Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Kim Dokja can feel it when the hallucinations start. In the pitch darkness of his room, only the glaring light from his laptop screen fills his view, effectively melting his vision. The words on the open document blur. He’s seeing double.

He knows it’s what having no more than a couple hours of sleep in a week does to you, but Han Sooyoung had written a novel on another one of her delusional caffeine-driven sprees—that means he has to help her edit over a thousand pages of complete garbage and it’s completely his fault that he has the self-control of a child.

How long was it again—seven hundred thousand words?

[Chapter ■■ – Protagonist]

Kim Doyoon stared in apprehension, a pulsing in his ears. Yoo Joonhyun was every bit as handsome as he’d imagined him to be, blood on his cheek and sword strapped to his hip. The thought persisted even though it was his turn to be at the receiving end of the regressor’s ire.

 

His feet dangled off the edge of the bridge, nails clawing at Yoo Joonhyun’s hands wrapped around his neck. “...keugh, bastard-”

 

…

[Comments]

Kim Dokja: [Highlighted text] sholdn’t he be angrier

Kim Dokja: he is being choked

Kim Dokja: also, what is wrng with ur title

Han Sooyoung: Marked as resolved

Kim Dokja: ??? listen to me. titles are importnat

Han Sooyoung: i dont listen to someone who cant spell

If it isn't for the fact that he is due to wake up in two hours and is already asleep with his eyes open, Kim Dokja likely would’ve gone ahead and ruined her draft.

Instead, he blinks through the burn in his eyes and gathers the last vestiges of his energy to send one last quip.

Kim Dokja: i am ur editor

An adequate response.

He needs to go to bed.

Less than a minute later, Kim Dokja has crawled under his sheets and closed his eyes, hopefully permanently.

At the same time, a pro-gamer goes offline. He’s being annoyed. Pestered. Harassed.

[Han Sooyoung]: it’s 700k words of unpolished trash

[Han Sooyoung]: uk my other beta reader is fucking ill he’ll find a reason to keep going if u don’t split the workload. Dont think hes properly slept in a year

He does not know who this other beta reader is or why he is compromising his sleep, but that’s none of his business. More importantly, Yoo Joonghyuk is exhausted. He’s never doing an endurance stream again.

[Yoo Joonghyuk]: I’ll agree to this with the stipulation that you never text me ever again.

[Han Sooyoung]: k

[Han Sooyoung]: do u prefer calls

Sure enough, Han Sooyoung never does shut up. Just for now, he takes it.

He tosses his phone onto the bed stand.

ASDLKSDFLSD@#KJFSDLKFJSDMLKASD’ALSKDC;ASLLZDFKC!@#$@#$ (edit version)

Ever since Kim Doyoon had laid his eyes on Yoo Joonhyun, he’d never been able to look away. Not even in the span of 1863 regressions, across 3149 chapters and separated by a thin screen. This remains a fact, even when lies become truth, and fiction becomes reality.

 

Or, a love that transcends boundaries.

 

…

Opened August 17, 2020 (Shared with: Kim Dokja, Yoo Joonghyuk…)

He lives. The entirety of last night floats at the back of Kim Dokja’s mind like a fever dream throughout the train ride to work, but Han Sooyoung’s notifications are there, on his lock screen, reminding him that he’s still friends with this witch. Sometimes, he thinks he needs to inebriate himself in order to stop perceiving his constant, tenacious headache.

In fact, he’s recently been trying to improve his diet, but sometimes he still drugs himself with cheap black coffee to numb the drone of reality. Such as now, after an hour of being yelled at by Han Myungoh.

Kim Dokja scowls, throws his head back and scalds his oesophagus in the process.

“It’s not your fault, Dokja-ssi,” his coworker’s lips curve in sympathy, like she always does. “The department head tends to be temperamental like that.”

“He’s an asshole. He’s always doing this to me,” Kim Dokja grits. “I did the report just as he asked, then he yells at me for a mix-up that isn’t even my fault. ”

He’d spent over a week compiling documents and slogging away at his desk to do just this one thing right. And as if all his effort meant nothing, Han Myungoh tore everything to pieces and spat abuse to his face. He hasn’t even been promoted to a permanent employee yet.

Yoo Sangah’s eyes soften.

“I know. I tried to speak to him earlier,” she sighs somewhat raggedly. “If I have to be honest, the department head has been getting on my nerves for the longest time. There’s almost no hope for him. You shouldn’t blame yourself.”

Slowly, his vexation begins to dissolve, melting out of his bones. Yoo Sangah is the second person to ever say this to him, after his mother.

“I don’t,” Kim Dokja murmurs, fidgeting with his cup.

Yoo Sangah smiles. “That’s good. Maybe you should do something to wind down for the weekend.”

At that moment, his screen lights up, perhaps a sign.

“Sure,” he shrugs, checking the time. “Does work end at six today?”

Upon receiving a nod of affirmation, Kim Dokja tosses his paper cup into the bin and retreats back to his cubicle, ready to burn through another stack of paperwork.

Later at night, he settles in bed with his laptop, the only source of light illuminating the dingy room. Kim Dokja shuffles into a position that wouldn’t give him a crippling backache in the morning, opens Han Sooyoung’s document, and starts typing.

Suggestions queue up underneath barely readable lines until the dull taps of fingers against Kim Dokja’s keyboard start to echo in his ears.

Disregarding free labour, the benefit of being Han Sooyoung’s—top web novelist and award-winning writer—editor is getting a headstart to her entire manuscript. Thankfully for her, he has nothing better to do.

Kim Dokja: [Highlighted text] exposition here a little confusing, could use some revision

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: “Hello,” “Hello, Joonhyun-ah.”

Kim Dokja: isn’t this more impactful? considering kim doyoon’s utter devotion to the regressor

Kim Dokja: cool line

Kim Dokja: OH SHIT HE PUNCHED YOO JOONHYUN???

Yoo Joonghyuk: Stop spamming.

A blink, then a double-take.

That’s not Han Sooyoung.

Confused, he types out a response.

Kim Dokja: ur not han sooyoung

He presses send, then waits. A full minute passes as though the person on the other side is considering a reply, and gives in.

Yoo Joonghyuk: No.

So it's not a hallucination.

Kim Dokja: who r u? how did u get access to this doc

Kim Dokja: why did u get access to this doc

Yoo Joonghyuk: I was granted access.

Strange. Han Sooyoung only ever trusts her closest friends with her raw drafts. And sure, just because Han Sooyoung is one of Kim Dokja’s only friends doesn’t mean he is Han Sooyoung’s only close friend too; he’s probably heard a few names mentioned in passing, but ‘Yoo Joonghyuk’ is new.

Kim Dokja quickly checks the document status. Somehow, he’d missed the fact that this ‘Yoo Joonghyuk’ person is a contributor. What’s the proper etiquette in this kind of situation, again?

Kim Dokja: well

Kim Dokja: hello yoo joonghyuk-ssi

Nothing can go wrong with a nice polite greeting, Kim Dokja thinks. Moments later, he receives a reply.

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Everything can go wrong with a nice polite greeting.

Like he hasn’t just ignored a kind stranger, Yoo Joonghyuk proceeds to further ignore Kim Dokja. A string of new comments made under his username float up one by one, a sign that he’s completely over whatever interaction they’ve just shared. Kim Dokja watches his curt responses to Han Sooyoung’s mistakes pile up like a week’s worth of laundry in his room.

It’s rude. It’s constructive. If Kim Dokja harboured any doubts about Yoo Joonghyuk’s linguistic ability, it’s been erased by now. But somehow, that fact leaves a salty taste in his mouth.

A wry smile pulls at his face. If Yoo Joonghyuk will not acknowledge him, Kim Dokja will simply make him.

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] This does not make sense.

Yoo Joonghyuk: The sentence structure is off. The theory is impalpable. Potential for many plot holes if not handled well.

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] Stop overusing slang in your dialogue.

Kim Dokja: hello yoo joonghyuk-ssi

Yoo Joonghyuk: Consider brushing up on your foreshadowing. This came out from complete nowhere.

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] There was no mention of where or when he’d obtained his sword.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Why is Kim Doyoon obsessed with Yoo Joonhyun’s looks?

Kim Dokja: hello yoo joonghyuk-ssi

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] You could make the description less obnoxious. Yoo Joonhyun’s face is starting to become annoying to imagine.

Kim Dokja: why r u ignorign me

Yoo Joonghyuk has left the document.

Oh. Oh.

Kim Dokja feels his shoulders tremble—out of sheer indignation, exhaustion, or a caffeine overdose, he doesn’t know. But the sleep-deprivation demon in him eventually wins over, and he lets himself descend into quiet, disbelieving chuckles.

[Chapter ■■ – A Kingless World]

The Fourth Wall was a skill that reduced reality to a novel. But Kim Doyoon did not regard this man as fiction—he was real. Song Minjoon was the asshole who had once beat him up and made his teen years a living hell.

 

He had to solve this problem himself. It would be an issue if the fourth wall shook whenever he met someone who stimulated his traumas.

 

Above all, he was twenty-eight years old now. He was no longer a seventeen-year-old who was flustered by a bully.

 

…

 

“What’s wrong with reading a novel, eh? Did I harm you?” Kim Doyoon spat, swiftly delivering blows to his ex-bully’s face, stomach, chest. “Bastard. I even used some money to buy the books.”

 

…

[Comments]

Yoo Joonghyuk: This is unrealistic.

Kim Dokja: how so

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Doyoon got over his trauma too easily.

Kim Dokja: oh so NOW you speak to me

Kim Dokja: what happened when i greeted u the last time? acting like ur vision is bad?

Yoo Joonghyuk: I wasn’t speaking to you. You replied as I was typing my next sentence.

Kim Dokja: ok sure

Kim Dokja: but ur directly replying to me now, arent u?

Kim Dokja: kdj: 1, yjh: 0

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] Repetitive. Consider using a synonym.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Suggestion: Kim Doyoon said Kim Doyoon smiled

Kim Dokja: are u ignoring me again

Yoo Joonghyuk: Suggestion: He thought to plot He thought of a plot

Kim Dokja: ur personality is bad

Kim Dokja: do u do this to everyone u meet

Yoo Joonghyuk: Depends on whether they have anything worthwhile to say.

Kim Dokja: ? wow ok ur majesty

Kim Dokja: if anything, your comments are inaccurate

Yoo Joonghyuk: Explain.

Kim Dokja: i dont think its completely unrealistic for kim doyoon to overcome his trauma in a sub scenario

Kim Dokja: for one, his knowledge grants him omnipotence in this world

Kim Dokja: plus hes rich. money makes the world go round

Kim Dokja: realising that he can overpower song minjoon means he would likely take revenge

Kim Dokja: u get me?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Still, he was too calm. Too fearless at that moment.

Kim Dokja: well this is the end of the world MC has seen worse by now

Kim Dokja: besides, 11 years can really numb a soul

Yoo Joonghyuk: It's different.

Kim Dokja: explain

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Doyoon views the world as fiction, but Song Minjoon is part of his reality. The effect of his trauma should be more prominent.

Kim Dokja: i think its ok tho? he was already pretty shaken

Kim Dokja: . did u even read my explanation

Yoo Joonghyuk: Yes.

Yoo Joonghyuk: I disagree with it.

Kim Dokja: ?

Kim Dokja: is this a provocation?

Yoo Joonghyuk: [Highlighted text] Emphasise a bit more on Kim Doyoon’s fear.

Yoo Joonghyuk: How did his wolf-like appearance come about?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Suggestion: rose from the ashes with a triumphant laugh This seems wildly out of character.

Kim Dokja: on god ur personality DOES suck

Yoo Joonghyuk: Shut up.

Kim Dokja: .

Call him petty, but he’s not going to lose this one.

Promptly, Kim Dokja shoots back an essay of arguments.

Nothing comes of it. By the end of it, Kim Dokja scrolls through his comment history like a man viewing his darkest secrets, his original objective completely abandoned.

In reality, only a part of his time was actually dedicated to helping Han Sooyoung fix her novel; the other forty-five minutes were wasted on trying to one-up his friend’s friend, who barely even responded with the exception of a couple of full stops.

Kim Dokja: lets say someone dumps scalding hot soup all over ur head 11 years ago during lunch and the scar stays with u for life

Kim Dokja: and u meet this bastard again in the future but in a much better position

Kim Dokja: would u or would u not rip him a new one

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ur lying

It’s like Yoo Joonghyuk’s system was programmed to auto-respond this way to anything ridiculous. Then again, Kim Dokja had been informed of his indomitable patience in the past and it just…spiralled from there.

By the time dawn rolls about and sunlight streams through his paper-thin curtains, the realisation that he hasn’t at all slept hits him like an anvil of regret. Again.

Yoo Joonghyuk is a horrible person.

At that moment, his phone vibrates.

[Han Sooyoung]: wtf

[Han Sooyoung]: u two?

Kim Dokja stares at his open chat and feels a smidgen of shame. 

[Kim Dokja]: what

It’s the lack of sleep, he says to himself. Or malnutrition. Thankfully, Han Sooyoung doesn’t seem to be mad at all.

[Han Sooyoung]: u guys getting along quite well

[Kim Dokja]: heh

[Kim Dokja]: its as u see

[Kim Dokja]: yoo joonghyuk-ssi loves me

[Han Sooyoung]: ㅋ

“—useless! Why are there so many bugs in the beta? The game is set for release—”

Oh my god.

“—did you even check? I explicitly told you to submit the list—”

Shut up.

“—what did we hire you for if you aren’t going to do your job properly, huh? You don’t have many chances left, Kim Dokja. Let me just remind you that your contract is set to expire next March.”

Kim Dokja wishes he could lose the suffocating suit and go for his supervisor’s neck. It’s just murder, nothing special. His mother has done it before. But then the receipt for last week’s worth of convenience store meals floats before his eyes and reminds him of the numerous other bills he has to pay, promptly halting his hand.

It’s just corporate slavery. He’s used to this.

Behind his desk, Han Myungoh yawps on about all of his supposed inadequacies for a full fifteen minutes. Kim Dokja hopes keeping his breath even will smooth over the lump in his throat. 

“—You hear me?”

“Yes,” Kim Dokja stiffly smiles, then bows. “Excuse me.”

Perhaps finding a new job by March is for the best.

Once the door to Han Myungoh’s office shuts, he touches a hand to his forehead and groans. Kim Dokja pulls out his phone and fumbles for his text messages. He’s fucking tired.

Kim Dokja: working at this place is like the apocalypse

Kim Dokja: living dead everywhere. shit environment. 0 survivability

Kim Dokja: han myungoh just cant fucking shut up

Kim Dokja: an apocalypse would be wonderful, actually

Kim Dokja: murder would be legal and perfectly acceptable

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja’s midway through furiously typing a response when it hits him.

Wait.

“...Kim Dokja-ssi? What are you doing outside the department head’s office?” One of his colleagues passes by and shoots him a strange look. “What happened? Do you feel fine?”

Kim Dokja makes an awkward noise. “Oh. Uh, don’t worry about it. I’m fine.”

And then he makes a run for it—only, it’s more of a strained waddle as he forces his legs to go as fast as they can without actually looking like he’s fleeing. Fortunately, his colleague goes on his way without another word. Kim Dokja barely makes it into a restroom stall and locks it before he turns his phone on again.

When the screen flickers to life, a different app opens, and a different name gazes back at him. 

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Huh. That’s not Han Sooyoung.

Kim Dokja: sry wrong chat

A long pause.

Kim Dokja almost gives up on receiving a response until a new comment appears beneath his.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Who’s Han Myungoh?

Yoo Joonghyuk is…curious? Kim Dokja wants to doubt his eyes, but he can’t be seeing things this time. The scolding had fully shocked him awake.

Kim Dokja: an asshole.

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: i meant my supervisor

Kim Dokja: he’s sick

Yoo Joonghyuk: Enough for you to want to start an apocalypse, apparently.

Kim Dokja: now thats not what i said

Kim Dokja: i said i hoped an apocalypse would start not that i want to be the catalyst for one

Yoo Joonghyuk: It was implied.

Kim Dokja: u picking a fight?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ok i want an apocalypse to start or i want to start an apocalypse. doestn matter

Kim Dokja: lets just say in both scenarios, han myungoh needs to die

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: wait before u call the police let me present my defence

Yoo Joonghyuk: What could you possibly say that would convince me otherwise.

Kim Dokja: alright hear me out

Kim Dokja: han myungoh’s fucked up

Kim Dokja: firstly he contributes nothing but negativity to society we need him gone

Kim Dokja: secondly hes a creep, always tryign to hit my coworkers

Kim Dokja: hit on* but im pretty sure he would hit them bc hes just that misogynistic

Yoo Joonghyuk: Deplorable.

Kim Dokja: RIGHT? ur already agreeing wif me

Kim Dokja: but im not done

Kim Dokja: damn bastard’s always after my head

Kim Dokja: dk what it is abt me tbh

Kim Dokja: is it my face? my personality? the fact that the woman hes drooling after rather befriend me than accept his advances?

Kim Dokja: fucker

Kim Dokja: i do my work. come on time. work like a dog

Kim Dokja: yet he always has a bone to pick and yells at me for every tiny little thing like its my fault and my fault alone

Kim Dokja: seriously i

A loud knock on his stall yanks him back to reality.

“Kim Dokja-ssi?” the voice asks.

It’s the coworker from before, who sharply knocks again at his shocked silence. Kim Dokja flinches at the reverberation of his voice. “Kim Dokja-ssi, can you hear me?”

Kim Dokja’s grip around his phone tightens—can the man not speak any softer? The echo is dreadly. “Yes, I can.”

“Oh, good,” his colleague says. “Yoo Sangah-ssi said she saw you rushing off to the restroom alone. You’ve been in here for a while. I told her I would help check up on you.”

“Right,” Kim Dokja says back. It hasn’t even been that long. Men. “I’ll be out soon.”

Satisfied with his answer, the coworker backs off, leaving Kim Dokja to stew in silence. Kim Dokja waits for his footsteps to recede before he unlocks his stall.

On his screen, a new notification has floated up.

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Is Yoo Joonghyuk worried, or confused? Either way, Kim Dokja isn’t smiling.

Kim Dokja: to clarify i have not died

Kim Dokja: someone interrupted me

Yoo Joonghyuk: I see.

Kim Dokja: u sound disappointed??

Kim Dokja: unfortunately for u but u will never be rid of me

Yoo Joonghyuk: Aren’t you at work?

Kim Dokja: how would u know that

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ok fine i am but as i said this place is a shithole i think i deserve a break

“Kim Dokja-ssi?”

Apparently not. Kim Dokja glances out the entrance tiredly. “...Coming.”

Just in case, he hastily types out a ‘sry gtg’ in the comment box and slips his phone into his pocket. Then, Kim Dokja runs his hands under water and splashes it all over his face.

Shit.

He can already feel the headache building.

Kim Dokja barely makes it through the rest of the day. Any sense of solidarity he felt with those sleep-deprived, underpaid workers was extinguished after the nth time someone went up to him and interrogated him on some non-existent feature in their ongoing project.

His colleague stares at his paper. No one knows what he’s been doing the past week. “Are you sure-”

“Yes,” he says.

“How about-”

“Everything is in the report.” Kim Dokja feels his tongue burn from how much he’s said this. “If you even bothered to read it.”

In response, his colleague frowns. “Okay, okay. I’m just asking.”

After that, he settles back in his desk and opens a tab to, what seems to be, a game of Minesweeper. The prior report he’d been asking about lies forgotten on his desk.

Everyone in the office is dead to Kim Dokja.

On the train home, all the seats are taken. It doesn’t even matter anymore.

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: grabs the woman’s arm tugs the woman’s arm

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: “Don’t interfere,” he snapped.

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: “You never even did your job right Die

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja: ?

Yoo Joonghyuk: What are you doing.

Kim Dokja: men are horrible

Yoo Joonghyuk: You are a man.

Kim Dokja: ? i am a woman

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja: sorry…sorry. i lied

Kim Dokja: anyway

Kim Dokja: yes i am a man. ur point?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: speechless?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Your stupidity baffles me.

Kim Dokja: uk ur just proving my point, right?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ?

Kim Dokja: is punctuation all u have in ur vocabulary

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: this is a horrible new way of ignorign me

Yoo Joonghyuk: I’m not ignoring you.

Kim Dokja: oh?

Kim Dokja: ur finally looking my way? dont tell me…

Kim Dokja: joonghyuk-ah likes me?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Shut up.

Kim Dokja: thas not a denial

Yoo Joonghyuk: I hardly even know you.

Kim Dokja: still not a denial

Kim Dokja: but otherwise, that can be corrected

Kim Dokja: wanna get to know each other? ;)

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: why are u so bland

Kim Dokja: weve been acquainted for…close to a month, now?

Kim Dokja: surely its time we move forward from where we are

Kim Dokja: we will never grow closer if someone doesnt take the first step

Yoo Joonghyuk: Shouldn’t you be editing this document instead?

Kim Dokja: come on im bored

Kim Dokja: the train is packed idk what else to do

Kim Dokja: besides

Kim Dokja: i had kind of a rough day

Kim Dokja: u know, toxic workplace environments?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ill be nice and start first

Kim Dokja: my name is kim dokja, as in reader

Yoo Joonghyuk: I didn’t say yes.

Kim Dokja: silence is consent

Yoo Joonghyuk: No it's not.

Kim Dokja: ok maybe not but i rule by decree

Kim Dokja: anyway

Kim Dokja: im a 28yo man who works at Minosoft and i like to read web novels

Kim Dokja: currently in the midst of an existential crisis

Kim Dokja: could possibly die of food poisoning before 40

Kim Dokja: uh

Kim Dokja: i’m an only child as my name suggests, although purely by coincidence

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Yoo Joonghyuk: Stop revealing your information.

Kim Dokja: why?

Yoo Joonghyuk: It’s dangerous.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Do you do this with every stranger you’ve met online?

Kim Dokja: i dont meet ppl online?

Kim Dokja: ur harmless anyways

Yoo Joonghyuk: You have so much faith?

Kim Dokja: in han sooyoung, yes

Kim Dokja: besides whats the worst that could happen

Yoo Joonghyuk: I could find you.

Kim Dokja: and kill me?

Yoo Joonghyuk: I will not.

Kim Dokja: thanks?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: aw come on

Kim Dokja: the fact that ur even asking me this anyway probably means u have no ill intent

Kim Dokja: if ur that worried u can just do the same

Kim Dokja: name, age, occupation, hobby

Kim Dokja: whatever u may reveal

Yoo Joonghyuk: Why would I put myself at risk?

Kim Dokja: i mean, if anyone, im at risk right now

Kim Dokja: dont tell me ur just pretending?

Kim Dokja: are u stalling for time so u can gracefully leave this conversation with my personal particulars?

Kim Dokja: i wont give u my bank details just putting it out there

Yoo Joonghyuk: I am not. Do not.

Kim Dokja: good on u

Kim Dokja: just think of it as an equivalent exchange

Kim Dokja: one-sided relationships never work out you know?

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: ㅋㅋ

Yoo Joonghyuk: Fine.

Kim Dokja: yayy

Yoo Joonghyuk: Whatever is in this document, stays in this document.

Kim Dokja: yes sir

Kim Dokja: so

Kim Dokja: Attached: [microphone.png]

Kim Dokja: your answer?

Ding.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Yoo Joonghyuk, 28.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Pro gamer.

It’s not until Kim Dokja’s well at home and sprawled in bed after a jolting cold shower that he actually processes Yoo Joonghyuk’s words. A casual search on the internet shockingly reveals an existing Wikipedia page, a fully developed profile, and the fact that Yoo Joonghyuk’s words are true.

Kim Dokja’s brain stutters to a halt.

His first instinct is to question how Han Sooyoung is even acquainted, let alone on good terms with such a huge public figure. Then it occurs to him—Han Sooyoung is famous. Not as famous as Yoo Joonghyuk from what he’s seen, but enough to be connected.

Shooting upright and, in some maddened haze, Kim Dokja skims through their comment history for anything overtly offensive he’s said. Nothing comes up, but the adrenaline from his discovery hasn’t died down.

Yoo Joonghyuk is a celebrity.

Kim Dokja has been far too brazen.

Still, his job contract is still in place; Kim Dokja’s electricity is working and the landlord hasn’t evicted him out of the blue either. He rationalises that with his influence, if Yoo Joonghyuk had felt slighted in the least, he would’ve done something by now. It’s a small comfort knowing that he hasn’t majorly fucked up yet.

Kim Dokja barely allows his shock to subside before opening a chat window.

[Kim Dokja]: ?

[Han Sooyoung]: ?

[Kim Dokja]: ??

[Han Sooyoung]: what are you trying to say

[Kim Dokja]: yoo joonghyuk is a pro gamer

Three rippling dots float below her contact, indicating that she’s typing. It disappears and reappears a few times, as if hesitating. And Han Sooyoung never hesitates.

[Han Sooyoung]: you didnt know?

Kim Dokja grimaces. Is it that shocking? Surely, it’s not just his problem.

[Kim Dokja]: NO

[Han Sooyoung]: :laughing_crying:

[Han Sooyoung]: he told you?

[Kim Dokja]: throuhg fucking google docs

[Kim Dokja]: i literally just volunteered my name age and workplace

[Han Sooyoung]: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

The laughter is so explosive that Kim Dokja feels it jump out of his screen and intrude on his space. Scowling, he types a message out.

[Kim Dokja]: shut the fcuk up what if i lose my job

[Han Sooyoung]: dont worry this isnt a kdrama

[Han Sooyoung]: sir pro gamer may be horribly rude but he dislikes abusing power for petty reasons

[Kim Dokja]: how would u know

[Han Sooyoung]: ive known him for a while now

[Kim Dokja]: looks can be deceiving

[Han Sooyoung]: if hes hiding anything, then hes bloody good at it

[Han Sooyoung]: not that id put it past him

[Han Sooyoung]: i mean, have you seen his face??

Kim Dokja, in fact, hasn’t.

Out of curiosity, he opens a browser and punches in the characters for Yoo Joonghyuk’s name again. In retrospect, the dozens of search predictions that appear below the search bar should’ve been a sign, but that’s not what catches his attention.

It’s the defined jaw, thick eyebrows and sharp onyx eyes peeking through his faintly curled bangs; the cold confidence Yoo Joonghyuk oozes just with expensive headphones slung around his neck and hands shoved into his black, neon-trimmed jacket douses Kim Dokja in a bucket of awe.

Admittedly, he stares at the picture for a little too long. As though the pro gamer’s mystery-laden gaze is reaching out of his box and pinning him in place.

Yoo Joonghyuk is devastatingly handsome.

So much that he feels unreal, and Kim Dokja isn’t quite sure how to wrap his head around this fact. Like the gap between two strangers, acquaintances at most, couldn’t be any larger.

Huh.

[Han Sooyoung]: hey?

[Han Sooyoung]: you there

[Han Sooyoung]: its been 10 mins

[Han Sooyoung]: you just googled him, didnt you

[Kim Dokja]: yeah

[Han Sooyoung]: lol

[Han Sooyoung]: done ogling?

Kim Dokja grimaces, but it’s more like grinding his teeth.

[Kim Dokja]: stop talking

Send.

He forces his phone into sleep mode, falls back onto his mattress, and ends up staring blankly at the flaking ceiling. The night is still, apart from the dying whirrs of his rusty fan.

It’s quiet, Kim Dokja thinks.

He hasn’t visited his mother in a while.

Perhaps if he’d been born under different circumstances, he could’ve accomplished a little more; studied well, graduated from a decent university and work a modest job. Lee Sookyoung would be out of prison, crossing her legs on the couch and elegantly flipping through old books.

Except that can never be his reality, now. Things will never return to the way they were.

Kim Dokja is alone.

Yoo Joonghyuk’s face ghosts his mind for the following week.

Chapter Text

“I’m not sure about this,” Kim Dokja says nervously. They’ve just clocked out of work, the project they’ve been working on has just been confirmed for launch, and it’s ten. He isn’t home yet. “Perhaps I should get going first…”

He stands up, ready to excuse himself, but Deputy Yoon reaches across the table and gives his cuffs a little tug. “Come on, sit down. Why leave when we’ve barely started?”

Because he doesn’t want to start. Kim Dokja smiles politely. “I have to be home early,” he lies through his teeth.

“Oh? Does Dokja-ssi perhaps have a girlfriend waiting for him-”

“No.”

“Ah. Well, if that’s the case, then what’s stopping you?” Deputy Yoon boisterously laughs, repeatedly gesturing for him to sit down. Deputy Yoon, with his never-ending patience. He swipes a glass off the table and grabs a bottle of soju by the neck. “You know, you’re always so closed off sometimes, and you never join us for employee events. It’s rare that we got you to be here at all.”

“I apologise,” says Kim Dokja. Let him go. “But I don’t-”

“Just this once, alright?” Deputy Yoon lightheartedly cuts in. “We’re celebrating. My treat.”

It’s just a project, he thinks. They’ve done dozens of those, so Kim Dokja hardly understands what there is to celebrate. But trapped by his coworkers’ stares, he slowly sits down.

Taking it as a sign of acquiesce, Deputy Yoon smiles and holds the glass out. Tips a generous amount of alcohol into it and hands it to Kim Dokja, whose hands fumble to grasp it.

“Uh, I-”

“It’s a small one. That’s the least you could do, right?” the man says, inciting the cheers of everyone at the table.

“Come on, Dokja-ssi!”

“Drink it! Drink it!”

“I can’t,” Kim Dokja bites his lip. “I’ve never tried…”

“Try it. Who knows when you’ll learn to have some fun outside those web novels of yours, if ever. Got to be a little reckless before we hit our thirties, know what I mean? Anyway, it’s just one shot,” Deputy Yoon reassures. “We won’t keep you for too long.”

With that, he nudges the glass in Kim Dokja’s direction. Deputy Yoon doesn’t seem like he’s intending to go easy. The liquid tilts, sloshing back and forth, churning his gut, and something in the man’s blithe eyes must’ve convinced him, because Kim Dokja, albeit cautiously, takes it.

He’d missed his dose of caffeine today, anyway. Maybe it’s easier to remain courteous when drunk (or think, at all).

Just one. One glass, and it’ll be over soon.

In one languid motion, Kim Dokja throws his head back and gulps. The alcohol sizzles on its way down, and horrible. It tastes horrible.

That’s not the last drink he takes.

“One more!”

Again.

“Another one!”

And again.

“More!”

Kim Dokja is a goddamned pushover.

Still, he can’t anymore. This is his limit. Muddled, he shakes his head slowly. “No more.”

The view of the restaurant sways, and the coworkers sitting round their table have been reduced into blobs for his addled mind to process. But Kim Dokja isn’t quite intoxicated yet, just a bit fuzzy, trying to disengage before control is lost. He’s never gotten drunk before, and he doesn’t want to find out what it’s like.

He stumbles to his feet using the table as support. “Sorry…I have t’ get going now.”

“Wha…so early?” a faceless colleague scrunches his nose, checking the time with his phone. It’s upside down. “Five…five-eleven…”

“It’s one-fifteen in the m’rning, idiot,” someone butts in. “Come on, we’re just getting started—eh? You’re leaving already?”

“Yes,” Kim Dokja slurs a little. “I have somewhere t’ be.”

Through the flush on his face, Deputy Yoon looks surprised. “Already? Come on, Dokja-ssi-” 

“Goodbye,” Kim Dokja emphasises.

Wordlessly, he downs a glass of water and wobbles his way to the exit, leaving his coworkers whispering behind his back. Kim Dokja wonders if they know he has good hearing.

“...spoilsport…”

“...didn’t want to believe it…those rumors about him…”

The door inches close behind him. Kim Dokja leaves with a headache worse than when he entered.

(It’s fine. He’s used to this.)

He barely manages to make it down the street before his brain finally taps out. The haze of alcohol must be strong, because when he starts to pat his pockets for his phone, it takes him a little over five minutes before he eventually fishes the device out of his blazer.

Click.

It turns on. Kim Dokja heaves a sigh.

Kim Dokja: hanm sooyng

Kim Dokja: han sooyong

She should be awake at this hour, right? Not that he likes bothering her when she’s usually working. He just…really needs a taxi.

Kim Dokja: hansooung hurry up

Kim Dokja: plese

Silence.

Ding.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja?

Oh, Kim Dokja breathes. It comes out as a choked laugh. He really has a talent for mixing things up, doesn’t he?

Clumsily, his fingers smush out a reply.

Kim Dokja: hi jjoonhyukie

Kim Dokja: where is han sooung

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Han Sooyoung isn’t here.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja?

Yoo Joonghyuk: What happened.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Hey.

He feels his head loll to the side. Kim Dokja’s phone is a blur in his hands.

Kim Dokja: where is sooyungie

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: dont telk me uou took her

Yoo Joonghyuk: Suggestion: dont telk me uou took her

Yoo Joonghyuk: Are you drunk?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Idiot, you’re writing in the document.

Kim Dokja: Suggestion: am not

Yoo Joonghyuk: Suggestion: am not

Yoo Joonghyuk: Stop.

Kim Dokja: i said im nnomt drunk

Kim Dokja: just

Kim Dokja: a lil tipssy

Kim Dokja: i could nevr be drunk

Or that’d be a problem. Kim Dokja knows what a little too much alcohol mixed with a little too much despair can do to someone. Screaming matches, broken bottles, and blood. Lots of blood.

Ding.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Are you outside?

Kim Dokja: maybe

Kim Dokja: ur goinf to assassinaste me?

Yoo Joonghyuk: No. I am going to get you a ride.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Address.

Kim Dokja: um

He squints at a signpost across the road. It looks like a big Egyptian hieroglyphic.

Suddenly, not due to the chilly weather, his sniffling starts to get a little emotional. The alcohol is stirring him up.

Kim Dokja’s sick. He wants to go home.

Kim Dokja: lookks like ill have t disappoint u

Kim Dokja: confrary to popular belief i just. camt see

Yoo Joonghyuk: You’re wasted.

Kim Dokja: im nott

Kim Dokja: stopj it

Yoo Joonghyuk: Where did you go to get drinks?

Kim Dokja: ummmmh

Kim Dokja: dunno

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

At this point, Kim Dokja blanks out. His soul ascends to Nirvana and stops being around to supervise what his body is doing. Kim Dokja loiters in this state a few blocks away from the restaurant until an uncertain amount of time later, when the document is filled with gibberish. He never knew he had so much to say.

Not that Yoo Joonghyuk seems to mind, though. He’s still here, typing back.

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja.

Unfortunately, before he can reply, the battery flickers on-screen, barely a second before it disappears, completely drained. No amount of slapping or smacking brings it back to life; the price to pay for cheap technology.

Shit, shit, shit.

It’s one in the morning, the last train has long departed, and Kim Dokja is an hour and a half away from home.

He might have to walk.

Kim Dokja stares down at his phone, then at his cheap, battered shoes.

Somehow, the sharpness of the midnight breeze on his face feels inexplicably hopeless.

He wakes up with a raging hangover. Thank god it’s a Saturday.

Miraculously, Kim Dokja comes back to life slumped against his apartment’s front door. Only the constellations know how on earth he made it back and unlocked the door without getting run over by a car, but he can hardly bring himself to care.

Right now, a throbbing ache assaults his temples, aggravated by the pint of light punching through his curtains. The memories come a while after.

…Awful. Kim Dokja is no stranger to mistakes but last night might take the cake. God forbid he ever does this again. He wants to pass right out.

Why. Why?

He crawls across his living area and plugs his pathetically dead phone in a little reluctantly. Kim Dokja gives it a minute, then receives a spam of notifications, most of which came from the same person.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja.

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Yoo Joonghyuk: Reply.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Hey.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Did you fall asleep on the streets?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Where are you.

Oddly enough, Kim Dokja has never seen so many words come from Yoo Joonghyuk in his life. Probably because he’s only known the man for a month, give or take, but it’s refreshing to see nonetheless. Perhaps Yoo Joonghyuk can be nice if he wants to.

The stream of comments stretches past a page but makes up only the latter half of their conversation. Carefully, Kim Dokja scrolls up to make sure he hasn’t completely humiliated himself.

Kim Dokja: i think i cn see a bit of the letters

Yoo Joonghyuk: What does it say?

Kim Dokja: chun

Kim Dokja: chunmo?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Chungmuro?

Kim Dokja: just kiddgin i dont think it say that

Yoo Joonghyuk: This is pointless.

Yoo Joonghyuk: How much did you drink?

Kim Dokja: a few shots

Yoo Joonghyuk: A few?

Kim Dokja: a few dozsens

Kim Dokja: its my first tine i dony know

Yoo Joonghyuk: You drank so much on your first time?

Kim Dokja: ud think someone had drowned

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Yoo Joonghyuk: I’m texting Han Sooyoung.

Kim Dokja: sotppp

Kim Dokja: no

Kim Dokja: heyh

Yoo Joonghyuk: Stop spamming. She may be able to help.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Weren’t you looking for her in the first place?

Kim Dokja: i changd my plan

Kim Dokja: she will kill me

Kim Dokja: she is like my mnom but less

Yoo Joonghyuk: Are there any taxis around at this hour?

Kim Dokja: people have a life joonghyuj ah

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Yoo Joonghyuk: Read the sign again. Clearly.

Kim Dokja: alkslakdjdjs

The unintelligible conversation continues for another half an hour or so, mainly due to the large gaps in between his responses. Each one shortens Kim Dokja’s lifespan by a few years.

Yoo Joonghyuk: What were you doing?

Kim Dokja: m work party thng

Kim Dokja: wanted to go home bt they wouoldnt let me

Kim Dokja: downed a few

Yoo Joonghyuk: And they just let you go like that?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Did no one help you call a taxi?

Kim Dokja: nmo

Kim Dokja: ud be surpriseed joonghykah

Kim Dokja: how vile people can get

Kim Dokja: when someone acts a little differnt

Kim Dokja: has secrets

Kim Dokja: or are alwys up in their head jst becse they have a little power and positin

Yoo Joonghyuk: Is this about your supervisor?

Kim Dokja: its evryone

Kim Dokja: everyone is mean

Kim Dokja: to me

A flinch.

This isn’t…embarrassing, per se, but it’s honest. Kim Dokja is rarely honest. His fingers twitch to delete the comment, but realises Yoo Joonghyuk would’ve already seen it.

Overthinking. He’s overthinking.

Kim Dokja skims through the rest, too weary to continue.

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Are you still there?

The thread ends with that, where he assumes he must’ve begun his Journey to the West and voodooed his way home. Its timestamp marks an hour and a half after Kim Dokja’s first comment.

A trickle of guilt passes through his ribs. He should respond.

Kim Dokja’s fingers hover over the keypad as he thinks over it for a moment.

Kim Dokja: hi

Kim Dokja: sorry about that

Unexpectedly, a reply comes swiftly. Almost as if Yoo Joonghyuk is worried.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Where are you.

Kim Dokja: im home

Kim Dokja: magicked it down the street

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: sorry. sorry

Kim Dokja: just

Kim Dokja: dont worry about it

Kim Dokja: the real question is why r u awake

Yoo Joonghyuk: Morning jog.

Kim Dokja: at…6am?

Yoo Joonghyuk: No.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Just for today.

Kim Dokja: oh

Kim Dokja: is it bc of me?

Pause, like he’s debating on telling the truth. 

Yoo Joonghyuk: No.

Kim Dokja: ah

Kim Dokja: well nice to see someone leading a healthy lifestyle

Yoo Joonghyuk: This is the bare minimum.

Kim Dokja: No It Is Not

Yoo Joonghyuk: What.

Kim Dokja: in my defence i do lead a healthy lifestyle

Kim Dokja: although that depends on your definition of a healthy lifestyle

Kim Dokja: does a balanced diet of coffee and kimbap count

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: that was a joke

Kim Dokja: i dont think passing out was enough

Yoo Joonghyuk: Do you always joke about your health like that?

His throat closes up. Swallows.

Kim Dokja doesn’t know if he does. Maybe it’s a sign that suffering has become a part of his life.

Kim Dokja: maybe?

Kim Dokja: idk

Kim Dokja: my head hrts

Kim Dokja: sorry

Kim Dokja: ive apologised way too much this fine morning

Kim Dokja: sorry

Kim Dokja: fuck

Kim Dokja: i should sleep

Another ding. However, Kim Dokja cannot bring himself to look before he scampers off to his bathroom to wash away the reek of alcohol. Something in the way Yoo Joonghyuk words his messages is getting to him. Or maybe the hangover is making him sick.

Either way, he’s tired. Everything aches.

Later on, he stands in the shower motionless, heatless water bouncing off his skin. The sting of it is somewhat dull.

Kim Dokja opens the comment later. There’s a link.

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5921864

Kim Dokja: ?

He swaddles himself under his blanket and waits. The warmth almost lulls him to hibernation.

Yoo Joonghyuk: My ongoing stream.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Watch it.

Despite the absurd timing, the sheer dubiety of this statement moves Kim Dokja’s hand, and he turns on his side to reach for his earpiece. He pops them in and clicks on the link.

The first thing that appears is a window of game UI.

And calmly sitting in the bottom corner of the screen is Yoo Joonghyuk; razor-sharp gaze and self-assured posture, fingers tapping away at the keyboard almost effortlessly.

Kim Dokja doesn’t know what he was expecting, but Yoo Joonghyuk is stunning. None of the pictures floating around on the internet can ever compare to the real deal. If he were a little more delusional, he’d say he could feel Yoo Joonghyuk’s handsomeness hitting him through the screen.

[Constellation ‘uri777’ has sponsored 300 coins.]

[uri777]: please dont pick up the jade

[uri777]: noooooo…!! :sob::sob:

[abflamesdragon]: dark castle arc?

[user1135896988]: omg are those wings??

[sklover]: ohh boss fight time

[1864_4ever]: boss fight boss fight boss fight!!

The avatar on-screen draws his sword and lunges for the enemy. Against Yoo Joonghyuk’s complete silence, the soft clashing of weapons and battle sound effects are almost ASMR-ish, but the fight is over in a blink. As expected of a pro gamer.

[marinegod_ljh]: MASTERRR sorry im late :sob:

[marinegod_ljh]: wait ur already finished with the demon king?

[spspspspangykitty]: he beat it about five minutes ago

[marinegod_ljh]: NOOO

[marinegod_ljh]: aghh i knew i shuldve done my homework first

[marinegod_ljh]: but the livestream notification ambushed me just as soon as i got started and i had to resist the temptation…

[marinegod_ljh]: i thought u said u werent streaming today?

From the corner of his eye, the pro gamer spares a cursory glance at the chat. And then he opens his mouth.

“This is for someone I know.”

[uri777]: ?!?!?!?!? :shock::shock::shock:

[abflamesdragon]: :shock::shock:

[suryanyan]: :shock::shock::shock:

[uri777]: supreme king’s special favour?!?

[marinegod_ljh]: who is it master?? who is it!!

A glare. “None of your business.”

Yoo Joonghyuk’s voice drips into his gut.

Damn.

Kim Dokja curls up in bed, ears hot and tingling. As if god couldn’t favour him any more, Yoo Joonghyuk just has to have a nice voice as well.

He clumsily switches tabs.

Kim Dokja: ?

And he waits. A faint ding can be heard in the distance, causing the pro gamer to pick his phone up, live. Fuck, this is real.

Kim Dokja apprehensively watches Yoo Joonghyuk write a response.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Are you here?

Briefly, he considers lying. But Kim Dokja isn’t certain he wants to know what kind of face the pro gamer makes when he’s disappointed in someone.

Kim Dokja: yes

Yoo Joonghyuk: Good.

Kim Dokja: i dont underfstand

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja: why

Kim Dokja: …this?

Yoo Joonghyuk: You were upset.

Kim Dokja: ?

Yoo Joonghyuk: I don’t speak much during my streams.

Yoo Joonghyuk: I’ve been told that it’s sometimes soothing.

‘Soothing’ isn’t necessarily something he’d associate with a face like Yoo Joonghyuk’s. But whatever he’s doing, it’s working. Just from the deep lilt of his voice, the satisfying clicks of his mouse, Kim Dokja can feel the pent-up tension bleed from his shoulders.

Kim Dokja: for me

Kim Dokja: why?

Only after the comment is delivered does he realise that he’s subconsciously transcribed his thoughts, yet Yoo Joonghyuk doesn’t seem to mind the arbitrary question.

Yoo Joonghyuk: This is my first step.

An answer.

And so, Kim Dokja watches on. By the end of the stream, he is fast asleep, thoroughly serenaded.

Yoo Joonghyuk: I ended the stream.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Hey.

Yoo Joonghyuk: You better be resting.

Yoo Joonghyuk: I’ll kill you if you’re ignoring me.

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Yoo Joonghyuk: Sleep well.

The butterflies stay when Kim Dokja wakes up. He picks up his pillow—but trying to smother them and, by extension, himself, does not work.

Kim Dokja: logically if i poisoned someones drink and they spit it out, they wouldnt die right

Kim Dokja: hypothetically

Yoo Joonghyuk: ??

Kim Dokja: two question marks is very powerful coming from u btw

Yoo Joonghyuk: Kim Dokja, explain.

Kim Dokja: the department head

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5457893

Yoo Joonghyuk: 10pm.

Kim Dokja: oh

Kim Dokja: ill watch it on my laptop

Kim Dokja: slept in today

Kim Dokja: dont feel like moving

Yoo Joonghyuk: It’s almost 9.

Kim Dokja: thats pretty early?

Yoo Joonghyuk: 9 in the evening.

Kim Dokja: oh

Kim Dokja: oops?

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5857462

Yoo Joonghyuk: 10pm.

Kim Dokja: again?

Yoo Joonghyuk: It works.

Kim Dokja: fair enough

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5284013

Yoo Joonghyuk: 10pm.

Kim Dokja: hey

Kim Dokja: should i donate?

Kim Dokja: service fee

Yoo Joonghyuk: I don’t need your money.

Kim Dokja: oh

Yoo Joonghyuk: Buy yourself a proper lunch instead.

Kim Dokja: like what

Yoo Joonghyuk: Non-convenience store meals.

Kim Dokja: i cant afford it

Yoo Joonghyuk: It’s just a few dollars.

Yoo Joonghyuk: Have you ever tried cooking?

Kim Dokja: would u like a picture?

Yoo Joonghyuk: Supreme_king. Add me on Midday Tryst.

Kim Dokja: ㅋ chuuni

.

.

.

Yoo Joonghyuk: That picture you sent me was disgusting.

Kim Dokja: i regret givn u my number

[Chapter ■■ – Disaster of Floods]

“Something is strange. Are you really Captain?” Shin Yoosul’s eyes shifted to Kim Dooyoon’s dead body. “Who is that person? I have never seen such a person before.”

 

…

Kim Dokja: honestly last stream kinda pissed me off

Kim Dokja: stop skipping the plot bastard

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5688643

Yoo Joonghyuk: 10pm.

Kim Dokja: please read through kyrgios’ goddamn story quest

Yoo Joonghyuk: I’ll consider it.

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5653325

Yoo Joonghyuk: Same time.

Kim Dokja: are u going to conquer the industrial complex today

Kim Dokja: theres actually a faster way about it

Yoo Joonghyuk: This is inconvenient. Elaborate in chat.

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5029384

Kim Dokja: STOP KILLING THE DOKKAEBI

Kim Dokja: FUCKKKK

Kim Dokja: does this make us friends

Yoo Joonghyuk: Does it matter?

Kim Dokja: i dont know

Kim Dokja: does it?

Yoo Joonghyuk: starstream.com/livestream/supreme_king/5389535

Yoo Joonghyuk: Time as usual.

[Chapter ■■ – Disaster of Floods]

Yoo Joonhyun remained silent. He merely swung his sword, and that was his only answer. How long did he swing his sword?

 

Yoo Joonhyun slowly opened his mouth.

 

“...That guy.”

 

Shin Yoosul’s face gradually filled with disbelief.

 

“He is my companion.”

 

…

Yoo Sangah surveys him when he steps into the office. “Dokja-ssi?”

Kim Dokja pauses, then gives himself a hasty glance-over. Did he grab the wrong tie in the morning? Or maybe his collar has a stain. Under one pro gamer’s pressure, he’s recently been intimidated into eating something other than microwaveable meals. “What is it?”

“You look healthier,” she says. Her eyes curve pleasantly. “I’m not sure how to describe it.”

Doubtfully, Kim Dokja pulls out his phone and opens the camera app.

Surprisingly, he looks less gaunt. Less tired. The purple under his eyes has smoothed out.

“Huh.” Kim Dokja stares at his reflection. “I guess I’ve been sleeping well these days.”

Kim Dokja: happy six months

Kim Dokja: today is our anniversary

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja: since we first talked that is

Kim Dokja: perhaps we shold celebrate

Yoo Joonghyuk: When will you fix your typos?

Kim Dokja: thats not th point here

Kim Dokja: the*

Kim Dokja: anyway what do u think abt taking the pacifist route for a commemorative stream

Yoo Joonghyuk: Your ulterior motives are showing.

Kim Dokja: i just want to see my dear protagonist reach a happy end

Kim Dokja: its impossible if u keep killing every minor inconvenience

Yoo Joonghyuk: .

Kim Dokja: just kidding

Kim Dokja: honestly u could do whatever u want

Kim Dokja: ur streams are comfy enough

Kim Dokja: i think

Yoo Joonghyuk: You think?

Kim Dokja: save me some pride dammit

Yoo Joonghyuk: Okay.

Kim Dokja: huh

Kim Dokja: ure kind of obedient today

Yoo Joonghyuk: Shut up.

Kim Dokja: ㅋ

Kim Dokja: would u like anything then?

Kim Dokja: tell me fast before i change my mind

Yoo Joonghyuk: ?

Kim Dokja: dont worry abut it

Kim Dokja: i just feel like giving u something today

Kim Dokja: my mood is better lately

Yoo Joonghyuk: If I tell you what I want

Yoo Joonghyuk: Will you grant it?

Kim Dokja: sure

Kim Dokja: anything within reason

The silence lasts a minute.

And then his phone rings. It’s a new number—new, but familiar. Kim Dokja picks up on the fourth beat.

“...Hello?” he says unsurely.

“Kim Dokja?”

The name rolls off Yoo Joonghyuk’s tongue nicely, in a honeyed baritone. Kim Dokja’s murmurs in a voice steadier than his heart, “What is it?”

On the other end, Yoo Joonghyuk takes a breath.

“I want to see you.”

A meet up in a park, of all things, because despite the months of deep companionship they share, Yoo Joonghyuk still pays mind to stranger danger. No evening rendezvous in the privacy of either of their own homes or reservations for a bar. As if his relationship with Han Sooyoung isn’t enough a testament to his character—but it’s such a Yoo Joonghyuk thing to do that it’s okay. Kim Dokja thinks he might even look forward to how positively a famous pro gamer in public will turn out.

For now, he’s stuck in the godforsaken office.

“Hey, Kim Dokja! We need another test run by ten, stay back and help out tonight—”

“Dokja-ssi, could you go a print these out—”

Kim Dokja eyes the cup of scalding hot coffee in his coworker’s hand. If he had nothing left to lose, he would’ve taken it and chucked it at the guy. But he does now. Kim Dokja has an appointment to make.

“I have to leave on time today,” he says, false courtesy in his teeth.

No apology comes after. Perhaps he is acting like one of Yoo Joonghyuk’s die-hard fans, but no one can blame him. After all, Yoo Joonghyuk will be waiting for him at six, sharp, in ten minutes. Kim Dokja cannot afford to be late.

Then there is Han Myungoh.

His supervisor’s face warps into a nasty scowl upon hearing this. “What? Are you trying to skive? ”

Kim Dokja bites back a cuss. “No, I-”

“Do you think you have a lot of time left?” Han Myungoh sneers. “Do you think you can afford to do whatever you want-”

Suddenly, Yoo Sangah slides into view and forces herself into the conversation. Her composed smile makes it appear effortlessly unintentional. “Department head, we currently require more hands on board. I think you will have to step in.”

“What? Alright, but I have to sort this guy out first-”

“I need your assistance,” Yoo Sangah reiterates. “In highlighting the issue.”

The switch in attitude feels personal. Han Myungoh looks disgustingly delighted at the prospect of a woman needing his help. “Well, if that’s the case, I guess everything else can wait…”

And just like that, crisis averted. Before dragging the nuisance away, Yoo Sangah shoots Kim Dokja a meaningful wink behind his back, to which he responds with a concerned frown.

Just treat me to a meal next time, she mouths.

Oh, Kim Dokja muses.

Yoo Sangah is way too nice.

He reciprocates the action anyway, mouthing back. Thank you.

And he’s free. The moment Han Myungoh is out of earshot, Kim Dokja doesn’t manage to neatly stuff his belongings into his work bag before he’s off like the wind. He leaves Minosoft an hour earlier than he usually would with a rumpled tie and tousled hair and everything but none of that matters now. The train station is just a few steps ahead.

Ten minutes later, Kim Dokja stands at their appointed spot, and waits.

It feels like forever before it happens.

In the distance, emerging from the bustling crowd is a handsome face, one that he’s been staring at for the past few months. When the pair of sharp eyes searching the area finally land on him, Kim Dokja’s heart stops in his throat. Watches it click for him; thin black hair, pale skin, cheap suit.

Before he knows it, Yoo Joonghyuk, in the flesh, stops right before him. Around them, the buzz of adults returning home has been reduced to background noise.

Kim Dokja takes a shuddering breath.

Yoo Joonghyuk is gorgeous , dressed in a black turtleneck and tan coat instead of the usual, tacky pro gamer wear. His eyelashes are deathly long, and they brush his cheekbones whenever he blinks.

“Hello,” Kim Dokja murmurs.

“Hello,” Yoo Joonghyuk says back, calm and low.

Silence.

Now that he’s here, Kim Dokja realises that he hadn’t practised what to say. In fact, Yoo Joonghyuk doesn’t appear to know how to start the conversation either, and the two of them merely end up staring at each other.

Though it’s hard to achieve when looking at a face like Yoo Joonghyuk’s. Kim Dokja loses first.

“Um,” he begins, then dies off again.

Yoo Joonghyuk tilts his head patiently. What does he say? The last time he struggled with this, he solved it by simply…rambling. In a moment of panic, Kim Dokja points out something ridiculously obvious.

“...You’re really tall,” he squeaks, neck craned up. “...Shit.”

Unimpressed, Yoo Joonghyuk’s left brow rises in an elegant arc, a perfect display of his personality. If people could verbalise full stops, he would be the epitome of it.

Wow.

The gall of it all forces words out of Kim Dokja. “Truthfully, you’re worse at communication than I am, aren’t you?” Tacks on at the end, “Bastard.”

And the awkward atmosphere is broken.

Yoo Joonghyuk exhales, unimpressed, and damn, he sounds exactly how he types. “Kim Dokja.”

“Yoo Joonghyuk.”

“You’re really thin.”

Blunt bastard. Kim Dokja’s lips curl. “Why is that all you have to say on our first meeting?”

“It’s the truth,” Yoo Joonghyuk remains impassive. “You have atrocious habits.”

“Not all of us have the salary to afford a gourmet meal, dammit.”

“Enough to afford a proper meal, however. Do you always eat garbage?”

“I eat convenience store kimbap. That has rice. It’s a staple.”

“It’s disgusting.”

“...You’re nicer over text, did you know that?”

“And you’re different,” Yoo Joonghyuk says, unusually fixated on Kim Dokja’s face. “Different from what I expected.”

Kim Dokja swallows. “How different?”

“Lovelier,” Yoo Joonghyuk solemnly confesses. “Prettier. More irritating.”

That chokes him up. The noise Kim Dokja makes is eerily similar to that of a dying whale, and he stares, wide-eyed, heat crawling up his neck. Stirred by the sight, Yoo Joonghyuk zeros in on his embarrassment.

It’s hard for a stranger to notice, but there’s an almost imperceptible layer of awe behind Yoo Joonghyuk’s gaze, obscured by a stony front to anyone but Kim Dokja.

And the fact that he sees this makes Yoo Joonghyuk’s admission all the more genuine.

“Shut up,” mumbles Kim Dokja.

“No,” Yoo Joonghyuk blatantly declines.

“Bastard,” Kim Dokja blurts. “You don’t know what you’re saying. I’m not…”

“That is for me to find out,” the pro gamer says, tone laced with finality like he’s deciding for them both. Skips over all manners like he knows something Kim Dokja doesn’t, and worse yet, Kim Dokja doesn’t mind.

(He finds it rather charming.)

“You’re rude,” he says like a matter-of-fact. “You know I just met you, right?”

Yoo Joonghyuk is visibly irked. “Our anniversary just passed. Six months.”

“Um. Anyone could be a killer.”

However, Yoo Joonghyuk doesn’t react to it, as though he accepts it. Instead, he looks down at the salaryman with something fond, like a man enticing a cat with treats. “I can cook well,” he boasts.

Kim Dokja huffs, “And?”

“I can cook for you,” Yoo Joonghyuk tells him. “We could go to my house.”

He doesn’t mention the in-between, but Kim Dokja knows how to read between the lines. Yoo Joonghyuk doesn’t cook for anybody; it’s a piece of trivia listed on his Wikipedia, cited from one of his interviews.

Kim Dokja will be the first.

Huh.

“Do you do this for every stranger you’ve met online?” he asks weakly.

“No. Just this one.”

“According to Article 288 of Korea's Criminal Act, ‘A person who obtains and maintains another under the control of his or hers or a third person by means of threat, use of force or other forms of coercion, or by means of fraud, deception or enticement for the purpose of engaging in indecent-”

Yoo Joonghyuk shoots him a horrified glare. “Why are you like this?”

Kim Dokja’s gaze flies up and away. “I’m just making sure.”

“Stop spouting nonsense and follow me.”

“You are aware of how that sounds, right?”

“Kim Dokja. Yes, or no?”

In front, Yoo Joonghyuk takes a step back and angles his body to the side, anticipating. The action opens up his view of the path leading to the train station.

It’s an invitation.

Kim Dokja cracks a tiny grin.

“Okay.”

He takes it.

[Chapter ■■ – ???]

Yoo Joonhyun manoeuvred his hand to gently brush Kim Doyoon’s bangs out of his eyes. The scarred hand that was only familiar with the handle of a blade turned out surprisingly gentle in its action.

 

Kim Doyoon reeled back. “What are you doing? It’s strange.”

 

The regressor frowned. “Do you dislike it?”

 

Kim Doyoon felt a little weird. “No, but…do you always do this?”

 

“Just you,” Yoo Joonhyun admitted, then realised he couldn’t completely let go of his pride and said, “Your hair is annoying.”

 

…