, but he couldn’t help it. He was curious about any sort of change in a place he was so deeply familiar with.

He walked up to it, and noticed it was black instead of the red he remembered. He honestly wasn’t quite sure why he felt this compelled to go out of his way and check out stuff, maybe it was some newfound human curiosity.

Regardless, despite Flowey’s protests, he ended up tugging on the line.

However…instead of fishing up a note or something, a circle of small spikes suddenly shot up around him.

“uh…”

“I told you not to touch it!!” Flowey yelled at him, which fair enough Sans supposed, but still…

“well how was i supposed to guess it would do that?”

“isn’t a random fishing pole sticking from the ground a little suspicious to you?”

It was kind of weird, sure, but he really couldn’t quite understand how that was connected to the potential for bodily harm. It was a fishing pole.

“well i dunno’, maybe someone was trying to reel in a fishy partner.”

Flowey looked at him like he said something completely asinine, and maybe he had, but frankly it was something that had happened before so he really wished Flowey wouldn’t look at him like that.

“what? It could happen.” He said so defensively, but he couldn’t help his usual smile tugging upwards at the corners slightly, especially when Flowey groaned, covering his face with his leaves in terrible exasperation.

“anyways, this is a lame trap though, don’t you think?” To demonstrate, Sans simply walked out of the tiny ring of spikes, even someone as short as him could do it.

Flowey did look considerate at that at least, seemingly also confused at the terribly lackluster design. Pretty half-assed if you asked him.

“It is weird…It definitely wasn’t done by Papyrus, and Sans…” Flowey gave him an extremely brief glance “It also definitely wasn’t Red, some kids maybe…” the flower didn’t look particularly convinced on that last point though.

Sans stopped himself from suggesting it was someone from Grillby’s for obvious reasons, but he wasn’t actually sure who it might be. It could very well be someone completely different from the lonely monster that bummed around in Grillby’s that he was thinking of.

“well, whatever right? it’s not a very sofishticated trap, so let’s not worry about it.” He said as much and began to walk away. Flowey just sighed.

“you’re too carefree…”

“better than being uptight.” Sans grinned.

Sans couldn’t see it, but he could just tell the flower was rolling his eyes through exasperated magic alone.

“kind of seems like it’s something that will get you killed, actually.” He grumbled, to which Sans just shrugged with infinite nonchalance.

“someone’s gotta bring some good energy down here, and it may as well be me.” Sans was pretty confident in his ability to slip out of any sticky situation after all.

“besides, you can just do all that worrying for me. sounds like a good plan, huh?” He continued, and smiled when Flowey looked up at him incredulously at the suggestion. However after a second or two, the flower’s expression just turned contemplative, and perhaps a little nostalgic. 

“Well…whatever I guess, I suppose in some manner I did volunteer to be your babysitter.” Flowey said dryly, which made Sans let out a small snort.

“well i wouldn’t go that far.” He weakly defended himself, but was undeniably amused.

As Sans made his way down the path he remembered that there was a dimensional box that sat around this area. And sure enough, it was here too. He didn’t have any particular need to store anything, but he figured he may as well take a peek inside anyways.

However…

“uh... is this thing always like this?” For whatever reason it simply wouldn’t open. He didn’t even realize they had any locking function, since Alphys had installed them to be completely open for public use. 

Flowey sighed, crossing his leaves in consideration of the box.

“No, not usually. That doctor installed these a while back, but I’ve never seen them locked before.”

Sans thought for a moment, and then realized that he should probably inquire who ‘that doctor’ was, even though he almost certainly already knew the answer.

“and that is?” 

Flowey glanced at him and readily explained.

“She’s the royal scientist all the way in Hotland, which is two locations removed from here. Most stuff like this is her doing, including that little camera you were sticking your face at.”

Sans couldn’t help but grin at that, shrugging casually.

“well, then it’s a good thing I left a good first impression then. what’s she like?”

Flowey’s face scrunched up in distaste, and he could tell that there was some animosity present there, even if he wouldn’t really classify it as hatred or anything so intense as that.

“She’s an absolute weirdo, and a coward. She’s also…a little too honest with her desires if you ask me.” Flowey had a funny look on his face, but eventually he rolled his eyes in exasperation.

“Who knows, maybe it's a ‘crushing guilt’ coping mechanism.” The flower drawled. Sans suspected that Flowey was quite familiar with Alphys’ tendencies.

“hm…” Sans hummed non-committedly, trying to get an image for what this Alphys may be like. And given Flowey’s words, he guessed that the amalgamates were indeed created this time around as well.

Well, in the end he simply felt bad for Alphys, and this applied to the one inhabiting this world as well. He guessed that the way things were in this particular universe didn’t really help matters when it came to healthily processing that guilt. But…well he wasn’t exactly one to talk.

Suddenly, as they were both thinking, the stubborn box just popped open for no discernible reason.

“oh. cool. it’s open i guess.”

Flowey looked absolutely miffed, and stopped Sans from reaching in with a speedy vine.

“Don’t just stick your hand in it!”

Sans felt the urge to cross his arms, but he couldn’t, given one hand was currently being wrangled by a vine and another holding a pot.

“why not?”

“Because it could be a trap.” The flower ground out. But personally Sans thought he was being kind of dramatic. Well aside from that, using his magical senses to feel around the hazy space that was the dimensional box he could already tell there wasn’t anything harmful in there.

“i mean, if it was a trap why would it even be locked in the first place?” Sans asked reasonably, which gave Flowey pause.

“W-well…still, it’s suspicious anyways!” 

Sans snorted, reluctantly amused at Flowey’s caution, but a little concerned that Flowey was this wary in the first place. 

“If you insist on reaching inside, then just let me do it.” The flower huffed, but Sans raised a brow.

“How is you reaching inside any better than me putting my hand in?” He asked, now a little miffed himself.

“Because vines grow back, human arms, do not.” He said matter-of-factly and quickly released Sans’ arm, reaching inside and pulling out the small item it housed. Sans was a little put-off by such an admission, even if it was partially true. It probably still hurt though, didn’t it?

Flowey shouldn’t value his own safety so little.

That aside, the item Flowey pulled out were actually some gloves with five fingers. They looked pretty tough, but kind of dusty. When Flowey got a proper look at it, his expression turned somewhat frigid, and Sans was beginning to get an idea why. There were only so many people these suspiciously strewn about items could belong to, after all.

Because of that, he was actually beginning to feel kind of reluctant to use them. But it really would be nice to have some gloves, his tiny fingers felt like they were going to fall off to be honest…

While Sans thought about it, Flowey made the decision for him.

“Just wear them.” 

A vine pressed them lightly against his chest.

“They’re better off used to help your fingers not fall off than they are sitting in a box.” He said simply. There was a remnant of melancholy there, but he seemed more concerned about Sans’ current well-being than any memento.

Sans didn’t say anything for a few moments, before finally smiling and replying.

“alright, i’ll take good care of them, then.”

The flower seemed a little embarrassed, but nodded nonetheless. So Sans set down the pot and carefully pulled the gloves on. They weren’t winter gloves exactly, but they were sturdy and thick and therefore pretty decent at keeping out the cold. Orange was a weird look for him he thought, but oh well.

He was relieved to have them honestly, and now Sans could comfortably hold Flowey’s pot without stuffing his hands in his pockets at the same time. 

They passed by Papyrus’ shoddy sentry station (which was splattered with red paint and various spikes for some reason, making it look rather impossible to use.) and ahead Sans could sense Doggo’s presence.

The dog’s station looked scratched up, and there were various toasty dog treats strewn about. When Sans slowly approached with silent steps, he could spot the tops of Doggo’s ears, and faintly hear some snoring. 

So he was asleep then. It would be nice if they could just walk past in that case..

Unfortunately fate was not so kind, because the second Sans even got close, the dog jumped up and began sniffing wildly completely out of the blue, drowsy but energetic. 

Ah. Right. Humans had a much stronger smell than any monster, huh? He kind of wished he had just shortcut past now even though he was 90% sure his counterpart was spying on them.

“Hm?! What’s there? If it’s a human, I’ll cut you to pieces!” 

Sans rapidly found himself pulled into a FIGHT and needed to duck a swing from Doggo’s blade. It was a rusty and crude sword, not particularly suited for a royal guard, Sans thought (or rather, what Papyrus would have thought), but it had clearly been through many battles.

“Grrr, something’s moving here!” 

Of course, since Sans was dodging Doggo’s attacks he was plainly alerted to the movement. Sans remembered that the kid had simply stood still when Doggo’s blue attack came through, but at the moment his attacks were so wild there wasn’t even any chance to.

Aside from that…Sans never stood still during blue attacks, he always just dodged them. He was pretty sure the only blue attack he’d ever willingly stood still for was from his brother. 

Soon enough, Doggo appeared to be getting confused and frustrated. Therefore, he began to ready a large, sweeping blue attack.

Ah jeez, he was gonna have to stand still for this one wasn’t he?

He really didn’t want to, like really. Seriously.

And yet…

Sans pulled together a little Determination and managed to stand his ground without even a twitch while the harmless blue attack passed through his body.

Blue attacks—although they did no damage if you didn’t move, still felt weird as they went, so Sans had to repress a shudder afterwards.

Doggo appeared completely and utterly confused, looking around uselessly. Carefully, Sans snuck into his blind spot and gingerly gave him a pet. Unfortunately although he seemed to enjoy it, the dog freaked out and swung his blade recklessly, forcing Sans to retreat.

It would appear things wouldn’t be quite that simple, huh?

Fighting Doggo ended up being an ordeal, if a straightforward one. He had to wait things out, wait for another opportunity, and sneak in another pet. And each time Doggo became less and less violent. Vaguely, Sans likened it to taming a wild dog, who happened to be blind as a bat.

And finally—FINALLY, Doggo left them alone, both extremely puzzled and satisfied by all the pets he had gotten from something that apparently wasn’t moving.

Both he and Flowey breathed out a sigh of relief. Sans doubly so since his chest was heaving slightly. Ugh, stupid…human…whatever it was that was making him breathe. 

“well…that was ruff.” Sans remarked simply, wheezing quietly.

The flower just nodded silently and appeared to give him a thorough look over, once again verifying his safety. Flowey then appeared to realize something interesting.

“You…haven’t taken any damage so far, have you?”

It was true, Sans hadn’t taken a single point of damage, and he’d really like to keep it that way.

Although he did have extra HP now, the thought of taking a hit just really weirded him out, for what he thought were pretty justifiable reasons. When you lived your whole life with a single HP to hang on to, and then all of a sudden gained some more, well it didn’t mean you weren’t still completely terrified about losing even a single point. 

Frankly, Sans kind of hated fighting and dodging attacks, even if he was good at it. 

It was just stressful. Even if the constant self-reminder that he wouldn’t dust now—or rather, just die the human way—from a single attack took the edge off of that a bit.

“nope, pretty good right?” 

Flowey frowned, appearing to be thinking of something more than he was displeased, slowly nodding. The nodding became increasingly more sure after a second though.

“It is good. You…suck at fighting, but you’re weirdly competent at dodging at least.” The flower made a face when he said ‘suck’, as if he wasn’t really sure it applied at all, but didn’t correct himself. And so, Sans didn’t either.

“yep, i’m the dogging master.”

Unfortunately, Flowey already appeared partially immune to Sans’ puns, so he no longer got much of a reaction. He did get a judging stare though.

“Sure, but your stamina is still terrible.” 

Oof, he didn’t have to bring him down like that, did he?

“By the way, why don’t you zip up your hoodie?” Flowey reminded him, a brow raised. Sans just stood there for a solid second or two before he realized.

Oh yeah, he could do that. 

He pretty much never did, so it hadn’t even occurred to him.

“oh crud, you’re right-”

Funnily enough, the only thing he got from Flowey was a slightly fond, but still very exasperated eye-roll.

After that Sans was feeling…sort of warm, except for his legs. But oh well, they warmed up while he walked anyway. 

However, on the edge of his hearing, he thought he could hear some sort of commotion going on ahead of them. It kind of sounded like it was from where Sans remembered a sentient snowman sat.

So, they immediately walked past the slippery ice and turned the corner to check it out. Flowey seemed to have given up trying to stop Sans from walking into potential danger, given he only let out a quiet sigh.

When Sans finally got sight of where the snowman sat, he was more than a little shocked (and angry) at what he saw. Some teenagers were pulling apart pieces of the snowman and kicking it, and it was looking much more like a pile of snow than a snowman.

An odd feeling of indignation rose up in him, and it was a feeling of anger that he only barely remembered the taste of.

He took a very brief moment to verify that his counterpart was not spying on them, and then took a short range shortcut directly behind the rowdy teens.

“hey.”

The effects were immediate, it seemed he had damn near scared them to dust, because they jumped and whipped around extremely quickly. The moment they saw him there was a flash of confusion in their eyes, and Sans figured that maybe they had thought it was Red, even though their voices were different.

“whatcha’ doin.” He asked; his face was smiling like usual, but it was clear his eyes were not.

The teenagers shifted uncomfortably, despite the fact that they did not recognize him. They quickly began to recover, however. The Snowdrake among them, who Sans vaguely recognized as the kid whose mom had fallen down, was the first to talk.

“What’s it to you?” The kid sniffed arrogantly, turning up his nose at the stranger who interrupted their ‘fun.’ Sans sensed Flowey giving the kids a considerable glare.

“We’re just havin’ a bit of fun, it’s just a stupid snowman, and he’s not cool at all”

The Snowdrake got a funny smile on his face at the pun while his friends readily agreed about the snowman with nasty and immature smiles on their faces. In return, Snowdrake was spurred on and went to kick at the snowman again to prove their point.

Of course, the teenager was never able to, since Sans appeared quite immediately right next to the monster with a hand placed on his shoulder. Sans did not have the physical strength to stop him, but he allowed a bit of blue magic to seep through his fingers and freeze the kid in his place. It wasn’t enough to cast too much suspicion on him, but enough.

“H-hey!” The Snowdrake sputtered.

Sans closed his eyes for a few moments, before his grin abruptly widened. 

“hey, don’t blame me. it’s ice that you’re going on an icecapade over here, but you gotta chill out. picking on this iceolated snowman who can’t even fight back? well…” 

Sans winked at the kid, but there was a hardness about it as he threw his jokes back at him.

“it’s not very cool, is it?”

The Snowdrake stood completely shell-shocked, and couldn’t even muster up a suitable reaction while his friends sputtered. Sans leveled the rest of them with a hard but friendly stare as well.

“same goes for you guys. like, what’s even the point of messing with a snowman?” Sans’ stare turned slightly sympathetic. “listen, i snow i don’t know a thing about your problems, but that doesn’t mean you gotta take it out on others.”

Sans really felt like he was a teacher giving some rowdy teenagers a good talking to. But…well, partially, that was what he was doing. Maybe these kids never really had anyone who would set a good example. And at that point, they could hardly be blamed…

Not that they shouldn’t take responsibility, though.

Sans carefully sat Flowey down, who had really taken a backseat here and allowed ‘his charge’ to take care of this himself, not that he wasn’t watching carefully the whole time.

After that, Sans smiled brightly at the crowded teens and clapped his hands together with a cheeriness that made the group step back.

“right then, now that we’ve got that covered—it’s time for you to fix it!” The group of kids all looked confused, glancing back at the ruined snowman. They watched silently as Sans walked through them and picked up the lost and battered head of the snowman, who seemed to manage a bleary smile back at him despite the various missing pieces.

“sorry buddy…i’ll put you back together.” He muttered, then looking up to shoot the teenagers a expecting stare.

“well?” 

At Sans’ word, they quickly scrambled in various directions to gather up nearby snow and the missing pieces of snowman. It was very funny honestly, and Sans looked on with crossed arms. He glanced at Flowey.

“heheh…not bad, huh?” 

Flowey rolled his eyes, but also looked somewhat amused…and glad.

“Yes, you certainly know how to wrangle some stupid teenagers.” He quipped sarcastically, but Sans could catch the genuine undertones.

“Would have been nice back then…” Flowey muttered quietly, looking like he was thinking of an old memory. Sans didn’t feel the need to pry too much, so he simply let it pass.

The teens admirably did their best, despite them still murmuring rebelliously. But Sans could still catch feelings of guilt coming from them as they went, so he figured it was just part of the edgy teen experience to complain.

Sans helped out too eventually, but he had mostly wanted the teens to take care of it themselves as a learning experience (definitely not because he was lazy.) But aside from that, Sans was a little concerned that simply picking up random snow wouldn’t entirely fix the snowman. It was sentient, so it was obviously made of magic as well as snow.

Sans carefully looked around and scooped up the snow that he could tell was infused with magic, patting it into the snowman. The little dude was already looking much better, especially now that he had all his face pieces in order. 

“Thank you so much for putting me back together…” The snowman thanked, it was hard to tell with the way its face worked, but it seemed to be looking at the teenagers too. The teens had the decency to look ashamed for having done this to the poor snowman in the first place.

“It was scary when I got pulled apart but…” The snowman managed a smile. “I was really happy and glad when you decided to put me back together.” Monsters and magic were sensitive to emotions after all, the regret of the kids must have gotten through.

The group looked both embarrassed and glad, although they were obviously trying to hide it. Unsuccessfully, of course; anyone could have tell, honestly.

“make sure you apologize, too.” Sans chastised lightly in good humor, waggling an admonishing finger at the lot of them.

They all looked like a variation of affronted at the suggestion, but eventually all grumbled out an apology. It wasn’t a particularly good one, but fixing their mistake gave them extra points, so Sans accepted it with no small amount of amusement. Besides, what was important was that the snowman accepted, and given the smile on its face, it had been indeed.

“well, since that’s settled, you guys can skiddaddle if you want. it was ice to meet you.”

Most of the teens quickly left, probably wanting to get away from gross feelings and other such things. However, the Snowdrake remained, looking jittery. Sans tilted his head, trying to keep himself open.

“did you want to say something else?” He asked in a friendly manner, doing his best to smile gently.

The Snowdrake still startled despite his efforts to not freak the kid out, but alas.

Snowdrake awkwardly shuffled about while Sans picked Flowey back up in the meantime, and finally, spoke up with eyes firmly on the ground.

“Um…” He nervously started, and Sans patiently waited.

“I’ve um…never met someone as nice as you. Except my mom…” The young monster’s face fell slightly, and Sans smiled sympathetically.

“And your jokes are really good! Like hers!” He blurted, looking embarrassed at his outburst but not taking it back. Sans developed a wistful expression on his face, knowing what had happened to his mother, but also glad the kid was willing to open up. 

“heh… well thanks.” He hummed, thinking. “i just hope it’ll help you put more good into the world, rather than make it worse.” The Snowdrake shifted awkwardly, probably thinking back at all the stuff he’s most likely done while sinking under the crushing weight of his mother’s death.

“there’s a lot of stuff that sucks out there, believe me, i know. but…” Sans grinned genuinely at him, putting a hand on the kid’s head and ruffling his feathers.

“that doesn’t mean you gotta take it out on everyone else. heh, someone who can make the world a better place despite the hardship…now that’s a cool dude.”

The Snowdrake seemed to flush, eyes wide and nodding rapidly. Sans snorted when the kid eventually scampered off, and he called out behind him.

“just stay out of trouble, kay?” 

He didn’t get a clear response, but Sans heard what he thought was some sort of scwacky agreement. Huffing out a noise of amusement, he glanced down at the flower in his hands who rolled his eyes.

“Right, add ‘charm stupid teenagers’ to your list of skills.” Sans just raised a brow, scoffing lightly and shaking his head. 

“Excuse me…” Sans then heard a soft voice behind him, one he recognized to be the snowman’s. He turned around, gently grinning and walking up snowy figure, who managed to be even smaller than him.

“what can i do for ya, pal?” He asked.

The snowman looked uncertain for a moment, but seemed to make up his mind soon enough.

“Well…I have always wanted to know what it is like beyond this place, even though I cannot leave. I have been afraid of what I might see but…if it would be alright, could you take a piece of me with you? I think…even if I saw bad things, they’d turn out alright as long as I was with you.”

Sans wasn’t entirely sure what to say for a second, he was…rather touched by such trust. But he eventually nodded lightly.

“sure, course. no problem.” Sans reached out and took a small clump of magic infused snow from the snowman, and carefully put it in his inventory.

“Also…if you ever find yourself in need, it is okay to use it. It will heal you. I will not be upset.”

Sans regarded the snowman’s kind suggestion with a slow shake of his head.

“nah, don’t worry about it. i’m a pro, this piece is makin’ it a long ways, kay?” Sans winked at the snowman, who smiled quite warmly, despite everything.

“If you say so.”

Oh well, he had probably made poor Papyrus wait long enough, because ahead of them was the electricity maze. Sans was…not really looking forward to it. He didn’t mind seeing the alternate version of his brother, far from it really, but…

Puzzles huh…

Sans definitely wasn’t bad at them at all, however he was admittedly a little nervous about the nature of these puzzles. It was very possible they were much more difficult or simply more punishing then the puzzles that his brother had made were. And since Red would literally be right there it would be very difficult to sneak something under his nose such as a shortcut or a little blue magic.

…Nothing for it, he supposed. Sans would just have to do this human style (and perhaps ask Flowey for assistance.)

Sans could sense his brother’s presence from a mile away, although if he was asked, he would say that this particular Papyrus’ magic felt a little more…spikey, then usual.

Sure enough, Sans spot both Red and Papyrus standing across the way. In front of them was the usual ground cleared for the maze, and around the perimeter was a large ring of spikes. Sans got the feeling this Papyrus was more than a little obsessed with them. Distantly, he could hear the two skeletons talking. Red was impossible to really make out because in comparison to Papyrus, he was incredibly quiet. However, he could hear Papyrus excitedly talking about something to do with Undyne.

When they heard Sans approach, Papyrus was at immediate attention, crossing his arms and doing his best to do an intimidating and cool pose. Like he hadn't just been ranting about his cool friend Undyne. Red…didn’t do much, not until Papyrus snapped at him to at least stand straight, which he did so reluctantly.

“SO THE HUMAN APPROACHES.” Papyrus seemed to be doing his best to put on a scary persona, it wasn't too bad even, though it was entirely ineffective on Sans.

“I AM THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS!! YOU WOULD BE WISE TO REMEMBER IT”

Sans tried to suppress the grin on his face (an impossible task since he just naturally grinned all the time still.) to look appropriately awed; he was entirely certain he failed.

“wow, that’s pretty impressive.”

Papyrus puffed up in barely contained joy, pridefully doing his signature laugh, with a significantly more villainous sound.

“INDEED!!” Papyrus looked down at the pot in his hands, obviously recognizing the flower. Flowey didn’t have any particularly negative reaction towards Papyrus, maybe just a tad wary.

“AND I SEE YOU ARE ACQUAINTED WITH FLOWEY AS WELL.” He observed.

“sure am, we’re real good buds, we met through the grapevine. and it’s ice to meet you, too.” Sans couldn’t help himself. He watched as Papyrus’ face turned blank, then gradually morphed into incredibly mortified. He pinched the bridge of his nose and stomped his foot into the ground once, which were fit with cool high heeled boots by the way.

“UGH, HUMANS TELL AWFUL JOKES TOO?!”

The skeleton next to Papyrus, who had up until this point stayed quiet, suddenly piped up beside him. “heh, shocking right?” 

Papyrus leveled his brother with an intensely venomous glare, it was much more intense then Sans was used to, so it took him aback a tad, even though it was not aimed at him specifically. 
However, even so, he could spot the reluctant fondness Papyrus always had after looking a bit harder, it was just buried deeper than usual.

“SANS.” Papyrus ground out, clearly incredibly peeved that his own brother was cracking jokes in front of the human of all people. Although they were different, Sans could still easily read such things.

Red was cowed a little (or rather, he made himself appear to be,) and shut up, but he still tossed Sans an amused smirk for his trouble.

Papyrus put a fist to his mouth and cleared his throat unnecessarily, obviously trying to get the mood back under control.

“AHEM, HUMAN. THIS AREA IN FRONT OF YOU IS THE DEADLY INVISIBLE ELECTRICITY MAZE!”

Sans took a good look at it. At first glance, it would appear there was nothing there, but with a keen magical eye, it was easy to spot where the walls of electricity were. Actually, even just from a human standpoint, he could vaguely feel the warmth coming from the area in front of him. 

He realized quietly that actually, this kind of puzzle would be incredibly easy. Most electricity down here was converted directly from magic, and this was no different. With sharp enough senses he could tell where the electric field was and where it wasn’t. Of course, the other electricity field had just put up sensors and used the orb as a medium, so this puzzle actually was different in that respect too.

So…this puzzle would be super easy for him, then. He kind of felt bad…

He was drawn out of his considerations by Papyrus, who was gloating.

“MWAH HAH HAH HAH HAH! INTIMIDATED? IT’S ONLY UNDERSTANDABLE. BUT HAVE NO FEAR, IT WILL NOT HURT…TOO MUCH.”

Sans caught Red rolling his eyes (or eye, since he still only had the one red eye out.) He for one, thought Papyrus’ intimidation game was rather…cute, for lack of a better word. But maybe that was just his brotherly instincts talking. To the average human, it may be somewhat intimidating, but also pretty goofy.

“Hey.” Sans heard Flowey whispering.

He subtly glanced down while Papyrus continued to go on with various intimidating and fearsome phrases.

“Do you need help with this? I watched him make this, and I’m pretty sure it’s the same.” Flowey offered. Sans probably would have taken him up on it before, but now he was pretty sure he had it covered. If someone asked how exactly he did it, he’d just refer to Flowey.

“nah, i think i got it. just gotta branch out the ole’ senses.” Flowey just raised a brow, but otherwise said nothing.

Finally, it seemed that Papyrus was wrapping up, and Red over there looked about ready to fall asleep. Somewhat, anyways, Sans was certain he was still keeping an eye-socket on him.

“AHEM, WELL, YOU MAY TRY YOUR HAND AT IT HUMAN.”

Sans tilted his head and tried to concentrate. It occurred to him now that his magic did feel a little different then before. It was difficult to pinpoint, but if he had to describe it, he’d say it felt…heavier. He wasn’t really sure what to make of it, but whatever changed, it made pinpointing magical signatures a bit easier.

After he felt like he had a good reading of the area, He began to walk forward. He took it at a slow and sedated pace. After a few steps, he heard a sharp noise behind him, which were revealed to be spikes once he turned his head to look. It would appear that they would pop up as he went along. It seemed like a pretty useless feature aside from being scary, so Sans just ignored it completely. 

He could feel Papyrus watching him incredibly carefully, increasing in intensity as he easily traversed through the maze. When he finally got to what should have been the end, Sans abruptly stopped, because there was definitely a field in front of him that wasn’t there before.

A little confused, he looked up at Papyrus.

He looked…nervous. Sans glanced down and noticed that Papyrus was hiding something behind his back. After a moment of staring at each other, he understood.

Papyrus changed the puzzle on the fly (a clever feature to add Sans thought.) probably because he was anxious about the human literally just walking through the maze without issue and not getting zapped at all. He had hardly even considered such underhanded tricks to be something Papyrus was capable of, but Sans still found it reluctantly amusing. It was mostly reluctant because he literally couldn’t get through like this.

“ya know, i couldn’t help but notice that uh…there’s no door here.” 

The skeleton startled quite badly, but seemed to be trying to hide it.

“WHAT?! HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW??”  He sputtered.

In all fairness, most monsters didn’t have quite the sensitivity to magic that he did. Part of it was from his absurd quantity of magic, as well as…experience. And of course…he was human, so genuinely sensing the electric fields was probably not something that would even remotely be considered.

However, Sans needed to say something, so he just put a hand on his hip and said with full confidence,

“it was the vibes.” 

Papyrus needed a moment to process.

“WHAT.”

“it was the vibes, i can just tell that there’s no door here.”

“Y-YOU HAVE NO PROOF!!” Papyrus accused, but Sans just closed his eyes and shook his head dismissively.

“the proof is in the vibes.”

“URGH, JUST WALK FORWARD DAMN YOU!!” Papyrus stomped his foot into the ground, and Red next to him looked quite amused. Sans did too, but he hid it.

“nope. zap my willpower all you want, i’m not moving until there’s a door.”

To emphasize his point, Sans plopped down onto the ground (although it was cold, the electric fields around him actually made it a little warmer) and sat, perfectly willing to wait. He was entirely confident that he had more patience than both Papyrus and Red.

Poor Papyrus looked completely flabbergasted, turning to his brother in frustration.

“SANS HE CAN’T JUST DO THAT!!”

Red just rolled his eyes, blatantly unconcerned.

“obviously he can. you’re the one who removed the door in the first place.” Sans’ counterpart pointed out, eyeing the remote now clearly visible in Papyrus’ hand from when he was waving them about. Of course, the tall skeleton immediately noticed and rushed to get it back behind him, glaring venomously at his brother’s attitude.

“I DID NOT!! AND HE’S A CHEATER!”

“takes one to know one.”

Papyrus growled at him and gave up arguing.

They waited. And waited. And waited some more. Sans almost laid down to take a nap, but Flowey stopped him because apparently he’d catch a cold or something, whatever that was.

Before finally…

“oh hey, a door. cool.” 

Before Papyrus could change his mind, Sans quickly stepped through, grinning widely with the apparent satisfaction of a puzzle well done.

“nice maze, it was seriously electrifying, maybe add more doors next time though.” 

Papyrus did not dignify him with a response, immediately stomping off with a strong glower.

Now he and Flowey were left alone with Red.

“huh, wonder what he’s mad about.” Sans commented innocently, the wide grin on his face doing him no favors.

“didn’t get to see an electrified human, a real shame.” his counterpart hummed, with a vaguely nasty look on his face.

“huh, you’ve wanted to electrocute me twice now, are you a sadist or something, Red?” Funnily enough, his counterpart shot him a dark look, obviously perturbed but too lazy to do much more.

“you’re still on with that?” He grumbled, and under his breath refuted Sans’ claim of sadism.

“yuuuup!” Sans smiled brightly and popped the ‘p’ at the end, finding the motion with his new lips both incredibly weird but somehow kind of satisfying. It was just really amusing to mess with…well, himself. Although it wasn’t actually him, and that’s part of what made it so funny.

...was he the masochist here?

Ignorant to Sans' weird thought, Flowey grinned underneath him, shooting Red a smug look.

“It’s a pretty fitting name though, Red.” Sans and Flowey shared an incredibly cheeky look. The look the skeleton shot them was just too funny not to laugh at. It appeared Sans' laughter took the wind out of his counterpart’s sails and his shoulders just drooped, letting out a big sigh.

“whatever…” It would appear he had finally accepted his newly-given name, or at least, he wouldn’t complain too much anymore.

“by the way…” Sans began, remembering the thing he had told Frisk right here before, and now curious about the new answer.

“where did papyrus get that super cool outfit?” 

Red blinked in mild surprise at the topic change, but just shrugged with the wisp of a happy grin on his face.

“we made it for the day papyrus applied to the guard. said he needed a ‘battle body’ or something like that.”

That was different from what his answer had been. He supposed there were no costume parties going on around here, huh? A shame.

"did he make it in?"

Red shrugged, a proud expression slowly making its way onto his face.

“not at first, but papyrus is a determined guy, he made his way up and eventually won em’ over. heh…even got a useless sack of shit like me a job as a sentry.”

Sans blinked but otherwise didn’t react. He was a little weirded out by the swearing coming from…himself, as Sans almost never did (save for some very special occasions.) And if Papyrus ever heard him use that kind of language towards himself—to put himself down? Well, he’d never hear the end of it. His bro was so cool...

A somber mood suddenly took him over at the way his thoughts turned, too quickly for him to wrangle the homesick feelings away. Being faced with crazy new experiences and encounters were an effective distraction, but he really missed his brother. And he really missed his peaceful Underground. 

Still, Sans couldn’t leave Red hanging, it was really cool that his brother made it into the guard, and he had to make that known.

“heh…that’s really cool. your brother’s cool.” 

Red appeared like he couldn’t decide whether to swell with satisfied agreement at Sans’ admission, or study the human's weird mood shift. Sans was great at keeping his expression hidden, and Red was obviously pretty good at reading people, so they balanced out into a limbo of uncertainty on both sides.

Flowey, apparently able to sense Sans’ mood despite not having a clear look at his face, saved him from this predicament.

“Let’s go, you’ll catch a cold if you just stand still in this weather.” Flowey told him, and his concern did indeed ring true, but Sans could tell he said it for a different reason that just a potential cold…again, whatever that was.

Either way, his interjection mostly snapped Sans out of his funk and allowed him to put a more convincing grin on his face towards Red, beginning to walk past the man.

“well, see ya up ahead when your brother’s tryin to kill me again.”

Sans gave the silent skeleton a little friendly wave and walked off.

Chapter Text

Sans was quite eager to find something to distract himself again, but unfortunately there wasn’t much to see past the electricity maze so far. There was no nice cream stand, no one selling fried snow, and—from what he could tell—the golf mini game was in total disrepair. 

He walked forward slowly while he took a good look around. It simply seemed…drearier than normal. The place where he distinctly remembered there being nice cream was empty, but in the snow Sans could spot signs that something had been there. He glanced around to see where it could have ended up, but the only place he could think for it to be was…

Sans carefully tip toed over to the edge of the cliff, and the closer he got the tenser Flowey got; he was most likely concerned that Sans would slip off the edge, but the former skeleton was entirely confident in his balance and his familiarity with the cliffs of Snowdin, so he paid it no mind. 

When Sans could finally peek over the edge, his unfortunate suspicion was confirmed—something that looked like an ice cream stand was in a down-right mess at the bottom of the cliff, clearly having been pushed off.

Sans wasn’t sure who was the culprit, but he’d like to give him a piece of his mind, or rather; annoy them with stupid pranks and jokes with an undercurrent of animosity until they started feeling the sins crawling on their backs.

It was a real shame.

“There used to be an ice cream stand here, but people harassed the guy working it out of business, and pushed it down the cliff.” Flowey explained, noticing Sans’ off-put expression.

“that’s real cold of them.” He said with a careful sort of casualness, biting back a sigh at the end.

“You didn’t actually want ice cream did you? In this weather?”

Sans tilted his head, a more normal grin replacing his previously disturbed smile. He kind of understood what Flowey was getting at, but given Sans was previously a skeleton and therefore rather ignorant to the woes of temperature, he couldn’t fully get it.

“well i did kinda wanna try it, maybe another time I guess.” He shrugged, Flowey sighing his usual exasperated sigh—it was a sound Sans was becoming very familiar with, much to his amusement.

“You’re already freezing on the outside, I really don’t need you to be freezing on the inside too.”

When the flower phrased it that way, Sans suddenly understood how eating something cold in cold weather might be…unpleasant. 

“yeah…uh, you’re probably right.”

Sans decided to set his sights on the snow golf instead…

which was entirely broken down it would seem. 

There were messy piles of snow everywhere, and the pole and flag were completely broken. He was pretty sure he could see it peeking out underneath some snow some ways away. If Sans hadn’t already known something had been here, he probably wouldn’t have noticed there was anything at all.

“what happened here?” Sans asked, since he assumed Flowey also probably knew. He made what seemed to be a shrug.

“The usual. I think Papyrus tried to fix it a couple times, but he eventually stopped bothering. More important stuff to do.” Flowey replied, giving the whole area a brief glance himself. His eyes narrowed at the stations off in the distance, which Sans knew to belong to the Dogi couple.

“Careful by the way, there are some other guards around this area, not sure where they are right now though…”

Sans nodded, but so far the coast was clear. There really wasn’t much to see, given it was so…empty. He did his best to shake off any uncomfortable feelings as he moved on into the next area.

And of course, just ahead of here was the place Papyrus had put aside for Sans’ own puzzle. Not that he ever really used it. The thought had been appreciated however. 

Sure enough, he could see both Red and Papyrus across the way, and honestly things looked almost entirely the same, save for what seemed to be a…magazine? Instead of a crossword search.

As he approached, he could hear Papyrus grumbling in a threatening tone.

“I SWEAR TO GOD SANS IF THERE’S NOTHING HERE…”
    
“ugh, i told you there’s something okay? get off my ass…”

Sans regarded their exchange with a slightly wry and bemused grin. Then, Papyrus noticed him.

“HMPH, THERE YOU ARE HUMAN. WERE YOU MEANDERING? I WOULD NOT RECOMMEND IT. YOU MAY ENCOUNTER SOMETHING…” Papyrus narrowed his eyes.

“UNPLEASANT.” He stated ominously, which admittedly gave him pause.

“AND IT WOULD BE A HASSLE TO HAVE TO RETRIEVE YOUR BODY OUT IN THE SNOW!”

Sans was entirely uncertain how to respond to such a thing coming from an alternate version of his brother..

“uh…nope, i’m uh…good. no retrieval necessary.” He said, trying to stop his eyebrows from arching upwards.

Papyrus moved on quickly, glaring at the skeleton beside him before crossing his arms and regarding Sans once again.

“HUMAN, THIS NEXT OBSTACLE WAS…DESIGNED…BY MY BROTHER, SANS. AND YOU BETTER BE CONFOUNDED, OR ELSE.”

That kind of sounded more like a threat towards the Sans in question, rather than him. Man, good thing he wasn’t that guy. Who could even imagine?

Sans tilted his head as he considered the…apparent trap in front of him. It looked like nothing, and he assumed it was nothing as well. He set Flowey onto the ground in front of him so he could have both hands free to flip through the magazine.

And it was a good thing, too, because nearly the instant he got close to it, Sans suddenly found the ground underneath him was no longer solid, and he fell.

To every observer it must have seemed like he vanished, so quickly it had happened. Sans was also somewhat embarrassed to say that he hadn’t fallen without a single peep—a small cry of surprise ended up escaping him.

Still…luckily, it was not a long fall at all, if he raised his hand up it could just barely reach the top. He made sure to wave a little so as to verify to the most likely worried flower that he was mostly okay, just with a heavily beating heart and a little dignity lost. No biggie.

“uh…i’m good.”

Sans could hear Papyrus stomp his foot, even though he could not see.

“UGH, SANS…THAT WAS A STUPID TRAP. AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN ADD ANY SPIKES?? WHAT’S EVEN THE POINT…” 

Thank goodness there were no spikes.

“hey, whaddya’ mean? the human’s totally captured. you’re just jealous that my trap worked.”

“I AM NOT!!!”

While his counterpart and alternate brother were arguing childishly, Sans considered how exactly he was going to get out without any shortcuts or blue magic. If he tried to crawl out, the snow would probably end up falling on top of him.

Thankfully, he didn’t have to consider it for too long, because some green vines began to snake their way down into the pit, carefully wrapping themselves around his waist and lifting him up. How handy, despite there being no hands involved.

With no small amount of smugness towards the skeletons, Sans flashed a grin in their direction as he was rescued by his little flower pal. He even reached out and snatched up the magazine for good measure.

Of course, Sans got a lecture from Flowey after he was deposited next to his pot, but he didn’t mind.

“welp…” Red said while Papyrus was confounded into silence.

“WH- YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT!!”

Sans chuckled, dusting off the snow that had fallen on him and looking back at the two brothers with a raised brow.

“what? did you just expect him to sit there while you captured me?” Flowey crossed his leaves and gave Papyrus a stare, agreeing with Sans’ assessment in a way that made it obvious that there was no way he was letting that happen.

Papyrus seemed lost for words, fuming with frustration.

“GRR…FINE!! I’LL JUST CAPTURE YOU WITH ONE OF MY OWN PUZZLES ANYWAYS!”

Again, Papyrus stomped away darkly, off to prepare even more japes to capture him with. Red—as usual—just stayed behind while his brother left.

Well…that had been much more eventful than Sans had thought it would be.

“This is why I tell you to be careful, you know…” Flowey grumbled from the ground, eyeing him with a glare.

Sans grinned back down at the flower sheepishly, at least a little apologetic.

“heheh…whoops.” 

Flowey scoffed. “Yeah. Whoops.” 

Taking a deep breath in and out, Flowey seemed to be attempting to calm himself down from an ordeal. Sans supposed that sudden fall caused the poor flower quite a bit of anxiety.

“What’s even in that stupid magazine anyways?” He asked in a tired voice after having regained a bit of zen.

Sans blinked, just now remembering about the magazine in his hand. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his counterpart’s grin widen.

And when Sans actually took a good look at the magazine, he realized why immediately.

“oh my god-” 

On the cover was a very under-dressed human woman, and when Sans took a small peek on the inside, they were even more under-dressed. Extremely.

Sans closed the book immediately, looked up, and pierced Red with an incredibly disappointed stare; which only seemed to make him laugh. Sans wasn’t offended, but it was pretty juvenile…not that he was one to talk.

“seriously? a porno mag?” Sans would ask where he even got it, but he already knew. He had encountered some himself before, and he had a somewhat amusing memory of frantically snatching one out of Papyrus’ hands when they had gone to the dump a long time ago. Plus, he remembered spotting something similar in the depths of Alphys’ collections.

Flowey choked and made a face towards Red too, but seemed rather unsurprised.

“Ugh…”

“what? don’t like it? that’s a pretty good find down here ya know.” Red wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, causing Sans to groan and cover his face, but he couldn’t help being amused too. The grin was creeping up his face again.

“you can have it back now…” Sans chucked the magazine into the air. It obviously wasn’t anywhere close to getting to the skeleton across the way, but he was confident it would appear in Red’s hands regardless, which it did.

“jeez, be careful with that. it’s a priceless item.” 

Flowey scoffed while being picked up, shooting Red a narrow look.

“Yeah right…” He muttered.

Sans was for once in agreement, despite still finding it kind of funny. Being the straight-man for this particular joke felt more correct.

Before Sans passed Red by yet again, a question occurred to him out of the blue.

“...by the way, random question—which do you find harder, crossword or junior jumble?”

His counterpart looked at him as if he had a screw loose.

“...crossword. duh.” 

Sans nodded in agreement, a cheeky grin stretching across his face even though Flowey was shooting him an incredibly baffled look.

“heheh…right. figured.”

Sans left Red to puzzle on the purpose of that question and moved on into the next area.

There was a paper bag on the ground with a note next to it. The bag kind of looked frozen in the snow, even from here.

A save point also made itself known the instant he got close, which Sans quickly used to get the process over with. He still didn’t really like it. Even though at the same time it felt so so familiar.

After doing that, he figured he’d reach down and pick up the note, giving the paper bag a curious glance while he did so. It read:

“HUMAN, IT WOULD BE NO FUN TO DO BATTLE WITH TRAPS AND JAPES WHEN YOU ARE SO WEAK FROM HUNGER YOU CAN HARDLY STAND. SO EAT. AND FEEL GRATEFUL TO HAVE MY MASTERFUL CUISINE. -SIGNED, THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS.”

Sans snorted quietly and stashed the note away in a pocket, looking at the apparent food it described. He crouched down and peaked into the plain brown bag; part of him was expecting spaghetti, but he was instead met with a very cold and hard looking chunk of lasagna.

“huh…” 

Flowey scrunched up his nose when he had a look too, sticking a tongue out in disgust despite being a flower.

“Ugh, not that lasagna…Don’t eat it, trust me.”

Sans tilted his head.

“is it poisoned?” He inquired, part of him thinking that it may be par for the course around here, but Flowey shook his head.

“No…but it may as well be.” 

That was pretty in line for Papyrus really, and that bit of similarity made him smile, even if it was painfully nostalgic. Still, he probably wouldn’t eat it. He didn’t really want to imagine what it would taste like with a proper tongue and taste buds.

Sans tried to pick up the bag out of curiosity, but when he tried, it was abruptly ripped right from the ground, the bottom apparently being completely frozen solid into the ground. The lasagna too, was attached to the floor.

"welp..."

Seemingly attracted by the smell and sound, Sans then heard a squeak from just up ahead; a small, skrunkly mouse quickly scurried over. 

He watched as the mouse approached cautiously. It looked up at him with its little beady eyes and Sans got a general idea of what it wanted, so he did his best to give the little thing a friendly smile, which was something he was pretty good at. The little guy looked grateful at the silent exchange, and so then tried to bite into the food…

But was sorely disappointed when it was found to be frozen solid.

Sans…felt a bit bad for it. Hm…if he could at least unfreeze the lasagna…

After thinking for a moment, Sans had an idea. He set down Flowey and put his hands around the frozen lasagna instead. He glanced around to make sure no one was watching except the flower, and then, let magic permeate around his hands.

Now, Sans could not use fire magic or anything like that, but he was fully capable of heating up his magic. When energy increased, it usually got hotter, after all. And his blasters did kind of toast things…

Into non-existence. But that was beside the point.

Slowly, the mouse watched with both confusion and anticipation as the lasagna thawed, and eventually after enough time, it was unfrozen enough to be eaten. It probably wasn’t hot, but it was enough.

Him and Flowey watched as the mouse ran around in a circle excitedly. It then stopped, sniffed, and took a big chomp of the lasagna…

And promptly collapsed, twitching.

“oh no-” Sans blurted, jittering with nervous energy at the sudden collapse, and unsure of what to do with his hands. He quickly shuffled over to the mouse and gave it a gentle poke. 

Thankfully, it appeared to be alive. While he breathed out a sigh of relief, Flowey snapped at him from behind.

“Don’t just leave it there!” 

Right, he probably shouldn’t let it lie in the snow while passed out due to the Lasagna From Hell.

He carefully scooped up the little rodent, quickly running over to the small mousehole in the wall across from them. Sans was thankful his hands were quite small, as he was able to easily place the mouse inside without too much trouble.

That was a relief, but…wouldn’t the mouse still be hungry? 

Then Sans remembered. 

He didn’t have any substantial food, but he did still have a piece of monster candy in his inventory, seeing as he had grabbed three of them at the time. He gingerly took it out and placed it inside the hole right next to the mouse before finally standing up and returning to Flowey. They sat there in silence for a few long moments.

“well…that was…interesting.”

“More like you almost killed that rat.”

“i did not…besides, that’s a mouse, not a rat.”

Flowey just rolled his eyes. When Sans looked back at him, he wondered…what did Flowey think about what he just did? He had used magic, but Flowey had yet to say anything. He supposed his shortcuts were also categorized as magic, so using a bit of it to heat something up was not too out of place, but…

Well, if Flowey was not going to mention it, he would not either.

Sans considered trying to discard the obviously dangerous piece of lasagna, but he was certain it would freeze over again quickly enough anyways. Therefore, he didn’t bother. 

Finally, they moved into the next area, but Sans had hardly taken a few steps forward before a gray figure pounced at him with incredible speed. Thankfully, his keen senses and instincts allowed him to easily sidestep the would-be assassination attempt. 

Couldn’t he get at least one break from all this excitement?

When he turned and got an opportunity to face his attacker, he saw that it was Lesser Dog, if…significantly more feral looking. It still had a dumb look on it’s face, but it was slobbering an inordinate amount while running on all fours. The spear had apparently been discarded some time ago.

“huh… any clue how to deal with this?” Sans decided to ask while yet again dodging an over excited and very dangerous leap. Flowey blinked, then quickly nodded with a grimace.

“Somewhat…he actually just wants you to pet him, but…”

But with his over excitedness it made it nearly impossible, right…

Sans let out a sigh, but retained his grin.

“right, let’s do this then.”

Theoretically, it would be very easy to just freeze the dog in place and go ham, but although Flowey was already very aware of many of his magical capabilities…well, something in him still hesitated.

He figured that he’d go the slightly less lazy route instead. He waited until Lesser Dog was getting ready to pounce yet again, and when he did, Sans only took a small step to the side. After that the dog would need time to orient himself again, but Sans never gave him the chance.

Without mercy, he ruthlessly assaulted the dog…

With copious amounts of pets and scratches, of course.

Lesser Dog immediately went stiff with pure shock, as if trying to process what was happening. 

However, it didn’t take long for him to completely flop over and desperately wriggle in pure delight in the pursuit of receiving more and more affection. Unfortunately, the rapid and wild movements kind of knocked Sans’ feet from underneath him.

“oof-” Winded, but unharmed, he let out a wheezing sigh before quickly setting Flowey down a little ways away (which actually included a subconscious shortcut to gain said distance—whoops) to achieve the highest petting efficiency. It was kind of dangerous, trying to pet with the dog’s legs flying about with enough force to bruise, but he managed.

While being beaten repeatedly in the side by an incredibly fast moving tail, Sans eventually petted enough that by the time the dog became satisfied, its neck had long since taken the face of the dog out of the realm of visibility. 

Ah, such was the nature of petting dogs.

Overall, it was an easy enough Spare, if you didn’t account for the brutalization he received due to the excited wrigglings of an over-enthusiastic dog.

He snatched Flowey back up, and…well, as for the puzzle around here? He just skipped it. No hard feelings, right Papyrus? He was sure it was amazing, incredible, and extremely deadly, and it was definitely a shame he didn’t have the time to do it, 100%.

Although he did get a bit of karma for his laziness when he was faced with Dogamy and Dogaressa immediately after. Darn. Well, he had already resolved to try and help out as many monsters as he could, anyways.

That being said, this dog couple looked much rougher than usual. Their axes were massive, and Sans could sense the LOVE coming off of them, despite his best efforts to keep it out of his mind. His unique karmic abilities were both extremely helpful and extremely uncomfortable down here. He had tried to ignore it so far, but a disconcerting amount of monsters had at least a little EXP to their name. Perhaps Papyrus did too, but Sans had up until now been so resistant to knowing that he had very, very carefully avoided finding out, even though it was a massive hassle.

Well…either way it didn’t change what he had to do. He was going to Spare the heck out of these guys.

The dogs shuffled in close, right into his personal bubble. Both he and Flowey tensed slightly as they sniffed him. It was, uh, kind of uncomfortable, but he figured it would be smarter to just stay still. They sniffed, then paused…then seemed to start arguing amongst themselves?

“(It smells like a human…but also…not???)”

“(Smells like magic…and flowers.)”

Oh, apparently his dual wielding was causing them confusion. Human, but also lots of magic? Yeah, he would probably be confused too.

Sans just shrugged.

“well, if it helps clear things up, i’m not not not not a human.”

Sans ignored the deadpan expression Flowey was shooting him.

The dogs froze as they tried to wrap their minds around what he just said, but it seemed too much for them. They gave up and swung their axes at him in a clean and coordinated motion, which Sans ducked under.

“(Grr…Let’s just kill him!)”

“(Undyne would kill us if we accidently let a human go.)”

“(Or even just an extremely cheeky monster…)”

Welp…

Flowey rolled his eyes, and under his breath Sans could hear him mutter, “Idiot…”

Sans grinned just slightly at the comment before slipping aside another coordinated swing from the dogs. Dodging two opponents with massive weapons was much trickier, but ultimately he managed. Being small kind of helped a little too.

All that being said, if he kept going like this, he was seriously going to wear himself out.

“any ideas on how to deal with these guys?” Sans asked, stepping forward into a shortcut behind the dogs, which thoroughly befuddled them for a few moments.

Flowey frowned. “If you rolled around in the snow you could probably throw off your scent and…well, pet them probably. But…” Flowey didn’t seem to like that idea, and neither did Sans. Aside from it being very cold, he also wasn’t exactly keen on getting his clothes dirty. Normally he wouldn’t care, but although what he wore right now was actually just an adjusted approximation of his old attire, it was still a remnant of his world.

“right, not a pupular plan.” Sans considered the situation while he dodged a slew of bullets sent his way. They were much stronger than how he remembered them.

Let’s see... It felt a bit like cheating at a puzzle, but he had weird deja vu about the methods Frisk had used, somehow it just felt like they were swimming in the back of his mind. Sans was not above cheating in the slightest however, so there was no problem here.

Before, the human had tricked them into thinking they were getting pet by another dog, which opened their eyes. With these dogs however, it was a little more tricky. There was no way for him to get close the normal way, and there was no guarantee they would let him pet them even if they thought he was a dog, or even come to the conclusion that he was a dog in the first place. So how could he get them off his back?

Well…he’d just have to show them you could pet other dogs by force.

Sans whispered a request to the flower in his hands, who blinked in confusion, but quickly and easily agreed to do what he was asked. Sans appeared behind them yet again, and without any preamble two large vines shot out of the pot. Sans was kind of interested how so much vine could come out of such a small pot, but he chalked it up to magic.

The vines wrapped themselves around the leg of each dog, and with a little help from Sans, pulled their feet out from under them. They both slipped and landed on their stomachs with a big (“oof!”), completely winded.

Grinning, Sans crouched and grabbed an arm in each hand, crossing them over and putting one hand on each head. He even gave both a wiggle for extra measure.

The dogi froze for a moment. But, they slowly began to pet, and Sans could practically sense the cogs turning in their head.

“(You can pet other dogs?!?!)”

“(What a discovery!!)” 

It was such a groundbreaking discovery, that they had completely forgotten about Sans’ presence for a few moments. But afterward they both turned to him in unison, still sitting. Rather than the dark and intimidating looks on their faces from before, they now looked enlightened and grateful.

“(Whatever you are, thank you for helping us realize this!)”

“(Hopefully we won’t get in trouble for letting you go.)”

Sans chuckled, happy to have the situation resolved. He hated seeing those hardened looks on some of his old pals.

“no problem, glad we can let bybones be bybones.” It was a terrible one, he knew because Flowey let out a groan.

The dogs barely seemed to register it; perhaps they were too used to Red, or maybe they just didn’t catch it, either way, they nodded their heads quickly and stood up up together.

“(You can go this way.)”

“(Just make sure you watch out for Papyrus.)”

“(Uh, don’t tell him we warned you.)”

Sans waved his hand to dismiss their concerns.

“s’no problem, catch ya later.” He waved them goodbye and began to walk away. However, before he left he gained a thoughtful look on his face, and then—an incredibly cheeky grin.

“just so you know, i really am not not not not not not a human.” he said, leaving them thoroughly confused as he finally left the scene. 

It was a few long seconds of walking and silence until,

“..not not…not- hey! That ends in a positive!” Flowey suddenly spoke up.

“well…lyin’s bad, right?” 

He merely received a terrible groan in response, which was exactly the sort of reaction Sans loved.

Up ahead he spotted Papyrus just across the spikes that stood in the way, which was not surprising to him at all. He appeared to be distracted and glowering about…something, but Sans wasn’t entirely sure what. Although he supposed it being about his lack of being captured could have something to do with it. Eventually though, as he approached, Papyrus took notice of him.

“HMPH, IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH!...DID YOU EAT? YOU MUST KEEP YOUR STRENGTH UP HUMAN!”

…Now that he thought about it, maybe he really should have tried a little harder to discard the lasagna. He wanted to lie, but he kind of felt like this Papyrus would get mad at him if he caught him in it by checking that room.

“uh…sorry, i…” His eyes drifted around as he thought of something to say.

“i…don’t like oregano, so i uh, couldn’t stomach it, sorry.” That joke was kind of lost seeing as he really did have a stomach now, but…well, habits die hard.

Luckily Papyrus didn’t seem too mad, mostly just extremely peeved.

“HUMAN!! YOU CANNOT BE SO PICKY! YOU MUST NOT TURN UP YOUR NOSE AT WHATEVER FALLS ON YOUR PLATE!” 

Sans scratched the back of his head sheepishly, but he still couldn’t wipe the grin off his face regardless. Luckily he wasn’t too hungry at the moment, and he still had basically an entire pie in his pocket if he really got desperate. He could go for some Grillby’s though…Maybe Red would deign to take him there at some point.

“my bad. i’ll try to open my mind to the pastabilities next time for sure.”

The constipated look on Papyrus’ face right then was priceless.

“URGH!!! WELL!! I SUPPOSE IF YOU ARE WELL ENOUGH TO MAKE STUPID JOKES I WILL DISREGARD MY CONCERN!” Papyrus seemed extremely offended.

“IF YOU ARE SO CONFIDENT, THEN I WOULD LIKE TO SEE YOU SOLVE THAT PUZZLE!!”

Sans glanced down at the puzzle; it looked entirely identical to how he remembered it.

“YOU MUST TURN THOSE X’S INTO O’S AND HIT THAT BUTTON! BUT IF YOU CANNOT DO IT IN UNDER 5 SECONDS…” Papyrus began to cackle in manical delight.

“THEN YOU WILL BE SPEARED BY SPIKES! THINK YOU CAN HANDLE IT WHILE WEAK FROM LACK OF LASAGNA?!”

Sans was entirely certain that eating the lasagna would have made his chances much much worse, but he did not say that. He mostly ignored Papyrus’ incessant evil laughter and monologue and tilted his head towards the puzzle. He supposed doing it in under 5 seconds could be a little tricky…if you played fair, anyways.

Sans walked over to the button and set Flowey down next to it, who seemed to understand his intentions immediately, given his nod and the way a vine creeped out of the pot to rest itself on the button.

While Papyrus was still rambling on (seriously, he didn’t recall his brother droning on quite this much) Sans approached the two X’s separated by mounds of snow. The idea was that you had to go around them, but…

Well, Sans just stepped on one, crawled over the snow, and landed on the second X. Immediately, Flowey pressed the button, and they finished it in an easy 2 seconds. Teamwork makes the dream work, as they say.

Papyrus hadn’t even noticed, only realizing the puzzle was done by the time Sans was walking past him to move on.

“WHAT. WAIT. HEY! YOU CHEATED!!” 

Sans shrugged; edgy Papyrus sure liked to resort to accusations of cheating, huh?

“don’t recall there being any anti-teamwork rules set up in the non-existent contract, unless I missed that in the fine print?”

Papyrus glared at him, and even though it was not as intense as the ones he had directed towards Red, he still had to fight back a slight flinch since he was just not used to it.

Flowey rolled his eyes. “Papyrus, can you really complain about us playing dirty when you do the exact same but worse?” The flower accused.

The skeleton looked positively outraged, but something about him also seemed ever so slightly insecure.

“I DO NOT PLAY DIRTY! MY PUZZLES AND TRAPS ARE EXTREMELY DANGEROUS AND EXTREMELY FAIR!!”

As much as Sans loved Papyrus (even an alternate one), he was gonna have to disagree there.

“hm…if you sure…” 

Papyrus just huffed and puffed in frustration, yet again stomping away. It seemed to be a regular thing for him, but this time Sans followed right behind him, although much slower.

“so…what’s up next?” He asked, unable to really keep up with Papyrus properly without jogging a little.

Papyrus stopped and seemed to hesitate, looking forward. Sans followed his gaze and while his grin remained, his eyes widened.

It was an X’s and O’s puzzle just like last time, but it was…well, incredibly dangerous looking. There were spikes, fire, electricity, and honestly, Sans was pretty sure there was no solution.

“WHILE I WAS WAITING FOR YOU…I DECIDED TO TRY AND ADJUST THIS PUZZLE TO MAKE IT MORE…FAIR.” Something about Papyrus’ guilty expression told Sans that he was right about there being no painless solution.

“HOWEVER, I WAS UNABLE TO ADJUST THE OBSTACLES PROPERLY IN TIME…SO…”

Papyrus sighed and pulled out a remote, pressing a button to whisk all the incredibly dangerous features away.

How wonderfully customizable.

Sans was very glad to see all that taken away, but Papyrus let out a disappointed sigh. He clearly had wanted to keep the danger while making it more fair, but couldn’t do it in such a short amount of time.

“FOR THAT REASON, I WILL ALLOW YOU TO DO THE PUZZLE WITHOUT THE EXTRA FEATURES. BE GRATEFUL, BECAUSE I WILL NOT GO SO EASY ON YOU NEXT TIME!!”

Papyrus glared at him, pointing an accusing finger right in his face. Sans simply grinned.

“heheh…thanks. i ‘preciate it, br- pal.” Sans quickly corrected himself, determinedly preventing his grin from falling at the slip up.

Thankfully, Papyrus didn’t seem to notice at all, however it was very possible Flowey did…well, he just chose to ignore any possible reaction.

Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, Sans took a good look at the puzzle. It was different from the puzzle he was familiar with, but without the various dangerous implements, it wasn’t really much easier or harder. He circled around it a couple times to map it out, thought for a second to identify the correct path, and then finished. He tried to not just rush through it, since he didn’t want to hurt Papyrus’ pride any more than he already had.

Sans was very good at not rushing, though.

Papyrus looked vaguely annoyed, but not particularly upset or surprised that he finished.

“HM, SO YOU’VE FINISHED. WELL…I DID HAVE TO MAKE IT EASIER FOR YOU AFTER ALL.”

And the reason why he wasn’t upset was just because Papyrus was consoling himself with the knowledge that it was easier than before, of course.

Sans chuckled, and then caught a conniving and giddy look on the tall skeleton’s face.

“BUT DO NOT GET YOURSELF IN A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY, HUMAN. THE COMING CHALLENGES ARE THE MOST DIFFICULT YET!! NYAH HAH HAH HAH!!!”

Couldn’t say he was particularly looking forward to any tough challenges really. Before he could come up with any sort of reply however, Papyrus ran forward to prepare the next puzzle. He passed by Red on the way, and yelled at him, but it didn’t slow him down at all.

“hmm, got through that one pretty easily. well, he did turn off all the interesting bits after all.” Red smirked at him, shrugging. 

“made it completable? yep.” Well, it would have been completable, just not without a bit of damage.

“course, my bro is the fairest monster around.” Red said, and Sans could tell he was mostly being truthful there, although it was tinged with the irony of the rather unfair traps so far.

“he tries to be, anyways.” 

Sans had no doubts about that, even if Papyrus seemingly wasn’t always successful. He had even tried to feed him. (It was more like an assassination attempt, but Sans would give edgy Papyrus the benefit of the doubt.)

Red then gave a short dismissive wave and walked off, in the opposite direction of course.

“anyways, see ya up ahead. don’t die on the short walk there.” With that, Red was gone in his next blink.

It was very unsettling, even though he was well aware how hypocritical that was. 

He turned towards the room ahead and sighed, unsure of what the outcome would be, but not particularly looking forward to finding out.

Chapter Text

Sans remembered clearly what the puzzle ahead was. And given he had listened to Papyrus talk about it countless times, he had ended up memorizing the rules. Still…

He was not looking forward to it. 

Last time, he remembered that the puzzle had malfunctioned—due to Alphys’ intervention no doubt—but he had his doubts about Alphys doing the same thing here. Why would she? Sans had carefully avoided letting any of his weirdness show on camera, seeing as he knew all their positions already, (much to his Alphys’ frustration.) but he didn’t really think he had done anything much to gain her favor, aside from giving her a little smile through the ruins door camera of course.

Because of all that, the outcome of this puzzle was entirely unknown to him, and he really hated unknowns. This whole experience was a big massive bag of unknowns really, how exhausting.

And yet…he stepped forward anyways, instead of giving up like usual. Why? Well...

Because he was determined.

He tried to not feel disgust at the foreign sensation.

Dragging his feet along the way, Sans made his way across the small bridge and found the tile puzzle exactly how he remembered it in his memories. It was amazing how the only thing different was the two people standing across the way, and…the fact that he was the one in the human’s position.

“HUMAN!! YOU MAY HAVE BEEN ABLE TO GET THROUGH THE PUZZLES THUS FAR, BUT THIS PIECE OF PUZZLE-GENIUS WILL SCATTER YOUR HUBRIS INTO LITTLE TINY PIECES!! AND THEN SET THEM ON FIRE. WITH SPIKES.”

Well, no matter what—Papyrus was a riot.

“THIS PUZZLE WAS DESIGNED BY THE GREAT DR. ALPHYS! AND-” 

As he continued, Sans began to zone out. He already knew all the rules, and from what he did catch, they were exactly the same here. It was weird what stuff changed and what didn’t. Was there any rhyme or reason? Or was it a lack of universal creativity? Who was to say…

After what seemed like ages, (Sans was almost certain Edgy Papyrus monologued far more than his brother ever had.) it seemed like the show was finally on the road. Not that Sans was particularly happy about it.

“THAT’S THE RULES, HAS YOUR TINY HUMAN BRAIN ABSORBED IT? BECAUSE I WON’T EXPLAIN IT AGAIN!”

Papyrus let out a small maniacal laugh at his rather tame insult, which Sans couldn’t help but find amusing.

“uh, yep. this tiny human brain is at full capacity, but i think i got it.” Even if he hadn’t got it, he was entirely certain Flowey knew it too.

Papyrus seemed just a tad chagrined (perhaps because he hadn’t gotten the opportunity to turn down a request for a second explanation?) but otherwise continued on in full force. With the remote in hand, he exclaimed,

“THEN, I WILL ACTIVATE IT NOW! PREPARE YOURSELF.” Without any further ado, it was activated and the lights immediately began to flash. Sans was a little taken aback when he found himself needing to squint. The bright, flashing lights apparently kind of hurt his eyes, which had never been a problem before as a skeleton. He decided to just close his eyes and wait for it.

It was a few seconds later when he peeked open his eyes again, and…

Well it wasn’t exactly a straight shot to the end, but…The mix of lemon scented slippery tiles, water tiles, and pink tiles all stacked in a row made it pretty much feel the same. Awkwardly, he walked through the puzzle without needing to think about it at all.

When he reached the end, he looked up.

Papyrus looked like a hilarious mix of furious, confused, indignant, and also simply feeling nothing at all. He cut through the awkward silence with a massive sigh, he tossed the instructions into the air and let it float down as he turned and stomped away. As he went, he grumbled,

“Play it again if you feel like…”

Sans simply didn’t know what to say.

There was no way that was a natural random outcome, but he couldn’t really prove it. He hadn’t really thought he had gained the favor of Alphys, but now he wasn’t entirely certain.

“huh...pretty lucky result there, huh?” Red spoke up, face quite unreadable, but Sans thought perhaps he was considering something.

“uh, yep. never knew i was such a fortunate guy.” Hah, what a joke. He wouldn’t be here right now if he was lucky.

Red just shrugged, his grin increasing just slightly.

“by the way, that lasagna from earlier, it was actually slightly less deadly than usual, that’s pretty lucky, right?”

Sans doubted that very much, but who was he to say. 

“well tibia honest, i didn’t even get to eat it. i mean…it was completely frozen.”

Red seemed tickled by that pun but he also closed his eyes.

“really? i thought i saw a bite taken out of it. and it didn’t really look that frozen.”

Oh man, Sans really regretted not disposing of the lasagna when he had the chance; curse his own hubris! Of course, none of this showed on his face—very carefully, he made sure it didn’t. His human face was no doubt much more expressive than he was used to, so he had to make sure he paid it special attention.

“i guess the mouse finally found a way to heat it up then. not that it was very good for the mouse though anyways.”

Technically, it was not a lie.

Red’s face was hard to read, but he just shrugged and let it go.

“guess so, heh, surprised i didn’t see a little mouse corpse over there.”

Sans didn’t particularly want to imagine it, and he was pretty sure it showed on his face.

“well… it’s a good thing you didn’t. that sounds…unpleasant.” He remarked simply, not knowing how else to put it.

“anyways, i’ll catch ya later, red.” The Red in question rolled his eyes at the name, but no longer said anything about it.

Once they were clear of the skeleton, Sans sighed, thinking out loud to himself and the flower that was still in his hands.

“that puzzle was weird, was that kind of outcome really random?”

Flowey narrowed his eyes in thought, considering the issue himself.

“It’s not impossible I guess, but...that puzzle was made by Alphys, I wouldn’t be surprised if she had some control over it…she has her fingers in pretty much the entire Underground…but, why?”

Sans had the same question; why would she help him? Was it for the same reasons his Alphys had helped out the human? Or was it something else? Sans had a feeling there was at least something more to it. Everyone here was so different, she must have her own priorities.

“hm… well, no point thinking about it right now, right? it’s pretty much only a good thing.”

Flowey looked incredibly skeptical.

“That’s awfully optimistic of you.”

Sans didn’t have much else to say to that aside from a shrug and an amused grin. Although additionally, someone pinning him as an optimist was pretty funny too.

The next area looked like quite the train wreck, to say the least. There were piles of snow that looked like they had once had some sort of purpose, but it was all in complete disarray. Additionally, he saw frantic paw prints everywhere, which gave Sans a clue as to what did this. A standoffish deer monster stood off to the side, looking more than a little frazzled. When Sans approached, they seemed extremely cautious, but eventually relaxed just a tad when he didn’t do anything to harm them.

“A dog came through here earlier…it looked happier than I’d ever seen it before, but every time it tried to make something in the snow, it’d get too excited halfway through and ruin it by running around…”

That solved that. Sans amused himself with that image as he approached the nearby save point and used it.

The sliding X’s and O’s puzzle just ahead was also pretty simple, if with many more spikes and a more difficult solution. Flowey seemed nervous about him slipping off, and therefore was extremely tense in preparation to assist him, but Sans wasn’t worried. As he rested on one of the non-slippery tiles, he curiously peeked over the edge to see what was down there, much to Flowey’s chagrin.

“Do you have no self preservation?!”

Sans just grinned. “why be afraid of fallin’ when you got shortcuts?”

Flowey looked like he was going to argue back, but suddenly seemed like he couldn’t think of anything to say. It was true, after all.

“Still…”

Rolling his eyes, Sans continued his peeking over the cliff. From here, he could see what looked to be a massive snow fortress and snow Papyrus (with spikes) and…a lump of snow…

With just one spike on it. He was pretty sure Papyrus must have added it.

Soon enough however, even with the distraction, the puzzle was pretty easily solved. It was a pretty good puzzle though, thought it didn’t take him much time. Despite everything, this Papyrus definitely seemed to take his puzzles very seriously, if with much more deadliness.

After brushing some snow shaped like a spiky mace (very hardcore!) off his head, Sans glanced to his right. He was considering whether or not he should go down that way, despite knowing there was nothing much there.

“There’s nothing really down that way, except for a weird door…”

“have you ever been able to get through it?” Sans couldn’t even with shortcuts, but sometimes he felt like that weird white dog was hanging around it and coming from that direction, so maybe it had something to do with it, as strange as that was. However, all that being said, it was possible Flowey had found a way. Unfortunately…

“No, I’ve never found a way in…even from going underground.”

Sans was a little disappointed, but not surprised. Maybe it had something to do with humans? Curiosity got the better of him and he turned down the path despite not really expecting much. He simply felt obligated to take a look anyway.

He remembered though, that his counterpart was here. Red was there, giving him a lazy wink with his right eye. When Sans took his eyes off of him and passed, he was predictably right ahead of him. Still with that infuriating grin, even though now it was all sharp edges.

It was incredibly disconcerting, and Sans took some time to appreciate the effectiveness of his shortcut pranks, as he had never had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of one.

“are you stalkin’ me?” Red asked, brow arched in a falsely concerned expression.

“are you?” Sans replied immediately. Flowey also gave his counterpart the stink eye, obviously not keen on his creepy space-jumping antics. 

Besides, he was pretty sure Red was kind of stalking him. Not all the time, of course, (and luckily) but often enough to keep an eye on his activities. Sans was well aware of his own human stalking habits however, as well as the positions of Alphys’ cameras, so he hadn’t really gotten caught doing something weird as of yet.

Suddenly, a huffing snort sounded behind him—it was a Gyftrot, and it looked extremely angry. When Sans turned back around, Red was gone too.

He sighed.

Sans really wanted a break right now. And oh wow...Gyftrot looked even more terrifying than usual. He generally wasn’t the type to be phased by any type of monster, but even he had to admit that this particular one was really living up to the title right now.

He sidestepped a reckless and angry charge, various items (mostly trash) hanging from its horns. They weren’t even really decorations or anything funny, just trash and a couple obscene items, he also spotted a half open pack of cigarettes in the mess, weirdly enough.

Sans wanted to help the guy take the stuff off, but it was unsurprisingly difficult to get close, every time he did the monster would get even more angry and attack him relentlessly. He supposed they were afraid Sans was going to put even more stuff on, and although Sans was certainly not above pranks of that caliber, the junk and trash was really just going way too far.

“hey buddy, i kinda just wanna help you get that trash off, you don’t gotta attack me.”

“Don’t just assume he’s gonna be a brat like the rest of them!” Flowey added, and he just shrugged vaguely along with it. That didn’t really seem to convince the Gyftrot.

“Hmph, why would I believe you’d do a kind deed just from the goodness of your heart?! I’m not an idiot!”

Flowey shot the monster a dark look, but Sans interrupted anything he might have begun to say.

“well, what if I told ya i just wanted to make a trade?”

The monster paused at that, looking like they were giving it some thought. Around here, it seemed like doing nice things just for the sake of it was pretty darn suspicious. So, Sans would just pretend like he just wanted something out of it too if that was what it took.

“...Like what.”

Sans thought for a moment, since he wasn’t entirely sure. The only worthwhile item was the half used pack of cigarettes. Sans didn’t use them, the only experience he had was trying it once a long time ago…but either way, they were a pretty rare find in the Underground. Sans thought it was odd they ended up here, but perhaps they could be useful; it was mostly just a pretext for cleaning up Gyftrots antlers though anyways.

Sans really had to go through a whole lotta’ hoops just to be nice.

“those cigarettes. let me have em' and I’ll help ya out in return. how’z that sound?” Sans put on his very best ‘perfectly honest’ face. It was true that he honestly just wanted to help the guy out, after all.

The Gyftrot’s face shifted in understanding, it was evidently not a strange request. Sans was sure lots of monsters down here could appreciate the calming effects of the human-made death sticks.

“...Alright…But if you try anything…” Sans got a dangerous glare for his trouble, but he just chuckled casually.

“i won’t.”

Eventually, the Gyftrot cautiously agreed to the trade. Sans did his best to slowly remove the junk and trash so he didn’t startle the monster, it'd really suck if he was suddenly impaled after all. And finally, once he had taken everything else off, he picked up the packet of cigarettes too. They were pretty good quality despite everything, although it was still half empty. He thought about putting it in his pocket, but then recalled a distant memory about cigarettes really stinking up someone’s clothes, so he decided to just stick them in his inventory instead.

Once Sans was done, he slowly backed away again a fair distance. The monster almost looked…surprised. Perhaps because Sans had kept his word.

“Hmph…I guess you aren’t like those brats after all…” Cautiously, the Gyftrot went on his way, disappearing behind the cliffs.

“Rude. He didn’t even say thank you!” Flowey huffed, much more offended on Sans’ behalf than Sans would ever be himself. The flower then turned to him with a narrowed look on his face.

“You aren’t actually going to use those though, are you?” He asked suspiciously, referring to the pack of cigarettes now resting in his inventory. He just chuckled and shook his head.

“nah, no way. but they could come in handy, right?” Sans had very little interest in using them as a skeleton, much less as a human.

Flowey looked relieved, and appeared to agree with his assessment.

“Yeah, they could…although as for how they got here…” His face screwed up in distaste.

“Ugh, I could see it being those stupid teenagers.”

Sans could picture that too, although if that was the case, they obviously gave up after one round.

Finally, the way to the secret door was open to them. It looked much the same as Sans remembered. When he walked in, it was just as odd as usual. It felt a lot like waterfall, what with the sound of droplets falling, the mushrooms, the eerie yet relaxing glow. And yet at the same time, he could see no water, and he couldn’t identify where all of the light was coming from.

Not to mention, the big worn door that stood in front of him. The door itself was red…and yet everything else was the same. It was almost hilarious in it’s blatant contrast, and he wasn’t even sure why.

He looked around, messed with the mushrooms, and used both physical strength (which was very small) and magic to try and open the elusive door, but it would seem even in another universe it was as obstinate as always. It was almost comforting, in a way. Although the color kept him from forgetting where he was.

“Well…that was anti-climatic.” Flowey sighed, obviously holding some hopes for discovering something new. Alas, Sans could not provide.

“oh well…maybe you gotta do somethin’ special to make it open. like… shatterin’ the barrier.”

The flower’s brows raised to impossible incredulous heights.

“Uh, I doubt it.” 

Sans gave him one of his classic infuriatingly mysterious winks, although perhaps the effect was different on this face.

“hey, ya’ never know. guess we’ll just have to find out, huh?”

“...Huh? What’s that supposed to mean-”

Before he could finish, Sans took a shortcut away into a camera and skeleton blind spot ahead.

“DON’T DO THAT WHILE I’M TALKING!!”

“whoops.” It would seem Flowey had forgotten what he was asking in favor of being annoyed at his antics.

Back up ahead, there was supposed to be snow poffs, but unfortunately it would appear there was exactly none. There was merely an old and drafty looking doghouse. And blocking the way to the bridge was, of course…

Greater Dog. But they weren’t exactly how Sans remembered them. There was no funny business here; Greater Dog was standing in front of the path like they were made of stone, and they stood as tall as ever in their armor. But now, with all their usual doggish friendliness gone, it was much more intimidating than it normally was.

They didn’t attack, but when Sans tried to get by, he was immediately parried by a large and sharp looking spear.

He frankly wasn’t entirely sure what to do in the face of this resolute dog. He tried petting; it did not work. He tried throwing something; it did not work. He tried calling them over, and predictably; it did not work. Sans wasn’t really the type to get frustrated per say, but he was a tad exasperated. He threw his hand forward to indicate the very un-doglike dog.

“is that even a dog??” He asked the flower in his other hand, a bit disbelieving. Flowey frowned.

“I don’t usually see Greater Dog this, er...resolute…Perhaps something happened? Or Papyrus said something to him…” Sans sighed at that and considered the foe in front of them. He’d really like to just go around the dog peacefully. So far, there was one thing he had not tried, something that had never failed him before…

He looked at Flowey and thought for a few long moments.

Finally, he gave a big, deep sigh.

There was really no point hiding anything at this point, he may as well just get it over with.

He put his hand behind his back to hide it from the view of the dog, and in the blink of an eye a familiar, white bone appeared in it. It was quite sizable, and he made sure that it was perfectly edible and tasty. It was a bit of his own magical monster food one could say. Although it was only really edible for dogs.

When the bone came into view, the effects were instant. If it was even possible, the dog stood even straighter. Its ears were pointed up in a perfect line, and of course, if one looked closely, Greater Dog’s tail could be seen wagging about behind it.

Sans grinned and watched as the dog’s entire body moved along when he moved his own arm. Once he was entirely certain every fiber of its being was focused on the bone, quickly chucked it in the direction of the doghouse behind them. Sans’ throw wasn’t very good, but it didn’t matter. The dog instantly rushed past both of them with unbelievable speed and retrieved the magical bone.

The instant Greater Dog got a good naw on the thing, its eyes lit up like the stars in the non-visible sky, as if its previous stonewall persona had never even existed. It seemed like that was the best bone it had ever eaten, if Sans was reading that face right. And frankly, he was flattered.

But once that was all neatly taken care of…well…it was a bit awkward.

“A bone.” Flowey remarked with simplicity.

“yeah…” Sans figured that this was the point where Flowey would really just…ask, but to his internal astonishment, the flower simply…sighed, and did not comment on it.

It was kind of bugging him at this point, if he was being entirely honest, but he generally had a principle of not looking a gift horse in the mouth, so he somewhat reluctantly let it be as well.

Instead, Sans lets out a big sigh himself, plopping onto the ground and setting the pot down in front of him.

“by the way, can we take a break maybe? a nap?” It was just before the gauntlet of deadly terror, and therefore—the end, but Sans was frankly...exhausted. So many fights and things happening back to back? It was a nightmare for a lazybones like him. Unfortunately, Flowey turned to him and answered,

“What? Here? You can’t just sit down in the snow and take a nap! You’ll definitely catch a cold then!”

“what even is a cold??” Sans blurted, and instantly recognized his mistake when he saw Flowey’s brows go up in surprise. In his defense, he blamed his tiredness and stupid human coldness and headache and just...general ache from activity. It was truly awful.

Flowey proceeded to give him a blank stare, and Sans stared right back.

Before it could get too awkward though, he just…sighed again, and said nothing. But now it was really bothering Sans, and against his better judgement, he backtracked and shook his head.

“hold on, are you really going to just let all this go without even asking at all?” Sans spoke up, confusion clear on his face. He was certain that Flowey was just dying for answers on the inside; a little respect to privacy was great and all, but even he would have a few questions after all this oddity.

Flowey considered him, clearly a little surprised that Sans decided to bring the matter up himself. It took a few moments before he finally responded.

“I am well aware at this point that you are not normal. That you are not an average human from the surface.” Despite that, his face still turned resolute.

“But that doesn’t matter. I’m still going to protect you, and you are not allowed to give up or die.”

Haha...what a tall order.

Sans...wasn't really sure what to say. His eyes wander as he thinks, and the only thing on his mind is just...

“why though? why are you so insistent about it? uh, about the not dying thing and also the cold thing.” Flowey really was quite the nag when it came to colds, again, whatever those were.

The flower went silent for quite a while, and after some time, Sans was beginning to think that he would not respond at all. However, he eventually spoke again.

“A long time ago…” Flowey began quietly, not meeting his face. 

“A human girl fell down. But she…She was weak. And her clothes were not suited to the cold at all. It must have been warm up there.” Flowey drooped, looking much like a wilted flower shaking in the wind.

“She was young, and she was really really tired. She just wanted to lie down for a while.”

Flowey turned to him, eyes pained, and terrible guilt mired in his reflections of the past.

“She died. Just like…like…” Another distant and horrible memory seemed to pass him by. Even though Sans did not know about Flowey’s exact circumstances, he of course felt not a small amount of sympathy towards him. All of the previous humans were dead, that much was known to Sans, and if Flowey had tried to help the ones in the past…well, clearly something had gone wrong each and every time. Sans wasn’t sure what to say.

“So…I’m not going to fail this time.” Flowey’s expression showed a glint of determination, and it wasn’t just from that foreign human substance either. Experience and loss had shaped this determination, and it was a determination he could respect.

Flowey sharply pressed a vine into his chest. “And you’re not allowed to give up either! Got it?!”

After a moment, Sans finally found it within him to let out a light chuckle. Seems it wasn’t just his weird human determination that was making him not want to give up. He had a peculiar nagging flower to do that as well.

“alright pal, i got it. i’ll try. but uh…” His eyes wandered, considering before he made up his mind.

“no promises.” 

Flowey wilted just a little, but he really didn’t look surprised at all. He seemed to at least be somewhat satisfied by Sans’ admission to try at the very least. Still…

“but ya know, i still don’t know what a cold is.”

Standing up, Sans side-eyed Flowey with an inquiring look. Unsurprisingly the flower groaned at his ignorance of a probably very common human subject, but reliably gave him an answer nonetheless.

“It’s a human sickness! And it’s especially bad against people with a frail, weak constitution.” 

Well, that seemed somewhat targeted, he thought. Sans somewhat nervously scratched the back of his head; he was under no illusions that him being human had brought him any additional physical fortitude. His weak human body and his likewise frail skeleton body were unfortunately very alike in this regard.

Being a human was seriously not what it was hyped up to be.

“oh.” 

Flowey simply rolled his eyes, then looking ahead of them.

“Can we just get a move on? If we get into town, we may be able to find a decent place to rest, okay?” Despite his insistence on no breaks, he was still undeniably concerned about Sans’ complaints.

“okay okay…” He grinned, although it faltered just a tad when he thought about what was ahead.

The Gauntlet of Deadly Terror. Well, that was the name his brother came up with, Sans probably would have made it something a tad shorter, although he appreciated the dramatism. Before, when Papyrus had made the thing, he was pretty sure his brother hadn’t really anticipated the human being so…small, and also enjoying their company so much. Most of all, he was pretty sure his brother simply hadn’t thought that far ahead aside from making something cool. He was pretty sure Undyne had been the influence here.

All that being said, he didn’t know how it’d turn out here. It could end up being even more deadly and terrible. Or, it could be the exact same. Either way, the problem was…

Would this Papyrus make him do it? Somehow, he wasn’t really feeling optimistic here.

Slowly, he began the walk across the way, and soon enough Red and Papyrus clearly came into view. Sans wasn’t afraid of heights or anything, but he was walking at a snail’s pace because he’d really like to prolong this as long as humanly possible.

However, much to his dismay, he eventually appeared in front of his counterpart and alternative brother.

“THE HUMAN ARRIVES…UGH, I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GOT PAST THAT DOG. THAT IS THE LAST TIME I OFFER ANY BONES TO IT!!”

So that’s what happened.

“NO MATTER…THAT ONLY MEANS I GET TO CAPTURE AND DESTROY YOU MYSELF! WITH MY OWN CREATION!”

With no small amount of flair, Papyrus swept his hand about, revealing the remote held inside it. Pressing the button, he exclaimed,

“BEHOLD!! THE GAUNTLET OF DEADLY TERROR!” 

Down came the various mechanisms, each more deadly than the last. However, it appeared to be entirely identical to his memories of it. Well, except for the dog. That fluffy white dog was now wearing a red, spiked collar. Everything else about it was entirely the same though, almost as if it didn’t belong here and was simply trying to fit in.

Well, it was at least one small relief that it was something he was familiar with, however…That meant the difference probably came somewhere else.

Papyrus grinned manically, clearly excited to use his most deadly and involved obstacle yet, even though one couldn’t exactly call it a puzzle.

“WHEN I PRESS THIS BUTTON, IT WILL ACTIVATE! STEP THROUGH...IF YOU DARE! IF YOU ARE NOT CAREFUL YOU WILL BE SHRED TO PIECES, AND THEN I SHALL SURELY BECOME CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD!”

So that was his aspiration, huh? Not that it was a particular important thing to think about now, because it was looking like Papyrus really wanted him to go through it...tragically.

“don’t worry pal, we’ll catch your corpse before it falls.” Red assured him with a grin. Sans merely gave him his own blank grin back, but somehow he was pretty sure one could sense he wasn’t entirely thrilled here.

“OF COURSE! WE MUST RETRIEVE THE SOUL AFTER ALL! NOW—”

With a large amount of flair, Papyrus activated the machine. Sans had only seen it on while Papyrus had been testing it many moons ago, but he knew it was indeed the same. His brother had talked about having Undyne try it out, and while that probably would have been great for her…for Sans? Not so much.

That is, of course, not to say Sans wasn’t confident in his dodging abilities and his balance, he was. But without using any obvious magic? This…this was too much. There was absolutely no way he could make it through.

And yet…Sans could see the theoretical correct path through, it was clear in his head. He could do it, even though it sounded ridiculous.

He took a long breath in, and sighed.

“...hey flowey. if i fall, you’ll catch me, right?”

Flowey snapped his head around to look at him, shock and incredulity clear on his face.

“What?! You don’t plan on actually going through that thing, do you?” 

Sans arched a brow at him, also trying to look more confident than he really was. “well, what other options are there? uh, magic is a no-go for me.”

Flowey floundered and sputtered about, trying to think of any possible reason he could give to make Sans not go through this thing. But in the end, he just wilted and drooped, defeated.

“...I’ll catch you.”

Sans chuckled at his attitude, setting Flowey down as he reassured him.

“hey, it ain’t that big a deal. even if i get bisected in half. although that would uh, be pretty unpleasant. save points, remember?”

“But what about your 0-deaths run…” The droopy plant mumbled, still not entirely on-board, but unable to do anything about it.

Sans just shrugged flippantly as he took off his jacket. He didn’t really want to risk it getting torched or sliced after all.

“then oh well i guess. but hey, i don’t plan on dyin’ ya know.”

Before he could say anything else, he had a thought.

“hey! if i make it through, can i go back to get my stuff?” He called out to the skeletons ahead.

Papyrus looked a little startled, but crossed his arms in agreement.

“FINE…I SUPPOSE THAT IS FAIR.”

Sans nodded in understanding, and threw his jacket away. Behind him, he heard the muffled shriek of a surprised flower.

“whoops, take care of that for me, k?”

He proceeded to take off both his slippers and his socks as well, given they probably wouldn’t do him any good here. Being barefoot on the cold, painted stone without even a jacket was unbearably chilly, especially to his tiny body with little extra fat to speak of. Being modeled after a skeleton was really doing him no favors here. All that being said, he shouldn’t need to bear it for long.

The gauntlet of deadly terror looked absolutely, well, deadly, but there was a method to the madness. With a deep breath and a grin on his face that was much more confident than he really felt, he stepped forward.

He ducked and stepped around the ball and chain that swung by, ran past the spew of flames, and when he was met with the sharp and deadly spears, he took a slightly nervous step backwards before realizing it was a mistake. Instead, he ran past the first blade and tilted his head and ducked to avoid being cut by the second. He was given little time to reflect on whether or not any of his hair had been sliced off because he quickly had to fall to his knees to avoid getting blasted off the bridge by a cannonball. He then wasted no time picking himself back up again and finally to top it all off, jumped as high as he could to grab the fluffy chonk of a dog, using a tiny bit of magic to ensure the rope snapped clean off.

It was done, he had done it.

It was utterly silent, except for of course his labored breathing and the happy and unbothered panting of the dog in his arms. Between breaths that thoroughly ruined any apathy he could muster, he said,

“...uh…t-ta-dah?”

Chapter Text

“WHAT.”  Papyrus looked utterly flabbergasted and simply couldn’t believe his eyes. Red was actually somewhat similar, although much more reserved.

“huh… didn’t expect that…” Sans could also almost visualize Flowey’s shocked expression from over here. 

However, no one was more surprised about Sans' feat than Sans himself. Sure, he had had some semblance of confidence—but that was different, the before and after made all the difference here.

He just did that. 

He did…Sans never would have done that. The adrenaline was making his brain think a mile a minute, and all he could think about was that he never could have done that before. He’s changed, he’s not the same.

And it scared him.

All that being said…now that everything was winding down, he was quickly beginning to feel the chill permeate his entire body, and he did not like it one bit. He honestly wanted to snuggle the fluffy dog in his arms to try and obtain its warmth, but ultimately he had to set the dog down, who still seemed entirely unperturbed and simply gave a friendly little bark in response.

While Papyrus was still in a state of shock, Sans raised a trembling hand a small bit, grin a little shaky.

“um, c-can i go get my stuff now?”

“WHA-? U-URGH…YES. I AM A SKELETON OF MY WORD!”

Papyrus reluctantly shut down the machine and the gadgets of terror soon came to a halt. Sans half lethargically and half hurriedly made his way back to Flowey.

He immediately got a face full of blue fabric.

“thanks.” he remarked, muffled. Although his voice was still trembling from the cold.

“Don’t just stand there, put it on!!” 

Before he could even try though, it seemed Flowey thought he was simply taking way too long, and he ended up doing it himself with his very long and flexible vines. Those things seriously were handy.

Sans let the worried flower mother him all he liked, and focused on trying to get his socks on. Well, he was ultimately unsuccessful because he nearly fell over due to his shaky legs and arms, and Flowey ended up doing that too…A little embarrassing, but he was too exhausted to care, and the flower was much faster at it anyways. Less work for him, the better, he often thought.

Flowey just liked to fuss over things in general and Sans was getting used to it by now, especially given the copious amount of experience he had with his brother, as well as his memories of Toriel from behind the door and in person.

Once he had slipped on his slippers and zipped his jacket right up, he wrapped his arms around his body in an attempt to warm himself. It was only partially successful.

“ugh… now i really need a break.” He could seriously feel a headache coming on. Flowey looked very worried and concerned, even a little panicked.

“I can’t believe you went without a jacket or shoes!” He chastised him, although looking very frustrated with himself at that moment. He was probably mad he couldn’t do anything more.

“didn’t want my jacket to get ruined…and the slippers would make it difficult…” He mumbled, but it felt like the flower didn’t even hear him. Or rather, he thought it less important than his bodily health.

“Let’s just get a move on, and be careful on the bridge!” He fussed, looking at his wobbly legs with no small amount of skepticism and worry. Sans was tired, and cold, and ached all over; he didn’t pay much mind to Flowey’s words.

“h-heh… guess i’m still as weak as ever, i haven’t actually changed much…” he murmured blearily, wanting to close his eyes; It eased that fear he had felt before, but it didn’t entirely go away.

He heard a sigh below him, Flowey seemed to shake his head.

“Can you pick me up, please?”

Right, he had to do that. 

Sans leaned down and carefully took hold of Flowey’s pot, releasing a tired and winding breath when he righted himself again. The pot wasn’t really all that heavy, but he could still feel it weighing him down now.

Together they crossed the bridge; Flowey seemed deeply concerned that Sans would stumble and fall, and therefore was tensely poised to do what he could to catch him, but Sans wasn’t worried about it in the slightest. He had crossed this area half asleep plenty of times with his brother when he had been dragged out of the house far too early (according to him).

At the end, Red and Papyrus were waiting, and he almost could have sworn they were looking at him in concern. As for Papyrus though, it was quickly wiped off his face when Sans got close, and was replaced with reluctant and frustrated acknowledgement, and Sans thought he was even a little impressed.

“I MUST ADMIT HUMAN, I MAY HAVE UNDERESTIMATED YOUR ABILITIES. JUST SLIGHTLY.” Papyrus’ face twisted in what Sans read as his version of a pout.

“that makes two of us…” Sans muttered under his breath, voice far too quiet for anyone—except perhaps Flowey—to hear.

Papyrus’ face then shifted into something more resolute, staring him down with an intimidating stare.

“HOWEVER, I WILL NOT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE! YOU WILL NOT BE LEAVING SNOWDIN WITHOUT GOING THROUGH ME FIRST.”

As his alternate brother waxed at length about various intimidating things, Sans found himself beginning to doze off now that he was just standing still here. He was no stranger to falling asleep while standing up after all, and therefore the words they were all saying gradually tumbled out of reach as time went on.

Of course, that was until his sweet dreams were rudely interrupted by a pointy phalange pressing into his squishy cheek. He flinched while backing away slightly and blearily blinked his eyes open. When he took a look around he noticed that all eyes were on him: they were all a mix of exasperated, confused, and amused. 

“uh, whoops. what were we talkin’ about again?”

Red smirked and backed away from him as his brother sighed with grief.

“UGH, THE HUMAN IS EVEN WORSE THAN YOU…IN SOME WAYS.” Papyrus directed towards his counterpart, crossing his arms and glaring his way. Red simply shrugged it off.

“HUMAN, AS MUCH AS I WOULD LIKE THIS TO BE RESOLVED POST-HASTE, I AM A SKELETON WITH STANDARDS, AND I WOULD RATHER NOT LIKE AN OPPONENT WHO FALLS ASLEEP WHILE I AM TALKING TO THEM, NO MATTER HOW MELODIOUS AND SOOTHING MY VOICE IS!” Papyrus shifted his eyes sharply at Red, who stood up a little straighter. 

“SANS WILL TAKE YOU TO MY DWELLING TO REST, WHILE I TAKE CARE OF VARIOUS IMPORTANT BUSINESS.”

Red quietly clicked his tongue, (and now that Sans was thinking about it, how did he do that? How had he done that?) appearing none too pleased about this arrangement.

“why do we gotta bother with all that—it’s all gonna end up the same anyways.” The skeleton muttered, a touch of bitterness and darkness infecting his voice. Papyrus merely gave him a cold glare.

“I DO NOT RECALL IT BEING ANY OF YOUR CONCERN.” 

Red seemed only slightly miffed about that: given he was a monster, of course the fallen human was part of his concern. However, Sans knew that Red likely didn’t actually care about the human business all that much. To him, It more so seemed like he was exasperated with their frivolous song and dance when it was all going to end up the same, whether from him getting killed, or a reset. From Red’s perspective, it should have been a simple matter to just capture him and be done with it. Maybe he was afraid Papyrus would end up suffering if he lost his nerve.

Well, at that point it was only speculation—even if very insightful speculation, given he probably understood Red’s potential thought process better than anyone else. They still had their differences however, so Sans would have to be careful to not make too many assumptions.

Red just rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything further. He didn’t follow Papyrus after he left, so Sans thought it was safe to assume that Red would probably do as he was told.

Sans repressed a startled jump when a boney hand set itself on his shoulder, although his sluggishness probably contributed to his non-reaction.

“heh. ya’ look just about ready to keel over. well, you’d technically be doin’ us a favor if ya’ did. but the boss wouldn’t like that much.” Red slightly rolled his eyes when he mentioned ‘the boss’, but Sans wasn’t sure if it was because of the title or just his exasperation with Papyrus’ methods.

“goin’ through the town will be a bit of a pain in the ass, so why don’t we take a shortcut?”

Sans heard Flowey huff, but the flower said nothing. 

He grinned, tiredness tugging at the corners; He’d like to be able to explore Snowdin, but frankly the thing in the forefront of his mind was definitely sleep. He could always take a look later, and determination or no, there was really nothing else he’d rather be doing right now. Therefore, he shrugged slightly, wiping any recognition he could display about the ability off his face.

“sure, why not.”

Red walked forward in a fairly random direction, pulling him along with the hand still gripping his shoulder. It was an interesting thing, the way he subtly misdirected his attention enough to make the sudden transition of location feel at least somewhat natural. Of course, it was much more effective when he had some sort of door or alleyway to use, but it was a technique that Sans himself had of course used on occasion.

Not that the change in location was any less odd, and there was obviously no way Red could pull one over Sans.

“hm…fast shortcut.” He commented with a yawn as he took in what used to be his house.

It was similar in a lot of ways, but there were plenty of differences. It was painted black with red accents, and he could tell from the slightly sloppy job that it hadn’t always been that way. And that wasn’t even mentioning the—…decorative?—spikes that poked out every which way in a seemingly random manner. That, combined with the familiar cheerful string of holiday lights adorning and roof and balcony made for an interesting contrast.

The feeling in his chest was just a little too painful with longing for him to consider it much more, but he liked it. It was a nice house.

Red’s voice cut through his reminiscing, and he could hear the jangle of keys that he was certain Red had not carried with him before.

“yep, pretty cool right? the boss says it promotes ‘bad habits’ or whatever.” He said, referring to the shortcut. Sans didn’t have to see the mirth on Red’s face to hear it in his voice.

“nah, that’s crazy talk. i’d take a shortcut over the long way ‘round anyday.” Sans replied, siding with him immediately. He heard Flowey snort, his eyes leering at his skeleton counterpart, but addressing them both.

“You two are just lazy.” He accused, and Sans couldn’t do a thing except shrug helplessly. It was true, after all.

Red peered at Flowey with an interesting face for a moment before replying normally.

“i’ll take bein’ lazy over walkin’ through the town.” 

Flowey frowned at that, and it appeared like he got the hidden meaning behind what Red was saying.

Sans didn’t, not exactly anyways. He realized that Snowdin probably wasn’t as cozy as he was used to, but perhaps there was something more to it. But, before he was able to ask, the skeleton next to him had already found time to unlock the door and roughly push him inside, which earned him a glare from the flower in the pot.

“Hey!” Flowey snapped immediately. But Red just rolled his eye.

“ain’t like i was pushin’ you, weed.”

Flowey glowered at him, but was apparently unwilling to make a scene out of it, so he just resorted to murmuring under his breath. “Now that’s a smiley trashbag…”

Red walked after Sans, closing the door behind him and when he did, Sans could immediately feel the relative warmth of the house wash over him. Although frankly, it wasn’t all that warm here either, he recognized. He and Papyrus had never paid too much mind to heating the house, and although blankets and such were nice, they weren’t really needed for the cold at least.

However, it was still miles better than being outside in the snow, so Sans let out a sigh appreciatively. Somehow, the warmth was making him even more sleepy than he was before: he walked forward and plopped himself down on the couch. It was somehow even more lumpy than their old couch, but it was still undeniably comfortable in its own way.

When he was tired like this, it was easy to look over the differences around him and only see the similarities, and when he thought about himself sitting on his couch in his house…well, he couldn’t help but let that pleasant feeling nod himself to sleep.

Consciousness came to him slowly, and a dull ache immediately made itself known in the back of his mind. His head was resting on something lumpy but soft, but there was still a haze shifting around in his brain and he wasn’t entirely sure where or when he was. Wisps of a dream slipped through the cracks and quickly left him, leaving him only vague imprints of golden flowers and the sun, all laced with fear. He didn't really remember having this many dreams before.

From right next to him, a voice spoke up urgently in a relieved tone, although still soft enough to not agitate him.

“You’re awake! Finally…”

When he blearily blinked open his eyes to see who it was, it was…well, Flowey—settled inside a pot that sat on the couch, and was surrounded by and held loosely by Sans' own arms, which were partially covered by a blanket that he did not recall having. That was both alarming and entirely expected all at the same time. Flowey…right this—was…not his Underground. And this…

He looked around: the walls were red, the interior was lived in but bare, familiar as well as distant all at once, and the TV had a crack in it that he did not remember. This was not his house.

He had already known that, but the memory washing back so suddenly made it unbearably painful, and he closed his eyes.

“uh… yeah. how long was i out?” Sans asked slowly, startled at its hoarseness. There was a scratchy feeling in his throat, and his mouth felt dry. Somehow, he found the right word for this feeling in the back of his soul. He was thirsty.

Flowey frowned, although what specifically at Sans wasn’t entirely sure. His hoarse voice was probably one of them.

“For the rest of the previous day and the following night—I can’t believe you just fell asleep in a stranger’s house so easily!” Flowey informed and chastised him at the same time, but there wasn’t much anger behind it, mostly just concern.

Sans considered himself the king of sleeping wherever he wasn’t supposed to, but generally he would not do so in a total stranger’s house in a place that seemed dangerous. But, no matter what: it was hard for him to think of his own house as dangerous, or even the alternate versions of himself and his brother, no matter how different they were. 

“heheh…whoops. what about you? did ya’ sleep?”

Flowey just gave him a mildly incredulous look. “Of course not. I’m a flower, I don’t sleep.”

Sans blinked at him as he took that in. “so you just sat here for hours and hours? oh, that’s…”

Flowey's leaves moved about frantically at that as he suddenly sputtered. “I-I didn’t just stare at you the whole time, okay!? I was just keeping watch, because someone decided to just fall asleep right in front of the most shady guy around!”

“...i was gonna say boring, but thanks, i ‘preciate it.” He could tell Flowey was telling the truth, he was just flustered. Sans shrugged off the blanket over him as he sat up. It was nothing special, but it was black and fairly warm, all things considering.

“did red get this?”

 Flowey deflated a little as he responded, both relieved and embarrassed that Sans hadn't thought he was being weird.

“Yes…I nagged at him to… Hmph-” The flower scrunched up his nose in disgust. “You’d think that with all his magazines on humans he’d know that they need to be warm when they sleep.”

Sans’ mood was a bit better now just by talking a little, but he was still quite thirsty. And—he realized just now: quite hungry. Hunger was a seriously unpleasant feeling as a human, and only thirst was second to it; he could really go for some Grillby’s right now, honestly...But going into town by himself was a little...

As if he could sense Sans’ thoughts, he then felt a twist of magic in the space close by, and immediately Red appeared in the space after it—a shortcut.

The skeleton glanced over at him, and then smirked while strutting over.

“jeez, look who’s awake.” Red leaned over him slightly, earning him a glare from Flowey.

“you’re sure lucky you got that creepy weed with you, else something unpleasant might have happened to sleeping beauty here.”

It was an unsettling joke, but little else. Sans could easily tell that he didn’t particularly mean it. Although, he could sense a little incredulity. “what kinda idiot just falls asleep in a stranger’s house, anyways? ‘specially the stranger who was kinda tryin’ t'kill ya not too long ago.”

At that, Flowey fixed Sans himself with a side-eyed stare. Indeed; meet said idiot.

Sans grinned, entirely nonplussed.

“guess your hospitality is just that good.” He responded, crossing his arms.

Their conversation was then interrupted when a large, round cat jumped up from behind the couch and onto his shoulder, knocking him forward. Red didn’t seem particularly surprised by the appearance, but given Sans had never actually met a cat before (technically), it definitely was a shock.

“uh what the heck.”

The cat merely looked at him with a head-empty expression and meowed.

Thankfully, through rolling eyes his counterpart responded for it.

“it’s papyrus’ cat. it's named…doomfanger. it kinda just showed up one day, kinda like that dog.” He informed him, sounding just a tad exasperated.

“I’ve seen it around before. I feel like I saw it near that red door quite a lot.” Flowey added. Given the flower didn’t really seem to mind the cat much, it would seem it was entirely harmless. Sans reached out and pet it; it was incredibly satisfying. Still, what a mystery…there was both a cat, and a dog here? That was odd, he was about to ask Red about it when they were interrupted yet again by the door slamming itself open.

It was—of course—Papyrus.

“AH! HUMAN, YOU ARE FINALLY AWAKE! I CAN’T BELIEVE HOW LAZY HUMANS ARE…”

Sans still didn’t think sleeping like a regular person was really a sign of laziness, but who was he to say? He grinned at his alternate brother.

“oh yeah, humans are super lazy.” He agreed, but by the end it had devolved into a dry cough. A dry throat really made it hard to speak, who knew?

Papyrus forgoed bemoaning human laziness and instead frowned. Sans wasn’t entirely sure why he was concerned exactly though; this Papyrus seemed fairly set on capturing him —or rather, killing him—so he wasn’t sure why it mattered. However…

“HMM…IT APPEARS YOU ARE NOT YET WELL ENOUGH TO HAVE A FAIR CONFRONTATION!” 

Sans cleared his throat a little before answering, raising his brow a bit in slight confusion. “uh, no offense. i appreciate the fairness and hospitality, but why bother? aren’t ya’ tryin’ to kill me?”

Papyrus seemed momentarily taken aback, but it was swiftly rectified with a resolute and prideful expression.

“I COULD NOT CALL MYSELF A WORTHY MEMBER OF THE ROYAL GUARD AND PROTECTOR OF MONSTERKIND IF I USED UNFAIR TACTICS AGAINST THE ENEMY.” He stated, then he faltered just a little.

“TH…THOSE PREVIOUS PUZZLES WERE MERELY TESTS TO SEE IF YOU WERE A REAL, CAPABLE HUMAN…OF COURSE.” 

ah. so he’s admitting that those puzzles were totally unfair.

It was incredibly flimsy arguing, but Sans could hardly be mad.

Papyrus then turned to Red, glaring at him with the look that indicated that he better do what he was told. “SANS, PLEASE FEED AND WATER THE HUMAN BEFORE BRINGING THEM TO THE PATH TO WATERFALL—IT WOULD BE EMBARRASSING FOR SOMEONE SUCH AS I TO FIGHT SUCH A WEAKENED OPPONENT, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ARE ALREADY WEAK TO BEGIN WITH!”

Red narrowed his eyes and really looked like he wanted to complain, but Papyrus continued before he was able. “AND DO NOT LET THEM OUT OF YOUR SIGHT, OR ALLOW ANY OTHER MONSTERS TO GET INVOLVED. AM I CLEAR?”

His counterpart couldn’t look any less pleased, and Sans thought it was somewhat interesting to witness. Sans had rarely let his true feelings show on his face, much less his negative ones. It seemed Red didn’t feel as inclined to when it came to his brother.

“babysittin’ huh…fine. got it.” Unwilling to argue, Red eventually just sighed and shrugged, managing a toothy grin of his own.

“can’t go against orders from the boss, right?” 

Papyrus puffed up his chest and laughed his maniacal laugh, but it was delighted, and lighter than usual. 

It would seem even Red was unable to say much against his brother’s sincere requests and desires. That was, to be able to fight the human under honorable circumstances, rather than relying on dishonest trickery.

…Sans got the feeling that out of everyone in this world, Papyrus was surely still the kindest.

Papyrus turned to him and pointed a severe finger in his face.

“AND DON’T YOU RUN AND GET YOURSELF KILLED EITHER; THAT HONOR BELONGS TO ME! OF COURSE…”

He said as much confidently enough, but Sans could sense he felt a little uncertainty about the matter. He just gave the skeleton a half-hearted salute, not looking particularly intimidated at all.

“aye aye boss.”

And just like that, Papyrus disappeared out the door again and slammed it, just as quickly as he had come. The door looked like the hinges were struggling to hang on, but Sans wasn’t sure if that was only the fault of Papyrus, considering said edgy brother was still closely associated with Undyne.

“...well, am i gonna get fed and watered or what?” He turned towards the silent skeleton next to him with a cheeky grin. He was simply met by a tired and annoyed sigh from his apparent babysitter for the time being, who immediately after grabbed his arm and pulled Sans to his feet unceremoniously. Doomfanger also jumped down at the same time, and Sans had to make sure to grab Flowey.

“jeez, we gonna take another ‘shortcut’ or somethin’?” He asked, half expecting to get pulled through one at the next blink. But Red shook his head and indicated the kitchen with a thumb.

“if ya want water, you should get it from the sink. grillbz won’t touch the stuff.”

He couldn’t help the wide smile that appeared on his face at that: he had really wanted to go to Grillby’s. Despite his reservations about seeing distorted versions of many people who he was so familiar with and had considered his friends… Even so, there was nothing better than a burger from Grillby’s, and with his new squishy human appendage—a fully physical tongue— it would surely make it an even more interesting experience.

But of course, he was actually quite thirsty for a change, and he’d prefer to not have to order alcohol. He was entirely unsurprised however when he walked into the kitchen that the sink looked like a straight up safety hazard. It was familiarly tall, but it seemed like some sort of extreme climbing exercise given all the spikes protruding from it in every imaginable direction. Undyne would have loved it, but…

“what? not up to the challenge?” He gestured at the sink, a fortress of spikes and pain.

“um, no thanks. i’m not into being impaled” He responded plainly, glancing upwards towards the unviewable top of the sink. Red of course probably didn’t have a problem getting water—a little creative magic could go a long way after all—but Sans obviously didn’t have that option available to him at the moment. He would find it a bit more funny had he not actually been extremely thirsty.

Then, Flowey gestured to him to set his pot down on the nearby counter. After being set down, with the ease of someone who knew exactly what to do, the flower’s flexible vines instantly located a glass from one of the cupboards, reached over the hill of death and destruction, and turned on the facet to fill up a glass of water. He looked a little smug as he handed Sans the glass, directed mostly towards the skeleton behind him. The glass was extremely full, so much so that the water was just barely peeking over the brim.

“wow, what a dirty cheater. not very honorable ya’ know.” Red tutted, raising a boney brow at the flower on the counter. 

Flowey bristled. “You’re calling me a cheater?” He hissed, incredulous with the idea. Sans personally thought they were all kinda cheaters in this room though, if he was being honest.

“this glass is…really full.” he pointed out, interrupting them mostly to stop any potential escalations. Flowey immediately turned his attention back to Sans despite the miffed look that remained on it for a second or two. He looked oddly thoughtful for a moment.

“Well…that’s the most efficient way to do it.” The flower had a strange look on his face, but Sans couldn’t help but grin at that explanation. It was true, after all.

“heheh. you’re right, it is super efficient, huh?” Gratefully, Sans drank from the extremely full glass of water, and before he knew it, the cup was completely empty. His headache receded even more than before, and he let out a sigh of relief; water really was important to humans, huh? He’d have to remember that, or well…Flowey could remember that, at least.

“...don’t flowers need water too?” He commented after a moment. Flowey blinked with a gobsmacked look on his face, and just hunched in on himself, looking mildly embarrassed.

“I’m fine right now…”

Well, they could always use some emergency snow or the water in waterfall, so Sans decided to leave the matter be.

Suddenly, there was a banging sound coming from within the cupboard of the sink.

“uh, what the hell is that?” Red questioned, looking rather perturbed, Flowey did too. Sans glanced at the cupboard; he didn’t really find the occurrence to be all that strange. That little white dog had always been rummaging around in there, and unlike Papyrus, Sans didn’t particularly care. Rather, he found it kind of hilarious. It was truly fitting that a dog would end up raiding a house of skeletons. As long as the dog didn’t try and take a bite out of him (it had nommed on his brother before, but never on him), he didn’t mind if it wanted to steal some bones.

While the other two in the room were frozen in surprise, Sans just walked forward and somehow found the handle to the cupboard amidst the spikes; it would seem that the doors were still functional…again, somehow. Predictably, when he swung the door open, there was a little white dog in a spikey red collar sitting inside, munching on a bone.

The instant it was found, the dog disappeared in a blur, nearly knocking Sans over. It barked circles around the cat, who just stood there as if it didn’t even register it, and then zoomed out the door before anyone could think to do a thing.

...

The palpable silence was broken by a groan; Red had a hand over his face as he complained. “ugh, the boss is gonna be pissed about this…i’m blaming this on you two.”

Flowey protested incredulously, arguing with his counterpart while Sans just chuckled to himself while mostly tuning them out.

He turned to Red, interrupting them. “well. that certainly happened. now, are we goin' out somewhere?”

The skeleton blinked, as if he had completely forgotten about the matter, which Sans did not really appreciate given his stomach was tying itself in knots in hunger. It was extremely uncomfortable. Had he not been a skeleton before this, and instead a more squishy monster, he may have had an easier time dealing with all this change. But alas, he was—or had been—a skeleton through and through.

He managed to resist startling when Red was suddenly right behind him, although Flowey did twitch a little, accentuated by a small tsk of annoyance. Sans was plenty used to sneaking up on others, but he was not used to being snuck up on. He only was able to resist reacting because of the slight, recognizable twist of magic that occurred when one took a shortcut.

His counterpart placed a hand on his shoulder, pushing him into the living room and towards the door.

“alright, fine. let’s go get something to eat.”

Sans grinned, both excited to eat at Grillby’s and anxious about going into town. Regardless, it was surely going to be quite the experience.

Chapter Text

When Red opened the front door to the house, Sans was unsurprised when it led them to a bar instead of the snow. From here, he could tell that the room had a somewhat eerie green glow, giving the bar a rather disconcerting feeling. Not to mention, when he walked through there was a suffocating air about. Even though green was not a color he typically associated with warmth, he could instantly tell that it was still as warm as ever here, and it was comforting in a way. The color may not be the same, nor was the atmosphere, but the heat emanating from the one behind the bar was as consistent and pleasant as ever, especially as a human.

Sans was not so pleased by the temperature to not notice the uncomfortable feeling that went throughout the bar when his presence was made known, however. It added on to its already incredibly stuffy atmosphere. Every monster regarded his unfamiliar face with distance, and suspicion. It was a stark contrast to the monsters he was familiar with; always open and friendly with each other, even with strangers.

Although there were some exceptions in the dog pack, who had, of course, met him before. Greater dog looked a little nervous, like Red might punish him on his brother’s behalf for letting the human get by (extremely unlikely); Lesser dog wagged its tail when he was spotted, undoubtedly recalling his pets; Doggo just squinted, and the dog couple regarded him with curiosity more than anything.

Nonetheless, Red paid it all little mind, and simply kept his easy if sharp grin while roughly greeting all the usual regulars.

“Gee Sansy, where’d you find such a cute little thing?” Drunk bunny was as wasted as ever (actually, even more so than usual), and Sans simply let her comment wash over him indifferently. Although Flowey looked more than a little peeved. Before he could say anything however, Red simply waved his hand flippantly and pulled at Sans’ shoulder to slide along past her.

“in the garbage dump.” Was his swift, remorseless reply, turning the flower’s indignance onto him immediately.

“Why you-!” Sans quickly put a hand over Flowey’s mouth, and finally that flowery glare made its way onto him. However, from his expression, it seemed that he had accepted Sans’ silent request, even if he looked none too happy about it.

When they finally reached the stools Sans nearly went for his usual spot before he remembered that it wasn’t his usual spot. It was Red’s. Somehow that made him feel more empty than anything else. How ridiculous.

He distracted himself from this feeling by doing what he did best.

They sat down.

But then suddenly, in a nearly silent bar, a sound rang out; it was long and winding. 

It was a fart noise.

And it was not from his seat.

With impeccable comedic timing, right as the whoopie cushion puttered out its final struggling breaths, the skeleton next to him subsequently burst out in howling laughter; like it was the funniest thing he’d heard in years. Flowey, meanwhile, looked like a hilarious cross between gobsmacked and entirely unsurprised.

“what the hell was that…?” His counterpart snickered with bemusement, sounding a little breathless, and unable or unwilling to contain most of his laughter.

Sans unfortunately had not kept his handheld whoopie cushion in his inventory, but he had always kept at least one regular cushion stored away for emergency use. It was one of the few items that he had kept inside his inventory, which—much like his gold—was still miraculously intact. He briefly wondered if someone’s inventory was directly connected to one’s soul, but he quickly shoved the consideration aside to give his response to the cackling skeleton.

“huh? i guess some weirdos put whoopie cushions on seats here.” He hummed innocently, blinking as if it didn’t concern him at all.

“right.” red snorted sarcastically, pulling the whoopie cushion out and tossing it his way, which he caught. “you can have this back, weirdo.” 

Sans merely grinned vaguely, unwilling to give any ground. 

“guess i’ll keep it then.” He shrugged, putting it away even though Flowey looked at it like one would at garbage: Sans was certain he would rather it be thrown in the trash instead.

Fairly quickly, a green colored Grillby in some alternate clothes approached them from behind the counter. That was what gave the room that eerie filter, reflecting off of the backs and side eyed glances of monsters and darkening the shadows at every turn. Still, Grillby was as quiet as ever, if even more stand-offish than usual.

“i’ll take the usual, grillbz, and somethin’ for him, too.” Red flippantly jabbed a thumb his way, lazily resting his arms on the counter with his head in his hand. Even so, his crimson eye kept a deceptively close watch on everything, and the dim light made its glow even more prominent when Grillby left out the back door, leaving the room dark.

“don’t even get to choose, huh?” He quipped, raising a brow towards the skeleton who dragged his eye to look at him.

“everything grillby makes is good, so it doesn’t make a difference.” Flowey rolled his eyes at that, although Sans personally agreed with the statement.

“What if he had—I don’t know, allergies?” The flower pointed out, reasonably, Sans assumed.

“that a human thing?” his counterpart jokingly inquired, raising a boney brow. Allergies weren’t exactly unheard of with monsters, but he was pretty sure the human ones were a little different then say…not mixing with water as a fire monster, and not being able to eat chocolate because you were a dog monster. Somehow, he knew this on some subconscious level, even without the reassurance that Flowey probably knew what he was talking about.

“actually, do you?” Red asked a little more seriously, and Sans felt a similarly interested gaze come from the pot on his lap.

“uh…not that i know of?” He answered, trying to not sound as unsure as he did. He genuinely had no clue. It was entirely possible this body was allergic to something, but unless humans had tests for that sort of thing aside from just…ingesting something and seeing if it killed you, he was unlikely to find out what it was.

“oh well then.” Red shrugged. Their subsequent silence was broken by the red bird sitting a couple seats away from them.

“Never seen someone like you before, ya from’ the city?” They asked, eyeing Sans with a hefty portion of both suspicion and curiosity. Most monsters didn’t really know what humans looked like: had they been in a more FIGHT based scenario, they would most likely be able to easily tell, but otherwise monsters were largely uninformed.

That being said, Sans still got the feeling that everyone here had it on their mind; he could feel the stares on his back. Said stares had significantly reduced their intensity at his little childish prank, but they had certainly not gone away.

Deftly ignoring all the suspicion weighing on him, Sans just casually shrugged. “heh, the city’s got weirdos like you wouldn’t believe.” he replied, not confirming or denying anything directly. The bird snorted just slightly.

“ain’t that the truth…” They muttered agreeably. Fortunately, Grillby’s speedy service spared him the need to explain any further. A moderately sized basket of fries was placed in front of him, and a burger was set down for Red. Sans kind of thought the portions were just a tad smaller than he was used to, which gave him the impression that this Grillby was just a tad more cheap than his. However, it’s not like he had a particularly large appetite anyways, even as a human, so he merely dismissed it with a small dose of amusement.

Lastly, Grillby set down a bottle. Which was normal enough, but was not normal was the color of said bottle. It was yellow. It was mustard, not ketchup.

Now, Sans didn’t dislike mustard or anything like that, but he still couldn’t help but turn up his nose at the sight of that dastardly thing taking the place of his condiment of choice. Not to mention the way his eyebrows arched up when he watched Red chug down the yellow condiment in a very reminiscent fashion, although unlike Sans, he didn’t have the decency to ask if he was going to use any (he wasn’t).

Flowey made a disgusted noise, even though he didn’t seem especially surprised.

“Ugh, you’re so gross!” He complained.

Red only smirked at them, not put out in the slightest at the flower’s repulsion. “sorry, did you want some?” he apologized and asked, not sounding very sorry at all despite the mustard being entirely emptied. Sans made some sort of face that was a cross between amusement and skepticism.

“uh, no. i’m good i think.” He said evenly, even though his expression probably clearly showed what he thought about Red’s tastes. Entirely hypocritical of him, of course, but still.

“actually, grillbz- grillby—could i get some ketchup?” He asked the bartender, who paused before granting his request. Before he set the bottle down, however, Grillby leaned forward just slightly and asserted in his wispy, crackling voice, “You’re paying extra for this….”

In response, Sans merely cracked a small grin and shrugged; he would, of course, be a responsible customer and pay (even though his Grillby let him get away with the insistence that “you don’t gotta pay for condiments”).

“course’.” He hummed, lethargically reaching over the counter to grasp his ketchup, masking the internal excitement he felt at trying it. After all, this would be his first experience having the tomato-based delight with fully human faculties. He nearly intended to drink straight from the bottle much like how his skeleton counterpart had, but he decided to refrain this time. It wouldn’t do to accidentally overpower his taste buds and twist the experience of really tasting ketchup for the first time, after all. Instead, he just drizzled a moderate amount of it over his equally delicious looking fries, before then pulling off his gloves. Despite the hunger gnawing at him, he wanted to properly savor the experience…

Sans wasn’t paying Red much mind, but right as he was scraping up the determination to give his food a try, he sensed that the skeleton was about to say something. That was of course before Sans stopped him in his tracks with a hand positioned right in front of his face. He glanced over.

“let’s not start with whatever you want to tell me until after i get to eat, k?”

Red didn’t know how to react to that, and looked somewhat miffed. Still, in the end he settled back down and let Sans turn his attention back to his food without fuss.

After what had felt like an eternity, Sans FINALLY got to try his favorite food of choice for…well, the first time. Technically. It was a bit of an interesting paradox.

He picked up a crispy, golden fry with a reasonable amount of ketchup stuck to it, not giving much regard to any mess that got on his fingers (although actually, maybe he should, because while Sans cared very little about making a mess the feeling of food on his human digits was kind of unpleasant) and with the large amount dramaticism that he felt was appropriate for such a momentous occasion, he finally took a bite.

Sans paused, mind vaguely blank as he processed and tried to formulate his thoughts on the flavor, a concept that had been largely out of reach for him until very very recently.

It was…kind of average.

Of course, that was not to say it wasn’t good. It was. It was delicious, even. It just didn’t quite match up to his expectations. Although he loved nearly everything about it, somehow, there was just something he felt was missing; something that would truly tip it over the edge into being the best thing ever. Unfortunately, he didn’t think he was currently equipped to tackle the question of what exactly that missing magic was.

“Um, are you okay?” Flowey’s voice questioned below him, voice coloured with both concern and incredulity. Even his skeleton counterpart was looking at him oddly.

“hm? peachy. just… you know, contemplatin’ the complex flavors of fries and ketchup. serious stuff.” He answered, perfectly sincere. Flowey squinted at him skeptically, of course, unable to really understand the entirely mundane and strange machinations of his mind. Sans paid both of them little mind as he proceeded to dig into the rest of his fries, and as he did so, made a mental note to either use a fork next time or not just dump the ketchup on top.

Eventually, and unfortunately, his counterpart again spoke up while he ate.

“ya’ know, it’d be a whole lot easier for everyone if you just gave up.” He interjected with a deceptively amicable tone.

Sans’ hands paused for just a brief moment before continuing without missing a beat. He made a falsely distracted hum, as if he neither cared nor was he paying attention. But of course, that wasn’t true.

“i dunno what you’ve heard about the state of things…” Red continued in a low voice, leaning just outside of his personal space, but close enough that it ensured that this conversation would only be heard between them, flowers and any possible ghosts included. 

“but the king wants your soul. just about the entire underground does. and you’ve seen how monsters are.” Can be, Sans quietly corrected to himself, still nonchalantly eating, although perhaps just a tad slower than before. Entirely by coincidence of course.

“...i don’t really care about that kind of stuff anymore, though, so that’s not the point.” He continued, dismissive.

“then what is your point?” Sans pressed while still managing to act like it was entirely outside of his interest.

He could sense Red become just a tad annoyed with him, but it was mostly kept out of his attitude.

“my point is you should just give up while yer’ ahead. considerin’ all the stuff out there—and trust me, i know plenty of other monsters who’re way more dangerous than papyrus—it’d be easier for me, you, papyrus…and well, just about the rest of monsterkind too.” He flippantly stated, shrugging.

“i dunno, kinda just seems you’re trying to get out of work.” he shrugged right back, grinning just slightly at Red’s clearly irritated furrowed brow, which shifted into full blown pissed off as he continued.

“or maybe you just don’t want papyrus to have to do any dirty work?” Judging from his own knowledge, as well as the look on Red’s face, he thought this was likely. It was one of the reasons, at least.

“that is not what this is about.” he objected with a growl, and what he said seemed at least partially true.

He found amusement at his counterpart’s frustration, and yet…that feeling wasn’t entirely honest. He was arguing back, but frankly, Sans felt himself agreeing with the skeleton. When he talked, he understood what he was feeling and—at least partly—why. To be Sans was to give up when things got tough, he felt: not like his brother, who never gave up, and was always the coolest. Was he perhaps being too hard on himself? Maybe a little…he was self-aware enough to admit that, but it didn’t really change anything. 

He sympathized with Red. Why even try? He had put his best effort forward several times in his life, and in the end they had all amounted to nothing except for Papyrus. His work, his dreams, going back, moving forward on the surface, only to have it ripped from him again—that, now that Sans had this soul and determination, he at least remembered clearly. 

So why try now?

Well…things were a little different this time. He tried to remind himself, anyway. He was human, the timeline was in his hands, and he was…determined. It was an uncomfortable, disgusting feeling. But at the same time…it was kind of nice. But it was mostly terrifying. He wanted to change; it was like a little voice in the back of his head that was telling him to do something, to be better. To try.

But Sans was scared of changing himself. He didn’t want to take that leap of faith, he didn’t want all his efforts to end up in the trash like they always did.

However, in the end, he knew that niggling feeling would end up catching up with him, he thought so with bitter amusement. A complicated feeling of apprehension, fear, and…relief filled his chest. Human determination was not that flimsy. Or perhaps, it was Frisk’s determination that was truly special.

Sans closed his eyes, grin and voice still perfectly casual, but there was a newfound edge of seriousness to it, that he was certain Red picked up on.

“sorry, but i can’t do that.”

Red stared at him for a while. Sans wondered if he was going to say anything for a while. But, in the end he just clicked his tongue, annoyed and exasperated, but accepting.

“fine, have it your way. just don’t say i never warned you.”

Sans waved his hand dismissively, shrugging. “no problem pal, feel free to use the ‘i told you so’ pass if that ever actually happens, but…” He glanced over, an inscrutable grin on his face. 

“there’s no need to be so negative right off the bat, don’t ya’ think?” Red only rolled his eye, apparently swiftly disregarding that idea.

“humans sure are optimists, huh?” He huffed cynically, taking a drink out of some alcohol that Grillby had apparently set down without him noticing. At his question, Sans tilted his head slightly in consideration even though it hadn’t really been one. 

He couldn’t see it, but Flowey had a distant and look filled with consternation on his face, drooping slightly. 

Sans kind of remembered thinking something similar before—watching Frisk move forward so determinedly, finding it within their soul to forgive and spare the monsters who had previously caused them harm, not letting anything really get them down…But that hadn’t been the end. They had persevered through thick and thin, but that wasn’t optimism.

“hm, i dunno…” Sans hummed non-committedly. He wasn’t even sure himself what he thought. “maybe monsters are just way too pessimistic?” He suggested with a grin; that at least, was something he thought was true. In this world anyways. Where he was from, monsters were generally always painfully optimistic, even when it was hard. Not like him at all.

Red snorted, looking just a little resentful. “like we got any choice.” He said, leaning back in his stool. Their conversation apparently no longer had any reason to be private.

Technically, they did have a choice, and that was the key to ending this cycle of negativity, he thought. But, it would be pretty ignorant to say that confidently at the moment when he still didn’t fully understand their circumstances, nor had he even seen the rest of the Underground yet. And it’s not like he had really done anything especially profound yet either, so it would come up empty. For the average person, he knew it wasn’t that simple. In the end, he just shrugged, not seeming to agree or disagree, even though in his soul he really did want to disagree.

After that Red finally got up, burger somehow apparently haven been eaten while Sans wasn’t looking. He was grabbed by the arm, but Sans was kind of expecting it this time so he quickly slid off the stool to ensure he didn’t get pulled onto the floor.

“Would it kill you to be a little less forceful?” Flowey complained on his behalf, but the skeleton just snorted derisively and said nothing in response. That was apparently a no.

Before they could leave, Grillby reappeared across the counter, arms folded and from what Sans could tell, a little ticked off. Grillby was a hard man to read, but he obviously had practice.

“Your tab, Sans….”

Red backed away by the inch, scratching the back of his neck with a grin, not looking interested in paying whatsoever. Him and Grillby were apparently on good enough terms for him to have a tab at all, but Sans wasn’t sure if Red was very good about paying it. Sans, at least, had always paid Grillby by the end of the month. As lazy as he was, he’d feel too bad leaving a friend unpaid for that long.

He was feeling nostalgic already…And because of that, before the bartender could grill into Red any more, Sans stepped up to the counter and wordlessly put a fat stack of Gs on top of it, which immediately drew the eyes of just about the entire room. Flowey in particular balked at the amount, which was in truth a portion of his savings that he had somehow carried with him.

He wasn’t exactly anticipating the attention, but okay.

“this seems like a golden opportunity to do my good deed for the day; this should cover some of it, right?” Sans didn’t really know how big Red’s tab was, and depending on the amount he wasn’t quite sure he wanted to pay for all of it, so he just put down what he was willing.

“....Yes….” Grillby said slowly; although he quickly took the coin before Sans could possibly change his mind, the man still appeared rather shell-shocked. Actually, the entire bar did, to a strange and honestly uncomfortable degree. Like they genuinely couldn’t even believe it, like they had never even seen a simple act of generosity before.

Red especially looked flabbergasted, and even ticked off, for whatever reason. He blinked away the remaining surprise before clicking his tongue and roughly grabbing Sans by the shoulder and forced him towards the exit. Sans had no reason to resist, and simply went along as casual as can be, and gave a small wave to the drunk bunny that cooed at him on their way out.

“what the hell was that!” The skeleton hissed at him even while dragging him to a slightly more private area than in front of Grillby’s front door.

“what was what?” He played dumb for the hell of it. Although, he also was a tad confused on what the big deal was.

“you…you…!” Red seemed entirely lost for words as he let him go in a private corner of town and flailed his hands about. Sans just tilted his head. Flowey, clearly seeing that he didn’t quite get what the fuss about, sighed.

“people don’t usually give out big favors for free, you know, and have you forgotten that he literally is trying to kill you?!” The flower lectured him. Not that Sans cared much. However, he did feel like he knew that already, at least on a surface level. Perhaps he just didn’t fully comprehend how deep it went.

“what that weed said! i literally asked if you’d give up an’ die and you pay off my tab?! what are you getting at?” Red glared at him in suspicion, like Sans was trying to pull one over him. But truly, (although that kind of sounded like something he’d do) he was not.

“i just felt like it, and i had g’s to spare—so what? ever heard of the phrase ‘don’t look a gift-horse in the mouth’? it’s a human thing.” He had seen it in a human book before, anyway. “hmm maybe you could say “gyft-horse” instead, heheh…”

Red groaned at that, a mix of incredulous, frustrated, and amused all at once; how delightful.

“you’re a straight up weirdo.” 

“wow thanks, you really know how to pay a guy a compliment.” Sans replied immediately, pretending to sound entirely genuine and putting on his finest happy face. He wondered if it was extra convincing with this human face of his. He certainly didn’t mind being called weird, though—it was entirely true and he brooked no argument.

“by the way…” Sans began, completely changing the subject, “I want to look around town a little bit.”

Red narrowed his eyes at him, not suspicious, just confused and annoyed. Obviously he wasn’t keen on showing him around.

“why?” But he didn’t completely turn him down, surprisingly.

“somethin’ strange about a little curiosity?” Sans shrugged, grinning. And it was even true; he wanted at least a small look at the town he had once lived in as it was now. Plus, it’d be nice to try out some cinnamon buns if they were available…

“think of it as…i dunno, my final request until i kick the bucket, or somethin’.” Not that he was planning on dying, anyways.

With a groaning face-palm that held vast amounts of exasperation and incredulity, Red finally relented, much faster than Sans thought he would.

“ya know what, fine. let’s take a look around this shit-hole before ya’ die.” 

“yay!” he celebrated with a heavy dose of exaggerated enthusiasm just to grind the grumpy skeleton’s gears a tiny bit more. He merely received an eye roll.

Sans followed Red out of the private little area and out onto the open bits of town. There were monsters here and there, and he could see their eyes turn onto him the instant he was visible, but saying nothing. He looked around in an interested fashion, as it was his first real chance to see snowdin properly, but he at least had the mind to do it somewhat subtly; he could imagine that looking around like a wide eyed newcomer would only bring more scrutiny upon him, if that was even possible. 

Although curiously he could also feel eyes boring into the person close next to him, that was of course, Red. Or well, this world’s Sans. It felt like it was coming from eyes unseen—hostile, and waiting, though not with an edge of urgency. Still…even though he wasn’t the one mostly being watched by these particular eyes, it made his skin bristle uncomfortably. 

“heh. ya feel that?” Red’s low voice intoned towards him quietly. He had apparently managed to notice Sans’ reaction, and just grinned sardonically.

Sans’ expression paused slightly before he corrected it, shrugging.

“yeah…what is it?”

His counterpart just waved a flippant hand about, like it was nothing to be concerned about. But, now that Sans was looking closely he thought he sensed a perpetual…uncomfortableness about him. He wasn’t sure how he hadn’t seen it before, but perhaps it was just accentuated out here.

“enemies.” He said simply, shrugging. “the town could be worse with papyrus here now, but lots of folks don’t really care for that kinda order.”

Sans blinked, just a little surprised at the forthcomingness of the skeleton. Perhaps he really was treating this like a pre-death luxury.

“snowdin’s on the fringes ya’ see, not a lot a’ decent guards round here…except for of course, my bro.”

Sans felt like he kind of understood the situation now, even if Red didn’t continue. Snowdin was indeed quite far from most of the royal guards and most monsters didn’t come around since it was so cold and far from the city. Course, the lack of order hadn’t really become a problem for his pleasant little town, but here? It was definitely a problem. 

So, plenty of shadier monsters had probably made their home here. Those were definitely the particularly malicious eyes he felt.

But…when Papyrus came and eventually gained authority in the guard, that all changed. Papyrus wasn’t exactly one to back down when he wanted to create positive change, and this edgy Papyrus had the will to put his foot down when things got nasty. So those shady folks had faded into the background. He could tell, too. The town was a little uncomfortable, but it was much better than it could have been.

However, it seemed all that building animosity of the nastier parts of town weren’t satisfied, and Red, Papyrus’ supposedly weaker brother, took on a large amount of distant—and perhaps even not so distant— intimidation.

That must be the reason Red would much rather take a shortcut than walk through town, like he had mentioned before. Sans was, admittedly, a bit concerned for his counterpart.

“uh, that seems rough, buddy.” His eyes widened just a tad, and he was pretty sure his typical grin pulled itself into what felt more like a grimace. He hadn’t really meant to, his human face was just much more expressive when he wasn’t paying it special attention.

Red seemed momentarily taken aback by the genuine concern, but quickly erased it. Maybe he was getting used to Sans’ whole ‘be genuinely nice’ deal.

“right…” His face pretty much screamed ‘this guy is an idiot’ while he rolled his eyes, but Sans got the sense it was at least partially manufactured. Progress!

“have you mentioned it to papyrus?” Sans continued, but Red just gave him a small glare for his trouble.

“no way, my bro is busy enough, he doesn’t need more shit to worry about. it’ll only mess him up. i can handle this at least.” 

Sans hummed in uncertain skepticism, but it was hard for him to say much. Assumedly, this Sans was capable of defending himself, but still…1 HP was 1 HP; having to stay on guard all the time was…

But there was nothing he could say—it was for the sake of Papyrus, and he’d be the number one hypocrite in the world if he argued against that. In the end he just shrugged.

“well, havin’ more information bout’ things going on is usually a good thing.” He eventually said, and it was true enough, even if he didn’t think Red cared enough about it.

“whatever, are we just about done here? there’s not really much to see round’ this shit-hole ya’ know.” 

Sans repressed a sigh at the change in subject, but he glanced around anyway. He caught sight of a certain little shop near the entrance of town and he subtly pointed at it.

“i want to go there, please and thank you,” Grinning as the skeleton next to him groaned. But maybe Red was more soft-hearted than he thought, because in the end he failed to make any more complaints about the request, or maybe he had just given up.

When they had eventually stepped up to the door, his counterpart just leaned on the wall next to the door instead of looking to go in. With a gesture of his lone red eye, Sans could tell he meant for him and Flowey to just go in alone. Sans had no qualms against this in particular, so he just stepped forward and pulled the door open.

The room was honestly not entirely dissimilar to what he remembered. It was a little dimmer, and a bit more sparse, but it certainly looked like someone was trying to make this a proper home and place to shop. It had a resilience about it that he appreciated.

“Hm, welcome.” The shop bunny across the counter had her eyes on him immediately, they also glanced at the flower he was holding as well. She was wary, but not entirely unwelcoming. It was a business after all.

“sup, havin’ a good day?” He grinned, about as genuine as he usually was when chatting with her, at least in his Underground.

She just raised a brow at his friendly question, but didn’t dismiss it as much as she could have. “...Not bad I guess, but if you wanna make small talk, you better buy something.”

Sans simply shrugged, unbothered. He was looking to buy something, after all. He eyed the sweet smelling cinnamon buns she had stocked; they were so remarkably similar looking to how he remembered them.

“two of those things, and…” His eyes wandered. He felt his gaze rest on a vaguely familiar item.
An orange bandana with cartoon-ish muscles pictured onto it.

His memories were still a little scrambled, and some of them he didn’t even recognize as his own, but he remembered seeing the kid wear that before, and he also remembered something about buying it in this very shop. He was immediately able to pick that out as a foreign memory, however.

Flowey’s breath hitched as his eyes caught up with Sans' own gaze, “i want that if you’re selling it.”

The bunny glanced up from where she had been picking out two cinnamon buns and putting them in a nice little bag.

“Oh, that…Yeah, I’m sellin’ it I guess.” She confirmed, eyes narrowed and distant as she thought about something. The bunny turned to him then, leaning over the counter casually as she reached out to give him the pastries.

He went to grab them, but her next words froze him momentarily.

“Hm...You’re human, right?” 

Quietly, he received the buns and put them in his inventory, even as Flowey was entirely still.

“what gave you that impression?” Sans asked, though he didn’t really bother trying to divert her much. The bunny leaning over the counter just scoffed.

“It's pretty obvious to anyone who's seen a human before; to be fair, I've never seen one with white hair, but I've definitely seen that flower sticking to humans before, too.” Her eyes shifted onto the flower who was indeed sticking quite close to him, and Flowey glared at her, obviously annoyed with both her and himself.

Sans, in contrast, just shrugged casually. 

“and? are you gonna do somethin’ about it?” 

The bunny let out a short and loud laugh at that, “Do somethin? No way—I guess you could get in a bit a’ trouble for not reportin’ one, but it sure as hell ain’t my job to go human huntin’. That’s what the guard’s for. I’m just here to run a business.”

He grinned and nodded as he passed over the appropriate G’s (while also putting the bandana he had bought away in his inventory for safe keeping). 

“sounds good to me…can you tell me a bit about what it’s like around here?” He asked then, watching her face twist up in begrudging amusement.

“Oh I see, now that you bought somethin’ you wanna make small talk. Fine, I’ll bite.” She shrugged, resting a face on her hand as she settled on the counter.

“Hm, what’s there even to say?”

“what about those skeletons?” 

She blinked at that, “Oh, them? They’re pretty interestin’ I guess. They just kinda came one day, “ the bunny shrugged as she thought back, “Once that Papyrus made his way up the guard though and got put in charge, things really changed around here. They’re both weird, and not everyone likes them, but I’d say things have definitely gotten better for honest folk with that guy keepin’ the reins.”

She nodded to herself and continued; she seemed pretty willing to just chitchat, for all her previous standoffishness.

“But ya know, it’s still only relative. Stuck down here…people have a tough time enduring; I guess it makes that Papyrus guy even more impressive.” She shook her head slowly, both impressed and unbelieving.

And Sans of course nodded agreeably—Papyrus was amazing, even if it wasn’t his brother.

“People are desperate to get out…but sometimes I wonder if we obsess over it too much and act like it’ll all go away as long as we can just get that.” 

That…was a reasonable thought. Getting out of the Underground wouldn’t necessarily entirely erase the bad cultivated in this society, but it seemed like for a lot of people, it was the only real thing they had to cling to. And with the final soul so close, it deepened that feeling even more.

She then suddenly waved her hand about as if to dismiss her previous thought.

“Meh, honestly though not being so cooped up and smooshed together so much would have to make things a little better at least, and maybe a bit of sunlight is all those grouches need to wake up.” She snorted, awfully blase about the whole affair. Sans admired her attitude.

“hm you may be onto something there.” He grinned, deciding to set the matter of rehabilitating the monster race for later. In the end, it would be tough to make change as things were, anyways.

Eventually though, he figured he shouldn’t keep the skeleton outside waiting any longer.

“welp, it was nice to chat, but i should probably be going. important human business to attend to.” And it wasn’t even entirely wrong.

The shopkeeper squinted her eyes at him, appearing to be just a little lost in thought, it had a somber twinge.

“Well, don’t die I guess.” It was said so casually; quite fitting for this world. “Heh, I wonder if I could get in trouble for saying that?” She snorted to herself.

Sans waved his hand about casually, his maximum confidence reassuring her somewhat. 

“you don’t gotta worry about that—not dyin’s my specialty,” He paused for a moment, “especially now.” Being a save point using human kind of did that to you.

She laughed out loud at that, “Glad to hear it, see you.” 

What a pleasant encounter, and he got some interesting information from it. And some delicious cinnamon buns…he assumed anyways, he hadn’t quite gotten the chance to eat one and they had ended up going straight into his inventory. Oh well, he wasn’t really hungry right now, and they would be well served later.

When Sans finally walked out the door, Red was…not there? In the split second that Sans sensed his location through magic, a skeletal hand placed itself on his shoulder. Unfortunately, he was unable to stop himself from jumping in his spot. He was seriously not used to being snuck up on. How annoying.

Still, he at least was able to school his voice and face, merely turning his head and giving Red a mildly exasperated but undeniably amused expression. 

“scare ya?” he asked, shit-eating grin already knowing the answer. Sans was rather determined to not let his other self fluster the unflusterable, so he just rolled his eyes and grinned, unbothered.

Red seemed just a tad irritated at his lack of reaction, but it was quickly set aside.

“ready?” He asked with suspicious casualness.

“ready for what-” Sans began before being abruptly cut off by a short cut. Immediately checking his surroundings, beyond him was a misty path that was impossible to see through—the path to Waterfall.

“Hmph, now you know how it feels to be cut off…”

The confrontation with Papyrus was just in front of them, and Sans really wasn’t looking forward to it. 

Chapter Text

The snow around them was heavy, just how Sans remembered it…but it was even more oppressive, somehow. Sans put up a thin barrier of subtle blue magic to stop it from turning him into a human popsicle, unwilling to completely freeze over again.

"Papyrus is here…" he heard Flowey mutter, and Sans nodded distractedly, already aware and able to feel the spiky variant of his brother's very recognizable magic.

To be honest, Sans really wasn't looking forward to this—go figure. If he got into a FIGHT, then there was no way to avoid looking at Papyrus' stats. He supposed it was silly to avoid it forever, given he had to consciously avoid looking at it every time the skeleton came near...but still. Sans was a procrastinator through and through. 

"hm, think he'll let me go all peaceful like if I annoy him enough?" Sans asked hopelessly, already taking a big, deep sigh.

Flowey merely graced him with a roll of his eyes. Rude.

"welp." He finally decided to stop wasting time and just start walking forward.

The small layer of blue magic didn’t really help him see very far ahead, but he could sense himself getting closer to that spiky ball of magic in front of him. Eventually, as the blizzard thinned out some, it was finally possible to catch a glimpse of Papyrus’ face.

It was drawn into a look of consternation, brows furrowed in a ghost of his brother's usual serious-type expression. Perhaps it was the scar streaked across his eye, or the sharp lines of his face, but it felt far more weighty than his Papyrus’ ever had. Sans didn’t like it at all.

“HUMAN…SO YOU’VE ARRIVED.” Papyrus looked unsure of himself for a mere moment, almost like he had hoped Sans would never come. But it was gone nearly as quickly as it had appeared.

Sans shrugged, “not like there’s anywhere else i could go, right?” He replied. This certainly was the only way to Waterfall from Snowdin, unless you took the Riverperson’s boat, of course.

Not that any of that made a difference to Sans, but he wasn’t going to say that.

“HMPH…WELL, YOU SHOULD BE WELL AWARE OF WHAT WE ARE TO DO NOW.” Papyrus crossed his arms, squinting at him. “AND...SANS DID FEED YOU, YES?”

Sans snorted quietly; Papyrus certainly was hilarious, worrying about that despite his obvious intent to kill him.

“sure did, even showed me around a little.” 

Papyrus seemed mildly surprised at his answer, but nodded, satisfied.

“GOOD THEN. LET US NOT WASTE TIME.” And just like that, Sans was pulled into a FIGHT. It startled him just a bit, prepared for Papyrus to go on for much longer like usual. It appeared he was forgoing such dramatics.

Before anything else, Sans quickly set Flowey off to the side, a comfortable distance from the range of bullets, but even if some strayed, he was sure Flowey could take care of himself.

Papyrus merely glanced at the flower once, keeping his gaze locked onto the human in front of him. It seemed like the skeleton was treating this fight extremely seriously, like a battle to the death. Though, if Sans didn’t know any better, he thought he looked none too happy about it.

What a showdown…Sans didn’t really have much mind to think about it though, because…

Well, it was kind of hard to not see someone’s LV and EXP when he was in a fight. It was impossible to look away. Papyrus…well, he certainly wasn’t devoid of EXP, that was for sure. His Level of Violence was a bit lower than one might expect for his EXP count, but in Sans’ opinion, they weren’t insignificant numbers. LV 3…was still far, far higher than Papyrus should ever be.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t been expecting it, Red was even a higher level than Papyrus, despite his previous assertion that he was too weak and cowardly to kill anyone, but he still…It felt like a bitter rock in his stomach. What kind of world was this where it had led to Papyrus of all people killing others just to survive? It was awful…he wanted to change it.

The will to change this world’s fate shined like a distant beacon in his soul. Yearning, wanting , but still weak.

Sans then found himself dodging an array of bone attacks, faster than his brother had ever dared using on the human, but somehow a little slower than he expected. Sans looked at Papyrus; he was testing the waters.

“I SEE YOU ARE NOT ENTIRELY UNPROFICIENT, BUT DO NOT THINK I WILL CONTINUE TO TAKE IT EASY ON YOU, I WILL NOT FAIL.” 

Sans didn’t attack back, obviously. “i’ll hold you to that, i guess. but what’s so bad about failing?”

Papyrus stared at him as if he had grown a second head, then sputtered, “ WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?! ” He quickly launched a faster and more complicated pattern of bones at him, which Sans cleanly avoided, much to the skeleton’s displeasure.

Sans chuckled, “i think it’s a pretty fair one, from my position.”

Papyrus’ eyes narrowed, mouth pulling down into a resolute expression. “BECAUSE I HAVE TO, I AM A MEMBER OF THE ROYAL GUARD! AND…TO PROTECT WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT.” 

Sans closed his eyes for a moment as he skipped another turn. “hm, i can get that. but is killing me really going to accomplish that? and anyways, you’re a pretty incredible guard, human killing or no.” 

Papyrus’ face was pulled in all sorts of directions, gleeful pride for Sans’ complement, a brief, anxious frown, and just a touch of uncertainty.

“IT WILL! THERE’S NO OTHER CHOICE!” Papyrus asserted, stubbornly stomping his foot on the ground despite the sprout of indecision that was, to Sans, clearly written all over his face. Extra pointy or no, Sans could read his brother’s expressions like a book.

“why?” It was a simple question, and perhaps it didn’t fully encapsulate all the struggles and hardships living down here invited, but it froze Papyrus regardless.

Papyrus looked stunned for the moment, but quickly shook his head and glared, a vicious bone attack being flung his way. Even so, Sans dodged it and once again skipped his turn with a spare.

“UGH, WHY DO YOU NOT FIGHT BACK?” He complained, frustrated with the way this fight was turning out. Perhaps he had hardened his heart and hoped it would be simple, but that’d never happen if the one he was fighting was Sans.

“heh, i’ve heard that one before,” he grinned, “i don’t want to hurt you, so i won’t fight. that’s all.” He said casually.

Papyrus made a funny noise of bewilderment and frustration, looking painfully familiar to his own brother when he was incredulous about something he couldn’t understand.

“WHAT?! IF YOU DON’T, YOU’LL DIE .” Perhaps Papyrus could have made sense of it if Sans had accepted death from the beginning, but given the human hadn’t taken even a single point of damage so far, that clearly was not the case.

“maybe.” Sans responded with a hum, shrugging. Even when things seemed completely hopeless, there were always options someone could choose. Though whether the consequences are desirable or worth it was an entirely different matter.

“but this is my choice.”

Papyrus had no response, it didn’t look like he could even muster up a single thing to say. 

Instead…despite his shaken visage, he steeled himself a little further and in that same moment, Sans felt his soul turn blue— this is where the real fight began.

Of course —Sans thought as he maneuvered through the minefield of deadly bones and subtly sunk his own blue magic into his soul to gain better control over his movements—it was easy for him to say he wouldn’t fight; given his abilities, he always had a way to escape, to control, or make the situation conform to his needs (or just a good joke). But largely…the inhabitants of this Underground didn’t have such convenient tools at their disposal. If someone was hurting them, it might really be kill or be killed.

It wasn’t right, but it was true. It made him a bit introspective—with his abilities, had he done the right thing? Had he lived up to the question he had asked the human? Was there something else he could have done? Should have done? They were all pointless thoughts now, but he couldn’t help but dwell on them.

Now though… he undoubtedly had a truly special power. And if he didn’t want to be a hypocrite, then he should strive to do the right thing. That was what he wanted this sullied determination to be used for, now that he of all people had inherited it. The people of this world didn’t deserve to die any more than his friends and family ever had, even despite their twisted actions.

…And really, it wasn’t like any of them could sink any lower than Frisk already had.

But man, it really was a shame that he was the one who had to fix things—so much work... Not to mention lonely. It was especially a lot of work when it came to dodging so many deadly attacks, as he was right this very second.

Papyrus really wasn’t messing around, even despite the increasingly frustrated look on his face as he flung deadly bullet patterns and the like at him. Unfortunately for the frazzled skeleton, although their attacks were definitely not one in the same (his brother would have never used such blatantly lethal attacks, after all), Sans was intimately familiar with his brother’s patterns, having watched him carefully develop them with the same care he gave to all his puzzles.

It made his heart hurt.

But the point was that dodging Papyrus’ attacks were particularly easy for him, though they were nonetheless exhausting. Even then, it seemed like Papyrus was getting frustrated faster than Sans was getting tired, by some miracle.

“UGH, WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU HUMAN? ARE YOU DEFECTIVE?” Papyrus groaned, almost looking genuinely considerate of the idea that Sans could perhaps be a flawed product. Well, it wasn’t entirely untrue, but…

“YOU’RE SO…SO WEAK…WHY DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU MUST FIGHT TO BECOME STRONGER?” Papyrus looked at Sans, who was huffing and puffing despite his flawless dodging maneuvers, but very pointedly skipping each of his turns with a spare, leaving him even more vulnerable.

“WHAT ARE YOUR GOALS?”

Another dodge.

“YOU’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO REACH THEM WITHOUT BECOMING STRONGER.”

Sans jumped through a narrow gap of bones.

“WHAT ARE YOU…WHAT ARE YOU FIGHTING FOR?”

Sans skipped his turn with a Spare yet again, putting a hand to his chest as he felt his human heart beat so quickly he couldn’t help but be concerned. 

Papyrus probably didn’t realize it, but he had such a pitiful look on his face right now. It hurt more than his heaving chest ever could. He seemed lost, and Sans supposed that he at least deserved a bit of his rare brand of honesty.

“because i don’t think anyone deserves to die.” He was a bit surprised at how genuine it felt to say that, despite the cold anger and disdain he had always felt for the human ever since their genocidal escapades.

He hated them. But…it never felt good to kill them, either. It just felt hollow, standing there with the bloody remains of a human child at his feet, hoping beyond hope that they'd finally give up. Turn in the towel. Become a good person, if they ever cared to try. Now with the human soul, he remembered hundreds upon hundreds of corpses, all the same person, and all by the same hand. It was sickening, even if they had deserved it.

“and things will never change if you don’t try.” Even when it was hard, so hard you might die a few dozen times before you got it right. It wasn’t reasonable to expect everyone to be able to strive for this. That was why…those with power above others, the power to control their fates, should strive to do the right thing even when they cannot.

“BUT…BUT I…” Papyrus faltered, his attacks going off course. Sans simply stepped to the side to dodge them.

“IF I GIVE UP, WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO SANS? TO UNDYNE? THE CITIZENS OF SNOWDIN THAT I SWORE TO PROTECT?” Papyrus questioned him, desperate for an answer. He clearly had not wanted to fight him in the first place.

Sans closed his eyes for a moment.

“honestly…who knows.” 

“...WHAT?”

“the future is always…uh, uncertain.” Saying that felt strange on his tongue, when life had felt stagnant for so very long. “and life’s full of hard choices. but…”

He looked up at his brother’s counterpart, so different, and yet right now, all he could see were similarities.

“you’ll never find out what’ll happen, good or bad, if you never try.”

Papyrus lowered his head. It startled him a tad—Papyrus never did that. His fists were curled into tight balls, and his expression was…complicated. It made Sans’ heart clench, he didn’t want his brother to go through any sort of pain, none at all.

“ORIGINALLY…I WORKED FOR THIS POSITION SO I COULD PROTECT HIM …AND…I ALSO WANTED TO BE ABLE TO STAND UP FOR THOSE WHO COULD NOT STAND UP FOR THEMSELVES.”

His shoulders, which had seemed so proud, slumped.

“AND YET…HERE I AM, FIGHTING YOU…” He sighed, and then stood back up a little straighter, crossing his arms indignantly. “EVEN WHEN YOU’RE SO WEAK! UGH, YOU’RE JUST LIKE MY NO GOOD BROTHER!”

Sans huffed out a laugh at that, shrugging his shoulders, though the way Papyrus spoke about his brother did strike some unease throughout his chest. He was not talking about him , and Red and Papyrus had a rather different relationship than he and…his brother did. Had. Whatever.

“uh, my bad?”

Papyrus tutted and scoffed, like he had been expecting that answer and yet somehow still disappointed. Suddenly, his mood shifted again, and it made Sans stand up a little straighter while his eye sockets bored into him.

“BUT…ALTHOUGH YOU ARE WEAK. YOU ARE ALSO STRONG! YOU HAVE…YOU HAVE UPHELD MY IDEALS BETTER THAN I HAVE.”

“oh.”

Papyrus through his hands in the air, frustrated. “WHAT AN EMBARRASSMENT!!” The skeleton brushed his scarf back behind him and let it blow in the magic wind that definitely wasn’t there before, looking proud and arrogant: which is to say, much more like his usual self.

“BUT NO LONGER! THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS NEVER FAILS! I WILL ELECT TO GRANT YOU MERCY HUMAN. I HAVE BEEN INSPIRED BY YOU!”

“wow, that’s quite the honor.”

“ISN’T IT?!” Papyrus boasted and laughed like a super villain, it kinda contradicted the whole mercy thing, but oh well. Sans was 100% certain he had practiced it. He glanced over—Papyrus’ name was yellow. He let out a sigh, releasing the tension in his chest that he hadn’t realized had been building all this time. His pseudo-brother kinda sorta trying to kill him hadn’t been very uh…conducive to sound mental health? Yeah.

He Spared Papyrus.

“ALAS…NOW THAT WE ARE NO LONGER FIGHTING, I NO LONGER HAVE A HUMAN RIVAL! SIGH…” 

“uh well, we could be friends instead? i heard that’s pretty much the same thing.” He reasoned, using a bit of blue magic to put Flowey’s pot back into his hands while he did so (leading to a very disgruntled flower) when Papyrus wasn’t looking.

“FRIENDS…? HM.” Papyrus put his fingers to his chin as if he was carefully considering, but Sans could tell from the twitch of his brow and the way his eyes shifted rapidly back and forth that it was a facade.

“W-WELL! I SUPPOSE!! THAT WILL HAVE TO DO! NYEH HEH…I WILL TEACH YOU EVERYTHING I KNOW HUMAN! I’LL EVEN LET YOU SEE THE VALIANT WORK I DO!!”

“heheh. sounds cool.”

“IT IS!! AH…ALSO…” Papyrus turned more serious for a moment. “IN LIGHT OF OUR… FRIENDSHIP …I SHALL ALSO GIVE YOU DIRECTIONS TO THE BARRIER, THE THING KEEPING MONSTERKIND TRAPPED UNDERGROUND.”

Sans didn’t exactly need directions , but he listened closely regardless.

“YOU WILL NEED TO PASS THROUGH WATERFALL AND HOTLAND UNTIL YOU REACH THE KING’S CASTLE, THAT IS WHERE THE BARRIER IS!”

“HOWEVER…YOU WILL NEED TO GET PAST ASGORE. HE IS…WELL NO ONE REALLY KNOWS MUCH ABOUT HIM! BUT HE’LL PROBABLY TRY AND KILL YOU, SO AVOID THAT!”

“uh, right. noted.” He saw Flowey roll his eyes out of the corner of his eye.

“UNDYNE’S ALSO IN WATERFALL, SHE’LL ALSO PROBABLY TRY TO KILL YOU!”

“Who would have guessed…” the flower groused.

“I’M SURE YOU CAN HANDLE IT THOUGH! FOR NOW…I HAVE PATROL SOON, FEEL FREE TO JOIN ME IF YOU WISH TO LOOK UPON MY GREATNESS FOR A WHILE LONGER!”

“wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Sans confirmed. And with that, Papyrus made his leave, somehow managing to look dignified even though he had technically spectacularly failed in what he was supposed to do.

“...well, that was something.” Sans huffed, adrenaline having slowly been winding down and taking his breath away. He was seriously getting a workout. Not to mention the emotional exhaustion. When this was over he was taking a nice three day minimum 'hanging out in his bed all day' holiday. Thankfully, he didn’t pretty much pass out this time.

“No kidding…I…I can’t say I was expecting you to get out of that without even trying to attack.”

“h-heheh, impressed?” He asked, wiping some sweat off his brow.

Flowey fixed him with a judging stare—he was really giving Sans a run for his money. Who exactly was the judge here?

“I wouldn’t say that . Just surprised at your ridiculous luck.”

“hey, would i really be here if i was lucky?”

The flower considered that for a moment. “Hm. Perhaps not.”

“trust me, i’m the unluckiest guy in the world.”

Flowey made some sort of shrugging gesture, apparently unconvinced. There wasn’t much else Sans could say to really argue his case, so he just grinned and shrugged back at him.

“i suppose i should check out this patrol thing papyrus has goin’ on...”

“You’re really planning on doing that?”

He chuckled. “sure, why not?

Flowey rolled his eyes yet again, resigned to Sans’ strange choices. “Yeah, fine, whatever.”

Before that though…Sans walked forward, beyond the fog that had recently begun to dissipate and where Waterfall began. He was pretty sure there was a save point here. If he closed his eyes, he could picture it, right there in front of his old station. The human’s memories, no doubt.

He didn’t necessarily want to save because he was worried he was going to die. He was just…tired. But he didn’t want to sleep yet. (Okay well, he did want to, but he probably shouldn’t when it was still midday). Save points were weird, they also seemed to give him a small burst of energy, filling his body with vitality and renewed will. He hadn’t taken any damage yet, but he was pretty sure they healed, too.

So…yeah, he was going to use it, even though he didn’t feel that great about it.

Red was at the station, holding his head up with his hand, single eye trained onto him as he moved into the dank room. It was a little creepy, but he ignored him in favor of brushing his hand into the glowing light of the save point. Its rays carded through his fingers and filled him with its energy, tingling and exhilarating in a painfully familiar way, as if he’d done it thousands of times. Sans wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to it, but he was getting there. He wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

He let out a breath.

“alrighty then, let’s go check up with papyrus.”

Sans immediately head back the way he came, glad once the stare of his counterpart was no longer at his back. He took a shortcut through the fog, stopping short of the point where Papyrus could spot him. His alternate brother was standing near his house, loudly talking with two snowdin guard dogs. He managed to look very professional and serious in a way his brother never did even when he tried, it was a little strange.

He didn’t want to interrupt, so he just hung back a little, sort of in Papyrus’ field of view if he turned around a little. It didn’t take very long at all for Papyrus to spot him with all his expressive body language though, and he looked quite excited and relieved to see him. Sans suspected he had been worried his new human friend wouldn’t show.

“HU— ER, YOU! I SEE YOU’VE COME TO EXAMINE THE INCREDIBLE WORK OF THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS!” He exclaimed, now completely ignoring the dogs.

Sans took a brief glance at them, but they just looked at him in a mix of wariness and curiosity, which was pretty much the default here.

“yup, couldn’t wait.” He nodded.

“NYEH HEH! WAIT JUST A MOMENT, I AM NEARLY FINISHED GIVING OUT MY ORDERS, COME OBSERVE BEHIND ME.” He pretty much ordered him; it was probably his natural way of telling people what to do. Sans just shrugged and did exactly that, standing behind the skeleton, but far enough away that Sans wouldn’t be smacked in the face by a stray arm by accident.

“NOW, YOU MAY COMMENCE YOUR PATROL OF THE INNER TOWN, I SHALL TAKE THE OUT DISTRICT SOLO.” Sans tilted his head at that, wondering what the ‘out’ district was as he watched the dogs hesitantly but agreeably enact their orders.

“where’s the out district?” 

Papyrus turned back to him now that the guards were gone.

“HM? OH, THAT IS SIMPLY WHAT WE CALL THE MORE…DANGEROUS PARTS OF TOWN. AWAY FROM THE MAIN AREA.”

His brows raised slightly. “huh… are you sure you should go there alone, then?”

Papyrus puffed up his chest and struck a cool and intimidating pose. “HMPH, THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS IS MORE THAN ENOUGH TO HANDLE THOSE DELINQUENTS! BESIDES, I WON’T BE ALONE!”

Flowey looked less than convinced, but Sans just chuckled. “true, i’ll uh…watch your back.”

“VERY GOOD! YOU ARE A QUICK LEARNER!...WELL, EXCEPT FOR WHEN IT COMES TO ATTACKING.” It was sort of phrased like an admonishment, but considering Sans had pretty much beat him despite his apparent flaw, it was weak.

He lazily shrugged and winked. “eh, we all got our weak points…uh, except for the great and terrible papyrus, of course.”

Papyrus puffed up with pride. “ OBVIOUSLY!! NOW LET US NOT WASTE ANY TIME, UNLIKE MY BROTHER WHENEVER HE DOES LITERALLY ANYTHING.”

“heh.” 

“WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT?”

The patrol was pretty normal, at first. Papyrus was actually quite silent while they walked, eye sockets carefully scanning the surrounding area with serious precision. It made Sans begin to feel tense too just by proxy, and he subtly cast his magic around the area to pick out monsters unseen (even though he was somewhat distracted by trying to keep up with Papyrus’ long strides). Flowey, too, seemed cautious…though that wasn’t anything new. There was a harsh grimace on the flower’s face as they went deeper into the paths near the outskirts. Snowdin wasn’t a very big town, Sans knew, but it was bigger than it looked at first.

As they went, things got…shadier, the quaint, quiet town outskirts that he remembered now instead a tense, dark neighborhood where bad people lurked. The haze of magic that permanently permeated the Underground was full of bad vibes too. Uh, more than usual. He hadn’t really given it too much thought until now, but he wondered how monsters could stand to be surrounded by it all the time, though he wasn’t quite as affected by it as he would have expected-

Ah…it was because he was human. He still had a monster soul, and he still had magic, so he could sense the emotions riding on the waves of magic, but they didn’t pierce his being nearly as much as they usually might. Huh…that was…probably a very potent contributor to the current state of the Underground.

As he was pondering this, he sensed Flowey go rigid in his pot, and Sans focused back into the situation. Haha, the flower would probably yell at him if he found out Sans had spaced out.

A small group of monsters stepped out from the corners caked in shadow, looking incensed. He had the feeling they had been caught doing something they shouldn’t have, but Sans hadn’t been paying attention.

“HALT WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND SHOW YOURSELVES!” Papyrus ordered, looking quite the part of an important and distinguished member of the guard. Sans didn’t feel particularly intimidated by him, but it was fair to assume most other people would. The shady monsters ahead of them certainly did.

Sans managed to peek around Papyrus to get a better look at what the monsters were doing. They seemed to be hunched over…uh, pastries? Maybe? It was hard to tell from this distance. But when Sans glanced up at Papyrus’ face next to him, he saw his eyes narrow; he apparently recognized it.

“THAT’S…”

The monsters didn’t wait around too long to just let them look, and tried darting towards a nearby path, however, they were immediately halted in their tracks by a wall of bones. Papyrus glared at them, lowering his outstretched hand and allowing a long bone to materialize in his hand.

The monsters in front of them turned pale in the realization that there was nowhere to run, flicking venomous gazes onto Papyrus (and sort of him).

“TURN YOURSELF IN AND I WILL SHOW MERCY.” Papyrus warned them. Sans thought it was smartest to do as he said, but perhaps their panic and the fact that Papyrus only had a tiny human with a flower with him gave them courage, because they instead ignored the skeleton’s warning and decided to charge at him with desperate vigor.

“HMPH, STAY BACK HUMAN.”

Ooh, very cool. Sans was content to do exactly as told, unlike these guys.

“no problemo.” 

He got the feeling that Flowey knew he was just glad to not have to do any work and was judging him for it, but it was the safe option, so the flower couldn’t say a thing. Sans simply watched as Papyrus quickly and methodically put down the rampaging criminals with cool precision, though not without a small amount of flair appropriate for a cool guy of his caliber. Papyrus’ confidence in patrolling on his own clearly was not unfounded. Not that Sans had any doubts.

“wow-”

Sans cut himself off when he abruptly stepped to the side, making Flowey let out a yelp. A another monster had tried to take a stab at him from behind, but now they were careening forward with a shocked look on their face now that their target was no longer where he had been a second ago. Papyrus wasn’t yet looking during that brief moment of time, so Sans quickly slammed the guy into the snow with a forceful bit of blue magic. It was sloppy considering its speed and him neglecting to turn the monster’s soul blue, but he was worried he wouldn’t be able to change it back in time before Papyrus looked over.

It all happened in the span of a second or two. By the time Papyrus whipped his skull around to check the commotion (good reaction time, that), Sans already was casually taking a few ginger steps away from the groaning dude.

“huh. that was snow prising.”

Flowey face-palmed, looking like he had just had the soul spooked right out of him. Uh, well, if he had one, anyways. It had occurred to Sans a while ago that he was pretty sure Flowey was soulless.

“That one was atrocious .”

“you’re welcome.”

“ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!” Papyrus asked, eyes flicking from the man on the floor and the innocent human standing next to him.

“yep. he tripped.” He pointedly ignored Flowey’s eyeroll at his ridiculous lie and gestured a vague hand at the monster who had attacked him.

“HOW LUCKY! LUCK IS ONE PART OF BEING AN EXCELLENT GUARD, I SEE MY ABILITIES ARE ALREADY RUBBING OFF ON YOU!”

“hey, you’re the one who did all the real stuff, nice work by the way.”

“WHY THANK YOU HUMAN!” Papyrus replied happily, as if he wasn’t currently tying up some beaten up monsters on the ground after having confirmed that Sans was entirely unscathed. Though thrashed, said monsters did abruptly look his way in surprise, having not realized the random person walking around with Papyrus was, in fact, the human they had heard about. And not even tied up, either.

He kept his distance from the monsters as he walked back up to be behind Papyrus, just in case, but he did carefully step around them to take a look at whatever it was they had been hoarding. Surprisingly, it was exactly how he thought it had looked like from afar: pastries. Spider pastries, to be exact. But…hm, how to put it. They had a strange vibe to them, like twisted intentions and hazy, erratic magic. He opted to not pick it up, in light of that.

“what are these things? uh, aside from the obvious.”

Papyrus answered him while tying up the last monster.

“DRUGS.”

Oh, that was…expected? Unexpected? He supposed he shouldn’t really be surprised. Still…he took another step back from the dangerous sweet. Honestly, he felt some indignation for the apparent desecration of a very delicious item. Muffet (for it must be she who had done this) was definitely on his shit list. Right under Frisk, that was how serious this was.

Papyrus finished up and came to stand next to him, putting bars of bones around the monsters without looking back. In contrast to his very aggressive appearance, he delicately took a plastic baggie and began putting the pastry remains inside.

“THIS WAS…UNEXPECTED. I WAS HOPING THIS WOULD NOT SPREAD TO SNOWDIN. I SEE I WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS MATTER PERSONALLY.”

“sounds rough…” Sans shrugged, for lack of anything better to say.

“Is it already bad in Waterfall?” Flowey asked.

Papyrus turned and faced them and crossed his arms, baggie gone, assumedly into his inventory for safe keeping.

“I’M AFRAID SO. UNDYNE CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH WHEN IT IS CLOSE TO HOTLAND AND THE CAVES OF WATERFALL SO WINDING AND DARK.”

“hm…” Sans assumed the “business” had its origins in Hotland, but Undyne couldn’t really patrol there by herself personally. Even if she went without her armor, she’d be so sluggish she wouldn’t accomplish much. So uh, no go on that. Therefore, she'd never really be able to confront the root of the issue.

“well, good to know, i guess.” 

“INDEED, DO NOT EAT ANY SUSPICIOUS PASTRIES NO MATTER HOW DELICIOUS THEY MAY SEEM!!...OR MOST OTHER SUSPICIOUS ITEMS, SUCH AS GLASS, MOSS, BREAD CRUMBS, CANDY, HOTDOGS-”

Papyrus proceeded to list off many many items, most blatantly inedible. But uh, the warning was appreciated. He was pretty sure Flowey would slap anything unusual out of reach before he even got to touch it and then lecture him though, so it was, uh, ultimately unnecessary.

“should we go back or should we continue the search?” Sans easily interrupted the ranting skeleton, used to getting his brother back on topic when his thoughts were veering too far off track.

“AH! OF COURSE.” Papyrus cleared his non-existent throat. “WE MUST BRING THESE TROUBLEMAKERS BACK WITH US, AFTER THAT YOU ARE FREE TO GO. I’M CERTAIN YOU HAVE LEARNED QUITE A LOT WHILE OBSERVING MY HEROIC EXPLOITS! AND CLAIMING SOME FOR YOUR OWN!”

“oh for sure. i’m still tryin’ to process it all.”

“NYEH HEH! SANS COULD LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM YOU!” 

The corner of his mouth pulled up in a strangely amused grin. He wasn’t sure what to think about that, but it was funny.

“eh, i’m sure he works himself to the bone sometimes.” 

Papyrus screamed indignantly while Flowey groaned quietly.

“ UGH , I TAKE IT BACK.”

After that they began making their way back into the town proper, dragging the shady monsters by a rope behind them and leaving them with a couple other members of the guard. Sans couldn’t help but feel sorry for them. He hoped they weren’t treated too poorly. 

“W-WELL HUMAN…I MUST SAY, IT WAS QUITE…NICE TO GO PATROLLING WITH A…A FRIEND.”

They hadn’t really done all that much together, but maybe Papyrus saw something in the experience he had not. Maybe he just liked having a cheerleader in the back to just witness his fantastic deeds. 

“same here. you’re a great royal guard.” he replied genuinely, though, perhaps, with a hint of wistfulness.

“NYEHEHEHEH….” Papyrus puffed out his chest, cheeks dusted with a self-satisfied blush. He heard Flowey sigh at his antics.

“I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN A HUMAN WOULD UNDERSTAND MY GREATNESS; IT WAS DEFINITELY WORTH KEEPING YOU ALIVE!” 

“heh. for the entertainment value alone, surely.”

“WELL…YOUR JOKES ARE STILL TERRIBLE…”

“oh man, i can’t believe my good friend would say such a thing.”

“ DON’T TRY TO GUILT ME!! ” While Sans was chuckling, Papyrus was sighing.

“WELL, DESPITE YOUR AWFUL JOKES THAT ARE ALMOST AS BAD AS MY USELESS BROTHER, I HAVE DECIDED I WILL GIVE YOU MY PHONE NUMBER! FEEL HONORED.”

“wow, i am.” Sans gave the number a quick glance, but noted with amusement that it was actually the exact same as his own brother’s number. He already had it memorized, but he put the slip of paper given to him in his pocket anyway. He’d insert it into his phone, but the thing was so ancient he decided it wasn’t worth the hassle.

“FEEL FREE TO CALL IF YOU NEED MY EXPERT SURVIVAL ADVICE…AND NOT TO BOTHER ME WITH STUPID PUNS.”

“ darn. ” 

“YOU CAN ALSO STOP AT MY HOUSE HAVE YOU NEED FOR SLEEP…YOU DO SEEM ADDICTED TO IT, MUCH LIKE MY BROTHER…”

“oh yeah, can’t get enough of the stuff.” Hm…a nap sounded really nice right now. Even though he’d only done two (very tiring) things since he last slept. And one slightly tiring thing.

“FAREWELL THEN.” Papyrus scampered off without much more fanfare. He did seem like a pretty busy guy after all. He probably had a meeting with Undyne sometime soon. 

“That guy’s so weird…” Flowey muttered.

“eh, but you gotta admit he’s pretty darn cool, right?”

“...Sure.”

Sans shrugged, not too concerned. “i think i’m gonna take a nap, gotta be prepared for undyne, right?”

“You don’t need to make excuses, just sleep if you want to.” Flowey scoffed, already knowing quite well by now how much Sans liked his sleep. Not to mention how bad his stamina was: the flower could probably sense he was flagging, and his little shot of determination wasn’t enough to stop it.

“heheh. okay okay, if you insist…”

“ I wasn’t- ” Flowey groaned, “You know what! I do insist! Go and sleep you slacker!”

“jeez, what a slave driver.”

Flowey didn’t dignify him with a response outside of many extremely annoyed noises, all entirely unintelligible.

Chapter Text

The very first thing Sans did…was take a nap, of course. He requested that Flowey wake him up in an hour or so. The flower complained about Sans using him like an alarm clock, but really, he agreed quite easily in the end.

Sans kinda wanted to sleep on his own bed…but Red probably wouldn’t appreciate that, so he settled for the couch. It wasn’t like he hadn’t slept there tons already (well, his couch anyways).
He dreamt of sunlight and golden flowers, two very odd things for him of all people to be dreaming about. That probably meant something...oh well.

When he finally opened his eyes, it was with great reluctance, greatly disliking the grave heaviness of human eyelids. 

“Finally…you’re impossible to wake up…”

Actually, Sans wasn’t a particularly heavy sleeper despite what all evidence may suggest. But everything about this situation was just so...exhausting. Perhaps he also felt a little more at ease with such a hyper-vigilant flower to keep watch, as baffling as that was.

Of course, Sans didn’t mention any of this. Instead, he just slowly sat up and yawned. His feet lazily plopped onto the floor (while simultaneously retrieving and putting on a stray fuzzy slipper), and then pulled his arms back into a large stretch. It was equal parts unsettling and deeply satisfying feeling his newfound fleshy bits stretch, and not just getting all his bones back in reasonable order. 

So far, the satisfying side kept winning out, but he wasn’t sure he’d ever actually get used to it. But…well…time solves all.

Would there eventually come a time when he knew being human more than monster?

He shook his head to dismiss the thought, somewhat unnerved.

“hm, it’s been about an hour, right?” He asked Flowey, who was still stuck on the couch.

“Of course, did you think I’d forget?”

“nah,” Sans grinned, “just checking.” 

Red should still be at his station around this time.

After grabbing Flowey, he stepped forward and landed into snow, just outside the view of Waterfall up ahead. Flowey, now used to the abrupt changes in scenery, merely sighed.

The air very quickly became humid as the ground shifted into purple and he stepped into the most cave-like part of the entire Underground. Red was looking deceptively bored at his station, but Sans knew better; he was obviously watching him.

“what’s up?” He casually walked up to the stand.

Red gave him an indecipherable grin in return. "huh. you're not dead." 

Sans glanced down at himself as if checking this. 

"huh. seems so." He replied in the exact same inflection as the skeleton across from him. 

"right… but as far as I remember, you fought with Papyrus a while ago."

Sans chuckled, briefly recalling their fight. "what can i say, it seriously wiped me out. your brother's strong, after all." Not to mention the pseudo hangout/patrol they went on together.

Red’s smirk pulled up at the edge just slightly. “he sure is, heh.” Of course, Red had been watching their fight, even if he was basically feigning ignorance, so he already knew everything that had gone down. Though not what had happened after the fight.

“hm, why not join me for some grillby’s in celebration? ain’t every day you survive the great and terrible papyrus.” The skeleton lazily stood up from behind the station, a single red eye staring at him even as his head turned away from the human in front of him.

“Aren’t you working?” Flowey deadpanned, though looking notably unsurprised. He probably just felt the need to say it when no one else would.

“and now i’m not.”

“When was that decided?!” 

“just now, obviously.” 

The exchange was undeniably familiar to the banter Sans and Flowey sometimes shared, so he couldn’t help but laugh quietly even as he moved to stand next to Red, seemingly waiting.

“since you’ve oh so graciously received some time off just now, who would i be to deny the offer?” Sans agreed easily. He was pretty hungry, anyways, and it’d be nice to enjoy some familiar food before continuing his journey. Perhaps he could…take a break, stay for a few days, get his head back in order after everything that had happened. But…Sans felt that if he stopped for too long—let himself just stop and think—he’d just never start again.

He had to keep going now, or else he’d stay here forever.

“so, are we going?” He asked, tapping his foot on the ground in mock impatience.

“sure sure, there’s a shortcut just over here.”

His grin quirked up slightly before he corrected it. “well then, lead the way.”

Sure enough, Red pulled him through a shortcut in the exact same way he had once upon a time. It was odd, the simultaneous twinge of familiarity in his soul from two different perspectives. It was odd, but it was also deeply uncomfortable, so he did his best to ignore it completely.

Once again they ended up at the strange green tinted version of Grillby’s, and once again Sans was made to appreciate the wonders of warmth. He had somewhat gotten used to cold temperatures in his human body by now, but it was still such a relief to be out of the cold and instead indulge in this sleepy sort of warmth.

Again, Sans was directed to those same two seats, and this time Sans didn’t make the mistake of almost sitting in the wrong one. How nice.

This time Sans made sure he got a burger instead of fries. He may as well try something new, right? He also remembered his gloves ahead of time and safely stored them in his inventory.

“so, my brother, right? he’s pretty badass, huh.”

Sans’ grin turned into something just a bit more genuine, reflecting Red’s own expression. “oh yeah, real cool. only a true badass could fight in boots like those.” Those boots in question were quite the statement; Papyrus must have practiced quite a lot to be able to fight and walk around in them, especially while in the snow and other uneven terrain common down here.

Red glanced upwards as if recalling several amusing memories and snickered.

“hell yeah. he kind of mostly did it to copy undyne though. he also kinda wants to become the captain of the royal guard, heh, don’t tell him that means he’d have to put undyne out of a job.”

Sans raised a brow, imagining an Undyne who wore tall, red, high heeled boots. It was…an interesting image. She could probably kill someone with the heel alone if she wasn’t careful.

“hm, i’ve heard that name before.” He hummed, pretending as if he didn’t know exactly who Red was talking about but unsure if it was successful because it was just too amusing. Oh well, he could always just cite Flowey if he ever encountered a problem, which was another reason it was nice to have the little flower around.

Red tapped the table, with a hand that was yet again suddenly holding a glass of alcohol even though Sans had no idea when he had gotten it. Was he stealing it from someone else’s table or something via shortcuts or something?

Ignoring Sans’ distracted expression, Red replied. “yeah, undyne. she’s the captain of the royal guard. she’s strong. she’ll probably end up killing you in waterfall a lot.”

Sans carefully did not react at the mention of a lot. 

“cool, any tips?” He asked jokingly, though he didn’t expect to get any.

“i dunno, avoid pissing her off i guess. but you not fighting will probably do that anyways.”

Sans blinked, that was actually more than he expected. Flowey seemed a little surprised too.

“i honestly didn’t expect to get anything, huh.” He mused. It wasn't really anything much, but it was something. Red smirked at him, but his eye held something introspective.

“eh. well, you did help my bro out.”

Again, kind of unexpected. Sparing Sans will honestly only really bring Papyrus trouble, so he wasn’t sure what Red was referring to.

“uh…” 

The skeleton fixed an eye on him, clinking a boney finger against the glass in his hand. 

“before you showed up, papyrus…had kind of been in a slump. lost sight of what he wanted after coping in this shithole for so long.” His gaze was just a little wistful, looking into the distance, after a moment it turned back to Sans, strangely serious. “don’t really blame him, but the point is, you reminded him of it.”

“oh.” 

Oops, his chest felt kind of warm and fuzzy…Sans didn’t really uh, help people in that way, or inspire them like…whatsoever. It was weird and sort of uncomfortable, but kind of nice in a way. He had technically been trying to do that throughout his journey so far, but this was Papyrus. That made a difference. A big one. Plus it was weird when someone said it so straightforwardly.

“you’re…welcome i guess?” He probably shouldn’t sound so unsure, helping out Papyrus was definitely a good thing, Sans just had a hard time believing that he had been the one to do it.

“heh, i guess you’re kind of a cool dude, or whatever.” Red's eye rolled.

Sans blanched facetiously—no way.

“uh yeah, no way. papyrus is like,” he pretended to count on his fingers, going up to ten, back down a couple, and then one more, “about a billion times cooler than me, it’s not even a contest. i don’t deserve the title.” He closed his eyes and crossed his arms, shaking his head sagely.

Though it was because he closed his eyes that he was unable to dodge the sharp phalange suddenly poking his cheek, which was very squishy.

“heh, you’re probably right. what about cute then?” The cheeky skeleton smirked. Sans’ eyes blinked open in blatant surprise, but Flowey piped up before he could respond, nodding his little flower head as if Red had just said something very reasonable.

“That’s true.”

Despite his internal (if bemused) amusement, Sans fixed Flowey with a betrayed glare. 

“wuh—huh?? that doesn’t make any sense.” he interjected.

However, Red just quirked a boney brow at him, not even that cheekily, as if he was the one saying something blatantly wrong.

“uh, yeah, it kinda does.” Flowey, the little traitor, just nodded along. Ugh. Was he actually considered cute now? He supposed big round eyes and a round face ended up being kind of cute when translated onto a human face, but Sans still hadn’t been able to get a terribly clear look at himself. Maybe he should have found an opportunity to use Toriel’s mirror. (He hadn’t even looked at that area of the house, but somehow he remembered that she had one).

Sans ended up just sighing in defeat a little dramatically. This is clearly a battle he was not winning.

But when their burgers came, Sans immediately stopped bothering to arguing his case in favor of eating. He was hungry, plus every new meal was a whole new experience; he had to focus up.

The burger was, of course, extremely delicious. Wonderfully greasy, just how he liked it, and with plenty of ketchup. It was almost too big for him to eat though, and it kind of made a mess. He ended up storing half of it in his inventory.

Once they were finished, Red finally spoke up again. (though he mostly hadn’t said anything because he knew Sans would not respond). 

“anyways, you’re gonna head to waterfall, is that right?”

Sans glanced at Flowey and nodded. “yup.” 

“hm…” 

Sans patiently waited for Red to speak again. When he did, he pierced Sans with a seemingly nonchalant stare.

“listen. you may have helped papyrus out a little, but papyrus is still really putting his neck out for you by doing what he did.” Red narrowed his eyes, his red eye glowing a little brighter in the dim light of the bar, basically subtly threatening him. “i dunno how that’ll go down with undyne, but if you wanna pay him back for sparing your life, then keep an eye out for him, capiche?”

Flowey glared at Red for the implied threat, but Sans just narrowed his eyes right back at the skeleton, giving him a completely and utterly undisturbed grin. 

“did you even have to ask?” With Sans in the driver’s seat of this timeline, he’d rather reset than allow anything bad to happen to Papyrus. It wasn’t even a question.

If there was one thing he and Red were truly united on, it was Papyrus’ happiness and safety. And unlike Red, Sans had the power to ensure that desired reality. He wouldn’t accept anything less.

The skeleton stared at him with an indecipherable expression that Sans wasn’t entirely sure how to read, it only went away when he finally raised a questioning brow in return.

“heh…alright then, you seem pretty determined i guess so i won’t worry.” 

Sans hoped Red didn’t see the brief startled freeze his body went through at that statement—Who was he kidding, he totally did, but Sans was going to decide to ignore that little piece of knowledge.

At that moment, there was a sound of someone hurriedly coming through the door behind them that snapped Sans out of his thoughts, and he turned around.

“S-sorry I’m late…!” The blue, nearing on purple bunny hissed quietly, shoulders hunched anxiously with a similarly anxious grin on his face. It seemed he was addressing Grillby.

When the monster made his way to the counter to face a slightly annoyed looking Grillby, Sans finally remembered who this guy was. It was the nicecream guy. But uh, it seemed like he was now working for Grillby. Sans supposed that wasn’t too odd, given his little cart was completely totaled down at the bottom of a cliff. He wondered what a rude version of nicecream would be called—meancream? That sounded kind of funny.

“I-I really am sorry, there was this crazy thing and I heard there was a hu—” His voice cut off while his shoulders hunched even more when Grillby’s blaze burned a little hotter, clearly irritated about getting nothing but excuses. There was a couple of tense seconds there, but in the end though he just waved the monster off, which probably meant for him to just get to work instead of blabbering.

“Right! Right…” The ice cream guy quickly went behind the back and put on an apron that apparently more or less served as an acceptable uniform. Sans got the feeling this didn’t pay much, but a job was a job. Alright then.

“hey, what’s up?” Both Flowey and Red turned to him in surprise when Sans casually began a random conversation with a similarly random monster. Though, they weren’t nearly as surprised as the monster in question.

“H-huh?! Uh? Are you talking to me??” He jumped, nearly dropping a glass he was drying (much to the ire of Grillby in the background), and pointing to himself.

“yup, what’s your name?” 

“Uh…Harold?” 

“cool.” Sans grinned, amused at the way the kid (or probably young adult, actually) squirmed under his honestly friendly chatting, as well as the way other patrons looked at him weird.

“would you happen to be the…uh, previous owner of an ice cream stand that may or may not be at the bottom of a cliff?” 

Harold slumped, looking quite put down. “Yes…um, h-how did you know?”

“flowey told me.” Sans excused with an innocent face. Flowey hadn’t actually told him anything about who the owner of the ice cream stand was, but no one really had to know that (except the flower himself).

The bunny glanced down at the exasperated flower in his lap and then back up to his face. Sans’ statement didn’t really tell him much given he apparently didn’t know who Flowey even was.

“Oh…ok. Uh, why do you ask?”

Sans tilted his head. “well, i kinda wanted some ice cream.”

“Ugh—seriously?? I told you it was a bad idea to eat ice cream in Snowdin!” Flowey instantly protested, gobsmacked at Sans’ persistence in the pursuit of frozen sugar.

“we’re at grillby’s, it’s fine.” He insisted, grinning widely all the while.

Meanwhile, Harold looked…floored, having been speechless all that time.

“You…you want my nicecream??” 

Oh, so it was actually still called nicecream? Perhaps that was why his cart got destroyed, as sad as that sounded.

“yup.” He nodded.

Harold was absolutely stunned, it was honestly kinda hilarious.

“two nicecreams please?” Sans tried, holding out his hand. That seemed to finally spur the monster into action, and he quickly scrambled to grab some out of his inventory. Sans was slightly surprised that he actually indeed had ice cream on hand, but all the better.

“U-um! That’s…that’ll be…”

“maybe like 30 g?” 

Harold flushed, nodding rapidly. “Y-yes!” He was so nervous and excited that he didn’t even really think that hard about Sans “guessing” the correct price for two nicecreams.

“heh. thanks pal. i was really wanting to try some after i saw your cart.”

“I-I’m so glad! Thank you!” He put his hands together happily. “Um…no one really…um no one really appreciated them before…too cheesy.” 

Sans glanced at Red as he rolled his eyes. “no one cares for that kinda saccharine shit down here man, it’s irritating.”

Harold hunched into himself. “Right…”

Sans sighed quietly, mulling on that as he pulled the ice cream out of its wrapping. It was quite warm here so it’ll probably melt pretty fast. Monsters down here didn’t care for that sappy stuff, huh? That sounded almost opposite to what he was used to. But it seemed like down here every one had their barriers up, and that sort of genuine niceness might be like a condescending slap in the face considering their circumstances. It was less like trying to make jokes about their poor conditions, and more like putting a crappy bandaid on a gaping wound. Pointless and irritating, not to mention naive—oh god this was delicious.

He put a hand to his cheek in delight, and he pointedly ignored the chuckles coming from his right.

It was sweet and creamy and went down into his chest with a lingering cold that only fully disappeared until it either entered his stomach or fizzled out into magical energy. But also…like much monster food, it was full of intentions. Lots of the time these weren’t too significant, and didn’t make a large impact unless the creator purposely or accidentally willed it so, but they were always there.

But for this nicecream, he could feel Harold’s genuine feelings infused into this simple bar of ice cream, fragile bits and pieces of kindness and hope for the future, combined with the monster’s shaky ambitions that really did warm your heart.

He hadn’t really thought about it, since most of the food down here had muted feelings and low healing numbers and it had therefore slipped under his radar, but he remembered then that good food filled with hope and happiness was absolutely integral to a monster’s wellbeing.

Sans put a finger to his mouth, thinking. “well…i can see why some monsters might find it kind of annoying,” he acknowledged, only just now responding to Red’s statement that had gone unaddressed by him several minutes ago, making eyes turn to him.

“but like, this ice cream is amazing. and i think it’s a really good idea to make encouraging sweet treats.” He tsked in reluctant amusement at the line written on the stick: “You look cute today!”

He looked back up at the wide eyed bunny. “but uh, maybe you can try not advertising it right away. gotta get people’s foot in the door, right? no matter how nasty someone is, they’re still gonna want ice cream, so you can just get em’ with the kindness sneak attack.” 

His grin softened into something a little more genuine. “i think just your feelings are enough.” He said, silently referencing the dedication and care he could sense from the simple bar of ice cream without saying it out loud, and considering the little emotional gasp Harold released, he was pretty sure he got what Sans was saying.

“I…T-thank you!! You’re right…I’m…I’m going to try again!” And just like that, the bunny’s once anxious smile was turned into a dazzling grin.

“heh, glad to hear it. i’d be pretty disappointed if i couldn’t get more of these.” he waved around the empty stick, resisting the urge to pull the second one out from his inventory.

Eventually Harold left to go attend to some other patrons with an extra spring in his step that could only come about with a sufficient amount of hope.

“...you’re weird.” Red was, once again, staring at him with an inscrutable expression. For some reason Sans got the weird feeling that Flowey would be looking at him the same way had he not already spent so much time with Sans already.

“guess so. that’s pretty normal though, isn’t it?” He grinned.

“no, it’s really not.” Red disagreed plainly. Sans just shrugged.

“oh well then.” He ended up snickering to himself internally when he recalled Red saying the exact same thing last time they were here.

“i think i hate you.” Red remarked passionlessly, but it was an obvious lie (to Sans).

“aw thanks.” Sans stuck his tongue out at the skeleton, mostly because he could now and it was a novelty, all while pulling his gloves back on. He then hopped off the stool with Flowey in hand.

“welp, i better head off. places to go, people to see—eh, you know how it is.” 

“hey, you think i’m payin for this?”

“consider it my protection fee.” Red’s face twisted into a delightfully displeased expression as if he had bitten into something strange; he couldn’t exactly say anything back considering his subtle threats and the fact that Sans had literally paid off his tab yesterday.

Sans didn’t bother waiting for him to think of something to say and walked towards the exit, giving a friendly wave to Harold, the dogs, and the drunk bunny who had reached towards him but missed.

He gave the annoyed Red a wink before walking out the door.

Sans had briefly considered walking through a shortcut as well as the door, but he better not. The unique twist of magic of a shortcut was easy to identify if you knew what you were looking for. He’d put enough holes in his weird identity already, no need to give the skeleton more ammo. He’d just have to walk farther away. And so he began the trek towards the Waterfall entrance.

“...you know, you don’t talk much with other people around.” Sans noticed.

Flowey made a face. “Eugh…I don’t really like talking to most monsters.” He was truthful enough; there was probably more to it, but he didn’t elaborate.

“awww so you like talkin’ to me?” He cooed, watching Flowey’s face light up with an offended blush.

“Wuh-?! That’s…! Ugh, it’s...better than most monsters I guess…” His voice got increasingly small and hard to make out as he went on.

“heh. i’m flattered, really. what’s wrong with other monsters though?” 

Flowey gave him a deadpan stare, and Sans chuckled and quickly elaborated. “ok. aside from the obvious.”

The flower sighed and then frowned. “I don’t know…it’s just…boring.” His face scrunched up in distaste, seemingly at his own choice of words. “Awkward.” He corrected.

“huh.” 

Sans wondered if Flowey had killed others in the past here too. Despite how nice he was now. Though, nice wasn’t exactly the correct word here. He wasn’t really nice, but more so…tired. And kinda protective…well, he actually was sort of nicer then some monsters here—still.

“well, that’s fine. i don’t mind chattin’ for you instead.”

Flowey rolled his eyes, weird mood being dispelled along with it. “Yes yes, I’m sure you can.”

It didn’t take them very long at all to get right back to where they were before they’d taken a shortcut to Grillby’s. Predictably, Red was sitting right there, smirking at him. Yes yes very weird, Sans already knew all the tricks in the playbook though, given he’d wrote the damn thing.

He just gave an enthusiastic wave, amusing himself with Red’s subsequent disgruntled expression. Ah, shoving friendliness into grumpy monster’s faces would probably never get old.

Sans looked around. The caverns were damp and dull, and as he went, it felt like they got increasingly claustrophobic. Not to mention the lighting was terrible. Uh, that might just be the human eyes though. Not really suited to the dark.

He took a deep breath; time to travel through Waterfall, and with it, an extremely murderous Undyne. Hurray.

Chapter Text

At the very least, Sans wasn’t immediately jumped the instant he stepped foot into Waterfall. There was that annoying river waterfall combo that you had to trek over though, and if not for shortcuts, it’d be just as bad.

Sans was about to take one when he had an unexpected flash of memory while glancing over at the waterfall. Right…there was a space behind there. Normally he might not bother, but since he was already gathering quite the collection of what seemed to be human items, he really ought to grab it. Call it his human duty.

He sighed and set Flowey down so he could pull off his slippers and socks yet again (though at least this time he wasn’t freezing).

“Uh, what the heck are you doing? Aren’t you just going to teleport?”

Sans stuffed the socks in his pocket, rolling his eyes.

“hey hey pal, i don’t even know what that is.”

A deadpan stare. “Shortcuts.” And a correction that was ground out more than it was said.

“oh yeah.” Sans tested how far he could step into it. It didn’t even reach his shorts though, so no worries. The water did feel interesting against his skin though. “about that. i want to look behind the waterfall. i could try and shortcut in, but eh, it’s better this way.” It was true, he probably could, considering it was relatively easy to estimate the distance here and also because of his weird not-memories. But uh, it was pretty important to get it right, so if he wasn’t 100% sure it was really just better to do it himself, as sacrilegious as that seemed.

Flowey narrowed his eyes at him. “You know, how do those shortcuts work? You’ll tell your old pal Flowey right? Right?” The little flower’s eyes sparkled with faux innocence, adorning a smile that both fit him and also didn’t at all. But of course, Sans just snorted and raised a brow at him silently.

...

“...UGH. Fine fine, whatever; don’t tell me!” Flowey probably hadn’t expected much anyways.

Sans chuckled and then finally trudged towards the waterfall, somehow managing to completely avoid all the rocks rushing past (which would actually just propel you off the cliff, rather than push you into a bridge, guess safety precautions were even less popular here) before he took a tiny shortcut just to avoid soaking himself in the waterfall as he passed through.

Inside was a dark and crowded cavern, and if he hadn’t been so short, he probably would have to crouch down. Being tiny really did have its benefits.

Ugh, that being said, it was actually really humid and hard to breathe in here? Which was an awfully foreign problem for a guy who only recently gained lungs. He just quickly grabbed the item and took a shortcut back out.

Unsurprisingly now, Flowey froze in his pot at the sight of it, though it was less pronounced. His eyes glazed over a little for a moment, but he still shook his head to clear it.

“Uh, a tutu…are you going to wear that?” 

Sans looked down at what he was holding. Oh right. It was a tutu. He choked out a startled laugh when he imagined himself wearing it. Ah yeah, he didn’t have anything against cute tutus, but he wasn’t going to be wearing it.

He shook his head, grin still pulling up at the edges in amusement. “nah. i really just wanted to grab it, ya know?”

He turned his eyes to the tutu, studying the frays and rips, as well as the sparkling dust caking the fabric. The magic in it was gone now, but he could still identify it for what it was: monster dust. Sans sighed, feeling the emotions and traces out memories steeped into the item, granting it its defensive value. Fear, adrenaline, anger, pity; it was all there.

He wondered if Frisk had felt it too… Well, probably not: without magic to connect their body to their soul, humans weren’t much affected by such things. Food was included in this, but less so since it could affect their soul directly.

At that moment he had a thought that perhaps because Flowey was soulless, the dark feelings surrounding the Underground didn’t affect him as deeply as everyone else. That could be one factor in why he turned out the way he did.

He shook his head. Well, in the end it was just speculation. Thankfully he had remembered to use a bit of blue magic to remove the water from his legs while he had been spacing out (a casually impressive feat of control that he barely thought about now), so he put on his socks and slippers again.

Sans’ inventory was also really beginning to look a little full, so he dropped a few things off in the dimensional box before finally picking Flowey back up and shortcutting across the river.

It didn’t take long for Sans to feel the magical presence of what he knew to be alternate Papyrus, alongside what he thought was probably Undyne. Her presence was…immense…to put it lightly. Potent magic honed with deadly precision and ruthlessness. It was similar to his Undyne in a way , but it never made him tense like it does now. There was also…a weaker presence in the bushes?

Well, he’d have to go through them anyways, and hopefully he wouldn’t alert anyone as long as he went slowly and didn’t make any noise, which he was pretty good at.

Technically he was short enough that his head didn’t peak over the very tall grass…but his goggles did. Slightly. What an unexpected betrayal…and so he was forced to crouch down a little, carefully brushing past the grass without a sound. If he spread out some blue magic just a bit, he could slow down the air itself, thereby muting the sound it made. Blue magic fundamentally was meant to keep things still, after all. Pretty nifty, though he mostly just used it for convenience or pranks. This was one of the rare serious uses.

He stopped moving when he heard voices over the other side of the cliff, echoing against the close cavern walls. He was unfortunately unable to pick up on Undyne’s voice; Papyrus was just much louder than her, so he was only able to catch his side of the conversation.

“MY APOLOGIES CAPTAIN UNDYNE, I WAS…UNFORTUNATELY UNABLE TO KILL THE HUMAN, THEY WERE…UNEXPECTEDLY RESILIENT.”

Papyrus sounded really professional talking like that. He was pretty sure he and Undyne were friends here too, but they clearly knew how to be serious for business. 

Sans heard what might have been a tsk of frustration. 

“HOWEVER, NO RESIDENTS WERE HARMED; THERE ARE NO CASUALTIES.”

There was a pause.

“I…YES, THE HUMAN DID NOT HARM ANYONE, BUT THEY WERE ALSO ABLE TO ESCAPE MOST ENCOUNTERS.”

Something that sounded like disbelief and disgust.

“THEY…I KNOW IT SOUNDS HARD TO BELIEVE, BUT THEY REALLY DID NOT WANT TO FIGHT. THEY WERE CAPABLE ENOUGH TO PREVAIL DESPITE THAT; THEY ARE STRONG.”

It seemed like Undyne disagreed in some way. Papyrus took a deep breath.

“UNDYNE…” After that, his voice became more firm. “UNDYNE. I DON’T BELIEVE IT’S RIGHT TO KILL SOMEONE WHO DOES NO HARM, THEY’VE PROVEN THEM-”

He’s cut off by Undyne’s sharp statement.

“W-WHAT?! NO! I HAVE NOT BEEN… CORRUPTED BY HUMAN WILE! I AM NOT THAT GULLIBLE, YOU KNOW THAT!”

Undyne seemed like she was arguing.

“I…I UNDERSTAND. I KNOW I AM OUT OF PLACE, AND THAT YOU WILL NOT CHANGE YOUR MIND…IT IS YOUR DUTY AFTER ALL. BUT I…”

She said something cold.

“...THEN SO BE IT. I’M SORRY, UNDYNE.”

Sans felt himself let out a little breath. Wow, Papyrus really was defending him, and not without struggle. It hadn’t quite sunk in yet that Papyrus really did value his experience with Sans, but it kind of was now. Sans reminding him of his ambitions had a big impact. What would this mean for Papyrus? He wasn’t really entirely sure what had gone down given he had only been able to hear the singular side of this particular conversation, but still.

He was pretty sure Papyrus left at some point, but Sans was knocked out of his thoughts by a rustle of grass next to him. It was that other presence, pretty weak, but still—

“He-yah! ”

Sans was abruptly tackled by a yellow and orange figure, it hurt a little but it mostly just knocked the wind out of him. He didn’t get much time to think about it though when he felt the sharp coalescing of deadly magic above them.

He pushed Flowey away with a burst of blue magic before doing a small tackle of his own, rolling over with the other monster, narrowly avoiding the crackling spear that stabbed into the ground next to them in almost the same moment.

Oh.

Ok.

The monster only took a moment of stunned blinking before they resumed trying to…what? Attack Sans? It was mostly just annoying so aside from dulling their movements with some weighty blue magic, he ignored it in favor of staring up at the armored figure looming above.

“Hnnngh , I gottem’ pinned down Undyne! Ha —Go for it!”

He heard Flowey let out a strangled, anxious groan at the situation, but didn’t say anything unnecessary. 

Of course, if she did do as they suggested, she’d probably end up skewering the kid apparently trying to help her, but uh, they didn’t really think it through that far. Clearly.

Sans locked eyes with her through the mask. They really looked like they were trying to pierce through his soul, but he just stared back evenly.

After quite a few long seconds of tension, she ended up slapping a frustrated hand to her armored face before stomping off in the opposite direction. She probably figured trying to kill him right now wasn’t worth the hassle or risk. Perhaps she would have felt differently had he actually been dangerous, but Papyrus had obviously emphasized that he was harmless, and therefore probably wouldn’t murder the kid that was currently still trying to murder him (although ineffectually).

“well, that happened.”

“You! Kid! Would you quit it already?!” Was Flowey’s eventual interjection, eyes blackened and harsh as he reached out a vine to dislodge his would be attacker. The kid tumbled through the grass and dirt, but wiggled right back up to them, though they did refrain from attacking Sans again, thankfully.

“you mean kid it, right?”

He only got an irritated shove from the retreating vine.

“You could have done that yourself.”

Sans shrugged, opening his mouth to say something before he was interrupted.

“I can’t believe she let you get away! Ugh, I knew it —I gotta take matters into my own hands! They’ll probably beg me to be in the royal guard!”

Sans glanced at the kid, noting that they were, ironically, handless. He recognized them now that he actually had room to think: it was that monster kid that had somewhat recently moved into Snowdin from Hotland.

They managed to stand up, glaring at him with eyes that were both weary and childish at the same time.

“I’m gonna kill you and become strong, just you wait human!”

And with that, they ran off, though not without tripping face flat into the floor first.

“huh. two would be assassins? just for me? wow, i’m popular.”

“Would you take this a little more seriously, you totally almost just died!” Flowey poked him with a sharp vine.

“i noticed.” He huffed, perhaps a tad more snarky than he meant to. Man, his heart was beating so fast, and he’d barely done anything. Was that normal? He’d read the phrase “heart beating” before in human books, but he didn’t think he’d ever actually experience it like he had been lately. It really wasn’t just a fancy turn of phrase.

He shook his head and crouched down next to Flowey’s pot, which was knocked onto its side, with a very disgruntled looking Flowey uncomfortably horizontal.

“whoops, sorry.”

He righted the pot and filled it back in with the spilt dirt. The flower sighed.

“I really don’t care.” 

“heh, better than dyin.”

A scoff. “Right.”

…

“well. nothin’ left to do but keep goin.” He finally said, picking up Flowey’s pot before wading through the rest of the grass in the way. Ahead of him, a save point caught his eye with it’s otherworldly shine, drawing him towards it in the way only it could.

Right, so Undyne was pretty murder-y, he already knew that, but it was certainly…er, nice to get a reminder. If he wanted to keep this no deaths thing up, he was gonna have to stay sharp. It sounded exhausting already but…

He put out his hand and Saved.

…but there was no other way; he was going to do it no matter what.

Sans let out a breath and finally walked past it, looking at the bridge seeds ahead instead. They looked kind of wilted though, and honestly he didn’t really trust them to actually support his weight. Well, that was sort of besides the point given he probably wouldn’t have used them anyways, but it was the principle of the matter.

He walked forward and in the next step he was on the other side. Annnnnd of course he ended up getting jumped by Aaron almost immediately afterwards, muscles bulging to the edge of bursting. It was honestly kind of way too much.

“Hey cutie, like my muscles? Don’t bother answering I know you do >;)” Classic Aaron, but somehow even creepier. He was forced to look at said muscles by having them dangerously shoved into his face, which he quickly dodged with an urgency unseen anywhere else. Like, they were sweaty . And that sweat turned into magical bullets . 

There certainly were all sorts of characters in the Underground. He knew that, but it really seemed like they were even more… colourful in this version of it. Um, well, Aaron really wasn't that different though.

“ugh.” Sans groaned quietly. It was a bit unlike him, but he was still a little wound up from what had just previously happened, so give him a break.

Let’s see, what had Frisk done last time, flex? Oh yeah, now that’d be something. May as well give it a try.

“...”

“OH GOD…TOO PATHETIC! ARE YOU EVEN TRYING?! >;)”

“hey pal, i’m doin’ my best here.” He really wasn’t. Not that there was even anything to flex in the first place.

“You really are scrawny, huh.” Thanks for the input, Flowey.

“Just stand there and watch, baby! >;)”

Sans really didn’t want to; it was hard to. So, instead he just covered his eyes as the mer-monster flexed so hard and so intensely he uh…passed out.

Fight won? Cool. Aaron was flopped onto the rock floor, muscles comically deflated and droopy.

“Haha…” His shoulders slumped, and all of the leftover tension from his encounter with Undyne finally left him. It was odd to feel that way right after a battle, but still. He did.

“That guy is so weird…uh, you good?”

Sans reaffirmed his grip on the pot, grinning tiredly but genuine enough. “yeah, i’m good.”

Alright, he wouldn’t get anywhere if he got tired at the first step. So he’d just have to embrace the dangerous life. Woohoo.

Just then, his phone began to ring. And of course, he picked it up.

“HELLO? THIS IS PAPYRUS.”

“hey, what’s up?”

“NOTHING MUCH…WELL I DID GET FIRED FROM MY JOB BUT YOU DON’T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT THAT!” 

Uh, no that sounded like something he should worry about. Well, sort of. The royal guard was kinda about killing humans mostly and that was pretty bad, so it was a good thing sort of. But…

“uh. are you sure?”

“SURE I’M SURE!!” Papyrus insisted. Well, he sounded fine enough. Papyrus didn’t lose heart easily if he believed in what he was doing. But he was still probably upset about it.

“ANYWAYS…I CALLED YOU TO LET YOU KNOW THAT…I WASN’T ABLE TO CONVINCE UNDYNE NOT TO KILL YOU.” He sounded regretful, but not very surprised.

“eh, don’t worry about it. you’ve helped me enough.” 

“HM, THAT IS PROBABLY TRUE.”

Sans snorted.

“I’M SURE YOU’LL SURVIVE, AND AFTER THAT WE CAN CONVINCE HER OF YOUR WEAKLING TYPE STRENGTH!!”

“heh, sounds like a plan, man.”

“EXCELLENT! ALSO! I DEFINITELY DID NOT FIND THIS NUMBER BY CALLING EVERY NUMBER SEQUENTIALLY UNTIL I GOT YOURS, GOT IT?!”

“yep, you definitely didn’t do that.” 

“EXACTLY!”

Papyrus hung up.

Talking to Papyrus made him feel a little more motivated, even if it wasn’t his brother, and even if the news wasn't particularly bad nor good. Sans had figured that Papyrus had been unsuccessful already, and he hadn’t expected much anyways. He’d been surprised Papyrus had even tried and hadn’t yielded to Undyne in the end. Anyways, time to move on.

He completely skipped the rest of the bridge seed things, effortlessly and seamlessly dodging any potential deadliness that they might have posed, and instead stepped into the wishing room.

The walls were uneven and sometimes a little too close, but it looked surprisingly similar to how he remembered it. The twinkling stones above consumed his vision, superimposed against memories of the real deal that he had seen every so often. They weren’t the real stars; and he had used to bitterly lament this fact to no one but himself. But, after all this time, he thought they were beautiful in their own unique way. Representing the hopes and desires of monsters trapped Underground for centuries, wishing upon stars that they could only imagine. But the ones they were looking at were plenty real, even if they weren’t what they wanted.

Eh, he was really getting too philosophical. The point was: he liked them.

He walked past whispering echo flowers, quietly speaking, as if afraid of being overheard even when they continued to say it over and over.

“I wish I could see the real stars.”

“My mom was killed, I wish she was back.”

“I obtained LOVE today. It’s supposed to be a good thing, but I’m scared. It feels weird.”

“I can’t trust anything but the stars here.”

He liked the wistful and heartbreaking words of days past a lot less than the sparkling stones.

Sans sighed before unveiling the hidden door that he already unconsciously knew was there, almost as if escaping from that dreary room.

“that room’s depressing.” He said simply.

“Yeah.” Was the flower’s only response. What more was there to even be said?

Outside was the deck surrounded by a veritable field of water sausages, as well as the plaques containing the unfortunate history of monsters, though they were a little more scuffed up than usual. He scanned through them just to see if it was any different, but it didn’t seem to be. Interesting. He didn’t have a perfect memory of what they originally said, but nothing stood out.

Flowey stared at the final plaque with a strange expression.

He eventually continued on, walking slowly as a foreboding feeling begun to eat at him with every step. There was a memory that was nagging at him, it was—

WHAM

Right. That. There was a glowing spear volatile with murderous intent stabbing into the dock just ahead of where Sans was standing.

“Run! ”

He didn’t need to be told twice. Tightening his grip on Flowey’s pot, Sans surreptitiously turned his own soul blue, lightening his body and hopefully making it easier to run (and to cheat and boost himself forward without seeming too obvious). If only he had remembered to skip past this room; he usually avoided doing uncertain shortcuts, but this certainly would have been an ideal time.

Super charged spears whizzed past him with a fury only Undyne could put out, but with now incredibly light feet he ran right past them, ducking his head and swerving his body every so often if need be, though he had to be careful to not put Flowey in harm's way or drop him.

Stray spears thunked into the path in front of him even as he ran, and the deck—really quite worn now that he was looking closely—suddenly splintered and fell apart, creating a sizable gap between his side and the other. Flowey squeaked in alarm, but Sans merely sucked in a short breath and prepared to take a leap. Sans couldn’t really jump that well, but with blue magic he could cheat it well enough.

Okay, well he almost misjudged the landing, but it was fine because he didn’t .

Flowey released a stressed moan, but otherwise tried to keep quiet to allow Sans to keep his concentration.

He was close; he could see the land the deck was connected to and the tall grass that came with it. Sans was so tempted to just shortcut into the grass, but he really didn’t want to in front of Undyne.

There was the sound coming from his left, a spear he hadn’t noticed after his very brief distraction from seeing the end. He knew he couldn’t dodge it without having seen it beforehand. Ao instead—by nearly pure instinct—Sans hurriedly raised his free hand and deflected it with a burst of raw magic, tinted blue and had he more time it probably would have captured the spear in its grasp. As it was, he was only able to violently knock it off course, cracking with destabilized magic and instantly flinging itself into a wall.

That was…not good. But he didn’t have any time to think much more about it before he heard the sound of Undyne preparing to leap onto the platform, motivating him to dash into the grass. 

Once he was out of sight he concentrated on the space beyond it. It was easy to picture, considering he had been there plenty of times before and…there was a save point in that room. He remembered that: somehow the memory of it was so clear.

He took the shortcut, calm and confident about it despite his heart once again pounding in his ears. Sans even had to briefly take into account the fact that his counterpart wasn’t far, and to make sure he was out of range of his senses, or really just enough that the subtle twist of a shortcut was completely overridden by Undyne’s oppressive magic still crowding the cavern walls and putting everyone in its vicinity on edge. He had scarcely realized magic could feel so distinctly dangerous and…untrustworthy.

His eyes opened, and Flowey released a breath that was wrangled into silence. They were in the room where a crystal trapped a piece of cheese in its grasp. It was such an ordinary (to him) and amusing landmark that it calmed him somewhat. Not that his nervousness really showed clearly on his normally passive face, but it would surely be wearing on the edges had he been able to see it.

Sans learned his back against the rocky wall and listened down the hall. Hoping Undyne wouldn’t look down this way. She probably wouldn’t, but he really shouldn’t jinx it.

He could hear her stomping around in the grass in her armor, and the squishy sound of her grabbing what he assumed was that monster kid by the face. He could hear them shout and struggle, but the noise gradually got quieter and quieter until it eventually descended into silence, with only the sound of dripping water left over.

“...” “...”

He sunk to the floor, finally allowing his heavy breathing to be as loud as he wanted.

“that was…interesting.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t get killed.”

“heh. same.” 

His eyes drifted for a moment.

“Oh no you don’t ; I know that look! We can’t take a nap right now, idiot!”

Sans rolled his eyes in amusement, but the motion was lethargic as the adrenaline wore away and left his body heavy, not to mention the blue magic that he had released now that it was no longer necessary.

“sheeesh, i wasn’t going to…i was just thinking about it. nothin’ wrong with that.”

“Right… ”

“huh. somehow i’m gettin’ the sense that you don’t believe me.” 

Flowey did not dignify him with a response.

“Anyways...you used magic…is that okay?” Flowey had naturally noticed given he was so close. Undyne had surely noticed too. Perhaps he could spin it into something else if he took some time to think about it, but he probably shouldn’t hedge his bets on that.

“i dunno.” He shrugged, pretending it didn’t make him as anxious as it kinda did. “i don’t think anyone else saw though.” Alphys didn’t have any cameras in that particular spot, which was pretty lucky.

Flowey thought on that too, likely also aware of said cameras. “No, probably not.”

“...guess i’ll just have to settle for that. i’m not reloading.” He said with casual finality. Just because he could doesn’t mean he should start using it at his convenience. That was a bad habit to build. Not to mention it’d leave the nasty taste of hypocrisy in his mouth. No way.

“...Alright.” Flowey eventually agreed with some hesitance.

“anyway. i won’t lie, it’s pretty tough to carry you like that.” Normally it wasn’t an issue, but in tense situations…

Flowey cringed and wilted a little. “Ugh. Yeah…sorry. I...I could…” His voice trailed off before he shut it.

Sans raised an eyebrow. “you could…?”

The flower’s mouth opened and closed, before he finally said. “I could extend my stem to wrap around your body instead, but that’s—”

“sure, why not.” Sans cut off, shrugging.

“Bwuh?!"  The Flower made a funny noise. " I could like, easily kill you like that!” Flowey sputtered, protesting against his own idea.

That was probably true. “eh, it’s fine. i trust you. s’not like it’d work even if you did, heh.” He’d just come back anyways. He didn’t really think Flowey would do that, though.

If Flowey had resembled a gobsmacked fish before, it was nothing on his current expression. A Flish, if you will.

“I …you trust me?” 

“uh…yeah?” Was that really so surprising? Sans could be a little distrustful sometimes, but he didn’t try to be. And not to toot his own horn, but he considered himself a pretty decent judge of character.

“Monsters…monsters don’t trust each other. How do you think we got to this point?” Flowey said, as if he was repeating a mantra or a common fact. Monsters don’t trust each other.

Sans didn’t bother saying something dumb like ‘well i’m not a monster’ because he was . He was human, physically, sure (and had a human SOUL to boot). But he still had the SOUL and experiences of a monster, all packed into his little human body. And that was what mattered.

“okay, well, it’s not like it’s impossible or anything. i think they could eventually.” He stated, confident with the knowledge that this was absolutely true. Even without using the personal evidence of his own universe, he’d seen trust here before. In small and fragile pockets, but it was there. Monsters wanted to trust, they just felt like they couldn’t.

“You… ugh , okay. Whatever.” Flowey conceded, though looking like he didn’t believe Sans at all. Flowey had hesitantly supported a journey without killing anyone, but it seemed like really believing in monsters was still a little beyond him. That was fine. Sans could wait.

He grinned, holding out an arm towards the edge of the flower pot.

“...” The little flower sighed, before finally carefully dislodging himself from the dirt, politefully brushing off what he could before snaking it around Sans’ arm and torso. It felt a little weird, but not that bad. When he was fully released from his potted prison, Flowey’s head settled next to his, as if he was constantly peeking over Sans’ shoulder.

“hm, wish i had a mirror to check this out.”

“I’m not a fashion accessory!”

Ouch, his poor human ears. “keep it down a little pal. you’re kinda in ideal gossiping position right there.”

Sans heard the sound of Flowey snapping his mouth shut. Out of the corner of his eye, his face looked a little embarrassed.

“Right. Sorry.” He grumbled. Sans just laughed. 

After that he moved his arm about to see if anything pulled or felt weird. Flowey quickly made the appropriate adjustments until Sans barely even noticed him. His stem was fairly thick, but he was still just a flower, so he wasn’t particularly heavy—not even for Sans.

“alrighty, we’re ready for trouble. come at me undyne.” It sounded so ridiculous coming out of his mouth, with zero fighting passion in it at all.

“Do not invite that kind of thing, idiot.”

“eh, you’re right. i’ll try and turn em’ away at the door instead.”

Sans chuckled at Flowey’s groan while magicking the lonely pot into his hands (he was tired, okay?...yes he would have still done it even if he wasn’t tired) to put it into his inventory. There was no reason to toss it, it might still come in handy.

He stopped to give a little piece of his leftover burger to the unfortunate mouse and to Save, revitalizing him with a bit of energy along with it. He’d probably take a break soon, but he could keep going for now. He ought to get used to continuing even if he was kind of tired, since he’d really make no progress otherwise.

Sans finally walked out of the little room, immediately making eye contact with his alternate self standing next to a beat up telescope. It looked like it’d been broken and fixed several times.

He tried to gauge the skeleton’s reaction: had he sensed the shortcut? The burst of blue magic? Sans thought not, but even with his face reading abilities it was difficult to get a read on the guy, especially with something so specific, so Sans couldn’t really say for sure.

“huh, fancy meeting you here.” Sans grinned at him.

“interestin’ necklace ya got there.” Red eyed the vines curled around his body, looking a little surprised even if he hid it.

Sans heard Flowey suck in a breath, then ground out “I. Am. Not. A. Fashion accessory.” He probably would have been louder had he not still been right next to Sans’ ear.

“heh, what he said.” He was obligated to defend his flowery friend, even if he also thought it was funny.

“hah. right.” Red said in such a dismal manner that it did nothing but piss Flowey off more, but the flower just glared at him venomously instead.

Sans walked up to the telescope. “anything worth lookin at in here?” He knew there wasn’t, not really.

“why don’t cha take a look?” Red offered, a distinctly nasty twinkle in his eye that was nonetheless amused. “it’s a premium telescope, but i guess i can put it on yer tab.”

He raised a brow, glancing down at the beat up thing. “premium in what sense of the word, exactly?”

“hey, we can’t exactly buy em new like you can your fancy surface. this is a garbage dump exclusive.”

Sans had also found his original telescope at the garbage dump, but he had eventually unbuilt and rebuilt a new one with nicer materials with a bit of input from Alphys. He’d just left it in the house somewhere until Papyrus had asked to give it to Undyne, who was struggling with the puzzles in Waterfall. It seems this Sans never got around to it. Now that he thought of it, he hadn’t really seen that telescope used in any of Undyne’s puzzles yet, either.

“my bad. don’t mean to demean your high quality garbage.” In the Underground high quality garbage was kind of the norm and not much of an insult at all, so Red didn’t appear particularly offended, and he hadn't even meant it as one either.

When Sans bent down to take a closer look at the lens, he noticed it was—predictably—tampered with. At first he thought it was just red paint like usual, but upon further examination it looked kind of different, and had an odd…spicy smell. Sans wasn’t exactly terribly familiar with smells and their various associations yet, but by the power of elimination…

“...is that hot sauce?”

“i dunno, is it?” Red’s cheeky expression was all the answer he really needed.

“that’s pretty nasty work, man.” Kind of funny, but uh, pretty mean. He was pretty sure that was painful to most people’s eyes. Not that he would really know, personally. Getting something stuck in your eye socket was a little different from getting something in your eyeball according to the many monsters who had them.

“i have no idea what you’re talking about.” And yet Red’s deeply amused smirk said otherwise.

“God I hate this guy…” He heard Flowey whisper. He wasn’t even sure he was meant to hear it, he chuckled lightly anyway.

Sans figured there wasn’t much else to be gained from chatting with Red much more, so he just dropped Flowey's pot into the nearby box and waved him bye.

Somehow it still caught the skeleton off guard; hilarious.

Chapter Text

First thing first, Sans immediately swerved into the rough looking doorway to his left, even though it was kind of stuffy. Inside was a small room, and to his delight: Harold. He hadn’t been entirely sure if the guy would actually be there. He didn’t actually have his little cart, but he did have a handwritten sign advertising “Ice cream” in a plain font. It seemed he really was taking Sans’ advice.

“heya pal, fancy seein’ ya here.” He put up a hand.

The bunny monster’s previously bored face immediately lit up at the sight of him.

“Oh! It’s you! So you came to Waterfall huh?”

“yep, doin a full tour.” Sans shrugged, grinning. He eyed the sign, notably bereft of the “nice” moniker.

“you’re takin my idea, huh?”

“Yes! It’s a very good idea; I believe in it for sure!” The monster curled a determined fist, even if he still looked a little nervous.

“heh…good to hear. any luck?” 

Harold laughed sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck. “Um? I feel like I never see anyone here? But! While I was walking I did sell some to a passing monster! I think they really liked it!”

“i suppose they would.” Sans nodded. It was good ice cream, after all. “hm, maybe you should put a sign outside or somethin.”

“...Ah.” 

He heard Flowey groan and roll his eyes.

“R-right… Um!” The bunny quickly changed the topic, embarrassed. 

“But, I was also thinking of bringing business to Hotland! Uh, Sans told me once that ‘aint no one gonna buy fuckin ice cream in snowdin dumbass.’” Huh, he actually copied the voice pretty well; a loud laugh threatened to escape him so he covered his mouth and settled just for grinning like a madman.

“uh, right. that’s probably not a bad idea, in any case.” Sans had recently truly begun to understand the whims and woes of temperature, so he now understood how truly a terrible idea it was to sell ice cream in Snowdin.

“Right! Hopefully I can get a new cart at some point…”

Monsters could store things in their inventory and have them stay fresh, but the size was limited. Not everyone had portable dimensional storage like Alphys developed on her phone. He used to have one on his phone too (courtesy of being pals with the royal scientist), but you couldn't put dimensional storage in dimensional storage, so it wasn't in his inventory when the world went kaput.

“hm, well. in the meantime, can i get a nicecream?” 

Sans hadn’t even eaten the one in his inventory yet, but he had to support poor Harold’s business…plus they were delicious. 

“Of course!” The bunny monster was much more on top of it than last time, and he immediately pulled out a nicecream from his inventory and handed it over to Sans.

“Um, I was thinking of maybe changing the price to uh, 25 G but-”

“no prob.” Sans just shrugged and handed it over. I wasn’t like he was hurtin’ for G or anything.

The guy sagged with relief that his price wasn’t rebuked.

“Thank you, and have a terrific day!” He paused. “Uh, maybe I shouldn’t say that. S-sneak attack, right?” 

“heh. probably. i don’t mind though.”

“R-right heheh…” Harold scratched the back of his neck. “And um, be careful out there! Waterfall’s a little…dangerous. Even though the captain of the royal guard lives here. I hear it’s because the paths are so dark and winding. I’m not sure it’s even all mapped out!”

“i will. you don’t gotta worry about me too much though. I’m sure I’ll end up, heh , under the captain’s jurisdiction where i’m goin. very safe.” 

“If you say so!”

After that pleasant exchange, Sans walked back out of the little cave, passing by a semi-teardrop shaped monster that was looking up blankly at the glittering stones on the ceiling.

“What’s a star? Can you eat it? Can you kill it? Does it give you Love? Did the humans steal them?” It had said.

“well, stars are made of a lot of really hot hydrogen and are super duper far away, so probably none of those things.” He had then replied. The monster looked a little enlightened, but it didn’t say anything back. It scarcely even seemed to realize that Sans was there. Weird. He also sometimes forgot that the average monster’s knowledge on stars were quite rudimentary.

Ah well.

He checked around the area, dark, but illuminated by that familiar cyan glow along with the gentle sound of water running. The falls here weren’t particularly loud, and it was only now that that fact seemed a bit odd to him. Perhaps it was the magic infused in it that changed it’s consistency.

But he was distracted by his idle musing when he heard something else, echoing across the cavern. It sounded like an altercation of some sort. It was a little unlike him, but he wasted no time lightly jogging towards the source to check it out, which had Flowey sighing.

He turned the corner on his right and noticed a few monsters clamoring around, one of them, notably, a short yellow monster kid with no arms.

“H-heee , haven’t your p-parents told you not to come ‘round here, kid?” One said, looking positively deranged and honestly quite wrecked.

“U-Undyne’s too busy with that…that human to pay attention over here.” Another said; they looked marginally less deranged, but no less wrecked. “You’re basically askin to be free EXP.”

The kid backed up, putting on a scowl that still easily portrayed their fear. They backed up, right into…

“heya.” 

All parties present sans, well, Sans, immediately jumped into the air in fright, turning wild eyes his way. He met them all with that same friendly smile. But it didn’t relieve any tension, because they probably knew in truth, it wasn’t friendly at all.

“Sa— no…w-who are you?” One of them stuttered out, probably reflexively thinking he was his counterpart due to their similar cadence and habit of popping out of nowhere.

“the human that undyne’s too busy with.” He replied with innocent nonchalance.

All of them except monster kid jumped back in astonished fear, like they’d just seen the boogieman under their bed show up right in front of them. The kid didn’t look afraid anymore, but they did look equally astonished.

“A-a-a-a-a hu-h-h-h- ”

“yep, that’s right, a human.” He casually cut off their incomprehensible stuttering.

“And,” Flowey spoke up, sneering, “the captain of the royal guard is always right at his heels. You get what that means, don’t you?”

They certainly didn’t need any more encouragement; the gaggle of unstable monsters quickly scrambled off before Flowey even finished. The flower scowled at their retreating forms.

“Good riddance.” 

Sans turned his eyes back onto the kid in front of him, his grin finally gaining a little bit of warmth.

He raised a brow. “jeez kid, you really gotta watch out.”

Said kid flushed and sputtered, as if they’d been knocked out of a trance. They turned to face him properly.

“Wha… W-why did you help me! Stupid! I’m going to kill you, you know?!” 

They stomped their feet in frustration, and it looked like there were tears in their eyes they probably weren’t aware of.

Sans just shrugged.

“leaving kids to deal with getting ganged up on is bad.” He paused. “and yes, even if they want to kill me.” 

Sans could already tell the kid didn’t have it in em’ anyways, even if they had been powerful enough. Unlike them, Undyne did have that will. Lots of monsters did around here.

Monster kid gaped, mouth opening and closing several times in succession.

“Use your words, brat.” Flowey huffed, pouting when Sans shifted his shoulder as a silent request to be nice.

“GAH!” they suddenly yelled out into the ceiling, whipping their head back down to pierce Sans with what was probably supposed to be a fierce glare. 

“W-whatever man! Just you wait, human. I’m going to kill you!” Their cheeks then turned a little pink as they scuffed the ground with their foot awkwardly.

“Just! Later!” They snapped, abruptly pushing past him and running away. (Sans politely did not react when they tripped while they were at it).

“do you want to make an appointment for that?” He called.

“Shut up! ” Was the last thing they screamed at him before they disappeared around a corner and into the darkness of the cavern.

“That kid has issues.” Flowey scoffed.

“no more than anyone else around here.” Sans shrugged. “actually, i’d argue less in a lot of cases.” 

“Ugh, whatever!” 

Sans didn’t bother suppressing his smirk. Flowey and the kid weren’t too different.

“hmm, by the way, isn’t there something over there?”

He pointed across a small dilapidated looking bridge, where there was a large bunch of tall grass and glowing mushrooms dotted about.

“How the heck would I know?” Flowey grumbled.

“huh? i thought you were like all knowing or something.” He said, well aware of the bullshit coming out of his mouth (though it was true that Flowey knew many things).

The flower on his shoulder turned his face and pinned him with the most dead stare he’d ever seen.

“okay okay i get it.” He chuckled, short-cutting across the bridge and pushing the grass apart with his arms. And sure enough...

“cool, now we got a matching set.” He remarked, picking up the worn pink ballet shoes by their unraveled ribbons. They were even more caked with dust than the tutu, sparkling like they used it to replace the dulled glitter underneath it. He didn’t really want to take it to be honest, but he ended up doing so anyway, speed walking back over to the dimensional box to stuff it inside.

“whew, glad that’s taken care of.”

All that was left was to continue forward. 

Thankfully, most monsters seemed to have the idea that it was better to hide away while Undyne was hunting for a human, so there weren’t many to be seen. Well, he was pretty sure a lot ran away from him too, because he was a human. In that sense, monster kid actually was quite brave for confronting him. Flowey would probably just say they were stupid, though.

Sans quietly trekked down the path, mostly ignoring the echo flowers and managing to avoid any encounters until he reached the next room. It was just a long hallway framed by significantly less luminescent water.

Hm, didn’t someone live here? He pondered while beginning to walk forward.

And a yellow tentacle shot out of the water right as he stepped down his fifth step.

“Oh come on! ” He heard Flowey groan as Sans immediately dodged it, but it didn’t take very long at all for several more to burst out from the water, splattering the floor with water.

As Sans avoided the wriggling tentacles of doom and began to run forward to reach the end of the room, the only thought he had was that it’d be really nice if his deja vu would make the connection before he ended up in these situations.

Although Sans had what he would generously deem negative athletic ability, his proficiency in dodging and avoiding damage shouldn’t be underestimated, so he did nearly make it to the end of the room.

Nearly.

And it wasn’t even the tentacles that really did him in, it was a stupid puddle on the floor that he tripped on.

“oops- ”

The instant he was vulnerable he got snatched up by the slimy things and dragged back into the hallway, and it took all his willpower to not instantly shortcut away. It was a lot harder when he was disoriented, so it probably wouldn’t have been a good idea anyways even if there hadn’t been a camera in here, which he was 100% sure there was. 

So, he just sighed and accepted it. Although Flowey seemed pretty enraged.

The extremely uncomfortable feeling tentacles wrapped around his legs and held him upside down in the air. He looked down (or up?) and saw that the ground was maybe about a meter away.

He heard the flower attached to him grit his teeth as a pale yellow head emerged from the depths, staring at him with a goofy but sort of creepy face.

“H-hi! I’m Onionsan! Wow I can’t believe someone came down here! No one does, and and and if they do they never come back! And-” 

The terrifying monster then began to stutter and ramble on and on to its two man audience: a slowly blinking human and the flower with a twitching eye that looked very close to just killing his captor.

It seemed that Onionsan was quite lonely, since apparently no one ever talked to them…though the uncomfortable capturing was probably a contributor to that. It was really a rather self-perpetuating problem…Sans did know this monster, since he’d chatted with them a handful of times when he was in the area, but they had certainly never been this desperate.

Sans glanced down to the ground when he began to hear the earth shifting, spotting thorny vines slowly appearing, looking quite eager to just slice off every tentacle holding him and be done with it.

He shifted his shoulder to get the flower’s attention and shook his head. “flowey, don’t. ” He whispered.

Flowey snapped his head towards him, looking positively enraged. 

“But— ” he began to protest, but he cut himself off when he took in Sans’ stare, even but determined.

“please.” He said, voice deathly quiet but not whispering.

Flowey wilted and bit his lip, and Sans was a bit surprised by how quickly the vines retreated.

“Fine.” The flower hissed, but it lacked any venom. It was really more childish than anything, which made him grin a little. Sans was certain they could solve this conundrum civilly.

“hey…hey? onionsan?” He called. It took a few times before the monster stopped talking and looked at him properly.

Sans managed to look perfectly at home hung upside down via tentacles even if he absolutely was not .

“i kinda wanna chat with you, but uh, it’s pretty hard when hung i’m like a ten cicle, could ya at least put me right side up?” Preferably he’d like it if they stopped touching his skin with their slime, but starting small was probably better.

They froze, staring at him like he’d just hung the real stars right in front of them.

“Really?!?!” 

He grimaced and twitched slightly as tentacles inched upwards in likely unintentional jittering excitement.

“y-yep. but uh, it’d really help us chat if you uh, put me around and maybe move those very cool and awesome appendages down?” He said rapidly, feeling a strange headache coming on. Ugh, it was probably a human thing. He also gestured to his clothes that followed gravity when he actually allowed them to (which was only briefly as he had been conspicuously keeping it down with magic).

Flowey obviously was aware of his discomfort and looked like he was trying to explode the monster’s head with his mind. Though so far he had been unsuccessful.

“Oh! Ok!”

Thankfully Onionsan was agreeable, and quickly (eurgh…) turned him around, making him lightheaded as the heaviness in his head rushed back down. The tentacles loosened and thankfully weren’t quite as intrusive as before, which made him breath out a silent sigh of relief. It wasn’t like he hadn’t had any sensation in his bones, but human skin was a whole different ball game and those things felt freaking weird.

“so uh, whatcha’ doing here, onionsan?” 

“Well—! ” And off they went again. Sans rarely had the chance to add much of anything at all, but he did make an attempt to appear an active listener, and occasionally make small comments of his own.

Flowey seemed utterly and completely done with the world. In this moment, Sans didn’t blame him.

But Sans was patient. Very patient. Sometimes too patient. So he just stayed and listened for what was probably hours, idly savoring one of his nice creams in the meantime.

It was only hours later as he let out a yawn that Onionsan finally thought to let him go.

“W-wow! We’ve been talkin’ for a while huh??” They chirped, somehow seeming just as energetic as they were in the beginning. Though, they did look marginally less creepy.

“I don’t want to let you go…b-but...no one’s ever been so nice to me…” They mumbled, massive eyes sparkling with unshed tears. 

Though he was tired, he managed a small, genuine smile. “eh, you’re not so bad. but uh, you might have more luck if you didn’t try and capture people.” He advised, somehow managing to not sound sarcastic.

“Y-you think so?!” They gasped, as if it hadn’t occurred to them before.

“yep, i know so. might take a little time though. people prefer something a little more…uh, gentle.”

“Oh…”

They then gently put his feet back on the floor, and it was only then that he realized one of his slippers was missing. It was floating around in the water.

“I’ll get that!” The shoe was scooped up by the yellow appendage and deposited back into the floor. It was absolutely soaked. Oh well.

“thanks pal.” He still said, even though Flowey glared at it.

“Will um…will you visit again??” They asked, trying but utterly failing at seeming casual.

“sure, i’ll come back around sometime.” He said, ignoring the incredulous look Flowey was giving him. 

“You promise?!?!”

Sans stiffened for a second before making himself relax again. Promises were always bad, historically speaking. He couldn’t even keep his last one. He just hummed vaguely and shrugged in lieu of a real response, but it didn’t really seem to matter to the monster as long as it wasn’t an outright rejection.

“I’ll be waiting!!!” They brought out all their tentacles to wave him goodbye, which Sans reciprocated with just one hand as he walked into the next room’s hallway.

“You aren’t actually going to see them again, you know that right?” Flowey hissed to him, but Sans just grinned at him and shrugged.

“i might.”

“You! Ugh …” The flower rolled his eyes. “I can’t believe how much time we wasted there!”

“hmm, i dunno, that’s subjective.” 

“Are you just being contrarian for the sake of it?!” 

“no.” He replied innocently.

“Screw you.”

“sheesh , someone’s mad.” He chuckled, not bothered whatsoever.

“You’re insufferable…” The flower grumbled.

“that’s funny, cause i seem to remember a certain flower being very receptive to my insufferable please.” 

Flowey twitched, face flushing with a mix of annoyance, embarrassment, and something pained.

“M-monsters don’t say please very often! It just surprised me!” He huffed. “Which is why I also happen to find you the least insufferable in comparison, that doesn’t mean you aren’t also insufferable.” He clarified, speaking quickly. “Well…maybe second least insufferable…actually I think all the other humans were less annoying than you, hm…” Flowey squinted, looking like he was making a tierlist in his head.

“hm…who was number one then?”

Flowey paused, considering whether he should say anything. Then, slowly, he said, “...Someone I used to know. They were the nicest person I’d ever met. They also said please.” 

“huh.” A weird chill went through him, a feeling of bitterness and resentment, but they weren’t his . The weird feelings were kind of familiar, but at the same time not. He didn’t know which part of himself it all came from and frankly he was very tired of trying to figure it out. Sans decided to just block it out, a little annoyed with all the thoughts and feelings that weren't him that had been churning inside of him lately.

“that’s nice, please is a pretty good word.” Not that Sans actually used it much. But uh, it was good to be polite.

Sans also wasn’t usually very polite. Welp…

“but uh, it’d be nice to find a place to take a nap or somethin.” He really was getting rather tired, especially after listening to Onionsan for literal hours.

Flowey let out an exasperated sigh, but acknowledged his plight.

“I guess so.” He agreed, although he didn’t really look all that happy about it. Waterfall was apparently a pretty dangerous place. 

He carefully stepped forward into the next room properly, which was a small circular room with two different hallways with some plaques that he didn’t feel like reading. He was pretty sure there was a puzzle around here…

But he accidently ran into another monster instead.

Shyren—who was without her manager—looked near faint at the sight of him, her previously soft notes turning into tone deaf garbage noise in her nervousness and terror. Ah, she had probably been practicing a little in this tiny room where no one would bother her.

He quickly dodged the overwhelming and misshapen notes, reflecting her now completely out of tune tone. 

“You’ve gotta be kidding me…! ” Flowey groaned. Sans ignored him as he tried to recall how Frisk had originally placated the singing monster.

He side stepped another errant note, hitting a screeching b sharp, and remembered.

Ah, singing. That would make sense. He didn’t really sing, but he could carry a tune.

He tried to listen closely to what she was singing, and discern what notes she was actually going for. Once he was reasonably sure, he waited for a lull in the noise before making his own attempt.

Singing as a human was definitely different then as a skeleton, but he was careful to take a deep breath before quietly humming out an adjusted version of her tune. Flowey looked a little surprised, but Shyren was still a little too frazzled to pay him much mind.

Singing was a little weird, but not unpleasant. It made his throat a little sore and he felt a little out of breath when he forgot to breathe properly, but overall it was kind of fun to simply sing a little tune. And Sans actually had a pretty good ear, and had practiced identifying the names of notes by sound purely to comment on his brother’s screeching with a play by play of every note he hit. It was hilarious. It had been.

It took him a couple turns before he finally got her to listen to him, but when she did, she stared at him with wide, tearful eyes as he gently corrected her tone, as if debating with herself. When he was finished, he saw her swallow nervously before ever so slowly repeating it back to him. Not perfect, but it got better each time they went.

It didn’t turn into a concert or anything, there certainly wasn’t any skeleton selling phony tickets or monsters clamoring to listen. It was just a quiet and secluded practice session for the two of them, with the only audience the flower hanging over his shoulder.

By the end of it, they were perfectly in sync. 

“I-I-I-” The little fish monster stuttered, her face turning purple with a blush.

He let out a breath, “phew, nice singing. you’re pretty good.”

She squeaked. “Y-y-y-you too…! ” Was what she stuttered out before quickly running away.

“hm, that wasn’t too bad.” 

“Compared to most freaks down here I guess…” Flowey commented distractedly, squinting at him suspiciously.

“...what?”

“...why the heck are you of all people good at singing?!” 

Sans just laughed. “i really have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“In. Sufferable! ” 

Grinning, Sans finally stepped into the branching room. He was a little surprised to actually see the piano there, dilapidated as it was. He kind of thought Undyne wouldn’t have even bothered trying to make a puzzle, but here it was.

Pianos weren't really meant to be out in damp caverns though, not without special magical maintenance, so Sans wondered if it would actually play anything at all.

Plunk.

…Well. It could play something. Horribly out of tune and with no length, but it was something.

“ya know, the next room might be a nice spot to take a nap in.” He hummed, referring to the room behind the hidden door that opened once you solved the puzzle. 

Flowey scrunched up his nose (actually he didn’t have a nose, but that’s kind of what it looked like) in displeasure, but didn’t disagree. 

“As good a place as any I guess…you have to solve the puzzle though.”

“you don’t know the solution?” 

“I never bothered solving it, I just went underneath the door…”

“hehe. cheater.”

“You are not the one to talk.”

Well, that was fine. As Sans stared at the keys and hit a few idle notes, a simple melody came to mind. Man, these weird not memories were as helpful as they were unsettling, which was a lot to both accounts.

He hummed out the melody briefly to identify the right notes, and then carefully played it.

And open sesame! With a rumble the door was opened.

“How did you know??” 

“hmm how does anyone know anything?” he replied vaguely, grinning at Flowey’s annoyance at his non-answer.

“Ugh, whatever, just go inside!”

“yes yes.” 

He walked into the open cavern, straining his eyes against the darkness. The room was almost entirely empty except for a pedestal and…a dog.

“What the hell?”

It stared blankly at the pedestal, vacant.

“hm, sorry buddy, guess there’s no absorbable artifacts around.”

The dog drooped. Sans couldn’t help but feel bad for it even though he didn’t even know why it was so sad about it, so he reached behind his back and materialized a bone.

“hey, will this make ya feel better?” He waved it around…and it was gone from his hand in the next moment, the dog already having swallowed it whole.

“oh, ok.” 

“That is not normal.” Flowey hissed, now seemingly quite afraid of the dog as his eyes darted back and forth from him to the dog.

“well, how would you know?” 

“I just know!!”

Sans tossed a couple more the dog’s way and sat down next to the shrine, allowing the dog to crowd right into his lap and sit down with a mouthful of bones.

“i think it likes me.” 

“It likes bones.” Flowey grumbled, not appearing all that happy about the arrangement but unable to do anything about it. 

“well, you’re not wrong.” He chuckled, closing his eyes. He couldn’t really sleep for too long, but just a power nap would do. 

Sans was still sitting upright, but he was already drifting off, idle thoughts passing through his mind as he tried to digest every strange thing that had happened to him recently, such as…

His soul.

His eyes abruptly snapped open.

“crap. i forgot.” He breathed, feeling a little queasy even if he didn’t entirely show it.

“What? What did you forget?” Flowey perked up, looking concerned.

Sans glanced at him, grin turning into a slight grimace for a brief moment. 

“uh…” 

Sans really wanted to check on his soul. He really should have done it sooner, but so much had happened, and he was with Flowey all the time; they were literally attached at the hip.

“i uh, just wanna check on something.” He said, scratching the back of his head.

“...Ok? What do you need to check?” The flower predictably asked, making him sigh. Ugh, you know what, whatever. In for a penny in for a pound and all that jazz.

“i want to check my soul.”

Flowey blinked. “Your…soul?” His eyes then widened, suddenly looking very alarmed. “W-What? Is there something wrong with it? Are you dying?! ”

The sudden escalation made him choke out a laugh, and he waved his hand placatingly.

“no no, i’m not dying. and uh…the ‘something wrong with it’ part…is yet to be seen i guess.” 

“That is not very reassuring. ” Flowey groaned, though he still looked marginally less panicked once his worst fear was denied.

“it’ll probably fix itself, but uh. i still want to check on it.”

Flowey bit his lip uncertainly. “How long has it been…like however it is?”

“since i fell down.” He stated simply. It wasn’t untrue exactly, even though he didn’t have any memories of ‘falling down.’ Unless you counted falling out of your own universe.

Flowey seemed to consider that for a few moments.

“Alright…well…should I move over there?” 

Sans almost said yes, but he ultimately just shrugged and said, “nah, just don’t try and steal it or whatever.”

“I’m not going to steal it, what do you take me for?!”

Heh.

After taking a minute to gather himself (and to repeatedly scoot the dog off his lap who kept getting back on.), Sans finally put his hands in front of his chest and pulled his soul out of it, casting a bright glow against the entire cavern like it was a super night light.

“W… What the hell is wrong with your soul?! ” Flowey yelped, making Sans wince from both the volume and the blunt wording.

“hey, be nice, they’re self-conscious.” 

Flowey groaned, glaring at him just briefly before returning his eyes to Sans’ disfigured soul. “But… seriously what the fuck is that?”

Sans thought he was being a little dramatic. Sure, there’d never been anything like it, but still. It was clearly just two souls that were stuck together but unmerged. Obviously.

He shrugged. “i dunno, it’s just like that. this part was turned more that way before though.” He pointed at the white monster soul that was now tilted almost a perfect 90 degree angle inside the red human one. It was about what he had first hypothesized it would do, so at least there was nothing particularly new to worry about.

While he was at it, he also took a quick look at his stats.

...Huh, interesting. Before his HP was 1 (20), but now it was 10 (10), as if the number in the parentheses was slowly getting transferred over to the one outside it. He hadn’t noticed it before.

It wasn’t anything alarming, so he didn’t really care though.

“That’s…that’s like a violation of nature…” Flowey finally said, shaking his head slowly.

“wow.” 

“Ugh, I didn’t mean it in a bad way…mostly.” the flower admitted. “But surely it just seems… wrong to you, right?”

It did. Truthfully it did feel like a violation of nature to him as well, like he was staring at some sort of system error. But it was sort of unpleasant to think of his own soul that way, even if half of it was…well not his.

But it also was? He stared at it, the saturated red burning into his eyeballs as he tried to connect with what he was seeing. Sans said it wasn’t his, and he thought this was true, but even that statement sent a subtle feeling of wrong coursing through him. 

He didn’t want it, but it was his in a way. It was him, even though he wished it wasn’t.

Sans quickly shoved it back inside, face unreadable.

“welp, glad to have done that. nap time now.”

“H-huh? That’s it?” Flowey said, startled as he abruptly got pulled down with him when Sans flopped to the floor.

“yep, nothin’ else to see, really.”

“...Alright.”

Thankfully the flower didn’t argue, he merely huffed at how quickly Sans made himself comfortable. The dog also made itself very comfortable on top of Sans, but although Flowey wanted to, he couldn’t really do anything about that.

Sans heard the sound of vines coming up from the ground near the entranceway even though he couldn’t see it and had the tired thought that it was probably Flowey blocking off the door. That was nice.

The last thing he heard was “You better not do anything you freaky dog…” As he drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

“Hey! Stupid dog! Humans need to breathe, you know! Are you doing this on purpose?” Was the first thing he heard when he came to, as well as feeling a fuzzy mass get pushed off his face.

It was a bit of a shame, but it was nice to be able to breath without getting hair in his mouth, which was thoroughly unpleasant.

He rolled over and wished that he could just sleep for days, despite knowing that was absolutely not an option. Human eyelids were so heavy…curses.

“yes yes i’m up i’m up…” he mumbled, his previously lax expression turning up into the usual grin as his face was repeatedly licked by a little white dog.

Sans forced his eyes open and was very glad that it wasn’t very bright in here. He glanced at the flower that was glaring at the unaffected dog on the floor, suppressing a huff of laughter at their strange animosity. Sans was quite used to the dog, after all it was just like—

…Hm. But that couldn’t be true, could it?

Sans found himself staring at the dog, as if it’d give him the answers he seeked. But it was an incredibly inscrutable dog, and it just stared back with its little black eyes.

Oh well…

“how long?”

Flowey paused his dog glaring to look at him instead. “Around 30 minutes.” the flower replied.

Not too bad, he really shouldn’t keep too much longer, even if he really really wanted to.

“alrighty then. guess we better get goin.” He sighed, sounding none too pleased about it.

After wasting time stretching and drying off his still wet slipper, he finally exited the room, patting down the earth that got tossed up from Flowey’s vines with his foot.

It hadn’t really been very long, so obviously nothing outside had changed. He stepped down the hallway he hadn’t gone down before, beginning to hear the pitter-patter of the faux rainfall that tended to happen down here. 

The room became dim, and the only visible thing was the ruined statue that was set back against the wall with rain slowly assaulting it. Sans didn’t know how long that thing had been there, or where it was originally from, but it looked even more messed up than before. 

In the room just ahead, there was a can that he remembered being filled to the brim with umbrellas, but this one just had two. When he took them out, he noticed that one of them was so hole ridden it may as well not even be there.

“jeez. couldn’t have plugged them in somehow?” He murmured. Or they could have just gotten a not terrible umbrella. But whatever.  He took both of them and turned back around.

“Uh, what are you doing?” Flowey asked, perplexed.

Sans didn’t reply, and instead walked up to the dilapidated statue, unfurled the decent umbrella, and carefully found a nice spot for it. 

“ Seriously? That-”

“shh.” 

Ever so quietly, a little tune began to plink its way through the cavern, emanating from somewhere inside the statue. It was out of tune, the rhythms were off, and some notes were omitted…but it was a very familiar sound.

“...I guess that’s how you’re supposed to solve it.” Flowey muttered.

“yep.” He shrugged, listening for just a moment longer before returning to the next room, where you could see the dim reflections of large amounts of rainfall in the path ahead.

“Wait, why did you leave the good umbrella for that statue?!” Flowey exclaimed, just now noticing which umbrella Sans had kept when he opened it up.

“psh, i can deal with a little rain. we have it allll the time up on the surface.” He grinned, not knowing for sure if that was true or not.

“besides,” He gave the disgruntled flower a wink, “i’m sure it’ll be plenty dry.” 

Sans held the umbrella up despite the many holes and walked forward, hearing the pleasant pitter-patter of it hitting the fabric…and invisible magic.

“see? guess you should have had a little more faith in the poor umbrella.”

Flowey merely gave him a hilariously annoyed face and scoffed, glaring at nothing. 

Quite dry under the umbrella, they started forward. Then immediately stopped again so Sans could take off his socks and slippers and put them in his inventory. Even with the holes plugged his slippers would get absolutely soaked.

Alright, now off they went.

It was amazingly calm and relaxing around here, despite the relative danger supposedly lurking. He hummed out that music box tune and purposefully stepped heavily into the puddles, getting his shorts a little wet with the splash.

“Are you really frolicking around right now?” Flowey huffed.

“sure, why not?”

“If you didn’t understand instantly then there’s no point in explaining.” 

Chuckling, he lazily twirled around. The ultimate frolicking special move.

“hm?” He blinked and noticed a small enclave where the rain didn’t fall, and hiding away inside was…

“ Human!! ” 

“kid.” Sans greeted.

Inside the little enclave was Monster Kid, looking sort of like a wet cat. The kid puffed up in anger at the sight of him, but quickly deflated again. It seems they were too tired to get all attempted-murdery right now.

“Ugh…I can’t believe I’m stuck here while the human’s got an umbrella…” Right, they didn’t have hands…

Monster kid squinted at his umbrella in offense, but then realized…“Wait, that thing’s full of holes! How are you dry?!”

“oh you know…” He trailed off cryptically, not putting an explanation where one rightly should.

Flowey and the kid groaned at the same time. Ah, it was music to his ears. 

“if you just wanna pass through, you can come under mine.” He shrugged, grinning at their goofy face.

“Why would I ever share an umbrella with a human?! ” Or anyone, was the unspoken statement.

“so you don’t get wet?” He raised an eyebrow. Lack of understanding was written all over their face.

“Listen kid,” Flowey finally interjected with a sigh, “you’re gonna have to get it through your thick skull that this human is weird as hell and stupidly nice.”

Really, Sans was about average when it came to ‘niceness’ levels, and he wanted to tell them that their perspective was just severely skewed, but it probably wouldn’t have been of much use.

Monster kid scowled, clicking their tongue in frustration. 

“No way am I sharing an umbrella with you…whatever; I’m not gonna let some stupid fucking rain stop me!”

“woah, language.” 

Sans watched as the kid trudged out of the dry enclave, pouting at him with an expression that was probably supposed to be more intimidating. They kept a fair distance from him, getting soaked in the process.

“Just get moving—I’m gonna keep an eye on you human!”

“fine by me.” Sans agreed, walking forward without any more preamble. The kid was a bit surprised by his easy admission (and perhaps because he was turning his back to him with no hesitation), but eventually scrambled up to walk beside him. Not under the umbrella though, of course.

Sans wasn’t particularly interested in keeping an eye on the kid, but Flowey did it for him. Though even Flowey didn’t seem nervous that the little monster would actually try and kill him for real, for what that was worth. 

They really didn’t have it in them.

“so kid, what got ya in the attempted murder business? doesn’t seem like you’ve killed anyone.” Sans began.

They startled, hunching up their shoulders defensively. “Why would I tell you ? And you don’t know that!”

No, Sans really did, but he wasn’t going to say that. 

“well, why not tell me? what are the consequences, exactly?”

They opened their mouth. Then closed it again. They couldn’t think of an actual answer.

“I just…” They looked at the ground, scowling. 

“I want to be strong. Doesn’t everybody?”

“not really.” He replied. Sans was strong, but he didn’t really choose to be, or train in the same way Undyne and his brother did.

“that’s a lie!” They shot back, glaring at him. “If you’re strong, you won’t die, and…and people will acknowledge you!”

Sans closed his eyes, humming. This world—this Underground was dangerous in a way his never was. Like the worst part of every city, crime and desperation developed, coaxed by dreary conditions and a dire lack of hope. It all compounded onto itself until it was a never ending cycle of hurt. 

You wanted to be strong because people hurt you and others. If you were strong you could fight and hurt others instead. All in an effort to survive. It seemed quite simple to just say “stop doing that,” but much less simple to put into practice.

“being strong also means responsibility.” He said, voice losing its casual lilt in favor of meticulous neutrality. “if you covet power just for the sake of your own personal desires, does that make you any better than the people who made you feel like you needed it in the first place?”

Sans turned to stare at them, face as impassive as if it had been a skull the entire time.

“people will look to you for help, because they have to depend on you, and you have to make the decision on whether to respond to them or not. either way, their fate is in your hands. even if you didn’t want to make the choice in the first place. because your power is a responsibility, and even not making a choice is a choice in of itself. does that make sense?”

Monster Kid’s eyes widened, having been shocked into silence that entire time. Clearly they didn’t expect Sans to give them a philosophical lecture, but Sans was actually an expert on those.

He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders.

“heheh, maybe not.” He glanced away, looking ahead instead.

“let me give another point then, something a little more simple.”

“the way you want to become strong is a shortcut, using the misery and death of others to assert your own existence. if you gain Love, you’re becoming something other than yourself, someone unrecognizable, but you still have to take responsibility for it for as long as you live. and you’ll never forget, because it’s a sin that’s been written into your soul.”

“not to mention all the pain and suffering you’ve put back into the world.” 

Glancing at them, Sans saw their face begin to pale. He grinned.

“so, are you really prepared to kill someone and carry the burden of your murder as a scar inside your soul for the rest of your life?”

“I...I…”

“oh hey, look it’s the castle.” Sans abruptly stopped and turned, staring up at the castle that he'd seen for years and years, with the twinkling stones high up on the ceiling reflecting the bright light of hotland beyond it. Monster Kid vacantly slowed to a stop beside him, not looking.

“it’s pretty.” He said simply. It wasn’t as pretty when you were forced to look at it every day without the brightness of day to contrast the wonder of the stars, but it was still beautiful in its own way.

He didn’t really get a reply. Not that he’d really been expecting one, children tended to get overwhelmed when you dropped that sort of lecture on them.  But that didn’t mean they weren’t listening, it just meant it needed time to sink in.

Sans just casually hummed and continued on his way, the kid following distractedly all the while. At this point they were kind of under his umbrella, but it wasn’t raining anymore anyways.

It didn’t take long for the castle to disappear out of sight and for them to approach a sheer cliff edge, as well as a rusted bucket sat a little ways away. Someone taller than either of them could probably make it up just by climbing with a running start.

Monster Kid finally seemed to have broken out of their stupor, and glared at the offending cliff with slumped shoulders.

“Ugh…I-it’s too high, man…” They groaned. The kid glanced at him for a moment, considering, before their face grew stubborn again. They turned their nose up in the air and declared. “And I’m not helping you, okay?!”

“darn.” Sans mourned. “hey look it’s undyne.” He pointed behind them.

“What?!...Wait, how did you get up there??” 

“up where?”

“ There!! ”

Sans swung his feet out over the ledge from his position on top of the cliff, which was now conquered.

“where’s there? also who.”

“Ugh, you—screw you! Don’t think you’re getting away! I’ll just find another way through!” They stomped their foot on the ground in a way that reminded him of Papyrus. He wasn’t really sure if he appreciated the reminder or not.

“me? get away? i could never.” He put a hand to his cheek in phony shock, but did absolutely nothing to suppress his grin. 

“ Humans are so crafty… ” Monster Kid groaned, “and annoying…”

“ Tell me about it… ” Sans heard Flowey mutter.

“that’s not exactly exclusive to humans.” Sans mused. This craftiness and annoying-ness was all monster born and raised, okay?

“Whatever!” Monster Kid turned their back to him, ready to run off before looking over their shoulder one more time. “D…Don’t you dare get killed by Undyne…you’re my kill!” They turned and looked at the floor. “Y-ya know…”

“heh.” Sans grinned and stood up from the ledge. “you don’t gotta worry about that.”

They may have said something else, but it was so muffled Sans couldn’t understand it before they quickly ran off again. Sans was admittedly a little concerned for them going off on their own, but they’d been fine for the most part, and they probably needed some time to think, too.

“That was a little surprising…” Flowey said once the kid was gone.

“what was?” 

Flowey’s face scrunched up, “You know! You were so serious; it really came out of left field.”

“heheh. well, i do know a thing or two about lecturing people.” Kind of part of the job description. Plus, if you couldn’t stop an anomaly with force, you really had no other choice but to reason with them. Or tug on their heartstrings. Not that it ever worked, clearly.

Sans was about to walk off when he remembered that he still had the spotty umbrella, “oh whoops.” It was situated in the bin down below in the next blink as if it had always been there. Flowey squinted at it with offense but said nothing. 

Sans turned and finally walked forward, but stopped as a foreboding feeling washed over him. Just ahead was black caverns with winding docks going in all sorts of directions. Many crumbled apart, and many were dead ends.

Though it was in more disrepair than usual, it wasn’t an unfamiliar sight. The place was completely nonsensical, but a lot of monster architecture was, for the sake of the longtime tradition of setting up traps and puzzles for human invaders. These maze-like bridges were one of them.

Asgore had repeatedly made attempts to rectify some of the more dangerous bits, but monsters were pretty stubborn about their puzzles and traditions and many of his suggestions had been denied. Asgore, who was not really much of an authoritarian power so much as a protector and overseer, had only been firm on the most dangerous stuff and had quickly given up on the parts that were mostly extremely inconvenient, if that was really what people wanted.

Sans had always silently been in the “make stuff less annoying” camp, but of course Papyrus was very adamant on the importance of making everyone do puzzles every day because it would surely build character and also puzzles were awesome. So, there was that.

He was letting himself get distracted though. His weird not-memories had finally come ahead of time, and he remembered that Undyne had pursued the human here. Unsurprising; it was the perfect place to do it.

He sighed. “just so you know, there’s like a 99% chance we’re getting jumped here.”

Flowey froze for a second before scowling. “I figured—there’s no better place to do it.” The flower turned to him with a hard expression. “I know the right path to take, but some are broken, and what isn’t has a very high chance of becoming broken.”

It wasn’t too dissimilar to the last time he had to run for his life from an incredibly murderous fish woman.

He shrugged his shoulders, not liking the circumstances but determined to push forward.

There was a save point here, luckily, so he used that both for the (still unlikely) circumstance of his death and also for the little pick-me-up. Sans also took his slippers and socks off yet again after having put them back on at some point because he’d almost certainly lose them or trip on them. This hadn’t been an issue when he just took shortcuts everywhere and moved at a snail’s pace, but they were proving kind of inconvenient in these circumstances. 

At least this time he didn’t have to hold Flowey, who was securely wrapped around his arm and waist. The small bit of weight was even comforting in a way, which was an ironic thought considering Sans had distant memories of being nearly squeezed to death by vines in the past. He’d received so many new memories since receiving his stolen soul that he hadn’t really had the time to sort through them all, and that was one that came to mind occasionally.

Now obviously wasn’t the time to get organizing, but he’d probably say that even if he did have the time.

Sans took a deep breath, coming to stand at the precipice of the end of the hallway. He turned his own soul blue, feeling that weightless and light feeling wash over him with his soul as its focal point. There was no need to waste time, he just started running immediately.

And just like he had expected, Undyne didn’t waste any time either. Glowing circles of magic spread over the wooden space, and magical spears emerged from them barely a second afterwards. 

Sans wouldn’t let that stop him though. He avoided them all and ran past with a swiftness that he could only muster under the effects of his own magic. Really, he could just fly by manipulating his own soul, but that was a tiny bit conspicuous, so he didn’t. He just let himself barely brush against the ground so that it looked like he was running.

He registered and followed Flowey’s instructions in the back of his mind, focused on observing and predicting the spears, which were incredibly speedy. Most were arranged at random, but he quickly noticed that some were more directly targeted to cut him off or just screw him up in some way. It was devastatingly effective considering how little time one had to move out of the way.

Sans had something a human wouldn’t, though.

Magic sensing.

He’d always been excellent at feeling out magic, and that ability had only increased since. That gave him an extra window of time to sense where the spears would coalesce, as magic began to focus itself into certain spots.

Most monsters couldn’t do it very effectively, partially out of a lack of need, and partially from a lack of talent, but a human doing it was out of the question, so much like how Papyrus had no idea how he had figured out there was no exit to his unfair puzzle, Undyne would have no idea he had any sort of advantage in that regard.

Though still, with the sheer speed and volume she pushed these deadly weapons out, Sans definitely wasn’t having an easy time at all. 

He heard Flowey swear and inform him that he was going to have to jump. Which was no problem. He made sure he didn’t nearly miss this time. He landed back down on the dock without much weight, and was quite thankful for that considering the condition of the wood. The pressure of Undyne’s magic was doing more damage to it then Sans running on it did, and he had to pay very close attention to any potential falls or holes. Getting tripped up by that would be extremely bad. 

But suddenly the path ended, and with it Undyne’s assault of spears.

“ Shit , did she cut it off ahead of time?!” Flowey yelped, staring over at the hallway they couldn’t reach. It was much too far for Sans to convincingly jump over. 

Sans wouldn’t be surprised if she had. Undyne may not be the most forward thinking monster of all time, but she didn’t mess around when it came to humans. And he was sure this Undyne would be just as if not even more vicious and meticulous. (meticulous was a relative word when it came to Undyne.)

There was no point staring across the chasm, so he turned around just in time to see Undyne appear from the darkness. With his human eyes, it was hard to make her out before she materialized a bright spear in her hands.

Sans stared at her neutrally, carefully recording her every movement and ready to move should she attack despite his relatively relaxed body language.

“Human.” She began. It was the first time he had properly heard her since he came here. She sounded similar to how he knew her, but there were definitely differences. And pretty much all of those differences served to make her even more intimidating than usual.

“undyne.” He parroted back to her casually, though there was a certain cautiousness about it if one listened carefully.

She paused in consideration, gripping her spear a little tighter.

“You keep running away.”

“uh, yeah? why wouldn’t i?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow at her. What, was he just gonna happily walk right into the jaws of death? Flowey might think he was prone to it but he really wasn’t.

She, for a reason he couldn’t fathom at the moment, gripped her spear so tight with anger that Sans thought it might shatter. Undyne stomped forward a step, gripping a fist in front of her.

“To not be a coward?!” 

Sans just blinked. “uh…”

An intelligent response was apparently unnecessary, because she continued, furious passion infecting her previously chilling voice the longer she went on.

“Humans are meant to be warriors! Monster killing machines! With giant swords! I’ve been waiting my whole life to battle to the death with a human and you just keep running away! Fuck off!” 

She scoffed. “Not to mention you haven’t even fought a single other monster; I can’t believe a human finally falls down and they end up being such a weak idiot .”

Flowey bristled at her, but Sans just grinned slightly and tilted his head. “isn’t that a good thing for you?” He asked.

“NO!” She yelled, swinging her spear through the air viciously. “I want a fight and you’re not giving it to me!”

He felt just a tiny bit bad for her since apparently she’d been waiting her whole life for this duel of epic proportions, but really only a tiny bit. Sans had no interest in the art of fighting and never understood it. Papyrus liked it, which Sans didn’t mind or anything, but it just didn’t click for him. What was so fun about hitting other people and getting hit? Of course, his constitution probably coloured his opinion quite a bit, but still.

He shrugged. “well that’s too bad, cause i hate fighting. what’s even the point?” He wondered, fairly genuinely, all things considered.

Sans couldn’t see her face, but she seemed utterly gobsmacked by his answer.

“ ‘What’s even the point…?’ it’s—it’s more than just fighting , it’s a heart to heart experience! Putting everything about yourself on the line! The adrenaline, the drama!! ” She preached emphatically, though her reasonings got more and more violent the longer she went on. A heart to heart experience, huh?

He shook his head. “hm, yeah i still don’t get it.”

Undyne shook her head, gripping her helmet. “ This is so unfair…why couldn’t we have gotten a human who likes to do battle…?! ” 

Her phrasing reminded him of something Papyrus had said about the human once, but he couldn’t afford to get wistful because she quickly straightened and pointed her spear at him with a raised arm.

“Well, whatever! You’re going to fight me whether you like it or not, human. I don’t care where it is, you’re not leaving here alive.” She intoned, voice regaining its chilling quality as her eyes pierced him through the darkness.

He tensed, wondering what he should do. He was pretty sure Undyne didn’t do this with Frisk before. Before she had…right, she’d split the bridge and let Frisk fall.

Hm…

Sans whispered something to Flowey. “ What?! ” He exclaimed with a low voice. 

“c’mon, it’ll be fine. it’s the best option, right?” Sans chuckled with a tinge of nervousness that was hard to detect.

Flowey bit his lip but made his decision quickly seeing as Undyne was stalking towards them. And when Undyne chucked her spear at him, he acted.

Flowey formed a horizontal array of pellets and hit them in a line against the brittle bridge. At the same time, Sans used his own magic to subtly put pressure on that point, immediately causing the bridge to crumble. Sans felt the floor underneath him give way and put him into freefall, and he was suddenly rushing downwards with his back facing the ground.

Undyne didn’t sit back and do nothing though, Sans watched as she quickly rushed to the edge of the broken bridge and threw a crackling spear right at his head. His eyes widened and he was forced to quickly dodge midair and tilt his head away from it, where it passed by barely an inch away and cut through strands of his hair as it hurtled towards the ground below.

The sheer energy of the spear whipping past him made him dizzy, and combined with the adrenaline of near death and falling, he felt like he was near passing out. Not good.

He was unable to stop the black spots from entering his vision, blearily catching sight of Undyne high up on the deck, apparently deciding it wasn’t worth it to jump down after him. Wait, how close was he to the ground?

Sans really should do something about that, but he was too disoriented to use magic.

Oh well, Flowey’d probably catch him, right?

Chapter Text

“There was a sound over here…”

“...You’re…?!”

“You fell down…?”

“...”

“...”

“I…alright. Fine. Let me help you up.”

“What? Your name is Chara? I didn’t really ask, you know…”

“Whatever...Ok…Well, my name is—”

“WAKE UP!”

Sans’ eyes shot open instantly. His vision was immediately filled with yellow and green. Flowey.

“fancy meeting you here.” Was what he quietly said, watching as his flowery friend’s face went through a grand series of emotions: surprise, relief, annoyance, and finally, rage. He was laying on a fluffy bed of golden flowers, and he could hear the sound of gently flowing water.

“You…” Flowey seemed to lack the words to express himself. Sans just stared up at the dark ceiling above.

What an odd dream. Was ‘dream’ even the correct thing to call it?

He closed his eyes. In his soul, words, feelings, and memories overlapped. It filled his heart with unease, but warmth, pain, and nostalgia all at the same time. He didn’t like it, but this time he allowed himself to feel it anyway. 

That name, he already knew the answer, didn’t he?

“Are you even listening to me?!” The flower in front of him hissed, eyes blackened with annoyance.

His mouth finally turned back up into its grin properly, and he also finally focused his gaze on the flower who’s been nagging him this whole time.

“hm, not at all. sorry. kinda just woke up from passing out. what happened?” Sans could mess with him even more, but that seemed a little too cruel to the stressed flower.

“Ugh, idiot—you passed out and couldn’t stick the landing, so I had to make sure you didn’t break your neck and literally your entire body when you fell!”

“and that is greatly appreciated.” He grinned, making a deadpan stare fall upon him.

“you almost died, you know.”

“sounds like business as usual. but i mean, i’d just wake up at the save point, right?” He pointed out reasonably.

Flowey grimaced, but didn’t disagree. “well, yes but…what about your zero deaths run…?” He grumbled quietly.

“hehe, i’m glad you’re so dedicated to keeping it.” Sans certainly didn’t want to use that stupid save point if he didn’t have to, so all the better.

“passing out while falling though…what a blunder, i really suck.” He sighed and crossed his arms, shaking his head regretfully even though he had an amused expression on his face. The shockwave of Undyne’s spear had been intense. Speaking of, it was buried deeply in the water just a little ways from him.

Staring at it, it really hammered in the point that he really did almost get skewered, and humans had all sorts of guts and blood and various types of bodily matter, so it also probably would have been incredibly gruesome. 

…he should probably stop thinking about it, now that he had a stomach, he might actually throw up if he wasn’t careful.

Sans patted his chest a few times to still his quickly beating heart while taking an even breath.

“anyways, i’m alive. you obviously caught me pretty well, cause i feel perfectly fine.” Kind of winded, and a little disoriented, but overall, fine.

Flowey sighed, seeming to have given up on his fury and as well as his attempts to get Sans to take things seriously.

“Well good. I guess. Let’s just get moving before she tries to find the body.”

“fine by me.” Sans shrugged, carefully standing himself up atop the bed of golden flowers. He still felt a little shaky, but he’d be fine in a minute or two. He was currently bereft of shoes, so he could feel how soft they were under his feet. It was a good thing he had decided to put them in his inventory, or else he had no doubt they’d have been lost forever. And they’d probably stay there for a while longer considering…

“This is the garbage dump.” Flowey informed him once he was up. “All sorts of stuff flows in here from the surface. I haven’t heard anyone around so far, but people come here every so often to look through it, so be careful.”

“got it.” He confirmed, even though it wasn’t anything he wasn’t already aware of. 

Sans stepped off the bed of flowers, very briefly wondering when they had shown up there before his feet landed in the water. It was just a few inches away from where his shorts ended, so if he wasn’t careful the edges would get soaked in no time. Not that it would be a problem when they reached hotland, though.

He didn’t bother trying to step on the few pieces of deck still hanging on and simply waded through the water, avoiding stepping on any wayward trash and the like. He looked at the trash with slight curiosity, but he didn’t see anything all that notable to him. It was just the same old trash as always.

Though, Sans did get an odd feeling of very slight familiarity when he saw some items and brand names, even though he didn’t really know what they were. Creepy, but it was easy to ignore at least.

Up ahead was a save point, which he immediately dipped his hand into after stepping up on the deck.

The confrontation with Undyne was honestly pretty damn terrifying, but hey, so was fighting a raging anomaly who was going to erase the world. He’d just have to push through, there was no other way. And he couldn’t just ignore Undyne and skip right to Hotland. It wouldn’t actually accomplish anything.

He let the tingling vestiges of something that felt similar adrenaline linger a bit longer before pulling his hand away. He’d just saved, so there was no need to worry about what had happened before.

Alrighty, back to wading through trash.

But oh man, it honestly kinda smelled down here. He hadn’t really noticed it as a skeleton, but trash smelled…well. Like trash. Go figure. Hm, at least the ever present magic in the air muted it somewhat. Sans remembered now rather distant memories of Alphys self-deprecatingly boasting that she was here so often that she was one with the smell. With all these new memories, all the old ones became a little foggier, like skipping forward a few years in a few seconds and the things that were once familiar became just a little less clear.

Well, he supposes that’s what happens when you gain hundreds of timelines worth of memories, though given he hadn’t remembered anything at the time they were actually happening, the similar ones sort of blended into a singular flavor. Ugh, he felt old all of the sudden; old-er.

Just as he was getting real deep into memory lane, Sans bumped into something.

“whoops…”

It was a dummy.

“What the heck is this thing doing just sitting here…” Flowey muttered, squinting at the dummy that was now toppled over and gently floating around in the water.

Eh, Sans had a few guesses. Well, he was just gonna go around like so…

And dodge the knife aimed at his head after he walked past. He sighed. Flowey shrieked.

“i’d really appreciate it if people would stop aiming sharp objects at my head.” He bemoaned, turning around to face the dummy who pulled him into a Fight.

“Pathetic…pathetic! PATHETIC!! You’re unbelievably pathetic!” The possessed dummy bellowed, full of holes and missing a fair amount of stuffing. But their eyes were just as energized as usual, and of course, incredibly mad.

“Dummies are meant for Fighting, you know!! Fighting!! And with my cousin you just…refused...??” They trembled with rage. “Unbelievable! They were so shocked that you spooked them right out of their body!!”

“is that so.” 

“Despicable! Do you know how hard it is to find the right body?!” 

“couldn’t they just go back in?”

“And not to mention!!” Ah, they were completely ignoring him, huh.

“You haven’t even tried to fight Undyne! How dare you, how dare you, HOW DARE YOU?!”

Oh, right, wasn’t this Undyne’s training dummy? Apparently they were quite invested in her epic anime battle dreams. Though frankly, as a training dummy, that was sort of the most normal thing in the world, so it wasn’t actually that notable.

Ah, by the way, this entire time he had been getting barraged by bullets and knives, of which this dummy apparently had a great number of. It was a little tough, but nothing even close to Undyne’s spears. So in other words: perfectly manageable. It was just a little more annoying in the water, but if he kept inside the blindspot of a certain camera he could use a bit of magic without the dummy noticing, given it was barely even paying Sans any attention.

“Stupid dummy!” Flowey groused, glaring a hole in the dummy’s button face. 

Well, he could go along with this and wait until this potentially resolved itself (through a certain mopey ghost), or he could be a little more proactive and take his own approach. He happened to remember a couple of key details about this dummy, and hopefully they would ring true in his universe as well.

As he was thinking, he had to dodge a vicious attack involving the dummy’s middle opening up into a big, teethy maw and trying to chomp him. How utterly delightful and not disturbing at all; as expected from this weird world.

“Hahaha I’ll kill you! Kill you! Kill you!! Why?! No particular reason!!”

“don’t you have something you need to do?” Sans asked, tilting his head as he jumped away from a barrage of magic bullets.

“Hah?!” They questioned.

“your chosen body—are you really satisfied with it?”

That finally gave them pause. In fact, they even almost tripped over themselves despite the fact that they were floating. 

“W-what?!” They puffed furiously, but with a tinge of self-consciousness, “This body is perfect…ly fine! No complaints!...disregarding all the negatives—No complaints!!”

“hmmm. well, i’ve heard the royal scientist has an even greater body available that she’s not even using.”

“Where the heck did you hear that?!” Flowey huffed, though he glanced to the side after a moment. “Well...not that you're wrong…if you’re referring to what I think you are, that wretched thing…” He muttered, looking disgusted.

“A…an even greater body…?” They repeated, staring at him with wide eyes.

“yep, call it a hunch, but i feel like you should really ghost-see it, at the very least.”

“It’s hidden underneath her bed.” 

“It’s hidden underneath her bed.” Sans wisely informed the dummy using his own totally not borrowed wisdom.

“Guh…w-well…There’s no harm taking a look I guess…” The dummy agreed reluctantly.

“cool, can i leave now?”

“NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY!!” 

His bangs were blown back by the force of their refusal.

“This changes nothing! Hahaha! Without magic you can’t harm me; I’ll keep you here for an eternity!...and once that eternity is over…I’ll go check that body!”

Sans crossed his arms, putting one hand on his cheek thoughtfully.

“hmm, well. it’s true that as a certified human i definitely can’t use magic,” ignoring Flowey’s impressive eyeroll, “but this isn’t a 1v1 battle, you know?”

Magic pellets materialized, ready and waiting to strike. 

Flowey really wasn’t just an accessory.

The dummy recoiled in shock, expression hilariously bewildered.

“N-no way!! That flower necklace can use magic?!”

Uh oh, please don’t provoke the flower, he was really loud. Though right now said flower was just muttering darkly and incomprehensibly as if he was casting a curse, which might actually be the case given how venomously he was glaring at the dummy.

“hey hey, he’s not a necklace.” He quickly denied, attempting to block Flowey’s view with his hand; it was pointless though given the flower could easily move around it and did.

“he’s my super duper best flower pal and if he places a curse on you i graciously take full responsibility.”

That statement finally snapped Flowey out of his glare to instead whip his head around and glare at him with a pink face.

“What the hell are you even saying?!”

Thankfully, before Sans was forced to answer to Flowey’s tsundere wrath, Napstablook finally decided to make their appearance. 

“Am I………interrupting something……?”

Sans raised his hand enthusiastically. “yes you are and thank you very much for doing it. you’re the best.”

The ghost just blinked. Poor thing probably had no idea how to respond to that.

“Gah! Whatever! I’m done with this…” The mad dummy finally said, glancing between him, Flowey, and their cousin. They quickly began floating away. “I gotta look into infiltrating the royal scientist’s bedroom…” Was what they muttered to themselves before they disappeared.

Sorry Alphys, it looked like he had just sicced a home invader on the poor scientist, and it hadn’t even ended the battle. Oh well.

“fancy seein’ ya here.”

Napstablook floated forward, curiously and uncertainly glancing back at where their cousin had left, but ultimately choosing not to comment on it.

“Yes…….I…..to be honest, I did not expect to meet you again.” They confessed.

Sans grinned. “you asked me to visit didn’t ya? far be it from me to refuse. and i haven’t even died a single time, how about that.”

A very small smile briefly appeared on their sullen face. “Yes…I suppose I did. Um...well. My house is ahead, so you can come inside if you like……” They turned around to go back the way they came, Sans moved to follow.

“don’t mind if i do.” He agreed easily, looking forward to a break that was in an actual house and not just on the ground. Flowey frowned cautiously, but didn’t make any move to stop him from following the ghost into their little farm.

Napstablook gestured to the middle path and nodded, silently floating off and leaving Sans alone. They passed right over a save point, sat right in front of a body of water. 

Sans let a few peaceful moments pass. “hmm, it’s pretty nice here.”

Flowey made a vague shrugging motion and a deadpan stare. “Not many people come here, given it, you know, has Undyne’s house.” Flowey informed him, pointing a vine at the leftmost path.

“you don’t seem as freaked out by that as i thought you would.” He noted.

Flowey rolled his eyes. “I already knew we would have to pass through here when we fell into the dump, I’m over it by now.” He replied dryly. “Plus, there’s no way she’s just hanging around over here.” He continued.

Sans hummed, “fair enough.” The intuitive thought might be that Undyne would definitely be here given she saw him fall down. But that was if you didn’t know Undyne. There’s no way she would want to fight in such a lame, disadvantageous spot. She’d even have to hold back to make sure she didn’t utterly destroy the surrounding area given she lived here.

It wasn’t like the average human could really do much to ghosts, so that wasn’t much of a concern for her either.

So yeah, this place was pretty safe all things considered, despite how backwards that seemed.

He skirted around the pool of water and walked up to Napstablook’s house. It looked even more lonely than usual, but it certainly could have been worse. Sans would even consider it peaceful considering how uncomfortable most of Waterfall was.

Sans knocked on the door and waited a second, but alas Napstablook clearly didn’t know the good art of knock knock jokes and didn’t answer, so Sans just shrugged and walked inside.

When he stepped inside, he immediately noticed that it seemed the corners of the house were fighting a slowly losing battle against the cobwebs. It was also fairly barebones, but that was quite regular for Napstablook anyways. The most notable feature was the trashed TV stuffed in a corner of the room.

Overall though, it was dry, safe, and…relatively clean. Now if only he could finally find a bed…

“fancy meeting you here.” He greeted the ghost, grinning widely at the repeated joke while gleefully ignoring Flowey’s annoyed face.

“Um………….yes……” Napstablook replied, turning away from their computer to look at him. A thoroughly awkward silence followed.

They had invited him over, but that didn’t mean their social skills were much better than usual. They were more direct, at least.

Sans found a decent spot to sit, though it ended with him sprawling out over the floor. (And subsequently lifted up off it by a disgusted Flowey who determinedly wiped the dust off the floor before putting him back down). 

“hope ya don’t mind me taking a break in here.” He yawned, wanting to take another nap but also finding himself quite hungry. “and maybe having a snack.” He continued as an after thought.

Napstablook made what sort of looked like a shrugging motion. “I don’t mind. you must be tired.” The ghost agreed, floating over to the dingy looking fridge.

“Um…you can have a ghost sandwich if you’re hungry.” They offered, causing Sans to roll over to get a look at it. He had a vague memory of a transparent sandwich passing right through his fingers and onto the ground. That wouldn’t do.

Sans mimed holding out a hand to grab it, but he was actually just grabbing it with his magic, which did the trick. It felt really cold on his human fingers though, sending a shiver through his body.

“woah.” 

When eaten, it completely passed through his mouth and body, but if he prepared his magic to absorb it then it would disappear. Though it felt profoundly unsatisfying, it did give him a relatively small boost in magic.

“...........in retrospect, I’m very surprised that worked……..” The ghost said after a minute, staring at where the ghost sandwich used to be. 

“heh, maybe i’ve actually been a ghost this whole time without realizing it.” He joked, though privately thinking that he wouldn’t actually be that surprised should that be the case.

“Perhaps…Undyne has tried to kill you a lot.” The ghost paused, “At least I think so…I don’t actually know.” they admitted.

“oh she has. but i’m pretty darn sure she hasn’t actually succeeded yet.” Sans grinned. “not that the ‘yet’ is necessary, but better safe than be wrong. that would be the worst case scenario.”

“but anyways, thanks for the sandwich but i’m actually still kind of hungry, so i’m gonna have some grillby’s.” He said, bringing out the other half of his Grillby’s burger from his inventory. It looked just as delicious as the last time he saw it; praise be to the wonders of inventory space.

“Would it kill you to sit up if you’re going to eat?” Flowey muttered, judging him from his position on his stomach with his hands in front to hold the burger.

“probably.” Sans said seriously. Flowey slapped a leaf to his face.

“Whatever! Just don’t get the floor even more dirty.” Flowey glanced briefly at the ghost. “No offense.”

“woah, flowey must really like you, napstablook.” 

The only response he got was the weak slap of an annoyed leaf on his face, though he could feel the flower’s glare even if he couldn’t see it.

“Just shut up and eat, idiot.”

And so he did. While he was at it he asked what was up with the broken TV. He had wanted to ask about that from the beginning, but it seemed like something that shouldn’t be brought up so quickly.

Napstablook had replied slowly, staring at the TV with a complex mixture of emotions: anger, bitterness, loneliness…but mostly regret. And a strong sense of resignation.

“It was a mistake.” 

After that Sans took the time to doze off on their floor, eventually hearing the quiet click clack of their keyboard while they went about their business. It was nice, honestly, even if laying around here kinda made him feel like garbage.

What was he even doing? What the heck was up with his life? He just couldn’t catch a break, huh? Standing in that golden hallway feels like eons ago, but at the same time so close. He took some time to try and organize all these new memories, but it felt like an impossible task. Millions of timelines, each one going down the same well-worn paths that Sans couldn’t remember before, like a horror show built specifically for him with all his fears. It made a dark satisfaction settle in him, all of it justification for his lack of motivation to try his hardest. Because it really had been pointless, hadn’t it?

Hah…but he also remembers precious moments, where he tried a little bit anyway. Settling in with Toriel and eating her pie, working with everyone after all the souls went missing and Asgore was gone…Doing his best for his brother who was made king, even though it would surely be reset anyways. Because Papyrus shouldn’t have to suffer even then, even if it’d be torn away anyways. It still happened.

And despite all this, he had picked himself up off the ground at the very beginning of the ruins and decided to walk down this path. Retracing the human’s steps in ways that are so very familiar deep down in his borrowed soul. Determinedly sparing monsters, making friends, going down such a difficult path…was that really something Sans would have done before he fell down? He had thought this when passing the gauntlet of deadly terror, too. Second guessing himself on who he even was. If your soul was completely different, could you really call yourself the same person?

He didn’t know. But what he did know was that now he had control over his life, as bitter as it feels. The timeline is his. And right now he can just single mindedly focus on doing this; shattering the barrier, setting monsters free, and leaving it be. He can have that timeline.

He abruptly sat up, jerking Flowey up with him.

“welp, that was a bad idea.” He stated simply, banishing all errant thoughts from his brain and cramming them into a box to be opened later (or never.)

“Oh………….weird thoughts, huh? Sorry……my floor tends to do that.” 

“heh, it’s all good.”

Yeah, he had this thought before, but now it was really solidified to him that he absolutely could not take too much time to stop and think. He’d lose all his momentum and crash and burn the second he did. He could do that after this was all over and rot in bed for a while. After.

Sans picked himself up off the floor and pulled his arm into a satisfying stretch, grinning at the ghost across the room.

“i should probably get goin, sorry I didn’t stay too long.” 

Napstablook nodded and hesitated. “It’s okay…..um. Please be careful.” They said, more firmly than how they usually spoke.

“course, i got a streak to maintain.” He chuckled. The ghost smiled just slightly, even if they didn’t entirely get the joke.

And with that, he was off. He didn’t really bother looking around the farm or anywhere else in the area, but he did briefly look over at a small gap in the water over on the left, where he vaguely remembered a little bird resting…

Now that he thought about it, couldn’t he have just jumped over that gap with blue magic? 

…

Sans was going to choose not to think about it, surely all those encounters were for a good cause…

Anyway…

He continued forward, coming to a door and short pathway. These were, of course, Gerson’s shop and the riverperson’s boat respectively. Though the terrain looked even more wild and claustrophobic than usual, as someone who’d been deeply familiar with the Underground, it was easily identifiable. And so far, most things were in their rightful places, even with some changes between worlds.

Sans had no intention of using it, but he did decide to at least check out the riverperson, maybe attempt to chat with them. However…

The room was…ominous. Dark. The riverperson was a towering figure on the unconventional looking boat, the shadow they cast appearing darker the closer it was. They were hard to focus on, with both sharp edges and fuzzy curves in their silhouette. And somehow, the darkness inside their hood just seemed…darker.

Yep, that was pretty terrifying. He barely missed a beat and turned right on his heel to head back the other way. Maybe he’d try another time. He heard Flowey mutter about how he hated that guy once they were out of earshot.

Instead, he stepped into Gerson’s shop.

“Wah ha ha….so the human’s decided to step into my shop; that’s pretty brave.”

“aw, how could you tell?” His face immediately split into an especially wide grin, very obviously giving the game away.

“isn’t it obvious?”

To Sans, this Gerson wasn’t really all that different from the one he knew. He seemed a little rougher, his eye a little sharper as he studied him, and most notably had a worn hammer leaning close by…

But overall, he definitely could have been a lot worse. 

Sans merely shrugged and grinned as his response. 

“Just so you know, you can’t attack me here, so don’t even bother trying.”

Sans raised a brow. “i wasn’t exactly planning on it.”

Gerson’s shoulder’s slumped a little as he sighed. “I s'pose not…you haven’t even tried fighting anyone, have you?”

“heh. so you do know.”

“I may be old, but I definitely still keep my ears to the ground.” Gerson smirked, but then let out another deep sigh, rubbing his forehead that was full of wrinkles.

“At this rate, Undyne’s gonna come complainin’ to me about lyin’ to her about humans.”

What, did this guy feed her some misinformation? 

“oh? that wouldn’t happen to be the part about humans being monster killing machines, would it?”

Gerson rolled his eyes, but his gaze still pierced into him anyways.

“If you woulda’ been there when the war happened, you wouldn’t be able to disagree.”

No, Sans supposed he wouldn’t. It wasn’t like he was that invested in coming to the defense of humans in the first place. Though for the sake of their future, it was probably for the best if humans and monsters learned to get along. It wasn’t impossible after all; Sans had experienced it with his own eyes.

Sans shrugged. “guess not. i’m not too interested in all that war stuff.” His grin widened as he thought of something.

“oh, speaking of all that war stuff, what’s the deal with asgore?”

Truly the most subtle segue of all time.

Gerson stared at him for a moment or two before closing his eyes.

“Hm. I dunno these days. I suppose that fool might be long gone by now.”

“long gone?”

“Hah hah… in every sense except physical, I mean.” He paused, letting out a rough guffaw, “or hell, maybe physical too, cause hardly anyone sees hide or hair of that guy!”

Papyrus had mentioned something similar, too. It was definitely a very obvious change from his Asgore, who was usually socializing with monsters more than he was actually doing any official kingly duties. Either that or tending to flowers.

“well, what’s up with you, then? isn’t it pretty dangerous around here?”

“Pah, I can handle some riled up idiots high on Love. ‘Sides, everyone knows I went toe to toe with humans back in the day; they’re way too cowardly to challenge me!” He cackled, finding it all quite hilarious.

“huh. did you ever kill any?”

“Nope, but you don’t gotta tell them that, wah ha ha!”

Sans eventually left after buying some sea tea (because he was actually thirsty), and a crab apple for later And, of course, a torn notebook and glasses.

Flowey stared at them for a long, long while until Sans put them away.

“...uh, do you wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

And that was that.

Sans shrugged and just continued forward before Flowey stopped him.

“Wait…just so you know, it’s…weird past here.” Flowey said, having snapped out of his angst enough to squint suspiciously down the path.

“weird? i’m pretty used to weird.”

“I mean, this is where most of those addicts hang around. It’s close to Undyne’s, but it’s also incredibly easy to get lost in the darkness. Not to mention that village is hidden around…Not even Undyne’s actually found it yet.”

“oh, and you have? not being a very upstanding citizen keeping that to yourself, are you?” He grinned while Flowey scoffed.

“It’s not like it’d actually solve the core of the issue.”

“alright alright.” Sans chuckled. Hm…temmie village was a den of drug addicts, huh? Well…Flowey’d probably get mad at him, but Sans was awfully curious about that.